A02235	----	Bethel, or, A forme for families in which all sorts of both sexes, are soe squarde and framde [sic] by the word, as they may best serue in theire seuerall places, for usefull peices in Gods buildinge / by Mathew Griffith. Griffith, Matthew, 1599?-1665. 1634 Approx. 1 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 1 1-bit group-IV TIFF page image. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2008-09 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A02235 STC 12370A ESTC S2697 24512933 ocm 24512933 27748 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A02235) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 27748) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 1852:25) Bethel, or, A forme for families in which all sorts of both sexes, are soe squarde and framde [sic] by the word, as they may best serue in theire seuerall places, for usefull peices in Gods buildinge / by Mathew Griffith. Griffith, Matthew, 1599?-1665. [1+] p. Printed for Ro. Allott and Hen. Taunton, and are to be sold at their shops at ye Black Beare in Paules Churchyard & in St. Dunstons Churchyard Fleetstreete, London : 1634. Imperfect: lacks all but engraved t.p. Reproduction of original in the Bodleian Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. EEBO-TCP is a partnership between the Universities of Michigan and Oxford and the publisher ProQuest to create accurately transcribed and encoded texts based on the image sets published by ProQuest via their Early English Books Online (EEBO) database (http://eebo.chadwyck.com). The general aim of EEBO-TCP is to encode one copy (usually the first edition) of every monographic English-language title published between 1473 and 1700 available in EEBO. EEBO-TCP aimed to produce large quantities of textual data within the usual project restraints of time and funding, and therefore chose to create diplomatic transcriptions (as opposed to critical editions) with light-touch, mainly structural encoding based on the Text Encoding Initiative (http://www.tei-c.org). The EEBO-TCP project was divided into two phases. The 25,363 texts created during Phase 1 of the project have been released into the public domain as of 1 January 2015. Anyone can now take and use these texts for their own purposes, but we respectfully request that due credit and attribution is given to their original source. Users should be aware of the process of creating the TCP texts, and therefore of any assumptions that can be made about the data. Text selection was based on the New Cambridge Bibliography of English Literature (NCBEL). If an author (or for an anonymous work, the title) appears in NCBEL, then their works are eligible for inclusion. Selection was intended to range over a wide variety of subject areas, to reflect the true nature of the print record of the period. In general, first editions of a works in English were prioritized, although there are a number of works in other languages, notably Latin and Welsh, included and sometimes a second or later edition of a work was chosen if there was a compelling reason to do so. Image sets were sent to external keying companies for transcription and basic encoding. Quality assurance was then carried out by editorial teams in Oxford and Michigan. 5% (or 5 pages, whichever is the greater) of each text was proofread for accuracy and those which did not meet QA standards were returned to the keyers to be redone. After proofreading, the encoding was enhanced and/or corrected and characters marked as illegible were corrected where possible up to a limit of 100 instances per text. Any remaining illegibles were encoded as <gap>s. Understanding these processes should make clear that, while the overall quality of TCP data is very good, some errors will remain and some readable characters will be marked as illegible. Users should bear in mind that in all likelihood such instances will never have been looked at by a TCP editor. The texts were encoded and linked to page images in accordance with level 4 of the TEI in Libraries guidelines. Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Family -- Religious life. 2007-08 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2007-10 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2007-11 Elspeth Healey Sampled and proofread 2007-11 Elspeth Healey Text and markup reviewed and edited 2008-02 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion B'ethel : OR A forme for families , in which all sorts of both sexes , are soe squarde , and framde by the word , as they may best serue in theire seuerall places , for usefull peices in God's buildinge . By Mathew Griffith , Wee are labourers together with God. 1. Corinth's . 3. 9. London Printed , for Ro : Allott and Hen : Taunton And Are to be sold at their shops at the Black beare in Paules Churchyard & in St. Dunsons Churchyard Fleet streete 1634. 
A27012	----	Mr. Baxters rules & directions for family duties shewing how every one ought to behave himself in a Christian behaviour, suitable to that relation in which God hath placed him : wherein is set forth the duty of parents (required of God) towards their children, likewise childrens duty to their parents, husbands to their wives, and wives to their husbands, masters to their servants, and servants duty to their masters ... Baxter, Richard, 1615-1691. 1681 Approx. 16 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 3 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2006-02 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A27012 Wing B1379 ESTC R6732 12324373 ocm 12324373 59513 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A27012) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 59513) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 201:15) Mr. Baxters rules & directions for family duties shewing how every one ought to behave himself in a Christian behaviour, suitable to that relation in which God hath placed him : wherein is set forth the duty of parents (required of God) towards their children, likewise childrens duty to their parents, husbands to their wives, and wives to their husbands, masters to their servants, and servants duty to their masters ... Baxter, Richard, 1615-1691. 1 sheet ([1] p.) Printed by H. Brugis for J. Conyers ..., [S.l.] : [1681] Extract from the "Christian Directory". Cf. BM. Date of publication from Wing. Imperfect: bottom of page cropped. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. EEBO-TCP is a partnership between the Universities of Michigan and Oxford and the publisher ProQuest to create accurately transcribed and encoded texts based on the image sets published by ProQuest via their Early English Books Online (EEBO) database (http://eebo.chadwyck.com). The general aim of EEBO-TCP is to encode one copy (usually the first edition) of every monographic English-language title published between 1473 and 1700 available in EEBO. EEBO-TCP aimed to produce large quantities of textual data within the usual project restraints of time and funding, and therefore chose to create diplomatic transcriptions (as opposed to critical editions) with light-touch, mainly structural encoding based on the Text Encoding Initiative (http://www.tei-c.org). The EEBO-TCP project was divided into two phases. The 25,363 texts created during Phase 1 of the project have been released into the public domain as of 1 January 2015. Anyone can now take and use these texts for their own purposes, but we respectfully request that due credit and attribution is given to their original source. Users should be aware of the process of creating the TCP texts, and therefore of any assumptions that can be made about the data. Text selection was based on the New Cambridge Bibliography of English Literature (NCBEL). If an author (or for an anonymous work, the title) appears in NCBEL, then their works are eligible for inclusion. Selection was intended to range over a wide variety of subject areas, to reflect the true nature of the print record of the period. In general, first editions of a works in English were prioritized, although there are a number of works in other languages, notably Latin and Welsh, included and sometimes a second or later edition of a work was chosen if there was a compelling reason to do so. Image sets were sent to external keying companies for transcription and basic encoding. Quality assurance was then carried out by editorial teams in Oxford and Michigan. 5% (or 5 pages, whichever is the greater) of each text was proofread for accuracy and those which did not meet QA standards were returned to the keyers to be redone. After proofreading, the encoding was enhanced and/or corrected and characters marked as illegible were corrected where possible up to a limit of 100 instances per text. Any remaining illegibles were encoded as <gap>s. Understanding these processes should make clear that, while the overall quality of TCP data is very good, some errors will remain and some readable characters will be marked as illegible. Users should bear in mind that in all likelihood such instances will never have been looked at by a TCP editor. The texts were encoded and linked to page images in accordance with level 4 of the TEI in Libraries guidelines. Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Family -- Early works to 1800. Christian life -- Early works to 1800. Broadsides -- England -- 17th century. 2005-07 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2005-09 Apex CoVantage Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2005-11 Emma (Leeson) Huber Sampled and proofread 2005-11 Emma (Leeson) Huber Text and markup reviewed and edited 2006-01 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion Mr. BAXTERS Rules & Directions for Family Duties . Shewing how every one ought to behave himself in a Christian behaviour , suitable to that Relation in which God hath placed him . Wherein is set forth the duty of Parents ( required of God ) towards their Children ; likewise Childrens duty to their Parents . Husbands to their Wives , and Wives to their Husbands . Masters to Servants , and Servants duty to their Masters . A work of great use , the serious practise thereof would establish peace and prosperity in all Families , and promote the power of godliness throughout the Nation . And necessary to be set up in every House . Josh . 24. chap. 15. ver . As for mee and my House , we will serve the Lord , Psal . 50. 23. To him that ordereth his Conversation aright , will I shew the Salvation of the Lord. The Obligations and duty of Parents required of God towards their Children , in their Educating of them in godliness . BE sure in the first place , that you do your part in entring them at first into the Baptismal Covenant ; 1. See that you be true to your Covenant your self , for the promise is made to the true Christians and their Seed , Eph. 2 Ch. 13. Gen. 17 Ch. 4. 13. 14. 2ly , Do not think that his Bare being the Child of godly Parents , is his full condition of Right to the benefits of the Covenant , that is but the Fundamental part ; but you must Actually dedicate him to God in Baptism , ( Deut. 29. ch . 11. 12. ver . Rom. 11 ch . 16 , John 3. ch . 2. 5. ) The child of a Believer actually offered or dedicated to God , is a rightfull Receiver of Baptism and its benefits . 3ly . Teach them therefore to know what Covenant they have made , and then cease not till you have brought them heartily to consent to it at Age themselves : and then bring them to the Minister of the Church , that he may Solemnly own the Covenant made in his Baptism , and so may be Admitted into the Number of Adult Communicating Members in a regular way . Teach them the words of the Covenant , 2 Tim. 1 ch . 13. and also the Creed , the Lords Prayer , and the Commandements , and the Catechism , teach them the meaning of them , and the way of practising all labour to possess them with the greatest Reverence of God and the Holy Scriptures : then shew them the Word of God , for all that you would teach them to know or do . 2ly . Never speak to them of God and Holy things , but with the greatest gravity and reverence : for if they are used once to slight , or jest , or play with Holy things , they are hardened and undone . Use often to take an Account of what they know and what they do , both in their open and secret practise ; leave them not carelesly to themselves , but narrowly watch over them . 3ly . Use all your skill and diligence by word and deed to make a Holy Life appear to them , as it is the most honourable , profitable , safe , and pleasant life in the world , that it may be their constant delight ; make good things pleasant to them , keep them from feeling Religion as Burthensom , or unpleasant , or a needless thing . First , begin with the easiest parts , as Scripture Histories , and then Church Histories : let them read the Lives of Holy Men , written by Mr. Samuel Clark and his Martyroligy , and the Lives of Mr. Bolton , and Mr. Joseph Allir , Mr. Janeway ; Dr. Beards Theatre of Gods Judgments , speak much to them of the praise of Ancient and latter Holy men ; be much in opening to them the Riches of Grace , and the joyes of glory : exercise them much in Psalms and praising God ; let your discourse with them be much in the disgrace of Sensuality , Pride , and wordlyness : tell them how Pride is the Devils sin , which cast him from Heaven , when others tell them of Riches , Honours , and Preferments , do you tell them these are the Devils baites to allure and steal thy Heart from God that they may be damned , make them often read , Luk 12 ch . 16. 18. ver Jam. 14 ch . 5. ver . Rom. 8 ch . 12. ver . Matt. 5 ch . 21. 6. ver . Wisely break them of their own Wills , and let them know that they must obey and like Gods Will and yours . Let their Apparell be plain and decent , not gaudy ; be sure when they come to years of ripen , that you keep them from opportunity , nearness , or familiarity with tempting Persons of another Sex. Be sure you ingage your Children in good Company , and keep them as much as possible out of bad : wicked Children will infact them before you are aware , as to drink , to swear , to game , to talk filthily , to lying , and to make a mock of godliness and Sobriety . Teach them to know the value of precious time , and the shortness of this Life , and to set death still before their eyes ; use them to read good Books , let your correction of them be wisely used as they need it , not too severely as to disaffect them to you , nor so little as to leave them in a course of sin and disobedience , let it be alwayes in love . Pray earnestly for them , and commit them by Faith to Christ , into whose Covenant you did ingage them . Go before them by a holy Life : let your practice tell them what you would have them be , especially in representing godliness delightful , and in living in the joyful hopes of Heaven . Choose such Trades for them that have least dangerous temptations , and when marriagable , provide such for them as are truly Suitable , and stay not till Lust and Folly insnate them . These are the Counsels which I earnestly recommend to you in this important work , for your Childrens Souls are so precious , and the difference between the good and bad so great , that all this must not seem too much , for I take the due Education of Children for the needfullest and excellent work in the world , especially for Mothers . The duties of Husbands to their Wives , and Wives to their Husbands . THe Common duty of Husband and Wife is to love each other , ( Eph. 5 ch . 25. ver . Husbands love your Wives even as Christ loved his Church , ) and therefore choose one that is truly , lovely , and proceed in your choice , with great deliberation , and avoid all things as tend to quench Love. 2ly . Dwell together and enjoy each other , 1 Cor. 7 ch . 29. ver . and faithfully joyn together in the Education of your Children , the government of your Family , and the management of your worldly business . 3ly . Especially to be helpers of each others salvation , to stir up each other to Faith , Love , and Obedience , and good works , to warn and help each other against sin and all temptations , to joyn in Gods worship in the Family and in private , to prepare each other for the approach of Death , and comfort each other in the hopes of life eternal . 4ly . To avoid all dissentions , and to bear with those Infirmities in each other which you cannot cure : to asswage , and not to provoke unruly passions , and in lawful things to please each other . 5ly . To keep continual Chastity and fidelity , and to avoid all unseemly and immodest carriage with any other , which may stir up jealousie , and yet to avoid jealousie which is unjust . 6ly . To help each other to bear their burthens ( and not by Impatience to make them greater ) in poverty , crosses , sickness , and dangers , to comfort and to support each other , and to be delightful Companions in Holy Love and Heavenly hopes and duties , when all other outward comforts faile . The more special duties of Husbands are to exercise Love and Authority together , ( never seperated ) to his Wife . 2ly . To be chief teacher and governour of the Family , and provider for its maintainance , to excell the Wife in Knowledge and Patience , and to be her Teacher and guide in the matters of God , and to keep up the Wives Authority & Honour in the Family over inferiors . The special duties of Wives are , to excell in Love , and 2ly . Be obedient to their Husbands , and examples therein to the rest of the Family , submissively to learn of their Husbands , ( that can teach them ) and not to be self conceited , talktive , or imperious , to subdue their passions , not to tempt their Husband to satisfie their vain desire in Pride , Excess , Revenge , or any evil ; not to rob God and the poor by a proud wastfull humour . 5ly . To govern their Tongues , that their words be few , and grave , and sober . 6ly . To be contented in every condition , to avoid the Childish vanity of gaudy Apparel , and following of vain fashions of the prouder sort . 7ly . To help on the maintainance of the family by frugality , not to dispose of her Husbands Estate without his consent . 8ly . Above all to be constant helpers for the Holy Education of their Children ; for this is the most eminent Service that women can do in the world ; she must daily Catechise them , and teach them to know God , and mind them of the world to come , and teach them to pray . The duty of Children to Parents IS to love them dearly , and to be thankfull for all that love & care which they can never requite , 2ly . to learn of them submisively , especially the Doctrine of salvation . 3ly . To obey them diligently in all lawful things in obedience to God. 4ly . To honour them in thought , words , and actions , and to avoid all appearance of slighting , dishonour , and contempt . 5ly . To be contented with their Parents Allowance and Provisions , and willing and ready to such labour or imployment as they command them . 6ly . To take patiently the reprooffs and corrections of their Parents , and to confess their faults with humble penitence , and to amend . 7ly . To use such company as their Parents command them , and not to run into the company of vain and tempting persons . 8ly . To be content with such a Calling as their Parents choose for them . 9ly . To marry by their Parents choice or consent only . 10ly . To relieve their Parents if they need . Gen. 9. ch . 22. Prov. 30 ch . 17. 13. 24. Prov. 6 ch . 20 ver . Col. 3 ch . 20 ver . A short prayer for Children . LEt thy blessing O Lord , be upon my Parents and Governours , cause them to instruct and Educate me in thy fear , cause mee with thankfulness to receive their instruction , and to love , honour , and obey them in obedience to thee : keep mee from the snares of evil Company , Temptations , and yotuhful pleasures , and let mee be a companion of those that fear God ; let my daily delight be to meditate on thy Law , and let me never have the mark of the ungodly , to be a Lover of Pleasure more than of God ; furnish my Youth with those Treasures of Wisdom and Holiness which may be daily increased and used to thy Glory . All this I beg and hope for on the account and merits of Jesus Christ my Saviour , saying , as he hath taught me , Our Father which art in Heaven , hallowed be thy Name , &c. The duty of Masters towards their Servants . IS to rule them with that gentleness as becometh fellow Christians , and yet with such Authority , as that they be not encouraged to contempt . 2ly . To restrain them from sinning against God. 3ly . To instruct them in the Doctrine of Salvation , and pray with them , and go before them by the example of a sober life . 4ly . To keep them from evil company , and temptations , and opportunity 〈◊〉 sinning . 5ly . To set them upon meet labours , to keep no idle Serving men , nor yet to over-labour them to the injury of their Health , nor command them any unlawfull thing . 6ly . To provide them such Food and Lodging as is wholesome and meet for them ; and to pay them what Wages is due to them by promise or desert . 7ly . To bear patiently with their daily infirmities , and such frailties as must be expected in mankind , Eph. 6 ch . 9. 10 ver . Col. 4. ch . 12. 3. ver . The duty of Servants to their Masters . FIrst , to honour and reverence them , and obey them in all lawful things belonging to their places to command , and to avoid all words and carriage , which savour of dishonour , contempt , or disobedience . 2ly . To perform all labour willingly which they undertake , and is required of them , and that without grudging : and to be as faithful behind their Masters backs as before their faces . 3ly . To be trusty in word and deed , and abhor lying and deceit , not to wrong their Masters in buying or selling , or by stealing any thing that is theirs , no not meat nor drink against their Will : but being as thrifty and carefull for their Masters profit , as if it were their own , not to murmer at the means of ●ood that is wholesome , nor to desire a life of fulness , ease , and idleness . 5ly . To be more careful to do their duty to their Masters , then how their Masters shall use them , because ●in is worse than suffering . 6ly . Not to reveale the Secrets of the Family abroad , to Strangers or Neighbours . 7ly . Thankfully to receive Instructions , and to learn God's word , and to observe the Lords day , and seriously joyn in publick and private worshipping of God. 8ly . To bear patiently reprooff and due correction , and to confess faults and to amend . 9ly . To pray daily for a blessing on the Family , on their labours and themselves . 10ly . To do all this in true obedience to God , expecting their reward from him , 1 Pet. 2. ch . 18. Tit. 2 ch . 9. ver . 1 Tim. 6 chap. 12 ver . Col. 3 ch . 22. 2● Eph. 6 ch . 5 ver . Matt. 10 ch . 24 ver . The Servants Prayer . O Lord , as thou hast made mee a Servant , make mee co●sionable and faithful in my place , trusty and carefull 〈◊〉 my Masters Goods and business , as I would be if it 〈◊〉 my own ; make me submissive and obedient to my govern●● 〈◊〉 keep mee from Self-will and Pride , from murmuring and 〈◊〉 iterant speeches , from falshood sloathfulness & all deceit , that 〈◊〉 be not an Eye Servant pleasing my Lust & fleshly Appetite 〈◊〉 may chearfully and willingly do my duty , as believing that 〈◊〉 art the revenger of all unfaithfulness and may 〈…〉 not only as unto man , but as unto the Lord , expecting from 〈◊〉 my chief reward . All this I beg on the account of the 〈◊〉 of my dear Saviour Jesus Christ , concluding in the 〈…〉 hath taught us , Our father which art in Heaven , &c. Printed by 〈◊〉 for J. Conyers in Duck lane , 〈…〉 There is lately Printed a most exellent sheet , called Si●●s Groans , or The distressed State of the 〈◊〉 Church . 
A47028	----	A sermon of the absolute necessity of family-duties preached to the united parishes of St. Mary Woolnoth & St. Mary Woolchurch-Haw in Lombard-Street / by David Jones ... Jones, David, 1663-1724? 1692 Approx. 65 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 20 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2007-10 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A47028 Wing J936 ESTC R11711 12715585 ocm 12715585 66181 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A47028) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 66181) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 358:18) A sermon of the absolute necessity of family-duties preached to the united parishes of St. Mary Woolnoth & St. Mary Woolchurch-Haw in Lombard-Street / by David Jones ... Jones, David, 1663-1724? [1], 35, [1] p. Printed for Thomas Parkhurst ... and Brab. Aylmer ..., London : 1692. Reproduction of original in Huntington Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. EEBO-TCP is a partnership between the Universities of Michigan and Oxford and the publisher ProQuest to create accurately transcribed and encoded texts based on the image sets published by ProQuest via their Early English Books Online (EEBO) database (http://eebo.chadwyck.com). The general aim of EEBO-TCP is to encode one copy (usually the first edition) of every monographic English-language title published between 1473 and 1700 available in EEBO. EEBO-TCP aimed to produce large quantities of textual data within the usual project restraints of time and funding, and therefore chose to create diplomatic transcriptions (as opposed to critical editions) with light-touch, mainly structural encoding based on the Text Encoding Initiative (http://www.tei-c.org). The EEBO-TCP project was divided into two phases. The 25,363 texts created during Phase 1 of the project have been released into the public domain as of 1 January 2015. Anyone can now take and use these texts for their own purposes, but we respectfully request that due credit and attribution is given to their original source. Users should be aware of the process of creating the TCP texts, and therefore of any assumptions that can be made about the data. Text selection was based on the New Cambridge Bibliography of English Literature (NCBEL). If an author (or for an anonymous work, the title) appears in NCBEL, then their works are eligible for inclusion. Selection was intended to range over a wide variety of subject areas, to reflect the true nature of the print record of the period. In general, first editions of a works in English were prioritized, although there are a number of works in other languages, notably Latin and Welsh, included and sometimes a second or later edition of a work was chosen if there was a compelling reason to do so. Image sets were sent to external keying companies for transcription and basic encoding. Quality assurance was then carried out by editorial teams in Oxford and Michigan. 5% (or 5 pages, whichever is the greater) of each text was proofread for accuracy and those which did not meet QA standards were returned to the keyers to be redone. After proofreading, the encoding was enhanced and/or corrected and characters marked as illegible were corrected where possible up to a limit of 100 instances per text. Any remaining illegibles were encoded as <gap>s. Understanding these processes should make clear that, while the overall quality of TCP data is very good, some errors will remain and some readable characters will be marked as illegible. Users should bear in mind that in all likelihood such instances will never have been looked at by a TCP editor. The texts were encoded and linked to page images in accordance with level 4 of the TEI in Libraries guidelines. Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Family -- Biblical teaching. Sermons, English -- 17th century. 2005-12 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2005-12 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2006-11 Taryn Hakala Sampled and proofread 2006-11 Taryn Hakala Text and markup reviewed and edited 2007-02 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion A SERMON Of the Absolute Necessity of Family-Duties , Preached to the UNITED PARISHES OF St. Mary Woolnoth , & St. Mary Woolchurch-Haw IN LOMBARD-STREET . By DAVID JONES Student of Christ-Church . Oxon. JER . 10. 25. Pour out thy Fury upon the Heathen that know thee not , and upon the Families that call not upon thy Name : For they have Eaten up Jacob , and Devoured him , and Consumed him , and have made his Habitation desolate . LONDON , Printed for Thomas Parkhurst at the Bible and Three Crowns in Cheap-side ; and Brab . Aylmer at the Three Pigeons in Corn-hill , 1692. Josh . 24. 15. If it seem evil to you to serve the Lord , chuse you this day whom you will Serve : But , as for me and my House , we will Serve the Lord. THese words were spoken by Joshua to the Children of Israel ; and they do acquaint us , First of all , That the Service of God may have a great many Prejudices and Objections rais'd against it : For , It may seem evil to some Men to serve the Lord. Secondly , They inform us , that though the Service of God may have so many Prejudices and Objections rais'd against it ; Yet , its Excellence is so far beyond all things in the World , that it may be safely put to any Mans Choice , whether he will serve God or no. The difference between Religion and Irreligion is so great , that no reasonable Man can be at a stand which to chuse : God is sure which way the choice will go . And therefore he says , Chuse you this day whom you will serve . And therefore they give us to understand , Thirdly , That , If notwithstanding the Excellence of Religion , Men will be so wilfully blind , as to chuse Irreligion before it ; Yet , it is the Duty of every Joshua , it is the Duty of every Master of a Family , to ingage both Himself and his Family , to serve God against all Opposition to the contrary . For , If it seem evil to you to serve the Lord , chuse you this day whom you will serve : But , as for me and my House , we will serve the Lord. These Three Heads of Discourse would take me up Four Sermons at least . And therefore , the next Lords-Day being the last time that I shall Preach from this place ; I shall now treat only of the last Proposition , which is most Vseful for , and most Neglected by most Men. In treating of which , I shall shew you from Joshua's Example , That , Every Master of a Family is indispensably bound in Conscience to bring up his Family in the Service of God. And the Reasons of this are such as these . First of all . The Law tells us , Deut. 20. 5. That every Man was bound to Dedicate , or to Consecrate , or to Sanctifie his House unto the Lord. And the reason of the thing tells us , that it being impossible to Sanctifie the Walls of a House , there being no Sanctification , properly so called , in Stone , Brick and Timber : Therefore , to Sanctifie a House unto the Lord , is nothing else , but to be careful for the Instruction of a Man's Family , and to bring it up in the Service of God ; that so , his House may be God's House , his Children God's Children , and his Servants God's Servants . For indeed , if a Man does not instruct his Family at Home all the Week long , their going to Church on the Lord's-day does them little or no good : For , the Master does them as much and more harm in his own House , than the Minister did them good in God's House . The Masters bad Example out-does the Preachers good Preaching , though he Preaches with the Tongues of Men and Angels . The Master 's customary Swearing and Drinking , and Cheating in his way of Trade , every Day in the Week , out-does a little short florid Sermon , only once or twice a Week . And that too perhaps , design'd only to please a few itching Ears , and not to sink down deep enough , and to work upon their Hearts and Consciences . The Masters neglect of Family-Duties which the Minister presses so home , and upon his Conscience in Church , makes the Servant imagin , that the Minister is some Precise , Rigid Puritan , that would fain oblige Men to such things as God never obliged them to . For else says the Servant , My Master who is reckon'd such a Grave , Prudent and Just Man in all other things , would never be so unjust to God , as to deny him the small Tribute of Family-Duties , if he thought they were any way due to him . And by this means , the Master infects his Servant , and the Servant infects his Servant when he has one ; and so on to the end of the World. And thus , as I take it , the case now stands at this present time ; I would to God I were mistaken in it ! This Evil of neglecting Family-Duties , is come to so great a Head , that partly by the strength of Custom and Prescription , which some Men impudently pretend for it : Partly , by the General corruption of Manners : And Partly , for want of frequent and affectionate Preaching against it , it will be a very hard matter to convince Men of their Duty in this case . And therefore , notwithstanding it is my usual way to spend much time in the Application of my Discourses to the Hearts of Men , yet at this time , I shall be forced to apply my self wholly to your Judgments , by endeavouring to Convince them of the Absolute Necessity of Family-Duties , without ever applying my self to raise and to stir up your Affections , which must be reserved to some other opportunity , and some other Hand . Secondly The Character that God gave Abraham was this : I know him ; that is , I approve of him , I commend him for what I know in him : I know him that he will command his Children and his Houshold after him , and they shall keep the way of the Lord to do Justice and Judgment , Gen. 18. 19. This was one of our Father Abraham's greatest Commendations . And therefore without all doubt , it made up the greatest , or at least , a very considerable part of his bounden Duty and Service . And therefore also , if ever we will be the true Sons of our Father Abraham , We must do the Works of our Father Abraham ; and among the rest , we are more especially bound to do this Work of his , we are to command our Children and our Houshold after us . We are to take care for them against that time , when we shall be dead and gone , lest our Memory should Stink and Rot among Men. We are in our Life-time to take care what shall become of them after our Death . We are to command them to keep the way of the Lord , to do Justice and Judgment . And we are to bring them up in the Service of God. And therefore we find , that when Christ had converted Zaccheus , he said , This day is Salvation come to this House , forasmuch as he also is the Son of Abraham , Luke 19. 9. Mark it all you Masters of Families : Christ does not say , this Day is Salvation come to this Man Himself : But , it is come to this Man's House also ; his whole House , as well as himself was to be saved by his Salvation . And if you would know the reason of it , he tells you in the very next Words , that the reason of it was this ; The Master of that House was the Son of Abraham ; and therefore , he was bound to bring up his Family in the Service of God , as his Father Abraham had done before him . For , if Peter , or any one else that is Chief or Head of a Place , do fall away from his Duty ; then , others also ; yea , a very Barnabas himself will be drawn away too . And therefore , tho he himself discharge his own Duty well enough ; yet , if he takes not care , that all under him discharge theirs also , he is guilty of their Sin. God never increaseth a Man's Family , but at the same time he increaseth his Charge and his Care too . It is not enough for a Master of a Family to do the Duty of a Man ; but he must also do the Duty of a Master of a Family . And thus , it is not enough for a Constable , or a Church-warden , or a Justice of Peace to do the Duty of a Master of a Family , and to look after his own Affairs at home ; but he must also do the respective Duties of Constable , Church-warden , or Justice of Peace . Thirdly . The Fourth Commandment commands every Master of a Family to take care of his Son and Daughter ; his Man-Servant and Maid-Servant ; yea , and even of the very Cattle and Strangers that are within his Gates , that is , within his Jurisdiction or Protection . And certainly ; That God , who commands every Master of a Family to take care of his Servants , does much more command him to take care of his Children . And that God , who commands every Master of a Family to take care of his Cattle and his Strangers , that is , his Lodgers and his Sojourners , does much more command him to take care of his Servants . For , a Christian Servant is really more than a Servant , he is above a Servant , he is a Brother beloved , Philem. 16. Yea rather , There is no difference between either Bond or Free : for , we are all but one in Christ Jesus , Gal. 3. 28. Fourthly . Every Master of a Family is bound to do as much Good as he can in his Generation : Or , as the Scripture speaketh , of the Patriarch David , he is bound to serve his Generation . And whoever that Master of a Family is , who does not bring up his Family in the Service of God , he does not bring it up to serve his Generation : But , he is so far from serving it , that he does it all the Disservice imaginable . For , as Aristotle observeth in his Politicks , Families are the first Societies in Nature , and they are the Ground and Original of all the rest . Families are the Nurseries and the Seminaries of a Common-wealth . They are the same to a Kingdom , that a Fountain is to the Streams that flow from it : Or that a Cause is to the Effects that come from it . And as the Streams can never be good when the Fountain is bad ; and as the Effects can never be good when the Cause is bad : So likewise , No Kingdom can ever be good as long as the Families of the Earth are out of course . And therefore , the best , and indeed , the only way to make Godly Parishes , and Godly Countries , and Godly Kingdoms , is , to being where we ought to begin . It is in the first place , To make Godly Families . And therefore , a Minister is not only bound to Teach his People in Publick , but he is also to Teach them in Private : He is not only to go and meet them in God's House , but he is also to go and meet them in their own Houses , if he may be admitted without any extraordinary Rudeness offered to his Person and Message : He is to go from House to House , and to set up a Godly , and a Strict Discipline in their Families . And let no Man imagin that he has not Authority enough to do this . For , St. Paul did it , Acts 20. 20. And what he did , is written for our instruction , that we might do so too . Assure your selves , Every Minister has as much Power to demand God's Rent out of every House , that is , to call them to an account for the Improvement of their Spiritual Talents , as any Gentleman's Steward has to call for , and demand his Masters Rents from his Tenants , Matth. 21. 24. And Wo be to Us if we do not exercise this Power ! And Wo be to them that will not suffer us to put it in Execution ! But serve us , as those Wicked and Barbarous Husbandmen served the Lord's Servants , who went to demand the Fruits of their Lord's Vineyard , either beat us , or stone us , or kill us , or send us away empty , and cast us out of the Vineyard , ver . 35 , 39. From the Families it is , that Vertue or Vice , a good or a bad Example , does first arise , and spead it self both far and near . And therefore , the Families are to be carefully looked after in the first place . One Atheistical Family is enough to infect the whole Neighbourhood . It sendeth a Son into one House , a Daughter into another , a Servant into another , and some Body or other almost into every House . And every one of them , like so many infected Persons , do poyson and infect all those with whom they converse . But what do I say , that one Atheistical Family is enough to infect the whole Neighbourhood ? When it is plain , That One Man , One Jeroboam , is enough to infect the whole Church and State , and to make all Israel to sin , even for many Ages after his Death . One Achan troubled all Israel , and brought a severe Judgment upon them all by his own single Trespass , Josh . 7. throughout the Chapter . One incestuous Corinthian made all the Church of Corinth to be puffed up , and involved them all in his Fault , because they had him not Excommunicated , 1 Cor. 5. 2. One infected Member infects all the rest . And we Christians are all of us but so many Members one of another : And therefore , The care of one , ought to reach to , and affect us all , Rom. 12. 5. 15. Fifthly , No Master of a Family can have any Assurance of his own Goodness , unless he endeavour to make all his Family good as well as himself . He can have no sure sign of Grace in himself , unless he endeavour to make all about him to grow in Grace . For , even Nature teacheth us , that if a Needle be but touched with a Loadstone , it will draw others along with it . And the very Birds of the Air teach us the same Lesson . And why should not I send you to them for Instruction , as Solomon sends the Sluggard to the Ant for Good Husbandry ? The very Birds of the Air teach us the same Lesson : For , they no sooner find a little heap of Corn themselves , but they presently Chirp and call their Fellows to come and partake with them . And therefore we find , that God does frequently make this to be the mark of a sound Christian that is himself thoroughly Converted , when his Care reacheth unto his Family , and he endeavours to Convert that as well as himself . For , the Mark of Abraham's goodness was , that he would command his Children and his Houshold after him . The Mark of Joshua's goodness was , that he and his House would serve the Lord against all Opposition . The Mark of Zaccheus his goodness was , that he would save his House as well as himself . The Mark of Cornelius the Centurion's goodness was , that he was a Devout Man , and one that Feared God with all his House . The Mark of Lydia and the Jaylor's goodness was , that they and their Housholds were Baptized . The Mark of Crispus the chief Ruler of the Synagogue's goodness was , that he believed on the Lord , with all his House . Yea , and the Mark of the Noble-Man of Capernaum's goodness was , that he himself believed and his whole House . Neither Men nor Women , neither Rich nor Poor , neither Noble-Men , nor Rulers , nor Jaylors , no , nor yet the very Soldiers of those Times , thought it below them to look after , and to instruct their Families in the Fear of God. Yea , and Holy David , though he were a King , did not think it below him to perform the same good Office to his Family ▪ For , so careful was he upon this account , that he has left us the whole 101 Psalm as a Pattern for all Masters of Families to walk by . And yet alas ! How much is this Duty neglected by all sorts of Men now-a-days , which was heretofore so much , if not Vniversally Practic'd . But however , let the neglect of it be what it will , yet sure it is , if thou dost not do all thou canst to make thy whole House good as well as thy self , thou hast no good Assurance that thou thy self art a good Man. And therefore we find in Exod. 12. 48. That no Proselyte might presume to come to the Passover , unless his whole House as well as himself were Circumcised , and professed the Jewish Religion . And how few then should now come to the holy Sacrament , if this Law , as well as its Equity were still in force ? And we find also , that God would have Killed Moses in the Inn , in his way to Egypt , because he had not Circumcised his Son , Exod. 4. 24. The great Concern of his Embassage , and the great Haste it requir'd , could not possibly have prevented his Death , if his Wife had not presently Circumcised his Son. God never trusts them with any Publick Affairs , who are negligent in their Private Capacities . And we find further in Deut. 30. 2 , 3. That the Israelites had no hope of ever returning from Captivity , unless their Children as well as themselves would return unto the Lord , and obey his Voice . But these you 'll say , are all of them Old Testament Proofs ; and what do those affect you who are not under the Severe Discipline of a School-Masters Rod , but the Milder Dispensation of the Gospel of Christ ? But thanks be to God for it , neither Christ nor his Gospel do in the least disingage you from Family Duties , but do rather much more Confirm and Establish them . For , St. Paul is express , 1 Tim. 3. 4 , 5. That no Man may be made a Bishop or a Priest , but one that ruleth well his own House , having his Children in Subjection with all Gravity . For , if a Man know not how to Rule his own House , how shall he take care of the Church of God ? Nay , and what 's a great deal more than all this , St. Paul tell us plainly , 1 Tim. 5. 8. That if any provide not for his own , though they be abroad and gone from him ; and especially for those of his own House , that are at Home with him , he hath denied the Faith , and is worse than an Infidel . And if a Man have denied the Faith , and be worse than an Infidel , that does not provide Food and Raiment for his Family , and take care for the welfare of their Bodies only : How bad then is that Man that does not provide for the Souls of his Family ? For , is it not worse to starve the Soul , than to starve the Body ? And is not Eternal Death far worse than Temporal Death ? And are not the Gnawings of the never-Dying Worm , far more intolerable , than the cravings of an Empty Stomach ? Certainly , as much as the Soul exceeds the Body , so much the worse is that Man that neglects the Souls of his Family , than he that neglects their Bodies . And yet , if he that only neglects their Bodies , have denied the Faith , and be worse than an Infidel : Then judge you your selves , what Name is bad enough for that Man that neglects their Souls ? And now , let any Master of a Family , that does not bring up his House in the Service of God , tell Me and this Congregation , how he can pretend to be a Christian , when St. Paul tells him here to his Face , that he hath denied the Faith , and is worse than an Infidel . And if any of you shall be pleased to call me Rash , Censorious , Positive , Peremptory , and I know not what , for passing such a severe Judgment upon you that are guilty of this Sin , ( if any of you are guilty of it , ) do but remember it is not my Judgment , but St. Paul's : And then , if you must needs find fault , find fault with him ; and let him answer for it , and not I. And with Him , not to say with Us , It is a very small thing that we should be judged of You , or of Mans judgment : He that judgeth us is the Lord , 1 Cor. 4. 3 , 4. And therefore , do you say what you will , I do conclude notwithstanding , that no Master of a Family can have any Assurance of his own Faith ; for , he hath denyed that : and consequently , he can have no Assurance of his own Salvation neither , unless he endeavour to make all his Family good as well as himself . He can have no sure sign of Grace in himself , unless he endeavour to make all about him to grow in Grace . Sixthly . A Bad Master of a Family makes all his Family bad ; or at least , he is not wanting on his part , as far as his bad Example will go . An Adulterous Master makes all his Family to serve his Lust , and prompts them to Uncleanness . A Drunken , Swearing Master , provokes all his Family to give themselves to Drinking and Swearing : And a Covetous Master brings the very Root of all Evil into his Family , and infects them all with a stingy penurious Humour , which Eats up the very Vitals and Bowels of Christianity . And shall not a good Master of a Family be as careful to make his Family good , as a bad Master is to make his Family bad ? Shall not the good be as true to God , as the bad is to the Devil ? Shall not Heaven ingage the good to make as many Converts , as Hell does ingage the Bad ? And shall not everlasting Joys be as strong and prevailing Motives , as everlasting Torments ? Oh how will the Devil insult over thee for this at the day of Judgment ! How will he then Accuse thee for this , which he now provokes thee to , and commends thee for ! And how will he then upbraid thee for having promoted his Kingdom of Darkness , more than thou didst the Kingdom of Christ ? Me , thinks I hear , and I even tremble to hear him Plead against thee after some such manner as this ! This Man was thine by Creation , O'Christ ; but he has made himself mine by his own Choice : He was thine whether he would or no ; he could not hinder his Creation ; but he became mine by his own voluntary Act and Deed. Thou didst Redeem him ; but he presently sold himself to me for a trifle , for nothing , for worse than nothing ; for Death , for Eternal Death . Thou didst Dye for him ; but he served me , and lived and died in my Service ; in the drudgery and slavery of Sin. And yet for all this , I gave him nothing , and I promised him nothing , save only the burden of a Surseit , or the vanity of Fame , or the filthy pleasure of a Night , or the joys of Madness , or the delights of a Disease , or the comfortable entertainment of Horror , Anguish and Despair . I never Sweated great Drops of Blood for him ; I never Hanged upon the Cross for him ; only , when he was thine by the merit of thy precious Death , he became mine by his own base Ingratitude . He Swore in his Baptism to be thy Soldier , and he has forsworn himself a Thousand times over to Fight my Battles . He ought to have made his House a Houshold of Faith , but he has made it a Den of Thieves , and a Cage of every unclean thing . None of my Servants do serve me thus : My Servants are all true and faithful to me ; they take care that nothing be seen or heard in their Houses all the Year long , but Drinking , and Swearing , and Gaming , and Whoring , and Backbiting , and such like extravagant Frolicks . And yet , does this Master of a Family pretend to be thy Servant , and serve me all the while , and suffer his House to be full of all manner of Sinners , yea , and prefer Sinners to his Acquaintance , to his Table , to his Bosom , to his very Bed , before those which his own Conscience cannot but tell him to be good and honest Men. And this , or some such invidious Accusation , the Accuser of the Brethren , the Devil , will certainly bring against thee at the Day of Judgment . And therefore , as thou wouldst avoid it Then ; so , be thou Now sure to bring up thy Family in the Service of God : which is the only thing that will be able to stop the Devil's Mouth against thee at that great and terrible Day of the Lord. And here now I am presently aware of a Middling sort of Men , who are neither notorious ill Livers , nor notorious good Livers : Who neither drink nor swear , nor whore , nor keep any bad hours in their Families . And these Men content themselves with a Negative sort of Religion . They think it enough to eschew Evil , and they never think of doing Good. They think it enough to haue their Families at home , and to give them good ordinary Food and Raiment , and to keep them in pretty good Order for their Credit and their Trade's sake ; and they never think of providing for their Immortal Souls , for God's sake , tho they do much more deserve , and do much more stand in need of their utmost Assistance . They call them to an exact Account for every Farthing that they entrust them with ; and they never call them to any Account at all for those innumerable Talents that God hath committed to their Charge . They enquire of them diligently what News they have heard abroad ; and they never enquire of them what good Sermon they have heard at Church , and how much the better they are for having heard it . They ask them , whether such a strong Place , or such a Fortress be taken or surrendred ; and they never ask them whether such a Thorn be taken out of their Flesh , or such a Sin taken Captive , or such a Jericho demolished , or such a Lust mortified , or such earthly Members crucified to the Cross of Christ . They take on mightily , and lay on unmercifully , if they be not always at home to wait on them at their Tables , and they never are at all concern'd whether ever they wait at God's Table , and go to his Altar to receive the Blessed Sacrament . And thus these Middling Sort of Men do keep their Families at home indeed , but they do not make them do any good at home . They keep them from the grosser Acts of Sin , but they do not bring them up to Vertue . They keep them from Drinking , and Swearing , and Whoring , ( and 't were well if all would but do so much ) but they do not bring them up to Read and to Pray , and to sing Psalms ; and they do not instruct them in the Principles of Religion , by Catechizing them , and Reading and expounding the Scriptures to them , as far as they are able . Sure I am , These and such like Godly Exercises were constantly used in those Late Times , which some Men have learned to call Hypocritical . But how deservedly , let them look to it . For , none is able to distinguish a Hypocrite from an Honest Man , unless he can do as God does , Search the Heart . And if our Religion does not Exceed , yet , does not Equal , that of the Hypocrites , Good God , what will become of us ! Let us have a care lest our Portion be not as good as theirs ! Let us not deceive our selves ! The close Hypocrite does not do the Church of God so much Harm as the Profane Person . The Hypocrite commends Religion . For , none counterfeits that which is bad . But the Profane Person lives in open Defiance to it , and proclaims War against Heaven , and dares the Almighty to his Face . Ahab's Hypocritical Repentance procured him a great Temporal Blessing , even from God Himself . But we never read of any Blessing that God bestows upon a Man for his Profaneness . And therefore ▪ First of all , Do not thou call any Times Hypocritical . For , thou dost not know which are so , and which are not so . And then ▪ Secondly , Do not thou presume to neglect Family-Duties , because they were most practiced in those Times , which thou thinkest most Hypocritical . The very Hypocrite's Practice of them , both justifies and commends them . For , he is never at the pains to counterfeit ought but what is good . The Devil transforms himself only into an Angel of Light , or at least , something else that is better than himself . Let us not therefore thus pitifully deceive our selves any longer . The Hypocrite's practice of Family-Duties will not justifie , but condemn us , and aggravate our Condemnation for their Neglect . God neither is , nor will , nor can be mocked by you . Your Sins of Omission are damnable as well as your Sins of Commission . Your omitting Family-Duties is damnable , as well as your committing Family-Sins . Men shall be damned for doing Nothing , as well as for doing Somthing that is bad . Idleness is mortal as well as Sinfulness ▪ And the slothful Napkiner of his Talent is accountable for That , as well as he that spends his Estate upon Ease , Luxury and Pomp. Men shall be damned not only for Cheating , and Oppressing , and grinding the Face of the Poor ; but also , for not Assisting , and not Relieving the Poor ; for not giving them Meat , Drink , Cloathing and Lodging when they stand in need of it , as too many of them do in this cold Season of the Year , as you heard this Morning from His Majesty's Gracious Letter to the Lord Bishop and the Lord Mayor of London , on the behalf of the Poor in and about this City . Which I would have you all Effectually to lay to Heart . And therefore ▪ I beseech thee , yea , I beg of thee for Christ his sake , and for thine own sake too , that when thou hast taken so much care to keep thy self from Sins of Commission , do not suffer thy self to be damned for Sins of Omission . Thou that hast kept thy self from Doing Evil , do not suffer thy self to be undone for not doing Good. Thou that hast kept thy Family from Sin , do not suffer thy self to perish for not bringing it up to Vertue . It is the height of Misery to have watched for the Bridegroom till he was just coming , and then in the very nick of Time to fall asleep , and to be shut out for ever from the Marriage-Feast . It is the utmost disappointment to fall short of the Prize within a step of the Races end . There are Proverbs made on 't . 'T is a disappointment beyond Expression , beyond Thought , beyond all things , to go to the Devil in the sight of God , and to be tumbled into Hell from Heaven-Gates . And therefore , thou that hast taken so much care with thy Family , do not make thy self eternally miserable for not taking a little more care with it . Thou that hast gone so far , do not damn thy self for not going one step farther . Do not forfeit Heaven for one bad Action . Do not forfeit Eternity for nothing , for one Sin of Omission , the Omission of Family-Duties . Seventhly , Self-love and Self-preservation oblige a Man to bring up his Family in the Service of God , tho he himself has not God in all his Thoughts . For , Self-preservation obliges a Man to avoid a Pest-House , or an House infected with the Plague : It obliges him to avoid all violent Torments , such as the Rack , the Wheel , and the Gallows ; and it never makes him over-fond either of Sword , Fire , or Faggot . And yet , the very same Principle that obliges a Man to avoid these and such like fatal Messengers of God's Wrath , does much more oblige him to bring up his Family in the Service of God , and to empty his House of all Bad Livers . For , if thy Servant be sick of any Catching Distemper , dost not thou presently get him out of thy House , lest Thou , and thy Wife , and thy Children , and the rest of thy Family should catch that Distemper ? And yet , is there any Distemper half so catching , and half so mischievous , as that of Sin ? And wilt not thou then much more get rid of a Sinful , than a Sick Servant ? Especially , seeing all his Sickness is only the effect of his Sinfulness ; And it is Charity , and perhaps thy Duty , to entertain thy sick Servant , which thou art never bound to do to thy sinful Servant . Dost thou harbor a Company of Thieves or Robbers in thy House , if thou hast any thing by thee that is worth their stealing ? Dost thou harbor a Company of Adulterers or Fornicators in thy House , if thou hast either a Chaste Wife , or a Chaste Daughter , or a Chaste Maid living with thee ? And yet , wilt thou harbor a Company of Wicked Servants in thy House , that will rob thee of thy very Soul , and will bring the Curse and the Plague of God upon thee and all thy Family ? Yea , wilt thou harbor a Company of Incarnate Devils in thy House ? For , what our Saviour said of Judas , I have chosen Twelve Disciples , and behold one of them is a Devil , is but too true of every other Wicked Man , he is a Devil ; he is led , or rather violently hurried on , by the same Spirit that the Devil himself is led by . And art not thou afraid to keep a Company of Incarnate Devils in thy House , when a little Fire or Water , or a few Thieves shall be ready to make thee at thy Wits end ? Eighthly , Self-Interest obliges a Man to bring up his Family in the Service of God , though he himself careth not for God. And Interest certainly will do much in such a place as This , when all other things fail . Where Robbing of Orphans , Oppressing Widows , Grinding the Face of the Poor , Griping Vsury , and Suing out Pardons from the State for Extortion : Where these and such like abominable Sins do reign at such a rate ; certainly Interest , yea , the very Name of it , will pass for a stronger Argument than all the Power and Demonstration of the Spirit . And therefore , methinks , that this Place of all others should be most remarkable for Family-Duties , which advance their Interest even to an Hundred-fold . For , if a Man be bad himself , yet if he have but a good Servant , God will bless that bad Man for the sake of his good Servant . For , notwithstanding Potiphar was an Idolater , and notwithstanding his Wife was an Adultress , and would have committed a Rape upon her Chast Servant , that preferred the Members of Christ before the Members of such a Lewd Harlot : Notwithstanding all these Villanies that were enough to have undone a whole Kingdom , and much more one House : Yet still , the Holy Ghost is express , that the Lord blessed the Egyptians House for Joseph's sake . And again , The Lord blessed the House of Obed-Edom , for the Arks sake , And again , The Lord blessed Laban for his Servant Jacob's sake . And again , The Lord cured Naaman the Syrian of his Leprosie , for his little Hebrew Maids sake . And again , The Lord saved all the Men that were with Paul in the Ship , for Paul's sake . And again , The Lord would have saved all Sodom and Gomorrha for the sake of Ten Righteous Men. And in one word , whatever a good Servant putteth his Hand to , the Lord will prosper it in his Hand , Psal . 1. 3. And who then would be without a good Servant , or some other good Man in his Family , if he might be had either for Love or Mony , if he might be had at any rate ? Especially , seeing that even Self-Interest obliges a Man to get him such a one . And therefore , though a Man should be never so bad himself , yet even his Interest would oblige him , one would think , to bring up his Family in the Service of God , though he , like the Unjust Judge in the Gospel , cared neither for God nor Man , nor did at all value either Heaven or Hell. Lastly , Good Manners , and good Breeding , and common Civility , oblige a Man to bring up his Family in the Service of God , though he himself has no Religion at all . For , there is no Man so ill-bred , as to invite a Friend to take a Commons with him , and yet provide him nothing but what he knows he hath a perfect Antipathy against , and what he hates in his Heart , and what will make him Swoon away at the very sight of it . No Man is so ill-bred as to serve his Friend thus . And I believe , that no Man is so ill-bred as to invite a Friend to a Place , where he can neither see , nor hear , nor speak to any but what are his Mortal Enemies , and what have Murdered his best and his only Friend , and what would Murder him also , if ever they meet him . No Man certainly is so ill-bred as this comes to . And yet we all know , there is scarce a wicked Man upon Earth , but what Prays in his House at some time or other , or at least sends for the Minister to Pray with him at the point of Death . Then at least , once in his Life-time , the Minister , That Diminitive Creature he so often Laugh'd at , and Libell'd in all Places , the Minister is thought sit for his Company , when he himself is fit for no Bodies else . And what is it for a Man to pray to God in his House ? Is it any thing else , but to desire God to come into , and to Bless his House , and to enter under his Roof , and to Dwell in the Temple of his Body , and to Sup with him , and to translate him from Death to Life , and from Earth to Heaven ? Is a Family-Prayer any thing else ? And yet shall that Wicked Man Invite God to come into that place , that place of Sin , that Dunghil of Filth , his own House , which he knows that God hates , and loaths and abhors ? Shall that Wicked Man invite God to come into the Company of those wicked Servants of his , who have Crucified his only begotten Son , and trampled upon the Lord of Life , and counted his Blood an unholy thing , and done despite to his Spirit of Grace ? Shall that wicked Man invite a Jealous God to come into the Company of Whoremongers and Adulterers , whom he himself will judge to Eternal Scorchings in Hell ▪ Fire ? Shall that Wicked Man invite God to come into that place where he shall hear himself Cursed and Sworn against , and his Name Blasphemed to his Face ? Where he shall see a Swinish Lust preferr'd before him , and a Drunken Cup preferr'd before the Cup of Blessing , and a PAINTED Jezabel preferr'd before the Charms of the Immaculate Jesus that has neither SPOT nor Wrinkle ? Would any Man that has either Good Manners , or good Breeding , or any common Civility left him ; would any Man at all serve a Friend at such a rate , such a barbarous rate as this ? What , send for a Friend to abuse and affront him in his own House , and to buffet and to spit upon him , and to turn him out of Doors assoon as he comes , wounded , mangled , bleeding , gasping , dead , dead with the death of the Cross ? And yet , at this and a far worse rate does every Man serve God , who invites him to come into his House , where he can neither see nor hear any thing , but what Wounds and Stabs him to the Heart , and pierces his Bleeding Sides , and Crucifies him afresh , and puts him again to an open shame . And now canst thou possibly find in thy Heart to serve God thus ? What has God done that he should deserve this at thy Hands ? The very Abjects of the People that came about , and the Drunkards that made Songs , and Jested upon Holy David , did not serve him so ill as thou dost God. Nay , and ev'n Balaam himself did not serve his very Ass so ill as thou dost God : He presently saw his Error , but thou goest on still in thine , and wilt not see it . Tell me seriously , wherein has God offended thee so much , that thou dost thus use him ? Is not God thy Creator , thy Preserver , thy Redeemer , thy Saviour , thy All ? If yet thou hast any share at all in him . And which of all these unspeakable Mercies makes thee so much his Enemy ? 'T is greatly to be feared , that thou hast not the least Interest in God. Thou hast not the least Interest in that House which thou thy self dost wilfully set on Fire . Thou hast not the least interest in that Ship which thou thy self dost help to Sink . Thou art not the Right Owner of that Child which thou thy self dost cause to be divided , and killed in it's Mother's Presence . And if it be against all Good Manners to invite God to come into your Houses that you may affront him to his Face : Then , No Man that pretends to love God may presume to keep Company with bad Men , where God is daily affronted , without forfeiting all Claims to good Breeding . For , can I possibly go into that Company , and can I take any Pleasure in that Society , which abuses , and kills my Friend , that I love as my own Soul ? Yea , Is it not far worse for me to take pleasure in bad Men's Company , than it is for me to be a bad Man my self ? Is it not worse for me to love a Fornicator , than it is for me to be a Fornicator ? Yea verily . For says St. Paul speaking of Fornicators , and the Haters of God , They knowing the Judgment of God ( that they which commit such things are worthy of Death ) not only do the same , but have pleasure in them that do them , Rom. 1. 32. From whence it is plain , That to take pleasure in those Men's Company that do bad things , is far worse than for a Man to be bad himself . And therefore for the future , take special care what Men and Women's Company you take Delight in , and become One Flesh with . Do not find fault with those Men that bear their Testimony against these things . And do not reckon those Men proud , who are resolved , by God's Grace , to live and die according to these Rules , and to avoid all Familiarity with all God's Enemies , as far as they know them . For , how canst thou possibly pretend to be the Spouse of Christ , and yet take her for thy Wife , or him for thy Husband , who takes the Members of Christ and makes them the Members of an Harlot ? From all which it is plain . That tho thou pretendest to no great share of Religion : Yet , thou pretendest to Good Manners , and Good Breeding , and Common Civility ; and these very Motives , if there were none besides oblige thee to bring up thy Family in the Service of God. And yet alas ! these very Men that pretend most to Good Breeding and good Manners , do treat God the most unmannerly and the most rudely of all others . For , their Houses have the least Devotion in them . There it is , that Reading the Scripture , and Praying , and Singing of Psalms , and Repeating of Sermons , and Examining and Instructing of Families are the least observed . The richer those Men are , the more careless they are in Family-Duties . That is in plain English , The more kind God is to them , the more unkind , and the more ungrateful they are to him . Those very Blessings that should oblige them to bring God's Service into their Families , are used as Arguments to banish it out of all their Dwellings . Their very Greatness . Their Honour , which should oblige them to honour God most , for having honoured them so much above their Fellows , makes them to think it below them to condescend so far as to instruct their own Children , and much less their Servants . They did not think it below them to beget their Children in Sin , and consequently to serve the Devil ; and yet , they think it below them to bring up their Children in the Service of the Living God. They did not think it beneath them to make their Children the Firebrands of Hell , and the Children of Wrath ; and yet , they think it beneath them to make their Children the Children of Light , and the Heirs of Heaven . And here now , I know very well , that these Gentile-Men , as they think themselves , do charge us with Ill-Breeding for telling them of theirs so Publickly . But , whatever they Think of it , we know otherwise . We know whom we have believed . We know our selves guilty of as great a Fault , in not telling them of their Faults , as they are in committing them . And therefore we are forc'd to tell them further , That , this is not all the Rudeness and Incivility that these Civil Men , these Men of Good Manners , and Good Breeding are guilty of . For , it is not enough for them to think it below them-themselves to bring Religion into their Families , but they would have all others think it so too . They would have all others to run into the same excess of Riot with themselves . They neither go to Heaven themselves , nor suffer others to go thither , by their Good Will. But , if their Cups , their Roaring , their Revelling , and Clamorous Balling and Quarrelling do perhaps permit them at sometime to over-hear their Godly Neighbours either a Praying or a Singing of Psalms , or a doing any other Christian Duty in their Families , the least they say , is , That they are disturbed by them , and that they can have no quiet in their Houses for their silly whining ; and in plain Terms , that they are a Company of rank Hypocrites and Fanaticks . But Oh good God , what Times are we now fall'n into , when Sobriety , Gravity , and Family-Duties , shall be enough to Un-Church a Man ! What Times are we now fall'n into ! when Men are counted Sinners for following the Example of the Blessed Jesus , who expounded All those things to his Family in Private , which he had taught them in Publick , Mark 4. 34. What an Age is this that we now live in ! When Men are counted Sinners for doing as the Primitive Christians did ; for making their Houses to be the Houses of God , and for turning them into so many little Churches and Assemblies of the Saints of God , Rom. 16. 5. 1 Cor. 16. 19. Col. 4. 15. Philem. 2. And you do not know but that in one of these Little Hutts , your Lot , the Pawn of your Peace , the Pledge of your Safety , and the Hostage of your Security , your Lot may dwell . Once more . What an Age is this that we now live in ! When Men shall be counted Hypocrites for doing those Family-Duties , and making such a necessary Provision for the Souls of their Children and their Servants , which if they do not make , St. Paul tells them expresly , They deny the Faith , and are worse than Infidels ! And if Men are grown to such an extravagant , and such a monstrous Height of Impiety , as to reckon that to be no Breach of Duty , but rather a commendable Action , which makes them Denyers of their Faith , yea , and makes them worse than the very worst Infidels . Good God! What will the end of these things be ? And thus I have done . But do not you think , that you also have done with what you have now heard . Your Work does but Begin , when mine is Ended . Your Work is to Do and Practise what I have deliver'd according to God's Word , and not to Judge , and to Censure it . For , if thou judge the Law , thou art not a Doer of the Law , but a Judge , Jam. 4. 11. Your Work is to Do , and not Only to Hear . Do you therefore make a Solemn Vow unto the Lord : But make it Now : Make it before you stir from hence . Joshua gives you , and the thing it self requires no longer time to consider of it . For says he , Chuse you this day whom you will serve . If you will chuse at all , you must chuse out of hand , you must chuse to day , even Now. Now therefore do you All make a Solemn Vow unto the Lord , That , if you have neglected Family-Duties hitherto , you will never neglect them for the time to come . But , whatever others may do in their Families , As for Vs , as for All Vs that are here present , we and our Families will serve the Lord ; yea , we will serve him against all Opposition to the contrary . And let all the People say , Amen , Lord Jesu , Amen and Amen . Postscript . THIS Discourse was Made , Preached , and Printed for the benefit of all Men , whether they Dissent from , or Conform to the Excellent Order of the Church of England . Which End that it may the better obtain , I am to acquaint you with a Question proposed to me since I Preached it , and the Answer that I gave my Friend that proposed it . The Question was this . How I would have Family-Duties performed , by the Common-Prayer-Book , or by a Prayer of ones own making , or any ones else ? And The Answer was this . The Church of England had not decided either way ; and consequently had left it indifferent ; and accordingly I had done so too . And therefore , so it were but gravely , devoutly and affectionately performed , it was not very material whether the one way or the other . And the Reasons of this Answer are these . First of all , There is no Learned and Sober Dissenter , that I can hear of , who reckons the Common-Prayer-Book or any other Set-Form of Prayer , of itself simply unlawful , so the Matter of it be good , and the Expressions plain , full and significant . For otherwise , so many Learned and Pious Men among them had never Printed any Family-Prayers , nor had the Directory been ever made . And therefore , even according to the Dissenters themselves , A Set-Form is lawful as well as a Prayer of ones own making . Secondly , The Authors of the Common-Prayer-Book did never design it for the use of Private Families . For otherwise , A Form of Prayer to be used in Private Houses every Morning and Evening , had never been Printed with our Bibles after the Singing Psalms . And Bishop Patrick is express in the Preface to his Devout Christian , That the Reverence due to the Common-Prayer-Book will be best preserved , by imploying it only in the Publick Divine Service ; or in the Private , where there is a Priest to Officiate . And therefore , even according to the Church of England it self , A Prayer of any ones making may be as well , if not better used in Private Families , than even the Common-Prayer-Book it self . Thirdly , The 55 Canon does command all Ministers before their Sermons , to move the People to joyne with them in Prayer , not only in that Form there prescribed , But also to that Effect , as briefly as conveniently they may . And if the Church Commands us to do so in Publick , much more does it Allow us to do so in Private . And therefore , even according to the Church of England it self , A Prayer of ones own Making may be lawfully used in Private Families , as well as a Set-Form . And therefore , seeing these things are so ; I do First of all , make this humble Request to all Dissenters : Seeing the most Learned and the most Pious Authors of your Perswasion have Printed , and thereby have Allowed the use of Set-Forms of Prayer for Family-Duties : And seeing that all among you have not the Gift of Ex tempore Prayer : Therefore be pleased to Pray to God by a Set-Form , rather than not Pray to him at all . When you cannot make a Prayer of your own , be pleased to make use of one already made to your Hands : Or to make use of your own Comparison , Take Crutches when you cannot go without them . Take the Help of others , when you cannot help your selves . And that this is no unreasonable Request is plain , from this following Instance . An Ingenious and a Pious Merchant of this City , my Good Friend , Lodged in his Youth in a considerable Dissenters House : And after some Observation , he perceived that he and his Family never went to Prayers . Upon which , he very fairly took his Landlord aside , and asked him the reason why he had no Family-Duties in his House ? And his Landlord gave him this Ingenuous Answer . Iown my self guilty of Sin in doing as I do , and I do not know how I can possibly avoid it . For , I cannot Pray Ex tempore ; and I reckon it unlawful to Pray any other way . And let all Unlearned Men of that Perswasion lay their Hands to their Hearts , and see whether this be not more or less their own condition ? And that 's my First Request . And my Second Request is to the Church of England-Men , and 't is this . Seeing the Church does not oblige you to use the Common-Prayer-Book in your Families : Yea , seeing it does rather oblige you to use some other Prayers , unless you have a Priest to Officiate : Yea , farther , Seeing its Canons do leave you at liberty to use a Set-Form , or else , to make a Prayer of your own to the same Effect , as conveniently as you may : Yea and further yet , seeing it gives you this Liberty even in Publick before your Sermons ; Then , do not you be as superstitiously for , as some few others are superstitiously against Set-Forms . Let not those that Pray Ex tempore Despise them that Pray by a Form : And let not those that Pray by a Form Judge them that Pray Ex tempore . For , I do not in the least doubt but they both do it to the Lord. And I do not in the least doubt neither , but the Lord hath received them both . The only Misery on 't is this . We both agree very well when we understand one anothers meaning . But we scarce ever vouchsafe to give one another a Meeting , that we may understand one another . Let then the Dissenters be but pleased to Pray by a Form in Our Families , and we will come and Pray Ex tempore in Theirs . Or if they cannot condescend to this , let them but be of the same Heart , tho they cannot be of the same Mind with us . Let us love one another , and freely converse together without any Jealousie or Suspicion . And then , tho we should chance to be like Christs Coat of divers Colours , and various Judgments : Yet , we may be like it also , Seamless , and all of a piece , knit together in one common Bond of Charity . We may hold the Faith in Vnity of Spirit , in the Land of Peace , and in Righteousness of Life . And that this is no unreasonable Request neither , is plain from this following Instance . About three or four years ago , I was acquainted with a Learned , a Sober , and a Wealthy Country-Gentleman of the Church of England . And upon some Assurances that he gave me of his Friendship , both by Word of Mouth , and by Letter , I took him to be my Friend . And one Night being in his House , and being desired to read Prayers , I readily complyed with so good a Motion . But , finding the Second Lesson to be a difficult Chapter in the Epistle to the Hebrews , which I my self did not well understand , I exchanged it for another , against the Vanity of Apparel , as I thought , of more Edification to some Persons who were there present . But the Gentleman , belike , took it ill , that I should offer to change the Chapter , and asked me the Reason why I durst do so . To which I gave these Answers . First , I did not well understand that Chapter my self , and 't was not very likely that his Family could understand it better . Secondly , If I had understood it better , I would not have read it notwithstanding : Because , another was more useful for some Persons there present , who were , in my Judgment , but too vain and light in their Apparel : Adding , that where-ever I should chance to be , I would always do that , which would do most good to my Hearers , tho it were to my great Disadvantage in this World. Thirdly , I had the express Order of the Church for what I did : For , the Admonition to all Ministers Ecclesiastical , Printed before the Homilies , has these Words , Where it may so chance some one or other Chapter of the Old Testament to fall in order to be read upon the Sundays or Holydays , which were better to be changed for some other of the New Testament of more Edification , it shall be well done to spend your Time to consider well of such Chapters before-hand , whereby your Prudence and Diligence in your Office may appear ; so that your People may have cause to glorify God for you , and be the readier to embrace your Labors , to your better Commendation , to the Discharge of your Consciences and their own . And yet for all this , and a great deal more to the same purpose that I then said to him , he so stifly and so obstinately stuck to the Kalendar , that He wholly disregarded the Edification of his Family , the Breach of Friendship , and the excellent Order of the Church . From both which Instances , not to give you any more , I humbly conceive , that both my Requests are not at all unreasonable or unseasonable . And God of his infinit Mercy grant that they may be both Duly weighed , and Conscientiously Practiced . And God grant also , that the Rigid and High-flown Men of both sides may be Disallowed and Discountenanced ! And that the Moderate and Sober Men of both sides may be only approved and encouraged ! That so , Our Moderation may be known unto all Men , and that our Jerusalem may be a City that is at Peace and Unity with its self ! And Oh how willingly would I go and meet them half way ! Yea , How willingly would I go and meet them to their own Houses ! And God grant all Men may be of the same Mind for Christ his sake ! Amen , Amen . And besides these things that do equally concern my Conforming and Non-Conforming Brethren : I have one thing more which I humbly crave leave to offer to the Consideration of my Brethren the Clergy of the Church of England in particular , because I conceive it will very much further the Observation of Family-Duties : And 't is this . The chief things which Family-Duties consist of , are Reading the Scripture , Praying and Catechizing . And the Rubrick obliges all Ministers to Read , in their respective Churches , Morning and Evening-Prayer , Every Day , as well as Every Lord's-Day throughout the Year . And the Rubrick and the 59th Canon oblige them also to Catechize every Lords-Day , and every Holy-Day , ( and not only in Leant-time , ) in the Afternoon for half an Hour or more , either before Evening-Prayer , or after the Second Lesson . And this they oblige them to upon pain of Sharp Reproof for the First Fault , Suspension for the Second , and Ex-communication for the Third . Now if Parish-Ministers will not do this of themselvs ; and if the Bishops will not make them do it , by putting the Laws in Execution against them : Then , How can it be expected , that the People will do it in their Private Houses , when the Clergy themselves will not do it in the Church of God ? How can it be expected , that the People should Pray and Catechize in their Families , when the Ministers dare not press them to do so , for fear of betraying their own Carelessness and Breach of Subscription ? No Man can Heartily Preach against that Sin , which he himself is guilty of , but his Conscience must needs fly in his Face : And if he do Preach against it after some sort or other no , Man can scarce believe a word of what he says , seeing his own Practice is quite contrary , and his Example confutes his Preaching . God knows my Heart ▪ I do not say this to Cast any Contempt upon the Clergy : But , it possible , to Wipe away some of that which , I am afraid , is but too deservedly cast upon too many of Us. Which God of his Infinite Mercy grant , for Christ his sake . Amen , Amen . FINIS . ADVERTISEMENT . THere are Two Scurrilous and Scandalous Pamphlets Maliciously and Industriously spread about concerning me , to the hindrance of my Ministerial Office , and the blasting of my Reputation : Which , if any Man of Common Honesty dare but own , and set his Name to , and acquaint the World with the Place of his Abode , shall be shortly answer'd to the full . In the mean time , Silence and Pity shall be all my Reply ; and in the Words of my Saviour , who suffered many such Contradictions of Sinners , I do heartily Pray to God , Father forgive them ; for they do not know what they do , Luke 23. 34. Since which , There being a Friendly Vindication of my Farewel-Sermon , Printed in a Sheet and a half , by a Person wholly unknown to me , I do here publickly return him my hearty Thanks , and I am ready to do so in private too , when-ever he shall be pleased to make himself known to me . And there being an Abusive Vindication , Printed in half a Sheet , and pretended to be Writ by My Self , and to be Published by my own Book-sellers , to make it go off the better ; I do here openly declare , that I never Writ it , and that my Book-sellers never Published it , nor knew any thing of it . Notes, typically marginal, from the original text Notes for div A47028-e280 Reason 1. Reason 2. Reason 3. Reason 4. Reason 5. Obj. Answ . Reason 6. Reason 7. Reason 8. Reason 9. Notes for div A47028-e4310 Quest . Answ . Reason 1. Reason 2. Reason 3. 
A51033	----	The way to true honour and happiness A friendly address to all parents, masters of families, and landlords, the persons most capable to honour ... , and to gain honour to themselves, by beginning and carrying on a rational reformation. To which is added, [A] memorandum for mothers. By John Mitchell, M.A. Mitchell, John, fl. 1697. 1697 Approx. 68 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 25 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2003-01 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A51033 Wing M2287B ESTC R221889 99833134 99833134 37609 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A51033) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 37609) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 2191:15) The way to true honour and happiness A friendly address to all parents, masters of families, and landlords, the persons most capable to honour ... , and to gain honour to themselves, by beginning and carrying on a rational reformation. To which is added, [A] memorandum for mothers. By John Mitchell, M.A. Mitchell, John, fl. 1697. 48 p. printed by I. Dawks, for B. Barker by the Fountain-Ta... at the foot of the Hay-Market, near Pell-Mell; sold by R. Baldwin in Warwick-lane, London : 1697. Gathered in 4's. Copy tightly bound with loss of title and text. Reproduction of the original in the Lambeth Palace Library, London. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. EEBO-TCP is a partnership between the Universities of Michigan and Oxford and the publisher ProQuest to create accurately transcribed and encoded texts based on the image sets published by ProQuest via their Early English Books Online (EEBO) database (http://eebo.chadwyck.com). The general aim of EEBO-TCP is to encode one copy (usually the first edition) of every monographic English-language title published between 1473 and 1700 available in EEBO. 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Understanding these processes should make clear that, while the overall quality of TCP data is very good, some errors will remain and some readable characters will be marked as illegible. Users should bear in mind that in all likelihood such instances will never have been looked at by a TCP editor. The texts were encoded and linked to page images in accordance with level 4 of the TEI in Libraries guidelines. Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Repentance -- Early works to 1800. Christian life -- Early works to 1800. Family -- Religious life -- Early works to 1800. Women -- Conduct of life -- Early works to 1800. Mother and child -- Religious aspects -- Early works to 1800. 2000-00 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2001-11 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2002-02 TCP Staff (Oxford) Sampled and proofread 2002-02 TCP Staff (Oxford) Text and markup reviewed and edited 2002-03 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion The Way to True Honour and Happiness . A FRIENDLY ●DDRESS TO ALL ●ARENTS , 〈…〉 ters of Families , AND ●ANDLORDS , 〈◊〉 Persons most capable to Honour 〈◊〉 and to gain Honour to them 〈…〉 by beginning and carrying on a 〈…〉 IONAL REFORMATION . To which is Added , 〈…〉 emorandum for Mothers , 〈◊〉 Iohn Mitchell , M. A. LONDON , 〈◊〉 I. Dawks , for B. Barker by the Fountain-Ta 〈…〉 the Foot of the Hay-Market , near Pell-Mell ; 〈…〉 d by R. Baldwin in Warwick-lane , 1697. Price stitch't , 4 d , IT is earnestly desired , That Magistrates , Landlords , and other Rich People , would distribute some Copies of this little Book , among their Tenants and Servants , and among poor People , that many may be awakened to a sense of their Duty , and may concur and unite their Endeavours for carrying on that Glorious REFORMATION , which all sober Persons are longing and praying for . Dan. 12. 3. They that turn many to Righteousness shall shine . A Friendly ADDRESS TO ALL PARENTS , ●asters of Families , AND LAND LORDS , &c. Dear Friends , ●N reading the New Testament , you may 〈◊〉 see , That the Practice of Christianity is 〈◊〉 degenerated ; and in observing the ways 〈◊〉 of Men , you do see , that the Nation is 〈…〉 rupted . Vice abounds , and Wickedness 〈…〉 ails . Almost none walking in the ways 〈…〉 ety and Vertue , and very few walking in 〈◊〉 ways of Civility or Honesty . All Fami●● all Persons have corrupted their Ways ; most are vitious and all are negligent ; there is none Righteous , no not one . The Justice of the Eternal Majesty is provoked , his Laws contemned , his Mercy despised , his Grace abused , his Promises and Threatnings disregarded , and all the Methods of his P●●vidence neglected . And what shall be the end thereof ? The Word of God gives us ground to hope , that a real and speedy Re●ormation may be a Mean to prevent deserved Condemnation , Isa. 55. 6 , 7. But without this , let none presumptuously expect Mercy . For the Righteous Judge of the world is unchangeably just and holy , and will not , yea , cannot pardon impenitent Sinners : for it were against the Declarations of his Eternal Truth , which is firmer than the Pillars of Heaven and Earth . For tho' the Mercies of God and the Merits of Christ ar● infinite , yet neither of these can save one Impenitent Sinner ; for He who cannot lye , hath said , Luke 13. 3 , 5. Except ye repent , ye shall likewise perish , Mat. 18. 3. So that true Repentance and a thorow Re●ormation is the only door of Hope , and way to Escape . Quest. But how shall this Reformation be done ? who shall begin and promote it ? Answ. Some Person must beg●n it , otherwise it cannot be done ; and who is so capable ●s you , my Friends ? Indeed Magistrates and 〈…〉 s●ers may do much , but they cannot do all . 〈◊〉 so ●it as you ( Masters of Families and 〈…〉 lords ) to Reform the Nation , and to reap 〈◊〉 Honour and Reward of so Noble and Glo 〈…〉 a Work. The whole Nation depends 〈◊〉 you , and lodges within your Doors ; and 〈◊〉 can say with good resolution , courage 〈◊〉 zeal , as that good Man said , Ios. 24. 15. 〈◊〉 for me and my house , we will serve the Lord : 〈◊〉 may you signalize your selves for Men of 〈…〉 our , and gain the honour due to Conque 〈…〉 , over the power of Darkness . And tho' 〈◊〉 meet with opposition and discouragement 〈◊〉 , yet after wards , when Men are inlight 〈…〉 and made sensible of their own good , the 〈…〉 ole Nation will respect and honour you , yea 〈…〉 ren and Earth will smile upon you , and join 〈◊〉 you in Songs of everlasting Joy and 〈…〉 mph . Object . Alas ! What can we do ? We need 〈…〉 ormation as well as others . Most of us are 〈…〉 orant , and all of us are Guilty : we know 〈◊〉 what to do ; we cannot Re●orm our selves , 〈◊〉 less others . Answ. It is true , you have neither Skill , 〈…〉 ll nor Power , to Reform others , until your 〈…〉 res be new Creatures ; you cannot direct o 〈…〉 rs in the way which you know not , and you 〈◊〉 not assist others in the work which you 〈◊〉 not ; you cannot lead others , while your 〈◊〉 are Blind , nor strengthen others , while 〈◊〉 selves are weak in Grace . Therefore Self-Reformation must go before Family-Reformation ; you must first learn before you can teach . And for your Assistance , this Method is humbly offered to each of you . 1. Retire from the world for some time , and remove from thy mind all thoughts of it , and all Concerns about it , that there may be room for Spiritual Meditation . 2. Consider that thou hast a faculty or power of thinking , whereby thou art capable to know spiritual Things , and to converse with spiritual Beings : And that this spiritual part of thee , is out of its Element , and acting contrary to its Nature , when it is employed about earthly Things . 3. Consider that thou gavest not Being to thy self ; for thou canst not make thy self wiser nor taller ; thou canst not give to thy self the things which thou wantest ; thou canst not add one finger to thy Hand , nor one joint to thy Body ; neither can any other Creature give them to thee . And this will oblige thee to believe , that there is a Supream Being , which made all things , and upon whom all do depend . 4. Being convinced that there is a God , or a Supream Being , who made and maintains all things , and to whom all are accountable ; surely there must be some acknowledgments of dependance upon him , and of Duty towards him ; and this will oblige thee to enquire after his Will , Laws and Commands . 5. And since his Will and Laws are to be 〈◊〉 no where so likely , as in that Book which 〈…〉 lled the BIBLE , and which is commonly 〈…〉 ed for his Word , thou wilt think it thy 〈◊〉 to enquire diligently and seriously into 〈◊〉 Book , and remark every thing contained 〈…〉 ein , which will wonderfully inform thy 〈◊〉 and direct thy Judgment , and shew thee 〈◊〉 his will and ways , and thy state and duty . 〈…〉 Particularly , this Holy Book will teach thee 〈◊〉 Six Things ; without the knowledge 〈…〉 ereof thou art not safe , and canst not be 〈…〉 ppy . 1. That Man was created innocent and ho 〈…〉 endued with the Image of God , whereby 〈…〉 was admirably furnished and fitly qualifyed 〈…〉 glorify and enjoy God. 2. That God the Creator made a Covenant 〈…〉 Man , including all his Posterity , promi 〈…〉 g them Life and Happiness upon their Obe 〈…〉 ence ; and threatning them with Death and 〈…〉 isery , upon their Disobedience . 3. That Man did disobey , and rebelled a●●inst his Maker , and turned away from him , 〈…〉 made himself and all his Posterity , 〈◊〉 〈…〉 miserable ; so that the holy Nature of God 〈…〉 orred him , the righteous Law of God con 〈…〉 ned him , and the Honour and Justice of 〈…〉 , required , that the Curse of the Law should 〈…〉 inflicted upon him . 4. Man being thus become abominable and 〈…〉 serable , he was altogether unable to restore himself to his former State ; he had no power to satisfy the Justice of God , no skill to intreat his Mercy , and no Merit to procure his Favour . Yea , he had no Creature in Heaven not Earth to befriend him , nor to interceed for him . 5. In this extremity of Misery , the infinitely wise and gracious God , was pleased to pity Mankind , and did promise , and in due time sent a Saviour to redeem him , and to restore him to Favour , and that without any necessity , merit or motive , but only of his own free Love and abundant Grace , Gen. 3. 15. Io. 3. 16. 6. That in and through this Saviour , God was graciously pleased to enter into new Terms with Man , to make a Covenant o● Grace with him , promising Life and Salvation to those who believe , and receive him upon the terms that he is offered ; and denouncing Death and Damnation to those who believe not , but despise and reject this Saviour , Io. 3. 18 , 36. Quest. What needs all this ? Is Sin so great an Evil as to offend God , and make Man so miserable ? Answ. Sin is the greatest Evil in the world 〈…〉 and the only Cause of all other Evil , because i 〈…〉 is contrary to the Nature and Will of the● greatest Good. It is the only thing in the world that God hates , yea , he must abhor and● spunish it , because it is contrary to his Purity and Holiness , and the violation of his Laws● which are holy , just and good , Hab. 1. 23. So that as the Law of God is violated by 〈…〉 , it must be repaired by Suffering , either in 〈…〉 Sinner or his Surety . For the honour of 〈…〉 d is concerned to vindicate his Justice , and 〈…〉 Justice is concerned to maintain his Law. Quest. Adam sinned , and must I suffer ? What ●th his sin affect me ? Answ. Adam being the natural and federal 〈…〉 ent to all Mankind , his guilt is reckoned 〈…〉 e , his punishment is due to thee , his cor 〈…〉 ted nature is inherent in thee , and many 〈…〉 of Rebellion and Transgression like unto 〈…〉 ● have been committed by thee . And if 〈◊〉 did most justly condemn the whole world 〈…〉 one sin , he may likewise most justly con 〈…〉 n thee for many sins . Quest. What way then can I be saved ? Answ. There is Salvation to be obtained . 〈…〉 d if thou diligently studiest two Books , thou 〈…〉 be thereby disposed to look and long for 〈…〉 Saviour , and gladly accept of him , being of 〈…〉 d unto thee . ● . Seriously study the Book of God's Law , 〈…〉 be firmly persuaded , that all the Precepts 〈…〉 eof are holy , just and good , and do oblige 〈…〉 inward as well as the outward Man , the 〈…〉 rt and Affections as well as Words and 〈…〉 ions ; and declareth every one accursed 〈…〉 o continueth not in every thing written in 〈…〉 Law to do the same , Deut. 27. 26. Gal. 3. 10 , The Law cannot pass by a Transgression , nor 〈…〉 give a Sin. ● Diligently acquaint thy self with the Book of thine own Conscience , that thou may 〈◊〉 know thy self ; and thou wilt find , that thou ● art a Sinner , and a Transgressor of the Holy ● Laws of God , both in thoughts , words and ● actions . Yea , thou wilt find , that in thy natural and unregenerate State , thou dost nothing● but sin , Heb. 11. 6. Rom. 8. 7 , 8. And in thy renewed State , thou dost nothing without 〈◊〉 Eccles. 7. 20. 1 Io. 1. 8. Thou wilt find , that naturally thou art destitute of the Image of God ; that thou a● dead in Trespasses and Sins , and art by natu●● a child of Wrath , and lyable to the just Judgments of God , Rom. 5. 18. Ephes. 2. 1 , 3. That thy whole Man is corrupted , and treasures of wickedness in every faculty of thy sou● 1. Thy Understanding is full of Darkne● and Error , great ignorance of God and of sp●ritual Things , and yet thou would be accounte● wise , but art negligent in seeking after use●● Knowledge , Eph. 4. 18. 2. Thy Will is obstinate , perverse and co●●trary to good , rebelling and fighting again●● God and his Law , and wholly inclined to Ev●● and Vanity , Io. 5. 40. 3. The Conscience is perverted , corrupted an● de●iled , full of treachery , deceit and lies , apt 〈…〉 call evil good , and good evil , and to flatter t 〈…〉 Soul with formal pretences and shadows , wit● out sincerity or reality , 1 Tim. 4. 2. Tit. 1. 1● 4. The Memory is corrupted and vain , a 〈…〉 to forget God , dependance upon him , and eve● ●●ty towards him , both as to matter and 〈…〉 er , substance and quality . It is apt to re 〈…〉 Wickedness , Vanity and Trifles , but to let 〈…〉 seful and necessary Truths . 5. The Affections and Passions are all cor 〈…〉 ed and abused ; our admiration , our love , 〈…〉 anger , our hatred , our desire , our fear , our 〈…〉 , our grief , our anger , &c. are often em 〈…〉 ed and exercised about things quite con 〈…〉 y to the appointment of God's Law. 〈◊〉 that the heart of Man is become a very 〈◊〉 generate thing , a sink of Sin and mass of Cor 〈…〉 ion , full of Malice , Impiety and Impurity , 〈…〉 ereby the spiritual and heaven-born Soul is 〈…〉 ome despicable , base and miserable , a slave 〈◊〉 own Servants , yea even to its greatest 〈…〉 mies , under the dominion of Sin , Satan , the 〈…〉 rld and the Flesh. And yet the greatest misery of all is , That 〈◊〉 is not sensible of this his miserable condi 〈…〉 , he knows it not , he is not affected with it ; 〈…〉 goes light under his load , and is chearful 〈…〉 is chains , fancying himself safe , happy and 〈◊〉 Rev. 3. 17. And why ? because his mind 〈…〉 nded , and his heart hardned . For it is of 〈◊〉 nature of sin to blind the Mind and harden 〈◊〉 Heart , as well as to de●ile the Conscience 〈◊〉 pollute the Soul. That very sin which 〈…〉 es the Man guilty , makes him likewise past 〈…〉 ng , Eph. 4. 18 , 19. ●oe is me ! is this my condition ? Am I one 〈…〉 hese miserable creatures ? Am I yet in a natural and unregenerate State ? I am not safe . What shall I do ? If thou art truly awakened from thy Lethargy , and convinced of thy Sin and Misery ; if thou art deeply humbled under a sense of the same ; if thou art perswaded , that thou canst not be saved by thy own Power , thy Skill , thy Duties , nor thy Merits ; if thou art so humble , that thou art willing to be beholden to another for help and safety ; yea , if thou hast hungring and thirsting Desires after Salvation , and art glad to submit to any terms to escape Sin and Misery , and to obtain Happiness and Glory : Then ( and not till then ) art thou fit to hear of Christ the Saviour , and to receive that comfortable invitation , Mat. 11. 28. Come unto me , &c. Isaiah 55. 1 , 2. Christ came to seek and to save such lost Sinners , as despair of Salvation any other way ; He will be a Physitian to such sick Souls . Behold the Terms of the Gospel-Covenant . If thou truly and sincerely repentest of sin , so that thou inwardly loathest and abhorrest it , and thy self , for being guilty of it . If thou truly and sincerely believest in Christ , so as to prize him above all things ; If thou receivest and acceptest of Him upon the Terms of the Covenant of Grace , as he is offered in the Gospel , for thy Prophet and Teacher , for thy Priest and Peace-maker , for thy King and Ruler , for thy Lord , and Law-giver , as well as thy Saviour and Redeemer ; if thou submittest 〈◊〉 committest thy self unto him , and art as 〈…〉 ing to give obedience to him as to receive 〈…〉 ation from him , to be sanctified by his Spi●●s well as to be saved by his Merits , and 〈…〉 ly resolvest to continue stedfast in this hap 〈…〉 〈…〉 emper of Mind to the end of thy life ; then 〈…〉 Sin is pardoned , thy Soul regenerated , thy 〈…〉 re sanctified , and thy Salvation infallible , 〈…〉 8. 1. Io. 6. 35 , 37. Io. 5. 24. Io. 3. 18 , 36. 〈◊〉 after thou hast laid the firm Foundation of 〈◊〉 Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ , thou dili●●ly addest to thy Faith , Vertue , Knowledge , 〈…〉 perance , Patience , Godliness , Brotherly 〈…〉 dness , Charity , and the rest of those heaven●● Graces and holy Vertues , which are Fruits 〈◊〉 Effects of Faith ; and dost abound in all 〈…〉 se , acting all Graces , practising all Ver●ues , 〈◊〉 performing all Duties ; and yet 〈…〉 ting in 〈…〉 ce of them , but only in Jesus Christ for Sal●●ion ; Then art thou as sure to be eternally 〈◊〉 , as thou art sure that thy Repentance is 〈◊〉 , thy Faith true , and thy Obedience sincere , 〈◊〉 . 5. 4. Act. 3. 19. Mark 16. 16. Act. 16. 〈…〉 Heb. 5. 9. 2 Pet. 1. 5 , 10 , 11. Be carefull still , to use humble and hearty 〈…〉 yers , as the Mean to procure all this , Mat. 〈…〉 . And still apply unto , and depend upon 〈◊〉 Holy Spirit , as the effectual worker of all 〈◊〉 , Rom. 8. 26. Io. 15. 5. 2 Cor. 3. 5. Now , my Friends , This is the way , walk ye 〈◊〉 . If ye know these things , happy are ye , if 〈…〉 o , and teach them . Be not content to go to Heaven alone , but take compassion upon other● and help them forward in this good way . Per●swade your selves , that Christ's command ob●liges you , Luke 22. 32. When you are Converted , strengthen you Brethren , especially your Children , Servant and all within your gates , and under you● Charge . God's Command is your Duty , and bin● you to obedience in this particular , Mat. 22. 39● Thou shalt love thy Neighbour as thy self . Quest. What Method shall we use in Reform●ing our Families ? Answ. Having brought your Mind to a ser●●ous Frame , and being perswaded of the nece●sity and excellency of Holiness , and havin● learned the Duties of Humility and Self-D●●nyal ; Then follow this Method . 1. Presently set ●p , and zealously keep up th● Worship of God in your Families , use Prayer● Praises , and reading of the Scriptures twice ●●very day at least , in presence of all the Family ●let nothing be an ordinary hindrance of thes● daily Sacrifices each day ; and on the Lord Day , let these Duties be doubled , as the ol● Sacrifices were , Numb . 28. 9 , 10. 2. Spend one hour at least , in instructin● and examining your Children and Servants , i● explaining Difficulties , and opening the mean●ing of the Scriptures to them . At first you ma● set them Tasks in some fit Books of Question● and Answers , till their capacity be enlarged . 〈…〉 ecially be careful to teach them to know 〈…〉 selves , what they are in their natural and 〈…〉 State , and what the effects , consequents 〈…〉 wages of sin are ; and this will make your 〈…〉 er-work more easy . For if you can tho●ly convince them , that they are sinners , 〈…〉 that the wages of every sin is death and 〈…〉 ation , and that there is no safety but in 〈…〉 Christ , and that in him is perfect Righ 〈…〉 sness and plenteous Redemption to all that 〈…〉 receive him as he is offered ; Then it will 〈…〉 asy to perswade them to learn to know 〈…〉 st and the Method of Salvation by him . 〈…〉 ey will be glad to be directed to the City 〈…〉 Refuge , when they see themselves pursued 〈…〉 the Justice of the Sin-revenging God , and 〈…〉 ble to all the Curses of his Law. Whereas without the knowledge of them●●es and their own State , they will not desire 〈…〉 knowledge of Christ , nor submit to Chri 〈…〉 Duties . What are all the Physitians in 〈…〉 wn to a Man in Health and Vigour , or all 〈…〉 places of Refuge to a Man that thinks 〈…〉 self honest and innocent . 3. Allow them time , and exhort them to 〈…〉 prove it in secret Prayer , reading the Scrip●●es , Meditation , and examining their own 〈…〉 rts ; and give them directions how to do 〈…〉 se things to good purpose . 4. Let your holy Example be their constant 〈…〉 ern , and your watchful Eye their constant 〈…〉 itor , and your frequent and familiar Conferences with them , be their constant Encouragement . Occasional Advices and pious Directions insinuated and dropt into them a● VVork , or at Meals , will wonderfully advanc● and set forward your solemn Teachings . 5. Neglect not to use Meekness and Patience , Love and Kindness in all your Dealing with them , in matters of Religion , that the● may be convinced , that you chiefly intend th● good of their Souls . 6. Let no stubborn Despisers of Piety remain within your Doors , lest they poison th● rest , and render your Labours fruitless . 7. Encourage the tractable and diligent , a● first , with little Rewards , till they come t● feel the sweetness of Holiness , the power o● Grace , and the habits of Vertue ; till they b● acquainted with the teachings of the holy Spirit , and then your work will be pleasant and delightful , your Scholars will then become Teachers . If you doubt of your Duty , and think that this is more than is required of you , then consider these Arguments to prove your Obligation . 1. It is the express command , and positive● Law of the great King of Heaven , the loving and gracious God , that you should teach and instruct your Families ; and therefore it is your indispensible Duty : And you cannot neglect it without Rebellion against your Creator , your Father and Soveraign . Take your Bible , read 〈◊〉 consider these Texts , Deut. 6. 4. Deut. 〈…〉 .19 . Deut. 4. 10 Eph. 6. 4. 〈…〉 God 's faithful Children and Servants 〈…〉 carefully performed this Duty . Christ 〈…〉 ed with and instructed his Family , Luke 〈…〉 Mark 4. 10 , 14. Cornelius feared God 〈…〉 all his House , Act. 10. 2. Abraham's pur 〈…〉 s approved of the Lord , Gen. 18. 19. And 〈…〉 Lord tells you , Io. 8. 39. If ye were Abra 〈…〉 Children , ye would do the Works of Abra 〈…〉 ; that is , if ye had Faith , ye would imi 〈…〉 his Example . 〈…〉 holy David's Practice be your daily 〈…〉 ern , Psal. 101. 2 Sam. 6. 20. 〈…〉 The Law of Nature obligeth you to this 〈◊〉 ; your Children are pieces of your selves , your Servants stand in a near relation to 〈◊〉 You feed and cloath their Bodies , and 〈…〉 it your Duty to do so , it is unnatural 〈…〉 ty to neglect and starve the Soul , and suf 〈…〉 to perish for want of knowledge and good 〈…〉 ation . They cannot serve you without 〈◊〉 , but with the whole Man ; therefore 〈…〉 ght to take care of the whole Man , and 〈…〉 t your greatest care upon the better 〈◊〉 ; otherwise many Birds and Beasts are 〈…〉 ng behind with you . Let your Religion Reason appear , in taking more care of the 〈…〉 t s of the most high God , than of your 〈…〉 and Horses . 〈…〉 The Oath of God is upon you by your 〈…〉 smal Engagements , that you will keep God's holy VVill and Commandments all the days of your life ; and you daily pray , that the VVill of God may be done on Earth as it is in Heaven . And since it is the Command and Will o● God , that you worship Him in your Families and oblige all that are under your charge to d● the sam● , you mock God , if you act not according to your Promise and Prayers , and yo● give your selves the lye , when you do not a● you s●y . 5. God hath intrusted you with the charg● of your F●milies , as his Vicegerent and Deputy and hath invested you with Christ's three O●●fices , to enable you to discharge that Trust. 1. Of a Prophet , to instruct and teach all u●●der your charge , to make known to them t●● mind of God. 2. Of a Priest , to offer up to God the Sacr●●fices of Prayer and Praises , with and for the●● 3. Of a King , to rule , govern , and keep goo● order in your Family ; to rebuke and puni 〈…〉 Error and Vice , and to encourage and rewa 〈…〉 Piety and Vertue . And since you must give account of this yo● Charge and Stewardship to the righteo 〈…〉 Judge , be careful so to manage and dischar 〈…〉 it , that neither the Law of God , the Gospel 〈◊〉 Christ , your own Conscience , nor any in yo 〈…〉 family , may accuse or condemn you at that da 〈…〉 6. Seriously consider the bad and dread 〈…〉 effects of the neglect of Family-Piety , Solom 〈…〉 〈…〉 you , Prov. 22. 6. Train up a Child in the 〈◊〉 where in he should go , and when he is old , he 〈◊〉 not depart from it . So that all the Enor 〈…〉 es and Impieties that every where abound , 〈◊〉 the miserable and unhappy consequences 〈◊〉 your neglect and carelesness . And when all 〈…〉 ese Iniquities are charged upon your score , 〈…〉 at a dreadful r●ckoning will it make ? No 〈…〉 nks to you , that England is yet 〈◊〉 , 〈◊〉 doth not suffer like Sodom . 7. Consider the glorious and com●ortable ●ffects that will attend your diligent and faith 〈…〉 ● discharge of Family-Duties , and that in a 〈…〉 reesold respect . 1. In respect of the Publick . Your Fami 〈…〉 are the Nurseries and Se●inaries both of ●hurch and State. Parishes , Towns , Cities ●nd Societies are made up of them , and all ●e 〈…〉 ions flow from them . Therefore to make Families good and reli●ious , is the most ready way to make good ●●gistrates , good Subjects , good 〈◊〉 , ●ood Church Members , good Husbands , good ●ives , good Masters , good Servants , good ●iends and good Neighbours . So that if your Families be Schools of Piety 〈◊〉 Vertue , both Church and Commonwealth ●ill reap the Fruits of your Labours , and ●weetly commemorate your Commendation . Neither Magistrates nor Ministers are ●o ●a●●ble to do this as you are , because your 〈◊〉 are contin●ally under your ●ye , and do more immediately depend upon you , and ar● more awed by you . B● this your religious care and diligence● ye mi●ht be very helpful both to Magistrate● and Ministers , and make their Offices pleasant and delightful , which now are comfortl●ss and toilsom . Particularly you would greatly assist and encourage Ministers , by preparing ●he ground wherein they might sow 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , by laying a good Foundation o● 〈◊〉 and solid Principles , whereupon they 〈◊〉 ●uild by Preaching ; whereas now by 〈◊〉 neg●●ct , their Labour is lost , and their P●ins unprofitable . Mo●eover , were your Families reformed a●d made Sanctuaries for the VVorship and Service of God , good Ministers would take pleasure to visit you , to assist and encourage you : VVhereas now they are afraid to come near you , lest they be flattered , ●louted or vainly diverted by your carnal Conversation . For I verily suppose , that much of the fault lyes in you , that they do not practice that ant●●nt and laudable custom of teaching from house to house , whereby they might do more good ●o Souls in one year , than perhaps they can do by publick Preaching in seven . 2. In respect of your selves , the effects of your religious care of your Families will be g●●at . VVhen the Inhabitants of your house become the Children and Servants of the great King of H●aven , your Families will be happy 〈…〉 ourable ; the rich Blessings of the boun 〈…〉 God will be multiplyed unto them , as La 〈…〉 as blest for Iacob's sake , and Potiphar 〈…〉 sephs . Moreover , they will be more active , 〈◊〉 and faithful in serving you , when they 〈…〉 m their Duties in the fear of the Lord , 〈…〉 om a Principle of good Conscience . Piety 〈…〉 ays the best Policy . The Fruits of your religious Care will be 〈◊〉 , with respect to your Children and Ser 〈…〉 themselves , both as to time and eter 〈…〉 Your holy care may be a Mean to make 〈…〉 happy , both here and hereafter . You may 〈…〉 r●ments of preventing and preserving 〈◊〉 from many Miscarriages , Misfortunes and 〈…〉 ies , which the want of good Education , 〈◊〉 vitious course exposes them to , and of 〈…〉 ying them from eternal Damnation . 〈…〉 now , my Friends , what greater honour , 〈…〉 ess and comfort can you desire , than 〈◊〉 employ and signalize your selves , in 〈…〉 e honourable and happy Instruments 〈…〉 orifying God , and of reforming both 〈…〉 h and Kingdom , of promoting Religio● , 〈…〉 eating the designs of Satan , of prevent 〈…〉 〈…〉 d removing much Wickedness , and 〈…〉 g many Souls to eternal happiness . 〈…〉 efore zealously ply your work , and 〈…〉 ntly expect your Reward , from Him 〈…〉 at h promised , 1 Sam. 2. 30. Them that 〈◊〉 ●e , will I honour , &c. Dan. 12. 3. They 〈◊〉 many to Righteousness , shall shine as the Stars , for ever and ever , James 5. 20. He th●● converteth a Sinner from the evil of his way , sh●● save a Soul from Death , and shall hide a mult●tude of Sins , Psal. 112. 6. The righteous shall in everlasting remembrance , Mat. 25. 46. T●● Righteous shall go into Life eternal . Let this encourage your diligence , that yo●● satisfaction and comfort will be great in th●● life , your Memory will be sweet to Posteri●● and your Reward will be everlasting Glory . Not withstanding all that hath been sa●● wicked Men and Hypocrites will be apt 〈◊〉 make several Objections , to excuse themselv●● from this Noble and Excellent Work ; un●● which I shall subjoin proper Answers , as 〈◊〉 many Arguments and Motives , to encoura●● your Labour and excite your Diligence . 1 Object . If we should instruct our Famili●● we may make them Hypocrites , we cann●● make them Christians ; It 's God alone th●● can change the Heart . Answ. God ordinarily worketh by mea● and bestoweth his Grace in the use of the O●●dinances which he hath appointed . VVhatev●● God worketh in us or , for us , He ordinar● doth by us , and with us ; and what He promiseth to us as Blessings , he requireth of us as D●ties , Ezek. 36. 26. Ezek. 18. 31. 2 Object . The work is impossible , the case 〈◊〉 desperate ; wickedness is become so univers●● that it is folly to attempt a Reformation . Answ. God and his Servants can do ●● 〈◊〉 Phil. 4. 13. God hath promised his ho 〈…〉 it to all those who ask him , Luke 11. 13. 〈…〉 a Spirit of Wisdom , Couns●l and Power , 〈…〉 if you sincerely use the means of his Ap 〈…〉 ment , He will guide you into all Truth , 〈…〉 ill help your Infirmities , he will encourage 〈◊〉 Hearts , direct your Judgments , and as 〈…〉 your Endeavours . ● Object . We have not time nor leasure to 〈…〉 ct our Families every day , and to call 〈…〉 to account , to pray with them , and read ●hem , &c. Answ. You will ●ind time to eat , drink , 〈◊〉 , and to enjoy your sensual Pleasures , and 〈◊〉 not to mind spiritual Pleasures , which are 〈…〉 e Noble ? You will ●ind time to die , and 〈◊〉 be judged , and why not to prepare for the 〈…〉 e ? Your only business in the world is to honour 〈◊〉 glorify God , and to work out your Salva 〈…〉 ; this is the one thing needful : ●f this be 〈…〉 glected , all other business is to no purpose . Be careful to Redeem your time from these 〈◊〉 great Robbers , and you will have leasure 〈…〉 ough for spiritual concerns : to wit , from , 〈◊〉 Vain Recreations , 2. Vain Discou●ses , 3. Vain 〈…〉 houghts , 4. Immoderate Sleepi●g , Eating 〈…〉 d Drinking ; and 5. Immoderate Care about 〈…〉 orldly Business . There is nothing can hinder your minding 〈…〉 spiritual concerns of your selves and Fami 〈…〉 , but the Vanities of the VVorld , or the Lusts of the Flesh ; and these ye have renounced in your Baptism , and vowed a perpetual VVar against them ; so that you are perjured if you suffer your selves to be entangled an● hindred by them , Mat. 16. 26. 1 Io. 2. 15 , 16. 4 Object . It is below us to stoop to so mea● an Office , as to teach Children and Servant● the first Principles of Religion ; we can employ our selves more Nobly in the Tavern or Alehouse , in playing at Cards , or conversing with our Friends . Answ. This is rather the Language of Practice , than of the Tongue . Christ our Lord was of another mind , who went about doing good , and hath left us an Example that we should follow his steps . He took delight , and counted it his Meat and his Drink , to do the VVill of his heavenly Father ; and so should we , Prov. 11. 30. He that winneth Souls , is wise . Lewis IX . King of France , was found teaching a Kitchen-Boy : and being asked why he stoopt to so mean an Office ? he said , The meanest Child of Adam has as pretious a Soul as mine , and bought with the same pretious Blood of Christ , and must shine in Heaven , or fry in Hell for ever . The ●irst step to Christianity , is a profound humility . A proud Christian is a painted Devil . 5 Object . VVe are ashamed to begin that Exercise , which we have often intermitted , or long neglected . Answ. If thou art ashamed to repent and 〈…〉 d , and to own Christ and his Service , pre 〈…〉 thee to receive that Sentence , Depart from 〈…〉 ye workers of Iniquity , Luke 13. ●7 . Mark 〈…〉 8. Christ rejoiced to take our Nature● that 〈◊〉 night die , to redeem us . VVe should re 〈…〉 to have our Nature renewed , that we 〈…〉 become like him , and be made partakers 〈◊〉 Salvation , 2 Cor. 5. 17. Rom. 8. 9. ● Object . VVe are wllling to set up the Wor 〈…〉 of God , and to reform our Families , but 〈…〉 e loath to begin yet ; we would have 〈◊〉 to shew us the way , and bring this Exer 〈…〉 into custom . 〈…〉 sw . All Delays are dangerous , but here 〈◊〉 are damnable , because contrary to God's 〈…〉 mands , Heb. 3. 7 , 8. 2 Cor. 6. 2. If you 〈…〉 se your selves , and postpone , decline and 〈◊〉 this great and necessary work , God may 〈◊〉 remove you out of the way , and raise up 〈…〉 rs , who may be Instruments of a great and 〈…〉 ious Reformation , which you may never 〈◊〉 the happiness to see . For the glorious 〈◊〉 will be glorified , and his holy Name shall 〈…〉 llowed ; and happy they who shall be in 〈…〉 ents of it . Let a holy Ambition always 〈…〉 s your Souls , and covet that Honour 〈◊〉 cometh from God. If you desire the 〈…〉 est Honour and Reward , do not decline 〈…〉 rdest VVork . ● Object . VVe shall be jeered and laughed 〈◊〉 i● we be singular , and differ from our 〈…〉 ghbours . Answ. Sober singularity , is safer than joint ●●mpiety . It is better to walk alone in God'●● way , than with company in the Devils . As th●● world goes now , none can get to Heaven , wh 〈…〉 go not contrary to its course . Let Ioshuah'● Resolution be your Example , Ios. 24. 15. A● for me and my House , we will serve the Lord 〈◊〉 Yea , the great God commands you to be singu●lar , Exod. 23. 2. Thou shalt not follow a multi●tude to do evil , Rom. 12. 2. Be not conformed t● this world . Yea , you need not be altogether● singular ; join Counsels with some hones● Neighbours , and encourage and assist one ano●ther . 8 Object . If we shall spend so much time a●bout Religio●s Matters as is requisite to ac●complish these ends , we shall neglect our Em●ployments , lose our Custom , and so becom● Poor . Answ. That is the suggestion of Satan , an● the distrustfulness of thy corrupt heart . God'● Promises are a sure Portion , Mat. 6. 33. Luk● 12. 31 , 32. Psal. 84. 11. Psal. 37. 3. Moderate your worldly Desires and sensu●● Appeti●es ; deny the extravagant Cravings o● your corrupt Nature , and be contented , if yo 〈…〉 have Food and Rayment ; then you are as ric 〈…〉 as you desire to be , and no Man is more . If your greatest care be for the better part● you will find by experience , that a few thought● of holy Faith , Hope and Trust , will save you 〈◊〉 great many thoughts , cares and fears for you ●emporal Life . Notice these Texts , Prov. 〈…〉 . 2 , 3 , 4 , 22. Psal. 34. 10 , 22. ● Object . If we sh●ll addict our selves to a 〈…〉 ligious Life , then we shall be dull , mopish 〈…〉 melancholy , and never have a joyful day 〈…〉 pleasant hour . Answ. Mistake not the Shadow for the Sub 〈…〉 ce ; carnal Pleasures are transient and vain , 〈◊〉 spiritual Pleasures are satisfying and dura 〈…〉 , Iob 20. 5. The triumphing of the Wicked is 〈◊〉 , and the joy of the Hypocrite is but for a 〈…〉 nt , Psal. 37. 35 , 36. You may read , Iob 〈…〉 Iob 20 , Iob 21. Prov. 24. 20. how unsa 〈…〉 ing and uncertain the Pleasures of the 〈…〉 ed are . ●arthly Pleasures may for a season gratify 〈◊〉 earthly part of us , the Bodily Appetites , 〈◊〉 they can never fill the unlimited D●sires of 〈◊〉 spiritual Substance the Soul , which those 〈◊〉 have been under trouble of Mind , do 〈◊〉 by experience . 〈…〉 deed , sensual and ●arthly-minded persons , 〈…〉 se Souls are dead , and Consciences asleep , 〈…〉 seem to rejoice and be merry , when they 〈◊〉 the Objects of their Desires ; but their 〈◊〉 is both shallow and short , Prov. 14. 13. Even ●ughter the Heart is sorrowful , and the end 〈…〉 t Mirth is heaviness . 〈◊〉 is true , the Children of God may ●ave 〈◊〉 sad and sorrowful hours , before they be 〈…〉 ed of their Reconciliation with God ; the 〈◊〉 and sense of their corrupt Nature , their sinful State and sinful Practices , their estrangement from God , and the sense of his displeasure against sin , their daily rebelling corruptions , and restless enemies , do cost them many Groans , Sighs and Tears , much Sorrow and Lamentation ; yet the end of that heaviness is joy , Psal. 30. 5. Weeping may endure for a night , but joy cometh in the morning . In the midst of all their Sorrows and Sufferings , the faithful Servants of God can draw present Comfort , solid Joy , and spiritual Rejoycing , from these five Springs which never fail . 1. From the Fountain of God's Bounty and Goodness , who gives to all Men liberally . They recounting the great Mercies and many Blessings which they enjoy , and finding that they far exceed the Troubles they undergo , their hearts are filled with Praise and Thanksgiving , whereby their Minds are eased , and their Souls comforted , so that they can joyfully serve the God of their Mercies , even when he seems to frown upon them , Iob 1. 21. and 2. 10. and 13. 15. 2. They find the Spirit of God carrying on the work of Sanctification in their Souls , in his ordinary method , first humbling the Soul , and breaking the heart , exciting to Mourning , Contrition and Repentance , before he intimate Pardon and Forgiveness . And they know , that he who is now a sancti●ier and worker of grace , will e're long , appear to be a Comforter and 〈…〉 ne●s of grace , Mat. 5. 4. Psal. 126. 5 , 6. Rom. 〈…〉 16. They know that the Penitent have 〈…〉 omise of Pardon ; and finding Repentance 〈…〉 rking in their Hearts , by their hatred and 〈…〉 hing of sin ; in hope of pardon of Sin , 〈…〉 ce with God , and Inheritance among them 〈…〉 t are sanctified , they joy in the Lord , and 〈…〉 oice in the God of their Salvation . 3. The VVord of God assures them , that 〈◊〉 are spiritual Pleasures sufficient to fill the 〈…〉 res of the Soul , Io. 16. 24. 1 Io. 1. 4. Ps 〈…〉 11. And their Spirits do experimentally 〈…〉 est this Truth ; so that they are filled with 〈…〉 oy and Peace in believin● Rom. 15. 13. and 〈…〉 glory even in Tribul 〈…〉 n , Rom. 5. 2 , 3. 4. The Promises of God are an overflowing 〈…〉 ntain of Joy , Peace and Comfort to all the 〈…〉 ithful . The Child of God esteems them 〈…〉 etious , and would not part with them for 〈◊〉 whole world , 2 Pet. 1. 4. Psal. 110. 72. These Promises do fully assure us , that Sor 〈…〉 and Mourning shall come to an end , and 〈…〉 Joy , Peace and Com●ort , shall succeed , and 〈…〉 ure for ever , Io. 16. 20. Isaiah 51. 11. 〈…〉 . 21. 4. 5. The Children of God do rejoice , and 〈…〉 re inward comfort in their Union with 〈…〉 i st , and Conformity to him . Since he who their Head , did live here a Life of Sorrows 〈◊〉 Sufferings , and then entred into his Glo 〈…〉 they rejoice to suffer with him , that they 〈…〉 be glorified together with him , 1 Pet. 4. 〈…〉 . Rom. 8. 17. So you see , and you ought to believe , that if you sincerely love and serve God , you may have solid Joy and continual Comfort from these five grounds : 1. From God's love and goodness . 2. From the Workings and Witness of the glorious Spirit . 3. From the Truth of God. 4. From his gracious Promises . And , 5. From your interest in Christ , and likeness to him . Yea , Prayer and Meditation will never fail to refresh the Soul , and chear the heart . So that it is your great mistake to think , that Religion yields no Pleasure , but is a dull and Melancholy State ; ●it is great ignorance and delusion , that makes ●s ●en to think or speak so , contrary to God's Word , and his Childrens Experience , Prov. 3. 17. All her ways are ways of pleasantness , and all his paths are peace , Psal. 34. 8. O taste , and see that God is good ; blessed is the Man that trusteth in him , Psal. 63. 5. My Soul shall be satisfied as with Marrow and Fatness , and my Mouth shall praise thee with joyful Lips. Yea , there is no true Pleasure in the world but in the ways of Religion , because none else can satisfy the Soul. All earthly Pleasures are Brutish and ●it for the Body , that earthly part of us , and are common to us with the Brutes , and which some of them enjoy in a larger measure than we do . Only spiritual Pleasures are fit for spiritual Beings . If this be your temper , that you take more pleasure in earthly Things and bodily Concerns , than in Religious Exercises and the divine Promises : besure , you are yet in your ●atural and sinful State , and cannot be sa●ed , till you be renewed , regenerated and ●orn again , Rom. 8. 5 , 6 , 7 , 8 , 13. Io. 3. 3. 10 Object . Our Consciences tell us , and we confess ingenuously , that the chief cause o● our Neglect of these Duties , is our Sloth and Lazi●ess , Prov. 15. 19. Answ. This is as dangerous , deadly and ●mning a Sin as you can be guilty of , and will ●ore slily and as effectually undo you , as the ●ost heinous Crimes , Mat. 25. 26 , 30. The ●thful and unprofitable Servant is condemned as ●ll as the wicked , Prov. 18. 9. Every omission of a Duty , is the commission ●f a Sin , Iam. 4. 17. Rom. 12. 11. Now , my Friends , I am perswaded , that ●●st of you will approve of , and assent unto , ●hat is here proposed ; and you will own , that ●is every ones Duty and Interest to help for●ard a Reformation . You do faintly wish , O ●at the world were better ! O that People ●ere more honest and faithful ! O that my ●hildren were good and tractable ! O that my 〈…〉 vants were more honest and trusty ! O that ●eighbours were more kind and friendly ! ●c . But Wishes are vain , where E●deavour●●e wanting , Prov. 13. 4. Prov. 21. 25. Therefore since your Judgment approves , and your Conscience consents , let not your Will gainsay , and your Practice contradict . But agree with your self , be all of one piece ; let all the Faculties of your Soul and Powers of your Body , be employed in carrying on one Design , to wit , the Glory and Honour of God , and the eternal Happiness of Souls , 1 Cor. 10. 31. Phil. 2. 4. Let not not this Paper be a witness against you , nor a mean to condemn you , but rather a motive to excite you , and an instrument to perswade you . Let your Conscience be so informed and exercised now , that you may not be afraid nor asham'd of its Testimony at the day of Judgment . Take heed to your selves , what Conscience you have , For Conscience will damn , and Conscience will save . A MEMORANDUM FOR Mothers , And those who expect to be so . Honoured and loving Friends , YOU being reasonable Creatures , and called by the Noble Name of CHRISTIANS , 〈…〉 supposed and taken for granted , that you 〈◊〉 well informed in your Judgment , and firm 〈…〉 persuaded in your Conscience , that the Glo 〈…〉 os and Wise CREATOR of all things , hath 〈…〉 ed and appointed you to bring forth , and 〈…〉 g up Children for his Honour and Service , prepare Members of his Church on Earth , 〈…〉 Partakers of his Glory in Heaven . And it 〈◊〉 be thought , that all of you are ambitious ● this Honour , to be instrumental Causes of a 〈…〉 oly Seed and Blessed Off-spring , which may ●ake up the Church of Christ in the world , and replenish Heaven with Saints , to shine in Glory , and celebrate the Praises of the Eternal King. I believe all of you are desirous of Dignity , and ambitious of Honour , and here is Honour indeed , to be the Mothers and Nurses of little Angels , Children of the most high , that may reign in Glory , and shin● in Heaven for ever . I believe none of you will say , that you are willing to gratify Satan to bring forth and educate Children to be his Slaves , and Subjects of hi● Kingdom ; who being Enemies to God and his Ways , may carry on the Devil's work in the world , and then 〈◊〉 tormented with him , and howl in Hell for ever . Surely , you will not affirm , that you are willing to go to that place of torment your selves , nor to have any of your Children so unhappy and miserable , as to remain in the burning bottomless Pit to all Eternity . And yet woful Experience doth plainly shew , that many imprudent and fond Parents ( especially Mothers ) are the greatest Enemies to their own Children , and do further their Ruine and Misery more than the Devil , or any other Enemy can do , by gratifying their sens●al Appetites , pleasing their foolish Fancies , satisfying their unreasonable Desires , pampering their corrupt Nature , encouraging them in Vanity and Folly , and perhaps by shewing them bad Examples ; in a word , by giving them their own Will , and with-holding from them that ●ecessary instruction and seasonable correction , ●hich is requisite to the renewing of their co●rup●ed Nature , and bringing them out of a 〈…〉 ate of Sin and Vice , into a State of Holiness ●d Vertue . And by this means , they are fit●ed for Satan's Service , and prepared to com●ly with most of his Temptations . It is most certain , that neither the Devil nor ●e World , can tempt Children , until they be ●apable of yielding and giving their consent . Now if the fi●st buddings of Vice and Wicked●ess springing from the Root of corrupt Na●●re , were timely suppressed and removed , the Root would languish and decay , and Satan ●ould find nothing in them whereupon to fa●en his Temptations , Io. 14. 30. And if the Seeds of true Knowledge , Piety and Vertue , ●ere timely and carefully sown , and duly and diligently watered , the● would be sufficiently ●●rnished against his Assaults , and quali●ied to resist his greatest Temptations , Eph. 6. 11 , 13. Now since Children are born ignorant ( tho' ●ot innocent ) they must be taught and in●●ructed , they must know their Duty before they can do it ; And who can so properly do this as Parents , especially you MOTHERS , who have the immediate management of them i● their Tender Age , who are oftenest with them , have greatest influence upon them , and are most capable to oblige and prevail with them . You who are the causes of their Being , are most obliged to contribute to their well-being . Quest. What Means shall we use ? What Method shall we take ? Answ. 1. Being entred into a Married State , and having diligently and faithfully acquainted your selves with the Duties incumbent upon you in that State ( which God's Word and other good Books do teach ; ) let your chief Design be to honour and glorify God in that holy State which he hath ordained . And by humble Supplication beg his Blessing on the means of his own Appointment , that your Seed and Off-spring may be instruments of his Glory , and Subjects of his Kingdom ; And imitate holy Hannah , 1 Sam. 1. 11. Dedicate unto the Lord what he lends unto you ; and pray that his Grace may sanctifie and prepare it for his Service . 2. When your Child is born , renew your Oblation , dedicate and offer it up to God as a living Holy-Sacrifice , to be employed in his Service , to live to his Honour , and to be under his Protection all the days of its life , Exod. 34. 19. 3. At the time of the Child 's solemn and publick Dedication or Christning , instead of foolish Feasting , Flattering and Pratling , call together some Christian Friends , who may join with you in praising God , for adding a new Member to his Church , and for making you the happy instrument of it ; and in praying to God for the Preservation , Sanctification and Salvation of the Child . 4. If it be possible , carefully nurse the Child ●our self , and let it take its Nourishment ●hence it derived its Substance , that it may be ●holly yours . You may read your Duty in ●his particular , in Ier. Taylor 's Doctrine con●●rning the Virgin Mary's nursing the Holy Child Jesus , in his Book called , The great Examplar . And in the Section concerning Wives , in the Book called , The Ladies Calling . 5. When the dawnings of Reason appears , ●●d Nature begins to shew it self in the Child , ●●en bestir your self , and apply great care and ●iligence in Prayer and Pains , to have the cor●apt Nature rectified , the Image of Satan re●oved , and the divine Nature and Image of God renewed in it . Quest. Are Children destitute of God's 〈…〉 age , and a new Nature ? Answ. Yes ; All the Posterity of Rebelliou● Adam , are guilty a●d polluted , void of good , 〈…〉 d full of evil , Psal. 51. 5. They are shapen in ●quity and conceived in sin , Job . 14. 4. They are 〈…〉 clean branches of a corrupt root , Jo. 3. 6. That ●●ich is born of the flesh , is flesh ; that is , unholy ●●d corrupt , Rom. 8. 8. They that are in the ●lesh , cannot please God , because they are not 〈…〉 ke him , they are not pure and holy . You find , Col. 3. 10. Eph. 4. 24. that th●●●age of God consists in Knowledge , Righte●sness and true Holiness . Now you see , that Children are altogether ●estitute of these Qualifications , and are very averse and backward to learn or acquire them , which Teachers of Youth find by experience . Quest. Have Children the Image of Satan , and a corrupt Nature ? Answ. Yes ; All Adam's Posterity are not only destitute of Righteousness , but inclined to all iniquity , Gen. 6. 5. A Subject capable of two contrary Qualities , must have one of them ; the Air must be either dark or light , Wax must be either hard or soft . The Heart of Mankind must be either good and holy , or else bad and wicked , it must be ei●her for God or against him . Now God's Word tells us , Rom. 8. 7. The carnal mind is enmity against God , and is no● subject to his Law. And indeed no worse can● be in the Devil , than Enmity against God , and Rebellion against his Laws . We are not only Strangers , but Enemies to God , Psal. 58. 3. Rom. 5. 10. But the depraved and corrupted Nature in Children , appears in several particulars . 1. They are altogether ignorant and destitute of Knowledge , a thick cloud of darkness overspreads their Understanding , Eph. 4. 18. They are wholly unacquainted with the natural as well as the positive Law of God , and unwilling to use means , or take pains to know the same . 2. Pride and Self-conceit appears very early in them ; they love to be flattered , to be called good and pretty ; they are apt to value 〈…〉 emselves upon account of their great or rich 〈…〉 ents , their fine Ornaments or gay Cloath● &c. Now Pride is said to be the first sin 〈…〉 he Devil , and is most contrary to the na 〈…〉 e of God , and abominable in his sight , 〈…〉 Pet. 5. 5. 3. All know how Children are generally in●ined to Lying , Dissimulation and Falshood , 〈…〉 ich plainly shews , that they have too much 〈…〉 the Nature and Image of him who is the 〈…〉 ther of Lyes , Io. 8. 44. 4. All their Passions and Affections are cor●pted and distempered , and far from that 〈…〉 nd , which was in the Lord Jesus , and must 〈…〉 in every Disciple of his , before they can 〈◊〉 saved , Phil. 2. 5. Io. 3. 3. Mat. 18. How 〈…〉 ward are Children to Anger , Hatred , Ma●e , Envy , Revenge , Quarreling , Fighting , 〈…〉 enging themselves on those that wrong 〈…〉 m , domineering over those they can Con●er ? How much are they inclined to sensual 〈…〉 tish Pleasures , Vanity , Folly and Trifling ? 〈…〉 w prone are they to Fretting , Murmuring , 〈…〉 ishness and Discontent , if their Humours 〈◊〉 not pleased , and their Appetites satisfied ? 〈◊〉 these are plain indications , that their na●e is wholly Evil , and directly contrary to 〈◊〉 innocent , patient , meek , humble and holy 〈…〉 ure , which appeared in our Lord Jesus 〈…〉 rist , Mat. 11. 29. 1 Pet. 2. 21 , 22 , 23. 5. That Faculty the Will , is basely 〈…〉 rupted and and depraved , which plainly appears in Children , by their Stubbornness , Perverseness , Wilfulness , Untractableness , Unplyableness and Disobedience . If Childrens Will were not restrained by something without them , they would soon run into Ruine . 6. Their Memory ( that Treasury of the Soul , ) is corrupted and vitiated . How soon do they forget good Instructions , Admonitions and Advices ; yea , their own Promises and Resolutions ? How apt are they to remember Trifles , Folly , Play and Vanity ? 7. Their continuing in this black and miserable State , when they come to years , their willingness to squander away time in idleness , play or wickedness , and their backwardness to go to School , to yield or hearken to the instructions of Parents and Teachers ; their unwillingness to go to Church , and their unattentiveness there , doth plainly declare , That they are not only under the dominion of Sin and Satan , but that they are willing Slaves to that ●oul Spirit ; and delight to do the Devil's Drudgery , rather than to serve the high and holy God in Spirit and Truth . Doth not all this shew , that Children have need of early Care and diligent Education ? Now if you , Parents , patiently permit them to run on in their natural Course , and do not timely and diligently use means to convert and reclaim them , you consent to their Sin and Wickedness , and declare your willingness , tha● they be miserable for ever . But if you en●ourage them in their Vices , and smile upon 〈…〉 eir Follies ; if you feed their Lusts and please 〈…〉 eir Humours , if you give them their Will 〈…〉 nd approve their Cunning , if you pamper and 〈…〉 eck their Bodies , put Mony in their Pockets , & 〈…〉 ovide Portions for them , to feed their sensual 〈…〉 esires ; then you forward their Damnation , 〈…〉 ou side with Satan to make them miserable , 〈…〉 d you put Weapons in their hands , whereby 〈…〉 ey may rebel against the King of Heaven . Tho' you do not think this , nor believe it 〈…〉 hen it is told you , yet your Practice speaks it , 〈…〉 d the Event often declares it . And it is not 〈…〉 obable , that you can be acquitted , when you 〈…〉 tribute so much to the condemnation of 〈…〉 ur Children . Many of you complain much of your Chil●ens Ignorance , Negligence , Idleness , Diso 〈…〉 dience and Extravangancy . Truly , when I 〈…〉 sider their Education , I nothing wonder 〈…〉 t they walk in the way which they have 〈…〉 en accustomed to , and obey that Master whose 〈…〉 ice they love best , Ier. 13. 23. Io. 8. 44. If your Children prove your cross and af 〈…〉 tion , blame your selves , who are the prin 〈…〉 al Causes , by neglecting timely Instruction 〈…〉 prudent Correction , and perhaps by gi 〈…〉 g them bad Example . And if you smart 〈…〉 der the Rod of your own preparing and 〈…〉 serving , do not complain , but seriously re 〈…〉 t and speedily amend . For as you are the Causes of your Childrens Being , so should you be of their Well-being ; as you contribute to their natural life , so should you to their spiritual : As God has made them yours by natural Generation , so should you endeavour to make them his by vertuous and religious Education . They are a Trust committed to your Charge by our heavenly Father , who will surely call you to account . As for you , whose Children have more Years than Vertue , and do follow their own Will more than the Will of God , I leave you to the advice of Spiritual Guides , or Civil Magistrates , according to the Command , Deut. 21. 18. But as for you who have , or may have young Children , be careful to observe these Rules , and you may easily rule them , and reap good Fruit and Comfort for your Labour . 1. Speak Truth and no Lies to your Children ; that is , whatever you teach them , see that you practice it your selves ; otherwise they will not believe that you are in earnest , nor listen to your Dictates . Few words will suffice , where there is a continual good Example . Therefore let every Christian Duty as well as Moral Vertue , be your daily Practice . 2. Love your Children prudently , and do not hate them effectually . Fond and foolish love , proves to be the greatest hatred , Prov. 13. 24. Away with that fond and foolish , hurtful and childish Flattering , Hugging , Caressing and Dandling of Children , that is usual , which lessens your Authority , tickles their Fancy , and feeds their Folly. Make not Idols of your Children ; they are God's gifts , make them not his Rivals ; set them not up in his Throne , lest he pull them down , and punish you , either by taking them from you , or making them your cross and scourge . Therefore love your Children piously , and let the Fruits and Effects of it , appear in promoting their spiritual Good. 3. Feed , but do not poison your Children . God has given them sive Senses , but has left it to you to regulate the Objects . Let them neither see nor hear any thing , that may corrupt their Mind or Fancy . Do not poison their Eyes with seeing any base , wicked or foolish Action , till they be fortified against it , and capable to reprove and abhor it . Do not poison their Ears with hearing any wicked , vain or idle words , till they be able to tes●i●ie against them , and r●buke the Tongue that speaks them . For Children are capable to think as soon as to see , and to form Idea's as soon as to hearken . They are capable to remember , before they can judge or determine . Therefore let them hear none speak , who have not learned the Language of Canaan ; and let them converse with none , but those who are acquainted with the Lord Jesus , and can help to make them so . Let the Streets and Publick Places be an abomination unto them , until Holiness to the Lord be written on the Foreheads of all who walk there . 4. Seasonably and gently bow their IronSinew , before it become too strong ; that is , make their Will plyable . Teach them to be denyed , and to deny themselves : Let them not know , that you give them their Will in any thing : Humour them not in any thing they cry for : And let them have what is fit at another time , rather than when they call for it . If you let them have their own Will , they will soon torment you , and ruine themselves . An unbridled Will , makes an ungovernable Person . But when you have effectually and prudently brought the Will into good subjection and order , more than the half of your work is done . 5. Throw water on their Wild Fire , that is , let not Passions prevail : Let Frowns , Rebukes and Rods , curb , restrain and suppress their immoderate Passions and irregular Desires : Let Discipline chastise and keep in order these Wild Beasts , till Reason be able to tame them : Let them know by your Countenance and Behaviour , that Patience , Meekness and Sobriety , are lovely and commendable Vertues . Beware of giving bad Example here . 6. Regulate their Diet ; nourish their Bodies , but do not pamper them : Let them know that Temperance is a Vertue , and that Fasting is Physick : Let their Food be course and plain , for Strength and Nourishment , not for pleasing the sensual Appetite : And as soon as possible , let them gain their Bread by the Sweat of their Brow , according the Command , Gen. 3. 19. 2 Thes. 3. 10. 7. Moderate their Apparel , and do not feed their ●ide : Adorn their Minds before you deck their Bodies : ●●ch them the use of ●loaching , and let Gaudiness be 〈◊〉 Abomination to them : Suffer them not to be proud 〈◊〉 that which covers their Shame . 8. Moderate their Recreations ; let them never be ●e , and let every thing they do be useful and instructive , ●●pen their Reason and inform their Judgment . 9. When they are capable of being instructed , then ●ch them first by the Ear , before you make a Book ●ir Burden : Let them have a good Treasure of sound 〈◊〉 useful Truths in their Memory , and be able to answer ●any Questions , before you ●ix their Eyes upon a let● 〈◊〉 And that ye may build them high in Faith and Ho●●ss , be careful to lay a sure and solid Foundation : 〈◊〉 therefore , let Humility be the first Vertue that you ●●t in them . And for this end , make them acquaint●●ith themselves : Let them know , That they are 〈◊〉 degenerate Off-spring o● sinful Adam ; shew them the ●●ption of their Nature in all the parts of it ; what 〈◊〉 ought to have been , and what they are in their cor●ed State. Make known to them the Purity and Ho●●ss of God's Nature and Law , and that every sin is an ●ence against God , and a Transgression of his Law : 〈◊〉 them the Evil of Sin , and the dreadful consequents 〈◊〉 , that every Sin deserves Death and Damnation , and 〈◊〉 this is due to them , because they are Sinners , guilty 〈◊〉 unclean Creatures , Enemies to God by nature , and ●●els against his just and holy Laws : Let them know , ●t whatever good they receive and enjoy , is purely 〈◊〉 God's Free Grace and Bounty , and not of their own ●●●ving ; and that it is of God's great Mercy , Patience 〈◊〉 Long-suffering , that they are not thrown into Hell ●ady . 10. When you have thus awakened their Minds , con●●ed their Judgments , humbled their Hearts , and sof●● their Spirits , then ●ou may make known to them , 〈◊〉 Lord Jesus Christ , the only Saviour , his Person , his ●●ures , Mediation and Offices , and what way he is given for Mankind , offered unto them , and must be received by them , in order to their Reconciliation with God : Shew them the Doctrine of the Covenant of Grace , and the Method and Terms of Salvation , and what is the nature and extent of that Holiness , which is absolutely necessary to fit them for Glory and Happiness , Heb. 12. 14. Teach them to understand the Person , the Offices , the Dictates , Motions and Operations of the Holy Ghost the Sanctifier and Comforter . Teach them to understand the nature and manner of the Temptations of their spiritual Enemies , and how to resist and overcome them . Make them acquainted with the Doctrine and Duty of Prayer ; and oblige them to pray by themselves , not by a formal repeating of Words , but expressing the humble and hearty desires of their Souls , from a sense of their own wants of God's Goodness and gracious Promises , of Christ's Merits and Mediation , and of the Holy Spirit 's Assistance and Intercession ; and teach them to trust in God , and wait for a return of their Prayers ; and in every thing to be thankful to him . Particularly teach them to believe in , to prize , esteem and love the Lord Jesus Christ , as the Fountain and Foundation of all the Blessings and Benefits which they enjoy and expect , Io. 14. 6. and that they are bound in Covenant with him by their Baptism . 11. Being thus instructed and prepared , it will be easy for you to teach them to Read ; and to understand the Word Preached , for their further Edification , and to inform their Judgment , and excite their Practice in all the Parts of Publick Worship . And when they are examined and approved by the Governours of the Church , they may be admitted to renew their Covenant with God publickly and solemnly at the Lord's Table . 12. When they are thus prepared , fenced and fortified , by the pious care and faithful diligence of Parents , and especially of you MOTHERS , then may they go abroad , and be sent to School to learn Languages , Arts and Sciences , and such Accomplishments as are requisite and useful for them ; which they will easily attain to , 〈◊〉 the Mind is so enlightned in the Knowledge of 〈◊〉 ● there I shall leave them to the Conduct of faith●●chers : But do not you leave them , while life lasts . 〈◊〉 However you may be pleased with your Childrens ●●●●dings , yet never flatter them ; never commend 〈◊〉 , till they really deserve it : Never call them good , 〈◊〉 be effectually so ; tell them that Perfection is 〈◊〉 Duty , and that yet they are far from it , but must ●●rance to higher degrees of Grace and Holiness . Now , MOTHERS , these are some hints of that 〈◊〉 you ought to do for the Sanctification and Salva● of your Children . This is no matter of indifferency , 〈◊〉 your indispensable Duty , ( Prov. 1. 8. and 6. 20. ) ●●●ore neglect it not ; it cannot be done in a short time , 〈◊〉 little pains , therefore delay it not ; but begin 〈◊〉 , and proceed diligently ; and endeavour to obtain 〈◊〉 Honour of being the happy Instruments of a glori●●● Reformation in England ; and may all your endea●●●● be crowned with happy Success . 〈◊〉 It is not good to burthen Children , and break 〈◊〉 Spirits with too much Religion ; it raises Prejudi●●● in them , and gives them false Notions and apprehen●● of God and Religion . 〈◊〉 Surely , this Language proceeds from the Devil this greatest Instruments , because it is so directly con●y to the Dictates of God's holy Spirit , Prov. 22. 6. 〈◊〉 a Child in the way he should go , and when he is old , 〈◊〉 depart from it , Eccl. 12. 1. Remember thy Grea●● the days of thy Youth , &c. 2 Tim. 3. 15. Timothy i●●●mended for knowing the Holy Scriptures from a 〈◊〉 , whereby he was made wise unto Salvation . 〈◊〉 . We have not leisure to take all this care and 〈◊〉 upon our Children . 〈◊〉 . You find leisure to beger , nurse , feed and cloath 〈◊〉 ; to take care of the Body ; and will you neglect 〈◊〉 Soul ? He who gives you time , and all that you en 〈…〉 appoints you this Work , and will reward you ac●●ing to your management of it . Therefore let nothing be a hindrance now , which cannot excuse you at that ● of Account . Yea , let compassion to the Fruit of your ● dies , be a forcible motive to excite your diligent ● zealous endeavour , for its Sanctification and Salvat ● And when you have done your utmost , still acknowle●●● your selves unprofitabls Servants , and that all you'● done , is to no purpose , without the sanctifying Grac● 〈◊〉 the HolySpirit . Therefore continue your earnest Sup●cations to the good and gracious God , the giver of ev● good Gift , that he would give his Holy Spirit , to m● your Labours successful and effectual ; and the Rig●ousness of his beloved Son , to make your Endeavour● 〈◊〉 ceptable with him . Therefore , tho' you ought , and 〈◊〉 obliged to use every Mean of his Appointment , yet 〈◊〉 to no Mean , rely upon none of your Performances , 〈◊〉 all your dependance be upon the Lord Jesus Christ ; beg the Spirit of Christ for your Assistance , and the 〈◊〉 rits of Christ for your Acceptance : And in every th● give Thanks and Praise to God the Father , Son 〈◊〉 Holy Ghost . FINIS . 
A25834	----	Secret and family prayers with brief helps for the more devout receiving of the Lords-Supper And better observation of the Lords-day, as also to further the needfull duties of catechizing, visiting the sick, and personal instruction. Fitted for the use and benefit of the inhabitants of Cartmel in Lancashire. Armstrong, John, 1634 or 5-1698. 1677 Approx. 141 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 56 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2006-02 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A25834 Wing A3708A ESTC R214879 99826932 99826932 31344 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A25834) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 31344) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 1901:14) Secret and family prayers with brief helps for the more devout receiving of the Lords-Supper And better observation of the Lords-day, as also to further the needfull duties of catechizing, visiting the sick, and personal instruction. Fitted for the use and benefit of the inhabitants of Cartmel in Lancashire. Armstrong, John, 1634 or 5-1698. [14], 97, [1] p. printed by J. Hayes, for the author, Cambridge : 1677. Attributed in Wing to John Armstrong. Signed on p. [14]: J.A. Reproduction of original in the Cambridge University Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. 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Prayer -- Early works to 1800. 2005-08 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2005-09 Apex CoVantage Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2005-12 John Latta Sampled and proofread 2005-12 John Latta Text and markup reviewed and edited 2006-01 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion Secret and Family PRAYERS With brief Helps for the more Devout RECEIVING OF THE Lords-Supper . And better Observation of the LORDS-DAY , as also to further the needfull Duties of Catechizing , Visiting the Sick , and Personal Instruction . Fitted for the Use and Benefit of the Inhabitants of Cartmel in Lancashire . If ye know these things , happy are ye if ye do them , S. John 13. 17. CAMBRIDGE , Printed by J. Hayes , for the Author . 1677. June 15. 1677. Imprimatur , Tho. Page Procan . Ri. Minshull . Theoph. Dillingham . Rad. Cudworth . THE PREFACE AND EPISTLE To my loving Neighbours and Pastoral Charge . HAving now for a long time observed not only your frugal , charitable , and industrious way of Living as to the World , but moreover in reference to many of you , your more pious Care for the good Education of your Children , and your own Spiritual Welfare ; as also your maintaining Order and Unity above many others in the Worship of God : this hath been unto me , and I hope shall continue to be the cause of no little joy and contentment of heart . Yet having withall seen some among us hitherto not so diligent as they ought to be , either in keeping holy the Lords Day , or in receiving the Sacrament of the Lords Supper , or in sending for the Minister to visit them when sick , or in improving when in health the duty of Catechising and Personal Instruction , that both themselves and those who live with or under them might be better informed in the Ways of God : I have in the ensuing Book as to each of these respects , hinted those things , which if duely considered , may prove a sutable and seasonable Remedy . And particularly because as to the promoting of Religion in each Houshold , there is a more general want of Family-Prayers , too easie to be taken notice of , I have herein especially endeavoured to make provision for the performance of that part of your Duty . There are I hope but few so negligent of their own Welfare , as not to consider how natural and necessary it is for all reasonable creatures by Prayer and Thanksgiving to acknowledge God in al● their ways , and to give him the Glory du● unto his Name for all the benefits they receive from him , and to seek his Blessing upon what ever they undertake , and daily to recommend themselves and all their concerns to his continued Grace and good Providence . There may be more who having helps put into their hands for this purpose , will not so much as find leasure to make use of them ; as if this would not indeed rather further then hinder their lawfull Affairs ; or as if they could have any greater and weightier business then thus to seek the Lord while he may be found , and call upon him while he is near ; Or as if , when the most in a Family will both find time and get together twice a day for set meals for their Bodies , they should not much rather strive to do so , once at the least , for set and solemn Prayer in order to their Souls eternal Happiness . If your estate be more plentifull you may spare the more time ; if your condition be meaner on Earth , you have more need to seek by Christ a Treasure in Heaven . Say not therefore , you are to provide for Wife and Family , and so have no time to regard your Soul by a solemn and serious performance of Duties ; but remember that the same God who commands you to follow your particular Callings as Men , injoins you likewise to follow your general Callings as Christians , and that in the first place . Seek first the Kingdom of God , and the Righteousness ousness thereof , and all other things shall be added unto you . And also with the greatest labour . S. John 6. 27. Labour not ( i. e. not only ) for the food that perisheth , but ( chiefly ) for the food that endureth to Everlasting Life . Should we pray to God every day in the week not once or twice but many times , for eternall Blessedness , and continue to do so with greatest earnestness , while our life and breath is continued , if but once this Petition at last be granted us , will it not be richly worth our pains , and fully requite all that we have done ? Or having every Work-day in the week 23 hours and an half to eat and drink and work and sleep in , is it any great matter to redeem half an hour or a quarter of an hours time , wherein to work out our Salvation , to prepare our Souls for Death , Judgement and Eternity , to read some portion of Gods Word , and to praise him for the Mercies we have received , and to Pray unto him for such as we have need of ? If a mans house were in a flame he would not let it burn , and say , I have no time to quench it . If a Neighbour call us to sit at our doors , to talk or dine with them we can find leasure for it . When therefore the Blessed God calls upon us to be diligent this way among others to make our Calling and Election sure , should we foolishly say , that we have no time for this , though indeed one of the main Works which we were sent into the World about ! Oh let not such vain excuses keep us from our Duty , lest the Righteous God for our pretending now want of time to serve him in , be provoked at last to give us an Eternity to suffer in . Others , I fear , will be ready to make light of these Helps because of their groundless prejudices against all Book-Prayers , not rightly understanding either their benefit or lawfulness , but I beseech you let it be well considered , how many Christian Duties and Vertues we may be daily put in mind of by these Prayers , which if we strive to follow with answerable Practices , as we ought to do , and as we hereby beg of God to enable us to do ; surely this course must in all reason be allowed to have a very considerable influence into our more Holy and Circumspect Walking . Besides you know how natural it is to all Mankind when they have any petitions or thanks to prefer but to an earthly King , to take good advice beforehand that they may be delivered in as decent and grave form of words , and as reverent a manner as may be ; certainly then Christians in this respect should be much more carefull , if possible , how they present the desires of their Hearts to the most High God , the Eternal Majesty of Heaven and Earth . But alas with many , such have been the licentious Rambles of their fancy in suddain Prayer , so bold and rude have their descriptions been of Almighty God , so rash their Sayings concerning him , or concerning themselves , and so many untrue or doubtfull things have they uttered ; that they have not only shamed that way of address to God , but dishonoured and hindered true Christian Devotion , which hath suffered extremely in the thoughts of many by such extravagance . And some , as experience hath shewn , finding that they could not pray in their Families ex tempore or on the sudden as they have been urged , without many vain repetitions and broken impertinent expressions , have quite left off the Duty it self . T is true some few may attain an habit of uttering their Desires freely and becomingly upon any occasion ; yet the most , though well-minded People , are so defective both in their Conceptions and Utterance , that they greatly need the Assistance which is here offered them , and ought by no means to be discouraged from performing thus safely and piously their known Duty towards God ; especially considering , that when we pray for such things as are contained in the Scriptures which are from the Spirit of God ; and when by the same Blessed Spirit helping our infirmities , we are enabled to Pray for those things fervently and sincerely , we do truly pray by the Gift or Assistance of the Spirit , whether the Prayer we use be written in a Book , or imprinted in the Memory , or suddenly uttered ; and such a Prayer is acceptable unto God who looks not at the outward varied expressions of the Tongue , but the inward holy Affections of the Heart . And so our Saviour pray'd in or by the Spirit , when he repeated the same requests at several times ; and so still do all plain and honest-hearted People , when they devoutly use that form of Prayer which he hath taught us , or any other after that manner judiciously composed . The Prayers , Directions , and Catechisms of the following Book , I have for the most part collected out of several approved Authours of great Judgement , Learning , Piety , and Christian experience , only fitting them with needfull Alterations and Additions for your easier use and benefit . And in the whole you have comprehended those things which make for your greater Holiness here and Happiness hereafter ; which are often more fully explained by the publick Ministry of the Word ; and which agree with the sense of the most and best Christians in the truly Catholick or universall Church , beginning at Jerusalem , and dispersed throughout the whole Christian World. Yet I doubt not but many deceivers and deceived who have cast off the Ordinances of Christ , and lately taken up a new Religion of their own devising , building their Altars of false Worship besides the Altar of the Lord , these will be ready to revile me for my pains , to call me Deceiver , as some did the Apostles themselves , to prate maliciously against me , and to oppose and gainsay what I am doing , that they may hinder your being benefited thereby . But I beseech you , do you hold fast the form of sound Words or Christian Doctrine which you have received in Faith and Love which is in Christ Jesus ; adhere to the Spirit , Ministry , and Ordinances of Christ ; keep in the Communion of his Saints and People ; and as you have the true Religion , so be true unto your Religion by living accordingly , and my Soul for yours , by the Grace of God , you shall not miscarry . Be not offended at the bad lives of some , there will be tares among the good Wheat 'till the Harvest . Be not offended at the errours and heresies of others , of your own selves ( says the Apostle ) shall men arise speaking perverse things to draw away Disciples after them . And again , There must be Heresies among you , that they which be approved may be made manifest among you . There will be unstable and unlearned People who will boldly wrest the Scriptures to their own destruction . But remember how God hath given Pastours and Teachers for the Work of the Ministry , &c. That we henceforth be no more Children tossed to and fro , and carried about with every wind of Doctrine , by the sleight of men and cunning craftiness , whereby they lie in wait to deceive . Therefore be not carried about with divers and strange Doctrines , for it is a good thing that the heart be established with Grace . Hold fast the Profession of your Faith without wavering . Mark them that cause Divisions and avoid them . Let not your soul come into their secret out of Curiosity , least when you forsake his ways , God justly forsake your Understandings , and leave you to your selves , and so you be led by your corrupt Natures , to close sooner with that which is evil then with that which is good . And if at any time you cannot fully answer such objections as cunning Deceivers may make against any thing contained in this Book , or in our holy Religion , do not ( as some have done ) therefore presently turn to them without any more ado ; do not think that because you cannot answer them , that no body else can ; do not suffer your selves and your Religion to be so soon , so sadly and shamefully parted ; but in the name of God I most humbly and most earnestly beseech you , take the pains to acquaint me with them , or with my consent and assistance to consult such faithfull and able Ministers of Christ , as will help you most clearly to see the weakness and falshood of those arguments which so much puzled you before . Remember I beseech you , that this is the advice of one whom God by his gracious Providence and Holy Spirit hath made your Overseer and the Guide of your Souls ; of one who hath the same care for your Salvation that he hath for his own ; Who can as truly rejoyce to see the fruit of his labours in your Holy Walking ; as you can to reap a plentifull Harvest after your Labours , or to see your Children do well according to your care and trouble about them . Of one concerning whom with others Christ hath said , He that heareth you heareth me , and he that despiseth you despiseth me . Remember that this is the advice of one who is always near you , and is in some measure acquainted with your Condition and is ever ready to direct and assist you as your Necessities shall require . Remember that this is the advice of one who is devoted to the Work of the Ministry and the Service of your Souls , and so may more reasonably then others that are not so set apart , expect , ( as it is his daily Prayer ) to be led of God in the ways of Truth and Holiness that he may lead you in them to , and to be blessed of God that he may be made a Comfort and a Blessing unto you . Remember further that this is the Advice of one who having lived long among you , sincerely loves you , and hath no other design upon you , but by all Good means to promote your Happiness , and to prevent your utter Undoing ; of one lastly , who is ready to spare neither Cost nor Pains for your real Good , as in other things , so in helping you to practice what is contained in this Book , which I intreat you to accept of and to use as a testimony of my Unfeigned Desires of your Eternal welfare , recommending both it and you to the Blessing and Protection of Almighty God , and ever remaining Your Servant for Christs sake J. A. Eph. 6. 18 , 19. Praying always , with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit , and Watching thereunto with all Perseverance and Supplication for all Saints . And for me , &c. S. Mat. 26. 41. Watch and pray , that ye enter not into temptation . Jer. 10. 25. Pour out thy fury upon the Heathen that have not known thee , and upon the Families that call not on thy Name . S. Mat. 6. 6. But thou when thou prayest , enter into thy closet , and when thou hast shut thy door , pray to thy Father which is in secret , and thy Father who seeth in secret , shall reward thee openly . 1 Cor. 11. 26 , 27 , 28. For as often as ye eat this Bread and drink this Cup , ye do shew the Lords death till he come . Wherefore , whosoever shall eat this Bread and drink this Cup unworthily , shall be guilty of the Body and Blood of the Lord. But let a Man examine himself , and so let him eat of that Bread and drink of that Cup. S. Luke 22. 19 , 20. And he took Bread , and gave thanks , and brake it , and gave unto them , saying , this is my Body which is given for you , this do in remembrance of me . Likewise also the Cup after Supper , saying , This Cup is the New Testament in my Blood , which is shed for you . We may sometime begin our Closet Prayers admiring with S. Augustine Gods glorious Perfections . WHAT art thou O my God ? what art thou I beseech thee , but the Lord my God ? for who is Lord besides our Lord , or who is God besides our God ? O thou Supreme , most powerfull , most mercifull , most just , most secret , most present , most beautifull , most incomprehensible ; most constant and yet changing all things ; immutable , never new , and never old , and yet renewing all things , ever in Action , yet ever at rest , heaping up , yet needing nothing ; creating , upholding , filling , protecting , nourishing , and perfecting all things . Thou lovest , and yet thou art not transported ; thou art angry , yet never art unquiet ; thou art jealous , yet void of fear ; thou dost repent , yet art thou free from sorrow ; Thou requirest profit at our hands , yet who hath any thing but of thy Gift ? Thou payest debts when thou owest nothing ; Thou forgivest debts and yet thou loosest nothing . And what shall I say , O my God , my life , my joy , my holy dear delight ? or what can any Man say when he speaketh of Thee ? and wo be to them that speak not of Thee , but are silent in thy Praise ; for even they who speak most of Thee , may be accounted to be but dumb . Have mercy upon me O Lord , that I may speak unto thee , and praise thy Name . Amen . A Prayer for all Conditions of Men. Note that one alone may say , We , and Our , and Us , as usually in the Lords Prayer , because of the Communion of Saints . O God the Creator and Preserver of all Mankind , we humbly beseech thee for all sorts and conditions of Men , that thou wouldest be pleased to make thy ways known unto them , thy Saving Health unto all Nations . More especially we pray for the good estate of the Catholick Church ; that it may be so guided and governed by thy good Spirit , that all who profess and call themselves Christians , may be led into the way of Truth , and hold the Faith in unity of Spirit , in the bond of Peace , and in Righteousness of life . And we also commend unto thy Fatherly Goodness all those who are any ways afflicted or distressed in Mind , Body , or Estate , that it may please thee to comfort and relieve them according to their severall necessities , giving them Patience under their Sufferings , and an happy Issue out of all their Afflictions , and this we beg for Jesus Christ his sake . Amen . A Prayer for the King and Kingdom . ANd that in one Blessing we may all of us be blest , I beseech thee , O thou who art the Maker and Saviour of all Kings and Nations of the earth , to bless our dread Soveraign Lord King CHARLES with the richest Blessings of thy Grace . Strengthen him with the faith of Abraham , endue him with the mildness of Moses , arm him with the magnanimity of Joshua , exalt him with the humility of David , assist him with the counsel of Hushai , beautifie him with the wisdom of Solomon , and replenish him with the Goodness and Holiness of them all ; that so he may be a powerfull Protector of his People , a religious Defender of thy sacred Faith , a bountifull comforter of thy Holy Church , a glorious Triumpher over all his enemies , a gracious Governour of all his Subjects , and a happy Father of children to rule this Nation by Succession in all ages . O let his Reign be prosperous , and his Days many ; let Peace and Plenty , Love and Piety , Justice and Truth , and all Christian vertues flourish in his time . Let his People serve him with honour and obedience ; and let him so love and serve Thee here on Earth , that he may hereafter everlastingly reign with Thee in Heaven through Jesus Christ our Lord. Here may be added the Prayers or Thanks-givings in the Book of Common Prayer upon their severall Occasions . Sometimes also the Creed may be repeated with that pithy Ejaculation said before it , [ Lord I believe help my unbelief ] And the Ten Commandments , with that short Prayer after them , Lord have mercy upon us , and write all these thy Laws in our Hearts we beseech thee . Here also may be said the Morning or Evening Collect respectively , on our own , and the behalf of those that belong to us . O Lord our Heavenly Father , Almighty and Everlasting God , who hast safely brought us to the beginning of this Day , defend us in the same with thy Mighty Power , and grant that this Day we fall into no sin , neither run into any kind of danger , but that all our doings may be ordered by thy Governance , to do alwaies that which is righteous in thy sight through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . Lighten our darkness we beseech thee , O Lord , and by thy great Mercy defend us from all perils and dangers of this Night for the love of thy Son , our Saviour Jesus Christ . Amen . A general Thanksgiving . O Most gracious God , I give thee humble and hearty Thanks for all thy Goodness and Loving kindness to me and to all men . I bless thee for my Creation , Preservation , and all the Blessings of this life ; but above all for thine inestimable love in the Redemption of the World by our Lord Jesus Christ ; for the means of Grace and for the hope of Glory . And I beseech thee give me that due sense of all thy Mercies , that my heart may be unfeignedly thankfull , and that I may set forth thy Praise , not only with my lips , but in my life , by giving up my self to thy Service , and by walking before thee in Holiness and Righteousness all my days , through Jesus Christ my Lord ; to whom with Thee and the Holy Ghost be all honour and glory , world without end . Amen . A devout Prayer which may be used at any time by one alone . GRant me O gracious Lord in what lawfull undertaking soever , a pure intention of Heart , and a stedfast regard of thy Glory ; let Christ be my pattern , thy Word my rule , and thy Spirit my guide in all that I do . Possess ( I beseech thee ) and ravish my mind continually with thy Love , and let my delight always be to be embraced in the Arms of thy protection . Be thou , O holy God , light unto mine eyes , musick to mine ears , sweetness to my tast , and a full contentment to my heart . Be thou my Sunshine in the day , my food at the table , my repose in the night , my Cloathing in nakedness , and my succour in all necessities . O Lord Jesus , I give thee my body , my Soul , my substance , my fame , my friends , my liberty , and my life ; Dispose of me and all that is mine , as it seemeth best to Thee , and to the glory of thy blessed Name . I am not now mine but thine , therefore claim me as thy right , and love me as thy Child , and keep me as thy charge , and defend me against those that would deal injuriously with me . My Lord my God , I beseech thee to give me patience in troubles , humility in comforts , constancy in temptation , and Victory over all my ghostly enemies . Grant me sorrow for my Sins , thankfulness for thy Benefits , fear of thy Judgements , love of thy Mercies , and mindfulness of thy Presence for evermore . Make me observant of my Superiours , courteous to my Inferiours , friendly to my Equals , loving to my Friends , and charitable to my Enemies ; Make me ready to pleasure all , and loth to offend any . Give me Chastness in my Affections , modesty in my countenance , gravity in my behaviour , deliberation in my speech , Holiness in my thoughts , and Righteousness in all my ways . Let thy Mercy through Christ cleanse me from the guilt of my transgressions , and let thy Grace bring forth in me the fruits of Everlasting Life . Lord let me be obedient without arguing , humble without feigning , patient without grudging , pure without corruption , merry without lightness , sad without mistrust , sober without dulness , true without doubleness , fearing Thee without desperation , and trusting in Thee without presumption . Let me be joyfull for nothing but that which pleaseth Thee , nor sorrowfull for any thing but that which doth displease Thee . Let my labour be my delight which is for Thee , and let all rest weary me which is not in Thee . Give me an awaking Spirit , and a diligent Soul , that I may seek to know thy Will ; and when I know it truly , may perform it faithfully to the honour and glory of thy ever Blessed Name ; for these and for all other needfull Mercies , which thou , O God , wouldst have me to pray , or to praise Thee , I continue to say , as Christ our Lord hath taught us . Our Father which art , &c. The Blessing . LEt thy Peace , O God , which passeth all understanding ; let the Blessing of the holy undivided Trinity , the Father , Son , and Holy Ghost ; let the vertue of Christs blessed Cross and Passion be with me , and remain with me and mine , now , and at the hour of Death , and to eternall Ages . Amen , Amen . They that have more Leasure may oftner use the foregoing devotions alone Morning , or Evening , or at any time of the Day when they best can . Such also may make use of this following Morning Prayer for a Family on the Week-days , as many as can well be spared being present . A Family-Prayer for the Morning on Work-days . O Most holy and ever blessed Lord God , we thine unworthy Servants do here acknowledge , that as we were born in sin , so we have lived in iniquity , and broken thy righteous Laws in thought , word , and deed , following too much the desires of our own will , and not caring as we ought to be governed by thy Holy Word and Spirit ; but O gracious Father , we beseech thee for the merits of thy Dear Son to forgive us all our sins , and not to inflict upon us those Punishments which are due unto us for them . And do thou we pray Thee sanctifie us throughout in Body , Soul , and Spirit , and lead us in the ways of Truth and Holiness , and make us in every respect such as thou wouldest have us to be . And here , O Lord , from the bottom of our hearts we praise thy Name for all thy Blessings bestowed upon us , concerning this or a better Life ; Particularly we praise Thee for the Mercies of the last Night and this Morning ; that thou hast preserved us from such dangers as might have fallen upon any of us ; and for our Refreshment by moderate rest and sleep . Oh that this Day we may be kept from the evil of Sin , and so , if it may be thy Will , from the evil of Punishment . Enable us to watch over our Thoughts , that good Meditations only may enter into our minds , and Holy desires and purposes into our Hearts . Help us to set a watch before our Mouths , and to keep the door of our Lips that we offend not with our Tongues . Help us also to watch over all our Actions , that we may do hurt to none , but all the good we can to all , as we would have others deal with us , That in all we do thy Word may be our Rule , thy Spirit our Guide , our Saviour our pattern , and thy Glory our end . That we may be wise and modest in our Carriage , temperate and sober in our Diet , diligent and chearfull in our Business ; that we may abide with Thee in our particular Places and Callings by a conscientious performance of the Duties thereof ; that we may undertake nothing upon which we may not desire thy Blessing , and wherein we may not expect thy Direction and Assistance . That we may be crucified to the World , and the World unto us , by the Cross of Christ ; that we may be content with such things as we have , and not use any unlawfull means for our own relief , knowing Thou hast promised , never to leave us nor forsake us . That we may so pass through the things of this Life , that finally we loose not Everlasting Life and Happiness in the enjoyment of thy Self . And all we beg upon the account of Christ , in whose Name we continue to pray unto Thee , saying , Our Father , &c. But because the busie Countrey Life usually on the Week-Days calls and disperses most in Families early in the Morning to their several Works and Imployments ; it is very needfull ( especially when Morning Family-Prayers cannot be had conveniently ) that each one grown to years of Understanding before they go out of their Chambers , or before they begin their Work , should kneel down by themselves , and in short beg Gods Blessing and Presence with them the following Day ; which they may do by the Collect for the Morning It is set down gotten by Heart , saying after it the page the 6. the Lords-Prayer understandingly , devoutly , and deliberately . Or this . PRevent us , O Lord , in all our Doings by thy most gracious Favour , and further us with thy continual Help ; that in all our works begun , continued and ended in Thee , we may glorifie thy holy Name , and finally by thy mercy obtain Everlasting Life through Jesus Christ our Lord. Our Father which art in Heaven , &c. Or in the Morning on the Week-Days you may pray by your self thus . O Most gracious God , and mercifull Father , I thine unworthy servant do here acknowledge , that as I was born in sin , so I have lived in iniquity , and broken thy Righteous Laws in thought word and deed , following too much the desires of my own Will , and not caring as I ought to be governed by thy holy Word and Spirit ; and am therefore liable to all shame and misery both in this Life , and that which is to come . But O Heavenly Father , I beseech Thee for the Merits of thy dear Son to forgive me all my sins , and not to inflict that punishment which is due unto me for them . And send thy Holy Spirit into my heart , which may assure me , that thou art my reconciled Father , and that thou lovest me with an unchangeable Love. And let the same thy good Spirit lead me in the ways of Truth and Righteousness , and crucifie in me more and more all worldly and carnall lusts . * And here , O Lord , from the bottom of my heart , I thank Thee for all thy Blessings bestowed upon my Soul or Body . * [ Particularly for any measure of Refreshment given unto me the Night past , and that thou hast brought me safe to the light of another Day . ] * O Lord , I pray Thee continue to be gracious unto me ; let thy Fear be always before my eyes , and thy Grace so rule in my heart , that whatever I shall think , speak , or do , may tend to thy Glory , the Good of others , and the peace of my own Conscience . I now recommend my self , and all my concerns , together with all near Relations and those that belong unto me , to thy mercifull Direction and Protection , intreating Thee to keep us from all evil , and to give a Blessing to all our honest and lawfull Endeavours , and to make all thy Providences towards us to work together for our good . * Bless , O Lord , the Kings Majesty and all the Royal Family , with all inferiour Magistrates under Him. Bless the Bishops and Pastors of the Church . Comfort all that are sick and comfortless . And O Lord , keep me in a continual readiness by Faith and Repentance for my last end , that whether I live or die , I may be thine , accepted of Thee through Christ Jesus my only Saviour , in whose prevailing Name I sue for these and all other needfull Graces and Mercies , & continue to pray unto Thee , as he himself hath taught me , saying , Our Father , &c. Praying alone , unless removed out of the hearing of others , speak with a whispering rather then a loud Voice , as Hannah did 1 Sam. 1. 13. She spake in her heart , onely her lips moved , but her voice was not heard . Thus , not being heard of others , they cannot suspect you to affect any vain glory in what you do . Yet you will find this way usefull both to stir up your Affections , and to help your Attention of Mind , by keeping you from many wandring and distracting thoughts which you would otherwise be liable unto . Note further , that when alone in Secret you may sometimes makeless use of a set Form of Prayer , and take more freedom in opening your Heart and particular Condition unto God as he shall enable you . He knows , and will graciously answer your humble and sincere desires . Greater heed is to be taken for Method and Expression when we pray with others that they may joyn with us to their Edification . At Evening on the Week-Days when the Family is come together , at the fittest time before they go to their Rest , let the Governours themselves , or some Child or Servant whom they shall appoint , reading first some portion of Scripture if they have time , distinctly and leasurely read one of the two following Prayers . A Family-Prayer for the Evening on the Week-Days . O Lord , the Creator of the World , and the Redeemer of Mankind , who knowest all things , and canst do what thou pleasest , and hast done us very much Good already , and promised to do more for us , if we be obedient , then we can ask or think ; we here fall down before Thee in the lowest manner , to express our fear and reverence to thy Almighty Power ; our admiration of and submission to thy unsearchable Wisdom ; our hearty love , and thankfull acknowledgment of thy wondrous Goodness ; our trust and confidence in thy Faithfull Promises ; with our ready and sincere purposes to perform all Obedience to thy holy Commands . There is nothing , O Lord , so afflictive to us , as the remembrance that we have at any time offended thy Sovereign Authority . We are heartily sorry for the breaking any of thy Righteous and Good Laws , and therefore beseech Thee for the sake of Christ to pardon the same unto us , and that we may abhor the thoughts of doing so again , ever resolving by thy Assistance to deny all ungodliness and worldly lusts , and to live Righteously , Soberly , and Godly in this present World ; and to strive to be like our Saviour Christ in meekness and lowliness of Spirit , in Purity and Zeal for thy Worship and Glory , and in being ready as we have opportunity , to take the more pains that we may do the more good in the World. Oh do thou , we pray thee , strengthen in us these resolutions which thou hast inspired us withall , and ever further them by thy continued Grace , that no sudden desires , ineffectual purposes , or partial performances , may deceive or lead us into a false Opinion of our selves ; but that we may bring forth actually , and with a constant Spirit , all the fruits of Righteousness which are by Christ Jesus , to the Praise and Glory of thee our God. O let us be so sensible of thy great kindness to us , & of our many engagements unto Thee , that we may love thee our God and Saviour with all our heart , soul , and strength ; that we may strive to credit our Religion , and glorifie thy Name all the ways we are able , with all that we are , have , or can do ; that not only by the special Duties of thy Worship , but also by the right management of our outward Affairs , and our moderate use of the good things of this Life , we may serve Thee , and be brought nearer unto Thee . Thus we pray Thee let Religion be the very business of our lives , and let our greatest pleasure be to please Thee in every thing , and our highest design to attain that Blessed Immortality which Christ Jesus hath promised . Lift up our affections , we intreat Thee , more and more to those things above where He is ; that Heaven may have our hearts while this World hath our bodies ; and we may have perfect Contentment of mind in Well-doing , and patient suffering ; and the good hope we have of being eternally beloved of Thee the Lord of Heaven and Earth , may make us rejoyce evermore . Free us , O Lord , from all inordinate cares for the things of this Life ; from all distrust of thy good Providence ; from all repining at any thing that befalls us ; and enable us in every thing to give Thanks ; believing that all things are ordered by the greatest Wisdom , and shall work together for the good of those that love Thee . We doubt not of thy Fatherly Affection to those that study in all sincerity to approve themselves unto Thee ; and therefore still resolve to leave our selves entirely to thy wise Counsels , that thou mayst dispose us into such a condition as thou seest best in this World. Oh remember us but of our Duty ; quicken and excite us to it ; strengthen us in the doing of it ; support us under all discouragements ; advise us in all difficult cases ; and comfort us with a stedfast Belief of thy holy Word ; and we shall ever be giving thanks and praise unto Thee who dealest so bountifully with us . Moreover with our selves we desire , O Lord , the good of all Mankind , especially that thou wouldest be mercifull to thy whole Church , and particularly that thou wouldest bless that part of it which is planted in these Nations wherein we live ; inclining the hearts of all Ranks and Degrees of Men amongst us to follow after things which make for Peace , Unity , and Godliness . But O gracious God , as we are in duty bound in a more peculiar manner , we do most earnestly beseech Thee , on the behalf of this place of our Abode , that our Minister being directed and assisted by Thee , may be made a Blessing and a Comfort unto us ; and that we likewise having our Conversation as becomes the Gospel of Christ , may be a Blessing and an Encouragement unto him . Give , we pray Thee , repentance unto Sinners , and increase of Grace and Strength to all thy faithfull Servants ; Reduce those among us that wander out of the way ; raise up those that are fallen ; confirm and settle those that stand , and grant them a stedfast Resolution to persevere in Faith , Love , and Obedience . Relieve and comfort all those that are in any Distress ; make the Earth to bring forth her increase in due season ; and let all honest and industrious People be succeeded and blessed in their Labours . Remember all those who are nearly related to us , or to whom we are indebted for our Birth , Education , Instruction , or Promotion ; Thou who art rich in Mercy reward and recompence their care and love . Grant Forgiveness and Charity to all our Enemies ; Continue good will among all our kind Neighbours . Assist those that are Dying and leaving this World , and fit their Souls for a better Place ; and let us also with them after our own last sickness , in due time through Christ , obtain a glorious Resurrection and Eternal Life . And here , O Lord , we do from our very Souls render unto Thee most humble and hearty thanks for all thy Blessings and Benefits bestowed upon us concerning this Life and that which is to come ; but more especially we praise Thee for the mercies of this day ; for any measure of success thou hast given us in our lawfull Endeavours ; that thou hast defended us from such dangers as might have fallen upon us . We beseech Thee likewise of thine infinite Goodness and Mercy , to defend and protect us and all that belong unto us this Night ; and let us be refreshed with moderate rest and sleep , and so raised the next Day more able and willing to set forth thy Glory , in the conscionable Duties of our Places and Callings . These and all other needfull Mercies , we ask of Thee for the alone merits of Jesus Christ , in whose Name we continue to pray unto Thee as he himself hath taught us , saying , Our Father , which art in Heaven , hallowed be thy Name , thy Kingdom come , thy Will be done in Earth as it is in Heaven , give us this day our daily Bread , and forgive us our Trespasses , as we forgive them that trespass against us , and lead us not into Temptation , but deliver us from evil , for thine is the Kingdom , and the Power , and the Glory for ever and ever . Thy Grace , O Lord Jesus Christ , thy love O Heavenly Father , thy comfort and consolation O holy and blessed Spirit be with us , and remain with us this night and for evermore , Amen . Another Family-Prayer for the Evening on the Week-Days , Saturday especially . O Most blessed and eternall God , thou alone art the fountain of our Happiness , and the rest and satisfaction of our Souls . Thou art infinitely more great and glorious in thy Wisdom , Power , and Goodness , then either our words can declare , or our hearts can conceive . We therefore thine unworthy Servants do here most humbly adore and worship thine incomprehensible Majesty ; acknowledging that we were not only born in sin , but in the course of our Lives have violated thy Sacred Laws , and many ways transgressed our Duty as to Thee , our Neighbours , and our Selves ; so that if Thou shouldest deal with us according to the strictness of thy Justice and our own deservings , we could expect nothing but shame and misery , both in this life and that which is to come . But , O God , we beseech Thee do thou help us penitently and believingly to cast our selves upon thy Mercy , and the Merits of Jesus Christ ; and for his sake graciously forgive unto us the sinfulness of all our thoughts , words , and ways , and let thy Spirit witness with ours the comfortable assurance of that Forgiveness . And for the future , let us not be tempted by the allurements or discouragements of the World , wilfully to allow our selves in the omission of any the least known Duty , or in the Commission of any the least known Sin. And because this is thy Will even our sanctification , we beseech Thee , O Lord , that thou wouldest sanctifie our Understandings , that being renewed in the Spirit of our Minds , we may have a Spiritual Discerning of the things of Thee our God ; that we may know what it is that Thou requirest of us , in those several Places , Conditions and Relations Thou art pleased to set us in . That Thou wouldest likewise enable us to submit our wills to thy Blessed Will in all things ; and to make it our daily care and exercise to keep our Consciences clear and unreproveable in thy sight . That Thou wouldest help us to set our Affections upon things above ; that we may love thee the Lord our God with all our Heart , and with all our Soul , and with all our Strength ; and that Christ may be the Chiefest of ten thousands unto us , Him whom our Soul loves . That we may present our Bodies a living Sacrifice , holy and acceptable unto Thee , which is but our reasonable Service . That so being sanctified throughout , we may be whatsoever Thou wouldest have us to be ; that we may leave whatsoever thou wouldest have us to forsake ; that we may patiently suffer whatsoever Thou layest upon us to endure ; that we may freely , cheerfully , and readily do whatsoever thy Command obligeth us to do . And because Thou requirest that we should grow in Grace by all those means of Grace and Salvation which Thou art pleased so plentifully to vouchsafe unto us , Oh that Thou wouldest help us to walk yet more holily in respect of Thee our God then ever ; that we may be more fearfull of offending Thee , and more solicitous to please Thee then ever we have yet been ; being more wisely zealous and active for thy Glory , and more reverent in the use of all things that relate unto Thee . That thou wouldest give us an universal Good Will towards others in the World ; that we may love our Neighbours as our Selves , and love even our Enemies for thy sake ; and be more carefull that we do hurt unto none , but deal justly and mercifully towards all , as we would that they should do unto us . That thou wouldest help us to perform more and better then ever those Duties which we owe unto our selves ; that we may live yet more in the exercise of Meekness , of Humility , of Temperance and Contentedness of Mind . Thus , O Lord , that thou wouldest help us to serve Thee all our days in the Uptightness of our Hearts , improving all opportunities of doing and receiving Good ; preparing for our great Change from time to Eternity ; and in every respect , by a constant watchfulness over all our Thoughts , Words , and Actions , so behaving our selves , as those that know and stedfastly believe , that we have Thee an everliving God to serve , that we have precious and Immortal Souls to save , that we have endless Woes to avoid , and Everlasting Happiness to seek after . And , O God , with us , we beseech Thee likewise to bless all those that desire or stand in need of our Prayers ; and to communicate of thy Grace and Mercy according to their and our severall wants and necessities . Oh do Thou enlarge the Church and Kingdom of Christ , weaken and destroy the Power of Sin , and Antichrist ; be favourable in particular to these Nations wherein we live , vouchsafing to us those Mercies we stand in need of , and turning from us those Judgements which our sins may cry for . Bless our Magistrates and Ministers ; bless those that are near unto us by the bonds of Nature , with all such as suffer sickness or any other affliction or misery . Bless this Place , and grant that real Godliness , Saving Knowledge , Peace , and Truth , may flourish here more and more . Accept of Praise for all thy Mercies hitherto vouchsafed unto us . Continue , we pray Thee , thy mercifull Protection over us this night ; keep us from sin , and the dangers that a Night may bring forth , let us be refreshed and raised the next Day more able and willing to serve Thee in the Duties of it . These and all other needfull Mercies we humbly beg for the sake of Christ , continuing further to pray unto Thee as he himself hath taught us , saying , Our Father which art in Heaven , &c. Concerning the Lords-Day . LEt it always be remembred before it comes , to prepare for it ; and when it is come , to keep it Holy. It hath been honoured 1 by God the Father , forming thereupon the Elements of the World , 2 by God the Son , rising from the Dead , and appearing several times after his Resurrection , 3 by God the Holy Ghost descending with his miraculous Gifts and Graces upon the Apostles and Others , 4 by the Christian Church making it the time of her Solemn Assemblies . Let us not therefore profane any part of it , but be now as carefull for the Welfare of our Souls , as we are upon other days for our bodily Sustenance . Excepting such time as is for works of absolute Necessity , which cannot be done the Day before or the Day following ; let us with Chearfulness spend it wholly in hearing the Word of God read and taught ; in private Devotion and publick Prayers , which are both for the Morning and After-noon ; in acknowledgment of our offences to God , and amendment of the same ; in reconciling our selves charitably to our Neighbours where displeasure hath been ; in often Receiving the Communion of the Body and Blood of Christ ; in Visiting of the Poor and Sick , and using all good and sober Conversation . Thus we shall please the Will of God , and conscientiously obey our Civil and Ecclesiastical Governours , who strictly enjoyn the same by their Power derived from God. Thus we shall have a more deep and lasting sense of God and Religion imprest upon our Hearts , and so live more holily the Week following . Besides prudent and good Men have observed their outward worldly Affairs most prospered that Week , which they began with a diligent and religious Observation of the Lords-Day . But However that is , most certainly , if we duly sanctifie this Day of Rest here , we shall celebrate an Everlasting Rest and Sabbath hereafter . If now we sincerely and willingly joyn with the Congregations of Gods People , to worship him as we ought to do , we shall in due time joyn with the Blessed Company of Saints and Angels above to sing his Praises for evermore . Psal . 118. 24. This is the Day which the Lord hath made , we will rejoyce and be glad in it . V. 20. This is the Gate of the Lord , the Righteous shall enter into it . Psal . 122. 1. I was glad when they said unto me , Let us go into the House of the Lord. Revel . 1. 10 , I was in the Spirit on the Lords-Day . Acts 20. 7. And upon the First Day of the Week , when the Disciples came together to break Bread , Paul preached unto them . 1 Cor. 16. 2. Upon the First Day of the Week , let every one of you lay by him in Store as God hath prospered him . A Morning Prayer for the Lords-Day which may be used by more together , or by one alone for the reason mentioned page . 4 PRaised be thy holy Name , O God , for all thy favours and benefits bestowed upon us from time to time , concerning this , or a better Life . Blessed be thy Goodness for the Mercies of the last Night , and this Morning ; that thou hast brought us to the beginning of another Christian Sabbath . Oh let not our former unfruitfulness hinder thy present Blessing and Assistance in what we have to do ; but do thou we pray Thee in Christ Jesus pardon and mend us both at once . And help us now so to remember and esteem this thy Day , as to lay aside all secular businesses and diversions , and to apply our selves to all those private and publick Duties which concern the Sanctification thereof ; not doint after our own ways , nor finding our own Pleasures , nor speaking our own words ; but consecrating our own selves and services to thy more especial Worship ; spending the whole Day in works of Religion , Necessity and Mercy . Be graciously present with all those Assemblies of thy Saints which do on this Day meet together for thy Worship and Service . More especially be pleased to direct and assist the Minister to whose charge we belong ; that he may speak to the Consciences and Conditions of this People . And do thou remove from us all irreverence , distraction , dulness , prejudice , and unbelief in hearing of thy Word , that having the same accompanied by the Power of thy Spirit , it may be effectual for the further enlightning of our Minds , the quickening of our Affections , the bettering of our Hearts , and the amendment of our Lives . And let us think we have done nothing in Hearing , Reading , Praying , Receiving , Singing of Psalms , Confering , Meditating , till in all we have glorified Thee our Creator , Redeemer and Sanctifier , till our Souls be brought something nearer unto Heaven , unto thy Self ; And all we beg upon the account of Christ , saying further as he hath taught us , Our Father , &c. A Family Prayer for the Evening on the Lords-Day . OEternal God , and most Gracious Father , we thine unworthy servants do here cast down our selves at the Footstool of thy Grace , acknowledging that we were conceived in sin , and have actually in thought word and deed transgressed thy Holy and Righteous Precepts ; so that if thou shouldest look upon us as in our selves , we could not expect any thing but thy Wrath and our own Condemnation . But , O holy Father , for Jesus Christ thy dear Sons sake , for the Merits of his Obedience and Bloodshed , we beseech Thee to have Mercy upon us , pardoning to us all our sins , and freeing us from the Shame and Confusion which is due unto us for them . And we pray Thee inspire thy Holy Spirit into our Hearts , that by his Illumination and effectual Working , we may have the inward sight and feeling of our sins and natural corruptions , and not through Custom be blinded or hardened in them . That we may more and more loath them , and be heartily grieved for them , endeavouring by the use of all good means to overcome , and to get out of them . Oh let us feel the Power of Christs death killing sin in our mortal Bodies , and the vertue of his Resurrection raising up our Souls unto Newness of Life ; that living in thy Fear unto thy Glory , we may die in thy Favour , and in thine Appointed time , attain unto the Blessed Resurrection of the Just , unto Eternal Life . In the mean while , O Lord , increase our Faith in the sweet promises of the Gospel , and our Repentance from dead works ; the assurance of our hope ; and our love unto thy self , and thy children , especially those whom we shall see to stand in need of our help and comfort ; that so by the fruits of Piety and a Righteous Life , we may be assured that thy holy Spirit doth dwell in us , and that we are thy Children by Grace and Adoption . And grant us , Good Father , the continuance of Health , Peace , Maintenance , and all other outward things , so far forth , as thy Divine Wisdome shall think meet and necessary for us . And we beseech thee , O Lord , to be mercifull likewise to thy whole Church , and particularly to these Kingdoms wherein we live , vouchsafing to us those Mercies we stand in need of , and turning from us those Judgements which our sins may cry for . Preserve the Kings Majesty , bless all the Royal Family ; bless our Magistrates and Ministers , this place , those that are near unto us by Kindred or Neighbourhood ; be graciously present with all our Christian Brethren that suffer sickness or any other affliction or misery ; grant them patience to bear thy Cross , and Deliverance when , and which way it shall seem best unto Thee . And O Lord , let us not forget our last End , and those accounts which then we must render unto Thee . In Health and Prosperity make us mindfull of Sickness , and the evil Day that is behind ; that these things may not overtake us as a snare , but that we may in good measure , like wise Virgins , be found prepared for the Coming of Christ to call us by Death unto Judgement . And here , O Lord , we do from our very Souls , render unto Thee most humble and hearty thanks , for all thy Blessings bestowed upon us , concerning this Life and that which is to come . We praise Thee especially for Christ the Fountain and Foundation of all thy Mercies we ever yet received , or hope hereafter to receive from Thee . In him we praise Thee for the Mercies thou hast this day bestowed upon us , or given us occasion to remember , whether concerning the Creation of the World , or the Redemption of Mankind . We praise thee for thy holy Word and Sacraments , and seasons of Grace yet vouchsafed unto us . We praise Thee that by thy good Providence we have been preserved and provided for to this very moment ; intreating Thee likewise to continue thy Mercifull Protection over us this night . And , O Lord , we beseech Thee let those saving Truths which have been delivered unto us , sink down into our Hearts , and spring up in our Conversations . Let us keep up such holy Purposes and heavenly Affections as may have been wrought in any of us whilst attending upon Thee . Let our lives be in some measure answerable to the means we enjoy . Let the fruit of this Day appear in us the Week following , and all the days of our Lives following . Henceforth let our resolution of pleasing Thee , and doing good in our Generation be more confirmed ; let the felicities of Heaven be more esteemed ; let our desires of Earthly things be more abated ; let the Breathings of our Souls after a fuller enjoyment of thy Self be more enlarged ; Let our sins , those of our holy things , be pardodoned , our persons and performances accepted , and our Souls eternally saved ; And al upon the alone account of Jesus Christ , it whose prevailing Name we continue to pray unto Thee , saying , Our Father , &c. As for those who are furnished with Bibles and the Book of Common Prayer , I shall direct them if they desire it , how to use part of the Morning and Evening Service according to the Liturgy by themselves , or with their Families . But because many Pious Divines are of opinion that the Reverence due to the Book of Common Prayer , is best preserved by imploying it only in the Publick Divine Service ; or in Private where there is one in Holy Orders to officiate : And because we should always strive to be present at the Publick Service of the Church on any Holy Day , especially on the Lords-Day , and such Festivals as are in Remembrance of our Saviour Christ ; You have to the former here added one Prayer more which you may use on any such Festival in Remembrance of our Blessed Saviour , that is to say , On the Days of his Incarnation , Birth , Circumcision , Epiphanie , Presenting in the Temple , Passion , Resurrection , Ascension , and Mission of the Holy Ghost . A Prayer upon any of the foresaid Festivals in Remembrance of our Blessed Lord and Saviour . O Most glorious God , the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ , the Father of lights , from whom cometh every good and perfect Gift ; it is our bounden Duty and our great Priviledge , constantly to acknowledge Thee with joy and exaltation of Spirit , in remembrance of thy infinite Bounty to us , and to all the World. Every day tells us how good Thou art , and every one of thy Creatures calls upon us to magnifie , love , and serve Thee , who hast made so many of them to serve us . But this Day gives us occasion to remember thy more special and extraordinary kindness to us the Children of Men , which calls for our highest Praises to be joyned with those of the blessed Company above , who are never weary of giving Honour , Glory , Blessing , and Thanks to thee our mercifull God and Saviour . O how great was that Love which an Angel came to give notice of ! and which a multitude of an Heavenly Host celebrated with songs of Praise , when thou sentest thy dear Son in the likeness of sinfull Flesh , and in the form of a Servant , to minister to our necessities , to relieve our misery , and to be the Way to everlasting Life ! Oh the Riches of thy Grace , that after Mankind had forfeited all the rights of thy Creatures , and had contemned and despitefully used many of thy Messengers , Thou wouldest in such Mercy create us again unto good Works ; and for that end appear thy self most gloriously among us in the Person of Jesus Christ ! We thank thee , O Lord , that thou hast assumed our Nature unto such a nearness to Thee , as we are not able to understand . We thank Thee , for the glad tidings which Jesus hath brought us from Heaven , that thou wilt be reconciled unto us , and admit us again into thy Favour : and that he hath observed the whole Law , and fulfilled all Righteousness ; and shewn us in our Likeness , what thou wouldest have us to do , and to be . We thank Thee for the Redemption which he hath wrought for us by his Blood and meritorious Passion . We rejoyce in the Victory which he hath gotten over hell and the grave by his Resurrection from the dead ; and in his glorious Triumph , when he ascended up on High , and led Captivity captive ; And in his Royal Power wherewith He was invested , when He sat down on the Right hand of the Majesty on High ; And in those Gifts which he received for Men , even for the Rebellious also , that the Lord God might dwell among them . Blessed be thy Eternal Goodness which hath made him a most mercifull and compassionate High Priest , and given us so great assurance , that he is become the Author of Eternal Salvation to all them that obey him . Blessed be thy Goodness , which hath sent the Holy Ghost , and continued to us a succession of Pastours and Teachers , to be the Guides of our Souls , and to minister to us those pledges of thy Love which our Saviour left us , in the Communion of his Body and Blood. O God , that our hearts enflamed with ardent love to Thee , who hast loved us in such a wonderfull manner , could ascend up to Heaven in these devout Meditations , and not come down again but with desires left in them still aspiring thitherwards ! Oh touch our Souls so powerfully with a sense of these things , that with an hearty zealous Affection they may ever look towards Thee , and our dear Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ . Oh fix our eyes on him , as he was here on earth , that we may learn of Him , his humble and meek obedience to thy Commands ; and as he is now in Heaven , that we may trust Him for the performance of his precious Promises , and patiently wait till he carry us also to that glorious Place . Since he appeared among us to destroy the works of the devil , and died to redeem us from all sin , and rose again that he might bless us in turning every one of us from our iniquities , and is made Lord of all , that he may govern us by his Laws , and reward or punish us according to our works ; Preserve in our minds , we beseech Thee , a constant and lively sense of this great End of his whole Undertaking for us ; that he may see the fruit of the Travell of his Soul in us , and our whole life may be a serious study and endeavour to imitate Him , by purifying our selves as he is pure . Oh that thy Fear and Love may keep us from abusing any of the good things which thou hast allowed us for our bodily Refreshment ; grant that we may receive them thankfully as from thy Hand , and enjoy them moderately as in thy Presence , with bowels of Mercy to those who are in need , with a tast of better spiritual Delights , and Heavenly Joyes , and with hunger and thirst after the Fulness and Perfection of those Joyes , when our Lord Jesus shall come to shew us his Glory , and entertain us with eternal Satisfaction in his incomprehensible Love. Amen . Here you may add the Collect for the Morning or Evening respectively set down page 6. Concluding always with the Lords Prayer . The following Prayer for the Sacrament may be used by one alone after a Private Prayer ; or by more after a Family-Prayer ; at convenient times before Receiving . ANd as for those of us in this ( Place ) or ( Family ) who intend to receive the Sacrament of Christs Body and Blood , pardon , Lord , we pray Thee our former not hungering and thirsting after it , our not Preparing for it , not Partaking of it so often as our necessities and opportunities have required . Enable us now , we earnestly beseech Thee , being duly prepared , to come as worthy and welcome Guests unto thy Table . Give us a Lively sight and sense of our sins and imperfections , of our wants and weaknesses , that we may hunger and thirst after Christ and his Righteousness , expecting from his Fulness to be supplied in whatsoever our Souls may stand in need of . Let us be enabled rightly to discern the Lords Body , and feelingly to understand the relation between the Signs , and things signified , applying both unto our selves in their proper use . To this end , Enlighten our Minds more and more with the Knowledge of Jesus Christ , and of his Gospel ; especially of the great work of our Redemption by his Blood , and his unspeakable Love shining forth therein ; as also of the Covenant of Grace , and Seals annexed thereunto . Work in us an unfeigned Repentance , bewailing our sins past , and resolving to leave them for the time to come , and to serve thee in Righteousness and Holiness all the days of our Life . Endue us also with a true and lively Faith , that we may not only receive the outward Elements of Bread and Wine ; but inwardly partake of the Spiritual Blessings and benefits of our Saviours Death ; that so we may be assured of the forgiveness of all our forepast sins , and be better enabled to withstand Temptations for the time to come , that thereby our Souls may be enriched with all saving Graces , strengthened unto all good Duties , and nourished unto Everlasting Life . Inflame our hearts with most fervent Love towards Thee , and our Neighbours ; yea , even our Enemies , for thy sake ; and link our hearts together in an Holy Communion , as it becometh the true Members of Jesus Christ . And being thus in some measure prepared , let us yet look up to Thee , to pardon our Unpreparedness ; Let us still continue our dependance upon Christ for his Assistance , as knowing that we are not sufficient of our selves , so much as to think any thing , but our Sufficiency is of God. And when we come to thy Table , let us not coldly and formally perform this high and holy Service ; but with the exercise of Faith , Love , Repentance , Reverence , with the renewal of our Purposes of better Obedience , with inward Fervency and Devotion , in some such manner as may be pleasing unto Thee , honourable unto Christ , and comfortable to our selves . Let us so shew forth the precious Death of our dearest Redeemer , that in remembring the same , we may be unfeignedly thankfull , and sincerely praise Thee the blessed Trinity in Unity , unto whom be ascribed and given all Honour and Obedience now and for ever . Amen . Another Prayer which may be used in secret some time before the Sacrament . O Eternal and blessed God , I prostrate my self with humble Reverence before Thee the Searcher of hearts , not to excuse but aggravate my faults ; for I confess I have not given Thee that Honour , Worship , and Service which I owe to my Almighty Creator . Nor laid to heart , as I ought , thine infinite Love in Christ my Redeemer : Nor duly followed the godly Motions of thy Holy Spirit , which thou hast sent to renew and sanctifie my Affections , and draw me to thine Obedience . I have not lived up to the Faith which I profess , but behaved my self too often as if I neither dreaded the threatned Punishments , nor duly valued the promised glorious rewards of my Lord Christ , who will judge the World in Righteousness , and render to every one according to their Works . O Lord , I have done so much Evil , and so little Good ; been so eager in the pursuit of the things of this World , and so cold and unconcerned many times about those of Eternity ; so unmindfull of my promises , unthankfull for thy Benefits , and unfruitfull in the Knowledge of Christ , that it is a wonder of thy Patience and Goodness , that I am still alive , and not cut down like a barren Tree that cumbers the ground ; that I am not lamenting these follies in weeping and gnashing of teeth , which I now mention with so little sorrow and bitterness of Spirit . For ever adored be thy forbearing Mercy , which hath so long spared me an unprofitable servant , who have so many ways in thought , word , and deed , offended thy Divine Majesty . * Oh continue I beseech thee to be gracious unto me , and for Jesus his sake give me a truly penitent and believing Heart ; and by the vertue of that Sacrifice of himself , which he offered once for the sins of the World , let all my sins be done away and remembred no more . And for this and all other thy great Mercies , I resolve to offer unto Thee by Christ , the Sacrifice of continual Praise and Thanksgiving , and I present my body a living Sacrifice , holy , acceptable unto Thee , which is my reasonable Service ; And I dedicate my self absolutely to thy Obedience ; Oh therefore give me Grace ever to fear Thee , and to walk humbly with Thee , and to preserve a tender sense of my Duty towards Thee . O Lord , I purpose by thy Assistance , that hereafter I will never willingly depart from thy Precepts ; oh do thou strengthen me to perform what I have purposed ; that I may never be so unreasonable as to return to those sins which are the burden of my Heart ; and grieve thy Holy Spirit ; which rent the Flesh , and shed the Blood of the Lord Jesus ; and which I have so often , and so solemnly protested against . And now that I am going to thy Holy Table to commemorate the Sacrifice of my Saviour , to remember his love in Dying for me ; to give thee further testimonies of my love to Thee ; and receive new tokens of thy Love to me : O Lord , vouchsafe to make thy self powerfully present to my Mind . Represent thy self , and thy Son Jesus so lively to my thoughts in all Wisdom , Power , Goodness , Holiness , and Truth ; that I may never forget Thee any more ; but more seriously reverence thee , and love thee , and rejoyce in thee , and trust thee , and obey thee , all the days of my life . Imprint the very image of thy Son upon me ; that I may carry him ever in my Heart , and have his life and death continually before mine Eyes ; and in all things conform my self to his Will , and fashion my self after his Holy Example . Come , Lord Jesus , and possess thy self of my whole Man. Purifie me from all remaining filthiness either of the Flesh or Spirit . Bring in all thy Heavenly Graces along with thee into my Soul. And be my perpetual Defence , by giving me a fuller communication of thy Holy Spirit , and more mighty aides to do my duty towards Thee , and towards all Men. And for that end , compose my unsetled thoughts before I approach to receive the holy Mysteries ; that I may attend Thee with a full and clear conception of their meaning ; with an actual Belief of thy whole Gospel ; with most sensible love to thee , and desire to be more like thee ; with thy high Praises in my mouth , and joy unspeakable in my heart . May I presume most gracious Father , to ask such tasts and relishes of thy wondrous Love in Christ Jesus , that I may never be able to delight in any thing so much , as in the remembrance of it . But mine eyes may be ever towards the Lord ; and I may hunger and thirst perpetually after thy Righteousness , 'till I am rendred meet to be translated to that High and Holy place , where I shall see Thee , not as now in mysterious Representations ; but openly and as it were Face to Face . Amen . Lord Jesus ; who art able to save to the uttermost all them that come to God by Thee ; In thy most blessed name and words I continue my humble Prayers , Our Father , &c. I would intreat those who have never yet received , or but seldom , to read at their leasure , and with good Deliberation , the Doctrine of the Sacrament in the Church Catechism : as also the whole Order of the Administration thereof set down in the Book of Common Prayer ; by which , together with what is contained in the two foregoing Prayers , may be learnt , in good measure , what is needfull both in our Preparing for , and Partaking of that Holy Ordinance . And yet to further your more profitable and comfortable Receivimg , you may use these following Helps . Some brief helps to Meditation in Receiving the Sacrament of the Lords-Supper . FIrst , When the Sermon is ended , and thou art adressing thy self to the Banquet of the Lords Supper , meditate how lovingly thou art invited to be a guest at this Holy Table . Hoe , every one that thirsteth , come ye to the Waters ; Come , buy Wine and Milk without money , and without price : Eat ye that which is Good , and let your Soul delight it self in Fatness . Take , Eat , this is my Body which is broken for you ; Drink ye all of this ; for this is my Blood which was shed for the Remission of Sins . Secondly , As Abraham when he went up to the Mount to sacrifice Isaac his Son , left his servants beneath in the Valley : So when thou comest to the spiritual commemorative Sacrifice of the Lords-Supper , lay aside all earthly thoughts and cogitations , that thou mayest wholly contemplate of Christ , and offer up thy Soul to him , who Sacrificed both his Soul and Body for thee . Thirdly , Set thy self as in the Presence of God , with awfull and reverent thoughts of thy crucified Lord. If the blessed Apostle S. Peter , seeing but a glimpse of Christs Almighty Power , thought himself unworthy to stand in the same Boat with him ? how unworthy art thou to sit with Christ at the same Table , where thou mayest behold so much of his infinite Grace and Mercy displayed ? Yet if thou comest humbly , in Faith , Repentance and Charity , abhorring thy sins past , and purposing unfeignedly to amend thy life henceforth , let not thy former sins affright thee , for they shall never be laid to thy Charge ; and this Sacrament shall seal to thy Soul , that all thy sins are fully pardoned , and clean washed away by the Blood of Christ . For this Sacrament was not ordained for them who are perfect ; but to help penitent sinners towards Perfection . Christ came not to call the Righteous but Sinners to Repentance . And he saith , That the whole need not the Physician , but they that are sick . Bathe thou therefore thy Soul in this fountain of Christs Blood ; and doubtless , according to the Promise , Zech. 13. 1. Thou shalt be healed of all thy sins and uncleannesses . Not sinners , but they who are unwilling to repent of their sins , are debarred this Holy Ordinance . Fourthly , When the Minister begins to read the sentences of Scripture before the Offertory , let them be considered by thee to stirr up thy Charity to the Poor . Let Gods bounty to thee in Spirituals , provoke thy Mercy to others in Temporals . Hoping to be refreshed with the saving benefits of Christs Death ; be willing to thy Power to refresh the bowels of his poor Members : What we do to them , we do to Christ ; and who would not thus relieve Christ , who made himself Poor to make us Rich in the best things ? And now the Sacrament being begun to be administred , apply thy self with diligent Attention , and fervent Devotion to go along with the Minister in all Actions , Rites , Prayers , Confessions , Readings , Exhortations , or Thanksgivings , which are used in , and about the Holy Sacrament . When therefore thou seest the Minister putting apart Bread and Wine on the Lords Table , and consecrating them by Prayers , and rehearsal of the words of Christs Institution , to be an holy Sacrament of the blessed Body and Blood of Christ ; then meditate , how God the Father , of his meer love to Mankind , did set apart and seal his only begotten Son , to be the All-sufficient means , and only Mediator to redeem us from sin , and to reconcile us to Himself , and to bring us to Glory . When thou seest him break the Bread ; meditate how Jesus Christ was put to death as to his humane Nature ; and his blessed Body wounded and pierced , and both Soul and Body , as we may say , broken asunder for our sins ; and withall , call to mind the hainousness of them , and the greatness of Gods hatred against them , seeing his Justice could not be satisfied but by such a Sacrifice . When he is drawing towards Thee with the consecrated Bread , and offering it unto thee , then meditate , that Christ himself cometh unto thee , and both offereth , and giveth indeed unto thy Faith , Himself , and all the merits of his Death and Passion , to feed thy Soul unto Eternal life . The bread of the Lord is given by the Minister ; but the Bread which is the Lord is given by Christ himself . Ejaculations and Meditations which we may use while the Minister is giving the Bread and Wine to others . 1. O Holy Jesus , I behold thee stretched upon the Cross , with thy arms spread , ready to embrace and receive all Mankind into thy Bosom . 2. I see the Symbols , the Holy Bread , and the blessed Cup , but I also think of thy Authority ordaining these Rites ; of thy voice blessing these Symbols , of thy Mercy reaching out my pardon , thy Holy Spirit sanctifying my Spirit , thy blessed Self making intercession for me at the eternall Altar in Heaven . 3. Thy infinite Arms of Mercy are reached unto us , and our Arm of Faith reacheth unto thee : blessed be Jesus who will be joyned unto Servants . 4. I am helped by these outward signs , blessed Saviour , to remember thy Body and thy Blood ; but by these I do not feel thy Wounds . My Lord had the smart , but we the ease ; his were the Sufferings , but ours the Mercy ; and after he had paid the Price , we got the Purchase . Oh that my heart therefore by love and desire might reach out after him , and by joy and delight ever rest in Him ! 5. I desire to know nothing , but Jesus and him crucified . O let the power of thy Cross prevail against all the powers of Darkness . Let the Peace of thy Cross give me Peace with God , and in my own Conscience : Let the Victory of thy Cross mortifie all my evil and corrupt affections . Let the Triumph of thy Cross lead me on to a state of Holiness . And let the Wisdom of thy Cross make me wise unto Salvation . 6. Thou wilt not dwell in a polluted House ; make my Soul clean , and do thou consecrate it into a Temple , O theu great Bishop of our Souls , by the indwelling of thy holy Spirit : and let the Members of Christ never become the instruments of Unrighteousness . 7. O God my God , assist me now and ever greatly , and graciously : Grant that I may not receive Bread onely , nor Wine onely , for man cannot live by that ; but that I may eat Christ , not by Papal Transubstantiation , but by Sacramental Participation . 8. I am nothing , I have nothing , I desire nothing , but Jesus my Saviour ; make haste , O Lord , behold my heart is ready , thou hast opened my heart to receive Thee into the seat of Love ; Come Lord Jesus , come quickly . As thou eatest the Bread , thankfully praise God for the saving benefits of Christs Death . And further think with thy self , As verily as I now cat this Bread , so verily was Christs Body broken for the sins of the World ; and if I sincerely believe in Him , as I now desire to do ( unfeignedly devoting my self unto him , relying upon Gods Mercy in and through him , being willing to be guided by his Word , and sanctified by his Spirit ) so verily are my sins pardoned for the merits of his precious Death . Here before the Cup be brought to thee thou mayest use one or more of the foregoing Ejaculations . Thou mayest also have time to bless God for the Death of Christ ; to meditate upon his Sufferings ; to admire the greatness of his Love in dying for thee , resolving to take the Cup of Salvation , and to pledge his love with love ; to renew thy Covenants with God , to reinforce thy purposes of better Obedience ; to beg of God strength to performe such Duties as thou hast formerly neglected , against such sins and temptations as have too easily prevailed against thee ; to pray also for all Patience under such troubles and afflictions as may befall thee before another Sacrament Day come about . Having received the Cup at the Ministers hand , in the instant of Drinking , and as soon after it as may be , meditate on Christs Hanging and Bleeding upon the Cross ; giving him hearly thanks for his love in Dying for us . And having poured the Sacramental Wine into thy stomach , say with thy self , As verily as I have received this Wine , so certainly Christs Blood was shed for the sins of the World ; and if I sincerely believe in him , as I now desire to do , ( unfeignedly devoting my self unto Him , relying upon Gods Mercies and his Merits , and being willing to be guided by his Laws and sanctified by his Spirit ; and resolving to continue in his Love and Service to the end ) so certainly are my sins forgiven , by the vertue of his Obedience and Bloodshed . And now having received the Sacrament of Christs blessed Body and Blood , out of a conscientious respect to his Command , with a desire thankfully to remember his precious Death : consider , that he who hath given thee his Son , will with him give thee all things else ; so far as will be for thy true Good. Therefore now , thou mayest here further represent unto God through Christ , all thy needs , and the needs of thy Relations , signifie to him the condition of thy Soul ; complain of thy infirmities ; Pray for help against the enemies of thy Salvation , tell him of thy griefs , represent thy fears , thy hopes , and thy Desires ; look up to God to make the Blood of Christ unto thee , a quickening , comforting , strengthening , justifying , sanctifying Blood. And as thou feelest the Sacramental Wine which thou hast drunk , warming thy cold stomach ; so endeavour to feel the Holy Ghost cherishing thy Soul with the joyfull assurance of thy being reconciled to God , and accepted unto eternal Life . Furthermore , because it is said 1 Cor. 16. 17. The Cup of Blessing which we bless , is it not the Communion of the Blood of Christ ? the Bread which we break , is it not the Communion of the Body of Christ ? For we being many , are one Bread , and one Body ; for we are all partakers of that one Bread. It must be remembred by thee , that though all the faithfull are many ; yet they are all but one Mystical Body , whereof Christ is Head. And therefore thou must love every Christian , especially those Receiving with thee , as thy self , and a member of that Body . When the Minister hath given the Bread and Wine to all the Communicants be ready to joyn with him again in the remaining Prayers and Praises . And after you have given Thanks , and finished your private , and publick Devotions ; go home , but do not presently forget what you have been doing in this solemn Ordinance . They that as soon as the Office is performed , part with Christ , and carry their mind away presently to worldly Interests , or to sensual Merriments , these may be suspected to be too indifferent as to the things of God. They have ( as one says ) brought their Lord into the house , and themselves slip out at the back-door . Otherwise doth the Spouse entertain her beloved Lord. Cant. 3. 4. I found him whom my soul loveth , I held him , and would not let him go . Spend therefore the remaining part of the Day , partly in the entertainment of thy Lord , with acts of love and delight , with thanks and praise unto Him for his Favours ; partly in after-examination , in reflecting upon thy Behaviour when thou wert before the Lord ; and partly in strengthening of thy purposes , and confirming thy Resolutions of better Obedience , that so there may be some fruit seen of this day , in many other days that follow , till the Solemnity shall return again . Remember thy promises renewed unto God , bind thee to watch against sin , and unto Holiness all thy life , as much as upon the Sacrament Day . Moses coming from the Mount where he had been conversing with God , his face did shine , Exod. 34. 30. When thou goest from the Table where thou hast had sweet Communion with thy God , the face of thy conversation must shine so with holiness , that others may take notice of it . It is said of the High Priest and Elders , that observing the language and carriage of the Apostles Peter and John , they marvelled , and took knowledge of them that they had been with Jesus , Acts 4. 13. So thy words should be so gracious , and thy works so exemplary after a Sacrament , that all those who behold thee , may take knowledge , that thou hast been with Jesus ; that at his Table thou didst sup with Christ , and Christ with thee . A Prayer after the Sacrament . BLess the Lord , O my Soul ; and all that is within me , bless his Holy Name . Bless the Lord , O my Soul : and forget not all his Benefits . Who forgiveth all thine iniquities , and satisfieth thy Soul with good things . Who redeemeth thy life from Destruction ; who crowneth thee with loving Kindness and tender Mercies . O mercifull Lord , I humbly thank thee for Christ the Fountain and Foundation of all thy Mercies vouchsafed unto me from day to day . O gracious Redeemer I yield thee all possible Thanks , that thou hast this day refreshed my Soul with the Sacrament of thy precious Body and Blood. Seeing O God , that thou hast so loved me as to give thy Son , and that thou , O Saviour , hast so loved me , as to give thy self to die for me ; help me , I pray thee to pledge thy Love with love , henceforth hating and forbearing what thou forbiddest , loving and practising what thou commandest . Oh that my prevailing love to Thee may quench and kill in me all inordinate love of the World and the Vanities thereof . Oh that walking in the strength of that Heavenly Food which I have now received , I may overcome the difficulties of this Life , and perform better the Duties of my Place and Calling , and withstand more constantly the temptations which I am most liable unto . O God , seeing thou hast not withholden thy only Son , how shalt thou not with him , as I humbly desire , freely give all needfull Blessings to me , and all that I am especially bound to pray for . * And whereas I have this day renewed my Covenant with thee , and my purposes of better Obedience ; strengthen me , I beseech thee , that I may pay the Vows which I have made , and do as I have purposed . Oh that whatever is in me vicious , and contrary to thy Holy Will , may by vertue of this Sacrament be rooted out of me , so that my Heart may become thereby a fit habitation for thy Spirit . Let it be to me a seal of the Pardon of my sins , the confirmation of my Faith , the provision of my Pilgrimage , and the joy of my Soul , let it be my peace and support in the time of Affliction , and my comfort and strength in the day of my Dissolution . Let me hereafter walk more evenly and closely with Thee , in the performance of my Duty , with a contented Mind , whatever trials or troubles befal me before another Sacrament come about . Grant that I may still hunger and thirst after this Bread of Life and Cup of Salvation , and that I may with a pure mind and chaste affection receive it often , so as to grow in Grace and Godliness , and be preserved in Body and Soul to everlasting Life through Jesus Christ , in whose name and words I further continue to pray unto thee . Our Father , &c. An Expedient to further Peoples often and orderly receiving the Holy Communion in the Parish of Cartmel . IN the Order for the Administration of the Holy Communion , we have , among others , this Rule both pious and reasonable , viz. That every Parishioner ( that is , all above sixteen years old ) shall communicate , or receive the Sacrament at least three times in the Year , of which Easter is to be one ; for the better observation whereof , let it be remembred . 1. That by Gods assistance , if no great inconvenience hinder it , there will be a Sacrament at the Church upon the first Lords Days of ( December , April , August , ) especially for the Inhabitants of Stavely Division , or the West of Broughton , and part of Allithwait , that is , the Inhabitants of Stavely , Farigge , Hasslerigge , Field-End , Over-Carke , Wood-Broughton , Ainsome , and part of the Church-Town to Headless-Cross , or of any other place in that part of the Parish . And that the Sunday before each of these three Sacrament-Days , there will be a Sermon at Stavely Chappel in the After noon . 2. That there will likewise be a Sacrament upon the first Lords Days of ( January , May , September ) especially for the Inhabitants of Cartmelfell , or the East of Broughton Division , that is to say , the Inhabitants of Cartmel-fell , Ayside , the Greaves , Barbar-Green , Field-Broughton , Hampsfield , and the Grange , or of any other place in that part of the Parish . And that the Sunday before each of these three Sacrament Days , there will be a Sermon at Cartmelfell-Chappel in the After noon . 3. That there will be a Sacrament on the three first Lords-Days of ( February , June , October ) especially for the Inhabitants of Allithwait Division , that is to say , the Inhabitants of Birkby , Allithwait , Templand , Kentsbank , Kirket End , Lindal , and both the Newtons , or of any other place in that part of the Parish . And that the Sunday before each of these three Sacrament Days , there will be a Sermon at Lindal-Chappel in the After-noon . 4. That there will be a Sacrament on the first Lords Days of ( November , March , July , ) especially for the Inhabitants of Holker or Walton Division , that is to say , the Inhabitants of Browedge , Backbarrow , Speel-bank , Origge , Beckside , Burnses , Walton , Part of the Church-Town , Holker , Carke , Flookborough , or any other place in that Division . And that the Sunday before each of these three Sacrament Days , there will be a Sermon at Flookborough-Chappel in the After-noon . Concerning Catechising . That we may believe and live as we ought to do , and that the Lords Table may be furnished with more knowing and worthy Communicants ; Parents , Family-governours , and Teachers of publick or private Schools are intreated , as the Laws of God and the Constitutions of the Church require , to be carefull to instruct those under their Tuition and Charge ; and particularly in the Church Catechism , that they may be able to give an account of the same when thereunto called . The Church Catechism . Question . WHat is your Name ? Answer . N. or M. Quest . Who gave you this Name ? Ans . My Godfathers and Godmothers in my Baptism , wherein I was made a Member of Christ , the Child of God , and an Inheritour of the Kingdom of Heaven . Quest . What did your Godfathers and Godmothers then for you ? Ans . They did promise and vow three things in my name . First , that I should renounce the devil and all his works , the pomps and vanity of this wicked World , and all the sinfull lusts of the Flesh . Secondly , that I should believe all the articles of the Christian Faith. And thirdly , that I should keep Gods holy Will and Commandments , and walk in the same all the days of my life . Quest . Dost thou not think that thou art bound to believe , and to do , as they have promised for thee ? Ans . Yes verily ; and by Gods help so I will : And I heartily thank our heavenly Father , that he hath called me to this State of Salvation , through Jesus Christ our Saviour . And I pray unto God to give me his Grace , that I may continue in the same unto my lives end . Cat. Rehearse the Articles of thy Belief . Ans . I believe in God the Father Almighty , maker of Heaven and Earth ; And in Jesus Christ his onely Son our Lord , who was conceived by the Holy Ghost , born of the Virgin Mary , suffered under Pontius Pilate , was crucified , dead and buried , He descended into hell , the third day he rose again from the Dead . He ascended into Heaven , And sitteth at the right hand of God the Father Almighty : From thence he shall come to judge the quick and the dead . I believe in the Holy Ghost , the Holy Catholick Church , the Communion of Saints , the Forgiveness of sins , the Resurrection of the Body , and the Life Everlasting . Amen . Quest . What dost thou chiefly learn in these Articles of thy Belief ? Ans . First , I learn to believe in God the Father , who hath made me , and all the world . Secondly , in God the Son , who hath redeemed me , and all Mankind . Thirdly , in God the Holy Ghost , who sanctifieth me , and all the elect People of God. Quest . You said that your Godfathers and Godmothers did promise for you , that you should keep Gods Commandments . Tell me now how many there be ? Ans . Ten. Quest . Which be they ? Ans . The same which God spake in the twentieth Chapter of Exodus , saying , I am the Lord thy God , who brought thee out of the land of Egypt , out of the house of bondage . I. Thou shalt have none other gods , but Me. II. Thou shalt not make to thy self any graven image , nor the likeness of any thing that is in Heaven above , or in the Earth beneath , or in the Water under the Earth . Thou shalt not bow down to them nor worship them . For I the Lord thy God am a jealous God , and visit the sins of the Fathers upon the Children , unto the third and fourth Generation of them that hate me , and shew mercy unto thousands in them that love me and keep my Commandments . III. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain , for the Lord will not hold him guiltless that taketh his Name in vain . IV. Remember that thou keep holy the Sabbath day . Six days shalt thou labour , and do all that thou hast to do : but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord thy God. In it thou shalt do no manner of Work , thou , and thy son , and thy daughter , thy man-servant , and thy maid-servant , thy cattel , and the stranger that is within thy gates . For in six days the Lord made Heaven and Earth , the Sea , and all that in them is , and rested the seventh day : wherefore the Lord blessed the seventh day and hallowed it . V. Honour thy Father and thy Mother , that thy Days may be long in the Land which the Lord thy God giveth thee . VI. Thou shalt do no murder . VII . Thou shalt not commit adultery . VIII . Thou shalt not steal . IX . Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy Neighbour . X. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbours House , thou shalt not covet thy neighbours Wife , nor his Servant , nor his Maid , nor his Ox , nor his Ass , nor any thing that is his . Quest . What dost thou chiefly learn by these Commandments ? Ans . I learn two things ; my duty towards God , and my duty towards my Neighbour . Quest . What is thy duty towards God ? Ans . My duty towards God , is to believe in him , to fear him , and love him with all my Heart , with all my Mind , with all my Soul , and with all my strength ; to worship him , to give him thanks , to put my whole trust in him , to call upon him , to honour his holy Name and his Word ; and to serve him truly all the days of my life . Quest . What is thy duty towards thy Neighbour ? Ans . My duty towards my Neighbour , is to love him as my self , and to do to all Men as I would they should do to me . To love , honour , and succour my Father and Mother . To honour and obey the King and all that are put in Authority under him . To submit my self to all my Governours , Teachers , Spiritual Pastours and Masters . To order my self lowly and reverently to all my Betters . To hurt no body by word , or deed . To be true and just in all my Dealings . To bear no malice nor hatred in my Heart . To keep my hands from picking and stealing , and my tongue from evil speaking , lying and slandering . To keep my body in temperance , soberness , and chastity . Not to covet nor desire other mens goods ; but to learn and labour truly to get mine own living , and to do my duty in that state of life , unto which it shall please God to call me . Cat. My good Child , know this , that thou art not able to do these things of thy self , nor to walk in the Commandments of God , and to serve him , without his special Grace , which thou must learn at all times to call for by diligent Prayer . Let me hear therefore if thou canst say the Lords Prayer . Ans . Our Father which art in Heaven , Hallowed be thy Name . Thy Kingdome come . Thy will be done in Earth , as it is in Heaven . Give us this day our daily Bread. And forgive us our trespasses , as we forgive them that trespass against us . And lead us not into temptation : but deliver us from evil . Amen . Quest . What desirest thou of God in this Prayer ? Ans . I desire my Lord God our heavenly Father , who is the giver of all goodness , to send his Grace unto me , and to all People , that we may worship him , serve him , and obey him as we ought to do . And I pray unto God , that he will send us all things that be needfull both for our Souls and Bodies ; and that he will be mercifull unto us , and forgive us our sins ; and that it will please him to save and defend us in all dangers ghostly and bodily ; and that he will keep us from all sin and wickedness , and from our ghostly enemy , and from everlasting death . And this I trust he will do of his mercy and goodness , through our Lord Jesus Christ . And therefore I say , Amen . So be it . Quest . How many Sacraments hath Christ ordained in his Church ? Ans . Two only , as generally necessary to Salvation , that is to say , Baptism , and the Supper of the Lord. Quest . What meanest thou by this word Sacrament ? Ans . I mean an outward visible Sign of an inward and spiritual Grace , given unto us , ordained by Christ himself , as a means whereby we receive the same , and a pledge to assure us thereof . Quest . How many parts are there in a Sacrament ? Ans . Two : the outward visible Sign , and the inward spiritual Grace . Quest . What is the outward visible sign , or form in Baptism ? Ans . Water : wherein the person is baptized , In the Name of the Father , and of the Son , and of the Holy Ghost . Quest . What is the inward and spiritual Grace ? Ans . A death unto sin , and a new birth unto Righteousness : for being by nature born in sin , and the children of wrath , we are hereby made the children of Grace . Quest . What is required of persons to be baptized ? Ans . Repentance , whereby they forsake sin ; and Faith , whereby they stedfastly believe the promises of God , made to them in that Sacrament . Quest . Why then are Infants baptized , when by reason of their tender age they cannot perform them ? Ans . Because they promise them both by their sureties : which promise , when they come to age , themselves are bound to perform . Quest . Why was the Sacrament of the Lords-Supper ordained ? Ans . For the continual remembrance of the sacrifice of the death of Christ , and of the benefits which we receive thereby . Quest . What is the outward part or sign of the Lords-Supper ? Ans . Bread and Wine , which the Lord hath commanded to be received . Quest . What is the inward part , or thing signified ? Ans . The Body and Blood of Christ , which are indeed taken and received by the faithfull in the Lords Supper . Quest . What are the benefits whereof we are partakers thereby ? Ans . The strengthning and refreshing of our Souls by the Body and Blood of Christ , as our bodies are by the Bread and Wine . Quest . What is required of them who come to the Lords Supper ? Ans . To examine themselves , whether they repent them truly of their former sins , stedfastly purposing to lead a new life ; have a lively faith in Gods mercy through Christ , with a thankfull remembrance of his death ; and be in charity with all men . When the Sacrament comes every fourth moneth to be administred for any of the Divisions above mentioned * , the respective Church and Chappel-Wardens thereof are desired to give timely notice unto a fitting number of Servants and Children within the same , to be catechised on the Sacrament Day for the said Division , or on some other day of that Moneth . Thus the care of this needfull exercise will be more equally shared among them , and the duty it self more constantly performed . And the better to observe an Order in thus calling the Youth to Catechizing in the said Divisions , it may be convenient to begin in the Higher End of each of them , and so to go by House-rows as much as may be through the whole , taking a convenient number of Families at a time . Concerning Personal Instruction . THe like course , so far as it shall be found convenient , may be used concerning Personal Instruction , whereby , as the younger sort in several Families , come to the Church to be catechized ; so the elder People in the same , or the like number of Families , may come to the Ministers house , or he go to theirs , to discourse with him in a plain familiar way , of the most necessary Gospel Truths , and Christian duties , which most nearly concern Gods honour and worship and our eternal Salvation . To this purpose we may improve the Church Catechism , or the following Profession of Faith , and Catechism consisting but of 12 Questions and Answers ; endeavouring fully to understand , and to practice the things therein cantained , though the very words be not by each one so fully remembred . Inhabitants that are most knowing , grave and vertuous , should be forward thus to entertain holy Christian Conference with their Ministers about such weighty and excellent things , because in this respect by their godly Examples they may do very much good in drawing on others who need it . For by this means , Truth may often be defended , errour avoided , sin and wickedness hindred , Piety and Goodness promoted and encouraged ; Thus peoples mistakes may be rectified , their doubts removed , and that hurtfull strangeness that is too often between them and their Ministers taken away . Moreover , thus the weak and ignorant may be better informed , the careless and secure awakened and converted , the wavering confirmed and settled , and the publick Ministry of the Word and Sacraments , made more effectual and profitable . In short , by this means none shall be hurt or shamed , but all that are willing to it , and sincere in it , shall ( God assisting ) be bettered , credited , comforted , edified , and greatly furthered by a consciencious improving their present opportunites , and the precious time of this life , in order to an happy Eternity . Bishop Taylor in a Preface of his to his Treatise of Repentance . I hope ( says he of himself ) I have received many of the Mercies of a repenting Sinner , and have felt the turnings and varieties of Spiritual Intercourses , and have been taught something of the Secret of Souls . And I have ( says he ) often observed the advantages in Ministring to others , and am confident that the greatest benefits of our Office may with best effect be communicated to Souls in personal and particular Ministrations . M r Thorndyke speaking of some Persons neglecting formerly to Administer the Sacrament , The way ( says he ) to have reformed us , should not have been to leave off Communions , but to make them more frequent , and to endeavour that there might be more Personal Instruction , by which People might be better fitted for frequent Communion . D r H. Hammond of the Power of the Keys Cap. 4. Sect. 104. There will ( says he ) be little matter of doubt or controversie , but that private , frequent , spiritual Conference betwixt fellow Christians , but espicially ( and in matters of high concernment and difficulty ) between the Presbyter and those of his Charge , even in the time of Health ; and peculiarly that part of it , which is spent in the discussion of every mans special sin , and infirmities , and inclinations , may prove very usefull and advantageous ( in order to special Directions , Reproof , and Comfort ) to the making the Man of God perfect . And to tell Truth , if the pride and self-conceit of some , the wretchlesness of others , the bashfulness of a third sort , the nauseating and instant satiety of any good in the fourth , the follies of Men , and artifices of Satan had not put this Practice out of fashion among us , there is no doubt but more good might be done by Ministers this way , then is now done by any other means separated from the use of this ; particularly , then by that of Publick Preaching ( which yet need not be neglected the more when this is used ) which hath now the fate to be cried up , and almost solely depended on ; it being the likelier way , as Quintilian saith , ( comparing publick and private Teaching of Youth ) to fill narrow mouth'd Bottles ( and such are the most of us ) by taking them single in the hand , and pouring water into each , then by setting them altogether , and throwing never so many bottles of water on them . M r Baxter in one of his Prefaces to his Reformed Pastor : My advice to you is this . See that you obey your faithfull Teachers , and improve their help for your Salvation while you have it ; and take heed that you refuse not to learn when they would teach you . And in particular , see that you refuse not to submit to them in this Duty of private Instruction . Go to them when they desire you , and be thankfull for their help . Yea , at other times when you need their Advice , go to them of your own accord , and ask it . Their Office is to be your Guides in the way of Life . If you seek not their direction , it seems you either despise Salvation it self , or else you are so proud as to think your selves sufficient to be your own Directors . Shall God in Mercy send you Leaders to teach and conduct you in the way to Glory , and will you stoutly send them back , or refuse their Assistance , and say , we have no need of their Direction ? Is it ( says he ) for their own ease or gain that they trouble you , or is it for your own everlasting Gain ? Remember that Christ hath said to his Messengers , He that despiseth you , despiseth me . If your obstinate refusal of their Instruction do put any of them to bear witness against you in Judgement , and to say ( Lord , I would have taught these , and admonished them better , but they would not so much as come to me , or speak with me ) look you to it , and answer it as you can , for my part I would not be then in your case for all the World. M r Gurnall says of many , If the Minister stay for them till they send for him to instruct them , he may sooner hear the Bell go for them , then any messenger come for him . You must ( says he of such ) seek them out , and not expect that they will come to you . I confess ( says he ) it is no small unhappiness to some of us , who have to do with a Multitude , that we have neither time nor strength to make our addresses to every particular Person in our Congregations , and attend on them as their needs require ; and yet cannot well satisfie our Consciences otherwise . But let us look to it , that though we cannot do to the height of what we should , we be not found wanting in what we may . Let not the difficulty of our Province make us like some , who when they see they have more work upon their hands , then they can well dispatch , grow sick of it , and sit down out of a lazy Despondency , and do just nothing . O , if once our Hearts were but filled with Zeal for God , and Compassion to our Peoples Souls , we would up and be doing , though we could but lay a brick a day , and God would be with us . In the sixth general Council at Trull in Constantinople it is thus decreed Can. 78. That they that are baptized ought to learn the Belief , and on the first day of the Week to say it over to the Bishop or Presbyter . It would be endless to reckon up the sayings and exhortations of eminent Divines to this purpose ; let it suffice to add further our warrant from God in holy Scripture . Acts 20. 20 , 28 , 31. And how I kept back nothing that was profitable unto you , but have shewed you , and have taught you publickly , and from house to house , Take heed therefore to your selves , and to all the flock over which the Holy Ghost hath made you Overseers , to feed the Church of God , which he hath purchased with his own Blood. By the space of three years I ceased not to warn every one , both night and day with tears . S. Luke 12. 42. Who then is that faithfull and wise Steward , whom his Lord shall make Ruler over his Houshold , to give them their portion of meat in due season ? Col. 1. 28. Whom we preach ; warning every man , and teaching every man in all Wisdom , that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus . Mal. 2. 7. For the Priests lips should keep knowledge , and they should seek the law at his mouth ; for he is the Messenger of the Lord of Hosts . S. Mark 4. 34. And when they were alone he expounded all things to his Disciples . Hebr. 5. 12. Ye have need that one teach you again which be the first Principles of the Oracles of God , and are become such as have need of Milk , and not of strong Meat . 1 Cor. 4 1. Let a man so account of us as of the Ministers of Christ , and Stewards of the Mysteries of God. Hebr. 13. 17. Obey them that have the rule over you , and submit your selves ; for they watch for your Souls , as they that must give an account ; that they may do it with joy , and not with grief ; for that is unprofitable for you . 1 Thess . 5. 12 , 13. We beseech you Brethren , to know them which labour among you , and are over you in the Lord , and admonish you ; and to esteem them very highly in love for their works sake , and be at peace among your selves . A brief Explication or Profession of our Faith , taken out of Scripture , for the better understanding , and improvement of the Apostles Creed . I Believe that there is one only true God , who is a Spirit infinitely glorious , and being One in Nature , is yet Three in Persons ; the Father , the Son , and the Holy Ghost ; which are three and one after a wonderfull and mysterious manner . The Father God , the Son God , and the Holy Ghost God , and yet not three Gods , but one God infinite in Being , Wisdom , Power , and Goodness : the Maker , Preserver and Disposer of all things ; the must just and most mercifull Lord of all . I believe that Mankind being fallen by sin from God and Happiness , under the wrath of God , the curse of his Law , and the power of the Devil , God so loved the World , that he gave his only Son to be their Redeemer ; who being God , and one with the Father , became Man also in the same Person , by taking to him our Nature ; as to which he was conceived by the Holy Ghost of the Virgin Mary , and born of her without sin , and named Jesus Christ ; and having lived on earth without sin , and wrought many miracles for a witness of his Truth , he gave up himself a Sacrifice for our sins , and a Ransom for us , in suffering death on the Cross : and being buried , he rose again the third day , and afterward ascended into Heaven , where he is Lord of all , in Glory with the Father . And having ordained and appointed that all that truly repent , and believe in Him , and love him above all things , and sincerely obey him , and that to the death , shall be saved ; and that they that will not shall be damned ; and commanded his Ministers to publish thus much , and to preach the Gospel to the World ; he will come again , and raise the bodies of all Men from death , and will judge all men according to what they have done in the Body . I believe that God the Holy Ghost , the Spirit proceeding from the Father and the Son , was sent by them to inspire and guide the Prophets and Apostles , that they might fully reveal the Doctrine of Christ , and by multitudes of evident Miracles to be the great witness of Christ , and of the Truth of his holy Word ; and also to dwell and work in all that are drawn to believe ; that being first joyned unto Christ their Head , and into one Church , which is his Body , and so pardoned and made the Sons of God , they may be a peculiar People sanctified to Christ , and may overcome the world , the flesh , and the devil ; and being zealous of good Works , may serve God in Holiness and Righteousness , and may live in the special love and Communion of the Saints , and in hope of Christs appearing , and of everlasting life . I do heartily take this One God in the Trinity of Persons , for my only God , and my chief good ; And this Jesus Christ for my only Lord-Redeemer and Saviour ; And this Holy Ghost for my Sanctifier and Comforter ; and the Doctrine by him revealed , and witnessed by his Miracles , and now contained in the Holy Scriptures , I do take for the Law of God , and the rule of my Faith and Life . And repenting unfeignedly of my sins , I do resolve , through the grace of God , sincerely to obey him , both in Holiness to God , Righteousness to Men , and in special love to the Saints , and in Communion with them , against all the temptations of the devil , flesh , or world , and this to death . The Catechism , or Christian Doctrine and Practice . Note that the first eight Questions and Answers contain the foregoing Profession ; and the four last do express the Particulars contained in the two words Holiness and Righteousness , and in the Ten Commandments . Question 1. What do you believe concerning God ? THere is one only God in three Persons , the Father , the Son , and the Holy Ghost who is Infinite in Being , Power , Wisdom , and Goodness : the Maker , Preserver , and Disposer of all things , and the most just and mercifull Lord of all . 1 Cor. 8. 4 , 6 1 John 5. 7. 1 Tim. 1. 17. Psal . 139. 7 , 8 , 9 Isa . 40. 17. Revel . 4. 8. Psal . 147. 5. Nehem . 9. 6. Psal . 135. 6. Revel . 15. 3. Exod. 34. 6. Quest . 2. How did God make man , and who Law did he give him ? God made Man for himself , after his own image , in Righteousness and true Holiness and gave him a righteous Law , requiring perfect obedience upon pain of death . Prov. 16. 4. Gen. 1. 26 , 27. & 2. 16 , 17. Rom. 6. 23. Deut. 27. 26. Gal. 3. 10. Quest . 3. Did man keep or break this Law ? Man being tempted by Satan , did wilfully sin ; and so fall from God and Happiness , under the wrath of God , the curse of the Law , and the power of the Devil : so that we are by Nature dead in sin , and prone to do more evil continually , and to grow worse , and to depart yet further from God. Gen. 3. Rom. 5. 12 , 18. & 3. 23. & 6. 23. Eph. 2. 12. Hos . 14. 1. Eph. 2. 2 , 3 , 5. Gal. 3. 10 , 13. Acts 26. 18. Gen. 6. 5. 2 Tim. 3. 13. Hos . 13. 2. 2 Tim. 2. 16. Quest . 4. How was Man redeemed ? God so loved the World , that he gave his only begotten Son to be their Redeemer ; who , being God , and One with the Father , did take to him our Nature , and became Man , being conceived by the Holy Ghost of the Virgin Mary , and born of her , and called Jesus Christ , and having lived on earth without sin , and wrought many Miracles for a witness of his Truth ; he gave up himself a Sacrifice for our sins , in suffering death on the Cross , and being buried , he rose again the third day , and afterward ascended into Heaven , where he is Lord of all in Glory with the Father . John 3. 16 , 17. 1 John 2. 2. John 4. 42. Rom. 9. 5. John 10. 30. & 17. 11. Heb. 2. 3 , 4. & 4. 15. & ● . 14. 6. 1 Tim. 2. 5. Luke 1. 27 , 31 , 35. Mat. 1. 18 , 20 , 23. Heb. 4. 15. & 7. 26. Acts 2. 22. & 7. 36. 1 Tim. 2. 6. Mat. 27. 31 , 35 , 60. Tit. 2. 14. Heb. 9. 26. 1 Cor. 15. 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 12. Acts 1 9 , 11. Eph. 4. 8 , 9 , 10 , 11. Acts 10. 36. & 2. 36. Rom. 14. 9. Mat. 28. 18. Eph. 1. 20 , 21 , 22. Quest . 5. How , and on what terms is Salvation offered in the Gospel ? Our Lord Jesus Christ hath ordained in his Testament , that all they that receive him by a true effectual Faith , and that by Repentance forsake the devil , and all his works , the pomps and vanities of the world , and the sinfull lusts of the flesh , and heartily turn from them unto God , shall freely receive the pardon of their sins , and become the Sons of God and Heirs of everlasting Life ; And that if they sincerely love and obey him unto death , they shall be glorified . And that they that will not do all this , shall be damned . And this he hath commanded his Ministers to preach to all the World. 1. Cor. 9. 14. Heb. 9. 15. Col. 2. 6. John 1. 12. Mark 16. 15 , 16. Gal. 5. 6. Jam. 2. 24. Acts 26. 18. Luke 24. 47. Acts 5. 31. & 11. 18. & 20. 21. & 3. 19. & 2. 28. & 8. 22. & 26. 20. Luke 13. 3. Mark 4. 12. Isa . 55. 7. & 1. 16. Ezek. 18. 21 to 32. & 33. 11. to 20. Mat. 19. 27 , 29. & 10. 37. Luke 14. 26 , 27 , 33. Tit. 3. 5 , 7. Heb. 3. 14. Col. 1. 23. John 15. 1. to 12. & 8. 31. Rom. 11. 22. Heb. 10. 26 , 38. Rev. 3. 12. 2 Thes . 2. 12. Mark 16. 15 , 16. Mat. 28. 19 , 20 , 21. Quest . 6. How did Christ reveal and prove his Doctrine . The Holy Ghost was sent by the Father and the Son , to inspire and guide the Prophets and Apostles and Evangelists , that they might truly and fully reveal the Doctrine of Christ , and deliver it in Scripture to the Church , as the rule of our Faith and Life : And by multitudes of evident uncontrolled Miracles , to be the great Witness of Christ , and of the Truth of his Holy Word . Joh. 14. 26. & 15. 26. 1 Pet. 1. 10 , 11 , 12. & 2 Pet. 1. 21. 2 Tim. 3. 16. Joh. 16. 13. Eph. 3. 3 , 5. & 2. 20. & 4. 11 , 12 , 13. Mat. 28. 20. 1 Tim. 6. 14. Isa . 8. 20. Rev. 22. 18 , 19. Heb. 3. 2 , 3. & 2. 3 , 4. Acts 2. 22 & 19. 11. to 19. Gal. 3. 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5. John 14. 12. & 3. 2. & 10. 25 , 37 , 38. 1 Cor. 14. Quest . 7. How are men brought to partake of Christ and Life ? The same Holy Spirit doth by the Word enlighten mens Understandings , and soften and open their Hearts , and turn them from the power of Satan unto God , by Faith in Christ : that being joyned to Christ the Head , and into one Church which is his Body , and freely justified , and made the Children of God , they may be a peculiar People unto him , zealous of good Works , serving God in Holiness and Righteousness , and living in special love and Communion of the Saints , and in hope of Christs coming , and of everlasting Life . Acts 26. 18. Joh. 6. 44. Rom. 8. 9 , 10 , 11. Acts 16. 14. Ezek. 36. 26. Acts 15. 9. 1 Cor. 6. 11 , 19. Col. 1. 18. & 2. 19. Eph. 5. 30 , 31 , 32. & 3. 17. 1 Cor. 12. 13 , 27. Rom. 3 24. Gal. 4. 6. Joh. 1. 12. Gal. 3. 26. Tit. 2. 14. 1 Pet. 2. 9. Rom. 8. 1. to 14. Gal. 5. 17 , 24. 1 Joh. 2. 15. Gal. 6. 14. 1 Joh. 3. 8. Luke 1. 74 , 75. 1 Pet. 1. 22. Joh. 12. 34 , 35. Eph. 2. 19. Heb. 10. 25. 1 Cor. 1. 7. 2 Pet. 3. 11 , 12. Tit. 1. 2. & 3. 7. Quest . 8. What shall be the end of the Righteous and of the Wicked ? The Lord Jesus Christ will come again at the end of this World , and will raise the Bodies of all Men from the dead , and judge all men according to their works : And the Righteous shall go into everlasting Life , and the rest into everlasting Punishment . Acts 1. 11. 1 Cor. 15. 1 Thes . 4. 16 , 17 , 18. Joh. 5. 22 , 27. 2 Cor. 5. 10. Rom. 2. 6 , 7. Mat. 25. 2 Thes . 1. 8 , 9 , 10. & 2. 12. 2 Tim. 4. 8 , 18. Luke 10. 11. Joh. 17. 24. & 12. 26. Mat. 13. 40. to 43. Quest . 9. What are the publick means which Christ hath appointed to Salvation ? Christ hath appointed that fit Men shall be ordained Bishops and Pastors in his Church to disciple the uncalled , and baptize all that are Disciples in the name of the Father , Son , and Holy Ghost , and to congregate his Disciples , and to oversee and guide the several Congregations , and each Member thereof . Particularly to teach them the Word of God , to pray and praise God with them and for them ; to administer the Lords Supper in remembrance of him ; and to bless them in the Name of the Lord : Especially on the Lords-Day , which he hath appointed for Holy Communion in such works : Also to rebuke with authority the scandalous and unruly , and to reject those that are obstinately impenitent and unreformed . It is therefore the Peoples duty to joyn with such Churches in the foresaid worship of God ; and to know , hear , submit to , and obey these their Guides that are over them in the Lord , and to avoid Discord and Division , and to live in Unity , Love and Peace . Mat. 28. 19 , 20. Mark 16. 15. Rom. 10. 7 , 8 , 14 , 15. 1 Tim. 3. 1 , 2. 2 Tim. 2. 2. Acts 14. 23. Acts 2. 42. & 20. 7 , 28. Eph. 4. 11 , 12 , 14. Ezek. 3. 17 , 18 , 21. Mal. 2. 7. 1 Cor. 12. 17 , 28 , 29. Col. 1. 28. Acts 26. 18. Jam. 5. 14. Neh. 11. 17. & 9. 5. & 8. 4 , 5 , 6 , 8. 1 Cor. 10. 16. & 9. 13 , 14. & 11. 24. Num. 6. 23 , 24. Deut. 10. 8. 1 Chr. 23. 13. Heb. 7. 7 , 8 , 9 , 10. 1 Cor. 9. 1 Cor. 4. 1. 1 Tim. 4 13 , 14 , 15. Rev. 1. 10. Acts 20. 7. 1 Cor. 16. 2. Mark 1● . 2 , 9. Joh. 20 1 , 19. Tit. 2. 15. & 1 9 , 11. 1 Tim. 5. 1 , 19 , 20. & 3. 5. Tit. 3. 10. 1 Cor. 5. 4 , 5 , 11 , 13. Acts 2. 42. Heb. 13. 7 , 17 , 24. 1 Thes . 5. 17. 1 Cor. 16. 16. Luke 12. 42. & 10. 16. 1 Cor. 1. 10. & 3. 3. Rom. 16. 17. Eph. 4. 2 , 15 , 16. Col. 2. 2. 2 Cor. 13. 11. Quest . 10. What are the secret Holy Duties which every one must use . The secret Duties of Holiness are frequent and serious Meditation of God , and his Word and Works , of our own sin and danger , of our Redemption , of our Duty , of our Death , Judgement , and the endless Joy or Torment after it : The diligent examination of our own hearts , and watching over our thoughts , affections , words , and actions : The mortifying of our sins , especially unbelief , error , hardness of Heart , pride , worldliness , sensuality , and hypocrisie : The exercise of all Graces ; watching against temptations , and resolute resisting them : And secret Prayer unto God. Psal . 104. 34. & 119. 97 , 99. & 1. 2. & 63. 6. & 77. 12. & 143. 5. & 119. 59. Hag. 1. 5. Deut. 32. 29. Psal . 50. 22. 2 Cor. 13. 5. Psal . 4. 4. Prov. 4. 23. Mat. 5. 28. & 12. 34 & 15. 18 , 19. Psal . 119. 113. & 39. 1. Mar. 13. 33. Luke 21. 8 , 34. 1 Cor. 10. 12. Col. 3. 5. Heb. 3. 12 , 13 , 14. Mat. 24. 4. Luke 12. 15. Rom. 13. 13 , 14. Mat. 6. 6 , 16. 1 Cor. 3. 18. Jer. 17. 9. 1 Pet. 2. 1. 2 Tim. 1. 6. & 4. 7. Acts 24. 16 , Mat. 26. 41. 1 Cor. 16. 13. Eph. 6. 11. to 19. 1 Thes . 5. 17. Acts 10. 9. Luke 6. 12. Quest . 11. What private duties of Holiness must be performed with others ? The private duties of Holiness to be performed with others , are these ; Parents and Masters must teach their children and servants the Word , and fear of God , and pray with them , and for them ; and hinder them from sin . Children and Servants must willingly learn and obey . Husbands and Wives must be loving , faithfull , and helpfull to each other , especially in the best things which concern their eternal Welfare . We must seek advice in the matters of Salvation : especially of our Teachers : we must friendly , prudently and faithfully admonish and exhort one another ; using gracious and edifying Conference , and a winning Conversation . Eph. 6. 4. Deut. 6. 7. & 11. 18. Josh . 24. 15. Psal . 101. 2 , 3. Acts 10. 30. Gen. 18. 19. Prov. 22. 6 , 15. & 25. 13. 1 Sam. 2. 23 , 29. Col. 3. Eph. 6. 1 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 8. Deut. 21. 18 , 20. Mal. 2. 7. Jer. 6. 16. & 50. 5. 1 Cor. 14. 35. Acts 2. 37. & 16. 30. Rom. 15. 14. Heb. 3. 13. Eph. 4. 29. 1 Pet. 3. 1 , 2. Jam. 3. 13. Acts 12. 5 , 12. Col. 1. 3. & 4. 3. 1 Thess . 3. 10. Quest . 12. What are the necessary duties of Righteousness and Mercy towards Men ? The necessary duties of Righteousness and Mercy towards Men are such as these ; Superiours must rule for God , and the Common-good , with justice and mercy : Inferiours must willingly obey them in the Lord. We must deal truly , and be diligent in our Places and Callings ; We must love our Neighbours as our selves ; and do as we would be done by ; behaving our selves to all Men in meekness , harmlesness , sobriety and truth : not wronging any in their Bodies , Chastity , Estates , or Names , no not in desire , but forbearing and forgiving one another , loving our very Enemies ; and doing good to all according to our Power . Deut. 1. 17. 2 Chr. 19. 6 , 7. Deut. 17. 18 , 19. Josh . 1. 8. Isa . 56. 1. Zach. 7. 9. Rom. 13. 1 , 2 , 3. 1 Pet. 2. 13. Eph. 6. 1 , 5. 1 Cor. 7. 20 , 21. Col. 3. 20 , 22 , 23 , 24. Mat. 19. 19. & 22. 39. & 7. 12. Eph. 4. 2. Phil. 2. 3 , 15. Mat. 10. 16. Eph. 4. 25. Tit. 2. 12. Col. 3. 25. 1 Cor. 6. 7 , 8. Mat. 5. 21 , 22 , 23 , 24 , 25 , 27 , 28 , 39 , 44 , 45. Eph. 4. 28. Exod. 20. 16. Psal . 15. 3. Col. 3. 13. Eph. 4. 2. Mat. 5. 44. Gal. 6. 10. Heb. 13. 16. Mat. 25. Phil. 2. 4 , 20 , 21. 2 Cor. 8. 11 , 12. Concerning the Sick. FIrst , When thou findest thy self visited with sickness , thou art presently to remember that it is God who with rebukes doth chasten Man for sin , and therefore let thy first care be to find out what it is that provokes him to smite thee ; and to that purpose examine diligently thine own heart and ways , and confess thy sins humbly and penitently unto God , begging most earnestly his Mercy and Pardon in Christ Jesus , and putting on sincere and zealous Resolutions of forsaking every evil way for the rest of that time which God shall spare thee . Secondly , That your own Heart deceive you not in this so weighty a business which is for Eternity , it will be your Wisdom , before your Disease prevail too much upon you , to send for some godly Divine , your own Minister especially , under whose care you live , and who may be best acquainted with your Condition ; using his help to settle your Conscience aright , and to make your Peace with God. And to that end , open your heart so freely unto him that he may be able to judge , whether your Repentance be such , as may give you Confidence to appear before Gods dreadfull Tribunal ; and if it be not , that he may help you what he can towards the making of it so . Thirdly , Let it be remembred , that there is also a Private Communion of the Sick , which People generally are so far from seeking after , that though we often , and earnestly desire them , they are but few comparatively , who , as S. James enjoyns Ch. 5. 14. Call or send for the Elders of the Church , or Ministers of Religion , to pray with or over them , and to perform such other Duties belonging to the Visitation of the Sick , as may fit them if they recover , for a more holy Life ; or if they die for a more happy Death . Lastly , Take notice that I have not here set down any Prayers for the Sick , as is usually done in such Books of Devotion , because I would have Neighbours oftner to acquaint me with their sickness , in order to my Visiting of them ; And then as occasion shall require , I shall be ready to help them to such Prayers and Meditations as may be sutable to their Condition , which they may make use of in my absence . Grace before Meat . O God be mercifull unto us , and bless us ; and injoying of these thy Gifts , give them strength to nourish us , and us Grace to serve and please Thee , through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . After Meat . Gods holy Name be blessed and praised , for these and all other his Benefits vouchsafed unto us ; he save his Church , our King , Queen , and these Realms ; comfort the afflicted , and send us Peace in Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . A short Grace before Meat . O God bless these thy good Creatures unto our use , and us unto thy service , through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . After Meat . We praise thee , O God , for these and all other thy Mercies bestowed upon us , through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . Or this . Enable us , O , God , with thankfull hearts to live in the strength of these thy Mercies , to thy Praise and Glory , through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . Children or Servants may be taught to say the larger , or at least , the shorter of these Graces , when Parents or Family-Guides please not to do it themselves . It is a duty of daily Practice to own and praise God as being the Authour and Giver of all our outward Enjoyments , and to crave his Blessing upon them . It is very unseemly for Christians to go to their Meals like brute creatures , we are taught better by the Holy Scriptures . S. Mat. 14. 19. S. John 6. 9 , 10 , 11. Acts 27. 35. 1 Tim. 4. 3 , 4 , 5. FINIS . Notes, typically marginal, from the original text Notes for div A25834-e280 S. Mat. 6. 33. Ph. 2. 12. S. Luke 24. 47. 2 Cor. 6. 8. Acts 20. 30. 1 Cor. 11. 19. 2 Pet. 3. 16. Eph. 4. 12 , 14. Heb. 13. 9. Heb. 10. 23. Notes for div A25834-e1600 Conf. l. 1 c. 4. If in the Morning . If in the Evening . Here thou mayst confess to God those sins thou art most guilty of . * Here beg strength against those sins thou are especially in danger of . * Here praise God for special Blessings concerning thy self or others . * Leaving out the three last Lines , and saying ( Particularly for the Mercies of the Day past ) it will also be a Prayer for the Evening . * Here thou mayst pray for special Mercies for thy self or others . See the Lords Prayer and Blessing , page 23. Notes for div A25834-e3430 Canon 13. of those 103. Vide late Act for the Lords-Day . * Here reckon up those particular sins which thou art conscious of . Notes for div A25834-e5870 Psal . 103. * Here make thy special Requests for thy self and others . Notes for div A25834-e6460 * Page 62 , 63. 
A09377	----	Christian oeconomie: or, A short survey of the right manner of erecting and ordering a familie according to the scriptures. First written in Latine by the author M. W. Perkins, and now set forth in the vulgar tongue, for more common vse and benefit, by Tho. Pickering Bachelar of Diuinitie. Perkins, William, 1558-1602. 1609 Approx. 211 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 104 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2004-11 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A09377 STC 19677 ESTC S102572 99838344 99838344 2719 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A09377) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 2719) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 1113:02) Christian oeconomie: or, A short survey of the right manner of erecting and ordering a familie according to the scriptures. First written in Latine by the author M. W. Perkins, and now set forth in the vulgar tongue, for more common vse and benefit, by Tho. Pickering Bachelar of Diuinitie. Perkins, William, 1558-1602. Pickering, Thomas, d. 1625. aut [16], 175, [1] p. Imprinted by Felix Kyngston, and are to be sold by Edmund Weauer, At London : 1609. Running title reads: Of Christian oeconomie, or household gouernment. Some print faded and show-through; M8 torn, affecting page number. Reproduction of the original in the British Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. 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Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Family -- Religious life -- Early works to 1800. 2004-07 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2004-07 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2004-08 Rachel Losh Sampled and proofread 2004-08 Rachel Losh Text and markup reviewed and edited 2004-10 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion Christian Oeconomie : OR , A SHORT SVRVEY OF THE RIGHT MANNER OF erecting and ordering a Familie , according to the Scriptures . First written in Latine by the Author M. W. PERKINS , and now set forth in the vulgar tongue , for more common vse and benefit , by THO. PICKERING Bachelar of Diuinitie . PROV . 24. 3 , 4. Through wisdome is an house builded , and with vnderstanding it is established . And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches . AT LONDON Imprinted by Felix Kyngston , and are to be sold by Edmund Weauer . 1609. TO THE RIGHT HONORABLE ROBERT Lord RICH , Baron of Leeze , &c. RIght Honorable ; Among al the Societies & States , wherof the whole world of mankinde from the first calling of Adam in Paradise , vnto this day , hath consisted , the first and most ancient is the Familie . For if we looke into the Scriptures ; The writings of Moses , which in time goe beyond all the Histories and Records of men , doe euidently declare , it was the will of God , to sanctifie that first coniunction of Adam and Eue , as the roote wherein mans whole posteritie was virtually contained , and whence in the ages succeeding , both Church and Common-weale should spring and grow to their perfection . And all those nations and Countries before the Flood , the Heads whereof lineally descended frō the two first houses of Seth and Cain , had no outward forme of ciuill gouernment , by which they were ruled , nor any visible face of a Church whereto they had relation , but the whole frame of their policie both Ciuill and Ecclesiasticall was confined within the precincts of priuate families . And from the flood , the house of Noah became the common Mother , in which the other two states were included , and out of whose bowels they issued afterward in the multiplication of posteritie , for number , equall to the starres of the skie , and the sands by the sea shore . Answerable to the voice of the scripture , hath been the verdict of the Heathen in this point . Some of the * learned among them , haue called the Familie , the first societie in nature , and the ground of all the rest . Some againe haue compared it to the Bee-hiue , which we call the Stock , wherein are bred many swarmes , which thence doe flie abroad into the world , to the raising and maintaining of other States . Others do not vnfitlie resemble the same to a Metropolis , or mother Citie , which first traineth vp her natiue inhabitants , and then * remoueth some of them to other places of abode , where they may bee framed as members , to liue in obedience to the lawes of their Head. Vpon this condition of the Familie , being the Seminarie of all other Societies , it followeth , that the holie and righteous gouernment thereof , is a direct meane for the good ordering , both of Church and Common-wealth ; yea that the lawes thereof being rightly informed and religiously obserued , are auaileable to prepare and dispose men to the keeping of order in other gouernements . Hence it is , that the Holie Ghost in the booke of the Scriptures , hath in great wisedome commended both Rules for direction , and examples for imitation , to Husbands and Wiues , to Parents and Children , to Masters and Seruants in euerie point of Christian carriage touching God and man. For this first Societie , is as it were the Schoole , wherein are taught and learned the principles of authoritie and subiection . And look as the Superiour that faileth in his priuate charge , will proue vncapable of publike employment ; so the Inferiour , who is not framed to a course of Oeconomicall subiection , will hardly vndergoe the yoke of ciuill obedience . Againe , the corruption or declination of this first gouernment , must of necessitie giue way to the ruinating of the rest . For an error in the foundation , puts the bodie and parts of the whole building in apparent hazard . In the old world , before the flood , though all flesh had corrupted their waies ; yet the first ground of that vniuersall ouerflow of sinne , issued out of the state Oeconomicall , and thence was deriued into the whole earth . It was the fault of the priuate gouernment of Eli the Priest , that made his sonnes Hophni and Phinehas , of vngratious children , vngodlie Church-men . It was the error of Dauid in the administration and guidance of his owne house , which incouraged Absalom and Adoniah his sonnes , vpon presumption of their Fathers indulgēce , to become ill Common-wealths men , to aspire , and vsurpe the kingdom by plots and practises of Rebellion . To forbeare further matter of instance in this kinde ; by the due consideration of the premisses , I hold it a thing both necessarie and behoofefull for al estates , to be throughly informed of the right manner of erecting and ordering the priuate condition of the Familie , whereby they may be furnished with fit grounds for the commō good in more publike and open courses . For which end this present Discourse of Christian Oeconomie , was first contriued by the Author , and now thought fit to be set foorth , for the instruction and edification of y e multitude . Which as it commendeth it selfe by the shortnes and perspicuitie , both which being applied to vnderstanding and memorie , may giue contentment to euerie well-disposed Reader ; so it carrieth a kinde of eminencie aboue other Treatises of this nature before published , in sundrie regards . First , whereas Experience teacheth , that the Questions of conscience in matrimoniall affaires , are very many in number , and difficult in nature ; here we shall finde either direct answeres to some of them , or at least the grounds of resolution in diuers cases , warranted by the word , in such sort , as little or nothing will appeare , vpon the triall , to be vntouched , making for the Readers satisfaction . Secondlie , the maine scope of the Author in the seuerall branches hereof , is , to make plaine this truth in particular , That no Familie can bee interessed in the blessing and fauour of God , which is not founded in his feare , and ordered according to his reuealed will. For though the Heathen in their writings of the like Argument , doe shew , that Nature by her dimme light may affoord some good directions to this purpose , and that men meerely natural , haue prospered in the practise of Oeconomicall vertues ; yet the true happines of houses and inhabitants wholly dependeth vpon the speciall grace of God , and issueth out of his promise ; and that is directed onely to them that feare him and walke in his waies ; it being godlinesse alone which hath the promises of this life and the life to come . Therefore to dreame of a blessing in any other state , which is not seasoned with godlinesse , and ordered by direction of diuine lawe , is but a witlesse presumption ; considering that the familie it selfe from whence they grow , hath no further assurance of blessednesse , then it hath right and title in the promise . Lastly , it containeth here and there , some speciall grounds of trueth , tending to the discouerie of diuers errors of Popish doctrine in points appertaining to Mariage ; as namely these ; I. That this estate is free to all men , euen to such as haue the gift of continencie ▪ and for those who haue not the power to abstaine , it is expressely enioyned by God as necessarie . Which discouereth that error of absolute inhibition thereof to some sorts of men , without the least exception of abilitie to forbeare . And in this case , though the Church of Rome prescribeth an helpe by prayer and indeuour , where the gift is wanting ; yet herein , she addeth two more absurdities to the former ; imposing a necessitie of containing , by her lawes , where God hath giuen libertie , by his word ; and causing to flee from that onely Remedie which himselfe hath sanctified , to another , whereunto hee neither giueth charge by his will , nor incouragement by promise . II. That Marriages consummate without the free and aduised consent of Parents , either explicite in tearmes , or implicite by conniuence , are in the court of conscience , meere nullities . A doctrine cleered in this Booke , both by Scriptures , and by consent of Antiquitie . Wherein is challenged the Iesuites proposition , That the sole consent of the parties is sufficient , ad Matrimonium firmum ac ratum efficiendum . As also that decree of the Councell of Trent , which professeth a detestation of clandestine contracts , and yet with the same breath pronounceth the curse of Anathema vpon them , who affirme that Parents may ratifie or make voide Mariages contracted by their children , without their allowance . III. That Matrimonie lawfullie begun and consummate , is made voide onely by way of diuorce in the case of Adulterie . So saith our Sauiour ; Whosoeuer shall put away his wife , ( except it be for fornication , &c. ) And this liberty granted by Christ both to dissolue , and to marrie againe , cannot be restrained or cut off by any humane ordinance . A point directlie impugned by two other Rules of that Councell . One , that the Church of Rome erreth not , when she teacheth ( as they professe , Iuxta Euangelicam & Apostolicam doctrinam , but in truth expressely contradictory thereunto ) That the knot of mariage cannot be broken because of adulterie , and that neither partie may vndertake to be maried againe , during the life of the other , after the dismission . The other , that the vow of Chastitie and entring into holy Orders , is of force to loose the bond of Mariage . And in this case , separation is made and allowed de facto , by the sole authoritie of the Pope , notwithstanding the refusall of the setled partie to yeeld consent . IV. That the iudgement and determination of causes matrimoniall , as of Contracts and their impediments , of degrees of kinred , of diuorces , &c. resteth originally in the ciuill Magistrate , in whose power it is , to ordaine and establish lawes touching them , agreeable to Gods word , and to cause them to be put in execution . For this purpose , in doubtfull and difficult cases , the a ancient Church hath not absolutely rested in her owne decrees , but hath made recourse to the seate of Iustice , specially vnder Christian Magistrates , submitting her selfe to their lawes and constitutions in that kinde . Whereas the b Church of Rome hath determined , that these causes doe simplie and only appertaine to Ecclesiasticall Iudges ; and therefore hath concluded Mariage to be a Sacrament ; that the definition of cases coniugall , becomming , vpon this ground , an action of a spirituall nature , might be transferred from the Ciuill to their spirituall Courts . The soueraigntie whereof ; in these affaires , by their owne constitutions , is greatly inlarged . For though they admit , that politike Princes haue some interest in them ; yet they must hold it , with subordination to the autoritie of the Church-Magistrate ; and when the Rector of the Prouince maketh a law hereof , hee must doe it approbante Principe Ecclesiastico , by the allowance of the Pope ; otherwise his lawes are meere nullities . And among their reasons of policie , this is one of the principall , that they might by this meanes raise a commoditie to the Sea of Rome , by the sale of their dispensations . Now these points , together with the substance of this small discourse , I willingly commend vnto your Lordship , desiring that vnder the wings of your Honourable protection , it may safelie walke abroad in the world , to the view and benefit of others . The true report of your ancient loue of the truth , and fauourable inclination to the Ministers and dispensers thereof , hath giuen mee incouragement in this action ; the rather , for that the Argument fitteth in some sort your present estate , whose house God hath adorned with oliue plants , a vertuous and hopefull issue , whose young yeeres being seasoned therein , by the sweete sauour of their fathers vertues , may yeeld in time a plentifull increase of Honour in this Common-wealth ; and consequentlie aduance your Name in themselues and their posteritie . To this may be added mine own desire to giue some testimonie of dutie to your Lordship , as holding it your due , to be had in Honourable tearmes with men , whose care hath been to maintaine the Honour of the Highest by your constant profession and practise of Religion . And thus emboldening my selfe vpon the perswasion of your Lordships fauour and acceptance , I humblie take my leaue , and commend you to the grace of God , who is able to build you vp further , and giue you an inheritance among them which are sanctified . Finching-field , Septemb . 26. 1609. Your Lordships to be commanded in all Christian dutie , THO. PICKERING . A SHORT SVRVEY OF THE RIGHT MANNER OF ERECTING and ordering a Familie , according to the Scriptures . CHAP. I. Of Christian Oeconomie , and of the Familie . CHristian Oeconomie , is a doctrine of the right ordring of a Familie . The onely rule of ordering the Family , is the written word of God. By it Dauid resolued to gouerne his House , whē he saith , I will walke in the vprightnesse of my heart in the midst of my house , Psal. 101. 2. And Salomon affirmeth , that through wisdome an house is builded , and with vnderstanding it is established , Prou. 24. 3. A Familie , is a naturall and simple Societie of certaine persons , hauing mutuall relation one to another , vnder the priuate gouernement of one . These persons must be at the least three ; because two cannot make a societie . And aboue three vnder the same head , there may be a thousand in one familie , as it is in the households of Princes , and men of state in the world . CHAP. 2. Of the Household seruice of God. A Family , for the good estate of it selfe , is bound to the performance of two duties ; one to God , the other to it selfe . The dutie vnto God , is the priuate Worship and Seruice of God , which must be established and setled in euery family . And the reasons hereof are these . First , because this duty standeth by the expresse commandement of God , who by his Apostle willeth men to pray ●●ery where , lifting vp pure hands , without ●●rath or doubting , 1. Tim. 2. 8. Againe , it is confirmed by the cu●●ome and practise of holy men in their ●mes ; I know ( saith the Lord touching Abraham ) that he will commaund his sonnes and his household after him , that ●hey keepe the way of the Lord to doe righ●●eousnesse and iudgement , that the Lord may bring vpon Abraham , that which he hath spoken to him , ●en . 18. 19. To the same purpose speaketh Ioshua ; If it seeme euill vnto you to serue the Lord , chuse this day whom yee will serue , whether the gods whom your Fathers serued ( that were beyond the floud ) or the gods of the Amorites in whose land ye dwell : But I and my house will serue the Lord , Iosh. 24. 15. And Cornelius is reported to haue been a deuout man , and one that feared God with all his household , Act. 10. 2. Thirdly , common reason and equitie sheweth it to be a necessarie dutie ; for the happie and prosperous estate of the familie , which consisteth in the mutuall loue and agreement of the Man and Wife , in the dutifull obedience of children to their parents , and in the faithfull seruice of seruants to their Masters , wholly dependeth vpon the grace and blessing of God , and this blessing is annexed to his worship : for 1. Tim. 4. 8. Godlinesse hath the promises of this life , and the life to come . Psalm . 127. 1. Except the Lord builde the house , they labour in vaine that builde ; except the Lord keepe the Citie , the keeper watcheth in vaine . Vers. 2. It is in vaine for you to rise early , and to lie downe late , and eate the bread of sorrow , but he will surely giue rest to his beloued . Vers. 3. Beholde , children are the inheritance of Iehouah , and the fruite of the wombe his rewarde . Psalm . 128. 1. Blessed is euery one that feareth the Lord , and walketh in his waies . Vers. 2. When thou eatest the labours of thy hands thou shalt be blessed , and it shall bee well with thee . Vers. 3. Thy wife shall be as the fruitefull vine vpon the sides of thy house , and thy children like Oliue plants round about thy table . Vers. 6. Yea , thou shalt see thy childrens children , and peace vpon Israel . 1. Sam. 1. 27. I prayed ( saith Hannah ) for this childe , and the Lord hath giuen mee my desire which I asked of him . The household seruice of God hath two parts ; the first is a conference vpon the word of God , for the edification of all the members thereof , to eternall life . The second is , Inuocation of the name of God , with giuing of thankes for his benefits ; both these are commended in the Scriptures . Deut. 6. 6. These words which I command thee this day , shall be in thy heart . Vers. 7. And thou shalt whet them vpon thy children , & talke of thē whē thou tariest in thine house , & as thou walkest by the way , and when thou liest downe , and when thou risest vp . Vers. 20. When thy sonne shall aske thee in time to come , saying , what meane these testimonies , and ordinances , and lawes , which the Lord our God hath commanded you ? Vers. 21. Then thou shalt say vnto thy son , we were Pharaohs bondmē in Egypt , but the Lord brought vs out of Egypt with a mightie hand . Vers. 24. Therefore the Lord hath commanded vs to do all these ordināces , & to fear the Lord our God. Psal. 14. 1. The foole hath said in his heart , There is no God. v. 4. They cal not vpō God. The times of this seruice are these : The morning , in which the familie comming together in one place , is to call vpon the name of the Lord , before they begin the workes of their callings . The euening also is another time to be vsed in prayer , because the familie hath seene the blessing of God vpon their labours the day before , and now the time or rest draweth on , in which euery one is to commend his body and soule into the protection of the Lord ; for no man knoweth what shall befall him before he rise again , neither knoweth any whether euer he shal rise againe or not , it is therefore a desperate boldnesse without praying to go to rest . Besides this , there be other times also wherein to performe this dutie , as before and after meales ; For meats and drinkes are blessed to the receiuers , by the word and prayer . 1. Tim. 4. 4. Whatsoeuer God hath created is good , neither is any thing to be refused , if it be taken with thankesgiuing , for it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer . Now these times , the word of God approueth . Deut. 6. 6. Thou shalt talke of them , when thou liest downe , aud when thou risest vp . Psalm . 55. 18. Euening and morning and at noone , I will pray and make a noise , and he wil heare my voice . Psa. 127. 1. It is in vaine to rise earely , and to lie downe late , and eate the bread of sorrow , except the Lord vouchsafe a blessing , who will surely giue rest to his beloued . To these may sometimes be added the exercise of fasting , which is ( as occasiō serueth ) to be vsed both publikely & priuately , especially when they of the familie be therunto called by some present or imminent calamitie . Hest. 4. 16. Go and assemble all the Iewes that are found in Shusan , and fast yee for mee , and eate not , nor drinke in three daies , day nor night : I also and my maids will fast likewise , and so will I go in to the King , which is not according to the law ; and if I perish , I perish . Zachar. 12. 11. And in that day shall there be a great mourning in Ierusalem , and the land shall bewaile , euery familie apart , the family of the house of Dauid apart , and their wiues apart , the family of the house of Nathan apart , and their wiues apart , &c. Wherefore , those families wherein this seruice of God is performed , are , as it were , little Churches , yea euen a kind of paradise vpon earth . And for this purpose S. Paul writing to Philemon , greeteth the Church that is in his house , Philem. 1. 2. And in like manner , he sendeth salutations to the Church of Corinth , from Aquila and Priscilla , and the Church which was in their house , 1. Cor. 16. 19. On the otherside , where this dutie of Gods seruice is not vsed , but either for the most part , or altogether neglected , a man may tearme those families , no better then companies of prophane and gracelesse Atheists , who as they deny God in their harts , so they are knowne by this note , that they doe not call vpon the name of the Lord , Psalm . 14. 4. Yea such families are fitly compared to an heard of swine , which are alwaies feeding vpon the maste with greedinesse , but neuer looke vp to the hand that beateth it downe , nor to the tree from whence it falleth . The other dutie concerning the house it selfe , is , That euery member in the familie , according to their abilitie , employ themselues in some honest and profitable businesse , to maintaine the temporall estate and life of the whole . Gen. 3. 19. In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread , till thou returne to the earth , for out of it wast thou taken ; for dust thou art , and to dust shalt thou returne . 1. Cor. 7. 20. Let euery man abide in the same vocation wherein he was called . Now if any one in the familie starteth aside out of his calling , and inticeth another to idolatrie , he is to be reuealed , Deut. 13. 6. And againe , their case is very fearefull that do nothing in their houses , but go finely and faire daintily from day to day . This is the blacke marke that the Scripture sets vpon the rich glutton , Luk. 16. 19. There was a certaine rich man , which was cloathed in purple aud fine linen , and fared deliciously euery day . CHAP. 3. Of maried folkes . A Familie is distinguished into sundry combinations or couples of persons . A couple , is that wherby two persons standing in mutuall relation to each other , are combined together as it were in one . And of these two , the one is alwaies higher , and beareth rule , the other is lower , and yeeldeth subiection . Couples are of two sorts ; principall , or lesse principall . The principall , is the combination of maried folkes ; and these are so termed in respect of Mariage . Mariage is the lawfull coniunction of the two maried persons ; that is , of one man , and one woman into one flesh . So was the first institution of mariage , Gen. 2. 21. which is expounded by our Sauiour Christ , Matth. 19. 6. Therfore they are no more two , but one flesh . And also by Paul , Ephes. 5. 31. For this cause shall a man leaue father and mother , and shall * cleaue vnto his wife , ( as two boords are ioyned together with glue ) and they which were two , shall be one flesh . Wherefore this is an eternal law of mariage , that two , and not three or foure , shall be one flesh . And for this cause , the fathers , who had many wiues and Concubines , it may be that through custome they sinned of ignorance , yet they are not in any wise to be excused . Mariage of it selfe is a thing indifferent , and the kingdome of God stands no more in it , then in meats and drinks ; and yet it is a state in it selfe , farre more excellent , then the condition of single life . For first , it was ordained by God in Paradise , aboue and before all other states of life , in Adams innocencie before the fall . Againe , it was instituted vpon a most serious and solemne consultation among the three persons in the holy Trinitie . Genes . 1. 26. Let vs make man in our image , according to our likenesse , and let them rule ouer , &c. Gen. 2. 18. Iehouah Elohim said , It is not good that the man should be himselfe alone , I will make him an helpe meete for him . Thirdly , the manner of this coniunction was excellent , for God ioyned our first parents Adam and Eue together immediately . Fourthly , God gaue a large blessing vnto the estate of mariage , saying , Increase and multiplie and fill the earth . Lastly , mariage was made & appointed by God himselfe , to be the fountaine and seminarie of all other sorts & kinds of life , in the Common-wealth and in the Church . Now if mankind had continued in that vprightnes and integritie which it had by creation , the state of single life had been of no price and estimation amongst men , neither should it haue had any place in the world , without great contempt of Gods ordinance and blessing . Neuerthelesse , since the fall , to some men who haue the gift of continencie , it is in many respects farre better then mariage , yet not simplie , but only by accident , in regard of sundrie calamities which came into the world by sin . For , first it freeth a man from many and great cares of houshold affaires . Againe , it maketh him much more fit & disposed to meditate of heauenly things , without distraction of mind . Besides that , when dangers are either present , or imminent , in matters belonging to this life , the single person is in this case happie , because he and his are more secure and safe , then others be who are in maried state . 1. Cor. 7. 8. Therefore I say to the vnmaried and widowes , It is good for them if they abide euen as I do . vers . 26. I suppose then this to be good for the present necessitie , I meane , that it is good for a man so to be , vers . 28. But if thou takest a wife thou sinnest not , and if a virgin marrie she sinneth not ; neuerthelesse such shall haue trouble in the flesh , vers . 32. And I would haue you without care . The end of mariage is fourefold . The first is , procreation of children , for the propagation and continuance of the seed and posteritie of man vpon the earth , Gen. 1. 28. Bringforth fruit multiplie , fill the earth , and subdue it , Genes . 9. 1. 1. Tim. 5. 14. The second is the procreation of an holy seed , wherby the Church of God may be kept holy and chaste , and there may alwaies be a holy company of men , that may worship and serue God in the Church from age to age , Malach. 2. 15. And did not he make one ? yet had hee abundance of spirit ; and wherefore one ? because he sought a godly seed . The third is , that after the fall of mankind , it might be a soueraigne meanes to auoid fornication , and consequently to subdue and slake the burning lusts of the flesh , 1. Cor. 7. 2. Neuerthelesse for the auoiding of fornication , let euery man haue his wife , and euery woman haue her husband . vers . 9. But if they cannot abstaine , let them marrie ; for it is better to marrie , then to burne . And for this cause , some Schoolemen doe erre , who hold that the secret comming together of man and wife , cannot be without sinne , vnlesse it be done for procreation of children . Lombard the master of the Sentences saith the contrarie , namely , that mariage before the fall was only a dutie , but now since the fall it is also remedie . The fourth end is , that the parties married may thereby performe the duties of their callings , in better and more comfortable manner . Prou. 31. 11. The heart of her husband trusteth her , and hee shall haue no need of spoile . vers . 13. She seeketh wooll , and flaxe , and laboureth cheerefully with her hands . Mariage is free to al orders , and sorts of men without exception , euen to those that haue the gift of contimencie ; but for them which cannot abstaine , it ●s , by the expresse commandement of God , necessarie . Hebr. 13. 4. Mariage is honorable amongst all men , and the bed vndefiled . 1 Cor. 7. 9. But if they cannot abstaine , let them marrie . By which it appeareth to be a cleare case , that the commandement of the Pope of Rome , whereby he forbiddeth mariage of certaine persons , as namely , of Clergie men , is meerely diabolicall ; for so writeth the Apostle , 1. Tim. 4. 1. The spirit speaketh euidently , that in the latter times some shall depart frō the faith , and shall giue heed vnto spirits of error , and doctrines of diuels , vers . 3. forbidding to marrie . But against this doctrine sundrie things are alleaged . Obiect . 1. The Apostle commandeth the married among the Corinthes , to abstaine with consent for a time , that they might giue themselues to fasting and praier , 1. Cor. 7. 5. I answere , that Paul speakes not in that place of daily and common seruice of God in prayer , but of the solemne and extraordinarie exercise therof , which was ioyned with fasting and abstinence , in common dangers and calamities . Obiect . 2. 1. Cor. 7. 32. He that is vnmarried careth for the things of the Lord , how he may please the Lord ; but the married person careth for the things of the world . Answ. The place is not generally to be vnderstood of all , but indefinitely of those married persons that are carnall and fleshly . And he that is married , is to bee so carefull for the things of the world , as that he ought , and may haue also a special regard of those things that concerne God and his kingdome . Obiect . 3. 1. Tim. 5. 11. The yonger widowes ( saith the Apostle ) will marrie , hauing damnation because they haue broken the first faith . Answ. By the first faith , Paul vnderstandeth that promise and vow which they made vnto Christ , when they were baptised ; and they are there said to begin to waxe wanton against Christ , by denying or renouncing that faith , and not otherwise . Obiect . 4. He that doth earnestly and from his heart , craue the gift of continencie , God will giue it him , and therfore he need not marrie . Answ. The gifts of God are of two sorts , some are Generall , some are Proper Generall gifts are such as God giueth generally to all , and these may be obtained , if they be asked according to Gods word , lawfully , Iam. 1. 5. If any of you lacke wisedome , let him aske it of God , who giueth to all men liberally , and reprocheth no man , and it shall bee giuen him . vers . 6. But let him aske in faith , and wauer not . Proper gifts , are those which are giuen only to some certaine men ; of which sort is the gift of continencie and such like , which though they bee often and earnestly asked , yet they are seldome or neuer granted vnto some men ; as appeareth in Pauls example , who being buffetted by Satan , saith of himselfe , For this thing I besought the Lord thrice , that it might depart from me ; but he said vnto me , My grace is sufficient for thee , 2. Cor. 12. 8. 9. CHAP. 4. Of the Contract . MArriage hath two distinct parts , the first is the beginning ; the second , the accomplishment or consummation thereof . The Beginning , is the Contract or Espousals ; the End or accomplishmēt , is the solemne Manifestation of the Contract , by that which properly we call Mariage . Deut. 20. 7. What man is there that hath betrothed a wife , and hath not taken her ? Let him go and returne againe vnto his house , lest he die in battell , and another man take her . Matth. 1. 18. When his mother Marie was betrothed to Ioseph , before they came together , She was found with child of the Holy Ghost . Betweene the Contract and Marriage , there ought to bee some certaine space or distance of time . The reasons whereof may be these : First , a businesse of so great importance as this is , would not be rashly or vnaduisedly attempted , but should rather be done by degrees in processe of time , according to that saying , not so ancient as true . * Actions of weight , before resolution , require mature deliberation , Secondly , That during such a space , inquirie may be made , whether there be any iust cause , which may hinder the consummation of Marriage : considering that before the parties come and conuerse together , what is amisse may be remedied and amended , which to do afterward will be too late . Thirdly , In these cases , persons espoused must haue regard of honestie , as well as of necessitie ; not presently vpon the Contract , seeking to satisfie their own fleshly desires , after the manner of bruit beasts , but proceeding therein vpon mature deliberation . The Contract is a mention or mutuall promise of future mariage , before fit and competent Iudges and Witnesses . The best manner of giuing this promise , is , to make it * in words touching the present time , and simplie without any exception or condition expressed or conceiued . For by this meanes it comes to passe , that the bond is made the surer , and the ground or foundation of future mariage the better laid . And hence alone it is , that the persons betrothed in Scripture are termed man and wife . Iacob speaking of Rahel , who was only betrothed vnto him , saith to Laban , Giue me my wife , Genes . 29. 21. Deut. 22. 23. If a maid bee betrothed to a husband , and a man find her in the towne , and lie with her , then shall yee bring them both out vnto the gates of the citie , and shall stone them with stones to death , the maid , because she cried not being in the citie , and the man , because hee hath humbled his neighbours wife . Matth. 1. 20. Ioseph feare not to take Mary thy wife . Now if the promise bee vttered in words , * for time to come , it doth not precisely bind the parties to performance . For example , if one of them saith to the other ; N. I will take thee , &c. and not , N. I do take thee , &c. by this forme of speech the match is not made , but only promised to bee made afterward . But if on the other side it be said , N. I do take thee , and not , I will take thee ; by these termes , the mariage at that very instant is begun , * not in regard of fact , yet in regard of right and intrest , which the parties haue each in another in deed and in truth . And this is the common opinion of the learned . Yet notwithstanding , if the parties contracting shall say each to other , I will take thee to , &c. with intention to bind themselues at the present ; the bond is in conscience precisely made before God , and so the Contract is indeed made * for the present time before God. True it is , that he which standeth to his promise made , as much as in him lieth , doth well : yet if the promise hath or conceiueth some iust cause , why hee should afterward change his purpose , the Contract expressed in termes for time to come , though it were formerly made , & confirmed by oath , must notwithstanding giue place to the Contract made for time present . Those espousals , which are made vpon condition , which is honest , possible , and belonging to Mariage , doe cease or depend : so far forth as the condition annexed ceaseth or dependeth . For example ; If the one partie promiseth to marry the other vpon cōdition , that his or her kinsman will yeeld consent to the match ; or vpon condition of a dowrie that shee shall bring vnto him , sutable to her education , and the familie whereof she commeth : these conditions being kept or not kept , the promise doth likewise stand , or not stand . But those conditions which are necessarily vnderstood , or which may certainly be kept and come to passe , do neither hinder nor suspend Marriage . As this : I promise thee mariage , if I liue ; or , I promise to marie thee , if the Sunne rise to morrow . Againe , conditions that are either impossible or dishonest , are not to bee accounted as promises annexed * in way of Marriage . Of which sort are these , I will be thy wife , if thou willt take vnto thee wings and flie , or , If thou wilt bring an vntimely birth . Furthermore , if the parties betrothed , do lie together before the condition ( though honest & appertaining to mariage ) be performed ; then the contract for time to come is , without further controuersie , sure and certaine . For where there hath been a carnall vse of each others bodie , it is alwaies presupposed , that a mutuall consent , as touching Mariage , hath gone before . CHAP. 5. Of the choise of persons fit for Marriage . FOr the making of a cōtract , two things are requisite : first the choice , & then the consent of the parties . Choice is an enquirie after persons mariageable . Persons mariageable , are such as be fit and able for the maried state . This fitnes or abilitie is knowne and discerned by certaine signes ; which are either essentiall to the contract , or accidentall . An essentiall signe is that , without which the contract in hand becomes a meere nullitie . And of this sort there are principally fiue . The first is the distinction of the sex , which is either male , or female . The male is man of a superiour sexe , fit for procreation . The female is woman of an inferiour sexe , fit to conceiue and beare children . 1. Cor. 11. 7. The man ought not to couer his head ; for as much as he is the Image and glorie of God ; but the woman is the glorie of the man. 1. Tim. 2. 12. I permit not the woman to teach , neither to vsurpe authoritie ouer the man , but to be in silence . By this distinction is condemned , that vnnatural and monstrous sin of vncleannes betweene parties of the same sexe , commonly termed Sodomie ; as also the confusion of the * kinds of creatures , when one kind commits filthinesse and abomination with another . The second signe , is , the iust & lawf●ll distance of blood . Distance of blood is then iust and lawfull , when neither of the persons that are to be married , do come neare to the kindred of their flesh , or to the flesh of their flesh , for so the Scripture speaketh , Leuit 18. 6. No man shall come neare to any of the flesh of his flesh : or to the * kindred of his flesh . Where it is to be obserued , that by a mans flesh is meant that substance which is of himselfe , or whereof himselfe consisteth . And by the flesh of his flesh , that which next and immediately issueth out of that flesh whereof he consisteth . Whereupon it followeth , that the touching or comming neare of flesh to flesh , is not spoken of strangers , but of those only that are of kindred . Kindred is of two sorts , consanguinitie , or affinitie . Kindred in consanguinitie , are those which issue from out , & the same common blood or stocke . And there be certaine degrees , whereby kinsmen of this sort are distinguished one from another . A degree is a generation or descent betweene two persons that are of the same blood . For one person cannot make a degree , vnlesse he be considered relatiuely in regard of generation . Now many degrees continued or deriued from one and the same head , do make a Line ; And a Line is twofold , the Right line , or the Ouerthwart , cōmonly termed collaterall . In the Right Line , looke how manie persons there are , so many degrees there be , that only excepted , which vpon occasion offered , is in question , and from which we begin the account . Abraham . Isaac . Iacob . Ioseph . Heere Ioseph is distant three degrees from Abraham , Iacob two , Isaac one , or the first . The Right line is either ascending or descending . The right line ascending , is the race of all the ancestors ; and it hath sundrie degrees . Of the first whereof is , the father and the mother ; of the second , the grand-father both by the father and mothers side , that is , the father of my father , and the father of my mother ; and the grand-mother , that is to say , my fathers and my mothers mother . Of the third , is , the great grand-father , or the father of my grand-father ; and the great grand-mother , or the mother of my grand-father . Of the fourth , is the great grand-fathers father , and the great grand-fathers , or grand-mothers mother . Of the fift , is the great grand-fathers grand-father , & the great grand-fathers , or great grand-mothers grand-mother . Of the sixt , is the great great grand-fathers grand-father ; & the great great grand-fathers , or great great grand-mothers grand-mother . The right line descending , is the race of a mans owne posteritie . And that also hath sundrie degrees . The first wherof is , the sonne and the daughter ; the second , the nephew , and the neece ; the third , the nephewes sonne , and the neeces daughter . The fourth is the nephewes nephew , or the sonne in the fourth degree of lineall descent , & the neeces neece , or the daughter in the same degree of descent . The fift is hee and she that are three lineall descents from the childs child . And so are the rest in their order , by what names soeuer they be called and knowne . Now in this right line , whether ascending or descending , the person , of whom the case or question is moued , commeth neere to the kindred of his flesh . And therefore mariages in this line are prohibited infinitly , without any limitation ; so as if Adam himselfe were now aliue , he could not marry by the law of God , because hee should come neare to the kindred of his owne flesh , as Moses speaketh . The reason hereof is , because in the right line , superiours and inferiours are to each other as parents and children ; and the kindred betweene parents & children , being the first and nearest of all other , their coniuction in marriage must needs bee most vncleane , and repugnant vnto nature . The collaterall or crooked line , is that , which walketh by the sides of the right line , whether ascending or descending , in the row of the kindred . And it is either vnequall or equall . The vnequall is that , whereby the person in question and his kinsman , are vnequally distant from the common stocke , or head of the kindred . And in this line , looke how many degrees the kinsman that is furthest off from the common stock , is distant from the same , so many is he and his kinsman in question distant one from the other . For example , Thare . Abraham — Nachor Bethuel Laban . Heere Laban being remoued furthest off , to wit , three degrees from the common stock Thare ; is likewise three degrees distant frō Abraham , his great vnckle , and Abraham so many from him . Furthermore , kinsmen in this Line are of two sorts ; some are Superiours to the person in question , some are Inferiours to him . Superiours are such , as are a kinne to his father , and mother , of some side ; and that either nearer , or further off . Those that are of neare kin to them , bee these . I. The vncle of the fathers side , or the fathers brother ; the aunt of the fathers side , or fathers sister . The vncle of the mothers side , or the mothers brother ; the aunt of the mothers side , or the mothers sister . II. The great vncle , or grand-fathers brother ; the great aunt , or grand-fathers sister . The great vncle , or grand-mothers brother , and the great aunt , or grand-mothers sister . III. The great vncle by the fathers side , or great grand-fathers brother ; and the great aunt by the fathers side , or great grand-fathers sister . The great vncle by the mothers side , or the great grand-mothers brother ; and the great aunt by the mothers side , or the great grand-mothers sister . IV. The great grand-vncle by the fathers side , or great grand-fathers fathers brother : and the great grand-aunt by the same side , or the great grand-fathers fathers sister . The great grand-vncle by the mothers side , or great grand-mothers mothers brother : and the great grand-aunt by the same side , or the great grād-mothers mothers sister . Now these in regard of their inferiours , are in stead of parents , and therefore do come neare to the kindred of their flesh . Those superiours which are of kindred to parents on the one side , a farre off , are these . I. The sonne and daughter of the great vncle or aunt by the fathers side ; or of the great vncle or aunt by the mothers side . II. The nephew and neece of the great vncle or aunt by the fathers side , or of the great vncle or aunt by the mothers side , neare to the cozin germane . And these as they stand in comparison with their inferiours , doe not come neare to the kindred of their flesh . The equall collaterall line , is that , whereby kinsmen are equally distant from their head . Kinsmen of this line , are , I. whole brothers , that is , brothers by the same father and mother , or halfe brothers , that is , brethren by the same father , but not by the same mother . Againe whole sisters by the same father or mother , or halfe sisters by one of them and not by both . II. The brothers children or cousin germans ; that is , the vncles sons or daughters , or the aunts sonnes or daughters . The sisters children , or cousin germans ; that is , the aunts sonnes or daughters , which are the children of two sisters . III. The cousin german , the son of the great vncle by the fathers or mothers side , and the cousin german the son of the great aunt , by the fathers or mothers side . The cousin-german the daughter of the great vncle , by the fathers or mothers side , and the cousin german , the daughter of the great aunt by the same sides . In this line , looke how many degrees the partie in question is remoued from the common stocke , by so many twice-told , is he remoued from his kinsman in question . Put the case betweene Bethuel and Isaac , as in this example . Thare Abraham — Isaac . Nachor Bethuel . Heere Bethuel being two degrees remoued from Thare , is foure degrees distant from Isaac . Now he that is in the second degree of this line , comes neare to the kindred of his flesh ; and for that cause the mariages of brethren , and sisters are vnlawfull , and forbidden . But against this , sundrie things are alledged . Obiect . 1. The sons of Adam , who were the first brethren in the world , married their sisters ; marriages therefore in this degree may seeme to bee lawfull . Answ. The case of those persons in those times , was a case of necessitie , which could not be auoided , and therupon was warranted by diuine dispensation . For God had giuen them his owne expresse commandement in this behalfe ; Beare fruits and multiplie , Gen. 1. 28. Besides that , there were then no other women in the world , by whom they might haue issue and posteritie , but only by their sisters . Whereupon it is manifest , that Gods will was , to permit them to take euen their sisters to their wiues . But now out of this speciall dispensation from God , such matching is vtterly vnlawfull , being an apparent breach of another expresse commandement giuen afterward by God himselfe , Leuit. 18. 9. 11. To this purpose saith Augustine in way of answere to the example propounded . The practise of those first times , then backed by vrgent ne-nessitie ; the more ancient it was , the more damnable it proued afterward , when it was restrained by Gods commandement . Obiect . 2. Sarah was Abrahams sister , and yet Abraham tooke her to wife . Gen. 20. 12. Yet in very deed she is my sister , for she is the daughter of my father , but not the daughter of my mother , and shee is my wife . Gen. 11. 29. Abraham and Nahor tooke them wiues , and the name of Abrahams wife was Sarah . Answ. Touching this instance , there are sundrie opinions . The Iewes doe grant thus much , that she was called by a name common to all kinsfolke of that sexe , to wit , a Sister ; yet indeed shee was Abrahams neece , the sister of Lot , and the daughter of Haran , Abrahams brother , which Moses elsewhere calleth Iischa , Genes . 11. 29. Others thinke , that shee was daughter in law to Thare , Abrahams father ; because Abraham himselfe saith , She is the daughter of my father , not of my mother . Others are of opinion , that she was Harans daughter in law , and after his death was translated into the family of Terah , her grand-father ; who was also in ste●d of her father being dead , and thence shee was termed his daughter Now howsoeuer in this varietie of iudgements , it is hard to find certaintie of truth , yet this is out of doubt , that God in those daies tolerated many things , which notwithstanding he did not altogether approue . Obiect . 3. 2. Sam. 13. 13. Thamar saies to her brother Amnon ; Speake I pray thee to the King , and he will not denie mee vnto thee . Ans. The speech of Thamar is not simplie to be taken , as if she desired that which she said , or as if it were lawfull to be done , which she wished him to do ; but only that she sought to put him off , by giuing him this counsell , in respect of her owne deliuerance from that present danger ; wherein shee was . Or at least it way be said , that she erroniously supposed it was lawfull for the King to grant such a sute , if it had bin made vnto him by her brother Amnon . Whether way soeuer this speech bee taken , there can no such thing bee gathered thence , as is pretended . Now out of the second degree of the equal collateral line , it should seeme that those who are ioyned one to another in mariage , do not touch the kindred of their flesh ; and therefore the law of God forbiddeth not cōsobrines or cousin-germans , that is , brothers and sisters children to marrie . Yea if examples be of force for this purpose , the Scripture approueth such mariages . For thus it is written , that Iacob married Rahel the daughter of Laban , his mothers brother , Genes . 28. 2. Againe , that Mahlah , Tirzah , and Hoglah , Milcah and Noah the daughters of Zelophehad , were married vnto their fathers brothers sonnes , Numb . 36. 11. And Othniel the sonne of Kenaz , the cousin of Caleb , tooke Kiriath-sepher ; and hee gaue him Acsah his daughter to wife , Ios. 15. 17. Howbeit in this case , the rule of the Apostle is to be followed ; That nothing be done , euen in things that are otherwise lawfull , whereby a mans brother may stumble , or bee offended , or made weake , Rom. 14. 21. Wherefore it is conuenient , that such mariages should not be , because sometimes they may giue offence in regard of the law of the Magistrate ; and because they come somewhat neare to the bonds and termes of blood and stocke , which God hath set downe in his word . Augustine in his 15. booke , De ciuitate Dei , chap. 16. saith to this purpose , Experti autem sumus , &c. that is , We haue found by experience , that in regard of that neerenesse of blood , which cousin-germans haue vnto the degrees of brothers and sisters , how rarely custome hath admitted those mariages , which were warrantable by lawes , because the law of God hath not forbidden them , nor as yet the law of man. Neuerthelesse the practise lawfull in it selfe , was forborne the rather , because it came neare to that which was vnlawfull , and therfore mariage with the cousin-german , seemed in a manner to be marriage with a mans own brother or sister , &c. Howbeit , there is no question , but in these times it hath been well prouided by lawes , that such mariages should not be vndertaken . For as the multiplication of alliance is hindered thereby , so this inconuenience also groweth from them , that friendship and loue which is procured by affinitie , betweene men that are strangers ; cannot be enlarged and encreased , where men goe not out of the limits , and termes of their owne blood ; Yea , there is naturally in man a commendable measure of shamefastnesse , whereby vpon consideration of nearenesse in blo●d , hee acknowledgeth a due debt of modestie and honor to his next kindred , and consequently estraineth himself in regard of them from he occasions and actions of concupiscence , whereunto hee is inclinable in respect of others . And hence it is , that generally the modestie that ought to be in those which intend mariage , auoideth as much as may be , these and such like coniunctions . The same is the iudgement of Ambrose in one of his Epistles to his friend Paternus , wherin he disswadeth him frō marrying his sonne with his cousin-g●rman , vpon the grounds before alledged by Augustine adding this withall , that though it were in it selfe lawfull , being no where forbidden by God , yet in sundrie respects being inexpedient , it ought not to bee done , according to the saying of the Apostle , All things are lawfull for me , but all things are not expedient . But it is auouched to the contrarie , that God by expresse law forbiddeth mariage with the aunt , the fathers sister Leuit. 18. 12. and with the mothers sister ▪ vers . 13. and with the fathers brother wife , which is also the aunt , vers . 14. therefore by the law of proportion , ● forbiddeth matching with the childr●● of these persons . For in nature it is a ruled case : If a man may not marrie th● mother , much lesse may he marrie the daughter . Answ. The argument is faultie , and concludes nothing to the purpose . For there is not the same reason of both . In the right line of consanguinitie , those which are sisters to father and mother , stand in the place and stead of parents ; and their nephewes and neeces are to them as children , therefore mariages among them can stand by no law , either of God , of nature , or by the positiue lawes of nations . It is not so with cousin germans . For hauing no such relation , there is not in their mariages , by the law of Moses , any discouerie of shame , or breach of ciuil honestie . The blessing of God vpon some of them mentioned in Scripture , as vpon Iacob and Rahel , and such like , doe euidently shew that they were lawfull in themselues , and pleasing vnto him . And thus much touching kindred by blood or consanguinitie . Kindred in affinitie , is that , whereby the termes of two kindreds , are brought into the societie of one and the same familie ; or whereby persons that are not of blood , are by marriage allied each to other . Hence it is termed affinitie , because it maketh an vnitie of termes in kindred , which before were distant . Affinity or alliance groweth by mixtion or participation of blood , in the coupling of man and wife together in lawfull mariage . For a bare and simple contract , maketh not alliance betweene partie and partie properly , but mariage after the contract finished and consummate . Againe , the same alliance ceaseth and determineth vpon the death of either partie espoused or maried ; yet so as the prohibition of coniunction remaines , and stands in force , for the preseruation of publike honestie . Now there is a kind of resemblance and proportion betweene kindred of blood , and kindred by mariage , not only in regard of degrees and line , but also in respect of the prohibition of degrees . Those that are of alliance , are commonly reduced to these heads . I. The father in law , or the husbands or wiues father . The mother in law , or the husbands or wiues mother . II. The mothers husband , or step father to them that come by another man. The fathers wife , or step-mother to those that come by another woman . III. The wiues fathers father , or grand-father , and the wiues mothers mother , or grand-mother ; or the grand-father and grand-mother of the wife . IV. The sonne in law , or daughters husband , and the daughter in law , or sons wife . V. The neeces husband , & the nephewes wife . VI. The step-son , or son in law , that is , the son of a man by another wife , or of a woman by another husband . The step-daughter , or daughter in law , that is , the daughter of a man by another wife , or of a woman by another husband . VII . The step-sons son , or his son who comes of a man by another woman , or of a woman by another mā . And the step-daughters daughter , or her daughter who comes of a man by another woman , or of the woman by another husband VIII . The husbāds or wiues brother , & the husbāds sister , or brothers wife . IX . The sisters husband , and the brothers wife . Concerning affinitie , I propound these rules . I. Looke in what degree a man is of consanguinity to ones wife , in the same degree of affinitie hee is to the wiues husbād . And cōtrariwise for example . Isaac Esau. Iacob . Ioseph — Ioseph Samuel Aaron . Eli. Maria. Leui. Heere , if Mar●e Iosephs wife , be distant from Esau Iosephs vncle by the fathers side , two degrees , then also is Ioseph himself distant from Aaron the brother of Eli his father in law , two degrees . If Marie the wife , be distant from her own father Eli one degree , and from her grand-father Samuel two ; then also is her husband distant from Eli his father in law , one degree , and from Samuel his wiues grand-father , two . Another example . Herod . Herod . Philip , whose wife is Herodias . Heere Herod being in the first degree of consanguinitie with his brother Philip ; Herodias his brothers wife is in the first degree of affinitie to him . II. Rule . Cousins by mariage within the degrees , both of the right and collaterall line , doe come neere to the kindred of their flesh , in the same manner that cousins by bloud doe , in the same lines ; and the like degrees in both are forbidden . Therefore in the right line of affinitie , it is as well vnlawful for the father in law to marrie the daughter in law , or the sonne in law to marry the mother in law ; as it is for the father to marrie the daughter , or the sonne the mother . Againe , in the collaterall , it is as vnlawful for the vncle by the mothers side , to marrie the wife of his sisters son , and so in other degrees , as it is for him to match in the same degrees of cōsanguinitie . The reason is , because in these lines , as well as in those of consanguinitie , superiours and inferiours , are each to other as parents and children . From hence amongst other things , it may bee gathered , that it is in no sort lawful for a man , when his wife is dead , to marrie her sister , Leuit. 18. 16. Thou shalt not discouer the shame of thy brothers wife ; for it is thy brothers shame . And Leuit . 20. 21. The man that taketh his brothers wife , committeth filthines , because he hath vncouered his brothers shame . Against this doctrine it is obiected . First , that God commandeth not to take a wife with her sister , during her life , Leuit. 18. 18. in which place , hee doth not simplie forbid a man to marry two sisters one after another , but to marrie them both together , and therefore after the wife is dead , a man may marrie her sister . Ans. The place is a flat prohibition of the sin of Polygamie . For to take a wife to her sister in the Hebrew phrase , is nothing else but to take two wiues one to another . The like forme of speech is vsed otherwhere by Moses , as Exo. 26. 3. Fiue curtaines shall bee coupled together , [ the woman to her sister ] that is , one to another ; and the other fiue curtaines shall be coupled [ the woman to her sister ] that is , the one to the other . Ezech. 1. 9. The foure beasts were ioyned with their wings , [ the woman to her sister ] that is , the one to the other . Againe , Moses himselfe there alledgeth two reasons against Polygamie : the one is , because the man is to loue , cherish and comfort this wife ; whereas , if he should take vnto him another besides her , he should greatly vex his first lawfull wife . The other , because by that meanes he should vncouer the shame of his wife ; that is , he should play a very dishonest part with her , to whom he was before lawfully married . Obiect . 2 The Lord commanded by a speciall law , that the brother , in case his brother died without issue , should take his wife , and raise vp seede vnto him , Deut. 25. 5. Answ. The words of Moses are a speciall exception of a generall law propounded in Leuit. 18. 16. Thou shalt not discouer the shame of thy brothers wife ; for it is thy brothers shame . And they are peculiarly directed to the Israelites , vpon speciall cause ; that , when the elder brother died without seed the name of the first borne might not be extinct , but the familie might bee preserued in that name , by raising vp of seed vnto him , which being a priuiledge proper to the Israelites , vpon that speciall consideration , it must not bee enlarged to any other sort of men whatsoeuer . Neither is the text to be vnderstood of cousins remoued only , as some thinke , but also of the next of the kindred by blood ; as appeareth plainly by the historie of Ruth , chap. I. vers . II. in these words of Naomi to her daughters in law , Turne againe , my daughters ; for what cause will you go with me ? Are there any moe sonnes in my wombe , that they may bee your husbands ? Turne againe , my daughters , go your way , for I am too old to haue a husband , &c. III. Rule . The wiues kinsman by blood , is of affinitie to her husband only ; but vnto his kindred by blood , the said kinsman hath no affinitie at all . So on the contrarie it is true , that though the husbands kinsman by blood , be allied to his wife , yet he hath no alliance to those that are kinsmen of blood vnto her . The reason is , because betweene the kindred of blood on the mans side , and the kindred of blood on the womans side , there is no affinitie . For the prohibition of the degrees of affinitie , hath force in those only which are the cause thereof , and goeth no further . Now the cause being only in the married persons themselues , the effect may not in reason be enlarged , to them that are of the same blood with either of them . From this rule it followeth , that the kindred of both married persons by blood , may lawfully match together . The sonne in law , may match with the daughter of his mother in law . The father and the son by another wife , may marrie the mother and the daughter . Two brothers may lawfully match with two sisters . IV. Rule . Kindred of affinitie to the wife , are also kindred of affinitie to her husband ; but how ? not properly , but only after a sort , and as it were , of affinitie . So on the contrarie . Kindred of alliance to the husband , are , as it were , of alliance to his wife . For example . The wife of my father in law , which is not my wiues owne mother , but her step-mother , is , as it were , my mother in law , for she is ( as it were ) of affinitie to me , because she is indeed of affinitie to my wife . Those which are of affinitie only after a sort , cannot conueniently match one with another . And therefore the sonne in law may not marrie with his wiues step-mother ; because being of affinitie to his wife , shee is in stead of a mother in law to him . Neither may the daughter in law match with her husbands step-father , because hee is ( as it were ) a step-father to her . Againe , my sisters husband may not marry my brothers wife ; for they are after a sort , brother and sister each to other . The reason hereof is , because the wife is holden in law a * part of her husband , and therfore if affinitie hinders mariage with one of the married couples , it hindreth as well in the like case and respect , mariage with the other . And thus much touching the distance of blood , which in the choice of persons fit for mariage , is most necessarily to be obserued . For in the 18. chapter of Leuiticus , there are sixteene seuerall sorts of persons with whom mariage is forbidden . The first is the mother . The second is the step-mother . The thid , the sister by the same father and mother . The fourth , the half-sister , by one of the parents only . The fifth is the neece by the sonne . The sixth , the neece by the daughter . The seuenth , the fathers sister . The eight , the vncles , that is , the fathers brothers wife . The ninth , the mothers sister . The tenth , the daughter in law , or sons wife . The eleuenth , the brothers wife . The twelfth , the wiues mother . The thirteenth , the step-daughter , or the wiues daughter by another husbād , or husbāds daughter by a former wife . The fourteenth , is the step-sonnes daughter , that is , his daughter who was the wiues sonne by another husbād . The fifteenth , the step-daughters daughter . The sixteenth , is the wiues sister . And not only these , but all other answerable to them , either in the same or like degree , are by equall proportion forbidden to be had in mariage . It is alledged , that the prohibitions mentioned in that chapter , are meerely Mosaicall , that is , Ceremoniall , and therefore doe not bind vs now in the new Testament . Answ. It is a flat vntruth ; as shall appeare by these reasons . First , the Cananites long before these lawes were giuen by Moses to the Israelites , were grieuously afflicted for the breach and contempt of the same , as may bee gathered by that which is written in the same chapter of Leuiticus , vers . 3. According to the workes of the land of Canaan , yee shall not do , neither walke in their ordinances . And vers . 24. You shall not defile your selues in any of these things : for in all these the nations are defiled , which I will cast out before you . vers . 25. And the land is defiled ; therefore I will visite the wickednes thereof vpon it , and the land shall vomit out her inhabitants . Secondly , the Prophets themselues after Moses , are wont to account these prohibitions not Ceremonial , but Morall . Ezech. 22. 10. In thee , haue they discouered their fathers shame ; in thee haue they vexed her , that was polluted in her flowers . Amos 2. 7. A man and his father will go in to a maid , to prophane the name of my holinesse . Thirdly , the same lawes are also vrged in the new Testament , wherin Legal Ceremonies were determined , and had their end . Mark. 6. 18. Iohn said to Herod , It is not lawfull for thee to haue thy brothers wife . 1. Cor. 5. 1. It is heard certainly , that there is Fornication among you , and such Fornication , as is not once named among the Gentiles , that one should haue his fathers wife . Fourthly , Nature it selfe by proper instinct , abhorreth such kind of coniunctions , & the prohibitions of them , haue sufficient ground , euen from her principles . For to this purpose it is , that not only the lawes of the Romane Emperours , but also the ciuill Canons and constitutions of men , very skilfull in that kind , haue in all ages expresly bin made against such persons , as haue offended in those societies forbidden by the law of Moses . Fiftly , The Lord himselfe hath denounced many and great punishments to be inflicted vpon the breach of the same lawes . Leuit. 20. 11. The man that lieth with his fathers wife , because hee hath vncouered his fathers shame , they shall both die ; their blood shal be vpon them . vers . 12. The man that lieth with his daughter in law , they both shall die the death ; they haue wrought abomination ; their blood shall bee vpon them . vers . 14. He that takes a wife and her mother , committeth wickednesse ; they shall burne him and them with fire . vers . 16. The man that taketh his sister , his fathers daughter , or his mothers daughter , and seeth her shame , and she seeth his shame ; it is villanie : therefore they shall be cut off in the sight of their people . vers . 20. The man that lieth with his fathers brothers wife , and vncouereth his vncles shame , they shall beare their iniquitie , & shall die childlesse . Deut. 23. 2. A bastard shall not enter into the congregation of the Lord , euen to his tenth generation . Deut. 27. 20. Cursed be he that lieth with his fathers wife . The third essential Signe of a person mariageable , is abilitie and fitnesse for procreation . And this in an holy and modest sort is alwaies supposed to bee in the partie contracted , vnlesse the cōtrarie be manifestly knowne , & discerned by some apparent infirmitie in the bodie . Hence I gather , that it is vnlawful to make a contract with such a person , as is vnfit for the vse of mariage , either by naturall constitution of bodie , or by accident . For example ; in regard of sicknesse , or of frigiditie , or of the palsie vncurable , or lastly of the depriuation of the parts belonging to generation . These and such like impediments are of force , though a contract should alreadie be made , yet to make it a meere nullitie , considering that God maketh knowne his will in them , that hee approoueth not of such espousals , but would haue them to be dissolued . Againe , that which is made betweene two persons that are * vnder age , is to bee holden and accounted as vnlawfull . And though it should be done by consent , or cōmandement of Parents , yet it is of no moment . This alwaies remembred ; except it bee ratified by a new consent of the parties after they be come to age ; or that they in the meane time haue had priuate and carnall copulation one with another . Againe , put the case two be espoused , whereof the one is vnder age , the other of full age ; the partie that is of full age , ought to tarrie and expect the time , wherein the issue of the espousals formerly made , may bee manifested . And the vnder-aged may not break off consent , either before , or when they be come to perfect yeares , but must rest in expectation of the accomplishment of the contract , when hee or she shall be out of their minoritie . The fourth essential Signe , is a sound and healthfull constitution of bodie , free from diseases incurablie contagious . Whereupon it followeth , that a promise of mariage made betweene those , whereof the one hath a disease so lothsome , as that the other vpon good ground cannot possiblie endure familiar societie and companie with him ; though it do not wholly hinder the vse of the bodie , is vtterly vnlawfull . Of this sort is the Leprosie , the Frēch poxe and such like . For seeing there cannot be any matrimonial vse of them that are tainted with such contagious diseases , without apparent danger of infecting each other , and those also , which haue societie with them , and others ; yea and by this meanes the issue of their bodies , growing of a corrupted seed , are euen borne to perpetual miserie , and to the great hurt and hinderance of the Common-wealth ; the case is plaine , that such mariages cannot be vndertaken with good conscience . Now if the one party haue a disease , though not contagious , yet either incurable , or so * lothsome , as the other hath iust cause to abhor his companie ; for example , if he be sicke of a Lethargie , of the falling sicknes , or such like diseases ; then , though it be lawfull to match with him , because such a contract is not expressely forbidden , neither is it apparantly hurtfull to the Cōmon-wealth , yet is it not expedient , because the disease being lothsome to the sound partie , the mariage also will become vnprofitable , and the partie in danger of breaking the commandemēt of the Morall law , wherein God forbiddeth to commit adulterie . The fifth essentiall Signe of a person mariageable , is freedome from mariage ; whereby both the parties which enter contract , are so at libertie , that neither the man hath in present another wife , or is promised to another ; nor the woman hath another husband , or is promised to another . The reason is , because God himselfe esteemeth that mariage only lawfull , wherein one man is ioyned to one woman , and they both into one flesh ; & consequently iudgeth it vnlawfull , as for one man to haue more wiues ; so for one woman at the same time to haue more husbands . Hence it followeth , that it is against the law of God , and the first institution of mariage , that a contract should bee made betweene such persons , whereof the one is formerly betrothed to another . For so long as the first promise stands in force , the man can no more be betrothed to two women , then he may be the husband of two wiues ; because the spouse by the bond of her promise to the man , becomes a wife ; and the man by the bond of his promise to the woman , becomes an husband , Deut. 22. 23. 24. Againe , there can bee no sure-making , and consequently no mariage with such a one , as either hath been diuorced without a sufficient cause , or hath wrongfully forsaken and reiected a lawfull mate before . To this purpose saith our Sauiour Christ , Matth. 19. 9. I say vnto you , that whosoeuer shall put away his wife , except it be for whoredome , & marieth another , committeth adulterie ; and whosoeuer marrieth her which is diuorced , committeth adulterie . And Saint Paul , 1. Cor. 7. 11. But & if she depart , let her remaine vnmarried , or be reconciled vnto her husband , and let not the husband put away his wife . Hitherto I haue treated of essentiall markes , which belong to the being of mariage . Now I come to those that are accidentall . An accidentall marke of a person fit for mariage , is that , which belongeth not to the being , but to the well being , that is , to the holines and puritie of that estate . And of this sort , there be three that are the principall . The first is paritie or equality , in regard of Christian religion ; For in mariage , there is a speciall care to be had , that belieuers be matched with belieuers , and Christians with Christians ; not belieuers with Infidels , or Christians with Pagans . For the former sort are only and alwaies to be made and kept , and the latter to be auoided , yea inhibited by positiue lawes and constitutions , the breach whereof in such cases is seuerely to be punished . The neglect of this point was one principall cause of the destructiō of the old world by the floud . Gen. 6. 2. The sons of God saw the daughters of men , that they were faire , and they tooke them wiues of all that they liked . Abraham obserued it in the mariage of Isaac his sonne , and for that purpose tooke an oath of his seruant . Gen. 24. 3. I will make thee sweare by the Lord God of heauen , and God of the earth , that thou shalt not take a wife vnto my son , of the daughters of the Cananites among whom I dwell . And in imitation of that holy example , Isaac also giues a charge vnto Iacob his son , that he should not take a wife of the daughters of Canaan , Gen. 28. 1. Afterward there was an expresse law of God giuen by Moses , touching the Gentiles that liued in that land . Exod. 34. 15. Beware that thou make not a couenant with the inhabitants of the land , &c. vers . 16. And take of their daughters vnto thy sonnes , and their daughters go a whoring after their gods ; and make thy sonnes goe a whoring after their gods . And the same law was vrged by Ezra the Priest in his time . Ezra 10. 11. Separate your selues from the people of the land , and from the strange wiues . Lastly , S. Paul exhorteth the Corinthiās , 2. Cor. 6. 14. Be not vnequally yoked with the Infidels . And Titus 3. 10. Reiect him that is an heretike , after once or twice admonition . But suppose it falleth out , that the espousals be past , and that both parties at the first were belieuers , or one of thē only ; or that at first both were vnbelieuers , and yet afterward one of them is conuerted to the faith ; or further , admit that both were belieuers at the contract , yet within some time after , the one becomes an Infidell , that is to say , a Iew , a Turke , or an obstinate Heretike , that denies the faith , and razeth euen the very foundation of Religion ; in this case what is to be done ? Surely euē such espousals once made and ended , if there be no other impediments but these , are to stand & continue firme and vnchangeable ; so long as the vnbelieuing partie doth willingly yeeld , and submit him or her selfe to the performance of mariage duties , properly belonging to man and wife . My reason is , the speech of Paul , who saith ; If any brother haue a wife , that beleeueth not , if she be content to dwell with him , let him not forsake her . Againe , The woman which hath an husband that belieueth not , if he be content to dwell with her , let her not forsake him , 1. Cor. 7. 12. 13. If it be heere alledged , that the sin of adulterie dissolues the bond both of contract and mariage , and therefore much more doth idolatrie or infidelity , which is a sinne farre more detestable then adulterie : I answere , that the questiō is not , whether of these is the greater sin , or more hainous in the sight of God ; for Infidelitie in both respects far exceedeth the other ; but whether of them is more repugnant to the nature and condition of wedlocke . Now the sinne of adulterie is that alone , which breakes the bond , and renounceth the troth plighted in mariage , and is the proper cause of a diuorce , and not Idolatrie or Infidelitie . The second note , is parity or equalitie in regard of age and condition . First of Age ; because though the mariage of persons , whose yeares are farre vnequall , is not expresly forbidden in the word ; yet is it agreeable to the rules of expediencie and decencie , that the aged should match with the aged , the yonger with the yonger . Reasons are these . First , because the comforts of this societie in likelihood will by this meanes alwaies be equall , and consequently bring the more contentment to either partie . Secondly , these vnequall mariages are often times offensiue to others . Thirdly , they cannot but in some cases proue offensiue euen to themselues . For when a man of great yeares matcheth with a woman very yong , or a yong stripling marrieth an aged woman ; the elder partie growing weake and impotent , may the sooner come to be vnfit for mariage duties ; and the yonger being of greater strēgth and abilitie , , the more in danger of being exposed to incontinencie , and that in the highest degree , vnlesse he be restrained by Gods speciall grace . For this cause it was a great fault , wherewith one Apuleius was iustly charged , that being but a very yong man , he was married to a wife of 60. yeares of age . Secondly , of condition and estate . For this also is answerable vnto the Apostles rule , who exhorteth men to thinke of , and to do those things which are true , iust , commendable , and of good report , Philip. 4. 8. Thus it is a seemely and commendable practise , that , the Prince , the Noble man , the free-man , the gentleman , the yeoman , &c. should be ioyned in societie with them , that are of the same or like condition with themselues , and not otherwise . For this cause are the auncient Romans greatly to be commended , who ( as we reade in their stories ) had such a carefull respect of their mariages in this behalfe , that they made lawes and constitutions for the restraining of inequalitie of worldly estate in such societies , by this meanes preuenting much confusion and disturbance in families , and other orders of men . Whereunto agrees that of Tertullian , who saith , That if a free woman had affianced her selfe to him that was a bond-man to another , and being thrice admonished thereof , by him that had authoritie ouer her , did notwithstanding perseuere in her purpose ; she should , according to the law , lose her freedome . The third note is publike honestie and credit , whereby the contract made becomes a matter of good report , well thought and spoken of abroad . Whatsoeuer things are of good report , thinke on them . Philip. 4. 8. From hence I gather , I. That it is an vnseemely thing for a mā to make promise of mariage to such a woman , as hath bin formerly deflowred , or hath and is , or may beconuinced of adulterie & vncleannes . Nay I adde further , that a cōtract made with such a one , as himself hath before deflowred , is by the law of God vnlawfull . For the adulterer and the adulteresse , by diuine law should be put to death , and be cut off from humane societie , Leuit. 20. 10. II. It is altogether inexpedient , that a woman should be married to such a man , as hath a Concubine , vnlesse hee formerly renounce her , and testifie the same by true and vnfeined repentance . The reason is plaine . Such a mariage cannot be vndertaken in the Lord. And the partie himselfe , being before polluted with his Concubine , becomes now by mariage to another , an adulterer ; and she that is maried vnto him , by this her act yeelds consent vnto his adulterie . III. That no man professing Christian religion , much lesse a Minister of the word , ought to take to himselfe in mariage a harlot , a defamed woman , or one that comes of infamous parents , though she be repentant . Leuit. 21. 7. The Priest shall not take to wife one that is a whore , or prophaned , that is to say , which hath an euill name , or comes of ignominious parents . Which law , though it was in part Ceremonial and Leuitical , and so far forth abrogate ; yet hauing in it some Moralitie , in as much as the reason therof ( to wit , because it is reprochfull to a Christian , but specially to a Minister ) is still in force , it is to be holden perpetuall . For Christian profession , and the Ecclesiasticall Ministrie is principally to be respected , and whatsoeuer may preiudice the dignitie and credit thereof , to be auoided . Obiect . 1. The Prophet Hosea was commanded to take vnto him a wife of fornication , that is , an harlot , Hosea 1. 2. Answ. Hosea did it not in deed , but in type and resemblance . For God commanded him in his prophecie , to take vpon him ( as it were ) the person of a fornicator , that by this meanes hee might the more effectually charge and cōuince the Israelites of their vncleane and vnchast conuersation . Obiect . 2. The Lord also forbiddeth the Priest to marrie a widow , Leuit. 21. 14. it may seeme therefore vnexpedient for a Minister so to do . Answ. The law concerning the mariage of a virgin , and not a widow , was not enioyned to all Priests , but only to the chiefe Priest , Leuit . 21. 10. And hee also might marrie a widow , but such a one only , as had bin the widow of a Priest , and not any other , Ezech. 44. 22. Now this was commanded them vpon speciall consideration . For the High Priest was a type of Christ , and Christ was in time to come to call his Church , the elect , among the Gentiles , and to marrie them as a virgin espoused vnto himselfe . Yea he was also to marrie his Church as a widow , but the widow of a Priest only , because he was to gather to himselfe the remnant of the Church of the Iewes ; howbeit not all of them , but such only as came of the holy Fathers , and were Israelites , not according to the flesh , but according to the promise . IV. That it is not meete for a man to be contracted to the sister of her that is alreadie affianced vnto him . And so much of the first point , required to the making of a contract , namely , the choice of a person fit for mariage . CHAP. 6. Of consent in the Contract . THe second thing required to the making of a contract , is the free and full consent of the parties , which is indeed the very soule and life of the contract . And this consent standeth in the approbation , or ( as wee commonly call it ) the Sure-making of the parties contracted . Consent in this case is twofold , either of the man and the woman , or of their parents . Touching the first ; That the man and the woman may yeeld free consent each to other , it is necessarie that , in respect of vnderstanding , their iudgemēt should be sound ; and in regard of will , their choice should be free . And here sundrie cases are to be resolued . I. Case . When the contract flowes not from the wil and good liking of the parties , but is forced and compelled , what is then to be done ? Ans. If the espousals haue bin made through force , or feare ; I meane , such as may befall a constant , and resolute man , and which hath bin wrought , vpon good knowledge , and cōsideration ; then are they of no moment , & in truth meere nullities ; because there is wanting to them the free and voluntarie accord , and assent of both parties . Neuerthelesse , if afterward they shall grow to a new consent , or both yeeld to an after-acceptation of that which was formerly made , the espousals shall then stand in force ; without further exception , or contradiction . II. Case . But how if consent bee past , and in processe of time it appeares to the espoused persons , that they haue erred , either in choice , or consent , or both ? Answ. There is a three-fold error in consent ; the one of the person , the other of the abilitie , or estate of the person ; the third of the qualitie . Error in respect of the person , is , whē one person is taken for another ; or whē the contract is made betweene two , whereof the one was taken to be such a partie , as afterwards he proued not to be . Now where this error is committed , it is a plaine case , there was no consent ; and therefore the contract , vpon certaine knowledge therof , is quite frustrate . For the knowledge of the partie is the ground of consent , and belongs consequently to the very substance of mariage . Neuerthelesse , if , the error being once knowne , the parties haue had secret societie one with another ; & haue either againe consented , or growen to an after-acceptation of the consent before made , the contract may and doth stand in full force . For example : Iacob , by the deceit of Laban , had taken Leah for Rachel , to his wife ; so saith the text , When the euening was come , Laban tooke Leah his daughter , and brought her to him , and he went in vnto her , Gen. 29 ▪ 23. But when the morning was come , behold it was Leah , 25. Now by the iudgement of the best Diuines , Iacob might iustly haue renounced Leah , if he would , because Laban had giuen her vnto him for Rachel , and so deceiued him ; yet hee would not vse extremitie , but kept her as his wife . If it be said , there was an error in the person , therefore no consent , and so Leah was not his lawfull wife , but Rachel . I answere , that Iacob did renue his cōsent afterward , & that renued cōsent following vpon their knowing one of another , made her his wife , though in extremity & rigor she was not . Againe , Rachel was indeed the partie to whom he was espoused , by the former cōtract ; and therfore , vpon their mutuall agreement afterward , she also became his wife . So saith the holy Ghost , vers . 27. Fulfill seuen yeares for her , and we will also giue thee Rachel for thy seruice , &c. v. 28. Then Iacob did so , and Laban gaue him Rachel his daughter to be his wife . Error of the ability or estate is , when one of the parties to whom cōsent was giuen by the other , being taken for rich and wealthie , in the issue proues to haue been very poore , and not sufficient to maintaine that state of life . Touching this error , it is to be considered , whether the cōtract was made absolute , for the time present , & so for euer afterward , or conditional for time to come only . If it were absolute , that is , conceiued in termes of the present time , then though the deceit bee verie offensiue to the partie deluded , and vpon his complaint ought in equitie to be punished by the Magistrate ; yet it is not of force to breake off the contract ; because the abilitie of either or both parties belongs not to the essence of mariage . But if it were for time to come and conditionate , then he or she that made promise vpon this condition , is free and not bound in conscience to fulfill the promise ; vnlesse the condition expressed aforehand be kept , and performed . Error of the qualitie of the person , is , when she which was in the espousals taken to bee a virgin , is afterward found to be with child by another , before they come together . By this error the Couenant is made void , and becomes a meere nullitie ; so as the man cannot be compelled , vpon true and certaine knowledge thereof , to marrie the woman ; but may renounce her , vnlesse both parties come to a new agreement , or haue priuately knowne each other vpon mutuall consent . For first , God did in expresse tearmes command the Iewes , that such a woman should be stoned to death : Deut. 22. 20. If the maid ( that was giuen to wife ) be not found a virgin , vers . 21. then shall they bring the maid to the doore of her fathers house , and the men of her citie shal stone her with stones to death , because she hath wrought folly in Israel , by playing the whore in her fathers house . Therefore it was not the will of God , that she should be retained as a wife , but vtterly reiected and forsaken . Againe , this was so vsual a practise in Israel vpon Gods commandement , that godly and righteous men , vpon the discouerie of this error , would not in conscience be perswaded , to marry thē to whom they had been betrothed , Matth. 1. 18. Ioseph her husband ( hauing found , before Marie and he came together , that she was with child ) being a iust man , and not willing to make her a publike example , was minded to put her away secretly . III. Case . What shall we thinke of the espousals of such , as are furious , and franticke ? Answ. We must distinguish of these diseases . For Madnes is , either perpetuall , or by fits only with intermission . If it be perpetuall , the case is cleere , that whether one of the parties only , or both be franticke , the contract made betweene them , is altogether vnprofitable & vaine . For such know not what they do whē they make a promise , and the consent which passeth betwixt thē cannot be free , full and perfect , but must needs be hindred and preiudiced by the heate and violence of their disease . Now although perpetuall madnesse be a iust impediment of mariage , and a sufficient cause to dissolue a contract , yet it is meet that there be a conuenient space of time agreed vpon , wherein all meanes may be vsed for the curing of this disease , to the end that Gods wil touching their amendment may be the more euidently knowne ; and both the parties themselues , and their friends may giue testimonie to the world , that they haue had a carefull respect of the contract before made . Againe , if it be not continuall , but by * fits , so as they haue some good daies , and quiet intermissiō , the case is otherwise . For the contract shall be ratified , and stand in force : prouided , that it was manifestly knowne , that the said parties were both in their right wits , before they plight their troth each to other ; and themselues be willing afterwards to confirme their promise forme●ly made , by renuing their consent . Consent of the Parents , is that act whereby they giue their word and promise , to bestow their children in mariage , and in regard of right , doe indeed presently bestow them . Therefore priuate contracts , that are made without free and lawfull consent of parents , are not only vnprofitable and vnlawfull , but euen by the law of God meere nullities . Reasons . I. They are contrarie to the expresse will and commandement of God : Exod. 20. Honor thy father and thy mother . II. They are flat repugnant to naturall equitie ; which teacheth , that he who hath not power , nor right ouer himselfe , cannot bind himselfe by promise to another . Now children haue not power ouer themselues , but are vnder the gouernment , & at the disposition of their Parents ; therefore the couenants which they make , are not made and appointed of God , and those which God maketh not , are in deed and truth none at all . CHAP. 7. Of Reiection , or Refusall of the Contract . COntrary to a complete and lawful cōtract , is Reiection , wherby the Contract is dissolued , or broken off . A lawfull Contract is then dissolued , when some great and hainous fault followeth immediately vpō it , in either of the parties espoused . And from hēce arise diuers and sundrie cases to be set downe and resolued . The first is this . What is to be done , when some disease befals one of the parties immediately after the contract made ? Answ. Those diseases which take away the vse of the bodie , and altogether disable the partie from the performance of the promise made , in respect of mariage duties , are very iust impediments of mariage , and consequently do break off the Contract . Of which sort are vncurable palsies , frigiditie , and such like , whereof I haue spoken before . Neuerthelesse a couenāt once made , is not suddenly to bee renounced , for feare of breeding offence . And therefore some longer respite is to be taken from the time of the contract , in which they are to rest in expectation of amēdment , before the said diseases be publikely and solemnely declared to be incurable , and consequently that the couenant made is become void . Now , if the disease do not for the present take away the vse of the body , and yet in time proues incurablie contagious , and so lothsome , that the one may iustly feare to keepe and conuerse with the other ; as it falleth out when one is tainted with leprosie ; then the contract is vtterly to be dissolued , as if God himself should haue commanded it , though the promise was formerlie made , & the parties themselues should be vnwilling . God hath ordained Matrimonie to helpe , not to hurt either the persons themselues , or others . Where therefore these diseases be , which may infect , hurt , or destroy others , there God hath , as it were , testified from heauen , that the act done is not pleasing vnto him , and that presently it ought to be frustrate . The contract being thus once dissolued , the sounder partie shall be at his , or her libertie to marrie againe . But the diseased is by the Magistrates authoritie , to be forbidden societie with any other in way of mariage , and commanded to lead his life , where he may conueniently from companie , for feare of infection . And withal he is for his owne part , to sue vnto God by prayer in faith for the gift of continencie . For certaine it is , that he to whom God hath denied the power of vsing mariage with good conscience , is thereby euen called to continencie and single life . But if the disease be not contagious , yet either incurable , or so nastie , that either of the espoused hath iust cause to be afraid of the others companie ; then both are to be aduised , not to claime their right , but willingly to surrender it each to other by mutuall consent , that they may be free againe , & not bound by any former promise to liue together as man and wife . Considering that they haue no hope mutually to conuerse together , with comfort & contentment , while they so remaine . Vpon this aduice giuen by their lawfull Pastor , or some in his stead ; if they both yeeld , or one of them at the least desires to be at his owne libertie , the espousals are forthwith to be brokē off . But if neither will consent to a separation , but rather proceed as they haue begun , and in probability the one haue no iust cause to hold the other in suspition , in respect of contagion ; they are not to be hindered from the consummation of their mariage . Furthermore , though one of them should haue a disease , which is continuall without intermission , & yet curable , or any other incōuenience should befall either of them , after the sure-making , wherby they become lame , deafe , or dumbe , &c. yet this is not a sufficient cause to moue them to renounce , and dissolue the contract . A second Case . What if it falleth out , that after the finishing of the contract , one of the espoused persons bee long absent from the other , so as the absence bee preiudiciall to the mariage , that should ensue vpon the contract ? Answ. Inquirie must be made , whether this absence be voluntarie , or against the will of the partie . If it be voluntarie . For example ; if the man vpon an honest and iust cause , the woman also being priuie thereunto , shall go beyond seas , and being admonished of his dutie before hand , shal notwithstanding stay a whole yeare or more , and will not returne , but further wilfully absent himselfe ; then may it be lawfull to the woman , to craue of the publike Magistrate a dissolution of the couenant made , & consequently marry another man , vnlesse the former , to whom she was contracted , be heard of . If he be , then shall it be lawfull for him to pleade for himselfe , and tendring no iust cause of his refusall , he shall be forced by the Magistrates authoritie to stand to his promise , and take the woman for his wife . And the same order is to be taken in the wilfull absence of the woman , after she is contracted . If againe , the man or woman shall vpon an euill mind , and with purpose to deceiue each other , absent thēselues , and depart ; meanes must be vsed , that they may be admonished of their dutie . That being done , or at least vndertaken , and yet the partie offending will not appeare , if the other that is present , vpon certaine knowledge of his , or her want in respect of continencie , shall sue to the Magistrate ; after publike and solemne notice giuen , the contract may be broken . But if on the other side , either of them be absent against their wil , and intendeth no fraud or deceit , but is violently detained , by captiuitie , imprisonment , sicknes , force , banishment , transportation or such like ; then the partie present being desirous of the consummation of the mariage , ought either to make meanes vnto him , and expect his returne , or haue certaine notice of his death , before she promise , or haue to do with any other in way of mariage . A third Case . What if after the contract , one of the parties becomes furious , or madde ? Answ. If the disease be continuall , without intermission , in all equitie and likelihood , the espousals are to be dissolued , vnlesse both parties after knowledge and experience of the disease , haue knowne one another : yet in this , and all such like cases , it is fit that all good meanes be tried and vsed , and sufficient time be giuen for the restoring of the diseased , to their former good estate , and for the accomplishment of the mariage lawfully begun , as before . CHAP. 8. Of Mariage . MAriage is that , wherby the coniunction formerly begunne in the contract , is solemnely manifested , and brought to perfection . Mariage is consummate by three sorts of actions ; one of the parents of the Bride and Bridegroome , the other of the Minister in publike , the third of the persons coupled together . The action of the Parents is vpon the Mariage-day , to bring the Bride , and deliuer her to the Bride-groome , that they two may become actually man and wife , and performe each to other all matrimoniall duties . And where the mariage is complete , in any other manner , so as the Parents vpon sound iudgement and deliberation , shall deny their full and free consent , either in expresse words , or by cōniuence and silence , and that vpon iust and lawfull cause ; there , though in the ciuill courts of men , it may stand , and the children borne therein bee legitimate before men , yet the truth is , before God it is of no force , but a meere nullitie . And because this doctrine , touching consent of parents in these Cases , is of great vse , and auaileth much to the supporting and mai●●●ining of families ; I will first open the truth thereof , and then proue it by reasons . Vnder the name of parents are comprehended ; First , the Father and Mother . Secondly , all Tutors and Guardians , who haue the proper & sole charge of wards , or others vnder yeares of discretion . Thirdly , all such as are kindred of blood , who are in stead of parents to childrē , as the vncle by the fathers side , the vncle by the mothers side , and such like . Now touching the consent of parents , that is , of father and mother , I hold it requisite of necessitie to marriage : For the authoritie of parents must not be resisted , or violated . As for Tutors , and such as haue the place of parents , their consent is not required of necessitie , but * of honestie at least , because the power and authoritie of the parent , though it be not taken away , yet it is lessened , when it is either transferred to another person , or in part resteth in the child alreadie bestowed . Secondly , by parents consent , I vnderstand that which they giue , not rashly , vnaduisedlie , or foolishlie , but out of good & wise consideration , and vpon true and sound iudgement , of the businesse in hand : For otherwise , as much as in them lieth , they make the mariage void and of none effect . And they are then thought to carrie a right iudgement of the thing , when they be able to yeeld a iust cause of yeelding , or denying their consent . For example ; if a father denies to bestow his daughter Iulia vpon Sempronius , because hee knowes him to be an Arrian , a Pelagian , or of any other sort of Heretikes ; he withholdeth his consent vpon a good ground , & he doth that which he doth , of iudgement . Yet further I adde , that where the parents do dissent , and can yeeld no probable cause thereof ; the mariage consummate without their consent , ought to be confirmed and ratified by the authoritie of the Magistrate , who is Pater patriae . And this seemes to be the most equall course , both for the auoiding of greater scandals , & for the preuenting of wrong , that may otherwise be done in some particular case , as to a woman that is defloured and reiected . Thirdly , consent of parents is either expressed , or implied ; Expressed , when it is giuen by words ; Implied , when it is yeelded by silence . For it standeth with most equitie and indifferencie , to thinke that those parents do giue consent , who do not by word expresly denie the same . Fourthly , children are either subiect to the authoritie of their parents in the familie ; or at their owne libertie , & out of their parents subiection . Those that are at liberty , are tied necessarily to subiection in respect of mariage ; but the other being still of the familie , and vnder iurisdiction , are bound to be ordered , by their parents in the bestowing of themselues . This is briefly the meaning of the question in hand . Now , for proofe of this point , I will propound three sorts of arguments , wherof some are drawne from the law of God , some from the light of nature , and some from the iudgement of the ancient Church . For the first sort . According to the law of God , mariage is not only a ciuill and politike , but also a diuine and spirituall coniunction , the author and ordainer whereof , vpon speciall cause , was God himselfe : This our Sauiour Christ witnesseth , when he saith , Those whom God hath ioyned together , let no man separate , Matth. 19. 6. That therefore mariages may be soundly ratified and confirmed , the authoritie and power of God himselfe is necessarily to be interposed . If it be asked , How God that is in heauen , should bring and ioyne together man and wife vpon the earth ? I answere , that he doth it not immediately by himselfe , as he brought Euah vnto Adam , but in & by some solemne and lawful meanes . And this meane , is that great and ancient power and prerogatiue of parēts . And the law of God hath giuen them this power , not in ciuill contracts and compositions alone , but euen in the beginning and accomplishing of mariages . Deut. 7. 3. Thou shalt not giue thy daughter vnto his sonne , nor take his daughter vnto thy son . Ierem. 29. 6. Take wiues for your sonnes , and giue your daughters vnto husbands , that they may beare sonnes and daughters . 1. Cor. 7. 36. But if any man thinke that it is vncomlie for his virgin , if shee passe the flower of her age , and need so require , let him doe what he will , he sinneth not , let them be maried . Hence it was , that Abraham by right of this authoritie , gaue order what wife his seruant should prouide for his son ; Thou shalt not take a wife to my sonne of the daughters of the Canaanites ; But thou shalt go vnto my countrie , and to my kindred , and take a wife vnto my sonne Isaac , Gen. 24. 3. 4. Sampson , though he was inflamed with the loue of the womā in Timnath , whom he saw to be beautifull in his eyes , yet hee durst not take her to his wife , till she was giuen him of his parents , Iudg. 14. It was an expresse law of God , that if a man intised a maid that was not betrothed , and lay with her , hee should endow her , and take her to his wife : But how ? marke in what manner the holy Ghost proceedeth , If her father refuse to giue her to him , he shall pay money according to the dowrie of virgins , Exod. 22. 16. 17. Deut. 22. 28. 29. In which text , Moses plainly teacheth , that the consent of the two parties is not sufficient , no not though they haue had societie together , vnlesse they haue the free cōsent of their parents also . In like maner it was ordained by God , Numb . 30. 4. 5. 6. That if a woman vowed a vow vnto the Lord , being in her fathers house , & her father hearing it , holdeth his peace concerning her , that is , approueth her vow by winking at it , her vow shall stand . But if her father disallow her , that is , giueth no approbation or consent vnto the vow made , it shall be of no value , and the Lord wil forgiue her , because her father consented not . Now , if the vow of children made vnto God , and pertaining to his worship , cannot be ratified without the parents approbation ; of how much lesse force shall any priuate contract or mariage be , without their allowance ? The second argument is taken from the light of nature , and it is gathered by proportion on this manner : A son priuilie alienateth and selleth away his fathers lands , either in whole or in part . The question is , whether this alienation be good in law , yea or no ? Answere is , No. And why ? Because the land did not belong to the son , but was part of his fathers substance . In like manner , a son alienates himselfe , and is betrothed to a woman , to marrie her without his parents knowledge : Is this act of the son warrantable and sound ? By no meanes ; for the son in respect of his body , is part of the fathers goods , and may not be alienated from him without consent . A notable reason hereof we find in Iob 1. For when God had giuen Satan power to destroy and spoile all Iobs goods , and whatsoeuer he had , the diuell doth not only touch the wealth of Iob , but his children also , as a part of his substance . In this respect the Iewes were permitted by God to sell their children . Exodus 21. 7. Againe , for the accomplishment of mariage , there must needs be a mutuall donation , betweene the spouse and the espoused . And what is that which is mutually giuen ? Surely their persons , or rather their bodies each to other , for so Paul saith , 1. Cor. 7. 2. Let euery man haue his wife , and let euery woman haue her owne husband . But by whom is this donation to be made ? by sons and daughters that are in the familie , vnder the iurisdiction of their parents ? It may not be ; For nature her selfe taketh it for granted , that he which is not at his own libertie , cannot yeeld to the giuing of himselfe . The donation therefore remaines in the right of the parent , in as much as the wil & consent of the child , ought to depend vpon his wil and consent , to whom God hath giuen power and authoritie in this behalfe . In the third place , let the iudgement of the ancient Church be obserued . Ambrose , in his first booke of the Patriarch Abraham , chap. 9. requires this consent in mariages , which he saith is so equall and agreeable to nature , that euē the Poets acknowledged the same . For which purpose he reciteth two verses out of the Grecian Poet Euripides , in his Tragedie called Andromacha , wherin in when Orestes desired to marrie Hermion , she frames him this answere , That the matter of her mariage wholly depended vpon the pleasure and authoritie of her father , & was not in her owne power or libertie . Innocentius , who was both a Pope and Martyr , in his decretall epistles , so strictly requireth consent of parents , as where it is wanting , he concludes the mariage to be void . In the Coūcell of Lateran , it was decreed that Clandestine contracts & secret mariages , made and vndertaken betweene partie and partie , should be holden as vnlawfull as mariages in those degrees of consanguinitie and affinitie , which are forbidden by God. Tertullian saith , That in this world the sonne cannot * rightly and lawfully marrie without the allowance of his father . Basil in an Epistle to Amphilochius Bishop of Iconium , affirmeth ; That mariages which are made without them which haue power ouer the parties , are fornications , and therefore that they which are ioyned together in mariage , while their parents or masters liue , are in no sort free from imputation of sin , vntill they haue approbation from them , for then mariage is ratified & confirmed , when they haue yeelded allowance thereunto . The second Action touching the consummation of mariage , is the action of the Minister . And that is the blessing or sanctification thereof , which is a solemne worke , wherby the Minister pronouncing the parties contracted to be man and wife before the whole congregation , commendeth them and their estate vnto God by solemne prayer . This solemne sanctification is grounded vpon the practise of God himselfe , who hauing giuen Euah to Adam , blessed them , saying , Increase and multiplie , Gen. 2. 22. and 1. 27. For that which God then gaue , the Minister standing in his roome , now prayeth may be giuen to the man and wife . Yea it is agreeable to the generall rule of the Apostle , Let all things bee done decently and in order , 1. Cor. 14. 40. Now that this action is to be approued and vsed in the Church , appeares by these reasons . I. Mariage as it is a publike action , so it is after a sort a spirituall and diuine ordinance , whereby it differeth from the contract : For the contract being meerely ciuill , as it standeth by consent of men , so by the same consent , it may bee broken and dissolued , but with mariage it is otherwise . II. Marriage is the Seminarie of the Church and Common-wealth . III. It was the practise of y e Primitiue Church . Tertullian speaking of the marriage of Christians with Christians , acknowledgeth himselfe not to bee able sufficiently to declare the happines of that coniunction which is made by the Church , consecrated by prayers & * solemne seruice , witnessed by the Angels , and ratified by God himselfe . Nicephorus reporteth of one Synesius , who auouched that God & the lawes , and the holy hand of Thesphylus had giuen him a wife . Ambrose saith , That mariage ought to be sāctified , with the vaile wherewith the Priest was wont to couer the Bride and the Bride-groome in the publike congregation , and with his blessing . The third and last action belonging to the accomplishment of this estate , is , that of the parties themselues , whereby the Bride is in decent and modest manner , brought vnto the house and home of the Bride-groome . It is the law of this estate published by God himselfe in Paradise , that the man , euen in respect of habitation , should leaue father and mother and cleaue to his wife , Gen. 2. 24 , Heere question is moued , whether mariage is to be solemnized with mirth and feasting . Answ. I. It is lawfull and warrantable to vse feasting and mirth at mariages , because these be things indifferent , and wee haue examples thereof in the Scriptures . Laban made a feast at the wedding of Iacob and Rachel , and inuited all the men of the place to it , Gen. 29. 22. Christ himselfe did approue the resort of people to the mariage at Cana in Galilee , both by his presence , and by that honorable gift of sixe water-pots of the best wine , Ioh. 2. 2. 7. 8. II. It is not only lawfull , but conuenient and fit to be done , if there be abilitie ; according to the commendable custome of the place & countrie wherin men do dwell ; so as in the vse thereof , these cautions bee obserued . First , that in mirth and merry-making , there be care had that nothing be done which is dishonest , prophane , or of ill report . Philip. 4. 8. Whatsoeuer things are honestpure of good report , thinke on these things . Secondly , That ioy in them be mixed and moderated with the feare of God , without which Laughter and reioycing is meere madnesse , Eccles. 2. 2. Thirdly , That it bee performed in a moderate and sober vse of the creatures , without riot & excesse . Thus we reade that at the great feast of Ahashuerosh , it was appointed by the King himself , that they should drink orderly , & none might compel another to drinke more then he thought conuenient , Ester 1. 8. And where weddings are kept contrary to these directions , they are not feasts celebrated vnto God , but vnto y e diuell ; which also may be said of all other festiuall meetings . And so much touching the point of mariage , in which this is to be remembred for a cōclusion , That where there is generally a nullitie in the contract , or a separation following vpon it , there is also a nullity in regard of the consummation of mariage . CHAP. 9. Of the duties of married persons . THus farre haue we proceeded in the doctrine of marriage ; and now we come to the duties which they who bee maried are to performe each to other . These are principally two : Cohabitation , and Communion . Cohabitation is their quiet and comfortable dwelling together in one place , for the better performance of mutuall duties . 1. Cor. 7. 10. And to the married command I , not I but the Lord , let not the wife separate her selfe from her husband : vers . 12. But to the remnant I say , not the Lord , If any brother haue an vnbeleeuing wife , and she be content to dwell with him , let him not forsake her : vers . 13. And the wife which hath an vnbeleeuing husband , which is content to dwell with her , let her not forsake him . 1. Pet. 3. 7. Likewise let the men dwell together , as becōmeth them that haue knowledge ; giuing honor to the woman as to the weaker vessell , euen as they which are heires together of the grace of life , that your prayers be not interrupted . This dutie must bee kept especiallie the first yeare of mariage , Deut. 24. 5. When a man taketh a wife , hee shall not go on warfare , neither shall be charged with any busines , but shall bee free at home one yeare , & reioyce with his wife which he hath taken . And the ground of this commandement , no doubt , is , that they might learne to know one anothers cōditions , and that they might worke a setled affection one towards another , which afterward vpon no occasion might bee changed . Yet they may bee absent each from other in two cases : First , vpon mutuall consent for a time , for the performing of some busines , that is requisite for the familie , Prou. 7. 19. For mine husband is not at home , he is gone a far iourney : at the appointed time he will returne againe . Secondly , the like absence is allowed , when some great and weightie affaires either in the Church or Common-wealth are in hand , 2. Sam. 11. 9. 10. But Vriah slept at the doore of the Kings Palace , with all the seruants of his Lord , and went not downe to his house ? v. II. Then Vriah answered Dauid ; The Arke , and Israel , and Iudah dwell in tents , and my Lord Ioab , and all the seruants of my Lord abide in the open field ; shall I then go into my house to eate , and drinke , and lie with my wife ? by thy life , and by the life of my soule , I will not do this thing . Hence ariseth a question : What if after mariage consummate , there grow vpon one of the parties a contagious disease that cannot be cured , but is so lothsome , that the other whole partie cannot endure cohabitation at all ? Answ. Both the mariage it selfe , and the dutie of dwelling together , ought to continue firme and sure notwithstanding : yet so as the sound partie neither may , nor ought in good conscience , to desire coniunction with the other , whereby he , or she may bring infection vpon themselues , and consequently hurt their children , and indanger the Common-wealth . But if either of the parties haue not the gift of continencie , nor cannot abstaine ; they must sue for it vnto God in earnest prayer , who will giue it vnto them . For there God hath called a man or woman to continencie , where they be necessarily hindred from the vse of the ordinarie and lawfull remedie of the contract . The contrarie to Cohabitation is Desertion . Desertion is , when one of the married folkes , vpon a wilfull , and obstinate mind of their owne head , departeth from the other , without a iust , and necessarie cause . Touching this point , there bee sundrie Cases expounded . I. Case . Suppose that an husband which is an vnbeleeuer , or an heretike in the foundation , of his owne accord , vpon detestation of true religion , quite forsakes the beleeuing wife , and denies any more to dwell with her ; what is to be done ? Answ. All good meanes must bee first vsed to bring the infected partie to repentance ; and when none will succeed , but the case remaineth desperate , then mariage is dissolued on his part , and the beleeuing wife is free to marrie another . So saith the Apostle , 1. Cor. 7. 15. If the vnbeleeuing partie depart , let him depart ; a brother or a sister is not in subiection in such things ; but God hath called vs vnto peace . In which words obserue a twofold reason : I. He that is at libertie may marrie another ; now the beleeuing partie forsaken , is at libertie ; because hee is not in subiection in such things : therefore he may marrie another . II. God hath called vs vnto peace , saith Paul , and this peace cannot be kept , if the beleeuing partie forsaken cannot containe , vnlesse he marrie . Ambrose vpon the place saith , That mariage cannot stand firme , which is separated from the worship and seruice of God ; and therefore it is no sinne in the partie that is for saken for Gods cause , to be married to another ; and the vnbeleeuer departing , sinneth both against God , and against the law of wedlock , because he denies to remain in that estate , in regard of religion . Therefore hee breakes the couenant of mariage , and the other is not bound in this case to keepe touch with him . the master of the sentences , saith , That the beleeuing partie in this case , is not bound to follow the vnbeleeuer when hee departeth , but while hee liues may marrie another . Augustine affirmeth , that euen the wife which is ioyned to her husband in lawfull societie , if shee will not abide with her Christian husband , because he is a Christian , may be forsaken and left , without sin . And it is far better that the couenant should be dissolued , that man and wife haue made each with other , then that the Couenant which man hath made with God. The people of Israel being in affliction , were constrained to break the former made with strange women , that they might keepe the latter , Ezra 10. 11. 19. It is alledged , that the vnbeleeuing partie may haply repent , and then to make a dissolution is in vaine . But I say , that it is as likely that he will neuer repent , and therefore there is cause that the knot should be dissolued . Againe , it is lawfull ( say some ) to make a diuorce out of the case of Adulterie . Answ. The belieuing partie which is forsaken , is not the cause of the diuorce , but is a patient of the separation , wrongfully made by the vnbeleeuer . And Christ where he mentioneth the Case of Adulterie , Matth. 19. speaketh of an equall mariage , whereas Paul speakes of an vnequall . II. Case . What if there fall out a desertion betweene two married folkes , which are both beleeuers ? Answ. The faultie person , who is the cause of this desertion , is to be forced by course of Ciuill , and Ecclesiasticall censure , to performe his , or her dutie . Vpon which proceeding , if he remaine obstinate and peruerse in will ; the other must in patience , & earnest prayer vnto God , waite the time , vntill his mind may be changed , and he made to relent by the order of the Magistrate . But if the one of them , by iust occasion of feare , be compelled to depart from the other ; and cannot returne againe without apparent danger of life ; in this case they are not bound to returne ; but the delinquent partie is to remaine solitarie , till they be instructed and made willing to doe their duties : and in the meane while , the partie innocent must be resolued that God hath called him or her to single life . Againe , be it that the one is resolutely vnwilling to dwell with the other , and thereupon flies away without any fault of the other ; if the thing after a long space bee sufficiently knowne before-hand , and all possible meanes haue been vsed , to reclaime the guiltie person ; yea being called , he doth not personally appeare before the Iudge , to yeeld a reason of the fact ; after publike and solemne declaration made , the Minister vpon such desertion , may pronounce the mariage to be dissolued . For he that vpon malice flieth away from his mate , is to bee holden in the same termes with an vnbelieuer , who departs vpon detestation of religion , and the seruice of God , 1. Tim. 5. 8. Howbeit , if the place whither he is fled , be vnknowne , and vpon his flight there be found some fault in the Plaintiffe , she is not to be heard , or set at libertie by the Iudge in this case , though shee pretend want of the gift of continencie . But suppose he that fled come againe vnlooked for , and requires his spouse ; then in case the former course hath not bin taken , nor iudgement giuen against him , they may be reconciled and come together againe . If it hath , and matters be concluded , hee is not vpon his returne to bee heard , but rather seuerely punished . Like vnto Desertion , is malicious and spitefull dealing of married folkes one with the other . Malicious dealing is , when dwelling together , they require each of other intolerable conditions : and when the one doth not regard nor relieue the other , being in danger or extremity , as is meet . For this is as much as to betray one anothers estate and life to their vtter enemies . Heere it may be demanded , what a belieuer should do , who is in certaine and imminent danger , either of losse of life , or breach of conscience , if they both abide together ? Answ. I. This certaine danger hath his originall , either from one that is a stranger , or from one of the parties : If from a stranger , then the husband either takes vpon him the defence of his belieuing wife , or not ; if he doth , then she ought to abide with him . If not , she may depart and prouide for her owne safetie . II. Againe , if the husband threatneth hurt , the belieuing wife may flie in this case ; and it is all one , as if the vnbelieuing man should depart . For to depart from one , and driue one away by threats , are aequipollent . Neither may this seeme strange vnto any , that the belieuer in such case is allowed to depart . For a husband that is a Christian is married two waies : First with Christ , and secondly with his wife . The former mariage is made in Baptisme , and is a more holy coniunction , then is the latter . Therfore when these two cannot stand together , but one of them must needs be dissolued ; the latter must rather be left then the former . Againe , if the belieuer should remaine with the vnbelieuer , she should haplie be vrged sometimes , in case of danger vpon infirmitie , to deny Christ , & make ship wracke of faith and good conscience ; which may in no sort be done of either partie : and therefore separation is to be made rather in this society , then that the cōiunction with Christ should not stand firme , and continue . It is alledged , that if this be so , then the belieuing wife forsakes the vnbelieuing husband , which she may not do . Answ. She forsakes him not finally , but leaues him for a time . Againe , the desertion is not made by the person , which giueth place for the time , but by him in whom is the cause of the desertion ; euen as he is not to be termed a Schismatike , which separateth himself , but hee in whom is the cause of the Schisme . Againe , it is obiected , that he which flieth leaues his calling ; and euery man must abide in his calling ; according to the rule of the Apostle , 1. Cor. 7. 20. Answ. There is a double calling ; The generall , standing in the worship of God ; The particular , as the calling of mariage , or of single life . When these two callings cannot stand together , the latter must giue place to the former , Luk. 14. 26. If any man come to me , & hate not his father , and mother , and wife , and children , and brethren , and sisters ; yea and his owne life also , he cannot be my disciple . III. Case . When the husband is perpetually absent from the wife , what is to be done ? Answ. If he be absent either because he is in captiuitie , or vpon malice , or feare , or any such like cause ; the wife must rest in expectation of his returne , till she hath notice of his death , either by sufficient testimonie , or by apparant likelihoods . Now in the want of testimonies , and coniectures in this behalfe , if the partie forsaken cannot certainly determine , that the absence was made vpon an euill mind ; some haue thought that it behoueth her to expect his comming again for the space of foure years ; others of fiue ; some of seuen , some of ten yeares ; after which time , she is free , and may marrie another man. And if the partie do haplie returne againe after some long space of time , who was probablie thought to haue been dead , the latter ma●iage vndertaken vpon necessarie ignorance of such an euent , may be dissolued ; and it shall not be imputed to either partie , considering it fell out not by their fault , but only by accident . Now if the question bee of wilfull and affected absence , the same is to be determined concerning that , which hath bin said before touching the point of Desertion . CHAP. 10. Of the Communion of married folkes , and of due beneuolence . THe cōmunion of man & wife , is that dutie , whereby they do mutually and willingly communicate , both their persons , & goods each to other , for their mutuall helpe , necessitie and comfort , Ephes. 5. 28. So ought mē to loue their wiues as their own bodies ; he that loueth his wife , loueth himselfe . This dutie consisteth principally in the performance of special beneuolēce one to another , & that not of courtesie , but of due debt , 1. Cor. 7. 3. Let the husband giue vnto the wife due beneuolence , and likewise also the wife vnto the husband . Due beneuolence must be shewed with a singular and entire affection one towards another ; and that three waies principally . First , by the right and lawfull vse of their bodies , or of the marriage-bed , which is indeed an essentiall dutie of mariage . The mariage-bed signifieth that solitarie and secret societie , that is betweene man and wife alone . And it is a thing of it owne nature indifferent ; neither good nor bad ; and so Paul numbereth it amongst indifferent things , 1. Cor. 7. 27. Art thou bound vnto a wife ? seeke not to be loosed : art thou loosed from a wife ? seeke not a wife . Wherfore the Church of Rome erreth two contrarie waies . First , in that it maketh mariage to be a Sacrament , and so euerie action of it , to be of the owne nature good . Secondly , in that they prohibite mariage of certaine parties , and the reason of the prohibition may seeme to be this ; that they thinke this secret comming together of man and wife to be filthines . This was the sentence of Syricius , that filthie Pope of Rome ; who determined that mariage was the vncleannesse of the flesh , and to that purpose abused the words of the Apostle , Rom. 8. 8. affirming , that they which are in the flesh , that is , in the estate of Matrimonie , cannot please God. Yea and after that mariage was condemned by them , some began to detest and hate women , as Ephraim the Syrian , of whō Ecclesiasticall stories make mention . And the Councell of Trent is of the same iudgement . For whereas it opposeth mariage and chastitie ; it plainly determineth that in mariage there is no chastitie . This comming together of man and wife , although it be indifferent , yet by the holy vsage thereof , it is made a holy and vndefiled action , Hebr. 13. 4. Mariage is honorable among all , and the bedde vndefiled . And it is ( as all other creatures and ordinances of God are ) sanctified by the word & praier , 1. Tim. 4. 3. — Forbidding to marry , &c. v. 4. — And nothing ought to be refused : — for it is sanctified by the word of God , & praier . In which place it is to be obserued , how the Apostle applieth the point of sanctification directly to mariage . The word of God giueth direction to married folkes two wayes . First , by giuing them warrant , that they may lawfully do this action ; because whatsoeuer is not done of faith ( which faith must be grounded on Gods word ) is a sin . Secondly , by prescribing the right and holy manner of doing the same . The holy maner stands in these particulars . First , that it be done in moderation . For euen in wedlocke excesse in lusts is no better then plaine adulterie before God. This is the iudgement of the ancient Church , that Intemperance , that is , immoderate desire euen betweene man and wife , is fornication . Secondly , that it be vsed in an holy abstinence . Abstinence from this secret societie , must be vsed in two cases . First , while the woman is in her flowers , Leuit. 18. 19. Thou shalt not go to a woman to vncouer her shame , as long as shee is put apart for her disease . And it is made one of the properties of a good man , not to lie with a menstruous woman , Ezek. 18. 6. Secondly , in the time of a solemne fast , when some grieuous calamitie is imminent . Then they are to giue themselues ( by mutuall consent ) to fasting and prayer , 1. Cor. 7. 5. Defraud not one another , except it be with consent for a time , that you may giue your selues to fasting and prayer : and againe come together , that Satan tempt you not for your incontinencie . 2. Sam. 11. 11. Then Vriah answered Dauid , The Arke , and Israel , and Iudah dwell intents : and my Lord Ioab , and the seruants of my Lord abide in the open fields : shall I then go into mine house to eate and drinke , and lie with my wife ? By thy life , and by the life of thy soule , I will not do this thing . Zach. 12. 12. The familie of the house of Dauid shall mourne apart , and their wiues apart ; the familie of the house of Nathan apart , and their wiues apart , &c. Next vnto the word , this action may be sanctified by prayer , for a blessing vpon it . Children are the gift of God , and therfore married folkes are not only to vse the meanes , but also to pray for the obtaining of them , Psal. 113. 9. He maketh the barren woman to dwell with a familie , and to be a ioyfull mother of children . Psal. 127. 3. Behold children are the inheritance of the Lord , and the fruit of the wombe his reward . Examples for this purpose are these , Gen. 25. 21. Isaac prayed vnto the Lord for his wife , because shee was barren , and the Lord was intreated of him ; and Rebekah his wife conceiued . 1. Sam. 1. 26. 27. And she said , Oh my Lord , as thy soule liueth , my Lord , I am the woman that stood with thee here , praying vnto the Lord. vers . 27. I prayed for this child , and the Lord hath giuen me my desire , which I asked of him . Now the fruits , which are reaped and inioyed by this holy vsage of the mariage bed , are three . I. The hauing of a blessed seed . Deut. 28. 1. If thou shalt obey diligently the voice of the Lord thy God , &c. Blessed shall be the fruit of thy bodie , and the fruit of thy ground . Which also is called the seed of God , being begot in an holy maner , Mal. 2. 15. And did not he make one ? yet had he abundance of Spirit : And wherefore one ? because he sought a seed of God : therefore keepe your selues in your spirit , and let none trespasse against the wife of his youth . II. The preseruation of the bodie in cleannesse , that it may be a fit Temple for the holy Ghost to dwell in , 1. Thess. 4. 3. 4. This is the will of God , euen your sanctification , that euery one of you should know how to possesse his vessell in holines and honor , and not in the lust of concupiscence , euen as the Gentiles that know not God. III. The holy estate of marriage is a liuely type of Christ and his Church , and this communion of married persons , is also a figure of the coniunction that is betweene him , and the faithfull , Hos. 2. 19. I will marrie thee vnto me , for euer ; yea I will marrie the vnto me in righteousnes , in iudgement , in mercie and in cōpassion : I will euen marrie thee vnto me in faithfulnes , and thou shalt know the Lord. Ephes. 5. 23. For the husband is the wiues head , euen as Christ is the head of the Church , and the same is the Sauiour of his bodie . Heere some questions are to be resolued . Case . I. Whether may mariage be dissolued in the case of barrennesse ? Answ. No. For barrennesse is an hidden infirmitie for the most part , and which God hath many times cured , euen when it seemed to be desperate , as in Sarah . Again , the fruit of the wombe is Gods blessing ; and wholly dependeth vpon him . Hee therefore that in want of children , reiecteth his wife , whom he hath receiued at the hands of God , offereth wrong euen to God himselfe . Case II. What if either of the married folkes commit fornication , or any sinne of the same kind greater then fornication , as Incest , Sodomie , lying with beasts , or such like . Answ. Adulterie and fornication are most grieuous and open crimes , which do breake the very bond and couenant of mariage , Prou. 2. 17. and therfore when they are certainly knowne by such persons , they are at no hand to be winked at , but the Magistrate is presently to be informed of them . Howbeit , if the innocent partie be willing to receiue the adulterer againe , in regard of his repentance ; lest hee should seeme to fauour and maintaine sin , and to bee himselfe a practiser of vncleannesse , he is to repaire to the Congregation , and declare the whole matter to the Minister , that he may vnderstand the parties repentance , and desire of forgiuenesse . And if the adulteresse hath conceiued , and is in trauell , the husband to auoid the imputation of hauing an heire in bastardie , is to make relation to the Church of the repentance of the adulteresse ; or to acquaint some certaine persons therewith , not to the end that she should be punished for the fact , but that they may take notice of a child cōceiued in adultery , whom afterward he may lawfully put off , as none of his . The matter being knowne , the innocent partie may require a diuorcement . For adulterie is such a sin , as doth quite break off not only the vse , but the bond and couenant of mariage , Matth. 19. 9. I say therefore vnto you , that whosoeuer shall put away his wife , except it be for whoredome , and marrie another , committeth adulterie , &c. And yet the same bond may be continued , and grow vp againe by the good will and consent of the partie innocent , and consequently they may be reconciled , and dwell together still . 1. Sam. 25. 44. Now Saul had giuen Michal his daughter Dauids wife , to Phalti the sonne of Laish , which was of Gallim . 2. Sam. 3. 14. Then Dauid sent messengers to Ishbosheth Sauls sonne , saying , Deliuer me my wife Michal , which I married for an hundred foreskins of the Philistims . The same course may be taken in like cases by the innocent , specially vpon the repentance of the guiltie person . But yet euery man must be left to his owne conscience , and none is to bee compelled to take another , from whom hee may iustly bee separated against his will. Now in requiring of a diuorce , there is an equall right and power in both parties , so as the woman may require it as well as the man ; and he as wel as she . The reason is , because they are equally bound each to other , and haue also the same interest in one anothers bodie ; prouided alwaies , that the man is to maintaine his superioritie , and the woman to obserue that modestie which beseemeth her towards the man. After the diuorcement made , it shal be lawful for the harmelesse partie , not hauing the gift of continencie , vpon leaue obtained of the Church , and the Christian Magistrate , to marrie againe . But what then shall become of the partie offending ? Answ. If vpon the hazard of his Conscience in want of the remedie , any libertie of second mariage , bee to bee granted vnto him by the Church or Ciuill Magistrate ; ( as indeed here in England there is not ; ) diuers restraints , in this Case , must be obserued . First , no such libertie is to be granted , so long as the matter remaines vncertaine , whether they may be reconciled , specially while the partie innocent liueth in single life . Secondly , it must euidently appeare , that the said offending partie hath earnestly rpented him of his sin , before he can either be receiued into the Church , or admitted to a second mariage . Thirdly , this liberty is not to be granted him either presently , or vnaduisedly ; but vpon frequent and serious admonition , rather to giue himselfe to mourning and lamentation , and still to remaine alone , then to desire againe to enioy the benefit of that state , which he hath alreadie so shamefully abused . So much of the first way of performance of due beneuolence . The second way is , by cherishing one another : Ephes. 5. 29. No man euer hated his owne flesh , but nourisheth and cherisheth it , as Christ also doth the Church . This cherishing is the performing of any duties , that tend to the preseruing of the liues one of another . Wherefore they are freely to cōmunicate their goods , their coūsel , their labors each to other ; for the good of themselues and theirs . The third way is , by an holy kind of reioicing and solacing themselues each with other , in a mutuall declaration of the signes and tokens of loue and kindnesse . Prou. 5. 18. Reioyce with the wife of thy youth : vers . 19. Let her be as the louing Hind , and pleasant wild goat : let her breasts satisfie thee at all times , and delight in her loue continually . Cantic . 1. 1. Let him kisse me with the kisses of his mouth , for thy loue is better them wine . Gen. 26. 8. So after he had bin there a long time , Abimelek King of the Philistims , looked out at a window , and loe , hee saw Isaak sporting with Rebekah his wife : Then Abimelek called Isaak and said ; Loe , shee is of a suretie thy wife . Esay 62. 7. As a yong man marrieth a virgin , so shall thy sonnes marrie thee ; and as a Bridegroome is glad of the Bride , so shall thy God reioyce ouer thee . This reioycing and delight is more permitted to the man , then to the woman ; and to them both , more in their yong yeares , then in their old age . CHAP. 11. Of the Husband . MArried folkes are either husbād or wife . The husband is he which hath authoritie ouer the wife ; hereupon in Scripture he is called the guide of her youth , Prou. 2. 17. and they twaine being but one flesh , he is also the head ouer his wife . The duties of the husband towards the wife , are these : I. To loue her as himselfe : Eph. 5. 33. Let euery one loue his wife euen as himselfe . Gen. 24. 67. Afterward Isaak brought her vnto the tent of Sarah his mother ; and hee tooke Rebekah and she was his wife , and he loued her : so Isaak left mourning for his mother . Note , how the loue of the husband to the wife , mitigates sorrow for the death of the mother . He is to shew this loue in two things : First in protecting her from danger , Gen. 20. 16. And vnto Sarah he said , behold I haue giuen 1000. shekels of siluer vnto thy brother : behold he is the couering of thine eies amongst all that are with thee . Let it be knowne amongst all , & be thou instructed . 1. Sam. 30. 5. Dauids two wiues were taken prisoners also , Ahinoam the Izreelite , and Abigail the wife of Nabal the Carmelite : v. 8. Then Dauid asked counsell of the Lord saying ; Shall I follow after this companie , ? shall I ouertake them ? And hee answered him , Follow , for thou shalt surely ouertake them , and recouer all . Secondly , in regarding her estate as his owne , and prouiding maintenance for her , both for his life time , and as much as he may , for time to come after his death . Ephes. 5. 28. So ought men to loue their wiues , as their owne bodies : he that loueth his wife loueth himselfe ; vers . 29. For no man yet hated his owne flesh , but nourisheth it , &c. Exod. 21. 10. If he take him another wife , he shall not diminish her food , her rayment , and recompence of her virginitie . Ruth . 3. 9. Vnto whom he said , who art thou ? which said ; I am Ruth thine handmaid , spread therefore the wing of thy garment ouer thine handmaid ; for thou art the kinsman . II. To honor his wife : 1. Pet. 3. 7. Giuing honor to the woman . This honor stands in three things : First , in making account of her , as his companion , or yoke-fellow . For this cause , the woman , when she was created , was not takē out of the mans head , because she was not made to rule ouer him ; nor out of his feet , because God did not make her subiect to him as a seruant ; but out of his side , to the end that man should take her as his mate . Secōdly , in a wise & patiēt bearing or couering of her infirmities , as anger , waywardnes and such like , in respect of the weaknes of her sexe , 1. Pet. 3. 7. Giuing honor to the woman , as vnto the weaker vessell , seeing yee are heires together of the grace of life , that your prayers bee not hindred . Thirdly , by suffering himselfe sometimes to be admonished or aduised by her . It was Gods commandement to Abraham concerning Sarah his wife ; Let it not be grieuous in thy sight for the child , and for thy bond-woman : in all that Sarah shall say vnto thee , heare her voice ; For in Isaak shall thy seed be called , Gen. 21. 12. Thus Elkanah was willing to subscribe vnto his wife Annaes aduice , for her tarrying at home till the child was weaned , 1. Sam. 1. 23. And Elkanah her husband said vnto her , do what seemeth thee best : tarrie vntill thou hast weaned him : only the Lord accomplish his word . Hereupon the Heathen Philosopher said , That the master of the familie exerciseth ( after a sort ) a power Tyrannical ouer his seruants , a power Regall ouer his children ; because Kings are fathers of their Cōmon-weales : but in respect of his wife , he exerciseth a power Aristocraticall , not after his owne will , but agreeable to the honor and dignitie of the married estate ; and consequently , that he ought not in modestie to challenge the priuiledge of prescribing and aduertising his wife in al matters domesticall , but in some to leaue her , to her owne will and iudgement . Heere question is moued , whether the husband may correct the wife ? Answ. Though the husband be the wiues head , yet it seemeth he hath no power nor libertie granted him in this regard . For we reade not in the Scriptures , any precept or example to warrant such practise of his authoritie . He may reproue & admonish her in word only , if he seeth her in fault . For , thus we reade , that Iacob censured his wife , being impatient , euen in anger , Gen. 30. 2. Am I in Gods stead , which hath withholden from thee , the fruit of the wombe ? And Iob reproued his wife , Iob 2. 10. Thou speakest like a foolish woman . What ? Shall we receiue good at the hand of God , and not receiue euill ? But hee may not chastise her either with stripes , or stroks . The reason is plaine ; Wiues are their husbands mates ; and they two be one flesh . And no man will hate , much lesse beat his owne flesh , but nourisheth and cherisheth it , Ephes. 5. 29. Againe , it is the commandement of God , that man should not trespasse against the wife of his youth , Malac. 2. 15. Chrysostome saith , It is the greatest reproch for any man , that can bee , to beate his wife . Plutarch in the life of Cato the Censor , affirmeth , that he which smiteth his wife , doth all one , as if he should lay violent hands vpon the sacred images of the gods , which was counted an high degree of offence among the Heathen . It is alledged , Husbands are cōmanded so to loue their wiues , as Christ doth his Church ; now Christ chastiseth his Church , with strokes ; & therefore so may the husband his wife . Answ. As Christ doth entirely loue his Church , so hee may also chastise the same , because hee is not only the husband , but also absolute Lord and King of his Church : so is not the husband absolute ouer the wife . But his authority ouer the wife , is after a sort ciuill , as is the authoritie of the Magistrate ouer his people . Ans. It is not so . For the Magistrate hath in his hand the power of the sword , by which power he inflicteth punishment in case of offence . But the husband can challenge to himselfe no such power : yea it is flatly forbidden in the Ciuil law , that he should scourge or strike his wife . Neuerthelesse , if she grow to extremities , and be desperately peruerse , so as there be no hope of amendment ; then the Magistrate may be informed , who to preuent scandals , and to prouide for publike peace , both ought and may assigne vnto her necessary correction , and punishment according to her desert . Now the husband that hath a wife so stubborne and peeuish , must beare it , if it may be borne , as the portion of his crosse laid vpon him by God. And in this case , if he be impatient , he may in some sort be pardoned and pitied , but he is not wholly to be excused . CHAP. 12. Of the Wife . THe wife is the other married person , who being subiect to her husband , yeeldeth obedience vnto him . Touching the subiection of the wife , the word of God mētioneth it in sundrie places . Rom. 7. 2. The woman which is in subiection to the man , is bound by the law to the man , while he liueth . Ephes. 5. 24. As the Church is in subiection to Christ , euen so let the wiues bee to their husbands in euery thing . Colos. 3. 18. Wiues submit your selues vnto your husbands , as it is comely in the Lord. 1. Tim. 2. 12. I permit not a woman — to vsurpe authoritie ouer the man. And it was a law established by God immediately after the fal , Gen. 3. 16. Vnto the woman he said , I wil greatly increase , &c. and thy desire shal be subiect to thine husband , and he shall rule ouer thee . Indeed the daughter , according to the Ciuill law , euen when shee is married is * in the power of her father , and not of her husband . But this is directly against the law of Moses , and crosseth the law of Nature , Leuit. 22. 12. 13. Numb . 30. 13. Now the duties of the wife , are principally two . The first is , to submit her selfe to her husband ; and to acknowledge and reuerence him as her head in all things . Gen. 20. 16. Likewise Abimelech said vnto Sarah ; Behold thy brother , that is , thy husband , whom thou callest thy brother , is the vaile of thine eyes to all that are with thee . As if he should say , Thy husband is thy head , and hath power ouer thee , and thou oughtest to reuerence him . For of ancient times , the wife was couered with a vaile in the presence of her husband , in token of subiection to him . Thus Rebekah at the sight of Isaak tooke a vaile , and couered her head therewith , Gen. 24. 65. 1. Cor. 11. 3. The man is the womans head . Ephes. 5. 22. Wiues submit your selues vnto your husbands , as vnto the Lord ; for the husband is the wiues head , euen as Christ is the head of his Church . The reason hereof is good . For the wife enioyeth the priuiledges of her husband , and is graced by his honor and estimation amongst men . His Nobilitie maketh her noble , though otherwise shee is base and meane ; as contrariwise , his basenesse and low degree , causeth her , though shee bee by birth noble and honorable , to bee by estate base and meane . The second dutie is , to be obedient vnto her husband in all things ; that is , wholly to depend vpon him , both in iudgement and will. For looke as the Church yeelds obedience to Christ her head , and yeelds her selfe to be commanded , gouerned , and directed by him , so ought the woman to the man. So Sarah is said to obey Abraham , and to giue him the termes of obedience , Shee called him Lord , or Sir , 1. Pet. 3. 6. Hence it followeth , that the woman is not to take libertie of wandring , and straying abroad from her owne house , without the mans knowledge & cōsent . 2. King. 4. 22. Then she called to her husband and said , Send with me , I pray thee , one of the yong men , and one of the asses ; for I will haste to the man of God , and come againe . Againe , that shee is to follow her husband , when hee flitteth or departeth from place to place , vnlesse hee forsake either her or Christ. To this purpose Paul saith hee had power to lead about a wife , being a sister , as well as the rest of the Apostles , 1. Cor. 9. 5. Thus Sarah went with Abraham into Egypt , Gen. 12. 11. and out of Egypt , Gen. 13. 1. and to Gerar to soiourne there , Gen. 20. 1. 2. 3. Thus the wiues of Iacob departed with him , from their father Laban , Gen. 31. 17. Contrary to these duties , are the sins of wiues ; To be proud , to be vnwilling to beare the authority of their husbāds ; to chide and braule with bitternes ; to forsake their houses , &c. Prou. 27. 15. A continuall dropping in the day of raine , and a contentious woman are alike . vers . 16. He that hideth her , hideth the winde , & she is as the oyle in his right hand , that vttereth it selfe . Exod. 4. 26. Then Zipporah said , O bloodie husband ; because of the Circumcision . It was the fault of the Leuites Concubine , Iudg. 19. 2. Who played the whore , and went away from him vnto her fathers house to Bethlem Iudah , and there continued the space of foure moneths . It was the sinne of Queene Vashi , who refused to come at the Kings word , which he had giuen in charge to the Eunuches : therefore the King was verie angrie , and his warth kindled in him , Ester 1. 12. Lastly , to be a cause of griefe to their kindred . Thus the proud wiues of Esau , the daughters of the Hittites , were a griefe of mind to Isaak and Rebekah , Gen. 26. 35. & 27. 46. CHAP. 13. Of the Parent . HItherto hath been treated of the first Couple , whereof the family cōsisteth , namely , of married folkes . Now follow the other ; and they are of two sorts ; either such as , whereby the familie is increased , and multiplied ; or such as are helpes thereunto . Those whereby the familie is inlarged , are also of two sorts ; Parents and Children . Parents are they which haue power and authoritie ouer children . The duties of parents are especially two ; One to bring vp their children ; The other to bestow them , when they haue brought them vp . Touching Education or bringing vp of children , the parents care must bee , both that they may liue , and also that they may liue well , Ephes. 6. 4. Touching the preseruation of the life of the child , there are many duties required of the Parents , specially foure . First , the mother is her selfe to giue the infant sucke , and to wrap it vp in swadling clothes . Paul cōmends it for a note of a good wife , to nurse her owne children , 1. Tim. 5. 10. Thus Sarah gaue sucke to Isaak , Gen. 21. 7. Anna nursed Samuel , 1. Sam. 1. 22. Dauid in likelihood was nursed by his mother , Psal. 22. 9. Thou gauest me hope euen at my mothers breasts . And our Sauiour Christ was also nursed by Marie his mother , Luk. 11. 27. and swadled , Luk. 2. 7. Now the reason hereof is plaine . God hath giuen milke to women that beare children , & hath so appointed , that no meat is more naturall to the child , then the mothers milke . And nature it selfe teacheth this in the course of other creatures . The earth nourisheth that which it bringeth forth . The fruit which the tree beareth is fed by the sap that comes from the root therof . Yea amongst the bruit beasts , euen those that be most sauage , as the Tigres , do giue sucke vnto the yong ones which they bring forth . Yet in case of want of health , or abilitie , or any other iust impediment , the mother may in equity beforborne , and the child committed vnto a nurse . And so we reade that Rebekah the daughter of Bethuel , and afterward the wife of Isaak had a nurse , Genes . 24. 59. whose name was Deborah , Gen. 35. 8. And Pharaohs daughter in a case of necessitie , committed Moses to be nursed of an Hebrew woman , whom she tooke not to be his mother , but a stranger ; and her fact was allowed by God , Exod. 2. 7. 9. The second dutie of the Parent is , to prouide for his child meate , drinke , and clothing . Our Sauiour Christ saith , that Parents euen by the light of nature , though they be euill , will not denie or withhold necessarie food from their children : Mat. 7. 9. 10. What man is there among you , that if his son aske him bread , will giue him a stone , or if he aske a fish , will giue him a scorpion ? And Paul saith , If there be any that prouideth not for his owne , and namely for them of his houshold , hee denieth the faith , and is worse then an Infidell , 1. Tim. 5. 8. The third dutie is , when God giueth abilitie & meanes , to lay vp some thing for the future maintenance of the child . 2. Cor. 12. 14. — for the children ought not to lay vp for the fathers , but the fathers for the children . Prou. 19. 14. House and riches are the inheritance of the fathers . The fourth is , to obserue both the inclination , and the naturall gifts of bodie and mind that are in the child , and accordingly to bestow it in some honest calling & course of life . Prou. 20. 11. A child is knowne by his actions , whether his worke be pure and right . In the Ecclesiasticall historie , written by Ruffinus , it is recorded , that Alexander Bishop of Alexandria , saw a far off , in a place neare to the sea , a companie of children playing together , and in their play imitating himselfe in sundrie Ministeriall actions . And whē he had a while viewed them , he perceiued that they examined & baptised one another , according to the solemne order vsed in y ● Cōgregation : which thing , whē he had made some of his Clergie acquainted withall , and taken order that the children should be sent for , and brought before him , he demanded of them , what sport they vsed , and in what manner they played one with another . The children at first , for feare , denied what they had done , yet vpon further examination they confessed , that they had made Athanasius ( who afterward became Bishop of the place ) their Bishop , and that hee instructed and baptised sundrie of their companie . He further asked both Athanasius himselfe , and those which were said to haue been baptised , what questions he asked them , and what answeres they gaue ; and perceiuing by their speeches , that they had framed themselues , though in sporting maner , to the Church-proceedings in those actions ; vpon conference had with his Clergie , hee determined , that those which had first been asked , and had giuen answere fully , according to the forme vsed in that Church , and thereupon baptised , should not be rebaptised . And for Athanasius and the other children , which had done the part of Ministers in their kind , he sent for their parents , and gaue them great charge that they should be brought vp in learning and religion , that so they might in time be fit for the publike Ministerie . The like course we reade to haue been taken by the Heathen , for iudgement of the inclination and towardnesse of their children . The Athenians made a law , that before children were bestowed in any calling , they should bee first brought into a publike place , where Instruments belonging to all sorts of trades were laid ; and look in what kind of Instrument any of them tooke most delight , the child was thought to bee most fit for the trade , whereunto that Instrument belonged , and afterward applied to the same with good successe . Now the Parents first and principall care must be for the Church ; that those of their children which haue the most pregnant wit , and be indued with the best gifts , be consecrated vnto God , and brought vp in the studie of the Scriptures , to serue afterward in the Ministerie of the Church . Thus Anna dedicated Samuel her son vnto God by vow , 1. Sam. 1. 11. And shee vowed a vow , and said , O Lord of Hostes , if thou wilt — giue vnto thine handmaid a man-child , thē I wil giue him vnto the Lord all the daies of his life . And she did according to her vow , and the Lord blessed Samuel her sonne , who in processe of time became a great Prophet . The next point of Education of children , is to prouide that they may liue well , and lead a godly life . To this purpose Parents must do three things . First , they are to be carefull , that the child , so soone as may bee , after it is borne , bee admitted into the true Church of God by Baptisme , and haue a fit name giuen vnto it . Secondly , they are to endeuour to sow the seeds of godlinesse and religion in the heart of the child , so soone as it comes to the vse of reason and vnderstanding ; and as it growes in yeares , so care must be had that it grow in knowledge and grace . To this purpose is the vow and promise made in Baptisme , which parents are bound to call vpon the child to remember , when it comes to yeares . It was the godly care of Timothies parents , 2. Tim. 3. 14. But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned , knowing of whom thou hast learned them , vers . 15. And that thou hast knowne the holy Scriptures of a child , which are able to make thee wise vnto saluation , through the faith which is in Christ Iesus . This was the commandement of God to the parents of his people , Deut. 6. 7. Thou shalt rehearse these words which I command thee continually to thy children , and shalt talke of them whē thou tarriest in the house . And vers . 20. When thy sonne shall aske thee in time to come , saying ; What meane these Testimonies , and Ordinances , and Lawes , which the Lord our God hath commanded you ? Then thou shalt say vnto thy sonne ; We were Pharaohs bondmen in Egypt , &c. This was obserued by the Israelites in the ages ●cceeding : Psal. 44. 1. We haue heard with our eares , O God : our fathers haue told vs the workes that thou hast done in their daies in old time . Thirdly , the first instruction of children in learning & religion , must be so ordered , that they may take it with delight . For which purpose , they may be sometimes allowed in moderate maner to play , and solace themselues in recreatiōs fitting for their yeares . And if they do amisse in either , they are to bee restrained by the bridle of discipline . First by reproofe in word , and when that wil not helpe , by the rodde of correction . Zach. 8. 5. The streets of the citie shall bee full of boyes and girles , playing in the streets thereof . Prou. 29. 15. The rod and correction giue wisdome , but a child set at libertie makes his mother ashamed . vers . 17. Correct thy son , and he will giue thee rest , and giue pleasures to thy soule . Hebr. 12. 9. We haue had the fathers of our bodies which correct vs , and we gaue them reuerence . Yet in this point , two extreames are carefully to be auoided ; That the Parent be not either too seuere , or too indulgent to the child . For seue●itie Paul giues his rule , Ephes. 6. 3. Parents prouoke not your children to anger , that is , by too much austeritie in gouernmēt . For lenitie , we haue old Eli his example , 1. Sam. 2. 23. And he said vnto them , Why do yee such things ? for of all this people , I heare euill reports of you . Doe no more my sonnes , &c. So much for Education . The second general dutie of parents , is the bestowing of their children ; This bestowing is , when they knowing their children fit for mariage , not to haue the gift of continencie , do vse their best indeuour to prouide matches for them in time , or at least , do aduise them therunto by themselues or by their friends : 1. Cor. 7. 36. If any man thinke it vncomelie for his virgin to passe the flower of her age , and need so require — let them bee married . vers . 38. he that giueth her to mariage , doth well . Ierem. 26. 6. Take yee wiues — and take wiues for your sonnes , and giue your daughters to husbands , &c. Gen. 28. 1. Isaak called Iacob and blessed him , and charged him and said vnto him ; Take not a wife of the daughters of Canaan : Arise , get thee to Padan Aram — and thence take thee a wife of the daughters of Laban thy mothers brother . Iudg. 14. 2. Sampson came and told his father and his mother , and said , I haue seene a woman in Timnah of the daughters of the Philistims ; now therefore giue me her to wife . This dutie is now adaies carelessely neglected of Parents ; and the fruit therof is dangerous . For hence it comes to passe , that their children oftentimes do either commit whoredome , or vndertake wicked and vngodly mariages . In the choice of a husband or wife , the Parents ought to haue a greater respect vnto pietie and wisedome , then vnto beautie and riches , or any other outward blessings . Yet where they all concurre , the partie so qualified is the more thankfully to be entertained . Vpon these grounds the Priest of Prince of Midian , gaue his daughter Zipporah to Moses , and Moses agreed to take her , Exod. 2. 19. A man of Egypt deliuered vs from the Philistims , and also drew vs water enough , & watered the sheepe — And Moses agreed to dwell with the man , who gaue vnto Moses Zipporah his daughter . Iosu. 15. 16. Then Caleb said , He that smiteth Kiriath-sepher , and taketh it , euen to him will I giue Achsah my daughter to wife . Yea it is a sinne to marrie only for beautie , without consideration of the better things . Thus the old world sinned , whē the sonnes of God saw the daughters of men that they were faire , and tooke them wiues of all that they liked , Gen. 6. 2. and Sampson , who only vpon the sight of the woman in Timnah , of the daughters of the Philistims , without further inquirie , desired that she might be giuen him for his wife , Iudg. 14. 2. Againe , it is meet that parēts should deale moderately with their children in this case , and not vndertake at any hand to force and compel them to marrie this or that partie . This was the iust commendation of Rebekahs parents , who though they were Idolaters , yet had that regard of equity , that they first called her and asked her consent , before they sent her away with Abrahams seruant , to be maried to Isaak , Gen. 24. 58. Now in case the Parents faile in their dutie in this regard , the son or daughter may lawfully declare the matter first to their kinsfolke , and afterward ( if need be ) to the Minister , or Magistrate , and sue for redresse by their means and direction . CHAP. 14. Of the Sonne . THe sonne is he , who is in subiection to his parents . The duties of a son to bee performed to his parents , are principally two . First to yeeld them obedience , whether they be his naturall parents or otherwise , as his step-father & step-mother , and that while he liueth . Eph. 6. 1. Children obey your parents in the Lord ; for this is right . Luke 2. 51. Then hee went downe with them , and came to Nazareth , and was subiect to them . Exod. 18. 19. Moses father in law said vnto him , Heare now my voice , I will giue thee counsell , and God shall be with thee . Ruth 3. 5. And Ruth said vnto Naomi her mother in law , All that thou biddest me , I wil do . Iob 1. 5. And whē the daies of their bāquetting were gone about , Iob sent and sanctified them . This obedience must shew it selfe in two things . First in the choyce of a lawfull calling , wherein the child is to be ordered and appointed at the discretion of the parent . Secondly in mariage : For in that , the parent is the principall agent and disposer of the child . Now although his authoritie be not so great , as that the child is to be forced and compelled by him ; yet the reuerent and dutifull respect which the child ought to beare towards him , ought to be a strong inducement , not to dissent , or renounce his aduice , without great and waightie cause . Yea the child must endeuour by all manner of dutifull cariage to ouercome , or at least to mitigate his parents seueritie in that behalfe . Now for the daughters : They must yeeld obedience to their parents in all Domesticall labours , that they may be skilfull in houshold affaires . Thus did the seuen daughters of the Priest of Midian , accustome themselues to draw water , and fill the troughes to water their fathers sheepe , Exod. 2. 16. Thus Rebekah was seene to come out of her fathers house , with her pitcher vpon her shoulder , and to go downe with it to the well to fill it , and giue drinke to her fathers Camels , Gen. 24. 16. 17. The second dutie of the sonne , is to recompence his fathers loue , and care ouer him , by relieuing him in case of want , if God giue abilitie , with food and rayment , and other necessaries . Herein children must deale with their parents , as the brood of the Storke is reported to do with her , by feeding her when she is old ; wherein they doe no more but what shee before hath done vnto them . It is Pauls counsell , that childred & nephewes should recompence the kindnes of their kindred in the first place , 1. Tim. 5. 4. and therefore to their parents , the head & foūdation of their kindred . When Ioseph was in prosperitie , and his father Iacob in want , he first gaue him corne freely ; and afterwards sent for him to Egypt , and there prouided for him ; in so much as the text saith of him , that he nourished his father and his brethren , and all his fathers house-hold with bread , Euen as the mother puts meat into the childs mouth , Gen. 47. 12. When Naomi the step-mother of Ruth was of great yeares , and her strength spent , Ruth gathered corne in the haruest for reliefe of them both . Yea when Boaz gaue her to eate and to drinke , she reserued part of her victuals , & brought it home with her gleanes to refresh her mother , Ruth 2. 14. 18. The necessitie of the performance of these duties is so great , that if the sonne neglecteth them , and doth the contrarie , by ill vsage of his parent , either in word or deed , he is worthie of death , euen by Moses law : Exod. 21. 15. He that smiteth his father or his mother , shall die the death . The law of the first borne of a mans children , that he should haue a greater portion of his fathers goods , then any of the rest of his brethren , is perpetuall , and admits no exception , but only in the case of notorious wickednes . Deut. 21. 17. He shall acknowledge the son of the hated for the first borne , & giue him a double portion of all that he hath , for he is the first of his strength , and to him belongeth the right of the first borne . This was the law ; yet we reade that Ruben lost this prerogatiue , by reason of his incest , and Iudah the fourth sonne of Iacob had the dignitie of the first borne , Gen. 49. 8. Thou Iudah , thy brethren shall prayse thee — thy fathers sonnes shall bow downe vnto thee . In the Church of the old Testament , the priuiledge of the first borne was three-fold ; the first of gouernment and royaltie , the second of Priesthood , the third of the double portion . And it is probable that this was for the most part Ceremoniall , and was accomplished and determined in Christ , who was the Image of the inuisible God , & the first borne of euery creature , Colos. 1. 15. Heere two questions are propounded . Quest. I. Whether is it lawfull for the sonne to make a vow belonging either to religion , or to ciuill conuersation , without the consent of the parent ? Answ. A vow so made is not of force to bind the child , but by the Law of nature & common equitie , is to be made void . For it is a ruled case , that he which is not his owne man , that is to say , at his owne libertie , but vnder the power of another , cannot bind himselfe . Againe , the authoritie of the parent by the law of God is great ; For it alloweth the father to make void the vow of the child pertaining to Gods worship , Numb . 30. 6. Quest. II. Whether is the consent of the parents to be required in the second mariages of their children ? Answ. 1. Of ancient times , both by * Ciuill lawes , & also by Imperial constitutions , it was prouided that no widowes , though made free by their former mariages , should make any contract againe , without the good will of their parents . 2. Consent in this case , though it be not absolutely necessarie , yet it is to be thought fit and conuenient , because children in some regards exempted from parents authoritie , doe owe notwithstanding the dutie of honor vnto them , by Gods expresse commandement , Exod. 20. 12. and consequently ought to testifie the same , by being ordered and aduised by them in some sort , euen at the after-bestowing of themselues . Hence it is , that * later Diuines haue holden vpon good ground ; That the espousals of widowes , who haue some more libertie , then the child first married , being made without their parents knowledge , cannot but incurre iust reprehension , howsoeuer they may stand in force without it . CHAP. 15. Of the Master . NExt vnto parents and children , wherby the family is increased , is a second sort of couples , which are helpes therunto . And they are Masters and seruants . The Master is a member in the familie , which hath power and beareth rule ouer the seruant . And his dutie stands principally in three things . First , To make a good choice of his seruants ; which is then done , when he inquireth first after such as feare God , and be willing to serue him . Paul makes the seruice and feare of God the maine ground of true obedience in seruants , Ephes. 6. 5. 6. 7. Colos. 3. 22. It was the rule of Dauids choice , Psal. 101. 6. Hee that walketh in the perfect way , he shall serue me . Abrahams chiefe seruāt of his house , was a man that feared God , as appeareth , in that he made conscience of his oath , Gen. 24. 2. 3. and prayed also for successe in the busines whereabout he was sent . Gen. 24. 12. O Lord God of my Master Abraham , I beseech thee send mee good speed this day , and shew mercie to my Master Abraham . Cornelius of Caesarea , the Captaine of the Italian band , had a souldier that daily attended on him , who feared God , and seruants also beside him , to whom hee made knowne the heauenly vision which hee saw , Act. 10. 7. Secondly , To enioyne them labour , and not to require more of them , then their strength will beare . The master is to rule ouer the seruant in iustice . And then is his cōmandement vniust , whē it will not stād with the course of nature , with the abilitie of his seruant , or with the word of God. Therefore he is to require labour at their hāds proportionable to their strength , & yeeld thē sometimes intercession & rest . Leuit. 25. 46. Ouer your brethen the children of Israel , ye shall not rule ouer one another with crueltie . 1. Pet. 3. 8. Bee pitifull , bee courteous , one beare with another . And for the furtherance of busines , it is conuenient that the master be oftentimes present with the seruāts in their works . Prou. 27. 23. Be diligent to know the state of thy flock , and take heed to thy heards . The good matron ouerseeth the waies of her houshold , Prou. 31. 27. A man of Libya being asked , what it was that might make a horse fat ; he answered , The masters eye . Thirdly , To recompence the diligence and paines of his seruant , and that three waies . First , by giuing him his due of meat and drinke for the present . The good matron giueth the portion to her houshold , and the ordinary to her maids , Prou. 31. 15. Secondly , by paying him his hire in the end of his seruice : The labourer is worthie of his wages . Luk. 10. 7. Well done , good seruant and faithfull ; thou hast been faithfull in little , I will make thee ruler ouer much ; enter into thy masters ioy . Mat. 25. 21. Heere three caueats are to be obserued . I. That the wages be proportionable to the work . II. That it be paid in due time , without deferring . So the Master of the vine-yard , when euen was come , called his seruants together , to giue thē their hire , Mat. 20. 8. III. That the seruāt be not defrauded of any part of his due . For this is a crying sin ; Deut. 24. 15. Thou shalt giue him his hire for his day , neither shall the Sunne go downe vpon it — lest hee crie against thee vnto the Lord , and it bee sinne vnto thee . Iam. 5. 4. Behold , the hire of the labourers which haue reaped your fields , which is kept backe by fraud , crieth , and the cries of them which haue reaped , are entred into the eares of the Lord of hosts . Thirdly , if the seruant in time of his seruice be sicke , the masters care must be by all means possible to procure his recouery . Equitie must be the rule in these cases ; and masters are to do to their seruants that which is iust and equall . Col. 4. 1. Now the seruant haplie falles sicke by and in his seruice , and his health yeelds not only profit to his master , but incouragement also to himselfe . The good Centurion in case of his seruants sicknesse , tooke the best course to haue him restored , Matth. 8. 6. CHAP. 16. Of the Seruant . THe Seruant , is a person in the family subiect vnto his master . The dutie of a seruāt is , faithfully and diligētly to demeane himselfe in the affaires of his master , and to doe seruice vnto him as vnto Christ , though he be froward and hard-harted . Titus 2. 9. Let seruants be subiect to their masters , and please them in all things , not answering againe . Ephes. 6. 5. Seruants , be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh , with feare & trembling , in singlenes of your hearts , as vnto Christ. Col. 3. 22. Thus Iacob serued Laban , Gen. 31. 38. This twentie yeares haue I bin with thee ; thine ewes and thy goates haue not cast their yong , and the rammes of the flocke haue I not eaten , &c. Contrariwise , the seruant must take heed that he doe not his masters businesse negligently , or for fashion sake , or with eye-seruice as a man-pleaser ; that in case of rebuke or controlement , he answere not againe ; lastly , that hee be trustie & withhold his hands from picking , and his heart from deceiuing his master . Seruants are of two sorts ; either free , or bond-seruants . A free-seruant is he , whom his master hireth for wages to do him seruice . To him belongs the iust paiment of his hire , and in case of offence , them master hath authoritie to censure and correct him , prouided that in the execution thereof , respect bee had vnto his age , and the correction be vsed with moderation , as if hee were his sonne . A bond-seruant , is a seruant bought for money , and is commonly called a slaue . Touching this sort , a question is moued , whether a Christian may with safe conscience , haue and vse a man as his slaue ? Answ. The power & right of hauing bond-men , in those countries where it is established by positiue lawes , may stand with good cōscience , if it be vsed with moderation . That authoritie in this behalfe is moderate , wherein these seuen caueats be obserued . I. That the master haue not ouer his seruant the power of life and death ; for this takes away the lawful power of the Magistrate , to whom only the Lord hath committed the sword of iustice . II. That there be not libertie granted him , to vse his seruant at his owne will and pleasure in all things ; for this was not granted by the law of God to his owne people : Exod. 21. 26. If a man smite his seruant or his maid in the eye , and hath perished it , he shall let him go free for his eye : Also if he smite out his seruants or his maids tooth , he shall let him go out free for his tooth . III. That the power be not enlarged to the commanding of things against piety or iustice ; for in these cases a man must rather obey God then man , Act. 4. 19. IV. That masters do not take libertie to make separation of those their seruants that be married , the one from the other , or of those that be parents from their children ; considering that God himselfe hath made these societies , and ioyned such persons together , and therefore man may not separate them . V. That the masters do not take libertie to put ouer their seruants to vngodly and vnbelieuing masters , for that is an vnkind and cruell libertie , & may be an apparāt occasion to make the seruant fall away from religion , and renounce the true God. VI. That they do not bind them to perpetuall slauery , & neuer make them free . Exo. 21. 5. But if the seruant say thus , I loue my master , my wife and my children , I will not go out free . VII . That the seruitude be not procured and retained by force ; for it is a more grieuous crime to spoile a man of his libertie , then of his riches . Now y t the same power limited with these cautions , is lawfull & warrantable in cōsciēce , it appears by these reasons . I. God hath ordained & allowed it , euen by warrant of his owne law : The posteritie of Cham was cursed by Noah , and condemned to slauerie , Gen. 9. 25. And he said , Cursed be Cham , a seruant of seruants shal he be to his brethren . So were the Gibeonites by Ioshua , Ios. 9. 23. Now therefore yee are cursed , and there shall none of you be freed from being bond-men , and hewers of wood , & drawers of water , for the house of my God. So was the theefe , Exo. 22. 3. If he had not wherewith to make restitution , then hee should bee sold for his theft . Again , those that are ouercome in war may be held captiue , and it is lawful for the conquerer to kill them , & therefore to make them slaues : and if being takē , they be saued from death , they owe all that they haue to them by whom they are saued . II. The law of God gaue libertie to any mā that would , to make sale of himselfe to another . Leuit. 25. 45. Of the children of the strangers that are soiourners among you , of them shal ye buy , & of their families that are with you , which they begat in your land , these shall be your possessiō . Deut. 15. 12. If thy brother an Hebrew sell himself to thee , or an Hebrewesse , and serue thee six yeares , euē in the seuenth yeare thou shalt let him go free from thee : and vers . 17. Thou shalt take an aule , & pierce his eare through against the doore , and he shall be thy seruant for euer . III. The mā that is ransommed frō his enemie , is bound to serue as a slaue in liew of thankfulnesse . IV. The examples of the godly in the Scriptures . Abraham had seruants whom he bought for siluer , Gen. 17. 12. Euerie manchild of eight daies old among you , shal be circumcised in your generations , as well he that is borne in thine house , as he that is bough with money of any stranger , which is not of thy seed . Gen. 24. 35. The Lord hath blessed my master Abraham wōderfully — for he hath giuen him sheep and beeues , and siluer and gold , & men-seruants and maid-seruants , and camels and asses . V. The Apostles do not disallow of such seruāts , but cōmand thē being seruants , & called to the professiō of Christianitie in that state , not to change , but to abide in their calling . 1. Cor. 7. 21. Art thou called being a seruant ? care not for it . It is alledged that such seruitude is against the law of nature . Ans. It is indeed against the law of intire nature , as it was before the fall , but against the law of corrupted nature since the fall , it is not . But Christ hath purchased liberty to belieuers , Coloss. 5. 11. Ans. Only a spirituall libertie in this life ; & a corporal only in the life to come . For though y ● seruant in regard of faith & the inner man be equal to his master , because in Christ Iesus there is neither master nor seruāt , bond nor free ; yet in regard of the outward man & ciuill order amongst men , the master is aboue the seruant , and the seruant is , & must be subiect to the master . Neuerthelesse where this kind of seruitude is abolished , it is not to be againe receiued or intertained amongst Christians , specially considering , it is a far more milde and moderate course to haue hired seruants . If it be said againe , that the Heathen Philosopher holdeth seruitude to be naturall , wherby some are by birth bond , and others free . I answere , That seruitude proceedeth not of nature , but hath his originall from the lawes of nations , and is a consequent of the fall . For all men by nature are equally & indifferētly free , none more or lesse then others . CHAP. 17. Of the Master of the familie or goodman of the house . THus much touching the diuers and seuerall combinations or couples belonging to the state Oeconomicall . Frō which do arise two persons of a mixt or compounded nature and condition , cōmonly called the Goodman , & the Goodwife of y e house . The good man or master of the familie , is a person , in whom resteth the priuate and proper gouernment of the whole houshold , and he comes not vnto it by election , as it falleth out in other states , but by the ordinance of God , setled euen in the order of nature . The husbād indeed naturally beares rule ouer the wife ; parents ouer their childrē , masters ouer their seruāts : but that person who by the prouidence of God , hath y e place of an husband , a father , a master in his house , the same also by the light of nature , hath the principality & soueraigntie therein , and he is Paterfamilias , the father and chiefe head of the familie : to him therefore the true right and power ouer all matters domestical , of right appertaineth . The duties of the master of the familie , are specially fiue . I. To beare the chiefe stroke , and to be the principal agent , directer and furtherer of the worship of God within his familie . Ios. 24. 15. I and my household wil serue the Lord. And this he doth partly by praying for & with his houshold , and partly by instructing thē in the holy Scriptures , and in the grounds of religiō , that they may grow in knowledge and reape benefit by the publike Ministerie . Thus God commanded the men of Israel to walke in their families . Deut. 6. 7. Thou shalt rehearse them continually vnto thy children , and shalt talke of them , when thou tariest in thine house , — & when thou liest downe , & when thou risest vp . Againe , vers . 20. When thy sonne shall aske thee , — what meane these testimonies , and ordināces & lawes , which the Lord our God commanded you ? Then thou shalt say vnto thy son , We were Pharaohs bondmen in Egypt , but the Lord brought vs out of Egypt , with a mightie hand . This testimony God gaue of Abraham before the law was giuen , Gen. 18. 19. For I know Abraham that he will command his sons , and his houshold after him , that they keepe the way of the Lord. And this houshold of Abraham was very large , for the holy Ghost saies long before , that he had three hundred and eighteene , * that were borne and brought vp in his house , Gen. 14. 14. It was in likelihood y e course of Salomon which he had learned of his father Dauid , and giuen for a rule to al masters of families . Prou. 4. 1. Heare O children the instruction of a father , and giue eare to learne vnderstanding — For I was my fathers sonne , deare and tender in the sight of my mother , when he taught me and said vnto me , Let thine heart hold fast my words . The company of the Disciples were the household of Christ , and he himselfe did administer all parts of the seruice of God with them and among them . Luk. 22. 15. To this purpose * Augustine saith , That the master of the familie , doth after a sort , and in his measure performe the dutie of a Churchman , or Bishop within his house . II. To bring his familie to y e Church or Congregation on the Sabbath day , to looke that they do religiously there behaue themselues , & after the publike exercises ended , & the Congregation is dismissed , to take account of that which they haue heard , that they may profit in knowledge and obedience . Act. 10. 24. The day after , they entred into Caesarea ; Now Cornelius waited for them , & had called together his kinsmen & special friends . vers . 33. Now therefore ( saith Cornelius to Peter ) are we all heere present before God , to heare all things that are commanded thee of God. Iob 1. 5. And when the daies of their banqueting were gone about , Iob sent and sanctified them , & rose vp early in the morning , & offred burnt offerings , &c. 2. King. 4. 23. And he said , wherefore wilt thou go to him to day ? It is neither new moone nor Sabbath . For this very cause the fourth Cōmandement is giuen first of all & principally to the master of the familie , that he might see the Sabbath kept , and be a principal doer in all parts of Gods worship therein . Exod. 20. 10. In it thou shalt not do any worke , thou nor thy son , nor thy daughter , thy man-seruant , nor thy maid , nor thy cattel , nor thy stranger that is within thy gates . Neither is this his care tied only to the Sabbath , but vpon other daies besides it , he ought to cause them of his houshold , as much as in him lieth , to repaire to places , where the word of God is preached . Commendable was the practise of Marie the sister of Martha , in this case , who when Christ came to her house is said , to sit at his feete and attend vnto his preaching , Luk 10. 39. III. To prouide for his family meat , drinke and clothing , and that they may liue a quiet & peaceable life , 1. Tim. 5. 8. Pro. 27. 26. The lambs are for thy clothing , and the goats for the price of thy field . v. 27. And let the milke of thy goats be sufficient for thy food , for the food of thy familie , and for the sustenance of thy maids . 1. Cor. 9. 9. Thou shalt not muzzle the mouth of the oxe , that treadeth out the corne : doth God care for oxen ? either saith he it not altogether for our sakes ? Matth. 13. 52. Euery scribe which is taught vnto the kingdome of heauen is like vnto an housholder , that brings forth out of his treasurie , things both new and old . IV. To keepe order , and to exercise discipline in his house , and that in this manner : In case of offence , when a capitall crime is committed , which incurreth publike censure ; he is not to punish it himselfe , but to bring the offender to the ciuill Magistrate , to informe of his fault , that he may haue his desert : It was a course established by the Iudicial law , which God gaue vnto Moses for his direction in causes criminall among the Israelites : Deut. 21. 18. 19. 20. If any man hath a son that is stubborne , & disobedient , which wil not hearken vnto the voice of his father , nor the voice of his mother , and they haue chastened him ; then shal his father and his mother take him , and bring him out , vnto the Elders of his citie , and vnto the gate of the place where he dwelleth , and shall say vnto the Elders of his citie ; This our son is stubborne , and disobedient , and he will not obey our admonition : hee is a rioter , and a drunkard . Againe , Deut. 13. 6. If thy brother the son of thy mother , or thine own son , or thy daughter , or the wife that lieth in thy bosome , or thy friend which is as thine owne soul , entise thee secretly saying , Let vs go and serue other gods ( which thou hast not known , thou , I say , nor thy fathers ) thou shalt not consent vnto him , nor heare , neither shal thine eye pitie , nor shew mercie , nor keepe him secret . Zach. 13. 3. And when any shall yet prophesie , his father and his mother that begate him shall say vnto him , Thou shalt not liue : for thou speakest lies in the name of the Lord : and his father , and his mother that begate him , shall thrust him thorough when he prophesieth . If the fault be of an inferiour nature , and lesser in comparison ; the master of the familie ought to proceed by priuate censure vpon the delinquent partie , sometimes by admonitiō , otherwhiles by correction , and chastisement , according to the quality of the offence , & the condition & state of the person . Leuit. 19. 17. Thou shalt plainly rebuke thy neighbour , and not suffer him to sin . Mat. 1● . 15. If thy brother sinne against thee , go and tell him his fault betweene him and thee alone : If he heare thee not , take yet with thee one or two . Prou. 29. 17. Correct thy sonne , and he will giue thee rest , and will giue pleasures to thy soule . When admonitions and corrections will not preuaile , the partie must bee brought before the Ministers , and Gouernours of the Church , that they may censure him . Matth. 18. 17. If he will not heare them , tell it vnto the Church . And the Apostle Iames giueth order that the Ministers of the Church should come to those that are sicke , and pray for them , Iames 5. 14. which if they doe in case of infirmitie ; then they are also to be sought vnto , in case of errour and offence committed , for redresse . But when none of all these meanes will do good ; if the partie be a seruant , his master may , and ought to remoue him . Psal. 101. 7. There shall no deceitfull person dwell within mine house ; he that telleth lies shall not remaine in my sight . Ioh. 8. 35. The seruant abideth not in the house for euer . V. To giue intertainment to those that are strangers , & not of the familie , if they be Christians , and Belieuers ; but specially to the Ministers of the Word . Rom. 12. 13. Giuing your selues to hospitalitie . Hebr. 13. 2. Be not forgetfull to lodge strangers : for hereby some haue receiued Angels into their houses vnawares . This duty the woman of Shunem & her husband performed vnto the Prophet Elisha , 2. King. 4. 10. Let vs make him a little chāber , I pray thee , with walles , and let vs set him a bed there , and a table , and a stoole , and a candlesticke , that he may turne in hither , when he commeth to vs. These are the duties . Heere if it be demanded , whether the master of a familie is alway , and necessarily bound in his owne person to doe all these things ? I answere , that if there be iust and necessarie cause , either in respect of his owne inabilitie , or in regard of publike imployment , vpon a lawfull calling , whereby he is hindred , so as he cannot do any of them himselfe , at some times ; it is lawfull for him to haue , and vse a deputie . This our Sauiour Christ teacheth in effect , when he saith , Who then is a faithfull seruant , and wise , whom his master hath made ruler ouer his houshold , to giue them meate in season ? Mat. 24. 25. Thus Abraham had a steward of his house , Eliezer of Damascus , Gen. 15. 2. and he performed the waightiest matters , that concerned the establishment , and continuance of Familie , not by himselfe , but by his Steward , as namely the choice of a wife for his sonne Isaak , Gen. 24. 2. Therefore Abraham said vnto his eldest seruant of his house , which had the rule ouer all that hee had ; Put now thine hand vnder my thigh , &c. Thus Pharaoh King of Egypt had Ioseph , Gen. 39. 4. So Ioseph found fauour in his sight , and serued him , and hee made him ruler of his house , and put all that he had in his hands . CHAP. 18. Of the Mistresse of the familie , or Goodwife of the house . THe Goodwife or Mistresse of the house , is a person which yeeldeth helpe and assistance in gouernmēt to the Master of the familie . For he is , as it were , the prince and chiece ruler ; she is the associate , not only in office and authoritie , but also in aduise , and counsell vnto him . 1. King. 17. 17. And after these things , the sonne of the woman , which was wife , or * mistresse of the house , was sicke . Her dutie is two-fold . First to gouerne the house , as much as concerneth her , in her place . 1. Tim. 5. 14. I will therefore that the yonger women marrie , and gouerne the house . And that she doth three waies . I. By exercising her selfe in some profitable employments , for the good of her charge , Prou. 31. 13. She seeketh wooll , and flax , and laboureth cheerefully with her hands . II. By appointing her maids their worke , and ouerseeing them therein . Vers. 15. She riseth whiles it is yet night , and giueth the portion to her houshold , and the ordinary to her maids . III. By ordering her children and seruants in wisdome ; partly by instruction , partly by admonition , whē there is need . Vers. 26. Shee openeth her mouth with wisdome , and the law of grace is in her tongue . vers . 28. Her children rise vp , and call her blessed , &c. Tit. 2. 5. That they be discreet , chast , keeping at home , &c. Act. 18. 26. Priscilla in her house , with Aquila , instructed Apollos , in that wherin he was wanting , expounding vnto him the way of God more perfectly . Gregorie Nazianzen in an Oration made for his father , saith , That his mother was not only an helper , but also a teacher or instructer , and guide vnto his father in matters of religion & godlines . The second dutie is , to giue the portion of food vnto her familie , or cause it to be giuen in due season . Prou. 31. 15. She riseth whiles it is yet night , and giueth the portiō , or meat to her houshold . Thus did Rebekah in her house . Gen. 27. 9. Get thee now to the flock , & bring me thēce two good kids of the goats , that I may make pleasant meat of thē for thy father , such as he loueth . Quest. Whether may the goodwife , without the consent of the goodman , giue and bestow the goods belonging to the familie ? Ans. I. There are some things which are proper to her selfe , and not part of her dowry which she brought vnto her husband . And these she may claime as her owne , because either they were reserued vpon the match made betweene them , or else are peculiar vnto her by their mutuall consent , and of them she may lawfully giue , without her husbands knowledge . II. The goods which are common to them both , are of another nature ; and these shee may not bestow , without his allowance , either expresse or at least general and implicite , specially when the giuing of them doth or may grow in likelihood , to the hinderance , and preiudice of the state of the familie . FINIS . Notes, typically marginal, from the original text Notes for div A09377-e130 * 〈…〉 〈…〉 Xenoph. ibid. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Cic. 3. de Nat. Deor. 1. Tim. 3. 5 Gen. 6. 12. 1. Sam. 2. 12. 23 , 24 , 25. 2. Sam. 14 33. 1. King. 5. 6. 2. Sam. 15 1. King. 1. Aristot. Politic. Xenoph. in Oecon. Psal. 128. 1 1. Tim. 4. 8 1. Cor. 7. 1. 2. 8. 9. Bellarm. de Matrim . Sacram. libr. c. 19. Concil . Trident. Sess. 24. Decreto de clandest . Matrim . Matth. 5. 32. Concil . Trid. Sess. 24. Can. 7. a See the Code in sundrie places . Lib. 5. tit . 4 de Nuptijs , tit . 5. de incesto , &c. b Concil . Trid. sess . 24. can . 12. Bellarm. de Matrim . Sacram. cap. 32. Psal. 128. 3. Act. 20. 32 Notes for div A09377-e840 * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * Diu deliberandum quod s●mel sta●uendum . * In ver●is de 〈…〉 . * In futurum . * Non de facto , de ●ure . * De praesenti . * Jn sauorem Matrimony . Rom. 1. 26 * Species . Leuit. 18 22. 23. * Ebr. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Sobriuo propior . De ciuit . Dei. lib. 1● . ca. 16. Epist●l . li. 〈◊〉 66. 1. Cor. 6. Beza de repudijs . 82. * Cuius nuptias in●re non licet , eius nec coniu●is licet . Chap. 18. * Impuberes . * Turpi . Tertul. ad vxor . li. 2. * Dilucida interualla . Gal. 4. 1. Repudium . * De honestate . Sub Innocent . 3. canon . 51. Tertul. lib. ad vxorem , 2. ad finem . * Ritè & Iure . Basil. epist. 1. ad Amphiloch . Canon , 42. Lib. 2. ad vxorem . * Oblationem sic exponit Beatus Rhenanus . Niceph. lib. 14. cap. 55. Ambros. epistolar . lib. 9. epist. 70. ad Vigilium . Ambros. in 1. Cor. 7. 15. Libr. 4. dist . 39. Lib. de Fide & operib . cap. 1● . Canon . Proposuisti , Distinct . 82. Sozomen . lib. 3. cap. 16. Sess. 8. Canon . 9. 10. Ambros. lib. de Philosoph . citat . ab August . contr . Iulianum . lib. 2. Arist. Ethic . lib. 8. In 1. Cor. 11. Homil . 26. 〈…〉 * In potestate patris . Ruffin . Eccles . hist. lib. 1. c. 14. Nazianz. epist. ad Eudoxam . * C. de Nuptijs . L. vidua , & L. in cōiunctione . * Beza de repud . & diuort . sect . de spōsalibus absque consensu parfactis . Arist. Oeconom . 7. Theodor ▪ Orat. 8. Aristot. polit . lib. 1. * [ Ethchanicau ] suos initiatos . * In Ioan. tract . 51. in fine . * [ Bagnalath babbaijth . ] Domina domus . 
A47513	----	A new family-book, or, The true interest of families being directions to parents and children, and to those who are instead of parents : shewing them their several duties, and how they may be happy in one another : together with several prayers for families and children, and graces before and after meat : to which is annexed a discourse about the right way of improving our time / by James Kirkwood ... ; with a preface, by Dr. Horneck. Kirkwood, James, 1650?-1709. 1693 Approx. 313 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 146 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2005-12 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A47513 Wing K647 ESTC R15399 12209336 ocm 12209336 56224 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A47513) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 56224) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 765:10) A new family-book, or, The true interest of families being directions to parents and children, and to those who are instead of parents : shewing them their several duties, and how they may be happy in one another : together with several prayers for families and children, and graces before and after meat : to which is annexed a discourse about the right way of improving our time / by James Kirkwood ... ; with a preface, by Dr. Horneck. Kirkwood, James, 1650?-1709. Horneck, Anthony, 1641-1697. The second editon, corrected and much enlarged. 252 p., 1 leaf of plates. Printed for J. Taylor ..., and J. Everingham ..., London : 1693. Reproduction of original in Huntington Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. EEBO-TCP is a partnership between the Universities of Michigan and Oxford and the publisher ProQuest to create accurately transcribed and encoded texts based on the image sets published by ProQuest via their Early English Books Online (EEBO) database (http://eebo.chadwyck.com). The general aim of EEBO-TCP is to encode one copy (usually the first edition) of every monographic English-language title published between 1473 and 1700 available in EEBO. 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Parent and child -- Early works to 1800. 2005-03 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2005-03 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2005-04 Judith Siefring Sampled and proofread 2005-04 Judith Siefring Text and markup reviewed and edited 2005-10 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion M Vendor ●ucht scul : Printed for J Taylor & J. Eueringham A NEW Family-Book ; OR , THE True Interest OF FAMILIES . BEING Directions to Parents and Children , and to those who are instead of Parents ; shewing them their several DUTIES , and how they may be Happy in one another . Together with several PRAYERS for Families and Children , and GRACES before and after Meat . To which is annexed a DISCOURSE about the Right Way of Improving our TIME , By JAMES KIRKWOOD Rector of Astwick in Bedfordshire . With a Preface , by Dr. Horneck . The Second Edition Corrected and much Enlarged . LONDON : Printed for J. Taylor at the Ship-in St. Paul's Church-Yard , and J. Everingham , at the Star in Ludgate-Street . 1693. To my Honoured Friend and Patron , Thomas Brown of Arlsey Esq and to Mrs. Mary Brown his Wife . ALL who have a right Sense of Things , and understand but a little of the State of Religion in the World , cannot but see and lament the great decay thereof every where amongst us . Atheism and Irreligion are become too much in fashion , and have too many Votaries and Followers . It has not been known in any Age , that such sort of Men ( or rather Monsters , for Man is too Honourable a Name for them ) have been so numerous , so daring and impudent , and so successful . Who could imagine that in a Christian State there should be such Persons , who are at great pains to propagate Atheism , and to run down , if they were able , our most Holy Religion ! As the neglect of Educating Children aright , contributes too much to this degeneracy ; so the most likely Remedy of this dangerous and spreading Distemper , is , a due care in Parents and others who have the Charge of Children , to train them up in the Knowledge , Fear , and Love of God ; To do what in them lies , to fortifie their Minds against those Snares and Temptations to which they are exposed ; and to shine before them , in the Practice of sincere Piety themselves . Tho' too many , on whom God has bestowed Children , are so far from doing their Duty for their Souls , that they corrupt and utterly ruin them , which * one of the Ancients calls a greater Cruelty , than if they killed their Bodies . Yet , blessed be God , there are some , who consider it as their main Business , with Relation to their Children , to make them wise and good , Lovers of God , and Haters of every Evil Thing . Amongst those who are governed by this Religious Principle , God hath made you , my most Honoured Friends , great Patterns . As he hath blessed you with a numerous offspring , so he hath given you of the Wisdom from above , to know how to Train them up in Piety and Virtue . The happy mixture of Kindness and Severity which you use towards them , makes them not only to stand in awe of you , but to love you . I might be allowed , on this occasion , to say somewhat in Commendation of those Excellent Qualities which God has blessed you with , and which appear not only in your way and manner of Educating your Children , but in other things likewise . The many and great Expressions of your kindness for me , ever since I had the Honour to be known to you , require the most publick Testimony of my grateful Resentment thereof . But 't is one of your Virtues , that you chuse rather to be concealed , than to make any great noise in the World. I shall therefore restrain my self from what otherwise not only Gratitude , but the great and just Esteem and Affection I have for you , do mightily tempt me unto ; And shall conclude this Address with my Prayers to God for you , That he would increase his Grace in you more and more , that you may abound in all the Fruits of Righteousness and true Holiness , until you obtain the End of your Faith , the Salvation of your Souls . I am , Tour most Affectionate Friend , and most Faithful Servant . James Kirkwood . THE PREFACE . THE Author of the ensuing Treatise , having thought fit to recommend his Papers to my perusal , I was willing to usher them into the World , with some remarks upon his pious design . The Welfare of a Common Wealth doth in a great measure depend upon the Duties of the Relatives here treated of , and did Parents and Children conscientiously discharge all the Ob●igations incumbent upon them by the Law of God , and Nature , the World could not be so wicked as it is . Education makes the first impressions upon the Souls of Men , and were care taken , that the Ground be impregnated with good Seed , such a Harvest might be expected from it , that Posterity might be the better for it . I am sensible that Conversation and the Humour of the Age , is apt to make strange alterations in the Principles we imb●be , yet something will stick , and when the thoughts are cool , and Men come to reflect , the Principles they have learned when the wax was soft , will recoil , and oblige them to return to their Duty . Of this we have experience ; and though there is no Rule so general , but admits of exceptions , yet it 's enough that this effect doth frequently appear , which is no inconsiderable Motive to the serious consideration of a thing of this importance . It was a wise answer , which one of the LXXII . Interpreters gave to Ptolemaeus Philadelphus , who asked him , what was the greatest negligence ? The neglect , saith he , of the good Education of Children . It is so , and the hurt that 's done by it , both to them , and to the Publick , is unspeakable . Whence is it that there are so many Prodigals , that so many come to an untimely end ? that so many run into excesses , which destroy both Soul and Body ? From want of pious Education . It was a severe Censure , which Carneades the Philosopher passed upon the Children of Rich Men , that they learned nothing but to ride well . Indeed it is to be wondered , that Rational Creatures should be so careful to breed up their Progeny to sensuality , and neglect the cultivation of that which makes them differ from Bruits , and shews , they are Creatures of a nobler extract : Can any thing be more reasonable , than Virtue and the fear of God ? Is not this it , which both Scripture and Philosophy teaches ? Do not we our selves confess so much , and do not most Men acknowledge it when they come to dye ? And yet that we should make this the least part of our care in the Education of Youth , is wondrous strange ! Some seem to fancy , that sending their Children to School , or to teach them their Catechism , is all the Care that is incumbent upon them . Though I cannot say , but that this is a Duty , yet it is so imperfect , that I can scarce honour it with the Title of doing it by halves , it being but the beginning , or the least part of it . Instruction , Precept , and Example are the mighty Engines and Instruments in the promoting and accomplishing this Work ; and perhaps nothing hath a greater influence than Example ; for all the Moral Precepts of the Parents , are like Water spilt upon the Ground , where Example doth not concomitate the instruction . How shall the Child learn Sobriety , where the Father is often drunk ? Or how is it possible , the young man should be meek and patient , where the Father is Cholerick , and hath no command of his passion ? I do not restrain the Grace of God , and am sensible , that the very impiety of the Parents hath sometimes contrary Effects upon certain Children , and they learn to be good by the Wickedness of their Superiors ; but this is an extraordinary Providence , which God exerts sometimes to manifest his Omnipotence , and to let Men see that he can bring light out of darkness , but the ordinary way of Edifying those under our Charge , is to teach them by Example . And though even this proves ineffectual sometimes , yet it 's enough that it is our Duty , and that we have discharged it , and have taken that way which was most rational , and of God's prescription . I am so pleased with St. Jerom's Advice to Laeta concerning the Education of her Daughter , that I cannot forbear to transcribe part of it . I will let you see , saith he , what Education you are to give to a Daughter , whose Soul ought to be the Temple of God. Let her hear nothing , learn nothing , speak nothing , but what may inspire the fear of God into her . Let her not listen to prophane Discourses , nor be enamoured with Love Songs or am●rous Ditties . Let her use her self at certain hours , to sing Psalms ; let none be about her , but sober Servants , and keep her from running into Company light and vain , where she will learn more ill than good . Use her to reading , and to work , and labour , and promise her Rewards , and incite her to Emulation ; excite her to Virtue by praises and Commendations , and make her ambitious to excel others in Virtue and good Works . Let her learn Scripture Sentences by heart , and chuse her a Master , that may not only teach her to read , but instruct her in good manners . Give her a Nurse neither debaucht nor tatling , nor given to strong Liquors ; and let her Habit be modest , and such as becomes her Christian Profession . Let her not bore Holes in her Ears for Pendants , neither let her use any Paint or Wash to beautifie her self . Let her not be nice in ordering the Hair of her Head , neither suffer her to adorn her self with Gold or Pearls , or precious Stones , except you design her for Hell fire : When she comes to riper Age , let her go with her Parents to the Temple , but let her not return to the Gayeties of the World. Advise her to keep her self in her Chamber , and let her not go to Feasts , and merry Meetings . I would not have her use too much Fasting and Abstinence , which may hurt her health , at least till she be stronger , and better able to bear it . Let her use God's Creatures for necessity , and not for voluptuousness sake . Suffer her not to be at Musical concerts , nor to be fond of Fiddles , and Lutes , and Harps , but let her repeat every day some passages out of the Word of God. Let her not go abroad any where without her Mother , nor be very familiar , or enter into intreagues with any Servant . Appoint her a Governess that 's sage and wise , and who may teach her to rise at midnight , to sing Praises to her God. Let her pray and work Day and Night . Teach her to handle her Needle , to Spin and to Exercise her self in turning the Spindle . Suffer her not to imploy her self in Imbroideries of Gold and Silver . Let her Cloaths be plain and decent , and let her eat soberly and temperately , and let her not take pleasure in common Baths . I know what will be objected here , that this is the advice of a Hermit , and to teach a Daughter how to be a Nun. But still I appeal to any unprejudiced Person , whether this be not the most likely way to Salvation , and whether these Precepts be not agreeable to the Gospel of Christ ? And though I will grant , that all are not under the same Circumstances , and all cannot give the same Education ; yet as to the principal part of the advice , which is to teach Children by Word and Example , how to die to Sin and to the World , it must be granted it 's very practicable . This Age indeed hath learnt to shake off these stricter Rules , but they should shew us too , what Warrant they have from the Word of God to do so . It was judiciously observed of Fabius , that a soft and effeminate Education , breaks the strength of Body and Mind , and whilst we breed up Children to all the Arts of Vanity and Luxury , they continue strangers to God and to themselves . The Vine grows wild , if it be not cut ; so doth Youth , if they be not betimes curbed in things which war against the Soul. Vnderstand this , ye Parents , and be instructed , ye to whom God hath committed the care of Education ; ye are God's Stewards , and your Children are the Goods you are to manage to your Master's Glory . Their blood God will require at your hands . Have not ye read the Curse God pronounced against Eli for his negligence , and are not ye afraid of the same Judgment ? Ye are the persons by whom your Children must be taught to serve God in their Generation ; ye are the persons from whom they are to learn their Duty to God and Man ; at your door the fault will lie , if they miscarry through your carelesness . Are their Souls so contemptible in your eyes , that you will let them perish for want of Admonition ? Did Christ think them worth purchasing with his own Blood , and will ye let them lie without fence or wall , or cultivation ? You take care that they may live comfortably in this World : Is it not a greater Duty to bestir your selves , that they may enjoy God for ever ? It is joy to you to see them do well here , and ought it not to be a greater joy to find , that they are like to reign with Christ and his Saints in a better World ? You love them , but how doth it appear you do , while you let their Souls die ? Is this your Love , to provide for their flesh , and to neglect enriching their better part with religious Principles ? You would have them go to Heaven when they die ; but how is it possible they should , when you are loth to be at the trouble to shew them the way that leads to that Paradise ? Was ever any Man saved without Holiness , and do you hope they will be , without this qualification ? If you teach them not by Word and Example to practise that Holiness , how can you or they hope to ascend into the Mount of God , or dwell on the everlasting Hills ? Do you believe a future Account , and do not ye enquire , whether you discharge your Duty to your Children ? Or is this no part of the Account ye are to give ? Ye are the Persons who are to breath● goodness into them , and to give them life and happiness . Ye are their Gods , as it were , and from you they receive their motion ; and their spiritual as well as their natural life must begin from you . Ye are Magistrates in your Families , and it is your Province to be a terrour to evil-doers , and Encouragers of those that do well . If by your indulgence they sin , and by your connivence they grow wicked , will not the supreme Judge be avenged on such Officers ? You blame Governours of a Commonwealth , if they do not animadvert on Offenders , or are regardless of the reins of Justice ; and do not you blame your selves , who are Commanders in your Families , for suffering the fear of God to decay there , which is the only thing that can make them happy ? How is it , that you will not understand your Interest ? Is it not your interest to educate them into the Practice of Virtue , and Goodness , and Self denial ? If they love God , they must needs love you , that love will constrain them to express their Duty to you . The Presence of God will over-awe them , and they 'll obey you , not with eye-service , but when your eye is off from them . The fear of God will make them conscientious of obeying your Commands in secret ; and if your good Counsels and Examples prevail with them , they will be not only your Children , but the Children of God ; and you will have this satisfaction , that you do not only love them , but that God loves them , and dwells in them , and they in him . Remember this , ye that are Children , and let this encourage you to a faithful discharge of your Duty . Your Parents , that under God gave you life , have a just Right to your Services and Obedience . You are born Servants to them , and to be at their beck and Command is the obligation you bring with you into the World. As the Authority of Parents was the first Government in the World , so your subjection to them is the first Service that was ever known in the World. Can you think any thing too good for them , who are the great Instruments of conveying to you all the goods you possess , and all the endowments you are invested with ? If you follow not their good Instructions and Admonitions , ye are the greatest Rebels in the World , and the sin is as great a Treason in the Family you live in , as Sedition in a Kingdom is against the State. You have the noblest Promises made you to reward your Obedience ; and though it is a natural Duty bound up with your very Being , yet God will reward it as if it were a deliberate self-denial ; and because you shall not stay for the recompence , God will bless you here , and your lives shall be comfortable on this side Heaven . It is the first Commandment in the Law with Promise ; and to let you see how God delights in your honouring your Parents , and obeying their wholsom Counsels , he hath singled out that Precept , and dress'd it with more than ordinary encouragements . But then , the Honour you shew them , must not spend it self in some outward Civilities , but must be expressed in Actions , in Speeches , and in Patience , according to the Advice of the Son of Syrach , Ecclesiastic . 3. 12 , 13 , 14. In Actions , so as to execute their lawful Commands with great alacrity and fidelity , to labour , and to take pains for their mainnteance and support , if they are fallen to decay , and to relieve their necessities , according to your ability . In Words , and Speeches , so as to speak honourably of them , to answer them with humility , to comfort them when they are in trouble , and to pacifie them with soft language , when they are angry and displeased . In Patience , so as to bear their anger patiently , and to endure their frowardness and pettishness without contradiction ; to receive their severer Commands , and such as are contrary to your genius and inclination , with gentleness , and to do them without murmuring . These are Duties which draw more than ordinary Blessings upon you , God that sees you do so , will have thoughts of peace towards you ; he will be concerned for you , and you may be confident , he will not leave you , nor forsake you . In honouring your Parents , you honour your selves . It 's that which will not only procure you favour with God , but with Men too . It 's upon this account , that Wise Men have recorded the Dutifulness of some excellent Children , and make them Immortal by their Writings ; and there are such Examples of this filial Respect , even among the Heathen , that it would be odious and dreadful , if the Children of Christians should fall short of their Duty . God lays so great a stress upon it that as he promises the kindest things to it , so he threatens as severe punishments , where it is neglected ; and that he doth not only threaten , but execute these Judgments , any Man may see , that will take notice of his Providences . But all this the Reader will be more fully convinced of , by reading the following Discourse , which , that God may bless with success and edification , shall be my hearty Prayer . A. Horneck . THE CONTENTS Of Advice to Parents . PART I. THE Introduction , shewing the great Importance of the right Education of Children . Pag. 1 How Parents ought to be affected , while Children are yet in the Womb. 2 How they ought to be affected when their Children are born . 3 The Duties of Parents for their Childrens Souls . 1. Duty , To Consecrate them to God in Baptism . 4 The Right of Children to Baptism . 8 2. Duty , to season their Minds betimes with good Impressions . 13 Children are to be acquainted with Scripture Histories . 14 3. Duty , to teach them to pray . 18 4. Duty , to observe carefully their Temper and Disposition , and to endeavour to reform what is amiss therein . 22 What is to be done if they are sturdy and proud . 22 If they be given to lying . 23 If they are Cunning and Deceitful . 24 If they are peevish and passionate . 25 If they are Revengeful and Malicious . 26 If they are Jealous and Suspicious . 28 If they are too Credulous . 28 If they are Envious . 29 If they are very Impatient 30 If they love their Belly too well . 32 If they discover any tendency to Vnchast and Immodest actions . 33 If they are very Changeable and Vnconstant . 36 If they are surly and morose . 37 If they are disrespectful to Aged Persons . 39 If they quarrel much with one another . 40 If they are over curious to know their Lot and Fortune in the World. 42 If they are unthankful to those who do them good and kind Offices . 46 If they are of too Prodigal a Temper . 49 If they are Covetous . 50 If they are naturally melancholly . 51 If they are of too gay and airy a Temper . 51 If they are Rash and Froward . 52 5. Duty , to see that they be taught to Read. 55 About keeping them at School . 56 Great care ought to be taken , what Books they read . 61 6. Duty , to bring them to the place of publick Worship , so soon as they are fit for it . 64 What they should do before they go to Church . 65 How they should carry themselves at Church . ib. What they should do when they come from Church . 66 Why the Lord's Day ought to be kept . 67 Children are to be possessed with a great regard for the Ministers of the Gospel . 68 7. Duty , to make them understand their Baptismal Covenant . 73 8. Duty , to encourage them to come to the Lord's Table . 77 9. Duty , to take care that they accustom themselves to self-Examination . 79 10. Duty , to observe what Providences they meet with , and to acquaint them therewith in due time , as also with some of the most remarkable Providences , which either they ( to wit the Parents ) themselves , or others have met with . 86 Some Directions to Parents , how to render their Endeavours effectual . 95 1. They must give their Children good Example . 95 2. They must chuse good Company for them . 98 The great Danger that Children are in from Flatterers . 99 Advice to those who send their Children abroad to travel . 102 3. They must , as need requires , reprove and chasten their Children , and how ? 106 Parents ought in correcting their Children , to follow the Example of our Heavenly Father . 111 Parents must be careful not to oppose one another , when they correct and reprove their Children . 112 4. They must carefully improve the Time of their Childrens Sickness , or of any other Afflictions they meet with , towards the making of them wiser and better . 113 5. They must daily pray to God for them . 115 Against those who curse their Children . 118 Some Motives to excite Parents to do these things . 1. Motive from the Divine Command . 120 2. Motive , from its being a work worthy of the utmost care and pains of Parents . 122 3. Motive , from the Rewards which attend those , who faithfully do these things . 123 4. Motive , from the great Benefit which comes both to Church and State by the good Education of Children . 127 5. Motive , from the sad Effects which attend the neglect of these Duties . 135 PART II. The Duties of Parents as to their Childrens Bodies . 1. DVty , it belongs to the Mother to give suck to her Children . 141 2. Duty , about Childrens Diet. 145 3. Duty , about Childrens Apparel . 146 The Duty of Parents as to the outward Estate of their Children . 1. Duty , to chuse a fit Trade for them . 148 Advice to those who have great Estates and Riches , to bestow on their Children . 150 Advice to those , who intend to set apart one or more of their Children for the Holy Ministry . 157 2. Duty , about disposing of them in Marriage . 162 The sad Effects of Marrying very leud and profligate Persons . 164 3. Duty , about providing somewhat that may be the foundation of their comfortable subsistance in the World. 167 Great Prudence and Caution ought to be used in bestowing their Worldly Goods on their Children . 172 4. Duty , to have their Will and Testament in Readiness . 174 The great Inconvenience of delay in this matter . 174 Great care to be taken in the choice of Guardians for Children . 178 The above mentioned particulars earnestly recommended to Parents . 180 Concerning the Duty of Parents when God removeth their Children by Death . 1. They ought to consider that it is the Lord who does it . 187 2. They ought to consider that their Children were born mortal . 189 3. They should consider from whence , and whither they are gone . 197 4. They should consider that there will be a Resurrection . 202 5. They should consider that their giving way to excessive Grief and Mourning , can do no good , but will certainly do a great deal of hurt . 205 The Duty of Parents on their Death-Bed . 209 1. Duty , to give their Children good Advice . 210 2. Duty , to pray to God for them . 212 3. Duty , to commend them to some Faithful Friends . 212 Concerning the Duties of Step-Fathers and Step-Mothers . 214 Some Motives to stir them up to do their Duty . 218 The Duties of Guardians . 223 Some Motives to excite Guardians to do their Duty . 225 A Morning Prayer for Parents , or Masters of Families , with their Family . 232 An Evening Prayer for Parents , or Masters of Families , with their Family . 237 A short Prayer for the Morning or Evening , when through Extraordinary Occasions there is not time for the other . 242 A Prayer to be taught Children , when hey begin to speak . 245 A Prayer for Children when they come to be four or five Years old . 246 A Prayer for Children , when they come to twelve or fourteen years of Age ; sooner or later , according to the ripeness of their understanding . 247 Grace before Meat . 251 After Meat . 252 ERRATA . PAg. 16. line 26. read intelligible . p. 22. l. 22. for when , r. whom . p. 44. l. 9. r. infallibly . p. 45. l. 2. for having , r. have . p. 68. l. 22. r. Ministrations . p. 87. l. 24. r. stir up . p. 97. l. 22. r. And besides the influence . p. 101. l. 21. r. Attia . p. 126. l. 12 r. lustre p. 154. l. 1. r. of . p. 159. l. 13. point thus ; early and late , to be . p. 178. l. 7. for are , r. is . p. 187. l. 25. point thus ; sees fit . He is the great Potter , and. p. 193. l. 28. for hath , r. had . p. 215. l. 1 , point thus ; account : They. p. 238. l. 4. point thus ; Counsels , and despised . As to some other mistakes in the Printing , they will not much hinder the Reader . ERRATA in Advice to Children . PAg. 3. l. 18. r. Disposition . p. 9. l. 12 and 13. r. tho Canaan . l. 29. for ye , r. thee . p. 29. l. 16. for Cat , r. Cock. p. 114. l. 5. r. Servant . p. 139. l. 4. r. hath called . p. 150. l. 15. and 16. r. according . ADVICE TO PARENTS . PART I. IT has been always reckoned by the best and Wisest men , a thing absolutely necessary towards a Reformation in the World , to begin with the Instruction and Education of Children ; those of elder Years being ordinarily so rooted and hardned in their sinful habits , that , for the most part , there 's very little can be done to reform them , and make them better . So sensible were some ancient States of this , that they made particular Laws for Educating Children ; thinking it too great a Trust , to leave it altogether in the Power of Parents , to train up their Children according to their Humour and Fancy . Amongst Christians , there are few restraints upon Parents ; in most Countries it being in their Power to Educate their Children as they think good : It is therefore of no small Importance for them to know what their Duty is , that they may approve themselves to God , in doing whatever he requires towards their Children , for their Souls , their Bodies , and their outward Estate . The Design of this Treatise , is , to furnish those , who want such helps , with some plain and easie Directions , that they may know how to act the Part of Christian Parents . First , while Children are yet in the Womb , it is the Duty of Parents , to endeavour to bring their mind to an indifferency , as to the Sex which shall be born ; not to prescribe to God , by their impatient desires , and their bold asking of him , a Child of this or that Sex ; but to leave it entirely to his Will and Pleasure , to do what he thinks best . The happiness of Parents does not consist in having Children of this or that Sex : Sometimes Sons ( who are most desired ordinarily ) may prove useless in the World , yea very hurtful in many regards ; they may occasion great grief of Heart , and lasting Anguish and Vexation to their Parents , by their mad and foolish Courses , and wicked doings : And on the other hand , Daughters may prove great Blessings in the World , great Comforts to their Parents , and great Examples of Piety and of Zeal for the honour of God : On which accounts Parents ought to resign their will to God , and be ready with all gratitude to accept whatever he bestows . Secondly , When a Child is born , Parents ought with all thankfulness to return Praise to God , who hath bestowed such a blessing upon them , giving them a living Child , sound and perfect in all its parts and proportions , without either defect of necessary parts , or excess and deformity thereof . They ought to admire and adore the Powerful and Wise Providence of God , which appears in framing and fashioning their Infant , so curiously and wonderfully in the Womb ; in preserving it , and making it grow up from a very small and imperfect beginning , to such a bigness , with all those comely shapes and proportions which they behold ; and at last in bringing it safely from the Womb , which is one of the great and wonderful Works of the Power and Goodness of God ; tho it be little regarded , because it is so common . They ought to look upon their Children as given them of God , to be taken care of both as to their Souls and Bodies ; to be bred up in his fear , for his Honour and Glory ; to be made fit to serve him here , and to live with him for ever hereafter . The Soul being the chiefest part o● the Charge committed to Parents , ● shall first shew what they ought to d● for their Childrens Souls . The first Duty of Parents for the Souls of their Children , is , to Consecrat● them to God in Baptism . First , They ought to Consecrate their Children to God in Baptism , so soon as conveniently they can : They cannot better express their gratitude to God for blessing them with Children , than by presenting them to him again in this holy Ordinance ; that he may set his Seal upon them , and admit them into his House and Family ; that he may bestow upon them the Priviledges of his Children , and give them a Right and Title to the Blessedness , the Grace and Glory purchased by Jesus Christ. It is for this End that Baptism is instituted ; not only to be a Ceremony of Admission into the Church , but to Seal unto us the Pardon of our Sins , to assure us of the Divine Favour , to make us Members of Christ , Heirs of God , and Inheritours of the Kingdom of Heaven , if we by wilful impenitency and unbelief , do not afterwards hinder and frustrate the Virtue thereof . It is not necessary for Parents to enquire how such things are done by Baptism ; it is enough for them to know , That God hath appointed Baptism for those Ends , and we are sure that He appoints nothing in vain : Our Saviour is said , Eph. 5. 26. To sanctify and cleanse his Church with the washing of Water by the Word . And , Tit. 3. 5. he is said to save us by the washing of Regeneration , and renewing of the Holy Ghost . And in the 22 d. of the Acts and the 16. it is said by Ananias unto Paul , Arise and ●e Baptized , and wash away thy Sins : And St. Peter , having spoken of Noahs being saved with his Family in the Ark , he adds , 1 Epist. 3 21. The like Figure whereunto , even Baptism doth now also save us . And St. Paul tells us , 1 Cor. 12. 12 , 13. For as the Body is one , and hath many members , and all the members of that one Body , being many , are one Body ; So also is Christ. For by one Spirit are we all Baptized into one Body . And Gal. 3. 26 , 27. He saith , For ye are all the Children of God by Faith in Christ Jesus . For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ , have put on Christ : Which words import not only our owning and acknowledging him as the Saviour of the World , who alone is able to wash and cleanse us with his Blood , but also our Professing our resolution to live holy lives , to walk in newness of life according to his Example ; in token of which in the Ancient Church , they who were baptized , were presently cloathed with White Rayment , to testify their resolution to live in holiness , and to put off the Old man , that is , all their former Wicked deeds and Customs , and filthy Practices . Likewise , Rom. 6. 3 , and 4. it is thus written , Know ye not that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ , were baptized into his Death ? Therefore we are buried with him by Baptism into Death , that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the Glory of the Father ; even so we also should walk in newness of Life . These words import not only our belief of a Crucified Saviour , who dyed and was buried for sin , to save us from it ; but also our Repentance , whereby we renounce Sin , as dead and buried to it for the time to come . The general Design of this Sacrament , being sufficiently plain and clear from these and other Scriptures ; it is to little purpose , ( and oftentimes it proves to very ill purpose ) to enquire any further as to particulars ; for by so doing , a great many persons judging of Divine things by their own weak and foolish apprehensions , have reasoned themselves ( if I may so speak ) both out of their Reason and Religion . As to the Right of Children to Baptism , It will appear , if you Consider , that the Covenant Blessing of God's being the God of Abraham and of his Seed , Gen. 17. 7. is not only continued , to those of the Jewish Nation who are converted to Christianity , ( for if the first Fruit be holy , the Lump is Holy ; and if the Root be Holy , so are the Branches , Rom. 11. 16. ) but is likewise extended to the Gentiles , who by Faith in Christ are made one Body with the Jews , and so have a Right to the Blessings promised to Abraham and to His Children Rom. 4. 9 , 10 , 11 , 12. Cometh this blessedness upon the Circumcision onely , or upon the uncircumcision also ? For we say , that Faith was reckoned to Abraham for Righteousness . How was it then reckoned ? When he was in Circumcision , or in uncircumcision ? Not in Circumcision , but in uncircumcision ? And he received the sign of Circumcision , a Seal of the Righteousness of the Faith , which he had yet being uncircumcised : That He might be the Father of them that believe , tho they be not Circumcised , that Righteousness might be imputed unto them also : And the Father of Circumcision , to them who are not of the Circumcision only , but also walk in the Steps of that Faith of our Father Abraham , which he had being yet uncircumcised . From which Words it appears , That all who believe , not only Jews or Persons Circumcised , but Gentiles also , or Persons uncircumcised , are accounted the Children of Abraham , and capable to partake of that Happiness and Salvation , which was Promised to him as the Father of the Faithful . To the same purpose saith the Apostle , writing to the Galatians , Chap. 3. 9. They which be of Faith , are blessed with Faithful Abraham . And v. 29. If ye be Christ's , then are ye Abraham 's Seed , and Heirs according to the Promise . Again , 1 Cor. 7. 14. he saith , The unbelieving Husband is Sanctified by the Wife , and the unbelieving Wife is Sanctified by the Husband : Else were your Children unclean , but now are they Holy. Which intimates , that the Children of all Believers , whether they be Jews or Gentiles , are within God's Covenant , and have a Right to those Favours and Priviledges which he hath annexed thereto . Likewise , Acts 2. 39. 't is said , The Promise is unto you , and to your Children , and to all that are afar off , even as many as the Lord our God shall call . So that , all who are called by the Preaching of the Gospel , and do believe in the Lord Jesus , are both themselves and their Children within the Covenant of Grace . If it were not so , Then the Blessing of Abraham , were not come on the Gentiles , through Jesus Christ , as it affirmed , Gal. 3. 14. For how could the same Blessing be come on the Gentiles ; if their Children were not comprehended within the Covenant of Grace , which was a part of the Blessing of Abraham ? And how could Christians be Heirs according to the Promise , if their Children have no Right to it , as Abraham's Children had ? Or can it be imagined , that the Condition of Believers under the Gospel , is worse than the Condition of those who believed under the Law ? Are God's Mercies and Favours to Mankind impaired , by Christ's coming into the World ? Has the great Lover of Souls , the Redeemer of the World , been the occasion of our loseing great and considerable Priviledges , by his Tabernacling amongst us ? And yet all this must needs follow , if now under the Gospel the Children of Believers are excluded from the Covenant of Grace , which they were admitted to under the Law ; which is very inconsistent with the Divine Goodness , and contrary to the Love of our Lord Jesus , which he manifested in his Blessed Gospel ; where we find , he Commanded the Children to be brought unto him , and blamed those who would have kept them from him ; He took them into his Arms , laid his Hands upon them , and Blessed them , and declared that he accounted them Heirs of the Kingdom of Heaven . Mat. 19. 13 , 14 , 15. and Mark 10. 13 , 14 , 15. 16. From all which , both Words and Deeds of our Saviour , we may see very plainly , he was far from hindering their being admitted Members of his Church and Kingdom . The Right of Infants to Baptism will further appear , if you consider more particularly the Institution of Baptism . The Jews were wont to admit into their Church , not only Aged Persons who were converted to Paganism , but likewise their Children , which they did by Circumcision , Sacrifice , and Baptism . Our Saviour being to determine the manner of admitting Disciples and Proselytes into his Church that he might make his Yoke : easie to those who would come after him , laid aside Circumcision , ( which was a painful Rite ) and Sacrifices , ( which were very Costly ) and only retained Baptism , to be the Sacrament of Initiation or Admission of Disciples into his Church . Go ye , said he to his Apostles , Mat. 28. 19. and teach ( or , as the Words may be Translated , Disciple or make Disciples of ) all Nations , Baptizing them in the Name of the Father , and of the Son , and of the Holy Ghost . Now , this Command being given to Men , who knew that the Infants of those who were Converted , were admitted into the Jewish Church , as well as the Parents themselves , is there the least Ground to imagine any other , but that our Saviour's Design was , that the Children of Believers should still be admitted into his Church , as well as formerly into the Jewish ? And no doubt , if he had thought fit to discontinue the Jewish Practice , he would have expresly signified his Mind about it , to prevent an otherwise unavoidable mistake . To all which might be added , that the Catholick or Universal Church , not only at this Day , but in former Ages , has observed this Custom , of Baptizing the Children of Christian Parents . Now , if Children have so good a Right to Baptism , what shall be said of those Parents , who ●light and neglect it , and so deprive their poor Children of that which God , their Heavenly Father , hath ordained for so great and excellent purposes ? We see how careful Parents are , if their Children have a Title to Houses and Lands , or other Temporal Things , to use their utmost Endeavours , to make their Title as sure unto them as is possible . And yet how sad is it to think , that they are not at all careful , to have their Children Baptized , tho' God has appointed this Sacrament , to be the Seal of his Covenant , and an Evidence of that Right which Believers and their Children have to the Kingdom of Heaven . 2. Duty , to feason their Minds betimes with good Impressions . Secondly , When Children begin to speak and to discover some dawnings of Reason , it is fit to season their Minds with some good Thoughts , with some divine Impressions , that Religion betimes may catch hold of their tender and innocent Minds , before they are corrupted and defiled with bad Principles , and vain and unreasonable Opinions , which they are apt to learn too soon from evil Company . Teach them who made them ; who dyed for them ; for what end they were made ; whither good Children go when they dye , and whither naughty Children go ; what a place Heaven is , and Hell , &c. Amongst other Things , 't will be very useful to tell Children , some of the most remarkable Histories in Scripture , as so many Arguments and Motives to excite them to be good Children , and to avoid all wicked and naughty Courses : For Example , tell them the Story of the Deluge , how God punished the Old World , because they were wicked , but saved Noah . Thereby take occasion , to shew them the Danger of being wicked ; that sinning with Company , will not preserve from Punishment ; what a Happy thing it is to be good ; and how kind the Lord is to such who keep his Commandments , as Noah did . To this purpose tell them also the Story of Sodom and Gomorrah , &c. How those Cities were consumed by Fire from Heaven , for their great Wickedness ; and how Lot was preserved from that dreadful Destruction . Tell them the History of David and Goliah , that they may learn not to be proud of their Strength , but may put their Trust in God , who is able to save them from their mightiest Enemies . Tell them the Story of the naughty Children at Bethel , how they mocked the Old Prophet Elijah , and how 42 of them were torn in pieces by two Bears . By this Example shew them , what a dangerous thing it is to be in the Company of naughty Children ; and what an Evil thing it is to be Mockers and Scorners , especially of Holy Men , of Aged Persons , or of God's Ministers . Tell them what happened to Ananias and Saphira for their lying ; that they may be afraid to lye . Tell them how Daniel was preserved , when he was cast into the Den of Lions : And how the three Children were preserved in the Fiery Furnace . That thereby they may learn , never to be afraid to do the Will of God , tho' by doing it they should be exposed to never so great Dangers . Tell them how Daniel , Hananiah , Mishacl and Azariah chose to eat Pulse only , and to drink Water , and yet , by the Blessing of God on their plain Diet , Their Countenances appeared fairer and fatter in Flesh , than all the Children that did ●at the Portion of the King's Meat . That thereby they may learn to be well pleased with the most Plain and Ordinary Fare , and may consider that the Blessing of God is able to make the coursest Diet very sweet , Refreshing and Nourishing , even beyond the greatest Delicacies . In this manner 't is sit to entertain your Children sometimes , according to their Age and Capacity , with such Scripture Histories , as tend to make the most lively Impressions upon them . In teaching Children such matters , it is necessary to condescend to their weak Capacity , to speak to them softly and gently , and in a plain and intellgible manner . It is not fit to talk with them of such things at all times , nor yet to say too much to them at any one time : Such Instructions are to be dropt into their Minds leisurely and by degrees , so as not to oppress them , but to recreate them ; not to be a Burden to them , but a Pleasure . It cannot be expressed how great Advantages attend such early Instructions ; these are the Seeds of Virtue , which take root infensibly , and spring up sometimes very unexpectedly ; the Impressions which they make continue a great while , as Earthen Vessels retain the favour of that Liquor which was first put into them a long time after : So powerful are these f●r●t Instructions , that they are able to conq●●r even Nature it self . † The famous Lycurgus made this appear , by bringing into the Market-place two Dogs of one Litter , and presenting before them a Pot of Pottage and a Hare ; one of them ( which was trained up in Hunting ) run after the Hare ; and the other ( which was brought up in the House ) sell to the Pottage . What a wonderful power may we daily observe in those early impressions which are made on Mens Minds ? Thereby in comes to pass , that the most abs●●d and extravagant Opinions , which have been suck'd in , when one was young , can hardly be removed by the clearest and strongest Reasonings . 3. Duty , to teach them to pray . Thirdly , Teach them , so soon as may be , to pray to God Morning and Evening ; To say after you , or others whom you appoint for that purpose , two or three short Petitions , which are easie to be understood ; and as their Understanding and Capacity increaseth , teach them the Lord's Prayer ; and after that some larger Form of Prayer , which they may say after you , till they can read it themselves , or get it by heart . You are to have a special care , that they perform their Devotions in as grave and serious a manner as their years can admit : You are to keep them from all sorts of indecent Actions and Postures , when they say their Prayers : For this end , you are to teach them who it is they speak to when they pray , and what those things mean , which the pray for . Chuse the sittest times for them , wherein to say their Prayers : As in the Morning , when-ever they arise ; while their Spirits are most vigorous , and their Thoughts most free . At Night let them say their Prayers rather before Supper than after ; because after Supper , they are more apt to be very dull and sleepy , and thereby less fit for such a performance . God is not to be served with the refuse of our Thoughts , and with sluggish sleepy Desires ; but with our best and most lively Affections , and with the strength and fervour of our desires . You are to prevent their omitting their Prayers at any one time ; because doing so once or twice , they are apt to neglect them wholly , or to return to them with great aversness : Whereas Custom and Constancy in performing their Devotions , will make them much more easie and pleasant to them . When they are possessed with more perfect and solid thoughts about Religion , with stronger and more lively impressions of Divine things , and are able without great difficulty to express the sense of their Souls ; They may do what they find serves best the great purposes of Devotion : If praying without restraining themselves to any particular Form of Words , contribute more to their Fervency and Elevation of Mind in Prayer , let them pray without using a Form : But , if they find that their Minds are more stayed and fixed , and their Fervency and Devotion greater in the use of a Form than without it , let them do that which they find best . When they pray for outward and temporal things , teach them to do it with an entire submission to the Will of God , who hath promised perishing things conditionally , that is , so far as he sees the bestowing of them will be for his Glory , and the good of his Children : Therefore they must not be peremptory , vehement , and importunate in their desires and Prayers for such things , but ought to pray for them with great Humility and Resignation to the Divine Will. As for spiritual Blessings , to wit , the pardon of Sin , the direction and assistance of the Spirit of God , his Grace to help them in time of need , power and strength to fight against the Devil , the World , and the Flesh , &c. These things are to be prayed for with all the importunity and earnestness that is possible . The more vehement and fervent their desires and Prayers are for such things , the more acceptable are they to God , and the more likely to obtain from him the desires of their Souls ; for he hath promised , to satisfie the longing Soul with good things . As it is the Duty of Parents to teach their Children to pray Morning and Evening , so they ought to teach them , always to bless God before and after Meals . You ought at first , when they begin to speak , to cause them to say after you , or after those who attend them , two or three words , before and after Meat . And when they come to greater Capacity , teach them a larger Form. This will , in due time , be a means to excite in their Minds a Sense of the power and goodness of God , of their dependance upon him for all needful things , both for Soul and Body , and of their own weakness and indigence . 4. Duty , to observe carefully their temper and disposition , and to endeavour to reform what is amiss therein . Fourthly , Observe carefully their Temper and Disposition , what Vices they are most inclined to ; If they are sturdy and proud , peevish and passionate , Malicious and Revengeful , False and Deceitful , rash and unadvised , &c. Endeavour , all you can , to reform them , and to bend their Minds the right way . For Example , If they are sturdy and proud , strive to humble them , to break them , to tame their proud Spirits ; accustom them to the doing Acts of Humility ; do not gratifie them in those things which are apt to make them Proud ; cause them to yield and submit to your Will , or to the Will of others whom you think fit they should obey . Accustom them , now and then , to a refusal of what they would have , especially when you see them too eager to have it . This you may do in small matters , which they may be without very safely : By which means you will prepare them to bear with a refusal in things of greater moment , ( which are either inconvenient for them to have , or for you to give ) and to be willing to have them , or want them , as you shall think fit . If once this Foundation is laid , it will make the rest of your work a great deal more easie , in the Education of your Children . If you once take their will from them , you may then do with them what you please . But if , instead of this , you gratifie them in whatever they have a mind to , and suffer them to live according to their own Will and Humour , whether it be right or wrong , you may then expect , that when they are grown up , they will improve to their own hurt and your grief , the Excessive Liberty they had when they were young . As then you left them to do their own will , so now they will do it , whether you will or not . If they be given to Lying , shew them the Evil of it , that a Lying Tongue is an Abomination to the Lord , Prov. 6. 16 , 17. and Ch. 12. 22. That the Devil is the Father of Lyars ; and that they are in the Number of those that are shut out of the new Jerusalem , and have their part in the Lake that burneth with Fire and Brimstone , Rev. 21. 8. and 22. 15. Shew them how great hurt it will do them , and what shame it will bring upon them ; That if they be found Lyars , People will not believe them , even when they speak Truth . Encourage them to confess their Faults , if they have done any thing amiss ; be apt to pardon them when they confess , and tell the Truth ; and commend them for doing so : But if you find them in a Lye , be sure to Chastise them for it , especially if they have done it oftner than once . Nothing tends more to the spoiling of Children , than their getting into such a habit : This is a Vice that grows up apace , if not timely cured by good Education ; Thereby they learn to grow so false and disingenuous , that they are not fit to be trusted or employed . If you observe them to be Cunning , and full of little Arts and Wiles , to deceive those who are simple and good natur'd ; strive to temper this Wisdom of the Serpent , with the Harmlesness and Innocence of the Dove . Teach them to use their Wisdom , in doing their Duty as well as they can ; in carrying on such good and useful Designs , as are suitable to their Age ; and in taking heed lest others deceive them . Endeavour to make them understand , that Golden Rule , which our Saviour gives us , Mat. 7. 12. All things whatsoever you would that Men should do to you , do ye even so to them . Shew them , that , at last , Honesty will be found to be the best policy . That they that walk uprightly , walk surely . Prov. 10. 9. That God will be a Buckler to them that walk uprightly , ( Prov. 2. 7. ) That is , he will protect such Persons , and save them from Mischief and Destruction . Endeavour , all that is possible , to make them Lovers of Sincerity and of Godly simplicity ; and strive to possess them with a just abhorrence of any thing that looks like cheating and deceiving . If they are of a peevish and passionate Temper , easily put out of Humour with every little thing , and apt to fly out into Passion for a small matter ; endeavour to make them of a calm and mild Temper , Meek and Gentle , and of a well governed and composed Spirit . Teach them to bridle their Passion , to restrain the inward boyling of their Anger , and not to suffer it to break forth into indecent Words and Actions . Shew them , what an excellent thing it is , for one to rule his Spirit , which , Solomon says , is better than to take a City , Prov. 16. 32. Shew them , what sad consequences attend an unruly Passion ; and what mad and foolish things some have done , when they were angry . 'T will not be amiss , to take occasion to shew them , how one looks , and what he does , when he is transported by his Passion ; and endeavour thereby , to possess them with a great abhorrence of this Vice , which renders those who are guilty of it , such sad and deformed spectacles . Often suggest to them the Example of our Blessed Master ; who , when he was reviled , reviled not again ; who , endured the contradiction of Sinners against himself ; and who commanded us , to learn of him , who was meek and lowly , Mat. 11. 29. If you perceive them to be Naturally very Revengeful and Malicious , ready to do all manner of mischief to those , who have cross'd them or vex'd them in any thing ; endeavour all that you can , to deliver them from so woful and unhappy a Temper ; and to make them love those , who have done or said somewhat that was uneasie to them , and to embrace all occasions of doing them kind Offices , that so they may learn to overcome evil with good . Do not encourage them to say ill of those , who have said ill of them ; for this were to feed and cherrish their Revengeful Humour . Shew them the Example of our Blessed Saviour , who Loved his Enemies , yea Died for them ; and requires of all his Followers , to love their Enemies . Shew them , what a Noble Victory it is over an Enemy , to overcome him with the Weapons of Kindness , by doing him good Offices ; and what happy effects attend this Christian Temper . Acquaint them likewise , with the many sad consequences of Revenge , whereby such Persons who give way thereto , seldom fail to bring upon themselves , if not their whole Family , utter Ruin and Destruction . Parents ought so much the more , to strive to beget a mighty Sense of this Duty upon their Childrens minds , because it seems , most of all other thing to be neglected by the generality 〈◊〉 Christians . If you find your Ch●●dren apt to be very Jealo●● and Suspicious , endeavo● to free them from so bad Temper , which will lay the foundatio● of perpetual uneasiness and disquiet , 〈◊〉 it be not speedily cured . Strive 〈◊〉 make them think favourably , and 〈◊〉 hope and believe the best of ever●●body . Shew them , how much bett● it is , to be mistaken often in their f●●vourable construction , than to jud● amiss of any body , tho' but once ; th● this is a Sin , which the other is not . But tho' Parents oug● thus , to endeavour to fr● their Children from th● Jealous and Uncharitable Temper , y● care must be taken , that they be n● too credulous , apt to believe whateve● is spoken , without any regard to th● Authority and Credibility , the Trut● and Sincerity of the Speaker : For , 〈◊〉 being of such a Temper as this , th● are in danger perpetually of being imposed upon , and betrayed to a gre● many inconveniences , both in the● Words and Actions : Any body who has but Wit enough , to find out their Temper , may very easily make a prey of them , and by false Relations , and cunning Insinuations , may occasion their saying and doing a great many things , very hurtful to themselves or others , or at least very silly and impertinent , which will expose them to a great deal of Contempt and Scorn . Parents therefore , ought to look upon it as a matter of no small importance , to preserve their Children from being too credulous ; they ought to Teach them to enquire into the Truth of what is spoken , and to consider who the Person is that speaketh . For if it be manifest , that he who speaketh , is ordinarily given to Lying , and that he makes no Conscience of his words ; it is so far from being a fault , not to believe him ; that , on the contrary , 't is a piece of very great silliness , to make any account of what he says , until it be confirmed by Persons of known Truth , and of unquestioned Integrity . If they are of an Envious Temper , and cannot endure that others be Loved as well as they , or that others should have better and fine things than they , or ev'n as good : Endeavour to cure them of this Distemper , by all such Arguments and Methods , as their years are capable of Shew them how great mischief thei● Envy does them ; how it robs them o● the Happiness and Comfort of their Lives , and eats out all that Sweetness and Pleasure they might otherwise ta●● in what they enjoy . Shew them , what a foolish thing their Envy is ; it cannot affect or hurt others , it only hurt● themselves , which it does with a witness ; for , as Solomon says , Prov. 14. 30. Envy is the rottenness of the bones ; That is , it wasts and consumes to the very Bones , those who entertain so unlucky a Guest ; it makes their Life most miserable . If you perceive them to be very impatient , when they have not presently what they desire , or when any uneasie thing happeneth unto them ; for example , when their Head akes a little , or when any other part of their Body is affected , more or less , with somewhat that is painful and smarting , &c. Endeavour to make them of a patient Spirit ; teach them to bear their burthen without much complaining or making an indecent noise . Make them sensible , that all those things , which are so painful and afflictive to them , are order'd by the wise and just Providence of God , to try them , to humble them , to raise their Hearts to Heaven , to purifie them from their dross , to prepare them for greater sufferings , to stir them up to call upon him , and to learn to depend upon him , and to resign themselves entirely to his Holy Will and Pleasure . Shew them , that whatever they suffer , is far less than they deserve ; that a great many Excellent and Holy Persons , have endured much more severe things without complaining or murmuring ; yea , that ev'n some Heathens have , with great firmness and constancy of mind , endured a great deal of pain and torture . Above all , suggest unto them , what our Blessed Lord and Master suffered , in his Soul , and in his Body ; and how , for our sakes , he endured all with wonderful patience , and with an entire submission to the will of his Father ; How , He was led as a sheep to the slaughter ; How , He was oppressed and afflicted , and yet opened not his mouth . Shew the● , how it becometh them , who by Profession are Christ's followers , to run with patience the race set before them , looking unto Jesus . Encourage them also , with the hopes of an exceeding and eternal weight of Glory , which attends those who endure these ligh● Afflictions which last but for a moment . If you see that they love their Belly too well , and are apt to Eat and Drink more than is meet , and that they are too desirous of such food as is most costly and chargeable ; endeavour to restrain their Gluttonous Appetite , and to keep them within the bounds of Moderation and Sobriety ; * Teach them , to be well pleased with plain and ordinary fare ; to consider , that any thing , tho' never so course , is better than they deserve ; that a great many excellent Persons have been reduced to such straits , as to think it a Feast , to have enough of Bread and Water . Tell them , how meanly a great many People , both Young and Old , live at this very instant ; and therefore , that they ought to be content with such Food as is provided for them , to use it soberly , and to be heartily thankful to God , from whom they have Meat and Drink , and all other things , which are for the comfort and conveniency of their Lives . If you observe in them any thing that looks like a tendency to an Unchaste Behaviour , delay not to admonish them ; shew them the evil of such things , and the dreadful consequences thereof , both to Soul and Body . Endeavour to prevent their falling into so horrible a pit , out of which very few escape , who have once fal'n thereinto ; and of which , the Wiseman says , Prov. 22. 14. He that is abhorred of the Lord , shall fall therein ; and again , ch . 2. 18 , 19. Speaking of the Adulteress or Whore , he saith ; Her House inclineth unto death , and her paths unto the dead ; none that go unto her return again , neither take they hold of the paths of Life . Shew them , into how great shame and disgrace , and into how much Misery , such Persons ordinarily bring themselves . Sugge● to them , how many other Sins attend this Vice , as its inseparable Companions ; whereby the Soul is so deeply corrupted , as to lose all Sense of any thing that is truly excellent , and worthy of a Rational Creature . Strive to make them sensible , of the miserable bondage of those , who are under the Power and Tyranny of their unruly Lusts and Appetites , who are enslaved to the Pleasures of the Flesh. Endeavour to make them tast of those solid and manly Delights , which are only to be found in the ways of true Vertue and unfeigned Piety , which are infinitely more pure and lasting , than those brutish Pleasures which Sensualists pursue And do what in you lies to preserve them from seeing and hearing any thing that is Unchaste and Impure , * or has the appearance of it . If you find that at any time they Curse and Swear , and take the Name of God in vain , endeavour to rescue them from so horrid and dangerous a Sin. Shew them , that they who practise this Vice , have no profit nor pleasure to tempt them thereto ; that they sell their Souls to the Devil for nothing ; and that they are so far from having any real gain thereby , that they must needs , at some time or other , find no small inconvenience by it , as to their Temporal Concerns ; for they that are wise , and have any sence of Religion , cannot chuse but avoid having much dealings with them , whom they see to be utterly void of the Fear of God * Shew them what a great dishonour 't is to God , their great Lord and Master , their Creator and Preserver , for poor Worms thus to dare to rend and tear , as it were , his most Sacred and Blessed Name ; and how much he is provoked thereby , to inflict his most heavy and severe Judgments upon such bold Sinners , He will not hold him Guiltless that taketh his Name in vain . Ex. 20. 7. That is , tho' Men pass by such Offenders , and do not punish them , yet God will look after them , he will call them to an Account , and be avenged upon them ; he will not fail to punish them . This is reckoned up , Hos. 4. 1 , 2 , 3. as one of the crying Sins , for which God had a controversie with the Israelites , and for which he threatened that their Land should mourn , and that every one that dwelt therein should languish , &c. If they are of a very unconstant and unsetled Temper , so that they can never fix at any thing , nor continue in their Purpose and Resolution ; strive to fix them and to render them of a more staid and setled Mind . If what they have resolved or ▪ begun to do , be not contrary to the Laws of God and men , nor any way ▪ Prejudicial to themselves or others ; it is very adviseable for you , now and then , to keep them close to their Resolution or Undertaking . Though the thing be not worth a rush in it self , which they purpose or undertake , yet their being accustomed to do what they have once resolved , disposeth them to be constant and firm in more useful and excellent Purposes ▪ and Designs ; and besides , it makes the performance of any thing a great deal more easie , when the Spirits can fix at it , until it be accomplished . Whereas , if way be given to a fickle and changeable Humour , it gets strength daily , and at last grows so very Powerful and Tyrannical , that they who are under its unhappy influence , are like a feather driven to and fro with the wind ; they are never able to settle to any thing , tho' never so necessary and important , and so , very ordinarily , prove good for nothing . If you perceive them to be surly , of a rough and morose , an uncivil and disobling Carriage : Strive to cure them of such an unhappy Temper . Teach them to be Courteous and Affable , Civil and Obliging to every body , and carefully to avoid whatever looks like neglect and contempt . Shew them how useful and serviceable , or how hurtful and dangerous , the meanest person may be to them , at some time or other . * Tell them the Fable of the Lion and the Mouse , How , when the Mouse troubled the sleeping Lion , and disturbed him , the Lion was ready in great Wrath to have torn it in pieces ; but the Mouse begged of him to spare him , for he was but a poor Mouse , not worthy of his Wrath , and might live to do him some Service . The Lion was prevailed with to let him go : Afterwards it happened , that the Lion was intangled in a Net , out of which , as great and mighty as he was , he could not deliver himself . But the Mouse , remembring the Lion's Generosity , ate a●under the Net , and so set him at liberty . Hence you may infer to them , how fit and advantageous it is , by a courteous and civil behaviour , to oblige the poorest and most inconsiderable Person , who once in Seven Years , may be able to do them , either a very great kindness , or a great deal of mischief . As you ought to take care , that your Children be very Civil and Courteous to all , so in a more especial manner to Aged Persons , whom God has commanded to be Honoured and Respected , Levit. 19. 32. Thou shalt rise up before the hoary Head , and honour the face of the Old Man. Parents ought to consider , that they may live till they be Old , if they be not so already ; and therefore they ought to Teach their Children to Honour Aged Persons , lest by permitting them to carry themselves disrespectfully and insolently towards them , they themselves should meet with neglect and contempt from them ; which falls out but too often . How worthy of Praise were the Noble Spartans , who Honoured all Aged Persons very much ? * One of them being asked , why their Young People rose up to the Aged , gave this Answer ; That , by being accustomed thus to Honour others , they might so much the more Honour their own Parents . And here I cannot but mention another very notable instance , concerning these Spartans ; which is this . * When an Old Man came to see the Olympick Games , he went about to look for a Seat ; but the Graecians neglected and mocked him , till at last coming where the Spartans fate , all the Children rose up to him , and several more Aged Persons gave place to him . When the rest of the Graecians , ( who had been themselves disrespectful towards him ) applauded the Custom of the Spartans , and highly commended them for it ; the Old Man stroking down his Beard , said , Alas ! what a sad thing is this ? All the Graecians know what is Good and Honourable , but the Spartans only practise it . If you observe your Children , to be very apt to quarrel and contend with one another , and to fall by the Ears together ; be careful to remove their debates , and to make them love one another . By no means wink at their Contentions , especially if they be grown up a little . When such Relations are at variance together , they are of all others the most violent in their Hatred against one another . Witness the Rage and Fury of Cain against Abel , of Esau against Jacob , of Joseph's Brethren against him . A Brother offended , saith Solomon , Prov. 18. 19. is harder to be won than a strong City , and their contentions are like the bars of a Castle . The Learned Philosopher and Historian Plutarch , * reckons it among the things which are next to impossible , for Brethren once at variance , to be afterwards throughly reconciled to one another . As one Member of the Body , torn or cut off from the other , can hardly be glued and joyned together again ; So , says he , when Brethren have once fallen from their Natural Affection , and are possessed with bitterness and wrath against one another , they seldom unite closely any more ; their Reconciliation is ordinarily but skinned over ; whereas , there still remains under the appearance of Friendship , a grievous sore ready to break out . How much is it therefore your Duty , to prevent all manner of strife and division among your Children , and if debates arise among them , to do your utmost to remove them . Teach them to yield and to condescend to one another , to take pleasure in gratifying , rather than in overcoming one another , to rejoice in the Company of one another , to be mightily concerned for one another's Happiness and Welfare , to be upon all occasions ready to help and assist one another , to sympathize very tenderly with one another , in any Pain , Grief , or Loss ; and in a Loving and Friendly manner , to tell one another of their Faults , without publishing of them . Do not encourage them to speak ill of one another , and to report every little thing , whereby they think to lessen one another in your Esteem and Affection . Such things use to be the Seeds of Discord and Contention amongst Children , and therefore Wise Parents ought to prevent them , as much as may be . If you find them over Curious to know what may be their Lot and Fortune , as 't is called , in the World , and therefore apt to hearken to Gypsies and Fortune-Tellers , to consult with Divinatory Books , and to use such other Wicked , tho' but too common Arts , for gratifying their Curiosity ; do what in your lyes , to deliver them from such dangerous and unlawful Practices . Shew them what is written , Levit. 20. 6. The Soul that turneth after such as have familiar Spirits , and after Wizards , to go a whoring after them , I will even set my fave against that Soul , and will ●ut him off from among his People . And Isa. 8. 19. When they shall say unto you , seek unto them that have familiar Spirits , and unto Wizards that peep and that mutter : should not a people seek unto their God ? Likewise , Deut. 18. 10 , 11. There shall not be found among you any one that useth Divination a , or an observer of times b , or an Inchanter , or a Witch , or a Charmer , or a Consulter with familiar Spirits c , or a Wizard , or a Necromancer d . For all that do these things are an abomination unto the Lord. Shew them , that they who follow such courses , do thereby provoke God to leave them , and to deliver them over to the Wicked one , that he may bring upon them those Calamities and Judgments which they deserve , and which perhaps they were told should happen to them : Not , as if those Pretenders to Prophecy did infallibl● know what would come to pass , which most certainly they do not ; but God in his Righteous Judgment , doth often punish with some remarkable stroke , such curious Persons , who presume to enquire into those things which he has thought fit to conceal from them : 'T is said of Saul , 1 Chron. 10. 13 , 14. That , he died for his Transgression , and also for asking Counsel of one that had a familiar Spirit , to enquire of it , and enquired not of the Lord : Therefore he slew him . And tho' they who have been guilty of such impious Enquiries , shall be delivered from Eternal Condemnation , and possibly from some great punishments in this Life , if they sincerely Repent of their Sin , and Folly ; yet oftentimes , they suffer not a little from the impressions which are made on their fancy , by their having heard that some Tragical thing or other should befall them . How many , even good People , having found unspeakable uneasiness , almost all their Life time , only by having heard it said , without their own asking , by such impious pretenders to Divination , that thus or thus it should happen to them : Tho' they abhorred and despised such things , and did what they could to be delivered from having any Reflections upon them , yet now and then , of a sudden , their fancy has been struck therewith , which did not a little disquiet and disturb them . From all which , it appears , how necessary it is for Parents , to prevent their Childrens doing such things . Shew them , that their only safe way , is , to be always careful to do what is good and right , to make the Laws of God their Rule , to seek his Glory as their chief end , to depend on him for direction and assistance , never to be anxious about what is to come , but to leave all Events to his Wise and Good Providence ; humbly to resign themselves to his Holy Will and Pleasure , and to be always ready to be disposed of as he shall see fit . Tell them , ( which you may do with great assurance ) that if they do these things , they may be confident , that all shall be well ; for God will not fail , according to his Promise , to make all things , even the greatest Afflictions , work together for good to them that Love him . Rom. 8. 28. If you perceive them to be unthankful for Favours and Benefits , so as not to take notice of those who help and assist them , and who have done them , or are always ready to do them good Offices ; endeavour to cure them of this very ill Quality . Cause them to thank those who are kind and serviceable to them ; strive to make them retain a lasting Sense of Kindnesses , and to be ready when there is an opportunity , to make some fit acknowledgment and return : For which end , 't will be convenient now and then , to give them some small matter , according to your Quality , for a present to those who have been at some pains to serve them , or who have been very Bountiful or Generous to them . And when they make an acknowledgment for Favors received , advise them to do it with a chearful Countenance , so as to express thereby the inward Sense of their Minds , that they , to whom they make the return of Kindness , may see how hearty and real they are , that they do it , not grudgingly , but very willingly . There is the greater need , to instil into your Childrens Minds , Principles of Gratitude , because 't is so very common amongst Men to be unthankful . For , what is there more common , than to see those neglected and slighted , who have been very kind and serviceable ? How many root up those , by whom themselves have been planted ? How many basely betray their truest Friends and greatest Benefactors ? How many think it a disparagement , to be so much as thought to be beholden to others , tho' their Obligations be very great ? Now , what can there be more base and abominable , than such a Temper as this ? What Villany and Wickedness seem they not likely to commit , who have no Sense of Benefits ? The Apostle Paul reckoneth unthankfulness amongst the great Sins , which make the last days perilous and difficult . 2 Tim. 3. 2. To excite your Children to be thankful ; shew them , how great an abhorrence the very Heathens had of Ingratitude ; they thought it one of the worst things you could say of them , to call them unthankful * ; they reckoned that this Name , included all the bad things that could be imagined ; that unthankfulness was the Fountain , from whence the greatest Vices did spring . See Sen. de Benef. l. 1. c. 10. 'T was a very Excellent and Commendable Custom amongst the Persians * , , that they who were over their Children , amongst other things , taught them Gratitude ; so that if any of the Boys was able to make a grateful return , but did it not , they punished him severely ; for they judged , that they who were unthankful , would also neglect their Duty to God , to their Parents , their Country , and Friends . Amongst other things to be suggested to your Children , to stir them up to be Thankful , you may represent to them , what a shame it is for them to be unthankful , when the very Beasts , both Tame ( as may be seen every day ) and wild , ( as several Authors * tell us ) do things which look like a grateful acknowledgment to their Benefactors . If you find them to be of too Prodigal a Temper , apt to be too profuse in their Expences ; ready to throw away their Money upon Trifles , and when there is no reasonable occasion for it ; you ought by all prudent and proper Methods to endeavour to make them a little more discreet and careful ; That they waste nothing in vain , that may be of use to poor People ; That they do not throw away that which may do good at some time or other . Suggest often to them , that we are Stewards of whatever God bestows upon us , that he will call us to an Account ; and that therefore we ought to employ to good purpose all those good things he gives us . Shew them what our Saviour said to his Disciples , after he had fed five thousand men with five Loaves and two Fishes , Joh. 6. 12. When they were filled , he said unto his Disciples , Gather up the fragments that remain , that nothing be lost . He would not have any thing lost , 〈◊〉 thrown away unnecessarily , whi● might be useful afterwards to one 〈◊〉 other . If you find them of a Covetous Temper ; endeavou● to enlarge their thoughts b● the Principles of Christian Charity Shew them what an excellent thi● it is to do good ; to shew mercy an● kindness ; to make Peoples hearts glad● Accustom them to the doing such kin● and charitable Offices ; for which en● give them now and then money , an● other things , to bestow on those wh● are poor and needy . Shew them th● evil of Covetousness ; that it 's the ro● of all evil , * that it take● the heart off from God , an● rendereth it unfit for th● consideration of Divin● things , and for all worthy and useful designs ; that it disposeth● man for the basest and vilest action● and undertakings , as it did Judas to betray his Lord ; That it bereaves him of true repose and satisfaction of mind , and pierceth him through with many sorrows . 1 Tim. 6. 9. 10. If you perceive them to be naturally melancholy , and fearful of every little thing , endeavour to chear up their Spirits : Suggest to them such considerations , and possess them with such Maxims and Principles , as tend to fortifie their minds against those things which are apt to make them uneasie , and are the occasion of their fear . If their distemper proceed from some bodily indisposition , as oft-times it does , use such helps as are necessary : When such evil habits of body are once rooted and strongly fixed , and when the blood and spirits are deeply infected therewith , they are a very grievous clog to the Soul , and a great hindrance to that chearfulness and liberty of Spirit , wherewith people ought always to endeavour to serve God. If you see them to be of too gay and airy a Temper , so that they cannot fix and be stayed at any time ; you are to use a great deal of prudence and discretion to compose and settle their Spirits ; See that they use their Wit and Fancy without giving offence , and that they hurt no body by indecent reflections : Let them by no means take liberty to indulge their humour in jesting about things that are Sacred , or that have any relation thereto . But you are to take heed lest your endeavouring to cure one fault , occasion another ; lest your striving to deliver them from one extream , drive them to the contrary ; that is , lest instead of their being too gay , you make them melancholy and dull : Their Wit and Spirit is not to be rooted out , but reformed and rightly managed ; for this may be of use , for seasoning and sweetning Conversation . If you observe them to be rash and forward , ready to speak and act without due consideration ; strive to make them more cautious and circumspect ; to reflect and think a little more , on what they say and do ; lest otherwise , they fall into a habit of speaking and acting impertinently and indiscreetly . When they say or do a foolish thing , for lack of consideration , then take occasion to make them sensible what a shame it is for them to do so ; what a reproach to those who are reasonable Creatures , to speak and act like Fools without Reason and Understanding : Shew them some of the bad consequences which attend speaking and acting in this manner . Particularly , that such Persons not only expose themselves to Contempt and Scorn , but likewise to a great deal of danger and trouble . Tell them , how a great many , by their rash and unadvised , though not ill intended , Speeches and Actions , have not only highly exasperated their Enemies , but also provoked their Friends , and forfeited their kindness , which thereby has been changed sometimes into the utmost Indignation and Hatred . Shew them , how some , by this means , have lost their Estate , their Honour , and Life it self : and not only have ruined themselves by their rashness and folly , but likewise a great many of their best Friends and dearest Relations . A due sense of these things ought to excite all Parents to do what they can , to render their Children very considerate and wary in whatever they say or do . And because , for lack of knowledge and experience , they are in hazard to fall into many miscarriages , and to commit great absurdities , if they govern themselves wholly by their own fancy and apprehension , or by their inclinations and desires , therefore direct them to ask you , or to ask others , whom you recommend to them , whether it be fit for them to do this or that , which they have a mind to do . It will be of unspeakable advantage to them all their Life long , to learn this piece of Wisdom betimes , to wit , to be jealous , and not too confident of their own Apprehensions and Opinions , and to have a great regard for the Judgment and Opinion of others . Solomon makes this a distinguishing Mark betwixt a wise Man and a Fool , that the way of a Fool is right in his own Eyes , ( and therefore he scorns to ask the opinion , or to follow the advice of others ; ) but he that hearkeneth unto Counsel is wise . Prov. 12. 15. Thus you are to make it your Business to watch over your Children , and to consider what are their defects and faults , and to do all that you can to cure them thereof , and to direct them in the ways of Wisdom and Virtue . You are careful to pluck up the weeds in your Gardens , while they are yet young , and not deeply rooted , lest otherwise the good Seeds should be choak'd up with them . How much more careful ought you to be , lest the Souls of your Children should be over-run with vicious Qualities ? If your Childrens Limbs are crooked and very deform'd , you are at great pains and sometimes at no small charge likewise , so long as there is hopes of Success , to make them straight and comly . Ought you not to be at as much pains at least for their Souls ? Ought you not to do what in you lies , to shape and frame them to Virtue and Piety , that they may become amiable and acceptable in the sight of God ? 5. Duty , to see that they be taught to Read. Fifthly , When once they are of an Age fit for it , see that they be taught to read . And if you have not leisure , or perhaps have not skill to teach them your selves , you must be careful to make choice of a skilful and discreet Person to do it ; who by his teaching and Example , may train them up both in Knowledge and Virtue ; who may not only tea● them to know the Letters , to spel● exactly , to read distinctly , to write well , &c. but also to know themselves to remember their Creator in the days 〈◊〉 their Youth , to hate every evil way , and to take delight in the ways of God's Holy Commandments . If a careful choice be made of a wise and faithful● School-Master for your Children , i● will render your work so much the mor● easie . Having sent your Children to School , you must keep them there , and not by your too great fondness make them long to be at home , and grow weary and uneasie at School . A great many indiscreet Parents ruin their Children by immoderate kindness ; they cannot endure that they should be out of their sight one day . They are afraid , lest they that teach them should correct them , and therefore they give them a strict charge not to do it ; and if they do it never so gently and discreetly , without more ado they remove their Children from them , and discharge their Passion against them as the greatest Tyrants in the World. 'T is true , some , who have the Charge of Children , are very indiscreet in correcting them , they pass beyond all Bounds of Moderation ; and by their Tyrannical carriage towards them , they do them a World of Mischief in many respects . As for such School-Masters , Parents ought , if it be possible , to avoid sending of their Children unto them . But when once they have made choice of those , who are not only Pious , but Wise and Discreet Persons , who are skilful in the way of Teaching , and are of a calm and mild Spirit ; they ought to be so far from restraining them , that they should rather encourage them to correct them whenever there is any necessity for it . And if , at any time , their Children complain to them of their having been Corrected , they ought to let them know , that they are very well pleased that they have been corrected for their Faults , and that they will thank their School-Master for having done so . Unless such a Power as this be given to those who teach Children , there is no great probability of their doing much good to th● far greatest part of them : For , as Solomon says , Prov. 22. 15. Foolishness 〈◊〉 bound in the Heart of a Child , and therefore there is need of the Rod of Correction to drive it far from him . ' T● but too manifest , that Children wh● know their Parents Fondness , prove unruly and untractable , and do generall● become very wicked and naughty . When once they find themselves a Liberty , and see that they are in 〈◊〉 great danger of being curb'd and restrain'd , they are apt to follow th● Biass of their corrupt Inclinations ▪ And then it often cometh to pass what is said by the Wise Man , Prov. 29 15. A Child left to himself bringeth 〈◊〉 Mother to shame . The Mother only 〈◊〉 mentioned , because ordinarily , she 〈◊〉 more apt to exceed just Bounds in he● Indulgence , and consequently has 〈◊〉 great Hand in spoiling her Child : An● besides , when her Child brings hurt an● disgrace upon himself , by his wicked and foolish Courses , she useth to be more deeply affected therewith , through the tenderness of her nature , and the strength and violence of her Affection and Passion . Now , to stir up Parents to take care their Children be taught to read , at least the Holy Bible ; let them consider , that this Sacred Book will instruct them in the Art of being happy ; how to be saved ; how to obtain a Crown of Glory ; how to purchase an enduring Substance , a Pearl of great price , and a Kingdom which cannot be shaken : It will teach them true Wisdom ; how to avoid Sin , and to escape Danger ; how to resist the Devil , to stand against his Wiles , to quench his fiery Darts ; how to overcome the World , and to mortifie the Flesh with its Affections and Lusts ; how to subdue their natural Corruption , and to conquer all their wicked Habits and Customs ; how to redeem the time ; how to carry themselves as they ought to do in their several Capacities and Relations , wherein God hath placed them in the World ; how to enjoy satisfaction and contentment in every state and condition of Life ; How to use aright the things of this World ; how to improve Prosperity , and how to reap advantage from Adversity ; how to dwell at ease , and to enjoy real Peace and Comfort amidst the greatest Vexations and Confusions that can happen . All these things the Holy Scriptures will teach both you and them , if they are read as they ought to be , to wit , with a serious and humble mind , with an earnest desire to know the Will of God , and with a firm and sincere Resolution to do it . And therefore , how careful ought you to be , in so considerable a part of your duty towards your Children ? If your condition in the World is such , as disables you from doing much for them as to their outward Estate , yet if you do this , it may prove ( unless it be their own fault ) of unspeakable advantage to them , and , in some sense , better than a great Portion , or than a gainful Trade , as may appear from what has been said . When once they can read tollerably well in the Holy Bible , be careful that they do it more or less every day : See that they do it with great Reverence , as being the Word of God : Cause them to consider who it is that speaketh to them therein ; and what it is that he commands , promises , or threatens ; direct them at first to read such places , as are most easie to be understood , and which are apt to make the deepest Impressions : After they have read , see what they remember ; cause them to tell you what they can call to mind : Explain to them so far as you are able , what they do not know ; especially in such things as are most useful to make them wiser and better . Appoint them now and then a verse or two , to get by heart ; cause them to repeat them with due Gravity ; let them not do it in a trifling manner , as if they were telling a silly Story . Do not appoint them too many things to be got by heart , for this will do more hurt than good : A few things well understood do better than a great many by rote . Be careful lest they read any Books which tend to poyson their minds , to fill them with false Opinions , or to lead them to bad practices : Their tender minds are apt very quickly to be corrupted by such Treatises . Even they who are of a more fixed and solid Virtue , are in danger of receiving hurt by reading such Books ; especially when they are writ with great Art , and when their Notions are represented in fair and Beautiful Colours ; They are apt to impress on the Fancy some Images of no good consequence to the Soul : How great need therefore have Parents to restrain their Children from reading such Books as tend to pollute their innocent and chaste minds , which are capable of receiving any sort of impressions either good or bad ? As for Books of Devotion ; great care is to be taken , that only such be put into their hands as are writ in a plain and easie style ; which treat of things fit and needful to be known by them ; and which are most likely to make them Wise and Good. They are to be accustomed to the Writings of those who are Men of greatest Moderation ; who do not impose their own conceits , as necessary Rules of Devotion ; who do not require such things as absolutely needful to be done , which God hath not declared to be so ; nor yet who shorten the Rule , by cutting off such things as God hath injoyned us : All Books which lead Men to extreams , are carefully to be avoided ; and such Treatises are to be made use of , as contain the plain and necessary Doctrines of Christianity ; which tend to inspire Men with the Spirit of Purity , of Truth , of Peace and Love ; which promote Sincerity , Justice , Temperance , Charity , Meekness , Humility , Patience , Resignation to the Will of God in all things , Zeal for his Honour and Glory , a firm Belief and Trust in him , &c. When it is requisite to acquaint them with the different Opinions amongst Protestants , that their minds may not be unfixed and unsettled , when they go abroad into the World ; be sure not to put into their hands such Tracts as are writ with a fiery uncharitable Spirit , and in a Dogmatick and Magisterial manner ; but such as are writ with great Temper and Moderation ; which tend to heal the Church of all Contentions and Divisions , and not to kindle and increase them ; which do not load Mens Opinions with unjust , extravagant , and impious consequences , which never entred into the minds of those who vouched them ; but such as make fair and favourable Constructions , and just allowances . Such Treatises are chiefly to be chosen for them , which dispose Men to be humble and modest ; not to be stiff and pertinacious in their own private Sentiments ; not rashly and severely to condemn others who have different thoughts ; and never on the account of any such particular Opinions to break the Peace of Christian Society ; nor to grow more cold in their respect and affection towards those who have not the same thoughts with themselves in lesser matters . They are , as it were , to feed upon Books of this sort , and carefully to digest them . 6. Duty , to bring them to the place of publick Worship so soon as they are fit for it . Sixthly , You are to bring them to the place of publick Worship so soon as they are fit for it , that they may have the benefit of the Prayers of God's People , and may learn , as they are capable , somewhat that may make them wiser and better . Thus we find , when Joshua read the Law before the Congregation ; the little Ones are mentioned as present amongst the Men and Women . Josh. 8. 35. Teach them to pray to God before they go to Church , and to beg of him that he would fit them and assist them , to joyn in the publick Worship with unfeigned Devotion , and to hear the Word in a right manner . Teach them also to pray for all those whom God employs to Preach his Word , and particularly for his Servant whom they are to hear ; that he would Sanctifie him , and direct and enable him to teach others the true way to Life and Blessedness . And as you ought to direct them what to do before they go to Church , so you must take heed how they carry themselves in the House of God , that it be with all possible silence and reverence ; and that they perform their publick Devotions in a decent manner . See that they do not spend their time in gazing upon others , in observing their Dresses and Modes , their looks and Gestures ; nor yet in bowing and making Courtesies to every body of their Acquaintance they happen to see in the midst of their Prayers . Though this be too common a Practice , yet it ought carefully to be avoided , as unsuitable to that seriousness , that fear and Reverence , that Fervency and Devotion , which true Worshippers of God ought to be possessed with , when in the most Solemn manner they are , or ought to be employed , either in paying their Homage to the King of Heaven and Earth , their Lord , their Maker , and Saviour ; or in hearing the Message that is delivered in his Name , by his Ambassadors . When they come from Church , see what they remember ; if they have got any thing by heart , encourage them : If they remember nothing , you may tell them somewhat or other of the Sermon which is fit for them to learn. Stir them up so soon as their Years are fit for it , to meditate more or less on what they have heard , that so the Word of God may profit them . Shew them , that as their Food cannot nourish them , if their Stomach do not concoct and digest what they Eat and Drink , so neither will the Word of God nourish , quicken , and strengthen their Souls , if they do not , by serious Meditation , digest what they read and hear . Endeavour by their constant attendance on the publick Worship , to beget in them a mighty regard thereto , as being one great means appointed of God to increase in them true Knowledge and Piety . Let them not spend the rest of the Lords Day in rambling about ; but , so far as their Age can bear it , let them be imployed usefully . Shew them why they should observe this Day , to wit , because on it Our Blessed Lord Jesus Christ , rose from the Grave , Triumphed over Death , and finished the work of Our Redemption . As He was delivered ( and died ) for our Offences , so He was raised again for our justification . Rom. 4. 25. To us the Lord's Day , saith One of the Ancients , * is therefore venerable , and to be observed in a Solemn manner , because thereon Our Saviour , as the rising Sun , having dispelled the darkness of Death , shone forth by the Light of His Resurrection . 'T will not be unfit , to acquaint them with some instances of God's righteous and dreadful judgments , against prophaners of this Day ; and particularly , how a great many , who have come to an untimely End , confessed and acknowledged , before their Death , that their slighting and profaneing this Day , made way for all those Villanies , and Impieties , which at last brought God's heavy Judgments upon them . That your Children may attend the publick devotions of the Church , and the preaching of the Gospel , with greater profit and advantage ; 't is necessary that you endeavour to possess them with a great regard , for those whom God employs in so Holy a Service , that they may esteem them very highly in Love for their Works sake . 1 Thes. 5. 13. When the Persons employed in Divine Ministraitons are loved and esteemed , their Doctrine is apt to make the greater Impression , and to be the more successful : Whereas , if People are prejudic'd against them , tho' never so unjustly , what they say will be slighted , or very little regarded for most part , even tho' what is spoken be most excellent in it self , and expressed in such a manner , as might otherwise very much affect and excite the dullest Hearers . The Truth of this , did not only appear in the Holy Prophets , but in our most Blessed Master Himself , who , tho' He spake as never Man spake , yet what He said was but very little regarded by most part of the Jews , and ev'n by his own Brethren and Kinsmen , who were possess'd with most unjust and groundless prejudices against him . The Consideration of this , ought to make you Careful , to beget in your Children a due Sense of the Dignity and Excellency of the Pastoral Office , and likewise a just value for the Persons themselves , whom God makes use of to Minister unto Him in Holy Things , whom He calls to be the Guides of Souls and Stewards of the Mysteries of God. If Men have a great Respect for Ministers of State , and for the Ambassadors of Earthly Princes , who are employ'd to manage the Concerns of the Kingdoms or Principalities of this World ; shall they account the Ministers and Ambassadors of Jesus Christ , unworthy of the least regard and esteem ? Whom the King of Kings and Lord of Lords , hath chosen out of the rest of Mankind , and whom He hath set apart for His own immediate Service , to publish His Will , and to offer Life and Salvation to the Sons of Men , to rescue them from their evil Courses , to direct them what they must do to be saved , and to shew them , not only by their Doctrine but Example , the way wherein they ought to go . And tho' some of those who are of this sacred Employment , are far from being what they should , yet you must be careful what you say concerning them before your Children ; you ought to keep from their Knowledge , such faults and blemishes as are not obvious and notorious . Beware of taking occasion of reproaching them , and thinking meanly of them , for their Infirmities . And when their miscarriages are very heinous and such as cannot be concealed , you ought to take care , not to aggravate them or make them worse , but to speak of them so , as your Children may see , you are only Enemies to their Vices , and not to their Persons or Holy Office. That you may fortifie your Children against the danger they are in from such sad Examples , shew them , that our Holy Religion is not the worse , because some of those who are Ministers do not live suitably to their Calling and Profession ; that it is Men ( the best of whom are Imperfect and Sinful , and subject to the like Passions with others ) and not Angels , who are put by God in the Office of the Ministry : That amongst the twelve Apostles of our Blessed Master and Saviour , one of them was a Thief and a Traitor ; that the Holy Doctrine which such Persons Preach , is not in it self the less excellent , and worthy of acceptation , because it is delivered by those who do not live as they Preach ; that there were many such Teachers in the days of our Saviour , and yet he for had not the Jews to hear them , only he gave them a caution to beware of their ill Example . The Scribes and Pharisees , says he , Mat. 23. 2 , 3. sit in Moses Seat , and therefore whatever they bid you observe , that observe and do ; but do not ye after their Works , for they say , and do not . I thought it so much the more necessary to suggest this Direction , because 't is none of the least Sins of this Age and Kingdom , that too many are very apt to despise and speak ill of the Ministers of Jesus Christ ; to listen to all Reports which are to their disadvantage , to believe them too readily , and to repeat them in all Companies , and even before their Children with a great deal of pleasure . And there want not those who have a very fruitful Invention on this Subject , who contrive a great many Stories , to bespatter them , and to lessen and destroy their Reputation ; whereby they too successfully promote the Kingdom of Satan , and shew themselves to be his Ministers . When once the great Enemy of Souls has gain'd this point , to make the Persons of Ministers contemptible , 't will be no hard matter for him to make Men undervalue and despise the very Office it self : And what can be the consequence of this , but the rise and growth of Heresies , of Factions , and Schisms , of Atheism and Irreligion , and of all that can be thought of , that is any way dishonourable to God , and destructive to the Souls of Men ? Of all which there are but too many sad Instances at this day , which are a most certain Evidence of the great decay of real Piety and Christi●nity , and that there is but very little of true Religion to be found amongst us . And as this so common Contempt of the Clergy is a sign of the great Wickedness of the Age , so it is a Presage of heavy Judgments . When the Messengers of God were mocked , and his words despised , and his Prophets abused , the Wrath of the Lord arose against his People , till there was no Remedy . 2 Chron. 36. 16. 7. Duty , to make them understand their Baptismal Covenant . Seventhly , Do all that you can to make them understand their Baptismal Covenant ; and if there be opportunity to own and renew it publickly and solemnly , fail not to encourage their doing it . It 's of great Importance for them , to make a Solemn Profession of their Faith , and to declare their Resolution of performing their Baptismal Promise : It is of great advantage to them , at such an occasion , to have the Prayers of the Church , and particularly of those , who are appointed of God , to bless the People . It is true , the great abuses which have been committed in the performance of this Ancient Ceremony , have made many People to slight and neglect it ; but 〈◊〉 Confirmation were performed with that care and seriousness , which ought to be used on such an occasion , it is a Custom which might be of marvellous benefit in the Church ; both to stir up Parents to instruct their Children , and Ministers to Chatechise them , and acquaint them with those things that are needful for them to know , to believe , and to do . The careful and Religious use of it , would tie Children more strictly to mind the great concerns of their Souls ; it would afford them occasion to consider what it is to have been Baptised , and to be a Christian : It would work in them a more Powerful Sense of the Obligations of Christianity ; and make them more careful to live up to that Holy Religion , whereof they made so publick a Profession : It would make them more afraid to do bad things , against which they had protested so solemnly . And not only fear , but shame in this case , would restrain them from doing wickedly . This would be to young People a great defence against Temptations : Bad Men would not so boldly ask them to sin , if they knew they had openly and Solemnly disowned and renounced them , and all their wicked Courses ; and if they were tempted , they would be more apt to say in their own minds , Shall we do such wicked things , and run the hazard of being Covenant-breakers , and Perjured Persons ? Shall we commit such Villanies , and practice such Abominations , and thereby break our Solemn Vow and Engagement ? Shall we by our Folly and Impiety give occasion of Offence and Scandal to the Church of Christ , which he hath purchased with his Blood ? Shall we renounce the Captain of our Salvation , and prove Deserters , who have so lately vowed to renounce the Devil and all his Works ? What a mighty defence would this be to your Children , when Assaulted by the fiery Darts of the Devil , the Vanities of the World ▪ and the Lusts of their own Deceitful Hearts ? to consider , that by their own actual Consent , they have renounced all these , and given up themselves into the Hands of God , to be kept by his Mighty Power , through Faith unto Salvation ; They have Vowed , and they ought to perform it , to keep his Righteous Judgments . These things being impartially considered , should mightily excite Parents to see that their Children do openly and Solemnly pro●ess their Faith in Christ Crucified ; their Resolution to Obey him , to Serve him , and Love him , to fight under his Banner , against Sin , the Devil , and the World , and to continue his Faithful Souldiers and Servants unto their lives end . Is not this your Glory , that your Children are Christians ? And do you think it a Shame or Dishonour for you or them , if they make a Solemn Profession of their Christianity ; that they avo● their Religion , and will by God's help make good the Promise which was made in their Name in Baptism ? Of so great Importance is this Custom , that the greatest Men amongst the Reformers did highly commend it , and did earnestly wish that it might be restored as a thing of great use towards the reviving the true Spirit of Christianity . 8. Duty , to encourage them to come to the Lord's Table . Eightly , When they are fit for it , you should encourage them to come to the Table of the Lord , that they may be strengthened in their most Holy Faith , and further assured of the Love of God ; that they may make a publick Profession of their Christianity , of their Love to their Lord and Master Jesus , of their Charity to all Men , and of their sincere Affection to those who are Christ's Members and Followers : They ought to make use of this Holy Sacrament , that their Love to their dearest Lord and Saviour may be kindled and enflamed , by remembring his Love , and shewing forth his Death ; that they may bind themselves more strictly to Serve and Obey him , and to fulfil their Baptismal Engagement . How glad should Parents be to see their Children advanced to this Honour , to eat and drink at their Lord's Table , to partake of so great a Testimony of his Kindness and Friendship ? How earnestly should they encourage them to embrace this opportunity , of renewing their Covenant with the Lord , to live and to die his Faithful Servants ? Do you not desire to have them saved , to have them delivered from their Lusts and Passions , their Pride and Vanity , their Bitterness and Wrath , their Malice and Envy , and from all manner of Sin and Folly ? To be made pure and clean in Heart and Life ; to be made meet for that Holy Place , where no unclean thing can enter ? Do you not desire that their Sins may be blotted out , that they may be washed with the Blood of their Saviour ? And yet do you not advise and entreat them , for their Souls Health and Safety , to come to the Holy Communion ? which is designed as a means for these excellent and great Ends and Purposes , to as many as are qualified according to the Terms of the Gospel , that is , who unfeignedly repent of their Sins , and believe in the Lord Jesus with all their Heart . But , alas ! how far are too many Parents from doing this for their Children ? How many do either wholly , or for the most part , neglect and slight this Holy Ordinance themselves , as if our Lord had without any just or necessary ground appointed it ? How can such Persons expect the precious Fruits of the Death of Christ , who will not remember his Death , when he so lovingly and kindly calls and invites them to do it ? Do this , says he , in remembrance of me . What a great Argument is it , of a wonderful decay of true Piety and Religion in the World , when Men do thus despise and set at naught the kindness of their Lord and Saviour ? When they refuse to do a thing , so just and reasonable , and so easie as this is ; which tends so much to his Glory , and their own true Happiness and Welfare , both here and hereafter . 9. Duty , to take care that they accustom themselves to Self-Examination . Ninthly , When they are fit for it , see that they accustom themselves to Self-Examination , that they spend a few Moments every Night ( if another time of the Day be not more convenient for them to do it in , ) in calling themselves to an account ; that they may see what good or what evil they have done ; that they may give Praise and Thanks unto God for any thing they have done , which was good and right ; and that they may confess their Sins and Follies , begging his Gracious Pardon , and renewing their Purposes and Resolutions to do better for the time to come . But besides these daily short Reviews of their Heart and Life , 't is fit to call ●pon them , when they are well advanced i● Years , to a more strict and Solemn Examination of themselves ; to Prayer and Fasting , as their Age and Strength can bear it . This may be done at first once a Month , or once i● two Months , or once a Quarter at least ; but after some time , it may be done oftner , according as your necessary Affairs and your Circumstances in the World will permit . They who are Great and Rich , ought so much the more frequently , to call upon their Children to those private extraordinary Excrcises of Devotion , because their outward Estate in the World does , ordinarily , afford them enough of time and leisure for such Performances , if they will but redeem it from Idleness , and from a great many vain and unnecessary Actions . As to their Abstinence from Food on such days , there 's no Rule can be given to serve all Persons ; if they can fast one Meal or two it is well ; if not , then they may eat less at a time , and of such things as are less apt to be a hinderance to their Devotion : That is to be done that serves most to render them fit for Prayer and Meditation . It will be convenient , in order to their doing this to good purpose , to be directed to a method , that so their thoughts may not wander and be unfixed : For which end , it will be of good use , to have the direction of their Minister , if he be a discreet and good man , or of some other pr●dent serious Christian Friend : Or you may recommend to them some plain and easie short Treatise on this Subject , such as you shall find written discreetly with due moderation of Spirit . There is not any one method can be prescribed for all Persons , nor fit for all times : But in general , upon such days , it 's fit for them to begin with Prayer to God , humbly begging the Divine Assistance and Direction ; that he would open their Eyes , to see their Sin and Folly , and to discover his Mercy and Kindness , his long Suffering and Patience towards them , that they may be thereby led to Repentance . They may next enquire particularly and strictly into their ways and doings ; which they may do , by considering what have been their Thoughts , their Words and Deeds ; each of which they are to examine according to the Rule of God's Word : Or , ( which comes to the same thing ) they may go over the Commandments , and see wherein they have broken any of them : Wherein they find themselves Guilty , they are with unfeigned Sorrow and inward Contrition , to confess it , to mourn for it , and earnestly to beg Forgiveness of God ; resolving with full purpose of Heart , to do so no more ; but to cease from Evil , and to learn to do well . They are to consider what Temptations they are most in danger of ; that they may avoid them : They are also to consider what course they must take , and what Christian methods they must use , to overcome their Evil Inclinations and ●oolish and bad Customs ; and they are to resolve to govern themselves accordingly ; and sincerely to endeavour to go on unto Perfection . After this , they may reflect on the kind Providences they have met with ; that their Souls may be filled with a grateful Sense thereof ; that they may return all Praise and Thanks to God for his Mercy and Love ; and may be excited for the time to come , to trust more firmly in him , and to depend upon him . They may particularly consider , wherein God hath been pleased to answer their Prayers , and to grant them the good things they have asked of him for their Souls and Bodies , for themselves or for others ; that their Piety and Love to God may be thereby the more kindled , and their Devotion excited ; that their Faith and Hope may be made more strong and lively . They may take notice likewise of the Corrections and Chastisements , wherewith God hath thought fit to exercise them ; that thereby they may be awakened from Sin , and made wiser and better for the time to come . It will be very useful for them to have a Note in Writing of those various particulars ; that they may on such days review them , and with the more ease make such Reflections on them , as tend to their Improvement in real Piety . Besides these Acts of Devotion , which concern themselves immediately ; it will be fit on such days to make earnest and hearty Prayers to God for all Mankind ; For the Conversion of Jews , Turks , and Pagans , For the Reformation of those Christian Countries that are corrupted with Superstition and Idolatry ; For Union amongst those that are divided in their Opinions about lesser matters ; For deliverance to those who are persecuted for Righteousness sake ; and for these Lands , ( that God may inspire us with a Spirit of Peace , of Love , and of true Piety ; ) For our King and Queen ; For all Judges and Magistrates ; For all the Ministers of the Gospel ; For all their Friends and Relations ; For all their Enemies ; and for all who desire their Prayers , of whom it is not unfit to keep a particular Note in Writing , that this Christian Office may be performed towards them with all Faithfulness and Kindness . They are next to consider , what may be done by them for the Honour of God and the good of Men ; and are to resolve to do some Act or other of Piety or Charity , which may be of real Advantage to Mens Souls or Bodies . One thing more I shall mention , which may be very useful on such days ; and that is , That they consider what are the things wherein they desire more earnestly the Divine Assistance and Direction ; which they may write down distinctly , that they may renew their Petitions therein every day . And thereafter , especially on such Days as they appoint for more Solemn Reflection and Humiliation , they may consider what Answers God has been pleased to afford them . These are a few General Heads on this Subject , which may be of great advantage , in Order to the promoting of true Devotion . But the designed brevity of this Treatise does not permit the enlarging upon them . 10. Duty , to observe what Providences they meet with , and to acquaint them therewith in due time , as also with some of the most remarkable Providences , which either they ( to wit the Parents ) themselves , or others have met with . Lastly , Consider what Providences they meet with , what signal Mercies and Favours their Merciful Father bestoweth upon them ; what Dangers and Hazards they have escaped ; wherein God's Kindness and Mighty Power has appeared towards them , in preserving them , and keeping them alive : Keep a Note thereof in Writing ; that so when they come to Age , you may acquaint them therewith , that they may therein read the loving Kindness and tender Mercies of the Lord , and his wonderful Goodness and Favour towards them ; and may be excited to be thankful , and to put their Trust and Confidence in him , whose Mercies are over all his Works . But , alas ! How far are most Parents from doing this ? Very few do any such thing for themselves ; the Mercies of God are renewed to them every Morning , they live at his cost and charge , he gives them richly all things to enjoy ; all their good things are from him alone : But how little do they consider , and take notice of the Hand of God , in those many and great Benefits he loads them with every hour and moment ? they do not reflect upon the great and marvellous things that he does for them ; they live as if they were altogether insensible of God's Mercies and loving Kindnesses ; and no wonder , if they take little thought to possess their Children with any Impressions of that , whereof they have no sense themfelves . But if Parents did , as they ought , acquaint their Children with God's Providences towards them in their Infancy , and in the days of their Youth , when they were not so capable themselves to reflect thereupon , it would have a great force upon Ingenuous minds , to stir in them Pious and Religious Dispositions . It would likewise very much serve this end , if Parents would often reflect on God's kind Providences to selves , and now and then talk * of them to their Children , and acquaint them sometimes with one Instance of God's care and kindness towards them , and sometimes with another ; this would insensibly make an Impression on tender minds , and in due time might bring forth good Fruits . Shew your Children therefore , How God was pleased to provide for you , when you were in great necessity and want ; How he raised up Friends to help you , in the day of your Distress ; How he preserved you from Danger ; How he delivered you out of many and great Afflictions and Troubles : How he comforted you in the days of your mourning ; How he raised you up , when you were brought very low ; How he defeated the designs of your malicious Adversaries ; How he disposed a great many uneasie and afflictive things , sometimes for your Temporal , and always for your Spiritual Advantage ; How he assisted and seconded your endeavours to serve him , with great and unexpected Success ; How he rewarded and blessed you , when you did those things which were good and right before him ; And how he punished and chastened you , when you omitted your Duty , or did and said a bad and wicked thing ; How he heard your Prayers , and Granted you the desires of your Souls ; How he prevented you with his loving Kindness and tender Mercy ; How he satisfied your longing Souls with good things ; And how he deals with you , exceeding abundantly above all that you could think or ask . In this manner , according as you have met with particular Instances of the good and kind Providence of God , you ought , at some times , when you find it most likely to do good , to talk thereof to your Children , that thereby they may be awakened to observe and consider the Powerful , Just , Wise , and Kind Providence of God ; and may be excited , together with you , to bless his Holy Name , for his great , his marvellous , and undeserved Love towards you . You ought also , to discourse sometimes to them , concerning some of the most Signal Instances of Divine Providence towards others , which either you have observed your selves , or which you have received an account of from Persons of very good Authority : For Example , Shew them , how God has brought down proud and lofty Persons , when their Hearts were lifted up ; How he covered them with Shame and Reproach , and made them Loathsome , Vile , and Contemptible , almost to every body ; And how he raised up humble and lowly Persons ; How he followed them with the Expressions of his Mercy and Love ; How he turned Peoples Hearts towards them , inclining them to love and honour them , and to do them many good and kind Offices . This will tend to teach your Children Humility , and to restrain them from Pride and Self-conceit . Tell them , what has befallen many Passionate and Impatient Men ; How they have run into the Pit of Destruction , when they gave up themselves to to the Conduct of their own violent and unruly Passions ; And how the meek and patient Ones have been directed , assisted , and preserved by the good Providence of God ; And how they have enjoyed a great deal of Peace , Joy , and Happiness , amidst the many Afflictions and Troubles they met with in the World. This will tend to teach them to be meek , to restrain their Passion , and to beware of Impatience . Tell them , How God has punished those who have got Wealth and Riches by false , unjust , and indirect means ; How he has cursed their Estates , and sent a moth into them , which has in a short time insensibly wasted and consumed them ; And how he hath blessed the Estate and Substance of those , who have got their Wealth by honest and lawful means . This will tend to make them honest and sincere in their dealings in the World , and to hate false and crooked ways . Tell them , how God has punished Cursers and Vain and False Swearers , how the Curse has followed them , how often it has happened to such Persons according to their mad and horrid Imprecations . Tell them , how God , by very unexpected and surprising ways and means , has discovered and cut off Traitors , Murtherers , Adulterers , Thieves , and Robbers , False Witnesses , &c. Tell them , how he has appeared , sooner or later , in behalf of his Servants and Children ; How he has wonderfully defended and preserved sincere and upright Men ; How he has avenged Innocent Blood ; How he has defended the Widow and Fatherless ; How he has heard the cry of the Stranger , of the Desolate and Oppressed , &c. Such things as these , being seaso●●bly and frequently suggested to Children , may , at some time or other , work upon their minds , and cause thee to take notice of the Power , Wisdom , Mercy , and Justice of God ; which they cannot do in good earnest , but th●● must needs be thereby stirred up to fear him , to love him , to obey him , and to walk in his ways . And tho' these things do not produce their effect at the very time when they are told , yet some time or other they may catch hold of the minds of your Children ▪ and have a very powerful and lasting Influence upon them . The Example of Faithful Abraham ought to excite you to do these things . For this end did God acquaint him with what he intended to do to Sodom , because he knew that he would improve all his Providences , that he would not smother them in his own Breast , but acquaint his Children and Family therewith , that thereby they also might learn to be wiser and better ; that they might see the terribleness of the Divine Justice against Incorrigible Sinners ; and his Infinite Compassion towards those who fear and love him ; that they might know the Power and Efficacy of Prayer , and see how ready the Lord is to hear all those who call upon him in earnest , not only for themselves , but also in behalf of others . And the Lord said , ( Gen. 18. 17. ) Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do ? and v. 19. For I know him , that he will command ( or instruct , as the word is used sometimes ) his Children , and his Houshold after him , and they shall keep the way of the Lord to do Justice and Judgment , &c. Suitably to this Example , we find a general Command given to the Jews , Deut. 4. 9 , 10. Take heed to thy self , and keep thy Soul diligently , lest thou forget the things which thine Eyes have seen , and left they depart from thine heart all the days of thy Life ; but teach them thy Sons and thy Sons Sons : Especially the day that thou stoodest before the Lord thy God in Horeb , &c. To the same purpose we find a Direction given them touching the Passover , Ex. 13. 8. Thou shalt shew thy Son in that day , saying , This is done because of that which the Lord did unto me , when I came forth out of Egypt , &c. And v. 14. And it shall be when thy Son asketh thee in time to come , saying , What is this ? ( to wit , that is said about setting apart unto the Lord the First-born ) That thou shalt say unto him , by strength of Hand the Lord brought us out from Egypt , from the House of Bondage . And it came to pass when Pharaoh would hardly let us go , that the Lord slew all the First-born in the Land of Egypt . — Therefore I Sacrifice to the Lord all that openeth the Matrix , but all the First-born of my Children I redeem . Likewise Josh. 4 6 , 7. 'T is said , When your Children ask their Fathers in time to come , saying , What mean you by these Stones ? Then ye shall answer them , that the Waters of Jordan were cut off before the Ark of the Covenant of the Lord , when it passed over Jordan . — And these Stones shall be a memorial unto the Children of Israel for ever . See also Exod. 10. 1 , 2. Joel . 1. 2 , 3 , 4. From all which it appears , how important and necessary a Duty it is , for Parents to acquaint their Children with the Providences of God ; a due sense whereof will , above all other things , tend to make them wise and good . Some Directions to Parents , how to render their Endeavours effectual . Now , to render your Admonitions and all other Endeavours effectual , for the good of your Children ; First , you must give them good Example ; when you bid them read , or pray , or partake of the Holy Sacrament , or attend the publick Worship , you must ( so far as is needful and fit ) do the same things your selves : When you exhort them to be humble , to be of a mild and gentle Temper , to bear patiently uneasie things , to be sober and temperate , to be Charitable to the Poor , to judge favourably of those who differ from them in small matters , not to be unkind or uncivil to any , tho' they agree not in their Opinion with them in some lesser points of Religion , but to love all those who fear and love God , and who are Followers of Jesus Christ. I say , when you direct and exhort your Children to do such things , you must joyn with your Instructions a suitable Example ; let it appear to them that you your selves are Humble , Mild , Patient , Sober , Charitable , Kind , and Loving to all who are sincerely Pious and Virtuous , without making any difference on the account of Indifferent things , I mean such things which God hath neither commanded nor forbidden . This is the only way to make your Instructions and Admonitions successful , when in this manner you go before them your selves , in the way wherein you desire them to walk . Children learn more by the Eye than by the Ear , if they see you do contrary to what you advise them , they will be apt to think you do not believe what you say ; or that you are very cruel and unmerciful towards them , to bind heavy Burdens upon them , and not to touch them your selves . And if you should constrain your Children to do what you do not your selves ; what would it signifie ? It would only make them Hypocrites and Dissemblers , to do that which they have no Heart unto , and which they are not perswaded to be their Duty . Such Children , when once the restraint and force which is upon them is removed , will be sure to give themselves the full swing in all manner of Folly ; they will do those things which they have seen in you , and learned by your Example . But if you shine before your Children in the constant Practice of true Piety , walking in the Fear of God , and in Obedience to all his Holy Commandments , your Example will propagate Religion more effectually than all the Admonitions and Instructions in the World. And besides , the Influence which your Pious Example is apt to have on your Childrens lives , this is the way for you to entail a Blessing on your Posterity . The Just Man , saith Solomon , Prov. 20. 7. walketh in his Integrity , his Children are blessed after him . And Psal. 112. 2. 't is said , His Seed shall be mighty upon Earth , the Generation of the Vpright shall Blessed . And Ex. 20. 6. God hath pr●●mised to shew Mercy unto Thousands 〈◊〉 them that love him , and keep his Co●●mandments . 2dly . Chuse good Co●●pany for your Childre● ( so far as you have oppo●●tunity and ability to 〈◊〉 it , ) otherwise , neither your Admo●●tions nor Examples will signifie muc●● Their ordinary Company , if naught● will pull down faster than you are a●● to build : Corrupt Nature is eas● drawn away by the Example and A●●lurements of Sinners ; This is like g●●ing down hill , which is easie , conside●●ing Mens natural bent an● Inclination * : Where●● Self-denyal and mortifyin● our Lusts and Passions , 〈◊〉 more difficult , especially at first , 〈◊〉 going up hill . When therefore yo● see your Children falling into the acquaintance of Vicious and Foolish Persons , delay not to rescue them fro● the Snare ; to break off their Famili●●rity , that they be not corrupted there●by , and utterly ruined . We see ho● careful People are to keep their Children from those who have the Small Pox , or any other infectious Distemper ; and yet what a strange madness is it for them to trust them to the Society of those , whose Lives and Manners are full of the deadly Poyson of Sin , which infects and kills the Soul. As you ought to do all you can , to preserve your Children from all sorts of vicious Company , so particularly from Flatterers . Endeavour to save them from this dangerous Snare , than which there can be nothing of more dreadful Consequence unto them . Such vile and servile Society will very quickly pull down all that you have built ; They will utterly corrupt your Children , and render their condition desperate . For when once they are under the power of Flatterers , the Gate is thenceforth shut against Truth , and against plain and upright dealing ; when their delight is only in those who praise and commend them in all they do or say ; when such who admire them , and who study nothing but to please them in every thing , right or wrong , are their only Favourites , to be sure they who are their Best and Wisest , and most Faithful Friends , who tell them the truth , and speak not so much what may be pleasing as what may be profitable unto them , will not be very welcome or acceptable to them . And because such Flatterers are found often amongst Servants , who in hope● of serving their covetous or ambitious , or perhaps other base and wicked designs , do make it their business , by all sorts of vile Compliances , to gain the Favour and Love of the Children of Richer or more Honourable Persons . Therefore 't is not only the Duty , but the Interest of Parents , to be very careful what Servants they receive into their Family , or what Persons they admit to stay in their House , knowing that , according to the Proverb , One Scabbed Sheep will infect the whole Flock . The Example of the Psalmist ought to be a Rule in this matter , Psal. 101. 6 , 7. Mine Eyes shall be upon the Faithful of the Land , that they may dwell with me : He that walketh in a perfect way , he shall serve me . He that worketh Deceit shall not dwell within my House ; He that telleth Lies shall not tarry in my sight . 'T will not be unfit in this place to mention what a * Famous Author reports of the Ancient Romans . 'T was their custom to make choice of an Elderly Kinswoman , of whose Probity and Discretion they had good assurance , to whom they committed the Charge of the Children . Her business was to keep them from hearing and seeing whatever tended to corrupt their Manners ; to direct them in such little Studies and Exercises , as were proper to their Years ; and to see that their Recreations and Divertisements were harmless and innocent , and that they were used and managed modestly and inoffensively . This course Cornelia took , says this Author , with her Sons the Gracchi , Aurelia with her Son Caesar , and Artia with her Son Augustus . The Fruit and Effect of which Method was this , The Spirits of the Children being kept pure and sincere , straight and upright , they were thereby made the more capable to receive Noble and Excellent Impressions , which way soever they applied their minds , whether to Military Arts , to the knowledge of the Laws , or the Study of Eloquence . But now ( says he , speaking of the Age in which he lived ) Children are entrusted to the care of a Grecian Girl ; and to one or other of the Servants , of most base and servile Qualities , by whose words and actions they are quite spoiled and utterly ruined . Neither are there any in the Family who make account what they say or do before them : And no wonder , says he , for the Parents themselves are so far from training them up to Modesty and Probity , that they accustom them to Wantonness and extravagant Liberty , by which means they grow Impudent and Impetuous , in the pursuit of their wild and foolish Humours and Inclinations . As this Rule of chusing good company for Children , is necessary to be followed at all times , so especially when Parents send their Children into Foreign Countries , when they are fit to Travel ; how careful should they be not to trust them to every body ? But to the Conduct of those who not only may be useful to advance them in the Knowledge of the World , to assist them in their Journeyings , to take care about their Lodging and Diet , to wait on them to visit great Men , to see fine Places , curious Fabricks , Famous Monuments , and Ancient Inscriptions , to learn the Language of the Country , and the different Modes and Fashions , the Government and Policy , and such like : But who likewise ( through the Blessing of God on their Endeavours , ) may preserve them from the Vices of those Countries where they Travel ; from those bad Customs to which they have a great Inclination : Who may make it their business to season their Minds with deeper and more lively impressions of Virtue ; to possess them with a mighty regard for such excellent Examples as they have occasion now and then to see ; to Fortifie them against the many wicked and dangerous Opinions and Practices they meet with ; to acquaint them chiefly with the wisest and best Men , by whose Conversation they may be improved in Wisdom and Virtue ; that they may return into their own Country with their Minds furnished with useful Notions , with solid Principles , and wise Observations ; that they may be able either in a more private way , or in a publick capacity , to do somewhat , not unworthy of those who have had such good occasions for improving themselves in those things which are excellent . To serve this design , Parents are to be careful of two things ; One is , That their Children Travel under the Conduct of a Person who is wise and prudent , and is of a sincere and solid Piety : If he be one that is either Foolish , or Prophane and Atheistical , his Company must needs be very hurtful and dangerous ; It may utterly 〈◊〉 the young Persons who are intrusted to him , tho' they have very good ●●clinations , and have been happy in a Religious Education . We see that a straight Twig , tied to that which is crooked , and stronger than it self , grows crooked also . What an unaccountable thing is it to think , that Men who are careful to have a skilful Groom to look to their Horses , should be so mad , as to venture their Children ( who are their chiefest Possession , and the principal Objects of their care and kindness ) into the hands of those who have little discretion , and less Piety ? The Second thing that Parents ought to be careful of , in this matter , is , That their Children do not Travel till they are come to somewhat of stayedness , and solidity of Judgment ; till their Understanding and Discretion is such , as may give ground to hope that their Travelling shall do them no hurt , but good . It is none of the wisest parts in some Parents , to send their Children too soon into Foreign Countries , before their Judgment is prepared , and made fit to make useful Reflections and Observations on the World ; before their minds are possessed with solid Principles of Virtue , and with a deep sense of Religion ; so as not to be in great danger from the temptations which they are sure to meet with in most places : Before they know any thing at home , it is too soon to send them abroad : Before they know themselves a little , it is not advisable to send them into the wide World , to know a vast multitude of other things : Hence it too often comes to pass , that a great many return , after their Travels , greater Fools than they went ; they bring back nothing but a load 〈◊〉 the Vices and Vanities of other Countries . Thirdly , Let not over-great fondness blind your Eyes , so as not to see the Faults of your Children ▪ nor cause you to stop your Ears against just complaints It 's true , there are some wicked People who love to sow Discord ▪ to kindle strife and contention ; to divide the nearest Relations : But all a●● not so very wicked ; you cannot bu● know some who love you and your Children sincerely ; and when such Persons tell you of their Faults , you ought to do the part of those who are wise , as well as kind Parents ; that i● you ought to do all you can to reform their Faults , and make them better and withal you ought to be heartil● thankful to those who do not flatter you and your Children , to the hurt bot● of you and them . In order to their Reformation , try first all gentle Methods to make them better : Endeavour to conquer them with the Weapons of Kindness and Affection ; endeavour by Instructions and Admonitions to make them sensible of their Faults ; Use Promises and Encouragements to allure them to do what they ought ; if these gentler Methods do not succeed , 't is fit to use Reproof , to rebuke them sharply : Reproofs of Instruction , saith Solomon , Prov. 6. 23. are the way of Life . When Threatnings are necessary , make use of them likewise ; and if they do not serve the turn , then try the Rod ; Chasten thy Son , says Solomon , Prov. 19. 18. while there is hope , and let not thy Soul spare for his crying . And Ch. 13. 24. he saith , He that spareth his Rod , hateth his Son , but he that loveth him , Chasteneth him betimes . But let this be always the last Remedy , after you have in vain attempted their Reformation by milder and gentler Methods . And when you use Severity , do it with due moderation , not exceeding the Quality of the Fault : Beware of using great Severity , when the Fault is very small and inconsiderable . Respect must also be had to the Age , Temper , and Disposition of your Children ; if they are very young and tender , your Correction must be the more gentle and moderate ; and if they are of a flexible and Ingenuous Temper , you must be the more Favourable towards them . Beware of correcting them when you find your Anger very hot , for then you are apt to do more hurt than good . Your Passion will hurry you , if you restrain it not , into somewhat or other very wicked , as well as indiscreet ; it will make you do and say a great many things very unworthy of a Christian. Always therefore be careful , that your Reason , and not your Passion , direct you in so important a matter as this is ▪ ●f once you fall into the rough , severe , and violent Method of dealing with your Children , there are a great many Disadvantages will attend it . First , You discourage your Children , you break their Spirits , you make them unfit for any useful thing ; you tempt them to do such things as are hurtful to themselves , and may prove grievous to you . If Oppression makes a wise Man mad ; 't is no wonder if a Child , or young Person , is sadly disordered , and made half mad by cruel and tyrann●c●l usage : Tho' it be a Fault in Children to be so ; yet Parents ought to be careful not to provoke them overmuch to wrath , by a severe , unmerciful carriage towards them . 'T is not the less important and true , because it is a common Observation , to wit , That a tender Sprig which grows crooked , may be made straight by little and little , if you bend it and handle it gently ; but if you bend it with great Force and Violence , you may quickly break it . Thus it is with Children generally , who discover very early somewhat of crookedness in their Nature , which is increased by evil Example ; if you use mild and gentle Methods to reform them , temper'd now and then , as need shall require , with a little severity , there is hopes , that , by degrees , they will be reformed , and made straight ; but if , instead of this moderate course , you use cruel Methods , and deal rigidly and unmercifully with them , you cannot expect any other , but that their Spirits should be broken or hardened , and so lose all sense of Ingenuity . Secondly , You kindle your own Passions , you disorder your minds , and accustom your selves to a fiery Temper , you become fierce , barbarous , and savage ; whereby you turn one of your great Temporal Comforts into a grievous Cross , and heavy Burden . Thirdly , You hereby likewise teach your Children , through your Example , to be of a passionate and violent Spirit ; and so you do them more hurt , than all your Corrections and Instructions can do them good : Never think to cure them of their Faults , by your committing as bad your selves : You must not do evil that good may come of it : The Wrath of Man worketh not the Righteousness of God. Fourthly , You make your Children care less for your Corrections , than otherwise they would do : When you are always beating them in your Passion , and tormenting them , they must needs think , that you do so , not so much for any Fault they are guilty of , as because you are very passionate , and therefore must give your Passion a vent one way or other . If therefore you would chasten your Children to good purpose , do it when your Spirits are cool , when your Reason is at hand to direct you , and to keep you within bounds , and not when you have lost your selves , by being under the Power of a violent Passion . If you are careful to follow this Christian Method , you may then expect that God's kind Providence will second you in your Endeavours for reforming your Children . Either they will grow better ; or however , you will find Peace and Comfort , when in this manner you govern your selves by the Laws of Religion , and are not led by your unruly Passion . That Parents may the better perform their Duty in correcting their Children , they ought to observe and imitate the Example of our Heavenly Father , who , tho' whom he loveth , he chasteneth , Heb. 12. 6. yet he doth not afflict willingly , nor grieve the Children of Men. Lam. 3. 33. He does not make use of the Rod , but when it is necessary , when his Mercy and Kindness do not prevail . And when he does correct , in the midst of Wrath , he remembreth Mercy . When he visits the Transgressions of his Children , with the Rod , and their Iniquity with Stripes : Nevertheless , his loving Kindness he does not take utterly from them , nor suffer his Faithfulness to fail . Ps. 89. 32 , 33. He is always ready to receive his penitent Children , to have Mercy upon them . He does not keep his Anger for ever . A due Consideration of these things will direct Parents how to correct their Children both as to Time and Measure . To what hath been said , it will not be unfit to add , That , to render Reproof , and Correction the more effectual , it is necessary that both Parents concur therein ; not as if it were proper for them both together , or one after another , to reprove or chasten their Children , for the same Fault , for this would be rather very improper for the most part : But when one of the Parents chides of corrects their Children , the other ought so far to concur , as to approve what is done , and shew their displeasure towards those Children who have done that which deserves Chastisement . They must not oppose one another in this matter ; when one reproves , the other must not approve and commend ; when one condemns , the other must not justifie ; when one endeavours to correct , the other must not hinder it ; Otherwise , the Children will be lost ; for it is not likely they will amend their Faults , if they see that either of their Parents is their Patron , to encourage and defend them , or to excuse and extenuate what they do amiss . They who are wise Parents , ought to be so far from doing this , that tho' one of them should happen to reprove or chasten a Child when there is no very great necessity for so doing , yet the other Parent , whether Father or Mother , ought to conceal their present thoughts , and wait a fit occasion to discourse the matter together , that such unnecessary Reproofs and Chastisements may be prevented for the future . If Parents do not carefully observe this Rule , their Children will be sure to take notice of their Indiscretion , and to make a very bad use of it , so as to despise their reproofs and chastenings , when they are more just and necessary . Fourthly , When it pleaseth God to visit them with sickness , or any other adversity ; be sure to do all that you can , to bear in upon their minds , a sense of those things you are most desirous to have them touched with , and which in time of their health they made but very little account of . Affliction is the time , in which God useth to work upon the hearts of People most powerfully and effectually ; then he awakeneth them , and convinceth them of their sad and dangerous state ; he casts them down , that being made sensible of their sin and danger , he may again raise them up , and speak comfortably to them . I will allure her , and bring her into the Wilderness , and speak comfortably to her , Hos. 2. 4. Therefore all they who sincerely desire to reclaim their Children , or others , from their bad and foolish courses , ought to take the opportunity of their Sickness , their Pain and Grief , their Losses and Disappointments , and of any other sorts of Troubles and Afflictions wherein they are , that then they may suggest to them such counsels and advices as are proper for their Instruction , their conviction and amendment . At other times , there are a great many things which are apt to hinder good Counsel from entring into the mind , or from making any deep impression thereon ; Pleasures and Vanities are apt to choak the good Seed : But when they are afflicted , and humbled a little by some outward pressure , or bodily distemper ; they are thereby somewhat better disposed to hear Friendly Admonitions and Counsels , and to think a little more seriously of their ways and doings . It is good for a Man that he bear the Yoke in his Youth ; He sitteth alone and keepeth silence , &c. Lam. 3. 27 , 28. When it hath pleased God to restore your Children to health , or to deliver them from any other Affliction , fail not to put them in mind of their afflicted Estate , and of God's goodness towards them when they were in adversity : Endeavour to make them sensible for what end God hath been so kind to them , to wit , that they may amend their Lives , and bring forth Fruits meet for Repentance . Strive to keep them mindful of their Purposes and Resolutions , and press them to the fulfilling of them . Stir them up to be thankful to God for his Mercy , and to be very watchful , lest Satan prevail over them any more . Fifthly , Be earnest in your Prayers to God daily for them ; that he would make them what he requires them to be , his dutiful and obedient Children and Servants ; that he would give them his Holy Spirit to sanctifie and cleanse them , to enlighten and direct them , and to assist and strengthen them ; that he would season their Hearts with his Fear and Love ; that he would turn them from Sin and Folly ; and incline their Hearts to keep his Precepts always , even unto the end ; that he would hold up their goings in his Paths , that their footsteps may not slide ; that he would be their God and Guide , their Sun and Shield , and their Portion for ever ; that he would give every one of them those things which be best and most needful for them ; that he would Sanctifie every State and Condition of Life , wherein his Providence doth place them . If they are in a healthful and prosperous State , pray to God to make them sensible of , and thankful for his undeserved goodness , and that he would preserve them from the snares and dangers to which Prosperity does expose them . You see what was Job's constant course at the end of his Childrens Feasting . Job . 1. 5. He sent and Sanctified them , and rose up early in the Morning , and Offered burnt Offerings according to the number of them all . For he said , it may be my Sons have sinned , and cursed God in their Hearts , &c. Again , if they are in Sickness , or any other Adversity ; beg of God to Sanctifie their Afflictions , to make them blessed and happy means of their Reformation , or of their Improvement in true Piety . When you are about to instruct , to admonish , to reprove , or to correct your Children , pray to God to direct you by his good Spirit , to do your Duty in an acceptable manner ; and that he would incline and dispose them to their Duty , and make them Gainers by what you do or say for their good . 'T is not always necessary for you , in every particular Admonition or Reproof , &c. which you use towards your Children , to make a Solemn Prayer , by retiring into your Closet ; this ought to be done upon extraordinary Occasions ; but ordinarily , it will suffice , if you lift up your Hearts unto God , in a short and fervent Ejaculation , for his Direction and Blessing in what you are to do or say to your Children . You have great encouragement to do this ; because you are assured that God heareth Prayer ; he hath said , Every one that asketh , receiveth . So that either he will grant your Children what you beg for them , or if they render themselves unworthy of the Mercy and Kindness of God , by their perverseness and stubbornness ; yet you are sure of one thing , that your Prayers are not lost ; they shall return into your Bosom : God will plentifully reward your Piety , your Charity , and Zeal , with more Grace here , and Glory hereafter . Now if it be the Duty of Parents , in this manner , to pray for their Children , what shall be said of those , who , instead of praying for their Children , curse them , and use fearful Imprecations against them ! How dreadful a thing is it for those to whom it belongs to bless their Children , instead of doing this , to curse them ! How unnatural a thing is it , instead of contributing to their Happiness , to do their utmost to make them Eternally miserable ! 'T is true , some Children are very perverse and wicked , guilty of great stubbornness and disobedience , and of great contempt aud neglect of their Parents : But yet for all this , Parents ought never to give over praying for them ; and if at any time , their Passion and discontent occasion in their minds any thing that looks like a tendency to evil wishes or Imprecations against their Children , let them with as great care endeavour to be delivered therefrom , as they would from Fire , if it broke forth in their Houses . And indeed , if they who have the worst Children , did but consider what woful Effects do often attend such rash curses † , they would beware of using them , though never so much provoked : It is very observable , that God often in his wrath and Vengeance heareth such Imprecations , when uttered by Parents * , whereby he sheweth his just Displeasure and Indignation both against them and their Children . From what hath been said , Parents may see what they must do , to render their Admonitions , and all their other endeavours effectual , for the good of their Children . Some Motives to excite Parents to do these things . Now to stir you up to perform these things ; Consider , first , it is the Will of God that you bring up your Children in his Fear , and acquaint them with his Holy Laws and Commandments . He who made you , requires you to do this ; he who preserves you and keeps you alive ; he who is your King and Lord , who has a right to your service , to all that you are able to do ; who is your Father in Heaven ; who daily takes care of you , and Loads you with his benefits ; who is the God of your Salvation ; who hath sent his Son into the World to die for you : It is even he who saith , Deut. 6. 6 , 7. And these words which I command thee this day , shall be in thine Heart . And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy Children , and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house , and when thou walkest by the way , and when thou liest down , and when thou risest up . And , Eph. 6. 4. And ye Fathers , provoke not your Children to Wrath , but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. 'T is He who Established a Testimony in Jacob , and appointed a Law in Israel : Which he Commanded our Fathers , that they should make them known to their Children : That the Generation to come might know them , even the Children that should be born : Who should arise and declare them to their Children . That they might set their hope in God , and not forget the Works of God ; but keep his Commandments : And might not be as their Fathers , a stubborn and Rebellious Generation , a Generation that set not their heart aright , and whose Spirit was not stedfast with God. Psal. 78. 5 , 6 , 7 , 8. If you then be the Subjects , the Servants , and the Children of the great God ; If you love and fear Him , as you ought to do , you will be sure to make it your Business to train up your Children in true Virtue and Piety ; to make them what God requires them to be , holy , as he who hath called them is holy , in all manner of Conversation ; you will excite them to strive to enter in at the strait gate ; To work out their Salvation with fear and trembling ; To remember their Creator in the days of their youth ; T● seek God while He may be found , and to call upon Him while he is near ; To love the Lord with all their heart , and the● Neighbours as themselves ; To endeavour to follow the Example of our Blessed Master , to Learn of him to be meek and lowly , to take up their Cross and to bear it patiently , to be zealous for the Glory of God , to abound in the work of the Lord , not to be weary in well-doing , but to grow in Grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. Secondly , Is not this a work worthy of all your care and pains , to save the Souls of those , who are parts of your selves , who derive their Being from you ? You are the Instruments not only of their being , but the means of conveying unto them natural defilement and corruption : And therefore you ought with a great deal of Zeal to endeavour to have their pollutions washed off by true unfeigned Repentance , and a hearty turning from Sin unto God ; by their putting off the works of darkness , and putting on the Armour of Light ; by their putting on the Lord Jesus Christ , and walking as he walked . Are you ready to do all that you can to make your Children Rich and Wealthy , Great and Honourable in the World ; And yet are you at so little pains to do that for them ▪ which tends to make them rich in Faith , and Heirs of a Glorious Inheritance ? You endeavour to acquaint them with those who may be useful to them in their worldly Affairs and Concerns ; And why do you not strive to acquaint them with God , their greatest and best Friend , who is sure to stand by them , to take them up , and to take care of them , when all forsake them , and turn their backs upon them ? Why do you not with greater earnestness endeavour to procure unto them his Friendship and Love , who is infinitely Powerful , and infinitely Good and Kind ; and therefore not only can , but will do for them exceeding abundantly above all that either you or they can think or ask ? Thirdly , The doing of this is attended with great Rewards , not only in another World ▪ but even in this Life . You cannot but find unspeakable Joy and Comfort , when you behold your Children walking in the Fear of God , going from Strength to Strength , and from Grace to Grace , that at last they may come and appear before the Lord in Sion . It will free you from a great many anxious thoughts about them for the time to come , when you know that they have God for their Friend , who will be a Guide and Buckler to them : What a great Satisfaction will it afford you , to think that they , for whom you make so great Provision , and are at so much pains , are Good and Wise , and in all Probability , will make good use of what is given them , or designed for them ? When you see them humble , of a mild and gentle Temper , ap● to bear uneasie things Meekly and Patiently ; when you see them Sober and Temperate , Charitable and Compassionate , Just and Upright , True and Faithful , Wise and Prudent , Devout and Religious , Zealous for the Honour of God , and studying daily to grow up in all Virtue and Piety ; how will this fill you with a Pleasure that cannot be expressed ? So true is it that is said by the Wise Man , Prov. 15. and 20. A Wise Son maketh a Glad Father . And Ch. 23. v. 24 , 25. The Father of the Righteous shall greatly rejoyce , and he that begetteth a wise Child shall have Joy of him . Thy Father and thy Mother shall be glad , and she that bare thee shall rejoyce . They who Plant an Orchard , are mightily pleased to see the young Trees prosper , grow regularly , and bear a great deal of good Fruit , this makes them reflect upon all their cost and pains with much satisfaction . How much greater must their Pleasure be , upon whom God hath bestowed Children , when they see them growing in Grace as they grow in Years ? When they behold them straight and upright in their Lives , pure and undefiled in the way , walking in the Law of the Lord , having Respect unto all his Commandments , flourishing in the Courts of the Lord , bringing forth the Fruits of Righteousness and true Holiness . Doubtless there is no Pleasure in any Earthly thing comparable to this of Religious Parents , when they are Happy in Pious and Virtuous Children . And as such Children are a great Comfort , and afford a Mighty Pleasur● to their Parents , so they are a great Honour , and a lasting Ornament unto them . What can be more for th● Glory of Parents , than to have thei● Children adorned with the Image o● God , cloathed with Virtue and Goodness as with a Garment ? This doth reflect somewhat of its Lusture and Beauty upon the Parents themselves , who have been , under God , the Instruments of making their Children Lovers and Followers of that which is good . All wise and good People , who observe the Truth and Faithfulness , the Justice and Uprightness , the Meekness and Modesty , the Prudence and Discretion , and the other Virtues which appear in Children , must needs conceive and entertain very respectful thoughts of the Parents themselves , by whose means the Children have been so Virtuously and Religiously Formed and Educated . But besides all that has been said , Good and Virtuous Children afford manifold Advantages to their Parents . The Psalmist ( Psal. 128. 3. ) compares them to Olive Plants round about the Table of their Parents ; that is , as Olive Plants are not only for Ornament , but of great use to those who possess them ; so good Children are not only Ornaments to their Parents , but very useful and profitable to them in many regards ; for example , they serve their Parents , they assist and help them in their Employment , they stand by them in their danger , and defend them , they provide for them in their want , they pray for them , and do many Important Offices to them ; so that no wonder if the Psalmist saith , Psal. 127. 5. Happy is the Man that hath his Quiver full of them ; they shall not be ashamed , but they shall speak with the Enemies in the Gate . That is , it makes Parents Couragious , it encourages them to appear in publick in their own just defence , when they have worthy Children to attend them , and to assist them against those who endeavour to wrong them . Fourthly , The benefit of the good Education of Children , is not confined to the Parents alone , but is extended both to Church and State , Families being the Nurseries both of one and t'other . 1 st . As to the Church , when Children are rightly educated in the Knowledge and Practice of true Religion , they will then be sure to observe all such things as tend to Peace , Unity , and Edification ; they will readily and gladly joyn in Religious Assemblies , and carefully avoid whatever tends to unnecessary Separation . Neither will they only joyn outwardly in Christian Assemblies , but will be careful likewise to do it sincerely , to Worship God in Spirit and in Truth ; and to hear his Word with great Reverence and Attention , with a great desire to know the Divine Will , and with a real and hearty design to do it . They will also observe all other Sacred Institutions , without consulting with Flesh and Blood. And as they will do those things themselves , so they will do what they can to engage others to do the like . And not only will they carry themselves as Christians in publick ; but likewise , in their several Relations and Capacities , wherein God hath placed them in the World , they will be careful to adorn their Christian Profession ; they will study to avoid whatever is contrary to true Piety ; they will Zealously endeavour to do all the good they can in the World : For which end , they will watch the most fit Occasions of doing good to the Souls of those they are acquainted with , and will be sure to comply with any favourable Opportunity of serving them , in those things which are for their Everlasting Happiness , which tend to make them wiser and better . How great a Blessing would it be to the Church , to have many such Persons of her Society ? And therefore , as the sense of this ought to excite Parents to do their utmost to Educate their Children in the Fear and Love of God : So it ought to stir up the Guides of the Church , to employ themselves Vigorously in dealing with younger Persons , to make them wise and good , in endeavouring all they can to beget in their minds a true Sense of Religion and Virtue , to possess them with the Knowledge and Love of God , to fortifie them against the many Temptations to Sin and Folly to which they are exposed : And , in a word , to make the● Followers of Christ in true Holines● in this World , and fit to live an● Reign with him in Glory in the Wor● to come . All who have dealt with Mankind about the concerns of another Life must needs lament , that very litt● can be done for reforming Aged People , who are hardned in Evil Habits and therefore , there is the greater nee● to deal in good earnest with young Persons , to prevent their being corrupted , and to lay in them the Foundatio● of solid Piety for the time to come . 2 dly . As to the State , it would likewise reap no small Benefit by th● right Education of Children . For 〈◊〉 As to those who are to Rule a●● Govern others , whether in an highe● or more subordinate Quality , if the● are happy in a Pious and Virtuous Education , if their minds are season● with Religious Principles , if they a●● possessed with a great Love to th● which is good , and with a great Abhorrence and Detestation of th● which is Evil ; if they are trained 〈◊〉 in the daily Practice of Modesty an● Humility , of Meekness and Patience , of Truth and Faithfulness , of Justice and Uprightness , of Brotherly Kindness and Charity , and of Temperance and Sobriety , &c. I say , if they who are to rule others , are Educated in this manner , there is great reason to hope , that they will prove great Blessings , in those publick Capacities , to which it shall please God to call them . Such Persons are likely to Minister Justice impartially , to encourage Piety and Virtue where-ever they see it , and to curb and restrain whatever is dishonourable to God , and unsuitable to the Christian Profession . Whereas , on the contrary , when they who are to rule others , are bred up in Idleness and Luxury , are gratified in their Vanity and Folly , are cherished in their Passions and Extravagancies , are accustomed to no Society but of trifling or Atheistical Persons , and are not employed in any useful sort of Business . I say , when they who are to rule others have such woful Education , what can be expected from them , but such things only , as are dishonourable to God , scandalous to Religion , and in many regards prejudicial to Mankind ? 2 dly . As for those of lower Quality , when once they are inspir'd with the Knowledge of Christian Principles , and when these have taken deep root in them , and have a due Influence upon them , they will not only teach them , but also engage them to Honour and Obey their Rulers , and that not only for Fear , but also for Conscience sake . As Christianity will make them give unto God the Things that be God's , so it will cause them to give unto Caesar the Things that be Caesar ' s. It will likewise make them true and sincere in all their words , just and upright in all their deeds , faithful and constant in all their Lawful Undertakings , and Charitable and Compassionate to every body in distress ; studious of Purity and Chastity , of Temperance and Sobriety , and of Peace and Concord : It will cause them , as much as is possible , to live Peaceably with all Men , to seek Peace , and to pursue it , to be Zealous Peace-makers , and to be ready to overcome ▪ Evil with Good ; It will direct them when their Neighbour or Friend is overtaken with a fault , to restore him with the Spirit of Meekness ; It will make them , not to seek their own things only , but likewise their Neighbours good as well as their own ; It will not only restrain them from what is manifestly evil , but will also make them careful to avoid every appearance of it , to shun the very thoughts and desire of Wickedness ; It will cause them to be content with what God bestows upon them , and not to envy others , not to covet their Goods , nor wrong them by word or deed . And , ●in a word , the lively Impressions of Religion will make them careful to keep their Consciences Void of Offence both towards God and towards Men. Now , if these Rules of our Holy Religion had their due Influence on the minds of People , what a Blessed and Happy Society would there be in the World ! How easie would every Man be ? How well-pleased ? How safe and secure from hurt and danger ? How confident in his Friends , Neighbours , and Acquaintance ? Knowing , and being well assured , that they fear and love God , and therefore will do no wrong . As the Consideration of these things , ought to make Parents very careful to do all that ever they can towards the right Education of their Children , so i● ought mightily to excite all Christian Rulers and Governours , to do their part in this matter , particularly to take care that there be Schools every where , and that such Persons be chosen to Educate Children at School , as not only are skilful to teach them to Read , Write , &c. But who may contribute likewise towards the seasoning their minds with Religious Principles , who will look upon it as one great part of their Business to endeavour to possess them with the Fear and Love of God. How worthy of Christian Magistrates were it also , to take care that all Schools and Colleges be visited often by fit Persons , that the Diligent may be encouraged , and that the Remiss and Negligent , or the Vicious and Prophane , may be discouraged by all Just and Lawful means . These things cannot be look'd upon as Forreign to the Magistrates Office , if it be but duely considered , how much Benefit comes to the State by the good Education of Children , and how much mischief cometh thereto , by the neglect of their Education . * Of old the Persians , Lacedemonians , Cretians , and others , thought it their Interest to see to the right Education of Children ; they did not think it safe , to leave so great a Trust wholly in the hands of Parents , who through Partiality , Fondness , or Indiscretion , might utterly spoil them , and thereby do unspeakable Mischief to the State. And no doubt , till once all Christian Rulers and Governours , both in Church and State , make it more their business to see to the right Education of Children , there is no great hopes of ever seeing any considerable Reformation in the World. Fifthly , If you neglect to do these things for the Souls of your Children , and leave them to themselves to do as they list , then you may expect that their Sins and Follies , their Pride and Passion , their Gluttony and Drunkenness , their Cursing and Swearing , their Lying and Deceiving , their Malice and Revenge , their Chambering and Wantonness , their Atheism and Irreligion , will not only prove Tragical to them , but occasion great uneasiness , Vexation , and Grief of Mind to you . Prov. 10. 1. A foolish Son is a heaviness to his Mother , and Chap. 17. 21. He that begetteth a Fool , doth it to his Sorrow , and the Father of a Fool hath no Joy. 'T is true , 't is not in the Power of Parents to infuse good Qualities into the minds of their Children ; some are so very perverse , that all that can be said or done by Parents , is altogether slighted , and neglected by them : We know that Abraham had an Ishmael as well as an Isaac ; and Isaac an Esau as well as a Jacob ; and Jacob a Reuben as well as a Joseph . However , such Parents who have the affliction of sad and wretched Children , have some comfort and satisfaction in having done their Duty for them , and in endeavouring to approve themselves unto God , who will accept of their honest and sincere endeavours ; and will crown them with glorious Rewards . But it is otherwise , when Children prove bad through the too great Indulgence , or the Negligence , and bad Example of Parents . What a deep wound must it needs give them , when they begin to consider that they did not their part to make their Children good , and were so far from it , that they corrupted and ruined them by their bad Example , and over great kindness and indulgence ? Such Parents do often eat the Fruits of their cruel fondness , and feel the sad Effects of their own bad Example , by means of their Prophane and Graceless Children . As God doth often visit the Iniquity of the Parents upon the Children ; so when Children are suffered to go on in their foolish and wicked courses , through the indiscreet gentleness and kindness of Parents , who , perhaps , are in other respects good People ; the Lord doth sometimes punish such Parents , and bring Temporal Judgments upon them . Ely was a great instance of this , 1 Sam. 2. and 22. He heard all that his Sons did unto all Israel ; which were things of a very vile Nature , whereby , as it 's said Chap. 3. and 13. they made themselves vile , that is , hateful to God , and base and contemptible to all the People , by their lewd and abominable Practices . Ely did reprove them , but it was too coldly and gently . Chap. 2. 23 , 24 And he said unto them , Why do you such things , for I hear of your evil dealings by all this People : Nay , my Sons ; for it is no good Report that I hear ; you make the Lord's People to transgress . Besides his reproof , he ought to have restrained them , Ch. 3. and 13. as being High Priest , a Judge , and Chief Governour amongst the People : He ought to have put them out of the Priesthood , as accurssed Persons , and Executed the Laws of God against them . Which because he did not , therefore God denounced very dreadful Judgments against him by a Prophet , whom he sent unto him , Chap. 2. 31 , 3● , 33 , 34 , 36. and Chap. 3. 13 , 14. And in Chap. 4. we find his two Sons Hoph●● and Phineas were slain in Battel by the Philistines , and the Ark of God was taken ; upon the news whereof , the Old Man fell from off his Seat backwards , and his Neck brake , and he died . We see likewise in David , what was the Effect of his too great indulgence to some of his Children ; especially Absalom and Adonijah , who not only wrought their own destruction , but proved great Crosses to their aged Father . Here it will not be unfit to relate what St. Augustin tells us of the sad Effects of leaving a Child to himself , and not endeavouring to Educate him aright . The Story is this . * There was one Cyril , a Citizen of Hippo , who having one only Son , was so fond of him , that he avoided doing or saying any thing that tended to make his Son uneasie : The young Man finding himself at Liberty ( through his Father's Indulgence ) to live as ▪ he thought good , gave up himself to all manner of Folly , particularly to Drunkenness . Notwithstanding this , his Father still continued to be as fond as ever , and would not do any thing to restrain him from doing what he had a mind to . The consequence whereof was very dreadful and terrible ; for a little time after , this wretched Son coming home very drunk , killed his Father , as also his Mother then big with Child ; he attempted to have Ravished his Sisters , of whom two were Mortally Wounded by him . Such sad Examples as these ought to awaken Parents to do what they can to Educate their Children in the Fear of God , to train them up in the Study and Practice of true Piety , and to restrain them by all due means from Sin and Folly. Which things if they fail to do , they may expect sooner or later , to reap the Bitter and Cursed Fruits of so sad a Neglect . Advice to Parents . PART II. The Duties of Parents as to their Childrens Bodies . HAving treated of the Duty of Parents towards their Children , as to their Souls , the better part ; I shall next shew what their Duties are , as to the Bodies of their Children . First , It belongs to the Mother to give suck to her Children ; unless some bodily Imperfection , great Weakness , or Sickness , or her circumstances in the World , make it impossible , or very dangerous and inconvenient both for her and the Children , or for either . For this end it is that God hath given Breasts unto Women , and caused the Milk to flow into them , that there may be nourishment suitable to the tender Infants , in a readiness for them . Neither can we suppose any other body capable of shewing equal Care and Love to the Children , with that which it is natural for the Mother to express to the Fruit of her own Womb. Besides this , it cannot well be imagined , that the Milk of any other Body can be so fit for the Child as its own Mothers , if she be but in tollerable Health . We see that Sarah did not think that the greatness of her Quality , or her great Age , did excuse her from this Natural Obligation , of giving Suck unto her Child . Gen. 21. 7. And she said , who would have said unto Abraham , that Sarah should have given Children Suck ? For I have born him a Son in my Old Age. Which words suppose it to be the unquestionable Duty , as well as common Practice of Mothers , to give Suck to their Children . When God chose a Nurse for Moses , ( Exod. 2. 8. ) he led the Handmaid of Pharaoh's Daughter to the Child's Mother . We find that amongst other Characters of a Woman , that was fit to be taken into the number of Widows , there was this , If she hath brought up Children , ( 1 Tim. 5. 10. ) or , as the words may be Translated , If she has nourished or fed her Children . It was reckoned as a sign of God's Wrath , Hos. 9. 14. To have dry Breasts . And therefore , they cannot be accounted Innocent , who , without apparent Necessity , dry up their Breasts , and so deprive their Children of that Food and Nourishment which Nature designed for them . The words of the Psalmist David , Psal. 22. 9. do not only imply that his Mother gave him Suck , but they also shew , that it was the practice of all Mothers , to do the like to their Children . Thou didst make me hope , saith he , when I was upon my Mother's Breasts . Solomon likewise takes it for granted , that Children of the same Womb , should Suck of the same Breasts . Cant. 8. 1. O that thou wert as my Brother , that Sucked the Breasts of my Mother . To all which might be added , the words of the Woman to our Saviour , Luke 11. 27. Blessed is the Womb that bare thee , and the Paps which thou hast Sucked . Which words suppose , that she who bare him , did also give him Suck . We find that amongst the very Heathens , they were accounted but half Mothers , who neglected to give Suck to their Children . One of their Ancient Authors * speaking on this Subject , saith , How unnatural a thing is this , how imperfect , and only to be a Mother by halves , having brought forth a Child , presently to throw it away ? having nourished in her Womb somewhat that she could not see , not now to nourish it with her Milk , when she sees it alive , and calling for her Assistance ? We see likewise , that Nature hath impressed on the most Savage and wild Creatures , a readiness to draw out their Breasts to their young , Lam. 4. 3. Even the Sea Monsters draw out the Breast , they give Suck to their young ones . And shall Women degenerate into such unnatural Barbarity towards their young , as is not to be met with amongst the most Savage Creatures ? Shall they , whose Love and Tenderness has been so noted and admired , prove unkind and cruel to the fruit of their own Womb ? 2 dly . When Children are fit for stronger Food , Parents are not to indulge them too much , in gratifying the curiosity and daintiness of their Palate , which not only is apt to make them too soft and tender ; but likewise disposeth them to Gluttony and Sensuality ; to make their Belly their God. It is fit to accustom them to a plain and simple Diet ; which is generally more wholsome than that sort of Food which is very artificially prepared . The State of all Humane Things is very uncertain ; they who have at present all manner of things in greatest plenty and variety , may meet with changes and vicissitudes : It 's therefore a part of the Wisdom of Parents , to accustom their Children ( so far as their Health and Strength can bear it ) to eat any sort of Food ; that so , if God sees fit to change their outward condition and circumstances , they may be the more fit and able to endure such an alteration . Thirdly , As to the● Habit and Apparel : Parents ought to cloath● them decently , but not gorgeously : Fineries and Gayeties 〈◊〉 Apparel are apt to make People ▪ especially younger Persons , vain 〈◊〉 conceited , to value themselves upo● their gay Cloathing . It is fit ofte● to suggest to them , that their Cloath● and Apparel are but borrowed Feathers ; and therefore that it is a grea● Folly to be proud of that which is 〈◊〉 their own , but which they owe to th● Sheep or Goats , to the Worms 〈◊〉 Bowels of the Earth . It is not fit for Parents to make too great distinction among their Children , as to their Apparel ; because this is apt to cause discontent● and Jealousies , Hatred and Envy ▪ Contentions and Quarrellings among●● them . Joseph's Coat of many colours which his old Father Jacob gave him caused his Brethren to hate and en●● him , and at last to conspire most wickedly against him , Gen. 37. 3 , 4 , &c. The same is to be said as to their Diet , and other things , wherein it is no small part of the Wisdom of Parents , not to shew too much fondness to one above all the rest . This does not hinder , but that Parents may , to very good purpose , give Rewards to their Children for their Acts of Virtue , for their ready and chearful Obedience to their Commands ; for their diligence and care in performing what was appointed them , &c. Whereby they who do such things are encouraged , and they who do not , but are careless and negligent , are punished , and spurred up to amend their Faults . But when such marks of Favour are bestowed , 't is fit to let the rest know , that if they do as well , they also shall have a Reward : By which means they will see that Virtue and Goodness are the things which their Parents love and esteem most ; and for which they are ready to bestow the marks of their Affection . The Duty of Parents as to the outward Estate of their Children . A Third thing that belongs to the care of Parents , is , the outward Estate of their Children . First , When they are fit for a Trade , they ought to chuse an honest Employment for them : To suffer them to live in Idleness , is to ruin them : If they have not some useful thing or other to take up their thoughts , they are in great hazard of finding somewhat to do which is bad , and hurtful both to themselves and others . The Devil is always at hand to furnish Occasions to idle People , for employing themselves to their own destruction . The Athenians ( who for a great while were reckoned amongst the wisest People in the World , ) were so sensible of the necessity and importance of Childrens being bred up to some Lawful Trade and Employment , that by their Laws * they obliged them to maintain their Parents , and to supply them in their old Age , only upon this supposition , that their Parents had been careful to teach them an honest Trade : Otherwise by their Laws , Children were not bound to provide for them . Tho' this is not to be brought into Practice amongst Christians , it being contrary to Christian Principles , for Children upon any Pretence whatsoever to neglect their Parents in distress . Yet this Example sheweth , how great a Crime it was reckoned amongst the wiser Heathens , for Parents not to breed up their Children to some honest Employment . As to the particular kind of Employment , wherein Children are to spend their days , it is to be left to the discretion and prudence of Parents : They are so to instruct and dispose the minds of their Children , that they may be ready to be determined to any Trade or manner of Life that 's honest , which their Parents think best and meetest for them to follow : But yet a great regard is to be had to the particular Genius and Inclination of Children , which ordinarily disposeth them more for one sort of Employment than another : It will make them more diligent in learning their Trade , when they have a delight in it : Otherwise , if they are put forth to a Trade against their minds , they are more likely to neglect it , or to break off from it . Seldom do such Persons attain unto great Perfection in their Employment , who follow it against the Grain . As for those whose great and plentiful Estate in the World doth raise them above the necessity of putting forth their Children to a Trade , they ought notwithstanding to be careful to bring them up , not in Idleness and Vanity , but in such Studies and Exercises , as are most proper for them , and which tend to make them serviceable in their Generation * . When God created Adam after his own Image , and placed him in the Garden of Eden , which , no doubt , was the most Honourable State that ever Man was in upon Earth , yet he did not suffer him to live in Idleness , He appointed him an Employment , to wit , to dress and keep the Garden . The greater that Mens Possessions are , they ought to be so much the more concerned in the right Education of their Children , that so they may be made the more fit to Inherit their Wealth and Riches . How much reason had the Philosopher Crates to say , * that if he might , he would go up unto the highest place of the City , and there bespeak the Citizens in this manner . O Men ! what mean ye to be 〈◊〉 so much pains , and so incessantly to busie your thoughts , how to heap up Wealth and Riches ; and yet to take so little care of your Children , to whom you are to leave all these things ! Upon which , Plutarch hath this wise Reflection : That such Parents are very like those Foolish People , who have a great deal of care of their Shoe , but none at all of their Foot. Great and Rich Men , therefore , ought to be very careful that their Children be well Educated ; that they be instructed in useful Arts and Sciences , which may not only afford Pleasure and Delight unto their minds , but may be of use and advantage to them in their Conversation in the World. Above all , they ought to endeavour , that their Childrens minds be possessed with a lively sense of Religion , with sincere Love to God , with a fervent Zeal for his Glory , with a great delight in all those things which are truly Noble and Worthy , which tend to the Honour of God , and the Benefit of Mankind , and with an utter abhorrence and detestation of all wicked Practices , of Prophane and Atheistical Company , and of every appearance of Evil ; they ought to train them up in useful and pious Actions and Designs , which may be of Advantage to Church or State , that so they may prove a Blessing to the World , and Pillars of that Society to which they belong . Great care ought to be taken , to make them understand the Vanity of Riches and Honour , the great uncertainty and mutability of the things of this World , and the many Tentations and Vexations which attend a plentiful Estate and great Fortune . Endeavour to make them sensible , that no Earthly Enjoyments are capable to satisfie their desires ; that , as the wise Man saith , Eccles. 5. 10. He that loveth Silver , shall not be satisfied with Silver ; nor he that loveth Abundance , with Increase : And that they are so far from satisfying the mind , that they distract it , and oftentimes fill it with greater uneasiness ; that they occasion Cares , and Fears , and Temptations and Sorrows . Shew them likewise , that these outward and perishing things add nothing of real worth unto them , that a Hundred or a Thousand a Year cannot make them one whit either wiser or better ; that their Estates cannot keep off Sickness or Pain , nor sad and sudden Accidents ; and that they cannot defend them so much as one moment , from the approaches of the King of Terrors . Shew them , what was the Psalmist's Opinion of outward Greatness , himself being one of the greatest Men of his time , and therefore able to judge o● the matter : Surely , says he , Psal. 62 9. Men of high degree are a Lye ; to be laid in the Ballance , they are altogether lighter than Vanity . Grea● Me● are a Lye ; that is , they are not either what their own Vanity would make them , or what Foolish People imagine them to be , to wit , another sort of Beings than other Men. Thi● is but a Lye , for they are the same thing with the poorest Beggar , they are of the same Mould , they have the same Passions , they are subject to the same distempers , they are liable to the same accidents and mischances , they are exposed to most part of the same Temptations , and to a great many more , which made Agur in his Prayer ▪ Prov. 30. 8 , 9. to say , Give me 〈◊〉 Riches , lest I be full , and deny thee , 〈◊〉 say , who is the Lord. Shew them likewise , For what 〈◊〉 it is that God bestoweth Riches a●● Honour upon them , that it is not 〈◊〉 gratifie their Lusts and Passions , to Indulge themselves in Vanity and Folly , an● to have wherewith to give themselves the full swing in whatever is suitable to thei● corrupt Inclinations ; that it is not 〈◊〉 take to themselves a Liberty to wo● wickedness , to trample upon whatever is Sacred , to countenance and patronize those who are prophane Mockers of Religion , who scof● at the most Sacred things thereof . Shew them that it is for better purposes , that the great Lord of the World bestows Riches , Power , and Honour on the Sons of Men , even that they may employ themselves , and all they have , for his Honour and Glory . Shew them , that to whom much is given , of them much shall be required ; That God doth expect greater Service from those , upon whom he bestows greater Encouragements : And therefore , that they ought to employ themselves as much as they can , in doing his Will , and Glorifying his Holy Name ; that they ought to encourage Religion , to countenance those who are Pious and Devout , to set a Mark of Respect upon those who fear and love God , and to testifie their dislike of those who are Prophane and Irreligious , to endeavour to curb and restrain them , so far as they are able ; and that they ought to make it appear , that there is no way for any body to recommend themselves so effectually to their ●●vour and Esteem , as by their behaving themselves as the Followers of Jesus Christ ought to do . Shew them also , how much Persons of meaner Quality are influenced and led by the Example of those who are Great and Noble , whose Actions are generally of greater force than Laws are with them * : That therefore , they ought to shine before them in all the Actions of true Piety and Virtue , that others , by seeing their good works , may be excited to imitate them , and so to Glorifie their Father that is in Heaven . Lastly , Shew them , that if they are Wicked and Prophane , and so by their bad Example defile and corrupt others , then God will require at their Hands the Blood of those many Souls , who perish by following their Foot-steps , and walking after them in their Ungodly ways . In this manner , they who are Rich , Great , and Honourable , who have no need to chuse a Trade for their Children , ought nevertheless to teach them , ( and that so much the more carefully ) such things as may make them truly wise and good . As for those who intend to set apart one or more of their Children for the Holy Ministry , they ought , 1 st . to be careful to serve God with the best they have . For Cursed be the Deceiver , which hath in his Flock a Male , and Voweth and Sacrificeth unto the Lord a corrupt thing . Mal. 1. 14. They ought to Consecrate to this Sacred Office those of their Children who are most worthy in all respects , who have not only good parts , but who have also good Inclinations , and are apt to receive Religious Impressions . 'T is an argument they very little understand the greatness and difficulty of the Pastoral Office , and have very little Sense of Religion , who think that God may be put off with any thing , and that the Refuse of the Flock is sufficient to be an Offering to him . How great Ingratitude is there in this ? Have not Parents received from God freely and undeservedly , all the good things they enjoy , and particularly their Children ? When therefore they design to bestow one or other of them for his more immediate Service , they ought to give him the best , and not such a one as is unfit to be employed in any other ordinary business , which requires a Person of tolerable Sense and Discretion . 2dly . They ought to have a single Eye to the Glory of God , and not to govern themselves by Worldly and Carnal respects and considerations . They must not look upon the Ministry , as if it were only a Trade to get Wealth and Riches , or as a way to come to Honour , and to obtain Preferment in the World. They ought to look upon this Holy Office with another Eye , to wit , as it is appointed of God for Divine and Spiritual ends , to guide and direct Men in the way to Happiness , to shew them what they must do to obtain Everlasting Happiness , and to avoid Hell and Destruction , to teach them how to fight the good fight of Faith , how to resist the Devil , how to overcome the World , and how to be preserved from their deceitful and desperately wicked Hearts . They ought to consider , that Christ's Ministers are appointed to be Shepherds and Watchmen , to feed and to watch over the Flock , which he hath purchased with his Blood ; to acquaint People with their danger ; to call upon them early and late ; to be upon their Guard , to quit themselves like Men , to be strong in the Lord and in the power of his Might . They must consider that it belongs to the Ministers of the Gospel to deal impartially with all sorts of People , and not to suffer Sin upon them , but to reprove them plainly , to exhort them seriously to repent and amend ; and to direct them what they are to do for the time to come , lest they fall again into the same evil Practices and Customs . When therefore Parents design a Child for the Holy Ministry , they should at the same time consider , that he is to spend himself in the work of the Gospel , that is , he must Study , and Pray , and Watch , and Preach , and Visit , and Converse , and do ▪ all other things which are needful to save Souls ; he must be instant in season and out of season ; he must often and seriously consider what is farther to be done to convert Sinners , to instruct the Ignorant , to comfort the Afflicted , to relieve the Poor , to excite the Remiss and Negligent , to encourage the Diligent , to strengthen the Weak , to confirm the Strong , to direct the Zealous , to reclaim the Erroneous , to convince Gainsayers , to put to silence the Ignorance of Foolish Men : And besides all this , he must be ready and willing to Sacrifice his life in the Service of his Great Master , if he be called thereto ; he must count nothing too dear , that he may finish his Course with Joy , and approve himself to the great Shepherd and Bishop of Souls . Thus Parents , when they design any of their Children for the Holy Ministry , ought to consider that they are to be employed in the greatest , the most painful , and most dangerous work in the World , and therefore , 3 dly . They ought to do all that in them lies , to fit and prepare such Children , that they may undertake this Sacred Employment as they ought to do . More than ordinary care is to be taken that their minds be furnished with good Impressions , that they be inspired with a great Love to God , and with a mighty Zeal for his Honour and Glory . They must be daily trained up in the Practice of Humility , of Meekness , of Patience , of Temperance , of Charity , and of all other Virtues and Graces ; they must be kept from seeing and hearing bad things , so far as may be ; their minds must be strongly fortified against Temptations : and all that is possible must be done , to keep them from the danger that comes from evil Company , and corrupt Example . They must be entrusted to the good Conduct of Excellent and Worthy Persons , by whose means they may be formed to as high a sense of true Piety as may be , that so , when they come abroad into the World , their light may shine before others . If Parents , who dedicate their Children to the Holy Ministry , would , in this manner , endeavour to act the part of Men who have a lively sense of God upon their Souls , who are possessed with a mighty Zeal for his Glory , and are earnestly desirous to promote the Kingdom of Jesus Christ , we might hope to see very speedily the Blessed Effects of their Pious Endeavours , Religion would flourish more than it does at this day , and Impiety and Irreligion would not so much Triumph as , alas ! they do . Secondly , When they are fit for Marriage , Parents are so to dispose of them , as that in all likelyhood they may be happy in such a state of Life : * They are not to constrain then to marry against their Will ; for such Marriages are seldom Happy ; they end too often in somewhat or other very Tragical and Calamitous , to one or t'other Party , if not to both . Great care is to be taken , that there be not too great inequality of outward state and condition ; for that occasions often neglect and contempt of the Person that is Inferiour to the other in some External Advantages : Nor yet too great Inequality of Years ; for that doth likewise , sooner or later , cause an Abatement and Decay , and sometimes an utter Extinction of that Respect and Love which is necessary to make those who are Married Happy . Parents are not , in disposing of their Children in Marriage , to govern themselves wholly by their respect to Riches and Honour ; but are to have a regard to Virtue and Goodness , so far , as to prefer one who is Discreet and Wise , of a Virtuous and good Disposition , to another that is foolish , or indiscreet , and Prophane and Atheistical , tho' attended with greater degrees of Wealth and Earthly Honour . * 'T is reported of Themistocles , a Famous Athenian Captain , that when several young Men came i● Suit of his Daughter , he preferred one who was a Wise and Virtuous Person , to another that was very Rich. When some People wondered at this choice , he told them , he had rather have a Man without Money , than Money without a Man. What a great reproach is it to our Religion , to think that so many Parents , in disposing of their Children , only consider how much Wealth they may have , and what Friends and Alliances they may make , by marrying into such a Family ? or what Profits and Preferments may be expected thereby ? As for any other thing , they do not much trouble their heads about it : They know no other Happiness but in the things of this life , and therefore they seek nothing else for their Children , but to make them Great and Wealthy ; * by which means it often comes to pass that they bring their Children into a most miserable and unhappy state of life , in which they must pine away their days in Sorrow and Grief , in the company of Foolish and Wicked Wretches , who are often in a fury and rage , who spend their time in Gaming and Drinking , in Cursing and Swearing , in Quarrelling and Fighting , in Whoring and Ranting and such like woful doings ; which cannot but prove to those , who have any the least degree of real goodness , so very uneasie and afflictive , that Wealth and Riches can make no amends for them . Such unfortunate Persons cannot but often envy ▪ the happiness of those who are in a very poor and low Estate and Condition , but yet live in Peace and Quietness , in Love and Concord , and in the fear of Cod ; and so enjoy real satisfaction and contentment , and have a great deal of Comfort to sweeten their outward Wants and Necessities . For as the Wise Man says , Prov. 15. 16 , 17. Better is little with the fear of the Lord ; than great Treasure , and Trouble therewith . Better is a Dinner of Herbs where Love is , than a stalled Ox , and Hatred therewith . But besides all this , it too often falls out , that they who are given in Marriage to Vicious and Profligate Persons , are , sooner or later , involved in those Judgments , which are caused by the Sins and Follies of the Persons to whom they are matched . 'T is true , such Persons have a great deal to support their Spirits , if they have not been Partakers with them in their works of Darkness : In this case , there is no doubt but their Merciful and Gracious God will order what they suffer for their good . But , alas ! it too often comes to pass , that they who are unequally yoked , either with Persons of a false Religion , or of a Wicked Life , do by degrees degenerate from their strict and Virtuous Education : Tho' formerly they seemed to have a right sense of Religion , and a great Inclination to the best things , yet sooner or later , by the Example and Perswasions of their Irreligious and Atheistical Relatives , they lose all sense of God , and give up themselves to all manner of Wickedness . 'T is said of Jehoram , who was Educated under a Religious Father , Jehosaphat , 2 Chron. 21. 6. That he walked in the way of the Kings of Israel , like as did the House of Ahab , for he had the Daughter of Ahab to Wife , &c. Where 't is very observable , that this unequal Marriage of Jehoram , is noted as the cause of his great Wickedness . And from the following Verses it appears , how many heavy Judgments fell upon him for his Impiety . To what hath been said may be added , that the hurt and inconvenience attending such Marriages , does not only affect the Married Persons themselves , but likewise extends to their Off-spring and Posterity , who are in great danger of being corrupted , as to their Religion and Manners , by the Influence and Example of their Parents . 'T is observed as one principal cause of the Wickedness of Rehoboam , ( 1 Kings 14. 21. ) That his Mother was an Ammonitess ; which is repeated , v. 31. to shew us that 't is a matter which deserves to be taken notice of . To the same purpose 't is said of Ahaziah King of Judah , ( 2 King. 8. 27. ) That he walked in the way of the House of Ahab , and did Evil in the sight of the Lord , as did the House of Ahab ; for he was the Son in Law of the House of Ahab . Thirdly , Parents are to provide for them , if they can , somewhat that may be a Foundation for their Comfortable Subsistance in the World ; which by the Blessing of God on their Callings , may be improved towards their living decently and honestly . For this end , they ought to keep within Compass , and to avoid all vain and unnecessary expences . Parents ought to lay up for the Children , says the Apostle , 2 Cor. 12. 14. And 2 Tim. 5. 8. He that provideth not for his own , is worse than an Infidel . Parents are not to propose to themselves , the rendring their Children very Great and Rich : But as they themselves having Food and Rayment , are to be therewith content ; so , if they can get Necessaries for their Children , they ought to rest satisfied , and be thankful . Our Life ( that is , the happiness of our Life ) doth not consist in the abundance of the things we possess , Luke 12. 15. Tho' you are to provide for your Children , yet you are not , out of too great thoughtfulness about the time to come , to restrain your selves from doing all necessary Offices of Charity to the Poor , who do now stand in need of your help : Never neglect a present Duty for fear of an uncertain inconvenience : You are forbid to take thought for the Morrow , Mat. 6. 34. But you are required to do good to all Men , while you have opportunity , Gal. 6. 10. To cast your Bread upon the Waters : to give a Portion to seven , as also unto eight , because you know not what evil there may be in the Earth , Eccles. 11. 1 , 2. This is the way to lay up Treasures for your Children ; to entail upon them great Blessings ; to make God their Guardian ; to leave them to his Merciful and kind Providence , and to his Almighty Protection . Psal. 37. 25 , 26. I have been young , and now am old ; yet have I not seen the Righteous forsaken , nor his Seed begging Bread. He is ever Merciful and lendeth , and his Seed is Blessed . So that by your Bounty and Charity , you bring your Wares to a good Market , you put forth your Money into God's hands , who will not fail to repay it with Usury . For as the Wise Man saith , He that hath Pity upon the Poor , lendeth unto the Lord , and that which he hath given will he pay him again . Prov. 19. 17. The Liberal Soul shall be made fat , and he that watereth , shall be watered also himself , Prov. 11. 25. He that gives to the Poor shall not lack , Prov. 28. 27. And Deut. 15. 10. it is written , Thou shalt surely give him , ( to wit , thy poor Brother ) and thy heart shall not be grieved , when th●● givest unto him ; because that for this thing , the Lord thy God shall bless thee ▪ in all thy Works , and in all that th●● puttest thine hands unto . And in the Epistle to the Hebrews , chap. 6. v. 10. it is said , God is not unrighteous to forget your Work , and Labour of Love , which you have shewed towards his Name , in that you have ministred to the Saints , and do minister . From all which it appears , that Charity and Liberality are the best Husbandry . As you are to beware , lest your care for your Children , make you neglect necessary Duties of Charity ; so you are to take heed , lest you use any unlawful Method to get Wealth to bestow upon them : This is not a way to make them Rich ; for such Riches seldom prosper : There is a Curse which attends all unlawful Gain , and like a Canker eats it out , and consumes it . All Ages and Places afford Examples , which confirm this Observation . Wealth gotten by Vanity , saith Solomon , shall be diminished , Prov. 13. 11. And again , Prov. 10. 3. He saith , Treasures of Wickedness profit nothing . And Jer. 17. 11. 't is said , As the Partridge sitteth on Eggs , and hatcheth them not , so be that getteth Riches and not by right , shall leave them in the midst of his days , and at his end shall be a Fool. A small Estate got honestly , is a hundredfold better than a vast and plentiful Estate purchased by unrighteous Methods . A little , saith the Psalmist , Psal. 37. 16. that a Righteous Man hath , is better than the Riches of many Wicked . And , Better , saith Solomon , Prov. 16. 8. is a little with Righteousness , than great Revenues without Right . As it is the Duty of Parents by all Honest and Lawful ways , to provide somewhat for their Children , and to preserve it for them ; so they ought in due time to bestow upon them more or less of what they have acquired and purchased , and not wholly to delay the doing of this until their own Decease . They ought , so far as they can , to afford their Children whatever their present Necessities or their Lawful Occasions do require : And the more Virtuous and Industrious they see their Children , they ought to give them so much the more liberally , that they may have not only what is absolutely necessary for them , but likewise , what they may improve for the bettering their Estate in the World ; that they may live decently , and may also have somewhat wherewith to help and relieve others . How great a Reproach is it to some Persons , who have a great deal of wealth , out of a woful covetous Temper to suffer their Children to go in Rags , and to depend upon the Charity or good Nature of others , for a piece of Bread ! Such Parents must needs be very unnatural , whose Bowels are not stirred with Compassion towards their Children , when they see them in distress and want ; and who do not all they can for their necessary Supply and Assistance . But , tho Parents ought to give their Children chearfully and seasonably more or less of their Worldly Goods , yet they must have a care , lest out of an indiscreet fondness , they give them more than their own circumstances will permit . How many sad Examples are there of Children , who have either wholly neglected their Parents , or who have not cared for them as they ought to have done , so soon as they were put into the Possession of their Estate and Fortune ? Whereas formerly , they seemed to carry themselves with all possible Duty and Affection , no sooner did their Parents bestow all they had ( or at least , the greatest part ) upon them , but they begun to grow Insolent towards them , and went on to so great a height of undutifulness , that their poor Parents were forced to leave them , and thenceforth to live in a very melancholly and mournful condition . 'T is therefore the Wisdom of Parents , so to give their Children , as still to reserve to themselves what is needful for their own support : They ought rather to keep their Children in a dependance upon them , than that they should depend upon their Children . To this purpose is the Advice of the Son of Syrach , Ecclesiasticus 33. 18 , 19 , &c. Hear me , O ye great Men of the People , and hearken with your Ears , ye Rulers of the Congregation . Give not thy Son and Wife , thy Brother and Friend , power over thee while thou livest , and give not thy Goods to another , lest it repent thee , and thou intreat for the same again . As long as thou livest and hast Breath in thee , give not thy self over to any . For better it is that thy Children should seek to thee , than that thou shouldest stand to their Courtesie . In all thy works keep to thy self the Preeminence , leave not a stain in thine Honour . At the time when thou shalt end thy days and finish thy Life , distribute thy Inheritance . 4 thly . 'T is the Duty of Parents to have their Will and Testament in readiness . They ought , while they are in Health , to determine the several Proportions of their Worldly Goods , which they intend to bestow on their Children , and not to leave the doing of this till the very immediate approach of Death . A wise Man ought so to dispose of his affairs in time , that when he comes to die , he may have as little work to do as is possible . 'T is very unfit , on many accounts , to leave the ordering of those things which relate to a Man's Estate unto the last hour . For , 1. No Man knows if he shall have a leisurely Passage out of the World , so as to have time to settle his affairs ; a thousand Accidents may prevent this ; of which see [ Discourse about the right way of Improving our Time , Motive 2 d. ] 2 dly . Tho' you should have time on your Death-Bed , for ordering your Temporal Affairs , yet what signifies Time ( considered abstractly and separately ) if you are not fit to use it ? For ought you know , your Sickness then may so affect your Head , that you shall not be able to act any longer as rational Creatures , but must be governed and taken care of by others , as if you were Children upon the Breasts , or perhaps as Persons in a much more sad and lamentable condition . Now therefore , it is fit for all who are wise , to provide against such Casualties , and not to delay so important and necessary a work to an uncertain Moment . 3 dly . Supposing you have a leisurely passage out of this Life , together with the use of your Reason all the while , yet consider , that you are likely to have enough to do in your last hours , tho' the ordering of your Temporal concerns do not then lie upon your Hands . Your Spiritual Enemies will , very probably , at that time , muster up all their Forces , and use their utmost Effort , either to conquer you , or to frighten and disturb you : You will then find that all your Preparation is little enough , that you may finish your course with Joy : The sight of Death will make you see a great many things , far otherwise than you saw them in time of Health : The things of this Life will then appear very little and inconsiderable , and Eternity will appear as a vast and boundless Ocean : Your good actions will appear but very few and imperfect , and your Sins and Follies very many and great . Thus it is generally with the best and most Holy Persons ; and therefore , 't is your wisest and safest course , to dispatch , not only as much of your great Business as you can before the approach of Death , but likewise to dispose of your Worldly Concerns in such a manner , that they may not prove a hindrance and a burthen to you at that time , when you are to have a sharp Conflict with the King of Terrors . But besides all these Considerations , which ought to excite you to put your House in order , in time of your Health ; consider farther , that by so doing , you will prevent a great deal of Trouble and Confusion , and of Strife and Division , which oft-times happen amongst Children , when their several Portions are not assigned them by the Will of their Parents . How sad is it to reflect upon so many Instances of this kind , as have happened in our days ! It cannot but be look'd upon as a great Reproach to our Holy Religion , to see Brethren , and other near Relations , contending , and going to Law with one another , and thereby laying the Foundation of lasting Variance and Discord , of Bitterness and Wrath , of Anger and Clamour , of Malice and Envy , &c. which too often are concluded , with the Desolation and Destruction of one or other of the contending Parties , if not of the whole Family . How needful therefore is it for Parents to make their Will in good time ? when they are in Health , when their Understanding is good , when their Memory is perfect , when they are able to think of Business , and to judge calmly and discreetly of what they do ; when they can call to mind what they owe , and what is owing to them . And because of the great Falsehood and Wickedness of the World , by which it often happens that the true sense of Mens words are perverted , it is likewise very fit that Parents , in setting their House in Order , have the advice of those who are Skilful , Upright , and Faithful Persons , by whose Assistance their Will may be framed in such Terms and Expressions , as may ( so far as is possible ) prevent the Cavils of Crafty and Ungodly Men. As Parents ought to use a great deal of Caution and Circumspection in all things relating to their last Will , so particularly in the choice of Guardians for their Children , who , after their own Decease , may act the part of Parents towards them , and may promote their Happiness and Welfare , both in Temporal and Spiritual things . If you know amongst your near Relations those who are Wise and Prudent , True and Upright Persons , who fear and love God , and of whose sincere kindness you have had long experience , 't is very reasonable to prefer them before Strangers . * But if you have found others more sincere and upright , more prudent and discreet , more kind and loving , more constant in their Friendship , and more faithful to your true Interest , than your nearer Relations have been , you ought rather to entrust your Children to their care , than to those , who , tho' your Kinsmen , have given you no great ground to expect much kindness and faithfulness at their hands towards your Children . If they have not been very faithful to you , 't is but madness to expect that they should prove more Faithful to them . Tho' they may grow better , yet no wise Man ought to trust so great and dear a concern to such an uncertainty . Thus I have shewed you what are the principal Duties you owe to the Souls and Bodies of your Children , and what you are to do for them as to their outward Estate . The above mentioned particulars earnestly recommended to Parents . FRom what hath been said you may see , what a weighty and difficult Charge you have ; the sense whereof should excite you to beg of God earnestly every day , that he would direct and assist you , to perform the Duties that belong to Christian Parents . That you may the better act your part ; 't is fit for you , when you call your selves to an account about your Lives and Conversations , to make enquiry particularly how you perform the Duties of Parents towards your Children , as to their Souls , their Bodies , and Outward Concerns : And if , upon serious enquiry , you find that you sincerely endeavour to do whatever you know your selves to be bound to do for them ; then bless and praise God , who gives you both to will and to do according to his good Pleasure : Beg his pardon for those Imperfections and Defects that attend all Humane Actions , Resolve to go on , and not to grow weary in your Duty towards them ; that so they may be as happy in all respects , as is possible for you , by the help of God , to make them . But if upon inquiry , you find that you have been very negligent in your duty towards your Children ; that you have done very little good for their Souls , and not what you should , and might have done for their Bodies and outward Estate ; and that perhaps you have done them a great deal of hurt by your Evil Counsel , and Prophane and Wretched Example ; that you have led them on in the Broad Way , which leads to the Chambers of Death , that you have robbed God , who bestowed them on you , of their Service and Obedience ; and have made them the Servants of Sin ; that you have contributed to the making them Heirs of Wrath , and Children of Disobedience , who were made by their Baptism , Children of God , and Inheritors of the Kingdom of Heaven ; that you have done what tended to destroy eternally those Souls and Bodies , which God intrusted with you , that you might take care of them , and do what you could to make them happy . If , I say , upon enquiry into your hearts and lives , you find your selves guilty of those things , how great reason have you to be in bitterness and grief of Heart , to weep and lament , to abhor your selves in Dust and Ashes , to confess and acknowledge your Sins with great Humility and Contrition , to implore the Divine Mercy and Forgiveness with all earnestness , for the sake of his dear Son ; to resolve and purpose sincerely to amend your ways and doings ; to beg Grace from God , that he would assist you , that he would compass you about with his Salvation , and never leave you nor forsake you ; that he would give you his Holy Spirit to sanctifie you , to wash and cleanse you , to lead and guide you , to support and strengthen you , to revive and quicken you , to carry you from strength to strength , and from Grace to Grace , till you come and appear before him in Sion . Consider the particular things wherein you have hurt the Souls of your Children , and failed in your Duty to them , as to their Bodies and Outward Concerns : And the more you find you have done amiss , resolve so much the more to be zealous to do them good ; to double your diligence in promoting the welfare and happiness both of their Souls and Bodies . Tell them so far as is meet , what you now see and feel ; let them know that you have been out of the way , that you have misled them , and brought both your selves and them in danger of being undone , and ruined Eternally : Tell them what you resolve to do , and what you and they ought to do , and must do , or else that you will certainly perish . Delay not to do this one moment : fly like a Bird out of the Snare of the Fowler . Your Souls lie at the stake , and therefore do what Men use to do to save their Lives ; Skin for Skin , and all that a Man hath , will be give for his Life . Men are ready to part with any thing to save their Lives ; They 'l part with House and Lands , with Silver and Gold , with their whole Estate and Substance , to save their Bodies alive , which must die at last , and , for ought they know , may die within a very few days or hours . How much more ought you , that you may save your own Souls , and the Souls of your Children , to part with your ●ile and unruly Lusts and Passions , your vain foolish Habits and Customs , which are your reproach and dishonour , which are the worst things in the World , which can do you no good , if you hold them still , but will certainly do you a great deal of mischief ? They will prove the cause of your destruction ; they will deprive you of all that is good and excellent ; they will cut you off from the favour of God , the Love of Christ , and the fellowship of the Blessed Spirit ; they will likewise deprive you of the Assistance and Ministry of the Holy Angels , and the Comfortable Society of the Saints departed ; they will exclude you for ever from the Kingdom of Heaven , the Crown of Righteousness , the Peace , the Joy , the Love , and Glory of the future State : All this your sins will deprive you of ; and instead thereof , they will expose you to the Wrath of God , to the devouring fire , to Everlasting Burnings , to blackness of darkness , to weeping and gnashing of Teeth , to the wretched and cursed Company of Devils and damned Souls , to the Worm which never dieth , which will gnaw you , and torment you for ever : And will you chuse all this rather than part with your Lusts , that you may be for ever happy , and have fulness of Joy and Pleasures for evermore ? Will you be so mad , as to prefer Hell and Death , everlasting Misery and Woe , to Heaven and Everlasting Life , to Blessedness and Glory ? And will you still continue to be so cruel to your poor Children , as to draw them along with you to the bottomless Pit ? Now is the time for you to become either happy or miserable ; if you repent and amend , and act the part of Wise and Religious Parents , you may be happy ; for God will have Mercy upon you . Isa. 55. 7. Let the wicked forsake his way , and the unrighteous Man his Thoughts : And let him return unto the Lord , and he will have Mercy upon him , and to our God , for he will abundantly pardon . Follow therefore the Example of the Psalmist , Psal. 119. 59 , 60. I thought on my ways , and turned my feet unto thy Testimonies , I made haste and delayed not to keep thy Commandments . Resolve without delay to forsake your wicked Customs and Practices : Begin in earnest to work out your own Salvation : and do all that lies in your power to make your Children wise and good . But if , instead of this , you continue in your sin and folly , setting at naught God's Counsels , and despising his Reproofs , putting the Evil day far from you , promising your selves peace and safety , tho' you walk after your own Hearts Lusts ; making a mock at Sin , and laughing at all that is sacred and serious ; and by your wicked Example destroying the Souls and Bodies of your poor Children ; then assure your selves God will not be mocked ; he will at last whet his Sword and bend his Bow , and make ready his Arrows against his Adversaries ; he will render to you according to your Works ; he will in no wise clear the Guilty . Consider the terrible threatning which is mentioned , Deut. 29. 19 , 20. against the Man , who , when he heareth the words of the Curse , does bless himself in his Heart , saying , I shall have peace , tho' I walk in the imagination of my heart , to add drunkenness to thirst : [ The Lord will not spar● him , but the anger of the Lord and his jealousie shall smoke against that Man ; and all the Curses that are written in this Book shall lie upon him , and the Lord shall blot out his Name from under Heaven . ] Concerning the Duty of Parents when God removeth their Children by death . THe Death of Children as well as Aged Persons , falls out so very often , that it cannot but be seasonable to a great many Parents to suggest to them some plain and easie Considerations , which they may sometimes reflect upon , and imprint on their minds , that so they may not be surprised with the death of their Children , nor swallowed up of excessive and immoderate grief . Parents ought to consider , when their Children dye , first , that it is the Lord who does it : He who is Lord of Life , who gave Life to themselves and to their Children , is also Lord of death , and removes out of the World whom , and when , he sees fit , He is the great Potter ; and Man is the Clay , which he hath formed and fashioned into a curious and beautiful shape ; and animated with an immortal Soul : When he sees fit to break this brittle Vessel in pieces , and to separate the Soul from it , who can stay his Hand ? Or who dare say unto him , what dost thou ? May not he do with his own , what he thinks good ? Or must he give an account of his Actions , unto the work of his own Hands ? He is infinitely great and powerful ; and therefore will do according to his own good pleasure : He is infinitely wise , and knows what 's best and fittest to be done : He is infinitely good and kind , and therefore will order all things for good : And he is infinitely just and righteous , and therefore can do no wrong . It 's fit therefore that Parents , when God removes their Children from them by Death , submit chearfully to the will of him , who is infinitely powerful , wise , good , and just ; and that they adore him , and say with Ely , 1 Sam. 3. 18. It is the Lord , let him do what seemeth him good . And with the Royal Psalmist , Ps. 39. 9. I was dumb , I opened not my Mouth ; because thou didst it . Secondly , they should consider that their Children were born Mortal , frail by Nature , subject to a necessity of dying , by their very composition and frame ; and also by the Decree of Heaven , Heb. 9. 27. It is appointed for all Men once to dye . And therefore when God sees fit to remove them by Death , to make the House of Clay fall down about their Ears , Parents ought not to be surprised . This is nothing but what falls out daily : Some are going out of the World , and some are coming into it : Some are a great while upon the Stage , and some but a very short while ; some no sooner enter upon it , but presently they are gone , and are seen no more ; some take a few turns , and then they are withdrawn ; some tarry longer , and Act a great part on the Stage , for a considerable time , and give hopes of yet greater Actions and Performances ; but on a sudden they are gone likewise , as a shadow ; and all their own designs and projects , and the hopes and expectations of others fall to the ground . All this happens every day in the Course of things here in the World ; and therefore Parents have no reason to think it strange when they see their Children dye . The thing that hath been , it is that which shall be ; and that which is done , is that which shall be done ; and there is no new thing under the Sun , Eccles. 1. 9. And as it is with Men , so it is with all things else , which live upon the Earth , or grow out of it : Some live longer and some a shorter while than others of the same kind : Some prosper and thrive , and others decay and perish . Some things grow up in the Morning , and are withered e're Night : Some things grow apace till they are very near the time of ripeness and perfection ; and then somewhat happeneth , which prevents the perfect growth , and makes the goodly appearance come to nothing : Now , what are Men ? Moses in his Prayer ( Ps. 90. 5 , 6. ) tells us , In the Morning they are like grass , which groweth up ; In the Morning it flourisheth and groweth up : In the Evening it is cut down and withereth . And to the same purpose the Psalmist David speaketh , Psal. 103. 15 , 16. As for Man his days are as grass , as a flower of the field , so he flourisheth , for the Wind passeth over it , and it is gone , and the place thereof shall know it no more . Likewise Esa. 40. 6 , 7. it is thus written , The Voice said Cry. And he said , What shall I Cry ? All flesh is grass , and all the goodliness thereof is as the flower of the field . The grass withereth , the flower fadeth , because the Spirit of the Lord bloweth upon it : Surely the People is grass . By all which it appears what Man is by Nature , to wit , a very weak and vanishing thing , soon nipt and brought to nothing ; like the tender Grass , and the Flower of the Field , which is more exposed to the Winds and other inconveniences , than the Flowers of the Garden , which the Gardiner preserves and secures . The Consideration of these things , will tend mightily to quiet the minds of those who calmly and wisely reflect upon them , when God removes their Children , or other Relations from them by Death . Their case is not singular , it is that which is common and usual amongst Men ; it is according to the course of Nature for a mortal thing to die . Plutarch reports of Anaxagoras , an Ancient Philosopher , That when he was Discoursing to his Hearers concerning the Causes of Natural Things , One brought him the news of his Sons Death ; upon which , after a little pause , he said to those who were present , I knew I begat a Son that was Mortal . The Consideration of this did quiet the Thoughts of this Heathen . But what if the manner of the death of your Children be somewhat extraordinary , by some sudden and unusual Accident , or by some strange and odd Distemper ; are you on this account to allow your selves in the excesses of Sorrow and Mourning ? No , in no ways : You are not therefore to be transported into immoderate grief and mourning . Shall you be vexed and disquieted , because a Worm did eat up your pleasant Fruit , or because the stormy Wind did blow away your lovely Flowers ? Are you therefore to be enraged and mad with anger against the Worms , or against the Winds ? What would it mend the matter , if you should give way to your passion and anger never so much in such a case ? This would only multiply your losses , by making you lose not only your Fruit and your Flowers , but your selves too : Which they all do , who lose their Patience , in which it is that we possess our Souls . When therefore your Children are removed from you by Death , in some unusual and extraordinary manner , you ought to look beyond Diseases , or Accidents , unto the Lord of Life and Death ; who by his Providence ordereth not only their death , but the manner of it . If the Sparrows fall not to the Ground , that is , die not , without your Father : You may be sure your Children do not die by chance , or without the particular disposal of their heavenly Father . As to the particular grounds and reasons , for which God does after such a manner see fit to put an end to your Childrens days , you are not to be too curious and inquisitive . The Counsels of God are a great deep : His ways are in the deep waters ; and none by searching can find him out unto perfection , Job 11. 7. Upon such occasions all ought to remember the words of our Lord , when they told him of the Galileans , whose Blood Pilate hath mingled with their Sacrifices , Luke 13. 2 , 3 , 4 , 5. Suppose ye that these Galileans were Sinners above all the Galileans , because they suffered such things ? I tell you , Nay : But except ye repent , ye shall all likewise perish . Or those eighteen upon whom the Tower of Si●oe fell , and slew them , think ye that they were sinners above all Men that dwelt in Jerusalem ? I tell you , Nay : But except ye repe●t , ye shall all likewise perish . We see what was Aarons Carriage , when God removed his two Sons Nadab and Abihu by a very extraordinary stroke . Levit. 10. 2. There went Fire from the Lord and devour'd them , &c. And v. 3. 't is said , That Aaron 〈◊〉 his peace . He did not murmur against the Justice of God , or complain as if he had been too severe . No , he was silent ; He submitted to the Will 〈◊〉 God , and considered that the Honour of God ought to be dearer to him tha● the Lives of his two Sons . In like manner we see how Job carried himself , when God removed 〈◊〉 seven Sons and three Daughters , all at one blow , in an extraordinary manner , Job 1. 18 , 19. Thy Sons and thy Da●ghters were eating and drinking Wine 〈◊〉 their eldest Brothers House ; And 〈◊〉 there came a great Wind from the Wilderness , and smote the four Corners 〈◊〉 the House , and it fell upon the young Men , and they are dead . This was sad news to the good old Man , who had ●●rd so much ill news before . But yet for all this , you see how patiently ●e hare his Affliction . He fell down ●pon the Ground and Worshipped , and said , Naked came I out of my Mothers Womb , and naked shall I return thither : The Lord gave , and the Lord hath taken 〈◊〉 , blessed be the Name of the Lord , Job . 1. 20 , 21. This good Man was so far from Cursing God , which Satan said ●e would do , that he humbly adored and worshipped him . He was so far from Blasphemeing God , and from entertaining any dishonourable Thoughts of him , as if he had done any thing which he ought not to have done , that , 〈◊〉 the contrary , he approved of all , he acquiesced in the Divine pleasure ; he considered , that all that he once enjoyed , was a free and undeserved gift from God , which he so gave , as still to reserve to himself the Supreme Power of disposing of it , as he should think good ; and therefore , when all was taken away from him , he blessed the Name of the Lord ; he did not quarrel with the Divine Providence , but was heartily thankful , not only for the former Mercies , but also for th● present Correction and Chastisement which he knew to proceed from Infinite Wisdom , Goodness , and Justice . To the abovementioned instances from Scripture , might be added several Examples of the patience and composedness of Spirit , which some Heathens discovered , when their Children were suddenly snatched away by a violent and untimely Death . I shall only mention two , related by Plutarch . The 1 st is , of Dio of Syracuse , who , as he was busie in consulting with his Friends about matters of importance , heard a great noise and tumult in the House , which occasioned his enquiring what the matter was ; and being told that his Son was dead by a fall from the Roof of the House , he received this sad news without discovering any perturbation of Mind ; and having given Orders that the dead Body should be delivered into the hands of the Women , that they might take care of it , and that it should be buried in the accustomed manner ; He went on in his Design , to consult with his Friends about the business that was before him . The other instance , is , of Xenophon , who , when he was employed in offering Sacrifice , received the news of his Son 's being killed in Battel ; at the hearing of which he pull'd off the Garland from his Head , wherewith it was then covered , and having askt the manner of his Son's Death , and being told that he died fighting valiantly for his Country , he quickly brought his Mind , which was a little disturb'd , into subjection to his Reason , and again putting on the Garland , he went on with his Sacrifice , and told those who brought him the news of his Son's Death , I never pray'd the Gods to make my Son Immortal , or very long liv'd ( it being very uncertain if that be expedient ) but to make him an Honest Man , and a Lover of his Country : And now , said he , I have my desire . Thirdly , Consider from whence , and whither they are gone . They were here in a life of Vexation and Trouble ; subject to innumerable Vanities , Temptations , Snares , and Dangers : They were compassed about with great and terrible Enemies , the Devil , the World , and the Flesh : They were subject to daily necessities and wants . I● they had lived never so long , they would only have seen the same things in a continual succession and revolution : As for Example , heat and cold , fair weather and foul , might and day , Summer and Winter , health and sickness , plenty and poverty , peace and war , prosperity and adversity , succeeding one to another : All things going round . But now they are delivered from all these ; they are at rest , they are subject to no more necessities and wants ; oppressed with no more troubles and vexations ; exposed to no more enemies , temptations , or dangers ; but exalted to a state of perfect Peace , Joy , Love , and Glory . They are as well and better than you can desire : You are not able to comprehend the Happiness that they are admitted to . Will you then be in continual sorrow and grief for your Children , when they are exalted to a state of Rest and Glory ; when they are where you would rejoyce to be ; when their Gracious Father hath freed them from the vain company of the World , and Translated them into the blessed Society of Angels , and of the Spirits of Just Men made perfect ; when he hath put an end to their Toil and Labour , to their Fighting and Wrestling against their Enemies , and bestowed on them a Crown of Glory , and an Everlasting Inheritance ; when he hath broken their Bonds asunder , wherein they were held and kept in Captivity and Slavery , and hath put them into a state of perfect and glorious Freedom ? The consideration of these things should mitigate and asswage your Sorrow and Grief , and fill you with unspeakable Comfort and Gladness . But some are apt to say , I should rejoyce , if I thought that my Children , who are dead , were in Heaven : But this I do not know . As to this , you are not to trouble your thoughts about it ; for God does not see fit to acquaint you with such things . Secret things belong to God ; and things revealed to us and to our Children , Deut. 29. 29. If your Children , while they were alive , minded good things ; and if you did your part to instruct them , and to make them what God requires them to be , you are not to be any further solicitous about their Everlasting state : You are to hope that they are very happy , and you are to comfort your selves with these thoughts . Others are apt to say , I am afraid that my Children are not in a happy state ; they did very bad things , and used bad Company ; and therefore I have cause to fear , and to be troubled about them , now that they are dead . As to such Parents , who have had wretched Children , they ought not to suffer their minds to be disordered , and oppressed with Grief and Sorrow , because their Children , who died , were wicked . If they did their Duty to make them better ; if they advised and admonished them ; if they reproved them , and , as was fitting , chastened them ; if they desired others to deal with them , to see what they could do towards the reclaiming of them ; if they prayed to God for them , and gave them a good Example : They are not any further to be troubled and disquieted concerning them , when God takes them into his own hand ; He is wise and good , holy and just , he does all things well , for excellent and glorious ends ; and therefore Parents ought to leave them to his Disposal , who is the Supreme Governour of the World , and Judge of the whole Earth . Whatever he does , whether in Mercy or Justice , is always best . The Inhabitants of the other World , who are translated into a state of Heavenly Glory , are not under the power of such passions and partialities , as govern us here below . The glorified Parents of damned Children , are not under any uneasiness on that or any other account : The Will of God and his Glory is their all ; they know that whatever he does is most perfectly just and good , and for his Honour ; and therefore all things afford them great Pleasure and Delight , true and lasting Joy and Satisfaction of mind . There 's nothing able to interrupt the happiness and joy of those in Glory : They are perfectly and eternally delivered from all sort of evils , both of sin and punishment : They are placed above the reach of whatever may render them in the least uneasie . But there is a third sort ; of those who are troubled , not only because their Children were bad and prophane , but because they were so through their example or neglect . As for such , I have already in general shewed them what they ought to do . I shall only add ; That since they have been so faulty and defective in their Duty towards their Deceased Children , they ought to be the more careful of those who are yet alive , and to do all that is possible to make them what God requires them to be . As to those who have no more Children left them , it would be very fit for them to take into their care one or more Children , upon whom they may bestow all that pains and care which they should have bestowed in the right Education of their own ; and endeavour , by God's help , to make them truly Pious and Religious , and Patterns of all sorts of Virtue to others . This is an Office which will be very acceptable to God , and one of the best demonstrations which Parents can make of the sincerity of their Repentance , for their not having done their Duty to their own Children . Fourthly , Consider , that there will be a Resurrection of all those that are dead . The mighty Power of God , which made all things out of nothing , will also gather together the scattered dust of those who are deceased , and will reform and rebuild , as it were , their bodies which are fallen down , and consumed . He will raise them up again in a more excellent , perfect , and glorious manner . Then shall you meet with your Children and Friends who died in the Lord , and behold them after another manner ▪ than you saw them here in this World. Instead of weak and diseased bodies , you shall see them strong , vigorous , and lively bodies : Instead of frail and dying bodies , you shall see immortal and incorruptible bodies : Instead of filthy and vile bodies , you shall see pure and glorious bodies : And you shall see them so as to be with them for ever , so as never any more to be separated from them by death , or any other thing ; for you and they shall die no more : 1 Cor. 15. 42 , 43 , 44. So also is the resurrection of the dead . It is sown in corruption , it is raised in incorruption ; it is sown in dishonour , it is raised in glory . It is sown in weakness , it is raised in power . It is sown a natural body , it is raised a spiritual body : And , vers . 53. This corruptible must put on incorruption , and this mortal must put on immortality . How gladly would poor People part with their dearest Children , if they could be assured of seeing them again in an honourable state and condition , exalted to great Dignity and Honour ? And will not you , who have the hopes of a glorious Resurrection , be comforted in the absence of your Children ? When their merciful God and Father takes them away from you unto himself ; not to do them hurt , but good ; to make them happy and blessed with himself for ever ; to bestow upon them what Eye hath not seen , nor Ear heard , nor which hath entred into the Heart of Man to conceive ? Consider the words of the Apostle to the Thessalonians , 1 Epist. 4. 13 , 14. But I would not have you to be ignorant , Brethren , concerning them which are asleep , that ye sorrow not , even as others which have no hope : For if we believe that Jesus dyed and rose again , even so them , which sleep in Jesus , will God bring with him . Fifthly , Your giving way to excessive Grief and Mourning , can do you no good , but will certainly do you a great deal of hurt and mischief in many respects . It cannot bring back your Children that are dead . Though you should break your Hearts into a thousand pieces , by your weeping and mourning , and waste and consume your years in constant heaviness and sorrow ; tho' you should never henceforth allow your selves one moment of relaxation of mind ; after all , you must go to them , they shall not return to you . Now what a folly is it for Men to consume , to disquiet , and to torment themselves , where it is to no purpose at all to do so ? And not only do you thereby no good at all to your selves , but you do your selves a great deal of mischief and prejudice . You provoke God to anger against you , to bring upon you yet heavier and more grievous punishments , and to deprive you of other Mercies and Comforts , which you still enjoy . You do thereby no small hurt to your Bodies ; you bring upon your selves very dangerous distempers , which will make you unfit for the actions of Life , and the Duties of your Calling . You likewise do unspeakable mischief to your Souls ; you deprive your selves of that vigour and chearfulness of Spirit , that is needful to make you fit to serve God acceptably . You thereby weaken your Memory , and darken and disorder your Reason and Understanding , and so expose your selves to all the sad consequences of a disordered and distracted Mind . Your Example does also a great deal of hurt to others : Your impatience and immoderate sorrow and mourning teacheth others to do so upon the like occasion . Hereby you bring no small reproach upon our holy Religion , as if it were not sufficient to support and fortifie us against our crosses and afflictions , and to comfort us amidst the uneasie things which God sees fit to exercise us with in this World. What an excellent Example is David unto you in this matter ? When God struck his Child , so that it was very sick , he fasted and prayed ; but when the Child died , he arose from the earth , and washed and anointed himself , and changed his apparel , and c●me unto the House of the Lord , and worshipped : Then he came to his own House ; and when he required , they 〈◊〉 Bread before him , and he did eat . Then said his Servants unto him , What thing is this that thou hast done ? Thou didst fast and weep for the Child , while it was alive ; but when the Child was dead , thou didst rise and eat Bread. And he said , While the Child was yet alive , I fasted and wept ; for I said , Who can tell , whether God will be gracious unto me , that the Child may live ? But now he is dead , Wherefore should I fast ? Can I bring him again ? I shall go to him , but he shall not return to me , 2 Sam. 12. 15 , 16 , &c. Thus ought all Parents to do , who fear God. When the Lord layeth his hand upon your Children , you ought to pray to God for them , and to use all lawful means for their recovery : But when he ●ees fit to take them away by death , you ought patiently to submit to his Will ; This is your wisest course ; It is the way to make your selves happy , and to enjoy comfort and satisfaction of mind under your crosses . This is the likeliest and readiest way to obtain new Mercies and Favours from the Lord , instead of those you are deprived of : Thus you see the Lord dealt with Job : Jam. 5. 11. Ye have heard of the patience of Job , and have seen the end of the Lord : That the Lord is very pitiful , and of tender mercy . And , Job 42. 12 , 13. The Lord blessed the latter end of Job , more than his beginning . And , vers . 16 , 17. After this lived Job an hundred and forty years , and saw his Sons , and his Sons Sons , even four Generations . So Job dyed , being old and full of days . But if God see it more fit to withhold from you the blessings of the Womb , and to bestow no more Children upon you ; he can and will make up this want , with much greater and better Blessings . What you want in Temporals , you shall have in Spirituals . As Elkanah said to Hannah , 1 Sam. 1. 8. He will be better to you than ten Sons . He will give you a Name better than of Sons and Daughters , even an everlasting Name , that shall not be cut off . Isa. 56. 5. The Duty of Parents On their Death-Bed . The shortness and great uncertainty of your Time , ought to make you very careful , while you are in Health , to improve , as well as you can , the present opportunities of doing good to your Children , both as to their Spiritual and Temporal concerns . There can be no greater Folly , than to delay the doing whatever is needful for your Childrens real Happiness and welfare , meerly out of a vain Expectation of having time enough to do every thing of this kind , when you lie upon your Death-Bed . 'T is strange , that Men who daily see the Casualties which others do meet with , and who have power to consider the great Dangers their own Lives have been exposed to , should notwithstanding flatter themselves with such Thoughts , and be so far bewitched thereby , as to neglect any Duty of Importance and Necessity , which now they have sufficient opportunity to do . And therefore , while you are in Health , fail not to do all the good you can to your Children both for their Souls and Bodies , and for their outward Estate . But , if it shall please God to afford you time and leisure , upon your Death-Bed , to do any thing for their Benefit , neglect not at such a time to do whatever your Weakness and Sickness will permit . Particularly , 1 st , Give them your best Advice : Direct them according to their Capacities : Consider what their faults and defects most commonly have been , and suggest to them such things as God shall bring into your mind , to make them sensible of their faults , and to rescue them from their evil Habits . Consider what those things are , whereby they are most likely to be endangered , and strive to fortifie their Minds with such wholesom Precepts and Maxims , as may tend to preserve them for the time to come . Consider what good thing does appear in any of them , and endeavour to stablish their Minds in Virtue and Goodness , in the Fear and Love of God. Amongst other things , 't is 〈◊〉 to recommend to them Unity and Concord , that they Love one another heartily , and be ready to assist and serve one another to the utmost of their power , that they be friendly Monitors to One another , and take it kindly and thankfully when they are so deale with . Then likewise you may advise them , to endeavour , as much as is possible , to live peaceably with all Men ; to be careful , not to wrong any body by Word or Deed , but on the contrary to seek the welfare of others , to strive to do all the good they can in the World , and to make it as their necessary Food to glorifie God. David's Example is worthy of the imitation of all Religious Parents at such a time , of whom 't is said , 1 King. 2. 1 , 2 , 3 , 4. He charged Solomon his Son , saying , I go the way of all the Earth : Be thou strong therefore and shew thy self a Man. And keep the Charge of the Lord thy God , to walk in his ways , to keep his Statutes and his Commandments , and his Judgments , and his Testimonies , as it is written in the Law of Moses , that thou mayest prosper in all that thou doest , and whithersoever thou turnest thy self : That the Lord may confirm his Word , which he spake concerning me , &c. 2 dly . Pray to God to bless them , to sanctifie them , and to preserve them ; that he would never leave them nor forsake them , that he would be their God and Guide , and their Portion for ever , that he would possess them with his fear , and keep them in his love , and preserve them from sin , and from all their Spiritual Enemies , and that he would order all things for their good . The fervent Prayer of a Righteous Man availeth much at all times , but never more than when he is stepping into Eternity , and going to his Heavenly Father . Parents therefore , at this time , ought to be Importunate with God , especially for Spiritual Blessings to their Children , that he would grant them his Grace , to walk in his ways , and to keep his Commandments , and that his kind Providence may be their Inheritance . 3 dly . It will be very fit at such a time , to commend them to some of your Friends , whom you have found true and faithful , sincere and upright , and kind and loving to you and yours . This is especially needful to be done for those Children , who are less able to look to themselves . 'T will be of unspeakable Advantage to them , in many respects , to be directed and assisted by those who are their true Friends , who by their counsel and advice , and by doing other good Offices for them , will be as Eyes , and Hands , and Feet unto them , and will prove a defence unto them against a great deal of danger and mischief , till such time as they are capable to mind their own Business , and are fixt and settled in the World. HAving discoursed of the Duties of Natural Parents , 't will not be amiss to say somewhat concerning the Duty of those who are in the place of Parents , such as Step-Fathers and Step-Mothers ( or Fathers and Mothers in Law ) and Guardians . And first , Concerning the Duties of Step-Fathers and Step-Mothers . The first and chief thing which belongs to the care of Step-Parents , is , to do all that they can for the benefit of their Childrens Souls . They ought to endeavour to season their tender minds with the Fear and Love of God , to reform what is amiss in their temper and humour by all kind and prudent Methods , to teach them to worship God , to Remember their Creator in the days of their Youth : They ought to see that they be taught to read ; that they spend the Lord's Day well , and that they frequent the place of Publick Worship : They ought to make them understand what was promised in their Name at their Baptism , and to encourage them to renew their Baptismal Covenant , if they have an opportunity : They ought to advise them to come to the Lord's Table so soon as they are fit for it , and then , as also at other times , to examine themselves , and to call themselves to a strict and serious account , They ought to observe what remarkable Mercies and Providences they meet with , and to acquaint them therewith so soon as they are capable to reflect on such things : They ought likewise , to talk to them often of the various Providences which either they have met with themselves , or which they have observed in the World , that thereby the Childrens minds may be affected with a due sense of the Power , the Greatness , the Wisdom , the Mercy , and the Justice of God. To render all which endeavours effectual , they must be Examples of Piety to them : They must see what Company they use , and do what they can to keep them out of ill Company , and to acquaint them with those who have a sense of good things : They must reprove them when it is needful , but with great mildness and discretion : And as for correcting and chastening of them , they ought to leave that part to the Natural Parent , if alive ; but if the Natural Parent be dead , then they may correct them when it is necessary , according to their Age : But in this great caution ought to be used , they must do it with the greatest gentleness and tenderness that is possible , not only out of Conscience , but Prudence , to prevent all occasion , which a great many are apt to take , to reflect upon them , and to censure them severely and unjustly , when they do any thing that looks like unkindness or sharpness to their Step-Children . 'T is therefore very adviseable , when Correction is necessary , to acquaint some of the Childrens Relations ( if they be not at too great a distance ) with their fault , and so to correct them by their advice , and , if possible , in their presence , that they may be , as it were , Witnesses of their doing nothing but what is absolutely fit and needful to be done for the advantage of the Children . Step-Parents ought also to take the opportunity of their Childrens sickness , or of any other Adversity they meet with , to set home upon their minds such Admonitions and Counsels as they were not so apt to mind when they were in health . And to all their other Endeavours , they ought to joyn their daily prayers to God for them , that he would bless them , and make them his faithful and obedient Children and Servants . As Step-Parents ought principally to take care of the Souls of their Step-Children , so they must not neglect their Bodies . Their Duty as to this , is , in a word , to take care that they have necessary and convenient Food and Rayment . As to the outward Estate of Step-Children , tho' Parents are not obliged to give them any great Portion of their Worldly Goods , especially if they have , or are like to have Children of their own , to give such things to ; yet they ought to be careful , that the Portions , which of right belong to their Step-Children , be preserved and improved for their use and advantage , according to the Will of the Deceased Parent . When they are fit for a Trade or any honest way of getting their Livelyhood , they ought to assist them all they can , that they may be placed forth as happily and comfortably as may be . In like manner when they are fit for Marriage , they ought to express a great deal of readiness and chearfulness to serve them to the utmost of their Power ; they ought to assist them with their best advice and hearty Counsel in a matter of so great Importance . And , in a word , they ought not to be wanting to them in any thing that may be useful and beneficial to them , either as to their Souls , or Bodies , or as to their outward Concerns . Some Motives to stir up Step-Parents to do these things . It cannot but excite Step-Parents , to perform the above-mentioned Duties for the Benefit of their Children , both in their Spiritual and Temporal concerns , if they seriously consider , 1 st , The Nature of their Marriage Relation , whereby they become one Flesh with those to whom they are married . When God made the Woman , and brought her to the Man , Gen. 2. 24. he said , Therefore shall a Man leave his Father and Mother , and cleave unto his Wife , and they shall be one Flesh. Now , by Virtue of this near Relation and close Union , they ought to have a tender regard for the Interests and Concerns of one another ; and the dearer any thing is to the one , the greater affection ought the other to have towards it . As therefore 't is past all doubt , that Children are the dearest and most valued and beloved Earthly thing that Natural Parents have , upon this account , it is very reasonable , that Step-Parents should express a great Regard and Affection for them . 2. This is the way to preserve and to increase that mutual Love , which ought to be 'twixt Man and Wife . If a Step-Parent is kind and loving to the Children , and careful to promote their Happiness and Welfare , it cannot but have an Influence on the Natural Parent , so as to produce an Increase of Love and Respect , which will render the lives of the married Persons very easie and comfortable . Whereas , on the other hand , if Step-Parents are rough , unkind , and unnatural to their Step-Children , it must needs cause a great deal of mischief ; it will certainly cool , if not quite alienate the affection of the Natural Parent , and when once this happens , there is thenceforth nothing but strife and contention , jealousies and suspicions , which are ordinarily attended with very sad and dreadful effects , to the utter Ruin of one or t'other Party , if not of both . 3. This is the way to make the Children very respectful and kind , and very dutiful and obedient to them , when they use them kindly , are careful to seek their happiness and welfare , and carry themselves towards them in all respects , as they ought to do . Whereas , on the contrary , by being unkind to them , and unconcerned for their happiness and welfare , they provoke them to hate them , and to prove Disrespectful and Disobedient to them . 4. This is the way to gain a great deal of Love and Respect from all those who are Related to the Deceased Parents , who cannot chuse but resent it very kindly , when they see the Children of their Friends well used , and taken care of both as to their Souls and Bodies : This will make them ready upon all occasions to serve them , and to do them the best Offices which are in their power : Whereas , on the other hand , if they see the poor Children of their Deceased Friends neglected and contemned , wrong'd and abus'd by unkind Step-Parents , they must needs take it in very ill part , and resent it heavily ; yea , and all other Persons , who see or hear of such unkindness , severity , and injustice , towards poor Children , cannot chuse but think very ill of those , who discover themselves to be altogether void , not only of Religion , but of Humanity also . From what hath been said , it appears how very just and reasonable it is , for Step-Parents to be heartily concerned both for the Spiritual and Temporal welfare and happiness of their Children . And therefore , how much are they to be Condemned , who make no Conscience at all of doing any thing for the benefit of either their Souls or Bodies ? As to their Souls , some Step-Parents are so far from endeavouring to season them with good Impressions , and to fortifie them against Tentations , that they themselves are their greatest Tentation , and do them the greatest hurt and prejudice . As to their Bodies , they grudge them necessary Food and Rayment , and seldom let them have any thing with good will. And as to their Outward Estate , they are so far from improving for their Advantage , the Portion of Worldly Goods that belongeth to them , that , on the contrary , they use their utmost Policy to rob them , and to disinherit them , that they may build their own Childrens Fortune upon the others Ruin ; for which end , they make it their business to alienate the Affection of their Natural Parent ; they invent a great many wicked and malicious Stories , which , with great boldness and impudence , they fasten upon them ; and they never give over working and undermining , till they have brought about their cruel and cursed Devices . But surely he that sits in Heaven , and beholds all their contrivances , even he who is the God of Recompences , will in due time bring to Light their hidden Works of Darkness , and will vindicate the cause of those poor Children , and render to their cruel Persecutors according to their Works ; he will fooner or later cause them to feel the heavy Load of his Just and Terrible Indignation . The Duties of Guardians . GUardians are either chosen by Parents before their Death , or by Children themselves after their Parents Decease , or by the Magistrate . Which way soever they are chosen , their Duty is , to do what they can for the benefit and advantage of their Pupils , both in Spiritual and Temporal Things . As to their Souls , they must take care of their good Education , according to their Age and Capacity . If they are not as yet taught to read , they ought to make choice of a skilful and prudent Schoolmaster or Tutor for them , of whose fitness for such a Charge they are well assured . But they must not so intrust them to the Care of such Persons , as never to mind them more themselves : They ought to enquire after them now and then , and either by themselves or others more fit for it , make tryal of their proficiency , that so they may be able to judge and resolve what is further to be done for them . As for the way of training them up in true Piety , the Directions given to Parents are to be observed and practised . As to their Bodies , the former Directions likewise to Parents , concerning Childrens Diet and Apparel , ought to be followed . As to their outward Estate , when they are fit for a Trade , or some sort of business , they ought to take care to settle them in good Company , so far as is possible , and in such a way of living as is most agreeable to their Genius and Inclination , and which their Friends and Relations reckon most sutable and convenient for them . It will afford great peace and satisfaction to Guardians , whatever be the Event , if in this matter they have a due regard to Childrens own Inclination , and to the Opinion of their Friends and Relations . As to their Marriage , when it is time to dispose of them that way , they onght to do nothing by force and violence : They must not constrain them to Marry , unless they have a mind themselves : And tho' they are not bound absolutely to approve of those whom their Pupils fancy , without any regard to their fitness , yet they are obliged by the Law of Justice and Equity , not to impose upon them such Matches as they cannot like . As to their Patrimony and Inheritance , they ought to improve it , as much as may be , for the Childrens good , and to employ it wholly for their use , except so far as the Law does allow them their necessary Charges , in which they ought to govern themselves , by that Golden-Rule , Mat. 7. 12. All things whatsoever ye would that Men should do to you , do ye even so to them . Some Motives to excite Guardians to do these Things . The first thing , which should stir up Guardians to perform their Duty towards their Pupils , is , A Sense of Justice . When they are chosen for this End , if they have no mind to undertake such a Charge , or if they cannot attend it , they ought to declare so much , and peremptorily to refuse it , that so care may be taken to get some other Body who will undertake it . But when once they have undertaken it , they ought to make Conscience of it , and to do all that is in their power for the Childrens welfare and happiness in every thing . 'T is both their Duty and Interest to fulfill their Ingagement , and to act that part which they have undertaken ; which if they perform wisely and faithfully , then they may expect the Praise , Love , and Esteem , of not only the Children themselves , and of their Relations , but likewise of all good and worthy Persons , who see or hear of their Fidelity and Carefulness for the benefit of their Pupils . If Care is not taken in this manner , to fulfill what is undertaken to be done , and if there is no respect had to Covenants , Trusts and Ingagements , then the very Foundation of the Happiness of Society is subverted . If there is no regard to Truth and Justice , what a miserable thing must it be to live in Society ? To be united by any civil ●yes to those , whose Promises and Ingagements are worse than none at all ? 2. Does not A Sense of Honour oblige Guardians to be careful of their Pupils , and true and faithful to them ? 'T was the Opinion of their kindness and faithfulness , and of their fitness and worthiness for such a Charge , which made them be chosen before others . And therefore , if they have any thing in them of true worth , if they have any sense of Honour , they must needs strive to answer the Expectation of those who have testified so great a value and esteem for them . 3 dly , Does not Charity oblige Guardians to do these things ? Orphans have always been reckoned amongst the greatest Objects of Charity , especially when they are very Young , and are not able , either in respect of Body or Mind , to do any thing for themselves . So great is God's Compassion and Tenderness towards such Children , that he has been Graciously pleased to declare himself to be , The Father of the Fatherless . 'T is therefore the Duty of All , who are Followers of God as dear Children , especially of those who are chosen to perform so Charitable an Office as this , I say it is their Duty , to omit nothing that is needful to be done , for the benefit of Fatherless Children , both in their Spiritual and Temporal concerns . We see a very worthy President and Example in Mordecai , Esth. 2. Esther's Father and Mother being dead , Mordecai took her , and she was to him as his own Daughter . How careful was he both of her Soul and Body ? How well did he instruct her ? As may be easily gathered from her Wise and Pious Carriage and Behaviour . And when she was taken from him , we find he was still mindful of her , for , v. 11. 't is said , Mordecai walked every day before the Court of the Womens House , to know how Esther did , and what should become of her . We find him likewise , from time to time , giving her his best Advice , how to carry her self , and how to glorifie God , in that Honourable State , to which it had pleased him to raise her . How worthy is such an excellent Pattern as this , of the imitation of all those who are called to be the Guardians , the Guides , and Defenders of Fatherless Children ? And for their encouragement , let them consider how richly God did reward the Charity and Piety of Mordecai , not only in raising him up to great Honour by Esthers means , but also by making her the Instrument of preserving his Life , and the Lives of all the Jews , who were in the Provinces belonging to Ahasuerus . From what hath been said , it appears how great Reason there is , for Guardians to be true and faithful to the Interests of their Pupils , and to do all that ever they can for their Spiritual and Temporal Advantage . Now , if it be their Duty to do so , what shall be said of those , who are not only careless of seeking their good , but do likewise , too successfully , seek their hurt and ruine ? As to their Souls , they corrupt and poyson them by their wicked Example , and by Atheistical Principles which they instill into them ; they breed them up in all manner of Licentiousness . As to their Bodies , they either too far gratifie their vanity and folly ; or they are too niggardly towards them , in withholding from them not only Conveniencies but Necessaries . As to their outward Estate , they either suffer them ▪ to live idly ; or they put them forth to some Trade or other , very unfit and unsutable to them . And when they are fit for Marriage , they force them to Marry as they think good , according as they see it will best serve their own private and worldly , base , and vile Interests , without ever regarding the Happiness of their Pupils . As for their Patrimony and Inheritance , they are so far from improving it , that they impair it wofully , and sometimes quite consume and waste it ; they study a great many Arts and Wiles to ruine the poor Children , whom they have got into their merciless hands ; Instead of proving their Guardians , they prove their Robbers ; instead of being as Parents to them , they prove betrayers of them , and their most Dangerous and Cruel Enemies . But shall they escape who do such things ? No : They shall not . He who is the helper of the Fatherless , will plead their Cause , and will avenge them of those Treacherous and Perfidious Persons : For , He beholdeth mischief to requite it , Ps. 10. 14. I shall conclude this Advice with what is written , Ex. 22. 22. &c. Ye shall not afflict any fatherless Child . If thou afflict them in any wise , and they cry at all unto me , I will surely hear their cry . And my wrath shall wax hot , and I will kill you with the Sword : And your Wives shall be Widows , and your Children Fatherless . And , Prov. 23. 10 , 11. Enter not into the fields of the Fatherless ; for their Redeemer is mighty ; He shall plead their Cause with thee . PRAYERS FOR FAMILIES . A Morning Prayer for Parents , or Masters of Families , with their Family . O Most Gracious and Merciful Lord God , who affords us , thy unworthy Servants , the Honour and Liberty of drawing near unto thee , Assist us by thy good Spirit to Worship thee with sincere Devotion , to lift up Holy Hands without wrath and doubting . We acknowledge , O Lord , we deserve not to appear in thy sight , for we are not only Vile and Sinful by Nature , being the corrupt Posterity of Sinful Parents ; but likewise we are Guilty of a great many actual Transgressions , in our Thoughts , Words , and Deeds , whereby we have provoked thee to Wrath against us . We have not only sinned through Ignorance , but have sinned also against Knowledge ; we have acted contrary to that light , which thou hast made to shine upon us . We have been very Inconstant in good Purposes and Resolutions : We have often confessed our Sins , and yet soon after returned to them . O Lord have Mercy upon us , and forgive us all our Sins , for Jesus Christ's sake . Thou who knowest the Deceitfulness and desperate Wickedness of our Hearts , make us what thou requirest us to be ; put thy Spirit within us , and cause us to walk in thy Statutes , and to keep thy Judgments , and do them . Give us unfeigned Repentance for all our past Offences : Work in us strong Resolutions to observe thy Laws for the time to come : Make us Watchful and Circumspect in all our Words and Actions ; Lord watch thou over us for good , and never leave us nor forsake us . Make us sensible of thy Power and Faithfulness , that we may put our Trust and Confidence in thee : Acquaint us more and more with our own Hearts and Lives , that the sense of our Weakness and Folly , of our manifold and great Sins , may make us very humble , and careful to avoid those Temptations which do so often and easily prevail over us . Fortifie us with great Measures of Meekness and Patience , That we may bear and endure all those uneasie things , which thou seest fit to exercise us with : Possess us with a lively sense of thy wise and just Providence , that in all things which befall us , we may say , Good is the Word of the Lord. Save us from the Immoderate Love of all Earthly things , from all vain Hopes and groundless Fears . Make us content and thankful in every condition of Life ; Faithful and Just in all our Dealings ; careful to do to others what we would have them do to us : And as much as in us lieth , to live peaceably with all Men. Set a Watch before our Lips , that we offend not with our Tongues ; save us from Lying and Slandering , from Foolish Talking and Sinful Jesting , and from all manner of Corrupt Communication : And grant that our words , being seasoned with Salt , may Minister Grace to the Hearers . Keep us mindful of thy all-seeing Eye , that we may be in thy Fear all the day long , that whether we eat or drink , or whatever else we do , we may do all to thy Glory . Lord be Merciful to the many Nations which sit in Darkness , send the Light of the Gospel unto them . Grant that all they upon whom this Glorious Light does shine , may walk as Children of the Light and of the Day , that they may put off the Works of Darkness , and put on the Armour of Light. Bless all Rulers and Governours , make them wise and good , just and merciful : Let it be their chiefest care to encourage Piety , and to restrain whatever is dishonourable to thee , the King of Kings and Lord of Lords . Have mercy on these sinful Lands : Bless and preserve our King and Queen , and all the Royal Family . Direct our Judges and Magistrates : Sanctifie and assist all thy Ministers . Be gracious to all our Friends every where ; and forgive those who wrong us by word or deed . Let thy Blessing be on this Family . Bless our Children ; make them thy Children ; put thy Fear within them ; Grant that as they grow in Years they may grow in Grace ; shed abroad thy Love in their Hearts , that they may never depart from thee ; save them from every evil thing . Be favourable , O Lord , to all others , for whom we are bound to pray on any account whatsoever ; Bless them and us in our Souls and Bodies , and in all our Affairs and Concerns . We give thee our Hearty Thanks for preserving us , and watching over us and our Habitation the last night , for affording us quiet Repose , and for raising us up in Health and Safety this Morning : Be with us this Day : Assist and direct us in all our ways : Give thy Angels charge concerning us . Lord make us ready to leave this vain World. Let the sense of our Frailty stir us up to redeem our time , and to give all dilligence to make our Calling and Election sure . Grant that this day we may do somewhat worthy of Christians , for thy Glory , the Advantage of others , and our own Everlasting Happiness and Comfort . Let it be our constant Study and Endeavour to follow the Example of our Blessed Saviour , who went about doing good : In whose most Blessed Name and Words we conclude our Prayers . Our Father , &c. An Evening Prayer for Parents , or Masters of Families , with their Family . O Lord our God , what shall we render unto thee for the many and great Favours , which thou hast been pleased , from Time to Time , to bestow upon us . We bless thee for giving us a Being ; for making us reasonable Creatures , capable to know and love thee , and to live for ever with thee ; for preserving us in the World ; and for affording us all things needful for our Support and Comfort . But above all we bless thee , for thy Love in Christ Jesus , whom thou hast sent into the World to visit us , to make his abode among us , to dye for us , That he might wash us from our Sins in his Blood. Lord what is Man that thou art mindful of him , or the Son of Man that thou doest , in this gracious manner , visit him ! Tho' thou hast bestowed innumerable Mercies upon us , and hast visited us with this great Salvation , yet we have been very unthankful and undutiful to thee : We have abused thy Goodness , and turned thy Grace into wantonness : We have set at naught thy Counsels and , despised thy Reproofs ; we have trampled under foot the Blood of our Saviour ; we have quenched the motions of thy good Spirit ; we have refused to obey thy Commands , and to follow thy kind and gracious Invitations ; we have not regarded thy Promises , nor been afraid of thy Threatnings ; we have been too often led by the sinful Examples and Manners of the World ; we have , in many Things , gratified our Lusts and Rassions , We have drawn near to thee with our Mouth , and Honoured thee with our Lips , when our Hearts have been far from thee ; we have promised our selves Peace and Safety , in the broad way that leads to Destruction . O Lord , We have destroyed our selves ; but in thee is our Help ; Our only Hopes are in thy infinite Mercy , who hast hitherto spared us , notwithstanding our manifold and crying Provocations . Most Gracious God , have Mercy upon us : For Jesus Christ's sake pardon us all our sinful Thoughts , Words , and Deeds ▪ Renew and Sanctifie us by thy Holy Spirit , that henceforth we may live thy faithful Servants , and may be always ready to do , or to endure whatever is thy Holy Will and Pleasure . Thou knowest our Weakness and Inconstancy ; let thy Grace continually prevent and follow us , that we may abhor that which is Evil , and cleave to that which is Good : Make us Faithful unto Death , that at last we may obtain the Crown of Life . Lord be Gracious to all Mankind ; pity those who are in a State of Ignorance and Barbarity , and send the glad tidings of Salvation to them . Grant that they who have this Blessed Light of the Gospel , may walk honestly as in the Day , that others seeing their good Works may glorifie thee our Heavenly Father . Lord cleanse thy Church from the many and great Sins which abound in her : Let every one that nameth the Name of Christ depart from Iniquity . Have Mercy on these Sinful Lands : Give Repentance to all sorts of Persons amongst us , that all of us may search and try our ways , and turn again to thee . Lord turn us that we may be turned ; and draw us , that we may run after thee , and follow thee fully . Be Gracious to our King and Queen ; direct and prosper them in all their good Designs ; make them the happy Instruments of promoting Religion amongst us . Bless the rest of the Royal Family . Guide ou● Judges and Magistrates ; Grant that they may Execute Justice without Respect of Persons . Sanctifie and assist all thy Ministers ; make them Diligent and Faithful ; grant that their Endeavours for the good of Souls , may be attended with great Success . Raise up many Faithful Pastors to feed thy Flock with Wisdom and Vnderstanding . Shew thy Pity upon all who are any ways afflicted or distressed in Mind , Body , or Estate ; Sanctifie their Afflictions unto them , give them Patience under them , and a Happy Issue out of them . Let thy Blessing be upon this Family ; let no harm come near our Dwelling this Night , or at any time . Lord bless our Children , take them into thy Gracious Protection ; give them a Heart to Fear and Love thee ; cause them to Remember thee their Creator in the days of their Youth ; possess them with a deep sense of thy Infinite Power , Wisdom , Faithfulness , and Love ; that they may walk before thee in Holiness and Righteousness all their Days : Be thou their God and Guide , and Portion for ever . Bless all others , for whom we are obliged to pray to thee ; bless them and us in our Souls and Bodies , and in all our Interests and Concerns . Blessed be thy Name for bringing us safely through the past Day , for preserving us from a great many Dangers , and for bestowing upon us innumerable Mercies : Preserve in us an Affectionate and Grateful Remembrance of all thy undeserved kindness to us . Lord watch over us this Night ; refresh us with comfortable Rest and Sleep ; defend us from all the Powers of Darkness ; save us from all vain and sinful thoughts , from all sad accidents , and from every evil thing . When thou seest fit to remove us out of this vain World , translate us into that Blessed and Happy State , which thou hast prepared for thy Ransomed Ones . And if thou art pleased to prolong our time , grant that we may spend it to good purpose , in such Designs , Words , and Actions , as may tend to thy Honour and Glory , through Jesus Christ our Lord. In whose Blessed Name and Words , we continue to pray as he hath taught us , saying , Our Father , &c. A short Prayer for the Morning or Evening , when through Extraordinary Occasions there is not time for the other . O Lord our God , look down with an Eye of Pity upon us thy unworthy Servants this * Morning . Pardon us the many Sins whereof we are Guilty before thee , in our Thoughts , Words , and Deeds . Have Mercy upon us , and be reconciled to us , through Jesus Christ thy dear Son. Sanctifie and assist us by thy Holy Spirit , that for the time to come we may do thy Will , and seek thy Glory . We bless thy Name for all thy Mercies , especially for thy wonderful Love in Christ Jesus , whom thou hast sent into the World to die for us , to purchase for us an Everlasting Kingdom . Give us Grace firmly to believe in him , heartily to love him , and constantly to obey him . Grant that it may be our sincere Endeavour to follow his Blessed Example , in all Lowliness and Self-Denyal , in Meekness and Patience , in Charity and Compassion , in Sincerity and Vprightness , in Temperance and Soberness , in Thankfulness and Contentedness , in Purity and Holiness , in Watchfulness and Circumspectness , and in fervent and prudent Zeal for thy Honour and Glory . O Lord , we bless thee , for bringing us safely through the last Night * ; Watch over us this Day † ; Keep us mindful of thy All-seeing Eye , that we may avoid every thing that is displeasing to thee . Be Gracious to all Mankind : Have Mercy on these Lands : Bless and Guide our Rulers , and all thy Ministers . Be near to all who are in trouble , and Sanctifie their Afflictions to them . Be with our Friends and Relations every where : Bless them and us with all things needful for our Souls and Bodies . Make us sensible of our Frailty and Mortality ; give us Grace so to number our Days , that we may apply our Hearts to Wisdom . When this vain and short Life is at an end , make us Partakers of Everlasting Life and Happiness , through Jesus Christ our Lord , who hath taught us when we pray to say , Our Father , &c. SOME FORMS OF PRAYER WHICH Parents may teach their Children according to their Age. A Morning Prayer to be taught Children , when they begin to speak . O Lord , I praise thee for all thy Mercies , and for thy Care of me this Night . Watch over me this Day . Forgive me all my sins , and make me thy Child for Jesus Christ's sake . This Prayer may be used likewise at Night , only changing that Petition [ watch over me this Day ] into [ watch over me this Night . ] When Children come to be four or five years old , the following Prayer may be used . O Lord my God , what shall I render unto thee for all thy Mercies ! I bless thee for giving me Life , and all things needful to keep me alive . But above all , I bless thee for sending Christ to dye for me , that he might wash me with his Blood , and make me fit for the Kingdom of Heaven . For his sake have mercy upon me , and forgive me all my sinful thoughts , words , and deeds . Give me Grace to serve thee as I ought to do ; that I may not do , nor say a naughty thing , lest thou be angry with me , and cast me into Hell fire . Lord bless and preserve my Father and Mother * and all my Friends and Relations . I praise thee , O God , for preserving me this Night , watch over me this day ; save me from every evil thing . Good Lord hear me , and grant me whatever thou knowest to be best for me , for Jesus Christ's sake , in whose holy Name and Words , I pray , Our Father , &c. This Prayer may be likewise used at Night , by changing only two words , and saying , instead of [ preserving me this night ] [ preserving me this day ; ] and instead of [ watch over me this day ] [ watch over me this night . ] A Morning Prayer for Children , when they come to twelve or fourteen years of Age ; sooner or later , according to the ripeness of their understanding . LORD teach and assist me by thy Holy Spirit , to worship thee as I ought to do ; Lift up my heart unto thee . What shall I render unto thee , O most Gracious God , and most Merciful Father , for all thy Mercies to me , and to all the World ? I bless thee for making me a reasonable Creature , and for affording me all things which be needful to support my Life ; I bless thee for my health , liberty , and safety ; for my Food and Rayment ; for the use of my Reason and Vnderstanding , and of my Senses ; for thy corrections and deliverances ; and for all the advantages I have had by good Examples , and good Instructions : But chiefly , I praise and bless thee for the redemption of Mankind by the Lord Jesus Christ : That I was born within thy Church , where I was early given to thee in Baptism ; that I have had the benefit of Christian Education ; that thou hast afforded me the means of Grace , and called me to the hope of Glory . But notwithstanding thy goodness and love , I have gone astray from thee ; I have not cared so much as I ought to have done , to know thee , and to do thy Will , but have done my own will in many things , and followed my own foolish and sinful inclinations : I have broken many of thy most Holy and Just Laws , in Thought , Word , and Deed * , whereby I have deserved thy Wrath and Curse . Father of Mercies have mercy upon me , and forgive me all my sins for Jesus Christ his sake , who dyed for sinners . Give me a true and hearty Repentance for all mine iniquities ; that I may not wilfully break thy Laws any more . Make me always mindful of my Baptismal Covenant , to forsake the Devil and all his Works , to believe in God , and to serve him . Lord never leave me , nor forsake me . Hold up my goings in thy Paths , that my footsteps may not slide . Grant that hencesorth I may love thee with all my heart , and may be afraid to sin against thee : Work in me a true Faith , and a lively hope ; make me humble , meek , and patient , sober and temperate in all things , Charitable and Compassionate towards all that are in distress , true and faithful in my words , and sincere and upright in my Actions , well content and thankful in every condition of Life , and zealous for thy Glory . Grant that I may daily grow in Grace and Spiritual Knowledge . Create in me a clean Heart , and renew a right Spirit within me , and cause me to walk in thy ways . O Lord send thy Gospel through the World : Pour out plentifully the Blessings of thy holy Spirit on all thy People : Bless and preserve our King and Queen . Guide our Judges and Magistrates : Sanctifie and assist the Ministers of the Gospel . Be with all my Friends and Relations ; particularly bless and preserve my Father and Mother : Reward them for their care and kindness towards me : Make me a loving and dutiful Child unto them . * Comfort all that are in trouble , and sanctifie their afflictions to them . I thank thee , O Lord , for thy care of me this Night . Watch over me this Day . Bless and direct me in all I do or say . Keep me mindful that I am always in thy sight , that I may be in thy fear all the day long . Cause me to remember that I mus● shortly dye and come to judgment ; th●● I may not mispend my precious time , but employ it in a constant ●●d chearful Obedience to thy Holy and Righteous Laws ; that when this vain and short life is at an end , I may be made partaker of everlasting Li●● , through Jesus Christ our Lord ; in wh●● Holy Name and Words I pray , Our Father , &c. This Prayer may serve likewise at Night , until you come to the last part , which begins with these words , [ I thank thee , O Lord , for thy care of me this Night , &c. ] instead thereof , you may say as follows , [ I thank thee , O Lord , for thy care of me this Day ; watch over me this Night , and grant me quiet Repose ; save me from every Evil thing , for the sake of thy dear Son Jesus Christ , in whose Holy Name and Words , I conclude my Imperfect Prayers , saying , Our Father , &c. ] A Grace before Meat . WE Bless thee , O Lord , for making this Provision for us , who are less than the least of thy Mercies . Grant that by a moderate use of these thy good Creatures , we may be made more fit for thy Service , through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . After Meat . BLessed be thy Name , most Gracious God , for all thy Mercies freely bestowed upon us ; and for refreshing our Bodies at this time with thy good Creatures . Cause us to hunger and thirst after Righteousness : Feed our Souls with the Bread of Life : Let it be our Meat and Drink to do thy Will. Provide for all in want , through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen . FINIS . Notes, typically marginal, from the original text Notes for div A47513-e280 * Chrysost. Notes for div A47513-e690 Plat. l. 2. de Republ. Aristot l. 6. Politic. c. 1. Hierom Ep. 7. ad Laetam . Notes for div A47513-e2930 How Parents ought to be affected while Children are yet in the Womb. How they ought to be affected when their Children are born . The Right of Children to Baptism . Children are to be acquainted with Scripture Histories . † Plutar● in Lycurgo . What is to be done if they are sturdy and proud . If they be given to Lying . If they are Cunning and Deceitful . If they are peevish and passionate . If they are Revengeful and Malicious . If they are Jealous and Suspitious . If they are too credulous . If they are Envious . If they are very impatient . If they love their Belly too well . * Xenophon ●●lls us , that the Dyet of the Persian Boys , till they were 16 or 17 years old , was Bread and Cresses ; their Drink was Water . Paediae Cyr. lib. 1. If they discover any tendency to Vnchast and Immodest Actions . * Nil dictu● f●dum visuq●e , haec limina ●angat , intra quae 〈◊〉 est . Proc●● hinc proc●l inde 〈◊〉 L●●●num , & Cantus per●●●●● parasit● . Maxima debet●r p●ro Reverentia , &c. Juven . Sat. 14. If they curse 〈…〉 . * Pythagoras forbad his Followers to Swear by the Gods , and required them 〈◊〉 to live , that they might be believed without an oath . Diog. Laert . in Pythag. Clinias , one of his Followers , chose rather to pay a Fine of 3 Talents , than to violate the Precept of his Master , tho' he could have made Oath very innocently . If they are very Changeable and Vaconstant . If they are surly and morose . * This way of instructing Children by Fables , was very much used in Ancient Times by the Wisest Nations ; see Plato Dialog . 2. de Repub. & Strabo , lib. 15. Geograph . If they are disrespectful to Aged Persons . * Plutarc . Laco●● . Apop●● . * Plutarc . Laco●● . Ap●p●● . If they quarrel much with one another . * De Fraterno Amore. If they are over curious to know their Lot and Fortune in the world . a That is , who foretelleth what is to come , and discovereth what it secret , by unlawful Arts. b That is , who judgeth one day lucky , and another dismal and unlucky , and therefore begins or forbears his Designs accordingly . c One that being in Covenant with Evil Spirits , calls upon them by certain Words and Rites , to get their assistance in some vain or bad Design or other . d One that calleth upon the Dead , and enquireth of them , as the Witch of Endor did . 1 Sam. 28. 8 , 9. &c. If they are unthankful to those who do them good and kind Offices . * Dixeris maledicta cuncta cum ingratum Hominem dixeris . See Xenoph . Paed. Cyr. l. 1. * See Plin. Hist. l. 8. c. 16. & Sen. de Benef . l. 3. c. 19. Aul. Gel. l. 5. c. 14. If they are of too pr●digal a Temper . If they are Covetous . * Inde fere scelerum causae . Juven . Sat. 14. If they are naturally melancholy . If they are of too gay and airy a Temper . If they are Rash and Forward . About chusing a fit Person to teach them to read . About keeping them at School . Great care ought to be taken what Books they read . What they should do before they go to Church . How they should carry themselves at Church . What they should do when they come from Church . Why the Lord's Day ought to be kept . * Ambr. de Pentec . Ser. 61. Children are to be possessed with a great regard for the Ministers of the Gospel . * They who joyn with us in the publick Worship , ought to think of their Obligation to this Duty , when they hear these words of the Litany , ●O God we have heard with our Ears , and our Fathers have declared unto us the Noble Works that thou didst in their days , and in the old time before them . See Ps. 44. 1. 1. They must give their Children good Example . 2. They must chuse good Company for them . * Etiam sine Magistro vitia discuntur . Sen. The great Danger that Children are in from Flatterers . * Quintilian de causis corruptae Eloquentiae . Advice to Parents who send their Children abroad to Travel . 3. They must , as need requires , reprove and chasten their Children : and how ? Parents ought in correcting their Children , to follow the Example of our Heavenly Father . Parents must be careful not to oppose one another , when they c●rrect and reprove their Children . 4. They must carefully improve the Time of their Childrens Sickness , or of any other afflictions they meet with , towards the making of them wiser and better . 5. They must daily pray to God for them . Against those who curse their Children . † The Blessing of the Father Establisheth the Houses of Children , but the Curse of the Mother rooteth out Foundations . Ecelus . 3. 9. * See Augustin . de Civ . Dei , l. 22. c. ●8 . & Plato de legg . l. 34. dial . 11. 1. Motive , from the Divine Command . 2. Motive , from its being a work worthy of the utmost care and pains of Parents . 3. Motive , from the Rewards which attend those , who faithfully do these things . 4. Motive , from the great Benefit which comes both to Church and State by the good Education of Children . * See Plutarch in Lycurgo . Heraclid . de Politiis . Xenophon paed . Cyr. lib. 1. 5. Mo●ive , from the s●d Effects which attend the neglect of these Duties . * Augustin . To. 10. Ser. 33. 〈◊〉 Fratres in Eremo . Notes for div A47513-e9690 1. Duty , it belongs to the Mother to give suck to her Children . * Aulus Gellius . lib. 12. cap. 1. See likewise Plutarch de Educ . 2. Duty , about Childrens Diet. 3. Duty , about Childrens Apparel . 1. Duty , to chuse a fit Trade for them . * See Plut. in Solone . ●dvice to those who have great Estates and Riches , to bestow on their Children . * 'T was excellently said by Agefilans King of ●acedemon , We must teach Children what they should do when they are Men. * Plutarch . de Educat . * Antigonus used this as an Argument to induce Zeno the Philosopher to come to him . You may , said he , be well assured , that , by teaching and instructing me , you will at the same time instruct all the Macedonians : For he who contributes towards the making the King of Macedon a Virtuous Person does in great measu●● disp se all his Subjects for Virtuous Impressions : For such as Rulers and Princes be , such likewise ordinarily are they who depend upon the●● Diog. Laert. in Zenone . Advice to those , who intend to set apart one or more of their Children for the Holy Ministry . 2. Duty , about disposing of them in Marriage . * Callias the Athenian , was highly commended by the Greeks , because he gave his Daughters leave to chuse what Husbands themselves liked best . Herodot . in Erato . * Plut. in Themistocle . * The sad Effects of marrying very leud and profligate Persons . 3. Duty , about providing somewhat that may be the foundation of their comfortable subsistance in the World. Great Prudence and Caution ought to be used in bestowing their Worldly Goods on their Children . 4. Duty to have their Will and Testament in Readiness . The great Inconvenience of delay in this matter . Great care to be taken in the choice of Guardians for Children . * 'T was an Athenian Law , that they should not be chose● Guardians , who have a right to the Childrens Estate , after their Decease . Diog. Laert. in Solo●e . 1. They ought to consider that it is the Lord who does it . 2. They ought to consider that their Children were born mortal . 3. They should consider from whence , and whither they are gone . 4. They should consider that there will be a Resurrection . 5. They should consider that their giving way to excessive Grief and Mourning , can do no good , but will certainly do a great deal of hurt . The Duty of Parents on their Death-Bed . 1. Duty , to give their Children good Advice . 2. Duty , to pray to God for them . 3. Duty , to commend them to some Faithful Friends . Concerning the Duties of Step-Fathers and Step-Mothers , or Fathers and Mothers in Law : Some Motives to stir them up to do their Duty . The Duties of Guardians . Some Motives to excite Guardians to do their Duty . Prayers for the Morning and Evening , to be used in Families . * Or Evening . * Or , the past day . † O● ▪ , this night . * If there be Brothers and Sisters let them pray for them likewise . * Here they may make a particular Confession of their Sins . * If there be any Brothers or Sisters , he may pray for them , and for Grandfather and Grandmother , if they be alive . 
A60344	----	An earnest call to family-religion, or, A discourse concerning family-worship being the substance of eighteen sermons / preached by Samuel Slater. Slater, Samuel, d. 1704. 1694 Approx. 602 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 171 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2003-05 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A60344 Wing S3961 ESTC R25152 08781094 ocm 08781094 41798 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A60344) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 41798) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 1269:13) An earnest call to family-religion, or, A discourse concerning family-worship being the substance of eighteen sermons / preached by Samuel Slater. Slater, Samuel, d. 1704. [14], 312, [8] p. Printed for Tho. Parkhurst and John Lawrence, London : 1694. Reproduction of original in the Union Theological Seminary Library, New York. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. 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Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Family -- Religious life -- Sermons. Sermons, English -- 17th century. 2003-01 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2003-02 SPi Global Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2003-03 Jennifer Kietzman Sampled and proofread 2003-03 Jennifer Kietzman Text and markup reviewed and edited 2003-04 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion AN Earnest Call TO FAMILY-RELIGION : OR , A DISCOURSE CONCERNING FAMILY-WORSHIP . Being the Substance of Eighteen Sermons . Preached by SAMVEL SLATER , A.M. Minister of the Gospel . LONDON : Printed for Tho. Parkhurst , at the Bible and Three Crowns in Cheapside ; and Iohn Lawrence , at the Angel in the Poultrey . 1694. THE EPISTLE DEDICATORY . To that Church of Christ which Meets at Crosby-Square in London . Dearly Beloved in our Lord , OUR Blessed God is what he was , and will be what he is , without variableness or shadow of turning , Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour , is the same yesterday , and to day , and for ever ; Godliness also is the same in its Nature and Work , in its Excellency and Glory . The Reward which followeth after is the same likewise , no less than an undisturbed rest , and joy unspeakable , a Crown of Life , an exceeding weight of Glory , together with a Kingdom that cannot be shaken . But alass ! alass ! there is a wonderful abatement and decay in the Practical part of Religion , and an apparent vast difference between the generality of Professors at this day , and those who lived in former times . The Sun hath gone ten degrees backward , we have quarrelled and , fought , disputed , and wrangled the life and power of Godliness almost out of the Nation . There is indeed something of an empty formal Religion abroad , but there is very little or none of the Truth and Power at home . There is so little done for God in the Houses of many who call themselves Christians , that one would take them not for Christians , but Atheists , and conclude them without God in the World , yea , and that altogether ; for there is no Praying in their Families , no Reading of the Scriptures , no Singing of Psalms , no Repeating of Sermons , no Catechizing of young ones , who would not take these for Heathens , if they did not call themselves something else ? It was certainly of God , and I hope in Love to this poor , but dear City ( the place of my Nativity ) that there lately was such a ready and general agreement among the Dissenting Ministers , at the same time in their several Congregations to Preach up Family-Piety , and Worshiping of God. That very thing afforded to me great matter of rejoycing , and no small ground of hope that God will not yet break up House , nor deprive us of his Gospel-presence , which is far more desirable , because incomparably more worth than all the World ; for if the Ark be lost , other things will go with it ; but what ever else remains , we may well write Ichabod upon London , and if there , then upon England , for the Glory is departed from them . But amidst the bad Symptoms that are among us , there are two of a benign and kind aspect , viz. the Magistrates encouraging the suppression of Prophaneness , and the Ministers endeavouring the advancement of Godliness ; among the rest of my Brethren I applied my self to the work , looking up to the ever blessed God for assistance , without whom I know my self able to do nothing ; but he was not wanting to his poor unworthy Servant , but graciously pleased to come in , and make his power known . Before I had waded far and Preached often upon the Subject , I heard many were much affected , and several of you signified your desire ( wherein as you said , you were not alone ) that when this Discourse was finished it might be published . I am not so foolish as to be ambitious of appearing in Print , that indeed is Vain-Glory . I have also reason to know how difficult a a work it is for him who hath his full load already , to prepare so many Sermons for the Press , and to be in daily expectation of Dunning by the Printer , yet could I not find in my heart to deny you , from and for whom I have so great a dearness of affection . Your desire could not but obtain being arm'd and back'd with powerful Considerations , for it could not but be very pleasant to me to hear that wholsom Truths and Counsels dish'd in by me , though poorly dress'd by so mean a Cook , should as savoury Meat , find so great acceptance , and be so very sweet to your tast ; also it delighted me to argue and conclude thus . Surely these my Friends that are so pleased with the Doctrine , are not strangers to the Practice , but they and their Houses do serve the Lord. And there was a third thing , which like a dead weight carried it , it perfectly conquer'd all my aversness , gain'd my consent , and of unwilling render'd me free ; viz. Your confident perswasion that the good this Discourse will do , will abundantly compensate the pains that I must necessarly take about it , not liking the bitterness of Passive Obedience , and letting it alone as long as I can , I was hereby brought to be at perfect peace with a Non-Resistance in the present case . I have now done my Part , and the Printer his ; your desire is accomplished , the Book you see abroad , may your hope and expectation be accomplished too . May these Sermons of mine , so far as they convey the truths of God , be as sweet to all that shall read them , as they were to you in the hearing , though as I must confess , that is too great a wish , a thing scarce to be look'd for ; since as a late Worthy Writer observed , there is as much difference between Sermons Preached , and Sermons Printed , as there is between Milk in the Breast , and Milk in the Bottle . Yet I am sure of this , that they will be full out as sweet to them that shall read them , as they were to you when you heard them , if the Divine and All-quickning Spirit will graciously vouchsafe to take them and Preach them to their hearts ; and of this also I am no less sure , that they will be found having in them a delicious sweetness , by all those upon whom they shall fall with an overcoming power . And that is it , yea , that is it which I do heartily beg , and gladly would obtain for you that are my Charge , viz. That all those Scripture Truths , which being sent of my great and glorious Master I bring you , and in which your precious Souls are most nearly and everlastingly concerned , may come not in word only , but in power ; you , like Mettal cast into the Mould , being delivered up to that form of Doctrine which is delivered unto you , in order to your being informed by it , conformed to it , and transform'd by the renewing of the Spirit of your Mind , and so be able to say , this is true in the Scripture , and it is so in me ; this I hear , and this I feel , this God hath spoken , and this I believe ; thus I am commanded , and thus I live , thus I do . This , and that , and the other the Ministers of Christ tell me is my Duty , and prove it such , and my Conscience bears me witness that it is my delight . The good Lord hide Pride from every one of you , it is so odious a thing , that it looks well in no body ; may you be as knowing , as loving , and as well accomplished a People as any in the World. May you have the dew of Heaven , and the fatness of the Earth , may you be richly stor'd with grace , and come behind in no gift , thoroughly furnished for every good work , yea , and fill'd with all the fulness of God ; but withall , be very humble , great in value and usefulness , but little in your own eyes , that will not be to your loss , but much to your advantage , for God gives grace to the Humble , and no less to your Honour ; Humility eclipseth and obscures no Mans glory , but sets a singular lustre and gloss upon it , making it shine with a greater brightness . Holy and Humble Paul was one of the most Eminent Servants God ever had in the World , and his speaking of himself as being less than the least of all Saints , detracted nothing from his real worth , nor did it hinder his being equal with the chief of the Apostles , if we may speak of a chief among them ; among whom our Lord appointed a Parity ; at that time there was no such thing as a Pope . I would not speak one word to swell or puff any of you up , if you study and know your selves as you ought , you will soon find defects , infirmities , corruptions enough to keep the best of you down , yet I cannot but say you are my Joy , and Crown , and as I do every day make mention of you in my Prayers ; so I can , and frequently do bless and give thanks to my God upon my remembrance of you , and that upon sundry accounts , which I speak of for your encouragement , and the promoting your farther progress . I have reason to hope it is the true grace of God in which you stand , and as you have a Name to live , so you have been made partakers of the Life it self ; for as you do all make a good and excellent Profession ; so I know none of you that stain and contradict it by a scandalous walking . You have been stedfast in shaking and falling Times ; some did indeed go off in the Days of sore Persecution , not having on the whole Armour of God , nor being able to indure Hardship as the good Souldiers of Jesus , but they were few , so few that we did not miss them , we do not want them ; the Lord grant that they may find Mercy of the Lord at the great Day , I shall be glad to meet them in Heaven . You have received and ow●●d me as an Angel or Messenger of God , and the delight you take in my Ministry hath evidenced it self ( and still doth ) by your constant attendance upon it . In this Sceptick Age you have been Wise to Sobriety ; in this Erroneous Age you have been sound in the Faith , neither admiring the pretended new Lights , nor falling in love with those old rotten Errours which some have dig'd out of their Graves : In this dividing Age you have kept the Unity of the Spirit in the Bond of Peace ; you are not for taking up a Yoke of Bondage , but for standing fast in that Liberty wherewith Christ hath made you free , yet no Friends to Licenciousness . While you flee to the Gospel for Relief and Comfort , you own the Law for your Rule , you do not divide Christ , but take him just as God hath exalted him , and doth offer him , Prince as well as Saviour ; and not only to be an underling to pay your Debts , and bear your Burdens , and die for your Offences , but likewise to be a King upon his Throne Commanding and Ruling you . And as you rely only upon him for Righteousness , so you desire to imitate and follow him in his Holiness , and to shew forth his Vertues , who hath called you out of Darkness into his marvellous Light. Am I mistaken in any of you as to these things , I hope I am not , the Lord grant I may not ; I know of no wild Notions , nor loose Opinions among you , may there never be any , but all of you have ( as one said ) Heads well-hearted and Hearts well-headed , and so a soundness throughout . May you approve your selves to God and Men , being good Christians , good Subjects , good Citizens , good Husbands and Wives , good Parents and Children , good Masters , Mistresses and Servants , good Friends and Neighbours , filled with the Holy Ghost and Goodness , and all the Fruits of Righteousness ; Love God , Father , Son , and Spirit with a supreame , intire , and most intense love ; think the most vehement flame of your love too cold here : Love the Church of God , study , seek , and pray for her good : Love all that love the Lord Jesus Christ in sincerity , though in some things they differ from you , let not that cause any alienation in Affection so long as they hold the Head , count them Brethren , and be dear over them as such ; love one another , help one another , quicken , strengthen , comfort one another , provoke one another to Love and good Works ; rejoice in one anothers Mercies , sympathize with one anothers Afflictions , bear one anothers Burdens , and so fulfil the Law of Christ. Most dearly Beloved , my Mouth is open to you , and my Heart enlarged . The great God knows I do as really desire and pray for the Prosperity and Salvation of you all , and of all yours as I do mine own ; and in the following Sermons I have commended no other things to you than what I believe and know to be both your Duty and Interest , and would my self be found in the practice of ; if we call our selves Christians let us be Christians , Israelites , and Israelites indeed ; what signifies the Name without the thing ? Gird up , I beseech you , gird up the Loins of your Minds , make no trifling Objections , listen not , yield not to any wicked Temptations , but apply to your Work ; act for God in your Places to the utmost ; shine bright in your own Sphere , keep your Hearts continually in an holy frame fit for Communion with God in Duty ; be not now backward to it , nor hereafter weary of it . Though you have but a little stock of Knowledge and Parts , fall to Trading and you will increase it . Be not discouraged because you cannot do what you would , God accepts of the Will ; when the Disciples were offended with a good Woman , Christ's plea for her was , She hath done what she could . The Lord told his Servant , he had been faithful in his little , and thereupon gave him an entrance into his Joy. Your little will find great acceptance , and be rewarded with great Blessings , so it be your Best . In short , would you stem the Tide of Profaneness which breaks in upon us with fury ? Would you save the Life of Practical Religion which is brought very low , and in a deep Consumption ? Would you be instrumental for the preserving of a Seed to serve the Lord ? Would you be able to give a good account of your selves in the Day when God shall come to Reckon with you ? And do you desire the present and future welfare of those precious Souls which are committed to your Care , then observe the Rules , and follow the Counsels of God which are given in this Book . And the God of Heaven accept you in the Beloved , grant your Petitions , water the Seed you sow , and bless both you and yours , and make you Blessings to one another , and all of you Blessings to the City , and the Nation . I do heartily pray for you ; I need your Prayers too , and earnestly beg them ; do not deny me , do not forget me , in praying for me you pray for your selves . The gracious Good-will of him that dwelt in the Bush be upon you , let God compass you about with his Favour as with a Shield , and make you Rich in Blessings of the Right Hand , and of the Left : And Oh! that you and I may at last meet in Heaven , and there , together with the Saints and Angels , Sing Eternal Allelujahs to God and the Lamb ; so prays Your Souls Friend and Servant in our Dearest Lord ; Samuel Slater . From my Study , Mar. 23. 1694. Family Worship . Joshua 24 , 15. As for me and my house , we will serve the Lord. THese are the words of Ioshua , once the Servant , afterward the Successor of Moses , a great Man , and good too , and this is an excellent pair , how sweet and amiable in a conjunction , like pure White and Red , they make a curious complexion , and render a person indeed Noble and Illustrious . Goodness with Greatness is like a rich and sparkling Diamond sett in a Ring of Gold. This good and great Man had followed the Lord , not halting nor by halves , but fully ; and it pleased God , who takes special notice of his faithful Servants , to reward him by exalting him ; Moses having , as an Instrument in the Divine hand , brought the Children of Israel out of Egypt , and carried them through a wast and howling Wilderness to the very Borders of the promised Land : God called him off , having no more for him to do , commanded him to go up to Mount Nebo , and die there , in order to his happy Transportation to a better Countrey , the Celestial Canaan , the Inheritance of the Saints in Light , and chose Ioshua for the Man that must compleat that great and glorious work , and put that beloved People into the actual possession of that good Land. This being done , and Ioshua now grown old , and finding himself after so many tedious Journeys and hard Labours sit and ready to go to his Long home , to his Everlasting Rest , He gathered all the Tribes of Israel , and the Chief Men among them unto Sechem ; if any ask why thither ? I answer ; it is by some conceived , and not without an appearance of reason , because after that Abraham had in obedience to the Divine Command , gone out of his own Countrey , and from his Fathers house , God did there first appear to him , and gave him the Promise of the Land of Canaan , and upon that he did there first build an Altar unto the Lord , as you may read in Gen. 12.6 , 7. And also because not long after their entrance into the Promised Land Ioshua himself had in Mount Ebal , which was near unto Shechem , built an Altar unto the Lord God of Israel , and wrote upon the Stones a Copy of the Law of Moses , and so renewed the Covenant between God and them , as we find , Iosh. 8.30 , 31 , 32. But that may suffice to be spoken as to the reasons of his gathering them unto Shechem . Having there assembled them , He began with giving them in the Name of the Lord , a very short , but pithy Narrative of those great and wonderful things which had been by God done for them all along from the mercy that had been shewn unto Abraham their Father to his giving them the Land of Canaan according as he had promised . And then in his own Name He followed that Relation with a very serious and warm Exhortation grounded thereupon ; verse 14. Now therefore fear the Lord , and serve him in sincerity and truth , and put away the Gods which your Fathers served on the other side of the Flood , and in Egypt , and serve ye the Lord. He knew what an uncertain and fickle People they were , and so did endeavour to fix them ; and if they had any ingenuity ▪ any sense of kindness , to bind them to God with these Silken Cords of Love and Goodness . In this 15th verse He bids them chuse , in case they did not like what he had propounded , then think of one under whose Government and Protection they might promise themselves a secure and comfortable Being . If it seem evil to you to serve the Lord , chuse you this day whom ye will serve , whether the Gods which your Fathers served that were on the other side of the Flood , or the Gods of the Amorites , in whose Land ye dwell ; which you must not look upon as a permission or allowance , or leaving them to themselves , as in a matter indifferent , whether they would worship the true God , or turn Idolaters : For in the preceding Chapter he had earnestly persuaded and charged them , vers . 6. to be very couragious to keep and do all that is written in the Book of the Law of Moses , not turning aside therefrom , neither to the right hand nor to the left : And vers . 7. That they come not among the Nations , that remain among them , neither make mention of the Name of their Gods , nor cause to swear by them , neither serve them , nor bow themselves to them . But vers . 8. cleave unto the Lord Jehovah their God : And v. 11. to take good heed unto themselves , that they liv'd the Lord their God. And again in this Chapter , v. 14. Fear the Lord , and serve him in sincerity and truth . But in this way he endeavours sweetly to insinuate , and to get within them , and by an holy Art prevail with them to oblige and bind themselves to God : very well knowing that People care not for doing what they are forc'd to do ; but without a blush depart from that which they were brought to by meer constraint ; whereas they are pleas'd with their own choice , and are most likely to stand firm to that unto which they have in Judgment , and upon due deliberation engag'd themselves . In order therefore to a wise Election , which they may never have cause with sorrow and shame to reflect upon , he doth on the one hand set before them the greatness , excellency and glory of God , together with those many and singular advantages that will accrue to them who are his faithful Servants ; and on the other hand he sets before them the vanity and baseness of Idols , the folly of those that own and serve them , and the mischiefs which do pursue them , and will for certain overtake them ; and hereupon after a due weighing and comparing of things he would have them make their choice of one or the other , being guided therein by right reason , and their true Interest . He knew , that God would have his People serve him out of choice ; as he chuseth them , so he would be chosen by them . And for a motive and inducement , he acquaints them with his own fixed and unalterable resolution , whom they had by long experience found to be a gracious and holy Man , a prudent and loving Governour , a valiant and successful Warriour . And we may conceive him speaking thus to them ; O ye seed of Abraham ! if ye be given to change , so am not I : If after all that God hath been to you , and done for you , you will be so ingrateful as to forget and forsake him , so will not I. He hath all along been so gracious a God to us all , that he shall be my God for ever and ever : I am so well , so happy with him , that I cannot mend my self : I can be no where better , no where so well , therefore I will abide with him ; as in the Text , I and my house will serve the Lord. This was his holy resolve , and to this he would stand , there could be no reason to the contrary ; and as for the example of Apostates , it should wi●h with him be of no significancy , nor would he be carried down by the stream . He was , and would be for God , be they for whom they would . In the words there are these things observable . First , The thing he resolved upon , which he had in his heart and purpose ; that was , to serve , while others of towring and ambitious spirits are altogether for commanding and Lording it , this good Man was for serving . Though he was a Prince , a great General , yet did he not look upon it as a disparagement and below him to be a Servant . No more did holy David afterward , the King of Israel , even when he had been called from following the Sheep , and placed upon the Throne , he knew how still to serve , and lov'd to do it ; the King of Israel thought it no dishonour to serve the God of Israel , and therefore he with joy took upon him the name , Servant ▪ reckoning it his highest and most honourable Title , Psal. 116.16 . O Lord , truly , I am thy Servant , I am thy Servant . This service is made up of Acts of Worship performed to the Divine Majesty , and a Life of Obedience to the Divine Will. In it there is Liberty , yea most perfect Freedom ; those that are strangers to it are the worst of Slaves ; in it is the highest honour . To be one of God's Servants , is more noble than to be one of the World's Monarchs : And in it is the greatest comfort , Isa. 65.13 , 14. Thus saith the Lord God , Behold , my Servants shall eat , but ye shall be hungry ; behold , my Servants shall drink , but ye shall be thirsty ; behold , my Servants shall rejoyce , but ye shall be ashamed ; behold , my Servants shall sing for joy of heart , but ye shall cry for sorrow of heart , and shall howl for vexation of spirit . Secondly ; Here is the Person to whom the Service is to be performed ; not to Idols , not to Devils , not to Sin , the wages of which is death ; not to divers Lusts , which are tyrannical and cruel , but Iehovah , that is the word in the Original , the Lord , the Lord of Lords , the Lord of Life and Glory , the God of Abraham , Isaac and Iacob , the Lord God of Israel , whose Commandments are not grievous , but his Yoke is easie , and his Burden is light , his Yoke being lin'd with his Love , and his Burden having Wings . Thirdly ; Here are the Persons , by whom this Service is to be performed unto this God ; We , i. e. I and my house ; I my self , not only call others to the work , but also set my own hand to it , lead them the way : I will serve the Lord , and all that are mine shall do it together with me . Rather than not serve God at all , he would serve him alone . Ioshua would leave Israel if they would leave God. But he would not serve God alone so long as he could have company , so long as there were any that he could influence , any that he could rule and command ; they that will live in my house shall serve my God ; they that would enjoy the comfort of my house , shall joyn in the work and duty of my house ; We will serve the Lord. Exemplum proponitur Gubernandae Familiae , saith Masius . Here is set before us an excellent Pattern , or good Example for the ordering and governing of a Family . Oh that it may be followed by all those who call themselves Christians , and own Iehovah for the Lord their God! That a Christian Profession and Practical Atheism may not meet in them . The Doctrine which I raise from these words , and offer to your most serious consideration as the Truth of God , to be believed by you , received in Love , and obeyed from the Heart , is this . Doct. It is the great duty of all those whom God hath made Heads or Governours of Families , to set up Religious Duties and the Worship of God in their respective Families . Oh that God would so assist and succeed me in the handling hereof , and accompany what shall delivered with such power upon your Consciences and Hearts , as by that time I have finished these Discourses , there may not be one Prayerless Family belonging to this numerous Congregation ! How greatly then would my Soul bless God , and with what comfort and joy should I look upon you ! It is both a wicked and miserable thing for any to be without God in the World , Ephes. 2.12 . He is so great , so necessary a good , that nothing can possibly supply the want of him . Notwithstanding Moon and all the Stars , it is night with us when once the Sun is departed off our Horizon . God is absolutely necessary for us , and our All is due to him . Single persons must know it to be their duty and interest to serve and worship God in their Capacities , as Publickly in the Gates of Sion , which God loves , in the Assemblies of the Saints , unto which they ought to joyn themselves as followers of the same Lord , and Members of the same Body ; so singly and alone , let their Chambers and Closets be Witnesses for them that they do not live in an ingrateful and wicked unmindfulness of God. Let Children begin betimes with God. Let young Men and Maids have early converses with God , waiting upon him , and walking with him : And when they come to alter their condition , and to have Yoke-fellows and Families , let them be careful to set up the Worship of God in them ; though let them still remember to keep up their retirements . It is not enough for them to worship God in their Families , but they ought to do it in their Chambers too ; nor is it enough for them to worship God in their Chambers , but they ought to do it in their Families too . Let not these jostle nor exclude one another , but as Sister-duties live sweetly together under the same Roofs . In private Duties the holy Soul hath the greater liberty , from Family-duties God hath the greater Honour . Secret duties are plainer Evidences of Sincerity , Family and publick duties are of larger influence and usefulness . As for me and my house , we will serve the Lord : We will unite in his Service , not only approve of it , or consent to it , but joyn in it . Take here with you these two things . First ; The Service of God should begin as soon as the Family begins . This I desire Young ones to consider of , who are entring into the World , and setting upon House-keeping ; lay this down as an undeniable Maxim , that it is best beginning with God ; so to do is both duty and wisdom . That Man who doth not carry God along with him , is like to miscarry by the way , and at last lie down in sorrow : He opens his door to the Devil ( that will bring very bad company along with him ) who at his first entrance upon House-keeping shuts God out , and turns his back upon him , or at least doth not invite him . It is not feasting , not eating and drinking together ( tho' that is lawful and friendly ) but Prayer that will prove the best House-warming . Secondly ; As it is good beginning with God , so it is as good holding on : To be weary of well doing argues a bad temper of Soul ; to throw up duty is sin , and shews plainly that a person was never upright in it , never hearty to it , never really tasted the sweetness of it , Iob 27.10 . Will the Hypocrite delight himself in the Almighty ? will he always call upon God ? No , neither ; and because not the former , therefore not the latter , because God is not his delight , Prayer will not be his constant business ; he hath in his heart no suitableness to God , and therefore no pleasure in his Service ; but such as have been sincere in it will be stedfast , and indeed they will never find any reason for the giving of it over . God is as full and free as ever he was , the Trade of Godliness as safe and sure , and the returns as considerable . God can with as much cause and boldness appeal now to those that shall desert him , and throw up Religious Exercises , as formerly he did to ungrateful Israel , Ier. 2.5 . What iniquity have your Fathers found in me , that they are gone far from me , and have followed after vanity , and are become vain ? He well knew , tho' he could charge vanity and folly upon them , and make good the charge , yet they could not justly charge iniquity upon him . And so again , verse 37. Have I been a Wilderness unto Israel , or a Land of Darkness ? No , no , not a Wilderness , but a fruitful Field ; not a Land of Darkness , but a Goshen , a Sun of Righteousness ; and such as have been indeed his Servants , have continued firm and faithful , liking him too well , and loving him too dearly to leave him . Will ye go away ? said Christ to his Disciples ; Peter desired not time to consider of it , but had his Answer ready , which he immediately returns in the names of them all , Ioh. 6.68 . Lord , to whom shall we go ? thou hast the words of Eternal Life . Ioshua had served and followed God for a great many years : He was now grown old , and his Experiences of God's care and goodness had more multiplied and encreast to a far greater number than his days , and thereupon he saw abundant reason for resolving to continue in his Service . And so did holy Polycarp the Disciple of St. Iohn , for being tempted to deny Christ , and return to Heathen Idolatry , he briskly replied , I have served my Master Christ now these fourscore years , and all along found him a good Master to me , therefore I will not leave him now . And if you will believe David , he assures you they are all of the same mind , Psal. 84.4 . Blessed are they that dwell in thy house , they will be still praising thee ; they are and will be so , always delighting in his Work , and always commending and glorying in their Lord. But yet for the further opening to you the duty it self , I must acquaint you with two things which are incumbent upon the Governours of Families , and which they are bound carefully to look after ; viz. 1. That God be served in their Families . 2. That they and their Families do together serve him . First ; It is the duty of Family-Governours to take care that there be the Service and Worship of God in their Families ; that they themselves do serve the Lord , and that their Children do serve him , yea and that also their Servants do serve him . That as the precious Ointment poured out upon the Head of Aaron ran down to the skirts of his Garments ; so Religion , and at least , the outward practices of Piety , may sweetly descend from the Head of the House to the inferiour and meanest Members of it . You , Masters , Mistresses , and Parents , ought to take care , not only that your Children be respective and obedient to you , nor only that your Servants be faithful to you , and industrious in their working for you ; but likewise that both the one and the other do perform their duty to God as well as to you , and be far more ready to pass by a failure in them with respect to your selves , than to bear with a contempt and neglect of God. Do not only see to the feeding and cloathing of your Children and Servants , but as they are capable of receiving it , do you feed their Minds with Knowledge , and exercise them unto Godliness ; and let it not be your desire only or chiefly that they may live well and comfortably , but that they may live holily ; that they may live like Christians , as well as like Men. The Apostle's charge is this , Rom. 12.17 . Provide things honest in the sight of all men . Now I will appeal to your Consciences , wh●●her it be not so to fear and serve God , to pray and seek God , to worship God , to perform duty to God ; this cannot but be honest , 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , good , very good , amiable and becoming in the sight and account of all men , except those that are Atheists , and because of their being Atheists , do not deserve the name of Men , but have forfeited the name , since they contradict the very Light of Nature , and run counter to the dictates of Reason , and are sit to herd only among the Beasts . And if that notion be true ( which some have embrac'd , and I do not reject ) that it is not Reason so much as Religion which is the specifical Difference , and doth distinguish between a Man and a Brute , because there is something of Reason to be found in Brutes , at least , call it by what name you please , some shadow of Reason , some Resemblance , something that may claim a little Kindred , whereas there is not to be found in them any thing that looks like Religion , no appearance nor footsteeps of it ; then we may very well say , without being guilty of injustice , or doing a real injury , That Atheists do deserve , with Nebuchadnezzar , to be driven from among Men , until they have with him learnt to own , praise , extel and honour the King of Heaven , all whose works are Truth , and his ways Iudgment , and those that walk in Pride he is able to abase ; but at the present they are degenerate , and no better than Beasts in the mapes of Men. For they deny a Being to him by whom all things are , to him who is the Fountain of all Being , and the Author of their own ; they do not only cast off a Religious Life , and live without all acts of Divine Worship , but also they do , as much as in them is , take away the Object of it , in whom they live , and move , and have their Being , and by this one thing open a wide and effectual door to Villanies of all sorts . But from the Scripture last named , it is evident to all those that do believe the Scripture , that it is your duty to provide things honest ; such things as are good and lovely . See that all in your Families be honest , that they be honest to you and to one another , and to the Great God ; that they give unto every one their due , unto God his due ; that they do not rob God , nor with-hold from him that which is meet , and that is , Worship . Honour is not so due to Parents , nor Service to Masters as Worship is to God , Ier. 10.5 . Who would not fear thee , O King of Nations , for to thee it doth appertain . The fear of God is there put not only for the Holy Affection of fear , which we should keep up all the day , and carry with us into every place ; but likewise for all Divine Worship , which upon all accounts he may challenge at our hands : It appertains to him , he hath an undoubted right to it . For God to crown Man at first with Glory and Honour , and make him have Dominion over the works of his hands ; was an Act of Goodness : For God to spare fallen sinful Man , to keep him out of Hell , and afford him any comforts of Life ; is an Act of Mercy , Lam. 3. It is of the Lords Mercies we are not consumed . But for Man to Own and Honour God , to Fear , Seek , Serve and Worship God ; is an Act of Iustice. And let men provide what they will for their Families , for their Wives , Children and Servants ; let them see to it that they have all things richly to enjoy : Yet if in this one particular they be negligent and careless , if they do not see to it , that those who Live with them do Serve and Worship God ; they do not provide that which is Honest. Observe the Resolution of Holy David and imitate his Example , Psal. 101.6 . Mine Eyes shall be upon the Faithful of the Land. i. e. Good Men , that will be every way faithful to me , and to my God as well as to me . Men that do not only profess him , but will be true to that Profession . Men that call him Master , and will serve him as such , that they may dwell with me ; he would delight in their company , and count them the Ornaments of his House . He that walketh in a perfect way , he shall serve me . The perfect way is the way of God's Commandments , the Scripture way , the way of Holiness and Duty , the way Everlasting . He that walketh in such a way is a Man for me , such an one I like , and such an one I will chuse ; such an one shall serve me as will serve my God as well as me . And he had said before , verse 4. that He would not know a wicked person . You must not understand it of a common ordinary knowledge , a nuda scientia , bare naked knowledge , for in that sense he did , and could not but know many , too too many ; but he would not know a wicked person so as to countenance him , not so know him as to make him his choice , and have fellowship with him . He that doth not fear God , that will not mind , serve and worship God , that is without God in the World , may well be branded for a wicked Man ; in all companies let him go for such an one : And , saith David , I will have nothing to do with that sort of men ; such a person shall be none of my Familiars , none of my intimate Acquaintance ; he shall be none of my Family , none of my Court. And it would be well for the World , if all Princes would say the same , and be as good as their word ; if they would not know wicked persons , fewer wicked persons would be known : Were there no wicked men in Favour at Courts , there would be fewer in the Cities , and fewer in the Countreys . But when they swarm at a Court , they flie about , and like Locusts overspread and cover the face of a Land. Secondly ; It is the duty of those who are Governours of Families , to take care , and so to order things , that they and their Families together do serve and worship God ; I say , that they do it together , that it be their joynt act , and that all concur to the making up of an holy Harmony . It is not enough that there is some Worshipping of God in the Family , but besides , over and above that there ought to be an holy Family-Worship . David saith , Psal. 133.1 . Behold , how good and how pleasant it is for Brethren to walk together in Vnity . It is a very commendable and lovely thing to see the same among Husbands and Wives , Parents and Children , Masters and Servants , Mistresses and Maids ; it is sweet dwelling together in Vnity ; but it is far more pleasant and delightful to God and all good Men , to see them dwelling and walking together in Piety . As to live together , and love together , and eat and drink together without any quarrels or contentions ; so to read the Sacred Scriptures , and other good Books together , and pray together , and sing Psalms together , and put forth other Acts of Religion . In short , how good and how pleasant is it to see them living together , not only a natural and civil Life , in Love and mutual Kindness , but likewise a gracious and holy Life in all goodness . So much may suffice for the opening to you , what I mean by setting up the Worship of God in Family . Now a person would think , that such as live in London , where there is so much Light , and plenty of Gospel-means ; specially such as own a God , and call themselves Christians , should not need many Arguments either to convince them that this is a Duty , or to persuade them to the performance of it ; but they would of themselves at the very mentioning of the thing assent to the goodness and reasonableness of it ; that all those who do profess their believing that there is a God , and their own standing in Relation to him , and having an Interest him as their God , should at their hearing of Family-Worship cheerfully acknowledge it to be his due . But , alas ! alas ! whatever the Light doth plainly discover , and whatever their well-informed and awakened Consciences do suggest to them , how many are there among us that imprison the Truth , and hold it in unrighteousness ! and by consequence how great is the number of them who live in the great , if not total neglect of this excellent work ? And I do not now speak of Atheists , nor of those who are scandalously wicked and prophane ; for it is not to be wondred at in them , since they have no fear of God before their Eyes . But I and others of my Brethren are greatly mis-inform'd , if the guilt hereof doth not cleave to some , yea to many of those who profess Religion , and have joyned themselves in Communion with those who do really desire and aim at the greatest strictness and most exact holiness ; so that there is apparent necessity of doing what we can towards the reviving of this excellent practice , which hath been by so many so unkindly , so sinfully shut out of doors . And to this end I shall do these two things . First ; I shall prove that the setting up of the Worship of God and Religious Exercises in Families is a Duty . Secondly ; Lay down some Arguments by which this may appear your reasonable Service . We begin with the former , That Family-worship is a Duty ; and that I prove by these three things : The Practice of the Heathen ; The Precepts of the Scripture ; And the Practice of Saints . I. This was the Practice amongst the Heathens ; though they had no more than the dim Light of Nature , yet by that they did see this to be their Duty ; These not having the Law written , were a Law to themselves ; and have done by Nature many of the things contained in the Law , Rom. 2.14 . And among others this . We find they had their Lares their Penates , such as they counted and called their Houshold-Gods , and unto them they did offer up Sacrifices in their Families , and unto them they did together perform acts of Religious Worship . And therefore Prayer to God in Families , is a part of Natural Worship , because discovered by Natural Light ; and for the shameful neglect thereof the poor blind Heathen will rise up against multitudes of the Men and Women of this untoward Generation . Shall they be more liberal to their Gods of Dung , than we are to the Lord of Glory ? Shall they do more for the Honouring of their false Gods , than some of us do for the living and true God who made Heaven and Earth , and who is the Author of your Being , the God of your Comforts , and the Father of all your Mercies ; by the Hand of whose Power ye were made , and upon whose Cost ye spend . How sore and dreadful punishment will you deserve if the very Heathen shall condemn you ! If they were more observant of their Idols than you are of God ; it will be unspeakably more tollerable for them in the Day of Judgment than for you . Think upon and apply to your selves what the Apostle Paul said to the wicked Jew , Rom. 2.27 . Shall not Vncircumcision which is by Nature if it fulfil the Law , Iudge thee who by the Letter and Circumcision dost transgress the Law ? The clearer that Light is which men do enjoy , if they rebel against it , the greater is the Sin which they commit , the greater is the guilt which they contract , and therefore the fiercer that wrath which they deserve . II. Family-Worshiping of God is the matter of the Precept . It is a burden , if any will be so vile as to think or call it so , which the great God , whose we are , hath bound upon us . Let me particularly instance in Family-Prayer , which sweet and precious Incense I would gladly have all your houses perfumed daily with . It must be granted , that it is not expresly commanded in Scripture , not totidem verbis , in so many words , but it is included in express commands , and from those commands , by necessary consequence it will appear to any one that doth not shut his own Eyes , to be the Mind and Will of God concerning us . For observe : First ; We are expresly commanded to make use of all Prayer . Take notice of that word , All , all Prayer , i. e. all kinds of holy Prayer , Ephes. 6.18 . The Apostle had before told them , they must wrestle with Principalities and Powers , and Spiritual Wickednesses in high places ; and having thereupon counsell'd them to make sure of a sufficient strength , being strong in the Lord , and in the power of his might , and Armour of Proof , the whole Armour of God , he doth here in this Verse advise them to a wrestling with God ; and indeed it is excellent advice ; for he that can like a Prince wrestle with God in a way of Supplication , will come off a Conqueror , when he is called out to wrestle with Devils in a way of Opposition . Observe the words , Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit , and watching thereunto with all perseverance , and supplication for all Saints . Mark that , with all prayer . Now there are many sorts of Prayer , namely , Ejaculatory Prayer , in which the holy Soul shoots out a Dart to Heaven , and on a sudden lifts a Request up to God ; which may be done at any time , and in any place , in Company , at Dinner , in the Street as you are walking , in the Shop as you are working or trading ; and in this way you may sweeten and sanctifie your worldly Affairs by mingling spiritual and gracious thoughts with them . Thus , while good old Iacob had his Sons before him , and was telling them what should befal them in the last days ; in the midst of it his Soul got on the wing and mounted up to Heaven in that short , but sweet expression , Gen. 49.18 . I have waited for thy Salvation , O Lord ! and there is stated , fixed prayer , when a person doth at appointed times , and in a solemn manner set it self to pour forth its Requests before God , and make its desires known to him . There is Publick Prayer , in the Congregations and Assemblies of the Saints , when not only two or three , but scores , hundreds , thousands are met together in the Name of Christ , and the Minister as the Mouth speaks to God , and the hearts of the People go along with him by a real consent , and to his Confessions , Petitions and Thanksgivings add their Amen . And there is Secret Prayer , performed in the greatest retirement , when a person hath withdrawn himself from all company , and no body seeth nor hears , but God alone , and so it can be more free and open , not hiding its groans from him , but spreading all its desires before him , and acquainting him with that which it would not have any one in the World besides to know . And then there is Family-Prayer , wherein the Governour gets the Children , and Servants , and all the Members thereof together , and goeth with them to the Throne of Grace in order to the paying of their Homage unto God , and the obtaining from God a blessing upon himself , and upon them . Now this kind of Prayer is in that Scripture required as well as any other . God doth here by the Apostle require our praying with all prayer , and if with all prayer , then with Family-prayer . Secondly ; We are commanded to pray every where , 1 Tim. 5.8 . I will that men pray every where , lifting up holy hands without wrath or doubting , 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , in every place ; not only in the Temple , and in the Synagogue , but every where , in any place where it is convenient , and you may be safe . As God is no respecter of Persons , so not of Places , as Beggars go up down scattering their Vermin in all places , and at every door ; so you should every where be scattering your Treasure in gracious discourses , and pouring out your Souls to God in prayer . Now , faith famous Mr. Perkins upon this very place ; if it be the duty of men to pray every where , then certainly in their Families , where God hath set them in so near a Relation one to another . Thirdly ; We are commanded to pray continually , or to pray always ; as in that fore-mentioned , Ephes. 6. Praying always , with all prayer . Which words of the Apostle we are not to understand , as if praying must ingross and take up all our time , and we had nothing else to do , but live Drones , like a company of lazy Beggars that will not work though they are able . Prayer indeed is a very considerable part of a Christians duty , yet it is but a part . There are various duties which he hath to perform , and much other work of the Lord , in which he ought to abound . There is reading of the Scriptures , singing of Psalms , hearing the Word , serious meditation and self-examination as well as prayer . There is instructing of Youth , and Catechizing of Children , and exhorting one another , and provoking one another to Love and to good works , as well as praying . Yea and there is tending of the Shop , and working in the Trade , and looking to the Children , and washing of the house , and providing for the Family , and several other things , and must be done . We must have respect to all Gods Commandments , and labour to fill up our places , and to stand compleat in all the will of God concerning us . Therefore when the Apostle speaks of our praying always ; understand it thus , pray in every thing ; for so we are required to do in another Scripture ; Phil. 4.6 . Be careful for nothing , i. e. with a distrustful care , with a solicitous and anxious care , with a distracting disquieting care ; But in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving make your requests known unto God. Pray in great things , as believing the greatness of God's Power ; and pray in little things , as believing also the extensiveness of his Care. Pray over thy Calling , because it is not the diligent hand alone , but the Divine Blessing with it that makes rich . Pray over your Meat and Drink , and go not to your Tables as Swine to their Trough , knowing that Creatures cannot befriend or serve you any further than as they are commissioned and assisted by God. When Ministers go to study , let them pray , because it is the Spirit of Truth that must lead them into all Truth . They will make sad work of it if God be not with their heads in studying their Sermons , and with their mouths in delivering them . And when People come to hear , let them pray , under and after all our Labours ; they will learn nothing to purppose , they will not be wise to Salvation , unless they are taught of God. Thus to pray alway , is to pray in every thing . Again ; To pray always , is to pray in every condition . When you are High , as knowing you are neither out of the reach of Trouble , nor too good to serve and wait upon God : And when you are Low , as knowing you are not out of the reach of the Everlasting Arms , but still there is hope in Israel concerning you . Pray in Sickness and in Health too , for it is God that must remove the former , preserve and continue the latter . Pray in Advrrsity , for it is God that must support and comfort under that , and Prosperity , for it is God that must sanctifie that , and give you an heart and wisdom to improve it . Pray in Trouble , that God would not be a Terrour to you , in Danger , that he would be a Defence to you , and the Rock of your Refuge , and in Peace , that your Halcion days may neither be overcast nor abus'd . By Prayer in Adversity shew your trusting in God , and believing no case to be desperate which he will please to undertake ; and by Prayer in Prosperity , shew to others your dependence upon God , and your expectations being wholly from him ; and that you live more upon a Father in Heaven , than you do upon any , or all the Creatures here below . Once again ; Pray always , that is , pray daily , pray every day . This is to be not only a Sabbath - days work , as I am inform'd , some penurious strait-lac'd Professors make it , no , no , it ought 〈◊〉 to be your every day-work . Sure I am , there is a great deal of reason for it . We do commit sin , and contract much guilt every day , therefore it becomes us to repent and confess , and it concerns us to sue out our pardon every day . We have our Dangers , visible and invisible Dangers every day , therefore should be daily hiding our selves under our Fathers gracious wing , and craving the Divine Protection . We have Mercies every day , a continued succession of them , an innumerable number of them ; they follow us , they load us , they compass us about , therefore we should have our Sacrifices of Praise , and as persons of ingenuity , pay our thankful acknowledgments to God every day . Further , we have our Wants every day , we want our daily Bread , and our daily Pardon ; we want daily Supplies . Our Cistern would soon be empty if God should cut off the stream of his goodness , we want daily Supports , and should quickly drop into the Grave , yea into nothing , if God should withdraw his hand , and let go his hold of us . And we want a daily blessing , without which all our contrivances are vain , and all our endeavours fruitless . If God do not say , go and prosper , we had as good sit still , and therefore there is very great reason why we should have our daily prayers . We are commanded by our Saviour to pray and not to faint ; for this end he spake a Parable , Luk. 18.1 . and by the Apostle , to continue instant in prayer , Rom. 12.12 . that is , to pray daily , which was signified and taught by the daily Sacrifice under the Law ; concerning which you may read in Exod. 29. It is said in the 42 verse , This shall be a continual Burnt-Offering thorow-out your Generations , at the door of the Tabernacle of the Congregation before the Lord , where I will meet you , to speak there unto thee . This shall be a continual Burnt-Offering , this , what ? If you look back to the 38th and 39th verses , you will see ; This is that which thou shalt offer upon the Altar , two Lambs of the first year day by day continually , the one Lamb thou shalt offer in the morning , and the other Lamb shalt thou offer at Even . Where you may take notice of this that the offering up of these two Lambs every day is called a continual Burnt-Offering . And Mr. Answorth upon the place tells us , that daily Sacrifice signified the continual sanctification of the Church through Faith in Christ the Lamb of God , by whose mediation we and our actions are accepted of God ; and likewise he there tells us , the Hebrew Doctors say , the continual Sacrifice of the Morning did make atonement for the sins that were done in the night , and the Evening Sacrifices made atonement for iniquities committed in the day . Now by a parity of Reason we may affirm , that praying every day Morning and Envening , is praying always , or , continuing instant in prayer . And truly this is the least you can do if you would be grateful , if you would bring glory to God , if you would be exemplary in your places ; and to do this is good . So the holy Prophet assures us in Psal. 92. which he intituled , A Psalm or Song for the Sabbath-day , vers . 1. It is a good thing to give thanks unto the Lord , and to sing praises unto thy Name , O most High. This is good , there is all good in it , honest , and profitable , and pleasant good ; it is a paying of God what we owe to him , and it will bring over advantage to us , and it carries a great deal of sweetness along with it . But when is it good to do this ? upon a Sabbath-day , the Lord's-day , yes , it is good then , it is very good then , it is then specially in season , because that day is given us not so much for the outward rest of the Body , as for the inward and spiritual refreshing of the Soul , that being taken off and set at liberty from the Labours and Toils of the World , we may be wholly taken up with , and imployed about the Service and Worship of God ; but though this be good , singularly good upon our Sabbath-days , yet it is not good only then , for it is always good at other times as well as then ; so the same Psalmist assures us in the next Verse ; To shew forth thy loving-kindness in the morning , and and thy faithfulness every night . Mark that word , every , every night , and by consequence every morning , day by day ; in the morning , because then the mind is more fresh , and free , and lively , not yet intangled with , nor deprest and fetter'd with secular Affairs , but more fit to wait upon God , and engage to holy works , which call for , and deserve the best and happiest frame . And in the night , the pleasant peace , stilness and silence whereof doth render it very accommodate to , and proper for the most sacred , serious and solemn exercises . In the morning prayer should open the door to business ; give your first visit to God , who is your best Friend , and at Evening let Prayer lock up the door and draw the Curtain . Before the Body lies down in its Bed , let the Soul return unto its Rest. This is a most excellent way for you to enjoy your selves and your God too ; a most excellent way to bring down from Heaven a Blessing upon your Labours in the day , and to put a sweetness and refreshing into your sleep at night . In this way you commit your selves and your all to God , and engage God for you . III. Family-worshipping of God hath been the practice ef Holy men in all Ages . Saints standing upon Record in the Scriptures have sough● and served God in their Families , and with them ; and so have all others in succeeding Generations , who have been sound both in Head and Heart , and acted by right Principles . They have loved the work , and delighted in the performance of it , out of Conscience and Choice . As for those Persons , whose Heads have been Flie-blown , and their mnds corrupted with Errour , they are to be the Objects of our Compassion and Pity ; and the good Lord cause his Light to shine into their Minds in order to their better information , and the reducing them from the Errour of their way ; but their practices are by no means to be made use of as your Directory , or followed as your Pattern . For if any have imbibed false notions , it is no wonder that their lives and actions are crooked and irregular , shamefully deficient in some things , and no less extravagant in others . Let us look to the precious and eminent Saints of God , those that lived and died in the Faith , and obtained a good report . You are commanded to be followers of them who through Faith and Patience have inherited the Promises , who are now possessed of those great things which they before lived in the belief and joyful expectation of , who were here graciously accepted of God , and are now received and glorified by him . Let you and me , my dearly Beloved , follow them , and tread in their steps . Keep the same way now , for it is the way Everlasting , and turn not aside from that , neither to the right hand nor to the left , and equal their pace ; make as much haste as the best of them did , considering that your time is as uncertain as theirs , and it may be shorter ; only walk with circumspection , not blindfold , avoiding those things which were blame-worthy in them , for even they were but Men , and that , imperfect Men , compast about with infirmities , having in them flesh as well as spirit . Imitate them therefore in that which was good in them , and will be so in you , and in nothing else . I may very well apply that of Paul to the present case , and let you and me mind it as our Rule , Phil. 4.8 . Whatsoever things are honest , whatsoever things are just , whatsoever things are pure , whatsoever things are lovely , whatsoever things are of good report , and were so in them , in all , or in any of them , think of those things , and go you and do the like : so long as they wrote fair imitate them , but beware of their blots . I am , and oh that all professing Religion would be for the reviving of the old godliness . Primitive Government in Churches , and Primitive Godliness in Christians are like old Gold , the best ; Ier. 6.16 . Thus saith the Lord , stand there in the ways and see , and ask for the old paths where is the good way , and walk therein , and ye shall find rest to your Souls . The old way is the good way , meddle not with new upstart Doctrines and Practices , that is best which is eldest . Now then come we to the Business before us , upon enquiry we shall find that the setting up of Prayer and other Religious Exercises in the Family was the good old way , that way in which those precious Saints walked here upon Earth , who at last got safely to Heaven , and whose Prayers are changed for Eternal Allelujahs . I will not multiply Instances , but bring three or four out of the Old and New Testaments , and in the Mouth of so many Witnesses I hope you will look upon the thing as evident and established . First ; I Appeal to you , Was not this the way in which this great and excellent Person Joshua walked ? He was a Person that God put great Honour upon , he was the Man that must give Israel Possession of the Land of Promise , and this was his way . He had walked in it , and he was not ashamed to own it before all Israel , both the good and the bad , yea , to declare openly unto them his fixed and immoveable resolution of persevering therein . This is plain in the Text , As for me and my house we will serve the Lord ; not I alone , but I and they too , I with them , whoever was or would be of his House should serve his God , and join with him in Family Duties . Secondly ; Let us look some hundred of years before Joshua , and consider the practice of Abraham , who was called the Friend of God , and the Father of the Faithful . A most remarkable Person , whose Children we shall all of us be willing and glad to be found at the last and great Day , in order to which we are concerned to have and be expressive of his Spirit , and tread in his steps : Now I desire that all of us who are Governours of Families would seriously consider what God saith of him , Gen. 18.19 . The Lord said , shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do ? I know him , that he will command his Children , and his Houshold after him , and they shall keep the way of the Lord. I shall have occasion to make use of this Scripture more than once for several purposes . That which I do at present observe from it is , That there was Government kept up in Abraham 's Family , and that the gracious Principles , by which he was acted , led him thereunto , and that thing was very acceptable and pleasing to God ; God knew that he would do so , and he knew it with a knowledge of approbation . Abraham knew his place , that God had made him Lord and King in his own House , and he would use and exercise that power and aunhority , with which as such he was invested . He would command his Children and his Houshold ; not only wish and desire it , nor only perswade and exhort to it , but command it . Now I think we may from hence without the least suspicion of violence or unfair dealing draw this as a good and necessary Consequence ; That since Abraham did command in his House as a King , he also would teach and instruct them as a Prophet , though there be many in the World who love Domination , that do not care to take the trouble and pains of Instruction ; but doubtless Abraham being so good a Man was none of them : He took care that those who were under his Roof should know the way of the Lord. He would teach them that good way , for it is certain , had there not been due means used for the making of them to know it , it had been a vain and foolish absurd thing in him to command them to keep it . Afterward we find that Moses did first teach , and then charge , Deut. 4.5 , 6. Behold , I have taught you Statutes and Iudgments even as the Lord my God commanded me , that ye should so do in the Land whither ye go to possess it , keep therefore and do them . And I would ask whether we can rationally think that Abraham would command his Children and Houshold to keep the way , and while he was so doing not keep it himself . Our Lord Iesus doth indeed charge the Scribes and Pharisees who sat in Moses Seat , with binding heavy burdens , and grievous to be born ; and laying them on mens shoulders , when they themselves would not move them with one of their fingers : But Abraham without doubt would not only move his Finger and Hand toward this burden of Duty , but also with all his Heart put his Shoulder under it , not counting it grievous , but pleasant and delightful ; and as he instructed them by his teaching , and obliged them by his command , so he would sweetly allure and draw them by his example ; for otherwise we may well think , and he might well fear that his Counsels and Commands , though loving and reasonable would be lost , and not have their desired effect ; for they might in such a case judge they had enough to excuse and warrant their not following his Counsel , and not obeying his Command , because though their Father and Master did order them to do so ▪ yet he would not do it himself . There are indeed Parents will teach their Children sobriety , but are drunk themselves ; command them chastity , but are filthy and unclean themselves , these pull down with one hand what they seem to build with the other . Abraham , I doubt not , would practice what he taught , and tread the way he would have them to go in . Thirdly ; Did not Queen Esther do the same . The Case of the Iews was very sad , Haman being advanced by Aloashuerus , and set above all the Princes , Mordecai knowing him an Amalekite , would not bow unto him , nor do him any reverence ; this Affront put the Man into a rage , and upon the study of Revenge , Mordecai single and alone was too inconsiderable and mean a prey for him to stoop to , therefore he laid a cursed Plot for the destroying all the Iews that were thoroughout the whole Kingdom , and it was very like to take ; an Order was obtained for the destroying , killing and causing to perish all Iews both young and old , little Children and Women in one day , this set them all upon fasting , and weeping , and wailing , and many lay in Sackcloth and Ashes . Mordecai sent to Esther word of this , charging her to go in unto the King , to make Supplication unto him , and to make request before him for her people , threatning her that in case she did altogether hold her peace , enlargement and deliverance should arise unto the Iews from another place , but she and her Fathers House should be destroyed . God would take care of his people , but her timerousness and neglect would issue in her own ruin : Observe now the Answer which hereupon she returned to him , Esther 4.16 . Go gather together all the Jews that are present in Shushan , and fast ye for me , and neither eat nor drink three days , day nor night , I also and my Maidens will fast likewise , and so will I go in to the King , which is not according to the Law , and if I perish I perish . Grotius saith , These were two Maidens that waited upon the Queen , one of them gave her her Hand for a support when she went abroad , and the other held up her Train , and there is no question to be made , but they were either natural Iews or Proselytes , i. e. such as had been brought off from Gentilism and Converted to the Iewish Religion , and she and they fasted together . I and my Maidens will fast , not I alone , but I and they ; and I am very confident , you all will readily grant it was a Religious Fast which they then kept ; they did not only chasten their Bodies ( as David phras'd it ) by abstaining so long from all kinds of Meat and Drink , but they did worship God together , and sought him together , and joined their Hearts and Powers in a mighty wrestling with him for their own Lives , and the Lives of their People which were in such eminent and imminent danger , and which would certainly be cut off , unless God did by some wonderful Providence interpose for the preventing it . But once more . Fourthly ; We have the precious Example of our Lord Iesus Christ , whom we are bound to imitate , as he was in the world so should we be in the world , 1 John 4.17 . and we should run the Race that is set before us looking to Jesus , Heb. 12.1 , 2. not only for encouragement , but likewise for direction . Now he had a Family , his Twelve Disciples were his Family , and he prayed and gave thanks at his Meats , and also at other times , and he prayed not only for them , but with them , Luke 9.16 . As he was alone praying his Disciples were with him . Here is a seeming contradiction , that Christ should be said to be alone , and yet his Disciples with him , but there is no real one for that word , alone must be understood , as intimating no more than the multitudes being departed from him ; when the Miracle of Feeding Five Thousand Men with Five Loaves and Two Fishes had been wrought , they having what they came for , the filling of their Bellies , and satisfying their Curiosity , withdrew themselves and went away , and they being gone he went to Prayer , which was a work he greatly delighted in , and in and at that Prayer his Disciples were with him . I hope it may without vanity be said , That in what I have spoken to you upon this Subject there is enough said for the satisfaction of any sober , serious and consciencious Christian ▪ that the setting and keeping up of the Family-worship of God is the Duty of those that are the Masters or Governours of Families . Wilful Cavillers against plain Truths are not worthy nor fit to be dealt with ; time and pains bestowed upon them is meerly thrown away : Therefore as for those wicked Persons , who are either of Atheistical Principles , not believing , but denying the Being of a God , or of desperately Profane Spirits , that value neither his Love nor his Wrath , and so have no fear of him before their Eyes ; I do not now in these Discourses go about to perswade them , another course must be first taken with them , them I leave to the great and mighty God , begging that he would have Mercy upon them in convincing them that he is , and that he is a Rewarder of them that diligently seek him , and that there is a day coming when the Lord Iesus shall be revealed from Heaven with his mighty Angels , in flaming fire , taking vengeance on them that know not God , and that obey not the Gospel of our Lord Iesus Christ , who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord , and from the glory of his power , 2 Thes. 1.7 , 8 , 9. So we have done with the first thing propounded , viz. That Family-worship is a Duty ; the second part of the work before us is to prove that there is very great and cogent reasons for our performance of this Duty , and that it is ( using the Apostle Paul's expression ) no other than 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , your reasonable service . That which is to be done by rational Creatures , and is most consonant and agreeable to the Principles and Dictates of right Reason ; and I doubt not but this will appear evidently to you , if you will duly consider and weigh the Arguments which we shall draw from these Four Topicks . 1. From God. 2. From Governours of Families . 3. From the Families themselves . 4. From the Publick . You will find that there do Obligations rise from all these , many and strong ones for the enaging and binding you hereunto ; the good Lord grant we may study the Obligations , and answer them by a suitable practice . First ; You are to set up Religious Worship in your Families upon the account of the most great and glorious God , who alone is the proper Object of it , unto whom it is to be performed . And here are three things which did immediately occur to my thoughts , and which I do now offer to your Consideration . I. God is the Author and Original of our Families : They had their Being from God , and therefore they should pay Homage , and perform Service unto him ; this is that which doth without all Controversie lay an Everlasting Engagement upon particular Persons , high and low , young and old to serve God , to love him with all their Hearts , to fear him all the day , and to worship him , because he made them . Children are to honour their Father , and Mother , but God much more ; because God was the principal efficient of their Being , their Earthly Parents no more than Instruments in his Hand . And if it be a good way of arguing in David , and so in us , to say as he did , Psal. 119.94 . I am thine , save me ; and verse 73. Thy hands have made me , and fashion'd me , give me understanding . It cannot but be as strong , and if we be ingenuous , as forcible and taking an Argument on God's side , for him to say to us , You are mine , you were wonderfully made , formed and fashioned by my wisdom , and the hand of my power , therefore do you serve me . It is full out as good an Argument for Duty , as it can be a plea for Mercy ; do not the Rivers send back their Waters to the Sea from which they received them ? And shall not Man return praise and service to God from whom he received life and strength , all that he is , and hath ? I desire you to take notice what a loud and earnest call there is , and how much importunity the Prophet useth in Psal. 100. 1 , 2. Make a joyful noise unto the Lord , all ye Lands . Be joyful , be chearful , it is lawful for you to be so , it is allowed you to be so , and if you be gracious , of all persons in the World , you have the greatest right to Joy , only see that your Joy be directed to God , and terminated in God. Make a joyful noise unto the Lord. Well , he goeth on , vers . 2. Serve the Lord with gladness , come before his presence with singing . Do not go to his work as Bears to a Stake , nor meerly as to a Task , but as to your Recreation , as to your Meat and Drink , so Christ did ; be sure that your duty be your delight . And yet again he adds , Enter into his Gates with thanksgiving , and into his Courts with praise ; be thankful unto him and bless his Name . We should labour to have our hearts greatly raised and enlarged in our serving of God ; that we have such a God , so glorious , so good , and that he is pleased to admit us into his Service , and employ us about it . But why all this ? what reason is there for it ? doth any one here ask that Question ? let him know , yea and let all men know . So saith the Prophet , in verse 3. Know ye that the Lord He is God. He alone is God. Let others be what they will , never so great , and high , and good , there is not a God among them . Iehovah is God ; of whom , and thro whom , and for whom are all things . It is He that hath made us , and not we our selves . The Hebrew reads it in the Margin , His we are . And Mr. Ainsworth tells us the Chaldee keeps that reading . It is He that hath made us , and his we are . He hath the best Title to us , the Supream Soveraign Right ; We are his People , and the Sheep of his Pasture . And since we are his Creatures , we should be his Servants ; we should delight to do his work , because He gave us Being . Now if there be so much reason in God's making them , why every individual , every particular single Person should serve and worship God , why they should thus come before him with praises and thanksgivings , there is as great reason why Families should do so too , nay there is the very same reason . For God made Families too , Families have their Being from God. Nay , there is a double reason , for he hath put forth a double act of Mercy and Power : He did both make the Persons and the Family , Psal. 68.4.5 . Sing unto God , sing praises to his Name , extol him that rideth upon the Heavens , by his Name IAH , and rejoyce before him . One well observes , that our thoughts of God should not be low and mean , but high and heavenly , lifting up his Name above the most excellent and glorious Creatures , because they all are his Servants , and he makes use of them as he pleaseth , riding upon the Heavens as his Chariot , and because he only hath Being of himself , and gives Being to all those things that are . But what other reason is to be given for this , read on , A Father of the Fatherless , and a Iudge of the Widdow is God in his holy Habitation . So then , he is a God of Bowels , his Compassions work and fail not ; he is a good Friend to the Poor and Helpless , Orphans and Widdows , whose Tears , and the Cries of whose Necessities sometimes , and among some persons , can hardly obtain the consideration of their case ; but God will be a careful Father of the Fatherless , and a righteous Judge for the Widdow . But what is this to the present purpose ? though it be not , yet I was willing to take notice of it as that which may be comfortable to some ; and now look into the next Verse , and we shall meet with something apposite to our case . Sing unto God , and extol him that rideth upon the Heavens , by his Name IAH . But why so ? God setteth the solitary in Families . He sets them in an House , those that were destitute ; so some render it , poor ▪ wretched , destitute , were not worth a foot of Land , had not where to lay their head ; he provides a place for them , and an Habitation ; others read it , those that were solitary , and so do our Translators , such as are all Solitary , single Persons , and all alone , and upon that account lead a melancholick and uncomfortable life ; God sets them in Families ; they were once poor Servants in other mens Families , where they were fain to labour and toil , and some of them were beaten unmercifully , and pinched in their Dyet , but since God hath been graciously pleased to raise them , and to give them Families of their own ; they have now Yoke-fellows to delight in , and Children to rejoyce in , and Servants to work for them , and wait upon them . Nay , it is God that doth not only set in Families , but doth for many multiply and magnifie them ; they have numerous Families , and plenty for them . Those that had but a small matter to begin with , are now arrived at a very considerable Estate , and have not only wherewith to answer their necessities , and to silence the lamentable , bitter , heart-piercing Cries of hungry craving Children , but enough and to spare , and therefore these should worship at his footstool , and both speak and live his praise ; Psal. 107. The Prophet doth in a pang and rapture , as it were , for several times one after another , break out in this holy wish ; Oh that men would praise the Lord ! Oh that men would praise the Lord ! Oh that men would praise the Lord ! vers . 8.15 , 21 , 31. But what is the matter ? What , do you enquire ? and would you indeed know ? There is matter enough , abundant matter ; they that have hearts devoted to the praising of God , will never want matter of praise . The Prophet in those Verses wisheth that men would praise him for his goodness , and for his wonderful works to the Children of men . His works are so wonderful , that they call for admirings , and there is such a goodness in them that they deserve praises . And the Children of Men are greatly obliged to abound in these praises , because they are no less concerned and interested in these works , they being done to and for them . But this is only spoken in general , particulars are more affecting ; and if any one here hath not taken notice of many , he hath been very heedless and unworthy . But the Prophet doth multiply particulars in that Psalm , as he will find that peruseth it . I shall take only one out of the heap , as serving our occasion , vers . 41. He setteth the poor on high from , or , after affliction , and maketh him Families like a Flock . The Man was poor before , exceeding poor , possibly not worth a Groat , yea and he was in affliction too ; though Poverty is it self a sore affliction , there needs no other , yet it doth not go alone ; the poor Man is slighted by his Friends , and trampled upon by his Neighbours , and it is likely , afraid to stir out of his own door , lest a Serjeant should clap an Arrest upon his back ; but now after this affliction God raiseth him up , and sets him on high : He is now grown a considerable Person , a Man of Estate , a Gentleman in the Countrey , an Alderman in the City ; it is well , if he be humble now he is high , and doth not forget himself , and that God too , who advanced him , and hath given him a Family like a Flock ; and as a considerable Flock , so a rich Pasture for him and it to feed in ; there you see , Families are of God's making . Hast thou , O Woman ! a careful Husband that minds his business and provides well ? thou hadst him from God. Hast thou , O Man ! a prudent Wife that orders well ? it was God laid her out for thee . Have you both Children that are the Crown of your Conjugal Relation , it was God that bestowed them upon you , they all are his Off-spring . When Iacob was upon his Journey towards the Land of his Kindred , Esau went out to meet him , and God having conquer'd and influenced his Spirit , he embraced him and fell upon his Neck and kissed him ; and seeing the Women and the Children , he said , Who are those with thee ? Gen. 33.5 . Iacob answered , The Children which God hath graciously given thy Servant . Children are God's gift , and they are a gracious gift , which carrieth in it a great deal of goodness and mercy . That is the first thing , God is the Author of Families , and since they had their Being from him , it is fit he should have service and worship from them so long as they have a Being . II. My second Reason shall be drawn from that Honour which we all should bring to God. He that is the most excellent and glorious Being may challenge , for he doth deserve glory at the hands of all his Creatures . And they have wickedly forfeited their Being , who do not make their contributions , and cast in something , nay all they can into the Treasury of his Glory . Here I shall more briefly touch upon these few things , but do you ponder them . First ; The Glory of God was the end he aimed at in all that he makes and doth , Prov. 16.4 . The Lord hath made all things for himself : And well he might , for there is none higher than himself , none better . He made all for himself , as Heaven , for that is his Throne , so Earth , for that is his Footstool . And as other Creatures , so intelligent rational Creatures , as Angels , so Men , and as Persons , so Families ; all of them for himself , all for his glory ; and is there not reason that they whom God hath made should mind and pursue that which they were made for ? Those that do not live to that purpose , do not live to good purpose ; and if they do not live to that end for which God made them , will at last miss of that Reward which they are now so forward to promise themselves . Secondly ; Other Creatures do in their kind honour God ; not only the irrational Creatures , but also the inanimate ones ; the Heavens and the Firmament ; Psal. 19.1 . The Heavens declare the glory of God , and the Firmament sheweth his handy-work . So do the Day and the Night ; vers . 2. Day unto day uttereth speech , and night unto night sheweth knowledge ; yea , and they go up and down doing it ; they compass Sea and Land doing it ; vers . 3 , 4. There is no Speech nor Language , where their Voice is not heard ; their Line is gone out through all the Earth , and their Words to the end of the World. And it would certainly be a shame and reproach to us if any of our Families should be mute and silent , and bring him no glory . Thirdly ; God doth expect glory from us . This is the Tribute he looks should be paid him by us ; Mal. 1.6 . A Son honoureth his Father , and a Servant his Master ; if I then be a Father , where is my honour ? and if I be a Master , where is my fear ? saith the Lord of Hosts . God hath been graciously pleased to put himself into all endearing Relations to his People . There you read of his being both a Father and a Master ; and those that desire to be his Children , must resolve to be his Servants ; and in order to an happy enjoyment of the Priviledges , there must be a cordial and chearful performance of the duties . We must honour him as a Father , and fear him as a Master . Now the fear of God doth contain in it , as that inward filial and holy affection of the Soul , so the outward Worship of God ; and they that do not so fear him , do not honour him : Nay , let your Profession be never so great , and your pretences to Religion never so high , your not having his Worship in your Families is no other than so far a practical disowning and renouncing him . Fourthly ; The Honour of God is to be dearer to us than our own Interest . This should be laid at the foot of that . Iohn the Baptist was most freely willing to decrease , so that Christ might increase ; to dwindle away , and vanish into a worthless inconsiderable nothing , so that Christ might be exalted in the hearts of Men ; and it should be so with us , and with all upon whom his Name is called . The design of honouring God , and lifting up of his Name , should be uppermost , and run through our whole course , and be the main principal scope of all our Actions , as is evident from that Scripture Precept , 1 Cor. 10.31 . Whether ye eat or drink , or whatever ye do , do all to the glory of God. As all our Affections should meet in God as the only Center , so all our Actions should be directed to his glory as the supream ▪ ultimate and most noble end : But are they obedient to this Command , do they walk according to this excellent Rule , who do not set up the Worship of God in their Families ? no , they are far from it , they live in a direct contrariety . Instead of doing all to the glory of God , in their Families they do nothing ; they mind their own things , but mind not , regard not the things of God and Iesus Christ ; they do neither seek after God , nor live unto him ; and what is this but vile ingratitude , and most sordid baseness ? what is it but brutish selfishness ? When men are confin'd to , and wrapt up in themselves , do not look above nor beyond themselves ; they eat and drink , they wake and sleep for themselves , they dress and deck , and finifie themselves ; they labour , and toil , and trade for themselves ; they scrape , and hoard , and lay up for themselves , and in this they are unwearied and unsatisfied , never think they are fine enough , nor rich enough , nor great enough ; but all this while the great God is most shamefully forgotten and neglected , he is not in their thoughts , nor in their designs . Fifthly ; The Glory of God is to be sought and promoted by us to our utmost . Our best is his due ; therefore he calls for the Heart , the whole of it , and for the Male of the Flock . Our All is his due ; we have it from him , and we owe it to him ; Deut. 6.5 . Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy Heart , and with all thy Soul , and with all thy Might . Where you have the Object of your Love , the most proper and principal Object of it , God , and the Reasons , why we should love him , the one is his own Nature , because He is the Lord , Iehovah , who hath his Being of himself , gives Being to all things that are , and accomplishment to his Word and Promises ; the other is his Relation to us , or our Interest in him ; He is thy God , thine in a Covenant of Grace . Again , there you have the Manner of your Love , or the Degree of it , how high it must reach , how far extend , to all , all thy Heart ; to which the Scripture ascribes Understanding , Wisdom and Faith ; all thy Soul , which is the seat of the Will and Affections , and with all thy Might ; love him as well as we can , blow up our Love to God unto the hottest and most vehement flame . Love him with all your ability . Let your Love to God go as far as your Authority reacheth , and the Power of your Hand , and there let your Love express it self . Honour him in your House , and with your Substance . By all these things it doth evidently appear , the Glory of God should be exceeding dear to us , and industriously served and promoted by us . Now I will appeal to you in the case , who are Heads of Houses , and ask this one Question , What better way can you take ? What course can you think of that will be more proper and probably successful for the advancing of the Honour of God , than the setting up of his Worship and Religious Exercises in your Families ? What can you do more toward it ? what better ? What is there within the compass of your Power that hath a fairer , a more promising aspect and tendency to this great & noble End ? How can you better serve the Interest of God and Godliness ? And I do earnestly desire you to spend now and then a little time in thinking seriously with your selves , what sad , wretched , miserable Families those are , in which there is a great many Creature-comforts , Epicurean Provisions for the Table and the Belly ; there is eating and drinking to excess , if not to drunkenness ; there is Cards and Dice , Chambering and Wantonness ; a great deal of Mirth and Jollity , Vanity and Folly ; but there is no Praying there , no Reading of the Scriptures ; there is great dressing of Meat , and decking of the Body , but in the midst of all this there is no duty done to God , no Honour brought him , no care taken for precious and immortal Souls . I do pity them , and oh that my Soul might weep ▪ in secret for their sinful neglect ! And I do earnestly desire them to remember and lay to heart , that which God hath spoken , and will certainly stand to . He will make that word of his good , to the comfort of his People , and confusion of his Enemies , 1 Sam. 2.30 . Them that honour me , I will honour , but they that despise me shall be lightly esteemed . From whence it is plain , that God takes special notice of Persons , their Spirits and Actions , and as they carry toward him , so will he to them . That Tree may expect to fall under a blasting withering Curse , from which the Lord Iesus doth gather no Fruit. III. My third and last Reason shall be drawn from the equity of the thing : Family-worship is God's due , as you heard before , the Prophet said , Who would not fear thee , O King of Nations , for to thee it doth appertain ; it doth of right belong to him ; Man cannot lay claim to any Comfort or Blessing as due to him from God for any thing that he hath done , for all is Mercy , than the least of which Man is less , yea , the best of Men , but God may lay claim to fear , and honour , and service , as due to him from Man , and I may say the same in the present case ; what Family is there that should not serve and worship thee , O thou King of Nations , O thou King of Saints , for to thee it doth appertain . It is too true , and a sad truth it is , that too many Families in England , yea , and in London do not do it , and I am afraid when all is said that can be said , will not worship God , they are setled upon their Lees , but what Family is there that should not do it . There is none , not the greatest , not the poorest , not those that have most leisure , not those that have most business , not those that live in the greatest fulness and splendor , nor those that are forced to earn their Bread with their hard labour , and in the sweat of their Brows . The more any have , the more abundant they should be in praises , and the more any want , the more frequent and fervent they should be in prayers ; whatever their case and condition is , still they do owe this to God. I may very well call it and House-●ent , which they are bound to be continually paying to their great Landlord , and for a neglect or default therein he may justly turn them out of Doors , cast them into the open Street , yea , bring them to a Dunghil and Morsel of Bread. I am not censorious , nor do I charge any one , but this is apparent , many that have been topping Men , yea , and made a great Profession , have come to nothing , to a Goal , the Mint , the White-friers , they have broken scandalously , and by that means have made Religion to stink in the Nostrils of those who are no Friends to it ; and I would advise them to reflect upon time past , and consider whether they were not wanting to , or remiss in Family-duties , and if they were , let them humble themselves and justifie God , and say , Righteous art thou , O Lord ; why should they think that God would bless and prosper them , to the enabling them to pay their Debts to Men , if they do not make any Conscience of paying that Tribute which they owe to him ? but that is only a serious and seasonable hint by the way . I am to shew you that Family-worship is due to God , and it is so upon these accounts . First ; Vpon the account of their Being . I before proved that they are of God ; he made you and them too : Now the Prophet saith , Psal. 145.10 . All thy works shall praise thee , O Lord ; our Families are his work , and therefore they should praise him . Secondly ; Family worship ought to be conscienciously and constantly performed to God upon the account of those Mercies which they do receive from God. We have personal Mercies , preservation and supply , health and strength , food and raiment , and these do engage us to personal services . Iacob thought so when Gen. 28.20 , 21 , 22. He vowed a vow , saying , If God will be with me , and will keep me in the way that I go , and will give me bread to eat , and raiment to put on , so that I come again to my fathers house in peace , the Lord shall be my God , and this stone which I have set for a pillar shall be God's house ; and he accordingly did afterward there Build an Altar , which was for the Service and Worship of God. Now by a parity of Reason Family-mercies do oblige unto Family-worship . Alas ! what miserable Houses would ours be if God should not look after them , and befriend them ; how would they be exposed should he withdraw his protection , and not cover them with his Wing ? How would they be straitned and pinched did not he reach out to them his Hand of Bounty , they soon would turn into Houses of Mourning , and Places of Confusion ; it is God that by his shining upon our Tabernacles makes them comfortable and pleasant to us , and doth commend and sweeten our Communion together , so that we lye down , and rise up , and live in peace , therefore it is fit and highly becoming that we should serve and worship him together . Those that are drawn with the same Cords of Kindness should draw in the same Yoke of Obedience . Methinks the Father should of his own accord , without a Monitor , say to his Family as in Psal. 34.3 . O magnifie the Lord with me , and let us exalt his name together . Thirdly ; Family-worship is due to God upon the account of his continuing and repeating his Mercies to our Families . How much doth he do for them ? And how unwearied is he in doing ? We deserve nothing , we have forfeited all , yet his compassion doth not fail , nor is the Stream of Mercy cut off : Must you not say , have ye not reason to say , he daily loads you with his Benefits , and he causeth Mercy and Goodness to follow you ? It is his Mercy that maketh us dwell in safety , and sets an Hedge about us and our Houses , and about all that we have on every side , else we should become a prey to the Sons of Violence , or fuel to the greedy devouring Flames . It is he that continueth the peace of our Families , else a perverse froward Spirit would be conjur'd up in one or other , and give a disturbance to the whole : How great a matter may a little Fire kindle ? It is he that gives you the Comforts of your Families , spreads your Tables , and fills your Cups , and giveth you all things to enjoy , 1 Tim. 6.17 . Your Cisterns would quickly be empty , had they not recruits from the Eternal Fountain . It is he that prevents breaches in your Families , sinful breaches through anger and discontent , jarrs and fallings out , so that you would be Wolves and Tygers one to another ; afflictive breaches , that would be Heart-breakings and cloath you in Sables , and fetch Rivers of Tears from your Eyes , and such a Groan as was utter'd by Naomi , Ruth 1.21 , 22. Call me Marah , for the Lord hath dealt bitterly with me ; I was full , and the Lord hath made me empty . How easily else might Death come with his Dart and stab one , and with his Sythe mow down another , so that the Parents shall sit down lamenting , and refuse to be comforted , and a numerous Family moulder away into nothing . It hath been thus in other Houses , why is it not so in yours ? But because of God's sparing Mercy he hath not given Death a Commission : To instance in all that God doth for us , to give in the total Sum of his favours is beyond our power , we have reason to say with holy David , Psal. 139.17 , 18. How precious are thy thoughts unto me , O God , how great is the sum of them ? if I should count them , they are more in number than the sand ; when I awake , I am still with thee . Under thy careful watchful Eye , thy securing comforting Wing , and surely all this doth greatly oblige Families to own , serve and honour God ; the Bonds of God are upon us , there is the Bond of his Law , the Bond of his Covenant , and the Bond of Kindness ; let us not break these Bonds , lest he bind us in the Bonds of Affliction , and Fetters of Wrath : As it would be a burning shame , so an high provocation , if they who receive so much from God , should return little or nothing to him . Fourthly ; Family-worship is due to God , because of that necessary and absolute dependance which they have upon him for the future . He that gave particular Persons their Being , doth continue them in being , else they would drop into the Grave . Thou holdest our soul in life , and sufferest not our feet to be moved , Psal. 66.9 . God by his Word created the World , and the like Word of his Power is required for its preservation , else it would return to its ancient Chaos , Heb. 1.3 . He upholdeth all things by the Word of his Power ; so he that made our Families must maintain them , he that raised them up must keep them up ; how soon would they sink if his Everlasting Arm were not underneath ! In the Church , he that planteth is nothing , and he that watereth is nothing , but God that giveth the increase ; so in the House , he that ordereth and commandeth is nothing , and they that assist and labour are nothing , but God that giveth the blessing and the success . I desire you to bestow some thoughts upon that one Scripture , Iob 8.6 . He shall make the habitation of thy righteousness prosperous ; where I desire you to take notice of these few things . First ; That it is God's work to make Habitations prosperous ; yea , it is his alone ; all endeavours are vain and fruitless without his concurrence . The diligent Hand indeed is said to make rich , but another place tells us , the Blessing of the Lord makes rich . Man's diligence and God's blessing do excellently together , then much good will come of it ; but when Man works alone , he doth but beat the Air , and loseth his labour , nothing will prosper , that God doth not command so to do ; in Spirituals , the Spices will not flow forth unless the North and South Wind blow upon the Garden : In Temporals , the Ship must lye still and not reach its desired Haven , except the Divine Blessing fill the Sails . God's Curse at the Root will blast Families , and make the greatest and most flourishing of them fade and dwindle into nothing . Secondly ; Our Reason will tell us , and so doth that Scripture , That righteous Families stand fairest for God's Blessing ; I will behave my self wisely in a perfect way , said David , I will walk within my house with a perfect heart , O when wilt thou come to me ! Psal. 101. A person of such an Heart and Way may desire and wish for God , humbly invite him , and believingly expect him with smiles and sweet manifestations of himself , and gracious favourable Providences . It is most probable and most rational to conclude that God will prosper Habitations of Righteousness ; this looks most consonant to his Nature ▪ most agreeable to his Justice , and for this there is the greatest assurance in his Promises . It is a righteous thing with God that Habitations of Wickedness should be Instances of Divine Vengeance , that Habitations of Uncleanness should be Habitations for Owls and Satyrs , that where the Tables are full of Vomit , the Houses should spew them out ; but righteous Persons and Habitations of Righteousness are under the Blessing of Heaven , and so most like to flourish , Psal. 5.12 . Thou , Lord , wilt bless the righteous , with favour wilt thou compass him as with a shield . But then , Thirdly ; The great Question will be , What it is that doth make or denominate any House an Habitation of Righteousness ; and to that I answer , the giving of every one his due ; the performing all righteous acts toward Men , and of all holy acts toward God , that is an Habitation of Righteousness in which there is the true fear and worship of God. There may be a righteous Person in a Family that is wicked , there was a righteous Noah in a wicked World , a just Lot in a wicked Sodom , a Diamond in a sink , a good Ahijah in the House of Iereboam who made Israel to sin , Saints in the House of Nero , who was at that day the Monster of Men , though there have been as bad since , and worse too , but this did not make those Houses Habitations of Righteousness , notwithstanding that they were Habitations of Devils ; there must be the Families fearing , serving , and worshipping of God , else it is not , it cannot truly be called an Habitation of Righteousness : So much may well suffice to be spoken to the first sett of Arguments for the proving to you , that the setting up of the Worship of God in our Families is no more than our reasonable service . I proceed now , according to the method before propounded , to a second order or company of Arguments for the setting up of Family-worship and Duty , and they shall be drawn from the Heads and Governours of Families , and there will be several of them , which I advise and earnestly desire every one of you seriously to consider ; for what will Arguments signifie , if they be not duly weighed ? Prov. 24.32 . Solomon tells us , that passing by the Field and Vineyard of the slothful Man void of understanding , the Wall whereof was broken down , and it was overgrown with Thorns , and Nettles cover'd the face thereof ; He saw it , and more than so , he looked upon it , wistly , curiously , again and again , and he consider'd it , he laid it to his Heart , and he consider'd it well , and thereupon he received instruction ; Oh that you would do the like as to those things which you do find in the Scriptures , and in the holy Discourses of your Faithful Ministers against sin , and for duty , and in particular for Family-duty , consider them well , that so you may receive instruction : And the good Lord , without whom we poor Worms can do nothing , grant that what hath been , and shall be said to this purpose may be accompanied with his holy Spirit , and so come with such a power upon your Souls , as that his glory may be a gainer , and his worship may be carefully and constantly performed for the future in those Families , ( if there be any such in this numerous Congregation ) in which hitherto it hath been shamefully neglected . I. You that are Governours of Families , Masters or Mistresses , are charged with them . Your Families are your Charge , God hath committed them to your Care and Government ; as they are to act for you , so you are to care for them . Kings have a great power , and that maketh some of them Oppressive and Tyrannical . They have great Honour , and that makes them Proud and Lofty ; but all of them have a great Trust , the whole Kingdom is committed to them ; and they should not only indeavour to secure their own Prerogative , but also publick good , the peace , welfare and prosperity of their people ; this they are all of them bound to do , and those that do it are great Blessings . Ministers also have a great Charge ; as it is an honourable , so it is a weighty thing to be a Minister of Jesus Christ , for the Churches of which they be Pastors are committed to them ; they are to look to the Flock of God , over which the Holy Ghost hath made them Overseers , and they are to watch for the Peoples Souls , that they may feed them with understanding and sound knowledge , and also preserve them from those that lye in wait to deceive , and from every path of the destroyer ; and O that while we do all , with the Apostle Paul , Magnifie our Office ; we may all be careful to fulfil our Ministry , and do the work of our Office ! And so , that I may return to the business before us , Masters and Mistresses of Families have no small Charge , no little Trust , for their Families are committed to them ; the Family is a Body , bigger or less , and the Master is the Head of it , and he should rule , order and influence all the Members thereof ; they have both a power and a trust , a power , and so set over them ; a trust , and so charged with them ; and as they would not be deprived of their power , so they ought not to betray their trust ; you that are Rulers of Families will be known in your places , it is fit you should be so . I pray be good in your places ; and as you will maintain your Authority , and make use of your power , be true to your trust too ; some of you will say in some cases that you will not abate an Ace , stand as much upon it , and be as exact here ; you will be Kings in your own Houses , you ought to be so , God hath made you so , but be Prophets and Priests also , in such a manner take , and keep , and use the Iurisdiction , as that labouring in Prayer , in the Word and Doctrine , may not slip through your Fingers . As Magistrates , so Ministers , and Parents , and Masters ought to rule in the fear of God. For you are to remember that you are intrusted with the Souls of your Families , as well as with their Bodies ; and you ought to seek and endeavour the good of their Souls as well as the good of their Bodies ; I mean , both of their Children , and of their Servants , yea , and more too , because the Soul is best , and the welfare and comfort of the Body depends upon the happiness of the Soul. Indeed the Soul may be in a thriving condition Godward , but the Body crazy and wasting ; the Soul may be of an healthful Constitution , but the Body sickly and weak , as is clear from that of Paul , 2 Cor. 4.16 . Though the outward man perish , yet the inward man is renewed day by day ; and that this was the case of Gaius , I am very apt to conclude from that kind and friendly wish of Iohn in his third Epistle , I wish that thy body may prosper and be in health , even as thy soul prospereth . But if the Soul be void of Knowledge and Grace , if there be not a saving Light in the Head , nor the Law of God in the Heart , the Body will come to lye down at last in misery and sorrow ; cocker and pamper it never so much , care and cark for it as you will , the issue will at last be dreadful , the compositum , i e. the whole Man will come to ruin , Hos. 4.6 . My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge , not only deformed as a Person is for want of an Eye , but destroyed , cut off , utterly ruined and undone ; and ought not the greatest care be taken for the prevention of that ? We read in 1 Tim. 5.6 . If any man provide not for his own , specially for those of his own house , he hath denied the faith , and is worse than an infidel . Though he doth not deny the Faith in words , yet he doth in deeds ; he hath practically renounced Christianity by his not living up to the Laws and Rules thereof ; and he is worse than an Infidel by his falling short of them . He is defective and wanting in that which they perform , though he lives in a Valley of Vision , though he sits under the bright and glorious Beams of the Sun of Righteousness display'd in the Everlasting Gospel , yet he is outdone by the very Heathen , who have no more than the dark glimmering Light of Nature , which is like a Candle burnt down to the Socket ; so that it is the Duty of all Parents and Masters to provide for their own Houses . But here the Question will be , What are they to provide ? What ? All that is convenient for them ; according to that Prayer of Holy and Wise Agur , in Prov. 30.8 . feed me with food convenient for me . To be sure they must provide things necessary , if it be in their power , but necessary for what ? only for the Body ? Meat , and Drink , and Cloaths , and Lodging , Mony , and Wages ? are these all the things that are necessary and convenient for them ? is this the supplying of all their need ? is this all that the Lord requires and expects at their hands ? surely no , it is true , this is a part of their duty , but it is the least , and lowest part ; this he provides for the Brute , but not for the Man ; for the Cabinet , but not for the Jewel ; they should so provide for them , as that it may be well with them every way , to all intents and purposes ; their Families have precious Souls , as well as comely Bodies , craving Souls as well as hungry Bodies , and they should so provide for their Souls , as that it may not be their fault if it be not well with their Souls , and that both in time , and to Eternity . in the 2 d of Peter ▪ 1 , 2 ver . the Apostle Peter speaking of God , saith , His Divine Power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto Life , and Godliness . O let us learn to admire and endear this God who is so gracious and liberal unto us ! now let us be followers of him as dear Children ; this is an excellent Copy for us to write after who are House holders ; let us provide for ours , all that is necessary for this their Temporal Life , yea , and all that is necessary for Godliness . But now , can any one tell how they provide for the Souls of their Families , which are under their Government , and committed to their care , who do not set up the Worship of God in their Families ? who do nothing towards their instruction and sanctification , nothing towards the making of them understanding , gracious , and holy ? Are those Families well provided for in which there is no serving of God , no religious exercises , no Praying , no Catechising , nor reading of the Scriptures , no Repeating of Sermons , no Singing of Psalms , no holy Discourses about God , and Jesus Christ , and the things of God ; no Holy Instructions , nor good Councils , nor provoking one another to love and good works ? we shall indeed sometimes hear people say of such or such a Man , O , he is a Man of a generous Spirit , a brave House-keeper ; but ask them wherein , how doth that appear ? the Answer is , by his keeping a good Table , a great Table , he buyeth the best Meat the Market doth afford , and a great deal of it , so that the Servants have enough , and to spare , and you may see many poor lying at his door , who are relieved there ; and this is indeed good and commendable , and it is to be desired , that all whose Estates will reach it were such , they would be no losers by it ; it is one way to bring down a blessing upon their Callings , and the works of their hands ; but give me leave to tell that Man , if this be all , if he stop here , and his brave House-keeping amount to no more than this , in a word , if he doth not set up the Worship of God in his Family , he is a pitiful , a miserable House-keeper , his House is the way to Hell ; though he keeps a Great Table , yet he keeps a wicked House , a godless , graceless House , he fills Bodies , and starves Souls , his Dogs have as much reason to commend him , as his Wife , and Children , and Servants . Well , that is the first thing ; and oh that it may abide with you who are Governours of Families ; sit down and think seriously upon it , that your Families are your charge , you are charged with the Souls of your Families , God hath put them into your hand , and committed them to your care , and therefore you are obliged to look after them ; and as God hath given them to you , so it is your duty to train and bring them up for God : But this will meet us again in the way of this Discourse , and then I shall speak something more to it . II. You are accountable for your Families ▪ as charged with them , so responsible for them . We read in the 25th of Matthew , 14 , &c. of a Man Travelling into a far Country , who called unto him his Servants , and delivered unto them his goods , to one five Talents , to another two , and to a third but one ; after a time he returned , and reckoned with them . God hath committed to every one of us some Talents , to some more , to some fewer , and he will reckon with us all for them , and enquire what we have done with them ; one hath a Talent of Parts , another of Power , another of Interest , a fourth of Riches ; do not you let them lie dead upon your hands , but be good Husbands , Trade with them , my Friends , trade with them for God , and know as God will reckon with you for your Talents , so for Persons that are committed to your Charge ; and as God said to Cain , Gen. 4.9 . Where is Abel thy Brother ? so he will say to thee , where is thy Wife , where thy Son , where thy Daughter , where is thy Man Servant , where thy Maid ? Masters of Families are accountable both for the Bodies and the Souls under their roofs . First , they are accountable for the bodies that are in their Families ; you know they are so , not only to God , but likewise to the Magistrate , and to the Law. So that if any of them doth miscarry , and dies a violent death , there is a very strict search made into it , the Coroners Inquest sits upon the body , all suspected Persons are called and examined , and the great Question is , How did this Person come by his death ? though it be the meanest Servant in the House , the Scullion , or Kitchin-Boy , yet it is not past by , nor is it fit it should : No Murtherer ought to be Pardoned , that is a standing Law which binds in all Ages , and Places , Gen. 9.6 . who so sheddeth Mans blood , by Man shall his blood be shed ; let the man destroyed have been never so poor , and mean , and despicable for his outward Condition , and let the Murtherer be what he will , tho' a person of never so great Quality , as they Phrase it , yet he must die for it . God hath said , by Man shall his blood be shed . If the Master himself was the cause of his Servants death , he shall answer for it , and life shall go for life , blood , for blood ; if he Poisoned the meanest Servant he had , or if he starved him , it must be so ; and that Scripture tells you the reason of the thing lieth in this , because Man was made in the Image of God ; and there was afterward another Law made , Numb . 35.31 . Ye shall take no satisfaction for the life of a Murtherer , which is guilty of death , but he shall be surely put to death ; so that as the Iewish Doctors say , though he could give all the Riches of the World , and the Avenger of Blood were perswaded into a willingness to pass it by , yet it could not be done . Let Magistrates therefore consider what they do , when they Pardon Murtherers , whom God himself hath devoted to destruction . But Secondly , they are accountable for the Souls that are in their Families ; for God doth highly value the Souls which he hath Created , and as carefully and curiously looks after Souls , as his Law enjoyns and requires Men in place of Power and Authority to look after the Bodies of Men , and to judge and avenge their blood , when it hath been shed by wicked and cruel hands , and when they do miscarry , as too many do , thousands , myriads , millions do , he will make inquisition for their blood , and see how it came to pass ; and if their Parents , or Masters be guilty of it , he will require it at their hands ; and there are too many that will be one day found with their hands full of blood ; there are some Men among us , that do corrupt and taint the Judgments of their Children , and Servants , and Poyson their Minds with their Cursed Doctrines , and Damnable Heresies , ( I ask no pardon for that expression , as too harsh and severe , for it is Scripture Language ) and by their sinful practices , and vile debaucheries , which are as bad as Rats-bane , and they shall be sure to answer for it . Others there are that do starve their Souls by not teaching them the way and fear of the Lord , not instilling good Principles into them , by not setting holy Examples before them , which they should imitate ; not taking them by the hand , and leading them in the ways of Righteousness , the midst of those Paths of Judgments in which they ought to go ; by living themselves like so many Heathens , and Brutes , and teaching others to do the same , bringing them up for Hell , and fitting them for destruction ; as if they had taken up a resolution that they would not serve the Lord , nor go to Heaven , no , nor any that belong to them , if they can prevent it ; and these Men likewise shall answer it to God. Such shall be dealt with in the same manner as God threatned he would do with the Prophet , in case of his being false to his trust , and unfaithful to those unto whom he was sent . You may see it in Ezek. 3.17 , 18 ▪ Son of Man , I have made thee a Watchman to the house of Israel , therefore hear the word at my mouth , and give them warning from me . People are in eminent danger of being seduced by False Teachers , of being prevailed against by Temptations of Satan , and his instruments ; Ministers must watch over them , they must go themselves to God for light , teaching instruction , and be faithful in teaching , when taught , and in giving out what they have received . Now mark , when I say unto the Wicked , thou shalt surely die , and thou givest him not warning , nor speakest to warn the wicked from his evil way to save his life , the same wicked man shall die in his iniquity , but his blood will I require at thy hands ; which , saith Erasmus , is fulmen non verbum , not a word but a Thunder-bolt . Duty is safe , as long as that is done by Ministers , they are out of danger , out of harms way , they shall be accepted and rewarded by God , whatever the issue be as to the people among whom they labour , Isa. 49.5 . Though Israel be not gathered , yet shall I be glorius in the eyes of the Lord , and my God shall be my strength ; but neglect and carelesness is damnable , it brings upon Ministers the guilt of other mens blood , and the loss of their own Lives and Souls ; and believe it , so it will upon you who are Parents , and Masters of Families . Oh , consider it , my dear Friends , Beloved and longed for , seriously consider it , you are , as I formerly said , and without doubt you your selves know , Prophets in your own Houses , there you are to Teach and Rule . God hath made you Watchmen to your own Houses , and it is your business to study their peace and safety , and to seek their good ; it is your business to acquaint them with their Duty , that they may do it , and to warn them of their danger , that they may avoid it ; you are to cause your light to shine before them , that so in your light , they may see light ; you are to instruct them , that they may not be naught for lack of knowledge ; you are to shew them , and go before them in the way that they should go , that they may not wander and go directly to Hell , because they had none to direct them ; in a word , you are to make use of all means possible , that both you and yours may prove and approve what is the good , acceptable , and perfect will of God , and so be , and at last found to be wise unto Salvation . But if you , if any of you have been and will continue to be slothful , careless , negligent , and wanting to your duty herein , your Children and Servants may die in their ignorance , and iniquity ; but verily you shall not escape unpunished , for their blood shall be required at your hands , the holy and righteous God will require it , who is the great avenger of blood . And here are two things that I lay before you . First , Your wretched neglect of Family-Duties may bring upon you the Curse of your Children and Servants . I have known some , when they have for their flagitious Lives been Condemned to the Gallows , and not far from Execution , laid their ill life at the Parents door , crying out of the fondness of their Mothers for winking at and concealing of their faults , and of the neglect of their Fathers giving them no better Education , and setting before them such wicked and abominable examples ; and what do you think they and others in the same case with them are and will be doing for ever in the other World , in the anguish of their Souls , and the midst of intolerable Torments , when such poor Creatures come to be cast upon a bed of flames , and in the Lake which burneth with Fire and Brimstone ? when they come to feel the sinking weight , and scorching heat of the wrath and indignation of a provoked God , they will certainly curse themselves for their former follies and wicked courses , and they will curse their Old Companions , whom now they take so much pleasure in , and will wish they had never seen their faces , yea , and they will curse you too ; and we may rationally conclude their passionate breaking out into such expressions as these , I might have done better had I been Educated and brought up better ; I might have done my duty to God , had my Parents or my Master done their duty to me ; I might have been kept from the path of the Destroyer , and cleansed my way , and come to a Blessed Eternity , had I been taught to take heed unto my self , and to my way , according to the word . Had my Father and my Master instructed me , I might have known as much , and done as well as those that are now saved , and in Heaven . But instead of taking pains to make me good , their great desire and design was to make me Rich , and Great in the World , and so they have made me miserable . I have all my days taken wicked Courses , because they never took any care to instill into me right and holy Principles . Had I but seen or heard them reading the Holy Scriptures , and other good books themselves , or to their Families , I might have taken them up , and read them too , and got the knowledge of God , and my self , and my duty ; but they were for Romances , and Plays , and Cards , the Devils Books , and so we spent and lost our time and our selves too . Had I heard them Praying in their Families , seeking the face and favour of God , begging his Spirit and Grace , I might have prayed too , and sought God too , and beg'd the life of my precious Soul , and who knows but I might have obtain'd mercy . But instead of Praying , there was Swearing and Cursing , foolish and wicked talk , and I learnt their ways ; they set bad examples , and I was ready to follow them ; they struck the Spark , and I was like Tinder catching immediately , their examples were very vicious , and my Nature was as bad , and now my eternal ruine follows upon it ; they were Worldly , and so was I , they wicked , and so was I , they minded earthly things , and so did I ; they lived without God in the World , and so did I ; they carried themselves like so many Heathen , and so did I , and now I am in the place of endless misery , out of which there is no possibility of being delivered , nor making an escape , and in which there is no hope of any comfort , ease , alleviation or abatement of trouble and sorrow , infinite mercy it self will not grant the least drop of Water for the cooling and refreshment of any that are here , therefore cursed , yea for ever cursed be the day that I descended of such Parents , and cursed be the day on which I was bound an Apprentice to such a Master , and that ever my Lines were cast in such Families . Secondly ; As this will bring upon you the Curse of those poor miserable and eternally Lost Creatures , so it may justly expose you to the Wrath and Fury of a Righteous God , who for your neglect of him , and unfaithfulness to your Trust , and wicked Cruelty to those poor Souls , may justly punish you with everlasting Destruction from his presence , and from the glory of his Power , for their Blood crieth loud for Vengeance to be executed upon you . III. Your present safety , and the safety of your Houses doth very much depend upon this . By an holy care herein your confidence in God may be strengthened , and your comfortable expectations from him raised . On the other side , by your neglect hereof , both will be lessened and enfeebled . You see there are two Branches in this Assertion , I shall speak distinctly unto them , and by Instances prove and manifest the truth of them . First ; Your being wanting to the Worship of God and Religious Exercises in your Families , is the way to expose you and them to present Iudgments ; and while you continue so , you cannot rationally hope it should be otherwise , but may have a dreadful sound always in your Ears , and that in Prosperity the destroyer will come upon you ; Iob 15.21 . You may spend your day , yea day and night too in a fearful expectation of being devoured , but have nothing to warrant your hoping that God will be either a Sun for your comfort , or a Shield for your defence ; for the case is evident , that your neglect of God may justly provoke him to a neglect of you ; and what shadow of reason can you shew another , or please your selves with , why God should do any thing for the promoting or securing your welfare , when you will do nothing for the keeping up and advancing of his Honour ? Why should you walk safely when you will not walk uprightly and in your integrity ? Why should he make your Families prosperous ▪ if notwithstanding all that is or can be said , you will not make them religious ? You may find in Isa. 5. that when the Vineyard brought forth nothing but wild Grapes , after great cost bestowed upon it , and no less pains taken with it , the Hedge was to be taken away , and the Wall to be broken down , and the Clouds commanded to Rain no more upon it . Nay , not only a total neglect of Family-duty , but an omission in one point may , yea hath awakened and armed Divine Justice to the ruine of an house , as is plain in the case of Eli. He was a good and holy Man , in a time of publick danger , his heart trembled for the Ark of God , by which we know that it lay very near it ; and therefore I do not at all question but there was the Worship of God in his House , and that he had made Conscience of teaching and instructing his Children and Servants , but his Sons were Sons of Belial , that knew not the Lord so as to fear him ; vile and wicked wretches they were , openly abominably profane : The good old Man heard of it , and upon the hearing was grieved at his very heart , and for it he reprov'd them too : But he was wanting in one thing ; he spake to them in too soft and silken words ; he was too mild with his Sons , how angry soever he was with their sins : He did not exercise all his Authority and Power , nor draw against them the Sword of Justice ; he blam'd them , but he did not punish them , he did not use that severity toward them , which for their notorious Crimes they had deserved . Now do but read , how severe upon this account God threatned to be both upon him , and his whole House . He said , He would do that , at which both the Ears of every one that heard it should tingle . And indeed so they well might , because it was so terrible ; 1 Sam. 2 31 , 32 , 33. Behold the days come that I will cut off thine Arm , and the Arm of thy Fathers House , that there shall not be an Old Man in thine House , and thou shalt see an Enemy in my Habitation , in all the Wealth which God shall give Israel , and there shall not be an Old Man in thine House for ever ; and the Man of thine which I shall not cut off from mine Altar , shall be to consume thine Eyes , and to grieve thy Heart , and all the increase of thine House shall die in the flower of their Age. I beseech every one to believe , before your own sad and dismal experience be the cutting Argument to convince you , that all sin is of a ruining and destructive nature ; not only sins of commission , but sins of omission are so ; not only acts of Hostility against God , and open Rebellion , but contempt and neglect of him ; not only downright affronts , but the non-payment of that Homage which is his due ; it will make the Root of a Family rottenness , and the Blossoms to come up like Dust ; it will blast and wither the Off-spring of an House ; it will utter consume the Timber of it , though it were all heart of Oak ; it would pull down the Walls of it , though as thick as those of a Castle . So History tells us in the voice said to that wicked and bloody Emperor Phocas , though thou raise thy Walls as high as Heaven ▪ the sin within will spoil all . Sin will undermine the Foundation of an House , and shake the whole Fabrick , and like Gunpowder , blow it up , and bury it in its own Ruins . Now consider this all ye that forget God , lest he tear you in pieces , and there be none to deliver ; Psal. 50.22 . As he will not always strive , so he will not always bear . Some years he came to the barren Tree , expecting fruit , and finding none , he exercised much patience under frequent disappointments , but at length patience gave place to prudent Justice , and he said , Cut it down , why cumbers it the ground ? But all this may be prevented if men would be Friends to themselves , and study and practice those things which belong to , and make for their peace , before they are hidden from their Eyes . But now , Secondly ; Your worshipping of God in your Families , and keeping up Religious Exercises there , may be a means of preserving their peace , and keeping off those Iudgments which otherwise might break in upon them , Wisdom is a defence , and Money is a defence , but Wisdom is the better of the two , for it giveth life to them that have it , Eccles. 7.12 . There may be other things used for our safety , Locks , Bolts , Bars , &c. but that Wisdom which consists in the Fear of God , in the Love and Service of God , is the best . He that walketh in Righteousness shall dwell on high , his place of defence shall be the munition of Rocks , where Ruin cannot come at him ; Isa. 33.16 . I shall for the evidencing of this produce two great Instances . The former Instance shall be holy Iob : And in him we will take notice of two things ; his care of Duty , and God's care of him . We will begin with his care of Duty , and God himself , who is the faithful and true Witness , and cannot lye , did testifie thus of him , That he was a perfect and upright man , one that feared God and eschewed evil . He was indeed a singular eminent Saint , one by himself , not a Man like him in all the Earth , not one that had grown up to that stature , attained that pitch of Holiness which he had done : So much is said of him in general ; Iob 1.1 . Yea and in vers . 8. God himself gave this very report and character of him to the Devil , his mortal Enemy . Now let us take notice of what is more particularly recorded concerning him , in vers . 4 , 5. of that Chapter . His Sons had been lovingly , and like Brethren , feasting at one anothers Houses , and , as became them , invited their Sisters also . Iob now could not but be greatly pleased with that Brotherly Love which was among his Children , yet he was jealous over them with a godly Jealousie , and had his fears , lest in their feasting they should forget themselves , and do something that might offend God , grieve his Spirit , and provoke his Displeasure against them , and therefore he offered Burnt-Offerings according to the number of them all . He did not offer one single Sacrifice for them all , and so make short work of it , but he offered for each one a Sacrifice . Neither did he do this alone by himself , but with them , together with them , therefore it is said , that be sent and sanctified them ; but what are we to understand by that expression , what may be the meaning thereof ? I answer negatively ; he did not sanctifie them by working Grace in them , and infusing into them holy Habits . There is never a gracious Parent but would do it for all his Children if he could He that is holy himself , would have others so too . I wish , said Paul to Agrippa , that not only thou , but all that hear me this day were as I am , saving these Bonds . But it is not in their power , none can make saving impressions upon the Adamantine Heart , but he that hath an Arm of Omnipotency ; none can give the least Grace to Man but he that hath all Grace in himself ; therefore affirmatively , by Iob's sanctifying them some understand his praying to God that he would sanctifie them ; and doubtless he did so ; while some altogether seek the World , Greatness , Riches for their Children , a good Man doth above all seek Grace for himself , and for his Children ; he will go a begging to God for his Children , begging of Grace , Lord , whatever thou deniest my Children , do thou give them Grace ; though thou wilt not make them great , yet do thou make them good ; thus Abraham , Gen. 17.18 . O that Ishmael may live before thee , that his Soul might live , that he might live in thy favour , and according to thy command , so live as to please and obey thee ; and certainly this is an excellent way for the sanctifying of our own Hearts , and the Hearts of others . The effectual servent Prayer of a righteous Man availeth much in this case . Prayer that comes from Grace in him that puts it up may obtain Grace from him , on whose behalf he is a Suitor . But there is a late Learned and Holy Commentator , viz. Mr. Caryl , understands it thus , He sent and sanctified them , i. e. He sent them good Instructions , holy Counsels , and wholesome advice ; gave them notice of the Sacrifice that was to be , and order'd them to prepare themselves that they might be in a due frame to wait upon God in such an Ordinance , so that he did not perform this Duty alone , but they were to join with him in it ; and it is said , He did this continually , i. e. frequently , as often as occasion for the doing of it offered it self , so often he thus worshipped God himself , and called his Children to bear their part with him in it . We have seen the Piety of this Holy Man , now let us see his Safety ; if any ask what he was the better for this , I answer , a great deal ; though Iob did not serve God for his Hire , yet he did not serve God for Nought ; he did not make any temporal worldly advantages his end of serving God , yet he found and felt that it was not in vain for him to serve God , who is not wont to be behind-hand with the Children of Men ; he richly pays those that do but a Jobb of work for him ; so he did Cyrus ▪ much more those who are stedfast and immoveable abounding in his work . Iob here takes care of his Family that they should serve and worship God , and God took care of his substance , Iob 1.10 The Devil that was no Friend to God , nor to his Honour , took notice thereof , and could not but own it ; Hast thou not made an hedge about him , and about his house , and about all that he hath on every side ? God hath two sorts of Hedges , there is an hedge of thorns , and this God speaks of , Hos. 2.6 . I will hedge up thy way with thorns ; that was to keep her from Idolatry , from running after the Gods of the Heathen , whom she called her Lovers ; she should have little heart to go after them , by reason of those sorrows and troubles that would meet her ; it is a great mercy when God orders out difficulties , and pains , and vexation in a sinful course , when he hedgeth them about with Thorns , so that they cannot wander from God , and turn aside to crooked paths , with the workers of iniquity without pricking their Fingers , and piercing themselves thorough with many sorrows ; this speaks the Love of God , and is one of his special favours ▪ But this Hedge which God had set about Iob was of another nature , an hedge of gracious and powerful protection ; a strong hedge , sufficient to reach its end ; an hedge that was no where thin and weak , there was no gap to be found in it , which an Enemy could enter in at , till God afterward for wise and holy ends gave leave . This must of necessity be a good Hedge , because it was of God's own making ; thou hast set it : and it also was a large Hedge , fetching a great compass , for it took in all ; it was about him , his person , thou hast set it about him , about his Soul and his Body , about his Graces and his inward Comforts , his Life , and Health , and Strength ; and about his House , the Habitation it self , and all within Doors , Wife , and Children , and Servants , and all his Goods ; yea , and about all that he had , though at never so great a distance from home , his Fields , and his Cattel , his Grass , and Hay , and Corn , his great things , and his little things too ; his Camels and Oxen , yea , and his Asses , and Sheep , and Lambs , all that he had ; and the Scripture adds , it was on every side . He could look no way but he might see Salvation , so that neither Devil could come at him , nor any other Enemy , without Divine permission : Indeed afterward as that Chapter tells us , when the Devil , that inveterate and implacable Enemy falsly accus'd and charg'd that good Man , telling God that he had all along been no better than a Mercenary , and that a change of Providence would make a change in him ; if Providence did but frown upon him , he would quickly fall a Cursing of God , a very touch would turn him . God did for the glory of his own Grace , and the vindication of his Servants honour , give the Devil leave to try what he could do by himself and his Instruments , at the same instant resolving to allay the bitterness of the Cup , to support him under the burden ▪ and at last to bring him off with honour and without loss , or any cause of complaint , which was at last done ; for Iob 42.12 . God blessed the latter end of Job more than his beginning ; yet he then had a Blessing and that a great one ; there was not only protection , but likewise a benediction ; for Satan could not but acknowledge , that God had blessed the work of Job 's hands , and that he experienced the power of that blessing , and reap'd the fruit of it , for his substance was increased in the Land ; by all which you may plainly see that the Father of Lies ( though his design was to bespatter Iob ) did yet speak truth when he said , Job did not serve God for nought ; and as he did not , so no body else ever did , nor ever shall ; God is too good and gracious to suffer that , such a reproach shall never cleave to his glorious Majesty . The other Instance which I told you I would bring for the proving of this , that Family-worshipping of God may be a singular means to keep off present Judgments is a tremendous and very remarkable Providence which while I was studying upon this Subject I happily met with in Polanus his Syntagma ; liber 5. cap. 22. de terrae motu . And it is this , In the Year of our Lord 1584. there was an Earthquake in Switzerland , in the Territory of Bern , in which one Hill being removed out of its place , and violently carried and dasht against another , did overwhelm and bury an whole Village that consisted of fourscore and ten Houses , not any of them being spared and escaping , save only the part of one House , in which the Master of the Family , with his Wife and Children were together at that very time upon their bended Knees praying and seeking of God. IV. Setting up the Worship of God in Families is the way to promote your own Interest in them ; for God hath made a most sweet and gracious connexion of his own glory and Mens good , so that in seeking the former they find the latter ; in keeping God's Commandments there is great reward ; upon seeking first the Kingdom of God and his Righteousness , other things shall be added , cast in as an overplus . Folly , Sin makes Men and Women cheap and contemptible . Godliness puts a Beauty upon them , makes their Faces shine , and renders them amiable , considerable , truly great in the Eyes of those that know them . But it may be , some of you do think your selves not at all concerned here , and that you need not take any care nor bestow any thoughts upon this , for your Interest is great and safe enough , and you can well enough secure and maintain it with the greatest ease ; are not you the Master and the Mistress , and have not you the Purse and the whole power in your hands ? And are not all under your Roof under you ? so that if any of them will not know their places , nor keep their distance ; If they will not be observant of your orders , obedient to your commands , nor carry towards you with a due respect , you can make them smart for it , by pinching them in their comforts , making them feel the weight of your hand , and if that will not do , by turning them out of Doors . Let them affront or slight you if they dare . Very well , my Friends , this is great , and you are somebody , at least in your own Eyes ; and it must be granted that all this you may do , and being done it may turn to account ; but all this doth not , will not make things so sure , nor strengthen your interest so much as you may imagine ; no , no , be assured of this , that when all is done , your having the Power and the Purse in your hands , will not befriend you at so great a rate , nor so effectually secure to you the love , and fear , and awe of those with whom you have to do , as exemplary Piety , a Religious Life , and putting the Duties of Godliness in practice ; I well know , some Spirits are very rugged and boisterous , not easily drawn and bowed to their Duty ▪ all means must be used , and all little enough ; but this is certain , it is no prudence , when others are applied , to omit the best . The Smith would shew much folly in spending his time , and tiring himself in beating and knocking of cold Iron , when by putting it into the Fire till it be red hot , he may form and fashion it as he pleaseth . It is a gross Errour in Men proceeding much from Pride and Brutish Passion , and plainly discovers their Ignorance to conceive , that their huffing and hectoring , their ranting and raging at their Children and Servants will procure them such a respect and esteem among them , as Holiness will do , and Prayer , and living in a consciencious discharge of the Duties of their Places , and that upon a Threefold Account . First ; It is the way to engage God on your side ; who hath said , He will honour those that honour him : Do Men study to exalt God , they themselves shall be exalted ; if his Name be precious to them ; theirs shall be so to him , I will honour them , saith God , he will do it himself , and that by taking them up at last to Heaven , and cloathing them there with everlasting glory ; yea , and he will make others honour them too . God speaking in Psal. 91. of one that loves him , that loves his Name , and Interest , speaks of many things that he will do for him , and among the rest he promiseth to honour him , and he will be as good as his word ; it shall be done both in Time , and to Eternity . Secondly ; This is the way to instill into your Families right Principles ; that fear and respect which you have with them upon the other account is altogether forc'd , you do by meer violence extort it from them , and so it is not kindly , nor will it be lasting : they will reverence you before your Face , but what will they do behind your Back ? Multiply very hard thoughts of you , and speak as hard words against you where they safely may ; but in this way of holy Duty you take a course to rectifie their Spirits , and sow in them those Seeds that may , and in all likelihood will spring up to your own comfort and advantage , for while you do endeavour to teach them the good will of God concerning them , and to instill into their Hearts the love and fear of his holy Name , they will at the same time , and with the same pains and labour be taught to pay that reverence and fear which they owe to you ; shew them the way to honour God , and they will thereby learn to give that honour which is due to you ; and it is to be hoped that what they do now , will proceed from an inward Principle , and what doth so is of all things the most durable and like to hold . Thirdly ; Religion acted to the Life carrieth a Majesty along with it . It was the Image of God instampt upon Man at first that did so excellently fit and qualifie him for the Government of this inferiour World ; it was this shining in his Countenance that struck an awe upon the other Creatures , and made them submit to him . As soon as Sin had defac'd that Image , and he faln short of the glory of God , they threw off the Yoke , and grew stubborn and rebellious ; the more this Image is restored to Men , the more there is of God appearing in them , the more they live to God , and walk with him , the more will they recover their lost honour ; a Crown upon the Head , a Sword , a Scepter in the Hand will not render a Person so truly honourable as Religion will. This strikes an awe even upon carnal Men , when in the Company of such , and often restrains them , and keeps them from those exorbitances into which their own cursed Lusts would hurry them ; if this doth not gain you their Hearts , so that they shall be knit to you , it will commend you to their Consciences . Let Men think , and say , and act as they please , there is no such probable , no such effectual way for the working in the minds of people a real and permanent goodness , for the making of Children loving and dutiful , and of Servants industrious and faithful , as is an instilling into them the Principles of Religion , and teaching them the good fear of the Lord ; when this is once done , your Hearts may trust in them , and you will find them devoted to the pleasing of you , and set for the promoting your Interest , that will preserve them from running into such sins as others do not stick at ; it will make them tremble at that which others will commit with greediness ; they shall not be supinely careless and negligent in your business , nor shall they be Companions of Fools , running with them into excess of Riot ; they shall not pilfer and steal from you , that they may have wherewith to gratifie and fulfil a Lust ; they shall not embezzle your Goods , nor betray the Trust you repose in them ; they dare not do these things ; there is a Conscience within that restrains them , an Eye above which awes them . You have two famous instances in Scripture for the proof of this , which I shall mention , the one of a great Man , the other of a poor Servant . The former is that of good Nehemiah : What made him so excellent a Governour , and so tender over the people , studying their ease and comfort ? he had precedents enough to justifie him in another manner of Carriage toward them , Neh. 5.14 , 15. For twelve years I and my brethren had not eaten the bread of the Governours . He made not use of that which was his just allowance ; The former Governours which had been before me were chargeable to the people , and had taken of them bread and wine , besides forty pieces of silver , yea , even their Servants bare rule over the people ; so that this Oppression was grown to be a custom ; Why did not he keep it up ? The people having been accustomed to such a load would not have kicked now , that was not it ; he did not fear the people , but he fear'd God , who alone was more than they , and that was it that kept him from such practices , as he tells us in the same Verse , So did not I because of the fear of God. The other instance is that of Ioseph , who was indeed of a most Noble Descent , the best Family in all the World , but having fallen under the heavy displeasure of his envious Brethren they sold him ; and at this time he was a poor Servant , nay , of the worst sort , a Slave , and what would not such an one do to recover his liberty , or to enlarge his comforts ? His Mistress burnt in Love to him , and was earnestly set for an unlawful Enjoyment , and thereupon tempted him to a compliance with her Lust. Carnal Reason now might have suggested ; here is a fair opportunity offered for advantaging your self , a refusal will inrage her , if you do not yield to her Love you kindle her Wrath , and that will make the House too hot for you ; but if you do comply with the motion , and accept her tender'd kindness , you may be sure of a Friend , you engage her favour , and who knows but by having that you may recover your liberty ; however you may promise your self much from it ; but this would not take , Ioseph had been taught better in his Fathers House , and he had not forgot all , he had brought from home with him such a Principle as was his preservation from t his fiery Dart , an excellent Antidote against this insinuating Posyon , and that was a Spirit of ingenuous gratitude , and holy fear , Gen. 39.8 , 9. My Master hath committed all that he hath to my hand , there is none greater in his house than I , neither hath he kept back any thing from me , but thee , because thou wast his Wife , how then can I do this great wickedness and sin against God! You see here the power of good Principles , and the blessed effect of Family Religion . Whereas the neglect of this is of as malevolent influence , and pernicious consequence . An House where there is not holy instructions and exercises , is like a Field or Garden not cultivated that will be over-run with Weeds : When Masters of Families neglect their Duty to God , they set their Children and Servants a wretched Example , and teach them to neglect their Duty to them , by their not owning and honouring of God , they teach them to disesteem and disrespect themselves ; for it is but just , a righteous thing with God , that what measure they meet out should be meeted out to them again ; by their Irreligion they teach their Children and Servants Atheism , by their Looseness they teach them Profaneness , by their playing at Cards at home they teach them Gaming abroad , by which the Estates they laboured for are brought to nothing , and their Children to a Morsel of Bread , if not to the Gallows at last . This is no more than what such Masters and Parents do deserve , no more than what they bring upon themselves , and no more than what God hath threatned , for he hath said , They that despise him shall be lightly esteemed ; where observe , it is not said , God himself will lightly esteem them , though that is certain he will do so , for they shall not stand in his presence , he will put them away like dross , and say , cast them out of my sight ; but he will likewise so order it , that they shall be lightly esteemed by others . God will expose them to the contempt of others , yea , to the contempt of their own Families , their own Relations , their own Children and Servants . Take an instance of this ; Nabal was a very rich Man , and very great , but a very bad walker , and of an ugly temper , and though all fear'd him none lov'd him , he was a burden to his own House , what did one of his Men think of him , and say too behind his back , 1 Sam. 25.17 . He is such a son of Belial that a man cannot speak to him ; yea , and Abigail his prudent Wife , though she would have covered his shame , yet she could not , no , nor give him a good word , vers . 25. Let not my Lord regard the men of Belial , for as his name is , so is he ; Nabal is his name , and folly is with him . He both is a Fool , and acts like one . Whereas your setting and keeping up the Worship of God in your Families , your Exemplary and Gospel-conversation your close and humble walking with God will put a singular beauty and lustre upon you , and make your Faces shine in the Eyes of others , and commend you to their Consciences ; so that they who are under your Government , and do understand themselves , will freely submit to your conduct and order , obeying not only for Wrath , but also for Conscience sake ; such thoughts as these will at sometimes be making their way into their minds ▪ and repeating themselves . It was the great goodness of God , and tender love of our Parents , that cast our Lines in such a Family , where our Master is a good Man , and our Mistress a gracious Woman , both of them Persons fearing God , they seek our good , taking care not only for our Bodies , providing Food for them when well , and Physick when sick , and teaching us the Mystery of our Calling ; but they look after the welfare of our Souls too , that we may be holy here , and happy hereafter , know and serve God in time , and enjoy him to Eternity ; how much are we obliged by this to take care of their business , to lay our selves out in their Service , and be good in our Places , and study to please them well in all things ; if they have in them any spark of ingenuity , if any sense of kindness , if any love to themselves they cannot but now and then , yea , frequently have such workings in their Minds . Object . But here some may be ready to step in and say , Doth not experience prove the contrary , have not others , nay , have not you your self seen it otherwise ? Rebellious Children , and unfaithful wicked Servants in those Houses where there is constant praying and reading , and other Religious Exercises . To this I answer , First , By granting it is so , too too often so , it is most certain , and no less sad than certain , and worthy to be matter of great Lamentation , that there are some very bad Persons to be found in very good Families . There was a Bloody Cain in Adam's Family , whom his immediate Parents loss and ruin could not make wise ; and an unnatural Ham in Noah's , whom a Deluge of Waters could not wash from his filthiness ; a scoffing Ishmael in Abraham's , notwithstanding all the care and pains he took in teaching and commanding his Children ; there was Iudas a Traytor , an Incarnate Devil in the Family of Christ himself , who spake and liv'd as never Man did . A Weed may be found in the choicest Garden , a Serpent was in Paradise , which may become relief to those gracious Parents that have degenerate , and graceless Children . Pity them , bemoan them , weep over them , do your utmost to reclaim them , and to turn them to the wisdom of the Just ; but consider , this is not your case alone ; David was a Man after God's own Heart , yet what a dismal company of Children had he ? Of whom I do not remember one good , except Solomon , who notwithstanding all his wisdom was none of the best : But , Secondly , This I may lay down , as I believe , without fear of a contradiction , that for the greater part , those Families which the Rulers of them are careful to make Bethel 's houses of God thorough practices of Piety , and actions of Religious Worship , are the Seminaries of Virtue and true Religion . These are the Gardens in which Christ hath his precious Plants ; these the little inclosures where he reaps his richest Crops ; I do not indeed deny , but as the Wind bloweth where it listeth , so doth the Divine Spirit , who is a most free Agent , and chooseth what Objects he pleaseth to work upon . Lepers in Israel may have their loathsome Disease continuing upon them when Naaman a Syrian shall meet with a Cure. There was in the House of wicked Ieroboam , who made Israel to sin , a good Abijah , in whom there was some good thing found toward the Lord God of Israel . God had his Saints in the House of a Monster , Bloody Nero ; but it was to an Abraham that he promised he would be a God , and to his Seed . It is in such Houses there is found the Seed to serve him , which shall be accounted to him for a Generation . It is these that travel in birth for their Children and Servants , that they might be brought forth to God , and have Christ formed in their Hearts , and unto these God grants the seeing of the travel of their Souls to their satisfaction . That precious Seed which they sow in holy Discourses , prudent and pious Counsels , and Religious Examples , God is pleased to water with his Blessing , so that it shall root , and spring up , and bring forth fruit . But , Thirdly ; Let us cast our Eye again upon , and take another view of that Scripture which we have already made use of , Gen. 18.19 . where you have God speaking thus , I know Abraham that he will command his Children , and his houshold after him , and they shall keep the way of the Lord. Observe the phrases or words as they lye in our Translation ; he will command , and they shall keep : I must acknowledge my self to be singular and alone in the Notion , having consulted some Learned Expositors upon the place , and found none that take any notice of it ; but , as those that repair to them know that is no strange nor unusual case , therefore I will with humble modesty communicate my thoughts to you , and submit them to the judgment of such as are able ; I look upon these latter words not only as Predictory , foretelling what the Event would be , what his command would produce , and how it would work , but also Promissory , and so securing that good and desireable issue . Abraham will teach his Children , and his Houshold after him , and saith God , they shall keep the way of the Lord , since Abraham will do his Duty , I will succeed and prosper him in the doing of it ; he shall not lose his labour , nor take pains to no purpose . The truth is , God will not suffer his faithful Servants to be totally disappointed , and lye down in their shame at last ; let things issue how they will they shall not lose their reward ; in their Duty they shall have peace , their endeavours shall be accepted , and themselves shall be admitted into their Masters joy . Though Israel be not gathered , yet shall I be glorious in the eyes of the Lord , and my God shall be my strength , Isa. 49.5 . but very often God gives them to see the desires of their hearts , so that they attain the end which they propounded to themselves , as here , since Abraham will see to it that his Children and his Household be taught , God would see to it , that they should learn and practice what they were taught . He would set up the worship of God in his Family , and maintain it there as long as he liv'd ; and God would so influence and order their Spirits , that they should keep it up after him , they should love and honour and serve God after his example , and after he was dead and gone , godliness should be posteritiz'd in his Family . V. This one thing is the High-way to a Blessing , to have the favour of God , together with the pleasant fruits of that favour , do but you in the sincerity of your hearts , and from a gracious Principle perform your Family duties , and set up the worship of God there , and you may comfortably expect that God in his great goodness and mercy will pour down his blessing upon your Families , and make your Family a blessing unto you . First , The Blessing of God shall be upon your Family , it shall be upon you who are the Parents , and Masters , and upon yours as well as you , like that precious Ointment , which being poured out upon the head of Aaron , from thence descended to the Skirts of his Garment ; there is a notable place to this purpose , a place which hath a double aspect , a terrible frowning one upon the wicked , but a smiling and comfortable one to the godly , Prov. 3.33 . The Curse of the Lord is in the House of the Wicked , but he blesseth the Habitation of the Iust. Let us well consider this Scripture , The Curse of the Lord is in the House of the Wicked ; he doth not say the Curse is impendent , and hangs over it , nor that it is at the door , ready to draw the latch , but it is already in , it hath made its entry , and taken possession : and as it is in it , it spreads and goes all over it , it goes into every room , and mingles it self with every thing there , it lights and abides upon the man , and upon all that he hath ; if you go into the Mans House , you may possibly see what will dazle your eyes , there is costly Furniture , Rich Hangings , Great Cupboard-Heads of Plate , Garments of Silk , Sattin , and Velvet wrought with Gold , Tables spread with variety of the greatest Dainties , as the Psalmist saith , Psal. 73. They have more than heart can wish , but there is no fear of God there , instead of that , there is a great deal of debauchery , and prophaneness , ranting , roaring , gaming , healthing , cursing , swearing , obscene filthy talk , and as foul actions ; Hell it self is broke out , there is the smoak , the fumes of that bottomless pit , and there is the curse of God too ; that Flying-Roul mention'd Ezek. 5.2 . the length whereof is twenty Cubits , and the breadth thereof ten , and saith that Text , it shall enter into the house , and remain there , it takes up its abode , and it is not idle and unactive , works indeed gradually , and oftentimes insensibly , no body perceives it , but it works effectually , it shall consume the House with the Timber and Stones thereof ; it hath strong and sharp teeth , that can bite stones in pieces , Psal. 37.35 , 36. I have seen the Wicked in great power , spreading himself like a green Bay-Tree , yet he passed away , and loe ! he was not ▪ yea , I sought him , but loe ! he could not be found . But let us go to the other part of the Text , and see what report that makes us , He blesseth the Habitation of the Righteous . Observe now , there is righteousness in the habitation , a good man dwells there , and out of the good Treasure of his heart he brings forth good things , there hath been a gracious Principle Divinely inspired into him , and it is his desire and endeavour to act suitably to that Principle ; in his House you may see not only sobriety , but also righteousness towards Man ; and yet more than so , there is godliness , a making conscience of performing all that duty which they owe to God ; now as there is righteousness , there is a blessing there too , God hath blessed that man , and his house , in turning them from their iniquities , in giving them such a Spirit , and that blessing doth abide , it shall never be revok'd , nor revers'd . God will say in this case , as Isaac did with respect to Iacob , Gen. 27.33 . I have blessed him , yea , and he shall be blessed ; and that is not all neither , the Text saith , He blesseth his habitation ; he hath not only done it , but he goeth on still to do it , the old blessing remains firm and valid , and God is pleased to add new ones to it , and will continue doing so , till he at last be what Moses said of Nepthali , Deut. 33.23 . satisfied with favour , and full of the blessing of the Lord , what may we not say of such an House , Godliness is there , and God himself will be there too , for he is nigh unto all that call upon him , that call upon him in truth . He looks upon others afar off , and keeps his distance , but he is near these , he stands at their right hand , he dwells in them , and with them in their heart and house , and where ever he dwells , the house is the better for him , he always brings enough with him to make him welcom . He saith peace be to this house , and mercy be to this house , yea , and salvation be to this house ; he will quiet this house when there is a storm , and comfort it when there is trouble , and uphold it when it is sinking , and repair it when under decays , and shine upon it , and prosper it . Seeing it is a Religious house , God will make it a comfortable house , seeing the incense of Prayer goeth up from the house to Heaven ; a shower of blessing shall come down from Heaven upon the house , a variety of duties shall be accompanied with a variety of mercies , and a succession of duties crown'd with a succession of blessings ; as day unto day shews mindfulness and night unto night gratitude , so day unto day on Gods part , shall shew his love , and night unto night his faithfulness . Not but that in those very Families where there are most holy exercises , there may be many afflictive exercises . Davids house was not as the clear Sun-shine , or a Morning without Clouds ; there are among his dearest Children Iniquities and Transgressions ; and notwithstanding the everlasting Covenant , ordered in all things , and sure , into which God hath entered with them ; he hath reserved to himself the liberty of visiting those iniquities with the Rod , and those Transgressions with Stripes , yet this doth not hinder their blessedness . Though afflictions may and do come in , yet they cannot crowd or shut the blessing out . Iacob met with a great deal of trouble , nevertheless the blessing remained upon him . Nay , God will take such special care of his People , as that the very Rod shall blossom with Love , and their afflictions shall be turn'd into advantages , out of the Eater shall come Meat ; that which devours their comforts , shall feed their graces , the gains shall make a full , yea abundant amends for the loss ; and whatever their apprehensions for the present may be , while they smart and are in pain , yet the day shall come wherein they shall be reconciled to the darkest and most severe dispensations . when they shall see , yea and feel cause with thankfulness to own that Gods smitings were a kindness , and that his rebukes were an excellent Oyl , that instead of breaking the head , did better the heart . Secondly , This is the way to have the Covenant made good to you , and an accomplishment of the Promises , which are more worth than all the gold of Ophir , or the riches of both the Indies . To this purpose that calls for our consideration , which God spake concerning Abraham in that place , to which we have twice already had occasion to have our recourse , Gen. 18.19 I know him that he will command his Children and his Servants after him , and they shall keep the way of the Lord to do justice and judgement ; and if he and they do so , they will do well , but what then ? what will he get by it ? read the very next words , that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him ; if Abraham would be careful of his duty , God would magnifie his mercy upon him . Obedience to Precepts is followed with the performance of promises : but what was it that God had spoken of him ? it was good , much , considerable , very great and admirable things which God had spoken . That he would make of him a great Nation , that he would make his name great , that he would bless him , and make him a blessing ; that he would bless them that blessed him , and curse them that cursed him , and that in him all the Families of the Earth should be blessed , Gen. 12.2 , 3. in thee , i. e. in thy Seed , in Christ who shall come of that according to the flesh , shall all be blessed , for Christ came to bless them in turning them from their iniquities , in making peace for them with God , and bringing them back to God. Now , saith God , Abraham in this way will make all these my promises sure to him , he will prevent any obstacles and rubs from being in their way , Abraham will be dear over my interest , and name , and glory , he will exalt and honour me in his family , he will breed and train them up for me , he will use his Authority for me , and lay his command upon them to fear me , and to keep my way , and therefore I will be as good as my word to him , of all that which I have spoken concerning him , not one tittle shall fail . I beseech you take notice and remember it , that a care to promote the interest and honour of God , the setting up the service and worship of God in your Families , is the way to bring over to you the good of the Promises . The Apostle Peter tells us that the Promises are exceeding great and precious , so great that we cannot measure them , we cannot grasp them in our understandings ; they are so great , that they contain Heaven and Earth in them , and all good things , and they are so precious , that you cannot rate them according to their worth ; we may easily overvalue our selves , and the enjoyments here below , that is done everyday , but we cannot over-value promises ; and would you not , my dear Friends , be heartily glad of an interest in them , and being able to lay a just claim to them , would you not be glad to go to the whole heap of promises , and with the arms of faith sweep them up , and say these are all mine own , these are the good things my God hath given me , these are those pleasant places in which my lines are fallen ? In a word , would you not be glad at heart if all these exceeding great and precious promises should empty themselves and unlade all their treasures into your bosoms ? I doubt not but you would , am sure you have reason , and if you would , your best and only way is to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ , and to serve and honour God in your personal and domestick Capacities , and then , Thirdly ; As this is the way to bring down a blessing from God upon you and upon your Families , so it is the way to make your Families a blessing to you , and your Children a blessing to you . Oh , how sweet and desirable a thing is this ! What a comfort is it to Prarents to have such Children as are their Comfolts , their Joy and Crown ? such Children as are blest themselves , and blessings unto them , when so many are their poor Parents grief and sorrow , their curse and shame , of whom them cannot think without a sigh , on whom they cannot look without indignation ? Children , who fill their Parents lives with bitterness , and make them a lamentation thoroughout , and at last bring down their gray Hairs with sorrow to the Grave ? Children , that while young , were their Parents hope and joy , but when they were grown up , became first the Companions of Fools , and then foolish themselves , and so prove Thorns in the sides of their Parents , and Pricks in their Eyes . I know , you that are Parents would not have your Children such ; it is your duty to love them , and unless you have cast off all good nature , you do love them , and would rejoyce in them and over them to do them good . Now this is one special way for the bringing it to pass ; Prov. 20.3 . The just man walketh his integrity ; his Children are blessed after him . Here is a good Man , and he chuseth to walk in a good way . Dr. Iermin in his Paraphrastical Meditations upon the place hath these words ; There are several Walks of Men in this World , one walketh in his pleasure as it were in the walks of a Garden , another walketh in his profit , and he walketh as it were up and down the Exchange , another walketh in his trouble , and he walketh as it were in a Wood ; another walketh in his poverty , and he walketh as it were in a Desart ; another walketh in his beastly lusts of drunkenness and uncleannness , and he delighteth to walk as it were in mire and dirt ; but the just man walketh in his integrity , and he walketh as it were in the holy Temple , but that his walk is to walk still on , and not to turn back till he come to the end of his Life . Much care is taken and many means are used that men may leave their Children in an happy condition , but he that walketh in his integrity takes the most proper , compendious and effectual course to bring himself to blessedness , and his Posterity too ; so saith the wisest of men in this Text ; His Children are blessed after him . Supposing that they tread in his steps , and walk in their integrity , as he had done in his before them . And Children blessed of God are their Parents blessings , and will be the joy of their hearts , and the staff of their Age ; yea and Servants may be blessings also to the Families in which they live ; and therefore are not to be slighted , nor opprest , nor abused . You read in the word of Truth , that the house of Laban was blessed for the sake of Iacob , and the Master how bad and unjust soever he had been in other things , was ingenuous in acknowledging he had by experience found it so . And the like is recorded of the House of Potiphar ; Gen. 39.5 . It came to pass , from the time that he had made him Overseer in his house , and over all that he had , that the Lord blessed the Egyptians house for Joseph ' s sake , and the Lords's blessing was upon all that he had both in the house and in the field . Now teaching them the knowledge and fear of God by your instructions , and alluring them to the practice of Godliness by your Religious Examples , together with prayer , is the way to make yours such . VI. To set up the Worship and Service of God in your Families , is an excellent way to get and maintain peace in your own bosoms while you live ; and how sweet that is those do very well know , and being consulted , will tell you , who have felt the Lashes of an enraged Conscience , and a Worm within gnawing and tearing them day and night . What would not such poor Creatures give ? what would they not do to be delivered from the frights it puts them in , and the pain it causeth ? And I must needs say , it is in my account just matter of wonder how any body can , and that any one of those do enjoy themselves a day , an hour , who live in the constant and shameful neglect of God their Maker , and of their duty this way . Methinks there should be always Nemesis à tergo , a dreadful sound in their Ears , they should be ashamed and blush to think of God , or lift up their faces toward Heaven , ashamed to look Man in the face , since they have so far put off Man , as to neglect the great Work of Man ; ashamed to shew their heads in their own houses , where they live like so many brutes , contrary to the dictates of Nature , and where the very stones and timber may be swift and loud witness against them . Methinks they should never see Wife , nor Child , nor Servant , without such bitter reflections as these , these poor creatures have a love for me , but they have a cause to hate me : now they shew me respect , but the day will come when they will curse me , for they are like to be undone by me . I bring them up in Ignorance , Irreligion , and Atheism , I live without God in the World , and so do they , through my means they are not like to come at last to Heaven , because they do not walk in the way that leads thither , and it is my fault , who do not teach them that way , nor go before them in it . I am a bloody Husband to my Wife , an unnatural Father to my Children , a cruel Master to my Servants ; when their Parents bound them to me , they did little think what a wretch I am , I do not take any care of their precious and immortal Souls ; and indeed , how can it be thought that they should be kind and compassionate towards the Souls of others , who are cruel to their own ; it is not likely Charity should be active abroad , when it doth not begin at home . Methinks such Persons as these should every day feel a tormenting sting within them , and go up and down in pain , and that their Consciences should be very uneasie , and often in a day reproaching them , and flinging dirt in their faces , yea flashing Hell Fire in them . I do not wonder that many of these Men do not care to be alone , not much at home but love to be abroad with their boon Companions as bad as themselves , among whom they may lay their Trouble with their Liquor ; but they will get but little by this , this is but casting Conscience into a sleep for a time , that will awake again and rouze and roar ; when they come to themselves Conscience will return to its work , and strike up again . Is this thy Love to her that lies in thy bosom ? dost thou dwell with her as a Man of knowledge , or an Heir of the Grace of Life ? are these thy bowels to thy Children which came out of thy Loins ? hast thou a mind to bring them up for the destroyer , and to be fewel for everlasting burnings ? And is this thy mercy to thy Servants ? didst thou take them to corrupt them ? if they had any good thing in them toward the Lord God of Hosts , wouldst thou utterly quench it ? and if they were bad , thou takest a course to make them seven times more the Children of the Devil than before . Thou wouldest have them , O Man ! please thee , and wilt thou not shew them how they may walk so as to please God ? Thou wouldest have them to mind thy Shop , and wilt not thou mind their Souls ? Thou wouldst have them take pains in thy House , but thou wilt take none for their Welfare and Salvation . It is far better to be such persons Horses and Dogs , than to be their Children and Servants , for then they would be better look'd after . And this I doubt not but I may safely affirm , if such Men as these have any peace in such a way as this , they are either grosly ignorant , and know not the Judgment of the Lord , nothing of Religion to purpose ; or they are very Atheists , such in Judgment as well as in Practice , or their Consciences are fear'd as with an hot Iron , or wholly benumm'd , are cast into a profound sleep , and have no fear of God before their Eyes . And let them know , that sooner or latter , the present Calm will be followed with a most terrible Storm ; the Wrath of God , and the Rage of Conscience will cause it , and that will blow away all your comforts , and throw down all your hopes , and who can tell but it may carry you to Hell with the People that forget God ? But on the other side , an hearty Love to the Name , Honour and Interest of God , and the setting up of his Worship and Service in your Families , from such an excellent and holy Principle is the direct and ready way to a sweet inward peace , the way to have a Calm , and Serenity in your Souls , though the Clouds may be black , and the Storms great which are upon your Tabernacles . Let things issue how they will in your Families , as to your Children and Servants , whether they do get good or no , whether they go to Heaven or to Hell ; yet this will be a quieting and comforting consideration to you , that you in some good measure have done your duty . I have been much taken with those words of Samuel to Israel , after they had rejected the Lord from being King over them , and he had made Saul King ; 1 Sam. 12.23 . As for me , God forbid that I should sin against the Lord in ceasing to pray for you ; but I will teach you the good and the right way . O! do you so , my dear Friends , let it be the same with you ; set this excellent Copy before you , and write after it , frequently considering with your selves , what an hearty reviving Cordial it will be when you are able to say to your Families , Blessed be God , I have not ceased to pray for you , many a Petition I have put up , and many a Tear I have shed in my Closet , nor have I ceased to pray with you ; your selves are my Witnesses , how frequent and earnest a Suitor I have been to God on your behalf . I have been pleading and wrestling every day , morning and evening ; and I have also been teaching you the good and the right way , that of Truth and Holiness , that of God's Commandments , the Scripture way which is good , because it is clean , and pure , and right ; because it brings to Heaven and Happiness all those that travel and are undefiled in it : And yet further , it will make the Cordial much more strong , and prove a singular addition to your comfort , when you are able to say , I have not only shewn and taught you that good and right way , but I have likewise taken you by the hand , and led you into it . You and I have had a communion in holy Duties . We have gone to the House God in company , and at home we have walked in the way of God in company . How chearfully may you converse together , and go about the work and business of the day after you have in the morning offered up your Sacrifice unto God ; and how may you at night part with one another in peace , and lye down to rest in your Beds , after you have desir'd the spreading of the Divine Wing over you , and committed your selves to the protection of that God who is the Keeper of Israel , and doth neither slumber nor sleep . If there be not wilful commission of known sins , nor a wilful omission of other known duties , but a sincere desire and endeavour of approving your selves to God in all holy Conversation , a due and constant care of performing Family-duties will afford you great peace , so that nothing need to offend you . And let me add this , that constancy in this work will be a soveraign Antidote against many of those things that cause convulsions , and broils , and disorders in too many houses . What passions are there in them , and how unruly and exorbitant , by which all is put into a flame ? What discontents , what animosities , what quarrels and contentions , that people are so far from enjoying one another , that they cannot enjoy themselves ? by means whereof the nearness of the Relation becomes a great aggravation of the affliction ; but joynt-fellowship in Family-duties and execises of Religion , may very much help in this case , both to the purpose of preventing those feuds , if you do but consider that of the Apostle ; 1 Tim. 2.8 . I will that men pray every where , lifting up holy hands without wrath and doubting . As you must pray in Faith , so in Love. You must not in wrath pray to him that is the God of Love. It will also help to the repairing of a breach , and healing of a wound , when there is one made ; if you duly consider that of our Saviour ; Matth. 5.23 , 24. If thou bring thy gift to the Altar , and there remembrest that thy Brother hath ought against thee , leave there thy gift before the Altar , and go thy way ; first be reconciled to thy Brother , and then come and offer thy gift . Reconciliation must go before supplication , if we would have audience with God. How can you think your Father should be pleased if you live at variance with his Children ? Peter would have Love between Husband and Wife , that their prayers might not be hindered ; 1 Pet. 3.7 . They that quarrel together , will not be fit to pray together . Observe Iames his method laid down for general observance among Christians ; Iam. 5.16 . Confess your faults one to another , and pray one for another that ye may be healed . Seek peace with one another by confession , and then peace with God by prayer . But to return , this Family-serving of God will promote inward peace in them that are Governours ; it cannot but be a comfort to you to think , that while other houses have been the sink of sin , yours have been the dwelling places of the most High. Others have been Bethavens , houses of vanity , yours have been Bethels , the houses of God ; in others there hath been the serving of divers lusts , and fellowship with Devils , and the unfruitful works of darkness , but in yours there hath been the serving of God , and a fellowship kept up with the Father and with his Son the Lord Jesus Christ. In a word , while other houses have been the Synagogues of Satan , yours have been the Temples of the Living God , and the Churches of Christ. As we do find godly Religious Families dignified in the Scriptures , and honoured with the illustrious name of Churches . Thus Paul , Rom. 16.3 . bids them greet Priscilla and Aquila his helpers in Christ Iesus ; and also verse 5. the Church that was in their house . And again in Col. 4.15 . He ordered them to salute Nymphas , and the Church that was in his house ; i. e. the Family which was Christian and Godly ; and besides their joyning together in Manual Labour and houshold business , did unite and joyn together in the Worship and Service of God. And I have read that in the last Century before this , the House of George Prince of Anhalt , for the good Orders that were observed therein , was said to be Ecclesia , a Church for the Religion in it , Academia , an University for the Learning in it , as well as Curia , a Court , for the grandure and state of it . And if you your selves are of God , and have in you any real goodness , it will be your comfort to have such Families also . The Apostle Iohn that beloved Disciple who lay in the bosom of our Lord , and there contracted an holy heat , in his Epistle to the Elect Lady , tells her , He rejoyced greatly when he found of her Children walking in the Truth . It must needs then be as great , if not a greater joy to you to see your own Children walking in the Truth . For you Fathers , to see the Children that you begat , and you Mothers , to see the Children that you brought forth , and that both of you brought up with so much care , and tenderness , and cost , walking with God , and going on Heaven-ward . The same blessed Apostle in his third Epistle which he sent to Gaius his Host , saith , I have no greater joy than to hear that my Children walk in Truth . By them he meant those that were his Spiritual Children , that he had begotten unto God by the Gospel . And it is indeed a very great comfort and joy to all the Faithful Ministers of Christ , to see that they have not run in vain , nor laboured in vain ; that the precious Seed which they have sown hath taken root in some of their Hearers hearts , so that they are turned to the Wisdom of the Just , and to the Faith of the Gospel , and brought over unto God , and then that there is not only an embracing of the Truth , but a walking in the Truth , a coming under the power of the Gospel , and a living up to the Rules of he Gospel ; a sound Conversion at the first , and ever after a suitable Conversation ; for in this Ministers have their great end , in this they have the Seal of their Ministry ; these persons are now their hope , and they will be their Ioy and Crown of rejoycing in the presence of our Lord Iesus Christ at his coming ; yea , for the present they are their Glory and Ioy ; 1 Thes. 2.19 , 20. Now I say , if this doth afford so much joy to godly Ministers , to see their Spiritual Children walking in the Truth , that they have no Joy in the World comparable to it ; surely we may conclude , that the Joy of gracious and holy Parents must needs equal , if not exceed it , when they see their Families , their Servants , especially their own natural Children walking in the Truth of God , and in the Waies of God , and chearfully engaging together with them in the Service of God , counting none of his Commands grievous , but his Yoke easie , and his Burden light . VII . The setting up of the Worship of God in your Families , and a faithful performance of Religious Duties there , is the way to prepare you for a dying well ; the way to die in peace , and with comfort , and with an holy confidence to resign up , and commit your Souls unto God as to a faithful Creator . He that hath walked with God in his integrity in this World , need not fear any evil , when the time is come for his walking in the Valley of the shadow of Death , for there God will be with him , and there his Rod and his Staff shall comfort him ; Psal. 23.4 . First ; You must die ; I need not tell you that for your information , though you have need to hear of it often for the promoting of your preparation . Too many put far away the evil day , though it be at the very door , and live as if they were to live always ; but the Scripture hath told us , It is appointed unto all men once to die ; Heb. 9.27 . This is God's Appointment , his Order and Decree which shall not be reversed ; what God hath appointed , man cannot avoid . We must all die once , and it is our great concern and wisdom to make sure that we shall not die twice , that over us the second death shall have no power ; that the first will , experience plainly proves . We see persons die , though at several Ages , and in various manners , yet one after another they drop into the Grave , which is the House for all the Living ; and when our turn comes , we also must among the rest take up our abode there until the Morning of the Resurrection . Now since we all must of necessity die , our business is to make as sure as we can of dying well . Many are for an easie death , but I would have you be for an happy death . It is indeed difficult and troublesom to croud thorow a strait and narrow Gate , but it is no great matter though you be pinched , and pained , and greatly put to it for a while , so that you find it an entrance into the glorious Kingdom of your God and Saviour . But then know , Secondly ; Those that neglect duty cannot rationally expect to die comfortably . How can they think to be admitted into the Joy of their Lord , who have been unfaithful in their little , and hid their Talents in a Napkin ? They that have lived without God in the World , and in the neglect of him , it will be very hard and unpleasant to them to think of departure hence , and going into the othe World , where if they have not God welcoming , delighting and satisfying them , they shall meet with nothing but misery and torments ; if they are not admitted into the bosom of his Love , they shall be thrown into the flames of his Wrath. How was it possible that the unprofitable Servant could look his Master in the face with any comfort ? he had all along hard thoughts of him , and in the end no hope of any good from him . He had been indeed intrusted with a Talent , but though he had not embezzeld and squandred it away , yet he buried it , it lay dead upon his hand , there was no improvement of it for his Masters Interest , and by that means he undid himself for ever . The losing of his time was no less than the losing of his Soul. Every one of you , my Friends , that is the Master or the Mistress of a Family , have a Talent committed to you by the great God , and for it you must be accountable ; there is a day coming wherein your Lord will reckon with his Servants ; what other Talents you have , of Knowledge , Gifts , Interest , Estate , and the like , you know best ; but for certain you have a Talent of Power and Authority put into your hands , you had need be very careful how you manage it ; let me ask you , what do you do with your Talent ? What do you do ? Ask your selves the question , if you do not serve your Generation according to the Will of God. If you do not Trade with your Talent for the honour and glory of God , you will be cast into outer darkness , where you shall have torment and sorrow enough ; here you had business enough which you would not do , there you shall have misery enough from which you shall not escape ; here you will not give glory to God in an holy activity for him , hereafter he will extort it from you in a way of Vindicative Justice ; if you will not apply your selves to praying and reading the holy Scriptures , with the teaching and instructing of your Children and Servants in the things of God , you may well tremble to think of fiery indignation , and of the dismal effects of it , weeping , and wailing , and gnashing of Teeth , which will be the portion of your Cup to all Eternity , unless you do seasonably repent , and reform , and make your peace with God , for what reason have they to promise themselves a comfortable Reward , who do now live in the neglect of their Duty . But then on the other side , Thirdly ; When your Hearts have been upright with God , and sound in his Statutes , and walked ( as David resolved to do ) within your Houses with a perfect Heart , and behaved your selves wisely in a perfect way ; then you need not tremble at the nearest approaches of the King of Terrours . It is indeed a solemn thing to die , and as it is a taking the compositum in pieces , as it is the parting of those two old Friends , the Soul and Body , which had lived together long in great intimacy , and close union , Nature startles at it , and they seldom are divided without an agony and struggling . But yet such a Person as I have now described need not fear , but as he can look back with comfort , so he may look forward with boldness , as Paul did , 2 Tim. 4.6 , 7 8. I am now ready to be offer'd , and the time of my departure is at hand . Well , Paul , thou art now ready to be gone , but what didst thou do while thou wast here ? I have fought a good fight , I have finished my course , I have kept the faith ; and what dost thou now please thy self with ? That hencefort there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness , which God the righteous Iudge will give unto me at that day ; and not to me only , but to all them that love his appearing ; and who are they that can love his appearing as a Iudge ? surely none but they that have been obedient to his commands , and done his work as he was their Lord and Master ; when you have served your Generation according to his Will , you may be as willing to fall asleep as a weary Man is at Night after a hard days labour , when he hath finished his work ; in short , when you have been faithful in your little , much more when you have been always abounding in the work of the Lord , you may be sure that your labour shall not be in vain , but you shall receive your reward , even that Gift of God which is Eternal Life . To this purpose I would have you consider two things . First ; The account our Lord and Saviour could give of himself , and what thereupon he did expect and ask of his Father . Both these we meet with in Iohn 17.4.5 . The account which he could give of himself was this , Father , I have glorified thee on earth , I have finished the work which thou gavest me to do . He glorified his Father in and by finishing his work . Now let it be your care and mine to tread in the steps of our Lord , and to write after so excellent a Copy set us by so great a Person , and so dear a Saviour ; though we cannot equal him , that is a thing impossible for us poor weak sinful Creatures to do , yet let us imitate him as much and as far as we can , and the good Lord help us so to do ; and if we will up and be doing God will be with us . Will you therefore endeavour it ? Oh do , glorifie God upon earth ; you have too much dishonour'd him by your sins against him , by your disobedience to him , by your preferring worthless trifles , broken cisterns , lying vanities before him ; mend now , and for the future make it your business to glorifie him ; you were made for that , it was the end of your Creation ; you were sent hither into the World for that , whatever other business your hand findeth here to do , this is the main and principal , this doth deserve and call for your best thoughts , and utmost diligence , and do you glorifie him by finishing the work which he hath given you to do . There is none of you , but God hath given work ; as he casts your Lines , and carves your Portions , so he hath cut out your work : I beseech you , study it , labour to know what it is ; and knowing it , mind it , set about it speedily without delay , and follow it close , neglect no part of it , but finish it as far as you are able ; you cannot do all , because so much of your time is already lost , and your strength is so much impair'd , and corruptions do so greatly clog you , and your spiritual and carnal Enemies will so resist and hinder you that you cannot do all you should , and will need pardon for your miscarriages and failings in what you do ; yet do all that you can , not only the work of your general Calling as you are Christians , but also the work of every particular place , station and relation in which the Divine Providence hath set you ; whether it be Civil or Ecclesiastick , Publick or Domestick . Art thou a Sheriff of Justice in the Countrey , a Mayor , Alderman , a Common-Council-Man or Constable in the City ? Do thou the duty of thy Place . Art thou a Minister of the Gospel ? Do thou thine . Preach the Word , be instant in Season and out of Season ; art thou a Child , a Servant ? Be thou obedient , industrious , faithful : art thou an Husband , a Wife , a Parent , a Master or Mistress , the Head and Governour of a Family ? Do thou thine . Walk within thy House with a perfect Heart , rule in the fear of God. He that is not good in his Relation , is not good at all ; he that is not a good Husband , a good Master , is not a good Man ; much of the power of godliness doth consist and discover it self in the performance of Relative Duties , See then that much of your care be employed about this , and see that your places be not empty of Duty , nor your Families void of Religion . Now observe what our Savior did hereupon expect and say , Father glorifie th●u me with thy own self : Here hath been my work , where now is my glory ? So when you have finished the work which God gave you to do , when you have walked with God , and lived to God , when you have improved your Interest , your Power , and your All for God , then you may say , Father do thou accept of me , and receive me , and glorifie thou me , my work is done , now let me have my rest , always remembring that you are not to expect this upon the score of Merit , but only as a Reward of Grace ; for our Lord hath taught us to call our selves unprofitable Servants , when we have done all that is commanded us ; what are we then now we fall so short , and perfect not one piece of work that is put into our hands ? Secondly ; Consider that good account which the Prophet gives of those good Men whom after a Life of Service God takes away from hence ; would you know what becomes of them , whither it is that they go , into what state they are put ? He tells you , Isa. 57.2 . They enter into peace , they rest in their beds , every one walking in his uprightness , i. e. every one having walked in his uprightness while he was here ; they professed Religion , and were true to that Profession ; they owned the Interest of God , yea , and to their power they served that Interest ; they have studied uprightness and integrity ; they have been faithful to God in their Generation , and in their several places , and when such do come to die , they have no reason to be afraid of dying , no reason for them to draw back , and be unwilling to go ; say to them it shall be well with them , they shall enter into peace , into a compleat and perfect peace ; they shall live in peace , and enjoy themselves in peace , they were here sometimes fear round about , buth henceforth they shall be peace round about , and they shall rest in their Beds . Poor hearts ! they had but a little rest while they were here , a great many fears , and a great deal of care , and but a little rest ; alas ! it was broken and disturbed by Enemies without , and by Sins within ; Head and Heart were discompos'd and out of order , at sometimes there is no soundness in their flesh , nor rest in their bones , Psal. 38.3 . But when once Death hath cast them into their last sleep , they shall have placidam quietem , a sweet and pleasant rest ; their Bodies for a time , and but for a time , in a Bed of Dust , for that is not intended for the place of their abode , they only Inn there by the way , yet it is made easie for them , and safe , and perfum'd , for it is the place where the Lord himself lay ; but their precious and immortal Souls shall rest for ever in a Bed of Spices , in a Bed of Love , in the Bosom of Abraham , in the Arms of Jesus , Rev. 14.13 . Blessed are the dead that die in the Lord ; not only the Martyrs that die for him , but all Believers that die in him , in the Faith of Christ , in obedience to him , in a state of Union to him , and Communion with him , for their works do follow them , all their works of Charity , and all their works of Piety , all the good they have done abroad in the World , and all the good they have done at home in their Families , none shall be forgotten , none dropt nor lost by the way , but all shall follow them , and in Heaven meet them in great , glorious and inconceivable Rewards , so that the Lord Jesus shall be both glorified in them , and admired by them . VIII . You having made it your work and business to serve and worship God in and with your Families , and brought them cheerfully to join with you therein , you may leave them with the far greater hope , and by consequence with the greater comfort . And while they are mourning , and sighing , and weeping , because they must now part with you ; yet you may be glad and rejoice , because hereafter you shall meet with them in a better place and state ; and here again take into your Consideration these few things . First ; That all these things must be dissolved . You now see it is so as to many of these things , and believe it will be so as to all the rest . Death doth travel up and down , and mows people down apace , and will pursue his bloody work till he had snapt asunder the nearest and dearest Relations , broken up all Houses , and put an end to Families . It would not by wise persons be counted incongruous at a Marriage-feast to have a Death's-head set upon the Board , nor to dash your sweetest Contentments and Delights with dying Thoughts ; think , my Friend , often think that Husbands and Wives must part , the Conjugal Knot shall be loosed , Parents and Children must part , sooner or later , but how soon none of us do know ; the great God , in whose Hand our Times are , that lock'd that up among his Treasures , and no Man hath a Key to let him into the knowledge of it ; the certainty of the thing doth engage us to diligence , and our ignorance of the time is a strong Argument for our doubling of that diligence . Secondly ; That will be a very sad parting which will be in despair . As they must needs mourn bitterly who mourn without hope ; so they must needs die dismally who die without hope ; and what can be thought more likely than that such will be the death of those , who in the days of their Health and Prosperity have forgotten God , and liv'd without him in the World , who have made it their work to sin together , and to dishonour God together , and profane his Name and abuse his good Creatures together ? If these believe there is a God , and a Resurrection , and a Judgment to come , in which all Persons shall receive according to what they have done in the Body , whether it be good , or whether it be evil , they may have such thoughts as these forcibly breaking in upon them . I and my Family , after we have lain a while and slept in the Dust , shall rise again , and we shall meet again , but where ? Oh where shall we meet ? We shall meet at the Judgment Seat of Christ , there to hear that Condemning Sentence pronounced upon us , Go ye cursed : we shall meet in Hell , where we must make our Eternal abode ; we shall meet in Torments , which will be both intolerable and eternal , that so as we have sinned together , we may smart together , and burn together in the Lake of Fire and Brimstone , and that which will render these thoughts more grievous and painful to them may be this ; that their Children and Servants coming thither will be the aggravation of their own misery , since they were so much the cause of it , which as some think was the great , nay only reason why the rich Glutton , ( of whom you read in Luke 16. ) being in Hell was so unwilling that his Five Brethren should come into that place of Torments ; it was not out of good nature , and love to them , for there is no such thing in Hell , it was not out of a desire to prevent their misery , but the aggravating of his won , he having contributed so much to their ruin and destruction by his vile and wicked Example . But then , Thirdly ; Those of you who can at a dying hour look upon your Relations as having walked with you in the ways of God , likely to follow you into a blessed Eternity , may leave them with joy . All of you that have made God your choice , and his glory your end , that have made Religion your principal business , and Family-duty your work , and been constant in the dispatch of it , you may part with comfort , and leave one another with joy ; though there will be a shower , Bowels will yearn , and Love will melt the Heart , and make it drop Tears , yet there need be no storm within ; you that are Parents may commit them to God , whom you brought up for him , and so rejoice in hope that though you leave them behind you , yet they will not leave that God to whom you are going ; but though they stay behind in a wicked World , which is full of snares and dangers , bad Company , bad Examples and Temptations , yet since you have by Faith and Prayer committed them to him , they shall graciously be kept by his power , through Faith unto Salvation ; and that the Counsels you have given have made an abiding impression upon them ; and the Seed which you have sown shall not be lost , but spring up and bring forth fruit , and when you are dead and gone they will continue and proceed to practice as they have been taught , and they will know , love , and fear the God of their Fathers , and serve him with a perfect Heart and a willing Mind ; you may hope , that of all that which hath been by you said and done something will stick . The Heathen could say , Quo semel est imbut a recens servabit odorem Testa diu — A new Vessel will for a great while retain the scent or savour of that Liquor which was at first put into it ; and so young ones : and I am apt to think that many of those who after a pious Education turn aside from the good ways of God to crooked paths with the workers of iniquity do not sin at so easie a rate as others do , but offer violence to their Consciences , and call to mind again that of God himself concerning Abraham and his House , which I have already quoted more than once ; He will teach his children , and his houshold after him , and they shall keep the way of the Lord. His Instructions will infuse such Principles into them , that they will do it , and my Grace shall so powerfully co-operate with those Principles , and influence them that they shall do it . They shall keep the way of the Lord , the way of his holy Precepts , and the way of his instituted Worship ; they shall do it after him , after his example , and after his decease , when he is dead and in his Grave ; my fear and service shall be posteritiz'd in his Family . Abraham's advice and practice shall live in their Minds , and Religion shall live in their Houses , and so it did in Isaac's , and in Iacob's , and so down . and further for the strengthening of this your hope , I desire you to take along with you that passage of Solomon , Prov. 22.6 . Train up a child in the way that he should go , and when he is old he will not depart from it ▪ The Scripture sets it the next Door to an impossibility for them to learn to do well who have been accustomed to do evil ; and though it be not so hard , yet it is not very easie for them to do evil who have been all along accustomed to the doing of that which is good . Zophar speaking of the wicked Man , saith , Iob 20.11 . His bones are full of the sins of his youth , which shall lye down with him in the dust ; which Gregory expounds thus , Usque ad pulverem non deserunt ; i. e. usque ad mortem ab iniquitate non cessat : He doth not forsake his Vices as long as he lives , he doth not cease from them till he dies , his youthful sins stick close , fast to him ; he continues the practice of them while he lives , and when he dies he receives the punishment of them . It is a matter of greatest moment to take heed what we do accustom young ones to ; teach Children that which is good at first , and they will learn it well , and that is the way to have them keep it well . It is reported of the Harts in Scythia , that they do betimes teach their young ones to leap from Turf to Turf , and from Bank to Bank , and from Rock to Rock , and so they continue it when they come to be old , and by means thereof they cannot be taken though they be hunted , whether that be so or not is none of my Enquiries ; sure I am , teaching Children their Duty toward God , and going before them , and with them in the performance of it , is the way to engage them to a perseverance therein , and to secure them from the great Nimrod of Hell , that cruel and bloody Hunter of precious Souls : so that they shall not afterwards be drawn away from it by the wiles , subtilties and temptations of that wicked one , nor seduced by the bad examples of evil Men , who know not the Lord. Do you by your Teachings and Instructions lay up the words of Gods Mouth in their Heads , so through Divine Grace they may come to lay them up in their Hearts , and then they will be preserved from sinning against God , and kept from the paths of the Destroyer . And as an happy consequence hereof , You may at your departure from hence leave them with a comfortable hope of meeting them again with mutual and exceeding joy in the other World , in a better place , and in a far better case than that is in which you leave them ; when all troubles shall be removed from the Flesh , and all corruption from the Spirit , when there shall be nothing within to disturb , and nothing without to offend , but you and they shall have a spotless Purity , and blessed Eternity . You shall be raised out of your Graves in which you have had so sound and long a sleep , and stand upon the Earth , and be caught up together with the rest of the holy Ones into the Clouds to meet the Lord in the Air , and so shall you ever be with the Lord , and O the joys that will be at that meeting ! The meeting of the Bridegroom with the Bride is not to be compared with it ; the meeting of the Father with his penitent and returning Prodigal falls short of it ; Oh the Smiles , the inward Satisfactions , the dear Embraces , the loud Triumphs , the Hosannahs and Allelujahs that will be at that meeting ! All which will arise from the condition you meet together in , freed from sin , and from imperfections , deliver'd from all your Enemies , having got the last of them Conquer'd , and now under your Feet ; yourselves being in a state of safety , peace , and acceptance with God ; and also it will arise from the thoughts and considerations of that which you then meet together for . It is for the greatest purposes , and most glorious ends that can be ; you meet to receive the Reward of all your services , and of all your sufferings , the answer of all your Prayers , the accomplishment of all your desires , the fulfilling of all your hopes ; you shall meet the Bridegroom , whom though you had not seen , yet believing you chose , and lov'd , and were espoused to , and between him and you there shall be everlasting Nuptials ; you shall meet together to take possession of that incorruptible undefiled Inheritance which fadeth not away , but is reserved in Heaven , of which you were new-born the Heirs ; you shall meet to see , and together enjoy that God in Heaven whom you served upon Earth , to Sun your selves in his Beams , to solace your selves in his Arms , to Delight your selves in that fulness of Joy which is in his presence , and to bathe your selves in that River , or rather Ocean of Pleasures which is at his Right Hand for evermore . You that have walked in the same way shall come to the City of God , the heavenly Ierusalem , of which the Lord and the Lamb are , will be the everlasting light ; and having set your Hand to the work of God , and having had your Heart in it , you shall enter into the same rest . You that have mourned together , and together mingled your Groans and Tears , and poured out bitter Complaints against your Sins and your Selves , shall then rejoice together , and that with exceeding Joy , because of your own and each others thorough Cure , and perfect Health . You that have confest your faults together , both Heart and Life-sins , shall then be deliver'd from them , and triumph over them all . You that have prayed together upon Earth , and with all the power of your Souls Besieged the Throne of Grace , shall in Heaven sing praises together , even Eternall Allelujahs , and to make the Consort compleat , and that melodious Harmony the more ravishing , you shall be joined with an innumerable Company of Angels , and all the Saints that were Redeemed unto God by the Blood of the Lamb. Oh! how deliciously sweet will it be to your Souls who have been the Father of a gracious Family , or the Mother of it , if at the last and great day , when the whole World shall be summon'd to appear , and give up their account to God , you shall be able to say , Lord here am I , and the Children which thou hast given me ; these thou gavest to me in thy goodness , and these I gave up to thee in Covenant , and accordingly I brought them up for thee ; I am not ashamed to own them for mine , and I trust that in Christ thou wilt be graciously pleased to call them thine , now thou art making up thy Jewels ; these I did carefully teach thy fear , and did also lead them in the way that thou didst chuse , and they were willing to learn , and ready to follow : they were my hope , when but little , and my comfort when grown up , and now , Lord , we present our selves before thee in hope of being accepted by thee , and finding favour ; and then our Lord Jesus shall look upon you with a gracious Eye , and say , I know you , you are some of my old Friends and Acquaintance , you did rejoice and work Righteousness , and remembred me in my ways , and in those ways I did meet with you ; Come ye blessed of my Father , you are welcome to me , and you will be so to him , inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world , you have been industrious seekers , and now you shall be successful and happy finders ; you have been running the Race , now you shall receive the Prize ; you have been sowing in Prayers , and Tears , and a Consciencious performance of Duty , and now you shall with joy reap the Harvest , your Faith shall be swallowed up of Vision , and your Hope of Fruition . This is no more , my dearly Beloved , than what you , and such as you may with good ground hope for , and live in the joyful expectation of , and the lively hope of it may very well allay the bitterness of Death , and afford you that comfort , which may through Christ keep your Souls in perfect peace , even when you are in the greatest agonies and strugglings with the King of Terrors . When you are ready to draw your latest Breath , and to bid farewel to all the world , and to set up your Sails for the other world , and to shoot the Gulf , your Conscience can bear you witness that you have heartily submitted your selves to God , and believingly closed with the Lord Iesus Christ , renouncing all confidence in the Flesh , and making mention of his Righteousness as that only by which you must be justified ; yet that you have not had an idle and unactive Faith , but endeavoured to walk in all the Ordinances and Commandments of the Lord blameless , and that you have been sincerely desirous to improve your interest and power for the honour of God , and accordingly have order'd and brought up your Family for him , and so have spent your time together in his fear and service : I say , you may hereupon chearfully commit your own Souls to him as to a faithful Creator , and also your Children to him ; them you may leave in his Hand as the proper Objects of his Covenant Love , and Fatherly Care , hoping that you shall meet again in his Blessed Presence , and live for ever in his Kingdom and Glory . You see I have brought from your selves , you that are Masters , Mistresses , Parents , Heads and Governours of Families , Eight Arguments for your setting and keeping up in them the Worship of God , and Religious Exercises , and upon every one of them I have insisted long , and enlarged much ▪ that if it be possible I might convince your Judgments , and work upon your hearts and affections . Now the question is , what you think of , and say to these things . For mine own part , though I do not , and hope never shall overvalue any of my own labours , yet I would set a great estimate and high price upon all the truths , of which I am sure these things which I have brought to you are some , how much soever they may taste of the Earthen Vessel in which they come to you , yet know assuredly they are of God. And let me add , it is a common Saying and a true one , that Interest governs the World ; though it is no less common and true , that men are greatly mistaken about their real and grand interest , placing it where it is not . But I say , if your own interest have any place and power with you , if you would secure and promote it , you will find not only good but abundant reason for the doing of that which I am pressing upon you . viz. Setting up the Worship of God in your Families . And if any of you have hitherto been strangers to it , I earnestly beseech you to shew your selves persons of teachable and tractable Spirits , easie to be intreated , and evidently to manifest your fear of God , and love to your selves , by your speedy doing it ; take not up with some inclinations towards it , or good purposes or resolutions for the future , but up and be doing , fall presently to practice for Gods sake , and for your own sake , and for your Families sake do not defer and put off , do not say you will do it afterward , for though that should stop the mouth of a sleeping lazie Conscience , it will by no means please an holy God. Besides , that is no other than a wretched fallacy , and base cheat , that a malicious Devil and a treacherous deceitful heart would put upon you ; that Old Saying carrieth a great truth in it . Qui non est hodie , cras minus aptus erit . He that is not fit and willing to day , will be more unfit and unwilling to morrow ; Convictions will wear off , and the heart will grow harder , and corruption stronger , and the Devil will clap the faster hold , and the Spirit of God may withdraw and move no farther ; strive no more , and where are you then ? Thou saidst , seek ye my face , and my heart answered , thy face Lord will I seek . So David , here was a sudden compliance , he did not stand arguing and questioning , he did not take time , but immediately arose and girded himself to the work . O! that it may be so with you , strike Man , Woman , strike while the iron is hot , as soon as the wind blows spread your Sails . I beg of you , yea , with utmost importunity I beg , that you would go home to day and do it , do not dare to lie down in your Beds this night without the performance of Family-duty , considering that it is Duty which I am calling you to ▪ it is not a thing indifferent . I do not think it worth my while to contend for matters of that nature , but this is none of them , this is not a point of liberty , no , no , it is Duty , and Duty must be done , Duty is Debt , you owe it to God , to your Families , and Debts must be paid , otherwise Divine Justice will Arrest you , and you shall answer for it . Now , seeing it must be done , the sooner it is done the better , you do not know how soon you may die , it may be too night , and I am sure it is best and safest for you , that when ever Death comes , it should find Faith in you , and you in the way of your Duty . Blessed , for ever blessed is that Servant , whom when his Lord cometh he shall find so doing . But I shall now proceed ( as indeed it is high time ) to a third head of Arguments , drawn from your Children , who are near , and ought to be dear to you , unto whom you were in the hand of God Instruments of conveying life and being . Children that are parts of your selves , that are your selves in a second Edition , whose welfare therefore and happiness you are by all imaginable bonds obliged while you live to study , and promote even as your own . They likewise will in part be drawn from your Servants , particularly your Apprentices , who are under your roof , and committed to your care , and imployed for some time in your service , and about your work . And here I desire you seriously to ponder upon these following Particulars , and to lay them close unto your hearts , and wisely judge what there is of strength in them , what a rational inforcement of this holy practice upon you . 1. Think with your selves what they are by Nature , both your Children , and your Servants , more particularly your Children , because the nearness of the Relation doth strengthen the engagement upon you . And here we will consider them both as to their Bodies , and their Souls , and that in three Particulars . We will begin with their Bodies , and outward Man , which are indeed but dust , but the Workmanship of Gods hands wonderfully made . now First , Some of them peradventure are objects of pity in the eyes of all that behold them , some are defective and imperfect , an integrating part is missing , others of them are crooked , or their Members are misplac'd , or very much deformed ; so that Spectators turn away their faces from them , as from loathsom and odious Creatures , not fit to be exposed to the sight of any ; others of them are lame in their hands , or feet , one or both , or blind ; others of them came excellent out of the hands of God , and the wombs of their Mothers , but since a disease hath seised them , as the Small Pox , or the Scrofulous Humour , which have made sad work in them , and utterly defac'd their Beauty , digging pits and making seams in their faces , distorting their mouths , eating off a finger from this hand , and another from that , and so devouring them by piece-meal . Now let me ask you , is not this enough to draw out your compassions toward them , and to cause the sounding of your Bowels ; could you be content that there should be no sound part in them , but all throughout nothing but botches and boyls , and putrifying Sores ; would you have their Souls as bad as their Bodies ? would you be content that they should have ignorant blind Souls , crooked and perverse Souls , ugly filthy and deformed Souls ; that as nice and curious Persons cannot abide to look upon them ; so the great and holy God should not endure to look upon them neither , but say , cast them out of my sight , my mind cannot be towards them . Methinks you should bestir your selves to the utmost , and do all that in you lies , that the loveliness of their Souls may compensate and make an abundant amends for the deformity of their Bodies ; look out for the best Beauty for them , that Wisdom , and Grace , and Holiness may make even their faces to shine ; yea , that their beauty may be perfect , through Christs comeliness put upon them . But Secondly , There be some of your Children which are amiable and pleasant to behold , curious pieces of God's Work : Sons that are Plants of Renown , and Daughters as Corner-Stones polished , after the similitude of a Palace , as you read in Psal. 144.12 . They have bodies of a comely stature and exact shape , Limbs of a due proportion . Countenances lovely and lively , in which you see excellent Features and admirable Complexion ; the Lilly and the Rose having met , and concurr'd to render them accepted and desirable in the eyes of men , and certainly this is a great Mercy , for which you and they have cause to bless God , only let them have a care they do not abuse it to Pride and Wantonness . Besides this fair out-side , this well-built Tabernacle of Clay , they are inwardly adorned with good Tempers , smart , brisk and exquisite Parts , which greatly accomplish them and render them fit for Converse , so that all who know them are delighted with their Conversation . And now sit down , yet Parents , sit down and consider , is it not a thousand pitties that such Tabernacles should stand empty , or be possess'd with an evil Spirit ? Is it not pity such Bodies should have in them wicked and vile Souls ; that those lovely persons , who have so much without to commend them to Men , should have nothing within to commend them to God ? Would it not be sad , if these Persons , who have almost Angelical Countenances , should be no other than Cages of unclean Lusts , Sinks of Sin , Habitations of Divels , meer painted Sepulchres , fair to the eyes , but within there is nothing but filth , rottenness and a stink ? Oh , how much better is it for them to resemble and take pattern by the King's Daughter , mentioned Psal. 45.13 . who hath not only her garments of wrought gold , but is likewise all glorious within . This is the way for them to become precious in God's sight , and honourable ; this is the way for Jesus the Lord of Glory and King of Saints greatly to desire their Beauty , though he himself is the cheifest of ten thousands , and deserves to be the Desire of all Nations . And then , Thirdly , let your Children be what they will as to the outward man , fair or black , compleat or defective , beautiful or deformed , what are they as to their Souls ? the very best part about them is stark naught , indeed it is the very worst ; that which David called his Glory , and should be theirs , is their Shame ; alas there is cause enough why it should be so . Be they as lovely as you think them , they are not Paradises , but Desarts and Wildernesses over-run with Briars , Thorns , and Weeds , not Cedars but Brambles ; by nature they are Crab-stocks , and is it not pity but they should be grafted upon with holy Instructions , and religious Principles ? that so , instead of wild grapes , the grapes of Sodom , and the clusters of Gomorrha , they may become Trees of Righteousness , the planting of the Lord , that by them he might be glorified , which will also turn to their own singular Advantage ; for having their Fruit unto Holiness , the end will be everlasting Life ; for such Trees when their bearing-time is come to its appointed Period , will be sound not Fewel for the Burning , but Timber for the Building ; or , if you please , Death shall take them , and Grace transplant them into the Paradise of God. You that are Parents and have beautiful Children , look upon them with a great deal of Pleasure ; you look and like , you look and doat , you see your selves in them , and several curious strokes and pretty tricks , and all these please you highly . But I remember when Samuel was greatly taken with Eliah , 2 Sam. 16.7 . the Lord said unto him , Look not on his countenance or on the heighth of his stature , because I have refused him . So say I ; do not look upon this or that natural or acquired Excellency in your Children so as to rest satisfied with that ; but see if you can discover any thing of Christ in them , any thing of a new and divine Nature ; as for their natural state you will see in them more of the brute than of the man , if you do but look upon them through a Scripture-glass ; that will help you to the best prospect . To this purpose let us make use of that which we find in Iob 11.12 . Vain man would be wise , though man be born like the wild asses colt . In which words there are three things worthy of our observing ; what Man is , what he would be , and what he was born . First , what man is ; vain , proud man , conceited man , but still vain man. In the Hebrew it is empty man. Indeed sometimes he makes a great noise , but there is little worth : He hath nothing in him , nothing of value , much froth , much wind , but no substance ; he hath too much of that which he should not have , Sin , Satan , Folly , Madness , Madness is in the heart of man whilst he lives , but there is nothing of that which he should have , nothing of that beautiful Image which was at first stamp'd upon him , nothing of that primitive Glory with which he did at the first shine , nothing of that real Excellency and Beauty which our gracious and blessed Redeemer came to advance him to ; he hath nothing of the saving Knowledge of God , but his foolish Heart is darkned , and he become vain in his Imaginations : nothing of the divine Spirit , but sensual , not having the Spirit , sunk into the Flesh , immers'd , drown'd in Flesh , nothing of sanctifying Grace , nothing is made new , but all old and rotten , wholly alienated from the Life of God , dead in Trespasses and Sins ; there is in him no Love to God , no Faith in Jesus Christ , but altogether throughout filthy and abominable . Again , Secondly , there we see what Man would be , wise . Vain Man would be wise ; but , perhaps , you will say , this is well , it is very good , it is a sign he is not altogether empty . Here is a Will that stands right , Desires directed to a proper and deserving object . But mark what is the meaning of the Words , take it in these two things : He would be wise , i e he affects a shew and appearance of Wisdom , and if he can attain that , he concludes he hath enough . He doth not care so much for being wise , as for being counted wise ; he is wise in his own conceit , and in his own eyes , and he would be so in the opinion of all that know him . It is evident he does not care for Wisdom it self , because he doth neither pray , nor take pains , for it ; he doth not dig for it as for Silver , nor doth he seek and search for it as for hid Treasures . But whatever he now would be , or be thought to be ▪ what was he at first , what when he came into the World ? Zophar tells us , Thirdly , He is born as a wild asses colt . What a strange Climax or Gradation is here ? He is born a Colt , that is , at best , a Brute , be it never so handsom or well made , yet is no other than a Beast , and hath not the Understanding of a Man ; but that is not all , he is born an Asses colt , a dull , heavy and foolish Creature , good , fit , for nothing ; nor is that all , he is born a wild Asses colt , the dullest and most untractable Creature ; so of all Fools , Man is the worst and most sottish . Thus the Scripture speaks , Isai. 1. The ox knoweth his owner , and the ass his masters crib ; but Israel doth not know , my people doth not consider . And again , Ier. 7. The Stork in the heaven knoweth her appointed season ; and the Turtle , and the Crane , and the Swallow observe the times of their coming , but my people know not the Iudgment of the Lord. Now then I will leave it to you , O Parents , to Judge , whether you have not need betimes to break these Colts , if you would have them come to good ; have you not need to take a great deal of pains with these Asses , and the taming of these wild Asses . Is there not reason why you should do what you can to bring them to bear the yoke in their Youth , and to draw in it . I mean not only your yoke , but Christs too , which is easie , and none of his Commandments grievous ; and so to turn these Beasts into Men , yea , into Saints ; certainly you should , because they are yours , and if you love them you will ; natural affection accompanied with religious Principles , will put you upon all diligent use of means to so blessed a purpose , viz. Bringing them out constantly to the publick Ordinances , and at home taking care to pray for them , and with them , and to instruct , command , exhort and catechize them , together with the setting before them holy and good examples . II. Add this Consideration to the former , How much you have contributed to their corruption and defilement , they are indeed degenerate Plants , but the Plants of a strange Vine , and that is you , Ier. 2.21 . Now here I will consider you both as Parents , and how much your Children are the worse for you , and as Masters , and so how much your Families do suffer by you . First , you are Parents , God hath crowned your Conjugal Relation with Posterity , but what is your Posterity but the Seed of evil doers , Children of those that have corrupted themselves ? those pure Souls which were created by God , were polluted and spoiled as soon as they entered into those bodies that came of you ; you did convey a cross , froward depraved nature to your Children , who therefore are so bad because they are yours . It is said , Gen. 5.3 . Adam begat a Son in his Image , and after his likeness , not in the Image and likeness of God , as Adam himself had been made at first , but in his own Image , in his Image not only as he was Man , but also as he was lapsed Man , his Son was like himself in Body and in Soul , and in Sin , and thus have the Sons of Adam done ever since . Iob saith , Iob 14.4 . Who can bring a clean thing out of an unclean ? Man being unclean , cannot make himself clean , let them wash in tears , let them wash with Snow water , he cannot fetch out the dirt , the spots and stains ▪ he cannot wash himself clean ; and being himself unclean , he cannot produce and bring forth that which is clean . That which is born of the flesh is flesh ; weak flesh , sinful flesh ; that water which is soil'd and muddied at the Spring , cannot be pure and clear in the Stream . Aethiopissae Filius nigrum ab eâ Colorem trahit . The Son of a Blackmoor will be a Blackmoor too . You know there are hereditary Diseases , as the Gout , Stone , Spleen , Lethargie , which commonly run in the blood , and are transmitted by the Parents to their Children ; Sin is one of them , it is the worst of them , it sticks close , and descends from Parents to Children , and that from Generation to Generation , without interruption , without exception , unless that of our dear Lord Jesus , who was to be holy , harmless , undefiled , and separate from Sinners , that he might be a Sacrifice , and a Saviour , and in order thereunto , came into the World in an extraordinary way of generation , being formed in the Womb of a Virgin , by the power of the Holy Ghost who over-shadowed her ; otherwise Sin doth inseparably follow Nature , and never goeth out of the blood . So that I may call Parents the Channels , the Kennels , the Common-Sewers , in and through which all that abominable filth runs , which defiles their otherwise lovely and desirable Children , rendring them odious and abominable unto God. And never carry your heads high , because your Children are of a Noble or Gentile descent , come of such a Family , bear such account , or because you can leave them a great Estate , there is one thing , alass ! that stains and spoils all that Glory , viz. It is from you they have it that they are born Sinners . And truly , as there is a great deal of joy at the birth of an Infant , because a Man-Child is Born into the World ; so there is reason why that joy should be upon this account somewhat allay'd , and mingled with grief and sorrow , that a Sinner is born into the World. Secondly , Let us consider you as the Heads & Governours of Families ; are not your Families the worse for you ? you that are Husbands and Wives should be the better for one another , and fill your Relations , and carry in your places as those that are Co-heirs of the grace of life , that you may have cause of blessing God you ever came together . But reflect and curiously enquire , are not you the worse for one another , and are not your Children and Servants in some respects the worse for you both ? You that have no Religious Duties performed in your Houses , are for certain very injurious to them , by that your omission ; for you teach them Atheism , neglect and contempt of God ; you teach them to live without God in the World , like so many Brutes ; you do thereby teach them to neglect their precious and immortal Souls , and to mind nothing but the concernments of a vile and perishing Body , and the inferiour good things of a Transitory World : But what do you think of your selves who are the best , who walk most closely with God ; do you foot it so right that you do not sometimes tread awrie ? do you demean your selves with so much exactness , that nothing amiss is to be discerned in you ? do you order your carriages and conversations with so much judgement and circumspection , that they are without fault , and blameless . David saith , Who can understand his errours ? and , if thou , Lord , shouldest mark iniquities , O Lord , who shall stand ? and have you not read such passages as these in the Scriptures ? There is not a just Man upon Earth that liveth and sinneth not . In many things we sin all . If we say we have no sin , we deceive our selves , and the truth is not in us . There are too many graceless Persons in the World , but there is not one sinless Person ; there are many holy Persons who have been washed , and justified , and sanctified , but not one that is cleansed from all filthiness both of Flesh and Spirit , and who hath attained to a perfection in his holiness , and can you think that your blemishes and miscarriages are invisible ? do not those that live and converse with you observe you ? yes , they do , and see more spots in your faces than you do in your own , though you look in the glass ; and they will be exceeding apt to tread in your steps , and to imitate you , especially in that which is evil , for unto that their own corrupt Nature doth incline , and like a strong Bias carry them that way ; yea , and your example shall be made use of and pleaded as their sufficient Warrant . If they should be reproved by some sober judicious Persons for doing that which they should not , they will justifie themselves thus ; I saw my Father or my Mother do so , my Master or my Mistress do so , and therefore I may do it too . Poor things , they do sometimes think of their Parents , and Masters above that which is meet , and not considering their imperfections , and that body of Sin and Death which they carry about with them ; they do not in their following them make use of that caution which they ought to do . Be serious , my dear Friends , be serious and consider whether your Children and Servants be not the worse for your Pride , discovered in your haughty looks , and lofty words , and stately gestures , and costly garbs and dresses ; the worse for your Passion , shewn in sharpened Eyes , furious Countenances , and words like Swords and Daggers ; the worse for your mispence of time , in vain visits , frothy discourses , games and recreations , and lazy lying in Bed upon the Lord's Day , till much of the morning is lost , and a considerable part of the Publick Worship be over before you come into the Congregation . In short , are they not the worse for this , and that , and the other ; yea for many things , which your own Consciences ( if you please to consult them , and give them free leave to speak ) can and will inform you of far better than I can , being every day with you , and in you , and keeping a Book of Accounts , in which is inserted and recorded what it observes . Now then , ought you not to repair this damage to your utmost ? and since you have done , and go on to do them so much hurt , should you not do them all the good you can , and be heartily glad when it is in your power to do it ? have you shewn them many things by which they have offended God ? and will you not shew them by counsel and practice those things that will please him ? I beseech you to bestir and lay out your selves and your all for the making of them amends , and the recovering them out of that Snare of the Devil into which you have helpt to bring them . In what I now say , I do not put you upon impossibilities , nor the doing of that which is without the reach of your power . I do not bid you sanctifie them by forming Christ , and planting Grace in their hearts . I do not bid you raise them out of the Grave of Corruption , and breath into their Souls the Breath of Spiritual Life ; that must be effected by the Arm of Omnipotency ; none else can do it , none hath a Regenerating Power , but he that hath a Creating Power ; but you may pray for them in your private Retirements , and you may pray with them that God would be pleased to give them his Spirit , and to work his Grace in them : You may take your Children and your Servants with you , and carry them to God , and beg of him that he would pity and help them . As you read , when our Lord Iesus was here upon Earth , Tabernacling among Men , they came to him from all parts of the Land , begging of him a Cure for themselves , and their Children and their Servants , as the matter did require . Now Christ is in Heaven , he hath the same power , that you must needs believe and grant ; for here he was in his State of lowest Humiliation , there he is in his State of highest Preferment and Exaltation . After his Resurrection he told his Disciples , all Power was given him both in Heaven and Earth , and distance of place doth not hinder . He can help afar off as well as at hand , his Arm being long as well as strong . There is no need of this great Physician leaving his Fathers Right Hand , and coming down in Person to cure Diseased Souls ; by sending his Word he can heal them , as he did formerly ; Psal. 107. v. 20. And his Glory hath not in the least detracted from his Mercy . His Heart is now what it was , as loving and tender ; his Bowels are not shrunk up , nor do his Compassions fail . Iesus Christ is the same , yesterday , and to day , and for ever ; Heb. 13.8 . As his Hand of Power is not shortened , so his gracious Ear is not grown heavy ; therefore go to him , taking Faith along with you , and say , Lord , my Children were born blind , O! do thou anoint them with thine Eye-salve , that they may receive their sight . Open their Eyes that they may see wonderful things out of thy Law , and the precious things of thy Gospel ; that they may see the sinfulness of Sin , and the beauty of Holiness ; that they may see their own undone condition , and the absolute need they have of Christ , together with the all-sufficiency of his Righteousness , and the riches of his Grace , the sweetness of his Government , and the easiness of his Yoke . Go to him and say , Lord , my Children are grievously troubled with a Devil , a proud Devil , a lying Devil , a disobedient , stubborn , obstinate Devil , O that thou wouldest make thy Power known in the casting of him out ! Once more , go to him and say , Lord , My Children have got the Leprosie of Sin , it hath spread it self all over them : O do thou say , I will be ye clean . My Children are Enemies in their Minds by wicked works , Enemies to Thee and all that is spiritually good , O do thou reconcile them ! that of Enemies to Thee they may become Enemies to Sin , and for the time to come they may love thy Father , thy Self and Spirit , thy Truth and Ways . Lord , My Children are the Slaves of Satan , and they delight in their Chain ; they serve divers Lusts , and are pleased with their Bondage , and count their Drudgery a Recreation . O! let these Lawful Captives of the Mighty be delivered , break their Chains asunder , and bring them into the Liberty of thy Children , and , as they have yielded their members Servants to uncleanness , and to iniquity , unto iniquity , even so now and for the time to come they may yield their members , Servants to righteousness unto holiness ; Rom. 6.20 . And what you do to this purpose for your Children , do also for your Servants ; take them up in the Arms of your Love and Prayer , and lay them at the foot of God , and beg him that he would sanctifie and save them . And as you can thus pray and plead with God for them , so you can add hereunto if you will. There are other things which you can do : You cannot infuse into them a Principle of Grace , but you may teach them the Principles of Religion ; you may shew the way in which they should walk , though you cannot put that way in their hearts ; as we have that expression ; Psal. 84.5 . Blessed is the man whose strength is in Thee , in whose heart are the ways of them . You cannot bow their Wills to God's , nor raise and spiritualize their Affections , nor set them upon their proper Objects , those things which are above , but you may inform their Judgments . You cannot write the Law of God in their hearts , nor put his Fear into their inward parts , but you may acquaint them with the Law of God , and read the Bible to them , and hear them read both it and other Othodox good Books , but the Bible most and rather than the best Books in the World. So again , you cannot make them good , but you may set a good Example before them , and write a very fair Copy for them to imitate , and invite them to tread in your steps , saying to them as Paul did , Be ye followers of me as I am of Christ , and walk so as ye have us for an example . It is certain , all this is in your power , you may do it ; and oh that you would ! Oh that you would abound in the doing of it ! considering how much you have done against them , how greatly you have prejudiced them , how much they have suffered through your means , how much they have been tainted by you . Really , you are obliged to this , this is no more than what you owe to these poor Creatures , and if you are careless , negligent and wanting herein , you are unjust , you with hold that which is meet , and it tends to your own poverty , and sorrow at the last ; it is in the power of your hand to do it , therefore do not withhold it from them to whom it is due ; it is a Debt , and that both of Charity and of Equity ; up then in your several Families , and apply to this excellent needful work ; for the Lord's sake apply to it with diligence and chearfulness ; what your hand findeth to do herein , do with all your might : And since your planting and watering will turn to no account , unless God give the increase , begin and second all these holy endeavours with prayer . Beg of God that he would open their understandings , and hearts , that he would work together with you , and by you , and that he would be pleased to out-do you ; that he would work that in them and for them which you cannot . III. Consid●r seriously whose your Children and Servants are ; they are yours , yea and they are God's as well as yours , God's more than yours . First ; They are yours . Your Children are yours by Nature , begotten or born of you ; parts of your selves ; from you under God they had their Being . Your Servants are yours by Compact or Covenant . And here let us call again to mind what was said before , they are both your Charge , and therefore they ought to be your Care ; you are to look to them ; you will look to your Money and Goods , and not lose them if you can help it . The Countrey-man will look to his Corn and Cattel that he may not lose them , and is there not reason for as great care here , and greater too ? Our Saviour said , It is the will of him that sent me , that of all whom he hath given me I should lose none ; and I am sure it is so here . It is the will of him that sent you into the World , that of all whom he hath given you , you should lose none . There may be indeed , as there was in Christ's Family , so in yours , a Son , a Daughter of Perdition , who lose themselves , who will ruin and destroy themselves , and their Blood will be upon their own heads . But have you a care that you do not lose them through your wilful carelesness and neglect . For , as I have said , they are your Charge , and believe me , the Charge of a Family is a great Charge , of mighty weight and importance as all the World , all ranks and degrees of Men will find it when that day shall come in which the Eternal God will reckon with them . You know that if any one come by an untimely Death , whether it be in the City , or in the Countrey , the Coroners Inquest must be called and sit upon the Body , who ought to make a strict and impartial Enquiry about it , that the Murderer might be discovered and brought to condign Punishment , because there is not only the Loss of a Relation or a Servant , but also the King hath lost a Subject . Bring this to the present case before us ; here is such an one , a Soul lost in this Family , and there is another lost in that Family , and so in a great many more , the Lord only knows how great the number of them is . How many thousand of Souls do every day drop into Hell ! If people would give themselves leave seriously to consider it , it would make their hearts to ake and dissolve into Tears ; and peradventure it is , nay I do not in the least question but it is the case of some of your Families . You have lost a Child , and you a Daughter and you a Servant , in that sense in which the compassionate Father said concerning his Prodigal , This my Son was lost , he was dead . He was dead in trespasses and sins ; the poor mournful Father had lost him , and the Devil taken him up for a Stray ; but these of yours are lost beyond the possibility of a recovery , their Souls are lost for ever ; they are dead , and dead in sin ; their Bodies are laid in the Grave in a Bed of Dust and their Souls are gone down to Hell , and there laid upon a Bed of Flames , which Divine Justice hath prepared for them , and the Breath of the Lord like as a stream of Brimstone doth feed . But now here God hath lost a Creature , one that was the work of his own hands ; and you may be sure , that He will make Inquisition for Blood : How did this Soul , and that Soul come thus to miscarry ? was it their own doing ? was it through their own folly and madness , because they would not hearken to the Voice of their Teachers ? or was it through the neglect of those to whose care and tuition they were committed ? The guilt of every ones Blood shall be laid some where , and God will lay it where it ought to lie ; and there is , as you may gather from what hath been said , reason why God should thus proceed ; because , Secondly ; They ( I mean your Children and Servants ) are God's as well as yours , nay they are more God's than yours . He indeed gave them to you , as Iacob told his Brother , These are the Children which God hath graciously given to thy Servant . But when he gave them to you , he did not alienate them from himself , nor part with his own Right , but reserves that whole and entire to himself . He so gives them to us , that still they are his : Yea , they are more his than ours . And so it is with all our other Enjoyments . Take one Scripture or two for the proof of this ; first as to our Enjoyments , some Men think their Estates are their own , and their Money their own , so that they may do with them whatsoever they please , but it is no such matter , we are but Stewards , God is the Lord of all . For this see Hos. 2.8 , 9. I gave her Corn and Wine , and multiplied her Silver and Gold. They were his , and he gave them to her : But observe now , he retain'd a propriety in them , and therefore upon her misemploying and abusing them , he threatned to take them away . I will return and take away my Corn in the time thereof , and my Wine in the season thereof , and recover my Wooll and my Flax. They were hers by vertue of God's donation , but they were his also , and now she should know as much , for he will turn her out , and take the Possession of all again . This consideration should make all wary that they do not sin with their Enjoyments , nor maintain their Lusts at God's cost , nor with God's allowances make provision for the Flesh ; and it should also teach rich Men to do good with what they have , and quicken them to acts of Piety and Charity : Your Estates are yours , but they are God's too , and therefore as you ought to use them for your own good and comfort , so you must lay them out for God's honour , and for God's poor ; for the Sovereign right in your Estates is in God ; and it is the same as to your Children , God lays his claim to them , Ezek. 16.20 , 21. Thou hast taken thy sons and thy daughters , whom thou hast born unto me , and these hast thou sacrificed unto them to be devoured . Is this of thy Whoredoms a small matter that thou hast slain my Children , and delivered them to cause them to pass thorough the fire for them ? Mark it , the Lord grants they were her Children , but he doth also call them his Children , he owns that she did bear them , but saith , thou didst bear them to me ; as it was then , so it is now ; as the Cattel upon a thousand Hills are his , so the Children of a thousand Families , yea , of all the Families upon the Earth ; particularly of his Covenanting People , Ier. 31.1 . I will be , saith the Lord , the God of all the Families of Israel , and they shall be my people . He is the God of all the Children of those Families , they are his Children ; remember and consider it , your Children are God's Children , they had their Being from him , he formed them , he brought them forth , and brought them up , and carried them in Arms , and taught them to go , and put them out to you to Nurse , and you are to look after them , and take care of them , and bring them up for him ; you are to see to it that they have the nurture and admonition of the Lord. So for your Servants , they are not only your Servants , but his too , they were his Servants before they were yours , and his more than they are yours , and more bound to obey and please him than you ; so that if your Will thwart Gods , and your Commands be contrary to the Commandments of God , they are not to do them , they are more bound to God than they are to you , and they expect more from him than they do from you , and have a greater and more necessary dependance upon him than they have upon you , and therefore they owe him more service than they do you , Psal. 119.19 . All are thy Servants , Kings and Princes are his Servants , David was free to own it , O Lord , truly I am thy Servant , I am thy Servant . And Oh that they would all lay their Crowns at his Feet , and serve him by ruling for him . You that are Masters and Mistresses are his Servants , as proud as some of you are , and how high soever you hold your Heads , yet know you are but Servants , though really it is not your disparagement to be God's Servants , but your Honour so that you are good and faithful Servants , and I beseech you look to that . And I say your Servants are God's Servants too ; yea , and what the Angel said to Iohn I may to you , notwithstanding the civil distance which is now between you , they are your Fellow-servants , as you will find at the last and great day , when you come to be stript of all these outward pre-eminencies , and to stand upon even ground with them , only your account will be greater . Sit down , I beseech you , and think of this once and again , those that are bound to you are also bound to God ; and will you teach them your Business , and not that which God hath given them to do ? Will you take care to make them good Shopkeepers , and not to make them good Christians ? Will you call upon them , and urge and press them to do your work , yea , and beat them too , in case they do it not , and will you not regard their doing or neglecting of the work of God ? Shall it be nothing to you though they forget God , and let his work lye dead upon their hands , and serve the Devil and diverse Lusts all the Year round ? You your selves do not serve God as you ought , if you do not promote what you can your Servants serving him , for so to do is part of your business , it is the duty of your place . Besides , let me here add this further , if the Parents of those who are bound to you be gracious themselves , and do indeed fear God , they did expect much from you when they did bind them to you ; they had a good Opinion of you as of Persons truly Religious , and of your Families as Religious , and that their Sons would meet not only with sobriety there , but also with the practices of Piety , and they did promise themselves that they had disposed well of their Children , and chosen such Masters for them as would take special care of them as to their Souls , and go on to build upon that good Foundation which they themselves had already laid , and that you would be not only giving them an insight into your Callings , but also shewing them the good way in which they ought to walk , and go before them in it , they did promise themselves that you would provide not only Meat and Drink , wholesome and sufficient Diet for their Bodies , but also that Food which would help to the nourishing of their Souls to Eternal Life . In that hope , and for that end they committed them to you , and if you be careless herein , if you do not pray with them , nor instruct and counsel them , you disappoint their expectations , you frustrate and deceive their hopes , you are false to your trust , and it is impossible that you should ever answer it to God or them , and yet answer for it you shall , but to your cost except you repent and reform . IV. Remember and consider that those who are of your Families , and under your care are excellent and noble Creatures . How low soever their outward condition is , and how far soever they are beneath you upon worldly accounts , yet they were made by the same hand , are of the same original , the Master-pieces of the Creation in this inferiour World ; and here I will more particularly offer these few things to your thoughts . First ; They have Souls as well as you . Souls to save , as well as Bodies to feed , Souls that quicken and actuate their Bodies , and render them capable of being serviceable to you ; and be their Bodies never so amiable and lovely , never so robust and well built , never so lively and active , yet without the Soul they would be no other than useless Carcases , lumps of Clay ; both unprofitable and unsavoury , and these Souls being the better , and by far the more noble part , are to be principally respected , to be sure not totally forgotten and neglected ; and a Trade is to be driven with Heaven for them , as well as one upon Earth for the Body ; and though it be no great matter whether they be great and rich in the World , yet it is necessary that they be rich in Faith , and good Works , and toward God ; and since there is another World beside this , and when they go out of this World they immediately pass into that , and they must continue there to all Eternity without a remove , or any alteration , it is absolutely necessary that they be well provided before they go , and lay up Treasures in Heaven . As for the things of this World they must leave them all behind them , though they have gotten never so much ; Riches take to themselves Wings , and often fly away , they leave their owners in a pitiful plight ; however their owners must at last leave them . Death , when once it comes will make an Eternal separation ; so Iob knew , and said , Iob 1. Naked came I out of my mothers womb , and naked shall I return thither . Hence it follows , that they are nearly and everlastingly concerned to look after those things which are better and more durable : To get that knowledge of God and Iesus Christ which is life eternal , and to be well stored with those Graces , and that everlasting righteousness of Christ , which will accompany them to the Tribunal , and to be much busied and employ'd about those works which will follow them in glorious Rewards , for otherwise it had been better for them they had never been Born. Secondly ; Do you know the Souls of your Children and Servants are as precious as yours ? Whatever difference there may be in your Bodies , as to their stature , and strength , and comeliness , and beauty , yet your Souls are the same , and theirs come not into the World more corrupt , guilty , and depraved than yours ; Original Sin is the same in all the Sons and Daughters of Adam , their Souls are as precious as yours ; for , First ; The same God made them , Ezek. 18.4 . Behold all souls are mine , as the soul of the father , so also the soul of the son is mine ; and as the Soul of the Master , so also the Soul of the Servant ; and as the Soul of the Mistress , so the Soul of the Maid , they are all Gods ; as he is the Creator of them , and the Lord of them , and the Supream Judge of them : And he hath a respect to them all as they are the work of his hands , as an Artist hath to a curious piece of his own making . Secondly ; Their Souls have the same Faculties and Powers that yours have ; Understanding , Memory , Conscience , Will , Affections ; they are intelligent and rational Souls , though they have not had the same opportunities , means and advantages for their accomplishments , which some of you have had and slighted , and not improved as you ought . Thirdly ; Their Souls cost as great a price to redeem as yours ; supposing them to be some of Christ's purchased ones , God did not set several Rates upon the Souls of Men , nor did the Lord Jesus pay a greater Ransom for the Soul of David a King than he did for the Soul of Lazarus a Beggar , not a greater for the Soul of the Master than for the Soul of the Servant , for the Soul of the Mistress than of the Maid , but the very same , both the one and the other did stand him in no less than his Heart-blood ; and he rejoiceth over the one when Converted , Sanctified , and brought into his Fold , and under his Government as the other ; and he will at last as much welcome the one into his heavenly Kingdom , and as abundant an entrance into it shall be ministred to the one as to the other . Fourthly ; Their Souls may have the same Capacities ; and allowing them the like advantages for improvement , and the like opportunities for action , they may be as useful in the World while they live , and very serviceable , bringing a great deal of glory to God , and doing a great deal of good to Man. Valleys are usually fertile , when lofty Mountains are barren ; and those that are poor in this World , are frequently rich in good works ; and they are receptive of as great Preferment , Happiness and Glory in the World to come . They may , and will be as quick and nimble in their flight to Heaven , they may as sweetly and comfortably enjoy God , and be as much fitted and prepared for the Divine Presence and Bliss , and for a setting upon the Right Hand of Christ , as the Master or the Mistress ; nay , some of them may be advanced to an higher degree of Glory , and Eternally shine with brighter Beams : but on the contrary , if these their precious Souls do not go to Heaven , they must be packt down to Hell ; if they are not Sav'd they must be Damned ; if not taken up to the Enjoyment of God , then they are Companions for Devils ; if not Timber for the Building , then Fewel for the Burning ; if they be not taken up into the Arms of Divine Love , they will be the miserable Objects of Divine Wrath and Fury , and lye restless and roaring under unsufferable Torments , in which they can have no relief , not so much as a drop of Water to cool their Tongue , and from which they shall have no deliverance . And now , O ye Fathers and Mothers , and ye Masters and Mistresses , what are ye made of ? Have you Hearts harder than a Rock ? Are you worse than the Sea-monsters , and like unto the Ostriches in the Wilderness ? Where are your Mercies ? Where your Bowels ? Where the yearning and the soundings of them ? Will you not pity these precious Souls ? Have you no kindness nor compassion for them ? Do you not desire their good ? Will you not seek their good ? Will not you do what in you lies to prevent their everlasting ruin and destruction ? It is no wonder that Devils who be●ool'd themselves into endless misery , and are inraged against God , and implacable Enemies to Men , envying them the possibility of being saved ; it is , I say , not any matter of wonder at all that they do what they can to ruin them , and to bring them into the same misery with themselves ; but will you do nothing to prevent it ? Will not you do what you can to spoil the Devils design , and to secure these precious Souls from the Snare of the Devil , or deliver them out of it ? What! Not you who have curam animarum , the care and charge of Souls lying upon you ; not you , to whose oversight they are committed ? Not you , who are Responsible for them , and will at last be call'd to an account , will you let them perish without endeavouring to save them , and let them go down to Hell without labouring to stop them in their Career ? Will you stand by and see them drown without reaching forth an helping Hand ? For God's sake be not so cruel , so hard-hearted , put on Bowels , put on Bowels . Will it not be a bitter reflexion to you at the last , when the matter is out of your hands , and past remedy ? Will it not grieve you ? Will it not go to your very Hearts ? In short , will it not be a Sword in your Bones , and a tormenting Sting in your Consciences , when you shall think such a Child of mine , and such a Servant of mine are now lost , irrecoverably , everlastingly lost , and they may thank me for it ; they were grosly ignorant , and I took no care to teach them ; they went on in a course of sin , and I did not endeavour to reclaim them , and they have now fatally miscarried , but it is thorough my fault as well as their own : had I done what I might have done , had I done what it was in the power of my hand to do , possibly it might never have come to this ; as Ioseph's Brethren in their distress said one to another , Gen. 42.21 . We are verily guilty concerning our brother ; so may you say , I am guilty , verily I am guilty concerning these my Children , and these my Servants : and really it is strange to me that you do enjoy any peace , that you can walk about in quietness in the day , and rest in the night , and are not scar'd with frightful Apparitions . I ascribe it meerly to the patience and goodness of God , that since poor Creatures are for ever ruin'd thorough your sinful neglect , their Ghosts after their death do not continually haunt you , and dogg you from place to place , and from room to room , and undraw your Curtains , and with a ghastly Countenance and dreadful Looks stare you in the Face ; for their Blood lyeth on you , yea , it is you that have been their Murderers , you have Murder'd their precious Souls , you have poyson'd them by your bad and heathenish Examples , by your living in a wretched , ungrateful forgetfulness of God , and in a sinful , vile neglect of his Worship and Service , not having his glory in your Eyes , nor his fear before them : You have been the death of them by with-holding from them that which was their due ; Family-instruction which you were obliged to have given them , and other Family-duties which you were bound to have perform'd with them . V. And lastly , I judge it worth while as to the business in hand to enquire of you that are Parents , Whether your Children have not been dedicated and given up to God in and by Baptism ? And of you that are Masters and Governours of Families , whether you do not believe that the Fathers and Mothers of those who are your Apprentices and Servants have also dedicated and given them up unto God ? I know there is room and reason enough at this day for such a Question ; because the Administration of that Ordinance unto the Infants of Believers themselves is by so many denied and decried ; and therefore I ask again , whether they have been brought under the Bond of the Covenant ? And whether they have had the Seal of the Covenant ministred to them ? Have they not been Baptized ? I do heartily wish that the Children of all professed Christians were ; and whatever dust hath been raised , and is continued , I doubt not , but when that happy time shall come wherein the Iews shall be converted , and brought to the owning and believing in our dear Lord Iesus , that Controversie will be happily determin'd , and Infant-baptism found to be not of Men but of God. But I ask now , whether yours have been Baptized ? If they have , then , First ; Know and consider that God hath a special right and propriety in them . A more special Interest in your Children and Servants , and a more peculiar right to them than he hath in and to others in the World. He hath a right to others , to all by vertue of Creation and Preservation , as they are the work of his Hands , from whom they receiv'd their Being at the first , and by whom their Being is continued , and their Souls held in Life ; but he hath another superadded right to these , viz. by vertue of Donation , the Parents Gift ; they have a natural right to dispose of their Children , and these have disposed of theirs to God , which was an act of the highest Wisdom , and dearest Love ; all indeed are Gods Servants , and let them carry toward him accordingly , but Persons Baptized are his Sealed Servants . Secondly ; Not to train such up for God , is not only cruelty to them , yea , prodigious and barbarous cruelty , but likewise it is apparent injustice to God ; yea , it is Sacriledge , the worst of Sacriledge . It is accounted , and is a wicked thing to rob Churches of their Vestments , and Ornaments , and Plate , but what is that to a robbing God of Men , and Women , and Children , and delivering them up to Vanity , and Sin , and the Devil ; certainly that propriety which God hath in them , your Children and Servants , is a great obligation upon you to bring them up for him , and to instruct them in his work and service , and to make them join with you therein , that by being well acquainted with it , and us'd to it , they may be expert at it , that they may carry as becomes them , and act in a sweet suitableness to that Relation in which they stand to God , and be in the better capacity of setting up his Worship afterward in their Families , when they come to have Houses of their own , that by this means Religion may be posteritiz'd , and descend among you from Generation to Generation , and when you are gone down to your Graves there may not want those who will stand up in their day to serve , own , and honour the God of their Fathers . Thirdly ; Would it not be a trouble to you if those that are yours should prove wicked ? Without peradventure , if you are Christians indeed , as you profess your selves ; if you have any real goodness in you , and not meerly a vain shew and empty name , if you have any Sense , if any Bowels , if any softness and tenderness of Heart , it cannot but be very affecting to you , and exceeding grievous to you to think that any of yours should prove Sons and Daughters of Belial , Persons that know not the Lord , and that fear not the Lord ; sure I am , the very fear of such a thing hath made some gracious Persons go bowed down ▪ and in the bitterness of their Spirits ; nay , would it not grieve you that any of your Servants who are Gods , should turn Rebels against him , or that any of your Servants , who are Gods more than yours should prove desperate Enemies to him , and instead of delighting in his Service , and laying out their All for his Glory and the Interest of his Name , of whom you have had so long and ample Experience , and unto whom they also are so much engaged , should absurdly turn their Backs against him , and do the sordid , filthy works of sin , and drudge for a Devil , and after all their pains receive no other wages than death , yea , the second death , which will be followed with a Burial in Hell , out of which there is no Resurrection ; and there is one thing more , which I commend to you as worthy of your solemn and frequently repeated thoughts , viz. That it will greatly add to your guilt , and by consequence no less add to your affliction and horrour , if it be imprest and set home upon your Consciences , that this miscarriage of theirs did come to pass through any gross and wilful neglect of yours , and was the bitter effect of your failure in point of duty which you did owe both to God and to them . Let me tell you , how light soever any that hear me , or read this Book may make of these things now in this damnably Atheistical and Profane Age , yet you will find them like a Talent of Lead , yea , heavier than a Mountain , when God is pleased to set them home . Unto what hath been spoken with reference both to your Children and Servants ; there is something which I would add with respect to your Children in particular , and that is this . Fourthly ; You that are Parents , consider , I beseech you , and lay to heart your own actual dedicating and giving your Children up to God. Have you not done it ? I ask you again , have you not done it ? And that in the most sacred and solemn way of a Gospel Ordinance ; while others did satisfie themselves with giving their Children a Name , as if they had not at that time God in any of their thoughts , as a Person in the least concerned , you did present and bind them to God , out of a seeming , yea , and professed sense of duty to him , and kindness to them ; did not you go to or send for a Minister , desiring of him that your Children might be made partakers of Baptism ? And were they not by that made ( as I said before ) God's sealed Servants ? You do , as I suppose and hope , at least , you should know , that Baptism comes in the room of Circumcision , and is the Seal of the Covenant , and so by your bringing them to Baptism you did , as a Learned Divine , Mr. Whiston , saith , give them up to God under your Hand and Seal ; some of you have done it publickly , in the Face of the whole Congregation , which without doubt is the best way , and I do heartily wish it were universally and constantly practised , ( unless where absolute necessity forbids ; ) because being rightly administred , and according to the Institution and Command of our great Lord , it is most for Edification , which ought to be studied in all the Churches of Christ ; but others , who for Reasons best known to themselves have chosen Privacy , did Invite some of your Friends and Neighbours that they might be Witnesses of it in your own Families . Now I look upon it as being so evident that it is past a contradiction , that this your giving them up to God did not only express your belief of that right which God had to them , nor only your willingness they should be his Servants , nor only your committing them to his care and conduct ; but also did necessarily imply a purpose to train and bring them up for God. If that was not in your Hearts and Resolutions , what you did therein was a meer cheat , you did in that great and solemn work act the part of vile Hypocrites , and mock'd both God and Man. Sure I am , many of you did engage your selves to do this , you promis'd it , yea , and that in totidem terminis , in so many words , the great God of Heaven is himself a Witness thereof , and so are all that were present ; and what now my Friends ? Have you not bound your selves ? And will you play fast and loose with God ? An honest Man will be as good as his word , and will not you ? Will you forfeit that Name ? Will you lose your Credit in Heaven , yea , and among good Men upon Earth that know you ? How should any Man trust you who are not true to God , unto whom you are so much obliged , and upon whom you have an absolute dependance ? Dare any of you go from your words ? dare you ? Again I say , dare you ? What , deal falsly with God! If Covenant-bonds are no more to you than the green Withes , or new Cords were to Samson , which he easily snapt asunder ; if your Promises will signifie nothing , but vanish like Winds , know , God hath other Bonds that are strong enough , Bonds of Wrath and Fury , everlasting Chains that will hold you ; if your own Promises are not sufficient to bind you to your duty , your breach of Promise will be sufficient to bind you over to punishment . The Apostle Paul speaking of God , saith , 1 Thes. 5.24 . Faithful is he who hath called you , that also will do it . God hath called you to a Fellowship and Communion with him , and he hath made many great and precious Promises , and he is a faithful God , a Covenant-keeping God , a Promise-performing God , and he also will do it ; do it , what will he do ? That which he hath promised , all that he hath promised , no one iota or tittle shall fail ; consider this , and let it not be said of you , that you have indeed promised , but you are unfaithful , and you will not do it ; you are very strict with Men , expecting they should keep their word with you , and keep day too , but you make no Conscience of keeping your word with God. Consider again what the same holy Apostle saith , 2 Cor. 1.20 . All the promises of God are in him , i. e. in Christ , yea , and in him , Amen , to the glory of God. They are all so , God is not off and on with his People , his Promises are immutable , things in which it is impossible for him to Lie , he can as soon deny himself as them ; they shall all be performed in their season , and to the full . Christians , do you trust this God , and rely upon these Promises , and rejoice in them as assurance enough ? But withal , do you study an holy conformity and likeness to this God ? And never let it be said of you , that your Promises are Yea and Nay . Once more let me propound to you the Example of that excellent Person Hannah , who was a Woman of a sorrowful Spirit , her Adversary Peninnah provoking her sore to make her fret , because the Lord had shut up her Womb. We find , 1 Sam. 1. that in her affliction she prayed , which is a proper course , a good vent to an oppressed Soul , a Sovereign Remedy in distress . In her Prayer she begg'd that God would look on her affliction , and remember her , and give her a man-child ; and as she prayed so she promised , that if God would fulfil her desire in giving her a Son , she would give him unto the Lord all the days of his life , and she did so . When God had granted her Prayer she performed her Promise ; when she had the desire of her Heart , God had given her a Son , whose Name she called Samuel , she and her Husband Elkanah brought him to the House of the Lord which was in Shiloh , and so having obtained him of God by Prayer , she returned him unto God with Thankfulness , and while he was a Child , a very young Child , soon after he was weaned she carried him thither , viz. unto the Tabernacle , 1 Sam. 1.25 , 26 , 27 , 28. The Child was young , and they slew a Bullock , and brought the Child to Eli , and she said , O my Lord , as thy soul liveth , my Lord , I am the Woman that stood by thee here praying unto the Lord ; for this Child I prayed , and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of him , therefore also have I lent him unto the Lord as long as he liveth he shall be lent unto the Lord ; and there she left him with good old Eli the Priest , that by him he might be tutor'd , educated , and brought up for God , and instructed in the Law , and so the better prepar'd and fitted for the work and service of God in his Generation . But that I may shut up this Particular , I will look upon this Congregation as having in it Persons of different Perswasions about the Ordinance of Baptism , or the Persons unto whom it is to be administred , the Subjects capable of it , and I shall speak something to both . First ; There are possibly some Persons , though I suppose not many of them , here present before the Lord , who are not satisfied in their Consciences about Infant-baptism , and therefore have not that sacred Ordinance administred unto their Children during that their Minority , that Sign or Token of the Covenant is not set or given to them , as apprehending them to be in the same condition with those who are Aliens to the Commonwealth of Israel , and Strangers to the Covenants of Promise ; though the truth is , the Children of Believers are the holy Seed , born Members of that Commonwealth , and within the Covenant of Promise . But I dispute not the Point with them , having in mine Age something else to do than to spend my few precious hours in Controversies ; but this I would say to all those that are of that Perswasion , that it doth very greatly concern them to be very careful and constant in the performance of Family-duties , and I should be very glad to hear that they are consciencious , and as diligent therein as the matter doth require . Oh! that they would take pains and spend a convenient portion of time in praying with their unbaptized Children and Servants , and in Instructing and Catechizing of them , and in using all the means which God hath appointed , and that are within the compass of their power , that so they might be brought to the knowledge of God , and to a believing in , owning of , and submitting to the Lord Jesus Christ , and to a laying hold upon the Covenant ; that so they may , when grown up , have a right to the benefits of it , and partake of the Blessings of it , and be fit to receive the Seal of it ; and my hearty Prayer to the Father of Mercies , and God of all Grace on their behalf is , that they may lay it to their Hearts as they ought , and often think with themselves how much it stands them in hand , and what an obligation resulting from their own Principles , lyes upon them to be very holy in their Lives , and very industrious in their Places for the good of their Families , and in order to the working of Knowledge in their Heads , and Grace in their Hearts , and Holiness in their Lives , that of those concerning whom they do now say , They are none of God's people , God may be graciously pleas'd to say , They are my people , and I am the Lord their God ; But , Secondly ; There are others here , with and for whom I am more concerned , as being of that Flock of God , over which the Holy Ghost hath made me an Overseer ; and these are for the Baptizing of Children in their Infancy , and so for an early dedication and binding of them to God and his Service ; you are my Charge , and I can say as to many of you , you are my Joy and Crown , and , I hope , will be so in the day of Christ : and it is my hearty Desire and Prayer that you may adorn the Gospel , and walk unto all well-pleasing , and make it your endeavour to stand compleat in all the Will of God. Now I would have you all to know , and do intreat you to consider and remember that ( as a worthy Divine , as yet I hope in the Land of the Living hath observed ) there is an equal Tye , and full out as strong an Obligation to an holy care and diligence this way , lying upon those Parents that are for the Baptizing of Children in their Infancy , as there is upon those that are against it ; you ought not to be more slack and remiss in teaching and rightly principling your Baptized Children than they are in instructing their unbaptized Children ; you ought to be as diligent in bringing them up graciously whom you have bound to God , as they are or can be in the Education of them whom they do thus far leave at liberty , though indeed you do not drive on the same design with them , nor level and aim at the same end they do , for as he saith , and it is true , Antipaedo-baptists , who are consciencious , and do indeed love and fear the Lord , ought and will endeavour to bring up their Children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord , and earnestly to seek their conversion and turning from darkness to light , and from the power of Satan to God , and their personal embracing and laying hold upon the Covenant , that thereupon they may be brought into a Covenant-state , that they may be admitted and taken into Covenant , and that they may come under the Wing , and Benefit , and Blessing of it . Whereas those holy Parents who have their Children Baptized in their Infancy have not that in their Eye as their end , for they do not doubt of their Covenant-state , for they do firmly hold their being Born in Covenant with God , as they are the Children of Believers , and they also know that that Covenant hath been sealed to them ; yet notwithstanding they do reckon themselves greatly concerned and no less obliged to endeavour the Instruction and Conversion , and their own personal owning and embracing of the Covenant , and Cordial , Chearful coming up to the terms and requiries of it ; and that for these Considerations and Reasons which I shall name , and lightly touch , and so pass on . First ; That they might understand their Duty , what it is that the Lord their God requires of them , and what their Parents did in their young and tender years bind them to the observance and performance of , that through their own folly and default they may not be cast out and cut off , as Ishmael was tho he had Abraham for his Father , and had himself been Circumcised ; and so it was with Esau afterwards . Now these Parents do not think it enough that the Covenant between God and their Children hath been struck and sealed , but they would have it established , everlasting and sure , they would have their Children kept , preserved in a Covenant-state , live and die in it . Secondly ; It is the earnest desire of such holy and gracious Parents , not only that their children might be preserved in a Covenant-state , but also that they might be happy sharers in the good of it , and the Benefits and Blessings thereof may descend upon them ; for Persons may be in a Covenant-state , and yet fall short of the best and richest Blessings of it , such as are the fruits of special love , and distinguishing . As a Man may be in Christ the true Vine , and yet not partake of his sap and fatness , Iohn 15. So he may be in Covenant , and yet not have Covenant-grace , nor a Covenant-spirit ; a Man may be externally in a Covenant-state , and yet in an unregerate , and unjustified-state ; and therefore that which doth most strongly engage Parents to teach their Children , and endeavour the bringing them up to the terms of the Covenant , is that they might so honour , obey , and please God as withal to reap and enjoy all those great good things , precious Mercies , and singular Blessings which are contained in the Covenant , and conveyed by it . Thirdly ; A being faithful to the Covenant , and a living up to its terms , and performing its conditions , is the Duty and Interest of all those who would be savingly the better for it ; unto that a continuance in the Covenant is of equal necessity with an entrance and admission into it . How can any Man make that Covenant his plea or argument , or rationally expect Life and Happiness from it , who himself hath violated and broken it ; that Person whose own sin hath cast him out of Covenant , hath no more interest in , nor right to the Blessings thereof than he that was never in it . Nay , Fourthly ; The condition of such an one is far the worse and more dismal of the two , as his sins are more accented , more black , more provoking and crying than the sins of another , being breaches of Covenant , sins against greater Obligations , so there is less hope of him , his case is more dangerous and desperate , the Wound that he hath made looks as if it were altogether incurable , and the Wrath that such an one is like to suffer may well be more fiery and fierce , the Judgments more severe , not Rods but Scorpions are proper in such a case ; what will God do when he comes to avenge the quarrel of his Covenant . I have thus largely shewn you that are Parents and Governours of Families what Obligations you are under for the setting up and continuing of the Service and Worship of God in your Families , upon the consideration of the young ones , the Children and Servants which are in your Houses , and under your Care ; and I am not a little confident , that if you will be so just to the Cause , and your selves , as to weigh the arguments , your Consciences will tell you the Obligation is very strong ; and oh ! that the truth deliver'd may be so upon you , and upon many more , that you may not be found rebelling against the light , nor holding the truth in Righteousness , but falling before it , and to your work . There remains but one Obligation more to this great and necessary Work of Family-Worship , and Duty , which I shall take notice of in this Discourse , and speak unto ; and that doth arise from the consideration of the Publick , the City , the Nation , the Church of God , unto which you are so nearly related , as being Parts and Members of them , and in which you are so highly concerned ; your Relation is not so near , but that your interest is as great , ponder on these following Particulars . Let this I beseech you , return often upon your thoughts , and lay it near your hearts ; you are Citizens of London , Famous London , which Enemies have done much against , and God hath done great things for , what will you do for it ? In London you have many Mercies , many Priviledges , many Comforts ; you are the Natives of England , the Free-born People of England , a sweet and pleasant name , be dear over it , both name and thing . It was in this Countrey that you first drew your breath , here that you were planted by the gracious hand of Divine Providence , and grown and flourished , and you would be exceeding unnatural and inhumanely cruel to this poor City , and to this pleasant Land , the Land of your Nativity , if you do not heartily desire its welfare , and to the utmost seek its good . The Iews were to pray for the peace of Ierusalem , which was their Metropolis , their Capital City , where there were the Thrones of Judgment , the Thrones of the House of David , and whether the Tribes went up ; the Tribes of the Lord , to the testimony of Israel . See how David excited others , and resolved himself to contribute what might be to its happiness , Psal. 122.6 , 7 , 8 , 9. Pray for the peace of Ierusalem , they shall prosper that love thee , peace be within thy walls , and prosperity within thy Palaces ; for my Brethren and Companions sake , I will now say , peace be within thee , because of the House of the Lord our God , I will seek thy good . We are as much bound to Pray for London , which is our English Ierusalem ; was that the literal Ierusalem , the City of their Solemnities , so it is called , Isa. 33.20 . London , through the goodness of a gracious God hath been , and in spite of Hell and Rome yet is the City of our Solemnities ; and I beseech you read and think upon that which the Lord of Hosts , the God of Israel said unto them who were carried away Captive from Ierusalem to Babylon , Ier. 29.7 . Seek the peace of the City whither I have caused you to be carried away Captives , and pray unto the Lord for it , for in the peace thereof ye shall have peace . Now , if they were to pray for the peace of Babylon , which was the place of their Captivity , we are in reason much more bound to pray for , and by all means seek the peace and welfare of London , and England , which is the place of our Nativity . Secondly , Cast your eye upon the present State of London , and of England , have not our iniquities brought us low ? the hand of God hath been for many years , and in many ways heavy upon the Land , and it is stretched out still ; the truth is , our preservation is wonderful , and the Lord hath done great things for us , of which we have reason to be glad , and to give him glory , but for all that we are brought low , the Crown is fallen from our head , our honour is under an Eclipse . In some respects England is scarce to be found in England , there is a withering blast upon us , and a sad dismal face of things . How many Judgements doth this Nation lie under , both Spiritual and Temporal ? O! the sad Divisions that are among us , which grow wider instead of an healing Spirit ; behold a perverse Spirit is gone forth in the midst of us ; how do errours and all manner of false Doctrines abound and swarm there ? the Serpent hath cast out of his mouth like a flood , that he might drown and swallow up the Church of God among us . Now that she is in her wilderness State. What a Spirit of Atheism hath possess'd Men ? We have a company of wretches , that rather than they will own God , will hold they themselves shall die like Beasts ; these are none of the old Fools , who said in their hearts there is no God , these have far out done them in speaking it with their mouths . I have indeed been told that some of these are very sensible Men , and indeed I do conclude , that not only some Atheists are so , but that they all are so , yea , and that they are altogether so , men immerst and quite sunk into sense , they have shaken hands with reason , quite blinded and put out the eye of reason ; for otherwise , in the very things before them they would see the invisible things of God , even his Eternal Power and Godhead , Rom. 1.20 . To which , I might add that general and monstrous prophaneness which hath broken all banks , and overflow'd us , which hath risen up to that highth of impudence , that it can out-face the Sun , and walk unveil'd at noon ; and what do you feel ? hath not God , think you , risen out of his place to punish the Inhabitants of London , and of England , for their iniquities ? Hath he not revealed his wrath from Heaven against the ungodliness of Men ? doth not his Providence frown dreadfully ? hath he not in legible Characters written his high displeasure in those temporal Judgements that are among us ? what else means his not going forth with our Armies , the unsuccessfulness of our Fleet , the taking of our Merchants Ships , the loss of our Trade , the scarcity of Corn , the dearness of all Provisions , so that Poverty comes in upon us like an Armed Man ? let not Men grumble at these things , but lay them to heart , humble themselves , and reform , mourn , and amend their ways and doings . Thirdly , You are Members of the Church , as well as Citizens of London , and Natives of England . Some of you are come into stricter and closer Communion than others , in order to the better promoting of your Souls good , and your enjoyment of Ordinances purely administred , and , as you think , more according to the mind of God reveal'd in Scripture . However , all of you do profess your selves belonging to the Church of Christ , and so to be Members of his Mystical Body ; and you ought to study the good of the Church ; if you do not , there is no life in you , but you are dead members , you may have some kind of being in the body , but you are not of it , you do not receive Spirits and Life from the Head , no vital influences . And Oh! how did Paul complain and groan , because men were wholly selfish , confin'd and shrivel'd up into a narrow interest , seeking their own things , and not the things of Iesus Christ , i. e. the glory of his Name , and the good and prosperity of his Church , which is not a separate but a joynt interest , so that the promoting of one , is the promoting both , and you ought to study it , and do all that you can to contribute to it . Fourthly , Do not you know that a great many among us are the burthens of the Land , and that under them it groans ? we see England is sick , yea . it is heart sick , oh ! how faint it is , what convulsions hath it , what struglings are there , even as for life , but who is it sick of ? of the Fanaticks will some say , and I say so too , only understand it of them who are Fanaticks indeed , not of them who are Israelites indeed ; the Fools Cap is many times through a wilful mistake put upon a Wise Mans head ; but they will say , England is sick of the Dissenters , the Non-Conformists , and it will never be well till they be suppres'd , and purged out ; but those that are thus minded , go by very wrong measures , and are Physicians of no value . Ahab told Elijah that he troubled Israel , but the Holy Prophet did very justly and honestly return it upon the wicked King. I have not troubled Israel , but thou and thy Fathers House , in that ye have forsaken the Commandments of the Lord , 1 Kings 18.18 . And I dare also say , concerning those good men , which some have given that undeserved name to , what in another case Paul said to the Centurion , and the Souldiers , except these abide in the Ship ye cannot be saved , Acts 27.31 . I am not for making Parties , nor widening or continuing unnecessary differences , but desire to love every one that loveth the Lord Iesus in sincerity ; and I dare affirm , that those who are godly in the Nation are the strength thereof , the strength both of King , and Kingdom , Isa. 6.13 . the holy seed shall be the substance thereof . But I was saying , too many are the burthen of the Land , I mean , those that have suckt in , and do belch out damnable Doctrines , and the Prophane Crew , the Debauchees of the Age , the Land is sick of them , and perhaps will not be well 'till it hath eas'd it self , I say not of their Persons , but of their Principles and Practices ; those , those be the Persons that are the Pests and Plagues of the Nation , and may they be so accounted , in order to their being avoided , that so the spreading of the infection may be prevented ? but since there are such as these , multitudes of them , you that profess Religion , should desire , and pray , and labour to be the blessings of the Nation , and so to be , will be your honour . Fifthly , To fill up the places in which God hath been pleased to set you , is the way to make you blessings , publick blessings ; the way for the whole to thrive , is for every one to do his part ; when the Spring , Wheels , and Ballance move regularly , the Watch goes well , there is the honour of the place , and the profit of the place , and those that are high will expect that ; but there is also the work of the place , and let them and others also do that . It may be thou art but in a low and mean place , however , be thou contented with the disposal of Providence , that is the way to have a blessing from God for thy self , and to be thy self a blessing to the Nation . Consider then the place in which you are set , and study the duty of that place , and to that do thou apply thy self , and labour to do it all . Are any of you in publick place in City or Country , cloathed with Authority and Power , in a capacity of encouraging Vertue and Godliness , and of punishing and suppressing Vice , fill up your Place , it is pity there should be any Wicked , Profane , Idle , Careless Sloathful Magistrates , they are common Nusances . Have you none but a little Cock-Boat to manage ? being only Governours of Families , do you fill up your place , and do the duty of that . If you have but a little , it is the more easily done , be you faithful in your little , that is the way to advance , God may make you Rulers over much , to be sure you shall not miss of his joy . Sixthly , Families are the first Bodies out of which greater Societies and Communities do arise , and of which they are compos'd . Churches , Towns , Cities , Kingdoms are made up of Families , as the integrating parts the least Families is a part of the body , a Family is the first Society , as it was in our Primitive Parents Adam and Eve , and in its growth an increase it comes to be made up of several Persons , that stand in several Relations to one another , Husband , Wife , Son , Daughter , Man-Servant , Maid-Servant , Villages , Towns , Cities , Countries are all of them made up , as was said before , of several Families ; and according as it is in these smaller bodies , it is like to be in those greater ones ; if the several members be corrupt , it is utterly impossible that the body should be sound . If there be a Plague raging in the Houses , it is impossible there should be health in the City . And so if Families be tainted , corrupted , spoiled , who can rationally think that the Kingdom should be good ? Those larger and more numerous Societies which have been spoken of , may not unfitly be compared to Orchards , or Vineyards that should bring forth Fruit to God , and ought to be water'd with the Magistrates eye , and water'd by the Ministers hand ; our Families are the Nurseries in which young tender Plants are set and Nurs'd , and reer'd for the supplying and furnishing them afresh , as the Old Stock , the Super-annuated Trees of Righteousness do decay and wear off . Now if the Nurseries be not minded , if the young Plants there be not carefully and duely tended , what will become of the Orchard and Vineyard in a little while ? From hence we may , not without good reason , conclude that private Family-care is necessary for the promoting of publick and common good . Therefore I beseech you to look to your Nurseries , take care of your Families . Seventhly , I would ask not only those that are truly gracious , but likewise them that are sober and serious , are you not ashamed of and troubled at those crying Abominations that are among us ? Can Forreigners that come hither , and understand what is pure Religion , and undefiled before God , even the Father , and do observe the Miscarriages of Men ; I say , can they look upon this as Immanuel's Land , when they see it so over-run with Weeds , Briars and Thorns , can they think it to be the Garden of the Lord , or rather some of the Wilderness of the World , some of the Devils waste ? might not Heathens and Pagans say , they are become like some of us , yea , and worse than many of us ? The good Lord look upon us in mercy , and doth it not affect and afflict you , that it is thus , after all the Gospel-Light that hath shined among us , and after all the means that God hath used for our Resormation , in a mixt way of Mercy and Judgement , of Kindness , and Severity . I do very well know , there are almost every where great complaints of Prophaneness and Debauchery , and truly those complaints are not without great cause ; for Sin , gross Wickedness doth abound in all places , both in City and Country , if the Court be free I shall rejoyce , there are bad reports of Camp , and Fleet , Wickedness hoth broken in like a flood , as if it would deluge us , and prevail against all Piety , yea , and against all Morality too , filling all places with Atheism , and Brutishness , and without doubt , Men in High Places did draw up the Flood-gates , for the furthering an Antichristian design , Popery and Prophaneness are near a kin , let men have a liberty to do what they will , i. e. to commit all uncleanness with greediness , and an hundred to one they will be content that those who are uppermost should chuse their Religion for them ; yea , and also inferiour Magistrates and under Officers have pav'd its way . Blessed be they of the Lord , who have offered themselves willingly to give a check and stop to it ; and blessed be those Magistrates , who encourage and assist them therein ; and Oh! that the work may prosper in their hands ; but in the mean time , have not you private Men had an hand in it ? You do cry out against Publick Houses , Taverns , and Alehouses , and as I hear , so I believe , not without much cause , though some of them are in good hands , and care is taken that good Orders be observed in them , yet certainly the wickedness of others , yea , of many others is exceeding great ; they are the Devil's ground , in which he sets his Nets and lays his Snares for the catching of his unwary Prey , they are the Devils School , in which Men follow his Trade , and by both together young ones are taught it ; there it is that modesty is put off , and sober Principles pluck'd up by the Roots , and they learn the Mysteries of iniquity , and commence Masters of that Black Art. But you who do complain of these Publick-Houses , look home , lay your hands upon your hearts , and ask your own Consciences what you have done , and what you have left undone . Is there not the neglect of God , and the duties of Godliness in your houses , there is no Drunkenness , nor Whoredom , no Cursing and Swearing that you do allow , that is well , but withall , there is no Praying , nor Reading the Scripture , nothing of the Service and Worship of God there ; and by that means you do not as you ought , Principle your young ones against the Vices of the Times , and so you leave them too naked and open to the assaults of Temptation . This I would have imprest upon your thoughts , that the making of good Families , is the way to make a good City , and a good Kingdom . Let every one make it his business to set up Religion at home , and then we shall all be sure to find it when we go abroad . If all our Families were good , we should have good Princes , and good Parliaments , good Magistrates , and good Ministers , and good People ; good Husbands , Wives and Children , good Friends , and Neighbours , it would indeed be Aurea Aetas , a Golden Age. Eighthly and lastly ; The consciencious performance of Religious duties in Families , is an excellent means for the rendering of Publick Ordinances more successful . I am persuaded , there would much more good come of that precious Seed which the faithful Ministers of Christ scatter in their several Congregations , were Masters and Mistresses of Families careful before they come to prepare the Soil for the Seed , and after it is sown , careful to cover it with Prayer , and to water it with suitable discourses and exhortations . Thorough the Divine Goodness and Bounty there is in this City , and near it , a great deal of excellent Preaching . Confident I am , no Place in the World can shew such plenty . Heavenly Manna doth abundantly fall about our Tents . Whatsoever there is of a scarcity as to Bread for the Body , there is no Famine here ( oh that in every poor Countrey there were none neither ! ) of hearing the Word of the Lord. We have it upon the Lord's day , and the week days too , every day in the week one where or other within your reach ; blessed be God for it , the joyful sound is continually in our Ears . It would be a thousand pities , that such admirable plenty of a thing so precious as the Everlasting Gospel should do any hurt , and that any should wax wanton , and instead of the Bread of Life , be hankering after Mushrooms and Kickshaws , or that they should grow nice and curious , not relishing plain Truths , and the Simplicity of the Gospel , unless it be dress'd and sauc'd to their humour , and serv'd up to them in words which Man's Wisdom teacheth . Though I fear we have among us too many of that mind , mark , how they live , and what becomes of them ; but be that how it will , it must be granted , that this place where God hath cast our Lines , is a Goshen , a Valley of Vision , and a great many People are much , very much for hearing of Sermons ; they run up and down to Lectures , and some of them will hear four Sermons , and much good may they do them : It is a great encouragement to the Servants of God , and a ground of hope that they shall catch some of them for their Master . He hath made them Fishers of Men , and the Fisher-men love to cast their Net where there is a great Shoal . But I would say to these who do so much frequent Sermons , two things . First ; By way of Advice ; Look to your whole Duty ; and labour to stand compleat in all the Will of God. Hearing is not the whole work of a Christian . The Scripture indeed saith , Hear and your Souls shall live ; but if you would live , you must do something more than hear . Your much hearing is a sign of a good Appetite ; but there are some Bodies that have a caninum Appetitum , a greedy , ravenous Appetite , and yet are meer Skelletons , nothing but Skin and Bone : You that have so great an Appetite , will do well to look to it that you also have a good Concoction . Under the Law those Beasts were by God declared clean that did chew the Cud. Hear , and then ruminate ; do not only let Truths come crouding into your Ears , for then one may thrust out another , but ponder them in your hearts , as Mary the Mother of our Lord did , and hide them there as David did . You should spend some considerable time in meditation , that so , what Truths you have heard you may chafe in and work upon your hearts . Secondly ; I would speak unto you by way of Question , thus ; When you spend all your time in hearing abroad , what is done at home ? Where are Family-duties ? who is it that prays there ? who teaches and catechizes the young ones there ? Know , O Soul ! no good thing , is thy duty out of season ? nor art thou to prog for thy self by robbing thy house : And know this also , we that are Preachers of the Gospel , have but little hope of doing much good upon your Children and Servants by our Labours in the Church , if you who are Governours over them , and have the power , will be careless and negligent , and do nothing at home : How can we think that they will follow our counsels , when you will not second them ? Alas ! their weak leaking Memories let them slip , and their corrupt Natures reject them . There had need be Precept upon Precept , Precept upon Precept , Line upon Line , Line upon Line , here a little and there a little ; and all little enough , yea and all too little , unless accompanied and set home by the All-conquering Power of the Eternal Spirit . God indeed can do his work alone , needs neither you nor us ; but as he did by his own Word without Means and Instruments , call the World out of nothing , and raise Lazarus out of his Grave ; so he can by the same Power , in the same Way convert most obstinate Sinners , and turn the disobedient to the wisdom of the Just , or if he please to make use of Ministers for that end ; he can make them prosperous . He honours us by imploying us , and if he will doubly honour us , by making us successful , no difficulty shall be insuperable , no opposition an impediment ; great Mountains in our way shall sink into Plains , and Iron-Gates shall be opened . His concurrence is enough alone ; through God the Weapons of our Warfare will become mighty , so that strong holds shall be demolished , and imaginations cast down , carnal reasonings silenced and subdued , together with those high things that exalt themselves against the knowledge of God , and every thought brought into captivity to the obedience of Christ ; 2 Cor. 10.4 . And therefore though some , though many of you stand idle with your hands in your bosoms , we will into the Vineyard , and follow our business as long as we have any , being sure our Labour shall not be in vain , something will come of it . Though Israel be not gathered , yet shall we be glorious . But , as Paul said in another case ; Phil. 4.17 . We desire fruit that may abound to your account , and to the account of yours , even the Salvation of you all , the Conversion of the Youths , and from thence Comfort to the Parents . And as we love our work , so we would do it with delight , and we shall do so when you set your hands to it , because when all hands are at work , we may the more hope that God will work together with us , and that his Spirit and Blessing shall accompany our joynt-endeavours ; and while we prophesie upon dry Bones , he will cause breath to enter into them , so that they shall live . Up , therefore , I beseech you , up and be doing ; come ye forth to the help of the Lord and of his Servants against that gross Darkness , those corrupt Principles that are in the Minds of Young ones , and those potent Lusts that are in their Hearts . Do you teach as well as we , that they may know the Lord ; do you back our wholesom and holy Counsels , that they may follow them . And while the Masters of the Assemblies come with their Nails of Truth which were given by one Shepherd , even Jesus Christ , who is the great Shepherd of the Sheep , and take much pains for the driving of them home ; in order to the uniting them to God by Faith , and to one another by Love ; do you , who are Parents and Governours , come with your Hammers , and do what you can toward the fastening of them ? I am now at length come to the end of this discourse , wherein I undertook to prove , That setting up the Worship and Service of God in our Families , is no other than our reasonable service . Whether I have performed what I undertook , you will judge , and what evidence there is in the proof ; if I do not mistake , you will find it clear and full . And now , my dear Friends ▪ may I hope , I am indeed very willing to hope , and I shall be exceeding glad to hear , that by all these pains that I have taken , and all these Arguments which I have used , some of you , who have been altogether strangers to this work hitherto , and liv'd in the total neglect thereof , have been persuaded the doing thereof is without question your duty ; and that therefore it is your present , yea your fixed Resolution through the Grace and Assistance of God to set upon the doing of it . And that since you are convinced and satisfied about it in your Judgments , and your own Consciences do vote and plead for it , you will take it into your practice . The good Lord grant it may be so . And I bless his Name , I do hear something to that purpose , and that these Labours have not been in vain ; oh ! that I might hear more and more , that so my Joy both in the Lord and in you might be increased . Will you begin this Evening , I say , this Evening , for delays in Soul-matters are by no means to be allowed . Whatsoever is Duty ought to be done , and if it ought to be done , why not presently ? Possibly you think afterward will be soon enough , but God is not of your mind . He saith in Psal. 95. To day if ye will hear his voice , harden not your hearts ; and when God saith , to day , what art thou that thou shouldst say , to morrow ? Come , my Friends , that sooner the better . Hath not the great Majesty of Heaven waited long enough upon you for his Service and Honour ? oh do not make him wait any longer ! It is a dangerous thing to abuse Mercy , and tire out Divine Patience . Wo be to that Man , concerning whom God saith , My Spirit shall no more strive with him , and my Patience shall no longer wait upon him . Do not therefore in this or the like case consult with flesh and blood ; make not carnal Reason your Counsellor ; listen not to Objections , though never so seemingly fair and plausible , for there is no sufficient Argument to be brought against any thing which really is a matter of Duty , whether you owe it to God or Man. All this while I have been speaking to you altogether in generals , but now I shall descend to particulars , and here with all the earnestness that I possibly can use , I shall exhort you to these three things , and give you some Directions for your help in the doing of them . 1. To pray with your Families . 2. To teach and instruct your Families . 3. To set them a good Example in your own Lives and Conversations in order to the keeping or banishing sin and profaneness out of them , together with the promoting of Morality and Godliness in them . I shall begin with the great Duty of Family-prayer , and oh ! that I might through the Grace of God persuade you all into the practice of it ! Oh , that from this very day there may not be found one prayerless Family among you ! For I do not doubt to affirm , that which is a prayerless Family , is also a graceless Family . Where there is no seeking of God , there is no love to him , no fear of him . And that Family which is void of the Grace of God , is without his Blessing ; and though there may be outward Plenty and Grandeur in it , and the Sun of worldly Prosperity may shine upon it , yet it stands open and exposed to the Wrath and Indignation of God , who is , and cannot but be angry with it every day , seeing himself slighted and neglected by his own Creatures who live upon him , and receive their All from him . And there is standing upon Record in the Sacred Scriptures , a dreadful Prayer against those Families which do not pray ; let those that are guilty read it and tremble ; for as it was indited by the Spirit of God , so it shall be fulfilled by the Iustice of God ; Ier. 10.25 . Pour out thy Fury upon the Heathen that know thee not , and upon the Families that call not upon thy Name . The Families that do not call upon God's Name , do not know him ; for as those that know his Name will put their trust in him , so they will seek him ; and they may very well be reckoned Heathen-Families , though they are Christian by a verbal Profession . Christians in Name , but Heathens in practice ; and over these Families there hangs a great black Cloud of Divine Vengeance , which at one time or another will disgorge and empty it self upon them ; there shall not only be some little small drops of Anger , but the pouring out of Fury ; and methinks danger should be enough to drive you to Duty ; though he is not ingenuous , not of a right temper who is moved by no other consideration . I would have you walk with God , and in the way of your Duty , not for wrath only or chiefly , but for Conscience sake ; not only that you might avoid being bound in Chains of Wrath , but because you are allur'd and drawn with the cords of kindness . Though we may , and should use all the Arguments we can muster , and those of all sorts for the persuading of our dull and heavy hearts , that are so backward unto that which is spiritually good ; to that end therefore consider , you have Family-sins , and therefore ought to joyn together in your confessing of them , mourning over them , and humbling your selves before God for them ; and you have Family-sorrows and afflictions , and therefore should be joynt-suitors to God both for the sanctifying of them to you , and for the removal of them from you ; and you have Family-mercies in which you do all share , and of which you tast the sweetness , and therefore you should all bear your parts in a Song of Praise , and chearfully joyn together in your acknowledgments of them , and thankful returns to the God that gives them . And withal , be sure of this , that if you do exclude Family-prayer , you shut out God himself , and at the same time you open the door to the Devil , and let in together with him a croud of sins , and , by conseqence of mischiefs . Therefore I beseech you mind and resolve upon the great and excellent work of Family-prayer , yea , and make Conscience of performing it . And in order to the better management thereof , I shall give you these following Directions , which I desire you to observe , and the good Lord grant you an heart to follow them . I. Live in the performance of Secret Prayer . When you are in your Retirements , be upon the ascent , when you are alone , be with God. You that are Parents and Masters of Families , do this your selves , and heartily commend it to all under your care , your Servants and your Children which are in a capacity of doing it , which you will not find to be any detriment or loss to you . For this you have an express Command from our dearest Lord Jesus Christ ; Matth. 6.6 . Thou , when thou prayest enter into thy Closet , and when thou hast shut thy door , pray to thy Father which seeth in secret , and thy Father which seeth in secret will reward thee openly . He doth not here take you off from praying with others , but he puts you on praying by your selves ; that is not to be neglected , and this is to be done ; therefore do you allow them time for it who are under your roof . Let the Husband pray by himself , and the Wife by her self , the Children apart , and the Servants apart . It was a dreadful thing when in the 8th of Ezekiel the Lord in a Vision carried the Prophet from place to place , and in them all he shewed him abominations ; in one place there was the Image of Iealousie , in another place the form of creeping things , Beasts , and all the Idols of the House of Israel pourtray'd upon the Wall ; in a third place Women weeping for Tammuz ; and in a fourth place there were others worshipping the Sun toward the East . Idolatry was committed in all those places ; hereupon God threatens to dwell with them in Fury . But how sweet will it be , when God looks into your houses , and sees the Husband praying in one room , and the Wife in another , a Child upon his knees pouring its supplications out before him here , and a a Servant doing it there ; this is the way to have him dwel with you in mercy , and according to the exceeding riches of his Grace . I desire you that are Servants , to redeem some time for this work , though you have enough to do , your heads , and hearts , and hands full , yet get some minutes for this ; for so you may comfortably expect , that when you are about the business of your Calling , God will strengthen you the more for it , and bless you the better . Wrest some time out of the hand of sleep . Wrestling with God is better than an idle slothful lazying . It is a thousand times better to break thy natural Rest , than to lose thy Duty . One quarter of an hours hearty , fervent , and believing Prayer , will more revive thy spirits , and be a far greater refreshing to thy Soul , than an hours drousing , and render thee more lively , more good , more comfort is to be got upon thy knees , than upon the pillow ; therefore rouze up thy self , awake thy Soul and Body , and say with David ; Psal. 61.1 . O God my God! early will I seek thee . Get up , get up the sooner in the Morning , take unto thee the wings of the Morning , and flee away , that so thou maist get up to thy God and be with him . Let me mention two things by way of Motive . First ; The sweetness that is in Secret Prayer . You Christians that have tasted it , make your reports , and commend it to your Friends and Acquaintance , tell them what you have found . David would not conceal the Loving-kindness of his God , but invited others to come and hear what had been done for his Soul ; so to do argues a thankful spirit , and in this very particular many of you may find abundant matter to inlarge upon ; for it is no jejune barren Subject . It is a most pleasant Converse that a gracious Soul hath when it is alone with God ; O the intimacy and closeness of that Communion which it enjoys when there is no body else by ! O the humble familiarity and holy freedom that it can at such a time use ! The Prophet said ; Psal. 39.1 . He would keep his mouth with a Bridle while the wicked was before him . Yea and Prudence will tell the Saints , there is a necessity for their doing so when the Saints are before them , and their dearest Friends ; they are forced to suppress many things , there are such black thoughts in their minds , such stirrings and workings of corruption in their Heart as are not fit to be imparted unto any upon Earth . So that though their Hearts are ready to burst , they cannot ease themselves by giving vent , but when they are got alone , and no body hears but their Father which is in Heaven , they know how to pour out their complaints into his Bosom , and open their case , though with shame and blushing , because it is so bad , and fetch things up from the bottom , and tell God all that is in their Hearts , Psal. 38.9 . Lord , all my desire is before thee , and my groaning is not hid from thee . Secondly ; There is great advantage comes in by secret Prayer . As sweetness in it , so good by it , and that in this respect , as it is a means to fit a Person for praying with others ; when thou hast been upon thy knees with God in thy Closet , thou maist comfortably hope that thou shalt find him graciously accompanying thee into thy Family , and there helping thine infirmities by giving thee a larger measure of the Spirit of Grace and Supplication for thy better inablement to manage and go thorough with thy Duty there . When Scholars at the University have a Speech to make in the Colledge or Schools , they will say it over by themselves first . Chase thy own Soul in thy Retirements , that so thou maist be warm and warm others in thy Family . Now in the performance of your private Devotion I commend to you an holy freedom , and that in these two things . First ; Be very ingenuous in your Confession of sin ; this is one great special piece of your Duty . It is a singular way of giving glory to God , and of easing a burden'd , oppressed Conscience . When therefore you go about it do it thoroughly ; confess thy sins with shame , but be not asham'd to confess them ; he that covers his sin shall not prosper , no , not in that , not in his covering them , for what he covers God will reveal , who loves to bring to light the hidden things of dishonesty . There are two Reasons for a free and full confession of sin to God ; the one is , Because it is in vain to keep back any , since he knows them all , for he searcheth the Heart ▪ possesseth the Reins , understands the Thoughts afar off , compasseth the path , knoweth our down-sitting and up-rising , is better acquainted with us than we are with our selves , having our secret Sins in the light of his Countenance . The other Reason is , Because he is ready to forgive , and hath promised , whoso confesses and forsakes his sins shall find mercy , as much mercy in God as he finds sin in himself . Doth the penitent Confessor find crying sins in himself ? He shall find tender mercies in God , yea , a multitude of them . Secondly ; Be large in thy desires . Let not modesty prevail against thy necessity , and hinder thee in thy begging , but open thy Mouth wide to ask as well as to receive . Consider you go to one that is a Fountain , never emptied by the streams it sends forth , to one that hath an inexhaustible Treasure , and doth not in the least impoverish or lessen himself by inriching of others . The Sun hath never the less light by shining upon the World , nor hath the Ocean less Water by feeding the Rivers . God is able to make thy Cup run over , and thy Cistern too ; yet retain his own Divine Fulness ▪ which can neither be more nor less than it is , because it is infinite . And as thou goest to such a Fulness , so to one that is thy Father . It might well discourage and damp thy Spirit hadst thou to deal with a Stranger , or only with a Friend , but it is thy Father to whom thou dost in Prayer address , such a Father as hath not his Fellow neither for Fulness nor Affection . Therefore when thou art in his Presence , and at his Foot speak out , and carry away no burden nor want which thou dost not acquaint him therewith ; let him have as full an account of all from thine own Mouth as thou canst draw up , that is the way to have the removal of those burdens , and relief under those wants , and for thine encouragement frequently meditate upon those two Scriptures , Iam. 1.5 . God giveth unto all men liberally , and upbraideth not ; and that in Phil. 4.19 . My God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Iesus Christ. II. Besides secret Prayer in your Closet or Chamber , make Conscience of Family-prayer . Having been alone with God , and by thy self , sit not down content with that ; but apply to the remaining part of thy Duty , call those that are under thy charge , and carry them to God together with thee . As when the woman of Samaria had heard the discourses of our Lord Jesus , while they were by themselves , she was so taken with them , that she left her Water-pot , and went to the City , and called her Neighbours to come and see him , and converse with him too . Would you not be willing to have your Family go to God in glory ? Sure you would , and if so , then bring them now with you to God in duty : All that are capable of joining with you , and of understanding what you do and say ; yea , bring your little ones , your young and tender Babes , so that they will be quiet , and give you no disturbance in the work , that so you may , First ; Present your selves before the Lord , offering and dedicating them to him . Secondly ; Enter them early , and from the Cradle in his Service . Thirdly ; Beg a Blessing from God upon them , though they cannot beg one for themselves . If you will consult the Scriptures , you will find that God's ancient People , the Iews , did bring sometimes their Children with them to the great Congregations . Take two instances of it , one of them you have in Deut. 29.10 , 11. All Israel did appear before the Lord when Moses made a Covenant with them in the Land of Moab . Now read what Moses there said to them , Ye stand all of you this day before the Lord your God , your Captains of your Tribes , your Elders , and your Officers , with all the men of Israel , your little ones , your Wives , and thy stranger that is in thy Camp , from the hewer of thy Wood , unto the drawer of thy Water . Not only the Males but the Females , not only the great and honourable Men but the meanest , not only the Fathers , but the Children , not only those that were grown up , but the little ones were brought before the Lord , to enter into Covenant with him , and into the Oath which the Lord their God made with them that day . So when in Ezra 9. the Princes came to that holy Man , and told him , the people of Israel , and the Priests and the Levites had not separated themselves from the people of the Lands , but taken their Daughters for themselves , and for their Sons also ; so that the holy Seed had mingled themselves with the people of the Lands , the good Man upon the hearing thereof rent his Garment , and his Mantle , and pluck'd off the Hair of his Head , and of his Beard , and sate down astonied , at the Evening Sacrifice he fell upon his Knees , and spread out his Hands unto the Lord his God , blushing , and professing himself ashamed to lift up his Face to God , because of that great trespass which had been committed by the people , though he himself was not guilty of it . Now consult Ezra 10.1 . and you find there , when he had prayed , and when he had confessed , weeping , and casting himself down before the House of God , there assembled unto him a very great Congregation of men , and women , and children , for the people wept very sore . The poor Children were brought as Persons concern'd , as those who were obnoxious to the stroke of Justice , and might perish in a common Calamity brought upon that sinning and God-provoking People . So that it was no childish thing in them to bring their Children with them to such serious and solemn work ; there was much in it as might easily be shewn . Now let these Examples prevail so far with you as to bring your Children with you to your Family-duties , there present them before the Lord ; for though they can do nothing to the duty , yet you cannot tell what God may do upon and in them ; he hath a way to their Hearts , and can do that good work in them which neither they nor you do know now , but both they and you may know it afterward . Therefore though they cannot pray themselves , though they cannot understand what you say in your Prayers , yet let them be present at them ; there they are under the Eye of God , and he may bestow upon them a look of love ; they are in the way of mercy , and it may give them a visit ; the Prayers you cause to ascend may gather into a Cloud over you , and when that pours down a shower of Blessings , some drops may fall upon your little ones . And since you should bring your little ones to Prayer , it is plain that you ought to call those to it that are elder and grown up , and have attained to the use and exercise of their Reason , your Sons and your Daughters , your Man-servants and your Maid-servants , invite them to come in , call them , exhort them , shew the goodness of it , the excellency and necessity of it , perswade them , draw them with the Cords of a Man ; if they , or any of them be careless , refractory , obstinate , command them to come in , compel them to come in , use that power and authority with which God hath invested you . Do not suffer any of them to absent themselves from one Prayer without just cause . Let them not eat of your Bread , nor live under your Roof , who will not join with you in the service of your God. You have in this Discourse heard , and now read much concerning the noble and gracious Resolution taken up by that great and excellent Person Ioshua in the Text , As for me and my house we will serve the Lord. I will do it , and they shall ; I and all mine , my House , my whole House , every Individual Person in it . Let none serve you that will not serve your God as well as you . For mine own part , I never was a Friend to Impositions , and I think and hope never shall be : Not for Mens adding their Inventions to Divine Institutions , and then requiring all to submit and comply with them . Let themselves use them , yea , and all those that like them , only may they grant liberty to such as are otherwise minded , and count that worship best , most pleasing , most profitable , and most glorious , which is of God's own appointment . But I am for requiring what God hath required ; it is the duty of Magistrates in Nations , and of Governours in Houses to see that Gods Laws be observ'd and obey'd ; and therefore be you very careful in that respect , and strictly command all under you to be constantly present . If any of them will not let them know your displeasure , and that you will not endure it ; whether they refuse to join with you out of a Spirit of Errour , with which too many at this day are acted , or out of a Spirit of Profaneness , it is all one for that ; if they will not with you seek and serve the Lord , let them not continue in your House , nor tarry in your sight ; they are no other than Plagues in your Families , and may spread the Infection , others are in danger from them . They are rotten Members , cure them , or cut them off ; bring all to Prayer . III. Be sure to make Family-prayer the work of every day . God loves your Company , therefore be not strangers to him . He never thinks you come to him too often , why then should you go but seldom ? Do not content your selves with praying only upon the Lord's-day , and bringing all your service of God within the compass of a Sabbath , as if the other six days were so your own , and for your own work , that you must spare none of them for God. This indeed , as I have been informed , is the manner of some among us ; upon a Lord's-day they will call their Families together , and then they will do something for God ; but they must give me leave to think , what they do then is pitifully , shamefully done ; they are so seldom us'd to it that they must needs bungle at it ; and let me ask you , my Friends , are these Persons liberal to God ? Nay , are they not very beggarly and penurious , who will give him a visit upon that day which he hath reserved wholly and entirely for himself , and set about it the Hedge of a command to keep all secular Affairs from intruding or breaking in upon it ? But they will not part with any of that time which he hath allowed them for the dispatch of their own business ; but their Work and Recreations , their Eating , Drinking and Sleeping shall ingross it all ; in short , the Language of their practice is this , they will pray a little when they have nothing else to do , or when there is nothing else that they may do ; but the Law commands them to shut up their Shops , and to lay by their worldly Trades , but , my Friends , is this fair ? Do not you rob God of some of his time ? Why then will you not return him some of your own ? Do not you commit too many sins upon a Sabbath-day , and will you not do some duty upon a Week-day ? Do you mingle sin with your holy things , and will you not mingle Prayer and holy Thoughts with your earthly things ? Is this to continue instant in Prayer ? Is this to pray without ceasing ? Is this paying due homage to the Lord of your time and comforts ? Is this enough for depending Creatures who cannot live a day without God , no , not a moment ? The truth is , Love to God should draw us frequently that we may have Communion with him , and necessity might drive us that we may have supplies from him ; all your Springs are in him , with him is the Well of Life , therefore let down your Bucket of Prayer often , that you may draw Water with joy . You may observe that in the Lord's Prayer which Christ gave his Disciples for an excellent pattern or example by which we all should draw up ours , he teacheth us to say , Our Father , that speaks Communion , and a joining together in Prayer ; one Saint , one Child of God may go alone to the Throne of Grace and say , Father . or , O my Father , but , Our Father , speaks Society and Fellowship in the duty : That there are more Suitors , more concerned than one . And further observe , that there our Lord bids us say , Give us this day our daily bread ; from whence we may gather these three things . First ; He bids us pray for Bread. Temporal good things are to be sought of God. The Dew of Heaven , yea , and the Fatness of the Earth , Provision for our Souls , and Food for our Bodies too ; we are to seek God , and rely upon him in and for the greatest things , and also the least . In every thing by Prayer and Supplication we are to make our Request known to God. We cannot get our Bread unless God gives it to us . Secondly ; He bids us pray for Bread , not for Dainties , not Sweet-meats , not Venison , not Varieties , Necessaries are to be sought , not Superfluities ; nothing to feed our Pride , nor to spend upon our Lusts. Feed me , said wise and holy Agar , with food convenient for me ; that which is suitable to the place in which thou hast set me . Seek not great things for your selves , for those great things may prove great snares . Thirdly ; He bids us to say , Give us this day our daily Bread. We are to pray for Bread for to day , supplies for to day ; and we are to say that , or something to the same purpose every day . He doth not bid us pray that God would give us Bread for this Week , or for this Month , or for this Year , or for twenty Years to come , but give us this day , and we are to say so to morrow as well as to day , and the day after that as well as to morrow , and so it is to run thorough the whole course of Life . Every day we are to say , Give us this day , &c. that is , as we desire to have our Bread of God every day , we must ask it every day ; daily Bread and daily Prayer must go together . God doth love to answer the occasions of his People , and to supply their wants ; He giveth meat to them that fear him , because he is ever mindful of his Covenant , Psal. III. 5 . but he stands upon his honour , and expects to be owned , and therefore said , he would be sought to by the House of Israel to do it for them , I have read this Story of an Heathen , whose Name I cannot for the present call to mind , that when he had at any time passed a day without doing some Act of Charity or Mercy , he would in the evening sit down bemoaning himself , and cry out , perdidi diem , I have lost a day . Truly it is so here ; thou mayest at night with bitterness of Soul reflect upon that day which thou hast spent without Family-Prayer , and say , perdidi diem , I have lost a day ; and he that knows the shortness , the uncertainty , the worth of time , and how much depends upon the right improvement thereof , will reckon the loss of a day to be a very great loss , and we are wont to say , one loss seldom goes alone ; what thou dost lose besides that , God only knows ; what communion with God , what answers , what manifestations of Divine Love , what communications of Grace , what Blessings , therefore I beseech you all to make Conscience of Praying in your Families every day . And if at any time , through forgetfulness or surprize of any kind , or being oppress'd with business crowding in upon thee , thou art so hindered that thou canst not perform thy duty , but the Season is as it were violently wrested out of thy hands ; bewail the loss , sigh and mourn over it , let God see thou art afflicted for it , and not pleas'd with thy self , or the avocation ; and long for another opportunity , in which thou mayest go and appear before thy God ; and when once it comes , welcome it with gladness , and lay hold upon it , thy Soul being like the Chariots of Amminadib , and then confess thy former omission , and beg thy Father to cast the Mantle of his love over it , and then double thy diligence , and thy hea● , then spend the more time , and put forth the greater strength , then do thou follow the harder after God , and keep the closer to him , and let it be thy desire to make up that which was lacking before , that so neither thy God may lose his honour , nor thy self , nor thy Family the good and benefit of a duty ; but like the Sea , what Religion loseth at one time , it may gain at another . IV. Be sure that you Pray in your Families Morning , and Evening . I would not have you from hence conclude my design is to render you so strait lac'd as not to pray oftner than so , to do this , and take up with doing it , making that your stint , your allowance , resolved not to exceed ; no , no , it is your interest to study liberal things in your dealings with God , for by liberal things you shall stand ; you cannot be too much with God , nor do too much for him ? you cannot pray too much , so that you have a prudent and cordial respect to all his Commands , and to all the parts of your Duty , not suffering one to justle out another ; as the Body is not all one Member , so Religion is not all one Duty , it doth not consist altogether in Prayer , nor altogether in Hearing ; and as that is a lame Body which wants one Member , so he is a lame Christian that is careless as to any one piece of Religion , such a wilful defect is a great deformity . Set your hand to all the work of God , and in particular be much in Prayer ; David gave himself unto Prayer , as a Man much set for it , and devoted to it ; Daniel the Man greatly beloved of his God , was at it three times in a day , Dan. 6.10 . His Windows being opened in his Chamber toward Ierusalem , he kneeled upon his knees three times in a day , and prayed and gave thanks before his God , as he did afore-time . He loved Prayer so well , that neither danger nor death , no , not a violent death , being cast into a Den of Lyons could affright and deter him from it . David , the Man after Gods own heart , was much more at it , Psalm 119.164 . Surely he had great encouragement so to do from his experience , he sensibly felt that it very greatly tended to his advantage , he saw begging was a good trade , he did thrive upon it , and therefore he follow'd it close , the oftner he went to God , the more he got from him , and of him ; he never rose off his knees , nor returned from the Throne of Grace without an Alms. The most Praying Christian , is certainly the most growing Christian , as he hath his expectations , I will direct my Prayer unto thee , and will look up ; so he hath his answers , and sees something is coming ; but let the Morning and Evening of every day be your stated and set times for Prayer , there is a great deal of reason for that , viz. First , The Divine Order and Appointment , of this we did before take notice ; in Exod. 29. God required there should be two Lambs offered up every day in Sacrifice , the one in the morning , and the other in the Evening , which was called the continual Burnt-Offering ; and shall we be exceeded and out-done by them ? shall the dispensation now be more glorious , and shall we be more penurious that live under it ? shall God now more magnifie his grace , and shall we grow poorer in our returns ? their Sacrifices were more costly and chargeable , and shall ours be fewer ? surely since in the times of Messiah there is a more plentiful effusion of the Spirit , there should at least be an equal abounding in the work of the Lord ▪ our Sacrifices of Prayer and Praise , the Calves of the Lips , and the lifting up of our Hearts and hands to God , should be as frequent as those bloody Sacrifices . Secondly , This Practice is commended to us in the Scripture , we are directed to think upon those things that are of good report . Now this hath obtained a good report in the World , and as it is with Men , so it is with things , to be well spoken of by the word , is more than to have all the World speak well of one ; look then into the 92 d Psalm 1. v. It is a good thing to give thanks unto the Lord , and to sing Praises to thy Name , O thou most High ; to bless God , to exalt God , to give him glory , is good , it is duty , it is the employment of Angels , the Work of Heaven , and Eternity , and those that have good hearts will delight in good work . If you would know what are the fittest and most convenient times for the doing of this good work , for that tends much to the adorning and setting off a work , every thing being beautiful in its season . He tells you in the next words , to shew forth thy loving kindness in the Morning , and thy faithfulness every night ; and when we do in the sincerity of our Souls thus begin and end our days , we are like to find them good throughout . Thirdly , God visits us every Morning , it is no less than Gods humbling himself to behold those things which are above , the glorious Angels , much more to look upon Man , sorry dust , what is it then for God to visit him ? the Prophet admired it , Psal. 8 4. What is Man that thou art mindful of him , or the Son of Man that thou visitest him ? Great Princes are not wont to go into a Beggars Hovil , they reckon it below them , but the Great God stoops much lower ; and Oh! how necessary is this for us , Iob 10.12 . Thy Visitation hath preserved my Spirit . By this he meant a gracious Visitation , a Friendly one , this reviv'd him , this preserv'd him , his Spirit , his Life , his Courage , his Comforts , all were upheld and maintain'd by the gracious visitations of God. Again , how frequent are these with us ? how many gracious Visits doth God bestow upon his poor People ? Iob 7.18 . Thou visitest him every morning , there is never a Morning that we miss him , as often as the Morning returns , God comes to visit us , yea , he is with us before we are up ; and since Gods visits are so frequent , shall ours be few ? shall he come to see us , and see to us , and shall not , we wait upon him ? shall the strangeness be on our side ? let us visit God every Morning , and pay him visit for visit , and let us be sure to carry our Family with us , for so we shall be the more welcome . Fourthly , The continuation and constant succession of Mercies doth oblige to this , and call for it ; Gods Mercies are new every Morning upon us , and shall not our returns ? shall we not follow hard after him , and delight in our approaches to him , when he draws us with the Cords of a Man , yea , with loving-kindness ; the very pouring out of his Name , which is as a precious Oyntment , should make us love and run after him ; Oh! let the pouring out of his Grace and Mercy do it . Day unto Day utters speech , and Night unto Night sheweth knowledge , and one would think that when both Day and Night speak in the Language of Love , we should answer them , and not be silent . God soweth his Seed in the Morning , and in the Evening he witholdeth not his hand ; and surely that Heart and House is a very barren Soil , and near unto a Curse , that doth not twice a day pay its acknowledgments to him . Lastly , methinks there is not any one who hath the use of reason , and believes a God , but hath a Monitor in his own bosom to prompt him to this , and not need a Minister in a Pulpit to press it upon him , or a Friend at his elbow to jog him , your own reason should and would direct you to it , if you did but consult and hearken to it . It is fit that we should make God the Alpha , and the Omega , the first and the last , for so he is , and therefore we ought to begin and end our day , and other things too with God : we cannot rationally expect to prosper , if we do not begin with him , and in case we do not end with him , our labour may be lost , and all that we have done may ravel out again . Our necessities would engage and spur us on to this . In the Morning we should seek him for direction , assistance , and blessing upon the work and business of the day . For Direction , else we shall mistake our way , and lose our selves , it not being in him that walketh to direct his steps ; he that thinks himself wise enough to be his own guide , will find himself a Fool for thinking so . For assistance , because in him we live , and move , and have our being , and without him we can do nothing ; nothing supernatural , nothing natural , the concurrence of his grace is necessary to all our Spiritual and holy actions : the concurrence of his providence is as necessary to all our natural and civil actions ; if he subduct from us we cannot stir a finger , nor move a foot . And for a Blessing , for upon that all our success depends , we had as good sit still if we take not God along with us ; Solomon tell us in one place , the diligent hand makes Rich ; in another place , that the blessing of the Lord makes Rich ; the former can never do it without the latter . In the Evening we should beg of him Protection , for it is his hedge that secures us , his wing that covers us , Psal. 4.8 . Thou , Lord , only makest me to dwell in safety , no Guard comparable to a God ; beg of him rest and sleep , for it is he that with a tender hand closeth the eye , and binds up the senses , and giveth his beloved sleep , beg of him refreshing by that sleep , else you will have sick sleeps , and disorder'd Spirits , and akeing heads after them . Once more , our daily receivings do oblige us to the offering up of this our Morning and Evening Sacrifice . In the Morning we are in gratitude bound to bless him for watching over us while we slept , and that with a never-slumbering Eye , and for his not holding our Eyes waking , of which poor Asaph complain'd , Psal. 77.4 . And that you are not in the same case with poor Iob in Iob 7.13 , 14. Who , when he said , his bed should comfort him , and his couch should ease his complaint , was scar'd with dreams , and frighted with visions . We have cause to bless God in the Morning , that when we sought rest in our Beds we found it there , and that our sleep was not our terrour . And again in the Evening we have cause to bless God for the help of the day , that he directed , and strengthen'd , and prosper'd us in the work of our Heads and Hands , and for the Mercies of the day , Health , Ease , Relations , Friends , Food , Raiment , and that we relish our Enjoyments , and taste any sweetness in our Enjoyments ; for a little matter would vitiate and corrupt our Palates , and render our pleasant things as insipid and unsavoury to us as the white of an Egg , or a dry Chip , nay , bitter and loathsom , Iob 20.12 . His meat in his bowels is turn'd , it is the gall of asps within him . It is one thing to have outward Mercies , and another to have the comfort of them ; and these two go not always together , but are often separated ; when we have them both , surely we should be wickedly ungrateful if we do not own and honour him who is the Father of those Mercies , and the God of that Comfort . V. For the better offering up of these your Morning and Evening Sacrifices in and with your Families , be sure to make choice of the fittest and most proper time . God doth all his works in their time , so should we do ours ; that will be the Beauty of them . The blessed Man brings forth his Fruit in its Season , and that is lovely , pleasant Fruit. Now which is the most proper and convenient time for the Duty ; I shall not take upon me here to determine , for the occasions and circumstances of Families are various and different , yea , and not seldom those of the same Family ; wherefore the Governours of Families are to make use of their own Prudence and Discretion in the choice thereof ; you are most likely to know it best , only do you chuse that which is best ; and I shall lay down two Rules in general by which you may judge what is so . First ; That is the best time for Prayer , in which you can promise your selves the greatest freedom from all other business , and to meet with the fewest avocations from the work , and disturbances in it . Secondly ; That is the best time for Prayer , in which you find your selves in the best composure ; wherein your Minds and Hearts are in the fittest frame for the Duty , most serious , most spiritual , most lively , and have good reason to conclude , those who are to join with you in the work will be so too as well as your self . This is highly desireable , and in a special manner to be look'd to . A wise Man will see that his Instrument be in Tune before he will begin to play his Musick . Do you here see to it that your Hearts be in Tune , otherwise you cannot hope that your Prayer will be God's delight . Now here I must be plain with you , that I may be faithful to you ; and faithful I must be , because I am accountable , and how else shall I answer it to my Judge . I charge no body in particular , that would not be becoming in such a place , in such an Assembly ; but I draw my Bow at a venture , God himself direct the Arrow , that it may hit the mark , and pierce to the Heart of those who are guilty . And I do advise every one of you to reflect and search into your own Lives , and examine your Practices , and if your Consciences smite you , and say as Nathan to David , Thou art the Man , Thou the Woman , take it to your selves , and I give you free leave to think your selves the persons whom I meant , and that was said I intended to and for you , only , know it for your good . The God of Heaven accompany what I shall say with his Spirit and Blessing , and lay it on the sore place , and make it stick in order to the working of a Cure. There are , my Friends , two things , of which I am inform'd , and upon their account there are great thoughts of Heart among serious gracious Christians . One is that of unreasonable and unseasonable Gaming , I mean , in the houses of Professors , such as call themselves Christians , and would be counted the Friends and practisers of that Religion which is pure and undefiled before God and the Father ; as for others who are the Servants of Sin and Satan , I leave them to the righteous Judgment of God. But , as I have heard since I entred upon this Subject , there is in the houses of Professors sitting up at Cards till it is late , ten , eleven , twelve of the Clock at night , yea sometimes till morning : I ask them by the way , whether ever they sate up so long at prayer , or reading the Scripture ? Unto such persons I would only say these few things . First ; As touching the Game it self , I will not take upon me peremptorily to determine , that playing at Cards is utterly unlawful . Yet I do very well remember , that in former times when Professors liv'd more up to the Rules of Religion than most now do , and did not allow to themselves that latitude which many in our days take ; Cards were counted so by many godly learned Ministers and gracious Christians , and accordingly were then call'd , The Devil's Books , and the use of them for play was a thing of bad report , and to have a pack of them in the house was then reckoned scandalous . It is true , one of no small esteem for Learning and Piety ( whose Name I forbear to mention ) hath written for it ; but I humbly conceive , he had better have spar'd his pains . So pitiful a Cause did not deserve so Learned a Pen , so great a Patron ; and what he and others have said is not satisfactory , but still ( sub judice lis est ) the matter is disputable , and there are more against it than for it . And I am sure in matters questionable , such things as will admit of a debate , it is the wisdom of those who love their own Souls , and desire to approve themselves unto God by an holy exact walking before him , to forbear ; there may be sin in using , but for certain there is no danger in letting them alone . Though you are not sure there is Poison in a Glass of Wine , yet if you do suspect it you will not drink of it . Perhaps the company will jeer and laugh at you for your over-niceness , and let them till they be weary , better so , than to have your own Consciences raging and storming at you for your over-boldness . It is not good to rouze a sleepy Lion , a little matter will do it . But then , Secondly ; As to any other Game which is evidently lawful , and concerning which no dispute hath been raised among good men . Nature doth require , and God doth allow Recreations . The Bow that always stands bent will grow to be a Slug. And there are Recreations in themselves very innocent and harmless , that tend much to the health of the Body , and not to the detriment or prejudice of the Soul ; yet even in these you must manage your selves with wisdom , for otherwise you may sin in them . What the Apostle Paul saith of the Law ; 1 Tim. 1.8 . We know that the Law is good if a man use it lawfully . I may say in the present case , we know that Recreation is good if a man use it lawfully ; but withal we know that the greatest danger of real sincere Christians lieth inter licita , among things lawful ; and though the Recreations , which you use , are lawful in themselves , yet you may sin in the using of them , and that many ways ; particularly , in the using them out of season , and by being too long at them . Time is too precious a Jewel to be thrown away . Thirdly ; I desire you seriously to consider , whether Gaming be a good preparative for any holy duty . We have been wont to blame those that would upon the Lord's-day come reeking out of their Beds to Publick Ordinances ; and if I be not mistaken , they are as worthy of blame , who immediately go from their sports to the Service of God. Is this , my Friends , is this the way for People to get themselves into a fitness for duty , their hearts into a serious , solemn , spiritual and holy frame ? Is this the way to qualifie you for an appearance in so great and glorious a Presence as is that of God , and for engaging to so important and momentous a work as is that of Prayer ? You that love Recreations , do not love them too well ; and you that use them , let it be without abusing them ; do not make Play your work , but use it moderately , as becometh those who were sent hither for higher and nobler purposes than to sport upon Earth as Leviathan doth in the Sea ; and as becomes them who knows the shortness , uncertainty and preciousness of Time , and that your everlasting welfare and happiness in the other World depends upon a due improvement of it ; and as becomes those who believe you must at last render an account thereof unto the God that gave it to you . And I also advise you to take special , care that there be a sufficient interval or space of time between your Recreation and your Duty , that so you may call your thoughts in which you had given leave to ramble , and raise your Affections up , which had been too much deprest , and sunk to Objects so mean and low , and that by holy Meditation , spiritual Divine Contemplations , you may recover your former warmth , and chafe your selves into a due heat , and be fervent in spirit serving the Lord , remembring , it was in the flame of Manoahs Sacrifice that the Angel did wonderfully . Fourthly ; You that are Parents , I do earnestly desire you to think with your selves , and that seriously , whether you are kind to your Children in playing at Cards ; doth this speak your love to them , and care of them ? Is this the way to keep them from the path of the Destroyer , and to bring them up for God ? Doth this tend to the making of them gracious or serious ? Do you think in your Consciences that you would be willing Death should come and find you so employed , that Death should come and take you at Cards ? Or do you think in your Consciences , that you do herein set your Children a good Example . Really this deserves your thoughts ; for as we Ministers are to be Examples to the Flock , so you Parents and Governours ought to be to your Families . What manner of persons then should you be in all holy conversation , in all the actions of your Lives ? and are you so exemplary when you play at Cards , as it becomes and concerns you to be ? Possibly , some of you think you have enough to say for your selves , viz. that you do not make a Trade of it , nor a common practice , you do it but at one time of the year , when the Nights are long , and you know not how otherwise to pass away the time ; but by the way , do not say so , for that proclaims your egregious weakness and folly ) what ! have so great work to do , and so much of it , yet know not how to pass away the time ? or you satisfie your selves with this , that you do not play for Mony , at least not for much , so that upon that score you are much at a pass whether you win or not , and this may be , but you cannot tell what your Children may do after you ; you do shew them the way , and lead them in it , but they may shortly go a great deal farther than you your selves either do or dare to do ; because they see you play at Cards , they conclude it lawful , and that they may do so too ▪ and accordingly do , for Children are imitating Creatures , and by practising it , they may fall in love with it , for Childhood and youth are vanity , and by consequence very apt to follow after vanity , and in time they may come to love it so much , as to consume and spend their time in it , untill their purses be exhausted , their Estates dwindled and shrunk into nothing , and themselves with their Families reduced to beggery , and a morsel of bread , and at the same time their Souls are lost into the bargain ; and surely rather than that should come to pass , it is a thousand thousand times more desirable that all the Cards in London , in England , yea in the World , should with just indignation be Sacrificed in the Flames . In short , as to this , I beg of you that you would do justly , in giving to God the things which are Gods , and let not Cards nor any other game hinder his Work and Service , nor keep you from the performance of your Duty . Many have been undone by gaming , and thousands enrich'd by praying ; it was by this means that Iacob as a Prince had power with God and Men , and did prevail . Oh! that so much may suffice to be spoken to that complaint , and Oh! that God would accompany it with his Spirit , and Blessing . There is another thing which is indeed the matter of a general Complaint , and hath raised a great Cry that reached mine Ears , and the Ears of many of my Reverend Brethren ; and that which renders it so much a Gravamen , so grievous and afflictive to our spirits , and those of other persons truly fearing God , and concern'd for the Honour and Interest of our Religion , which deserves to be dearer to us than our Lives , is that it is the common , yea daily custom , not of the vile Debauchees of the Age , the wicked and profane Crew , from whom nothing is to be expected , that savours of goodness and sobriety , but even of sober Persons , grave Citizens , yea of Men eminent for their Profession , Members of Churches worshipping God in that way which so many unjustly labour to fix a black brand of Infamy upon ; but our Heavenly Advocate will one day plead our Cause , and bring forth the Righteousness of it as the Light. But the thing is , such Persons sitting so long as they do , at Publick houses of one kind or another , and spending there so much time , that it is nine , ten , yea and often eleven of the Clock at night , before they return to their home ; so deeply engaged are they in their Clubs , and Discourses , in telling and hearing of News . I bless God I very seldom hear of Professors and Members of Churches being charged with Drunkenness , Uncleanness , or other gross Immoralities , though I wish there were none of them guilty , and do fear there be some who are Spots in our Communion ; yet this we can say , we allow them not , and if we did know them , and there were just proof , we should proceed against them according to Scripture-Rule . Further to prevent my being mistaken , I shall say these two things . First ; I do not speak against mens inquiring after News , or their being desirous to inform themselves concerning the State of Affairs , and how matters go in the Nation , and abroad , and with the Church of God , specially in such a time as this . When the Army of Israel went out to War against the Philistines , good old Eli could not stay at home , but out he went and sate upon a Seat by the ways side , watching , for his heart trembled for the Ark of God ; 1 Sam. 4.13 . And I look upon it as a duty , yea , a necessary part of duty in us all , that so we may be accordingly affected , and the better understand how to order our Spirits , and demean our selves , and how to direct our Prayers and Praises unto God , that so there may be no unseemly discord and jarring between God's Providences and our Prayers , but an harmony and consent . Secondly ; I do not speak a word against Citizens having their Clubs , in order to the better and more prudent management of their Trades : this I am a stranger to and therefore do not meddle with ; for any thing I know it may be convenient for them , and profitable , and more than so , needful ; but for Men to sit in those places so long , and keep from their own houses till it be so late , is indeed blame-worthy , and calls loudly for a reformation , and oh ! that I could help toward it , I will do my endeavour , and in order thereunto , offer some things to your consideration . First , if any of you who are here present before the Lord , and are Husbands , be guilty of this thing , and make an ordinary practice thereof , I beseech you , when you are most calm and composed , seriously to reflect upon it , and think with your selves , whether this be kindness to your Wives ? Is this walking answerably to that near intimate conjugal relation into which you did voluntarily and of your own choice enter , promising to express all love and tenderness ? Is this living up to the Law , and doing the duty of that Relation ? Is this being as good as your word ? Is this your love and kindness to her , in whose Company and Converse you ought to delight above all others except Gods ? Is this to be a Comfort to her as you ought to be ? Think that while you are abroad Merry , Jocund , Pleasant , Delighting your self with your Friends and Wine , she for want of you is at home Melancholick , Concern'd , Afraid , Troubled lest you should Contract any Guilt , or come by any Hurt ; at least , she is solitary and alone . Secondly ; To that thought add another , While I am here doth not my Family want me ? May you not be more useful , and do much more good at Home , than you are capable of doing in one of those Publick Houses ? What becomes of your own Vineyard , which you are bound to keep ? Would it not turn to a better account , and prove far more advantagious both to you and yours to be teaching of your Family , commending God and Godliness to them , giving them good Counsels , instilling into them sound Principles , reading to them your selves , or hearing them read the Holy Scriptures , and other good Books , by which they may be richly furnished for good Works , and made wise to Salvation ; or Catechising them about the main Fundamental Points of Religion , and examining them as to their knowledge in the things of God , for want of due care wherein while they are young , many when they come to be grown up , prove unstable Souls , and an easie prey to them that lye in wait to deceive . Possibly you do not , and I will hope that you do not Drink to Excess in those Houses , nor spend too much Money upon them , who will not thank you for it afterward ; but what saist thou Conscience ? Speak out , to them , speak plain , do they not spend too much time there ? May they not spend it much better at home , and about something else ? Thirdly ; Suppose the great and holy God should come to you at such a time , and in such a place , would you not be startled at it , and afraid of him ? When Elijah in danger of his Life upon the rage and threatning of Iezabel had fled and hid himself in a Cave , the Lord came to him and said , What dost thou here Elijah ? 1 Kings 19. Suppose God should then and there come to thee , not in a great strong Wind , nor in an Earthquake , nor in a Fire , but in a gentle manner as he did to him , in a small still voice , and say , what dost thou here , O Man ? Is it not high time for thee to be at home ; honest Men should be so , specially such as call themselves by my name should be so , what then dost thou here ? Could you give a satisfactory account of it unto God ? Could you justifie and maintain it before God ? Could you with boldness answer , Lord , I am where I should be , I am where my work is ; I do not at all doubt , but such a question as this propounded by the most holy God would raise a blush in your Cheeks for shame , or cover your Face with paleness for fear ; it would leave you speechless ▪ and make you tremble ; it would cause rottenness to enter into your Bones , and teach you to make more haste home the next time . Well know , though God doth not appear and act to such a purpose as this for the present , yet if you do not amend , and sue out your Pardon , he will question you about it at the last , and punish you for it too . Fourthly ; When you come so late to your Houses , do you in your Consciences think that you come soon enough to your duty ? Is so late at Night the best time you can pick out to bestow upon God ? It is more than probable that then you your selves are not in any fit condition to make your appearance before so glorious a Majesty , who is of purer eyes than to behold iniquity , and very sensible of his Creatures neglecting him , and who will not be mock'd , no , nor slighted neither . Surely you are not then in a fit case to present your Petition to him , in whose Hand your Souls and Lives , and All are ; you are not then in a fit case to strive in Prayer , and wrestle with Omnipotency ; though indeed the Door of Grace doth stand always open , yet your Souls are not always active , and at that time your Bodies will be a clog and hindrance to them . At that Hour , not only your Hearts , it may be , are down , and flat , and dead , and your Spirits run very low , but your very Heads are discomposed too , and out of order ; and it is not likely that Grace should be lively and vigorous in its motions , when Nature it self is jaded , tir'd , and calls for relief . But how do you think it is with the rest of the Family , who have stood in your Shops till their Legs have ak'd , and been spent and wearied with the toyl and labour of the day , doing your work , and running from one end of the Town to another upon your Errands , and after all have been impatiently waiting , and wishing , and looking for you till they could look no longer , not being able to hold up their Eyes ; for though the Spirit be never so willing , yet the Flesh is weak . Now I appeal to you , is this a good Praying-time ? And are not all in a right praying case when in such a case as this ? And the work is like to be done as it should be when they that set about it scarce know what they do , possibly they are all asleep as soon as ever they are fallen down upon their Knees , or if not so soon , before the Master hath done , and the Prayer is ended ? O Great God how art thou served by these pitiful Wretches that owe thee more than they are worth ! How would they put thee off ! Wert thou not what thou art , God , and not Man , and were not thy Goodness , thy Patience like thy Self Infinite ? Thou wouldst not , nay more , thou couldst not bear it ; and I leave you to think , whether you have reason to hope that he will accept . In short , by this means at sometimes the duty is totally omitted , and then they are sent to Bed as Swine to their Sties ; at other times it is slightly and shamefully perform'd , and so there is short-praying , and sleepy praying , and dead , heartless praying , and indeed no praying ; for we have reason to be confident that God will not call that praying , but a trifling and fooling , not a seeking , but a mocking of him . If this be your Incense that you offer to him it must needs stink in his Nostrils , and it is no wonder that he counts and calls it an abomination ; this is no other than offering unto him the Blind and the Lame for a Sacrifice , and he may speak to you in the very same words that he us'd to those wicked Persons , Mal. 1.8 . If ye offer the blind for sacrifice , is it not evil ? and if ye offer the lame and sick , is it not evil ? Is it not evil ? Yes it is ; if it be not evil in your Eyes , it is in mine , and evil in it self , and would be counted so by a Man thy Superiour , therefore he thus goes on , Offer it now unto thy Governour , will he be pleased with thee , or accept thy Person , saith the Lord of Hosts ? You see what pains I have taken about this one thing ; shall I entreat and prevail with you to consider and lay to heart what hath been said , and if there be reason , of which I do not doubt , be rul'd by it . And if any that have heard me this day be guilty herein , let them humble themselves before God , and implore his Pardon , and let them be sure to reform this great abuse . Go home , and sin no more , do so no more , the time past may suffice . VI. I do advise that you would neither in your Closets , nor in your Families confine and tye up your selves to a form of Prayer . I would do every thing that I do for good , would both speak and write to the advantage and edification of others , and not willingly anger the Wasp , much less offend any of Christ's little ones ; therefore that I may , as far as in me lies , have peace with all Men , and above , and within too ; I say , First ; I do not wholly condemn a form of Prayer . I do not deny the lawfulness of it ; nor would I for a World charge any Man with sin for making use of one , so that he do but pray with his Heart also . It is far better to pray with a form than not to pray at all , better to go to God with a good Prayer composed by another , than with his own nonsense . And I also add ▪ That a form of Prayer is not only lawful but necessary too for some , namely , those that know not how to pray without one ; Those who ( as Learned Mr. Tho. Fuller saith ) have not yet attained , what all should endeavour , to pray ex tempore by the Spirit , for them a form of Prayer is as necessary as a Crutch is for a lame Man. And I do not doubt but such an one may have sweet Communion with God , and find welcome and a gracious Entertainment , so that he be upright in his Heart , and fervent in his Spirit while serving of the Lord , or to use the expression of the same worthy Person , Though a Man hath not change of Raiment , and cannot appear at the Court of Heaven every day in a new Suit , but comes in the same Cloaths , yet if he be a Loyal Subject , he shall have free access to the King of Glory ; if he be a Child Heaven-born , his Fathers Ear will be open to him , and his Petition receiv'd and granted ; but while he goes to God with his old Prayer , let him labour to carry with him new affections . But , Secondly ; I must needs profess , to the Imposition of a form of a Prayer I am no Friend . I have been pleas'd with the Composure of several , for the spiritualness and variety of the Matter , and for the aptness of the Expression , but do not like the imposing of them ; neither some Mens taking upon them to impose them on others , nor that any Man should impose one upon himself ; and I am sure it is not from a Spirit of Errour , or of Division , or of Contradiction , that I believe and assert it far more excellent and desireable both for Ministers and private Christians to be able from an inward sense of , and acquaintedness with their own case , wants , and necesties , and from the abundance of their Hearts , together with the gracious assistance of the Blessed Spirit of God to pour out their desires into his Bosom , and make their Requests known to him , than to borrow , and make use of , and tye themselves to the best form of anothers composing . And I am perswaded our dear Lord Jesus did draw up , and give out to his Disciples that most sweet , full , and comprehensive Prayer as a pattern for them to imitate , not as a form , with which they should sit down contented , without looking after , or making use of those Gifts and Abilities which he either had or should by his Spirit bestow and confer upon them . And as for those who do ridicule and laugh at praying by the Spirit , making it the matter of their scorn and derision , I do not stick to charge them with a Spirit of Profaneness , only I beg that God would shew them their sin , and give them Repentance , and a Pardon . These things being thus premised , I do , as before , Counsel you who are my Hearers , not to tye your selves up to a form of Prayer , and I shall give you three or four Reasons of my advising you so . First ; Because it is my hearty desire that all of you who make Prayer your work and business , should keep your selves at the greatest distance possible from a lifeless cold formality . Do all that you can to avoid it ; not that I think formality is inseparable from form , or that it cannot find room in him who prayeth extemporarily ; we all have need to watch both unto Prayer and in it , else we shall have our Hearts to seek while we are seeking of God. But I look upon it as a thing past question among experienced Christians that conceived Prayer , ( as it is commonly called ) being rightly managed , hath a greater and more direct tendency to the affecting both the Soul of him that utters it , and the Souls of those that join with him , and towards the raising of them up to a due warmth of Affection , and preserving them in it . I shall recite to you the words of a late Reverend , Holy Divine , of mine intimate Acquaintance , that did Conform to the Church of England , viz. Mr. Gurnal , Famous for that excellent Piece of his , The Christian in compleat Armour , a Book worth Gold. After he had there pleaded for the lawfulness of Forms of Prayer , yea , and that in the Church , he hath these Expressions , The evil is not in a Form , but in Formality , and that is a Disease which may be found in him that prayeth with a conceived Prayer . A Man may pray without a Form , and yet not pray without Formality ; and this I grant , but now observe that which follows ; I confess , he that binds himself constantly to a set Form , especially in his private addresses , seems to me to be more in danger of the two , of falling under the power of that lazy Distemper . Secondly ; There are some things which may , and often do fall out , which none can so well speak to , as the Master of the Family himself can do , supposing him furnished with such a competent measure of Abilities as doth become one in his place . There are indeed common ordinary cases both of Persons , and Families , and Nations , which some forms may reach , and do very well suit ; but there are and may be some particular cases , which the Governour of a Family , who , as he ought , studieth both himself and it , is best able to express and spread before God , Prov. 14.10 . The heart knoweth his own bitterness , and a stranger intermeddles not with his joy . And surely then he is the fittest Person to relate both the one and the other . Supposing a sick Patient have the full use of his Reason , the Physician doth expect from himself the best account of his state . Thirdly ; Conceived Prayer is the most direct way to Spiritual Increases . It is the duty of Christians not to sit down with present attainments , but while they are on this side of Heaven and Glory , to be continually aspiring and reaching after more ; more Grace in order to a greater fitness for the happiness hereafter , and more Gifts in order to a greater serviceableness here . Now what progress is he like to make who continually walketh in a round . If a Child will always walk holding on a Bench , he is not like to be a good Footman . The old saying is , Vse Legs , and have Legs ; it holds true here , use Parts and have them , yea , and more too . To him that hath , and imployeth what he hath , shall be given . I do not doubt but conceived Prayer is better than the constant use of a form for the inriching of a Person with praying-gifts , if I may not say , with Grace too . Let serious and truly honest Christians both of one way and the other speak as they find . I know nothing fitter to determine that than their Experience . Fourthly ; The confining of your selves to a form of Prayer is a dishonour unto God , whose Glory ye should be dear over , and promote to your utmost . Your Gifts are bestow'd upon you in order to his Honour , but what Honour hath he from them when conceal'd ? This is ingratitude to God , where are the returns you make to him for the benefits you have from him . To have the Gift of Prayer , and not to use it , is no other than to bury the Talent in a Napkin ; and so to do is not the part of a faithful Servant , nor the way to enter into the Joy of your Lord , when you leave Earth . Fifthly ; It is a dishonour to your selves ; as it would be for a Man to walk with a Crutch when he can go as well , and better without it ; it is a making your selves poor when God hath enriched you , and living upon the Basket , when you have a sufficient Stock of your own . Sixthly ; When you have Gifts for Prayer , and yet c●nfine your selves to a form , you are injurious to others . Every manifestation of the Spirit is given to profit with all , 1 Cor. 12.7 . Every Gift , by which the presence of the Spirit , the in-being and influence of the Spirit doth appear , is bestowed upon Men not meerly for Ornament , but for Use , not for Ostentation , but in order to greater Serviceableness , that they might profit with it , profit others , their Friends , their Families , the Church of God. But now those that have the Gift of Prayer , and use it not , do not profit with it ; they do no good to others . It is like Money kept up in a Chest that the Miser is not the better for ; or a Candle in a dark Lanthorn that gives no light , and they are not like to profit in it : Not to make any improvement or increase , it is a dead Commodity ; thy not using it is losing it ; it is the way to have it taken from thee , to have God blow upon it with a withering Breath . And indeed why should a Man have that which he will do nothing with . You know the Parable , the unprofitable Servant buried his Talent , and his Lord commanded he should have it no longer , but be severely punished for his neglect . For all these Reasons , Christians , I do advise you not to tye your selves up to a form of Prayer ; use your own Gifts , but see there be Grace too ; content not your selves with a volubility of Tongue , a freedom and neatness of Expre●sion , but see that the words of your Mouths be the Meditations of your Hearts , and accompanied with the Affections too , that is the way to have them acceptable in the sight of God. VII . In all your solemn approaches to God , consider with what an infinitely glorious Majesty you have to do , and set your selves to the work as in his sight . Consider his being of purer Eyes than that he can behold iniquities without loathing and abhorrency ; consider that he cannot be deceived , and will not be mocked ; and that he is most jealous in those things that appertain to his worship , Lev. 10.3 . This is it that the Lord hath spoken , I will be sanctified of all them that come nigh me . Again , consider that God is observant of you at all times , but most curiously so when drawing near him in Duty . He hath said , Where two or three are met together in his name , there he will be in the midst of them , Mat. 18.20 . As to hear their suits , so to observe their behaviour . The Iudges place is usually in the midst that he may the better see and hear ; so God is in the midst of Congregations and Houses to take notice how his work is done , and whether his Servants carry toward him 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 as becomes a God. Do you remember therefore the Exhortation given , Heb. 28.29 . Let us have grace whereby we may serve God acceptably with reverence and godly fear , for our God is a consuming fire . Where we may observe , First ; What our God is , viz. A consuming fire . Not a stock or piece of Wood like the Heathen Idols , but a Living , Mighty and Active Being , who can , like Fire , quickly and severely punish those that do provoke him . Nadab and Abihu experienced this upon their Offering with strange Fire . The Apostle saith , Our God is so ; the God of the Christians is a consuming Fire , as well as the God of the Jews . He is indeed the Father of Mercies , and God of all Comforts , but with all , Vengeance bel●ngs to him , and he will repay it . Secondly ; What our great interest is , to serve God acceptably . While here we cannot serve God to perfection , but we must serve him to acceptance ; what is not done to acceptance is done to no purpose , and will turn to no account ; where there is no acceptance of the Duty , there can be no rational expectation of a comfortable Reward . Thirdly ; What is necessary in order thereunto , Grace . Those Duties that come from Grace will meet with Grace ; without that the Calves of the Lips will be as odious as Swines-flesh , or the cutting off a Dogs-head . If the Person be bad the work cannot be good ; though the Sacrifice of the wicked may be rich and costly , yet because it is his , it proves an abomination to the Lord. Fourthly ; How this Grace must discover and shew it self , viz. in reverence and godly fear . See that the awe of God fall upon you , and fill you , that your fear of him be not slavish but filial , that you fear him and his Goodness , fear to offend as well , and as much as to suffer . Thus David resolved to appear before him , Psal. 5.7 . I will come into thine house in the multitude of thy mercies . Incouraged by the many Mercies that have been extended to me , and relying upon that Infinite Mercy that is still in thee ; and in thy fear will I worship toward thy holy temple . And let this inward godly fear manifest it self by the reverence you express while in his presence and service , both at your entrance and all along , from the beginning to the end . Before him Seraphims the glorious Angels cover their Faces with two of their Wings ; and if this become those excellent Creatures , Heavens Courtiers , then Dust and Ashes much more . God indeed allows his People a boldness , but it must be an humble one ; and herein be you Examples to all in your Families . It indeed is not within the reach of your power to work Grace in the Hearts of your Yoke-fellows , Children or Servants ; nor to stir up in them a true filial fear of God , that cannot be effected by any power less than an Omnipotent one , by any Arm shorter than the Divine one ; yet see to it that there be a due reverence exprest by them all in their outward Gestures and Deportments ; strictly charge and command them to avoid lolling , sleeping , talking , laughing , gazing about , and every thing else that speaks a vain light Mind . I add one thing more ; VIII . Be sure to put up all your Prayers to God in the Name of Iesus Christ. He hath left his Spirit , and his Name with us , therefore let us make use of both , seeking for assistance from his gracious Spirit , and for success from his prevailing Name . Unto this we have been directed by our Lord himself , Iohn 16.26 . At that day ye shall ask in my name . While he was Corporally present with them , they made their applicaaion to him , and asked of him , and he did supply all their needs , and granted to them those things which they desired and were convenient , but after my Resurrection and Ascension , when I am absent from you , and received up to Glory , Ye shall go to my Father , and that in my Name . I give you free liberty to set my Name to all your holy Petitions , and desire him to fulfil them for my sake . And to the doing hereof he doth encourage us by a gracious promise of success ; both that he himself will fulfil such desires , such Prayers . For this he gives them his word , and we may be sure he will be as good as his word , Iohn 14.13 , 14. Whatsoever ye shall ask in my name , that will I do , that the Father may be glorified in the Son , or by the Son whom he hath raised with his own right Hand , and constituted the sole Mediator ; and for our greater assurance and comfort he repeated it in the next Verse , If ye shall ask any thing in my Name , I will do it ; not only take care that it shall be done , but I my self will do it ; which is a strong Argument , and clear Evidence of Christ's being God , since he doth the work of God in hearing and answering of Prayer . And he likewise tells us in Iohn 16.23 . Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my Name , he will give it you ; only you must necessarily suppose that what you so ask must be according to his Will , and for our Good , 1 Iohn 5.14 . This is the confidence which we have of him , that if we ask any thing according to his will , he heareth us ; we shall be sure to obtain it , to have the Petitions we desire of him . There is a certainty of speeding when we pray aright in the Name of Christ , and with Faith in that Name ; that which so goeth up in a Cloud of Prayer , shall descend in a Shower of Mercy ; there is nothing shall hinder it , none on Earth , none in Hell can , and none in Heaven will , for the Father and Christ are one , one in Nature , and one in Will ; both are perfectly agreed as in other things , so in this of fulfilling such Prayers ; you shall have your desire , Christ will do it , and so will the Father , both will consent , both concur and co-operate . This is , as a late worthy Divine hath observed , part of that Glory which God hath put upon Christ , all must be done in his Name . Prayer , ask in my Name . Church-meetings , when two or three are met together in my Name ; Church-censures , 1 Cor. 5 4 , 5. In the Name of our Lord Iesus Christ , when ye are gathered together ▪ and my Spirit , with the power of our Lord Iesus Christ ▪ to deliver such an one unto Satan . Ministers are to Preach in his Name , and to Baptize in his Name ; therefore whensoever you pray to the Father , be sure that you do it believingly in the Name of Christ , both in publick and in private , both when you are by your selves alone , and when with your Families ; and that , First ; For your own sakes ; that when you knock , it may be opened to you , and you may have what you ask , and find what you seek ; that instead of being with anger rejected , your Prayers may be graciously received , and be sanctified by the Golden Altar , and being accompanied with the Incense of our Blessed Advocate , may come up as so many Odours , and find the desired acceptance , and do it . Secondly ; For your Families sake ; that by this means they may be put upon Enquiries after this precious Lord Iesus , for this will be to them an occasion of asking you and others concerning him , who , and what he is ? And so they may come to some knowledge of him , whom to know is Life Eternal , as the way to it , and the beginning of it ; they may know him as the one and only Mediator between God and Man , as the great Master of Requests that is at the Fathers Right Hand ready to receive all the Petitions of his poor but dear People , and as ready to expunge the faults and supply the defects of them , and so to present them to the Father , and to back them with his own Intercession which is powerful and prevailing , the Father heareth him always ; and this being accompanied with the Spirit and Blessing of God may prosper to the working in them some love and good liking of him , and by consequence kindle in them some desires after an Interest in him , as in one that is great and good , as in one that they stand in absolute need of , without whom they cannot be saved , nor find favour with God , but must everlastingly perish and be undone ; since there is nothing that can commend them to God but Jesus Christ ; no Wings that can secure them but those of this Sun of Righteousness ; nothing that can wash out their stains and filth but his Blood , nothing that can cover their nakedness and shame but his Robe ; nothing that can make their Beauty perfect but his Comeliness put upon them . In short , in this way , and with your help they may come to understand , that it is not their good meanings , nor their good doings , not their civility and honest dealings with Men , not their keeping clear of bad actions , the gross pollutions that are in the World through Lust , no , nor their running in a round of duty that will justifie them ; but only the compleat , perfect Obedience of Christ , and his precious Blood , as of a Lamb without spot ; and that it is not their Prayers , though long and fervent , that will prevail with God , but only the Mediation and Intercession of Christ. And to this end I would give you this advice further , content not your selves with a bare naming Christ in your Prayers , but make an honourable mention of him , after such a manner as this ; Our dear Lord Jesus , Jesus who is the Lord our Righteousness , who loved us , and washed us in his own Blood , and made us Kings and Priests unto God ; Jesus who dyed for our Offences , and rose again for our Justification . By frequent repetitions of such things in your Prayers , and suitable Discourses at other times , the Lord Jesus may become acceptable and precious to them , through whom , and for whose sake both you and they must become acceptable to God , if ever ye be so . Having spoken so largely to this Subject , my earnest Request is , that you all would set up , and keep up this necessary and excellent duty of Morning and Evening-prayer every day in your respective Families , carefully observing and putting in practice those Rules which have been laid down for the better performance of it ; and my hearty Prayer for you who do so is , that you may have help from Heaven in the work , and afterward receive such gracious answers , and plentiful returns , as may raise and fix in you a resolution of calling upon God as long as you live . There is but one Objection against this holy practice , which I judge worthy to be taken notice of , and I will do what I can to silence the Objection , and to do him good that humbly makes it . Object . Some poor Creature may put in and say , Sir , you have with much Importunity and Zeal stirred us up to the performance of Family-duties , and in particular that of Prayer , and I have with diligence attended to what hath been spoken , and cannot but acknowledge there is much strength in those Arguments which have been us'd and urg'd for the pressing it upon us ; so that I am convinced of the goodness of the thing , and own it to be my Duty , and would be glad to do it if I could , but I am not in a capacity , my ignorance is exceeding great , and my parts full out as little ; I have no such Gifts as other Men have , and so tremble to think of undertaking so great and weighty a thing as this ; should I make an attempt , for certain I should most shamefully miscarry , and render my self ridiculous ; it is to be fear'd , that this is really the case of too too many in this City , yea , and possibly of some in this Congregation . Answ. To such an one I will answer in these following Particulars . I. Thou who makest this Objection art a very great Object of Pity , and I do heartily pity thee . What! O Man , canst thou converse in the World , and discourse with thine Acquaintance , manage thine Affairs , and carry on thy Trade , and yet not Pray ? Canst thou deal with thy Customers , and not with thy God ? Thou hast scarce thy Fellow in any sort of Wretches ; there is not a poor Creature in Town or Countrey that wanteth Bread , and hath a craving Stomach , but he can beg , though he doth not know one Letter in the Book , yet he can ask for an Alms ; nor is there a Malefactor in danger of his Life , but will find something to say for himself ; though he cannot make out his Innocency , nor clear himself of the Crime laid to his Charge , though he hath nothing to say why the Sentence of Death should not be past upon him , yet he can fall down upon his Knees and say , Mercy , my Lord , Mercy ; and canst thou not do as much when thy Case is as bad , and worse ? Thy Soul , Man , is ready to starve , and so are the Souls of thy Family , all in extream necessity , and canst thou not beg ? Thou art worthy of death , and so are they , Sentence hath been already past , and hast thou not any thing to say for the staying of the Execution ? Thou and thy Family have a great number of great wants , and canst thou not ask a supply when it may be had for asking ? Thou art a poor , sorry , pitiful Creature indeed , if there be one in the World. It is a thousand pities thou shouldest have a Family , a Wife and Children , who canst neither provide necessaries for their Souls , nor beg for them . Thou hast indeed but little , very little love and kindness for thy self , and Family , in thy heart , and as little brains in thy head , who canst not go to God , and speak a few good words for them . II. Since thou dost not to this day know how to Pray , I advise thee to learn to do it , and that speedily , for it is high time ; when thou wast young and little thou didst not know great A. but now thou canst read distinctly , roundly , yea , and write a legible hand , how came that about ? thou didst learn it . So when thou wast first bound an Apprentice to thy Master , thou couldest do nothing at thy Trade , no , not a stroak , thou wast a very Ignoramus , thou couldest not tell the Price of those Commodities which thou wast to deal in , much less judge of their goodness ; nay , thou couldest not so much as tell their Names , but now thou art expert and skilful , and there are very few Persons that can out do thee in thy business , and how came this about ? thou didst learn it . In the present Case , go thou and do the like : thou sayst thou canst not Pray , I say , go thou and learn to Pray ; be thou who thou wilt , for thy Worldly Quality I am sure thou art not too good for it , and I hope thou art not too old ; beg therefore of God , that he would teach thee ; the Disciples desired this very thing of Christ , Luke 11.1 . Lord , teach us to Pray , as Iohn also taught his Disciples , and without more ado he did it , go you and do likewise ; fall upon your knees , and say , Lord , I am a poor ignorant Creature , I do not know how to Pray , O! do thou teach me . And for your comfort and encouragement know , First , It is the work of the Spirit to assist poor Souls in Prayer , it is one of the works of his Office , Rom. 8.26 . Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our Infirmities , for we know not what to Pray for as we ought ; that is as much as thou canst say of thy self ; neither know how to Pray , to Pray as we should , nor what to Pray for , but the Spirit it self maketh intercession for us , with groanings which cannot be uttered . Secondly , God hath graciously promised this Spirit to his Church , and Children , and that under the very notion of a Spirit of Prayer , Zech. 12.10 . I will pour out upon the house of David and upon the Inhabitants of Ierusalem a Spirit of Grace and Supplication . He will give much of it , he will pour it out . Thirdly , God is most ready to make good his Promises , this in particular . He is both faithful , and free , Luke 11.13 . If ye , being evil , know how to give good gifts unto your Children , how much more shall your Heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him ? Go therefore , and beg of God , that he would give this Spirit to thee . III. Do thy endeavour , making use of those means by which an ability to Pray , I mean the gift of Prayer may be in some measure attained , for we are not to please our selves with expecting much , and doing nothing , idle hopes are vain ; if you ask me what means you should make use of , I briefly answer . First , Carefully observe others , Godly Ministers , and Christians , when thou hearest them Pray , mind how they pour out their requests unto God , and get something out of their Prayers which is proper for thee ; as when Persons are in a Garden where they see variety of curious and pleasant Flowers , they will pick one here , and another there , for themselves ; do the like with those apt and pertinent expressions which thou hearest from others , make them thine own , only in using them , let tongue and heart go together . Secondly , Be very conversant in the holy Scriptures , and there take notice of precepts and promises , and turn them into Prayer , begging that God would give what he commands , and perform what he promiseth ; in particular acquaint thy self well with David's Psalms , in which you will find abundance of excellent matter both for confession and petition , for prayer , and praise . Thirdly , Be much in studying your own and your Families State , and consider how matters stand with you , seriously think what sins there are , and what afflictions , what wants , and what dangers , and thereupon go to God , and beg of him the pardon of those sins , and power against them , beg the sanctifying of those afflictions , that they may be wholsom , though bitter , and out of the eater there may come Meat ; make a thankful acknowledgment of the Mercies you receive , and give unto God the glory of them ; Petition for the gracious supply of those wants , and prevention of those dangers , from all these things you may gather together a great deal of fit matter for Prayer , only still beg of God that he would by his Spirit assist , influence and enable you to make a right use of it . IV. I dare assure thee , that if thou wilt sincerely and in good earnest set thy self about the work , God will not be wanting to thee ; do thou in obedience go out to thy duty , and he will graciously come in to thy assistance ; our endeavours indeed and utmost activity lay no obligation upon him , but his own grace and goodness do induce and move him . David said , Psalm 138.3 . In the day when I cried thou answer'dst me , and strengthenedst me with strength in my Soul. Do thou , O poor Soul , take encouragement from thence , direct thy Prayer to God , and look up in the day that thou criest unto God , he may answer thee too , and afford thee that which at present thou labourest and groanest under the want of , and as he strengthned David with strength in his Soul , so he may bestow upon thee a competency of gifts , and the assistance of his Holy Spirit . God doth now by me call you out to the performance of this Duty , Family Prayer , but you complain of an unfitness for it , and not without cause ; well , remember God did once immediately call Moses out to a great work , publick work , to go and speak to Pharaoh , and in the name of God to command him to let Israel go ; he was very unwilling to comply , but as thou complainest of inability , so did he , thou thinkest thy self unfit to be the Families mouth to God , Moses thought himself unfit to be Gods mouth to Pharaoh , Exod. 4.10 . O my Lord , I am not Eloquent , neither heretofore , nor since thou hast spoken to thy Servant , but I am slow of Speech , and of a slow Tongue , far from being fit to be sent upon God's Errand to so Great and Proud a Prince ; but mark what God answered him , ver . 11. Who hath made Mans mouth ? or who hath made the dumb or deaf , or seeing , or the blind ? have not I the Lord ? therefore go , and I will be with thy mouth , and teach thee what thou shalt say . I that made the mouth can mend it , I made the Instrument , and can tune it , I can supply the defects , and cure the infirmities of it ; if it be a flow tongue I can quicken it , I can put to it eloquence , and nimbleness . Bring this now to the case in hand , it is thy duty to pray in and with thy Family , thou art now loudly call'd to it , the great God calls thee to it by me , and I do not in the least question , but if thou hast any sense of a Deity , thine own Conscience hath called thee to it many and many a time before now , and I pray thee to bethink thy self , did no body else , did thy Wife never desire it of thee ? did thy Child never beg it of thee ? did none of thy Friends who lov'd thee , put thee upon it ? and hast thou not done it yet ? how inexorable art thou , how hard thy heart ? What! so loath to come to thy duty ? yea , to that which is thy priviledge as well as thy duty , this is quite contrary to the Wisdom which is from above , which is easie to be intreated ; take shame to thy self , and mend now , go home , and in good earnest fall to the work , and I dare say God will be with thy heart , yea and with thy mouth too . V. Practice will be accompanied with improvement , use doth greatly facilitate things . How aukwardly doth a Child move the feet when it first begins to goe ? who can observe it without a smile , but yet in a little time it hath got the knack of it , and can move them regularly , nimbly , and with strength , and knows how to walk and run as well as others . There are indeed difficulties in Duty , but to the sincere Soul the difficulties wear off , and the duty will grow easier and easier , the way of the Lord being strength to the upright , so that therein they go from strength , to strength . After that upon the Commandment of God , Moses had once gone in to Pharaoh , and spoken , we do not read of his complaining any more , no , not though God told him that he would harden Pharaoh's heart , yet as often as God ordered him ▪ he went , not desisting , till Pharaoh commanded him to see his face no more . Therefore begin , Man begin , and see what will come of it ; fall to work , you will find that your labour is not in vain . The Scripture saith , ye shall know , if ye follow on to know the Lord ; and I may say , ye shall pray better and better , if ye will but follow on to pray , by means hereof you will attain to a greater knowledge of God , and more intimate acquaintance with him , and your own hearts , and you will find inward increases and growth in grace , and a changing of you into his Image , from glory , to glory , and that will help toward the production of a more holy boldness toward God , and a greater Parrhesia , liberty or freedom of Speech , and your hearts will be more inlarged ; as Sin grows by acting it , so doth grace , yea , and gifts too . Trading tends to thriving , to him that hath , shall be given , i. e. to him that useth what he hath as he should ; the consciencious performance of duty is the way to bring down from God a blessing upon your parts . I will add but one thing more . VI. Supposing thou shouldest never be able to do thy work so well as many of thy fellow Servants can , yet do not lay it aside , but do it as well as thou canst . The Apostle Paul speaks of diversities of gifts , and diversities of administrations , and diversities of operations , 1 Cor. 12. So there is a diversity of degrees , in Gods conferring those gifts upon Men ; good and faithful Servants are not made equal , as we read in the Lords intrusting them with Talents : one had five , another had but two , yet both faithful and industrious ; the wicked and sloathful Servant had only one , yet he should have traded with it , though he had but little to do , he ought to have been doing . So it is here , God is pleased to give large parts to some , so that they have a quick and fertile invention , and an answerable elocution , they can speak their minds freely , and cloath their conceptions with apt , yea , curious expressions , so as to charm the ears , and delight the hearts of those that joyn with them ; but thou art poor , and barren , ●at a great loss both for matter and words ; be humble upon this account , and little in thine own eyes , but not altogether discouraged , but fall to thy work , Man , Trade with thine one Talent . What though thou dost not Pray so as to raise the admiration , and gain the applause of them that hear thee ? is it not very well if thou canst so pray as to find acceptance with God ? what though it be jarring in their ears , so long as it is musick in his ? know thou hast to deal with a good Master , the God of all grace , who , if there be a willing Mind , doth accept according to what a Man hath , and not according to what he hath not . The poor Publican was very short , he had much to desire , yet little to say , his dejected looks and sorrowful gesture spake more than his Tongue did ; but though he was short , yet he was sweet , we read but of one Petition that he put up to God , God be merciful to me a Sinner , but he accompanied it with his heart , and it came before God as incense , who sent him home to his house justified , Luke 18.13.14 . God took away the filthy garments , he came in , and put on him a Robe of Righteousness . The Sacrifices of God are a broken Spirit , a broken and a contrite Heart , O God , thou wilt not despise , Psalm 51.17 . despise it ! no , no , he is so far from that , that he requires it , and approves it , and will bind it up . A broken Prayer from and with a broken Heart , makes Melody in Heaven . God will count it his delight . Alas ! he seeth not as Man sees , looks not at the flourishes of words , but at the life , fervency and Zeal of the Soul , for those flowers may be strewed upon a dead and rotten carcass . Indeed , if a Man bring the Torn , and the Sick , and the Lame for an Offering to the Lord , when he hath better , it shall not be accepted , Malach. 1.13 . but if that Torn , and Lame , and Sick , be the Male of the Flock , if it be the best he hath , God will receive it graciously , and have respect to the Person , and to his Offering , and Grace will say he hath done what he could , as our Lord pleaded for the Woman , when his Disciples did absurdly trouble her , Mark 14.8 . Not only those Richer Persons , who brought Gold , and Silver , and Silk , and Precious Stones to the service of the Tabernacle were welcome , but those also who came with their Goats-Hair , and Badgers-Skins , if they had no better . I am willing to hope , that by what hath been said , the mouth of this Objection is stopt , the edge of this Argument blunted , and so this untoward rub removed which lay in the way of thy Duty ; therefore I beg earnestly of thee that thou wouldest defer no longer , but get up , break thro' all opposition , and since God hath said , seek ye my face ; let thine heart answer , thy face , Lord , will I seek . Before I go off from this Subject , I shall direct my Discourse to two sorts of Persons . First , I would speak something to you whose hearts God hath touched , so that you love your work , and do it , making Family-Prayer your every day business . I bless you in the name of the Lord , and the God of Heaven bless you ; while I beg it for you , may he bestow it abundantly upon you , and pour it out till you be rich in blessings ; the good Lord strengthen your hands and hearts more and more in this work , and encourage you by his gracious answers ; may you find by frequent and large experience , that he hath not said to you , seek ye my face in vain . The Lord teach you to pray , and assist you by his Holy Spirit ? the Lord send you help from the Sanctuary , and strengthen you out of Sion ; remember all your Offerings , grant you according to your own hearts , and fulfill all your Petitions , which are according to his Mind , and Will ; may you by the Bucket of Prayer draw Water with joy out of the Well of Salvation ; let him never turn away your Prayer , nor his Mercy from you . Secondly , Do you also suffer the word of exhortation , who have your lines cast in those Families in which there is Prayer , and the Worship of God ; do you take special notice of it , as a choice mercy , and accordingly value it , and bless the Lord for disposing you so graciously , planting you not in a dry and barren Wild●erness where there is no Water , but in a Paradise , an Eden that is so well water'd . You that are Wives , and Married to Praying Husbands , do you bless God , and you Children who have been begotten by Praying Fathers , and you Servants who work for , and wait upon Praying Masters , let all that is within you bless his Holy Name , and see to it that you improve the Mercy , lose not such a Season , such an Opportunity . Oh! how much good may you get , how much the better may you be , in case you be not wanting to your selves ? and who can tell how much Mercy such an Husband , such a Father , such a Master , may obtain , how many Blessings he may procure at the hand of God for you ? read what the Queen of Sheba said to King Solomon , in the 1 of Kings , 10.8 . Happy are these thy Men , and happy are these thy Servants , which stand continually before thee , and that bear thy Wisdom . She had seen the House he had built , and the ascent by which he went up to the House of the Lord , and the Meat at his Table , and the sitting of his Servants , and the attendance of his Ministers , and their Apparel , but there was something above all this that she admired . She did not look upon the happiness of his Servants , as consisting in beholding the greatness of his State and Honour , and the Splendour and Glory of his Court , or in feeding every day upon his Royal Dainties , and Drinking his Generous Wines , but in hearing of his Wisdom . I may as well , yea , and much more say of you , in case you are your own Friends , happy , thrice happy are you , who live in such a Family ( though as the lowest and meanest Members of it ) in which you may every day hear the Master of it speaking to God , and conversing with Heaven , and every day perfuming the House with the precious Odours of his gracious and holy Prayers . So much may suffice to be spoken concerning that great and excellent Work of Family prayer , and Oh! that it may not be in vain as to any of you , if it be , you must answer for it another day . But that is not all , Christians , the whole of your work doth not lye in Prayer , this you must do , and not leave the rest undone , no , none of it undone● I remember the holy Apostle Paul speaking of Epaephras , whom he calls a Servant of Christ , and of them , a Citizen of Colos , a Member of their Church , and Teacher , much set for their good , saith , Col. 4.12 . He always labour'd fervently for them in Prayer , that they might stand perfect and compleat in all the will of God ; which is a great thing , and deserves our utmost endeavours , and his so labouring in Prayer for them to this end , spake him a good Man , and a singular Friend of theirs ; and it is my Hearts desire , and my frequent Prayer that it may be so with you . And this should be the Desire and Prayer , the Care and Endeavour of every one of you who are Godly Parents , and Religious Governours of Families , that both you your selves , and all those that are yours , may be perfect and compleat in all the Will of God ; that the Divine Will may be known by you , and likewise conform'd and liv'd up to , for , He that knoweth his Masters will , and doth it not , shall be beaten with many stripes ; when God takes his Rod in Hand , Luke 12.47 . Now , Family-instruction is one part of the Will of God concerning you who are Parents and Masters , yea , and Mistresses too . You are Priests in your own Houses , and as such ought not to be without your Sacrifices ; Prayer is your Duty . You are Prophets also there , and though it would be folly in you to turn Enthusiasts , and Predict Things to come , yet you ought not to be without your Teachings ▪ and wholesom Counsels ; and in one respect you will not . You that are Parents will , as soon as may be , teach your Children to speak and go , and when through Age and Discretion they are capable , you will bring them up to some Imployment and Trade or other , that they may afterwards arrive at some considerable Quality and Estate in the World , at least , that they may be able to earn their Bread , and get their Living without being chargeable to your selves or others ; and shall this be the utmost Extent of your Care ? Will you not teach them the fear of God , and Faith in our Lord Jesus Christ ? Will you not labour to bring them to a good understanding in the matters of Religion which are of highest importance , and shew them the way they should take in order to their coming unto Glory at the last ? If you are guilty of neglect herein what satisfactory Reason can you give of being so ? Here I cannot forbear telling you , that it hath often , and often been to me great matter of grief to see Persons grown up to Man's and Woman's Estate , yea , to grey Hairs , that could not read a Word , nor tell a Letter , whereupon I could not without just indignation reflect upon their unnatural Parents , who were so brutishly wanting to that love , kindness and pity which they ought to have had for them ; and now I make it my Request to you , yea , the poorest among you , that you would take greater and better care of your Children , see that they be taught to Read , and then that they Read the Bible ; do this though you pinch for it in other things , yea , though you spare it out of your own and their Bellies ; and if you cannot possibly do it out of your sorry pittance , beg the Charity of those you know , who may help in that without prejudice to themselves , a little matter will do , and this will turn to a greater account than relieving common Vagrants . And so for you that are Masters and Mistresses , and have Apprentices bound to you , I own it that they are bound to give you reverence , and to serve you with all diligence and faithfulness , and so let them in the fear of the Lord , but withal do you know and consider that you are obliged to take care of them , and teach them , what ? Your Trades ? And the Mysteries of them ? Yes without peradventure , your Indentures tell you so ; and if you do it not you deal falsly , but you are also to instruct them in the greatest and best Trade , that of Godliness , that with Heaven , in order to their being wise Merchants , and getting the Pearl of Price . That Family-instruction ought to be carefully attended to , I shall briefly prove . 1. By Scripture Precedents . 2. By Scripture Precept . First ; By Scripture Precedent , or Example . This hath been the practice of good Men recorded there , of a great Character , Eminent for their Faith and Holiness . You have in these Discourses already heard of that great confidence which God had in Abraham , who was called the Friend of God , and Father of the Faithful . God said , He knew him that he would command or order his Children , and his Houshold after him , that they should keep the way of the Lord. And we must conclude , Divine Wisdom , which is Infinite , is not , cannot be liable to a mistake , neither as to things nor Persons . Now we read in Gen. 14. that when his Kinsman or Nephew Lot was taken Captive and carried away . Abraham arm'd his trained Servants , and pursued them unto Dan ; your Bibles in the Margin have it , his instructed Servants , some render it his Catechized Servants , those , say some Learned Expositors , whom he had well taught and instructed not only in Domestick Business which concern'd the House , nor only in Military Affairs which related to War , but likewise and principally in Religion , and the Law of God. So again , Solomon the wisest of meer Men , at least in his time , was called Iedediah , the Beloved of the Lord , and that he was so appear'd by God's appointing him to succeed in the Throne as King of Israel , and chusing him to Build the Temple , both which were demonstrations of that particular kindness God had for him . And he was dearly beloved of his Father and Mother ; now the Love which they did bear him was evidenced by his gracious Education , and in their Parental Care for the right bringing of him up , Prov. 4.3 , 4. I was my Fathers Son , tender and only beloved in the sight of my Mother , he taught me also , and said unto me , let thy heart retain my Words , keep my Commandments , and live ; get wisdom , get understanding , &c. One saith , Doubtless his Father David being a King had Nathan the Prophet , and the best and most accomplished Persons the Kingdom could afford for the bringing up of his Son for whom he design'd the Crown , yet he did not leave it wholly to them , but would himself have an hand in the work , yea , a main one . Neither did his Mother think her self excused , but as she had brought him forth , so she would bring him up , as you may see in Prov. 31.1 . The words of King Lemuel the Prophecy which his Mother taught him . But passing from that , we will consider , Secondly ; Scripture Precept . And as I desire you to imitate and follow those good Examples , so to remember and conform to holy commands given out from God by his Servants , who wrote as they were moved by the Holy Ghost . I shall only mention that one which we have , Eph. 6.4 . Parents provoke not your Children unto wrath , but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. It is a Scripture that deserves to be written in Letters of Gold , and to be deeply imprest upon the Minds and Hearts of Parents . I cannot lightly pass over it ; two things are remarkable in it . First ; A Prohibition . Secondly ; An Injunction . First , Here is a Prohibition ; something forbidden , and carefully to be avoided ; Parents provoke not your Children unto wrath . It may be , this will sound harsh in the Ears of some , who have better thoughts of themselves than they do deserve , or any body else have ; they may be apt to conclude that Paul did forget himself here , and should rather have said , Children provoke not your Parents unto wrath To avoid that is their Duty and Interest ; but the Apostle knew what he did , when he said , Parents provoke not your Children unto wrath ; though you are above them , older and stronger than they , though they have their dependance upon you , though you at present give them their Maintenance , and must hereafter their Portion , yet provoke them not , do nothing to incense and inrage them . A Wasp is a very little feeble Creature , yet do not anger it , for it hath a Sting . Do not irritate your Children by too much severity ; remember the Authority you have over them is Parental , therefore your Government should be sweet and easie ; you should so carry as to be both fear'd and lov'd at the same time ; and in order to that not rule with a Rod of Iron , but draw and bind them to you with the Cords of a Man , those of Reason and Kindness ; more particularly , do not provoke your Children . First ; Not by unreasonable requiries , and hard commands ; lay not a Man's burden upon a Child's Shoulders ; exact not that which is above their ability to do . Secondly ; Do not make unequal distributions of your kindnesses among them , being all Honey to one , and all Gall to another ; remember they are equally yours ; though your Affections may incline more to one than another , yet conceal it as much as you can , unless their goodness and obedience make an apparent difference . Thirdly ; Provoke them not by giving them undue , unreasonable Correction ; the Rod is sometimes as necessary as Bread , but it must always be used with a prudent love ; let not your Rod be too smart , nor your Hand too heavy ; convince them that your chastening of them is not for your pleasure , but for their profit . Fourthly ; Provoke them not by calling them reproachful Names , as Fool , Blockhead , Rascal , or the like , which may expose them to the slight of others , to the contempt of your very Servants ; while you hate their offences be tender of their Reputation . Lastly ; Provoke them not by continual chiding , and threatning , finding fault with every thing they do ; overlook some smaller faults , and wink at others , knowing your selves are not blameless ; let not the Poyson of Asps dwell under your Tongues , nor all your words be as sharp Swords , but draw them to their duty , keep them at it , and encourage them in it , rather by love than fear . By provoking your Children unto wrath by all or any of these ways , you create to your selves more grief and sorrow than you at present are aware of ▪ for by rigour and severity the minds of your Children may be alienated and estranged from you : through your imprudent and unnatural Carriage , it may come to pass that instead of loving , reverencing and honouring you as Parents , they will only fear and dread you as Tyrants ; so that in after-times when you shall need them as Staffs in your Hands for support , they may prove Thorns in your sides piercing you thorough with many sorrows . Well , remember provoking your Children to wrath is forbidden , therefore carefully avoid it . Secondly ; In that Scripture there is an Injunction , or something commanded ; that is , the bringing of your Children up in the fear and nurture of the Lord. The Greek hath it , 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . The nurture and admonition of the Lord. The former word Translated Nurture doth signifie such Education or Discipline as is convenient or fit for young ones , made up of wise Instructions and needful Correction . The latter word by our Translators , rendred admonition , may be looked on as being of a double import , and signifying , 1. A putting something into the Mind . 2. A putting of the Mind into a right frame . First then ; It is the Duty , and should be the Endeavour of Parents to put something into the Minds of their Children , to stock them well , to instil and drop into them something that should be there , something that will be proper for them , and do them good ; that those choice and excellent Cabinets may be filled with Spiritual Riches , with goodly Pearls , yea , the Pearl of Price , in which by Nature ( as it is now corrupted ) there is nothing but filthy dross and dung . Now there is in them nothing but Vanity and Folly , false Notions , wrong Conceptions of things ; and it is pity such vain Thoughts should lodge there , a thousand pities they should continue and abide there ; labour to get them out by degrees , as soon and as fast as you can , that so instead of them , and in their room , you may happily introduce those things which are precious , and of value , viz. the Truths of God , Right , Orthodox and Saving Principles : get into these narrow-mouth'd Bottles drop by drop , as they are capable of receiving them , the true Notion of things ; for good Principles do directly tend to the producing of good Practices ; and a Divine Light set up in their Understandings may keep them in the way of Peace , and out of the path of the Destroyer , for by means thereof they will be put into a capacity of discerning the way in which they ought to go . Ignorance may be the Mother of a silly Devotion , that O Papists we will grant you , but , God having told us , His people are destroyed for lack of knowledge , we cannot but look upon it as the Highway to Perdition . Since without knowledge the Heart cannot be good , we will not stick at concluding , that without it the end cannot be peace . Secondly ; It is the duty , and should be the endeavour of Parents to put the Minds of their Children into a right frame , to cast them into a due Mould , and set them in a proper posture . It is now a dark Mind , there is blackness of darkness in it , your work is to illuminate it , and to set up there the Candle of the Lord. It is a corrupt Mind , the Scripture tells us , The Mind and Conscience is defiled , your work and duty is to cleanse it , and rid out all the filth that is there . Now that I may afford you all the help that I can in order thereto , I shall propound and offer some things to your Consideration and Practice , speaking first more generally , then more particularly ; in general , I advise these four things . First ; See carefully to it , that the Holy Scripture be read in your Families . The Bible is the Book of Books , may as well be so called as the Canticles is the Song of Songs . There is an inexhaustible Treasure for the inriching of the Mind , and a Golden exact Rule for the ordering of the Life . That is the most blessed and full Revelation of the Mind and Will of God concerning us ▪ whereby we may by Prayer and Study come to know what things we are to believe as God's Truths , and what to practice as our own Duties , what to reject as Errours , and what to avoid as Sins . There we have the great things of the Law for our Direction , and the precious things of the Gospel for our Consolation ; these are able to make us wise for Salvation , and thoroughly to furnish us for every good work which our heavenly Lord and Master hath cut out for us . This is part of the description of a blessed Man , that his delight is in the law of the Lord , and in that law he doth meditate day and night , Psal. 1.2 . And it is the Will of God not only that you your selves should know them , such Monopolizing is not grateful to the King of Glory , but also teach them your Children , Deut. 6.6 , 7. These words which I command thee this day , shall be in thy heart to know them , and to love them ; but to have them in their own Hearts was not all , it was not enough , no , no , read on , thou shalt teach them diligently to thy Children , and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house , and when thou walkest in the way , and when thou lyest down , and when thou risest up . The Word of God is to be the matter of our Meditation , and of our Discourses at all times , and in all places , I mean , in the Morning , and in the Evening , at home , and abroad . This alone is excellent Food , and to other discourse it is an excellent seasoning . Paul in his Epistle to Timothy speaks of his having known the Scriptures of a Child , ab incunabulis , almost from his Cradle ; he did , as it were , suck them in with his Mothers Milk , but how came that to pass ? By means of Parental Care , the Teachings and Instructings of his Parents , for certain , of his Mother in that young and tender Age. Secondly ; Look diligently to the Catechising of them . Blessed be God that Exercise hath been for some Years kept up in our Congregation , and is now singularly well performed by my worthy Brother , Mr. Alexander , whom you have chosen and called to that and other Ministerial Work among you ; the Lord grant his Blessing both to him and to it , that there may be much good fruit thereof seen and felt both in young and old ; and by the way I cannot pass it by in silence , that it is some trouble to me there are no more of your Children and Servants brought into it ; and I cannot but reckon it a bad sign of proud or slothful unwillingness in them , or else of a wretched neglect or carelesness in some of you . But I advise and earnestly desire you as to be thankful for , so not to rest in what is done here , but come out to our help , and do your duty at home , teach you your Children and Servants their Catechism , and examine them in it your selves . In the Assembly's Catechism ( which is us'd in our Congregation , and which I commend to your Family use ) you have a Body of Divinity summarily contained , the main Fundamental Principles of Religion , necessary to be known in order to Salvation , methodically propounded , and also brought into so narrow a compass , that they will not oppress and burden the memory , but if blessed of God , mend both head and heart . To the want of this we may , I doubt not , in part impute it , that there among us so many wicked and profane persons , so many Sons and Daughters of Belial , so many ungodly , impudent and debauched Young ones ; Hos. 4.1 . There is no knowledge of God in the Land ; to be sure then there is a great deal of villany ; yes ; verse 2. By swearing , and lying ▪ and killing , and stealing , and committing Adultery they break out , and Blood toucheth Blood. Darkness being in the Mind , the Works of Darkness will be in the Life : an uninstructed Head , an unsanctified Heart , and a wicked Life go together ; through this means so many precious Souls go down to Hell , and are for ever lost , they perish for lack of knowledge ; for lack of this the Labours of Ministers are no more successful . Want of Family-Instruction is one great reason of so much unprofitable Hearing . 3dly . Take all possible care , that none under your Charge prophane the Lord's-day : That is a day which God hath sanctified , by chusing it out of the rest of the days , and setting it apart for holy use ; and it is his will that all his People should sanctifie it too ; as he hath made it holy , they must keep it so : We are to call it a delight , the holy of the Lord , honourable , and honour it , or , him ; i. e. Honour God by honouring the Sabbath , not doing our own ways upon it , nor finding our own pleasure , nor speaking our own words . There are ways , and pleasures , and words proper for that day , but they must not be our own , no , nothing of our own , it must be the way of God , and the pleasure of God , and the word of God that we are for upon that day , and not our own ; Isa , 58.13 . Neither our corrupt sinful thoughts , the froth or scum of our depraved Nature , nor our worldly profits , nor our sensual pleasures ; we must bring our thoughts , our minds and hearts , and strength with us , but lay them at the foot of God , devote them to his service , and engage them entirely about his work . Upon that day we are not of a due elevation till above our selves , and above the World ; nothing of our own is to be minded or done by us save works of Necessity and Mercy : It is God's day , and therefore to be employed about the things of God , thoughts of God , discourses of God , the Service and Worship of God should take up the whole of that holy day : To do worldly business , to follow bodily recreations upon that day , is no less than Sacriledge , a robbing of God. Therefore take care of your Families as to this ; do not you set your Children or Servants about the affairs of your Callings on that day ; see also that they mis-spend it not themselves , but in the performing acts of duty , preparing to wait upon God in the way of his Publick Ordinances , and thither do you carry them with you , not suffering them to stay lazying , sleeping , or playing at home , or to go rambling abroad whither they themselves please ; no , no , in this case put on the Spirit of Elijah , and be very jealous for the Lord God of Hosts ; see that That day be kept for God , and when you and your Families are at home , exercise your selves and them unto Godliness . The continuance of Religion in England doth under God very much depend upon a care of keeping the Sabbath . Many years ago when I was a young Man , Famous Mr. Newcomen of Dedham told me this passage : This Question was put in the Conclave , What is the best way to reduce England to the see of Rome ? To this every Cardinal was to give his Answer , beginning at the youngest . Many Expedients were propounded , at length an old Fox stood up , and said , Take away their Sabbaths , and that will effectually do it : This Invention was hugg'd , this Medium resolv'd upon , and not long after came out the Book of Sports . O holy Mother Church ! whose Interest is promoted by such unholy means . And let me tell you , I do never expect to see Religion flourishing , nay not living long in that Family , in which there is not due regard had to the Lord's-day . Therefore as in all other things , so particularly in this , I do advise and earnestly beseech you to be as tender and careful of the Interest of the great God as you are of your own , and more too . Fourthly ; When you have been waiting upon God in the ways of his Publick Worship , and have had the Counsels of his holy Will made known to you , and the great Mysteries of Religion opened , at your return to your own houses , do you retire your selves and be alone with God , lest by being in company with others , and falling into discourses of another nature , you lose the things you had heard , and those impressions wear out that were made upon you ; and also allow convenient time to all in your Families for their Private Devotions , remembring they have precious immortal Souls , the Salvation of which they are as much concern'd to work out as your selves are of your own . I have somewhere read of a King ( I wish there were more like him ) who , while he was teaching a poor Boy that belonged to his Kitchen , being askt the reason why he did so , answered , The poorest hath a Soul as precious as mine , and cost the same price , no less than the Blood of Christ. And when you see a fit season , call them all together , and bless God for the Truths you have heard , and pray that he would bless them to you , and bring them back to your own and their minds by the repetition of them ; and demand of them an account , which to do is a very probable way to keep them from sleeping in the Congregation , and from a supine carelesness , and vain foolish absurd gazing about , and also of imprinting something upon their minds and thoughts , which may have a powerful influence upon their hearts and lives , and do them good afterward , yea as long as they live ; and when this is done , praise the Name of the Lord by singing of a Psalm , and pray to him for acceptance of , and a blessing upon what you have done , and so commit your selves and yours to his Fatherly Protection in the Night , and his gracious Conduct the following Week ; in the course whereof let there be nothing contradictory to your Lord's-days profession , or inconsistent with it . I beseech you draw an eaven Thred in Religion . These four things which I have spoken to you , are good for you , and necessary to be done , but they are generals : Therefore now I shall proceed to some more particular Directions , for the Instructing of your Families , which I would have you carefully to observe , and the great God shine upon your endeavours , that so they may prove very successful to your comfort and joy . First ; Begin with instructing them about the Being of a God. Though this Truth be ingraven in their hearts ; though the things that are made do plainly Preach to them his Eternal Power and Godhead , yet be not you silent , but speak the same thing to them over again and again , and so betimes , even as soon as ever you can ; principle them against that brutish , yet growing Atheism ; which is an Enemy to all Religion , and opens a wide and effectual Door unto all Villany and Profaneness . That Person who denies the Being of a God , is a sit Tool for the Devil to make use of , yea to imploy about his worst Services , and basest Drudgery . And thou Solomon my Son , know thou the God of thy Fathers , said good David ; 1 Chron. 28.9 . Know there is a God , and in particular know him that hath been , and is thy Fathers God , and let him be thy God too . Love him , chuse him , cleave to him . Shew them the Heaven and the Earth , and the things that are in them , and that these could not make themselves , but must of necessity be made by another ; how many second Causes soever may be enumerated , we cannot take up our rest in any of them , but must pass thorough them all , and ascend to the first Cause , and that first Cause that ens entium , that Source and Original of all Being , is God , and besides him there is none else ; Ier. 10.11 . The Gods that have not made the Heavens and the Earth , even they shall perish from the Earth , and from under these Heavens . Tell them , that upon this God all things that are have an absolute and necessary dependence . The Beam doth not more depend upon the Sun , than the Sun and all do upon God ; for them to subsist without him is a thing utterly impossible ; if he should withdraw his hand , Man would crumble , Earth would sink , the Heavens would shrink , and the Angels themselves drop from their present height into that first nothing out of which they were fetch'd by the Divine Power . Let them from you know , that they themselves are his Off-spring , and indebted to him for their Being , being by him formed in the Womb , and brought out of it ; and that he hath looked after them , and taken care of them ever since : when they hung upon the Breasts , he carried them in his Arms , and taught them to go , and held their Souls in Life , and provided for them ever since , and therefore they are not their own but his , he hath the Sovereign Right to them , and to Reign over them ; and that upon this account they are bound to love this God , and to fear this God , and to serve and honour him as long as they have any Being . Acquaint them with his being an holy God , in his Nature , in his Will , in all his Ways and Works , glorious in Holiness , and of purer Eyes than that he can behold Iniquity ; and that he hath given out a Law that is holy , just and good , which they and all are bound to obey , the Commandments of it not being grievous . And that he is every where present , observing how his Will is observed , and his Law obeyed , and his Creatures order and demean themselves ; he takes notice both of the Evil and the Good , of them that fear him , and them that fear him not , and doth so strictly observe , that he sets down in his Book of Remembrance those that fear him , and think upon his Name , and can set the sins of the wicked in order before them , yea the same order in which they were committed , with all the circumstances that cloathe them . And that he hath appointed a day wherein he will Judge the World in Righteousness by the Man whom he hath ordained , and bring to light the hidden things of dishonesty , and render unto every one according as their Works have been , whether good or evil ; Rom. 2.7 , 8 , 9. To them who by patient continuance in well doing seek for glory , and honour , and immortality . eternal life ; but unto them that are contentious , and do not obey the Truth , but obey Vnrighteousness , indignation and wrath : Tribulation and anguish upon every Soul of man that doth evil , of the Iew first , and also of the Gentile ; but glory , honour and peace to every man that worketh good , to the Iew first , and also to the Gentile ; for there is no respect of persons with God. That he hath an Heaven for the good , no other than the Habitation of his own Holiness and Glory , in which there are many Mansions , and Crowns , and Thrones , with unconceivable Felicity ; in his presence a fulness of Joy , and at his Right Hand Pleasures for evermore ; and besides that , an Hell for the wicked , a bottomless Pit , where there is a gnawing Worm that shall never die , and a Fire burning that is unquenchable , in which they shall for ever fry , scorch and burn without being ever consumed , and consequently they shall have weeping , and wailing , and gnashing of Teeth . Secondly ; Instruct them concerning the miserable , lost and undone condition of all Man-kind by reason of the Fall of the first Man. That when God had formed Man of the dust of the ground , and breathed into his Nostrils the Breath of Life , so that he became a living Soul , he was pleased not only to make him upright and in his own Image , induing him with all Natural Excellencies and Perfections befitting one who was to have Communion with his Creator , and Dominion over this Inferiour World , and to put him into a state of Happiness , appointing Paradise for the place of his Residence , or Royal Seat ; but also to enter into a Covenant of Friendship with him , thereby binding Man to a continuance in a course of Personal and Perfect Obedience to his great Lord , and thereupon by promise insuring to him an endless duration of his Life and Happiness , but withal threatning that in case of failure and disobedience , He should die the death ; viz. Temporal , Spiritual and Eternal . That this Covenant was not made with Adam alone , but with all Mankind who were to descend from him , and were considered as being then in his Loins , and He as the great Parent and common Person representing them , and so Adam breaking the Covenant by transgressing the Law of his Creation , and in particular , that positive Law which commanded him not to eat of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil , All Mankind sinned in him , and fell with him in that first Transgression , and so all the World is be-become guilty before God , and obnoxious to his Justice and Wrath ; all the World is become filthy and abominable . Primitive Righteousness is lost , and the Primitive Order broken , and we are all unclean ; all of us by principle and disposition Children of disobedience , and all by Nature Children of Wrath. And bring this home to them , and let them know that it is as much their Case as the case of any persons in the World , that they have the guilt of sin upon them , the sentence of Death denounced against them , a vile Heart and Nature within them , the Seed and Principle of all sin , which renders them prone to all manner of evils , even the vilest and most monstruous . This will tend to the hiding Pride from them , and preventing those high towering Conceits which they are ready to hugg and swell with through their self-unacquaintedness ; this may awaken them to the greater vigilance and care , and bring them to keep a stricter Eye upon their hearts ; and this may keep them from being much taken with , and doting upon those trifling childish vanities and youthful follies which the Souls of others are so much addicted and devoted to , while they hear there are things of infinitely greater importance and nearer concernment unto which they must attend . Thirdly ; Make it much your business to convince them of the evil of Sin. In order to their loathing it and themselves for it before God , do you , as much as you can , set it before them in its ugliness and deformity ; look upon it in the Glass of God's Law , and of Christ's Blood , and then draw its picture and shew it to them . History tells us , this of the Lacedemonians , that when they saw a filthy drunken Sott stagger and reeling in the Street , vomiting like a Dog , falling and tumbling in the Mire like a Swine , they would run into their houses , and fetch their young Children to the door , that they might behold how much he was unman'd , how like a Beast he made himself ( and by the way know , it is far better to be a Beast than to be like a Beast ) that so they might betimes learn to abhor and detest that brutish practice . Do you do the like , I mean , make unto them a true representation of the odiousness of Sin in general , yea , and of some Sins in particular , specially those which are most rampant , raging , and abounding in the times in which they live , and those Sins too with which they are most in danger of being infected ; paint them out in the blackest Colours that you can , as black as Hell , for indeed so they are . You cannot disparage Sin beyond its demerit ; you cannot speak too bad of it ; you cannot make it look worse than it is . As we cannot exceed nor rise too high in the commendation of God ; our greatest words are too little , our highest thoughts are too low . Angelical conceptions of God are infinitely short of his Perfection . He is exalted above all blessing and praise . So on the other side , we cannot speak too much in the dispraise of Sin ; our greatest anger against Sin is not hot enough , and our sharpest words against Sin are not keen enough . There is not to be found so great an evil in all the World as Sin is . Afflictions are not so bad as Sin. Poverty , Plague , Fire , Sword , Famine , all the desolations that be made in Towns , Cities , Countreys , not matter of so great Lamentation as Sin. They are Physick to cure , this the Disease to destroy ; they are Fire to purifie , this is Filth to pollute . Death it self doth only kill the Body , Sin ruins the Soul. Death sends the Body to a Bed of Dust , but Sin , if unpardoned , unmortified , sends both Soul and Body into a Bed of Flames . The Devil himself is not so bad as Sin : For he was an excellent Creature , a glorious Angel : There never was any thing of goodness in Sin , nor ever will. He was the Workmanship of God himself , but God had no hand in the making of Sin. It was Sin that turned him into a Devil . Hell is not so bad as Sin : For though it be a place of gross utter Darkness , yet there is seen the Purity and Holiness of God in his hatred of Sin , the Justice and Righteousness of God in the condemning and punishing of Sin ; there he declares his Wrath against all ungodliness and unrighteousness ; but there is no good , not the least good in Sin , it is a meer Anomia , disobedience to , and transgression of such a Law as is holy , just and good , it is evil throughout , only evil , and that continually . Sin is evil in its Nature , being contrary to the pure , holy , infinitely perfect and glorious Nature of God. There is nothing in all the World contrary to God but Sin , and what Sin hath made so . It s Nature is so bad , that nothing can rectifie it , nothing can mend it , nothing make it good : It is so bad , that God would not allow it a place in Heaven ; and the day is coming after which it shall be found no more upon Earth , but be for ever confin'd and shut up in Hell. Sin is evil in its Consequents and Effects . Indeed , who did ever gather Grapes of Thorns ? How can any good Fruit grow upon this Root of bitterness ? Let me briefly name some of those Mischiefs which Sin hath done , and still goeth on to do in the World. 1. Sin hath defac'd the Beauty of Man , sullied and stain'd his Glory , thrown him down from his Excellency , turn'd the Nazarite into an Ethiopian ; so that he , who at first was but a little lower than the Angels , is now become like unto the Beasts that perish , yea worse than they . 2. Sin hath spoiled Man's Communion with God , which was inconceivably more and better than the Delights of Eden , or his Dominion over the Creatures . As his Holiness did consist in his conformity to God , so did his Happiness in Communion with him ; but as soon as he had committed Sin , that stood as a middle Wall of Partition between them . 3. Sin hath broken Man's Peace , that Peace which once he had with God , and sown Enmity : So that God is angry with him , and he a Traitor , a Rebel against God. That Peace which was once in himself : The faculties of his Soul were once harmonious , Reason sitting in the Throne , Judgment ruling and governing , the Will and Affections knowing , keeping their place , and following the Dictates of the Understanding , but now there is discord and jarring ; the Understanding mistakes , the Will and Affections mutiny , so that frequently there are disorders and confusion in the Soul. And oh ! how dismal are the Contests oftentimes between a Man and his Conscience ; he crosseth his Conscience , and that will not bear it ; he wounds his Conscience , and then that rageth and storms , and laies about it as a fury ; and wheresoever he goes , it follows him with its clamours , so that he becomes a terrour to himself . 4. Sin hath brought in all the Troubles of Life . How many are they , and how great ! Who can understand his Errours ? who can sum up his Sorrows ? Most come into the World crying , and go complaining thorough it . In sorrow do Women bring forth Children ; some are grieved because they have none , and some more , because those they have are so bad . How are the endeavours of many vain and unsuccessful , their hopes blasted , and their expectations disappointed ! how are some wasted and consumed with sickness , others ground and tortur'd with pain ! Now a Fire comes and devours your pleasant things , burying your Habitations in their own Ashes , and then a War , which knows no compassion , but turns fruitful Lands first into Fields of Blood , and then into Wildernesses . 5. Sin hath introduced Death , and Arm'd against us that King of Terrours . Had not Man made Sin his Work , he had never receiv'd Death for his Wages ; had not Sin been , Man had either continued in a perfect and Paradisical State upon Earth , or else been translated into the Region of Light , and Life , and Love above ; but now if ever he would come thither , he must walk thorough the dark Shades , and be dissolv'd in order to his being glorified . We now mourn over a dead Friend , a dead Relation , let us remember that Sin kill'd them , Rom. 5.12 . By one Man Sin entred into the World , and Death by Sin , and so Death passed upon all Men , for that all have sinned . 6. Sin hath digg'd Hell. This is that Tophet which is mentioned in Isa. 30.33 . that is made deep and large , the Pile whereof is Fire and much Wood , the Breath of the Lord like a Stream of Brimstone doth kindle it . The Hell in the Conscience , which some Men do feel now , and that Hell into which all wicked wretches shall be tumbled at the last , are both of them the fruit of Sin. Now , my Friends , will you be careful in this matter ? will you consider , what Natures all brought into the World with them , how Sin dwells in you and yours ? Oh! shew unto them the evil that is in it , and the mischiefs that come by it ; for by doing so , you take a course to damp the Tinder that it may not catch Fire when the Spark is struck , and to arm them against Temptations , when they come out in their greatest violence ; this will tend to the preserving them from the path of the Destroyer , though it be such a beaten Road , and so full of Travellers . This was the Antidote that secur'd Ioseph from the Poison that was offer'd him in the Cup of Fornication . He was shreudly assaulted , and that more than once ; the on-set was renewed day by day , and he was in his youthful Blood , and on that account a great deal more in danger of being prevail'd upon , and wrought to a compliance ; but it was labour in vain , he looked upon the vile sinfulness of the thing , and that was more powerful to affright him from it , than the Charms of his Mistress were to allure him to it ; and therefore with a ( Pathos , or ) Zeal of Soul he cryed out , Gen. 39.9 . How can I do this great wickedness and sin against God ? He saw such a filthiness in that Sin , as that he loathed to touch either it or her that had tempted him to it , but fled from them both . Fourthly ; Be much in acquainting them with our Lord Iesus Christ , and the way of ruin'd Man's recovery by him , and by him alone . He being the only Mediator between God and Man , and the only Redeemer of God's Elect. Let them know that by Nature , and by reason of Sin their case is extreamly deplorable . When once our first Parents had transgrest , it was dark round about them ; nothing offer'd it self to their Eye that had a promising aspect . God that had been before their chiefest comfort , was then their greatest terrour ; his Voice that had been so sweet and pleasant to them , was then in their Ears like Thunder . As soon as Adam heard it , he was afraid and hid himself ; but as deplorable as sinful lapsed Man's case is now , blessed be free and rich Grace , it is not desperate , unless he himself by obstinate impenitency and unbelief do make it so . There is hope in Israel concerning this thing , because all-sufficient help is laid upon One that is mighty . 1. Though God was greatly affronted by the work of his own hands whom he had so obliged , and by that affront had been so highly provoked , yet being a God of bowels , whose compassions do not fail , in wrath he remembred mercy ; and though he had no yearnings over the sinning Angels , but immediately banished them from his presence , threw down from their first estate , and with indignation tumbled them into Hell , where he hath clapt upon them everlasting Chains , in which he reserves them to the Judgment of the great day , yet he had it in his hearty to pity and shew kindness to fallen Man ; it was the fixed resolve and purpose of his Grace to mend the marr'd Girdle , and to repair the broken Potsherds of the Earth , and of many among them to make Vessels of Honour fit for his Use and Service here , and for his Kingdom and Glory hereafter . 2. For that great and most blessed End he chose and sent his own Son , his only Son , his infinitely beloved Son , who was the brightness of his Fathers Glory , and the express Image of his Person , Man not being in a capacity to help himself , nor all the Angels in Heaven able to relieve him ; their back was too weak to bear that burden of guilt which lay upon him ; and their whole Stock too little to discharge those Debts which he had contracted ; and their Arm infinitely too short to reach him , and draw him out of that horrible Pit into which he had cast himself and all his Posterity . Now I say , when things were at this pass , God was pleased to send his Son to humble himself , to empty himself , to become poor , to become our Brother , and to assume our Nature with its sinless infirmities , and to be in the form of a Servant , of no reputation , made under the Law , that he might fulfil all Righteousness , and be the End thereof for Righteousness to all that are found in him , and to be made sin for us , i. e. a Sacrifice for sin ▪ that we might be made the Righteousness of God in him ; a Ransom ▪ that he might be a Redeemer . 3. The Son of God being thus chosen by the Father and sent did come , he most readily and freely came in the fulness of Time , and according to the Counsel of Peace which had been between them both , he came to do the Will of God ▪ he was incarnate , was manifest in the Flesh , yea in the likeness of sinful Flesh , and was numbred among Transgressors , the Iniquities of all his People were laid on him , and he did bear them in his own Body upon the Tree , becoming obedient to the Death , even the Death of the Cross ; he did die , the Prince of Life did die , his Blood was shed , that therein might be opened a Fountain for Sin , and for Vncleanness . 4. Neither is there Salvation in any other ; there is no other Name under Heaven by which Man may be saved , but his ; no Blood by which he may be washed but his , nor Righteousness by which he may be justified but his ; and therefore it is altogether in vain , meer lost labour to look for Salvation any where else : Whither shall we go , Lord ? said Peter , with Thee alone are the words of Eternal Life . And as it is in vain , so it is altogether needless ; for Christ is able to save to the utmost all those that come unto God by him . Mark it , them that come unto God by him , them without exception , all them , one and another , be they never so many , and be they what they will , never so bad , he is able to save them , and that compleatly , to the full perfection of Salvation , to the utmost of their dangers , to the utmost of their desires , to the utmost of Eternity , he is the Author of Eternal Salvation unto all them that obey him ; and truly be that hath a Salvation which will reach as far as Eternity , doth not , will not need one any longer . 5. This Salvation doth come most freely from him to all th●se that humbly seek it , Zech. 9.9 . Behold thy King cometh unto thee , he is just , having Salvation . He comes to poor Sinners , and brings his Salvation with him . He once came into the World in Person , to work Salvation for them , he still comes by his word and Spirit to bring Salvation to them . We before said , he is able to save , and he is full out as willing as able ; Oh! that lost ruin'd Sinners were as willing to accept Salvation , as he is to bestow it ; indeed what should hinder his being willing , all the charge is over , it did cost him a great deal , but it will cost him no more , no more blood , no more sweat , no more tears ▪ no more sighs , no more sorrow or shame : it is having the joy that was set before him , it is seeing the fruit of the travel of his Soul , that will issue in his satisfaction . It is but his own taking possession of that which he purchased for himself , and giving his People possession of that which he purchased for them . Hence we have reason to conclude that his heart is in the work , and that he doth it with joy and delight ; be much and often in speaking to your Families concerning this most sweet and precious Iesus , and the good will which he bears to the Children of Men. How he stands with his gracious arms stretched out to receive and embrace them that are willing to accept of him , and of Salvation , upon the terms propounded in the Gospel , and hath given us his faithful word for it , which he can no more deny , than he can deny himself , that whosoever cometh to him , he will in no wise cast out , tho' he hath been never so vile , though his Sins have been never so great , yet if he will but come , he shall find Grace to welcom him , and meet with a most kind reception ; he will spread his skirt over him for the covering of his shame and nakedness , and his wings too for the security of his Person , and the healing of his wounds . 5. Carefully instruct them about the Covenant of Grace , that there is a two-fold Covenant . 1. A Covenant of Works . 2. A Covenant of Grace . A Covenant of Works , which had Grace in it upon this account , that God should deal in a Covenant way with Man , which he needed not to have done . He was Mans Creator , gave him his being , and therefore was his undoubted and Sovereign Lord , and might have proceeded with him altogether in a way of Sovereignty , exacting obedience of him , and let him refuse it or fail in it at his peril . It was a gracious condescension in God to act in a Covenant-way , and oblige himself to reward man for his obedience , this is called a Covenant of Works , because therein Life was promised to Man upon the terms of his personal perfect obedience , and his perseverance therein . Now this Covenant was transgress'd and broken by our first Parents , soon after that it was made ; so that no good , no happiness is to be hoped for from it , by us , or by another ; the Penalty indeed threatned , upon the breach thereof may be most righteously exacted , and so it will of all those who are found guilty , and continue still under it , not having fled for refuge to lay hold upon the hopes set before them , i. e. not having closed with Christ , and by Faith taken Sanctuary in him , but no life is to be had by it , the Law cannot justifie because it is grown weak through the flesh , Rom. 8.3 . weak to the purpose of justification , and this was by accident , through Mans fault , Mans weakness is the reason of the Laws weakness , the Law was able to have justified innocent perfect Man , but it cannot justifie lapsed sinful Man. Homo est impotens ad praestandam legem , Lex ei Vires dare non potest ; Man is too weak to perform the Law , and the Law cannot give him strength . In a word , Man being now fallen , corrupted , infeebled , and throughout depraved , he cannot possibly keep the Law , and therefore that cannot justifie him . But there is another Covenant , rightly called a better Covenant , which God hath been pleased to make better for us as the case stands , for it containeth in it better Promises , Heb. 8.6 . and is in the hand of a Mediatour Jesus Christ our fast Friend , a Covenant by which David saw all his Salvation secur'd , and in which he summ'd up all his desire , knowing it to be everlasting , ordered in all things , and sure , 2 Sam. 23.5 . In this Covenant ( as in all ) there is a mutual stipulation , it hath its requiries , and its promises , by it Man is ingaged to believe in Jesus Christ with all his heart , to accept of him , and close with him as he is by the Father and himself offered in the Gospel , to receive him in all his Offices , as Prophet , to Teach , and as King , to Govern , and Command , as well as Priest to Attone , and Interceed and Bless ; and thereupon it promiseth Salvation , it requires repenting of Sin , and forsaking it ; and thereupon it promiseth Mercy , and the blotting out of Transgressions , it requires returning to God , and the performance of sincere obedience , and to every one that doth so , God engageth himself to be their God , for this is a Covenant of Reconciliation , he engageth to pardon their Sins so fully , so abundantly , that they shall be as if they had never been , white as Snow , and to receive them into favour , and to love them with an everlasting love , and to give them grace , and glory , Crowning at length , and satisfying them with happiness . All those that have not laid hold upon , and are not in this Covenant of Grace , are to this day under the Covenant of Works , and so in a state of Damnation ; and all those that are in the Covenant of Grace , must come up to the terms of it . Let Men in this erroneous , teachie , froward , quarrelsom Age say what they will , and make never so much noise , the Covenant of Grace hath its Conditions , though blessed be God , what it requires it gives , and we must carefully look that we come up to the terms of it , and that there be in us an answerableness to its requiries , if ever we would share in the blessings of it . He that believeth shall be saved , but he that believeth not shall be damned ; repent , and your Sins shall be blotted out , when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord , but except ye repent , ye shall all perish . Christ will be the Author of Eternal Salvation unto all them that they obey him , but he shall at the Great Day be revealed from Heaven with his mighty Angels , in flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God , and that obey not the Gospel . And then it will appear , that Obedience and Holiness are something , that to fear the offending of God , and a diligent care of pleasing him , were other manner of things than many mistaken Persons do now take them to be . Let your Families know that impenitency doth bind upon Men and Women the guilt of all their Sins , and that without Holiness no Man shall see the Lord , and that Christ came to save from Sin , as well as Wrath , and to Redeem , not only from Hell , and Condemnation , but likewise from a vain and vicious Conversation , 1 Pet. 1.18.19 . Sixthly , Frequently put those who are Members of your Families , and under your charge , in mind of their being in Covenant with God , and of their having been Baptized , and so received the Seal or Token of the Covenant , inculcate this in your Discourses with them . I hope that all your Children and Servants ( to you I now speak , who are Members of this numerous Congregation ) have been made Partakers of that great and precious Ordinance , and you ought to tell them of it again , and again , for by that means you may do them much good , in making them serious and thoughtful ; let them know from you , that they were not by their Parents left at liberty to chuse whether they would be the Lords , or not , whether they would serve him , or not , whether they would bow their necks to the yoke of Christ , or be the Sons and Daughters of Belial . But their Parents , whose they were , and who had a right to dispose of them , did , in conscience of their own duty , and in dear love to them , bind them to God betimes , they did devote and consecrate them to God , they did as it were , Seal Indentures between them , and God ; so that now they are Gods Covenant People , his Covenant Servants . And tell them that being in Covenant with God , they shall have all the good of the Covenant , all the Mercies and Blessings of it , in case they do not deal falsely therein ; they may rejoyce in it , as that which is security enough , they may live upon it , and that comfortably in the worst times , and they may plead it with God , and say with David , remember thy word unto thy Servant , upon which thou hast caused me to hope . But that it will be sad and dreadful for them to sin against it , I mean wilfully , sins in them are of a deeper die , and have a louder voice than the Sins of others in the World , and by them God is justly more provoked : meerly to break one of Gods Commandments is nothing near so bad as to break Covenant with God , that is an accent upon the head of Sin , and doth greatly aggravate it ; and those Persons that are guilty thereof , may expect , and with trembling think how severe God will be at last , and what fierce wrath he will pour out upon them , when he comes to avenge the quarrel of his Covenant . Labour to convince them what a dismal thing it would be for them to withdraw themselves from God , whose they were by Covenant ; for them who had been in their Infancy by their Parents given up to God , now to run cross to them , and to null what they had done as much as in them lies , and to give up themselves to Sin , and to the Devil , and to sell themselves to do evil ; this is a throwing dirt in the face of their Parents , as if they had chosen ill for them , and bound them to a bad Trade , and an hard Master ; and this is a reproach to God , as if he had been a Wilderness to them , and a Land of Darkness , and they had found iniquity upon him , and this cannot but be an high provocation , and must needs raise storms of wrath and fury . Seventhly , Be very much and often commending to them the Service of God , and the Yoke of Iesus Christ , that they may not be prejudiced by wrong notions , nor mis-led by misapprehensions of him , as the unprofitable Servant pretended to be , who looking upon his Lord as Austere , and made up altogether of Severity , therefore would do nothing for him , but e'en buried his Talent in a Napkin . That Gods Service is perfect Freedom , and then do Men and Women walk at liberty , when they keep his Precepts . Whereas the Service of Sin is no better than Slavery , and its work a drudgery ; the Sweet-Meats of Sin are wrapt up in a Curse , and its most pleasant ways lead down to the Chambers of Death . Whereas the Yoke of Christ is easie , being lin'd with Love , and his Burthen is light , having both Wings , and the Shoulder of God to help them to bear it . In the service of Sin a poor Creature spends all at his own cost like the poor Israelites under Pharaoh , and his Cruel Task-Masters , who were not only forced to make Brick , but likewise to find Straw to make it with , and then the Wages given at last will be death . Whereas God doth cut out Work for his Servants , and give them strength to do it , he chalks out their way , and inlargeth their hearts to run it , he giveth power to the faint , when they have none of their own , he supplies them with enough , so that Paul said , He could do all things thro' Christs strengthning him . Shew to them the reasonableness of the Law of God , which hath been given out to Man for the Directory of his Life , and the Rule of his Actions , that it is pure , and perfect , and worthy both of our obedience , and our Love , yea , doth and will afford great , singular delight to a person of a right frame and constitution ; and well it may , seeing the Law is holy , and the Commandments holy , just , and good , Rom. 7.12 . It is such a Law was fit for God to give , and fit for Man to receive ; it being purity throughout , and is suitable to the Nature of God , who is an Infinite , Holy , and Righteous Being . It was also suitable to the Nature of Man , possible , easie , pleasant to him before he was degenerate , corrupt , and depraved . Let us run through the Commandments , and at the first view it will appear they are not grievious , as the beloved Disciple saith , 1 Iohn 5.3 . What can be more reasonable than that we should have and own , love and trust in , fear and serve him for our God , and him only who is God indeed , and God alone , besides whom there is none else ? What could with greater reason be forbidden , than the making of any Graven Image , or the likeness of any thing which is in Heaven above , or in the Earth beneath , or in the Waters under the Earth , so as to fall down and Worship them ? for what can be more ridiculous , than to give Divine Honour to that which Man himself gave being to ? what more gross and egregious nonsence , than to call that a God , part of which is consumed in the fire ? Is it not reasonable that we all should sanctifie the name of God , and not prophane it nor take it in vain , and that we should cheerfully spend some time in his Service , who is the great Lord of time , and keep holy the Sabbath Day , laying out that seventh part of time which he hath chosen and sanctified , and set apart for himself in his service and Worship ? what exceptions can be made against Honouring our Fathers , and Mothers ; Childrens honouring their Parents , Servants their Masters and Mistresses , Inferiours their Superiours , Subjects their Governours ? what more just than that Men should not kill others by violence , nor themselves by intemperance , and excess ; nay , that they should not hate one another , nor be angry without a cause , nor too much , nor too long ? What also can be with reason objected against that Law of God , which forbids Rapine , Theft , Robbery , Adultery , and all Uncleanness , all Reviling , Slandering , Backbiting , and bearing false witness against our Neighbours , and also coveting those things which are not our own , but commandeth us to sit down contented with those things which we have , whether they be more or less , till God shall please to carve out for us a larger and more liberal allowance . Surely as to all these things , save only the seventh part of time , the light of Nature would dictate and lead to the practice of them . Reason it self doth suggest and teach , that to be religious , righteous , good , temperate , chast , kind , meek , humble , and lowly , is fit for Men ; it highly becomes them , and doth greatly conduce and contribute to their honour , and peace , and prosperity , to their welfare and comfort every way ; these things give them boldness , make their faces shine , and commend them to all that know them . But on the other side , injustice , oppression , disobedience , drunkeness , uncleanness , theft , lying , subornation , perjury , false witness , swearing , debauchery , and prophaneness of all sorts do offend Heaven , and Earth , they tend to the dishonour and displeasing of God , and to the undoing of Persons , and Families , yea , to the ruine of Societies , and Kingdoms , and the whole World , for these things sake the wrath of God comes down upon the Children of disobedience . To shut up this particular , let them know , there is none of Gods Commandments but what doth evidently and directly make for Mans own good , it tends to the preserving of his Name , that it may be like precious Ointment , without a dead Flye in it , and of his Life , that his days may be long in the Land , and of his Health , that his life may be comfortable as well as long ; and of his Estate , that that may prosper and increase , and not be blasted with a Curse , and so consume and melt like Snow before the Sun , they have a benign and kind influence upon Mans whole interest , Godliness being profitable for all things , for Soul , Body , and Calling , for Time , and Eternity , for the Life that now is , and for that which is to come ; and there is nothing can be named , by which we can possibly so much promote our own good , as by a cordial and constant respect to all God's Commandments ; we shall not then be ashamed nor repent . Oh! how sweet and pleasant will it be when we can in truth say with holy Paul , Herein do we exercise our selves , to keep a Conscience void of offence both toward God and toward Man , Acts 24.16 . Eightly ; Acquaint them with the present Advantages that come by Religion , and a consciencious performance of Duty . God's Israel have their Manna now , and their Clusters by the way , in the Wilderness , as well as a Land flowing with Milk and Honey at the last . As there are some drops before the Storm , so First-fruits before the Harvest . David saith , God's Commandments are right and true , more to be desired than Gold , much fine Gold , sweeter also than Honey and the Honey-comb , and that in keeping them there is great reward , Psal. 19.11 . There is Meat in the very Mouth of duty ; he doth not say , there shall be a great reward , though that is true , it shall be in Heaven , but there is so . God is now a Rewarder of them that diligently seek him , and are careful to obey him ; his Servants shall not stay for all , but have something down , the Feast is to come , but there are foretastes at present . We frequently see that Sin doth carry its punishment along with it . Soon after Cain had kill'd his Brother , the Innocent Blood cried , and Judgment was in part Executed . Quickly after Iudas had play'd the Traytor , God made him his own Executioner . While Belshazzar was impiously Carousing in the Vessels of the Sanctuary , there was an Hand-writing upon the Wall , and that very Night was he slain . So God hangs up some Notorious Criminals , as it were in Chains , in terrorem , that others might be warned and frighted , and some restraint laid upon , and bounds set to wickedness , which would otherwise overflow all , and that some order might be preserved and kept up in the World. On the other side , God doth even in this Life frequently reward good Men , and both give them Spiritual Blessings in Heavenly Things , and outward Blessings in Earthly Things , thereby making it evident to all that have Eyes in their Heads and will observe , that it is not in vain to fear God. And though his upright Iob's are not so sordidly Mercinary as to serve him meerly for hire , yet he is so infinitely good and gracious that they shall not serve him for nought ; but while they walk before him in their Integrity , and make it their desire and endeavour to please , and obey him , he watcheth over them with a never-slumbering Eye , and takes special Fatherly Care of them , and doth them good ; they have peace in their Breasts , and Families , protection about them and all that they have , and also Food convenient for them , a supply of all their need . And though some others of his People who are dear unto him , and exceeding precious in his sight , have but little , a very little of this Worlds Goods , but from Hand to Mouth , yet they can be cheerful , sitting down to a Dinner of Herbs , and eat them with a merry Heart , giving God thanks , because they know they have the love of God in it , and the Blessing of God with it , and by consequence that little which they have is better than the Riches and great Revenues of many wicked ; their Brown Bread is better than the others Venison , which is pepper'd hot with a Curse , and their Cup of cold Water is better than the others most generous Wine , because the Wrath of God is dropt into it , and all shall at last be dearly paid for , when Divine Justice shall bring in the Reckoning . Shew them that the Service of God , and a care to please him , is the way to get the good things of the World , both the Creatures , and the Comfort of them ; for , as we before said , Godliness hath the Promises of this Life , i. e. both of Life it self , and what doth appertain to it . And as it is the Blessing of God that maketh Rich , so his Blessing is upon his People , upon them , and only upon them . Others have no Interest in the Promise , and therefore cannot lay claim to the Blessing , nor groundedly expect and hope for it . Profane Esau would fain have had the Blessing , he ask'd it , he beg'd it , he wept for it , but alas ! it was gone before , Isaac had past it to his Brother Iacob , and he was not to be alter'd ; Esau had contemned the Birthright , and sold it for a Mess of Pottage , and therefore he should not have the Blessing : He found in his Father no place for Repentance , although he sought it carefully with Tears : Profaneness excludes from the Blessing . But withal , take some pains with them , yea , do all that you can to keep their Hearts from being ingaged to the World , and their Affections from being wedded and devoted to these sublunary Enjoyments ; do not commend to them fine Cloaths , gorgeous Attire , and outward Bravery , that is the way to make them proud , but the Robe of Righteousness , a putting on of the Lord Jesus Christ by Faith and Imitation , and a being cloathed with Humility . Do not commend to them earthly Riches , which reach not the Soul , which are uuncertain , and take unto themselves Wings and flee away , leaving the poor Owner in a worse condition than they found him but commend to them the good part that shall never be taken from them , the Riches of Faith , and an Interest in the Promises . Not worldly Grandeur , which is so slippery , nor high places from which so many tumble , and fall , and break their Necks ; but great goodness , great measures of Faith and Holiness , great serviceableness in their several places ; labour to convince them of the littleness , and vanity , and nothingness of those things which the bewitched worldlings do so madly dote upon , and so idolatrously hug , and pursue still after with so much eagerness , as if they could never have enough ; and indeed let them get never so much of them , they will never find enough in them , but in the fulness of their sufficiency they will be in straits , Iob 20.22 . Such Men are in straits during that fulness of sufficiency ; though they have abundance they do not think it enough , their condition is high , and their outward comforts are large , but their spirits are too big for their condition , and so they are pinch'd and pain'd like a Gouty Foot in a narrow and little Shooe. And many times God chuseth that as his Season , for the making both his Power and Anger known upon them ; when they are at the full they are eclipsed , when their Cup runs over , he empties them , when they stand st●utting and vapouring as Nebuchadnezzar in his Palace , Is not this great Babylon which I have built ; then Divine Providence trips them up , and lays their Honour in the Dust. Turn away their Eyes from beholding these Vanities , and direct them to more noble and amiable Objects that do better deserve their Love , and will requite it at a greater rate ; make them to know there are other manner of Beauties and Glories to be had , and therefore to be sought and looked after , those Riches and Honour which are with Wisdom , durable Riches and Righteousness , Prov. 8.18 . Tell them that one Drachm of Saving Grace is better than Thousands of Gold and Silver ; that Christ is better than Creatures , God better than all the World , and his Favour than Life , his Smiles than the brightest Sun-shine ; therefore Moses esteemed the reproach of Christ greater Riches than the Treasures of Egypt , and rather chose to suffer affliction with the People of God , than to enjoy the pleasures of Sin for a Season , Heb. 11.25 , 26. And David counted one day in God's Courts better than a Thousand elsewhere , and would rather be a Door-keeper in the House of his God , than dwell in the Tents of Wickedness . Once more convince them , if it be possible , that beginning with God is beginning at the right end , this is the best method , and will be most successful . To set our Affections upon things above is the directest and most compendious way of attaining those things which are here below . Let a Man make sure of Christ , and he may very well trust God with all his outward concerns . The Lord is my shepherd ; let that be the Proposition , and then , I shall not want , is a good conclusion by no means to be denied , Psal : 23.1 . whereas setting Affections upon things below is the way to miss of those things which are above . Dunghil-rakers do not find the Pearl of Price . Saul indeed seeking the Asses , lighted upon the Kingdom , but I think the Bible affords not such another instance . Paul tells us , Destruction is the end of those whose God is their belly , and who mind earthly things . Minding earthly things as the chiefest good is the high way to Beggary and Ruin in the end . They that will be rich fall into Temptation , and not seldom under Heart-wounding , Heart-breaking Disappointments . Our dear Lord Jesus , who is the faithful and true Witness , and the wisest Counsellor , hath given us excellent Advice commended by a sure and comfortable Promise ; Seek ye first the kingdom of God , and his righteousness , and all these things shall be added to you , Mat. 6.33 . All these things added ? Yes , so far as your Heavenly Father sees them necessary for you , nay more , so far as he seeth them good for you ; no good thing shall he with hold ▪ and truly that is far enough , farther than so they are not to be desired , farther than so they are not worth the having . Lastly ; In your Families , and among them who are committed to your Charge , direct your Speech very much to the great things of the other World , and that recompence of Reward which is to come . God took Abram after Lot was separated from him , and said to him , lift up now thine Eyes , and look from the place where thou art , northward , and southward , and eastward , and westward , for all the Land which thou seest , to thee will I give it , and to thy seed for ever , Gen. 13.14 , 15. So do you take the Members of your Families , and bid them lift up their Eyes , and look off from this dirty World , up to that glorious Canopy over their Heads , the Firmament bespangled with Sun , Moon and Stars ; that is but the Floor or Pavement of the Presence Chamber of the King of Glory , the Bride-Chamber of the Lamb , the Seat of the Blessed , which he will give for an Everlasting Inheritance unto them who have chosen , and love , and obey him . Be often and often discoursing to them of Heaven , the Company there , the Imployment there , the Felicity and Satisfaction there , the Vision and Fruition that the Saints shall have there of God and Christ , whom they shall see not as in a Glass darkly , but Face to Face , the sweet Fellowship and Communion they shall there have with God in the greatest Intimacy , without the least disturbance or interruption ; there being no sinful withdrawings from God on their part , and no angry withdrawings from them on God's part , and no Enemy to divert the Mind , or break the Peace , or abate the Delight , but a fulness of Joy they shall have in the presence of their God and Saviour , and at his Right Hand Pleasures for evermore . Let them know what you can of the greatness of those Preparations which he hath made for them that love and fear him , even such things as Eye hath not seen , nor Ear heard , nor hath entred into the Heart of Man. There is an inheritance incorruptible , undefiled , and that fadeth not away , reserved in Heaven for them ▪ As there are all dimensions in the love which Christ bears to them , heighth , depth , length , and breadth ; so there are in that Happiness and Glory which he hath prepared for them . Mind them of the nature of this their present Life , that it is but transitory , in a continual flux , we die daily ; look how much we have liv'd , so much we are already dead ; our Candle is burning down into the Socket , and the Oil of our Lamp spends apace ; not a Day , Hour nor Minute passeth over our Heads but it bringeth us nearer to our Grave , which is the House of all the Living ▪ and unto it we are continually travelling . It is a troublesome Life ; sin deserves it should be a lamentation thoroughout , and God might make it so ; however they will find it checquer'd ; be their Morning never so fair and serene , yet their Day will be overcast before Night comes ; and though at the first setting out they have a pleasant Gale , yet they must expect to meet with many a furious Storm before they come into their Harbour . Children come crying into the World , Men and Women go sighing thorough it , and groaning out of it . Many are the afflictions of the very righteous , though God will deliver them out of all . It is an uncertain Life . Who knows what is in the Womb of Providence , or what may be the product of a day ? we are but short-sighted , and cannot tell what stands at the Door , ready to draw the Latch . Samson found Honey in the Carcase of a Lion , but many find Wormwood and Gall in the very Hive where they expected Honey , and what they did hope would have been their greatest comfort doth prove their bitterest vexation , their greatest torment ; and what wise Man would take up with such a Life , since a better may be made sure of ? But again , this is but a short Life , a span long , three or fourscore Years to come seem a great while , but when past , they are as a Tale that is told . Few and evil , said good Iacob , have the days of the years of my Pilgrimage been ; and truly , since sin and sorrow do make them evil , it is a Mercy that God doth make them few . But since our Lives are short , we should not be covetous , for a little will serve the turn , a little will serve to carry us thorough our Journey . See that there be but Oil in the Vessel against the Bridegroom's coming , and then it is no great matter though there is but a little Meal in the Barrel , let them have their Bellies filled with hid Treasures whose Portion is in this Life ; let them hunt after great things here , who are to have their good things , their all here . But insisth much among them upon that Life which is to come , that will know no end , but hath an Eternal duration . O , Eternity , Eternity , maist thou strike us all with astonishment , and fill our Souls with an aweful regard . There will be another state into which we must every one pass at death , that will be unalterable , a state that is altogether a stranger to hope , or to fear , that will know nothing to abate its sorrows , or to lessen its comforts ; that hath either Meridian brightness without any obscuring shade , or scorching Flames without the least refreshing drop ; such a state as will be either inconceivably Happy , or unspeakbly Miserable , and that to all everlasting . The Blessed shall from their heighth of Bliss look down without any danger of falling , and the Damned shall in their Abyss of Misery and Woe look up without any possibility of rising . So Abraham told the Rich Glutton in Hell , Between us and you there is a great gulf fixed , so that they which would pass from hence to you cannot , neither can they pass to us that would come from thence . Now as there is a double end , so there is a double way leading to them . That way which leads to Life is a narrow way , and the Gate strait , there is not room enough for a Man and his Lusts , Nature must be curb'd , and the Flesh Crucified , and the Body kept under , and self denied . That way which leads to Hell is broad , and the Gate wide ; there a Man may take with him his Sins , and his Pleasures , he may fare deliciously every day , and be wicked every day ; he may live without God in the World , and have Fellowship with Devils , and fulfil the Wills of the Flesh. He need not care what he doth , who doth not care what becomes of him . Well , assure them of this , that Sin ushers in Misery , and the ways of Sin go down to death , its steps take hold of Hell ; but a Life of Holiness and Duty , a Life of Faith and Obedience to God carrieth to Heaven and the Happiness above . Mark the perfect Man , and behold the upright ; see the last of him , for the end of that man is peace : Though the way have its difficulties , an up-hill way that calls for great pains and labour ; though it be hedg'd up with Thorns , and lin'd with Enemies , yet it hath a good end . The good Servant that Trades with his Talent , minds his business , and is faithful in his little , shall be made Ruler over much ; and when he hath finished his work enter into the Joy of his Lord. The Reward will be sure and great , what will both issue in abundant satisfaction , and raise the highest admirings ; so that the glorified Soul shall think , and say as David did upon another account , O Lord , who and what are all my services , and what my Fathers house , that thou hast brought me hitherto . Bring them by degrees to understand something of what it is to behold God's Face in Righteousness , and to be satisfied with his Likeness ; to lye at the Fountain-head of Happiness , and to delight ones self in the bottomless , boundless Ocean of Goodness . How pleasant it will be to reflect upon the troubles of the past Life , the violent Storms they past thorough , the scorns and abuses of a foolish and mad World , the rage and fury of wicked , unreasonable Men , and what a change is made ; how ill it was , how well it is ; how sweet it must needs be to be above the reach of all sorrows and wants , of all Enemies and fears , and to be incompast , feasted fill'd with the best and choicest delights . What a priviledge will it be to sit down as welcom Guests with Abraham , Isaac and Iacob in the Kingdom of God at a Feast of Glory , there to take your fill of Love to all Eternity , when you shall see so many shut out ? What an Honour will it be to sit upon Christ's Throne ? How easie to lye in the Bosom of Abraham ? How comfortable to be ever with the Lord ? How infinitely is this beyond all the Pleasures that Sin can afford its Votaries , beyond having the Belly filled with hid Treasures ? Will you do this , you that are Governours of Families ? Oh! How good is it ! How much your Duty , and how much good may you do ! This is the way to render them serious and thoughtful , the way to make Sin odious and abominable to them , so that they shall not desire to taste of those Dainties , this is the way to commend Godliness and Religion to them , so that they shall be like the Chariots of Amminadab ; this also is the way to blunt the edge , and break the force of a Temptation , when it would at any time draw them away from God , and take them off from the performance of that duty which they owe unto him . I will here add these two things , and desire you to put them in practice , in order to the rendering these Instructions or Teachings the more effectual . First ; Go over with these things again and again ; and insist much upon them ; yea , though they be unwilling to hear , yet be not you weary of speaking ; nay , though they cast your words behind their Backs , do you still follow them with more . The Prophet Ezekiel was to continue speaking to the People of Israel , though they were a Rebellious House , nor might he be silent till God shut up his Mouth , and struck him Dumb ; so must you do with your Families ; though they be dull and slow to learn , yet teach ; though they be obstinate and stiff necked , yet counsel and perswade ; let there be frequent repetitions of the same Truths , and the same Advice , and the same Arguments . Gutta cavat lapidem . Drops of Rain often falling make an impression upon a Stone . Immortal Souls are so exceeding precious , that the gaining , the saving of one is worth the labour of a Life . How long did God wait upon you ? And how often did he speak to you before you would hear ; do you the like to yours . As Children must be often fed , so they must be often taught . Precept must be upon Precept , and Line upon Line , here a little and there a little . The understandings of young ones are weak , and therefore you must deal with them in all plainness , and by degrees . They are like narrow mouth'd Bottles , not receptive of much at a time , and you cannot pour in much at once , but by little and little . Drop in Truths , Counsels , and Instructions into them according to their ability to receive them . Their Memories also are labil and slippery , too tenacious of bad things , but not of the best , like Sieves that let the Flower go , and only retain the Bran ; as they are not capable of receiving much at once , so but weak in keeping that which they have received . The Apostle saw cause of writing thus to the Hebrews , Ye have forgotten the Exhortation which speaks to you as unto Children , Heb. 12.5 . It is certain there is too much of this to be found among Men , grown Men , yea , grown Saints ; we read the Word , and forget what we read ; we hear Sermons , and forget the Sermons we hear , we forget the Promises we make , and the Mercies we receive , and the Experiences we have had of the power , care , and goodness of God. Men and Women are apt to forget Truths , Precepts , Counsels and Exhortation ; we did stand in need of an Ordinance ; the blessed Sacrament to put us in mind of Christ himself ; and it is no wonder then if young ones be so , their Memories are leaking Vessels , and those impressions which are made upon their Minds and Affections do quickly wear out again ; and therefore there is an absolute necessity of our going over with the same things again ; upon this account , as well as that of the backwardness and great natural aversness of their wills from that which is good , daily Instructions are as needful for them as their daily Bread. Secondly ; Back your holy Instructions with holy Exhortations ; and let all your gracious Counsels be followed and prest upon them with earnest perswasions and intreaties , and so give forth and accompany the light with a due measure of heat , by that means endeavouring to work upon their Hearts as well as upon their Heads , that you may bring them to the knowledge of the Truth , yea , and to a receiving it in the love thereof ; to an understanding of the way wherein they ought to go , and likewise to a sincere desire and fixed resolution , through Divine Assistance of walking therein . Whatsoever there is of wholesom and gracious Counsel which you apply to them , be sure to chafe it in with a warm Hand ; it is sad to think how coldly some Ministers preach , so that their Auditors may sit and freeze under them ; and also how some speak of God , and the things of God in their Houses , as if they were not concerned in them , or rather , as if they were ashamed of them ; do you so discourse of these things , as become those who believe your selves , and are affected your selves , and do-know the Terrours of the Lord , and are indeed in good earnest ; do what you can to convince them of these two things . First ; That you have an high esteem and valuation of Religion , and all that appertains and belongs to it . The Truths of God , and the Ordinances of God , and the Day of God , and the Ways of God , that you do not look upon these things as trivial matters , of none , or but little importance , but of a more excellent nature and higher concernment than any thing else in the World. Again , manage these Exhortations with so much prudence , love , and fervour , as that they may be convinced . Secondly ; That you are really and heartily set for the doing of them good ; and that your great aim is as the approving of your selves to God in the consciencious and faithful discharge of your duty , so the doing of them good , and the promoting of the Spiritual and Eternal welfare of their Souls ; and herein imitate David's example in the counselling of his Son Solomon , 1 Chron. 28.9 . And thou Solomon my Son , know thou the God of thy Father , and serve him with a perfect heart , and with a willing mind , for the Lord searcheth all hearts , and understandeth all the imaginations of the thoughts ; if thou seek him he will be found of thee , but if thou forsake him he will cast thee off for ever . So much may suffice to be by me spoken as to these parts of your duty , Family-Prayer , and Family-Instruction ; the good Lord grant that what hath been declared and proved to be your duty may be forthwith and always put in practice by every one whose duty it is . I now proceed to the third part of that Counsel which I purposed and promised to give unto you who are the Parents and Governours of Families ; and Oh! let it be acceptable to you , and prevalent with you . It is this , Look wisely and carefully to your own Carriages and Conversations , and be sure that you order them aright ; be circumspect , curious , exact , think not that you may do what you please , but labour to do what you should ; what becomes both your place and your profession ; in Psal. 123.2 . the Prophet speaks of the Eyes of Servants looking to the hands of their Masters , and the Eyes of a Maiden looking unto the hand of her Mistress , for direction and supply , for help and assistance . I may likewise say , the Eyes both of Children and of Servants are and will be upon the Lives and Actions of their Father and Mother , of their Master and Mistress , and therefore your Eyes should be very much upon your selves , and I count it your wisdom and duty to weigh the words you speak in their hearing , and the actions you do in their sight , as well as in the hearing and sight of any other graver and greater Persons . Never think it enough to speak to them good things , as long as you set before them bad examples ; for they will sooner do as you do than as you say . Praecepta docent , exempla trahunt ; Precepts do but teach , Examples draw . This was Christ's manner of teaching , he said , Learn of me , for I am meek and lowly . Learn this by my Doctrine , yea , and by my Disposition also ; in his Mind , Life and Death , he sets us an example that we should tread in his steps ; and since that was his way of teaching it should be ours . That was a good saying , Oh! that it were at this day true of all those upon whom the Name of God is called . Non magna loquimur sed magna vivimus ; we do not only speak great things , but we live great things ; we speak of Christ , and we live Christ ; we speak of the Gospel , and we live the Gospel ; we profess Godliness , yea , and we practice Godliness ; know for certain , it is your practising that which is good , that is the best and most probable way of commending it to others ; by this means they may be induced to believe that Religion is not meer notion but a reality ; that it is a thing practicable , yea , and that it is pleasant . It is your drawing up in your own lives a beautiful , lovely Picture of Religion , that is the most likely way to make them full in love with it , and make it your business to see to it that there be as few spots in it as possible ; for however some vain Persons do absurdly think spots in their Faces are their Ornaments , and set them off ; yet sure all will believe and grant that spots in the Life are blemishes , and a meer deformity . Hence it is that Wives are commanded to carry as becomes them in their Conjugal Relation , Being in subjection to their own Husbands , and of a chast conversation coupled with fear , that if any do not obey the word , they may without the word be won by the conversations of their Wives , 1 Pet. 3.1 , 2. And this , Oh! this is that which I would gladly have among all upon whom the Name of Christ is called ; as for the wicked and profane of the Age , if they hate to be reformed , and are resolved upon their way , they may go on . He that is unjust , let him be unjust still , and he that is filthy , let him be filthy still , Rev. 22.11 . Yes , if he will , let him , and see what will come of it . But , I say , as for Professors , let them live up to the Principles of their Religion , let them abstain from all appearance of evil , let their Conversation be as it becomes the Gospel of Christ , and in all things adorn the Doctrine of our God and Saviour , let your Conversation be a God-honouring Conversation , and a World-condemning Conversation , and a Soul-winning Conversation ; Oh! the good that might by this be done , how much might the Credit and Honour of Religion be retrieved , which hath sunk and lost so much in this Degenerate , Atheistical , and Wicked Generation in which there is nothing more common , though most unjust , than for vile Wretches to take up all the dirt which they find in the Lives of some Professors , and throw it in the Face of our glorious Religion ? but woe be to the Men and Women who give the occasion , and by whom the offence cometh , it had been better for them they had never been Born. Woe to the Men and Women that pray in their Families , and then contradict their own Prayers by an unsuitable Conversation , that give very wholesom Counsel and Advice , but live quite contrary to it . What these Men Build with one hand , they pull down with the other ; these are the Persons that do Religion a mischief ; through them it is that the Name of God is Blasphemed among others , Rom. 2.24 . Therefore here also I will give you some Directions , and desire you carefully to follow them . First ; Look to it that you be of an unblameable Conversation . I know that while you are here you cannot be altogether sinless . Paul groaned under a Body of Death , but he could not get rid of it ; but if you will walk so wisely and circumspectly as you ought , and have power to do , you may be blameless ; Daniel was so , so accurate in the management of himself , so true to his trust , that though his great Preferment drew upon him the Envy of the Court , and his high Place render'd him the more conspicuous and visible , and those that were his Enemies watch'd him narrowly , yet they despair'd of finding any occasion against him , save in the matter of his God , Dan. 6.5 . He would break the Laws of Men when they did cross the Law of God , and that was his Duty , and still will be his Honour . It is an excellent thing , that which nearly , greatly concerns us all , so to carry as that our own Consciences may not blame us ; one of which is more than a Thousand Witnesses , and will be a greater evidence ; see that you do not arm them against you , that they do not reproach you ; this was Paul's daily care and study ; his constant Employment and Exercise , to keep his Conscience void of offence , Acts 24.16 . he would by no means offend his Conscience , nor give it any cause of chiding and being angry with him . It is also highly our Interest so to carry as that God may not blame us at the last ; that he may not reproach us when we come to appear in open Court before Angels , Men , and Devils , and to be Tryed for our Lives , and Sentence as to our Eternal State ; that God may not say , You called your selves my Children , but you were a company of disobedient Children ; you were a dishonour to me , and now before all I do disown you , you are none of mine , I know you not . Oh! do you please God now , and obey him now , and honour him now , that he may not blame you at the last , 1 Pet. 3.14 . Be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace , without spot , and blameless ; this doth require and deserve all the diligence you can use . But that which I would press upon you now is an unblameable walking before Men ; that you may be able to look any Man in the face , and being righteous , be as bold as a Lion ; and do so in your Families ; behave your selves wisely by walking within your houses with a perfect heart , and in a perfect way . Some when they go abroad put on a Cloak of Morality , and Religion , but when they come home again they put it off ; they look like Saints , good Men , sweet temper'd Men in other folks , in other Mens houses , but they are Tygers or Devils in their own . Be you every where what you should be , in the fear of God all the day , and in all places , good every where , best at home . Let Godliness be no Underling , but Commander in chief , ordering and ruling both your words and actions . See that your selves be not guilty of Lying , Swearing , Cursing , Gaming , Drunkenness , Uncleanness , neither let any filthy Communication proceed out of your mouths , for it is infectious , tending to the debauching of others , and the corrupting of good manners . The holy Scriptures , which are the best , and most exact Rule of Faith and Manners , do very much insist upon this , and loudly call for it ; 2 Tim. 2.19 . Let every one that nameth the Name of Christ depart from Iniquity . Whatever he did before while he was an Atheist , an Heathen , though he loved Iniquity , and liv'd in it , though he drew Iniquity with Cords of Vanity , and Sin as with Cart-ropes , yet now that he is a Christian , he must turn over another Leaf , if he would prove himself a Man in Christ , he must lead a new Life , and be a new Creature ; he must now be divorced from Iniquity , and depart from it , from all Iniquity , from all sorts of Iniquity , and that as far as ever he can , saying of his Iniquity , what Ephraim said of his Idols , What have I to do any more with them ? Hos. 14.8 . His very naming the Name of Christ , professing Faith in that Name , and calling himself by it , doth strictly oblige him thereunto . Again , this blessed Scripture ( which is as Gold tryed seven times in the Fire ) doth require you to have the same Mind in you that was in Christ Iesus , and to work out your Salvation with fear and trembling , and also to be blameless and harmless , the Sons of God , without rebuke in the midst of a crooked and perverse Generation among whom ye live , and to hold forth the Word of Life ; Phil. 2.15 , 16. Though your Lines are cast in a debauched place , though you live among a company of profligate Wretches , yet do not you learn their Manners ; they will not be the better for you , be not you the worse for them ; keep you your selves pure , though you live in a dirty World that lieth in wickedness , be you as spotless as is possible , imitating Noah , of whom this admirable account is given , that when the wickedness of Man was great upon the Earth , which was filled with violence , and all flesh had corrupted their way ; Gen. 6.5 , 12. yet he was a just Man , and perfect in his Generation , and walked with God ; Gen. 6.9 . Indeed even he miscarried afterward ; for there is not a just Man upon Earth that liveth and sinneth not , but hitherto he pleased God , and set you an excellent Copy , write after him . This , my dear Friends , is the least that all Men have to expect from you who call your selves Christians , and make a Profession of Godliness , therefore , I beseech you not to fail herein ; be sure to do this , be ye blameless . Secondly ; Be you always grave and serious . Keep not only clear of Sin , but also of Vanity , which will abate your esteem , and render you less valuable . Really , I have not seldom thought it more than enough to offend and turn the Stomachs of sober and wise persons , to see the foolish tricks and Antick gestures of some whose Age and Stature did speak them Men. That is evidently true which Elihu said , Great Men are not always wise , neither do the aged understand Iudgment ; Iob 32.9 . There may be , and too often is want of Brains in an hoary Head. Paul saith , when he was a Child , he did as a Child , and spake as a Child : Neither was it a thing to be blamed or wondred at ; what else was to be expected from him ? Though sometimes excellent Wisdom appears in Young ones , as in Timothy , who knew the Scriptures of a Child . And Ambrose saith of Agnes , Corpore juvencula , animo cana fuit ; she had a youthful Body , and an aged Mind . Young Samuel had in Grace out-striped old Eli : But , saith Paul , When I came to be a Man , I put away childish things : And it is greatly to be wished , that all would do the same , and not be Children all their days . That when they write Man , they would act like Men , bidding an everlasting farewel to childish Tricks , and childish Discourses , childish Pleasures , childish Actions and Carriages . Yea and if there be any such things as manly follies , have nothing to do with them . How do any think to train and bring up their Young ones to the Wisdom , and Discretion , and holy Prudence of Men , when they themselves are playing the Children before them . Therefore , as I said before , be you grave and serious ; let Wisdom breath in all your discourses ; speak much the Language of Heaven ; let it be stampt upon all your actions ; for one act of folly will detract more from your Reputation , than twenty prudent ones will be able to repair and make up again ; let it shew it self in all your Converses ; be so familiar as to know your place ; so let out your Love to Man , as still to keep up your Fear of God ; so converse with Friends here , as not to interrupt your Communion with your heavenly Father ; be so courteous , as still to be Religious ; so sociable , as to keep within those bounds which God hath set you . I would not be understood as speaking one word , no not a syllable against cheerfulness , a sober and well regulated Mirth ; for it is not only allowed by God , which is enough to prove its lawfulness , but also commanded , which renders it a Duty ; Eat thy Bread with a merry Heart , rejoice with the Wife of thy Youth , yea , and of thy Age too ; and Paul doubles the Precept , Rejoice evermore , and again I say rejoice ; and the Psalmist tells us , Praise is comely for the upright ; not Complaints , but Songs ; not always Prayer , but Praise ; the Garment of Praise is the Beautiful Garment which sits most neatly upon a Saints Back , and with this they shall be Invested when taken up to Glory , and admitted into the Joy of their Lord ; and this I desire them to consider who please themselves in a dejected , melancholick Temper , and think they never look well , and as becomes them , unless it be when they have a Cloud upon their Countenances , and Tears trickling down their Cheeks , and if ever they would speak properly , it must be in sighs . I wonder who told them so , it must be no other than the Devil , who is an inveterate and implacable Enemy as to their Holiness , so to their Peace and Comfort . Sure I am , that alacrity and cheerfulness is your Friend , and promotes the Health of your Bodies , and furthers the lively , vigorous motions of your Souls in their most noble Employments ; it is Health to your Navels , and Marrow to your Bones , and Oil to your Wheels . And this is also sure , that chearfulness doth become you ; it is most becoming because most proper for you most suitable to that God who is your Father , to that Jesus who is your Head and Husband , to that Covenant upon which you have laid hold , to those Promises in which you are interested , to those Hopes under which you are planted , and to that safe , sweet , blessed state into which you by Grace are brought ; and that it doth become you is evident from hence , because it doth belong to you . Light is sown for the righteous , and joy for the upright in heart ; and it is fit you should reap that which Heavens Hand hath sown for you . There are no Persons in the World that have such a Right and Title to Joy as Believers have ; wicked Men indeed have none at all , no , though they be Rich , yet are commanded to weep and howl for the Miseries that shall come upon them , Iames 5.1 . For a Temporal Heaven , they shall have an Eternal Hell. And further it is sure , that chearfulness is one way to commend Religion to others : The World is mistaken about it , and hath taken up a wrong notion of it , which it holds fast , viz. that it is a dull , heavy , mopish , and melancholick thing ; that it is morose and ill-natur'd , an Enemy to Manners and Mirth ; but that is a false notion , a grand mistake ; it doth not forbid chearfulness , but directs and orders it , it teacheth Men to be merry and wise ; and I do heartily wish all that chearfulness were quite banished which is inconsistent with the Rules and Principles of our Religion . The World would be far better without it ; what need is there of that Laughter which Solomon call'd Madness , or what good comes of it ; away with all that Iesting which the Scripture calls vain . It is a sad thing for Men to live Iesting , and after that go to Hell in Earnest ; you will find it best to be Merry and Religious . R●s severa est verum gaudium ; true joy is a severe , grave , and serious thing , and let that measure your days ; let there be lightsomness , but nothing of lightness ; solidity , but no froth ; let your Families be witnesses of your Integrity , and see nothing in your Conversation that is below understanding Men , nothing unworthy of gracious Christians . But this is not enough . Thirdly ; Let your Carriages be holy . Our Saviour said to his Hearers , what do ye more than others ? Mat. 5.47 . You that have received more than others must do more than others ; you that have been made partakers of Grace must out do , and out go , and out-shine those that have no more than Nature ; it is not enough for you that you do nothing contrary to the Divine Precepts , that you do not point-blank run cross to the Rule of the Gospel . Negative Religion will never commend you to God , nor carry you to Heaven ; you must conform to those Precepts , and walk up to that Rule , so shall you have Peace , and find Mercy . I have hoped for thy Salvation , and done thy Commandments ; not legally , but Evangelically , Psal. 119.166 . Yea , he that hath the Commandments of God in his Heart may have Salvation in his Eye . He that leads a Life of obedience may live a Life of Hope ; and so godliliness richly pays for the pains it calls for ; therefore I say unto you walk in print , so walk as to set Copies for others to write after , so that you may say to them , Walk so as you have us for an Example . You do very well know how ready young ones are to produce you for their warrant , and they think your Example is sufficient authority , and should signifie as much as an 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 did formerly in the Schools , which stopt the Mouth of Contradiction , no Argument to the contrary was to be admitted ; so here , young ones think the day is their own when they can say , I heard my Father or my Master speak such a word , or I saw him do such a thing ; and from thence they strongly conclude , that without all peradventure they may speak and do the same ; where as poor Creatures they are greatly mistaken , that is a very sorry Plea , a weak , pitiful Argument that cannot justifie them , nor will it satisfie God ; if the thing done be amiss , your doing it will not bear them out when the matter comes to be tryed before the Judgment-Seat of Christ ; nay , your Example alone is so far from being sufficient to justifie them , that your command will not do it . I do indeed know it hath been said , If Superiors command what is unlawful , Inferiors are bound to obey them ; and in such a case , Though the Superiors shall be damned for their command , yet the Inferiors shall be saved for their Obedience ; but it is a Cursed Opinion ; we are bound to obey God rather than all the Men in the World ; their Examples are not for us to follow , nor doth their commands oblige us to active Obedience , when they run cross to the Law of God : and the Wrath of God hath broken out , and will still break out against Persons and People for such their Obedience , Hos. 5.11 , 12. Ephraim is oppressed and broken in judgment , because he willingly walked after the Commandment , therefore will I be unto Ephraim as a Moth , and to the House of Judah as Rottenness . Wherefore I advise and beseech you that ye would be holy , that so ye may be exemplary ; be you sure to keep the way of God , that they may safely tread in your steps ; do you follow Christ that ye may with boldness call upon them to be followers of you . I cannot but again mention that resolution of David , and desire you to remember it , and make it your fixed resolve too ; Psal. 101.2 . I will behave my self wisely in a perfect way , I will walk within my House with a perfect Heart ; do you the same ? Behave your selves graciously , that is , behaving your selves wisely , walk in the Scripture-way , for that is the perfect way ; then you may humbly invite God to come unto you , and comfortably hope that he will. Do this , I say , in your House , in your Families , and before your Domesticks , where , and with whom , you do most frequently and intimately converse ; and in order to the more firm fastening of this Resolution , and your better putting it in practice , I advise you often to call to mind that excellent Question propounded by the Apostle Peter in his second Epistle , Chap. 3. ver . 11. Seeing all these things shall be dissolved , all what things ? All those things that he had spoken of in the former part of that Chapter , all these things that are within your sight ; your Families shall be dissolved , your nearest and dearest Relations , Civil , Conjugal , Natural , shall be dissolved ; the Union between your Souls and Bodies shall be dissolved , those two old dear Friends must part , the whole Frame and Fabrick of Nature must be dissolved , The Heavens , i. e. these visible Heavens , shall pass away with a great noise , and the Elements shall melt with fervent heat , for the Lord Jesus will be revealed from Heaven in flaming Fire ; the Earth also and the works therein shall be burnt up ; what Works ? Gods Works , and Mens Works ; well , what then ? One Question I would ask you , and have you to ask your selves , that is this , What are you ? Are you fire proof ? Are you Gold ? Can you endure the Burning ? Can you dwell with devouring Fire , and not be devoured by it ? Another Question is , What should you be ? Take it in the same Apostles words , What manner of Persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness ? not of the ordinary make and common size of Professors , See that you be Saints of the first rate ; let your godliness be of the highest pitch , and most lovely complexion . See that you be excellent and eminent for your Holiness , that every step of your way be no other than a walking with God , that every one of your actions be right and regular , and that your whole Conversation , all the windings and turnings of your Lives be plain and evident demonstrations of your holiness and godliness . Fourthly ; Be humble and meek in your Deportments . As you are commanded to put on Christ , that lie may be visible in your Tempers and Lives , and others may love Christum habitantem in vobis , Christ dwelling in you ; so you are commanded to be cloathed with Humility . This should be the upper Garment , and through this your Graces , and Gifts , all your Excellencies and Accomplishments will shine with the greater and more taking Beauty . I must and do most readily grant there is a distance between the Rulers and the Ruled , between Parents and Children , Masters and Servants , Mistresses and Maids ; Nature it self teacheth it , and God himself hath order'd it ; and Superiors should know their places , and be known in them ; it is fit , it becomes them , yea , it is their duty , and they ought not to part with any of that honour , and power , and authority , with which God hath invested them , so to do would be sin . And on the other side , Inferiours are to understand themselves , and to know their places , and to keep their distance . There is an honour owing from Children to Parents , and they ought most chearfully to pay it . There is a fear , a reverence , an awe due from Servants to their Masters and Mistresses , and they are bound with all readiness to give it , they sin if they do it not ; they must not think to be ( as the Proverb hath it ) hail Fellows well met ; the Sacred Scripture knoweth no such thing , the Great and Holy God doth not allow it ; see how his Will in this matter is revealed in his Word , Eph. 6.1 , 2. Children obey your Parents in the Lord , for this is right ; honour thy Father and Mother that it may be well with thee , and thou maist live long upon the earth ; ver . 5. Servants , be obedient to them that are your Masters according to the flesh , with fear and trembling , in singleness of your heart , as unto Christ. The like you may read in Col. 3.20 , 21 , 22. And again , 1 Tim. 6.1 . Let as many Servants as are under the yoke , count their own Masters worthy of all honour , that the Name of God , and his Doctrine be not blasphemed . God is not the God of Confusion , but of Order , and it is his Will that Order should be maintained and kept up in Churches , and Nations , and Families . Yet notwithstanding all this , it is the duty and very becoming of Superiours as to be low in their own Eyes , so to be humble in their Behaviour toward those below them , and to condescend to those who are of low degree . Christ Iesus was Master , though he took upon him the form of a Servant , he was Lord of all , yea , the Lord of Glory , yet he was meek and lowly ; and it was his Will that all his Disciples should of him learn to be so , Mat. 11.29 . The highest Heaven is not so much above the Earth as the great and glorious God is above Angels and Men ; there is an infinite distance between him and us , yet how low doth he stoop , how wonderfully doth he condescend to his poor Creatures , to Worms , to Dust and Ashes , to whom he looks , with whom he dwells , whom he gives leave to lay hold upon his strength , to wrestle with him , to come with boldness to his throne of Grace , to whom he saith , Ask me of things to come concerning my Sons , and concerning the work of my hands command ye me ! Isa. 45.11 . Mind these things , and be astonished that so great a Majesty should so greatly bow to such pitiful shreds of Being ; Psal. 8.4 . What is man that thou art mindful of him , or the Son of Man that thou visitest him ? Now certainly since the great God , and our Saviour , do thus stoop and humble themselves , we cannot but conclude , that Pride becomes no body , but it is the shame and disgrace of all that are guilty of it ; and generally those Persons are highest in Pride who are lowest in Worth ; Pride and Frowardness turn Men and Women into Monsters , yea , into a kind of ugly Devils , for as such they appear in the Eyes of those that have to do with them , yea , let their other accomplishments be never so great , yet this one thing spoils all . Such a Man is an Understanding Man , a Learned Man , a Wise Man , an Active Man , a very Useful Man ; this is an high Encomium , but he is a Self-conceited Man , a Proud , Lofty Man , it is a great blot in his Escutcheon , Men do not like him , and God will resist him ; whereas Humility is an Ornament wheresoever it is found , but it sets them off most who are highest . God delights to see such a Man , he will dwell with him that is of a contrite and humble Spirit , Isa. 57.15 . And that is an evident sign he likes and loves them well , and as he will dwell with him , so will be good and liberal to them , he will revive his spirit , and give him grace , Jam. 4.6 . He hath a special favour for them , he will smile lovingly upon them , he will give forth plentifully of his Spirit unto them , they shall have fresh influences , and blessed assistances , grace for grace . Thus an humble Spirit renders you pleasing to God , in and through Jesus Christ , and a kind , affable , courteous behaviour will commend you to Men , to all those with whom you Converse . But while I am commending humility to Family Governours , I would not have them to do any thing unworthy of that place in which God hath set them . Stoop , but not basely , not below your place , shew your selves humble and kind , but do not make your selves mean , and cheap . Remember you are Parents , and Master and Mistress , and carry as such , and let not Inferiours forget themselves , nor turn kindness into wantonness and neglect ; there are due bounds and limits unto which they may go , and beyond which they cannot pass without being Transgressors . It is not fit that Servants should be all tongue in the presence of their Master , or their Mistress , or boldly mingle them selves with their Discourses ; yet they may be permitted to speak before them , so that they open their mouths with wisdom , in a due season , and in a right manner . It is not fit that Servants should usurp Authority , or take into their own hands the reins of Government , as if they had a right to dictate and give order ; no , no , their business is to do the work , and not to cut it out ; yet they may sometimes , and in some cases modestly shew their Opinion . Servants are to be obedient to their Masters , pleasing them well in all things , not answering again ; not quarelling and murmuring against their Orders or Corrections , not thwarting and contradicting them , and thereby provoking their anger and indignation against them ; yet when they are spoken to , they must not be sullenly silent , but give respective answers ; yet when they have received wrong , and are unjustly charged , they may seasonably with due submission , and soft words ( which turn away wrath ) assert their own innocency , and clear themselves of that blame which was laid upon them . An instance hereof we have in David , 1 Sam. 24.8 , 9 , 10 , 11. When Saul looked behind him , David stooped with his face to the earth , and bowed himself ; and David said to Saul , wherefore hearest thou mens words , saying , behold , David seeketh thy hurt ? Behold , this day thine eyes have seen how that the Lord had delivered thee to day into my hand in the Cave , and some bid me kill thee , but mine eye spared thee : and I said , I will not put forth my hand against my Lord , for he is the Lords Anointed . Moreover , my Father , see , yea see the skirt of thy Robe in my hand ; for in that I cut off the skirt of thy Robe , and killed thee not , know thou and see , that there is neither evil nor transgression in mine hand , and I hav● not sinned against thee ; thus he did , and so Servants may humbly clear and vindicate themselves when innocent . And Saul himself , as bad as he was , did hearken to him , and owned his integrity ; saying , thou art more righteous than I , for thou hast rewarded me good , whereas I have rewarded thee evil . Before I pass on and leave this particular , I shall propound to your consideration the practice of Iob , who was a Mirrour of Patience , and a Non-such for Piety . He tells us , it was far from him to despise the cause of his Man-Servant , or his Maid Servant , when they contended with him . If I had done so , saith he , what shall I do when God riseth up , and what shall I answer when he visiteth ? Iob 31.13 , 14. We must needs speak something to that word contended ; when they contended with me . May Servants contend with their Masters and Mistresses ? they do often , too too often contend among themselves , one with another , more shame for them ; but would Iob allow them to contend with himself ? if he did , indeed we may admire his Patience , but have no reason to commend his Prudence . What therefore are we to understand by this their contending ? let Holy and Reverend Mr. Caryl answer the question , which he doth , in these Particulars . First , We are not to understand this , of a bold and saucy contending , doubtless Iob was a Wiser Man than to endure such unmannerly Servants in his House ; such sacucie carriage deserves and calls for sower returns ; nor Secondly , Are we to understand hereby contention in a way of gainsaying , thwarting him in his Orders , and contradicting his Commands ; a Master who knows his place , will not bear with that , he is not to have them for his Controulers , nor Thirdly , are we to understand it of any unreasonable murmuring and dislike upon every trivial and frivolous occasion ; these things , saith he , are not to be permitted in any well-govern'd Family , such as Iob was . If Servants will thus contend with their Masters , they have , saith he , not only reason to despise and dislike them , but unless they amend , to rid their hands of them , and put them out of their Houses . Therefore we have cause to conclude Iobs meaning was this . Fourthly , When any Servant had matter of complaint as to any Household grievance , he gave them free liberty to acquaint him with it ; they needed not be afraid to present their case to him , whom they should find to be their Patron , as well as their Master , and as ready to do them right , as to expect service from them , as the same Author saith . Sometimes Servants complain that their Reward or Wages is too little , sometimes that their Work is too much , and lieth too hard or heavy upon them . When Iobs Servants contended with him about those , or any such matters , he did not bid them hold their tongue , or get them gone , much less did he say as Pharaoh did , there shall be more work laid upon you , that you may labour therein , but he heard them patiently , and gave them redress , if their Complaints were just , which many Masters would not do ; or else he convinced them by his Wisdom , and the weight of his Arguments , that their Complaints were causeless , and unreasonable , which most Masters could not do . He was always willing and ready to rectifie whatever was amiss , and to remove every thing that was really a grievance ; go ye and do likewise . It is past dispute , that Masters and Mistresses have a place above their Servants ; God himself hath by the all-disposing hand of his wise Providence , set them upon the upper ground , and they have a power over their Servants , so long as they continue such ; but yet they are not to abuse them , nor trample them under their feet ; no , no , you ought to be humble , meek , and lowly , though never so great , so high , and rich . The Sun is a glorious Creature , and much above the Earth , yet how comfortable is it to the things therein , how kind and benign its Beams and Influences ? be you so in your Places , not only righteous to them , but courteous , not Labans , not Nabals . To this end , frequently remember and consider , that as you are Persons in Authority , so you are under Authority , you your selves have a Master too ; you are above your Servants , but there is a God in Heaven who is infinitely more above you , and hath Persons , Times , and Things , in his own hand , and at his own dispose , and doth make frequent turns and changes in the World , and it is his delight to abase the Proud. If any of you will pride it in the place of Masters , and Mistresses , God can easily , and he quickly may bring you down into the place , rank and condition of poor Servants , and such an alteration will be very uneasie to you , unless God brings your Spirits down to your Condition , it will be very uneasie ; a strait Shooe drawn upon a big foot , pincheth it , and puts it to pain . Fifthly , Be loving and Kind in all your Carriages . Love like Varnish puts a beauty and gloss upon all things , and like Sugar or Honey a sweetness into them , it is a most glorious representation of God to us , the Scripture saith , he is Love. It was an excellent Chariot which King Solomon made for himself , Cant. 3.9 , 10. of the Wood of Lebanon , there was sweetness , the Pillars thereof were Silver , and the bottom was Gold , and the covering of it of purple , there was Richness , and Princely State , but what follows sets off and commends all the rest ; the middest of it was paved with Love for the Daughters of Ierusalem . Yes , had there been no love there , one might as well have rode in a Cart , as in Solomons Chariot . Love goeth with the Holy Soul to Heaven , and there it is perfected , and there it eternally abides , and is the Heaven of Heaven , it is the brightness of its glory , and the sweetness of all its delights . Faith and Hope are two excellent Graces , and of singular use here , but they will both cease ; Faith being swallowed up of Vision , and Hope most gladly resigning its place to Fruition , but Love remains . Heaven would not be Heaven without Love ; call that place Hell where Love is not , that House Hell where Love dwells not . You that are Husbands , and Wives be loving and kind to one another , in your looks and in your lips let there be the law of kindness ▪ that will strengthen your interest in your Family , and power over it , as well as sweeten your own life , and Relations ; whereas your quarrels and contentions do and will render you mean , cheap and contemptible in the eyes of your Inferiours . Some may think it great to ride Master , and to have their will , but they lose much more in their honour than that comes to . Therefore if at any time there happen a disagreement between you , keep it close and private between your selves , not suffering it to take air ; if there be a spark of discontent kindled ▪ put it out with all speed , and let it not break forth into a flame . Be also kind and loving to your Servants , and to your Children ; when you give out your Orders to them , do not do it in an imperious way ; some think it becomes them to speak altogether in thunder , but let them remember , that it pleased the great God to speak to his Servant Elijah in a still voice . To command with Love , is the most likely way to be obeyed with delight , and cheerfulness . When you Teach and Instruct them , do it with gentleness ; the moderate Rain doth more sweetly soak into the Earth , and refresh the Fruit of it , than Thunder-Showers , which falling with violence , lay the Corn , and the Grass , and damnifie both ; it is better to instill into them knowledge and good Principles , than to knock and beat them in . Love doth most sweetly unlock and open the ear , and makes a free and easie passage for Instructions , and Councels to enter in , and it doth mollifie and soften the heart , so that it is rendred more ready to receive impressions , more faithful and careful to retain them . When you do reprove them , as reprove them you must when they do deserve it , silence in such a case is sinful . He that suffers Sin to rest upon his Child or Servant , brings guilt upon himself , and becomes a partaker with him in his evil deeds . He that doth not reprove for Sin , encourageth in it , and for not reproving , shall be reproved . But whensoever you do reprove , let it be done in Love. Adam had disobeyed God in eating the forbidden Fruit , God did not wink at it , resolved to punish him for it , and did , yet he came to him in the cool of the day . Always dip the Nail in Oyl , for that is the way to make it drive best , and pierce deepest , otherwise the Board may split , or the Nail bow and break , through a stubborn resistance . When you are angry with them , moderate your passion , and mingle it , do not stir up all your wrath , but in the midst thereof remember Mercy ; even then let them see that you love them , and that though their sinful Practices be odious to you , yet their Persons are dear , and all the fruit you aim at , is the taking away their Sin , and that you design your hottest anger for nothing else but a refining fire , to separate their dross from them , that afterwards they may come out like Gold. When you chide them , be sure it is not without a cause , nor more than it doth deserve . He is no Wise Man , that for the roasting of an Egg , makes a fire big enough to roast an Ox , all that cost might have been saved , and the thing better done . In such a case a holy warmth is necessary , and highly desirable ; but let not your tongue be set on fire with the fire of Hell , no , no , let Grace be poured into your lips , and out of them too ; mix your severest Chidings with convincing Discourses , gracious Counsels , and perswasive Arguments ; and while you would drive them from Sin , at the same time draw them to Vertue , and Godliness . When you Correct them , do it in Wisdom ; if Rods will do , make no use of Scorpions ; yea , and let Love lay on the Rod , remembring God , who contends in measure ; let them see clearly that your chastning of them is not for your pleasure , but their own profit , that they might be reduced from the errour of their way , and made partakers of Gods holiness , and when you Correct , pray for them . It is Gods Ordinance , therefore beg a blessing of him upon his own Ordinance , that through him it may prosper , to the destruction of the corrupt Flesh , and so the Spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Iesus , 1 Cor. 5.5 . This is the ready way to gain them a most proper course , to render all the means you use effectual upon them , then will they look upon your very smitings as a kindness , and upon your reproofs as an excellent Oyl , that will not break their heads . This is the way to make your Counsels theirs , and to make them yet more your own , by gaining their hearts . As kindness makes subjection most easie to the inferiour , and most pleasant ; the Yoak will not gaul if it be lin'd with Velvet ; so it commands with the greatest power , it draws suaviter , & fortiter , sweetly , and strongly , so that the Soul runs ; it allures and constrains too : and at the same time it makes Government pleasant to the Superiour , plucking Thorns out of the Crown , and instead of them , sticking it with Roses . Whereas an imperious froward Lord or Master doth not only make his Family uneasie , but himself too ; as their Yoak is heavy , so his Seat will be hard , and while he is all for Whip and Spur , it will make both his arm and his heart ake to hold the Bridle . Remember that Gods way is to draw with the Cords of a Man , i. e. with rational Arguments for the convincing of the Judgement , and with loving kindness , in order to a moving upon , and winning of the affections ; be ye followers of him as dear Children . The more there is of love in your hearts and lives , the more there is of God , the more do you express and glorifie him ; and here let me add that which followeth hereupon , or rather most sweetly accompanies it . Sixthly , Be not severe and rigid in your dealings with them , but tender and compassionate . It is said of the Egyptians , that they made the Children of Israel serve with rigour , and they made their lives bitter with hard bondage , in Mortar , and in Brick , and in all manner of service in the Field , all their Service wherein they made them serve was with rigour ; Tyranny , Violence , Fierceness , citra ullam clementiam aut misericordiam , without any clemency , or mercy , Exod. 13.14 . therefore Egypt is called an Iron Furnace , Deut. 4.20 . but Israelites were forbidden to rule over one another after this manner ; If thy Brother be waxen poor , and sold unto thee , thou shalt not compell him to serve as a Bonds Servant , Levit. 25.39 . Thou shalt not rule over him with rigour , but shalt fear thy God , ver . 43. over your Brethren the Children of Israel , ye shall not rule one over another with rigour v. 46. ye shall not rack him with labour , nor with blows , nor with threatnings ; ye Masters forbear threatnings , Ephesians 6.9 . not altogether , sometimes they may be necessary , but do not use them always , nor often . Well then , God would have you not rigorous and oppressive , but tender ; be so then , as to instance in some particulars . In their Sickness , let them have what you can afford , and their case doth require ; give them convenient Lodging , due Attendance , with all that is necessary both for Food , and Physick , that so they may see their Lives are valued by you , and precious to you , and that it is your will they should not want any thing that is fit for them . How did the good Centurion regard his sick Servant ? Luke 7.2 , 3. His Servant who was dear unto him was sick , and when he heard of Iesus , he sent unto him the Elders of the Iews , beseeching him that he would come and heal his Servant . By taking care of them under their Distempers , you will gain their hearts yet more , and engage them to take the greater care of your business when their health shall be restored them . In their Work do not over-task them , do not call them to that which you know they have not skill to do , nor lay upon them such heavy burthens as are above their strength to bear , though such Task-Masters have been found among Egyptians , let there be none such among professed Christians . It is more becoming the Servants of Pharaoh , who is called a Dragon-Leviathan , than the followers of Iesus who is the Lamb of God , a Lyon indeed for strength in his defending of them , but a Lamb for meekness in his dealings with them ; when he invites Men and Women to take his Yoak upon them , he tells them it is easie , and his burthen is light ; and whether it be so or no , ask one of his Servants who did draw in it , and was able to speak from his own experience , and he hath past his word for it , and left it upon Record , that his Commands are not grievious . And in their failings be ye merciful to them ; if you are only concerned , bear as much as is fit , but if God be concerned too , make them know your deep resentment ; but withall , do what you can to restore them with a Spirit of meekness , trample not upon them when down , but lend them your hand toward the raising them up again to Repentance . And by it , I would not have you ( as I said before ) wink at Sin , either in your Children , or in your Servants ; for who knows how great a matter a little fire kindles ? how many Unclean Spirits may follow one that was admitted and found entertainment before ? Besides , to bear with Sin in them , is the way to provoke the anger of God against your selves , because you do not punish Sin in them , God will punish that neglect in you . Yet even in that case , you ought to act with prudence , and Christian moderation , and let the offending Parties find , that while your wrath burns against their sin , your bowels yearn over them . As when God threatned Adam and Eve for their Disobedience , yet he threw out to them a plank after the Ship-wreck , and before he turned them out of Paradise , he opened to them a door of hope in that early and most gracious Promise , the Seed of the Woman shall break the Serpents head . And for the promoting of this tenderness in you , consider your own obnoxiousness to God , they have their miscarriages , and you are not without , but do offend in many things ; you did so when you were young as they are , and to this day you are not faultless , but if the Lord should be strict to mark iniquities , you would never be able to abide it , and therefore have need to go down upon your knees every day , and humbly sue out your pardon ; and it is a plain case , such as stand in need of a Pardon themselves should be very free to give it out to others : and upon those terms only it is to be expected , our Saviour having told us , that if we forgive not men their trespasses , neither will our Heavenly Father forgive us our trespasses . 6. Mat. 15. That King was justly severe with his cruel Servant , who owed him Ten thousand Talents , and upon his intreaty had that vast debt forgiven him ; but meeting with his fellow Servant who owed him no more than Five hundred Pence , laid hold on him , took him by the Throat and cast him into Prison ; whereupon his Lord was wrath and delivered him to the Tormentors , till he should pay all that was due . So , saith Christ shall my Heave●ly Father do also unto you , if ye from your heart forgive not every one his brother their trespasses . Matthew 18 23. So that your Lives , your Pardon , your Salvation depend upon this : if you will shew no mercy , you are not like to find any , that measure which you meet to others shall be meeted out to you again ; neither is this forgiveness to be past to a Brother only , but to an Enemy , to a Servant , upon profession of Repentance , and the promise of amendment . How Pathetically did the Apostle Paul plead with Philemon for his forgiving of Onesimus , and receiving him again into his favour and Family , who had before been an unfaithful Servant , but was at that time a Penitent and Convert . Eightly and Lastly , In the measuring out of your love and kindness , make no difference but where the merit and desert of Persons did make one first ; This is the way to encourage virtue , without discouraging any one . Indeed it is too common and ordinary a fault , and too frequently visible in Families for Parents to be partial , unequal , yea and unjust in the distribution of their favours , when by-standers are not able to give any ; no not the least shadow nor colour of Reason for it ▪ One Child , and possibly that too none of the best shall be the Darling , and have all the countenance and respect , and all the attendance , and abundance of good things given it , when the others are slighted and neglected as if they were not their own , or not worthy to be owned ; though they have cost the Mothers much sickness in breeding them , and as much pain in bringing them forth ; and as much care and trouble in their rearing of them up , yet after all they are looked upon as the refuse and off-scouring of the Family ; and whereas they have a right to the priviledges of Children , they are debased to the condition of Servants , if not of Slaves . This I my self have been a mournful spectator of , feeling in me the workings of those p●ssions of grief and displeasure which such a matter might well raise ; and as for those Parents which are herein guilty , I desire them seriously to consider these few things which I shall but briefly touch upon . First , What a great discouragement this is to th●se poor neglected Children . Hereby you damp their Spirits , and take off their edge ; possibly they are dull and heavy already , and you take a course to make them more so ; if they be naturally quick and lively , they are the more apprehensive and sensible of your unkindness , and that causeth the greater dejection . Secondly , You create in them a grudge against him who is your fondling . And lay the foundation of a present and future , if not a perpetual breach , and he or she who is the object of your unequal love , may for that very reason be the sole object of their envy and rage . I suppose you know how Ioseph's dreams did incense his Brethren against him , and how do you know but your dreaming or rather doating folly , may have as diresul an effect of one kind or another ? Thirdly , You do provoke those Children to be less respective and dutiful to you . Truly Parents , if they be wise , will so carry as to get their Childrens love ; for as they depend upon you now , so you may when they are grown up stand in need of them ; though now they are but little ones , yet remember they may come to be Men and Women , and be great supports and comforts to you when you can do little for your selves , and it is not your bringing of them forth , not their meer having a being from you that will endear you to them ; in case there be afterward an apparent defect in your love , you will find their memories are tenacious . I heartily wish , this may never be your case , but there is too much reason to fear it , and if it should come to pass , you will see cause to repent , but alas ! then it will be too late , the matter is past cure . Fourthly , This partial and unequal affection of Parents may provoke against them the Divine displeasure . Yea , and make them to feel the smarting effects thereof . God may write his anger in such plain and leigible Characters that they may run and read their sin in the punishment . As in another case , when God saw that Iacob loved Rachel , but not Leah , or Rachel more than Leah , he opened the Womb of Leah , and gave her Power to Concieve and bring forth , but shut up Rachels ▪ Womb and struck her with Barreness , 29. Genesis 31. and I will appeal to you , have not some of you known Parents herein chargeable ; the Father or Mother have set their Hearts too much upon one Child , and their Affections have run with a strong and violent stream in that Channel ; and it hath issued in lamentation and woe , one of these two things have followed thereupon . Either , First , God hath taken away that Child from them . They hugg'd it to death , as the Ape doth her young ones . Ionah was exceeding glad because of the gou●d that shadowed his head , and in some measure helped and relieved him against the vehement scorching heat of the Sun ; here joyced with great joy , he was overjoyed , and what followed ? God prepared a Worm , when the Morning rose the next day , and it smote the gourd that it withered . 4. Ionah 6 , 7. He joyed too much , and his enjoyment was short ; over-loving a Child is over laying it . It is as killing it with kindness . Or Secondly , If that Child hath been continued to them it hath been in wrath . They have the life of it , but they want the comfort of it ; for it hath proved naught and vicious , and so been a Thorn in their side , an Heart-break to them . They had better while it was Young have followed it to the Grave , than see it now notoriously wicked , an Enemy to God and all goodness , disobedient to them , and galloping to Hell with full speed , as if it thought it could not get thither soon enough . Therefore upon all these accounts the advice which I give unto Parents is this ; observe the spirits and carriages of your Children , and also of your Servants , which of them do most fear God , and respect you ; which of them are most tractable and diligent , and let them have most love and respect who do deserve it best ; bestow your greatest cost upon that Soil which makes the best returns , by this means they will have no just cause of quarreling you . By this you will prevent envy , discontent and breaches among them ; and also promote Piety and Goodness in your Families , by stirring up in them all an excellent , sweet and Friendly Emulation . So that there shall be a striving together without wrath and bitterness , how they may excel in Godliness and Virtue , and in all those things which you require of them , and which will render them acceptable and pleasant unto you ; this will sweeten and commend obedience to them , it will encrease and add to their endeavours , it will be as a Golden Spur to quicken their pace in the way that they should go . Now for a Coronis or conclusion of this my Discourse , upon this great , and ( specially at this day ) necessary Subject of Family Duties , I shall add some Miscellany Counsels , and make a kind of Medley , inviting whoever will to come and take , and apply those of them to themselves , which they shall judge most proper and pertinent to their case ; and the God of Heaven bless them to them . First , Look diligently , lest any fail or fall short of the grace of God , 12 Hebrews 15. You see there it is the Apostle's Advice , it will be your wisdom to take and follow it ; see that the Spirit of Christ dwell in you , else you are none of his ; and that you have been made partakers of his renewing sanctifying Influences : without the Spirit of God you will never be fit for the Work of God : Without Christ's breathing upon his Apostles , and their receiving from him the Holy Ghost , they could never have done the work of an Apostle ; so without Christs breathing upon you , and your receiving his Spirit , you will never rightly perform the work of a Christian. ; where there is not the Spirit of Grace , there is not the Spirit of Supplication . Nor will a person void of the Spirit and Grace be welcom to God , nor his Service pleasing . Such an one indeed may peform the External Duties of Reliligion , and set up the Worship of God in his Family , and it is no more than what he owes to God , and to himself , and to his House , yet that which he doth will not be accepted ; if the man be bad , what he doth cannot be good , but is quite spoil'd by his doing it : The Sacrifice of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord : Though the Sacrifice for the matter of it be rich and costly , yet God's soul loaths and abhors , it because a wicked man brings it ; The Lord had respect unto Abel , and to his offering , 4 Gen. 4. first to the person , and then to the thing . Besides , unless you have the Spirit and Grace , you will not be constant in Duty , a small matter shall take you off , and stop you in your course ; the question is , Will the hypocrite pray always , will he always call upon God ? The Answer is easy and ready ; no , he will not , and the Reason is plain , because there is not a spring to feed the stream , not an inward principle to keep on the motion : God complain'd of old , That the people drew nigh unto him with their lips , but their hearts were far from him : Mark , though there were appearances before God , yet their hearts and God did never meet together in the Duty , and therefore the day will most certainly come when there will be a parting between such people and their duties , they never cordially and throughly agreed with God himself , never came to a full closure with his terms , never lov'd him for his holiness , nor rejoyced at the remembrance of it , and therefore for something or other they will fall out with his Works and Ways . Consider my dearly beloved , and again consider what the Scripture saith . It is a good thing that the Heart be establisht with Grace , Heb. 13.9 . both with the Doctrine of Grace , and with an internal Principle of Grace , for the one will not do without the other , nothing short of Grace can strengthen , stablish and settle the Heart , till Grace be infused into the Soul , and becomes a new nature in it , till it comes to be commander in chief , the Heart of man will be fluttering and unstable , off and on playing fast and loose with God , it will look toward the holy Temple , and take some steps in the Way of God , and that with seeming life and vigour , as much zeal for the Lord of Hosts as Iehu pretended to have , but being only a preternatural heat , it cools again , and the man jades and tires . But when once Grace comes in truth and with Power it fixeth the Soul , and as when the Rulers of the People and Elders of Israel commanded the Apostles not to speak at all , nor teach in the name of Iesus . Peter and Iohn answered them thus , we cannot but speak the things which we have seen and heard , Acts 4.20 . so when there is an holy frame wrought in any , they cannot but wait upon God , converse and walk with God , they cannot but Read and Hear and Pray : they cannot live a spiritual life without these spiritual breathings more than another life without natural breathing , an holy fear will powerfully drive them to their duty , a filial love will sweetly draw them to it , and Faith will mightily encourage them in it , while they do really and firmly believe that God is , and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him ; they cannot but be a seeking People , while they do believe that let them be stedfast and immoveable , and never so much abounding in the Work of the Lord , their labour shall not be in vain in the Lord , they cannot but be an industrious and diligent People : and while they do believe that in the keeping of Gods Commandments there is great reward , besides all that which shall be hereafter , they will delight themselves greatly in them , and it will be their meat and drink to do them , and yet more when besides this Faith in God , they themselves have tasted that God is gracious , and had experience of that advantage which comes in by religious duties . I Love the Lord , said David , because he hath heard my Voice . He hath experience of Gods goodness and a love to him , because he hath inclined his ear unto me , therefore will I call upon him as long as I live , Psal. 116.1 , 2. His mercy to me hath drawn out my love to him , and my love shall influence my obedience . I love him , and I will cleave to him and follow after him . Secondly , While you are young covet after those gifts which may in some good measure accomplish you for the filling up of your duties and places , and the performance of every duty . It is an excellent thing for Christians to be well furnished , and youth is a golden season for that purpose , as for those , who are not studious while they are in the morning of their age , there is too much ground of fear , that they will continue Fools to their latter end . It is indeed too apparent , that some , yea , too many who have good natural parts , and attained to some Knowledge and Learning , are thereupon wretchedly self-conceited , and puft up , knowing neither themselves , nor any body else ; their pride testifieth against them to their very faces , and this is their folly , and their shame ; they have no reason to swell , for they are empty , and the opinion they have taken up of themselves , is far above their abilities ; when a Wise Man comes to fathom them , he finds they are very shallow , and their real intrinsick worth doth fall extreamly below that price , which they set upon themselves . On the other side , there are many that pretend to nothing , and indeed there is nothing which they may pretend to , being altogether ignorant , weak , and poor , their upper room is wholly destitute and unfurnished , they are not able to discourse of God , and the things of God ; they cannot pray , but want both matter and words , whereas they should be rich , and increased in goods , they are blind and wretched , and poor , and miserable ; and whereas they should be thoroughly furnished for every good work , they are furnished for none at all : And from whence doth this proceed , but from their own gross neglect ? they have not meditated as they should , nor read the Scriptures , nor heard Sermons as they should ; they did not labour to stock and store themselves while they are young , and so they come to be poor and beggarly when they are old ; they squandred away their Golden Age , and now they are come to their Silver hairs , their heads and hearts are little worth . I do therefore now direct my Discourse to you young ones of both Sexes , and would have you better to befriend your selves , and as you do now learn your Trades , and your Books , and to manage Household business , and labour to get betimes a good insight into your several Callings , and so to understand them , as that you may be able afterward to set them up , and carry them on with Credit , and to advantage ; go away and do the like as to Religion , and the things of God. Begin betimes to mind those things which do most deserve your minding , now acquaint your selves with God , look into your own hearts , and States , and study them well , get the knowledge of your Sins and Wants , when you read or hear , or are in company with good Men , see that it turn to account , and you get something by it , make something your own ; be continually laying up , though it be but by little at at a time , yet it may come to something . The Evangelical Prophet hath this expression , Isa. 42.23 . Who among you will give ear to this , who will hearken and hear for the time to come ? Truly that is excellent Husbandry , very good for Men to be before hand ; will you study this really ? it is your best way , it is your interest . I would advise you to nothing , but what doth one way or another make for your own interest ; this doth so ; to read for the time to come , and to hear for the time to come ; and to this end consider what you do in other cases : you will labour to get Money and Land for the time to come ; and some of you to stock your selves with Cloaths and Linnen for the time to come : and give me if you can , a Reason why you should not be as desirous to get Knowledge , and Gifts , and Grace for the time to come ? are not these things as good as the other ? are they not better ? O! do it then , I beseech you do it : be not Wise for your Bodies , and Fools for your Souls ; Wise for time , and Fools for Eternity . See that you do things now in your single capacity , while you have the greatest leisure , and briskness of Parts ; that so when you come to be Married , and have Families to order and govern , you may be Workmen that need not be ashamed , and able to do all your Work and Duty : And have a treasury out of which you may bring forth good things new and old , for the inriching of others ; whom it should be your desire , and will be your comfort to see thriving under you . A Christian rich in gifts and grace , is most like to do good . Thirdly , Study well how things stand with your selves and with them that are yours . Though I might also add with the Nation and Church of God , which are the Body of which you are Members , the Ship , in which you have so great a venture ; and since you have a concernment in them , you ought to be daily and earnest supplicants for them . If I forget thee , O Ierusalem , let my right hand forget her cunning , if I do not remember thee , let my Tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth , if I prefer not Ierusalem above my chief Ioy. 137. Psalm 5 , 6. But that which I advise you at present is a care within doors ; see how matters stand with your Heart and with your House . Be thou diligent to know the state of thy stocks , and look well to thy herds . 27. Proverbs 23. And if such diligence should be used , such knowledge to be got of Flocks , and Herds , then Men should study and labour to understand their own state , and the state of their yoak fellows , and Children , and Servants , be strict observers of them , and frequent in your inquiries concerning them , and all that are under your charge , and see how matters have been with you , and them , and how they are , what are the providences of the day , and the dispensations of God toward you , and them . This will supply you with matter of Prayer , yea , probably with variety of matter , and he that hath good store of matter , is most like to find good store of words to express it . Though a full Vessel may for a time want vent , yet when a little is given , it runs apace at the tap . This you may gather from those passages of Elihu , Iob 23.18 , 19.20 . I am full of matter , the Spirit within me constraineth me ; behold my Belly is as Wine which hath not vent , it is ready to burst like new Bottles ; and what now ? there was no need of any squeezing him to get a drop out ; no need of pouring some water in , in order to the pumping more out ; no , he was resolved to ease himself . I will speak that I may be refreshed , I will open my Lips , and answer . The informing and rectifying of others , the correcting of their errours and mistakes , was an ease , delight and refreshing to Elihu himself . Yea , and as this is the way to supply you with matter for Prayer , so to furnish you with suitable affections also ; without which , Praying is no better than trifling , a losing of time , and a mocking of God. When your hearts are dead and dull , this considering of things is the way to excite and quicken them in the Duty , Psal. 39.4 . My heart was hot within me , while I was musing the fire burned , than spake I with my Tongue . I shall give you two or three instances ; when you consider your own personal sins , or those which have been committed by any of your Family , it will help you in Confession , which is a special part of Prayer , and a giving Glory to God ; and very much conduce to the humbling , softning and melting of your Hearts , and then you will appear before the Throne of Grace as becomes you , and cannot carry with you a more acceptable and welcome present . Psal. 51.17 . The Sacrifices of God are a broken Spirit , a broken and a contrite heart , O God , thou wilt not despise . When you ponder upon your own and your Families wants , necessities , burdens and afflictions , it will draw forth desires and longings ; hungrings and thristings , and God fills the hungry with good things , it will raise an Holy fervor and heat , and as in Manoahs , so in the flame of thy Sacrifices the Father of Mercies , the Angel of the Covenant may do wonderfully . And when you are considering of the mercy and goodness to you , and commended by such and such circumstances , it may tune both Heart and Tongue to a Song of praise ; and not only afford you just matter of thankfulness , but also raise up your Souls to a God-blessing , God-admiring , and God-exalting frame , and while you are much in Offering praise ; you may comfortably hope , and expect that God will more and more shew you his Salvation , and compass you about with his favour as a Shield , and so sweeten your lives to you with farther instances of his care , and evidences of his Love , as shall further and raise your after comfort and joy . Many are spoil'd , ruin'd , and for ever lost through want of consideration . They do not repent because they do not consider , they do not reform nor amend their ways and their doings , because they do not consider ; so in the present case , many cannot pray , because they do not consider . The most thinking Men are , and not without good Reason , look'd upon as the wisest Men. So the most thinking Christian is the best Christian , most fit for the great work of Prayer , and most like to prosper in that or in any thing else , unto which he shall turn his hand . Only do not rest here , nor take up with your own Thoughts and Studies as if they would be sufficient , but let your Eyes ever be to the Everlasting Hills , from which cometh your help , and humbly beg of God the gracious assistance and influence of his blessed Spirit , who is ( as you have heard ) a Spirit of Grace and Supplication ; and whose work it is to help the infirmities of his poor People , without he fill your Sails you will lye Wind-bound , but if he be in you as he was in Elihu , he will both constrain and enable you ; and think with your selves how acceptable you must needs be to God , and how powerful , yea , prevalent your Prayers with him , if you be some of those blessed ones , who have the Spirit of God making intercession in them , and Jesus Christ the Son of God , at his Fathers right hand in Heaven making intercession for them . Fourthly , While you are in the conscientious performance of Family duties ; curiously take notice and observe what comes of all . A wise Man would do nothing in vain , no more would a wise and serious Christian. I run , said Paul , Corinth . 1.10 . Not as uncertainly , so fight I not as one that beateth the Air. He did run as one that hoped to get the price , and he did fight not meerly to exercise himself , or to shew his Strength and Valour , but with a design and in hope to obtain the Victory . Thus it should be with you and all the Children of God , with reference to duty : you have been Praying , but what answer is there , what return ? The Dove hath been sent out is he returned with an Olive-branch . You have let down your bucket into the Well of Salvation , have you drawn Water with joy ? inquire what you your selves are the better for it ? and whether your Families are the better ; do you see less vanity in your young Ones , and more solidity and seriousness than there was before ? What amendment is there , and Reformation of things amiss ? What Conquests and Victories over Passions ? What Patience and contetnment under Crosses , Losses , Afflictions , Provocations ? What more Reverence and Humility in Duties of Worship . More taking up of the Bible and other good Books to Read ? What more attentiveness to wholesom Instructions , and Counsels ? What more dutifulness and respect to you in reward ? What token of Love from above , what increase of goodness below ? It is not good after vows to make enquiry , but to do it after Prayer is very good . It hath been the practice of Holy Men that are recorded in the Word ; when David resolved in the morning to direct his Prayer unto God ; he did at the same resolve to look up : Psalm 5.3 . He look'd to see what would , become of his Prayer , and what God would send in to him after it . When the Prophet Elijah had been Praying for Rain ; He sent his Servant to look toward the Sea seven times , and left not till he saw a little Cloud ; Kings 1.18.44 . and that was to him a token of his speeding . And so again when Habakuk had been mightily wrestling with God in Prayer for Israel , and against the Caldeans , that bitter and hasty Nation , which should march thorough the breadth of the Land , and gather Captives as the Sand. He said in Habukuk 2.2 . I will stand upon my watch , and set me upon my Tower , and will watch to see what he will say unto me . He that Prays much expects much and where there is an hopeful expectation there will be a curious Observation ; if any of you do not look after your Prayers when you have put them to God , it is a sign you did not mind them while you made them . And as I advise you to do thus after Praying , so do the same after your Reading and repeating , and instructing and counselling your Families ; the great God doth thus , when he had been at much cost and charge upon his Vineyard . He looked it should bring forth Grapes , and what Grapes it did bring forth ? Isaiah 5. our Lord Iesus doth so too . Cant. 6.11 . I went down into the garden of nuts , to seek fruits of the valley , and to see whether the vine flourished and the pomegranates budded . And when the laborious Countryman hath Sown his Seed , and committed it to the Earth , he freequently goeth into the Field to see how it comes up , and what crop he is like to have . So when the Merchant hath sent his Commodities to Sea ▪ he longs to hear of their safe arrival at the intended Haven , and then waits for a rich return : and what shall your Prayers and pains be neglected and forgotten as things meerly thrown away ? I grant , they are not worthy God's regarding ; but are they not worthy your own ? Therefore , I say , when you have been taking pains in your Families , and scattering holy truths and counsels there which are as so much precious Seed ; take notice , what place it hath in them , and what power upon them ; whether it passeth away as a tale that is told , or roots and abides , and what good comes of it , what fruit there is like to be . And though you meet with no success as yet , be not weary of well doing ; but go on , duty is yours , success is Gods , who gives it when , where , and as he pleaseth : follow one counsel with another , one instruction with another , one reproof with another , and one prayer with another ; do not sin in ceasing and giving over . Something may come of it at the last . The Husbandman waiteth f●r the precious fruit of the Earth , and hath long patience . Iames 5.7 . He 〈◊〉 not Sow and Reap in a day , the Seed lies a considerable time in the Furrows buried under the clods ; follow then the Wiseman's advise . In the morning Sowe thy Seed , and in the evening withold not thine hand , for thou knowest not whether shall prosper this or that , or whether they both shall be alike good . Eccles 11.6 . Fifthly , When you set upon holy duties ( particularly , that of prayer ) see that you be well composed , and enjoy a calmness of Soul ; we are required to lift up holy hands , as in faith , without doubting ▪ so in love without wrath . I have known and heard of some that would go chiding and scolding to their Prayer , in a chafe and fret ; but are they like to be welcome ? Sure , it would be more adviseable to stay till they were cooler . God did in a most tremendous manner destroy Nadab , and Abihu for Offering Incense with strange fire ; what then must thou expect , who Offerest thine with Hell-fire ? The same Persons will fall into a scolding fit again as soon as the Prayer is over ; what think you , doth this speak Grace in their Hearts ? did they pray their Hearts into Heaven ? had they any communion with God , sure if they had , they would have risen off their knees more like to him . When Moses had been in the Mount with God Forty days , at his coming down his face shone ; there was a Light , Beauty , and Glory upon his Countenance he did not look , speak , nor act like a fury ; besides ▪ how can such an 〈◊〉 think , that others should get good by his Prayer● when he himself gets none , or that he should 〈◊〉 any one of this Family into Godliness , when he doth no● pray himself into quietness ? Thou O Man , being under such a distemper , wouldest not go to thy King , how then darest thou go to thy God ? If thou beest touchy and froward at , in , and after thy Prayer , God is not like to be pleased : Psal 18.26 . With the froward He will shew himself froward . Sixthly , Do not chuse to live in those Families , where there is not the Worship of God , nor Religious exercises , if thou art only a Lodger in such an house , deal with the Master , and in a Friendly manner put him upon it , if he will not be persuaded , thou hast cleared thine own Soul , that Family is none of thy charge , therefore that neglect shall not be charg'd upon thee , only be thou careful to pray by thy self and with thy Family if thou hast one , yea and with his too if he either desires it or will permit it , but why dost thou chuse to lodge there ? couldst thou find no other place to pitch thy Tent in ? If thou canst , why dost not go to it ? Suppose there be where thou now art more outward conveniencies , consider God is not there , and it cannot be good living where God is not : for the pleasantness of the place Lot had a mind to dwell in Sodom , but had not God been more merciful to him , he had been consumed in the Flames of that vile City . It was a dismal time with the Egyptians ●●en in every one of their Houses there was one dead , and must it not of neccessity be very uncomfortable to thee , if alive unto God , to live in a Family where they are all dead ? How did David bemoan himself while in the House of Saul , though a Family unto which he was related , yet because wicked he reckon'd it his unhappiness to be there ? Psalm 120.5 . Wo is me that I sojourn in Mesech , that I dwell in the Tents of Kedar . Seventhly , Take none into your Family but those who will keep you company while walking with God. Carnal respect sway with many , after which much mischief follows and the repentance of an whole Life . Accept not of him for thy Husband who cannot or will not live with thee as a man of Knowledge , a Child of God. How shall He help thee on in thy journey to Heaven , who will not himself walk in the way that leads thither . Neither , do thou , O man if fearing God , take her for thy Wife , who will not draw with thee in the Yoke of Christ , but rather despise thee in her Heart , or mock and flout at thee when serving and honouring of the Lord. Some indeed , good natur'd men do take such in hope of gaining them afterward , but for certain they run a desperate venture , let the Portion be never so great , thou hadst better be without it , than fasten a Clog to thy Heel , or take a Viper into thy Bosom : let Birds of a Feather get together , what have Birds of Paradise to do with Vultures and Owls ? Favour is deceitful and beauty is vain , but a Woman that fears the Lord shall be praised and should be chosen . The like for Servants their skill , parts , strength and fitness are to be look'd to , but Godliness is not to be overlook'd . A wicked Servant may be a curse , a moth to the house , whereas a gracious one will be a blessing , a treasure . Lastly , You that are Servants in Prayerless Families , supply that defect if you may have leave , only do it humbly , and double your respects to your Governours , if leave for that be denied , be more in secret Communion with your God , tho' they keep a bad House keep you a good Chamber , and if thou mayest honestly remove , do it , the sooner the better . Let not meer secular advantages keep thee there . It is better being out of the warm Sun than out of Gods blessing . And you that are fixed , as a Wife , Child , an Apprentice , count the want of Family-duty as your Affliction , and groan under it as such , and in your private addresses beg down , if possible , Mercy and Grace upon them . Pray heartily for them who will neither pray for you nor for themselves , the godly Wife for the ungodly Husband , the gracious Child for the profane Parent , and the Religious Servant for the Wicked Master or Mistress , yea , wrestle mightily in Prayer for them , and with Iacob weep as well as make supplication , and be sure to live up to the Laws of the Relations you stand in , filling up your days with the duties of your places , that though they will not practise Godliness , they may see the power of it in its influences upon you . If the Wife be peaceable and quiet , loyal and loving , respecting and reverencing her Husband , the Children very dutiful and obedient , the servants submissive , diligent and faithful , every one walking in the fear of God , giving no cause of quarrelling with you , or blaspheming Religion for your sakes . In a word , let your whole conversation be as it becometh the Gospel of Christ. You see I have spent a great deal of time and taken no small pains in studying , preaching , and writing out all this discourse . Oh! that it may not be in vain , but all the better that have heard or shall read it ; to that end the good Lord accompany it with his Spirit and blessing ▪ bring you to this work , keep you at it , and help you so to manage your selves and families , that after a Life of Prayer on Earth , you may be taken up to a Life of Praise in Heaven where all your Wants shall be supplied , all your Prayers answered , and all your hopes accomplished , then you will see the Word was your best rule , the Ministers of Christ your real Friends , and Religion your grand Interest , when fury shall be poured out upon them that know not God , and Hell shall receive the Families that call not upon his Name , where there shall be no end of their torment and pain , nor of their roaring , cursing , and blaspheming , of that holy , and righteous , but terrible God , whom they would not be persuaded to love , seek and serve . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . A POSTCRIPT . HAVING said so much as I have done in this Book to the graver sort of Persons , your Parents , and Governours , dear young ones , and that not only for their sakes , but yours also . I have judged it fit to accompany that advice and counsel to them , with a few words to you , because you likewise are very nearly and greatly concerned , and all means possible are to be made use of for the preventing your present miscarriage , and eternal ruine . You are now in the Morning of your Age , and prime of your strength , you have set forth and entred upon that Journey which will certainly bring you to your last home , where you must take up your everlasting abode , from whence there can be no remove , and that will be either Heaven , or Hell , the Glorious Mansions above , or the Bottomless Pit below ; where it is absolutely necessary for you to take heed to your ways , and ponder all your goings , to set out right at first , and then to go straight on , without turning either to the right hand , or to the left ; otherwise you will be lost , for if the way be not good , the end cannot be peace ; as for such as turn aside unto their cro●ked Paths , the Lord shall lead them forth with the workers of iniquity , Psal. 125.5 . It is too evident , that multitudes of young ones , through corrupt inclination , and bad conduct , have gone out of the way of life betimes , and could never find it afterward . Having made an early choice of Sin , they grew harden'd in it , and there being a judicial Tradition of them , to the power thereof , they went on to commit it with greediness , living and dying its Votaries and Vassals ; and is it not sad to consider ? may it not well be matter of bitter lamentation , that such Excellent Noble Creatures should be spoiled , such precious immortal Souls should be irrecoverably lost , that such sweet and lovely Blossoms should be utterly blasted ; that they who once were the hope of their Parents , and might have been the Ornaments and Blessings of their Country , should prove burthens and curses to them both . God forbid that any of you should be so too , for we have too many such already . Therefore I pray God that you may , and desire that you would be serious betimes ; get alone , sit down and consider what you are , where you are , whether you are going ? what is for your interest , and what against it ? labour to know , and knowing mind those things which belong unto your peace ▪ youth will not always last , nor the pleasures of it , which you do now count so very sweet and delicious , and run such desperate ventures for the enjoyment of . A Sickness may quickly be sent of God , and cover your faces with a dismal paleness , pick the Marrow out of your Bones , suck all the Milk out of your Breasts , and convert all your strength into weakness , faintness , and tremblings ; your smiles may be turned into frowns , your mirth into mourning , your laughter into heaviness , and your songs into sighs , groans , and shrieks . Your own Consciences may arm against you as your enemy , and God may so appear , as to be your terrour , and you may be then made to possess the iniquities of your youth , when all the honey is spent , and nothing but the sting left , the pleasure is over , and only the guilt remains , whereby you are bound over to the suffering of the judgment written . If you be not wise in this condition , you may live and die , and then you will see cause to wish you had never been born . O! be you , I beseech you , be ye your own friends , provide for your own peace and welfare , and instead of working out your Damnation with joy , jollity , and self-pleasing , chuse to work out your Salvation with fear and trembling , since all the pleasures of Sin are but for a season ; do you seek out for , and make sure of those which are at Gods right hand for evermore ; and since this life will be but short , when drawn out to its greatest length , do you lay hold upon that which is quite out of the reach of death , that life which came from God , and will be perfected in him . And know , how great a number soever the Prodigals and Profligate Youths of the present Age do amount to ; yet if you will be serious , and truly religious , you will not be alone , there have been many choice and excellent Persons that went before you ; the Names of some , together with their Character , you meet with in the Sacred Records , an Isaac who loved Meditation , a Iacob that was set for the blessing , and by a Vow bound himself to have and own the Lord for his God. And Abijah , the Son of Ieroboam , in whom there was found some good thing toward the Lord God of Israel . An Obadiah , that fear'd the Lord from his youth , a Iosiah , whose heart was tender , so that he humbled himself , and wept before the Lord ; a young Iohn that was the Beloved Disciple of our Lord Jesus , and lay in his Bosom , and a Timothy , who knew the Scriptures of a Child : And this Age , as vile as it is , is not altogether barren , but some such are to be found among us , though too few , the Lord knoweth , too too few , if compared with the rest of the World ; do you , dear hearts , add to the number , be you Trees of Righteousness , Plants of Renown . Two things I do earnestly desire for you , viz. that you may be holy now , and happy for ever ; that you may spend your time as you ought , and then have a blessed Eternity ; live to purpose , and die in peace , Husband and lay out this life wisely , and make sure of a better . I wish you the good things of this World , full out so far , and so much as will be good for you , but withal , better things too ; for really , such is my esteem of you , that however the Sons of the Earth rate them , I look not upon them as good enough to make up a Portion for you , they are too little , and low and fading , they perish in the using ; may Iehovah , whose is the Earth and fulness thereof , bestow upon you such a part as will make you serviceable to him , and life comfortable to you , and while you have it , so use and improve it , that when it shall fail you , you may not miss of the delights and glories of Eternity . To this end , I beseech you begin betimes , do not imbezzle and squander gway your choicest Seasons , your golden hours , lay not out the very best you have upon the World , the Flesh , and the Devil , thinking to reserve for God the dregs and refuse ; Oh! how sweet is early Religion ! how beautiful a green head found in the way of Righteousness ! how pleasant to see tender Plants bringing forth Fruit unto God ? Are you descended of good Parents , do not degenerate , let the Faith that was in them be in you also ; like precious Faith are your Lines cast in Religious Families , walk worthy of the mercy , and keep peace with them in the way of God. It is your unhappiness to be in wicked Families , do not learn their ways , partake not with them in their Sins , be not tainted by them , nor worse for them , remembring there were Saints in Nero's House ; and that it is great indeed , truly noble to be good in the midst of bad examples , of many discouragements , and of great opposition ; such I would fain have you to be , and the more such the better . That you may be such , beg of God by Prayer , and consider what I can but hint to you . Study well your own case , the vileness of your hearts , and the miserableness of your State by Nature , whatever you have to commend you unto Men ; there is more than enough to render you odious and abominable unto God. Abhor therefore your selves , bewail your condition , and get out of it as fast as you can , which you can no other way do , but by getting into Christ , who is the only City of Refuge , unto which Sinners may flee for safety , the Rock of Salvation in which they may hide , and upon it build ; who died that he might redeem from Sin and Wrath , and lives to receive and embrace all those that come unto him ; go then to him , and beg of him , that you may be washed with his blood , and sanctified by his Spirit , that he would please to be a Principle of Spiritual Life in you , and the Author of Eternal Salvation to you . Be thankful for restraints , that you are not so bad as others ; but rest not in them , nor in any external performances , or the most lovely form of Godliness , but look after a saving change , that there be in you the root of the matter , an heart sincerely set against sin , and for God. Avoid all loose bad Company , even as you would the Devil , for his Children they are , and the works of the Father they will do , and his designs they will be carrying on in all places where they are . Can a Man touch Pitch , and not be defiled therewith ? or familiarly converse with with wicked Men , or lewd vain Women , and not be in danger of learning their manner ? walk with wise Men , so you may learn wisdom , delight in them that fear the Lord , and associate with those here , with whom you would chuse to be in the other World. Be not strangers to the necessary and excellent duty of Prayer , but delight to make it your business every day ; keep not away from Family-duties , but bless God for them , and be serious and fervent in them , yet think not your selves by them discharged from attendance upon God , and seeking his face in your private retirements ; honour your Parents , and other Governours , and study to please them well in all things in the Lord. Open your ear to Doctrine , and be ready to learn and practice all that is good . Hear the instruction of your Father , and forsake not the Law of your Mother , let them not depart from your eyes , but keep them in the midst of your heart , for they are life unto them that find them , and health unto all their Flesh. In your behaviour be sober , modest , and chast , humble and loving to all you have to do with , faithful to your trust , and diligent in your business , mind your Masters interest as much as if it were your own , God will bless you the better for it : when you are removed from all Spectators , so that no body on earth sees you , remember there is one above that doth , and let that awe and preserve you from sin , for he is of purer eyes than to behold iniquity . Love all vertue and goodness , hate all vice , all filthiness , both of Flesh and Spirit ; govern your selves well , keep your hearts with all diligence , make a Covenant with your eyes , set a watch before the door of your lips , give honour to Superiours , be respective to your equals , courteous to your inferiours , civil and obliging to all ; morose and imperious , froward and quarrelsom with none ; wise and prudent in looking to your Concerns , and managing all your Affairs ; consider every motion that is made to you , before you embrace and close with it ; ponder your actions before you do them , that you may not make more work for Repentance than you need , and weigh your words before you speak them . Moses suffer'd greatly for speaking unadvisedly with his lips ; keep your selves from Sin , as that which tends to your destruction , and avoid vanity and lightness , as that which will issue in your disparagement . Sweet youth , let me perswade and prevail with you to remember your Creator in the days of your youth ; own him as your great Lord , from whom you had your being , upon whom you have your dependance , and unto whom you must be accountable for your time and talents ; and all that you have done in the Body : make God your choice , this is your chusing time , oh ! chuse well , chuse God for your sweetest Companion , walk with him as Noah did , and Enoch , and all the Saints in their several Generations . When you awake be still with him , be continually with him , let your fellowship be with the Father , and with his Son Jesus Christ. Eye God as the most perfect pattern , and study imitation , be ye followers of him as dear Children , holy as he is holy , and live to God as your noblest end , do all to his glory , if you make his glory your end , he will make use of your Salvation as a means thereto , so that both means and end shall be secur'd ; count his fear your treasure ; Hezekiah valued it more than his Royal Exchequer , or his Peoples Purses ; be you in it all the day , fear him now as a Father , that you may not at last tremble before him as a Judge , nor be glad to have Rocks and Mountains fall upon you , and hide you from his face , and wrath . Oh! let Jesus Christ be precious to you , as he is to all them that believe , sell all for that Pearl of Price ; part with your sins , and your own Righteousness , all confidence in the Flesh , yea , and whatsoever you have in the World , rather than go without him ; take him in all his Offices , learn of him as your Prophet , trust in him as your Priest , and submit to him as your King ; follow him in all his ways , and be expressive of him in your own ; shew forth the vertues , the humility , meekness , patience , holiness , heavenly mindedness of him who hath called you unto his Kingdom , and Glory . Ask of God that Holy Spirit , which is a Spirit of Love and Power , and a sound mind , that he may convince you of Sin , and Righteousness , and Judgment , lead you into all truth , help your infirmities , strengthen you with all might in the inner-Man , quicken and inlarge you , revive and comfort you , sealing you up to the day of Redemption , and beware of resisting , quenching , or grieving him . Acquaint your selves well with the Scriptures , read them every day , study them , meditate in them , pray for the opening of your eyes , that you may see the wondrous things of the Law , and the precious things of the Gospel ; make them your delight , and your Counsellors , receiveing no Doctrine as true but what they own , nor any practice as good , which they do not allow ; eye them as the rule of Faith , and Manners , hide them in your heads and hearts , that you may not sin against God ; know the truth , love , and live in it . Get Consciences rightly inform'd , and consult them , and be ready to hear them , do not cross them , but make it your daily exercise to keep them void of offence both toward God , and toward Man ; remembring that Conscience is Gods Deputy , which curiously observes , and carefully records thoughts , words , and actions ; is more than a thousand Witnesses , will be a sweet Comforter , or dreadful Tormentor . In short , set God always before you , live by faith upon him , in obedience to him , and communion with him , frequently and seriously think of Death , Judgment , Heaven , and Hell. So carry , that you may not be a curse to the World , nor a grief to your Friends while you live , nor a terrour to your selves when you come to die . My hearts desire and Prayer for you is , that God would doth bless you , and make you blessings . FINIS . 
A68107	----	Of domesticall duties eight treatises. I. An exposition of that part of Scripture out of which domesticall duties are raised. ... VIII. Duties of masters. By William Gouge. Gouge, William, 1578-1653. 1622 Approx. 1995 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 358 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2005-12 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A68107 STC 12119 ESTC S103290 99839047 99839047 3442 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A68107) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 3442) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 801:07, 1204:12) Of domesticall duties eight treatises. I. An exposition of that part of Scripture out of which domesticall duties are raised. ... VIII. Duties of masters. By William Gouge. Gouge, William, 1578-1653. [24], 191, 196-693, [3] p. Printed by Iohn Haviland for William Bladen, and are to be sold at the signe of the Bible neere the great north doore of Pauls, London : 1622. An expansion of the sermon on Ephesians in his "An exposition of the whole fifth chapter of S. Johns Gospell". The last leaf is blank. Leaves N8-O2 are cancelled by one leaf signed O on recto and O2 on verso. Variant: cancelled leaves N8-O2 present, with continuous pagination. The affected text is in section 12. Identified as STC 12119a on UMI microfilm reel 801. 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Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Family -- Religious life. Households -- Early works to 1800. 2005-05 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2005-05 Apex CoVantage Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2005-06 Andrew Kuster Sampled and proofread 2005-06 Andrew Kuster Text and markup reviewed and edited 2005-10 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion OF DOMESTICALL DVTIES Eight Treatises . I. An Exposition of that part of Scripture out of which Domesticall Duties are raised . II. 1. A right Coniunction of Man and Wife . 2. Common-mutuall Duties betwixt Man and Wife . III. Particular Duties of Wiues . IV. Particular Duties of Husbands . V. Duties of Children . VI. Duties of Parents . VII . Duties of Seruants . VIII . Duties of Masters . By WILLIAM GOVGE . LONDON , Printed by Iohn Haviland for William Bladen , and are to be sold at the signe of the Bible neere the great North doore of Pauls . 1622. TO THE RIGHT HONOVRABLE , RIGHT VVorshipfull , and other my beloued Parishioners , Inhabitants of the Precinct of Black-friers LONDON , such sufficiencie of Grace as may bring them to fulnesse of Glory . IF noble Birth , high Honour , great Estate , true Piety , bountifull Charity , good Esteeme of Gods word and Ministers , and in particular , intire loue of the Author , be inducements to choose a Patron for his worke , I , for my part , need not goe farre for a Patron . In mine owne parish are all these . To you therefore ( right Honourable , right Worshipfull , and other my beloued Parishioners , most worthy of all due respect ) doe I dedicate these my poore paines about Domesticall Duties . To testifie the equall dutie which I owe , and the impartiall respect which I beare to you all , I make you all as one Patron . You were the first ouer whom I euer had any ministeriall charge . To this charge by your free choice was I called . Among you haue I spent * almost two full prentiships . You haue alwaies so accepted my paines , and respected my person , as I neuer had any cause to repent my acceptance of this place , and calling : but rather to thanke God for the same . My desire is ( if so it may seeme good to the diuine prouidence ) to spend all my daies among you : and , while I am among you , to helpe forward your spirituall edification . This is the maine end of my calling , and the marke , which , as in the ordinary course of my Ministry , so in the publishing of these Eight Treatises of Domesticall Duties , and dedicating them to you , I haue aimed at . As in testimony of Loue and Dutie I haue preached in your hearing , and published in your name these Duties , so doe you manifest your kinde acceptance of my former , and latter paines , by a conscionable obseruing of them , so farre forth as they are agreeable to Gods word : that all who know you , may know by that euident demonstration , how well you haue relished and approued them . Thus shall you gaine much profit , and my selfe much comfort by my paines . Oh if the head and seuerall members of a family would be perswaded euery of them to be conscionable in performing their owne particular duties , what a sweet society , and happy harmony would there be in houses ? What excellent seminaries would families be to Church and Common-wealth ? Necessary it is that good order be first set in families : for as they were before other polities , so they are somewhat the more necessary : and good members of a family are like to make good members of Church and common-wealth . The subiect matter therefore of these Treatises is worth the handling , if I were able according to the worth thereof to handle it . I haue endeuoured to doe what I could therein , though I haue not attained to what I would . Be you like vnto God , who , if there be first a willing mind , accepteth according to that a man hath , and not according to that he hath not . Though for such a matter as is handled in these Treatises , the worke may seeme at first sight to be too copious , yet I hope the obseruant Reader will not finde it too tedious . It is the variety of many , not the prolixity of few points which hath made this booke to swell to that bignesse which it hath . The first Treatise ( which is a fourth part of the booke ) containeth a Commentary on that part of Scripture out of which Domesticall Duties are raised : wherein the Apostle setting forth Christ and the Church as patternes to husbands and wiues , liuely declareth the great loue of Christ to his Church , and the neere vnion betwixt them , together with other deepe mysteries , the vnfolding whereof hath a little the longer detained me . But as I haue a while insisted on maine matters of much moment , so haue I very briefly passed ouer other points . The other Treatises , wherein the Duties themselues are handled , are euery of them much shorter then the first . In them I haue barely propounded and briefly proued the truth and equity of the seuerall duties , except some choice points which are of especiall vse , or at least through disuse much questioned : and them I haue more largely handled . And because contraries laid together doe much set forth each other in their liuely colours , I haue to euery duty annexed the contrary fault , and aberration from it . For many that heare the duties thinke all well enough , till they heare also the contrary vices , whereby in their consciences they are most conuinced . Concerning the many faults and vices of bad Husbands , Wiues , Parents , Children , Masters and Seruants , taxed in these Treatises , let me intreat you , not to apply them too generally to all Husbands , Wiues , Parents , Children , Masters and Seruants . Hath not wise Solomon much taxed the lightnesse , shrewishnesse , pride , flattery , and other vices of women ? And shall sober , meeke , humble , honest women thinke themselues taxed thereby ? By like reason might vnchaste strumpets , vntrusty gossips , vnquiet shrewes , and proud dames thinke themselues commended by those excellent commendations which be giueth of good women . Let euery one , as their conscience ( an impartiall Iudge ) shall beare them witnesse , make a right application of euery thing to themselues . Thus shall we Ministers be freed from many euill surmizes . I remember that when these Domesticall Duties were first vttered out of the pulpit , much exception was taken against the application of a wiues subiection to the restraining of her from disposing the common goods of the family without , or against her husbands consent . But surely they that made those exceptions did not well thinke of the Cautions and Lamitations which were then deliuered , and are now againe expresly noted : which are , that the foresaid restraint be not extended to the a proper goods of a wife , no nor ouerstrictly to such b goods as are set apart for the vse of the family , nor to c extraordinary cases , nor alwaies to an d expresse consent , nor to the e consent of such husbands as are impotent , or farre and long absent . If any other warrantable caution shall be shewed me , I will be as willing to admit it , as any of these . Now that my meaning may not still be peruerted , I pray you , in reading the restraint of wiues power in disposing the goods of the family , euer beare in minde those Cautions . Other exceptions were made against some other particular duties of wiues . For many that can patiently enough heare their duties declared in generall termes , cannot endure to heare those generals exemplified in their particular branches . This commeth too neere to the quicke , and pierceth too deepe . But ( to interpret all , according to the rule of loue , in the better part ) I take the maine reason of the many exceptions which were taken , to be this , that wiues duties ( according to the Apostles method ) being in the first place handled , there was taught ( as must haue beene taught , except the truth should haue beene betrayed ) what a wife , in the vttermost extent of that subiection vnder which God hath put her , is bound vnto , in case her husband will stand vpon the vttermost of his authority : which was so taken , as if I had taught that an husband might , and ought to exact the vttermost , and that a wife was bound in that vttermost extent to doe all that was deliuered as dutie , whether her husband exact it or no. But when I came to deliuer husbands duties , f I shewed , that he ought not to exact whatsoeuer his wife was bound vnto ( in case it were exacted by him ) but that he ought to make her a ioynt Gouernour of the family with himselfe , and referre the ordering of many things to her discretion , and with all honourable and kinde respect to carrie himselfe towards her . In a word , I so set downe an husbands duties , as if he be wise and conscionable in obseruing them , his wife can haue no iust cause to complaine of her subiection . That which maketh a wiues yoake heauy and hard , is an husbands abuse of his authority : and more pressing his wiues dutie , then performing his owne : which is directly contrary to the g Apostles rule . This iust Apologie I haue beene forced to make , that I might not euer be iudged ( as some haue censured me ) * an hater of women . Now that in all those places where a wiues yoke may seeme most to pinch , I might giue some ease , I haue to euery head of wiues duties made a reference , in the margin ouer against it , to the duties of husbands answerable thereunto , and noted the reference with this marke * , that it might the more readily be turned vnto . Yea I haue further parallel'd , and laid euen one against another in one view , the heads of husbands and wiues duties , as they answer each other : and in like manner the contrary aberrations : with a reference made vnto the particular sections where they are handled : that so on the one side it may appeare , that if both of them be conscionable and carefull to performe their owne duty , the matrimoniall yoke will so equally lie on both their necks , as the wife will be no more pinched therewith then the husband , but that it will be like Christs spirituall yoke , light and easie : and that on the other side it may be manifest that there is commonly as much failing by husbands in their duties , as by wiues in theirs . This parallel and euen-setting out of each of their duties , and of the contrary aberrations , I haue annexed next to this epistle . And further I haue added thereto a table of the seuerall heads of those points that are handled in the eight following Treatises , that by this helpe you may the more readily finde out such particular points as you desire most especially to read . To shew that the duties prescribed to Husbands , Wiues , Parents , Children , Masters , and Seruants , are such as in conscience they are bound vnto , I haue endeuoured to shew how they are grounded on the word of God , and gathered from thence . To auoid prolixity , I haue referred most of the quotations to the margin . If your leisure will serue you , you may doe well to search them out . Two things haue beene especiall helpes to me for finding out the many duties noted in these Treatises , & vices contrary thereunto : Obseruation and Disposition . Obseruation both of such duties as the Scripture commendeth and contrary vices as it condemneth : and also of such commendable virtues as I well liked in those Husbands , Wiues , Parents , Children , Masters , and Seruants , that I came among , and such vnseemely vices as I disliked in them : and Disposition of one point after another in the best order that I could . My method and manner of proceeding brought many things to my minde , which otherwise might haue slipped by . For by method sundry and seuerall points appertaining to one matter are drawne forth , as in a chaine one linke draweth vp another . There is no better way to finde out many obseruations in a text , then by a methodicall resolution thereof . As method is an helpe to Inuention , so also to retention . It is as the thread or wier whereon pearles are put , which keepeth them from scattering . And if a man by abundance of matter be cast into a labyrinth , by the helpe of method he may easily and readily finde out the way againe . In which respects method is fitly stiled the Mother of the Minde , and Mistresse of Memorie . If you well marke the order and dependance of points one vpon another , you will finde as great an helpe in conceiuing and remembring them , as I did in inuenting and disposing them . Because there is not one word to comprise vnder it both masters and mistresses , as fathers and mothers are comprised vnder Parents , and sonnes and daughters vnder Children , I haue according to the Scripture phrase comprised Mistresses vnder Masters : so as the duties enioyned to them belong to these , so farre as may stand with their sex . To conclude , in recompence of all my paines I heartily pray you all to pray heartily for him who daily praieth for you , euen The Watch-man of your soules , WILLIAM GOVGE . A few faults escaped in the printing are noted in the end of the booke , which I desire you to amend with a pen. TREAT . III.   Particular duties of Wiues .   SVbiection , the generall head of all wiues duties , § . 2.   1 Acknowledgment of an husbands superioritie , § . 3. 2 A due esteeme of her owne husband to be the best for her , and worthy of honour on her part , § . 5. 3 An inward wiue-like feare , § . 7. 4 An outward reuerend cariage towards her husband , which consisteth in a wiue-like sobrietie , mildnesse , curtesie , and modestie in apparell , § . 9 , 10 , 11 , 12. 5 Reuerend speech to , and of her husband , § . 13 , 14 , 15 , 16. 6 Obedience , § . 17. 7 Forbearing to doe without or against her husbands consent , such things as he hath power to order , as , to dispose and order the common goods of the familie , and the allowance for it , or children , seruants , cattell , guests , iournies , &c. § . 18 , 23 , 38 , 39 , 40 , 41. 8 A ready yeelding to what her husband would haue done . This is manifested by her willingnesse to dwell where he will , to come when he calls , and to doe what he requireth , § . 43 , 44 , 45 , 46. 9 A patient bearing of any reproofe , and a ready redressing of that for which she is iustly reproued , § . 47 , 48. 10 Contentment with her husbands present estate , § . 49. 11 Such a subiection as may stand with her subiection to Christ , § . 51. 12 Such a subiection as the Church yeeldeth to Christ , which is sincere , pure , cheerefull , constant , for conscience sake , § . 54 , 55 , &c. TREAT . IV.   Particular duties of Husbands .   WJsdome and Loue , the generall heads of all husbands duties , § . 2 , 4.   1 Acknowledgment of a wiues neere coniunction , and fellowship with her husband , § . 6. 2 A good esteeme of his owne wise to be the best for him , and worthy of loue on his part , § . 9. 3 An inward intire affection , § . 11. 4 An outward amiable cariage towards his wife , which consisteth in an husband-like grauitie , mildnesse , courteous acceptance of her curtesie , and allowing her to weare fit apparell , § . 4 , 15 , 22 , 40 , 49. 5 Milde and louing speech to and of his wife , § . 24 25 , 26 , &c. 6 A wise maintaining his authoritie , and forbearing to exact all that is in his power , § . 4 , 18. 7 A ready yeelding to his wiues request , and giuing a generall consent and libertie vnto her to order the affaires of the house , children , seruants , &c. And a free allowing her something to bestow as she seeth occasion , § . 18 , 54. 8 A forbearing to exact more then his wife is willing to doe , or to force her to dwell where it is not meet , or to enioyne her to doe things vnmeet in themselues , or against her minde , § . 18 , 26. 9 A wise ordering of reproofe : not vsing it without iust and weighty cause , and then priuatly , and meekly , § . 35 , 38. 10 A prouident care for his wife , according to his abilitie , § . 46 , 49 , 50 , 52. 11 A forbearing to exact any thing which stands not with a good conscience , § . 26. 12 Such a loue , as Christ beareth to the Church , and man to himselfe , which is first free , in deed , and truth , pure , chaste , constant , § . 61 , &c. and 74. TREAT . III.   Aberrations of Wiues from their particular duties .   AMbition , the generall ground of the aberrations of wiues , § . 2.   1 A conceit that wiues are their husbands equals , § . 4. 2 A conceit that she could better subiect her selfe to any other man then to her owne husband , § . 6. 3 An inward despising of her husband , § . 8. 4 Vnreuerend behauiour towards her husband , manifested by lightnesse , fullennesse , scornfulnes , and vanitie in her attire , § . 9 , 10 , 11 , 12. 5 Vnreuerend speech to and of her husband , § . 13 , 14 , 15 , 16. 6 A stout standing on her owne will , § . 17. 7 A peremptorie vndertaking to doe things as she list without and against her husbands consent . This is manifested by priuie purloyning his goods , taking allowance , ordering children , seruants , and cattell , feasting strangers , making iourneyes , and vowes , as her selfe listeth , § . 42. 8 An obstinate standing vpon her owne will , making her husband dwell where she will , and refusing to goe when he calls , or to doe any thing vpon his command , § . 44 , 45 , 46 , 67. 9 Disdaine at reproofe ; giuing word for word ; and waxing worse for being reproued , § . 47 , 48. 10 Discontent at her husbands estate , § . 50. 11 Such a pleasing of her husband as offendeth Christ , § . 53. 12 Such a subiection as is most vnlike to the Churches , viz. fained , forced , fickle , &c. § . 56 , &c. TREAT . IV.   Aberrations of Husbands from their particular duties .   WAnt of wisdome and loue , the generall ground of the aberrations of husbands , § . 3 , 5.   1 Too meane account of wiues , § . 8. 2 A preposterous conceit of his owne wife to be the worst of all : and that he could loue any but her , § . 10. 3 A Stoicall disposition , without all heat of affection , § . 12. 4 An vnbeseeming cariage towards his wife , manifested by his basenesse , tyrannicall vsage of her , loftinesse , harshnesse , and niggardlinesse , § . 5 , 15 , 17 , 41 , 44 , 53. 5 Harsh , proud , and bitter speeches , to and of his wife , § . 24 , 25 , 30 , 32 , 36 , 39. 6 Losing of his authoritie , § . 5. 7 Too much strictnesse ouer his wife . This is manifested by restraining her from doing any thing without particular and expresse consent , taking too strict account of her , and allowing her no more then is needfull for her owne priuate vse , § . 19 , 55. 8 Too lordly a standing vpon the highest step of his authoritie : being too frequent , insolent , and peremptorie in commanding things friuolous , vnmeet , and against his wiues minde and conscience , § . 30 , 32. 9 Rashnesse and bitternesse in reprouing : and that too frequently , on sleight occasions , and disgracefully before children , seruants , and strangers , § . 36 , 38 , 39. 10 A carelesse neglect of his wife , and niggardly dealing with her , and that in her weaknesse , § . 46 , 51 , 53 11 A commanding of vnlawfull things , § . 26 , 30 , 32. 12 Such a disposition as is most vnlike to Christs , and to that which a man beareth to himselfe , viz. complementall , impure , for by-respects , vnconstant , &c. § . 62 , &c. and 74. A Table of the seuerall points handled in the eight Treatises of Domesticall Duties . I. TREATISE . An exposition of that part of Scripture out of which domesticall duties are raised . § . 1 OF the Apostles transition from generall duties to particulars . pag. 1 2 Of ioyning seruice to men with praising of God. 2 3 Of euery ones submitting himselfe to another . 4 4 Of the feare of God. 8 5 Of the feare of God mouing vs to doe seruice to men . 11 6 Of limiting all dutie to man within the compasse of the feare of God. 13 7 Of performing the duties of particular callings . 16 8 Of the lawfulnesse of priuate functions in a family . 17 9 Of the Apostles order in laying downe the duties of husbands and wiues in the first place . 20 10 Of the Apostles order in setting downe inferiours duties in the first place . 21 11 Of the reasons why wiues duties are first taught . 25 12 Of wiues subiection . 26 13 Of the persons to whom wiues must be subiect . 27 14 How an husband is his wiues head . 29 15 Of the resemblance of an husband to Christ . 30 16 Of the resemblance betwixt The Church to Christ . 31 A wife to her husband .     17 Of the relation betwixt Christ and the Church . 32 18 Of the benefit of Christs headship . 34 19 Of Christ a sufficient Sauiour . 35 20 Of Christ the only Sauiour . 36 21 Of the Church the body of Christ . 38 22 Of the extent of Christs goodnesse to all his body . 38 23 Of the restraint of the benefit of Christs headship to them only that are of his body . 40 24 Of the Churches subiection to Christ . 41 25 Of the extent of the Churches subiection . 42 26 Of the summe of husbands duties . 43 27 Of the example of Christs loue . 44 28 Of Christs giuing himselfe . 46 29 Of the willingnesse of Christ to die . 47 30 Of the kinde of Christs death , and oblation . 48 31 Of the infinite value of the price of our redemption . 48 32 Of Christs seeking the good of the Church . 50 33 Of the particular ends , why Christ gaue himselfe , and of the condition of the Church before Christ tooke her . 51 34 Of Christs preuenting grace . 54 35 Of Christs seeking to make his Church pure . 55 36 Of the Churches iustification . 55 37 Of the Churches sanctification . 56 38 Of the Churches purity before God and man. 56 39 Of the order and dependance of iustification and sanctification one vpon another . 58 40 Of Sacramentall washing of water . 59 41 How Baptisme is a meanes of cleansing and sanctifying . 60 42 Obiections against the efficacie of Baptisme answered . 61 43 What kinde of meanes of grace baptisme is . 62 44 Of the necessitie of baptisme . 62 45 Of the contrarie extremes of Papists and Ana. baptists , about the necessity and efficacie of baptisme . 63 46 Of the inward washing by baptisme . 65 47 Of ioyning the word with baptisme . 66 48 Of the inference of glorification vpon instification and sanctification . 68 49 Of the fruition of Christs presence in heauen . 70 50 Of the glory of the Church in heauen . 72 51 Of the Churches freedome from all deformity in heauen . 73 52 Of the perfect puritie of the Church in heauen . 74 53 Of the application of the things which Christ hath done for the the Church , vnto husbands . 75 54 Of the application of the loue which a man beareth to himselfe , vnto an husband . 76 55 Of the amplification of a mans loue of himselfe . 78 56 Of mans naturall affection to himselfe . 79 57 Of naturall selfe-loue . 80 58 Of spirituall selfe-loue . 82 59 Of euill self-loue . 82 60 Of the error of Stoicks in condemning all passion . 83 61 Of well vsing naturall affection . 83 62 Of mans forbearing to wrong himselfe . 84 63 Of vnnaturall practises against ones selfe . 85 64 Of haters of others . 86 65 Of mans care in prouiding and vsing things needfull for his body . 87 66 Of them that neglect to cherish their bodies . 88 67 Of contentment in that which is sufficient . 89 68 Of Christs forbearing to hate the Church . 90 69 Of Christs nourishing and cherishing his Church . 91 70 Of the vnion betwixt Christ and the Saints . 93 71 Of the priuiledges appertaining to the Saints euen in this life by reason of their vnion with Christ . 98 72 Of the priuiledge of our vnion with Christ in the time of death . 102 73 Of the priuiledge of our vnion with Christ after death . 103 74 Of the duties which are required of the Saints by vertue of their vnion with Christ . 104 75 Of their regeneration who are members of Christ . 105 76 Of the author of our regeneration , Christ . 106 77 Of the matter of our regeneration , Christ . 108 78 Of the excellency of regeneration . 109 79 Of the ancient law of mariage . 110 80 Of preferring husband or wife before parents . 112 81 Of the firmnesse of the matrimoniall bond 114. 82 Of two only to be ioyned together in mariage . 114 83 Of polygamy and bigamy . 115 84 Of the neere coniunction of man and wife together . 115 85 Of the matrimoniall coniunction of Christ and the Church . 117 86 Of Christs leauing his father and mother for his spouse . 120 87 Of the indissoluble vnion betwixt Christ and the Church . 121 88 Of the equall priuiledge of all the Saints . 122 89 Of the neere vnion betwixt Christ and the Church . 123 90 Of the mysterie of the vnion of Christ and the Church . 124 91 Of the Popes vsurping to be spouse of the Church . 125 92 Of the false sacrament of mariage . 126 93 Of the summe of husbands and wiues duties . 128 94 Of applying the word to our selues . 129 95 Of euery ones looking to his owne duties especially . 130 96 Of the meaning of the first verse of the sixt chapter . 132 97 Of the meaning of the second verse . 134 98 Of aiming at our owne , in seeking the good of others . 137 99 Of preferring honestie before commoditie . 138 100 Of the meaning of the third verse . 139 101 Of prosperity : how far forth it may be a blessing . 140 102 Of prosperity bestowed on the wicked , how it proues a curse . 141 103 How both hauing , and wanting prosperity is a blessing to the Saints . 142 104 Of long-life : how farre forth it is a blessing . 143 105 Of long life prouing a curse to the wicked . 144 106 Of limiting the promises of temporall blessings . 144 107 Of appropriating prosperity and long life to the obedience which children yeeld to their parents . 145 108 Of Gods ordering his fauours so as they may appeare to be true blessings . 147 109 Of Gods high account of dutifull children . 148 110 Of childrens doing good to themselues by honouring their parents . 148 111 Of parents doing good to their children by keeping them vnder obedience . 149 112 Of the perpetuity of the substance of such things as in their circumstances respecting the Iewes are vanished . 150 113 Of the determined period of mans life . 151 114 Of reward promised to obedience , that it implieth no merit . 153 115 Of the connexion of parents dutie with childrens . 153 116 Of the extent of these words , fathers , children . 154 117 Of parents prouoking children . 155 118 Of parents seeking the good of their children . 156 119 Of parents nurturing their children . 157 120 Of parents fixing precepts in their childrens mindes . 158 121 Of adding information to discipline . 158 122 Of parents teaching their children the feare of God. 159 123 Of the subiection which beleeuing seruants owe. 159 124 Of the meaning of the fift verse . 160 125 Of the meaning of the sixt verse . 164 126 Of the meaning of the seuenth verse . 168 127 Of the meaning of the eight verse . 168 128 Of the connexion of masters duties with seruants . 171 129 Of the meaning of this phrase , doe the same things . 172 130 Of masters forbearing threatning . 174 131 Of masters subiection to a greater master . 175 132 Of Gods being in heauen . 175 133 Of Gods hauing no respect of persons . 177 II. TREATISE . PART . I. Of husband and wife who are so to be accounted . § . 1. OF those who may seeke to be maried . 179 2 Of ripenesse of yeares in them that are to be maried . 180 3 Of impotent persons that ought not to seeke after mariage . 181 4 Of barrennesse , that it hindereth not mariage . 182 5 Of that ineuitable danger which hindereth mariage . 183 6 Of the lawfulnesse of mariage to all sorts of persons . 183 7 Of the things which are absolutely necessary to make a person fit for mariage . 185 8 Of the lawfulnesse of other mariages after one of the maried couple is dead . 186 9 Of equality in yeares betwixt husband and wife . 188 10 Of equality in estate and condition betwixt those that are to be maried together . 189 11 Of equality in piety and religion betwixt those that are to be maried together . 191 12 Of mariages betwixt persons of diuers professions . 192 13 Of that mutuall liking which must passe betwixt mariageable persons before they be maried . 196 14 Of a contract what it is . 198 15 Of the grounds of a contract . 198 16 Of the reasons which shew how requisite a contract is . 200 17 Of abusing or neglecting a contract . 202 18 Of the distance of time betwixt a contract and mariage . 202 19 Of a religious consecrating of mariage . 203 20 Of clandestine mariages . 205 21 Of a ciuill celebrating of mariage . 206 22 Of ill or well ordering mariage feasts . 206 23 Of the honour of mariage in regard of the first institution thereof . 208 24 Of the ends of mariage . 209 25 Of the priuiledges of mariage . 210 26 Of the mysterie of mariage . 211 27 Of mariage and single life compared together . 211 28 Of celebrating mariage with sorrow . 212 II. TREATISE . PART . II. Of common mutuall duties betwixt man and wife . § . 1. OF the heads of those common mutuall duties . 213 2 Of matrimoniall vnitie . 214 3 Of desertion . 215 4 Of matrimoniall chastitie . 216 5 Of adultery . 218 6 Of pardoning adultery vpon repentance . 218 7 Of the difference of adulterie in a man and in a wife . 219 8 Of the hainousnesse of adulterie . 219 9 Of remedies against adulterie , and in particular of due beneuolence , and of defect or excesse therein . 221 10 Of mutuall loue betwixt man and wife . 224 11 Of husbands and wiues mutuall hatred contrary to loue . 227 12 Of mutuall peace betwixt man and wife . 228 13 Of contentions betwixt man and wife . 230 14 Of husbands and wiues dwelling together . 230 15 Of the respects for which man and wife may for a time liue asunder . 231 16 Of the error of Papists about man and wiues separation . 232 17 Of husbands and wiues vnlawfull absenting themselues one from another . 234 18 Of husbands and wiues mutuall prayers . 235 19 Of the things for which husbands and wiues are to pray alone . 236 20 Of husbands and wiues hatefull imprecations and wishes one against another . 237 21 Of husbands and wiues neglect of mutuall prayer . 238 22 Of husbands and wiues mutuall care for one anothers saluation . 238 23 Of husbands and wiues care to winne one the other when one of them is not called . 239 24 Of husbands and wiues edifying one another . 240 25 Of husbands and wiues hindering sinne one in another . 240 26 Of husbands and wiues redressing sinne in one another . 242 27 Of husbands and wiues helping forward the growth of grace in each other . 242 28 Of the sinnes of husbands and wiues contrary to a mutuall care of one anothers saluation . 243 29 Of husbands and wiues mutuall care ouer one anothers body . 245 30 Of husbands and wiues backwardnesse to helpe one another in time of neede . 246 31 Of husbands and wiues mutuall respects of one anothers good name . 247 32 Of husbands and wiues preuenting each others discredit . 248 33 Of the wisdome of husbands and wiues in redressing one anothers ill name . 249 34 Of husbands and wiues care in procuring one anothers good name . 249 35 Of husbands and wiues wisdome in preseruing each others good name . 250 36 Of husbands and wiues like affection towards one anothers credit . 250 37 Of the vices contrary to that mutuall care which man and wife should haue of one anothers credit . 251 38 Of husbands and wiues mutuall prouidence about the goods of the family . 253 39 Of the vices contrary to the good prouidence of husbands and wiues about the goods of the family . 255 40 Of husbands and wiues ioynt care in gouerning the family . 256 41 Of the vices contrary to a ioynt care of gouerning the family . 260 42 Of husbands and wiues mutuall helpe in hospitality . 261 43 Of vices contrary to mutuall helpe in hospitality . 263 44 Of husbands and wiues mutuall helpe in releeuing the poore . 264 45 Of husbands and wiues vnmercifulnesse to the poore . 265 III. TREATISE . Of wiues particular Duties . § . 1. OF the generall heads of this treatise . 267 2 Of a wiues subiection in generall . 268 3 Of an husbands superiority ouer a wife , to be acknowledged by a wife . 269 4 Of a fond conceit that husband and wife are equall . 271 5 Of a wiues acknowledgment of her owne husbands superiority . 272 6 Of wiues denying honour to their owne husbands . 273 7 Of a wiues inward f●are of her husband . 274 8 Of a wiues base esteeme of her husband . 275 9 Of wiue-like sobriety . 277 10 Of wiue-like mildnesse . 278 11 Of wiue-like courtefie and obeysance . 279 12 Of wiue-like modesty in apparell . 280 13 Of a wiues reuerend speech to her husband . 281 14 Of the titles which wiues giue their husbands . 282 15 Of wiues meekenesse in their speeches . 284 16 Of a wiues speech of her husband in his absence . 285 17 of a wiues obedience in generall . 286 18 Of the cases wherein a wife hath power to order things of the house without her husbands consent . 287 19 Of diuers kinds of consent . 288 20 Of the things whereabout a wife must haue her husbands consent . 290 21 Of the things which a wife may dispose without her husbands consent . 291 22 Of a wiues liberty in extraordinary matters . 292 23 Of a wiues restraint in disposing goods without consent of her husband : and of the ground of that restraint . 293 24 Of the example of the Shunemite in asking her husbands consent . 294 25 Of the law of a wiues vow . 294 26 Of humane lawes which restraine wiues from disposing goods , without or against their husbands consent . 296 27 Of the inconueniences which may follow vpon a wiues disposing goods without or against her husbands consent . 297 28 Of propertie in goods , whether it giue liberty to dispose them as a wife will. 298 29 Of the reasons against a wiues property in the common goods of the family . 299 30 Of answers to the reasons for a wiues property . 301 31 Of the priuiledges of wiues aboue children and seruants in and about the goods of the family . 302 32 Of examples and other reasons alleadged for liberty of wiues to dispose goods . 302 33 Of the subiection of wiues in distributing goods to charitable vses . 304 34 Of generall exhortations to workes of mercy , how farre they binde wiues . 305 35 Of obedience to an husband in such things as he sinfully forbiddeth . 305 36 Of Zipporahs case in circumcising her son . 306 37 Of the wife of Chuzas case in ministring to Christ . 307 38 Of the restraint of wiues about allowance for themselues or families without their husbands consent . 308 39 Of a wiues subiection to her husband about children . 309 40 Of a wiues subiection to her husband about ordering seruants and beasts . 310 41 Of a wiues subiection in entertaining strangers , iournying abroad , and making vowes . 311 42 Of aberrations contrary to wiues subiection in doing things without or against their husbands consent . 312 43 Of a wiues actiue obedience . 315 44 Of a wiues willingnesse to dwell where her husband will. 315 45 Of a wiues readinesse to come to her husband when he requires it . 317 46 Of a wiues readinesse to doe what her husband requireth . 319 47 Of a wiues meeke taking a reproofe . 319 48 Of a wiues readinesse to redresse what her husband iustly reproueth in her . 322 49 Of a wiues contentment with her husbands present estate . 323 50 Of a wiues discontent at her husbands estate . 324 51 Of cases wherein a wife ought not to forbeare what her husband forbiddeth . 325 52 Of cases wherein a wife ought to forbeare what her husband requireth . 328 53 Of wiues faults in shewing more respect to their husbands then to God. 329 54 Of the manner of a wiues subiection to her husband . 329 55 Of wiues humility in euery duty . 331 56 Of wiues pride . 331 57 Of wiues sincerity in euery duty . 332 58 Of wiues complement all subiection . 334 59 Of wiues cheerefulnesse in euery duty . 334 60 Of wiues sullen and forced obedience . 334 61 Of wiues constancy in doing their duty . 335 62 Of wiues repenting their former goodnesse . 335 63 Of the extent of a wiues obedience . 336 64 Of a wiues labouring to bring her iudgement to the bent of her husbands . 337 65 Of wiues ouerweining conceit of their owne wisdome . 338 66 Of a wiues yeelding to her husband in such things as she thinketh not to be the meetest . 338 67 Of wiues making their owne will their law . 339 68 Of care in choosing such husbands as wiues may without griese be subiect vnto . 340 69 Of the reasons to moue wiues to doe their duties . 341 70 Of an husbands place . 342 71 Of an husbands office . 343 72 Of the resemblance betwixt Christ and an husband . 344 73 Of the benefit which a wife hath by an husband . 346 74 Of the example of the Church set before wiues . 347 IV. TREATISE . Of Husbands particular duties . § . 1 OF the generall heads of this treatise . 349 2 Of that loue which husbands owe their wiues . 350 3 Of an husbands hatred , and want of loue . 352 4 Of an husbands wise maintaining his authority . 353 5 Of husbands losing their authority . 355 6 Of husbands high account of wiues . 356 7 Of that fellowship which is betwixt man and wife , notwithstanding a wiues inferiority . 357 8 Of husbands too meane account of wiues . 358 9 Of husbands good esteeme of their owne wiues . 358 10 Of husbands preposterous opinion of their owne wiues . 359 11 Of husbands intire affection to their wiues . 360 12 Of the stoicall disposition of husbands to their wiues . 362 13 Of an husbands kinde acceptance of such things as his wife doth . 362 14 Of husbands fleighting and reiecting their wiues goodnesse . 363 15 Of husbands courteous accepting their wiues reuerend cariage . 364 16 Of husbands ready yeelding to their wiues humble suits . 365 17 Of husbands harshnesse to their wiues . 365 18 Of husbands forbearing to exact all that they may . 366 19 Of husbands too much strictnesse towards their wiues . 368 20 Of husbands encouraging their wiues in good things . 369 21 Of husbands vngratefull discouraging their wiues . 370 22 Of an husbands mildnesse . 370 23 Of husbands bitternesse . 371 24 Of the titles which an husband giueth to his wife . 371 25 Of an husbands manner of instructing his wife . 372 26 Of an husbands manner of commanding his wife any thing . 373 27 Of an husbands wise cariage , when his wife is erroneously scrupulous . 375 28 Of an husbands forbearing to presse things vnbeseeming a wiues place . 376 29 Of an husbands pressing his authority in weighty matters . 376 30 Of husbands too great pride in commanding . 377 31 Of husbands rare and milde vsing their commanding power . 378 32 Of husbands insolency and peremptorinesse . 378 33 Of an husbands reprouing his wife . 379 34 Of neglecting reproofe . 379 35 Of well ordering reproofe in the matter thereof . 379 36 Of vndue reproofe . 381 37 Whether an husband may reproue his wife for such things as he is guilty of . 382 38 Of well ordering reproofe in the manner thereof . 382 39 Of vndiscreet reproouing a wife . 385 40 Of an husbands amiable countenance towards his wife . 386 41 Of husbands too great austerity . 387 42 Of an husbands familiar gesture with his wife . 388 43 Of an husbands giuing fauours to his wife . 389 44 Of husbands beating their wiues . 389 45 Of an husbands bearing with his wiues infirmities . 393 46 Of an husbands prouident care for his wife . 396 47 Of an husbands prouiding meanes of spirituall edification for his wife . 397 48 Of neglecting their wiues edification . 398 49 Of an husbands prouiding things needfull for his wiues body . 399 50 Of an husbands prouident care for his wife about her childe-bearing . 399 51 Of neglecting wiues in their weaknesse . 401 52 Of an husbands prouiding for his wife according to his estate and ability . 402 53 Of an husbands niggardlinesse to his wife . 402 54 Of husbands allowing their wiues to bestow on others as they see good occasion . 403 55 Of husbands too great straitnesse ouer their wiues . 405 56 Of an husbands care to prouide for his wife so long as she shall liue . 406 57 Of husbands neglect of their wiues future estate . 407 58 Of an husbands protecting his wife from danger . 408 59 Of an husbands maintaining his wife against children of a former venter , and seruants . 409 60 Of neglecting to maintaine their wiues . 410 61 Of an husbands first beginning to loue his wife . 412 62 Of an husbands repaying vnkindnes for loue . 413 63 Of the truth of husbands loue . 414 64 Of husbands dissimulation . 414 65 Of the freenesse of husbands loue . 415 66 Of husbands louing for aduantage . 415 67 Of the purity of husbands loue . 415 68 Of husbands lightnesse . 416 69 Of husbands louing their wiues more then themselues . 417 70 Of husbands vnkindnesse . 417 71 Of combats in pretence of wiues honour . 417 72 Of husbands constancy in loue . 418 73 Of husbands variablenesse . 419 74 Of husbands louing their wiues as themselues . 419 75 Of Christs example a motiue to prouoke husbands to loue their wiues . 422 76 Of a mans loue to himselfe a motiue to prouoke him to loue his wife . 426 V. TREATISE . Of childrens duties . § . 1 OF the generall heads of childrens duties . 427 2 Of childrens loue to their parents . 428 3 Of a childes feare of his parents . 430 4 Of a childes reuerence in refraining speech before his parent , and in hearkning to his parent . 431 5 Of a childes reuerend framing his speech to his parent . 433 6 Of the vices in children contrary to the forenamed reuerence in speech . 434 7 Of childrens reuerend speeches of their parents . 435 8 Of a childes reuerend cariage to his parent . 436 9 Of childrens asking their parents blessing , whether it be lawfull or no. 437 10 Of the vices contrary to childrens reuerend gesture towards their parents . 439 11 Of childrens obedience . 441 12 Of childrens forbearing to doe things without consent of parents . 442 13 Of consent of parents for childrens entring into a calling . 443 14 Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens entring into religious orders without consent of parents . 443 15 Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens trauelling , and binding themselues prentises without consent of parents . 446 16 Of parents consent to the mariage of their children . 446 17 Of the equity of the point , and reasons why children should haue their parents consent vnto their mariage . 449 18 Of a childes carriage in case a parent prouide an vnfit mate or none at all . 449 19 Of the sinne of children in marying without their parents consent . 450 20 Of obiections for childrens marying without parents consent , answered . 451 21 Of s●ealing children from parents for mariage sake . 452 22 Of ministers sinne in marying children without parents consent . 452 23 Of childrens forbearing to dispose any of their parents goods without consent . 453 24 Of the sinne of children in purloining and wasting their parents goods . 454 25 Of childrens contentednesse to be apparelled after their parents minde and liking . 456 26 Of childrens forbearing to binde themselues to doe any thing against their parents consent . 456 27 Of childrens actiue obedience . 457 28 Of childrens obedience to their parents commandements . 457 29 Of childrens disobedience to their parents commandements . 459 30 Of childrens obedience to their parents instruction . 459 31 Of childrens patience to their parents reproofe . 460 32 Of childrens readinesse to amend what is iustly reproued by their parents . 461 33 Of childrens submission to their parents correction . 462 34 Of refusing , or abusing correction . 463 35 Of childrens conforming their iudgements to their parents . 464 36 Of childrens yeelding to practise at their parents command , such things as in their iudgements they cannot thinke very meet . 465 37 Of the restraint of childrens obedience . 467 38 Of childrens sinne in yeelding to their parents against God. 468 39 Of childrens recompence . 469 40 Of infirmities whereunto parents are subiect . 470 41 Of childrens bearing with their parents infirmities . 470 42 Of childrens couering their parents infirmities . 471 43 Of childrens bearing with their parents casuall necessities . 472 44 Of childrens releeuing their parents according to their need . 473 45 Of childrens care to burie their parents being dead . 475 46 Of decency wherewith children ought to see their parents buried . 477 47 Of childrens paying their parents debts after their death . 478 48 Of childrens suppressing euill reports , against their parents deceased . 479 49 Of childrens imitating their parents good example . 479 50 Of the superstitious dutie enioyned by Papists to children after their parents decease . 481 51 Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens seeking to reuenge their parents wrongs . 481 52 Of the manner of performing childrens duties . 482 53 Of the aberrations of children in the manner of their obedience . 483 54 Of the equall respect that Children are to beare to both parents . 484 55 Of pretences alledged to obey father rather then mother . 485 56 Of the difference of childrens subiection to naturall parents , and to such as only are in the place of parents . 487 57 Of childrens subiection to fathers and mothers in law . 488 58 Of childrens subiection to Guardians , Tutors , &c. 489 59 Of the place of parents , whereby children ought to be moued to obey them . 490 60 Of the equitie whereby children should be moued to obey their parents . 491 61 Of Gods accepting childrens obedience . 492 62 Of Gods charge , how inuiolable a bond it is to tie children to obey their parents . 493 63 Of the title First , giuen to the fift commandement . 494 64 Of Gods promise mouing children to obey their parents . 495 VI. TREATISE . Of Parents Duties . § . 1. OF the heads of parents duties . 497 2 Of that loue which parents owe to their children . 498 3 Of the contraries to loue . 499 4 Of parents praying for their children . 500 5 Of vices contrary to parents praying for their children . 501 6 Of parents endeuouring to be righteous that they may leaue Gods blessing to their children . 502 7 Of the preposterous course which couetous and vniust parents take for the good of their children . 503 8 Of parents prouidence for their children . 505 9 Of a mothers care ouer her childe while it is in her wombe . 505 10 Of prouiding things needfull for the childe so soone as it is borne : and of cruelty contrary thereunto . 506 11 Of giuing sucke to children . 507 12 Of mothers giuing sucke to their owne children . 508 13 Of the obiections for putting children forth to nurse . 513 14 Of the fathers duty in incouraging his wife to nurse her childe . 517 15 Of the faults contrary to a mothers nursing her childe . 517 16 Of a fathers fault in hindring his wiues nursing of her childe . 518 17 Of parents ioynt care about their childrens baptisme . 518 18 Of the reasons to moue parents to see their children baptised . 519 19 Of parents procuring their children to be rightly baptised . 521 20 Of parents care to giue a fit name to their childe at his baptisme . 522 21 Of parents care in bringing their children to be baptised in due season . 523 22 Of parents faults in neglecting their childrens Baptisme . 523 23 Of parents prouiding things needfull for the life and health of their children . 525 24 Of parents too much niggardlinesse , and carelesnesse towards their children . 527 25 Of parents too much lauishnesse and indulgency vpon their children . 527 26 Of well nurturing children . 529 27 Of parents neglect in nurturing children . 529 28 Of parents teaching their children good manners . 530 29 Of the obiections against good manners . 531 30 Of parents suffering their children to be rudely brought vp . 532 31 Of parents training vp their children to some good calling . 532 32 Of parents care in choosing a fit calling for their children . 534 33 Of parents faults contrary to their duty of training their children vp to a calling . 535 34 Of parents teaching their children piety . 536 35 Of directing parents how to teach their children true piety . 539 36 Of parents faults contrary to their dutie of teaching their children piety . 542 37 Of instructing children so soone as they are capable . 543 38 Of mothers peculiar care in nurturing young children . 546 39 Of letting slip the best time for nurture . 547 40 Of parents continuing to nurture their children . 547 41 Of parents folly in letting goe all their power ouer their children . 548 42 Of adding admonition to instruction . 548 43 Of parents wearisomnesse in instructing their children . 550 44 Of parents reprouing their children . 550 45 Of parents cockering their children : 551 46 Of correcting children . 552 47 A direction to parents in correcting their children . 555 48 Of parents too much indulgency . 557 49 Of parents too much scuerity in correcting their children . 558 50 Of parents care in prouiding fit callings for their children . 558 51 Direction for parents in prouiding callings for their children . 560 52 Of the extremes contrary to a parents lawfull care in prouiding fit callings for his children . 561 53 Of parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children . 563 54 Direction to parents in prouiding mariages . 564 55 Of the extremes contrary to parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children . 564 56 Of parents prouiding a stocke for callings and mariages of their children . 565 57 Of the extremes contrary to a parents prouiding portions for his children . 566 58 Of parents last speech to their children . 567 59 Of parents last blessing to their children . 569 60 Of parents care to commend their children to some faithfull friends . 569 61 Of parents neglect of their children for time to come . 570 62 Of parents making a will before they die . 570 63 Of neglecting to make a will. 571 64 Of parents leauing their estate to their children when they die . 572 65 Of the inconueniences which improuident parents bring their children vnto after their death . 573 66 Of parents impartiall respect to all their children . 575 67 Of parents preferring a dutifull childe before a disobedient childe . 576 68 Of the prerogatiue of the first borne sonne . 576 69 Of parents partiality towards some children . 578 70 Of the causes for which the first borne may be disinherited . 579 71 Of the dutie of fathers and mothers in law . 580 72 Of the peruerse carriage of fathers and mothers in law to their children . 581 73 Of the faults of parents to their childrens husbands and wiues . 582 74 Of their duty who are in stead of parents to orphants . 583 75 Of the common neglect of orphants . 584 76 Of the duty of guardians . 584 77 Of the fraud of guardians . 585 78 Of the duties of Schoolemasters and Tutors . 586 79 Of the negligence of Schoolemasters and Tutors . 587 VII . TREATISE . Of Seruants Duties . § . 1. A Resolution of the Apostles direction to seruants . 589 2 Of the lawfulnesse of a masters place and power . 591 3 Of the Anabaptists arguments against the authority of masters and subiection of seruants . 592 4 Of a seruants feare of his master . 594 5 Of the extremes contrary to seruants feare of their master . 595 6 Of seruants reuerence in speech . 596 7 Of the vices contrary to a seruants reuerance in speech . 599 8 Of seruants reuerend behauiour to their masters . 601 9 Of the faults of seruants contrary to reuerence in carriage . 602 10 Of seruants obedience . 603 11 Of seruants forbearing to doe things without their masters consent . 604 12 Of the vnlawfull liberty which seruants take to themselues . 606 13 Of seruants obedience to their masters commandements . 608 14 Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in matters of their calling . 608 15 Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in piety . 609 16 Of seruants faults contrary to obedience in matters of religion . 610 17 Of seruants obedience to reproofe and correction . 611 18 Of the extremes contrary to seruants patient hearing of reproofe and correction . 613 19 Of seruants amending that for which they are iustly reproued or corrected . 614 20 Of seruing with trembling . 615 21 Of seruing with sincerity . 616 22 Of seruing for conscience sake . 617 23 Of seruants willingnesse to performe their dutie . 618 24 Of seruants quicknesse , and diligence in their seruice . 619 25 Of seruants faithfulnesse . 622 26 Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters goods . 623 27 Of seruants carelesnesse ouer their masters goods . 624 28 Of seruants fraud . 625 29 Of seruants faithfulnesse in the businesses which they are to dispatch for their masters . 626 30 Of seruants faithfulnesse in keeping their masters secrets , and concealing their infirmities . 628 31 Of seruants faithfulnesse in helping one another . 629 32 Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters children . 630 33 Of seruants faithfulnesse in regard of their masters or mistresses bed-fellow . 632 34 Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters person . 633 35 Of the meanes to make seruants faithfull . 634 36 Of seruants endeuour to make their iudgements agree with their masters . 635 37 Of seruants yeelding to doe such things at their masters command , as they cannot thinke to be most meet . 636 38 Of seruants forbearing to obey their master against God. 637 39 Of seruants choosing good masters . 639 40 Of the first motiue to enforce seruants duties , The Place of Masters . 641 41 Of the second motiue , The Place of Seruants . 642 42 Of the third motiue , Gods will 642 43 Of the fourth motiue , Reward of good seruice . 643 VII . TREATISE . Of Masters duties . § . 1. OF the heads of masters duties . 646 2 Of masters choosing good seruants . 647 3 Of masters carelesnesse in choosing seruants . 649 4 Of masters maintaining their authority . 650 5 Of masters making their authority to be despised . 651 6 Of masters too great rigor . 652 7 Of masters commanding power restrained to things lawfull . 653 8 Of masters presuming aboue their authority . 654 9 Of masters commanding seruants to doe their dutie . 655 10 Of the sinne of masters in suffering seruants to neglect their dutie . 656 11 Of a masters wisdome in ordering things indifferent . 656 12 Of masters offence against expediency . 657 13 Of the power of masters to correct their seruants . 658 14 Of the restraint of masters power , that it reacheth not to their seruants life . 659 15 Of masters excesse in correcting seruants . 660 16 Of masters ordering that correction which they giue to their seruants . 661 17 Of masters power ouer their seruants in and about their mariage . 662 18 Of masters rigor in forcing mariages vpon their seruants : or in seperating man and wife . 664 19 Of masters power to dispose their seruants person . 664 20 Of masters well managing their authority . 665 21 Of masters endeuouring the saluation of their seruants . 666 22 Of masters neglecting to edifie their seruants . 668 23 Of allowing seruants sufficient food . 668 24 Of defect and excesse in allowing seruants food . 669 25 Of masters care about their seruants apparell . 670 26 Of moderating seruants labour . 671 27 Of affording seruants fit means for their worke . 672 28 Of affording seasonable rest to seruants . 672 29 Of denying seasonable rest to seruants . 673 30 Of masters offence in keeping seruants from the rest of the Lords day . 674 31 Of allowing time of recreation to seruants . 675 32 Of masters care ouer their seruants in sicknesse and after death . 675 33 Of neglect of seruants in sicknesse and after they are dead . 677 34 Of masters prouiding for the future estate of their seruants . 678 35 Of well imploying seruants . 679 36 Of exercising seruants to a calling . 679 37 Of appointing to euery seruant his particular function . 681 38 Of disorders in families through masters negligence . 682 39 Of masters ouerseeing the waies of their seruants . 682 40 Of prouoking seruants to their duty both by faire and soule meanes . 683 41 Of paying seruants their wages . 684 42 Of masters iustice about their seruants wages . 685 43 Of suffering seruants to prouide for themselues . 686 44 Of kindnesse to be shewed to good seruants . 686 45 Of vnkinde dealing with good seruants . 688 46 Of the subiection vnder which masters are . 689 47 Of the equality betwixt masters and seruants in relation to God. 691 48 Of Gods being in heauen , how it is a motiue to prouoke masters well to respect their seruants . 691 49 Of Gods impartiall respect of all . 693 The first Treatise . AN EXPOSITION OF THAT PART OF SCRIPTVRE out of which Domesticall Duties are raised . EPHES. 5. 21. Submit your selues one to another in the feare of God. §. 1. Of the Apostles transition from generall duties to particulars . AS there are two vocations whereunto it hath pleased God to call euery one ; one Generall , by vertue whereof certaine common duties which are to be performed of all men , are required , ( as knowledge , faith , obedience , repentance , loue , mercie , iustice , truth , &c. ) the other Particular , by vertue whereof certaine peculiar duties are required of seuerall persons , according to those distinct places wherein the Diuine Prouidence hath set them in Common-wealth , Church , or family ; so ought Gods Ministers to be carefull in instructing Gods people in both kindes of duties ; both those which concerne their generall , and those also which concerne their particular calling . Accordingly S. Paul ( who , as a Moses , was faithfull in all the house of God ) after he had sufficiently instructed Gods Church in such generall duties , as belong to all Christians , of what sex , state , degree , or condition soeuer they be , proceedeth to lay downe certaine particular duties , which appertaine to particular callings and conditions : among which , he maketh choise of those which God hath established in a family . With excellent Art doth he passe from those generals , to these particulars : laying downe a transition betwixt them , in these words , Submitting your selues one to another in the feare of God ; which words haue reference both to that which goeth before , and also to that which followeth after . The forme and manner of setting downe this verse , with a participle thus , submitting , sheweth that it dependeth on that which went before , and so hath reference thereunto . Againe , the word it selfe being the very same which is vsed in the next verse following , sheweth , that this verse containeth the summe of that which followeth , and so hath reference thereunto , as a generall vnto particulars . This manner of passing from one point to another , by a perfect transition which looketh both wayes , both to that which is past , and to that which commeth on , as it is very elegant , so is it frequent with this our Apostle . Whereby he teacheth vs , so to giue heed to that which followeth , as we forget not that which is past : as we must giue diligent attention to that which remaineth , so we must well retaine that which we haue heard , and not let it slip : otherwise , if ( as one naile driueth out another ) one precept maketh another to be forgotten , it will be altogether in vaine to adde line vnto line , or precept vnto precept . §. 2. Of ioyning seruice to men with our praising of God. As this verse hath reference to that which was deliuered before , concerning our dutie to God , it teacheth vs this lesson : It is the dutie of Christians as to set forth the praise of God , so to be seruiceable one to another . For this purpose in the Decalogue to the first table , which prescribeth that duty which we owe to God , is added the second table , which declareth the seruice that we owe one to another : and he that said , b The first and great Commandement is this , Thou shalt loue the Lord , &c. said also , The second is like to this , Thou shalt loue thy neighbour , &c. whereupon the c Apostle declaring what those sacrifices be wherewith God is well pleased , ioyneth these two together , to giue thankes to God , and to doe good to man. The seruice which in the feare of God we performe one to another , is an euident and reall demonstration of the respect we beare vnto God. d To God our goodnesse extendeth not . e He is so high aboue vs , so perfect and compleat in himselfe , that neither can we giue to him , nor he receiue of vs. But in his owne stead he hath placed our brother like to our selues ; to whom , f as we may doe hurt , so by our faithfull seruice we may doe much g good : in doing whereof God is much honoured . This discouereth their hypocrisie , who make great pretence of praising God , and yet are scornfull , and disdainfull to their brethren , and slothfull to doe any seruice to man : These mens religion is vaine . By this note did the Prophets in their time , and Christ and his Apostles in their time also , discouer the hypocrisie of those among whom they liued : and so may we also in our times . For many there be , who frequently in their houses , and in the middest of the Congregation sing praise vnto God , and performe other parts of Gods outward worship , but towards one another , are proud , stout , enuious , vnmercifull , vniust , slanderous , and very backward to doe any good seruice . Surely , that outward seruice which they pretend to performe to God , doth not so much wipe out the spot of prophanesse , as their neglect of dutie vnto man brandeth their foreheads with the stampe of hypocrisie . For our parts , let vs not vpon pretext of one dutie , though it may seeme to be the waightier , thinke to shift off another ; lest that fearefull woe which Christ denounced against the Scribes and Pharisies fall vpon our pates . As God is carefull to instruct vs how to carrie our selues both to his owne Maiestie , and also one to another , so let vs in both approue our selues to him : remembring what Christ said to the Pharisies , These ought ye to haue done , and not to leaue the other vndone . The same Lord that requireth praise to his owne Maiestie , inioyneth mutuall seruice one to another ; the neglect of this , as well as of that , sheweth too light respect of his will and pleasure : What therefore God hath ioyned together , let not man put asunder . §. 3. Of euery ones submitting himselfe to another . Againe , as this verse hath reference to that which followeth , it declareth the generall summe of all , which is mutually to submit our selues one to another in the feare of God. The parts hereof are two : 1. An Exhortation . 2. A Direction . In the exhortation is noted , both the dutie it selfe in this word submit , and also the parties to whom it is to be performed , one to another . Both branches of the exhortation , viz. the dutie , and the parties ioyned together , afford this doctrine , that It is a generall mutuall dutie appertaining to all Christians , to submit themselues one to another : For this precept is as generall as any of the former , belonging to all sorts and degrees whatsoeuer : and so much doth this word one another imply : in which extent the Apostle in another place exhorteth to serue one another : and againe , euery man to seeke anothers wealth . Concerning inferiours , it is without question cleare , that they ought to submit themselues to their superiours : yea , concerning equals no great question can be made , but they in giuing honour must goe one before another , and so submit themselues : but concerning superiours , iust question may be made , whether it be a dutie required of them to submit themselues to their inferiours . To resolue this doubt , we must first distinguish betwixt subiection of reuerence , and subiection of seruice . Subiection of reuerence is that whereby one testifieth an eminencie and superioritie in them whom he reuerenceth , and that in speech , by giuing them titles of honour ; or in gesture , by some kinde of obeysance ; or in action , by a ready obeying of their commandement . This is proper to inferiours . Subiection of seruice is that whereby one in his place is ready to doe what good he can to another . This is common to all Christians : a dutie which euen superiours owe to inferiours , according to the fore-named extent of this word one another : in which respect euen the highest gouernour on earth is called a minister , for the good of such as are vnder him . Secondly , we must put difference betwixt the worke it selfe , and the manner of doing it . That worke which in it selfe is a worke of superioritie and authoritie , in the manner of doing it may be a worke of submission , viz. if it be done in humilitie and meeknesse of minde . The Magistrate by ruling with meeknesse and humilitie , submitteth himselfe to his subiect . In this respect the Apostle exhorteth that nothing ( no not the highest and greatest workes that can be ) be done in vaine-glory , but in meeknesse . Thirdly , we must distinguish betwixt the seuerall places wherein men are : for euen they who are superiours to some , are inferiours to others : as he that said , I haue vnder me , and am vnder authoritie . The master that hath seruants vnder him , may be vnder the authoritie of a Magistrate . Yea , God hath so disposed euery ones seuerall place , as there is not any one , but in some respect is vnder another . The wife , though a mother of children , is vnder her husband . The husband , though head of a family , is vnder publike Magistrates . Publike Magistrates one vnder another , and all vnder the King. The King himselfe vnder God and his word deliuered by his Ambassadours , whereunto the highest are to submit themselues . And Ministers of the word , as subiects , are vnder their Kings and Gouernours . He that saith , Let euery soule be subiect to the higher powers , excepteth not Ministers of the word : and he that saith , obey them that haue the ouersight of you , and submit your selues , excepteth not kings : only the difference is in this , that the authoritie of the king is in himselfe , and in his owne name he may command obedience to be performed to himselfe : but the authoritie of a Minister is in Christ , and in Christs name only may he require obedience to be performed to Christ . The reason why all are bound to submit themselues one to another is , because euery one is set in his place by God , not so much for himselfe , as for the good of others : whereupon the Apostle exhorteth , that none seeke his owne , but euery man anothers wealth . Euen Gouernours are aduanced to places of dignitie and authoritie , rather for the good of their subiects then for their owne honour . Their callings are in truth offices of seruice , yea burdens vnder which they must willingly put their shoulders , being called of God , and of which they are to giue an account concerning the good which they haue done to others : for the effecting whereof , it is needfull that they submit themselues . Let euery one therefore high and low , rich and poore , superiour and inferiour , Magistrate and subiect , Minister and people , husband and wife , parent and childe , master and seruant , neighbours and fellowes , all of all sorts in their seuerall places take notice of their dutie in this point of submission , and make conscience to put it in practice : Magistrates , by procuring the wealth and peace of their people , as Mordecai : Ministers , by making themselues seruants vnto their people , not seeking their owne profit , but the profit of many , that they may be saued , as Paul : Fathers , by well educating their children , and taking heed that they prouoke them not to wrath , as Dauid : Husbands , by dwelling with their wiues according to knowledge ; giuing honour to the wife as to the weaker vessell , as Abraham : Masters , by doing that which is iust and equall to their seruants , as the Centurion : Euery one , by being of like affection one towards another , and by seruing one another in loue , according to the Apostles rule . Let this dutie of submission be first well learned , and then all other duties will better be performed . Be not high minded , nor swell one against another . Though in outward estate some may be higher than other , yet in Christ all are one whether bond or free : all members of one and the same body . Now consider the mutuall affection ( as I may so speake ) of the members of a naturall body one towards another : not any one of them will puffe it selfe vp , and rise against the other : the head which is the highest and of greatest honour will submit it selfe to the feet in performing the dutie of an head , as well as the feet to the head in performing their dutie ; so all other parts . Neither is it hereby implied that they which are in place of dignitie and authoritie should forget or relinquish their place , dignitie , or authoritie , and become as inferiours vnder authoritie , no more than the head doth : for the head in submitting it selfe doth not goe vpon the ground and beare the body , as the feet ; but it submitteth it selfe by directing and gouerning the other parts , and that with all the humilitie , meeknesse , and gentlenesse that it can . So must all superiours : much more must equals and inferiours learne with humilitie , and meeknesse , without scorne or disdaine , to performe their dutie : this is that which was before by the Apostle expresly mentioned , and is here againe intimated ; none are exempted and priuileged from it . We know that it is vnnaturall , and vnbeseeming the head to scorne the feet , and to swell against them , but more than monstrous for one hand to scorn another : what shall we then say if the feet swel against the head ? Surely such scorne and disdaine among the members , would cause not only great disturbance , but also vtter ruine to the body . And can it be otherwise in a politique body ? But on the contrarie , when all of all sorts shall ( as hath beene before shewed ) willingly submit themselues one to another , the whole body , and euery member thereof will reape good thereby : yea , by this mutuall submission , as we doe good , so we shall receiue good . §. 4. Of the feare of God. Hitherto of the exhortation . The direction followeth . In the feare of the Lord. This clause is added , to declare partly the meanes , how men may be brought to submit themselues readily one to another : and partly the manner , how they ought to submit themselues . The feare of the Lord is both the efficient cause that moueth a true Christian willingly to performe all dutie to man , and also the end whereunto he referreth euery thing that he doth . For the better conceiuing whereof , I will briefly declare 1. What this feare of the Lord is . 2. How the Lord is the proper obiect of it . 3. What is the extent thereof . 4. Why it is so much vrged . First , feare of God is an awfull respect of the diuine Maiestie . Sometimes it ariseth from faith in the mercy and goodnesse of God : for when the heart of man hath once felt a sweet taste of Gods goodnesse , and found that in his fauour only all happinesse consisteth , it is strucken with such an inward awe and reuerence , as it would not for any thing displease his Maiestie , but rather doe whatsoeuer it may know to be pleasing and acceptable vnto him . For these are two effects which arise from this kinde of feare of God : 1. A carefull endeuour to please God , in which respect good king Iehosaphat hauing exhorted his Iudges to execute the iudgement of the Lord aright , addeth this clause as a motiue thereunto , Let the feare of the Lord be vpon you : implying thereby that Gods feare would make them endeuour to approue themselues to God. 2. A carefull auoiding of such things as offend the Maiesty of God , and grieue his spirit : in which respect the Wiseman saith , The feare of the Lord is to hate euill : and of Iob it is said that he fearing God departed from euill . Sometimes againe , awe and dread of the diuine Maiestie ariseth from diffidence : For when a mans heart doubteth of Gods mercy , and expecteth nothing but vengeance , the very thought of God striketh an awe or rather dread into him , and so maketh him feare God. From this double cause of feare , whereof one is contrary to another , hath arisen that vsuall distinction of a filiall or sonne-like feare , and a seruile or slauish feare : which distinction is grounded on these words of the Apostle , ye haue not receiued the spirit of bondage againe to feare ( this is a seruile feare ) but ye haue receiued the spirit of adoption whereby we cry , Abba , father : this causeth a filiall feare . The filiall feare is such a feare as dutifull children beare to their fathers . But the seruile feare is such an one as bondslaues beare to their masters . A sonne feareth simply to offend or displease his father : so as * it is accompanied with loue . A bondslaue feareth nothing but the punishment of his offence ; so as it is ioyned with hatred : and such an one feareth not to sinne , but to burne in hell for sinne . Faithfull Abraham like a gratious childe feared God ( as Gods Angell beareth witnesse , Gen. 22. 12. ) when he was ready rather to sacrifice his only sonne , then offend God by refusing to obey his commandement . But faithlesse Adam like a seruile bondslaue feared God ( as he himselfe testifieth against himselfe Gen. 3 10. ) when after he had broken Gods commandement , he hid himselfe from the presence of God. This slauish feare is a plaine diabolicall feare ( for the deuils so feare as they tremble : ) It maketh men wish there were no hell , no day of Iudgement , no Iudge , yea no God. This is that feare without which we must serue the Lord. In this feare to submit ones selfe is nothing acceptable to God : It is therefore the filiall feare which is here meant . Secondly , of this feare God is the proper obiect , as by this and many more testimonies of Scripture is euident , where the feare of God and of the Lord is mentioned . This feare hath so proper a relation vnto God , as the Scripture stileth God by a kinde of proprietie , with this title Feare : for where Iaakob mentioneth the feare of Isaak , he meaneth the Lord whom Isaak feared . It is then vnlawfull to feare any but God ? No : Men also may be feared , as Princes , Parents , Masters , and other superiours ; For the Apostle exhorting to giue euery one their due , giueth this instance , feare , to whom feare is due . But yet may God notwithstanding be said to be the proper obiect of feare , because all the feare that any way is due to any creature , is due to him in and for the Lord whose image he carrieth : so as in truth it is not so much the person of a man , as the image of God placed in him , by vertue of some authoritie or dignitie appertaining to him , which is to be feared . If there should fall out any such opposition betwixt God and man , as in fearing man our feare would be withdrawne from God , then the rule of Christ is to take place , which is this , feare not them which kill the body , but are not able to kill the soule : but rather feare him which is able to destroy both soule and body in hell . Thirdly , the extent of this true filiall feare of God is very large . No one point throughout the whole Scripture is more vrged than this feare of the Lord. It is oft added to other duties , as that whereby they are seasoned , and without which they cannot well be performed : wherefore we are commanded to serue the Lord in feare , to perfect holinesse in the feare of God , to worke out our saluation with feare : and the Churches are commended for walking in the feare of the Lord : so likewise particular men as a Abram , b Ioseph , c Iob , and many other : yea the whole worship of God is oft comprised vnder this branch of feare : whereupon our Sauiour Christ alleaging this text , thou shalt feare the Lord thy God , thus expresseth it , thou shalt worship the Lord thy God. And againe where the Lord by his Prophet Isay saith , Their feare toward me is taught by the precept of men , Christ thus quoteth that text , In vaine doe they worship me , teaching for doctrines the commandements of men : out of which places compared together , it is euident , that vnder the feare of God , is comprised the worship of God. Yea , all that dutie which we owe to God and man is comprised vnder this title , the feare of God : for Dauid when he would in one word declare the summe and substance of all that which a Minister ought to teach his people , saith , I will teach you the feare of the Lord. Fourthly , The reason why the Holy Ghost so much vrgeth the feare of God , and that in so large an extent as hath beene shewed , I take to be this ; to shew a difference betwixt that integritie and perfection of Gods image which was at mans creation first planted in him , and the renouation thereof while here he liueth in this world . So compleat and perfect was then Gods image in man , as he needed no other motiue to prouoke him to any dutie but loue . Wherefore when the Holy Ghost would set forth that perfection of Gods image first planted in man , he addeth this title Loue vnto other duties , whether they concerne God or man. Concerning God , Moses exhorteth Israel to loue the Lord and serue him : and againe , to loue the Lord , to walke in his waies , to keepe his commandements , &c. Concerning man , the Apostle exhorteth to serue one another by loue : and to doe all things in loue . Yea , sometimes the Holy Ghost is pleased to comprise all duties vnder loue : In which respect Christ calleth this commandement ( Thou shalt loue the Lord ) the great commandement , which compriseth all the commandements of the first table vnder it : and for the second table , S. Paul saith , that loue is the fulfilling of the law . But by Adams fall , and the corruption which thereby infected mans nature , the loue of God hath waxed cold in man , and though the Saints be created againe according to that image of God , yet while in this world they liue , that image is not so perfect as it was , the flesh remaineth in the best : in which respect God hath fast fixed this affection of feare in mans heart , and thereby both restraineth him from sinne , and also prouoketh him vnto euery good dutie . §. 5. Of the feare of God mouing vs to doe seruice to men . Hauing briefly declared the nature , obiect , extent , and vse of feare , I returne to the point in hand , viz. to shew 1. how it is here laid downe as a motiue to stirre vp men to performe the dutie here required : for by this clause , in the feare of the Lord , the Apostle implieth that It is the feare of God which moueth men conscionably to submit themselues one to another . This made d Dauid so well to rule the people of God : and e Ioseph to deale so well with his brethren : yea , f this is noted to be the cause of the righteous regiment of Christ himselfe . Well did that good King Iehosaphat know this , and therefore when he appointed Iudges ouer his people , as a motiue to stirre them vp to execute the iudgements of the Lord aright , he saith vnto them , Let the feare of the Lord be vpon you . So also S. Peter , to moue subiects to honour their King , prefixeth this exhortation , Feare God. By feare of man , may one be brought to submit himselfe to another : as a magistrate may be moued to deale iustly and mildly with his people through feare of insurrections and rebellions : subiects may by seuere lawes and tyrannie be brought to submit themselues : and so other inferiours also by threats , by hard vsage , and other by-respects . 1. Though feare of man be a motiue , yet it followeth not , that therefore feare of God should be no motiue : it may be another motiue , and a better motiue . 2. The submission which is performed through feare of man is a forced and a slauish submission , nothing acceptable to God : but that which is performed through a true filiall feare of God , is a free , willing , ready , cheerefull , conscionable submission : such a submission as will stirre vs vp to doe the best good we can thereby vnto them , to whom we submit our selues , and so is more acceptable to God , by reason of the cause thereof , and more profitable vnto man , by reason of the effect and fruit thereof . For a true feare of God maketh vs more respect what God requireth and commandeth , than what our corrupt heart desireth and suggesteth : It subdueth our vnruly passions , and bringeth them within compasse of dutie : It maketh vs deny our selues and our owne desires : and though through the corruption of our nature and inborne pride we be loth to submit , yet will Gods feare bring downe that proud minde , and make vs humble and gentle . It will keepe those who are in authoritie from tyranny , crueltie , and ouer-much seueritie : and it will keepe those who are vnder subiection from dissimulation , deceit , and priuie conspiracies . Behold how necessarie it is , that a true feare of the Lord be planted in mens hearts , in the hearts of Kings and all Gouernours , in the hearts of subiects and all people , whether superiours or inferiours . Where no feare of God is , there will be no good submission vnto man. Abraham thought that the men of Gerar would haue no respect to him or his wife , nor make conscience of common honestie , nor abstaine from innocent bloud , because he saw no feare of God in that place : and the Apostle hauing reckoned vp many notorious effects of mans naturall corruption , concludeth all with this , as the cause of all , There is no feare of God before their eyes . Wherefore let Magistrates , Parents , Masters , and all in authoritie , haue especiall care that their subiects , children , seruants , and all vnder them may be taught and brought to feare the Lord. I dare auouch it , that such inferiours which are taught to feare God , will doe better seruiee to their superiours , than such as feare their superiours only as men , and feare not God. Let Ministers especially vrge and presse vpon the consciences of men a feare of God. Let all inferiours pray that the feare of the Lord may be planted in the hearts of their superiours , that so they may liue a quiet and peaceable life in all godlinesse and honestie vnder them . Happie is that kingdome where Magistrates and subiects feare the Lord. Happie is that Church where Ministers and people feare the Lord. Happie is that family where husband and wife , parents and children , master and seruants feare the Lord. In such a Kingdome , Church , and family , will euery one , to the mutuall good one of another , submit themselues one to another . But if such as feare not God submit themselues , whether they be superiours or inferiours , it is for their owne ends and aduantages , and not for their good to whom they submit themselues . §. 6. Of limiting all dutie to man , within the compasse of the feare of God. Againe , as this clause ( In the feare of the Lord ) declareth the manner of submission , it sheweth , that No submission is to be performed vnto man , but that which may stand with the feare of God. Whereby we shew that we haue respect to God , and labour aboue all to approue our selues to him . Thus Dauid is commanded to rule in the feare of God : and other Magistrates to performe their dutie in the feare of the Lord : which Nehemiah that good Gouernour was carefull to doe . So also subiects are to obey in the feare of the Lord , which the Apostle implieth by prefixing this precept , Feare God , before that , Honour the King ; as if he had said , so honour the King , as in and thereby you may manifest your feare of God : let not this latter crosse the former . Seruants likewise are commanded to be obedient vnto their Masters with this prouiso , fearing the Lord. Such phrases as these , For the Lords sake , As vnto the Lord , In the Lord , As seruants of Christ , with the like , being annexed to the duties of inferiours , doe imply as much . Great reason there is that all seruice should be limited with the feare of God : for God is the highest Lord to whom all seruice primarily and principally is due : whatsoeuer seruice is due to any man , high or low , is due in and for the Lord. The Lord hath set superiours in the places of eminencie , wherein they beare the image of God. The Lord also hath set inferiours in their places , and commended them as his charge to the gouernment of those who are ouer them . He that obeyeth not those who are ouer him in the feare of God , sheweth no respect of Gods image : and he who gouerneth not those who are vnder him in the feare of God , sheweth no respect of Gods charge . Besides , God is that great Iudge to whom all of all sorts , superiours and inferiours are to giue an account of their seruice . Though by our seruice we haue neuer so well approued our selues to men , yet if we haue not therein had respect vnto God , and approued our selues to him , with what face may we appeare before his dreadfull iudgement seat ? Can the fauour of those whom we haue pleased in this world , protect and shelter vs from the fury of Gods displeasure ? Behold the folly of such Gouernours as wholly apply themselues to the fancie of their people , yea though it be against the Lord and his word . This was Adams folly , who at his wiues motion did eat of the forbidden fruit . This was Aarons folly , who to please the people , erected an Idoll . And this was Sauls folly , who against Gods expresse prohibition suffered his people to take some of the spoile of the Amalekites . The like may be said of Ioash , who hearkned to his Princes to set vp Idols : and of Pilate , who to please the people , against his conscience , deliuered Christ to be crucified . The fearefull issue of this their submission , not seasoned with a feare of God , but contrary thereunto , may be a warning to all superiours , to take heed how they seeke to please them that are vnder them , more than God who is aboue them . The issue of Adams , Aarons , Sauls , and Ioash his base submission , is noted by the Holy Ghost in their seuerall histories . Of Pilate it is recorded , that being brought into extreme necessitie , he laid violent hands vpon himselfe . Neither is it to be accounted folly only in superiours to submit themselues to their inferiours against the Lord , but also in inferiours to their superiours : for thereby they shew that they feare man more than God , which Christ expresly forbiddeth his friends to doe . The captaines which went to fetch Eliah , obeyed their king therein ; but what got they thereby ? was the king able to saue them from the fire which God sent downe from heauen vpon them ? The women reproued for offering incense to the Queene of heauen , did it not without their husbands , yet were they not excused thereby . The children and others in the familie submitted themselues to Dathan and Abiram in standing in the doore of their tents at defiance against Moses ; but because it was not in the Lord , but against him , they were not exempted from the iudgement . Wherefore let all of all sorts set the feare of God as a marke before them to aime at in all their actions . Let superiours a neither doe any thing to giue content to their inferiours : b nor suffer any thing to be done for their sakes by their inferiours , which cannot stand with the feare of God. And let inferiours c nor doe , d nor forbeare to doe at the will of their superiours any thing sweruing from the feare of God : but euery one submit themselues one to another in the feare of God. §. 7. Of performing the duties of particular callings . EPHES. 5. 22. Wiues submit your selues vnto your owne husbands , as vnto the Lord. FRom that generall direction concerning mutuall submission , the Apostle commeth to certaine particulars , by which he exemplifieth the same : and teacheth vs , that It is not sufficient to performe generall duties of Christianitie , vnlesse also we be conscionable in performing the particular duties of our seuerall callings . A conscionable performance of those particular duties is one part of our a walking worthy of the vocation wherewith we are called : and therefore the Apostle , for illustration and exemplification thereof , doth reckon vp sundry particulars , both in this and b other Epistles : and so doe c other Apostles . And d Titus is charged to teach them . God himselfe hath giuen a patterne hereof in his Law : for the maine scope of the fifth Commandement tendeth to instruct vs in the particular duties of our seuerall callings . Hereby much credit is brought to our profession , and the e doctrine of God our Sauiour is adorned . And much good is hereby both mutually communicated one to another , and receiued one from another : for our particular places and callings are those bonds whereby persons are firmely and fitly knit together , as the members of a naturall body by nerues , arteries , sinewes , veines , and the like , by which life , sense and motion is communicated from one to another . Let therefore notice be taken of the particular callings wherein God hath set vs , and of the seuerall duties of those callings , and conscience be vsed in the practise of them . He is no good Christian that is carelesse herein . A bad husband , wife , parent , childe , master , seruant , magistrate or minister , is no good Christian . §. 8. Of the lawfulnesse of priuate functions in a familie . Among other particular callings the Apostle maketh choice of those which God hath settled in priuate families , and is accurat in reciting the seuerall and distinct orders thereof , ( for a family consisteth of these three orders , Husbands , Parents , Masters , all which he Wiues , Children , Seruants ,   reckoneth vp ) yea he is also copious , and earnest in vrging the duties which appertaine to them . Whence wee may well inferre , that The priuate vocations of a family , and functions appertaining thereto , are such as Christians are called vnto by God , and in the exercising whereof , they may and must imploy some part of their time . For can we thinke that the Holy Ghost ( who , as the Philosophers speake of nature , doth nothing in vaine ) would so distinctly set downe these priuate duties , & so forcibly vrge them , if they did not well become , and neerely concerne Christians ? All the places in Scripture which require family-duties , are proofs of the truth of this doctrine . The reasons of this doctrine are cleere ; for the family is a seminary of the Church and common-wealth . It is as a Bee-hive , in which is the stocke , and out of which are sent many swarmes of Bees : for in families are all sorts of people bred and brought vp : and out of families are they sent into the Church and common-wealth . The first beginning of mankinde , and of his increase , was out of a family . For first did God ioyne in mariage Adam and Eue , made them husband and wife , and then gaue them children : so as husband and wife , parent and childe , ( which are parts of a family ) were before magistrate and subiect , minister and people , which are the parts of a Common-wealth , and a Church . When by the generall deluge all publike societies were destroyed , a familie , euen the family of Noah , was preserued , and out of it kingdomes and nations againe raised . That great people of the Iewes which could not be numbred for multitude , was raised out of the family of Abram . Yea euen to this day haue all sorts of people come from families , and so shall to the end of the world . Whence it followeth , that a conscionable performance of domesticall and houshold duties , tend to the good ordering of Church and common-wealth , as being meanes to fit and prepare men thereunto . Besides , a familie is a little Church , and a little common-wealth , at least a liuely representation thereof , whereby triall may be made of such as are fit for any place of authoritie , or of subiection in Church or common-wealth . Or rather it is as a schoole wherein the first principles and grounds of gouernment and subiection are learned : whereby men are fitted to greater matters in Church or common-wealth . Wherupon the f Apostle declareth , that a Bishop that cannot rule his own house , is not fit to gouerne the Church . So we may say of inferiours that cannot be subiect in a familie ; they will hardly be brought to yeeld such subiection as they ought in Church or common-wealth : instance Absolom , and Adoniah , Dauids sonnes . This is to be noted for satisfaction of certaine weake consciences , who thinke that if they haue no publike calling , they haue no calling at all ; and thereupon gather that all their time is spent without a calling . Which consequence if it were good and sound , what comfort in spending their time should most women haue , who are not admitted to any publike function in Church or common-wealth ? or seruants , children , and others who are wholly imployed in priuate affaires of the familie ? But the forenamed doctrine sheweth the vnsoundnesse of that consequence . Besides , who knoweth not that the preseruation of families tendeth to the good of Church and common-wealth ? so as a conscionable performance of houshold duties , in regard of the end and fruit thereof , may be accounted a publike worke . Yea , if domesticall duties be well and throughly performed , they will be euen enough to take vp a mans whole time . If a master of a family be also an husband of a wife , and a father of children , he shall finde worke enough : as by those particular duties , which we shall afterwards shew to belong vnto masters , husbands , and parents , may easily be proued . So a wife likwise , if she also be a mother and a mistris , and faithfully endeuour to doe what by vertue of those callings she is bound to doe , shall finde enough to doe . As for children vnder the gouernment of their parents , and seruants in a familie , their whole calling is to be obedient to their parents and masters , and to doe what they command them in the Lord. Wherefore if they who haue no publike calling , be so much the more diligent in the functions of their priuate callings , they shall be as well accepted of the Lord , as if they had publike offices . Yet many therebe , who hauing no publike imployment , thinke they may spend their time as they list , either in idlenesse , or in following their vaine pleasures and delights day after day , and so cast themselues out of all calling . Such are many masters of families who commit all the care of their house either to their wiues , or to some seruant , and mispend their whole time in idlenesse , riotousnesse , and voluptuousnesse . Such are many mistresses , who spend their time in lying a bed , attiring themselues , and goshipping . Such are many young gentlemen liuing in their fathers houses , who partly through the too-much-indulgencie and negligence of their parents , and partly through their owne headstrong affections , and rebellious will , runne without restraint whither their corrupt lusts lead them . These , and such other like to these , though by Gods prouidence they be placed in callings , in warrantable callings , and in such callings as minister vnto them matter enough of imployment , yet make themselues to be of no calling . Now what blessing can they looke for from the Lord ? The Lord vseth to giue his blessing to men , while they are busied in their callings . g Iaacobs faithfull seruice to his vncle Laban moued God to blesse him . h Iosephs faithfulnesse to his master Potiphar was had in remembrance with God , who aduanced him to be ruler in Egypt . i Moses was keeping his father in lawes sheepe when God appeared to him in the bush , and appointed him a Prince ouer his people . k Dauid was sent for from the field , where he was keeping his fathers sheepe , when he was anointed to be king ouer Israel . l Elisha was plowing when he was anointed to be a Prophet . m The shepherds were watching their sheepe , when that gladsome tidings was brought to them , that the Sauiour of the world was borne . Not to insist on any more particulars , the promise of Gods protection is restrained to our callings : for n the charge which God hath giuen to the Angels concerning man is , to keepe him in all his waies . As for those who haue publike offices in Church or n common-wealth , they may not thereupon thinke themselues exempted from all family-duties . These priuate duties are necessarie duties . Though a man be a magistrate or a minister , yet if he be an husband , or a father , or a master , he may not neglect his wife , children , and seruants . Indeed they who are freed from publike functions , are bound to attend so much the more vpon the priuate duties of their families , because they haue more leisure thereunto . But none ought wholly to neglect them . o Iosuah , who was a Captaine and Prince of his people , and very much imployed in publike affaires , yet neglected not his familie : for he professeth that he and his house would serue the Lord. It seemeth that p Eli was negligent in performing the dutie of a father , and q Dauid also . But what followed thereupon ? Two of Elies sonnes proued sacrilegious , and lewd Priests . Two of Dauids sonnes proued very ill common-wealths-men , euen plaine traitors . §. 9. Of the Apostles order in laying downe the duties of husbands and wiues in the first place . There being three especiall degrees , or orders in a familie , ( as we heard before ) the Apostle placeth husband and wife in the first ranke , and first declareth their duties , and that not without good reason : for First , The husband and wife were the first couple that euer were in the world . Adam and Eue were ioyned in mariage , and made man and wife before they had children , or seruants . So falleth it out for the most part euen to this day in erecting , or bringing together a familie : the first couple is ordinarily an husband and a wife . Secondly , most vsually the husband and his wife are the chiefest in a familie , all vnder them single persons : they gouernours of all the rest in the house . Therefore most meet it is , that they should first know their dutie , and learne to practise it , that so they may be an example to all the rest . If they faile in their dutie one to another , they giue occasion to all the rest vnder them to be carelesse , and negligent in theirs . Let an husband be churlish to his wife , and despise her , he ministreth an occasion to children and seruants to contemne her likewise , and to be disobedient vnto her : yea , to be churlish and froward one to another , especially to their vnderlings . Let a wife be vntrustie and vnfaithfull to her husband , let her filch and purloine from him , children and seruants will soone take courage , or rather boldnesse from her example priuily to steale what they can from their father , and master . Thus is their breach of dutie a double fault : one in respect of the party whom they wrong , and to whom they denie dutie : the other in respect of those to whom they giue occasion of sinning . Know therefore , O husbands and wiues , that yee , aboue all other in the familie , are most bound vnto a conscionable performance of your dutie . Greater will your condemnation be , if you faile therein . Looke to it aboue the rest : and by your example draw on your children and seruants ( if you haue any ) to performe their duties : which surely they will more readily do , when they shall behold you as guides going before them , and making conscience of your ioynt and seuerall duties . §. 10. Of the Apostles order in setting downe inferiours duties in the first place . In handling the duties of the first forenamed couple , the Apostle beginneth with wiues , and layeth downe their particular duties in the first place . The reason of this order I take to be the inferiority of the wife to her husband . I doe the rather take it so to be , because I obserue this to be his vsuall method and order , first to declare the duties of inferiours , and then of superiours : For in handling the duties of a children and parents , and of b seruants and masters , he beginneth with the inferiours , both in this , and c in other Epistles ; which order also d S. Peter obserueth : yea , e the law it selfe doth in the first place , and that expresly , mention the inferiours dutie , only implying the superiours to follow as a iust consequence , which is this , If the inferiour must giue honour , and by vertue thereof performe such duties as appertaine thereto , then must the superiour carrie himselfe worthy of honour , and by vertue thereof performe answerable duties . Quest . Why should inferiours duties be more fully expressed , and placed in the first ranke ? Answ . Surely because for the most part inferiours are most vnwilling to vndergoe the duties of their place . Who is not more ready to rule , than to be subiect ? I denie not but that it is a farre more difficult and hard matter to gouerne well than to obey well . For to rule and gouerne requireth more knowledge , experience , wisdome , care , watchfulnesse , diligence , and other like vertues , than to obey and be subiect . He that obeyeth hath his rule laid before him , which is the will and command of his superiour in things lawfull , and not against Gods will. But the superiour who commandeth , is to consider not only what is lawfull , but also what is most fit , meet , conuenient , and euery way the best : yea also he must forecast for the time to come , and so farre as he can obserue whether that which is now for the present meet enough , may not be dangerous for the time to come , and in that respect vnmeet to be vrged . Whence it followeth , that the superiour in authoritie may sinne in commanding that which the inferiour in subiection may vpon his command doe without sinne . Who can iustly charge Ioab with sinne in numbring the people , when Dauid vrged him by vertue of his authoritie so to doe ? Yet did Dauid sinne in commanding it . Without all question Saul did sin in charging the people by an oath , to eat no food the day that they pursued their enemies ( a time when they had most need to be refreshed with food , as Ionathans words implie ) and yet did not the people sinne in forbearing : witnesse the euent that followed on Ionathans eating , though he knew not his fathers charge . Who seeth not hereby , that it is a matter of much more difficultie to rule well , than to obey ? which is yet further euident by Gods wise disposing prouidence in ordering who should gouerne , who obey . Commonly the younger for age , the weaker for sex , the meaner for estate , the more ignorant for vnderstanding , with the like , are in places of subiection : but the elder , stronger , wealthier , wiser , and such like persons , are for the most part , or at least should be in place of authority . Woe to thee ô land ( f saith Salomon ) when thy king is a childe . And g Isaiah denounceth it as a curse to Israel , that children shall be their Princes , and babes shall rule ouer them , and complaineth h that women had rule ouer the people . Now to returne to the point , though it be so that gouernours haue the heauiest burden laid on their shoulders , yet inferiours that are under subiection thinke their burden the heauiest , and are lothest to beare it , and most willing to cast it away . For naturally there is in euery one much pride and ambition , which as dust cast on the eies of their vnderstanding , putteth out the sight thereof , and so maketh them affect superiority , and authority ouer others , and to be stubborne vnder the yoke of subiection : which is the cause that in all ages , both by diuine , and also by humane lawes , penalties and punishments of diuers kinds haue beene ordained , to keepe inferiours in compasse of their dutie : and yet ( such is the pride of mans heart ) all will not serue . What age , what place euer was there , which hath not iust cause to complaine of subiects rebellion , seruants stubbornnesse , childrens disobedience , wiues presumption ? Not without cause therefore doth the Apostle first declare the duties of inferiours . Besides , the Apostle would hereby teach those who are vnder authority , how to moue them that are in authority ouer them , to deale equally and kindly , not hardly and cruelly with them , namely , by endeuouring to performe their owne dutie first . For what is it that prouoketh wrath , rage , and fury in gouernours ? What maketh them that haue authority , to deale roughly , and rigorously ? is it not for the most part disobedience , and stoutnesse in those that are vnder gouernment ? though some in authority be so proud , so sauage , and inhumane , as no honour done to them , no performance of duty can satisfie and content them , but they will ( as i Dauids enemies ) reward euill for goodnesse , yet the best generall direction that can be prescribed to inferiours , to prouoke their gouernours to deale well with them , is , that inferiours themselues be carefull and conscionable in doing their duty first . If their gouernours on earth be nothing moued therewith , yet will the highest Lord in heauen graciously accept it . Lastly , men must first learne to obey well , before they can rule well : for they who scorne to be subiect to their gouernours while they are vnder authority , are like to proue intolerably insolent when they are in authority . Learne all that are vnder authority , how to win your gouernours fauour : how to make your yoke easie , and your burden light : how to preuent many mischiefes which by reason of the power of your superiours ouer you may otherwise fall vpon you : First doe ye your duty . There are many weighty reasons to moue gouernours first to begin to doe their dutie . For , First , by vertue of their authority they beare Gods image , therefore in doing their duty they honour that image . Secondly , by reason of their place they ought to goe before such as are vnder them . Thirdly , a faithfull performance of their duty , is an especiall means to keepe their inferiours in compasse of theirs . Fourthly , their failing in duty is exemplary : it causeth others vnder them to faile in theirs , and so it is a double sin . Fiftly , their reckoning shall be the greater : for of them who haue receiued more , more shall be required . It were therefore to be wished that superiours and inferiours would striue who should beginne first , and who should performe their owne part best , and in this kinde striue to excell , as runners in a race striue in running to out-strip one another . But if question be made who shall beginne , I aduise inferiours not to stand out in this strife , but to thinke the Apostle first inciteth them : and that it is the safest for them to begin : for in this contention inferiours are like to fare the worst , by reason of the power which superiours haue ouer them . And though it be more against our corrupt , proud , and stout nature , to be subiect and obey , yet let vs so much the more endeuour to yeeld duty in this kinde . For it is an especiall part of spirituall prudence , to obserue what our corrupt nature is most prone vnto , and wherein it most swelleth up , that therein we may most striue to beat it downe : nature is contrary to grace , and the k wisdome of the flesh is enmitie against God. §. 11. Of the reasons why wiues duties are first taught . Quest . Why among other inferiours are wiues first brought into the schoole of Christ to learne their duty ? Answ . Many good reasons may be giuen of the Apostles order euen in this point . First , of all other inferiours in a family , wiues are farre the most excellent , and therefore to be placed in the first ranke . Secondly , wiues were the first to whom subiection was inioyned : before there was childe or seruant in the world , it was said to her , thy desire shall be subiect to thine husband . Thirdly , wiues are the fountaine from whence all other degrees spring : and therefore ought first to be cleansed . Fourthly , this subiection is a good patterne vnto children and seruants : and a great means to moue them to be subiect . Fiftly , I may further adde as a truth , which is too manifest by experience in all places , that among all other parties of whom the Holy Ghost requireth subiection , wiues for the most part are l most back ward in yeelding subiection to their husbands . But yee wiues that feare God , be carefull of your duty : and though it may seeme somewhat contrary to the common course and practise of wiues , yet follow not a multitude to doe euill . Though it be harsh to corrupt nature , yet beat downe that corruption : yea though your husbands be backward in their duties , yet be ye forward , and striue to goe before them in yours : remembring what the Lord saith ( Mat. 5. 46 , 47. ) If you loue them which loue you , what singular thing doe ye ? Yea remembring also what the Apostle saith , ( 1 Tim. 2. 14. ) The woman was first in the transgression , m and first had her duty giuen vnto her , and n was made for the man , and not man for the woman . Thus shall ye deserue that commendation of good wiues , o Many haue done vertuously , but ye excell them all . Hauing hitherto handled the forenamed generall instructions , I will proceed to a more distinct opening of the words ; and collect such obseruations as thence arise , and then particularly declare the seuerall duties which the three orders in a family owe each to other . §. 12. Of wiues subiection . EPHES. 5. 22. Wiues submit your selues vnto your owne husbands , as vnto the Lord. THe p word by which the Apostle hath noted out the duties of wiues , is of the middle voice , and may be translated passiuely as q many haue done , or r actiuely as our English doth ( submit your selues ) and that most fitly : for there is a double subiection . 1. A necessary subiection : which is the subiection of order . 2. A Voluntary subiection : which is the subiection of duty . The necessary subiection is that degree of inferioritie , wherein God hath placed all inferiours , and whereby he hath subiected them to their superiours , that is , set them in a lower ranke . By vertue thereof , though inferiours seeke to exalt themselues aboue their superiours , yet are they subiect unto them , their ambition doth not take away that order which God hath established . A wife is in an inferiour degree , though she domineere neuer so much ouer her husband . The Uoluntary subiection , is that dutifull respect which inferiours carry towards those whom God hath set ouer them : whereby they manifest a willingnesse to yeeld to that order which God hath established . Because God hath placed them vnder their superiours , they will in all duty manifest that subiection which their place requireth . Because it is a duty which is here required , the Voluntary subiection must needs be here meant : and to expresse so much , it is thus set downe , submit your selues . Though the same word be here vsed that was in the former verse , yet it is restrained to a narrower compasse , namely to * subiection of reuerence . Here learne that to necessary subiection , must voluntary subiection be added : that is , duty must be performed according to that order and degree wherein God hath set vs. This is to make a vertue of necessity . Vnder this phrase ( submit your selues ) all the duties which a wife oweth to her husband are comprised , as I shall * afterwards more distinctly shew . §. 13. Of the persons to whom wiues must be subiect . In setting downe the parties to whom wiues owe subiection , the Apostle noteth a particle of restraint ( * owne ) and that to shew that a wife ought to haue but one husband , which is more plainly expressed in another place by the same phrase , let euery woman haue her owne husband : that is , only one proper to her selfe : so as It is vnlawfull for a wife to haue more than one husband at once . A wife must submit her selfe only to that one , proper husband , and to no other man ( as she is a wife and yeeldeth the duty of a wife ) so as the subiection of adulteresses is here excluded : and the duty required is , that A wife must yeeld a chaste , faithfull , matrimoniall subiection to her husband . Here by the way note the foolish collection of Adamites , Familists , and such like licentious libertines , who from the generall words which the Apostle vseth ( men * and women ) inferre that all women are as wiues to all men , and that there needeth not any such neere coniunction of one man with one woman . Which beastly opinion as it is contrary to the current of Scripture , and to the ancient law of mariage ( two shall be one flesh ) so also to this clause ( their owne husbands . ) The Apostle , in vsing those generall words , followed the Greeke phrase , which putteth those two words ( men women ) for husbands and wiues : so also doe other tongues , yea and our English . The particular relation , which is betwixt the persons who are meant by those two words , doth plainly shew how they are to be taken , and when they are to be restrained to man and wife . To take away that ambiguity , our English hath well translated them , husband and wife . To direct and prouoke wiues vnto their duty , the Apostle addeth this clause ( as vnto the Lord ) which is both a Rule and a Reason of wiues subiection . It directeth wiues by noting the restraint of their obedience , and the manner thereof . The restraint in that wiues ought so to obey their husbands as withall they obey the Lord ; but no further : they may not be subiect in any thing to their husbands , that cannot stand with their subiection to the Lord. The manner in that wiues ought to yeeld such a kind of subiection to their husbands , as may be approued of the Lord. Thus the Apostle himselfe expoundeth this phrase , chap. 5. vers . 5 , 6. It prouoketh wiues to submit themselues to their husbands , by noting the place of an husband , which is , to be in the Lords stead , bearing his image , and in that respect hauing a fellowship and partnership with the Lord , so as Wiues in subiecting themselues aright to their husbands are subiect to the Lord. And on the contrary side , Wiues in refusing to be subiect to their husbands , refuse to be subiect to the Lord. §. 14. How an husband is his wiues head . EPHES. 5. 23. For the husband is the head of the wife , euen as Christ is the head of the Church : and he is the Sauiour of the body . THe place of an husband intimated in the last clause of the former verse , is more plainly expressed , and fully explained in this verse . His place is expressed vnder the metaphor of an head : and amplified by his resemblance therein vnto Christ . The particle of connexion ( FOR ) sheweth that this verse is added as a reason : which may fitly be referred both to the duty it selfe : and to the manner of performing it . The metaphor of an head enforceth the duty . The amplification thereof by the resemblance that is made to Christ , enforceth the manner of performing the duty . A wife must submit her selfe to an husband , because he is her head : and she must doe it as to the Lord , because her husband is to her , as Christ is to the Church . The metaphor of an head declareth two points : 1. The dignitie of an husband . 2. The duty   1. As an head is more eminent and excellent than the body , and placed aboue it , so is an husband to his wife . 2. As an head , by the vnderstanding which is in it , gouerneth , protecteth , preserueth , prouideth for the body , so doth the husband his wife : at least he ought so to doe : for this is his office and duty : this is here noted to shew the benefit which a wife receiueth by her husband : so as two motiues are included vnder this metaphor . The first is taken from the husbands prerogatiue , whence note that Subiection must be yeelded to such as are ouer vs. For this is a maine end of the difference betweene partie and partie . To what end is the head set aboue the body , if the body be not subiect to it ? The second is taken from the benefit which a wife reapeth by her husbands superiority : and it sheweth that They who will not submit themselues to their superiours are iniurious to themselues : as the body were iniurious to it selfe , if it would not be subiect to the head . §. 15. Of the resemblance of an husband to Christ . The more to enforce the forenamed reason , the Apostle addeth the resemblance that is betwixt an husband and Christ , as this note of comparison ( * euen as ) sheweth : whence it followeth that It is as meet for a wife to submit her selfe to her husband , as for the Church to submit it selfe to Christ . This amplification is especially added for Christians . Heathens may be moued to subiect themselues to their gouernours , by the resemblance taken from a naturall body . How much more ought Christians to be moued by the resemblance taken from the mysticall body of Christ ? These words ( and he is the Sauiour of the body ) as they doe declare the office of Christ , and the benefit which the Church reapeth , so they note the end why an husband is appointed to be the head of his wife , namely that by his prouident care he may be as a sauiour to her . It is here noted rather to shew the benefit which a wife reapeth by her husband , then the dutie which he oweth : for that the Apostle declareth afterwards , vers . 25 , &c. The meaning then is , That as Christ was giuen to be an head of the Church which is his body , that he might protect it , and prouide all needfull things for it , and so be a Sauiour to it , euen so for that very end are husbands appointed to be the head of their wiues . Vpon this ground the Apostle inferreth the conclusion in the next verse . §. 16. Of the resemblance betwixt The Church to Christ . A wife to her husband . EPHES. 5. 24 Therefore as the Church is subiect to Christ , so let wiues be to their owne husbands in euery thing . THis conclusion setteth forth not only the dutie it selfe , but also another Reason , and another Rule to prouoke and direct wiues to performe their dutie : and that vnder the patterne of the Church . The reason may be thus framed , That which the Church doth to Christ , a wife must doe to her husband . But the Church is subiect to Christ . Therefore a wife must be subiect to her husband . The proposition is grounded on that resemblance which is betwixt the Church in relation to Christ , and a wife in relation to her husband : for an husband is that to his wife , which Christ is to the Church ; therefore a wife must be so to her husband , as the Church is to Christ . The rule noteth both the Manner ( f as ) and also the Extent of a wiues subiection ( * in euery thing . ) Quest . Is mortall and sinfull man to be obeyed as the Lord Christ the eternall Sonne of God ? Answ . This extent is to be restrained to the generalitie of the things in question . As in other places , where the Apostle saith , all things are lawfull for me , he meaneth all indifferent things , for of them his speech was in that place . And where againe he saith , Whatsoeuer is set before you , eat , he meaneth , whatsoeuer good and wholsome meat : for of that he spake . Thus much of the maine drift of the Apostle in setting before wiues the example of Christ , to whom husbands are like in dignitie , and the example of the Church , to whom wiues ought to be like in dutie . I will further consider these examples of Christ and the Church more distinctly by themselues , without any relation to man and wife : and out of them note such generall instructions as concerne all Christians . §. 17. Of the relation betwixt Christ and the Church . EPHES. 5. 23 , 24. 23. Christ is the head of the Church : and he is the Sauiour of the body . 24. The Church is subiect vnto Christ in euery thing . BEhold here the mutuall relation betwixt Christ , the Church .   Wherein note concerning Christ , 1. His preheminence ouer the Church , ( he is her head . ) 2. His goodnesse to her , ( he is her Sauiour . ) Note also concerning the Church , 1. Her prerogatiue , ( she is the body of Christ . ) 2. Her dutie . In laying downe whereof there is noted , 1. Wherin it consisteth ( The Church is subiect to Christ ) 2. How farre it extendeth , ( in euery thing . ) The title Head , is giuen to Christ in two respects . 1. In regard of his t dignitie and dominion ouer the Church . 2. In regard of the u neere vnion betwixt him and the Church . This vnion is more fully expressed afterwards , vers . 30. The dignitie of Christ is here principally intended : so as Christ is the highest in authoritie ouer the Church : the titles d Lord , e Father , Master , Doctor , f Prophet , g First-borne , with the like , being by a kinde of excellencie and proprietie attributed to him , proue as much . The causes hereof are 1. The good pleasure of God his Father . 2. The dignitie of his person being God-Man . 3. The merit of his sacrifice whereby he hath redeemed and purchased his Church vnto himselfe . 4. The omnipotencie of his power whereby he is able to protect it . 5. The all-sufficiencie of spirit , whereby he is able to giue to euery member all needfull grace . Till the Pope of Rome can shew so good reason for this title ( Supreme head of the whole Church ) we will account him a blasphemous vsurper thereof . Object . He is not accounted an Imperiall head as Christ is , but only a Ministeriall head . Answ . 1. This distinction is without all ground or warrant of Scripture . 2. It implieth plaine contradiction . For to be a ministeriall head , is to be an head and a minister , which is all one as an head and a member in relation to the same thing . 3. Though in these two words ( Imperiall , Ministeriall ) they may seeme to aduance Christ aboue the Pope , yet in their owne interpretation of these words they make the Pope equall to Christ , if not aduance him aboue Christ . For they say that Christ is an imperiall head to quicken the Church inwardly : and the Pope a ministeriall head to gouerne it outwardly . First let it be noted , how little congruitie this exposition hath with the words expounded . Doth this word ( imperiall ) intimate a quickning vertue ? Doth this word ( ministeriall ) implie a gouerning power ? Nay , is there not great incongruitie in this , that Christ should be the Imperiall head , and yet the Pope an head to gouerne ? Besides , doth not this rend asunder two of Christs offices , and leauing one to Christ , giue another to the Pope , and so make him equall with Christ ? If the particular branches of this gouernment which is giuen by papists vnto the Pope by vertue of his headship be obserued , we shall finde that to be verified in him , which the Apostle hath foretold concerning Antichrist , that as God he sitteth in the temple of God , shewing himselfe that he is God. For they giue to him the keyes of heauen and hell , to shut or open the one or other as pleaseth him : they giue him power to dispense with Gods lawes , to coine articles of faith , to make lawes to binde mens consciences directly and immediatly , to giue pardon for sinne , to free subiects from allegeance to their Soueraignes , to canonize Saints , and what not ? But to let these impious blaspliemies passe , beside that this prerogatiue of Christ ( to be head of the Church ) is incommunicable ( for thereby the Apostle proueth Christ to be aduanced farre aboue all principalitie , and power , and might , and dominion , and every name , &c. ) Christ needeth not for the execution of his office therein any Vicar , or Deputie : for as head he filleth all in all things : and by his eternall spirit is he in heauen , earth , and euery place where any of his members are , according to his * promises made vnto his Church . Much comfort and great confidence must this needs minister to all such as haue assurance that they are of this bodie : for hauing so mightie , so wise , so mercifull an head , an head so sufficient euery way , who can instruct , direct , guide , gouerne , protect , and helpe them in all their needs whatsoeuer , what need they feare ? When we are assaulted by Satan , or any way set vpon by any of his instruments , or are in any distresse or need , let vs lift vp the eies of our faith higher then we can the eies of our bodie , and in heauen behold this our head , who is inuisible , and we cannot but receiue from thence much comfort , and incouragement . §. 18. Of the benefit of Christs headship . The Goodnesse of Christ is set downe in these words ( and he is the Sauiour of the bodie ) Euery word almost hath his emphasis . 1. The copulatiue particle ( AND ) sheweth that The goodnesse which Christ doth for his Church , he doth because he is the head thereof . O how happie a thing is it for the Church that it hath such an head ! an head that doth not tyrannize ouer it , nor trample it vnder foot : an head that doth not pole , or peele the Church : but procureth peace and safetie to it . When Naomi sought to make a match betwixt Boaz and Ruth , that he might be her head , what saith she ? Shall I not seeke rest for thee that it may be well with thee ? It is therefore the office of an head to be a Sauiour , to procure rest and prosperitie to the bodie whose head it is . Happie were it for Kingdomes , Common-wealths , Cities , Churches , Families , wiues , and all that haue heads , if they were such heads : that , because they are heads , they would endeuour to be Sauiours . §. 19. Of Christ a sufficient Sauiour . In laying forth the goodnesse of Christ three things are noted . 1. The Kinde of goodnesse , which is Saluation ( the Sauiour ) 2. The person that performeth it ( he himselfe . ) 3. The parties for whom he performeth it ( the body . ) 1. The Greeke word translated * Sauiour is so emphaticall that other tongues can hardly finde a fit word to expresse the emphasis thereof : it being attributed to Christ , implieth that Christ is a most absolute and perfect Sauiour , he is euery way a sufficient Sauiour : * able perfectly to saue euen to the very vttermost . He saueth Soule and Body : he saueth from all manner of miserie : which is intimated by that particular from which he saueth , namely sinne : he shall saue his people from their sinnes . Sinne is the greatest , and most grieuous euill ; yea , the cause of all miserie : they who are saued from it , are saued from all euill : for there is nothing hurtfull to man , but that which is caused by sinne , or poisoned by it . Before sinne seazed on man he was most happie , free from all miserie : and so shall he be after the contagion , guilt , punishment , dominion , and remainder of sinne is remoued . But he that remaineth in the bondage of sinne is in a most wofull plight . In that Christ saueth from sinne , he saueth from the wrath of God , the curse of the law , the venome of all outward crosses , the tyranie of Satan , the sting of Death , the power of the graue , the torments of hell , and what not ? The puritie of Christs nature , and excellencie of his person is it that maketh him so sufficient a Sauiour : which reason the Apostle himselfe noteth : for where he saith that Christ is able to saue to the vttermost , he addeth , for proofe thereof , that he is Holy , harmlesse , vndefiled , separate from sinners , and made higher then the heauens . Great matter of reioycing , and of confidence doth this minister vnto vs. When the Angell first brought this newes , To you is borne a Sauiour , he saith , Behold I bring you good tidings of great ioy . This made the Virgin Mary say , My spirit hath reioyced in God my Sauiour , and for this did Zacharias blesse God that redeemed his people , and raised vp an horne of saluation . When the eies of old Simeon had seene this Saluation , he desired no longer to liue , but said , Lord now lettest thou thy seruant depart in peace . They who beleeue in this Sauiour will be of like minde : and as they reioyce in him , so they will trust vnto him , and say with the Apostle , we are more then conquerors through him that loued vs , &c. This being so , to what end serueth the supposed treasure of the Church , wherein are said to be stored vp indulgences , pardons , merits , workes of supererogation , and I know not what trash , to adde to the satisfaction of this Sauiour ? either Christ is not a sufficient Sauiour , or these are ( to speake the least ) vaine . But vaine they are : & an emptie , filthie , detestable treasure that is , which God will destroy with all that trust therein . §. 20. Of Christ the only Sauiour . This relatiue particle ( * HEE ) hath also his emphasis ; for as it pointeth out Christ the head of the Church , so it restraineth this great worke to him : it may thus be translated , he himselfe : that is , he in his owne person , he by himselfe , he and none but he . So as to speak properly , Christ is the only Sauiour of men : in which respect he is called b the horne of saluation , yea c Saluation it selfe : which titles are giuen to him by an excellency and propriety : and in the same respect the name d Iesus was giuen vnto him . Here by the way note the blasphemous arrogancie of those great sectaries among the Papists , who stile themselues Iesuits : assuming that name which is proper to this great office of Iesus Christ . Obiect . Why is this name more blasphemous , then the title Christians ? Answ . One of their owne religion doth thus resolue that Obiection : We are called Christians of Christ , not Iesuits of Iesus , because we partake of the thing signified by the name Christ , that is anointing : for ( as the Apostle saith ) we all receiue of his fulnesse . But he hath not communicated to vs the thing signified by the name Iesus ; for it belongeth to him alone to saue , as saith the scripture , he shall saue his people : as if he should say , he alone , and no other . A Christo dicimur Christiani , non autem à Iesu Iesuani , seu Iesuitae : quia rem signatam nomine Christus , scil . vnctionem nobis communicauit . Nam , ut ait Apostolus , omnes nos de plenitudine eius accepimus : sed rem significatam nomine Iesus non communicauit : nam saluare ipsi soli conuenit : ipse enim ( vt dicitur in scriptura ) saluum faciet populum suum : ac si diceret , ipse solus , & non alius . Guil. Lindwood in Prouinc . siue Constitut . Angl. lib. de Consuetud . But to returne to our matter , Saint Peter doth most plainly and fully proue the forenamed doctrine in these words spoken of Iesus Christ , e There is not saluation in any other : for there is none other name vnder heauen giuen among men whereby we must be saued . None is able , f none is worthy to worke so great a worke : he must doe it , or it can not be done . But g he is so able , and so worthy as he can doe it of himselfe , and needeth none to assist him . What a dotage is it to trust to other Sauiours ? Legions of Sauiours haue Papists to whom they flie in their need . All the Angels in heauen , and all , whom at any time their Popes haue canonized for Saints ( which are many millions ) are made Sauiours by them . h Be astonished , O ye heauens , at this : for they haue committed two euils : they haue forsaken Christ the fountaine of liuing waters , and hewed them out cisternes , broken cisterns that can hold no water . Let vs for our parts flie vnto this Sauiour only , and wholly rely vpon him , as we desire to be saued . Thus shall we honour him by preferring him before all : yea by reiecting all but him : and thus shall we be sure to bring helpe , ease and comfort to our owne soules . §. 21. Of the Church the body of Christ . The persons who receiue any benefit by this Sauiour , are all comprised vnder this metaphor the bodie : whereby the samething is meant that was meant before by the Church . Church according to the notation of the Greeke word signifieth an assembly called together . It is in Scripture by a propriety attributed to them who are called to God. This calling is twofold : 1. Outward , which is common to all that make profession of the Gospell : in this respect it is said , many are called and few chosen . 2. Inward , which is proper to the elect , none but they , and all they in their time shall both outwardly be called by the word to a profession of Christ , and also inwardly and effectually by the spirit to beleeue in Christ , and obey his Gospell . This is stiled b an heauenly calling , which is c proper to the Saints . These make that Church , whereof Christ is properly the head : and therefore in relation to that metaphor of an head , they are called the Bodie : and that in these respects ; 1. They are vnder Christ , as a body vnder the head . 2. They receiue spirituall life and grace from Christ , as a body naturall receiueth sense , and vigour from the head . 3. Christ gouerneth them , as an head the body . 4. They are subiect to Christ , as a body to the head . §. 22. Of the extent of Christs goodnesse to all his body . This metaphor , by which the persons that reape the benefit of Christs office are set forth , noteth two points . 1. All that are once incorporated into Christ shall be saued . The bodie compriseth all the parts and members vnder it : not only armes , shoulders , breast , backe , and such like : but also hands , fingers , feet , toes , and all . Christ their head being their Sauiour , who can doubt of their saluation ? 2. None but those that are incorporated into Christ shall be saued . For this priuiledge is appropriated to the bodie . The former point is clearely set forth by a resemblance , which the Apostle maketh betwixt Adam and Christ , thus : As by the offence of one , iudgement came on all men to condemnation , euen so by the righteousnesse of one , the free gift came on all men vnto iustification of life . Here are noted two roots , one is Adam , the other is Christ : both of them haue their number of branches , to all which they conuey that which is in them , as the root conueyeth the sap that is in it , into all the branches that sprout from it . The first root , which is Adam , conueyeth sinne and death to all that come from him : and the other root , which is Christ , conueyeth grace and life to euerie one that is giuen to him : for saith he , All that the Father giueth me , shall come to me : and him that commeth to me , I will in no wise cast out : and a little after , he rendreth this reason , This is the Fathers will , that of all which he hath giuen me I should lose nothing , but should raise it vp againe at the last day . Obiect . Christ himselfe maketh exception of one , where he saith , none is lost but the sonne of perdition . Answ . That phrase sonne of perdition , sheweth that Iudas was neuer of this body : for can we imagine that Christ is a Sauiour of a sonne of perdition ? Obiect . Why is he then excepted ? Answ . By reason of his office and calling he seemed to be of this body , and till he was made knowne , none could otherwise iudge of him , in which respect Saint Peter saith , he was numbred with vs. 2. Answ . Christ there speaketh in particular of the twelue Apostles , and to be an Apostle of Christ was in it selfe but an outward calling . This is a point of admirable comfort to such as haue assurance of their incorporation into Christ , they may rest vpon the benefit of this office of Christ , that he is a Sauiour . We need not thinke of climing vp to heauen , and searching Gods records to see if our names be written in the booke of Life . Let vs only make triall whether we be of this body or no. For our helpe herein , know we that this metaphor of a body implieth two things . 1. A mysticall vnion with Christ . 2. A spirituall communion with the Saints . 1. By vertue of that vnion they who are of Christs body , 1. m Receiue grace , and life from him . 2. n Are guided and gouerned according to his will. 3. o Seeke to honour him in all things they doe . 4. p Are offended and grieued when he is dishonoured by others . 2. By reason of their communion with the Saints being fellow members , 1. q They loue the brethren . 2. r They are ready to succour such as are in distresse . 3. ſ They will edifie one another . 4. t They retaine a mutuall sympathy : reioycing , and mourning one with another . §. 23. Of the restraint of the benefit of Christs headship to them only that are of his body . That none but those who are of Christs body , shall partake of the benefit of his office , is cleare by other like titles of restraint , as u his people , and x his sheepe : but especially by denying to the world the benefit of his intercession . y I pray not for the world , saith he . In this respect this position ( out of the Church no saluation ) is without exception true : for the body is the true , Catholike , inuisible Church : he that is not a member of this Church , but is out of it , hath not Christ to be his head and Sauiour , whence then can he haue saluation ? The former point is not more comfortable to those that haue assurance that they are members of this body , then this is terrible to those that giue too great euidence they are no members thereof ; as all they doe that haue not the spirit of Christ ruling in them , but rather rebell against him : and beare no loue to the Saints , but rather hate them , and doe them all the spight they can . §. 24. Of the Churches subiection to Christ . EPHES. 5. 24. The Church is subiect vnto Christ in euery thing . THe duty which the Church in way of thankfulnesse performeth to Christ her head for this great benefit , that he is her Sauiour , is Subiection : Vnder which word is comprised all that obedience and duty , which in any kinde Christ requireth of the Church , in and by the word . Quest . Is it possible for that part of the Church which is here on earth , to yeeld such obedience ? Answ . It will faithfully endeuour to doe what it can : and that honest and vtmost endeuour Christ graciously accepteth for a perfect performance of all . In that it is here taken for grant , that the Church is subiect to Christ ; I may , as from a generall to particular , infer that Whosoeuer is of the true Catholike Church is subiect to Christ , and yeeldeth obedience to his word . We will runne after thee , saith the Church to Christ . My sheepe heare my voice and follow me , saith Christ of that flocke , which is his Church . For Christ conueyeth his owne spirit into his mysticall body the Church , and into every member thereof : which spirit is much more operatiue , and liuely then the soule of man. If therefore mans soule quickning euery part of the naturall body , make them subiect to the head , much more will the spirit of Christ bring the members of his mysticall body in subiection to himselfe . If the spirit of him that raised vp Iesus from the dead dwell in you , he that raised vp Christ from the dead , shall also quicken your mortall bodies , by the spirit that dwelleth in you . Hereby let triall be made of particular visible Churches and of particular persons , whether they are in deed of this true Catholike Church or no. Those visible Churches which refuse to be gouerned by Christs word , and are wholly gouerned by humane traditions , which rise against Christ and play the adulteresses by committing Idolatry , are not of this Catholike Church which is subiect to Christ . No more are Infidels that defie Christ , Heretiques that deny him , ignorant persons that know not his will , profane persons that despise him , wordlings that lightly esteeme him , nor any that persecute or scorne him in his members . By this we may see that many haue a name that they are of the Church , who in deed are not . Obiect . Many such persons may belong to Gods election , and so be of that body whereof Christ is a Sauiour . Answ . Election in deed giueth them a title to Christ , but they cannot reape any benefit by that title till they haue a possession of Christ by vertue of their spirituall vnion with him . Neither can they haue any assurance of their election , till they finde by the quickning vertue of the spirit , that they are vnited vnto Christ . Wherefore so long as men remaine destitute of the Spirit of Christ , and are possessed with a contrary spirit , they may well be iudged for the present to be none of this body , nor to haue any part in Christ , their future estate being referred to him who only knoweth what it shall be . §. 25. Of the extent of the Churches subiection . The extent of the Churches subiection to Christ is without any restraint at all , in every thing . For there is nothing which Christ requireth of her , but she may with a good conscience , and must in obedience yeeld unto . Iust , and pure , and perfect are all his commandements , there is no error in any of them : no mischiefe or inconuenience can follow vpon the keeping of them . This extent being here taken for grant , I may further inferre that They who are of the true Catholike Church will yeeld vniuersall obedience to Christ : they will obey him in all and euery of his commandements . Dauid turned not aside from any thing that the Lord commanded him . Iosiah turned to the Lord with all his heart according to all the law : and Zacharias , and Elizabeth , walked in all the commandements of God. All these were of this Church : and of their minde are all others that are of this Church . For the spirit of Christ which is in them worketh a thorow reformation : euen as the flesh leadeth a naturall man on to euery sinne , so the spirit of Christ stirreth him vp to euery good duty . In which respect it is said , that whosoeuer is borne of God doth not commit sinne . Obiect . The best Saints in all ages haue transgressed in many things . Answ . Their sinnes though grieuous , haue not wilfully in open rebellion against Christ beene committed , but they haue slipped from them partly through their owne weaknesse , and partly through the violence of some temptation . So as that which the Apostle saith of himselfe , may be applied to all that are of the body of Christ , That which I doe I allow not : Now then is it no more I that doe it , but the sinne that dwelleth in me . This extent is a good proofe of the truth of subiection , for herein lieth a maine difference betwixt the vpright , and the hypocrite ; yea betwixt restraining and renewing grace . That restraining grace which is in many hypocrites stirreth them to doe many things which Christ commandeth , if at least they crosse not their honour , profit , ease , and the like . Herod that notorious hypocrite did many things . None that beareth the name of the Church , but will be subiect in somethings . But none but the vpright , who are indeed renewed by the sanctifying spirit of Christ , will in all things make Christs will their rule , and in euery thing hold close to it , preferring it before their pleasure , profit , preferment , or any other outward allurement . They who so doe , giue good euidence that they are of the body of Christ , and may rest vpon it , that Christ is their Sauiour . §. 26. Of the summe of Husbands duties . EPHES. 5. 25. 25. Husbands loue your Wiues , euen as Christ also loued the Church , and gaue himselfe for it . FRom Wiues duties the Apostle proceedeth to presse Husbands duties . And as he propounded to Wiues for a patterne , the example of the Church , so to Husbands he propoundeth the example of Christ : and * addeth thereunto the patterne of a mans selfe , in regard of that naturall affection which he beareth to his body . Thus he addeth patterne to patterne , and doth the more largely and earnestly presse them , because husbands hauing a more honourable place , their failing in duty is the more hainous , scandalous , and dangerous . The Apostle restraineth the duties of Husbands to their * owne Wiues , as he did the duties of Wiues to their “ owne Husbands . For though the same word be not here vsed which was before , yet a word of like emphasis is vsed : and as good reason there is that our English translators should haue put in this particle ( owne ) in this verse , as in the 22. verse , for proofe whereof read 1 Cor. 7. 2. Where * these two words are vsed , and both of them translated owne . This I haue the rather noted , because many who hold that a Wife must haue but one Husband , conceit that a Husband may haue more Wiues then one : which conceit this particle ( owne ) wipeth away . All the duties of an Husband are comprised vnder this one word * Loue. Wherein that an Husband might be the better directed , and whereto that he might be the rather prouoked , the forenamed example of Christ , and of his loue to the Church , is very liuely set forth : first generally in these words , euen as Christ loued the Church : and then more particularly in the words following . §. 27. Of the example of Christs loue . The note of comparison ( * Euen as ) requireth no equality , as if it were possible for an Husband in that measure to loue his wife , as Christ loued his Church ; ( for as Christ in excellency and greatnesse exceedeth man , so in loue and tendernesse ) But it noteth an equity , and like quality . An equitie , because there is as great reason that Husbands by vertue of their place should loue their Wiues , as that Christ by vertue of his place should loue the Church . A like quality , because the loue which Christ beareth to the Church is euery way without exception : and a loue which turneth to the good and benefit of the Church . Hence note two points . 1. Husbands must come as neare as they can to Christ in louing their wiues . In which respect , because they can neuer loue so much as Christ did , they must neuer thinke they haue loued enough . 2. Though their loue in measure cannot equall Christs loue , yet in the manner thereof it must be like Christs , a preuenting , true , free , pure , exceeding , constant loue . The measure and manner of Christs loue is distinctly noted , Treat . 4. § . 61. &c. and the loue which an husband oweth his wife paralleld & applied therto , which application may be also made of that Christian mutuall loue which we owe one to another . The loue of Christ to the Church is amplified , 1. By an Effect thereof , in these words , He gaue himselfe for it . 2. By the End of that effect , largely set downe , verse 26 , 27. The effect is noted partly as a Confirmation of the truth of Christs loue . Declaration of the measure     The Act ( he gaue ) sheweth that his loue was in deed and truth : not only in shew and pretence . The Object ( himselfe ) sheweth that he loued his Church more then his owne life . A greater euidence of loue could not be giuen : for greater loue hath no man then this , that a man lay downe his life for his friend . The end of Christs loue ( set forth vers . 26 , 27. ) is noted to shew that he so loued his Church for her good and happinesse , rather then for any aduantage to himselfe . As this example of Christs loue to his Church is set before husbands : so it may and ought also to be applied to all Christians : and that in a double respect . 1. As a motiue to stirre them vp to loue both Christ himselfe , and also their brethren . 2. As a patterne to teach them how to loue . A motiue it is to loue Christ , because loue deserueth loue : especially such a loue , of such a person as the loue of Christ is . Yea , our loue of Christ is an euidence that we are loued of Christ , as smoake is a signe of fire . Wherefore both in thankfulnesse to Christ , for his loue to vs , and for assurance to our owne soules of Christs loue to vs , we ought in all things that we can to testifie our loue to Christ . A motiue it is also to loue our brethren , because Christ being in heauen , our b goodnesse extendeth not to him : but our brethren on earth stand in his stead , and the loue we shew to them , we shew to him ; and he accepteth it as done to him : c Ye fed me , yee visited me , saith Christ to them that fed and visited his brethren . This loue also , euen the d loue of our brethren , is an euidence that we are loued of God. Wherefore e if Christ so loued vs , we ought also to loue one another . How the loue of Christ is a patterne , I will * afterwards shew . §. 28. Of Christs giuing himselfe . EPHES. 5. 25. And gaue himselfe for it . THis fruit and effect of Christs loue extendeth it selfe to all the things that Christ did or suffered for our redemption : as , that he descended from heauen , tooke vpon him our nature , and became a man ; that he subiected himselfe to the law , and perfectly fulfilled it ; that he made himselfe subiect to many temptations of the deuill and his instruments ; that he tooke vpon him our infirmities ; that he became a King to gouerne vs , a Prophet to instruct vs , a Priest to make an attonement for vs : that he subiected himselfe to death , the cursed death of the crosse , and so made himselfe an oblation & sacrifice for our sins ; that he was buried ; that he rose againe ; that he ascended into heauen , and there sitteth at Gods right hand to make intercession for vs. For after that Christ had taken vpon him to be our head and Sauiour , he wholly set himselfe apart for our vse , and our benefit : so as his person , his offices , his actions , his sufferings , his humiliation , his exaltation , the dignitie , the puritie , the efficacie of all is the Churches , and to her good doe they all tend . This in generall is the extent of this fruit of Christs loue , he gaue himselfe for it . More particularly , we may note these three points : 1. The action , what he did , ( he gaue . ) 2. The obiect , what he gaue , ( himselfe . ) 3. The end , why he gaue himselfe , ( for it ) for the Churches good . The action hauing relation to the obiect , most especially pointeth at the death of Christ . The * Greeke word is a compound word , and signifieth to giue vp . It implieth two things , 1. That Christ willingly died : the simple word ( gaue ) intimateth so much . 2. That his death was an oblation : that is , a price of redemption , or a satisfaction : the compound word ( gaue vp ) intimateth so much . §. 29. Of the willingnesse of Christ to die . That Christ willingly died is euident by the circumstances noted about his death : when Peter counselled him to spare himselfe , and not to goe to Ierusalem ( where he was to be put to death ) b he called him Satan , and said , he was an offence to him : when Iudas went out to betray him , c he said vnto him , That thou doest , doe quickly : d When Iudas was gone out to get companie to apprehend him , he went to the place where he was wont , so as Iudas might readily finde him ; yea , he met them in the mid-way that came to take him ; and he asked them whom they sought , though he knew whom they sought : and when they said , Iesus of Nazaret , he answered , I am he : When they came to him , he droue them all backward with a word of his mouth , and yet would not escape from them : e He could haue praied to the Father to haue had more then twelue legions of Angels for his safeguard against those that apprehended him , but would not : f when by his aduersaries he was prouoked to haue come downe from the Crosse , and could haue done so , he would not . a At the instant of giuing vp the ghost , he cried with a loud voice : which sheweth that his life was not then spent , he might haue retained it longer if he would : and thereupon the Centurion gathered that he was the Sonne of God. h When he was actually dead , and laid in a graue , he rose againe . These & other like circumstances verifie that which Christ said of himselfe , i No man taketh my life from me , but I lay it downe of my selfe . It was therefore no necessitie that compelled him to die , but his voluntarie obedience . Christ is k the Lord , Prince and Author of life , and hath an absolute power as ouer the life of others , so ouer his owne life . Thus then we see that his sacrifice was a voluntarie and free gift : the cause thereof was his owne will and good pleasure . Exceedingly doth this commend the loue of Christ : and assureth vs that it is the more acceptable to God , who loueth a cheerefull giuer . Let vs in imitation of our head , doe the things whereunto we are called willingly and cheerefully , though they seeme neuer so disgracefull to the world , or grieuous to our weake flesh . §. 30. Of the kinde of Christs death , an oblation . That Christs death was an oblation , and a price of redemption , is euident by the death of those beasts which were offered vp for a sacrifice , and therein were a type of Christs death . But expresly is this noted by this Apostle , where he saith , l Christ hath giuen himselfe for vs , an offering and sacrifice to God for a sweet smelling sauour : and againe , m Christ gaue himselfe a ransome . The phrases of n redeeming , o purchaesing , p buying , with the like , attributed to Christ and his bloud , doe further confirme the same . Learne hereby to consider Christs death , not as the death of a priuate man , but of a publike person , of a suertie , of a pledge , that in our roome and stead q was made sinne , and r was made a curse to redeeme vs from our sinnes , and from the curse which by sinne was fallen vpon vs. The comfort and benefit of Christs death is lost , if this be not knowne and beleeued . In this consisteth a maine difference betwixt the death of Christ , and all other men , not the most righteous Martyrs excepted . Their death was but a dutie , and debt : no satisfactory oblation , no price , no ransome , as Christs was . §. 31. Of the infinite valew of the prince of our redemption . The Obiect , or thing which Christ gaue for a ransome was himselfe , not his body alone , nor his body and soule only , but his person consisting of his two natures , humane , and diuine . Quest . How could his diuine nature be giuen vp ? could it suffer ? could it die ? Answ . 1. The Deitie simply considered in and by it selfe , could not die : but that person which was God , both could and did die . For the Sonne of God assuming an humane nature into the vnity of his diuine nature , and vniting them together * without confusion , alteration , distraction , separation , in one person , that which is done by one nature is done by the person , and in that respect the Scripture oft attributeth it to the other nature : as where it is said , s They crucified the Lord of glorie : and t God purchased the Churchwith his owne bloud . 2. Though the diuine nature of Christ suffered not , yet did it support the humane nature , and adde dignity , worth and efficacie to the sufferings of that nature . 3. Christs diuine nature had proper and peculiar workes in the worke of redemption , as to sanctifie his humane nature , to take away our sinnes , to reconcile vs to God , and the like . Thus then in three respects the whole person of Christ was giuen vnto vs. 1. In regard of the inseparable vnion of both natures . 2. In regard of the assistance of the Deity in those things which the humane nature of Christ did . 3. In regard of some proper actions appertaining to the Deity . In that the person of Christ God-Man was giuen vp , I gather that The price of our Redemption is of infinite value . Nor Christ , nor God himselfe could giue a greater . Heauen and earth and all things in them are not of like worth . Well therefore might Saint Peter call it pretious bloud : and prefer it before siluer , gold , and all other things of price . 1. What place can be left for despaire in those that know and beleeue the worth of this ransome ? 2. What can be held too deare for him , that notwithstanding the infinite excellency of his person gaue himselfe for vs ? can goods , can friends , can children , can liberty , can life , can any thing else ? 3. What iust cause haue we to giue vp our selues a liuing sacrifice , holy and acceptable to him that gaue himselfe for vs ? 4. How vngratefull , how vnworthy of Christ are they , that for his sake will not forsake their vnstable honours , fading wealth , vaine pleasures , garish attire , and such like trash ? §. 32. Of Christs seeking the good of the Church . The End why Christ gaue himselfe was , for the Church : so as Christ in his death aimed at our good . b He was made sinne for vs , that we might be made the righteousnesse of God in him : c he was made a curse for vs , and hath redeemed vs from the curse of the Law : d he gaue himselfe for our sinnes , that he might deliuer vs : e he laid downe his life for the sheepe . This proues Christs giuing of himselfe to be a fruit of his loue : for f Loue seeketh not her owne . Learne we hereby to apply all that Christ did to our selues . If for vs he gaue himself , he , and * all appertaining to him is ours . Learne we also hereby how to manifest loue : namely by seeking , and procuring the good of others . Let no man seeke his owne , but euery man anothers wealth . If this were practised , would there be such oppressing , such vndermining , such deceiuing , such wronging of one another as there is ? Too truly is the Apostles complaint verified in our daies , All seeke their owne . But let that minde be in vs which was in Christ Iesus , and thus manifest our loue , as we desire to partake of this fruit of Christs loue . From hence by iust consequence it followeth that Christ merited not for himselfe . Was there any need that Christ should come downe from heauen on earth , to purchase any thing for himselfe ? When he was going out of the world , thus he praied , Now , O Father , glorifie thou me with the glorie which I had with thee before the world was . Did Christ by any thing which he did on earth merit that glorie which he had before the world was ? All the exaltation whereunto he was aduanced euen in his human nature , was due to the dignity of his person . 1. Obiect . He endured the crosse , for the ioy which was set before him . Answ . He vsed that ioy which of right was due to him as an helpe to support him in the weaknesse of his humane nature , not as a recompence which he should deserue . 2. Obiect . He became obedient to the death of the Crosse , WHEREFORE God also hath highly exalted him . Answ . That particle ( wherefore ) doth not declare the cause , but the order of his exaltation : nothing a consequence that followed after his death . After he had humbled himselfe so low , he was most highly aduanced . 3. Obiect . Christ being man was bound to the Law : and therefore for himselfe he ought to fulfill it . Answ . If he had beene meere man , that were true . But he vniting his humane nature vnto his diuine , and making of both one person , which person was God as well as man , he was bound to nothing further then it pleased him voluntarily to subiect himselfe vnto for our sakes . 2. If Christ were bound to the Law , of dutie he must haue fulfilled it : and if of dutie he was to fulfill it , how could he thereby merit so high a degree of honour as he is aduanced vnto ? This conceit of Christs meriting for himselfe , doth much extenuate the glorie of Christs grace and goodnesse in giuing himselfe . §. 33. Of the particular ends , why Christ gaue himselfe , and of the condition of the Church before Christ tooke her . EPHES. 5. 26. That he might sanctifie it , and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word . THe generall End of Christs giuing himselfe being before intimated in this phrase ( for vs ) is in this and the next verse particularly exemplified : and that in two branches . One respecteth the estate of the Church in this world , v. 26. The other respecteth her estate in the world to come , v. 27. The latter of these two is the most principall . The former is subordinate to the latter , an end for the accomplishing of the other end , for the Church is here made pure , that hereafter it may be made glorious . In laying downe the former he noteth 1. The end whereat Christ aimed . 2. The meanes , wherby he effected that which he aimed at . That end is set forth in these words , that he might sanctifie it , * hauing cleansed it ( thus may they word for word be translated ) so as that which for order of words is in the latter place , for order of matter is in the first place . The word ( cleansing ) pointeth out our instification . The word ( sanctifying ) expresseth our sanctification . The meanes of effecting these , are two . 1. Baptisme comprised vnder this phrase , washing of water . 2. The word . The two branches of the former end , namely Cleansing and Sanctifying doe in generall imply two things . 1. The Condition of the Church in it selfe . 2. The Alteration thereof by Christ . The condition is presupposed , which is , that she was impure , polluted , in the common estate of corrupt man. Things in themselues pure , are not cleansed , but things foule and impure : persons of themselues freed , and exempted from a common misery , need not anothers helpe to free and exempt them . Seeing then that the Church stood in need to be cleansed , and sanctified , surely The Church in herselfe was , as the world , polluted . Very liuely is this set forth by the Prophet Ezekiel vnder the similitude of a wretched infant borne of a cursed parentage , whose nauell was not cut , who was not washed , salted , nor swadled , but cast out in the open field , polluted with bloud . Oft doth the Apostle , setting forth the wretched estate of the world , note of the true members of the Church , that c we our selues also were such . The Church consisteth of none other then of such as came out of Adams loines . Now as all the brood which commeth from vipers , adders , toads , spiders , and other like venomous dams , are infected with poison , so all the sonnes of Adam are polluted with sinne . That which is borne of the flesh ( as is euery mothers childe , not the members of the Church excepted : for they haue fathers and mothers of their flesh ) is flesh ; that is , polluted and corrupt . Therefore when we are taken into the Church , we are borne againe . This our former estate by nature is oft and seriously to be thought of , and that in respect of Christ . Our selues .   Others .   1. In regard of Christ , the more to magnifie his loue . Our former estate , before he cast the wings of his mercy vpon vs , sheweth our vnworthinesse , our vilenesse , and wretchednesse , and in that respect it openeth our heart and mouth to thinke and say , e O Lord our Lord , what is man that thou art mindfull of him , and the sonne of man that thou visitest him ! f Lord , how is it that thou wilt manifest thy selfe vnto vs , and not vnto the world ! The right knowledge of our former estate , and a due consideration thereof , maketh vs ascribe all the glory of our present dignity , and happinesse , to Christ that altered our estate , as Saint Paul , h I thanke Christ Iesus our Lord who hath enabled mee , who was before a blasphemer , &c. yea it maketh vs the more to prize and esteeme the present estate , as i Dauid . 2. In regard of our selues this is to be thought of , to humble vs , and to keepe vs from insolent boasting in those priuiledges whereof through Christ we are made partakers . To this purpose doth the Apostle thus presse this point , Who maketh thee to differ from another ? and what hast thou that thou diddest not receiue ? Now if thou diddest receiue it , why doest thou glory as if thou hadst not receiued it ? When a man is exalted from a meane , to a great place , and thereupon waxeth proud and insolent , we say , he hath forgotten from whence he came . So as remembrance of our former condition is a meanes to preserue humility , and to suppresse insolencie . 3. In regard of others it is to be thought of , to moue vs the more to commiserate their wofull estate , who yet remaine as we once were ; to conceiue hope that their estate may be altered as well as ours was ; to pray and vse what meanes we can that it may be altered . To prouoke Christians to shew all meekenesse to them which were without , the Apostle renders this reason , for we our selues also in times past were foolish , & c.. read how forcibly this is vrged , Rom. 11. 18 , 19 , &c. §. 34. Of Christs preuenting Grace . In setting downe the alteration of the forenamed condition note 1. The manner of laying it forth . 2. The matter or substance thereof . The manner is implied in this coniunction * THAT ( That he might sanctifie it ) Christ loued the Church , and gaue himselfe for it , not because it was sanctified , but that he might sanctifie it : so as The Grace which Christ sheweth to the Church , is a preuenting Grace . Sanctification is no cause , but an effect of Christs loue : and followeth in order after his loue . His loue arose only and wholly from himselfe : in the parties loued , there was nothing but matter of hatred before they were loued . Moses thus saith of the loue of God to Israel , The Lord did not set his loue vpon you because yee were more in number , but because the Lord loued you . This at first sight may seeme to be ( as we say ) * a womans reason , that the Lord should set his loue on them because he loued them , but it being duly obserued , we shall finde excellently set forth the ground of Gods loue to rest altogether in himselfe , and in his owne good pleasure . Yea this being noted as the end of Christs loue , that he might sanctifie it , it further sheweth that it was not any foresight of holinesse in the Church that moued him to loue it : first he loued it , and then sought how to make it amiable , and worthy to be loued . Herein differeth Christs loue from the loue of all men towards their spouses : for they must see something in them , to moue them to loue . When Ahash-verosh was to choose a wife , the maidens out of whom he was to take one , were first purified , and then he tooke her in whom he most delighted : But Christ first loueth his spouse , and then sanctifieth it . Before he loued it , he saw nothing in it why he should preferre it before the world . Seeing of him , and through him , and to him is all the beauty and dignitie of the Church , the glorie be to him for euer , Amen . §. 35. Of Christs seeking to make his Church pure . The Matter or substance of that subordinate end which Christ aimed at in giuing himselfe for the Church , is in these words ( that he might sanctifie it hauing cleansed it ) which in generall shew that Christ seeketh the purity of his Church . For this end hath he shed his owne most pure and pretious bloud ( for b his bloud cleanseth vs from all sinne ) and conueyed his holy Spirit into his body the Church , which is called the c Spirit of Sanctification , because it reneweth and sanctifieth those in whom it is . This Christ aimeth at , that he might make his spouse like to himselfe , pure , as he is pure . That end which Christ aimed at , we that professe our selues to be of this Church , must endeuour after : for euery man that hath this hope in him purgeth himselfe as he is pure . Let vs therefore vse all good meanes to cleanse our selues from all filthinesse of flesh , and spirit . This being the end which Christ aimeth at for the good of his Church to cleanse it , they who finde themselues cleansed haue a good euidence that they are of this Church : they who are not cleansed can haue no assurance thereof . How vnworthy are they of this benefit , that liue as the world , and like swine vpon euery occasion wallow in the mire , being drawne by euery temptation into sinne ? Doe they not , as much as in them lieth , make the death of Christ to be in vaine , and peruert that maine end , which Christ aimed at in giuing himselfe ? But what may be thought of such as Ismael-like mocke and scoffe at those that labour to be cleansed ? §. 36. Of the Churches Iustification . The two particular parts of the forenamed end , which are Cleansing , and sanctifying , doe more distinctly set forth the puritie of the Church euen in this world . Cleansing hath relation to the bloud of Christ , and so pointeth out our Iustification . Sanctifying hath relation to the Spirit of Christ , which worketh our Sanctification . From this cleansing of the Church here meant , I gather , that No sinne lieth vpon the Church : for the bloud of Christ purgeth from all sinne . This is to be taken of the guilt of sin , which by Christs death is cleane taken away : so as that sinne which is in vs , is as not in vs , because it is not imputed vnto vs. Behold here the blessed estate of the Church , for , Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiuen , whose sinne is couered . Blessed is the man vnto whom the Lord imputeth not sinne . §. 37. Of the Churches Sanctification . From the sanctifying of the Church here mentioned , I further gather , that The Church is made holy and righteous : This is here meant of that inherent righteousnesse which the Spirit of Christ worketh in all the members of his body . In which respect they are called Saints : so as not only the guilt of sinne is taken away , but also the very body of sinne is so destroied in them , as it can no more raigne in them , nor they obey it in the lusts thereof : but in stead of the dominion of sinne the spirit of Christ raigneth in them , and leadeth them vnto all righteousnesse . Behold here the free estate of the Church : whereas the world lieth vnder the slauerie of sinne , and tyrannie of Satan , the Church is made free from sinne , and a seruant of righteousnesse : dead to sinne , and aliue to God in Iesus Christ . §. 38. Of the Churches purity before God and Man. From the Connexion of these two benefits of Christs death , Iustification and Sanctification together , we see that The Church is both spotlesse before God and blamelesse before men . The bloud of Christ so cleanfeth her as in Gods sight she hath no spot of sinne : and the spirit of Christ so sanctifieth her , as her righteousnesse shineth before men : for the Grace of God teacheth her to denie vngodlinesse , and worldly lusts , and to liue soberly , righteously , and godly in this present world . In this respect the Church is said to be all glorious within , and her clothing also to be of wrought gold . And Zacharias and Elizabet , members of this Church , are said to be righteous before God , and blamelesse , namely before men . There is no such purity in any , as in the Church . For true and perfect beautie is onely in the body of Christ , which is the Church , whereof it is said , Thou art all faire , and there is no spot in thee , Cant. 4. 7. 1. Quest . Is it possible that neither God nor man should espie any fault in those that are of the true Church , while here they liue in this world ? Answ . Seeing the flesh remaineth in the best while they remaine in the world , it is not possible but that both God and man must needs espie many blemishes in the best . All things are naked and opened to the eyes of God : if therefore any remnant of sinne be in the Saints ( as there are exceeding many in euerie one ; so as if we say that we haue no sinne we deceiue our selues , and the truth is not in vs ) it is without question manifest in his sight . Yea such is the imperfection and weaknesse of the best Saints , as the flesh continually lusting in them against the Spirit , oft times preuaileth , and so sheweth it selfe in some euill fruit or other , as the eye of man espieth it : instance the examples of the best that euer liued in any age . 2. Quest . How then are they spotlesse before God , and blamelesse before men ? Answ . 1. God so fully dischargeth and acquitteth the Church of all her sinnes , as she is in his account as if she had no specke of sinne at all . Dauid in this respect vseth the metaphor of couering sinne , and explaineth his meaning by these two phrases , forgiuing , not imputing sinne . 2. The course of a mans life , not this or that particular action , is it which maketh a man blame-worthie , or blamelesse : as the flocke of swallowes , and not one here , or another there , is it which sheweth the Spring . Now because the constant carriage of those who are of the Church is before men blamelesse , they may iustly be so accounted , notwithstanding some particular things blame-worthie doe sometimes passe from them . Behold here how the true Saints may boldly lift vp their faces before God and man. The soundnesse of their faith causeth confidence before God. The testimonie of their conscience causeth courage before men . Let all that desire this boldnesse , ioyne a sound faith and a good conscience together , and labour for assurance both of their cleansing by the bloud of Christ , and sanctifying by the Spirit of Christ . §. 39. Of the order and dependance of iustification and sanctification one vpon another . The order and manner of knitting these two benefits together is worthie to be noted . The letter setteth sanctification in the first place : but the sense presupposeth iustification : for thus he saith , that he might sanctifie it , * hauing cleansed it . Because the cleansing here spoken of is an inward inuisible worke , and the euidence thereof is sanctification , which is an outward and sensible worke , therefore this is first expressed , and then that inferred , as a matter necessarily to be presupposed . Hence arise these Doctrines . Our English with this particle ( hauing ) doth fitly and properly expound the Greeke actiue participles of the Praeterperfect or finite tenses , which because the Latines want , they are faine to vse the passiue , or a Periphrasis : as , vt illam sanctificaret mundatam , Erasm . Postquam eam purgasset , Beza . 1. Iustification in order goeth before sanctification : I say in order , because at that verie moment that Christ by his bloud cleanseth his Church , he beginneth to sanctifie her : but when he beginneth to sanctifie her , he hath cleansed her , she is iustified . The grace then of iustification is a most free grace : it is not wrought vpon any righteousnesse of ours : for it is before it . 2. Christ sanctifieth those whom he hath cleansed . This the Apostle copiously proueth in the sixth chapter to the Romans . Let none therefore boast of their cleansing by Christs bloud , till they finde themselues renewed and sanctified by the Spirit of Christ . For note the Apostles description of those who are iustified by Christ , which for more perspicuitie may thus be set downe by question and answer . To whom is there no condemnation ? To them that are in Christ Iesus . Who are they ? They who walke not after the flesh , but after the Spirit . 3. Sanctification presupposeth iustification : they who are sanctified may rest vpon it , that they are cleansed and iustified . For sanctification is a fruit of iustification , in which respect S. Iames saith , that we are iustified by works , that is , declared so to be . Admirable is the comfort which the Saints in this world reape hereby . For their sanctification being imperfect , and the flesh abiding in them , and lusting against the Spirit : yea sinne being present with them when they would doe good , they are oft forced to complaine and crie , O wretched m●n that we are : who shall deliuer vs from this bodie of death ! If they had no other ground to fasten the anchor of their hope vpon but their sanctification , it could not hold them fast enough against the tempests of Satans temptations . But in that their sanctification is a fruit and euidence of their iustification , they take heart to themselues , and thanke God that with the minde they themselues serue the Law of God , though with the flesh the law of sinne . And thus vpheld and comforted , they continue to striue against sinne , till it be cleane rooted out of them , as well as remitted . §. 40. Of Sacramentall washing of water . One of the meanes which Christ vseth for the cleansing and sanctifying of his Church , is expressed vnder this phrase , with the washing of water . Water is the outward element vsed in Baptisme : Washing is the principall Sacramentall rite therein . Water setteth forth Christs bloud : Washing noteth out the application and efficacie thereof , which is the purging and cleansing of our soules . As water without washing maketh nothing cleane : so the bloud of Christ , without a right application thereof , cleanseth no mans soule . This washing of water here mentioned , being applied to an inward spirituall cleansing , what can it else set forth but the Sacrament of Baptisme , wherein both water and washing is vsed ? Obiect . There is but little washing vsed in the Sacrament of Baptisme , nothing but sprinkling a little water on the face of the partie that is baptized . Answ . That sprinkling is sufficient to shew the vse of water . The partie to be baptized is not brought to the Font to haue his face , or any other part of his bodie made cleane , but to haue assurance of the inward cleansing of his soule . Now that our mindes may not too much dote on the outward thing done , but be wholly raised vp to the mysterie , the outward element is no further vsed , then may serue to put vs in minde of the inward thing signified thereby : answerably in the Lords Supper there is not so much bread and wine giuen and receiued , as would satisfie ones appetite , or slake his hunger and quench his thirst , but only a little bit of bread , and taste of wine , to declare the vse of bread and wine , and so to draw the mindes of the Communicants to a consideration of their spirituall nourishment by the bodie and bloud of Iesus Christ . §. 41. How Baptisme is a meanes of cleansing and sanctifying . The manner of inferring this Sacramentall washing vpon the sanctifying and cleansing of the Church thus , with the washing of water , sheweth , that Baptisme is a meanes of sanctifying and cleansing the Church . All those places of Scripture that attribute a Regeneration , b Iustification , c Sanctification , or d Saluation thereunto , proue as much . But that the truth thereof may more fully and distinctly be conceiued , I will briefly shew , 1. In what respect Baptisme is a meanes of our sanctifying and cleansing . 2. What kinde of meanes it is . 3. How necessarie it is . In foure especiall respects it may be said to be a meanes as aforesaid . 1. In that it doth most liuely represent and set forth euen to the outward senses the inward cleansing of our soules by the bloud of Christ , and sanctifying of vs by the Spirit of Christ . Apply the vse of water ( by the washing whereof foule things are made verie cleane ) to the vertue of Christs bloud and efficacie of his Spirit , and the truth hereof will euidently appeare . For the better helpe in this application , read Rom. 6. 4. &c. 2. In that it doth truly propound and make tender , or offer of the grace of iustification and sanctification to the partie baptized . In this respect it is thus described , Baptisme of repentance for remission of sinnes : and S. Peter to like purpose saith , Repent , and be baptized euerie one of you for the remission of sins . 3. In that it doth really exhibit and seale vp to the conscience of him that is baptized the forenamed graces , whereby he is assured that he is made partaker thereof . Thus Abraham receiued the signe of circumcision as a seale of the righteousnesse of faith . Hence is it that the Eunuch and others when they were baptized , went away reioycing . 4. In that it is a particular and peculiar pledge to the partie baptized , that euen he himselfe is made partaker of the said graces : therefore euerie one in particular is baptized for himselfe : yea , though many be at once brought to the Font , yet euerie one by name is baptized . To this purpose faith the Apostle , Whosoeuer are baptized into Christ , haue put on Christ ; whosoeuer , whether Peter , Iohn , Thomas , or any other particular person . Ananias said to Paul in the singular number , Be thou baptized , and wash away thy sinnes . §. 42. Obiections against the efficacie of baptisme answered . 1. Obiect . Many that are baptized receiue no such grace at all , they are neither cleansed nor sanctified . Answ . They are only outwardly washed with water , they are not baptized with the Holy Ghost . The fault is not in that no grace accompanieth that Sacrament , but in that they receiue not , but reiect the grace which appertaineth thereto : what if some beleeue not ? shall their vnbeleefe make the faith of God without effect ? God forbid . 2. Obiect . Many receiue the forenamed graces before they are baptized , as Abraham before he was circumcized , and such as were baptized after they beleeued . How then is baptisme a meanes thereof ? Answ . Their spirituall cleansing is more liuely and fully manifested thereby , and they the more assured thereof . 3. Obiect . Many who long after their baptisme , haue liued like swine in sinne , and so haue not beene cleansed or sanctified , yet diuers yeeres after haue beene effectually called : what meanes hath baptisme beene hereof ? Answ . The vse and efficacie of baptisme is not as the act thereof , transient , but permanent and perpetuall so long as the partie baptized liueth . Whensoeuer a sinner vnfainedly repenteth , and faithfully laieth hold on the promises of God , baptisme , which is the seale thereof is as powerfull and effectuall as it could haue beene when it was first administred . For the efficacie of baptisme consisteth in the free offer of grace . So long therefore as God continueth to offer grace , so long may a mans baptisme be effectuall . On this ground we are but once for all baptized : and as the Prophets put the people in minde of their circumcision , so the Apostles of their baptisme long after it was administred . Yea , they speake of it ( though the act were long before past ) as if it were in doing , in the time present , Baptisme saueth . §. 43. What kinde of meanes of grace Baptisme is . II. Baptisme is no physicall or naturall meanes of working grace , as if the grace which is sealed vp thereby were inherent in the water , or in the Ministers act of sprinkling it ( as in medicines , salues , hearbs , meats , and the like , there is inherent that vertue which proceedeth from the vse of them : and being applied , they haue their operation , whether a man beleeue it , or no ) but it is only a voluntarie instrument which Christ vseth , as it pleaseth him , to worke what grace , or measure of grace seemeth best to him : so as grace is only assistant to it , not included in it : yet in the right vse thereof , Christ by his Spirit worketh that grace which is receiued by it , in which respect the Minister is said to baptize with water , but Christ with the Holy Ghost and with fire , Matth. 3. 11. §. 44. Of the necessitie of Baptisme . III. A meanes of working a thing may be said to be necessarie two wayes . 1. Absolutely , so as the thing cannot possibly be without it . Thus are the proper causes of a thing absolutely necessarie , as in this case , Gods couenant , Christs bloud , and the operation of the Spirit , are absolutely necessarie for attaining any grace . 2. By consequence , so as according to that course and order which God hath set downe , things cannot be without them . Baptisme is not absolutely necessarie as a cause : for then should it be equall to Gods couenant , Christs bloud , and the worke of the Spirit . Yea then should all that are baptized without any exception be cleansed . But it is by consequence necessarie : and that in a double respect . 1. In regard of Gods ordinance . 2. In regard of our need thereof . 1. God hauing ordained this a Sacrament to be vsed , it is necessarie it should be vsed , if for no other end , yet for manifestation of our obedience . He that carelesly neglecteth ; or wilfully contemneth any Sacrament which God shall enioyne him to vse , his soule shall be cut off . 2. Great is the need that we haue thereof , in regard of our dulnesse in conceiuing things spirituall , and of our weaknesse in beleeuing things inuisible . We are carnall , and earthly : and by things sensible and earthly , doe the better conceiue things spirituall and heauenly : therefore hath God ordained visible elements to be Sacraments of inuisible graces . Againe we are slow to beleeue such things as are promised in the word , therefore the more to helpe and strengthen our faith , God hath added to his couenant in the word , his seale in and by the Sacrament : that by two immutable things , ( Gods couenant and Gods seale ) in which it is impossible for God to lie , we might haue strong consolation . Besides , though in generall we doe beleeue the truth of Gods word , yet we are doubtfull to apply it to our selues : wherefore for better applying Gods couenant to our owne soule , God hath added his Sacrament to his word . §. 45. Of the contrarie extremes of Papists and Anabaptists about the necessitie and efficacie of Baptisme . There are two extremes contrarie to the forenamed points about baptisme . One in the excesse , which is of Papists that attribute too much thereunto , and make it a plaine Idoll . Another in the defect , of Anabaptists and Libertines , which derogate too much from it , and make it an idle ceremonie . In two things doe Papists exceed , 1. In the necessitie Of Baptisme . 2. In the efficacie     They make it so absolutely necessary , as if any die vnbaptized he cannot be saued : which doome they passe against infants , though they be depriued thereof without any fault of their owne , yea or of their parents , being still borne . A mercilesse sentence without any warrant of Gods word : yea against his word & against the order which he hath prescribed . He hath established his couenant , & promised to be the God of the faithfull & of their seed : on which ground S. Peter saith , The promise is vnto you & vnto your children : & S. Paul saith , your children are holy . Shall all these priuiledges be made void by an ineuitable want of baptisme ? if so , would God haue enioyned circumcision ( which to the Iewes was as baptisme is to Christians ) to be put off to the eighth day , before which day many infants died ? or would Moses haue suffered it to be forborne all the time that the Israelites were in the wildernesse ? If it be said that baptisme is more necessarie then circumcision , I answer , the Scripture layeth no more necessitie vpon it . If it were so necessarie as they make it , then the vertue of Christs death were lesse effectuall since he was actually exhibited then before . For before it was effectuall for infants without a Sacrament , but belike not now . Had the ancient Churches conceiued so of the absolute necessitie of baptisme , they would not haue had set times for the administring thereof : nor suffered it to be put off so long as they did . a Some Churches appointed it to be administred only at Easter . b Some at Easter and Whitsuntide . And though many who gaue euidence of their true faith died before they were baptized , yet c they did not thereupon iudge them to be damned . This practise and iudgement of the ancients hath made d many Papists somewhat to mitigate that absolute necessitie , and to say that , In this case , God which hath not bound his grace , in respect of his owne freedome , to any Sacrament , may and doth accept them as baptized , which either are martyred before they could be baptized , on else depart this life with vow and desire to haue that Sacrament , but by some remedilesse necessitie could not obtaine it . If remedilesse necessitie can helpe the matter , what necessitie so remedilesse , as for a childe to be still borne . Againe , they adde such efficacie to baptisme , as it giueth grace e of the worke it selfe : wherein they equall it to the verie bloud of Christ ; and take away the peculiar worke of the Spirit ; and the vse of faith , repentance , and such like graces . What can there be more in the water of baptisme , then was in the bloud of such beasts as were offered vp for sacrifices ? But it is not possible that the bloud of Buls and Goats should take away sin . They themselues attribute no such efficacie to the word preached , and yet they cannot shew where the holy Ghost hath giuen more vertue to baptisme , then to the word . This text ioyneth them both together ( that he might cleanse it with the washing of water through the word ) What can be more said of a meanes then that which is said of the word ? It pleased God by preaching to saue them that beleeue . The Gospell is the power of God to saluation , &c. On the other side , Anabaptists , and such like Libertines , too lightly esteeme this holy and necessary ordinance of God , in that they make it only a badge of our profession , a note of difference betwixt the true and false Church , a signe of mutuall fellowship , a bare signe of spirituall grace , a resemblance of mortification , regeneration , inscition into Christ , with the like , but no more : These indeed are some of the ends and vses of Baptisme : But in that they restraine all the efficacy thereof hereunto , they take away the greatest comfort , and truest benefit which the Church reapeth thereby , as may be gathered out of the points noted * before . §. 46. Of the inward washing by Baptisme . In that with this washing of water , Christ cleanseth his Church , I obserue that Whosoeuer are fully baptised are cleansed from sinne . Fully , that is , powerfully and effectually , as well inwardly by the Spirit , as outwardly by the Minister . Cleansed , both from the guilt of sinne by Christs bloud , and from the power of sinne by the worke of his Spirit . To this purpose tend the many emphaticall phrases attributed by the Apostles to Baptisme , as that we are baptised into Iesus Christ , baptised into his death , buried with him by baptisme ; that Baptisme doth saue vs ; that Baptisme is the washing of regeneration , with the like . Vaine is the reioycing of many , who boast of their baptisme , and thinke themselues by vertue thereof to be as good Christians as the best , and yet liue and lie in their sinne , being more besmeered and defiled therewith then they were , when they were first borne . Iohn saith , Christ baptiscth with the holy Ghost and with fire : the Apostle saith , Christ cleanseth with the washing of water . If that fire of the holy Ghost burne not vp the drosse of sinne in thee , and this water wash not away the filth of sinne , thou wert neuer : fully baptised . It may be the hand of some Minister hath sprinkled a little water on thy face , but Christs bloud hath not as yet beene sprinkled on the soule : all the benefit which thou reapest by thy baptisme is , that another day thou shalt dearely answer for the abuse of so honourable an ordinance . §. 47. Of ioyning the word with Baptisme . The other meanes of sanctifying and cleansing the Church here expressed , is the word . This being applied vnto Baptisme , and ioyned with it , must needs be meant of the promise of Grace sealed vp in Baptisme , which is Gods promise of iustifying vs freely and sanctifying vs effectually , plainly made knowne and truly beleeued : This meanes being thus added to this Sacrament , we may well inferre that It is necessary that the word and Baptisme goe together : that where this Sacrament is administred , the doctrine thereof be truly , plainly , intelligibly taught , so as the nature , efficacy , end , and vse thereof may be made knowne ; and the couenant of God sealed vp thereby , beleeued . So saith Christ , a Goe teach all nations baptising them . So did the b Baptist , and the c Apostles , they preached the Gospell to them whom they baptised . 1. A Sacrament without the word is but an idle ceremony : no more then a seale without a couenant : for it is the word that maketh knowne the couenant of God. 2. It is the word which maketh the greatest difference betwixt the sacramentall washing of water , and ordinary common washing . 3. By the word the ordinary creatures which we vse are sanctified , much more the holy ordinances of God , whereof Baptisme is one of the principall . Quest . Is it not then lawfull to administer Baptisme without a Sermon ? Answ . Though it be a very commendable , and honourable manner of administring that Sacrament , then to administer it when the word is preached , yet I thinke not a Sermon at that time to be so necessary , as it should be vnlawfull without one , to administer Baptisme . For the ioyning of the word and Sacrament here spoken of is , that they who are baptised , or who present children to be baptised , and answer for them , or are present at the administring of Baptisme , or liue in the places where it vseth to be administred , should be instructed in the Gospell , and taught the couenant which Baptisme sealeth vp . Besides , the liturgie and publike forme prescribed for the administring of Baptisme both in our Church and other reformed Churches , laieth downe the nature , efficacy , end , vse , and other like points appertaining to that Sacrament , & plainly declareth the couenant of God sealed vp thereby : so as in our and other like Churches where such formes are prescribed to be alwaies vsed , the word is neuer separated from Baptisme , though at the administring of Baptisme there be no Sermon . The Church of Rome doth directly transgresse against the forenamed rule of ioyning the word and Baptisme together . For though they haue a publike forme prescribed , yet it being in an vnknowne tongue , not vnderstood of the people , nor expounded to them , it is all one as if there were no forme at all , no word at all : for that which is not vnderstood is all one as if it were not vttered . Much more hainous is their transgression who liue vnder the Gospell , where it is preached plainly to the vnderstanding and capacity of the meanest , and yet are carelesse in comming to it , or in attending vnto it , and so remaine as ignorant as if they liued in places where the word is not preached at all , or in an vnknowne tongue . Such ignorant persons if they were not baptised are not worthy while they remaine so ignorant to be baptised , nor yet to present their children to be baptised , or to be present at the baptisme of others . As Ministers that baptise ought to preach the word , so ought they who are baptised to be instructed in the word . §. 48. Of the Inference of Glorification vpon Iustification and Sanctification . EPHES. 5. 27. That he might present it to himselfe a glorious Church , &c. THe most principall end , in regard of the Churches good , which Christ aimed at when he gaue himselfe for her , is her glorious estate in heauen : this is the end of the forenamed end . For why did Christ giue himselfe for the Church ? That he might sanctifie it , hauing cleansed it : why did he cleanse , and sanctifie it ? That he might present it to himseife a glorious Church . Hence note these three points . 1. Iustification and sanctification must goe before glorification . 2. The end why the Saints are cleansed and sanctified in this world , is that they may be presented glorious to Christ in the world to come . 3. The only meanes to make vs glorious before Christ our spouse is righteousnesse . 1. All those places of Scripture which set our righteousnesse in this world before our glory in the world to come ( as very many places doe ) doe proue the first point , that Iustification and Sanctification must goe before Glorification . Among other proofes note especially the order of the seuerall linkes of that golden chaine that reacheth from Gods eternall counsell before the world , vnto our euerlasting glory after this world , Whom he did predestinate them he also called ; and whom he called them he also iustified ; and whom he iustified them he also glorified . 1. Heauen , the place of our glorification , is an holy Citie , whereinto no vncleane thing shall enter . 2. In that place the Church is to be maried vnto Christ , and to be euer with him : she must therefore be pure as he is pure : for he will not endure the society of a foule filthy spouse . As we desire assurance of our glorification in heauen , so let vs get , and giue euidence of our iustification and sanctification on earth . The euidence of our iustification is a sound and true faith . The euidence of our sanctification is a good and cleare conscience . The forenamed proofes and reasons doe also confirme the second point , that The end why the Saints are cleansed and sanctified in this world is , that they may be presented glorious to Christ in the world to come . It is therefore needfull and behouefull , not only in regard of Christs honour , but also of our owne glory and happinesse , that here while we liue on earth we be sanctified and cleansed . If Christ for our sakes had an eie at our future and euerlasting glory , and for that end prepared meanes to bring vs thereunto , ought not we ourselues much rather haue an eie thereat , and both auoid all things which may hinder it , and vse all meanes whereby we may be assured of it ? Moses had respect vnto the recompence of the reward . Yea Christ for the ioy which was set before him endured the crosse , and despised the shame . 3. That Righteousnesse is the only meanes to make vs glorious before Christ our spouse , is euident by this , that Christ gaue himselfe to worke and effect this meanes for this end . Christ himselfe by his death , hath consecrated this , and no other meanes . If there be any other meanes then that which Christ by offering vp himselfe hath procured , what need Christ to haue beene offered vp ? To shew that this is the meanes to make the Church glorious before Christ , the holy Ghost resembleth the righteousnesse of the Saints to fine linnen , cleane , and white , wherewith the wife of the Lambe is made ready against the day of mariage . Christ himselfe loueth righteousnesse and hateth wickednesse : they therefore , and none but they that are araied with righteousnesse , are glorious in his eies . This I haue the rather noted against the conceit of our aduersaries , who place all the glory of the Church in outward pompe . Wherefore their Pope whom they make head of the Church , and after a peculiar manner the spouse of Christ , must haue his triple crowne , his scarlet robes , his throne aduanced aboue kings : Men must be his horses to beare him : and Kings and Nobles must be his men to wait on him . Their Priests also must be araied with glorious copes of the best wrought gold . Their temples must be decked with curious , carued , gilded images . Their hoast caried about in manner of a triumph . Their people all besprinkled with water . Their superstitious houses must be the fairest buildings in a kingdome , and haue the greatest reuenues of a kingdome belonging to them : with the like . Is this glory fit for Christs spouse ? belike then Christ hath carnall eies and eares : and is delighted with those things wherewith the world is delighted . The wiser among the heathen did scoffe at such base conceits which their people had of their gods . Shall Christians thinke more basely of Christ , then the heathen of their gods ? Too much doe most people doat on outward worldly glory : euen so much as they neglect true righteousnesse . For our parts as we desire to appeare before Christ so as he may thinke vs glorious , let vs be araied with righteousnesse & holinesse , without which no man shall see the Lord , Heb. 12. 14. §. 44. Of the fruition of Christs presence in heauen . EPHES. 5. 27. That he might present it to himselfe a glorious Church , not hauing spot or wrinkle , or any such thing : but that it should be holy , and without blemish . HAuing noted the inference of this verse vpon the former : I will now handle it distinctly by it selfe . In it is contained a description of the glorious estate of the Church in heauen . Of that estate must this description be here meant , for on earth it is not simply without spot or wrinkle : though it be prepared so to be . This estate is 1. Generally propounded . 2. Particularly exemplified .   In the generall proposition is noted , 1. Her condition ( she is presented to Christ . ) 2. Her quality ( glorious . )   The particular exemplification thereof is 1. Priuatiue , by remouing all deformity : noted in two words , Spot , Wrinkle .   2. Positiue , by adorning her with beauty : noted also in two words , Holy , Blamelesse .   The word ( present ) is taken from the custome of solemnizing a mariage : first the spouse was wooed , and then set before her husband that he might take her to wife , to be with him . Thus b Eue was presented by God to Adam that he might take her for his wife : and c Esther among other virgins was presented to Ahash-verosh . This sheweth that The Church in heauen shall enioy the presence of Christ : d Christ himselfe saith expresly to his disciples , I goe to prepare a place for you , that where I am , there ye may be also . On this ground did the Apostle desire to depart , namely e to be with Christ , and f to be present with the Lord. In heauen is the mariage betwixt Christ and the Church solemnized , which here on earth hath beene in preparing . God the Father hath giuen his g sonne vnto the Church , and the h Church vnto his sonne : yea i Christ himselfe hath purchased the Church vnto himselfe by his bloud , and k promised mariage vnto her , and the more to assure the Church of his loue he hath l bestowed many gifts vpon her : he hath further sent * his Ministers in his name to m wooe and n beseech the Church to giue her consent , and to o prepare her as a pure virgin for himselfe : Hereupon the Church hath giuen her consent , for p as a spouse she is subiect vnto Christ as vnto an head . These things being so , how can it be thought that Christ will forsake her , and not receiue her to be with him for euer ? Can the thought of death be terrible to such as know and beleeue the truth hereof ? Will not rather the consideration thereof make them with the Apostle to sigh , and desire to depart , that they may be with the Lord ? The highest degree of the Churches happinesse consisteth in this fruition of the presence of her spouse : for so he becommeth all in all vnto her : not by meanes , as in this world , but immediatly by himselfe : so as there shall need no Minister , no Sacrament , no ordinance to set forth Christ vnto vs : no Gouernour in family , Church , or common-wealth , to represent his person , or to keepe vs in subiection : no light to direct vs , no food to sustaine vs ; we shall be so assisted with Christ as we shall need nothing . If those seruants were happy that stood continually before Salomon , what are they that alwaies stand not as seruants but as a wife in his presence that is infinitly greater then Salomon ? If it were a great grace & fauour , that Moses saw the back-parts of God , what a grace and fauour is it , to behold Christ face to face ? For when he doth appeare , we shall see him as he is . Though now we be absent from the Lord , yet let vs vphold our selues with the expectation and assurance of this , that we shall be presented before Christ . §. 50. Of the Glorie of the Church in heauen . The quality of the Church in heauen is as excellent as may be , and therefore here said to be glorious : all beautie , all comelinesse , all grace , whatsoeuer may make the Church amiable , louely , or any way to be desired , or admired , is comprised vnder this word glorious . In this respect the Saints are said to shine , and that as b pretious stones , yea as the c firmament , as the starres , and as the d sunne : and to be e like Christ himselfe : and to f appeare with him in glory . This glory of the Saints extendeth both to soule and body , and whole person . In regard of their soules they shall be all g glorious within : for they are h Spirits of iust men , made perfect : i perfect knowledge , wisdome , and all manner of purity shall be in them . In regard of their bodies , they shall be k fashioned like to Christs glorious body : and that in incorruption , immortality , beauty , brightnesse , grace , fauour , agility , strength , and the like . It is therefore truly said , that the Church in the end of the world expecteth that which is before demonstrated in Christs body . In regard of their person , as a wife is aduanced to the honour and dignity of her husband , so shall they to the honour and dignity of Christ , so farre as they are capable of it : for they shall be l next vnto Christ , yea m one with him , and so n aboue the most glorious Angels . Much more might be spoken of the glory of the Church : but neuer can enough be spoken thereof , no not by the tongue of men or Angels : for o eye hath not seene , nor eare heard , neither haue entered into the heart of man the things which God hath prepared for them which loue him . When Paul was rapt vp into the third heauen , and saw but a glimps of this glory , p he heard vnspeakable words , which are not possible for man to vtter . Wherefore q when he speaketh of it , he vseth such a transcendent kinde of phrase , as cannot in any tongue be fully expressed : we thus as well as we can by one degree of comparison vpon another translate it , * a farre more exceeding and eternall weight of glorie . Is not this sufficient to vphold vs against all the reproach and disgrace which the world layeth vpon vs , because we are of the Church of Christ ? The world hath r of old counted her , to whom Christ saith , Hephzibah ( that is , my delight in her ) and Beulah ( that is , maried ) forsaken and desolate , yea s as the filth of the world , and the off-scowring of all things . Among Heathen , none so vildly esteemed of as Christians ; and amongst Papists , none so as Protestants ; & amongst carnall Gospellers , none so as they who endeuour t to purifie themselues as Christ is pure , and to auoid the common sins of the world . When for Christs sake we are basely accounted of , let vs thinke of this . §. 51. Of the Churches freedome from all deformity in heauen . Not hauing spot , or wrinkle , or any such thing . The first point noted by the Apostle in his exemplification of the forenamed glorie , is a remouing of all deformitie . The word translated * spot , is taken for a staine on a garment , and a foule specke on a mans face , or other part of the bodie : or a scarre , or other blemish in his flesh by a sore , wound , blow , or the like . The other word ( * wrinkl - ) is taken for a creast in the face through old age , for it signifieth a gathering together of the skin by old age : by it is meant any manner of breaking ( as we speake ) by age , sicknesse , trouble , paine , or the like . Because there may be also deformities other wayes , the Apostle addeth this clause ( or any such thing . ) These things applied to the Church , shew that No manner of deformitie shall cleaue to the Church in heauen . Thereshall be in her no staine or contagion of sinne receiued from others , no scarre of any euill humour arising from it selfe , no wrinkle , no defect of spirituall moisture , no signe of the old man , nor any thing that may any way make it seeme deformed , or vncomely in the sight of Christ . Not only great , hainous , capitall sins , ( which are as botches and boiles , and as open , wide sores , gashes and wounds ) but all spots and specks , all wrinkles and defects , all manner of blemishes whatsoeuer within , or without , shall be cleane taken away . Sinne shall not only be subdued in vs , but vtterly rooted out of vs : no relique , no signe thereof shall be left remaining . In this respect it is said , that God shall wipe away all teares , that is , shall take away all matter of mourning , sorrow , and griefe . Now there is nothing that ministreth matter of more sorrow to the Saints then sinne . That remnant of sin which was in the Apostle euen after his regeneration , made him thus cry out , O wretched man that I am . Though this be but a priuatiue good , yet it addeth much to the heauenly happinesse of the Saints . If it were possible that we should enioy the rest and glorie prepared for the Saints in heauen , and withall there should remaine on vs the spots and wrinkles of sinne , these spots and wrinkles would be as the hand-writing which appeared to Belshazzer in the midst of his iollitie : they would be as gall mixed with wine : they would turne all our ioy into heauinesse , and take away the sweet rellish of all our happinesse . The consideration therefore of this priuatiue benefit cannot but breed in the hearts of all such as are members of this Church a longing desire after this perfect purging of them from all deformitie . §. 52. Of the perfect puritie of the Church in heauen . But that it should be holy and without blemish . The last branch whereby the celestiall glorie of the Church is set forth , is the perfect puritie thereof : the aduersatiue particle ( BVT ) sheweth that the holinesse here spoken of is no imperfect * holinesse , such as the sanctification of the Saints is in this world , but an absolute perfect holinesse in all the parts and degrees thereof : such as is without spot or wrinkle : without relique , or signe of sinne : and therefore by way of explanation is added , * without blemish , or blamelesse : such as man , Angell , nor God himselfe can finde fault withall . b This attribute is oft applied to the person and bloud of Iesus Christ , and therefore it must needs set forth perfect puritie . Whence we may obserue that The Sanctification of the Saints shall be perfect in heauen . They shall not only be iustified by hauing their sinnes couered to them , nor only haue their sanctification truly begun in them , but also in euerie part , point , and degree thereof absolutely perfected : in which respect they are said to be iust men made perfect . Adam in his innocencie was not more pure then the Saints shall be in heauen : yea they shall farre surpasse Adam as in the measure , so in the stabilite and perpetuitie thereof . In our endeuour after holinesse let vs haue an eye to this perfection : and not faint , if we attaine not to that measure which we desire . Perfection is reserued for the world to come . Yet know we , that the more holy and blamelesse we are , the neerer we come to that heauenly estate : the more spots and blemishes of sinne we haue , the more vnlike we are vnto it , and the lesse hope we haue of enioying that heauenly happinesse . All the forenamed seuerall points of the glorious estate of the Church in heauen should rauish our spirits , and euen breake our hearts with an holy admiration of Christs good-nesse , and fill our mouths with praises for the same , and make vs sigh , and long after the same , and with all good conscience and diligence vse all the meanes we can to attaine thereunto : no labour will be lost herein . Surely , this is either not knowne , or not beleeued , or not remembred , or not duly and seriously considered by such as make light account thereof . Let that which hath beene but briefly touched be further meditated vpon , and let vs pray that the eyes of our vnderstanding may be enlightned , that we may know what is the riches of the glorious inheritance of the Saints . Were it not for this hope , the Saints were of all the most miserable ; whereas now they are the most happy . §. 53. Of the application of the things which Christ hath done for the Church , vnto husbands . EPHES. 5. 28. So ought men to loue their wiues , &c. THE first clause of this verse serueth both for an application of the former argument , and also for a transition to another argument . The particle of relation ( So ) sheweth that that which hath before beene deliuered of Christs loue to his Church , ought to be referred and applied to husbands . For as Christ loued his Church , So ought husbands to loue their wiues . Quest . Why are these transcendent euidences of Christs surpassing loue to his Church set before husbands ? can any such things be expected from husbands to their wiues ? Answ . No , * not for measure , but for likenesse . For in this large declaration of Christs loue , there are two generall points to be noted . 1. That the Church in her selfe was no way worthie of loue . 2. That Christ so carried himselfe towards her that he made her worthie of much loue . This ought to be the minde of husbands to their wiues . 1. Though they be no way worthie of loue , yet they must loue them . 2. They must endeuour with all the wit and wisdome they haue , to make them worthie of loue . I say endeuour because it is not simply in the husbands power to doe the deed . Yet his faithfull endeuour shall on his part be accepted for the deed . Of these points I shall hereafter more fully speake . §. 54. Of the application of the loue which a man beareth to himselfe , vnto an husband . EPHES. 5. 28. So ought men to loue their wiues as their owne bodies . THe forenamed particle ( So ) hath also relation to another patterne , namely , of a mans selfe to his bodie : and so it is a transition from one argument to another . There is some more Emphasis here vsed in setting downe an husbands dutie , then was before , vers . 25. There it was laid downe by way of exhortation , Husbands loue your wiues . Here it is laid downe with a straiter charge : Husbands ought to loue their wiues . So as this dutie is not a matter arbitrarie , left to the husbands will to doe it , or leaue it vndone : there is a necessitie laid vpon him : he must loue his wife . Woe therefore vnto him if he doe it not . In setting downe this argument taken from a mans selfe , the Apostle resembleth a mans wife vnto his bodie : wherein he hath relation to vers . 23. where he said , the husband is the head of the wife . Whereby he sheweth , that as an husbands place is a motiue to his wife , for her to performe her dutie : so to himselfe , for him to performe his dutie . He is her head , therefore she must be subiect to him . She is his bodie , therefore he must loue her . This example of a mans selfe is both a reason , the more to moue husbands to loue their wiues , and also a rule to teach them how to loue them . The reason is implied vnder that neere vnion that is betwixt a man and his wife : she is as neere to him as his owne bodie : therefore she ought to be as deere to him . The bodie neuer dissenteth from it selfe , nor the soule against it selfe . So neither should man and wife . The rule is noted vnder the manner of a mans louing his owne bodie : as intirely as he loueth his bodie , so intirely he ought to loue his wife . Of the manner of a mans louing himselfe , see Treat . 4. § . 74. 76. The more to enforce this comparison , the Apostle addeth , He that loueth his wife , loueth himselfe . By this clause two things are implied . 1. That a wife is not only as a mans bodie , namely , his outward flesh , but as his person , his bodie and soule . She is as his bodie , because she was taken out of his bodie : and because she is set vnder him , as his bodie vnder his head . She is as himselfe , by reason of the bond of mariage , which maketh one of two . In which respect a wife is commonly called a mans second selfe . 2. That an husband in louing his wife loueth himselfe : so as the benefit of louing his wife will redound to himselfe , as well as to his wife . §. 55. Of the amplification of a mans loue of himselfe . EPHES. 5. 29. For no man euer yet hated his owne flesh : but nourisheth and cherisheth it , euen as the Lord the Church . THe former patterne of a mans selfe is here further amplified . For first the Apostle proueth , that a man loueth himselfe : and then he sheweth how he loueth himselfe . Two arguments are vsed to proue the point . One is taken from the contrarie : No man euer yet hated his owne flesh . Therefore he loueth it . The other is taken from the effects of loue : To nourish and cherish ones flesh is a fruit of loue : But euerie man nourisheth and cherisheth his flesh . Therefore he loueth it . This latter argument sheweth the manner of a mans louing himselfe : and therein a mans loue of himselfe is a rule to teach him how to loue his wife . This indefinite particle ( no man ) is to be restrained to such as haue the vnderstanding and affection of a man in them : as if he had said , no man in his right wits : for furious , franticke , mad , desperate persons will cut their armes , legs , and other parts , mangle their flesh , hang , drowne , smother , choake , and stab themselues . Euen so they are as men out of their wits , who hate , or any way hurt their wiues : yea , it is the part of a mad man to doubt of louing , and doing good to himselfe . These two words ( to nourish and cherish ) comprize vnder them a carefull prouiding of all things needfull for a mans bodie . To nourish , is properly to feed . To cherish , is to keepe warme . The former is done by food : the latter by apparell . Vnder food , and apparell the Apostle comprizeth all things needfull for this life , where he saith , Hauing food andraiment , let vs therewith be content . This applied to an husband , sheweth that he ought to haue a prouident care for the good of his wife in all things needfull for her . That he may yet further presse this point , he returneth againe to the example of Christ ( euen as the Lord the Church ) The Apostle thought that this naile of loue had need be fast beaten into the heads and hearts of husbands , and therefore addeth blow to blow to knocke it vp deepe , euen to the head : before he confirmed Christs example with the example of our selues : here he confirmeth the example of our selues with the example of Christ againe . This he doth for two especiall reasons . 1. The more forcibly to vrge the point : for two examples adde weight one to another : especially this latter which is so farre more excellent as we heard out of vers . 25 , 26 , 27. 2. To giue husbands a better direction for their prouidence towards their wiues , whom they must nourish and cherish , not only as their bodies , but as Christ nourisheth and cherisheth his Church , not only with things temporall , but also with things spirituall and eternall . §. 56. Of mans naturall affection to himselfe . EPHES. 5. 28 , 29. So ought men to loue their wiues as their owne bodies : he that loueth his wife loueth himselfe . For no man euer yet hated his owne flesh : but nourisheth , and cherisheth it , euen as the Lord the Church . HAuing briefly shewed the generall scope of the 28 and 29 verses , I will proceed to a more distinct handling of them . They setforth The naturall affection of a man to himselfe . Two points are here to be noted . 1. The generall proposition , that a man is well affected to himselfe . 2. The particular amplification , and manifestation of that affection . This is manifested two waies . 1. Negatiuely , No man hateth his owne flesh .     2. Affirmatiuely , and that in two branches 1. Nourisheth it . 2. Cherisheth     Both these are iustified by the like affection of Christ to the Church which is his body ( Euen as the Lord the Church ) In that the Apostle propoundeth the naturall affection of a mans selfe to his body as a motiue and patterne to Christians , to loue their wiues , and also iustifieth the same by a like affection of Christ to his Church , I obserue that Naturall affection is a thing lawfull and commendable : it is an affection which may stand with a good conscience : which Gods word is so farre from taking away , as it doth establish it . For such as are * without naturall affection are directly condemned : and we are b commanded to be so kindly affectioned one to another as * we are to our selues . Yea the law in the strict rigour thereof laieth downe that naturall affection which is in a man to himselfe as a rule for the loue of his neighbour ( c thou shalt loue thy neighbour as thy selfe . ) Hence is it that the d Prophets , e Apostles , and Christ himselfe doe oft call vpon vs to haue an eie to that affection which we beare to our selues . Of this patterne Christ saith , f This is the Law , and the Prophets , this is the briefe summe of them , this is it which they doe much vrge and presse . 1. Naturall affection was at first created of God , by him planted in man , so that as soule , body , the powers , and parts of them , are in their substance good things , this affection also in it selfe is good . 2. There are the same reasons to loue our selues , as our brethren . For we our selues are made after Gods image , redeemed by Christs bloud , members of the same mysticall bodie , keepers of our selues , to giue an account of the good or hurt we doe to our selues , with the like . In the Law , vnder this word neighbour , our selues are comprised : and euery commandement of the second table is to be applied to our selues . §. 57. Of naturall selfe-loue . Obiect . Louers of themselues are condemned in Gods word , as 2 Tim. 3. 2. Phil. 2. 21. 1 Cor. 10. 24. Rom. 15. 1. Answ . There is a double louing of a mans selfe . One good and commendable : The other euill , and damnable . Good and commendable louing of a mans selfe is 1. Naturall . 2. Spirituall .   That which is naturall is in all by the very instinct of nature : and it was at first created , and still is by Gods prouidence preserued in our nature , and that for the preseruation of nature . Were there not such a naturall loue of himselfe in euery one , man would be as carelesse of himselfe , as of others , and as loth to take paines for himselfe , as for others . Wherefore that euery one might haue care at least of one , euen of himselfe , and so the world be better preserued , God hath reserued in man this naturall affection , notwithstanding his corruption by sin . Yea further because euery one is not able to looke to himselfe , at least when he is young , sicke , old , or any other way impotent , God by his wise prouidence hath extended this naturall affection towards otheralso as they are neerely linked vnto vs by the bonds of nature . The next to a mans selfe are ( by bloud and bond of nature ) children . Admirably much is that which parents doe for their children , which they would neuer doe , if there were not a naturall affection in them to their children . From children againe this affection ariseth towards their parents , that when parents grow old , impotent , or any way vnable to helpe themselues , they might haue succour from their children . And because parents and children are not alwaies together , or not able to helpe one another , or vnnaturall , God hath yet further extended this naturall affection to brethren , cousins , and other kindred . And for a further extent thereof hath instituted mariage betwixt such as are not of the same bloud , and by vertue of that bond raised a naturall affection not only in husband and wife one to another , but also in all the alliance that is made therby . Moreouer this affection is wrought in neighbours , friends , fellowes , and other by like bonds knit together , that the bow of Gods prouidence might haue many strings , and if one breake , another might hold . In all these kinds , the neerer a man commeth to himselfe , the more doth this affection shew it selfe , according to the prouerbe , Neare is my coat , but nearer is my skin . God hauing wrought this naturall affection in the seuerall kindes thereof , and there being good ends and vses thereof , it is not to be condemned . §. 58. Of spirituall selfe-loue . Spirituall selfe-loue is that which is supernaturally wrought in man by Gods Spirit : whereby he is both inlightned to discerne what is most excellent , and best for him , and also moued to choose the same : so as this serueth to rectifie the former . Hence it commeth to passe that their chiefest care is for their soules , and for the eternall saluation thereof : for the furthering whereof they can be content as need requireth , to f beat downe their body , to g denie them sometimes their ordinary refreshing by food , rest , and other like meanes , yea and to h suffer them to be imprisoned , racked , and otherwaies tortured , and life it selfe to be taken from them . This men doe , and suffer , not for want of naturall affection , but by reason of spirituall affection which perswades them that it is good for them it should be so , A man is not therefore to be said not to loue the health and safety of his body because he loueth something more . For a couetous man though he loue his money , yet he can be content to part with it for bread to nourish his body : so a spirituall man though he loue his life , yet he can be content to lose it for his soules saluation . For he loueth himselfe sufficiently , who doth his best to enioy the chiefest and truest good . This spirituall affection extendeth it selfe as farre as , naturall affection , namely to wiues , husbands , children , parents , brethren , cosins , friends , &c. Much is this vrged and pressed in the Scriptures , as Isa . 55. 1 , 2 , 3. Mat. 6. 19 , 20 , 33. Ioh. 6. 27. 1 Tim. 6. 11 , 19. §. 59. Of euill selfe-loue . The selfe-loue which is euill swerueth in the Obiect . Measure .   1. In the Obiect , when it is cast vpon our corruptions , our lusts , our euill humors : when we affect and loue them , and for them pursue whatsoeuer may satisfie them : as the ambitious , lustfull , riotous , gluttonous , and other like persons . This is expresly forbidden , Make not prouision for the flesh to fulfill the lusts thereof . 2. In the Measure , when our loue is wholly and only cast vpon our selues , so seeking our owne good , as we regard no mans good but our owne : nor care what dammage another receiueth , so we may get aduantage thereby . This is also forbidden : for it is contrary to the property of true loue , which seeketh not her owne , namely to the preiudice of another . This hath the title of * Selfe-loue appropriated to it . It sprang from the corruption of nature , and is daily increased by the instigation of Satan for the destruction of mankinde . It manifesteth it selfe by the many tricks of deceit which most men vse in their dealings with others : by making aduantage of others necessities as in the case of vsurie , of raising corne , and other commodities in time of scarcity , with the like : by mens backwardnesse to helpe such as stand in need of their succour : by want of compassion in other mens miseries : and by many other like vnkindnesses : all which verifie the prouerbe , Euery man for himselfe . But by distinguishing the forenamed points we may see that notwithstanding euill self-loue be a most detestable vice , yet it is both lawfull and commendable to loue ones selfe aright . §. 60. Of the error of Stoicks in condemning all passion . The doatage of Stoicks who would haue all naturall affection rooted out of man , is contrary to this patterne , and vnworthy to finde any entertainment among Christians : for what doe they aime at , but to root that out of man , which God hath planted in him , and to take away the meanes which God hath vsed for the better preseruation of man ? That wise man whom they frame to themselues is worse then a brute beast : he is a very stocke and blocke . Not only the best and wisestmen that euer were in the world , but also Christ himselfe had those passions and affections in him , which they account vnbeseeming a wise man. Their doatage hath long since beene hissed out of the schooles of Philosophers , should it then finde place in Christs Church ? §. 61. Of well vsing naturall affection . Let vs labour to cherish this naturall affection in vs , and to turne it to the best things , euen to such as are not only apparently , but indeed good : and among good things to such as are most excellent , and the most necessary : such as concerne our soules , and eternall life . For this end we must pray to haue our vnderstandings inlightned ( that we may discerne things that differ , and approue that which is excellent ) and to haue our wills and affections sanctified , that we embrace , pursue , and delight in that which we know to be the best . Thus shall our naturall affection be turned into a spirituall affection . Here we see how we may make nature a schoolemaster vnto vs : for as Christ sendeth vs to the fowles of the aire , and lillies of the field to learne of them , so the Apostle here sendeth vs to our owne naturall instinct . We cannot complaine that we haue no schoolemaster neere vs ( as many in the country whose children for want of one are rudely brought vp ) our selues are schoolemasters to our selues . Wherfore as the Apostle hereby teacheth husbands to loue their wiues , so let vs all more generally learne to loue one another : for m we are all mutuall members of one and the same body : and our brother or neighbour is n Our flesh . §. 62. Of Mans forbearing to wrong himselfe . EPHES. 5. 29. For no man euer yet hated his owne flesh : but nourisheth and cherisheth it . THe first particle ( for ) sheweth that in this verse an euidence and manifestation of a mans loue of himselfe is giuen . The first part thereof , which is set downe negatiuely , sheweth that It is against the common instinct of nature for a man to hate himselfe . It is noted as an euidence that deuils were in the Gadarene , in that he cut himselfe with stones : had not the deuils forced him , he would neuer haue done it . Hatred is contrary to loue : it being therefore before proued that euery man by nature loueth himselfe , by necessary consequence it followeth , that no man hateth his flesh : for two contrary effects proceed not from the same cause : no fountaine can yeeld both salt water and fresh . Obiect . Many doe macerate their bodies with fastings , watchings , labours , trauels , and the like : others teare and gash their flesh with whips , kniues , swords , yea and with their teeth also : others lay such violent hands vpon themselues , as they take away their owne liues . Answ . 1. None of these things are done by the instinct of nature which God hath set in man , but through the corruption of nature which the deuill hath caused . Now nature and corruption of nature are two contrarie causes : no maruell then that contrarie effects come from them . 2. They thinke they doe these things in loue to themselues ; as superstitious persons to merit saluation , by macerating their bodie : others to free themselues from ignominie , penurie , slauerie , torment , or such like euils : so as there is an apparent good that maketh them so to doe , and not simply hatred of themselues . They that so doe , are either possessed with a Deuill , or blinded in their minde , or bereaued of their wits , or ouerwhelmed with some passion , so as they know not what they doe : they doe it not therefore in hatred . 2. Obiect . Holy and wise men deliberately , and on good aduice , haue beaten downe their bodies , and yeelded their liues to be taken away , not accepting deliuerance . Answ . That was farre from hatred , and in great loue to themselues , as was shewed * before . §. 63. Of vnnaturall practises against ones selfe . The forenamed doctrine discouereth many practises vsed by sundry men to be against nature , and in that respect most horrible and detestable . 1. The practise of the idolatrous Baalites , who to moue their I doll to heare them , cut themselues with kniues and lancers , till the bloud gushed out vpon them . Not much vnlike to whom are Popish Eremites , Anchorites , Monks flagellants , Grandimontenses , sundrie sorts of Franciscans , and other Friers , whereof some weare shirts of haire-cloth , some shirts of maile next their bodie , some goe bare-foot , some daily whip themselues till bloud follow , and some waste their bodies with lying hard , watching , fasting , going on pilgrimage , &c. 2. The practise of Gluttons , Drunkards , vnchaste and voluptuous persons , who to satisfie their corrupt humours , impaire their health , pull diseases vpon them , and shorten their dayes . 3. The practise of Swaggerers , who by quarrels cause their flesh to be wounded , and their liues taken away . Among these may be reckoned such as bring themselues to great straits , distresses , and dangers for lucre sake : and they who by felonie , treason , and the like euill deeds , cast themselues vpon the sword of the Magistrate . 4. The practise of them that giue the reines to griefe , feare , wrath , and other like violent passions , so as thereby they weaken their bodies , and shorten their dayes . 5. The practise of selfe-murtherers : who herein breake the rule of loue ( as thy selfe ) and end their dayes in a most horrible sinne , depriuing themselues of the time , place , and meanes of repentance : so as , whatsoeuer fond pretence they make for their sinne , little better can be thought of them , then that they thrust their soules headlong into hell , vnlesse the Lord betwixt the act done , and the expiration of their breath , extraordinarily touch their hearts . Religion , nature , sense , and all abhorre this fearefull fact : so as not only those who haue beene enlightned by Gods word , but also the Heathen , who had no other then the light of nature , haue adiudged it to be a most desperate sinne . §. 64. Of haters of others . 2. By that affection which nature moueth men to beare to their flesh , we may see how nature more preuailes with men , then conscience and obedience to Gods word , yea then the Spirit : for where nature keepeth all men from hating their owne flesh , nothing can keepe many husbands from hating their wiues , and wiues their husbands ; nor brothers , cosens , & neighbours ( yet these are our owne flesh ) no nor many of those who professe themselues to be of the mysticall bodie of Christ , from hating one another . What shall we say of these ? Is nature of greater power , and more mightie in operation then the Spirit ? Surely , such either deceiue themselues and others , in pretending to be members of the bodie of Christ : or else the Spirit is verie weake in them , and the flesh beareth a great sway . Let haters of their brethren thinke of this and bee ashamed . §. 65. Of mans care in prouiding and vsing things needfull for his bodie . The second euidence of that loue which a man beareth to himselfe , is noted in two such branches ( nourisheth and cherisheth ) as comprize * all needfull things vnder them , so as the Apostle implieth thereby , that Nature teacheth all men to prouide such things as are needfull for them : needfull for life , as food : and needfull for health , as apparell . Nature is here propounded as a Schoolemaster to Christians : this therefore which nature teacheth is a bounden dutie . It is much insisted vpon by Salomon , who in this respect saith , It is good and comely for one to eat and drinke , and enioy the good of all his labour . If he be worse then an Infidell that prouideth not for his owne , what is he that prouideth not for himselfe ? euen worse then a beast : for nature hath taught the bruit beasts to nourish and cherish themselues . If any thinke that it more befitteth beasts , or naturall men then Saints , let them tell me which of the Saints at any time guided by Gods Spirit , hath wholly neglected himselfe . To omit all others , it is expresly noted of Christ , that as there was occasion , he p slept , he q eat , he r rested , and otherwise refreshed himselfe . Obiect . Though he were s hungry , and meat prepared for him , yet he refused to eat . Answ . 1. Forbearing one meale , is no great hinderance of cherishing the body . 2. Extraordinarie and weightie occasions may lawfully make a man a little neglect himselfe : that so he may shew he preferreth Gods glorie , and his brothers saluation , before the outward nourishing of his body : to which purpose Christ saith , My meat is to doe the will of him that sent me : that is , I preferre it before my meat . And Saint Paul saith , I will very gladly be spent for your soules . We must here therefore take heed of the extremes on both hands . 1. Of vndue , and ouermuch neglecting our bodies , so as the strength of them be wasted , and the health impaired . 2. Of too much caring for it , so as vpon no occasion we will lose a meales meat , or a nights rest . Fasting and watching as occasion requireth , are bounden duties . But to returne to the point of nourishing and cherishing our flesh . 1. For this end hath God prouided food , apparell , and all things needfull for our weake bodies , that they should be nourished and cherished thereby : not to vse them therefore , is to refuse Gods prouidence . 2. By well nourishing and cherishing our bodies , they are the better enabled to doe that worke and seruice which God appointeth to be done : but by neglecting them , they are disabled thereto . As this is a motiue , so ought it to be an end whereat we aime in nourishing and cherishing our bodies . §. 66. Of them that neglect to cherish their bodies . Against this good instinct of nature doe many offend . 1. Couetous misers , who so doat vpon their wealth , and so delight in abundance of goods treasured vp , as they afford not themselues things needfull to nourish and cherish their bodies . Salomon doth much taxe such : of them he saith , that riches are kept for the owners thereof to their hurt . Daily experience giueth euidence to the truth thereof : for , beside that such men make their riches t to be snares , and u hinderances , to keepe them from eternall life ; they make this present life to be very irksome , x filling their heads full of much carking care , and keeping them from quiet rest . Many in this case are so besotted , as , though they haue abundance , yet they will not in health afford themselues a good meales meat , nor seemly apparell : nor in sicknesse , needfull physicke , no nor fire , and such like common things . Their case is worse then theirs who want : for others will pitie and succour such as want , but who will pitie and succour such ? 2. Such as are too intentiue vpon their businesses , euen the affaires of their lawfull callings ( for in good things there may be excesse ) herein many Students , Preachers , Lawyers , Tradesmen , Farmers , Labourers , and others offend , when they afford not seasonable times of refreshing and resting to their bodies , but fast , watch , and toile too much in their calling . They who by such meanes disable themselues , doe make themselues guiltie of the neglect of so much good as they might haue done , if they had nourished and cherished their bodies . Some are so eager on their businesse , that they thinke all the time mispent , which is spent in nourishing and cherishing their bodies ; and thereupon wish , that their bodies needed no food , sleepe , or other like meanes of refreshing . These thoughts and desires are foolish and sinfull in many respects , as 1. In manifesting a secret discontent and grudging against Gods prouidence , who hath thus disposed our estate for the clearer manifestation of mans weaknes , & Gods care ouer him . 2. In taking away occasions of calling vpon God , and giuing praise vnto him . For if we stood not in such need of Gods prouidence , should we so oft pray vnto him for his blessing : if by the good meanes which he affordeth vnto vs we felt not the sweetnesse and comfort of his prouidence , should we be so thankfull to him ? 3. In taking away the meanes of mutuall loue : for if by reason of our weaknesse we stood not in need of succour and help one from another , what triall would there be of our loue ? 3. Such as sever these two duties of nature ( nourishing and cherishing ) and make them an hinderance one to another : some so nourish their bodies , as they cannot cherish them ; that is , they spend so much in eating and drinking , as they haue nothing to cloath themselues withall . Others so cherish them , as they cannot nourish them ; that is , they so prancke vp themselues with braue apparell aboue their abilitie , as they haue not competent food for themselues . These fall into two contrarie extremes : into the excesse in one thing : and into the defect in another . §. 67. Of contentment in that which is sufficient . As the Apostle by naming these two ( nourish , cherish ) sheweth that both of them are needfull , so by naming them only , and no more but them , he sheweth that they two are sufficient : whence we learne , that Hauing food and raiment , we must be therewith content . The Apostle in these very words laieth downe this doctrine in y another place . The z praier of Agur , and the tenour of the a fourth Petition proue as much . Quest . Is a man then strictly bound to care for no more then food to nourish , and apparell to cherish him ? Answ . So this nourishing and cherishing be extended to that estate wherein God hath set vs , to the charge which God hath giuen vs , and to the calling which he hath appointed unto vs , we ought to care for no more . Let vs therefore take heed of that excesse which ariseth from the corruption of nature , and content our selues with that competency which nature requireth . §. 68. Of Christs forbearing to hate the Church . EPHES. 6. 29. Euen as the Lord the Church . THis confirmation of the patterne of a mans selfe by a like patterne of the Lord , hath relation to both the parts of the manifestation of a mans loue to himselfe : both to the negatiue , and so it sheweth , that The Lord hateth not his Church . And to the affirmatiue , and so it sheweth , that The Lord nourisheth and cherisheth his Church . That difference which is made betwixt Esau a type of the world ( Esau haue I hated ) and Iaakob a type of the Church ( Iaakob haue I loued ) sheweth that the Lord is farre from hating his Church . The world , not the Church , is the obiect of Gods hatred . Obiect . The b Church her selfe , and the c enemies thereof oft conceiue by Christs dealing with her , that he hateth her . Answ . It is the flesh abiding in them that are of the Church which maketh them so to conceiue , not the spirit : and in the enemies of the Church the flesh altogether reigneth . But the things of God , and his minde and affection , nor can , nor may be iudged by carnall eies , eies of flesh . The d Spirit of God accounteth such things euidences of Gods Ioue , which flesh iudgeth to be tokens of hatred ; namely , corrections . It is not , because there is no matter of hatred in the Church , that Christ hateth it not : for by nature all are of one and the same cursed stocke , e children of wrath : and after our sanctification is begun , the flesh abiding in vs , we daily giue much occasion of hatred if Christ should take that aduantage against vs which he might : but it is that neere vnion which Christ hath made betwixt himselfe and the Church that keepeth him from hating her : he hath made her his Spouse , and he will not hate his Spouse : all the occasion of hatred that she giueth , he will either wipe away or couer . Admirable is the comfort which euery true member of the Catholike Church may reape from hence : for so long as the wrath and hatred of the Lord is turned from vs , nothing can make vs miserable : we may in this respect reioyce not only in prosperitie , but also in all manner of affliction . No calamitie can moue Christ to hate his Church , but rather the more to pittie it , as we doe our bodies . Nay , though by sinne he be prouoked , and see it needfull to correct his Church , yet in loue , not in hatred , in mercy , not in wrath will he correct it . What now if all the world have vs ? Seeing Christ hateth vs not , we need not feare nor care . The subiect which is sure of his Kings fauour , little regardeth the hatred of others . This therefore is to be thought of , both to comfort vs vnder the crosse , and to encourage vs against the hatred of the world . That none may peruert this comfortable doctrine , let me adde two caueats . 1. That men deceiue not themselues with a naked name , thinking themselues to be of the Church , when they are only in it , f such may Christ hate . 2. That being of the Church they waxe not insolent , and too much prouoke Christ to anger : for though he hate not such , yet in wisdome he may so seuerely correct them as if he hated them : and make them repent their folly and insolencie againe and againe . §. 69. Of Christs nourishing and cherishing his Church . 2. That The Lord nourisheth and cherisheth his Church , is euident by his continuall prouidence ouer her in all ages . When first he created man , he g prouided before hand all things needfull to nourish and cherish him . When he was moued to destroy the earth and all liuing things thereon , he had care of his Church , and prouided an Arke to keepe her out of the waters , and stored vp in the Arke all things needfull for her . When he purposed to bring a famine on the world , he sent a man before hand to lay vp prouision for his Church . When his Church was in a barren and drie wildernesse , he gaue them bread from heauen , water out of the rocke , and kept their raiment from waxing old , and their feet from swelling . After this he brought his Church into a land flowing with milke and honie : and so long as it remained faithfull he preserued it in that pleasant and plentifull land . Thus he dealt with the Church in her non-age : and thus also hath he dealt with her in her riper age vnder the Gospell , as experience of all ages may witnesse . Neither hath he only nourished and cherished her with temporall blessings , but also with all needfull spirituall blessings : his word and Sacraments , his Spirit and the graces thereof hath he in all ages giuen her for that purpose : yea with his owne flesh and bloud hath he fed her , and with his owne righteousnesse hath he clothed her . Learne we of whom we receiue all needfull things , both spirituall and temporall , for soule and bodie , that accordingly we may giue him the praise of all . And let vs not be like the vngratefull Israelites who m regarded not the meanes of spirituall nourishment , and n ascribed the meanes of their temporall nourishing and cherishing to their Idols . In this respect the Prophet maketh them o worse then the oxe , and the asse , two of the most bruitish beasts that be . Oh take we heed that the like be not vpbraided to vs. The Lord hath not sparingly , but most liberally and bountifully nourished and cherished vs in this land , and that both with temporall and spirituall blessings , so as he may iustly say , what could haue beene done more in my vineyard , that I haue not done in it ? Learne we also to depend on Christ for all things that we want : we need not feare penurie : though we haue not that plentie which we could wish , yet we shall haue sufficiencie . Christ will not suffer his Church to famish for want of food , nor starue for want of cloathing , whether temporall for body , or spirituall for soule . He that can and will performe it hath said , I will neuer leaue thee nor forsake thee . Lazarus was not forsaken ; witnesse the Angels that caried his soule into Abrahams bosome . If any of Christs Church doe perish for want of outward meanes , it is because Christ by that meanes will aduance them to that place where they shall stand in need of nothing : so as he doth not forsake them . §. 70. Of the vnion betwixt Christ and the Saints . EPHES. 5. 30. For we are members of his body , of his flesh , and of his bones . THe reason of the forenamed loue of Christ , and fruits thereof to his Church , is here laid downe , as both the causall particle ( FOR ) and the inference of this verse vpon the former doe shew . This reason is that neere vnion which is betwixt Christ and his Church , set forth by a metaphor of the members of our bodie . Whereby he implieth , that though there were no other reason to moue an husband to loue his wife then the neere vnion which is betwixt them ( they being a one bodie , b one flesh , c one selfe ) that were enough , for thereby only is Christ moued to loue his Church . The mysterie of our spirituall vnion with Christ is here laid downe , and that as fully , and distinctly ( though very succinctly ) as in any place of Scripture . I will endeuour to open it as plainly as I can . We are ] The Apostle here changeth both person and number : for before he spake of the Church as of another in the third person , and of one in the singular number : but here he speaketh of the same in the first person including himselfe , and in the plurall number , including all others like himselfe ( elect of God , and Saints by calling ) whereby he giueth vs to vnderstand what he meaneth by the Church , namely the companie of Saints , to which , though he were a Preacher of the Gospell , an extraordinarie Preacher , an Apostle , he associateth and ioyneth himselfe : noting thereby that he was made partaker of the same grace , and saued by the same meanes that others were . Well might he in this priuiledge not thinke much to ranke himselfe , because it is the highest degree of honour that can be to be a member of the bodie of Christ : much more then to be a Preacher , a Prophet , an Apostle , or of any other eminent calling . The metaphor here vsed ( members of his body ) setteth forth the neere vnion which is betwixt Christ and the Saints . Many other metaphors are vsed in Scripture for the same purpose , as a foundation and edifice , b vine and branches , c husband and wife , with the like , which are all of them very fit , but none more proper and pertinent to the point then this of a body , the Head and members thereof . What neerer vnion can there be then betwixt the head and members of the same body ? If the Apostle had here staid , we might haue thought that he had here meant no other thing then he meant d before , where he stiled Christ an head , and the Church a body : but in that he addeth ( Of his flesh and of his bones ) he declareth yet a further mysterie . In the generall there is a difference betwixt this phrase ( e OF his body ) and these ( OF f his flesh ; and OF his bones ) the former is a note of the g genetiue case , the two latter are a h praeposition : for distinction sake the two latter might haue beene translated , out of his flesh , out of his bones , or from his flesh , from his bones ( for so a like phrase is translated i before , From whom ) but seeing these particles out of , or from are ambiguous , the former translation may stand as the best , so as a difference be made in the sense though there be none in the words . The former ( members of his body ) declareth the vnion it selfe . The latter ( of his flesh and of his bones ) declareth the meanes of making that vnion . This latter hath relation to that which Adam said of Eue , This is now bone of my bones , and flesh of my flesh , ( Gen. 2. 23. ) which is manifest by the next verse which the Apostle taketh out of the same place . It implieth then , that as Eue was made a woman out of Adams flesh and bones , so the Church is made a Church out of Christs flesh and bones . 1. Quest . Was the very substance of the Saints , their flesh and bones taken out of Christ , as the substance of Eue was taken out of Adam ? Answ . Not so , if the words be literally taken . For so may Christ rather be said to be of our flesh , and of our bones , because he tooke our nature , and that from a daughter of Adam : in which respect he is said to be f of the seed of Dauid , and g of the Iewes , as concerning the flesh . Besides , the Apostle expresly saith ( vers . 32. ) that This is a great mysterie . The mysterie therefore must be searched out . For this end Christ must be considered as another Adam ( and so the holy Ghost stileth him h The last Adam , The second man ) that is , a stocke , a root that giueth a being to branches sprouting out of him . 2. Quest . What being is that which we receiue from Christ ? Answ . Not our naturall being ( that we haue of the parents of our flesh ) but a supernaturall , and spirituall being , which the Scripture termeth i a new birth , k a new man , l a new creature . This spirituall being is not in regard of the substance of our soule , or bodie , or of any of the powers or parts , faculties or members of them ( for all these we haue by lineall descent from Adam , and all these haue all sorts of men , as well they who are not of the Church , as they who are of it ) but in regard of the integritie , goodnesse , and diuine qualities which are in them euen that holinesse and righteousnesse wherewith the Church is endued and adorned . As we are naturall men we are of Adam , as we are spirituall men we are of Christ . 3. Quest . Why is mention made of flesh and bones in this spirituall being ? Answ . 1. In allusion to the creation of Eue , that by comparing this with that , this might be the better conceiued . 2. In regard of the Lords Supper , where the flesh of Christ is mystically set before vs to be spirituall food vnto vs. That as before ( vers . 26. ) he shewed the mysterie of one Sacrament , Baptisme ; here he might shew the mysterie of the other Sacrament , The Lords Supper . 3. In relation to Christs humane nature , by vertue whereof we come to be vnited vnto Christ . For the diuine nature of Christ is infinite , incomprehensible , incommunicable , and there is no manner of proportion betwixt it and vs , so as we could not be vnited to it immediately . But Christ by taking his humane nature into the vnitie of his diuine nature , made himselfe one with vs , and vs one with him : so as by his partaking of our mortalitie , we are made partakers of his immortalitie . 4. Quest . Are we then vnited only to his humane nature ? Answ . No : we are vnited to his person , God-Man . For as the diuine nature , in and by it selfe , is incommunicable ; so the humane nature singly considered , in and by it selfe , is vnprofitable . The Deitie is the fountaine of all life and grace : the flesh quickneth not : but that spirituall life which originally and primarily floweth from the Deitie , as from a fountaine , is by the humanitie of Christ , as by a conduit-pipe , conueyed into vs. 5. Quest . How can we who are on earth , be vnited to his humane nature , which is contained in the highest heauen ? Answ . This vnion being supernaturall and spirituall , there needeth no locall presence for the making of it . That eternall Spirit which is in Christ is conueyed into euerie of the Saints ( as the soule of a man is into euerie member and part of his bodie ) by vertue whereof they are all made one with Christ , and with one another : by one Spirit we are all baptized into one bodie , which bodie is Christ . This is to be noted against these two errours . The first is this , We are vnited first to the diuine nature of Christ which is euerie where , and by vertue thereof to his humane nature . Answ . 1. The Deitie ( as we shewed ) is immediately incommunicable : so as this cannot be . 2. Our vnion with Christ is spirituall , not physicall or naturall , so as this locall presence needeth not . The second errour is this , The humane nature of Christ hath all the diuine properties in it , so as it is euerie where present , and by reason thereof we are vnited vnto Christ . Answ . This also is impossible and needlesse . The properties of a true bodie cannot possibly admit the incommunicable properties of the Deitie : that implieth direct contradiction , which is , that finite should be infinite . Needlesse also this is , because the vnion we speake of , is ( as we said ) spirituall . 6. Quest . What kinde of vnion is this spirituall vnion ? Answ . A true , reall vnion of our persons ( bodies and soules ) with the person of Christ ( God and man. ) For as the holy Ghost did vnite in the virgins wombe the diuine and humane natures of Christ , and made them one person , by reason wherof Christ is of our flesh & of our bones : so the spirit vniteth that person of Christ with our persons , by reason whereof we are of his flesh , and of his bones . A great difference there is betwixt the kindes of these vnions : for the vnion of Christs two natures is hypostaticall and essentiall , they make one person : but the vnion of Christs person , and ours , is spirituall and mysticall : they make one mysticall body : yet is there no difference in the reality and truth of these vnions : our vnion with Christ is neuer a whit the lesse reall and true because it is mysticall and spirituall : they who haue the same spirit ar● as truly one , as those parts which haue the same soule . The effects which proceed from this vnion doe shew the truth thereof : for that spirit which sanctified Christ in his mothers wombe sanctifieth vs also , that which quickned him quickneth vs , that which raised him from death , raiseth vs , that which exalted him exalteth vs. The many resemblances which the Scripture vseth to set forth this vnion , doe shew the truth thereof : but most liuely is it set forth by that resemblance which Christ maketh betwixt it and his vnion with his Father . I pray ( saith he of all his Saints ) That they may all be one , as thou Father art in me , and I in thee , that they also may be one in vs : that they may be one , as we are one . This note of comparison ( as ) is not to be taken of the kinde , but of the truth of these vnions , our vnion with Christ is as true as Christs vnion with his Father . So true is this vnion , as not only Iesus himselfe , but all the Saints which are members of this body together with Iesus the head thereof are called CHRIST , 1 Cor. 12. 12. Gal. 3. 16. This is to be noted against their conceit , who imagine this vnion to be only in imagination and conceit : or else only in consent of spirit , heart , and will : or at the most , in participation of spirituall graces . 7. Quest . What is the bond whereby this vnion is made : namely whereby Christ and the Saints are made one ? Answ . There is a double bond , one on Christs part , euen the spirit of Christ ( for hereby know we that we dwell in him , and he in vs , because he hath giuen vs of his spirit ) another on the Saints part , euen faith ( for Christ dwelleth in our hearts by faith ) The spirit is conueyed into vs when we are dead in sinnes , wholly flesh , but being in vs , it breedeth this blessed instrument of faith whereby we lay hold on Christ , and grow into him as the science into the stocke . Thus Christ laying hold on vs by his spirit , and we on him by faith , we come to be incorporated into him , and made one body , as the science and stocke one tree . 8. Quest . To what end hath Christ thus truly and neerely vnited vs vnto himselfe ? Answ . Not for any benefit vnto himselfe : but meerely for the honour and good of the Church . By this vnion the honour of Christ is communicated to the Church , as the honour of an husband to his wife , and of an head to the body . Great also is the benefit which the Church reapeth thereby : for by this meanes is Christ made more fit to doe good to the Church , as an head to the body , and the Church is made more capable of receiuing good from Christ , as a body from the head , being knit to it by the soule , and by veines , sinewes , nerues , arteries , and other like ligaments . Thus hauing as plainly as I can by questions and answers laid open this great mysterie , I will further note out some of those excellent priuiledges which by vertue thereof appertaine to the Saints , and also some of the principall duties which in regard thereof the Saints are bound vnto . §. 71. Of the priuiledges appertaining to the Saints euen in this life by reason of their vnion with Christ . The priuiledges of the Saints which arise from their vnion with Christ respect this life , the time of death , and the life to come . In this life these , 1. A most glorious condition , which is to be a part of Christ , a member of his body . All the glory of Adam in Paradise , or of the Angels in heauen is not comparable to this . In this respect the Saints are said to be crowned with glory and honour , and to haue all things put vnder their feet . Compare Psal . 8. 4 , 5. &c. with Heb. 2. 6 , 7. &c. and ye shall finde the Apostle apply that to Christ , which the Prophet spake indefinitly of man. Now those two places cannot be better reconciled , then by this vnion of Christ and Saints : for seeing both make one body , which is Christ , that which is spoken of the body may be applied to the head , and that which is spoken of the head may be applied to the body : for the same honour appertaineth to both . In which respect the Church is more honourable then Heauen , Angels , and euery other creature . 2. The attendance of good Angels , who are sent forth to minister for them who shall be heires of saluation , because those heires are of the body of Christ , who is their Lord. These are those horses , and charets of fire which were round about Elisha : which are also round about euery of Gods Saints in all their distresses , though we see them no more then the seruant of the man of God saw them , till the Lord opened his eies . That charge which is giuen to the Angels ouer the Sonne of God to keepe him in all his waies , and to beare him in their hands lest he dash his foot against a stone , hath relation to this body which is Christ . 3. An honour to make Christ himselfe perfect : for as the seuerall members make a naturall body perfect , so the seuerall Saints , this bodie which is Christ . In this respect the Church is said to be the fulnesse of him that filleth all in all . Christ filleth all things , and yet the Church maketh him full : which is to be vnderstood of that voluntary condition whereunto Christ subiected himselfe , to be the head of a body : so as without the parts of the body he is imperfect , as a naturall body is maimed and imperfect if it want but the least member thereof . How can we now thinke but that he will preserue and keepe safe all his Saints ? Will he restore to vs all the parts of our naturall body at the generall resurrection , and will he lose any of the parts of his owne mysticall bodie ? 4. A kinde of possession of heauen while we are on earth : for that which the head hath a possession of , the body and seuerall members haue also a possession of . In this respect it is said , he hath raised vs vp together , and made vs sit together in heauenly places . And , he that beleeueth on him hath euerlasting life : is passed from death vnto life . And , he that hath the Sonne , hath life . This is somewhat more then hope : and serueth exceedingly to strengthen our hope , and giue vs assurance of that heauenly inheritance . They know not the power of God , nor the vertue of this vnion , who denie that the Saints haue assurance of saluation . For ( to follow this metaphor a little ) suppose a man were cast into a riuer , and his head able to lift and keepe it selfe aboue water , would we not say , that man is safe enough , he is aboue water . This is the case of this mysticall body : it being cast into the sea of this world , Christ the head thereof hath lift , and keepes himselfe aloft euen in heauen . Is there now any feare , any possibility of the drowning of this body , or of any member thereof ? If any should be drowned , then either Christ must be drowned , or else that member pulled from Christ ; both which are impossible . Thus then by vertue of this vnion we see how on Christs safety , ours dependeth : if he be safe , so are we : if we perish , so must he . In this respect yee may be secure O flesh and bloud : yee haue got heauen in Christ : they who denie heauen to you , may also denie Christ to be in heauen . Learne here how to conceiue of the resurrection , ascension and safety of Christ , euen as of the resurrection , ascension and safety of an head , in and with whom his body and all his members are raised , exalted , and preserued . 5. A most happy kinde of regiment vnder which the Saints are : euen such an one as the members of an head are vnder . An head ruleth the body not as a cruell lord and tyrant , rigorously , in humanely , basely , and slauishly , but meekely , gently , with great compassion , and fellow-feeling . Euen so doth Christ , his Church , binding vp that which is broken , healing that which is maimed , directing that which wandreth , and quickning that which is dull ; which priuiledge is so much the greater because it is proper to the Church . Though he haue a golden scepter of grace and fauour to hold out to his Church ( as Ahash-verosh held out his to Esther ) yet he hath also a rod of iron to breake the men of this world , and to dash them in peeces like a potters vessell . Though he be gone to prepare a place for his Saints , that where he is they may be also , yet will he make his enemies his footstoole . 6. An assurance of sufficient supply of all needfull things which the Saints want , and of safe protection from all things hurtfull . For by reason of this vnion , Christ our head hath a sense of our want and of our smart . On this ground he said to them which fed and visited his members , Ye fed me , ye visited me : and againe , to Saul that persecuted his members , Saul , Saul , why persecutest thou me ? Obiect . How is it then , that the Saints want many things , and oft suffer much smart , and hurt ? Answ . Christ in his wisdome seeth it behouefull that they should want , and feele smart ( and that we are to be perswaded of ) or else he would not suffer them to want or feele that which they doe . Wherefore in all need , in euery distresse and danger , let vs lift vp our head to this our head . 7. A right to all that Adam lost . For Christ is the heire of all , ( the earth is the Lords , and the fulnesse thereof ) yea as mediator and head of the Church is he heire of all : his body therfore hath a right to all . On this ground the Apostle saith , All things are yours . So as the Saints & only the Saints can with good conscience vse the things of this world . They who are not of this bodie ( what right and title soeuer they haue before men ) are but vsurpers of the things they enioy and vse . They are like to bankrupts , who being not worth one peny , deceitfully borrow of others , and therewith keepe a great table , decke and furnish their houses very sumptuously , put themselues , wiues and children , into braue apparell , are frolicke and riotous : what is like to be the end of such ? 8. A right to more then Adam euer had : namely , to Christ himselfe , and to all that appertaineth vnto him : as to the puritie of his nature , to the perfection of his obedience , the merit of his bloud , the power of his death , the vertue of his resurrection , the efficacie of his ascension , all is ours : euen as the vnderstanding , wit , iudgement , sight , hearing , and all that is in the head , is the bodies : if the Church it selfe were of it selfe as pure in nature , as perfect in righteousnesse , as powerfull ouer death , and deuill , and graue , and hell , as able to rise from death , and to ascend into heauen , as Christ , it could receiue no greater benefit thereby , then it doth by them in the person of Christ : so truly and properly is Christ himselfe , and all things appertaining to him , the Churches . What can more be said ? what can more be desired ? O blessed vnion ! blessed are they that haue a part therein ! Quest . How is it then that the Church is so basely and miserably respected in the world ? Answ . The world knoweth vs not , because it knoweth not Christ . It knoweth not Christ the head of this body : it knoweth not the body which is Christ . Let not vs who know both head and body , the neere vnion which is betwixt them , and the priuiledges which follow thereupon , be danted , neither with the scoffes or scornes of the world , nor with our owne outward weaknesses , wants , and calamities . What would he that hath Christ , haue more ? §. 72. Of the priuiledge of our vnion with Christ in the time of death . The priuiledge which the Saints receiue by their vnion with Christ in the time of death ( euen all that time that passeth from the departure of the Saints out of this world vnto the generall Resurrection ) is admirable : for when body and soule are seuered one from another , neither soule nor body are separated from Christ , but both remaine vnited to him : euen as , when Christs body and soule were by death seuered one from another , neither his soule , nor his body were separated from the Deitie , but both remained vnited thereunto . This inuiolable bond that holdeth the Saints , ( yea , euen their very bodies as well as their soules ) vnited to Christ in death , is the benefit of a spirituall vnion . If our vnion with Christ were corporeall , it could not be so . Ob. Is it possible that the body which is dead should remaine vnited to Christ , when as it receiueth no vertue from him ? Answ . 1. If a member of a naturall body may doe so , why not a member of the mysticall bodie ? That a member of a naturall body may doe so , is euident by those who haue an hand , arme , foot , leg , or any other member taken , with a dead palsie : they are sometimes so taken , as those parts receiue no manner of sense , or any vigor , or life from head or heart at all : and yet remaine true members of that body . 2. The very dead bodies consumed with wormes or otherwise , doe receiue a great present benefit from their vnion with Christ : for by vertue thereof there is a substance preserued , and they are kept from destruction : there is nothing destroied in the Saints by death , but that which if it were not destroied , would make them most miserable , namely sinne : that is vtterly , totally , finally destroied in them , and all the concomitances thereof , which are all manner of infirmities : but the rotting of the body , is but as the rotting of corne in the earth , that it may arise a more glorious bodie . The metaphor of sleepe , attributed to the Saints when they die , sheweth that their bodies are not vtterly destroied . Obiect . The bodies of all men , euen of those that are not of this vnion , are preserued from vtter destruction . This therefore is no benefit of our vnion with Christ . Answ . Though in the generall thing it selfe , which is a preseruation of the substance of the body , the same thing befalleth the Saints and the wicked : yet the meanes whereby both are preserued , and the end why they are preserued is farre different . 1. The Saints are preserued by a secret influence proceeding from Christ , as an head : in which respect they are said to sleepe in Iesus , and to be dead in Christ . But the wicked are reserued by an Almightie power of Christ , as a terrible Lord and seuere Iudge . 2. The bodies of the Saints are preserued to enioy eternall glory together with their soules : but the bodies of the wicked are reserued to be tormented in hell . In regard of these differēces , the graue is as a bed to the Saints , for them quietly to sleepe therein free from all disturbance till the day of resurrection : but it is a prison to the wicked to hold them fast against the great Day of Assise , that at Doomes day they may be brought to appeare at the barre of Gods iudgement seat , and there receiue the sentence of condemnation . §. 73. Of the priuiledge of our vnion with Christ after death . The priuiledge which the Saints by vertue of their vnion with Christ receiue after death , farre surpasseth all before . It may be drawne to two heads . 1. Their Resurrection . 2. Their glory in heauen . That which was before said of the difference betwixt the preseruation of the bodies of the Saints and wicked in death , may be applied to the difference of their Resurrection . Resurrection simply in it selfe is not the priuiledge of the Saints , but Resurrection of life : to the wicked appertaineth the Resurrection of condemnation . The benefit of Resurrection ariseth from the glory which followeth therupon in heauen . That glory hath the Apostle excellently set forth * before vers . 27. §. 74. Of the duties which are required of the Saints by vertue of their union with Christ . The mysterie of our vnion with Christ , as it is a matter of great comfort , and incouragement ( which ariseth from the forenamed priuiledges ) so also is it a matter of direction and instigation vnto vs for the performing of sundry duties , whereof they who desire assurance of the forenamed priuiledges , and comfort by them , must be carefull and conscionable . Some of the most principall of those duties are these . 1. Confidence in Christ . Christ being our head , so mighty , so wise , so tender , euery way so sufficient an head as he is , we should highly dishonour him , if we should not wholly and only repose our selues vpon him for euery good thing , and against euery euill . 2. Subiection answerable to his manner of gouerning vs. The world is subiect to Christ perforce , as he is an absolute and Almighty Lord : but he gouerning vs as an head , we must be subiect vnto him as members , willingly , and readily . What member will rise vp , and rebell against the head ? yea , what member is not as ready to obey , as the head to command ? 3. A cleansing of our selues from all filthinesse of flesh and spirit . Shall we defile the members of Christ ? The sinnes of the Saints are in this respect the more hainous because that body , euen Christ , whereof they are members , is defiled thereby . Wherefore in regard of Christ the head , of other Saints their fellow members , and of themselues , must all that professe themselues to be of this bodie be watchfull ouer themselues , and cleanse themselues from all filthinesse . Otherwise they giue iust occasion to thinke that they are no members of this bodie . If a Lions foot , or Beares paw were held out , and said to be the member of a man , would any beleeue it ? Can we then thinke that worldlings , drunkards , profane , riotous , vncleane persons , and such like limbs of the Deuill , are members of Christ ? 4. A conformitie vnto the image of Christ in true holinesse and righteousnesse . It is not therefore sufficient for the members of Christ to abstaine from polluting themselues , for they are created in Christ Iesus vnto good works . He that abideth in me ( saith Christ ) and I in him , the same bringeth forth much fruit . 5. Heauenly affections . If ye be risen with Christ , seeke those things which are aboue , where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affections on things aboue , and not on things on the earth . Where our head is , there also ought our heart to be . Earthly affections come not from that head which is in heauen : nor from that Spirit which proceedeth from him . They who are after the spirit minde the things of the spirit . 6. Courage against death : seeing that in death we are Christs , what cause haue we to feare death ? Be not afraid of them that kill the body , and after that , haue no more that they can doe . The ancient worthies would not accept deliuerance , that they might obtaine a better resurrection . Hitherto of the vnion it selfe . The meanes of effecting it , remaine to be handled . § 75. Of their regeneration who are members of Christ . EPHES. 5. 30. — Of his flesh , and of his bones . This clause declareth the meanes whereby we come to be members of Christ , namely by receiuing a new being from Christ , which is to be , not of the flesh , and of the bones of Adam , but of the flesh and of the bones of Christ , which being spiritually taken , as hath beene expounded * before , sheweth that They who are true members of Christ body , are truly regenerate . If any be in Christ he is a new creature : these words are so laid downe by the Apostle , as they serue both for a demonstration , and an exhortation ( he is , or let him be a new creature ) neither is expressed , but either , or both may be vnderstood . As many of you as have been baptized into Christ ( that is , made members of this body ) haue put on Christ , ( that is , haue beene borne againe ) the first branch noteth out our incorporation into Christ , the latter our regeneration . This second man , and last Adam Christ Iesus is a quickning spirit : he diffuseth life and grace into all his members : if his spirit be in vs , it will quicken our mortall bodies . If the head of our naturall bodies conueigh sense into all our members : if the root of a tree diffuse sap into all the branches : shall not Christ much more giue life to all his members ? This then is a matter of triall , whereby we may proue whether indeed we are of this body or no , and so haue a true right to the forenamed priuiledges . Many boast of this honour that they are members of Christs body , and yet are not of his flesh and of his bones : they haue no other being , then what they receiued from their parents . These vaine professors are like woodden legs , or armes on a man , which may be couered ouer with hose and sleeues for a time , but shall not be raised at the resurrection with the other parts of the mans body : so neither shall those professors be raised to glory with Christ , though they may be couered ouer with the hose and sleeues of profession , and thereby seeme to be members . §. 76. Of the author of our regeneration Christ . This relatiue particle ( HIS ) twice repeated ( of HIS flesh , and of HIS bones ) sheweth that Regeneration is of Christ . * The Sonne quickneth whom he will. Object . This worke is attributed in Scripture to the a Father , to the b Spirit , to the c word , and to the d Ministers of the word . Answ . Christ may very well stand with all these . The three persons in Trinitie are all one : One in nature and essence : One in will and consent : One in vertue and power : what the one doth the other doth also . Yet because there is a difference in their manner of working , this worke ( as other workes ) is distinctly attributed to each of them . The Father is ( as I may so speake ) the beginner of this worke . His will it was that his Sonne should be the head of a bodie , and that there should members be made fit for that head , and haue a new being ( of his owne will begat he vs ) for this end he sent his Sonne into the world to be made flesh . The Sonne put in execution the will of his Father : he tooke flesh vpon him , that we might be of his flesh . Thus saith Christ of himselfe , I came downe from heauen to doe the will of him that sent me ; And this is the Fathers will which hath sent me , that of all which he hath giuen me I should lose nothing , but should raise it vp againe at the last day . The Spirit applieth vnto vs the vertue and efficacie of the flesh of Christ , and so finisherh this blessed worke . It is the Spirit that quickneth : the flesh profiteth nothing , namely , of it selfe without the Spirit . Thus we see that the applying of this worke of regeneration vnto Christ , excludeth not the worke of the Father , or of the Holy Ghost therein , but excludeth the worke of man : so as it is not of our selues , nor of our parents , nor of any other man : for we are borne not of bloud , nor of the will of the flesh , nor of the will of man , but of God : in which respect our new birth is said to be * from aboue . Obiect . How is it then attributed to the word , and to the ministerie of man ? Answ . As vnto instruments which the Lord is pleased to vse : Of the word it is said , God hath begotten vs with the word : of himselfe a Minister thus saith the Apostle , In Christ Iesus I haue begotten you : so as God and Christ are ioyned with these instruments , or else they are no whit powerfull and effectuall for so great a worke : for neither is he that planteth any thing , nor he that watreth : but God that giueth the increase . The worke of regeneration is a new creation , a diuine worke , aboue humane straine . It must therefore be wrought by the Lord , or it cannot be wrought at all . This is to be noted both of those that haue not yet assurance of this blessed worke wrought in them : and also of those who haue assurance thereof . The former may here learne whither to haue recourse for it : namely , to him who came downe from heauen for that purpose , and who saith , Him that commeth vnto me I will in no wise cast out . In all the meanes that we vse , let vs looke vp vnto him , and seeke a blessing of him . The latter must with the tenth leper returne backe vnto Christ , and glorifie God. Whatsoeuer the meanes were , or whosoeuer the Minister was , the praise and glorie of all must be giuen to him . §. 77. Of the matter of our regeneration , Christ . The preposition ( OF ) twice set downe ( OF his flesh , and OF his bones ) being a proper note of the materiall cause , sheweth that Christ is not only the author , but the matter also of our new birth . The new spirituall being which the Saints haue , commeth out of him . a From him all the bodie hauing nourishment increaseth with the increase of God. In this respect we are said to be b blessed with all spirituall blessings in Christ . The metaphor of a c vine , which Christ taketh vnto himselfe , proueth also as much : so doe these phrases , d My flesh is meat indeed , my bloud is drinke indeed . This Christ commeth to be by his incarnation . God in himselfe is as a bottomlesse and a closed fountaine : from him immediately we can receiue nothing . But Christ made flesh is e a fountaine opened : f In him all fulnesse dwelleth . g And of him haue all we receiued , euen grace for grace . Behold here the benefit of Christs incarnation : by his taking part of our mortall flesh , are we made partakers of his spirituall flesh , namely , of that spirituall life and grace which commeth from him , who was made flesh , to conuey the same into vs. To strengthen our faith the more firmly herein , the Lord hath instituted the holy Communion of his bodie and bloud . With what conscience , reuerence , and confidence , ought this blessed Sacrament to be celebrated ? By this Doctrine we may further learne how to seeke euery thing at Gods hands which we desire to obtaine , and how to offer that sacrifice of praise vnto God , which wee would haue to be accepted ; namely in and through Iesus Christ , by whom only we haue all that communion which we haue with God. Well therefore doth the Church conclude all her formes of Prayers and Praises with this , or such a like clause , through Iesus Christ our Lord. §. 78. Of the excellency of Regeneration . The particular matter of our regeneration ( the flesh and bones of Christ ) here expressed , sheweth that Regeneration is a most excellent worke . The excellencie hereof will the better appeare , if we compare it with the great and glorious worke of our creation , and shew how farre it surpasseth it : wherein I will hold close to this metaphor , and touch no other differences then it doth point out vnto vs. 1. In our creation Christ was only a worker : but he is the verie matter of our Regeneration , we are of his flesh . 2. The relation that then was betwixt Christ and man , was Creator , but here Head , We are members of his bodie . Creature ,   Bodie ,     The bond is now much neerer . 3. The being which then we had , was from Adam : But the being which now we haue is from Christ , of HIS flesh . 4. That being was but naturall . This is spirituall : for that which is borne of the Spirit , is Spirit . 5. Then our being was different from Christs : but now it is the verie same with Christs , Of his flesh . 6. Then might man cleane fall from that estate wherein he was created ( as he did ) and yet Christ remaine as he was . Now it cannot be so . For if any of the Saints now fall away , either Christ must fall with them , or they must be pulled from Christ , and so Christ remaine a maimed bodie . Behold the riches of Gods mercie . One might thinke it sufficient , and more then man could euer haue beene thankfull enough for , that God at first created man after his owne image in a most happie estate . From which when we wittingly and wilfully fell , God might iustly haue left vs , as he did the euill Angels . But he hath not only restored vs againe to that former estate , but aduanced vs to a farre more excellent and glorious estate : wherein his goodnesse appeareth to be as his greatnesse , infinite , incomprehensible . Who can sufficiently set it forth ? For as the heauen is high aboue the earth , so great is his mercie toward them that feare him . §. 79. Of the ancient Law of mariage . EPHES. 5. 31. For this cause shall a man leaue his father and mother , and shall be ioyned vnto his wife : and they two shall be one flesh . THe same points which were before laid downe , concerning the neere vnion of man and wife , and of Christ and the Church , are here further confirmed by the ancient law of mariage : which the Apostle doth the rather mention , because it followeth vpon that text , whereunto he alluded in the former verse . For when Moses had alledged these words of Adam concerning Eue , This is bone of my bones , and flesh of my flesh , he addeth this law , Therefore shall a man leaue his father , &c. In this place these words haue both a literall and a mysticall sense . A literall of man and wife . A mysticall of Christ and the Church . The maine thing which the Apostle aimeth at , is to shew how neerely man and wife are linked together : that thereby they may the rathet be moued to performe those mutuall and seuerall duties which they owe each to other . But because he propounded to husbands and wiues the examples of Christ and the Church , as patternes and motiues to them , to doe their dutie , he applieth that which was first spoken of man and wife , vnto Christ and his Church , to shew that there being so fit a resemblance betwixt these two couples , the patterne propounded is the more pertinent to the purpose , and the reason enforced from thence the more forcible . Because the opening of the literall sense will giue great light to the mysterie , I will first handle this text according to the meaning of the letter . The first clause ( for this cause ) implieth a necessarie connexion with that which went before . The neere vnion of man and wife , as well as of Christ and his Church , was before noted . A wife was said to be as the b bodie of a man , yea as b himselfe . Adam called her his flesh and bones . Hereupon both Moses and Paul inferre , Therefore , or , For this cause shall a man leaue father . Because man and wife are so neere by Gods institution , they must also be most deare each to other in their mutuall affection . The Man ( meaning an husband ) is here in particular mentioned , because at the first making of this Law the woman was brought to him to see how he would like her : and hauing cast his affection on her , he was to be bound hereby to continue that good liking towards her : as also because of the preheminencie which man hath aboue his wife . Yet is not the man only tied hereby , but the wife also : the nature and rule of relation requireth as much : if a man must inseparably cleaue to his wife , the wife must answerably cleaue to her husband . These words ( shall leaue father and mother ) are neither generally to be taken of all duties , as if no dutie were to be performed to parents by children after they are maried : nor simply , as if indeed parents were vtterly to be forsaken : but they are meant , 1. Of that daily seruice which children vnder their parents gouernment performe vnto them , seeking to please them in all things . When children are maried , then their daily attendance must be vpon their wiues , or husbands , taking care how to please them . 2. Of erecting a new family : for which end their parents house must be left , and the husband and wife must dwell each with other . 3. Of the difference to be put betwixt parents , and wife or husband . So as if by any ineuitable occasion it should so fall out , that a man must leaue his parent , or his wife ( as in case parent and wife were both giuing vp the Ghost , and in places so farre remote , as the husband could not possibly be with both , yet both instantly desired his companie ) by this Law he must leaue his parent , and cleaue to his wife . Hereby then the bond of mariage is declared to be the most inuiolable bond that can be . For all men know , that the bond betwixt parent and childe is a firme and inuiolable bond : but the bond betwixt husband and wife is more firme and inuiolable . To set forth the firmnesse of the mariage bond he addeth this Emphacicall phrase , shall be ioyned , ( or as the word properly , cording to the naturall notation thereof signifieth , shall be glued ) to his wife . Things well glued together are as fast , firme , and close as if they were one intire peece . Yea we obserue by experience that a table will oft times cleaue in the whole wood , before it will part asunder where it is glued : so as an husband ought to be as firme to his wife as to himselfe : and she to him . Fitly doth this agree with that which followeth ( they two shall be one flesh ) Our English cannot well expresse the Greeke in good sense word for word ( which is thus , they two shall beinto , or in one flesh ) the meaning is , They which were two before mariage , by the bond of mariage are brought into one flesh , to be euen as one flesh : as neerely vnited , as the parts of the same body , and the same flesh . This vnitie is not in regard of carnall copulation ( for if they be maried they are one flesh , though they neuer know one another ) nor in regard of procreation , because one childe commeth from them both ( for though they neuer haue childe , yet are they one flesh ) but in regard of Gods institution , who hath set it downe for a law , and as another nature , that man and wife should be so neere one to another . Their consent in mariage ( by vertue of Gods institution ) maketh them to be one flesh . Well doth our English note the emphasis of the originall in this particle THEY ( they two ) which sheweth that the bond of mariage knitteth only two together : one man , and one woman , and no more . This Law setteth forth the Vnion betwixt man and wife . Therein three things are noted concerning the state of mariage . 1. The praeeminencie of it ( a man shall leaue father and mother . ) 2. The firmnesse of it ( and be ioyned to his wife . ) 3. The neerenesse of it ( they two shall be one flesh . ) §. 80. Of preferring husband or wife before parents . The first point sheweth , that A wife , or an husband must be preferred before parents . The examples of b Leah and Rachel , yea and of c Micol , are commendable in this respect . 1. The bond of mariage is more ancient , more firme , more neere . There was husband and wife before there was parent and child : and there is a time when parents & children may depart one from another , and that while both liue : but no time , wherein man and wife may part asunder till death part them . And children though they come from the flesh of their parents , yet are made two ( so as of one are two ) but husbands and wiues though they were two before , yet are made one ( so as of two is one . ) What wrong then doe such parents vnto their children , as keepe them , euen after they are maried , so strait vnder subiection , as they cannot freely performe such duty as they ought to their husband , or their wife ? This is more then a parents authority reacheth vnto . Yet many thinke that their children owe as much seruice to them after they are maried as before : which is directly against this law . Greater is the wrong , and more sinfull is the practise of such as keepe their children from their husbands , or from their wiues . The match ( say they ) falleth out much worse then we looked for . But this should haue beene looked to more carefully before hand . After mariage it is too late to seeke such a redresse . On the other side , there be many children who so respect their parents , as they neglect their husband or their wife . Some husbands will bestow what they can on their parents , and keepe their wiues very bare , suffering them to want necessaries ; not caring how they vex and grieue them so they please their parents . Some wiues also will priuily purloine from their husbands to bestow on their parents . Others can neuer tarrie out of their parents houses , but as oft as they can , goe thither . The ancient Romans , to shew how vnmeet this was , had a custome to couer the brides face with a yellow veile , and so soone as she was out of her fathers house to turne her about and about , and so to carrie her to the house of her husband , that she might not know the way to her fathers house againe . All those pretenses of loue to parents are more preposterous then pious : and naturall affection beareth more sway in such , then true religion . Their pretence of piety to parents is no rust excuse for that iniury they doe to husband and wife . §. 81. Of the firmnesse of the matrimoniall bond . The second point concerning the firmnesse of the mariage knot in these words ( shall be ioyned to his wife ) affor deth two doctrines . 1. Man and wife must associate themselues together by continuall cohabitation : for this end they leaue their parents family , and erect a new family . 2. Man and wife are ioyned together by an inuiolable bond . It must neuer be cut asunder till death cut it . Body and soule must be seuered one from another before husband and wife . Be carefull therefore to preserue this indissoluble knot : and so liue together , as with comfort you may liue together , because you may not part . §. 82. Of two only to be ioyned together in mariage . The third point concerning the neerenesse of man and wife , in these words ( they two shall be one flesh ) affordeth two other doctrines . 1. Mariage can be but betwixt two , one man , and one woman : for it is impossible that more then two should so neerely , and firmely be ioyned together , as man and wife are . Euery word almost in this law proueth this doctrine . For it saith a man , not men : to a wife , not to wiues : to his wife , not to anothers wife : two , not more then two : they two , not any two : one flesh , not many fleshes . Obiect . This particle ( two ) is not in the law as Moses recordeth it . Answ . It is there necessarily implied , for at that time there were but two in the world : God then speaking of them , meaneth but two . The same spirit that guided Moses , guided also the b Euangelists , and the c Apostles : so as by their inserting of this particle ( two ) it is certaine that it was intended by Moses : as the particle ( only ) which Christ putteth into this text , d him only shalt thou serue . Quest . Why did God at first make but one man , and one woman ? Answ . The e Prophet answereth , that he might seeke a godly seed . If therefore there be more then two , it is an adulterous seed which proceedeth from thence . §. 83. Of Polygamy and Bigamy . Can Polygamy ( the hauing of many wiues ) or Bigamy ( the hauing of two wiues at once ) haue any good warrant against such an expresse law ? Are not both of them against the first institution of mariage , so as we may say , g from the beginning it was not so ? Yea also and against h other particular lawes ? i Lamech one of Cains cursed stocke was the first that we read of to haue presumed against that ancient law . Obiect . Afterwards many Patriarkes , and other Saints tooke that liberty vnto themselues . Answ . It was their sinne , and a great blemish in them . The common error of the time , & their vnsatiable desire of increase made them fall into it . Many inconueniences followed thereupon : neither can it be thought but that much mischiefe must needes follow vpon hauing more wiues then one : for whereas God at first made a wife to be as an helpe vnto man , two , or more wiues cannot but be a great griefe and vexation vnto him by reason of that emulation that is betwixt them . Through Hagars meanes was Sarah stirred against Abraham , and Abraham grieued at Sarahs words . Though Leah and Rachel were sisters , yet great were their emulations : the like whereof is noted of Peninnah and many others . Considering the hainousnesse of this sinne , our lawes haue iustly made it felony for a man to haue more wiues then one , or a woman more husbands . §. 84. Of the neere coniunction of man and wife together . 2. The neerest of all other are husband and wife one to another . Euery clause in the forenamed law proueth as much . 1. Parents must be left for wife : who neerer then parent and childe ? if man and wife be neerer then the neerest , then they are the neerest of all . 2. A man is glued to his wife . This metaphor setteth forth the neernesse of a thing as well as the firmnesse of it : for things glued together are as one intire thing . 3. Man and wife are one flesh : many of one are made two , but no two so neerely and truly made one as man and wife . As God hath limited a propinquity , and vnity of things , so are they to be accounted : but God hath thus neerely knit man and wife together , and made them one flesh . Those whom GOD hath ioyned together , saith Christ of man and wife : in which respect matrimoniall coniunction is called the couenant of God : so as this couenant cannot be released by any , no not by the mutuall consent of man and wife ( Those whom GOD hath ioyned together , let no man put asunder ) yet may many other couenants made betwixt partie and partie , be released and disanulled by mutuall consent of both parties . 1. This sheweth that the transgressions of man and wife one against another are of all the most hainous , more then of friend , fellow , brother , childe , parent or any other . Who would not cry fie vpon that child that hates his parent , or fie vpon that parent that hates his childe ? The heathen & sauages would not thinke them worthy of humane society . What then may be thought of the man that hateth his wife , or the wife that hateth her husband ? Apply this to all other transgressions : and well note how the Lord is a witnesse thereof . 2. This also sheweth how monstrous a thing it is to sow any seeds of discord , and stirre debate betwixt man and wife . The deuils instruments they are therein , and a diabolicall spirit is in them . For Satan most laboureth to vnloose those knots which the Lord knitteth most firmly . Children of seuerall venters , and seuerall friends of each partie , are much faultie herein . Cursed be they all before the Lord. 3. This neere coniunction betwixt man and wife is a great motiue to stirre them both vp , cheerefully to performe all the duties which God requireth of either of them . For thereby they doe dutie , and shew kindnesse to their owne flesh . No man may hide himselfe from his owne flesh at large : that is , no man may neglect any dutie of mercie , or iustice to his neighbour who is of the same stocke that he is : shall then an husband or wife hide themselues from one another who in the neerest respect that possibly can be are one flesh ? not because they come from one flesh , but because they come * into one flesh . Hitherto of the literall sense of this verse . The mysticall followeth . §. 85. Of the matrimoniall coniunction of Christ and the Church . The forenamed ancient mariage law is here applied mystically to Christ and the Church , as is euident by the next verse , where the Apostle hauing reference to this verse saith , This is a great mysterie . There is then a mysterie contained in it . But of what , or of whom is that mysterie ? The Apostle himselfe maketh answer , in these words : I speake concerning Christ and the Church . The mysterie in generall is this , Christ and the Church are to one another as husband and wife . The particulars of this mysterie are these . The matrimoniall coniunction betwixt Christ & the Church is a most Preheminent coniunction . Firme     Neere     First of the generall . The many espousall , and matrimoniall titles , which in Scripture are giuen to Christ and the Church in mutuall relation of one to another , euidently shew that they are ioyned together by the honourable , inseparable and inuiolable bond of mariage : He is stiled a a Bridegroome , she a Bride : he c Welbeloued , she Loue : he an d Husband , she a Wife : he an e Head , she the Body : both f one flesh . 2. All things requisite to ioyne man and wife together , doe fitly concurre betwixt Christ and the Church . 1. They are persons fit to be ioyned . Though Christ be God , yet for g this end he became man : and though the Church were impure , yet for this end is she cleansed and sanctified . 2. They haue their parents consent : for God is the h common father of both . And God hath giuen i Christ to the Church , and the k Church to Christ . 3. They haue giuen their l mutuall consent each to other . 4. He m beareth an husband like affection to her , and she is willing to yeeld a wife-like subiection to him . 5. He hath n giuen her many fauours and gifts as pledges of his loue : and she in testimony of her faithfulnesse was vnder the Law circumcised , and is vnder the Gospell baptized : and doth binde her selfe with all the sacred bonds and couenants which God to that purpose hath sanctified . 6. He hath prepared o places of habitation for them both together , and p she earnestly desireth to be with him . Behold another euidence of Christs admirable loue to the Church , and of the neere vnion betwixt Christ and her . The former was that she was his body . This , that she is his wife : well might the Church say as Abigaile did , Behold , let thine handmaid be a seruant to wash the feet of the seruants of my Lord : and as the prodigall child , Make me as one of thine hired seruants : or as the Baptist , I am not worthy to stoope downe to vnloose thy shoe-latchets . What a fauour then is it to be made his spouse , his wife , his Queene . Great was the fauour which Ahash-verosh shewed to Esther , when he made her his wife : he was a great Monarch , reigning from India to Ethiopia ouer 127 prouinces : but Esther was a poore orphane and captiue : yet was not this fauour comparable to Christs : for there was no such disparity and inequality betwixt Ahash-verosh and Esther , as betwixt Christ and the Church : neither is Esthers aduancement to be compared with the Churches : and yet there was some cause in Esther to moue Ahash-verosh to doe what he did , for she was very beautifull , and louely , and worthy to be loued : but * in the Church when Christ first cast his loue on her , there was no such thing . No patterne of loue can be giuen any way comparable to this . Let the Church therefore , and all that professe themselues to be of the Church , take such notice hereof , as they may endeuour to carry themselues worthy of this honour and aduancement : not to wax proud and insolent thereupon , but to despise all vaine and worldly toies : to answer loue with loue , as the Church is set forth in Salomons song ; to be subiect to her husband , to reuerence and obey him , and to performe all duties appertaining to such a wife : seeking by all good meanes to maintaine the honour of her place . The Church is made a patterne of dutie to all wiues : if she should faile , greater inconuenience would follow from thence , then from Vashties disobedience . This is the rather to be regarded because it is not only a matter of instruction but of triall also , shewing both what they which are of the Church ought to doe , and also * what indeed they will doe . Wherefore no prophane person that lightly esteemeth the Lord Iesus , no Idolater that casteth his loue on other husbands , no swearer or blasphemer that dishonoreth the great Name of Iesus , none that any way are rebellious against him , none that hate , scorne , scoffe , or hurt any of his members , can haue any comfort in this aduancement of the Church , because they haue no part therein , nor right thereunto . But great is that comfort which the true Saints may receiue therein . For by vertue of this matrimoniall bond , 1. Christ is made a yoakefellow with his Church , and her companion . Vnder all the burdens which are laid vpon her , he putteth his shoulder to make it the more easie : yea , the great burdens of Gods wrath , the curse of the law , and sinne the cause thereof , hath he so taken on him , as he hath cleane freed his Church from them , because they would else haue crushed her downe to hell . 2. Christ is as her champion to answer all challenges sent vnto her , as her aduocate to plead and answer all the complaints that shall be made against her , as her suretie to discharge all her debts : the Church being couert-baron vnder Christ , he is as her selfe , all in all for her , and to her . 3. All his honours , goods , priuiledges are hers : she hath a right to them , and her part in them , she is a coheire with him ( Rom. 8. 17. ) a Queene because he a King ( Psal . 45. 9. ) and all glorious , as was noted , vers . 27. 4. He will assuredly performe all the offices of an husband , as to loue her , beare with her , prouide for her , with the like . Able he is to doe all , for he is omnipotent : willing also he must needs be , because willingly he hath taken vpon him this place : he hath made himselfe a patterne to other husbands : will he not then doe that himselfe which herequireth of others ? If euer any wife might receiue comfort in a match , the Church may receiue comfort in this match . The benefit of this match will yet more liuely appeare by a particular consideration of the three forenamed properties of this matrimoniall bond , the preheminencie , firmnesse , and neerenesse thereof . §. 86. Of Christs leauing his Father and mother for his spouse . I. The preheminencie of the matrimoniall bond betwixt Christ and the Church herein appeareth , that Christ left his Father and his mother for his spouse the Church . As Christ is God , God is his Father ; as man , the Virgin Marie was his mother . Now the leauing of his Father must be taken only by way of resemblance , in that he came from the place of his Fathers habitation , to the place where his Spouse was . The Scripture saith , that he was in the bosome of his Father : by him , as one brought vp with him , his daily delight , reioycing alway before him : yet descended he into the lowest parts of the earth where his spouse was . He came out from the Father , and came into the world . But truly and properly did he preferre his Spouse before his mother . For when he was instructing his Spouse , and his mother came to interrupt him , he said to his mother , who is my mother ? and to his Spouse , behold my mother . Of the same minde must the Church , and all that are of the Church be vnto Christ : she must forget her owne people , and fathers house . Seeing Christ hath gone before vs , and giuen vs so good an example , what an high point of ingratitude would it be for vs , to preferre father , mother , or any other before Christ our husband ? Note what he saith in this case , He that loueth father or mother more then me , is not worthie of me . And againe , If any come vnto me , and hate not his father and mother , he cannot be mine . To hate here , is to be so farre from preferring father & mother before Christ , as rather then not to loue Christ , to hate father and mother . Or , so intirely to loue Christ aboue all , as our loue of parents in comparison thereof to be an hatted . Thus Leui said vnto his father and mother , I haue not seene him : for they obserued the word , and kept the couenant of Christ . This then is our dutie , that we suffer not any naturall affection and dotage on our parents to swallow vp that loue we owe to Christ , as Pharaohs ill-fauourèd and leane-fleshed kine eat vp the seuen well-fauoured and fat kine . How much lesse should any loue of this world , of the profits , promotions , or pleasures of this world , draw away our hearts from Christ ; should we not rather say and doe as the Apostles did , Behold , we haue for saken all and followed Christ ? §. 87. Of the indissoluble vnion betwixt Christ and the Church . II. The firmnesse of that bond whereby Christ and the Church are said to be glued together , is greater and more inuiolable then that whereby man and wife are ioyned together : Death parteth man and wife : but death cannot make a diremption betwixt Christ and the Church : so as we may well from this metaphor inferre , that Christ and the Church are inseparably knit together . I will betroth thee vnto me for euer , saith Christ vnto the Church . The couenant which Christ maketh with his Church , is an euerlasting couenant . The mountaines shall depart , and the hils be remoued , before his kindnesse shall depart from the Church . The stedfastnesse and vnchangeablenesse of his will , is the only cause thereof . Whom he loueth , he loueth vnto the end . His gifts and calling are without repentance . He is not like the hard hearted Iewes , who vpon euerie sleight occasion would put away their wiues . The Lord hateth putting away . Though therefore the Church , through her weaknesse , doe depart from him , and play the harlot , yet returne againe to me , saith the Lord. Learne we by this patterne to cleaue close vnto the Lord , which is a dutie most due to Christ who cleaueth so close to vs , and therefore oft d expressed in the Scripture . Three vertues there are which are of speciall vse to this purpose , Faith , Hope , Loue. Faith is the hand whereby we lay fast hold on Christ , and as it were knit him to our selues , as he by his Spirit knitteth vs to himselfe . This maketh vs rest and repose our selues on him for all needfull things : and not to leaue him for any thing . Hope is the anchor , which holdeth vs fast against all the stormes of Satan , so as they can neuer driue vs out of our harbour , which is the Lord Iesus Christ . Loue is the glue and soader which maketh vs one with Christ : for it is the propertie of loue to vnite those that loue one another in one . Ionathans soule was knit with the soule of Dauid . For why ? Ionathan loued him as his owne soule . He that loueth is well pleased with him whom he loueth , and seeketh also to please him , that they may mutually delight one in another . Were these three vertues well rooted in vs , we would say , who shall separate vs from the loue of Christ ? shall tribulation , or distresse , &c. §. 88. Of the equall priuiledge of all the Saints . III. Concerning the phrase , whereby the neerenesse of man and wife is set forth ( they two shall be one flesh ) it may be demanded how this can be applied to Christ and the Saints , who are more then two ? Answ . Christ by one Spirit knitteth vs all into one bodie , and so maketh all ioyntly considered together one Spouse . The multitude of Saints doth no more imply many wiues , then the multitude of members which the naturall bodie of a wife hath . This point then teacheth vs , that In the mysticall mariage betwixt Christ and the Church , all and euerie of the Saints haue an equall priuiledge . Some are not Concubines , some wiues , nor some more loued , or preferred to another , but all one wife . All are one in Christ Iesus . Neither the Father that gaue them all , nor the Sonne who tooke them all , saw any thing in one more then in another ; their meere grace moued them to doe what they did . Well may euerie one apply all the forenamed priuiledges vnto themselues : and not one emulate another . This affordeth instruction to the more eminent in the Church , that like proud dames they insult not ouer others , as if they were their hand-maids : and consolation to the meaner sort , that they may vphold themselues , and possesse their soules with patience , and not enuie , or grieue at the outward prosperitie and priuiledges of others . In the greatest priuiledge they are equall to the greatest . This of the parties coupled to Christ . For these words ( they two ) shew that all the Saints are but one : Christ is the other of the two . The next words ( are one flesh ) shew how neere those Saints are to Christ . §. 89. Of the neere vnion betwixt Christ and the Church . The maine point here to be noted is , that Christ and the Church are most neerely linked together . What can be neerer , then that two should come into one flesh ? This is somewhat more then to be of Christs flesh . That shewes we are as it were cut out of Christ : this shewes that we are againe knit to him . That was a preparation vnto this : this is as the consummation and perfection of all . * Many metaphors are vsed to set forth the neere vnion betwixt Christ and his Church , but this surpasseth them all . As here we and Christ are said to be one flesh , so in another place , one spirit . Well therefore might the name and title Christ be giuen to this Spouse of Christ . * It was noted on a like ground to this , that of all other persons the transgression of a wife against an husband is most hainous . What then are the transgressions of the Church against Christ ? As we are much more bound vnto Christ for the priuiledges we receiue from him as an Head and Husband , and so our Sauiour hauing made with vs an euerlasting couenant of mariage , then for those we receiued from him as our Creator , Lord and Master : so are the rebellions now committed against him more monstrous . To Adam that broke the first couenant whereby like a rebellious childe and seruant he sinned against his Father and Master , mercy and pardon was giuen : but to such as now breake the bond of this euerlasting couenant , and make a totall and finall desertion , vtterly renouncing this Husband , or by their adulterie cause him to giue them a bill of diuorce , there remaineth no more sacrifice for sinnes ; but a certaine fearfull looking for of iudgement , and fierie indignation which shall deuoure the aduersaries . This is to be noted , to make vs the more circumspect ouer our waies , resisting sinne in the beginning , and looking diligently lest any man fall from the grace of God ; and giuing no place at all vnto the Deuill . Satan will most endeuour to dissolue the neerest bonds that God maketh . This then being the neerest of all , we ought to be the most carefull in preseruing it . §. 90. Of the mysterie of the vnion of Christ and the Church . EPHES. 5. 32. This is a great mysterie : but I speake concerning Christ and the Church . THis verse is a conclusion of that excellent digression which the Apostle hath made concerning the neere vnion of Christ and the Church . In it two points are to be noted . 1. A patheticall exclamation ( This is a great mysterie . ) 2. A particular application of the forenamed law ( but I speake concerning Christ and the Church . Here first note that The vnion betwixt Christ and the Church is a great mysterie . The Apostle could not haue said more of it then to call it a mysterie , a great mysterie . A mysterie is a diuine secret . A Secret it is in two respects . 1. Because it is not knowne . 2. Because it is vnsearchable : the depth of it cannot be fathomed . It is a Diuine secret , for two other respects . 1. Because it could not haue beene opened but by diuine reuelation . 2. Because when it is opened it cannot be conceiued but by the illumination of the Spirit . That Spirit which openeth and reuealeth the mysterie , must also open the eies of our vnderstanding to discerne aright of it . It is further said to be a great mysterie . 1. Simply in it selfe , because the matter thereof is deepe , difficult , waightie , and of great moment . 2. Comparatiuely in relation to other mysteries : no mysterie reuealed in Gods word comparable to it . Let vs not presume to measure it with the line of our owne reason . It being a great mysterie , it is aboue our capacitie : yet because it is reuealed we must beleeue it , as we doe the mysteries of the Trinitie , of Christs eternall generation , of the personall vnion of his two natures , of the proceeding of the holy Ghost , with the like ; because the word hath reuealed them , though we cannot fully see the reason of them . Herein lieth a maine difference betwixt our estate in this world and in the world to come : here we must beleeue what we know but in part : there we shall perfectly know whatsoeuer is to be beleeued . Preachers can but in part make knowne this mysterie , and hearers can but in part conceiue it , let vs therefore wait for perfect vnderstanding of it , till all things be perfected in Christ : but in the meane time beleeue without doubting or wauering , that which is reuealed of it . In our meditation of this mysterie , let vs conceiue no carnall , no earthly thing of it , because it is a mysterie : it is altogether spirituall and heauenly . From the naturall vnion of our head and bodie , and from the matrimoniall vnion of man and wife , we may and ought to take occasion by way of resemblance , to helpe our vnderstanding in the vnion of Christ and his Church : for this end are these resemblances vsed , and by this meanes may our vnderstanding be much helped , as by the outward elements and rites which are vsed in the Sacraments : but if because of these comparisons we draw this which is only and wholly spirituall , to any carnall matter , we shall make that to be a thicke mist , and darke cloud , which is giuen for a light . The dotage of our aduersaries is here plainly discouered . They make our vnion with Christ meerely carnall . For they conceit it to consist in a corporeall commixtion of Christs flesh with ours , by our eating his flesh with the teeth of our bodies , and drinking his bloud downe our throats , and digesting both in our stomacks as our bodily food , that so it may turne into our substance . Thus they shew themselues like the dull-headed Capernaitans , and like ignorant Nicodemus . There is a great deale of grosse absurditie , but no great mysterie in that conceit . §. 91. Of the Popes vsurping to be Spouse of the Church . The Apostles application of this mysterie to Christ and the Church , discouereth two grosse errours of the Papists . One , that they make the Pope a Spouse of the Church . With what face can any apply that to the Pope and the Church , which the Apostle so expresly saith is meant of Christ and the Church ? yea , what arrogant presumption is it , to attribute that to mortall sinfull man , which is proper to the eternall and holy Sonne of God ? Is not this to conferre Christs prerogatiues vpon himselfe , and so make himselfe plaine Antichrist ? Who gaue the Church to the Pope , or the Pope to the Church ? When did she giue her consent ? ( I speake of the true Catholike Church of Christ . ) What hath he done for her ? or rather what hath he not done against her ? The * distinction of Imperiall and Ministeriall Spouse , cannot here serue the turne . As the metaphor of an head , so much lesse the metaphor of a Spouse will admit a ministeriall Spouse . As he is an adulterer that taketh vpon him to be a ministeriall husband , so is she an adulteresse that yeeldeth her selfe to such an one . The Apostle saith , I haue espoused you to ONE husband . §. 92. Of the false Sacrament of Mariage . The other error is , that Mariage is a Sacrament : the maine ground whereof they haue taken from this text , which ground by the Apostles application of this mysterie to Christ and the Church , is as plainly remoued , as if the Apostle had purposely ordered his stile , to preuent this erroneous collection : as if he had said , That none may mistake this mysterie , and apply it to a matrimoniall coniunction of man and woman together , know that I meane no such thing : the mysterie which I speake of , is concerning Christ and the Church . I maruell how they dare misapply that which is so plainly expressed . Though the Apostle had not so clearely shewed his minde and meaning , yet the verie thing it selfe would lead vs so to iudge of it . For , that which in Christ and the Church is a great mysterie , in man and wife is but a small matter . The vulgar Latine translation first led them into this error , for it translateth the word mysterie , a Sacrament . But a translation is no sufficient ground to proue a doctrine . Besides the word Sacrament vsed by that Translator , hath as large an extent as a mysterie : if they should make euerie thing which he translateth Sacrament , a proper Sacrament of the Church , there would be many more Sacraments then the Papists themselues doe make . 1. As for this supposed Sacrament , no Papist could euer shew when or where God ordained it to be a Sacrament . Nay , they agree not among themselues about the time , how long it hath beene a Sacrament . * Some of them hold , that euer since the first institution of mariage in Paradise , it hath beene a Sacrament . But the greater number of Papists hold it to be a Sacrament of the new Testament vnder the Gospell , because their Tridentine Councell hath so decreed it . Where we may note how the greater number of them , when two absurdities are questioned , are readie to fall into the worst . Vnder the Law the nonage of the Church needed , and had more Sacraments then vnder the Gospell : yet that which was in vse as much vnder the Law as vnder the Gospell , and had then as much to make it a Sacrament as now , was then none , yet now is one . 2. As they cannot shew where it was ordained for a Sacrament , so neither can they shew what is the Sacramentall signe thereof . Some make carnall copulation to be it . But there may be a true mariage , though the parties maried neuer know each other . Others make the Parents giuing to be the signe . But they hold that that is a true mariage , which is done without parents consent . Others the Priests blessing . Yet they hold the mariage of Infidels and Heretiques who haue no Priests , to be a true mariage . Others , the consent of the parties themselues . Thus shall a partie administer a Sacrament to himselfe . Others , other things . Thus they wanting the light of Gods word , one strayeth in one by-path , another in another , and none of them hit vpon the right . 3. A like difference there is about the forme of this Sacrament . 4. If other positions deliuered by them concerning matrimonie be noted , a man would thinke that they should be farre from making it a Sacrament . They preferre virginitie before it . Yea , they account it a kinde of pollution . They hold it vnlawfull for Priests , Monks , Nuns , and such like holy orders ( as they esteeme them ) to marie : so as there is a Sacrament , whereof their holy ones may not partake . The order of Priesthood is a Sacrament ( in their account ) yet that order keepeth from mariage , so as one Sacrament fighteth against another . Yea , Infidels may be partakers of a Sacrament , and so their holy and precious things shall be denied to their holy ones , and cast vnto swine . Thus we see a rotten building erected vpon a sandie foundation : a false Sacrament established vpon a false application of this text . Can it then stand ? §. 93. Of the Summe of husbands and wiues duties . EPHES. 5. 33. Neuerthelesse , let euerie one of you in particular so loue his wife , euen as himselfe : and the wife see that she reuerence her husband . THe Apostle hauing made a large digression about the mutuall relation betwixt Christ and the Church , whom he propounded as patternes to husbands and wiues , he now returneth to the maine point intended , namely to the duties of husbands and wiues : and so much doth the first particle imply ( Neuerthelesse ) as if he had thus said , Though I haue a little digressed into the mysterie of the vnion of Christ and the Church , yet neuerthelesse doe ye , ô husbands and wiues , call to minde that which I principally aimed at , euen your duties . This verse then containeth a conclusion of the Apostles discourse , concerning the duties of husbands and wiues . Two points are especially noted therein . 1. A declaration of their seuerall and distinct duties . 2. A direction to apply their owne proper duties each of them to themselues . Their distinct duties are noted in two words , Loue. Feare .   These two , as they are distinct duties in themselues , so are they also common conditions which must be annexed to all other duties . Loue as sugar to sweeten the duties of authoritie , which appertaine to an husband . Feare as salt to season all the duties of subiection which appertaine to a wife . The Apostle therefore hath set them downe as two marks for husbands and wiues to aime at in euerie thing wherein they haue to deale one with the other . Of these I will more distinctly speake in the treatises of the particular duties of husbands and wiues . §. 94. Of applying the word to our selues . The direction for a particular application of their owne proper duties to either of them is here especially to be noted . In this direction two things are to be obserued . 1. That euery particular person apply to himselfe that which by a Minister is indefinitly deliuered to all . Euery one of you in particular , saith the Apostle : which is as much as if he had thus more largely expressed his minde , I haue laid downe such generall duties as all husbands and wiues without exception of any of what ranke or degree soeuer they be are bound vnto ; which though by name I haue not seuerally deliuered to euerie one , one by one , but generally to you all , yet doe euerie one of you apply those things to your selues in particular . 2. That euery one apply his owne peculiar dutie vnto himselfe . Loue being peculiar to an husband , to him he saith , Let him loue his wife : and reuerence being peculiar to a wife , to her he saith , let the wife see that she reuerence her husband . The direction in euery of those seuerall Epistles which were sent to the seuen Churches of Asia , ( in these words , He that hath an eare , let him heare what the Spirit saith to the Churches ) doth teach euerie member in any of those Churches to apply to himselfe that which was deliuered to the whole Church : so doth a like x exhortation which Christ with an exclamation made to the people whom he taught in parables : and this declaration of the extent of Christs counsell , what I say to you , I say to all . To this purpose many precepts giuen to whole Churches , and to all sorts of people are set downe in the singular number as giuen to one , as , Awake THOV that sleepest . THOV standest by faith : be not thou high minded &c. The life and power of Gods word consisteth in this particular application thereof vnto our selues . This is to mixe faith with hearing : faith , I say , whereby we doe not only beleeue the truth of Gods word in generall , but also beleeue it to be a truth concerning our selues in particular : and thus will euery precept thereof be a good instruction and direction on to vs to guide vs in the way of righteousnesse : euery promise therein will be a great incouragement , and consolation to vs to vphold vs , and to make vs hold on : and euery iudgement threatned therein will be a curbe , and bridle to hold vs in , and to keepe vs from those sinnes against which the iudgements are threatned . But otherwise , if we bring not the word home to our own soules , it will be as a word spoken into the aire , vanishing away without any profit to vs. Nothing maketh the word lesse profitable , then the putting of it off from our selues to others , thinking that it concernes others more then our selues . That we may make the better vse of this doctrine , let vs obserue both what are generall duties belonging to all Christians , and apply them as particular to our selues : and also what duties appertaine to such persons as are of our place , calling , and condition , and more especially apply them to our selues : let all manner of husbands , and all manner of wiues of what ranke or degree soeuer they be that shall read the duties hereafter following , know that they are spoken to them in particular . Let Kings and Queenes , Lords and Ladies , Ministers and their wiues , Rich men and their wiues , Poore men and their wiues , Old men and their wiues , Young men and their wiues , all of all sorts take them as spoken to them in particular . It is not honour , wealth , learning , or any other excellency , nor meanes of place , pouerty , want of learning , or any other like thing that can exempt an husband from louing his wife , or a wife from reuerencing her husband . He that saith euery one , excepteth not any one . Therefore euery one in particular doe yee so . The like application may be made to all Parents and children , Masters and seruants , concerning their duties . §. 95. Of euery ones looking to his owne dutie especially . In the forenamed application an eye must be had rather to the dutie which we owe , and ought to be performed by vs to others , then to that which is due to vs , and others ought to performe to vs : for the Apostle saith not to the husband , see that thy wife reuerence thee , but see that thou loue her : so to the wife . For this purpose the holy Ghost presseth particular duties vpon those particular persons who ought to performe them : as Subiection on wiues : loue on husbands : and so in others . This therefore is especially to be considered of thee , how thou maist shew thy selfe blamelesse . I denie not but that one ought to prouoke another , and one to helpe another in what they can to performe their dutie , especially superiours who haue charge ouer others , but the most principall care of euery one ought to be for himselfe , and greatest conscience to be made of performing his owne duty . 1. It is more acceptable before God , and more commendable before men to doe duty , then to exact duty . As in matters of free charity , so also of bounden duty , It is more blessed to giue , then to receiue . In particular it is better for an husband to be a good husband , then to haue a good wife : so for a wife . To haue others faile in duty to vs may be an heauy crosse , for vs to faile in our dutie to others is a fearefull curse . 2. Euery one is to giue an account of his owne particular duty . That which the Prophet speaketh of father and sonne , may be applied to husband and wife , and to all other sorts of people , If a father doe that which is lawfull and right , he is iust , he shall surely liue : if he beget a sonne that doth not so , he shall surely die , his bloud shall be vpon him . Againe , if a father doe that which is not good , he shall die in his iniquity : but if his sonne doe that which is lawfull and right he shall surely liue . The righteousnesse of the righteous shall be vpon himselfe : and the wickednesse of the wicked shall be vpon himselfe . That this shall be so betwixt husband and wife , may be gathered out of these words , Two shall be in one bed , the one shall be taken , the other left . Let this be noted against the common vaine apologies which are made for neglect of duty , which is this , Dutie is not performed to me , why shall I doe dutie ? when my husband doth his dutie , I will doe mine , saith the wife . And I mine , saith the husband , when my wife doth hers . What if he neuer doe his dutie , and so be damned , wilt thou neuer doe thine ? This looking for of dutie at others hands , makes vs the more carelesse of our owne . Doe you therefore O husbands looke especially to your owne duties , doe you loue your wiues : and you ô wiues looke you to yours especially , doe you reuerence your husbands . For this end , let husbands read those duties most diligently which concerne husbands , and wiues those , which concerne wiues . Let not the husband say of the wiues duties , there are goodlessons for my wife , and neglect his owne : nor the wife say the like of husbands duties , and not regard her owne . This is it that maketh the subiection of many wiues very harsh and irkesome to them , because their husbands that vrge and presse them thereto shew little , or no loue to them at all : and this is it that maketh many husbands very backwards in shewing loue , because their wiues which expect much loue , shew little or no reuerence to their husbands . Wherefore Let euery one of you in particular so loue his wife , euen as himselfe : and the wife see that she reuerence her husband . §. 96. Of the meaning of the first verse of the sixt Chapter . FRom those particular duties which concerne husbands and wiues the Apostle proceedeth to lay down such as concerne children and parents . As before he laid downe wiues duties before husbands , so here he beginneth with childrens ( who are inferiour to their parents ) and that for the same reasons which were rendred * before . Besides children are the fruits of matrimoniall coniunction , therefore fitly placed next vnto Man and Wife . That which concerneth children is laid downe in the sixt Chapter of Eph. vers . 1 , 2 , 3. The meaning whereof we will distinctly open . EPHES. 6. 1. Children obey your parents in the Lord : for this is right . The first word ( children ) is in the originall as proper a word at could be vsed , for according to the notation of it , it signifieth such as are begotten and borne . Answerable is the other word ( parents ) which signifieth such as beget and bring forth children . Yet are they not so strictly to be taken as if none but such as begat and brought forth , or such as are begotten and brought forth of them were meant : for vnder the title parents , he includeth all such as are in the place of naturall parents , as Grandfathers and Grandmothers , Fathers in law , and Mothers in law , Foster-fathers and Foster-mothers , Guardians , Tutors , and such like gouernors : and vnder the title children he compriseth Grand-children , Sonnes and daughters in law , Wards , Pupils , and such like . For there is an honour and a subiection due by all who are in place of children , to all such as are in place of parents , though in a different kinde , as we shall * after shew . This word children which in the originall is of the neuter gender , doth further include both sexes , males and females , sonnes and daughters : so as either of them are as carefully to apply the duties here set forth to themselues as if in particular both kindes had beene expressed . He expresseth parents in the plurall number , to shew that he meaneth here also both sexes father and mother , as the law expresseth both : and addeth this relatiue particle your , as by way of restraint , to shew that euery child is not bound to euery parent , so by way of extent to shew that whatsoeuer the estate of parents be honourable or meane , rich or poore , learned or vnlearned , &c. their owne children must not be ashamed of them , but yeeld all bounden dutie to them : if they be parents to children , they must be honoured by children . The word ( Obey ) vnder which all duties of children are comprised , according to the Greeke notation , signifieth with an humble submission to hearken , that is , to attend and giue heed to the commandements , reproofes , directions , and exhortations which are giuen to them , and that with such a reuerend respect of the parties who deliuer them , as they make themselues conformable thereto . A dutie proper to inferiours , and implieth both reuerence and obedience : the * verbe noteth out Obedience ; the * preposition , Reuerence . Vnder this word ( Obey ) the Apostle comprehendeth all those duties which thorowout the Scripture are required of children : as is manifest by his owne exemplification thereof in the second verse by the word honour which the law vseth : so as this word ( obey ) is to be taken in as large an extent as that word ( honour . ) Quest . Why is obedience put for all the rest ? Answ . 1. Because it is the hardest of all the rest , and that which children are loathest to performe they who willingly yeeld to this , will sticke at no duty . 2. Because it is the surest euidence of that honour which a childe oweth to his parent : and so of performing the fift commandement . 3. Because children are bound to their parents : the duties which they performe are not of curtesie , but necessity . Their parents haue power to command , and exact them . The clause added ( in the Lord ) is in effect the same which was vsed * before ( as vnto the Lord ) and it noteth forth a limitation , direction , and instigation : a limitation shewing that childrens obedience to their parents is to be restrained to the obedience which they owe to Christ , and may not goe beyond the limits thereof : a direction shewing that in obeying their parents , they must haue an eye to Christ , and so obey them as Christ may approue thereof : an instigation shewing that parents beare the image of Christ , and in that respect children must the rather obey their parents . The last clause of this verse ( for this is right ) is an expresse reason to inforce the forenamed point of obedience : and it is drawne from equity : and sheweth that it is a point agreeable to all law : yea that in way of recompence it is due : and if children be not obedient to parents they doe that which is most vniust , they defraud their parents of their right . The former phrase ( in the Lord ) implying one reason , this plainly noteth out another , as the first particle ( for ) declareth . §. 97. Of the meaning of the second verse . EPHES. 6. 2. Honour thy father and mother ( which is the first commandement with promise . ) THe very words of the fift commandement are here alleaged by the Apostle as a confirmation of the forenamed reason , that , it is iust and right to obey parents , because God in the morall law enioyneth as much . The law is more generall then the Apostles precept : for the law compriseth vnder it all those duties which all kinde of inferiours owe to their superiours , whether they be in family , church , or common wealth : but the Apostles precept is giuen only to one kinde of inferiours in the family : yet the argument is very sound and good from a generall to a particular , thus , All inferiours must honour their superiours , therefore children their parents . By adding the expresse words of the law the Apostle sheweth that the subiection which he required of children is no yoke which he of his owne head put on their neckes : but that which the morall law hath put on them : so as this may be noted as a third reason , namely Gods expresse charge in his morall law . If I should handle this law according to the full extent thereof , I should wander too farre from the Apostles scope . I will therefore open it no further then it may concerne the point in hand , viz. the duty of children . Honour compriseth here all those duties which children in any respect owe to their parents . It implieth both an inward reuerend estimation , and also an outward dutifull submission . Yea it implieth also recompence , and maintenance . Honour in relation to parents , is vsed for two reasons especially . 1. To shew that parents beare Gods image : for honour is properly due to God alone : to the creature it is due , only as it standeth in Gods roome , and carieth his image . 2. To shew , that it is an honour to parents to haue dutifull children : euen as it is a dishonour to them to haue disobedient children . Both father and mother are expresly mentioned , to take away all pretence from children of neglecting either of them : for through the corruption of nature we are prone to seeke after many shifts to exempt vs from our bounden dutie ; and if not in whole , yet in as great a part as we can . Some might thinke if they honour their father , who is their mothers head , they haue done what the law requireth : others may thinke they haue done as much , if they honour their mother who is the weaker vessell : but the law expressing father and mother , condemneth him that neglecteth either of them . Yet to shew that if opposition should arise betwixt them , and by reason thereof both could not be obeyed together , the father commanding what the mother forbiddeth , the father is to be preferred , ( especially if it be not against the Lord ) the father is set in the first place . These words following ( which is the first commandement with promise ) are fitly included in a parenthesis , because they are not the words of the law , but inserted by the Apostle as a reason to inforce the law , and so make a fourth reason . Quest . In what respect is this commandement called the first with promise ? Answ . 1. The * word here vsed by the Apostle properly signifieth an affirmatiue precept , as our English word ( commandement ) doth . Now then of the affirmatiue precepts it is the first with promise . 2. The Scripture oft appropriateth the law to the second table , as where he saith he that loueth another hath fulfilled the law , and so in other places . Now this is the first commandement of the second table . 3. It is generally true of all the commandements : for among the ten it is the first with promise . Obiect . The second commandement hath a promise annexed to it . Answ . 1. That which is annexed to the second Commandement , is not expresly a promise , but rather a declaration of Gods Iustice , in taking vengeance of transgressors , and of his mercie in rewarding obseruers of the Law : yet I denie not but that a promise by consequence is implied : but here it is expressed . 2. The promise there implied is only a generall promise made to obseruers of the whole Law , and therefore he vseth the plurall number , Commandements : but here is a particular promise made to them that keepe this Commandement in particular . 2. Quest . Why is it then said the first , when no other Commandements with promise follow ? Answ . This particle ( first ) hath not alwayes reference to some other following , but is oft simply taken , to shew that none was before it : so is the word first-borne vsed in the Law : and so Christ is called the first-borne Sonne of Marie . The word promise sheweth , that this fourth reason includeth some benefit redounding to those children themselues that honour their parents : the benefit is expresly mentioned in the next verse , which we will afterwards distinctly consider . §. 98. Of aiming at our owne , in seeking the good of others . Here in generall we may note , that It is not vnlawfull to aime at our owne good and benefit in doing the duties which God requireth at our hands to others : for that which God himselfe propoundeth and setteth before vs , we may seeke and aime at . Many like promises there be in Scripture , and many approued prayers grounded on those promises whereby the truth of the doctrine is confirmed vnto vs. Hezekiah maketh the good seruice he had done to God and his Church , a ground to obtaine longer life : so others . For God layeth no dutie on any man , but therein he aimeth at the good of him who performeth the dutie as well as of him to whom the dutie is performed . Whereby he would shew that his Commandements are no strait yokes and heauie burthens , but meanes of procuring their good who fulfill them . How highly doth this commend the good respect that God beareth to all the sonnes of men : seeking their good in euerie place wherein he setteth them , either of authoritie , or subiection ? How ought this to stirre vs vp willingly and cheerefully to obserue the Lawes which God commandeth vs , and performe the seruices he requireth of vs , seeing thereby we procure our owne good ? How fully may this satisfie , and euen stop the mouthes of all such as are discontent with their places , and mutter against that subiection which God enioyneth to them ? What a good direction and resolution may this be to many , who being moued in conscience to seeke the good of others , doubt whether therein they may aime at their owne good or no ? To make this case cleare by an instance , which may serue in stead of many . A Minister faithfull in his place , and verie painfull , and in that respect of a good conscience , but withall of a tender and weake conscience , doubteth whether thereby he may seeke maintenance to himselfe , fearing that so he seeketh himselfe , and not simply the edification of Gods Church . But by the forenamed doctrine we see that both may be aimed at : for God commandeth the one , and promiseth the other . As we haue one eye on Gods Commandement for direction , so we may haue another on his promise for incouragement . Yet because through the corruption of our nature , we are too prone to seeke our selues , some cautions are in this point carefully to be obserued . 1. That we seeke not our owne good by any transgression , for it is promised vnto obedience . 2. That we doe not so wholly seeke our selues and our owne good , as we neglect others : for God hauing ioyned both together , no man may put them asunder . 3. That we aime at our owne good , as a reward following vpon the dutie which God commandeth , and so be as willing to doe the dutie , as desirous of the reward . 4. That our owne benefit be not the only , no nor the chiefest thing we aime at in doing our dutie , but rather come as a motiue to adde an edge , and to sharpen other motiues of greater moment . And thus much the order which the Apostle obserueth in setting downe his reasons , noteth vnto vs : for the three former haue respect to God , and to that good conscience which children ought to carrie towards him : the first pointeth at Gods image which parents carie ( in the Lord : ) the second setteth forth that right which God hath prescribed to children : the third declareth Gods charge : this fourth only , which is the last , hath respect to the profit and benefit of children themselues . §. 99. Of preferring honestie before commoditie . From the forenamed order we may further gather , that Equitie and good conscience ought more to moue vs to doe our dutie then our owne profit , and the benefit that thereby redoundeth to vs. If there should come such an opposition betwixt these that they could not both stand togethet , but that for doing that which is right , and which God hath commanded , our prosperitie must be hindred and life shortned , we should so stand to that which is right and commanded of God , as prosperitie , life and all be let goe . To this purpose tend all the exhortations in Scripture , to forsake goods , lands , life , and euerie thing else for righteousnesse sake . So cleare is this point , that the Heathen discerned it by the glimpse of that light of nature which they had : for they could say , that that which is honest and right , is to be preferred before that which is commodious and profitable . There is no comparison betwixt honestie and commoditie , right and profit . The one is absolutely necessarie for attaining to eternall saluation , the other giueth but a little quiet and contentment in this world : nay , if profit be without right , it can giue no true contentment or quiet at all . Vnworthie therefore they are of the name of Christians , who so wholly and only aime at their outward profit and prosperitie , as they regard not what is right , and what God hath commanded . If by obeying God , and doing that which is right they may reape some benefit to themselues they can be content to yeeld thereunto : but if not , farewell all right , farewell all Gods commandements . Though they thinke euery thing that is profitable , be it right or wrong , to be good , yet Gods word accounteth nothing good but that which is honest : such therefore can looke for no blessing from the Lord. §. 100. Of the meaning of the third verse . EPHES. 6. 3. That it may be well with thee , and thou maist liue long on the earth . THe promise mentioned before in generall , is here particularly set downe . The first words ( that it may be well with thee ) are not in the Hebrew text b there where the Law is first recorded , and thereupon not set in that vsuall forme of the ten Commandements , which is in vse among vs : but yet in c another place where the Law is repeated , they are set downe : and the Greeke translation , commonly called the Septuagint ( which ( as is probable ) the Church in the Apostles time vsed ) hath expresly noted it in both places . Now this part of the promise ( that it may be well with thee ) is prefixed as an amplification of the other part concerning long life , which is the most principall thing intended , as appeareth in that it only is mentioned where the Law is first recorded . It sheweth that the long life which God promiseth , shall not be a life of woe and miserie , ( for then were it no blessing , but the longer life lasted , the worse it would be ) but a life full of comfort and happinesse : therefore Moses fetteth this former clause in the latter place after long life thus ( that thy dayes may be prolonged , and that it may goe well with thee ) to shew that the well being here spoken of , is an amplification of the benefit of long life . Whereas the Apostle setteth downe the place where the benefit of this promise is to be enioyed in a most large phrase , thus ( on earth ) the Law bringeth it to a more narrow compasse thus ( in the land which the Lord thy God giueth thee ) meaning the land of Canaan which was giuen of God as a peculiar inheritance to the Iewes : so that the promise ( as the Law setteth it downe in peculiar to the Iewes ) implieth long life , and prosperitie in their owne inheritance : for long life to the Iewes was counted no life out of their owne Countrey . But the Apostle writing to all nations , leaueth out that description of Canaan , and retaineth only the generall substance in this word ( on earth ) which he setteth downe to shew that euen outward prosperitie , and a long life in this world is here promised . §. 101. Of prosperitie : how farre forth it may be a blessing . For further clearing of this text , and for better application thereof , I will resolue sundrie questions arising out of it , and gather such profitable instructions as it affordeth . The promise consisteth of two branches . The first branch ( that it may be well with thee ) is very ample and large : all good things , all manner of blessings whatsoeuer , spirituall and temporall , belonging to soule and body , concerning this life , and the life to come , make to a mans well-being . Whence may first be demanded ; 1. Qust . What may be the extent of this phrase in this place ? Answ . It may generally be extended to all manner of good things . For Godlinesse hath promise of the life that now is and of that that is to come . But ( as I take it ) temporall prosperitie is here principally intended : and that for these reasons . 1. It is ioyned with long life , which is a temporall blessing . 2. The last word ( on earth ) may be referred to this branch of well-being , as well as to the other of long life . 3. In the Law ( from whence this clause is taken ) it is expresly set downe , thus , that it may goe well with thee in the land , &c. 2. Quest . Is then outward temporall prosperitie ( as honour , health , peace , libertie , goods , &c. ) a token of Gods loue and fauour ? Answ . Yea : in it selfe it is a blessing , and fruit of Gods loue : as appeareth by these reasons . 1. As at first it was made and ordained of God , it is a good thing . 2. It tendeth to mans good , if it be rightly vsed . 3. It was bestowed on man before he had offended . 4. It is promised of God as a reward to them that feare him and keepe his Commandements . 5. The Saints haue prayed for it , and haue beene thankfull for it . 6. The contrarie was first inflicted as a punishment of sinne , and is oft threatned as a token of Gods wrath , and so hath also beene inflicted on transgressors . §. 102. Of prosperitie bestowed on the wicked , how it proues a curse . 3. Quest . Why then is it bestowed vpon the wicked , euen such as are * haters of God , and are hated of him ? And why are Gods friends , such as are * loued of him , and loue him againe , depriued thereof ? This sore scruple made Dauid stumble , and moued other Prophets to complaine . But the answer is readie . Answ . Outward prosperitie is of that nature , as it may turne to the good or hurt of him that enioyeth it . And herein is Gods admirable and vnsearchable wisdome seene , in that he is able to turne blessings into curses , and curses into blessings . He can worke by contraries . 4. Quest . How is prosperitie a curse to the wicked ? Answ . By meere consequence , through their abuse of it . God giues it to them to shew the riches of his mercie : and that all may taste thereof , he doth good to the euill and the good . Besides , he thus trieth if by any meanes they may be brought to repentance : which gift because they haue not , their prosperitie proueth to be a meanes to make them the more inexcusable , and the more to increase their iust condemnation . For the more Gods blessings abound towards them , the more they abuse them , adding to all their other sinnes , that most odious sinne of ingratitude , which maketh vp the heape of all . And in these respects I may say of the prosperitie of the wicked , as the Prophet of their King , God giues it in his anger , and takes it away in his wrath . For by their abuse thereof , it proueth Satans bait to allure them , his snare to catch them , and his hooke to drowne them in perdition and destruction . In a word therefore , the wicked are fed in a faire pasture like oxen appointed to the slaughter : they are exalted on high , as on a ladder or scaffold , like theeues and traytors , to be brought downe with shame and destruction , as Pharaohs Baker was lift vp . §. 103. How both hauing , and wanting prosperitie is a blessing to the Saints . 5. Quest . How is the inioying , or wanting of prosperitie a blessing to the righteous ? Answ . God in wisdome knowing what is best for them accordingly deales with them , he bestoweth prosperitie on them so farre as he seeth it will turne vnto their good : and denieth it to them so farre as he seeth it will turne to their hurt . Whensoeuer therefore God bestoweth any temporall blessing on his Saints , it is a token of his favour : and whensoeuer he denieth any , the very deniall is also a fruit of his fauour . Herein is it verified that All things worke together for good to them that loue God , so as , if they abound , it shall goe well with them : if they want , it shall goe well with them : if they be in high place , it shall goe well with them : if in meane place , it shall got well with them : if they be at libertie , if in prison : if they be in health , if sicke : in what estate soeuer , it shall goe well with them . 6. Quest . How is it then that Saints are oft brought to such extermities that they are forced to complaine that it is very ill with them ? Answ . There is flesh and bloud in them , by reason of the weaknesse whereof they are forced to complaine : but the present apprehension of weake flesh , is not sufficient to impeach the truth of Gods promise : they consider not in their present extremitie what is Gods minde , what his manner of dealing with them , how needfull it is that so they should be dealt withall , what end and issue the Lord will giue : in truth it is better with them then they wot of . Some weightie reasons there be which moue God to bring them to that extremitie wherein they are , and those respecting his b owne glorie , or the c edification of others , or their owne good , as d curing some dangerous disease , e manifesting the grace of God bestowed vpon them , f drawing them neerer to God , g making them long the more for heauen , with the like . §. 104. Of long-life : how farre forth it is a blessing . Concerning the second branch of Gods promise ( long-life ) other questions are to be resolued . 1. Quest . Is long-life a blessing ? Answ . Yea , else would not God here and in other places haue promised it as a reward , nor haue bestowed it on his Saints . The reasons to proue it to be a blessing may be drawne to three heads . 1. Gods glorie . 2. the good of the Church where they liue . 3. their owne good . 1. Gods glorie is much aduanced by the long life of the Saints : for the longer they liue the more they doe themselues obserue Gods wonderfull workes , and the more they doe make them knowne and declare them to others . But in the graue all is forgotten . 2. Gods Church is greatly edified thereby : in which respect the Apostle saith , to abide in the flesh is more needfull for you : In the Saints that is true which Elihu saith should be , namely that daies speake , and multitude of yeeres teach wisdome . The longer the Saints liue , the more good they doe : but after death they doe none : when the night commeth no man can worke : vpon which ground the Apostle exhorteth to doe good while we haue time . 3. The Saints by long liuing purchase to themselues great honour , and dignitie among Gods people , and a strong stedfast confidence in God. Men regard a good old seruant : much more will God. Two strong props haue old Saints to establish them , and make them bold : one is a remembrance of Gods former fauours , whereby their hope of eternall life is made more sure vnto them : another is a kinde of present expectation of the accomplishment of Gods promises which they haue long waited for . By this it appeares that this particular promise is no light matter , of small moment : but a strong motiue to stirre vp children to obedience . §. 105. Of long life prouing a curse to the wicked . 2. Quest . Why then is long life giuen to many wicked ones ? and why are many Saints cut off ? Answ . Long life is of the same kinde that prosperitie is : it may be turned to a curse , as well as proue a blessing . The wicked by liuing long on earth make their sins grow to the full ( as is implied of the Amorite ) they make their name to stinke the more on earth , as a carion the longer it remaineth aboue ground the more it stinketh : and they cause the greater torment in hell to be inflicted vpon them : for as sinne is increased , so shall that torment be increased . The righteous haue their daies shortned for their good , when they are shortned , and that in these , and such like respects 1. That they may be m taken from the euill to come . 2. That they might be made an n example to others . 3. That o by a temporall death eternall condemnation might be auoided . 4. That their p chiefest and greatest reward might be hastened . §. 106. Of limiting the promises of temporall blessings . Thus we see there may be iust cause to alter , as the former branch of this promise , prosperitie , so the latter branch of it , long-life , and yet no wrong thereby redound to the righteous , nor benefit to the wicked . 3. Quest . Is not the truth of the promise impeached thereby ? Answ . No whit at all . For first all promises of temporall blessings are limited with such a condition as this , if the performance of it may stand with Gods honour , and the good of the partie to whom it is made . 2. God doth neuer simply depriue his Saints of that which is promised , but only in stead of it giueth a better : as in taking away wealth , he giueth the more store of grace : in restraining liberty of body , he giueth freedome of conscience : with affliction he giueth patience : by taking away this temporall life , he giueth eternall life . God herein dealeth , as if one who hauing promised so much iron , should in stead thereof giue as much siluer : or for siluer giue gold : and so for one pound giue the worth of hundreds or thousands . §. 107. Of appropriating prosperity and long-life to the obedience which children yeeld to their parents . 4. Quest . Why is long-life and prosperity appropriated to this kinde of righteousnesse ? Answ . It is not so appropriated to this , as if it appertained to no other : for it is elsewhere in generall promised to the obseruers of the whole law , and to other particular branches thereof beside this : yet in these and such like particular respects is it applied to the obedience of children . 1. Because obedience to parents is one of the surest euidences of our conformity to the whole law : in that thereby we shew our respect of Gods image , and lay a good foundation for the performing of all dutie to man. 2. Because a childes performing of his dutie to his parents is vnder God an especiall meanes that they doe well , and liue long ( for as rebellious children make their parents with griefe to come the sooner to their graues , so dutifull children make them to continue the longer in prosperity ) the Lord in recompence promiseth to such a childe prosperity and long life . 3. Because parents are an especiall meanes to procure the welfare and long life of their children , partly by their prouident care , as Noami said to Ruth , shall I not seeke rest for thee , that it may be well with thee ? and partly by their instant praier : for the faithfull praier of parents is of great force with God for dutifull children : whence hath risen the custome of childrens asking their parents blessing , and of parents blessing their children . In this respect the law thus setteth forth the blessing of the fift commandement , they shall prolong thy daies . 4. Because disobedience to parents bringeth much mischiefe on childrens heads , and oft shorteneth their daies , and that many waies . 1. In that parents are oft prouoked by their childrens disobedience to disinherit them , at least to allow them the lesse portion , so as hereby it goeth not so well with them : yea some are prouoked to bring their rebellious children to the Magistrate , who by Gods law was to cut them off , so as thereby their life is shortened . 2. In that parents are prouoked to complaine vnto God of their childrens disobedience , and God thereby moued both to lay heauie iudgements vpon such children in their life time , and also to shorten their daies : for parents complaint doth make a loud crie in Gods eares . It is said that God by cutting off Abimelech with an vntimely death rendred the wickednesse which he did to his father . 3. In that , when parents are too indulgent ouer their children , God doth punish the sinne both of parent and childe , by shortning the childes daies . Instance the examples of a Hophni and Phinehas , b Absolom , and c Adonijah . 4. In that disobedience to parents , is a sinne that seldome goeth alone : for an vndutifull childe is commonly a verie lewd person many other waies . Considering the prouenesse of our nature to all sinne , it cannot be auoided but that they who in the beginning shake off the yoake of gouernment , should run headlong into all riot , loosenesse , and licentiousnesse : thus then sinne being added vnto sinne , it must needs bring mischiefe vpon mischiefe , till at length life be cut off . Wherefore in that these mischiefes are auoided by performing due obedience to parents , it may well be said that it shall be well with obedient children , and they shall liue long . §. 108. Of Gods ordering his fauours so as they may appeare to be true blessings . The particular branches of Gods promise hauing beene distinctly opened , we will consider them ioyntly together , for they doe exceedingly amplifie one another : prosperity sweetens long life and makes it acceptable : otherwise to liue long , namely in misery and wretchednesse , is very irksome and grieuous . Againe , long life added to prosperity maketh it so much the greater blessing . For a good thing the longer it continueth the better it is . If prosperity were but as a flower , soone gone , the very thought of the vanity thereof would much diminish the ioy and comfort of it . But both of them ioyned together , doe shew that this is no small blessing which is promised . From the connexion of them both together , I obserue that God so ordereth his fauours as they appeare to be true blessings , tending indeed to the good of those vpon whom he bestoweth them . Thus when God gaue Abraham a sonne , he established his couenant with him , that this gift might be a true blessing . The like I might instance in all the children of promise , as Sampson , Salomon , Iohn Baptist , &c. So in other fauours . When God added fifteene yeares to Hezekiahs life , he also promised him deliuerance from his enemies , and peace , and truth all his daies : And when God gaue Dauid a kingdome , he gaue him great victories and long life , and established his kingdome to his posterity : so also dealt he with Salomon . But not to insist on any more particulars , excellently is this doctrine confirmed in the 28 Psalme . Thus God will shew that in loue he bestoweth euen the temporall blessings which he giueth to his Saints , that accordingly they may esteeme them , and that their hearts may be the more inlarged both to admire his goodnesse , and to be thankfull for the same . This vse we must make of those things which the Lord is pleased to bestow vpon vs , as of long life , good health , honour , peace , plenty , liberty , and all prosperity : we must receiue and vse them as God bestoweth them , namely as tokens of his fauour : and thereby be the more stirred vp to performe the duties he requireth of vs , and not abuse them to his dishonour and our owne hurt : but rather so as he may haue honour , and we profit thereby . §. 109. Of Gods high account of dutifull children . More particularly by this promise we may learne what high esteeme , and great account God maketh of dutifull children , and of that obedience which they performe to their parents : which ought so much the more to prouoke children to all obedience , if at least they haue any care of Gods fauour , and of the tokens of his loue . Oh consider this all yee that haue parents to honour : consider how carefull , how earnest God is euery way by all meanes to draw you to obedience : he contents not himselfe to vrge the equity of the point , the place of your parent , the charge that himselfe hath giuen , but most presseth your owne profit : and that not only in hope for the time to come , but euen in present fruition for this life : and that because we through our childishnesse are most affected with things sensible and present : dealing with vs as a tender father who prouideth not only a good calling , and a faire in heritance for his childe , but giueth him also plums , peares , and such things as for the present he is delighted withall , the more to allure him . §. 110. Of childrens doing good to themselues by honouring their parents . Children may further learne out of this promise , that in performing their dutie they doe good not only to their parents , but also to themselues : they procure their owne welfare and long-life . What egregious fooles then are disobedient children : they regard neither God , their parents , nor themselues , but depriue themselues of their eternall happinesse , hinder their welfare , and shorten their daies . Fitly hereupon I may applie to vndutifull children these words of the Psalmist , Marke the obedient childe , for the end of him is peace : but the rebellious shall be destroyed : he shall be cut off : and these of the wise-man , I know that it shall be well with the dutifull childe , but it shall not be well with the disobedient , he shall not prolong his daies : and these of the Prophet , Say ye to the obedient childe , it shall be well with him , he shall eat the fruit of his doings , but woe to the transgressor , it shall be ill with him . §. 111. Of parents doing good to their children by keeping them vnder obedience . Out of this promise parents may learne how to doe good for their children , how to prouide for their welfare , and long to preserue their life on earth ( a thing whereunto most parents are naturally giuen , and whereof they are much desirous ) namely by teaching children their dutie , by keeping them vnder obedience : thus haue they Gods promise to assure them , that it shall goe well with their children , and that they shall liue long . When parents are vpon their death-beds they may rest more securely vpon this promise then vpon great store of treasure laid vp for them , and great reuenues reserued for them . Many parents neglect themselues : they moile and toile , they carke and care , they pinch and spare , to leaue their children store of wealth , thinking thereby to doe good to their children , when as withall they too much cocker their children , giue the reines vnto them , and care not how little dutie they performe . Gods curse will lie vpon all the store that is laid vp for such children , as a fire to consume it all . Doth not daily experience verifie the truth hereof ? The iudgements which are laid on some such children , doe euidently manifest Gods iust indignation against all . Let not rich men therefore thinke they haue left their children well enough if they leaue them a large portion , but rather if they haue obserued them to be obedient children : and if poore mens children be such , let them not feare but that it shall goe well with them . It is said , that a good trade is better then house and land , but by vertue of this promise we may say that obedience in a childe is better then trade and all : this is the trade of a childes way which parents should teach children . Wherefore as parents are desirous of their childrens good , so they ought to be wise in procuring it , which is by teaching them this trade of obedience : and so they shall bring much comfort to themselues while they liue , and good to their children after them . §. 112. Of the perpetuitie of the substance of such things as in their circumstances respecting the Iewes are vanished . In laying downe this particular promise , the Apostle in stead of the limitation thereof vnto the Iewes in these words ( in the land which the Lord thy God shall giue thee ) putteth a generall word , which extendeth it to all nations , namely this ( in the earth ) whence I gather that The substance of these things which in some circumstances were after a peculiar manner restrained to the Iewes , remaineth in force to all Christians . The substance of this promise was , that it should goe well with obedient children , while here on earth they liued , and in this welfare they should long liue . The circumstance was , that in Canaan they should inioy that blessing . Though Christians liue not in Canaan , which is the circumstance , yet well it shall goe with them , and long they shall liue , which is the substance . Thus though the circumstance of Gods couenant with Abraham ( which was circumcision ) be abolished , yet the substance ( which is , to be our God , and the God of our seed ) remaineth . This might further be exemplified in many hundred instances : for the substance of all the Iewish sacrifices , and Sacraments , both ordinarie , and extraordinarie , of their Sabbaths , of their fasts , of their feasts , and the like , remaine , though the circumstances , as shadowes , be vanished away . Hence is it , that many promises made to them , are applied by the Apostles to Christians , as this , I will not faile thee , nor forsake thee : and in generall it is said , The promise to you and to your children , and to all that are afarra off . Hereby we may learne what vse to make of the old Testament , euen of those promises and priuiledges which in some particular respects were appropriated to the Iewes : namely , by obseruing the substance , and distinguishing it from the circumstance ; thus shall we finde that to be true which the Apostle speaketh of all the things which were written afore time , namely , that they were written for our learning . In this respect the same Apostle saith of the things recorded of Abraham , they were not written for his sake alone : and againe of the things recorded of the Israelites , they are written for our admonition . By this we may learne how to applie the preface to the ten Commandements , which mentioneth the deliuerance of Israel out of the bondage of Egypt . Pray therefore for the spirit of illumination to discerne betwixt substance and circumstance , in reading the old Testament especially . §. 113. Of the determined period of mans life . Hauing declared such orthodoxall points as this text affordeth , I will further note out two hereticall positions , which our aduersaries thence raise . One is of those , that to the dishonour of him whom God raised vp to be a worthy instrument in dispelling the mist of Poperie , which had much darkned the light of the Gospell , call themselues Lutherans : the other of Papists . The former is this , God hath not determined the set period of mans daies , but it is in mans power to lengthen or shorten them : for if it were otherwise , say they , this and such like promises of long life were to no purpose , nor yet the contrary threatnings of shortning mans daies . For full answer hereunto , I will first shew , that the position it selfe is directly contrarie to the current of Scripture , and then discouer the vnsoundnesse of their consequence . Touching the determined period of mans daies , thus speaketh the Scripture : Is there not an appointed time to man on earth ? are not his daies also as the daies of an hireling ? Note with what emphasis the point is set forth ; euen so , as if it were a point so cleare , as none could doubt of it . Note also two metaphors here vsed , which doe much cleare the point : one taken from souldiers , the other from hired seruants . That of souldiers is implied in the meaning of the originall word translated appointed time , but properly signifieth him that hath his time appointed for warfare , or the time it selfe so appointed : the other expressed . Now we know that these times are appointed to an houre : so is the time of mans life . In this respect Iob saith againe , all the daies of my appointed time will I wait , &c. where he vseth the same word that before in the same sense . To this purpose are these , and such like phrases frequently vsed in Scripture , determined daies , number of daies , houre , &c. Did not the Prophet expresly declare to Hezekiah that he should liue iust 15 yeeres after his sicknesse ? He could not haue told it , if the Lord had not before set that period . Christ saith , our haires are numbred , are not much more our daies ? Againe he saith , who can adde one cubit to his stature ? Can then any adde to his daies ? So euident is this point , that the heathen noted it . Touching their consequence ( if a mans time be determined all the promises of long life are to no purpose ) I answer , that God who hath set downe the iust time and period of mans life , hath also set downe the meanes of attaining to that period . Now the time he hath kept secret to himselfe , the meanes he hath reuealed to vs. In regard of vs therefore who know not the time appointed of the Lord , it may be said that by vsing such and such meanes we prolong our daies , or by doing such and such things we shorten them . Now because these meanes only shew them to be long , or short , Gods decree remaineth firme and stable , and is not altred thereby : yet this worke of lengthening or shortning is attributed to vs , because we doe what lieth in vs thereto , and that freely without any compulsion . For Gods decree though it cause a necessitie in the euent , yet it imposeth no constraint on the will of man , but leaueth it as free ( in regard of the manner of working ) as if there were no decree at all . And herein Gods admirable wisdome is manifested , that notwithstanding his determined purpose of matters , man hath no ground of excuse to say he was forced to this or that . The knowledge of this determined period of mans life is of great vse : for it teacheth vs , 1. Wholly to submit our selues to God : and to be prepared either soone to depart out of this world , or long to liue in it , as God shall dispose of our time : nor desiring longer to liue then God hath appointed : nor grieuing to liue so long as he hath appointed . 2. Not to feare the threats of any man , thereby to be drawne from God. 3. To doe Gods worke while we haue time , &c. §. 114. Of reward promised to obedience , that it implieth no merit . The other heresie which Papists gather from this text , is this , Mans obedience is meritorious . Answ . The reward here promised is no matter of wages and due desert , but of meere grace and fauour . Of this error I haue * elsewhere more largely spoken . §. 115. Of the connexion of Parents dutie with Childrens . EPHES. 6. 4. And ye fathers , prouoke not your children to wrath : but bring them vp in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. THe Apostle hauing vrged children to performe their duties to their parents , he turneth his speech to parents , saying , AND ye fathers , &c. That copulatiue particle AND , ioyning an exhortation to parents , for performing their duties to the forenamed exhortation made to children , giueth vs to vnderstand , that Parents are as well bound to dutie as children . Their duties indeed be different , yet ( notwithstanding their superioritie and authoritie ouer their children ) they are bound to dutie . All the directions and exhortations throughout the Scripture giuen vnto parents , concerning their dutie , and all the threatnings denounced , and iudgements executed on parents for neglect of their dutie , are pregnant proofes of this point . Though parents be ouer their children , and by them cannot be commanded , yet they are vnder God : and he it is who hath enioyned them their dutie : so as they are bound thereunto , as they will answer it to their Father in heauen . The authoritie which parents haue , is not so much for their owne aduancement , as for the better gouerning of their children , which being so , their verie gouernment is a dutie . Object . In the morall Law the dutie of children only is expressed . Answ . Parents dutie ( as many others duties ) is by iust and necessarie consequence implied , which is equiualent , and as much bindeth , as if it were expressed . It is thus implied . They who haue honour , must carrie themselues worthie of honour . Now the way to carrie themselues worthie of honour , is to be carefull in doing dutie to them that honour them . This is so equall , as it needed not to be exprest . Wherefore let Ministers follow this patterne of the Apostle , and carrie an euen hand towards all of all sorts : let them not be partiall in laying all the burden of dutie on childrens necks , and none on parents : holding in children verie straitly , but leauing parents to their owne will. Parents are flesh and bloud as well as children , and as prone to transgresse in their place , as children in theirs . Yea , Ministers ought of the two to be more earnest in vrging parents to performe their dutie , because they are vnder no such power and authoritie as children are . Feare of parents authoritie keepeth children much in awe . There is no such thing to keepe parents in awe . They will be more readie therefore to take the greater libertie , if by feare of God , and by a good conscience , they be not kept in compasse . Now ye ( ô parents ) as you looke for honour , carrie yourselues worthie of honour : as ye looke for dutie from your children , performe dutie to them . Know that another day , euen you shall be called to an account before the highest Iudge : your authoritie will then be no pretence to excuse , but an euidence to aggrauate your fault . For you being elder in yeeres , and more eminent in place , of more experience , and hauing a charge ouer your children , ought to be a light to shew them the way , an example to allure them , that they seeing you carefull and conscionable in performing your dutie , may be the more prouoked to performe theirs , or at least made ashamed of their neglect of dutie . But if you be carelesse of your dutie , how can ye expect dutie at their hands ? nay if by your ill example they haue beene made negligent , their bloud shall be required at your hands . §. 116. Of the extent of these words , Fathers , Children . Though the word ( Fathers ) be here vsed , which properly setteth forth naturall parents , and of naturall parents the male kinde , yet ( as in many other places ) it is to be taken in a larger extent : euen in as large as this word ( children ) was before , that so there may be a iust and equall relation betwixt children and parents : wherefore both sexes of naturall parents are comprised vnder it , euen mother as well as father , and they also who are in place of parents , whether by mariage as all sorts of fathers and mothers in Law , or by appointment , as all they who of right haue the custodie and charge of children , as Guardians , Tutors , and other like Gouernours : and so it is euerie way answerable to the word ( parents ) vsed in the first verse : and the word ( children ) is also here to be taken in the same extent , as it was there . §. 117. Of parents prouoking children . The next phrase ( prouoke to wrath ) is the exposition of one Greeke word , which being a compound word , cannot by one English word be fully expressed : the best and neerest that I can thinke of is ( exasperate . ) The word signifieth an extremitie in the vse of authoritie : euen too much austeritie and seueritie , whereby children are prouoked to wrath : which because it is a fault , it is here expresly forbidden ( prouoke not , &c. ) In this word there is a trope : the effect is put for the cause : The Apostles meaning is , that parents should take such heed of their cariage toward their children , as they giue them no occasion to be stirred vp to wrath . Vnder this word then are forbidden all such things , as may kindle wrath in children , as too much austeritie in cariage , sowrenesse in countenance , threatning and reuiling in words , too hard handling , too seuere correction , too much restraint of libertie , too small allowance of things needfull , with the like . Parents being flesh and bloud are subiect in this kinde to abuse their authoritie : yea , euen they who fall into the other extreme of too much indulgencie and cockering of their children , are verie prone to fall also into this extreme : as many who for the most part too much suffer their children without due restraint and correction to runne into all riot , will sometimes on a sudden , like Lions , flie vpon them , and after their owne pleasure correct them , and so exceedingly prouoke their children . Such as are most cockering , are most prone to prouoke to wrath : for , 1. Such least know how to keepe a meane : one will sooner leape out of one extreme into another , then goe from an extreme to the meane . 2. The children of such are soonest prouoked . Quest . Is it a thing lawfull and iustifiable in children to be prouoked to wrath by their parents ? Answ . * No. This prohibition intendeth no such thing : the Apostle hath here to doe with parents : and instructeth them how to preuent such mischiefes as their children through their weaknesse may fall into . So as here only he sheweth what is vnlawfull for parents , not what is lawfull for children . Hence then by the way I obserue that Parents must be so watchfull ouer their cariage , as thereby they make not their children to sinne . If they doe , they make their owne sinne the more hainous , and also they pull downe vpon their owne pates a farre more heauie vengeance , euen the vengeance of their owne sinne , and the vengeance of their childes sinne . For euery parent is made a watchman ouer his childe . If a watchman doe not what he can to hinder the sinne of such as are vnder his charge , he pulls their bloud on his owne necke . What doe they then that being watchmen , minister occasion of sinne to them that are vnder their charge ? §. 118. Of parents seeking the good of their children . That parents by auoiding the rocke of prouoking , fall not into the gulfe of cockering , the Apostle addeth a BVT , which is as a stop vnto them , and teacheth them that It is not sufficient for parents to preuent such mischiefes a● children may fall into , but they must also seeke their good . All the precepts in Scripture charging parents to seeke their childrens good , proue the point . Herein lieth a maine difference betwixt the affection which parents and strangers ought to beare toward children , and the dutie which one and the other owe to them . Meere strangers ought not to prouoke them : but parents ought moreouer euery way to seeke their good . The maine good which parents ought especially to seeke after in the behalfe of their children , is noted out in these words : Bring them vp in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. The word translated ( bring vp ) properly signifieth to feed or nourish with all needfull things ; it is the same that is vsed before in the 5. chapter and 29. verse , and there translated nourisheth . Not vnfitly might the proper signification of the word be here kept , as the best Latine translations , the French , and others haue kept . This word ioyned with the others that follow , may seeme at first sight to be here placed only to make vp the sense , as if he had thus said , nurture your childe in the wayes of God. But if the scope of the Apostle , and signification of the word be well weighed , we shall finde that it further implieth a generall dutie , which nature it selfe teacheth parents , euen this , that Parents ought to prouide all needfull things for their children : euen such things as tend to the nourishing of their bodies , and preseruing of their health and life : for this phrase ( to translate it word for word ) nourish them in discipline , or in instruction , is a concise speech , implying as much as if he had said , nourish and nurture them , or feed and instruct them . But the Apostle hath thus neerely and concisely ioyned them together , to shew that Nurture and instruction is as needfull and profitable , as food and apparell . §. 119. Of parents nurturing their children . The word translated nurture , signifieth as well correction as instruction : as Heb. 12. 7. If ye endure chastening : and 2 Tim. 3. 16. The Scripture is profitable for instruction in righteousnesse . Both senses will here stand , and our English word ( as well as the Greeke ) will beare both : for to nurture children , is as well to correct them , as to instruct them . Verie fitly is this aduice in this large acceptation inferred vpon the former prohibition : for lest parents should thereupon take occasion to lay the reines vpon their childrens necks , and let them run whither they list , the Apostle hereby teacheth , that Parents , as they may not be too austere , so neither too remisse . They must not prouoke their children to wrath , yet they must keepe them vnder discipline . The word translated nurture , according to the * Greeke notation thereof doth further set forth the meane betwixt the two forenamed extremes : for it noteth out such a discipline as befitteth a lad , or a young childe : so as the thing it selfe , discipline , by instruction and correction keepeth from one extreme of remisnesse : the kinde or manner of discipline being such as befitteth a childe , keepeth from the other extreme of rigour and crueltie . Extremes on either side are dangerous and pernicious , and that to parent and childe . For remisnesse will make children carelesse of all dutie to God and parent : rigour will make them desperate . But vertue and safetie consisteth in the meane betwixt both . §. 120. Of parents fixing precepts in their childrens mindes . This word ( admonition ) according to the * notation thereof , hath a particular relation to the minde , and pointeth out an informing and instructing of it . It is taken either for the action of admonishing , ( as Tit. 3. 10. reiect an hereticke a after the first and second admonition ) or for the b thing admonished , in which latter sense most doe here take it : yet would I not haue the former cleane excluded , for according to the full meaning of the word , I take thus much to be intended . As parents deliuer good precepts and principles to their children , so they must be carefull , by forcible and frequent admonitions , to fix and settle them in the minde of their children . c The Law expresseth as much by another metaphor which it vseth , in a direction which it giueth to parents , saying , thou shalt whet or sharpen Gods Lawes vpon thy children , that is , d thou shalt teach them diligently vnto them . The more paines is taken in this kinde , the lesse labour will be lost . That which at first is little heeded , by much vrging and pressing will for euer be held , as a naile that at one blow scarse entreth , with many blowes is knockt vp to the head . § 121. Of adding information to discipline . The addition of this word admonition vnto nurture , is not ( as some take it ) a meere explication of the same point , but also a declaration of a further dutie , which is this : As parents by discipline keepe their children vnder , so by information they must direct them in the right way . Salomon doth both deliuer the point , and also adde a good reason to inforce it : for saith he , Traine vp a childe in the way that he should goe ; there is the dutie : and when he is old , he will not depart from it ; there is the reason . Keeping a childe vnder by good discipline , may make him dutifull while the father is ouer him : but well informing his vnderstanding and iudgement , is a meanes to vphold him in the right way so long as he liueth . §. 122. Of parents teaching their children the feare of God. The last word ( of the Lord ) intimateth the best dutie that a parent can doe for his childe . Admonition of the Lord , declareth such principles as a parent hath receiued from the Lord , and learned out of Gods word : such as may teach a childe to feare the Lord , such as tend to true pietie and religion : whence further I obserue , that Parents must especially teach their children their dutie to God. Come children ( saith the Psalmist ) hearken vnto me , I will teach you the feare of the Lord. Of this particular more largely * hereafter . §. 123. Of the subiection which beleeuing seruants owe. Because there is yet another order in the family besides those which haue been noted before , namely the order of Masters & seruants , the Apostle prescribeth also vnto them their dutie . As he began with wiues and children , in the two former orders , so here he beginneth with seruants who are the inferiours , for the same reasons * before rendred . The Apostle is somewhat copious in laying forth the duties of seruants , and in vrging them to performe their dutie ; and that for two especiall reasons : One in respect of those , whose masters were infidels : another in respect of those , whose masters were Saints . 1. Many seruants there were in those daies wherein the Gospell was first preached to the Gentiles , that by the preaching thereof were conuerted , whose masters embraced not the Gospell : whereupon those seruants began to conceit that they being Christians , ought not to be subiect to their masters that were infidels . 2. Other seruants there were whose Masters beleeued the Gospell as well as they : now because the Gospell taught , that there is neither bond nor free , but all are one in Christ Iesus : they thought that they ought not to be subiect to their master who was their brother in Christ . These two preposterous and presumptuous conceits doth the Apostle intimate , and expresly meet with in b another place . And because they had taken too deepe rooting in the mindes of many seruants , the Apostle here in this place laboureth the more earnestly to root them out , and that by a thorow pressing vpon their conscience that subiection wherein they are bound to their masters , as masters , whatsoeuer their disposition were . Hereof more * afterwards . Here by the way , note three points . 1. The Gospell doth not free inferiours from that subiection to men whereunto by the morall law they are bound . 2. Men are ready to turne the grace of God into libertie . 3. As errors begin to sprout vp in the Church , Ministers must be carefull to root them out . §. 124. Of the meaning of the fift verse . EPHES. 6. 5. Seruants be obedient to them that are your Masters according to the flesh , with feare and trembling in singlenesse of your heart , as vnto Christ . THis title ( Seruants ) is a generall title , which may be applied to all such as by any outward ciuill bond , or right , owe their seruice to another : of what sex soeuer the persons themselues be : or of what kinde soeuer their seruitude is : whether more seruile or liberall . Seruile , as being borne seruants , or sold for seruants , or taken in warre , or ransomed ; For of old they were called seruants , who being taken in warre , were saued from death . Liberall , as being by voluntary contract made seruants , whether at will , as some seruing-men , iournie men , and labourers ; or for a certaine terme of yeeres , as prentises , clearkes , and such like . Wherefore whatsoeuer the birth , parentage , estate , or former condition of any haue beene ; being Seruants they must be subiect , and doe the dutie of seruants : the Apostles indefinite title ( seruants ) admitteth no exception of any . The other title ( Masters ) hath as large an extent comprising vnder it both sexes , Masters and Mistresses : and of these all sorts , great and meane , rich and poore , strong and weake , faithfull and infidels , true professors and profane ; superstitious , idolatrous , hereticall persons , or the like : so as No condition or disposition of the master exempteth a seruant from performing dutie to him . Among other degrees and differences , most especially let it be noted that both sexes , mistresses as well as masters , are here meant , that so the duties which are enioyned to be performed to masters may answerably be performed to mistresses ( so farre as they are common to both ) and that both by maid-seruants , and also by men-seruants that are vnder mistresses . In families mistresses are as ordinary as masters , and therefore I thought good to giue an especiall item of this . Vnder this word ( obey ) are comprised all those duties which seruants owe to their masters : it is the same word that was before vsed in the first verse : and it hath as large an extent here being applied to seruants , as it had there being applied to children : It sheweth that The rule of seruants ( as seruants ) is the will of their Master . This clause ( according to the flesh ) is by some referred to the action of obedience , as if it were added by the Apostle to shew what kinde of obedience seruants owe to their masters , namely a ciuill , corporall obedience in temporall things , opposed to that spirituall obedience which is due to God alone . Ans . Though distinction may be made betwixt that seruice which is due to God , and that which is due to man , yet this application of this phrase in this place may giue occasion to seruants to thinke that if they performe outward seruice to their masters all is well , they owe no inward feare , or honour , which is an error that the Apostle doth here mainly oppose against . But because this clause ( according to the flesh ) is immediatly ioyned to Masters , I referre it to the persons to whom obedience is to be giuen , and so take it as a description of them , as if he had said , to fleshly or bodily Masters . The Apostle thus describeth masters for these reasons . 1. For distinction : to shew he meanes such masters as are of the same mould that seruants are : so distinguishing them from God who is a spirit : thus doth the Apostle distinguish betwixt fathers of our flesh , and father of spirits . 2. For preuention : left seruants might say , our masters are flesh and bloud as we are , why then should we be subiect to them ? To meet with that conceit , the Apostle expresly saith that obedience is due to masters after the flesh . 3. For mitigation of their seruitude : for their masters being flesh , they haue no power but ouer the bodies of their seruants : their spirits are free from them : in which respect the Apostle calleth Christian seruants the Lords freemen . 4. For consolation against their present condition , which is but for a time , because their masters are flesh : whatsoeuer is according to the flesh is of no long continuance , but hath his date . 5. For direction : to shew in what things especially that obedience which properly belongeth to a master consisteth : namely in ciuill , outward things : for euery one must be serued according to his nature . As God being spirit , must in spirit be serued : so man being flesh must in flesh be serued . Now this seruice in the flesh is not opposed to sincere and vpright seruice , but to spirituall . Thus by consequence that may be intended , which some would haue principally to be meant . Obiect . Masters may command spirituall things , namely to worship God , and after such and such a manner . Answ . Of his owne head he cannot command such things : there must be an higher warrant for the doing of them then the commandement of a man. A maine point here intended is this , that Masters are not to be lightly respected because they be after the flesh : that is , weake , fraile , of short continuance , of the same nature that seruants are . Lest vpon the forenamed description of masters , seruants should take to themselues too much heart , the Apostle annexeth this clause ( with feare and trembling , &c. ) which hath relation to the manner of their obedience . No slauish feare is here meant , as if seruants should liue in continuall dread , or tremble at the sight of their masters : a seruant by the tyrannie of some master may be brought so to doe : but to doe so is no Christian dutie : that which the Apostle here requireth is a dutie belonging to all Christian seruants towards all sorts of masters , euen the mildest that be . It is therefore an awfull respect of the authority of a master , and a dutifull reuerence to his person which is here required : and it is opposed to sawcinesse , malepartnesse , boldnesse , stoutnesse , answering againe , murmuring and muttering against their masters , and other like vices . To shew how foule those faults be , and what great respect seruants ought to beare to their masters , these two words ( feare , and trembling ) are ioyned together : which in effect declare one and the same thing : but yet for explication sake they may be distinguished . For * Feare signifieth a reuerend respect of one : it is that which in the former Chapter was required of wiues : though the thing in generall which is required of wiues and seruants is the same , yet the particular manner and measure of a seruants feare is farre different . * Trembling is more proper to seruants : it is a dread of punishment : and it is required of seruants , not as if they should doe all things simply for feare of punishment , but because God hath put a staffe into a masters hands , seruants must tremble at that power their masters haue , and feare to prouoke them to strike . To this purpose saith the Apostle to subiects in regard of the power which a Magistrate hath , be afraid , for he beareth not the sword in vaine . Hence learne that The authority of a Master ought to strike a seruants heart with dread . The dread which seruants ought to haue of their masters power and authority maketh many to care for no more then to auoid their masters displeasure : wherefore the Apostle addeth a further degree of a seruants subiection , namely that it be in singlenesse of heart , that is , honest , intire , vpright : for this is opposed to hypocrisie , dissimulation , and fraud : yea of YOVR heart , not anothers : another in the simplicity of his heart may thinke you doe a thing better then you doe , by a charitable construction of euerie thing , but if in singlenesse of your owne heart you doe it , it will in truth be as it appeareth to be . So as All the seruices which seruants performe to their masters must be done in truth and vprightnesse . The Apostle giues this direction to Christians who haue to doe not only with masters according to the flesh ( who only see the outward appearance ) but also with the master of spirits who looketh on the heart : and therefore also he added this clause , as vnto Christ : teaching seruants thereby that Seruants in their obedience to their masters , must approue themselues to Iesus Christ as well as to their masters after the flesh . This phrase ( as vnto Christ ) implieth as much as that ( in the Lord ) whereof we spake * before . §. 125. Of the meaning of the sixt verse . EPHES. 6. 6. Not with eie seruice , as men-pleasers , but as the seruants of Christ , doing the will of God from the heart . THis and the verse following are added as a further explication of the last clause of the former verse . It should seeme that seruants , howsoeuer they might in some measure performe the maine dutie of obedience , yet failed exceedingly in the manner of performing it . Because masters were but men , masters according to the flesh , who neither had power ouer the heart , nor could discerne the disposition thereof , seruants thought they had well done their dutie , if they had outwardly performed what their master required : now to root out this bitter weed , and to reforme this corrupt conceit , the Apostle is more large in cleering the point of sincere and vpright seruice : therefore , the more fully to expresse his minde and meaning , first he layeth downe the vice contrarie to the foresaid sincerity ( for contraries laid together doe much set forth one another ) and then returneth more distinctly to declare the vertue . Whence note Those points are most to be vrged vpon people , wherein they most faile . The vice here noted to be contrarie to sincere seruice is termed eie-seruice . Our English word doth properly and fitly answer the originall , both in the notation , and in the true sense and meaning of it . It implieth a meere outward seruice only to satisfie the eie of man : And that is twofold , Hypocriticall , Parasiticall .   Hypocriticall seruice is that which is meerely in shew : when that is pretended to be done which indeed is not done ; as if a seruant should come from his masters worke all in a sweat , as if he had taken extraordinary paines therein , whereas he hath done nothing at all , but otherwise made himselfe to sweat , or only made a shew of sweat . Parasiticall seruice is that which is indeed done , but in presence of the master : such seruants are they who will be very diligent and faithfull in doing such things as their masters see , or shall come to their notice : but otherwise behinde their masters backe , and in things which they hope shall neuer come to his knowledge , they will be as negligent , and vnfaithfull as if they were no seruants . Yet to satisfie their masters , and to sooth them , they will doe any thing though neuer so vnlawfull . From this vice thus discouered note , that God requireth more then that which may satisfie mans eie . Gods eie is a piercing eie , and can see much foulnesse , where to mans eie all things seeme very faire : so as they much deceiue themselues who thinke all is well because no man can say to them , blacke is thine eie . Those that content themselues with doing eie-seruice the Apostle here termeth men-pleasers : which title he giueth vnto them for two especiall reasons . 1. To shew the ground of eie-seruice : which is because all their care is to please their master , who is a man : for well they know that man can see but the outward shew , or that which is done before his face . 2. To shew the hainousnesse of that sinne : for it is tainted with Atheisme , in that the man guilty thereof hath no respect to God : but preferreth his master before God : he careth not to please God so he please his master : for this is the emphasis of that word ( men-pleasers ) It is spoken in opposition to God , as the Apostle implieth in another place , saying , If I yet pleased men , I should not be the seruant of Christ . Obiect . How can it be so hainous a sinne to be men-pleasers , when the Apostle aduiseth seruants to please their masters in all things ? 1. Answ . The aduice there giuen is not simply to please , but to * please well , as the originall word properly signifieth , and the Kings translators haue fitly turned it . 2. Answ . That generall particle ( all things ) must be restrained to the duties of a seruant , and to all the parts of obedience , which he there mentioneth in the words immediatly going before . Seruants therefore must please their masters in all things that their masters haue power to require at their hands , and they are bound to doe . Men-pleasing , here spoken of , is opposed to pleasing of God. Pleasing of men there mentioned is subordinate to our pleasing of God : here to please men is to sooth them vp in euerie thing good or euill : there to please them is conscionably to obey them in euerie lawfull thing . Here is condemned a seeking to please men in the first place , and that only , and wholly in euery thing , whereas we ought first to seeke Gods approbation , then the testimony of a good conscience , and after these a pleasing of men , but in , for , and vnder God. Hence then obserue that A seruant must not wholly giue himselfe to sooth and please his master : for so may he in many things highly displease Almighty God. To auoid the two forenamed sinnes , eie-seruice , and men-pleasing , the Apostle giueth an excellent direction in these words , as the seruants of Christ doing the will of God from the heart , where we may obserue Seruants of Christ to be opposed to men-pleasers , and doing Gods will from the heart to eie-seruice . Seruants of Christ , are they who know that their masters are in Christs place , beare his image , haue their authority from him , and are vnder him : so as in seruing their masters they serue Christ : and so farre as they may serue both together , they will : but if they proue contrarie masters , and thereupon one of necessity must be left , then they will cleaue vnto the highest master , which is Christ : and in this respect they are called the Lords freemen , 1. Cor. 7. 22. Thus we see how a seruant may be no seruant , if he doe all things for the Lord. From this opposition betwixt men-pleasers and seruants of Christ , note that They who in all things giue themselues to please men are no seruants of Christ . That we may the better know who are seruants of Christ , the Apostle addeth a description of them in these words ( doing the will of God from the heart . ) Christs will is Gods will : for as Christ is God , the fathers will and his is all one : as he is man he wholly ordereth his will by his fathers , he seeketh not his owne will , but the will of the father that sent him . This description of a seruant of Christ the Apostle addeth partly as a direction to seruants to teach them how in seruing their masters , they may be seruants of Christ , ( namely , in hauing an eie to Gods word , whereby his will is reuealed both for the matter and manner of all things which they doe ) and partly as a motiue to perswade them to be content with their place , and cheerefully to doe their dutie , because so is the will of God. Gods will is that which must direct and settle euery one in the things which they doe : for Gods will is the rule of that which is right . Euery thing is very right which he willeth : and nothing is right that swerueth from his will. To put a difference betwixt Christ and other masters , and to shew that he looketh not ( as man doth ) vpon the outward appearance , but beholdeth the heart , the Apostle annexeth this clause ( from the heart . ) And it declareth that A good thing must be well done . To doe that which is Gods will , commended by his word , is for substance a good thing : to doe it from the heart , is the right manner of doing it : That which being good is done after a right manner , is well done . §. 126. Of the meaning of the seuenth verse . EPHES. 6. 7. With good will doing service as to the Lord and not to men . IN this verse the Apostle doth yet againe inculcate the forenamed point concerning seruants manner of obeying their masters , and their care therein to approue themselues to their highest master : whence obserue that Matters needfull and weightie are againe and againe to be pressed . This is a needfull point , because seruants exceedingly faile therein : and a weightie point it is , because all the comfort and benefit of seruice consisteth in Gods approbation . But the former point is not here meerely and barely repeated , but so set downe as other good directions are afforded to seruants for their manner of obedience . 1. To serue with good will , is somewhat more then with singlenesse of heart . For it further implieth 1. A readinesse and cheerefulnesse in doing a thing ; a doing it with a good minde , as the notation of the Greeke word sheweth . 2. A desire and endeuour that their masters may reape profit and benefit by their seruice : whereby they shew that they beare a good will , and good minde to their masters . In setting downe seruants duties , the Apostle vseth another word then before in the fift verse , namely this ( doing seruice ) wherby he sheweth that a seruants place and dutie is of a more abiect and inferiour kinde then the place and dutie of a childe or a wife : the former word ( a obey ) was common to all : this word ( b doing seruice ) is proper to seruants : and the very title of a c seruant , is deriued from thence . Hence note that Though wiues and children be inferiours as well as seruants , yet may not seruants looke for such priuiledges as they haue . Another manner of subiection must be performed by seruants . The clause annexed ( as to the Lord ) is in effect the same with that in the 5. verse ( as to Christ ) for by the Lord he here meaneth The Lord Christ . But it is added to meet with a secret Obiection . For if seruants should say , You require us to serue our masters with good will , but what if they be hard-hearted and regard not our good will , but peruert our good minde ? The Apostle giueth them this answer , Looke not so much to men and their reward , as to God and his reward : serue men in and for the Lord , euen as if you serued God : so shall not your seruice be in vaine . The inference of the eighth verse vpon this , sheweth that this is it which the Apostle here intendeth . Learne therefore that An eie is to be cast vpon God euen in those duties which we performe to men : and that both for approbation and reward from God. The negatiue clause which followeth in these words ( and not to men ) is not simplie to be taken ( for then would it thwart the maine scope of the Apostle in this place ) but comparatiuely in relation to God , and that in two respects . 1. That seruice be not done only to men . 2. That seruice be not done to men in and for themselues . Seruice must be done to God as well as men : yea In that seruice which we doe to men , we must serue God. Men must be serued for the Lords sake , because the Lord hath commanded it , because they beare the Lords image , and stand in his stead : in the Lord , and vnder the Lord. From this large declaration of the manner of doing seruice to masters note the difference betwixt such seruants as are seruants of men , and such as are seruants of Christ . 1. They doe all to the eie . These all from the heart . 2. They seeke to please men . These doe the will of God. 3. They doe their seruice discontentedly . These cheerefully . 4. They doe all vpon selfe-loue . These with good will. §. 127. Of the meaning of the eight verse . EPHES. 6. 8. Knowing that whatsoeuer good thing any man doth , the same shall he receiue of the Lord whether he be bond or free . GReat is the ingratitude of many masters : they will exact all the seruice that a poore seruant possibly can doe , but slenderly recompence his paines : yea , it may be , very euilly reward the same , not affording competent food , clothing , lodging , but frownes , checkes , and blowes . Now to vphold seruants in such straits , and to incourage them to doe their dutie whether their masters regard it or no , the Apostle in this verse laboureth to raise vp their mindes to God : and to shew vnto them that he regardeth them , and will sufficiently reward them , so as Seruants labour shall not be in vaine in the Lord. To presse this incouragement the more vpon them , he setteth it downe as a thing granted by all , so cleere as none of them can be ignorant thereof ( Knowing ) as if he had said , ye all well enough know that what I now say is most true : hence note that Gods respect of faithfull seruants is so well knowne , as none that haue any vnderstanding can be ignorant thereof . The Apostles argument is drawne from the generall to a particular , and the generality is noted in the thing done ( whatsoeuer ) and in the person that doth it ( any man. ) But because the generalitie of the thing might be too farre stretched , he addeth this limitation ( good ) and because the generalitie of the person might be too much restrained , he addeth this explication ( whether bond or free . ) This distinction is vsed because in those daies many seruants were bond-men and bond-women . Now the Apostles argument may thus be framed : Euery one of what estate and degree soeuer he be , shall be rewarded of God for euery good thing he doth , be it great or small . Therefore euery seruant shall be rewarded of God for euery good seruice . The recompence promised is set forth vnder a concise speech ( the same shall he receiue ) meaning that he shall receiue a reward for the same : that phrase hath relation to the crop which an husbandman receiueth of the corne he sowed , which is of the same kinde he sowed : m the seed being wheat , the crop is of wheat : the n seed being plentifully sowed , the crop will be plentifull : to the same purpose saith this Apostle in another place , whatsoeuer a man soweth o that shall he also reape . Now to applie this , seruants that by their faithfull seruice bring honour and glory to God , shall againe receiue honour and glorie . If they aske of whom they shall receiue it , the Apostle expresly answereth , Of the Lord : for it is the Lord that said , p Them that honour me will I honour . God will not forget them , though their masters may . From this verse thus opened , I gather these particular obseruations , concerning seruants . 1. Seruants may and ought to applie vnto themselues generall promises made to Christians . Otherwise this generall argument of the Apostle is to little purpose in this place . 2. A Christian may be a bond-slaue : for the Apostle directeth this incouragement to Christians , among whom he presupposeth some to be slaues , opposing them to free-men , who also were seruants . 3. Faithfull seruice performed to men is a good thing : for the good things which seruants especially doe is in their seruice . 4. As God accepteth not men because they are free , so neither reiecteth he them because they are bond . It is not the person , but the worke that he regardeth . 5. The faithfull seruice of seruants is as good seed sowen : it will bring forth a good crop . The metaphor here intimated implieth as much . 6. God is honoured by the faithfull seruice of seruants : this is intimated by the application of Gods reward to them , for God honoureth none but them which honour him . §. 128. Of the connexion of masters duties with seruants . EPHES. 6. 9. And ye masters doe the same things vnto them , forbearing threatning : knowing that your master also is in heauen : neither is there respect of persons with him . TO the duties of seruants the Apostle adioyneth the duties of masters , saying , AND ye masters : whence learne that Masters are as well bound to dutie as seruants . A like doctrine was noted from the connexion of parents duties with childrens : there you may see this generall further amplified , § . 115. 1. Gods law requireth as much : for it expresly inioyneth many duties to masters ( as in the eighth treatise following we shall see . ) 2. So doth also the law of nature which hath tied master and seruant together by a mutuall and reciprocall bond , of doing good , as well as of receiuing good . 3. The law of nations requireth also as much : For in all nations where euer there was any good gouernment , and where wise , and good lawes were made , particular lawes of the duties of masters haue beene made . 4. The law of equitie doth so also . One good deserueth another good : therefore the Apostle saith to masters , giue vnto your seruants that which is iust and equall . Now let masters take notice hereof : and know that God the great Lord of all hath made this relation betwixt master and seruant , and hath set each of them in their seuerall and distinct places for the mutuall good of one another , so as seruants are no more for the good of masters , then masters are for the good of seruants . Wherefore , as they looke for dutie , let them performe dutie : if seruants faile in their dutie , let masters see if they themselues be not the cause thereof , by failing in theirs . Their authoritie will be no excuse before Christ , but a meanes to aggrauate their fault , and increase their condemnation : for the greater the talent is , the more diligence is expected , and the straiter account shall be exacted . §. 129. Of the meaning of this phrase , Doe the same things . These two titles ( Masters , Seruants ) are so taken here as they were * before in the fift verse . All the duties of masters are comprised vnder this phrase , doe the same things : which at first sight may seeme to be somewhat strange : for may some say , The things which seruants must doe are these , to feare , to obey , to doe seruice , with the like , and are masters to doe the same things ? Answ . 1. These words are not to be referred to those particular duties which are proper to seruants , but to those generall rules of equitie which are common to masters as well as seruants ; namely , that in their seuerall places , with singlenesse of heart , as vnto Christ , not with eie seruice as men pleasers , but as the seruants of Christ they doe the will of God from the heart . 2. Those words may be referred to the eight verse , the verse going immediatly before , which laieth downe a generall rule for all men in their seuerall places to doe the good things of their places . Now then as seruants must haue an eie to their places to doe the good things thereof , so masters must doe the same things : that is , they must haue an eie to their places , to doe the good things thereof . 3. Those words may be taken without reference to any former words , and expounded of a mutuall , reciprocall , and proportionable dutie that ought to passe betwixt master and seruant : not in the particulars , as if the same duties were to be performed by each of them , for that were to ouerthrow the order and degrees which God hath set betwixt master and seruant , to crosse Gods ordinance , and inferre contradiction : but in generall , that duties are to be performed of each to other : in which respect the Apostle said * before of all sorts , superiours , and inferiours , Submit your selues one to another . And thus by this phrase the doctrine before mentioned is confirmed , that Masters are as well bound to dutie as seruants . None of these answers thwart another , but all of them may well be admitted , and all of them well stand together . They all imply a common equitie betwixt masters and seruants , but no equalitie : mutuall duties , but diuers and distinct duties , appertaining to their seuerall places . Compare with this text , that which the Apostle himselfe hath more plainly and fully noted ( Col. 4. 1. ) and we shall obserue him to expound his own meaning , for that which here he implieth vnder this phrase ( the same things ) that he expresseth there vnder these two words , iust , equall : whereof we shall * hereafter more distinctly speake . Purposely doth the Apostle infold masters duties vnder this generall phrase ( the same things ) to preuent a secret obiection raised from the eminency and superioritie of masters aboue seruants , which maketh them thinke , that seruants are only for the vse of masters , and that masters are no way tied to their seruants . But if in the generall masters must doe the same things , then they are for their seruants good , as well as seruants for theirs . §. 130. Of masters forbearing threatning . The Apostle in these words ( forbearing threatning ) doth not simply forbid all manner of threatning , but only prescribe a moderation thereof : and * so much haue the Kings translators well expressed in the margin against this Text. Threatning is a dutie which , as occasion serueth , masters ought to vse , and that to preuent blowes . But men in authoritie are naturally prone to insult ouer their inferiours , and to thinke that they cannot shew their authoritie but by austerit ie : for which reason the Apostle dehorteth husbands from a bitternesse , and parents from b prouoking their children to wrath . Besides , the * Gentiles and Heathen thought that they had an absolute power ouer seruants , and that of life and death : whereupon the Roman Emperors made lawes to restraine that rigour : for they would vse their seruants like beasts . Now that Christian masters should not be of the same minde , the Apostle exhorteth them to forbeare threatning . Hence note that Authoritie must be moderated and kept in compasse : else will it be like a swelling riuer without bankes and wals . Threatning is here put for all manner of rigor , whether in heart , looke , words , or actions : for it is vsuall in Scripture to put one instance for all of the same kinde . Forbearing , implieth a restraint of all manner of excesse , as 1. In time and continuance : when there is nothing but continuall threatning vpon euery small and light occasion . 2. In measure ; when threatning is too fierce , and violent , so as it maketh the heart to swell againe , and as it were fire to come out of the eies , and thunder out of the mouth , and the body to shake in euery part thereof . 3. In execution ; when euery vengeance once threatned shall surely be put in execution , though the partie that caused the threatning be neuer so sorie for his fault , and humble himselfe , and promise amendment , and giue good hope thereof . Woe were it with vs the seruants of the high God , if he should so deale with vs. Here note that men may exceed in doing a bounden dutie : and so turne a needfull vertue into an hurtfull vice : great respect therefore must be had to the manner of doing good and lawfull things . Yet further for the extent of this prohibition , we are to know that vnder the vice forbidden the contrarie vertues are commanded , as mildnesse , gentlenesse , patience , long suffering , with the like . §. 131. Of masters subiection to a greater master . The latter part of this verse containeth a reason to enforce the directions in the former part . The reason in summe layeth downe that subiection wherein masters are vnder God. A point whereof none of them could be ignorant , and therefore he thus setteth it downe , knowing : for , All men know that there is an higher then the highest on earth . The light of nature reuealeth as much , no Pagan , much lesse Christian , can be ignorant thereof . In that speaking to masters he telleth them that they haue a master , thereby he giueth them to vnderstand , that They which are in authoritie , are also vnder authoritie : masters haue a master . For God is Lord of Lords , Master of masters . In this respect saith Ioseph a great Gouernour , am not I vnder God ? These two little particles ( euen your , or your also ) adde some emphasis : hauing reference to seruants , as if he had said , as well your master , as your seruants master . Some Greeke copies , for more perspicuitie , thus read it ( both your and their master ) the sense is all one which way soeuer we read it : It sheweth that in relation to God , Masters and seruants are in the same subiection , and vnder a like command . There is one master , euen Christ : and all men whosoeuer are brethren , fellow-seruants . §. 132. Of Gods being in heauen . That great Master , vnder whom all masters on earth are , is here said to be in heauen , the more to commend and set forth his dignitie and authoritie : and to make masters to stand in the more awe of him : To like purpose Dauid hauing set forth God sitting in the heauens , inferreth this exhortation vnto the great Commanders on earth , Be wise now therefore , ôye Kings , be instructed , ye Iudges of the earth : Serue the Lord with feare , and reioyce with trembling . Object . This placing of God in heauen , maketh such as feare not God the more insolent and secure : for they will be readie to thinke and say , How doth God know ? can he iudge thorow the darke cloud ? Thicke clouds are a couering to him that he seeth not , and he walketh in the circuit of he auen ? Answ . 1. The Apostle wrote to Christian masters , who thought better of God then such Atheists did . 2. The placing of God in heauen doth not bound him within the compasse thereof : for c the heauen , and the heauen of heauens cannot containe him . d He filleth heauen and earth . e Though heauen be his throne , yet the earth also is his footstoole . But because the Lord doth most manifest his glorie in heauen , and from heauen , therefore * by an excellencie is he said to be in heauen : and that in three especiall respects . 1. To shew that there is no proportion betwixt him and earthly masters , be they neuer so great . For as the heauen is higher then the earth , so is God more excellent , yea infinitely more excellent then any man. Who is like vnto the Lord our God who dwelleth on high ? There is no such difference betwixt masters and seruants on earth . 2. To shew that he hath his eyes continually on all his seruants : he seeth euerie thing that they doe , as one placed aboue others seeth all that are vnder him . g From heauen doth the Lord behold the earth . h The Lord looketh from heauen , he beholdeth all the sonnes of men . i The eyes of the Lord are in euerie place , beholding the euill and the good . So as this phrase noteth the cleane contrarie to that which was before obiected by wicked Atheists . 3. To shew that he is Almightie : able both to recompence his faithfull seruants ( whereupon Dauid saith , Unto thee lift I vp mine eyes , ô thou that dwellest in the heauens ) and also to execute vengeance on those that are vnfaithfull to God , and cruell to their seruants ( whereupon saith Salomon , if thou seest oppression &c. maruell not : for he that is higher then the highest regardeth . ) From this place of God ( in heauen ) we learne these lessons . 1. The eie of faith is needfull to behold God withall , for heauen is too high for any bodily eie to pierce into . But by Faith did Moses see him who is inuisible . 2. Though masters had none on earth aboue them , yet is there one higher then they . There is a master in heauen . 3. They who cannot be heard on earth , haue yet one to appeale vnto . There is a master in heauen . 4. The command vnder which earthly masters are , is farre greater then that which they haue : for their commander is in heauen . §. 133. Of Gods hauing no respect of persons . The Apostle further addeth of God the great master of all , that with him there is no respect of persons . The Hebrew word vsed to set forth this point signifieth a a face : so doth also the Greeke word here translated * person : it signifieth both face and person . Now we know that the face of a man is outward , and that which of all other parts maketh him most amiable in anothers eie . It is opposed to that which is inward , euen the heart : in which respect it is said that the Lord seeth not as man seeth , for man looketh on the outward appearance , but the Lord looketh on the heart . Here by a Synecdoche , face or person is put for euery outward quality , state , or condition which maketh one to be preferred before another in mans approbation , as beautie , comelinesse , stature , wealth , honour , authoritie , and the like . Now in that God receineth not , or respecteth not persons , it sheweth that God preferreth not any one before another for any the forenamed outward respects , or any other like to them . Elihu plainly expoundeth this phrase in these words , he accepteth not the person of princes , nor regardeth the rich more then the poore . The phrase is taken from them that sit in thrones of iudgement , where their eies should be blinded , that they may not see the face or person of those that are brought before them : but only heare the cause . This properly is here noted of God , to meet with a vaine conceit of many masters , who though they know that God is their master as well as their seruants master , yet thinke that God will not call them so straitly to account , but wil suffer and tolerate them , because they are of a higher ranke , and in a better condition then seruants : But by this phrase the Apostle sheweth that To God all are alike : he putteth no difference betwixt any . He will shew fauour to the meanest , as well as to the greatest : he will take vengeance of the greatest as well as of the meanest . Many good lessons may be learned from hence : as among other , these , 1. The poorest and meanest that be may haue as free accesse to God as the wealthiest and greatest : and their sure shall be as soone receiued . 2. The great ones on earth , haue as great cause to feare the reuenging hand of God for any sinne , as meane ones . 3. It becommeth magistrates and all in authority to carrie themselues impartially towards all that are vnder them : for they are in Gods roome . Respect of persons is the cause of all that iniustice and wrong which magistrates doe . 4. It becommeth ministers to be faithfull in all Gods house , and with an euen hand to sow the seed of Gods word , and to keepe themselues pure from the bloud of all men : for they are Gods stewards and ambassadors ; and therefore they must haue no respect of persons . The second Treatise . PART I. Of Husband and Wife , who are so to be accounted . §. 1. Of those who may seeke to be maried . HAuing in the former treatise laid downe the foundation of all domesticall duties , by expounding the words of the Apostle , I purpose now distinctly to lay them forth in order : beginning with the first and chiefest couple in the family , Man and Wife . Here we are first to speake of the persons who are to be accounted true and lawfull husband and wife : and then of the duties which they owe each to other . So as this Treatise consisteth of two parts . 1. The first declareth , who are man and wife . 2. The second noteth out those common mutuall duties which they owe one to another . First of the first . Husband and wife are they who are rightly ioyned together by the bond of mariage . * Whereby two are made one flesh . For the better cleering of this point , we will consider both the parties that may be so nearely ioyned together , and also the manner how they are rightly ioyned in so firme an vnity . About the parties we are to search , 1. Who may seeke a mate for mariage . 2. What kinde of mate is to be taken . 1. All they who are able without ineuitable danger to their yoake fellow to performe the essentiall duties of mariage , may be maried . Out of this proposition arise three questions to be discussed . 1. Who are to be accounted able ? 2. What danger is ineuitable ? 3. Whether mariage be free for all but such ? §. 2. Of ripenesse of yeares in them that are to be maried . 1. They are to be accounted able who haue * past the floure of their age , and are not by defect of nature , or any other occasion made impotent . 1. Ripenesse of yeares is absolutely necessary for consummating a iust and lawfull mariage : wherefore as God at first , made Adam of full age , so when he sought out a wife for him , he made her of full age too : he made her a woman , not a childe . Where the Apostle aduiseth parents to take care for the mariage of their children , he putteth in this prouiso , if they passe the floure of their age . Child-hood is counted the floure of age . While the floure of the plant sprouteth , the seed is greene , vnfit to be sowen . Quest . How long lasteth the floure of age ? Answ . a The ciuill law , and common law also , set downe twelue yeares for the floure of a females age , and foureteene , of a males ; which is the least : for before those yeares they can haue no need of mariage , nor yet are well fit for mariage , so as if they forbeare some yeares longer , it will be much better for the parties themselues that marie , * for the children which they bring forth , for the family whereof they are the head , and for the common wealth whereof they are members . Note the ages of the Kings of Israel and Iudah when they were first maried , and we shall finde few of them to be vnder twenty , and those few , not aboue one or two yeares vnder : and yet of all sorts of people the Kings did vse to marie the soonest , that so they might haue heires betimes . Obiect . b Salomon was but a childe when he came to the crowne , and yet c he had then a childe of a yeare old at least . Answ . He was said to be a childe not simply , but comparatiuely , d in relation to his other brothers which were elder then he , & e in regard of that great worke he was to vndertake . In the time of his reign he is saidto be f old : which could not be if he had beene in yeares a childe when he began to reigne : for he reigned but fortie yeares . 2. Obiect . Ahaz was but twentie yeare old when he began to reigne , and reigned but sixteene yeares , and yet when he died Hezekiah his sonne was fiue and twentie yeare old , by which computation Ahaz had a childe when he was but eleuen , or twelue yeare old at most . 1. Answ . Some say that this was extraordinary , and render this reason , Ahaz so young a father as Elizabet an old mother , should haue hoped in Emmanuel of a virgin . 2. Answ . The beginning of that reigne when Ahaz was but twentie yeare old , is to be referred to Iotham his father ; for Ahaz was twentie yeare old when he ( namely Iotham ) began to reigne : as m Iehoiachin was eight yeare old , when he ( namely his father Iehoiachim ) began to reigne : for Iehoiachin was n eighteene , when he himselfe began to reigne . Obiect . Iotham was but o twentie and fiue yeare old when he began to reigne , how then could Ahaz his sonne at that time be twentie ? Answ . Iotham was fiue and twentie yeare old when his father Vzziah was strucke with leprosie , from which time he reigned as King euen in his fathers life time . But after his father was dead , the kingdome was established to him alone after a more solemne manner ; in which respect it is said that then he began to reigne : and then was his sonne Ahaz twentie yeare old , Iotham himselfe being about fortie . Contrarie to the forenamed fitnesse of age is the practise of such parents , or other friends of children , as make matches for them in their child-hood , and moue them to consent , and so cause them to be maried : such mariages are mock-mariages , and meere nullities . For children cannot know what appertaineth to mariage , much lesse can they performe that which is required of maried persons : their consent therefore is iustly accounted no consent , vnlesse they doe ratifie it after they come to yeares . §. 3. Of impotent persons that ought not to seeke after mariage . 2. They are to be accounted impotent , and in that respect vnable to performe the essentiall duties of mariage , who ( to vse the Scripture phrase ) were borne Eunuchs from their mothers wombe : or by any accidentall occasion are so made : as they who are defectiue , or closed in their secret parts : or taken with an incurable palsie : or possessed with frigidity , or any other such like impediment . These ought not to seeke after mariage : for by those signes of impotencie God sheweth that he calleth them to liue single . Contrarie to this manifestation of Gods will doe they sinne , who conceale their impotencie and ioyne themselues in marriage , whereby they frustrate one maine end of mariage , which is procreation of children ; and doe that wrong to the partie whom they marie , as sufficient satisfaction can neuer be made . §. 4. Of barrennesse , that it hindereth not mariage . Quest . Are such as are barren to be ranked among those impotent persons ? Answ . No , there is great difference betwixt impotencie and barrennesse . 1. Impotencie may by outward sensible signes be knowne and discerned , barrennesse cannot : it is not discerned but by want of child-bearing . 2. Impotent persons cannot yeeld due beneuolence : but such as are barren may . 3. Impotencie is incurable : but barrennesse is not simply so . Many after they haue beene a long while barren haue become fruitfull : and that not only by an extraordinary worke of God aboue the course of nature ( as b Sarah and c Elizabeth , with whom by reason of age it ceased to be after the manner of women ) but also by such a blessing as might stand with the course of nature , being obtained by praier ( as d Rebeckah and e Annah ) whereof daily experience giueth good euidence : for many after 10 , 15 , 20 , and more yeares barrennesse haue brought forth children . On these grounds many Saints , who haue beene barren , haue maried , and their practise therein not disallowed , nor their mariage dissolued . f For though procreation of children be one end of mariage , yet is it not the only end : and so inuiolable is the mariage bond , that though it be made for childrens sake , yet for want of children it may not be broken . §. 5. Of that ineuitable danger which hindereth mariage . 3. They who are infected with such contagious diseases , as diffuse themselues into those who haue societie with them , and infect them also , ought not to seeke after mariage : for that cannot but turne to the danger of the partie with whom they marie . It was for mutuall good one of another that God ordained the law of mariage ; to vse it to the hurt and danger of one another , is against the maine end of the first institution . The law of shutting vp a leper from all societie with men proueth as much ; for if lepers might not haue mutuall society with any man , much lesse might they haue matrimoniall societie with a wife or an husband . By contagious diseases not only both the parties which company together will be infected , but also their issue : whereby their disease which otherwise might die with themselues , is propagated to their posterity . A like restraint may be applied to such foule and loathsome diseases , as make the company and society of that person , who is infected therewith , irkcsome , and odious to their companion . Contrarie to the end and vse of mariage doe they sinne , who conceale such diseases , and so ioyne themselues in mariage , to the vnanswerable preiudice of the partie whom they marrie . §. 6. Of the lawfulnesse of mariage to all sorts of persons . Where there is no such iust impediment as hath beene before mentioned , it is lawfull for all sorts of people of what calling or condition soeuer to marrie . For Mariage is honourable in all , or among all , namely in , or among all sorts of people : whereupon it is accounted a Doctrine of deuils to forbid to marrie . For it is a Doctrine contrarie to Gods word , and a Doctrine that causeth much inward burning , and outward pollution , and so maketh their bodies , which should be temples of the holy Ghost , to be sties of the deuils . The disease , for the redressing whereof mariage is sanctified , is a common disease which hath infected all sorts of people : why then shall not the remedy be as common ? In this case the Apostle saith indefinitly of all , without exception of any , to auoid fornication let euery man haue his owne wife , and let euerie woman haue her owne husband . And againe , If they cannot containe let them marie : for it is better to marie then to burne . Obiect . a There be Eunuchs which haue made themselues Eunuchs ( that is , haue abstained from mariage and liued in a single life continently ) for the kingdome of heauens sake . Answ . That is spoken of some particular persons to whom the gift of continency was giuen : not of any distinct conditions , and callings , as if all and euerie one of this or that calling had so done or were able so to doe : whereupon Christ addeth this clause , He that is able to receiue it , let him receiue it , and the Apostle to the same purpose saith , b euery one hath his proper gift of God. Contrarie to this necessarie and warrantable libertie , is the impure and tyrannicall restraint of the Church of Rome , whereby all that enter into any of their holy orders , are kept from mariage . Doe they not herein c tempt God by putting a yoke vpon mens necks , which neither our fathers nor we are able to beare ? d No such restraint was euer enioyned by Gods word to any of those holy functions which he ordained : for vnder the Law it was lawfull for high Priests , ordinarie Priests , all sorts of Leuites , and extraordinarie Prophets , to marie : and vnder the Gospell , for e Apostles , Bishops , Deacons , and all Ministers of the word . * Fearefull haue beene the effects of this Diabolicall doctrine : as fornication , adulterie , incest , Sodomie , buggerie , and what not ? Many wiues put from their husbands , because their husbands were Ministers , and many Ministers put from their calling because they had wiues : many children by this meanes basely borne , and among them many in their infancie cruelly murthered . f Six thousand heads of infants were found in the ponds of a religious house . How many more thousands haue beene from time to time cast into other ponds , or buried in gardens , or other places , or other wayes conueyed out of sight ? Deuillish must that doctrine needs be , which hath such deuillish effects . g Well did he wish , that wished that all they who cannot containe , would take heed how they doe rashly professe perfection , and vow virginitie . §. 7. Of the things which are absolutely necessarie to make a person fit for mariage . They who haue power to marie must be carefull in chusing an helpe meet for them : for a this was Gods care when first he instituted mariage . To make an helpe meet for mariage , some things are absolutely necessary for the very essence or being of mariage ; others , necessarie for the comfort and happinesse of mariage . In regard of the former sort , there must be chosen , 1. One of the same kinde or nature : for among all the creatures which were made , b there was not found an helpe meet for man : therefore God out of his bone and flesh made a woman of his owne nature and kinde . Contrarie to this is the detestable sinne of buggerie with beasts , expresly forbidden by the * law . A sinne more then beastly : for the bruit beasts content themselues with their owne kinde : Monstrous it is in the kinde thereof : and a cause of abominable monsters . c Contrary also is that copulation which witches haue with deuils : then which none more vnnaturall , none more prodigious and odious . 2. One of the contrarie sex : the male must choose a female : the female a male . Thus God hauing made Adam a male , made Eue a female , and ioyned them in mariage . A coniunction of these different sexes is only fit for increase of mankinde , and other mariage duties . Contrarie are those vnnaturall commixtions of parties of the same sex : which the Apostlereckoneth vp as iudgements inflicted on the heathen , because they changed the truth of God into a lie , and worshipped , and serued the creature more then the Creator . 3. One beyond those degrees of consanguinitie and affinitie which 3 are forbidden by the law of God : these degrees are expressed by Moses Leuit. 18. 6 , 7 , &c. and explained in a table of the degrees of consanguinitie and affinitie within which none may mary , appointed to be hung vp in euery Church . Contrary is incest , a sinne not only forbidden by Gods word , but so horrible euen to the heathen as ( to vse the Apostles words , 1 Cor. 5. 1. ) it is not so much as named among the Gentiles . Excellently is that censure verified by the heathen Orators patheticall exclamation against one Sassia who maried her sonne in law , in these words : O incredible wickednesse of a woman , not heard of in any age but this ! O vnbridled and vntamed lust ! O singular boldnesse ! Not to feare the power of God , and fame of men ! &c. Lust , impudencie , madnesse , ouercame shame , feare , and reason . What may we now thinke of the dispensations which the Pope giueth for incestuous mariages , allowed vnto great Princes euen by the * Tridentine councell ? doth he not herein shew himselfe to be that man of sinne , who opposeth and exalteth himselfe aboue all that is called God ? 4. One that is free : nor maried , nor betrothed to another : the law of mariage noteth thus much in this clause , a They two shall be one flesh . And in that b the law inflicteth the same punishment vpon the person which being betrothed committeth vncleannesse , that it doth vpon a maried person , it is euident that it is vnlawfull to marie one betrothed to another , as well as one maried to another . So firme is a contract , as the law calleth a betrothed maid , a wife : and a betrothed maid might not be put away without a bill of diuorce . Contrary is Bigamy , and Polygamy , whereof c before : vnto which head may be referred mariages with such as haue beene espoused to others before . These are vtterly vnlawfull . §. 8. Of the lawfulnesse of other mariages after one of the maried couple is dead . 1. Quest . Are they who haue buried their husband or wife so free , as they may marie againe ? Answ . Yea , as free as they who were neuer before maried . The law doth not only permit a widow to marie againe : but if her husband died before he had any children , it commanded the next kinsman that was liuing and free to marie her , that he might raise vp seed to his brother deceased : which if he refused to doe , a penalty of ignominy was inflicted on him : the widow reiected was to loose his shooe from his foot , and to spit in his face in the presence of the Elders . The Apostle expresly saith that a woman , when her husband is dead , is at liberty to be maried ( 1. Cor. 7. 39. ) yea speaking of young widowes he further saith , I will that they marie ( 1. Tim. 5. 14. ) This libertie which the Prophet of God , and Apostle of Christ grant to a wife , can by no shew of reason be denied to an husband : for the bond of mariage giueth them a like power ouer one anothers body , ( 1 Cor. 7. 4. ) and knitteth one as inuiolably as the other , ( Mat. 19. 6. ) Husbands therefore as well as wiues haue vsed this libertie , as Abraham ( Gen. 25. 1. ) b The Apostle that giueth this libertie , rendreth a reason thereof , taken from the limitation of that time wherein maried persons haue power one ouer another , and that is the time of this life only : For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband , so long as he liueth : but if the husband be dead she is loosed , &c. On this ground all the * reasons which warrant or moue such as neuer were maried , to mary , may be applied to them that by death haue their yoake-fellow taken from them . 2. Quest . May this libertie be extended any further then to a second mariage ? Answ . We finde no restraint from a third , or fourth , or more mariages , if by the diuine prouidence so many wiues , or husbands one after another be taken away while there is need for the suruiuing partie to vse the benefit of mariage . The woman of Samaria that had fiue husbands one after another , is not blamed for being maried to so many , but for liuing with one ( after the other were dead ) that was not her husband , ( Ioh. 4. 18 Neither did the Lord condemne that woman which was said to haue seuen husbands one after another , ( Mat. 22. 25 , &c. ) Contrarie is the opinion of a Montanists , and Cataphryges , ancient heretiques that accounted those mariages which the suruiuor made after the death of a yoke-fellow , to be adulterous : with which heresie b Tertullian an ancient and learned father was so farre infected , as he wrote a treatise in defence thereof . It seemeth by their arguments that one maine ground of their error was a misinterpretation of those Scriptures which forbid men to haue two wiues at once , and women to haue two husbands at once , as , Two shall be one flesh , Gen. 2. 24. A Bishop and a Deacon must be the husband of one wife , 1 Tim. 2. 2 , 10. Let a widow be taken that hath beene the wife of one husband , 1 Tim. 5. 9. These are indeed expresse texts against such Digamists , and Polygamists as haue beene described * before : but they make no more against second or other after-mariages one mate being dead , then against first mariages . Into the roll of these heretiques may they be put , who denie such after mariages to any kinde of Ministers . So doe our aduersaries : they exclude such as are maried againe after one wife is dead from such functions of inferiour orders , as they admit those who are but once maried vnto . They alleage many of those Scriptures which Montanists doe ( as 1 Tim. 2. 2 , 10. and 5. 9 ) which sheweth that they are infected with the same heresie , though they pretend to renounce it . §. 9. Of equalitie in yeeres betwixt husband and wife . That matrimoniall societie may proue comfortable , it is requisite that there should be some equalitie betwixt the parties that are maried in Age , Estate , Condition , Pietie . 1. For Age , as the partie that seeketh a mate must be of ripe yeeres , fit to giue consent , and able to performe mariage duties , so the mate which is taken must be somewhat answerable in age : if one young , both young : if one of middle age , both so : if one growne to yeeres , the other also . It is noted of Zacharie and Elizabeth , that both were well striken in yeeres . If both were old together , then both also were young together . Equalitie in yeeres maketh maried persons more fit for procreation of children , for a mutuall performance of mariage duties each to other , and for making their companie and societie euery way more happie . This equalitie is not ouer strictly to be taken , as if the maried couple were to be iust of the same age , but only for some answerablenesse in yeeres : which may be though there be a disparitie of fiue or ten , or somewhat more yeeres : especially if the excesse of yeeres be on the husbands part : for besides that according to the ordinarie course of nature a mans strength and vigour lasteth longer then a womans , it is very meet that the husband should be some what elder then his wife , because he is an head , a gouernour , a protector of his wife . The Scripture noteth many husbands to be elder then their wiues ( as Abraham was tenne yeeres elder then Sarah ; and if we narrowly marke the circumstances of the histories of Isaac and Iacob , and their wiues , we shall finde that the husbands were elder then their wiues ) To my remembrance an approued example of an husband younger then his wife cannot be giuen out of Scripture . Contrary to this equalitie in yeeres , is the practise of many men and women , who being aged , to satisfie their lust , or for some other by-respect , mary such as are but in the floure of their age , wherein they doe many times much faile of their expectation : for those young ones finding the societie of aged folkes to be burdensome , and irksome vnto them , soone begin to loath the same , and thereby cause more griefe and vexation , then euer they did giue comfort and contentment . On the other side , others there be who in the prime and strength of their age , for wealth , honour , or such like respects , mary those that with age begin to be decrepit , and vnfit to be maried , hoping that they will not long liue , but that with a little trouble they shall purchase much dignitie or riches , & after a while be free againe . But God oft meeteth with such in their kinde , by prolonging the life of those aged persons , and so making the burden to be much more grieuous and tedious then was imagined , and by taking away those young ones sooner then they looked for , whereby it commeth to passe that all their hopes perish . * The heathen obserued inequalitie in yeeres to be occasions of many mischiefes , and thereupon prescribed rules against it . §. 10. Of equalitie in estat● and condition betwixt those that are to be maried together . 2. Some equalitie in outward estate and wealth is also befitting 2 the parties that are to be maried together , lest the disparitie therein ( especially if it be ouer-great ) make the one ●nsult ouer the other more then is meet : for if a man of great wealth be maried to a poore woman , he will thinke to make her as his maid-seruant , and expect that she should carrie her selfe towards him so as beseemeth not a yoake-fellow , and a bedfellow : so as such an one may rather be said to be brought vnto bondage , then mariage . And if a rich woman mary a poore man , she will looke to be the master , and to rule him : so as the order which God hath established will be cleane peruerted : and the honour of mariage laid in the dust . For where no order is , there can be no honour . 3. The like may be said of outward condition , that therein 3 also there be some equalitie : that Princes , Nobles , and Gentlemen , mary such as are of their owne ranke : and the meaner sort such as are of their degree . Note what sort of wiues Abraham , Isaac , and Iaacob maried , and it will appeare that they had respect to this paritie . Disparitie in condition as well as in estate , is a meanes to make men and women swell and insult aboue that which is meet : yea and to twit one another in the teeth with their former estate and condition . Contrary on the one side are the practises of such as affect to mary aboue their owne estate and degree : thinking by such mariages to aduance themselues . This is the only thing which many seeke after in seeking wiues and husbands ; whereby it commeth to passe that they oft meet with the worst matches , and make their mariage a kinde of bondage vnto them . Great portions make many women proud , daintie , lauish , idle , and carelesse ; a man were much better , euen for helpe of his outward estate , to mary a prudent , sober , thriftie , carefull , diligent wife , though with a small portion , then such an one . A proud backe , a daintie tooth , and a lauish hand will soone consume a great portion ; but a wise woman buildeth her house : and a vertuous woman is a crowne to her husband . Many wiues also that are maried to very rich husbands , are more stinted and pinched in their allowance , then such as are maried to men of meaner estate . It is not the meanes which a man hath , but his minde and disposition that maketh him free and bountifull to his wife . Contrarie are the mariages which men of great authoritie and abilitie make with meane women , yea their owne maids many times , and those of the lowest ranke , their kitchinmaids . parties part that is to be maried : and then if that partie be vnder the gouernment of parents , the matter must be moued to them , before there be any further proceeding therein , as Sampson who seeing and liking a daughter of the Philistims , told his father and his mother thereof . Yea though the partie be not vnder the gouernment of any , yet it is very meet that counsell be taken of wise and vnderstanding friends : that in a matter so weightie as mariage is , there may be the aduice of more heads then one , for the preuenting of such mischiefes as through rashnesse might fall out . After a liking is thus taken by one partie of a meet mate , that liking must be moued to the other partie so liked , to know whether there be a reciprocall affection of one towards another . Thus Sampson went and talked with that woman whom he liked to be his wife . If at first there be a good liking mutually and thorowly setled in both their hearts of one another , loue is like to continue in them for euer , as things which are well glued , and setled before they be shaken vp and downe , will neuer be seuered asunder : but if they be ioyned together without glue , or shaken while the glue is moist , they cannot remaine firme . Mutuall loue and good liking of each other is as glue . Let the parties to be maried be herein well setled before they come to meet with trials through cohabitation , and that loue will not easily be loosened by any trials . Contrarie is the adulterous and brutish practise of such as so soone as they cast their eie on any whom they like , neuer aduise or consult about a right and due proceeding vnto mariage , but instantly with all the eagernesse and speed they can , like brute beasts , seeke to haue their desire and lust satisfied . Though to keepe themselues free from the penalty of the lawes vnder which they liue , they procure meanes to be maried , yet they declare a lustfull and adulterous minde . And their practise is too like to the practise of the Beniamits , who catcht wiues from among the daughters of Shiloh as they were dancing : or else to the practise of the old world , which so grieued the Spirit of God , that it repented him that he had made man , and thereupon he was moued to bring a generall deluge on the whole world . Their practise was this , that they tooke them wiues of all that they chose : that is , they rashly and suddenly maried whomsoeuer they liked , without any consideration of their condition . §. 14. Of a contract what it is ? II. When both parties haue manifested a mutuall liking each to other , and vpon mature deliberation and good aduice doe conceiue one to be a fit match for another , it is requisite that a ioynt consent and absolute promise of marying one another before sufficient witnesses be made . This rightly made is a contract , which is the beginning of a mariage . The right making of a firme contract consisteth in two things : 1. In an actuall taking of each other for espoused man and wife . 2. In a direct promise of marying each other within a conuenient time . So as a forme of contract may be made to this purpose ; First the man taking the woman by the hand to say , I A. take thee B. to my espoused wife , and doe faithfully promise to marie thee in time meet and conuenient . And then the woman againe taking the man by the hand to say , I B. take thee A. to my espoused husband , and doe faithfully promise to yeeld to be maried to thee in time meet and conuenient . This mutuall and actuall taking of one another for espoused man and wife in the time present , and a direct promise of marying one another afterwards , setleth such a right and property of the one in the other as cannot be alienated without licence had from the great Iudge of heauen , who hath by his diuine ordinance setled that right . §. 15. Of the grounds of a contract . Quest . Is a contract absolutely necessary ? Answ . Though it haue beene an ancient custome continued in all ages , yet I dare not pronounce it to be so absolutely necessary , as the want thereof should nullifie a mariage , and make it to be no lawfull mariage . But surely it is so meet and requisite , as I would aduise all Christians that desire a blessing and good successe on their mariage to be contracted before they are maried . If there were no other ground for it but this , that God hath sanctified it , and commended it vnto vs by his word , it were enough to perswade such as feare God to vse it . For I demand , why doth God commend vnto his Church any thing by his word , but that his Church should make conscience of vsing it ? Now that by Gods word it is commended , is without contradiction most euident . For , not to insist on that argument which , not without good probability , is alleaged for the antiquity of a contract , and thus collected from Gods ordering of that first ancient mariage betwixt Adam and Euah , God brought Euah to Adam on the first day that they were created to see how he would like her , and vpon the sight of her , and notice which withall he had of her , by that wisdome which God gaue him , he then tooke her to himselfe : which taking is supposed to be but a contract , because a he did not know her till after his fall . If it be obiected that Adam and Euah are called b man and wife in the time of their innocencie . It may bee answered that those titles * are in Scripture giuen to such as are only contracted , to shew the neere and firme coniunction betwixt parties espoused . But not to insist on that which is but probable , it is more then probable that Lots daughters were contracted : for it is said that d Lot had sonnes in law which maried ( or rather should marie ) his daughters : and withall it is said that they had not knowne man : now then it must needs follow that they were called Lots sonnes in law because his daughters were espoused to them . But most euident for this purpose is that difference which the e law putteth betwixt a pure virgin , an espoused maid , and a maried wife . So as contracted persons are in a middle degree betwixt single persons , and maried persons : they are neither simply single , nor actually maried . To shew that this custome of a contract before mariage continued in Gods Church among the Saints , it is expresly noted that Marie the mother of the Lord Iesus who liued many hundred yeares after that law , was contracted . §. 16. Of the reasons which shew how requisite a contract is . Many good and weightie reasons may be alledged to shew how requisite it is that a contract should go before mariage . For 1. It addeth much to the honour of mariage , that it should be deliberatly and aduisedly step after step , by one degree after another consummated and made vp . 2. It putteth a difference betwixt such as intend mariage in the feare of the Lord , for such holy ends as are warranted in the word , and such as intend it only to satisfie their lust , or for other like carnall ends . For these can admit no delay , as was noted * before . But they that vse this solemne preparation by a contract before mariage , shew that they desire to haue all things fit for so sacred a matter duly performed ; and therefore they are content to make some stay for the better effecting thereof . 3. It is a meanes of knitting the hearts of the two parties to be maried more firmely and inuiolably together before they come to dwell together . For a contract being the beginning of a mariage , it is an euident demonstration of Gods counsell concerning the parties contracted , that God hath prepared them each for other to be man and wife : so as after the contract is made , they may simply and absolutely pray each for other , that God would blesse them one to another , to liue comfortably and happily together . Before a contract is made , they can but vpon supposition ( if God haue appointed them to be man and wife ) pray one for another . For oft it falleth out that after many great hopes and likelihoods of proceeding in such or such a match , by some occasion or other it is cleane broken off : but a lawfull contract knitteth so firme a knot as cannot be broken : so as a man may conclude that being contracted to a woman she shall be his wife : and so may a woman conclude of a man. The consideration hereof will further moue them more narrowly to obserue what good qualities , or what other things , which may make them more louely one to another , are in each other . 4. It is a meanes to make them before hand prepare themselues to perfome such mariage duties as Gods word requireth of man and wife . For a contract giueth them assurance of mariage if they liue vnto it : so as then they cannot but know that it is high time for them to thinke how they are to carrie themselues , when they come to liue in house together : and withall to consider , what crosses ordinarily doe accompanie the maried estate , that they may be before hand prepared wisely to passe them ouer , or patiently to vndergoe them . 5. It may be a meanes of discouering many hidden and close inconueniences , which otherwise would neuer come to light . For many friends fearing lest the discouering of some euils which are carried closely , should make a breach betwixt themselues and their friends , will not make them knowne till they see some vrgent necessitie to moue them so to doe . Though the euill be such , as being knowne would hinder mariage , yet till they see some sure euidence , that they shall indeed be maried ( if no iust exception be put in ) they will hope that some other occasion may fall out to hinder the mariage , and in that respect conceale their exception . But because a contract is the beginning of mariage , after they haue notice therof , they will not forbeare to disclose what they know . For this end is it , that the contract is three seuerall times openly published in the Church , that if any doe know any iust cause why such persons as are contracted may not lawfully proceed to mariage , they make knowne the same . A commendable custome : and great pitty , that it is so much neglected as it is . 6. It may preuent many plots and practises of inueigling , or stealing away maids and widowes . For it oft falleth out , that when parents or other friends haue prouided a good match for their daughter , or for some other vnder their gouernment , and all things on all parts well concluded , the wedding day appointed , and all things fitted and prepared for the solemnizing of the wedding , some desirous to forestall that mariage , by secret and cunning deuices get the bride away a few daies before , if not on the very morning of the intended wedding day , and mary her out of hand to another . That which maketh men so bold is , that they know a clandestine mariage being consummate shall stand firme in law . But a legall contract preuenteth such mischiefes , because it maketh such a furtiue mariage vtterly void . None therfore knowing that a contract is lawfully made before hand , will be so bold , or rather so mad , as to offer to frustrate a mariage after any such manner . 7. It is a meanes to stirre vp the parties which are to be maried , more carefully and diligently to prouide all things fit for their dwelling together , and well ordering their houshold before hand ; that they be not to seeke for necessaries when they should vse them . For being contracted , they know that it cannot be long ere they must come to dwell together . §. 17. Of abusing , or neglecting a contract . There are two extremes contrarie to the forenamed doctrine of a contract . One of attributing too much to it : another of derogating too much from it . Many make it a very mariage , and thereupon haue a greater solemnitie at their contract , then at their mariage : yea many take libertie after a contract to know their spouse , as if they were maried : an unwarrantable and dishonest practise . Lots daughters were * contracted to husbands , and yet they are said to haue knowne no man. The law stileth her that is contracted a a maid , to shew that she ought to keepe her selfe a virgin till the mariage be consummate . Therefore Mary is thus described , b a virgin espoused . But it is the common course of most to make light account of this warrantable and honourable proceeding to mariage by a contract . Few there be in comparison of the multitudes that are maried , who make any conscience thereof . They thinke it needlesse , and vtterly neglect it . No maruell that they meet with many mischiefes and inconueniences , when the meanes of preuenting the same are not vsed . Let such duly weight the reasons rendred in the former section . §. 18. Of the distance of time betwixt the contract and mariage . Quest. What distance of time must passe betwixt the making of a contract , and consummating of mariage ? Answ . This must be left to the wise consideration of the parties contracted , and of their friends , for the same time cannot precisely be prescribed to all . Occasions may fall out either of hastening , or putting off the mariage . Only extremes on both sides must be auoided . Neither ought the mariage be too suddenly solemnized vpon the contract : ( then the ends and reasons of a contract , before mentioned , are made void ) nor yet too long put off ( then may Satan take occasion to tempt them for their incontinencie . ) The laudable custome of our and other Churches sheweth , that at least three weekes must passe betwixt contract and mariage . For the contract is to be three times published , and that but once a weeke before the wedding be celebrated . And we read that the virgin Mary was at least three moneths contracted before Ioseph tooke her to wife . For when the Angell first came to her she was espoused : after that she went to her cosen Elizabeth , with whom she abode three moneths : and then being returned home Ioseph was warned by an Angell to take her to wife . I note not this as a rule for euery one precisely to follow . For the virgin Mary had a iust occasion to tarrie three moneths with her old cosen Elizabeth : and so may others haue occasions to put off their mariages : which may be lawfull , so the mariage be not put off too long , and that there be a mutuall and ioynt consent of both parties . For after the contract is made , neither the man nor the woman haue the power of their owne body . Contrary is that vnwarrantable course which many take , to be affianced and made sure to a wife , and then to trauell beyond sea , or to any other place , and be absent from their spouse a yeere , or two , or three , or it may be more yeeres . If a man might not goe to warre , nor be charged with any businesse that should draw him from his wife the first yeere of his mariage , much lesse may he absent himselfe for any long time after he is contracted but not maried . This may be a meanes to alienate the heart of his spouse from him for euer . §. 19. Of a religious consecrating of mariage . III. The last degree of consummating a mariage , is the open and publike solemnization thereof : which consisteth 1. In a religious consecration thereof . 2. In a ciuill celebration   A religious consecration of mariage is performed by the blessing of a publike Minister of the word in the open face of the Church in the day time . This of old hath beene vsed of Christians , and still is continued among vs. Though we haue neither expresse precept , nor particular patterne in Gods word for this manner of solemnizing a mariage ( for there is no particular forme thereof set downe in the Scripture ) yet it being agreeable to the generall rules thereof , we ought in conscience to subiect our selues thereto . The generall rules are these , Let all things be done decently , and in order . The Churches of God haue such a custome . Submit your selues to euery ordinance of man for the Lords sake , with the like . But the foresaid manner of consecrating mariage , is very decent and in good order , a laudable custome of the Churches , and an ordinance of those gouernours vnder whom we liue . Therefore warrantable , and to be obserued . Neither is this order , custome , and ordinance appointed without iust and weightie reasons . For 1. Mariage is a kind of publike action : the well or ill ordering therof much tendeth to the good or hurt of family , Church , and common-wealth . For by mariage families are erected , and Church and common-wealth increased and continued . 2. d Mariage is honourable . e The most sacred and inuiolable bond that knitteth any two persons together . 3. Mariage is f Gods couenant , wherein he himselfe hath a maine and principall stroke . For God is the chiefest agent in ioyning man and woman in mariage . On these grounds it hath beene thought very requisite that mariage should be solemnized in the day time ( as a worke of light that need not be couertly and closely done ) and that in a publike place , whether any , that will , may haue free accesse , either to except against it , and hinder it ( if there be iust cause ) or to be a witnesse thereof , and to adde his blessing thereto . And among publike places the Church is thought the fittest , because it is the house of praier , where persons and actions are most solemnly blessed . And of all persons a publike Minister is thought to be the meetest to celebrate mariage , and to ioyne the parties to be maried , together , because he stands in Gods roome , and in and by his ministerie God ioyneth them together , and blesseth them : so as after the minister hath rightly ioyned man and wife together in matrimony , it may be well said , Those whom God hath ioyned together , let no man put asunder . The forme of consecrating mariage , which is prescribed in our liturgie or common-prayer-booke , doth so distinctly , perspicuously , and fully set downe whatsoeuer is to be obserued and done by the parties to be maried , their parents , or other gouernours , and the Minister that ioyneth them together , that I can adde nothing thereunto . There are declared the grounds , ends , and vses of mariage . There open proclamation is made whether any can except against the intended mariage . There each partie is solemnly charged , that if either of them doe know any impediment , why they may not lawfully be maried , to disclose it . There also each partie is openly demanded if freely and willingly they will take one another for man and wife . There the duties of maried persons are declared , and they seuerally asked whether they will subiect themselues thereto or no. All which being openly professed , the parent or some in his stead is called forth to giue the Bride to the Bridegroome . Then they two actually taking each other to be man and wife , and testifying the same by expresse words , and by mutuall pledges , the Minister in Gods name ioyneth them together , pronounceth them to be lawfull husband and wife , and by prayer craueth Gods blessing vpon the action , and vpon their persons . Thus is the mariage consecrated , and they two made one flesh , that is , lawfully ioyned together by the inuiolable bond of mariage . §. 20. Of clandestine mariages . Contrary are clandestine mariages , such as are made in priuate houses , or other secret places , or in Churches without a sufficient number of witnesses , or in the night time , or without a lawfull Minister of the word , with the like . As such seeking of secrecie taketh much from the honour and dignitie of mariage , so it implieth some euill cleauing thereto : For euery man that euill doth hateth the light . There is little hope that such mariages should haue any good successe . For where such meanes as are sanctified for obtaining a blessing on mariage are neglected , what blessing can thereupon be expected ? §. 21. Of a ciuill celebrating of mariage . Though vpon the forenamed consecrating of mariage it be in regard of the substance thereof fully consummate , yet for the greater solemnity of so honourable a thing , it is very requisite that further there be added a ciuill celebration of it : vnder which I comprise all those lawfull customes that are vsed for the setting forth of the outward solemnitie thereof , as meeting of friends , accompanying the Bridegroome and Bride both to and from the Church , putting on best apparell , feasting , with other tokens of reioycing : for which we haue expresse warrant out of Gods word . For the generall , that the mariage time is a time of reioycing , some gather from the notation of the word , as if it were stiled mariage of merry age . But to let that passe , The Scripture vseth to set forth a time of reioycing by the a ioy of the Bridegroome ouer his Bride , and stileth b the voice of a Bridegroome and a Bride , the voice of ioy and gladnesse . And on the contrary counteth it a iudgement , when c ioy is taken away from the Bridegroome and the Bride . For meeting of friends at the time of mariage , it is noted that d Laban gathered together all the men of the place , when his daughter was maried . And when Sampson was maried , e they brought thirtie companions to him . And when a friend of the virgin Marie was maried , f Iesus and his Disciples , besides many other , were inuited thereto . And in the parable of the mariage of the Kings sonne , it is noted that g many guests were bidden to the wedding . In all which histories it is further noted , that feasts were made at the solemnizing of those mariages . And the phrases which the Prophet vseth of h a Bridegroomes decking himselfe with ornaments , and a Brides adorning her selfe with Iewels , giue warrant for putting on the best apparell at that time . Here by the way let good heed be taken , that the things which may lawfully be vsed , be not vnlawfully abused , as commonly mariage-festiuities , and that especially in feastings , are . §. 22. Of ill or well ordering mariage feasts . Mariage feasts are abused , 1. When they are made at an vnseasonable time : as on the Lords day , or in a time of mourning . 2. When they exceed the abilitie of him that maketh the feasts . 3. When the abundance prepared , is immoderatly taken , euen to gluttony and drunkennesse . The lewd practise of drinking healths to the Bridegroome and Bride , oft causeth much excesse in drunkennesse . 4. When too much time is spent therein . 5. When God is cleane forgotten therein , and the companie poysoned with corrupt communication , vnchaste songs , and the like . 6. When the needy and distressed are not remembred therein . For preuenting of these abuses , a seasonable time for celebrating mariage must be chosen out : and moderation vsed both by him that maketh the feast , and also by them that partake thereof : moderation I say in the measure of eating and drinking , and in the time spent therein : which time must be sanctified with such communication as is good to the vse of edifying , that it may minister grace vnto the hearers . And for the more cheerefulnesse therein , witty questions and doubtfull riddles may be propounded ( as Sampson did ) to exercise the wit and iudgement of the guests : there may be also singing Psalmes and hymnes and spirituall songs , making melodie in their hearts to the Lord. Yea further , that the mariage meeting , mirth , and feasting may be the better sanctified , good choice is to be made of the guests that are inuited thereto . Hereof we haue a worthy patterne in those who were maried in Cana of Galile , ●nd inuited to their feast Iesus , his mother , and his Disciples . Such as Iesus , will minister occasion of sauourie and sanctified communication , whereby all the guests may be much edified . ●uch as the virgin Mary will be a good example of modesty , ●brietie , and other like Christian graces . Such as the Disciples , will be farre from scorning and deriding wholsome and ●ood instructions , but rather giue all diligent heed thereunto , ●●d lay them vp in their hearts . Aboue all , that the mirth and ioy of mariage be not dampt , as Belshazzars was , let them that are maried , and all that come to reioyce with them , be sure that they haue true assurance of their spirituall mariage with Christ , and of a good right in him to the creatures which they vse . Otherwise their sinnes will be as that hand-writing which appeared to Belshazzar on the wall . Finally , in regard of that libertie which God giueth with plentie and abundance to eat of the fat , and drinke of the sweet , let the poore that scarce haue sufficiencie be remembred . Thus by a right celebrating of mariage , is it much honoured : and man and wife with much honour are brought together . §. 23. Of the honour of mariage in regard of the first institution thereof . Great reason there is why mariage should with such honour be solemnized . For it is a most honourable thing . Honourable in the institution , ends , priuiledges , and mysterie thereof . No ordinance was more honourable in the first institution thereof , as is euident by the Author thereof , the Place where it was instituted , the Time when it was instituted , the Persons who were first maried , and the Manner of ioyning them together . 1. The Author and first Institutor of mariage was the Lord God. Could there haue beene a greater , or any way a more excellent Author ? 2. The Place was Paradise ; the most faire , glorious , pleasant , honourable , commodious , and euery way most excellent place that euer was in this world , Place , though it be but a circumstance , addeth much to the honour of a thing . Solemat ordinances are made in honourable places . Thus with vs mariages are solemnized in Churches , not in priuate houses . 3. The Time was the most pure and perfect time that euer was in the world , when no sinne or pollution of man had stained it , euen the time of mans innocencie . Puritie addeth much to the honour of a thing . 4. The Persons were the most honourable that euer were euen the first father and mother of all mankinde , they who had an absolute power and dominion ouer all creatures , and to whom all were subiect . None but they euer had a true monarchy ouer the whole world . 5. The Manner was with as great deliberation as euer was vsed in instituting any ordinance . For first the three glorious persons in the Trinity doe meet to aduise about it . For The Lord God said , and to whom should he speake ? not to any created power , but to him that was begotten of himselfe , that Wonderfull , Counseller , &c. In this consultation this ordinance is found to be very needfull : ( It is not good for man to be alone ) thereupon a determination is set downe , to make an helpe meet for man. For the better effecting hereof the Lord proceedeth thereto very deliberatly , by sundry steps , and degrees . 1. All the creatures that liued on the earth , or breathed in the aire , are brought before man , to see if an helpe meet for him might be found among them . 2. Euery of them being thorowly viewed , and found vnfit , another creature is made and that out of mans substance and side , and after his image . 3. This excellent creature thus made is by the maker therof presented to man , to see how he would like it . 4. Man manifesting a good liking to her , she is giuen to him to be his wife . 5. The inuiolable law of the neere and firme vnion of man and wife together is enacted . Let all the forenamed branches concerning the first institution of mariage expresly recorded by the holy Ghost be well weighed , and we shall easily see that there is no ordinance now in force among the sonnes of men so honourable in the institution thereof , as this . §. 24. Of the Ends of Mariage . 2. The Ends for which mariage was ordained adde much to the honour thereof . They are especially three . 1. That the world might be increased : and not simply increased , but with a legitimate brood , and distinct families , which are the seminaries of cities and common-wealths . Yea also that in the world the Church by an holy seed might be preserued , and propagated , Mal. 2. 15. 2. That men might auoid fornication ( 1 Cor. 7. 2. ) and possesse their vessels in holinesse and honour . In regard of that pronenesse which is in mans corrupt nature to lust , this end addeth much to the honour of mariage . It sheweth that mariage is as an hauen to such as are in ieopardy of their saluation through the gusts of temptations to lust . No sinne is more hereditary ; none whereof more children of Adam doe partake , then this . Well might Christ say ( Mat. 19. 11 ) all men receiue not this saying . Of all the children of Adam that euer were , not one to a million of those that haue come to ripenesse of yeares haue beene true Eunuches all their life time . Against this hereditary disease no remedie is so soueraigne as this . Yea for those that haue not the gift of continency this is the only warranted , and sanctified remedy . 3. That man and wife might be a mutuall helpe one to another , ( Gen. 2. 18. ) An helpe as for bringing forth , so for bringing vp children ; and as for erecting , so for well gouerning their family . An helpe also for well ordering prosperity , and well bearing aduersity . An helpe in health and sicknesse . An helpe while both liue together , and when one is by death taken from the other . In this respect it is said ( Pro. 18. 22. ) who so findeth a wife , findeth a good thing , which by the rule of relation is true also , of an husband . No such helpe can man haue from any other creature as from a wife ; or a woman as from an husband . §. 25. Of the Priuileges of mariage . III. If ( * as once of circumcision ) it be demanded what is the priuilege , aduantage , and profit of mariage , I answer , Much euery way . 1. By it men and women are made Husbands and Wiues . 2. It is the only lawfull meanes to make them Fathers and Mothers . 3. It is the ordinarie meanes to make them Masters and Mistresses . All these are great dignities , wherein the image and glorie of God consisteth . 4. It is the most effectuall meanes of continuing a mans name and memory in this world , that can be . Children are liuing monuments , and liuely representations of their parents . 5. Many priuileges haue of old beene granted to such as were maried . y In pleading causes , or giuing sentence , they had the first place ; and in choice of offices they were preferred . z In meetings they had the vpper hand . * And if they had many children they were exempted from watchings , and other like burthensome functions . Among vs , if the younger sister be maried before the elder , the preheminency and precedency ●s giuen to the younger . The priuileges and honours which are giuen to maried persons , were questionlesse the ground of that custome which Laban mentioneth of his country ; that the younger was not to be maried before the elder . §. 26. Of the mysterie of Mariage . IIII. Great is that mysterie which is set forth by mariage , namely the sacred , spirituall , reall , and inuiolable vnion betwixt Christ and his Church : which is excellently deciphe●ed in Salomons Song , and in Psal . 45. and expresly noted , Eph. 5. 32. Hereby man and wife who intirely , as they ought , loue one another , haue an euident demonstration of Christs loue to them . For as parents by that affection which they beare to their children , may better discerne the minde , and meaning of God towards them , then such as neuer had childe , so may maried persons better know the disposition of Iesus Christ , who is the spouse of euery faithfull soule , then single persons . §. 27. Of Mariage and single life compared together . Let now the admirers and praisers of a single estate bring forth all their reasons , and put them in the other scole against mariage . If these two be duly poised , and rightly weyed , we shall finde single life too light to be compared with honest mariage . All that can be said for the single estate , is grounded vpon accidentall occasions . Saint Paul , who of all the pen-men of holy Scripture hath spoken most for it , draweth all his commendations to the head of Expediency , and restraineth all vnto a present necessity . Obiect . He vseth these words ( b good , and c better . ) Answ . Those words haue relation not to vertue , but to expediencie : neither are they spoken in opposition to vice and sinne , for then would it follow , that to marie ( which is Gods ordinance , and honourable in all ) were euill and sinfull : which is to reuiue d that ancient heresie , that mariage is of the deuill . e Of old they who haue called lawfull mariage a defilement , haue beene said to haue the Apostate dragon dwelling in them . But the Apostle stileth that good , which is commodious , and that better which is more expedient : and yet not simply more expedient , but to some persons at some times . For if any haue not the gift of continency , it is not only commodious or more expedient that they marie , but also absolutely necessarie . They are commanded so to doe ( 1 Cor. 7. 9. ) Yet on the other side , if any haue the gift of continency , they are not simply bound from mariage ; there be other occasions , beside auoiding fornication , to moue them to marie . It is therefore truly said that Virginity is not commanded , but aduised vnto . We haue no precept for it , but leaue it to the power of them that haue that power . So farre forth as men and women see iust occasion of abstaining from mariage ( being at least able so to doe ) they are by the Apostle perswaded to vse their liberty and keepe themselues free . But all the occasions which moue them to remaine single arise from the weaknesse and wickednesse of men . Their wickednesse who raise troubles against others , their weaknesse who suffer themselues to be disquieted and too much distracted with affaires of the family , care for wife , children , and the like . Were it not for the wickednesse of some , and weaknesse of others , to please an husband or a wife , would be no hiderance to pleasing of the Lord. If therefore man had stood in his intire and innocent estate , no such wickednesse or weaknesse had seized vpon him : and then in no respect could the single estate haue beene preferred before the maried . But since the fall , Virginity ( where it is giuen ) may be of good vse : and therefore the Church doth giue due honour both to virginity and mariage . §. 28. Of celebrating mariage with sorrow . Contrary to the forenamed ioyfull celebrating of mariage are all those indirect courses which bring much griefe , trouble and vexation thereunto : as forced , stolne , vnequall , or any other way vnlawfull mariages : mariages without parents , or other gouernours and friends consent : or hudled vp to auoid the danger of law for former vncleannesse committed , with the like . Many by their preposterous and vndue performing of so weightie a matter , doe not only cause great trouble and disquietnesse on the mariage day , but also much sorrow all the daies of their life . If such finde no ioy , comfort or helpe in mariage , but rather the contrary , let them not blame Gods ordinance , but their owne folly and peruersnesse . The second Treatise . PART . II. Of common-mutuall duties betwixt Man and Wife . §. 1. Of the heads of those common-mutuall duties . IN the first part of this Treatise concerning Man and Wife , hath beene declared , who are so to be accounted : in this second part their common-mutuall duties are to be laid forth . These are either x absolutely necessary for the being and abiding of mariage : or y needfull and requisite for the well being and well abiding of it , that is , for the good estate of mariage , and for a commendable , and comfortable liuing together . There are two kindes of the former , 1. Matrimoniall Vnity . 2. Matrimoniall Chastity .   The latter also may be drawne to two heads : for they are either such as the maried couple are mutually to performe each to other : or such as both of them are ioyntly to performe to others . Those mutuall duties are 1. A louing affection of one to another . 2. A prouident care of one for another .   Vnder that prouident care I comprise both the Meanes whereby it may be the better effected ( which is Cohabitation ) and the Matter wherein it consisteth : And this respecteth , 1. The Soule , 3. The Good-name of each other . 2. The Body , 4. The Goods     The ioynt duties which are to be performed to others , respect 1. Those who are in the house . 2. Those who are out of the house .   They who are in the house are 1. Members of the familie . 2. Guests which come to the familie .   Many more particulars are comprised vnder these generall heads , which I purpose distinctly to deliuer , as I come to them in their seuerall proper places . §. 2. Of Matrimoniall vnitie . The first , highest , chiefest , and most absolutely necessarie common-mutuall dutie betwixt Man and Wife , is Matrimoniall Vnitie , whereby husband and wife doe account one another to be one flesh , and accordingly preserue the inuiolable vnion whereby they are knit together . This is that dutie which the Apostle inioyneth to husbands and wiues , in these words , Let not the wife depart from her husband : Let not the husband put away his wife . He there speaketh of renouncing each other , and making the matrimoniall bond frustrate , and of no effect : which bond he would haue to be kept firme and inuiolable , and they two who are thereby made one , constantly to remaine one , and not to make themselues two againe . This matrimoniall vnitie is so necessarie , as it may not be dis-united or dissolued though one be a Christian , the other a Pagan . If any brother ( saith the Apostle ) hath a wife that beleeueth not , let him not put her away . And the woman which hath an husband that beleeueth not , let her not leaue him . The reasons of this inuiolable vnion are especially two : One taken from the Author of mariage : the other from the Nature thereof . 1. The Author of mariage is God. It is his ordinance : and he it is that by his ordinance hath made of two , one flesh . Now marke the consequence which Christ as a ruled case , and vndeniable principle inferreth thereon , What God hath ioyned together let no man put asunder : If no man , then nor wife , nor husband himselfe . 2. Such is the Nature of the matrimoniall bond as it maketh of two one , and * more firmely bindeth them two together , then any other bond can binde any other two together , how then should they be two againe ? §. 3. Of Desertion . The vice contrary to matrimoniall vnitie is Desertion , when one of the maried couple through indignation of the true religion , and vtter detestation thereof , or some other like cause , shall apparently renounce all matrimoniall vnitie , and withdraw him or her selfe from all societie with the other , and liue among Infidels , Idolaters , heretiques , or other such persecutors , as a faithfull Christian with safetie of life , or a good conscience , cannot abide among ; and though all good meanes that can be thought of be vsed to reclaime the partie so departed , yet nothing will preuaile , but obstinatly persisteth in renouncing all matrimoniall fellowship . This Desertion is in the case of mariage so capitall , as it freeth the innocent partie from any further seeking after the other . In which respect the Apostle saith , If the vnbeleeuing depart , let him depart . A brother or a sister is not vnder bondage in such cases , 1 Cor. 7. 15. By bondage he meaneth matrimoniall subiection ( by reason whereof neither of the maried persons haue power of their owne body , but one of the others . ) Now they that are not vnder this bondage , are not bound to seeke after it . That Desertion therefore on the delinquents part is such dissolution of mariage , as freeth the innocent partie from the bondage thereof . In many reformed Churches beyond the seas Desertion is accounted so farre to dissolue the very bond of mariage , as libertie is giuen to the partie forsaken to marie another : and it is also applied to other cases then that which is aboue mentioned : as when an Infidell , Idolater , or Heretique shall depart from one of the true religion for other causes then hatred of religion : or when both man and wife hauing liued as Idolaters among Idolaters , one of them being conuerted to the true faith , leaueth his abode among Idolaters , and goeth to the professors of the true faith , but can by no meanes get the other partie to remoue : or when one of the true religion shall depart from another of the same profession , and will by no meanes be brought to liue with the partie so left , but openly manifesteth peremptorie obstinacie ; the matter being heard and adiudged by the Magistrate , the mariage bond may be broken , and libertie giuen to the partie forsaken to mary another . But because our Church hath no such custome , nor our law determined such cases , I leaue them to the custome of other Churches . §. 4. Of matrimoniall Chastitie . The second necessarie common-mutuall mariage-dutie is Matrimoniall chastitie . Chastitie in a large extent is taken for all manner of puritie in soule or body : in which respect the Apostle calleth the Church of God a chaste virgin . But in the sense wherein we here vse it , it especially appertaineth to the body : which is that vertue whereby we possesse our vessels ( to vse the Apostles phrase ) in holinesse and honour : or more plainly to our purpose , whereby we keepe our bodies vndefiled . Chastitie thus restrained to the body is of Single life . Wedlocke .   That of single life is opposed to fornication : and it is either of such as neuer were maried . Such an one was S. Paul , in which respect he wisheth that all were as he , 1 Cor. 7. 7. Or of such as are lawfully freed from the bond of mariage . Such an one the Apostle calleth * a widow indeed . Chastitie of wedlocke is that vertue whereby parties maried , obseruing the lawfull and honest vse of mariage , keepe their bodies from being defiled with strange flesh : thus the Apostle commandeth wiues to be chaste , Tit. 2. 5. So as a they that keepe the lawes of wedlocke are as chaste as they that containe . Here by the way note the dotage of our aduersaries , who thinke there is no chastitie , but of single persons : whereupon in their speeches and writings b they oppose chastitie and matrimonie one to another , as two contraries . Some of their holy Fathers and Popes , and those not the least learned , nor of worst note among them , haue inferred by their arguments against Priests mariage , that Mariage is a liuing in the flesh , a sowing to the flesh , a pollution of the flesh . To that purpose S. Pauls aduice to man and wife to abstaine , that they may giue themselues to fasting and prayer , is vrged : but directly contrarie to the intent of the Apostle . For , 1. He speaketh there of extraordinarie humiliation . 2. He interposeth this limitation , for a time . 3. He saith not simply , that ye may pray , but that ye may giue your selues . ( or haue * leasure ) to prayer : as if it did only hinder , but not pollute prayer . But how can the forenamed spots and blots of mariage stand with that beautie and glorie wherewith the Apostle setteth it forth in these words , Mariage is honourable in all , H●b . 13. 4. If mariage were as Papists set it forth to be , the mariage-bed were verie vnfitly called a bed vndefiled . Behold how contrarie the spirits of S. Paul and of their Popes were . I wot well farre more contrarie then chastitie and matrimonie . But to returne to our matter , cleare it is , that maried persons may be chaste , and accordingly they ought to be chaste . To which purpose the Apostle counselling men and women , for auoiding fornication , to haue wiues and husbands , inserteth this particle OWNE ( Let euerie man haue his OWNE wife , and euerie woman haue her OWNE husband ) whereby he implieth , that they should not haue to doe with any other . That which * Salomon expresseth of an husband , by the rule of relation must be applied to a wife . As the man must be satisfied at all times in his wife , and euen rauisht with her loue ; so must the woman be satisfied at all times in her husband , and euen rauisht with his loue . By the like rule the precept giuen to wiues , to be chaste , must husbands take as directed to themselues also , and be chaste . This dutie did Isaak and Rebekah faithfully and mutually performe each to other . 1. It was one maine end , why mariage ( especially since the fall of man ) was ordained , to liue chastely . This the Apostle implieth , where he saith , to auoid fornication , let euerie man haue his owne wife , and let euerie woman haue her owne husband . And againe , If they cannot containe let them marrie . 2. By chastitie is a godly seed preserued on earth . By this reason doth the Prophet Malachie inforce this dutie . For after he had said , that the Lord made one , meaning of two one flesh by mariage , he inferreth this exhortation , Therefore take heed to your spirit , and let none deale vnfaithfully against the wife of his youth . 3. An especiall part of the honour of mariage consisteth in chastitie : whereupon the Apostle hauing giuen this high commendation of mariage , that it is honourable in all , addeth this clause ( and the bed vndefiled ) to shew the reason of that honour . As if he had said , Because the mariage-bed is in it selfe a bed vndefiled , mariage is therefore in it selfe honourable , and doth so farre remaine honourable , as the bed remaineth vndefiled . §. 5. Of Adulterie . The vice contrarie to matrimoniall chastitie is Adulterie , one of the most capitall vices in that estate : a vice whereby way is made for Diuorce : as is cleare and euident by the determination of Christ himselfe , concerning that point , first a propounded in his sermon on the mount , and againe b repeated in his conference with the Pharisies , where condemning vniust diuorces , he excepteth the diuorce made for adulterie . And great reason there is thereof . For c the adulterer maketh himselfe one flesh with his harlot . Why then should he remaine to be one flesh with his wife ? Two ( saith the Law ) shall be one flesh : not three . The like may be said of a wife committing adulterie . §. 6. Of pardoning adulterie vpon repentance . Quest . Seeing by adulterie iust cause of diuorce is giuen , may this fault vpon the repentance of the delinquent person be so forgiuen , as no diuorce be sought by the innocent person , but both continue to liue together in wedlocke as before ? Answ . Though it be not meet in this case , to impose it as an inuiolable law vpon the innocent partie , to retaine the delinquent , because of repentance ( for we haue direct and strict warrant for it ) yet I doubt not but they may so doe , if they will , and that without iust exception to the contrarie , they ought so to doe . For the law of diuorce did not necessarily enioyne any to sue out the bill , but only afforded them libertie to vse that punishment if they saw cause . I doubt not but for warrant of this libertie , we may take Gods patterne , in retaining Churches and people after they haue committed spirituall adulterie : and Christs forgiuing the woman that had committed adulterie . For , d Seeing Christ said to an adult eresse , I condemne thee not , goe and sinne no more , who cannot conceiue that an husband ought to forgiue that which he seeth the Lord both of husband and wife hath forgiuen : and that he ought not to account her an adulteresse , whose fault he beleeueth to be blotted out , by the mercie of God , vpon her repentance ? §. 7. Of the difference of adultery in a man , and in a wife . Quest . Is the bond of mariage as much violated on the mans part when he committeth adulterie as on the womans when she doth so ? Answ . Though the ancient Romans and Canonists haue aggrauated the womans fault in this kinde farre aboue the mans , and giuen the man more priuiledges then the woman , yet I see not how that difference in the sinne can stand with the tenour of Gods word . I denie not but that more inconueniences may follow vpon the womans default then vpon the mans : as , greater infamy before men , worse disturbance of the family , more mistaking of legitimate , or illegitimate children , with the like . The man cannot so well know which be his owne children , as the woman ; he may take base children to be his owne , and so cast the inheritance vpon them ; and suspect his owne to be basely borne , and so depriue them of their patrimony . But the woman is freed from all such mistakings . Yet in regard of the breach of wedlocke , and transgression against God , the sinne of either partie is alike . Gods word maketh no disparity betwixt them . At the beginning God said of them both , a they two shall be one flesh : not the woman only with the man , but the man also with the woman is made one flesh . b Their power also ouer one another in this respect is alike . If on iust occasion they abstaine , c it must be with mutuall consent . If the husband leaue his wife , d she is as free , as he should be , if she left him . Accordingly the punishment which by Gods law was to be inflicted on Adulterers is the same , whether the man or the woman be the delinquent , ( Deut. 22. 22. ) If difference be made , it is meet that adulterous husbands be so much the more seuerely punished , by how much the more it appertaineth to them to excell in vertue , and to gouerne their wiues by example . §. 8. Of the hainousnesse of Adulterie . But to returne to the discouery of the hainousnesse of Adulterie , I finde no sinne thorowout the whole Scripture so notoriously in the seuerall colours thereof set forth , as it is . For besides that it is a by name forbidden in the Decalogue , it is further expresly branded to be committed , 1. Against each person in the holy Trinitie : the Father ( whose b couenant is broken ) the Sonne ( whose c members are made the members of an harlot ) and the Holy Ghost ( whose d Temple is polluted . ) 2. Against ones neighbour , as e the partie with whom the sinne is committed ( for this sinne cannot be committed singly by one alone ) the husband and wife of each partie f who cannot rest contented with any satisfaction ) the g children borne in adulterie ( whom they brand with an indelible character of infamie , and depriue of many priuiledges that otherwise they might enioy ) the h alliance and friends of each partie ( to whom the griefe and disgrace of this foule sinne reacheth ) the whole family appertaining to either of them ( for i this is as a fire in an house ) the towne , citie , and nation where such vncleane birds roost ( for k all they lie open to the vengeance of God for this sinne ) and the very Church of God ( the l holy seed whereof is by this sinne hindred ) 3. Against the parties themselues that commit this sinne , and that against their m soules , n bodies , o name , p goods , and all that appertaineth to them . As this sinne is in it selfe a sinfull sinne , so by the bitter and cursed fruits which proceed from it , it is made out of measure sinfull . For 1. By it husbands and wiues affection ( which of all other ought to be the most inuiolable ) is so alienated , as seldome it is reconciled againe . 2. By it the goods of the family are much wasted : the adulterous husband spending that wherewith he should prouide for his family , on his harlot : and the adulterous wife purloining what she can from her husband . 3. By it husbands and wiues are stirred vp to wish , and long after one anothers death : and not only inwardly in heart to wish it , but outwardly also in deed to practise it . 4. If from this sinne there arise not a gauling and terrifying conscience ( as oft there doth ) then ( which is worse ) a seared conscience , an hard heart , a reprobate sense , and an impudent face . Wherefore God accordingly deales with such sinners . In his soule q he hateth them : by his word he hath denounced many fearefull iudgements against them , both in r this world , and in ſ the world to come ( against no sinne more . ) This sin is reckoned to be one of the most principall causes of the greatest iudgements that euer were inflicted in the world : as of the t generall deluge : of that u fire and brimstone which destroied Sodome and Gomorrah : of * Canaans spuing out her Inhabitants : of that x plague which destroied in one day 24000 : and of the y Israelites captiuitie , with the like : By all which we see that fearefull doome verified , z Whoremongers , and adulterers God will iudge . Now consider what * a fearefull thing it is to fall into the hands of the liuing God. §. 9. Of remedies against Adulterie , and in particular of due beneuolence , and of defect or excesse therein . For preuenting this hainous sinne ( to omit many other remedies which Gods word hath prescribed , as a a diligent keeping of the heart ( that lustfull thoughts proceed not from thence ) of the b eies ( that they wander not on the beautie or propernesse of any ones person , or on lasciuious pictures , or any other like allurements ) of the c eares ( that they hearken not to any inticements of others ) of the d tongue ( that it vtter no vnchaste and corrupt communication ) of the e lips ( that they delight not in wanton kisses ) of the f hands ( that they vse no wanton daliance ) of the g feet ( that they carry thee not too neere to the place where adulterie may be committed ) of thy h company ( that thou be not defiled with others wantonnesse and vncleannesse ) of thy i diet ( that it be not immoderate ) of thine k apparell ( that it be not garish and lasciuious ) of thy l time ( that it be not vainly and idly spent ) to omit , I say , these and other like remedies . ) One of the best remedies that can be prescribed to maried persons ( next to an l awfull feare of God , and a continuall setting of him before them , wheresoeuer they are ) is , that husband and wife mutually delight each in other , and maintaine a pure and feruent loue betwixt themselues , yeelding that m due beneuolence one to another which is warranted & sanctified by Gods word , and ordained of God for this particular end . This due beneuolence ( as the Apostle stileth it ) is one of the most proper and essentiall acts of mariage : and necessary for the maine and principall ends thereof : as for preseruation of chastitie in such as haue not the gift of continency , for increasing the world with a legitimate brood , and for linking the affections of the maried couple more firmely together . These ends of mariage , at least the two former , are made void without this duty be performed . As it is called * beneuolence because it must be performed with good will and delight , willingly , readily and cheerefully ; so it is said to be * due because it is a debt which the wife oweth to her husband , and he to her . n For the wife hath not the power of her owne body , but the husband ; and likewise also the husband hath not the power of his owne body , but the wife . I haue my warrant from the Apostle to prescribe this dutie as a remedie against adulterie . For o to auoid fornication , he aduiseth man and wife to render due beneuolence one to another . If then this question be moued ( How will mariage keep men and women from adulterie ? ) this answer out of the Apostles words may be giuen ( by rendring due beneuolence : ) which he further inculcateth by declaring the mischiefe that may follow vpon the neglect of this dutie , namely p a casting of themselues into the snares of Satan . Well might he presse this dutie to that end , because no other meanes is of like force : nor fasting , nor watching , nor hard lodging , nor long trauell , nor much labour , nor cold , nor solitarinesse , nor any thing else . * Some that haue by these meanes endeuoured much to beat downe their bodies , and subdue lust ( but neglected the forenamed remedie ) haue notwithstanding felt lust boiling in them . There are two extremes contrarie to this dutie . One in the defect : another in the excesse . Defect therein is , when in case of need it is not required , or being required by the one , it is not yeelded by the other . Modestie is pretended by some for not requiring it : but in a duty so warrantable and needfull , pretence of modesty is ( to speake the least ) a signe of great infirmitie , and a cause of much iniquitie . To denie this dutie being iustly required , is to denie a due debt , and to giue Satan great aduantage . The punishment inflicted on Onan , ( Gen. 38. 9 , 10. ) sheweth how great a wrong this is . From that punishment * the Hebrews gather that this sinne is a kinde of murther . It is so much the more hainous when hatred , stoutnesse , nicenesse , feare of hauing too many children , or any other like respects , are the cause thereof . Excesse is either in the measure , or in the time . In the measure , when husband or wife is insatiable ; prouoking , rather then asswaging lust , and weakning their naturall vigor more then suppressing their vnnaturall humor . Many husbands and wiues are much oppressed by their bedfellowes vnsatiablenesse in this kinde . In the time , when it is against Pietie , Mercy , or Modestie . 1. Against Pietie , when no day , nor dutie of Religion , no not extraordinarie daies , and duties of humiliation , will make them forbeare . q The Prophets bidding the bridegroome and ●ride goe out of their chamber in the day of a Fast , and r the Apostles excepting of Praier and fasting , where he enioineth this dutie of due beneuolence , shew that in the time of a Fast it must ●e forborne . 2. Against Mercy , when one of the married couple being weake by sicknesse , paine , labour , trauell , or any other like ●eanes , and through that weaknesse not well able to performe his dutie , the other notwithstanding will haue it performed . ● will haue mercy , and not sacrifice , saith the Lord. Shall Gods sacrifice giue place to mercy , and shall not mans or womans 〈◊〉 ? for so I may well terme this vnseasonable desire . Quest . What if an husband or wife continue so long sicke , ●● otherwise weake , as the other cannot containe ? Answ . In such cases of necessitie the body must be beaten ●wne , and earnest praier made for the gift of continency : for ●redly the Lord who hath brought thee to that necessitie , all giue thee grace sufficient . 3. Against Modesty , ſ when husbands require this duty in that me , which vnder the Law was called the time of a wiues separation for her disease ( Leu. 15. 19. &c. ) For what can be expected ●m such polluted copulation , but a leprous and loathsome generation ? This kinde of intemperancie is expresly forbidden ( Leuit. 18. 19. ) and a capitall punishment inflicted on such as offended therein ( Leuit. 20. 18. ) Abstinence in this time is set in the catalogue of those notes which declare a man to be righteous ( Eccles . 20. 7. ) and the contrary intemperancy is put in the roll of such abominations as prouoked God to spue out the Canaanits ( Leuit. 18. 28. ) and to forsake his owne inheritance ( Ezek. 22. 10. ) To this kinde of intemperancie * some referre a mans knowing of his wife after she hath conceiued with childe . But I finde no such matter condemned in Gods word : neither dare I make that a sinne which is not there condemned . t Certaine Sectaries among the Iewes are branded for this error . 1. Obiect . No other creature will so doe : so as it may seeme to be against nature . Answ . 1. I denie the argument : though some forbeare , yet all doe not . 2. I denie the consequence : for other creatures are not so tied one male to one female , as an husband to his owne wife . * Besides , that which beasts by nature are tied vnto , must be left to mans discretion . 2. Obiect . After a woman hath once conceiued , no more conceptions can be expected , till she be deliuered . Answ . Conception is not the only end of this dutie : for it is to be rendred to such as are barren . Quest . What if the wife giue sucke to her childe , ought not her husband then to forbeare ? Answ . Because giuing sucke is a mother dutie , man ought to doe what he can to containe . §. 10. Of mutuall loue betwixt man and wife . Hitherto of those common mutuall duties which tend to the preseruation of the very being of mariage , and are in that respect absolutely necessarie . The other common mutuall duties ( though they be not of so absolute necessitie as the former ) are in their kinde necessary for the good estate of mariage , and for the better preseruing of that knot : so as , if they be not performed , the end and right vse of mariage will be peruerted , & that estate made vncomfortable , & very burdensome . The first of these is Loue. A louing mutuall affection must passe betwixt husband and wife , or else no dutie will be well performed : this is the ground of all the rest . In some respects Loue is proper and peculiar to an husband , as * I purpose to shew when I come to speake of an husbands particular duties . But Loue is also required of wiues , and they are commanded to be louers of their husbands , as well as husbands to loue their wiues : so as it is a common mutuall dutie belonging to husband and wife too : and that is true wedlocke , when man and wife are linked together by the bond of loue . Vnder loue all other duties are comprised : for without it no dutie can be well performed . a Loue is the fulfilling of the Law , that is , the very life of all those duties which the law requireth . It is the b bond of perfection , which bindeth together all those duties that passe betwixt partie and partie . Where loue aboundeth , there all duties will readily and cheerefully be performed . Where loue is wanting , there euery duty will either be altogether neglected , or so carelesly performed , that as good not be performed at all : in which respect the Apostle willeth , that all things be done in loue . Loue as it prouoketh the partie in whom it ruleth to doe all the good it can ; so it stirreth vp the partie loued to repay good for good . It is like fire , which is not only hot in it selfe , but also conueigheth heat into that which is neere it : whence ariseth a reflection of heat from one to another . Note how admirably this is set forth betwixt Christ and his Spouse in the Song of Salomon : and it is further manifested in the examples of all good husbands and wiues noted in the Scripture : they did mutually beare a very louing affection one to another . Though loue be a general duty which euery one oweth to another , euen to his enemie , yet the neerer that God hath linked any together , the more are they bound to this dutie , and the more must they abound therein . But of all others are * man and wife most neerely and firmly linked together . Of all others therefore are they most bound hereunto , & that in the highest degree that may be , euen like to Ionathans loue , who loued Dauid as his owne soule . Salomon saith , He that findeth a wife findeth a good thing , and obtaineth fauour of the Lord : which by the rule of relation is also true of an husband , Shee that findeth an husband findeth a good thing , and obtaineth fauour of the Lord. Man and wife therefore are each to other an especiall pledge of Gods fauour , and in this respect aboue all others vnder God to be loued . If this be the ground ( as it ought to be ) of their mutuall loue , their loue will be feruent and constant . Neither will the want , or withering of any outward allurements , as beautie , personage , parentage , friends , riches , honours , or the like , with-hold or with-draw , extinguish or extenuate their loue : neither will any excellencies of nature or grace in other husbands and wiues draw their hearts from their owne to those other : nor yet will the loue of a former yoake-fellow dead and gone , any whit lessen the loue of the liuing mate . This instance I haue the rather mentioned , because in many , who are farre from setting their affection on strange flesh , their loue of a former husband or wife departed is so fast fixed in their heart , as they can neuer againe so intirely loue any other . They who are so minded are not fit to be ioined with another yoke-fellow after they are loosed from one . If they mary againe , and manifest such a minde , they plainly shew that they respect this or that person more then Gods ordinance . By Gods ordinance man and wife are no longer bound one to another then they liue together . Death is an absolute diremption , and maketh an vtter dissolution of the mariage bond . If the man be dead , the wife is deliuered from the law of the man , so as shee may take another man. Which liberty is also giuen to the man. Being now free , if they mary another ( that other being now a true husband or wife ) their loue must be as intire to that other as it was to the former : yea , and more intire , if there were any defect in the former . For as children maried out of their parents house must not retaine such a loue of their parents as shall swallow vp their loue of the partie to whom they are maried , but must according to the law , leaue father and mother , and cleaue to their yoke-fellow : so neither must the loue of a former husband or wife be predominant when they are maried to another . This other must be as close cleaued vnto , as if they had neuer beene ioined to a former . The liuing husband or wife is the present pledge of Gods fauour . He is now thine owne husband : and she is now thine owne wife : and not the partie that is dead . I denie not but the memorie of a vertuous husband or wife ought to be pretious to the suruiuing partie : for the memoriall of the iust is blessed . But as the vertue of a person deceased may not be buried with the dead corps : so neither may the person be kept aboue ground with the memorie of his or her vertue : which after a sort is done , when loue of the partie deceased either taketh away , or extenuateth the loue of the liuing . This is to giue dominion to the dead ouer the liuing : which is more then the law enioyneth . §. 11. Of husbands and wiues mutuall hatred contrary to loue . There is a generation of so crabbed and crooked a disposition as they cannot loue , but rather hate one another because they are man and wife : for many husbands hauing wiues , and wiues husbands euery way worthy to be loued , will notwithstanding say to the astonishment of the hearers , I haue indeed a good husband , or I haue a good wife : but I cannot loue him , or I cannot loue her : and being demanded a reason , sticke not openly and impudently to reply , I thinke I could loue him if he were not mine husband , or I thinke I could loue her if she were not my wife . O more then monstrous impudencie ! Is not this directly to oppose against Gods ordinance , and against that order which he hath set betwixt man and woman ? Is it not to trample vnder foot Gods fauour ? Though there were nothing else to moue loue but this , that such an one is thine husband , or such an one is thy wife , yet this should be motiue enough . And shall this be the ground of thine hatred ? Assuredly such a spirit is a plaine diabolicall spirit , contrary to that spirit which is from aboue ; and if it be not cast out , it will cast those whom it possesseth into the fire of hell . §. 12. Of mutuall peace betwixt Man and Wife . Among other meanes of maintaining an inward louing affection betwixt man and wife , outward mutuall peace , concord , and agreement is one of the principall . Whereupon the Apostle exhorteth to keepe the vnitie of the spirit in the bond of peace : for peace is a bond that tieth one to another , and maketh them to be as one , euen one in spirit : as on the contrary side outward discord disunites mens spirits . We are enioined to follow peace with all men : how much more of all persons ought husbands to haue peace with their wiues , and wiues with their husbands ? they are neerer then brothers and sisters . Behold then how good and pleasant a thing it is for them to dwell together in vnity . * Dwell together they must : but without peace there is no dwelling together : It is better to dwell in a corner of the house top then with a contentious woman in a wide house . Persons at variance were farre better be out of sight and place , then present together . Out of sight and place man and wife must not be , at peace therefore they must be . Mutuall peace betwixt them is a great refreshing to their mindes , being beaten with the discords of others . It is said that a wife is in this respect as an hauen to man ( how much more man to his wife ? ) If the hauen be calme , and free from stormes and tempests , what a refreshing will it be to the Mariner that hath beene tossed in the sea with windes and waues ? For maintaining peace , 1. All offences so much as possibly may be must be auoided . The husband must be watchfull ouer himselfe that he giue no offence to his wife : and so the wife on the other side . Offences cause contentions . 2. When an offence is giuen by the one partie , it must not be taken by the other ; but rather passed by : and then will not peace be broken . The second blow makes the fray . 3. If both be incensed together , the fire is like to be the greater : with the greater speed therefore must they both labour to put it out . Wrath must not lie in bed with two such bed-fellowes : neither may they part beds for wrath sake . That this fire may be the sooner quenched , they must both striue first to offer reconciliation . Theirs is the glory who doe first begin , for they are most properly the blessed peacemakers . Not to accept peace when it is offered is more then heathenish : but when wrath is incensed , to seeke atonement is the dutie of a Christian , and a grace that commeth from aboue . 4. Children , seruants , nor any other in the family must be bolstred vp by the one against the other . The mans partaking with any of the house against his wife , or the wiues against her husband , is an vsuall cause of contention betwixt man and wife . 5. They must forbeare to twit one another in the teeth with the husbands or wiues of other persons : or with their owne former husbands or wiues ( in case they haue had any before . ) Comparisons in this kinde are very odious . They stir vp much passion , and cause great contentions . 6. Aboue all they must take heed of rash and vniust iealousie , which is the bane of mariage , and greatest cause of discontent that can be giuen betwixt man and wife . Iealous persons are ready to picke quarrels , and to seeke occasions of discord : they will take euery word , looke , action , and motion , in the worse part , and so take offence where none is giuen . When iealousie is once kindled , it is as a flaming fire that can hardly be put out . It maketh the partie whom it possesseth implacable . 7. In all things that may stand with a good conscience they must endeuour to please one another : and either of them suffer their owne will to be crossed , rather then discontent to be giuen to the other . Saint Paul noteth this as a common mutuall dutie belonging to them both , and expresseth their care thereof vnder a word that signifieth more then ordinarie care , and implieth a diuiding of the minde into diuers thoughts , casting this way , and that way , and euery way how to giue best content . §. 13. Of contentions betwixt man and wife . Contrary to mutuall peace are contentions betwixt man and wife : which are too frequent in most families , and by which the common good is much hindered . Discord betwixt man and wife in an house is as contention betwixt the master and pilot in a ship : may not great danger , and much mischiefe be thence iustly feared ? We heard before that man to his wife , and she to him , is as an hauen . Now by experience we finde that if the hauen be tempestuous it is much more troublesome , and dangerous to the Mariner then the wide sea . Wherefore let man and wife be of the same minde one to another as Abraham was to Lot , and when occasions of discord are offered , say , Let there be no strife betwixt thee and me , for we are man and wife : no more two , but one flesh . §. 14. Of husbands and wiues dwelling together . From a mutuall affection of loue proceedeth a mutuall prouident care in husband and wife one for another . In handling whereof we will first note the meanes whereby their mutuall prouidence may be the better effected and manifested , and then the matter whereabout it must be conuersant . The meanes in one word is cohabitation . For a dutie it is that man and wife dwell together . The phrase vsed in setting out the womans creation ( he built a woman , whereby the erecting of a family is intimated ) implieth as much : so doth the law of mariage whereby man is enioyned to leaue father and mother , and to cleaue vnto his wife , that is , to goe out of his fathers house , and to dwell with his wife : and so doth this phrase ( forget thy fathers house ) taken from the dutie of a wife , and mystically applied to the Church . Saint Peter expresly chargeth husbands to dwell with their wiues : and Saint Paul layeth it to the charge both of husbands and wiues not to leaue one another , but to dwell together , yea though the one be an infidell . Surely it was conscience of this dutie which made the e Leuite to goe after his wife , that went away from him , to bring her home againe : and which made f Iaakobs wiues to leaue their fathers house , and goe with their husband . * The word vnder which Saint Peter compriseth this dutie is a title appropriated to an husband : and an answerable title is appropriated to a wife : from which the notation of our two vsuall English words ( husband , housewife ) doth not much differ . The power which the one hath of the others body , and the aduantage which by liuing asunder , they giue vnto Satan , ( both of which are expresly noted , 1 Cor. 7. 4 , 5. ) doe shew the necessity of this dutie : and the many benefits arising from thence doe further presse the equity of it . By husbands and wiues dwelling together all mariage duties are better performed : mutuall loue is better bred , preserued , and increased : the good gifts of either of them are better obserued by the other : better helpe and succour is mutually by each afforded to the other : and in fine they are made more capable of doing good one to another , and of receiuing good one from another . Why then should they haue any minde of liuing asunder , vnlesse they be forced by extraordinary occasions , as captiuity , close imprisonment , contagious sicknesse , and such like , which are no faults of theirs , but crosses to be borne with griefe ; and instant praier , together with all other good meanes , to be vsed to bring them together againe ? Yea if the imprisonment , banishment , or other like kinde of absence , be such as one may if they will come at the other , the partie that is free ought to come to the other , if at least that other require it . §. 15. Of the respects for which man and wife may for a time liue asunder . Quest . May there be any iust causes for man and wife willingly to liue asunder ? Answ . There can nor ought to be any cause of vtter relinquishing one another , which is a kinde of * desertion : but for liuing asunder for a time there may be iust causes , as 1. Weighty and vrgent affaires which concerne the good of the Church , or commonwealth : as when a man is sent forth to warre , or on an ambassage ( in which case though he may take his wife with him , yet is he not necessarily bound there to , especially if the place whither he is sent be farre off , the passage thereto difficult and dangerous , and his abode there not long . ) When b Reuben , Gad , and halfe the tribe of Manassch passed ouer Iorden to helpe their brethren in their battels against the Canaanites , they left their wiues behinde them in their families : c when Vriah went to warre , he left his wife at home : and d when Moses was to bring Israel out of Egypt , his wife remained at her fathers house . 2. Maine duties of their particular calling : as of Mariners , who are oft to be on the sea : Merchants who trade in other countries : Lawyers who attend publike places of iustice : Courtiers , who in their months , or quarters , attend their Prince : Keepers of women in child-bed , and sicke persons : and other nurses . Prouided alwaies that in these , and other like cases , there be a ioynt and mutuall consent of both parties : for if man and wife may not defraud one another for a time to giue themselues to fasting and praier without consent : much lesse may they for lighter occasions liue any time asunder without consent . Prouided also that they take no delight to liue asunder , but rather be grieued that they are forced so to doe : and in testimony thereof to take all occasions that they can to manifest their longing desire one after another by letters , messages , tokens , and other like kindnesses : and to returne with all the speed they can . No distance , or absence ought any whit to diminish their mutuall loue . §. 16. Of the errour of Papists about man and wifes separation . Contrarie to the dutie of cohabitation is the doctrine of Papists , whereby they teach , that Separation may be made betwixt man and wife for many causes from bed , or cohabitation , for a certaine or vncertaine time . The Councell of Trent is bold to denounce Anathema against such as say , the Church erreth therein . If the many causes which they alledge , besides adulterie , be well weighed , we shall finde them without all warrant of Gods word . * They draw them to two heads , 1. Mutuall consent . 2. Demerit . By consent ( say they ) of both parties maried to attaine a greater and perfecter estate , mariage consummate may be loosed from bed and cohabitation . Answ . 1. In mariage there is a couenant of God ( Prou. 2. 17. ) as well as of the two parties : the consent therefore of parties is not sufficient to breake it . 2. No estate in this world can be greater or perfecter then is meet for maried persons . Adam and Eue in their best estate were maried : and now is mariage honourable in all . 3. The estates which they count more perfect , are either such as are not in mans power ( as perpetuall continencie ) or such as may be as well performed by maried persons as by single persons ( as Ecclesiasticall functions ) if at least they be such as are warranted by Gods word . High Priests , and other Priests , all sorts of Leuites , extraordinarie Prophets and Apostles were maried . What greater functions then these ? The causes which for demerit , they say , make a separation , ●re 1. Adulterie . 2. Departing from the Catholike faith . 3. Soli●iting or impelling vnto sinne . Concerning * Adulterie , we denie not , but that it giueth ●ust cause of diuorce : but withall we say ( as a we haue good warrant from Christs words ) that it is the only cause of iust di●orce . For to make a separation for departing from the Catholike faith , is directly contrarie to S. Pauls and S. Peters doctrine , 1 Cor. 7. 12 , 13 , 14. 1 Pet. 3. 1. As for soliciting and impelling vnto sinne , though it may be cause to moue an husband or a wife to walke more warily and wisely , and in extremitie to auoid societie for a time , or to com●laine to the Magistrate for releefe , who may see it meet to lay ●he delinquent person in prison , or else otherwise keepe them sunder till that delinquent be reclaimed and brought to a better minde : yet is it no sufficient cause finally to dissolue ma●age in regard of bed and cohabitation . They vrge that if the right eye cause to offend , it must be pluc●d out . Ans . 1. That is but a metaphor , and may sundry other wayes 〈◊〉 applied . 2. The words are not simply , but by way of comparison to ●e taken , rather plucke it out , then to be made to stumble thereby . 3. Plucking out , applied to the point in hand , may be by ●any other wayes , then by dissoluing mariage . 4. That generall inhibition ( whosoeuer shall put away his wife , causeth her to commit adulterie ) restrained only with the exception of fornication , admitteth neither this , nor any other such cause of dissoluing mariage . §. 17. Of husbands and wiues vnlawfull absenting themselues one from another . Contrarie also to the forenamed dutie of cohabitation , is the practise of many men , who liuing themselues in one place ( suppose at London ) send their wiues vnto some countrey house , and there euen mew them vp , as Hawkes , neuer caring to come at them , but are then most merrie , when their wiues are farthest off . If their wiues liue at home they will be abroad , mealing and lodging where their wiues shall not know : their owne house is as a prison to them : they are not well , but when they are out of it . Of the like lewd conceit and practife are many wiues , who on no other occasion then meere lightnesse , being eager in pursuing their pleasures , and satisfying their lusts , gad out of their owne houses in the day , lie out of them in the night , and remaine in other company dayes and nights : or at least are glad when their husbands haue occasion to be from home ; not vnlike to the light huswife which Salomon describeth , Prou. 7. 10. &c. I speake of matters too famous , or rather infamous . I would there were no iust cause to taxe this lightnesse . But let such as desire to approue themselues to God or man , take heed of these hainous and more then heathenish vices . Though Israel play the harlot , yet let not Iudah offend . Too neere to the forenamed kinde of vnlawfull separation doe they come , who though they liue both in one house , yet make that house by their estranging themselues one from another as two houses : the man abiding in one end thereof , his wife in another : and so haue their seuerall roomes , seuerall tables , seuerall seruants , all seuerall : Or if the straitnesse of their house will not suffer them so to part other roomes , yet they will haue seuerall bed-chambers , or at least seuerall beds : so as they that shall call them bed-fellowes , shall but nicke-name them . Thus they rob each other of that due beneuolence which they mutually owe one to another , they expose themselues to the deuils snares , they more and more estrange their hearts one from another , and depriue themselues of such mutuall comforts and helpes , as by matrimoniall societie they might afford to , and receiue from one another . §. 18. Of husbands and wiues mutuall prayers . The matter whereabout husbands and wiues mutuall prouidence ought to be conuersant , is in generall the good of one another ; that each of them doe that for the other , which Salomon in particular applieth to a wife , viz. good and not euill all the dayes of their life . Now the good of man extendeth to his soule , bodie , good name , and goods . A generall dutie tending to the good of all these is prayer . S. Peter requireth such a cariage of man and wife one towards another , as their prayers be not hindred : whereby he taketh it for grant , that prayer is a mutuall dutie which one oweth to the other : which dutie Isaak performed for his wife . Herein may man and wife be helpfull each to other in all things needfull to either of them : for it is the meanes which God in wisdome hath sanctified for the obtaining of euerie needfull blessing for ourselues or others . By many it is counted but a slight dutie and of small vse ; but the truth is , that to performe it aright , in truth and faith , is both difficult in the deed , and powerfull in the effect . It is the best dutie that one can performe for another , and the least to be neglected . We heard before , that Isaak prayed for his wife : and to shew the good he did to her thereby , it is noted , that the Lord was intreated of him : so as she , being barren before , by that meanes conceiued . All the physicke in the world could not haue done her so much good . a Alwayes therefore , b without ceasing is this dutie to be performed . Whensoeuer man and wife make any prayer , therein they must be mindfull of one another : yea and oft must they of purpose take occasion to make prayers in speciall one for another : and that both in absence , and also in presence of one another . This latter doth especially concerne the husband , who is as a Priest vnto his wife , and ought to be her mouth to God when they two are together : yet I doubt not , but that the wife may pray in the husbands presence when they two are alone , ●ither for triall ( that he may haue knowledge of her abilitie and gift in that kinde ) or for helpe ( if the wife be much better able to performe that duty then the man is , as many wiues are . ) Not without cause therefore haue I reckoned this among common mutuall duties . §. 19. Of the things for which husbands and wiues are to pray alone . There are sundry needfull blessings which husbands and wiues are to pray for that appertaine only to themselues , and are most meet to be mentioned in priuate praier betwixt themselues , as 1. That as they two are one flesh , so they may be also one spirit : that their hearts may be as one , knit together by a true , spirituall , matrimoniall loue : alwayes delighting one in another , euer helpfull one to another , and readie with all willingnesse and cheerefulnesse to performe all those duties which they owe one to another . 2. That their mariage bed may be sanctified : and as it is by Gods ordinance , so it may remaine to them by their well vsing it , a bed vndefiled . There is no other thing , for which mutuall prayer in priuate betwixt man and wife is more needfull : and that so much the rather , because of the naturall heat of lust which is in most : which if it be not by prayer ( the best meanes for that purpose ) asswaged , it may proue a defilement of the vndefiled bed : and man and wife become adulterers one to another . As other things , so this also is sanctified by the word and praier . The word giueth a warrant and direction for the vse of it : praier both seasoneth it , and procureth a blessing vpon it . 3. That they may haue children , and those such as may be heires of saluation , and liue in this world to their owne and others good : that they may be comely and well proportioned children : nor ideots in vnderstanding , nor monsters in bodily shape , nor yet lewd and infamous in their liues : which could not but be a griefe to their parents , and might also open the mouthes of the wicked against them . 4. That God would giue them competencie of this worlds goods , and other good meanes well to nourish , nurture , and place forth their children : and a sufficiencie for the maintenance of their family , and of that estate wherein God setteth them . 5. That such needfull gifts and graces as are wanting in either of them may be wrought : and such vices and infirmities as they are subiect vnto may be redressed . These and many other like things giue occasion to man and wife in speciall manner to pray one for another , and one with another . §. 20. Of husbands and wiues hatefull imprecations and wishes one against another . Contrary to that holy and heauenly dutie of praier are those direfull and hellish imprecations and execrations , which ordinarily doe passe out of the mouthes of many husbands and wiues against one another ( and that many times for very light occasions ) cursing the day that euer they knew one another , and wishing that one of them had beene vnder the ground before they came together . Most odious are these and such like execrations in any mans mouth , but more then most odious in the mouth of man and wife against one another . Many who for outward shame for beare to belch forth such ●rotten stinking speech , make small conscience of wishing the like in their hearts . If an husband be any whit harsh , and a wife shrewish : or if through sicknesse , or any other like occasion they seeme burdensome each to other : or if any dislike of one arise in the heart of the other : or if their hearts be set vpon others : or if the suruiuor be to carry away the goods and ●ands , their hearts will be filled with a thousand wishes of one anothers death . Yea , many times such as haue very good husbands or wiues , without any shew of reason ( only through an inward corrupton of their heart , and malicious instigation of Satan , not taking notice of their owne good ) are ready to wish they were in heauen : making thereby a pretence of their eternall blisse to whom they so wish , whereas indeed their only desire is to be loosed and freed from them . God oft meets with such wicked wishers ( whereby he sheweth how hatefull such wishes are to him ) for sometimes according to their wish he taketh away good husbands and wiues from those that are euill : and when they are gone he maketh their losse to be so sensibly felt , as those vngodly wishers doe , ( as we speake ) in euery veine of their heart repent them of their rash wishes . Yea , to aggrauate their wretchednesse the more , he giueth them such crabbed and peruerse husbands and wiues in the roome and stead of those good ones ( for seldome comes a better ) as they are forced with many deepe sighs and groanes to wish ( but all in vaine ) their former wiues and husbands aliue againe , and so to verifie the prouerbe , A good thing is not so well discerned by enioying , as by wanting it . Sometimes againe God in anger crosseth their wishes , and first taketh away the wishers of others death : or else prolongeth the life of both to their greater vexation . §. 21. Of husbands and wiues neglect of mutuall praier . The very neglect of mutuall prayer in husbands and wiues for each other is also a sinne contrary to the forenamed dutie of praier : whereof if all that are guiltie were as well knowne to man as to God , how many vnkinde husbands and wiues carelesse of one anothers good would be noted , more then are ? Rare are those husbands and wiues , that haue their seasons to pray alone together one with another , if euer they pray one for another . Though in outward complements they may seeme very kinde , and in the outward things of this world , very prouident , yet if they pray not one for another , they are neither kinde , nor prouident . Heartie , feruent , frequent prayer is the greatest token of kindnesse , and best part of prouidence that can be . §. 22. Of husbands and wiues mutuall care for one anothers saluation . From the generall dutie of praier which is profitable to all things , I come to the particular branches of man and wiues mutuall prouident care : and will first begin with that which is first to be sought , the good of one anothers soule : which the Apostle intimateth to be a thing to be sought after , where he saith , a What knowest thou , ô wife , whether thou shalt SAVE thine husband , or what knowest thou , ô man , whether thou shalt SAVE thy wife ? b S. Peter enioyneth wiues to doe their endeuour to win their husbands : and c S. Paul setteth before husbands the patterne of Christs loue , which had especiall respect to the soule and the saluation thereof : so as this is a mutuall dutie appertaining to them both , which S. Peter further implieth where he stileth them coheires of the grace of life . It is the greatest good that one can possibly doe for another , to be a meanes of helping forward his saluation . And there is nothing that can more soundly and firmely knit the heart of one to another , then to be a meanes thereof . §. 23. Of husbands and wiues care to win one the other , when one of them is not called . That the saluation of the soule may be the better effected , respect must be had to the present and particular estate of husband or wife . If one be a beleeuer the other not , the beleeuer must vse all the meanes that may be , to draw on the other also to beleeue . If both be beleeuers , their mutuall care must be to ●edifie one another in thier most holy faith . For the first , it is the maine drift of S. Peters exhortation to beleeuing wiues , about their conuersation , to draw on their vnbeleeuing husbands to the true faith . His phrase ( that they may be wonne or gained ) as in generall it hath respect to their soules saluation , so in particular to their first conuersion . Now if this dutie appertaine to a wife , much more to an husband , who is appointed an head to his wife , and a Saniour . To this end doth S. Paul aduise beleeuing husbands and wiues that are maried to vnbeleeuers , to dwell with them . For what a wofull thing is it , that two which in this world are so neerely linked together as to make one flesh , should in the world to come be so farre separated one from another , as heauen is from hell . This indeed shall so fall out in many : for Christ hath expresly foretold it , that of two that were one●ed ●ed together ( who are more fitly set forth vnder this phrase then man and wife , who most vsually are stiled bedfellowes ? ) ●ne shall be taken ( to mercy and glory ) the other shall be for saken or left to endlesse and easelesse torture and torment . ) But though it be foretold that thus it shall fall out with many a ●ouple , yet our care must be , and that with our vttermost power , to preuent it , as in our selues , so in our bedfellow . If it please the Lord to giue such a blessing to the endeuour of an husband or wife , as to be a meanes of the conuersion of their bedfellow , then will the partie conuerted both intirely loue the other , and also heartily blesse God ( as there is iust cause ) that euer they were so neerely linked together . This dutie of winning one another , is to be applied to such as are maried not only to plaine infidels , but also to Papists or other like Idolaters , to Atheists , or any other profane persons , to heretiques , separatists , schismatiques , or any that beleeue not aright . §. 24. Of husbands and wiues edifying one another . The second dutie tending to the soules saluation is , that two beleeuers being maried together , they endeuour mutually to build vp one another more and more . b One Christian oweth this dutie to another : much more man and wife . c Take heed ( saith the Apostle ) that no man fall away from the grace of God. If no man , then nor wife nor husband . A spirituall edifying of one another is the best vse which we can make ( and ought to make ) of those d ioynts and bonds whereby we are knit one to another . By vertue of them e the body ( namely the mysticall body of Christ ) receiueth increase to the edifying of it selfe , and d increaseth with the increase of God. Now the bond of mariage being of all other the firmest , and that whereby we are neerest knit together , by vertue of what bond should we edifie one another , if not by vertue of the mariage bond ? §. 25. Of husbands and wiues hindering sinne one in another . Two things are requisite vnto spirituall edification . One respecteth the hinderances of growth in grace . The other the helpes thereof . The hinderances of grace are all manner of sinnes . Sinne to grace is as water to fire : it slaketh the heat of it , and if without hoe it be powred on it , it will cleane put it out . In regard hereof there ought to be a mutuall care in husbands and wiues , both to preuent sinne before it be committed , and also to make what redresse they can after it is committed . That it is a mutuall dutie for husbands and wiues so much as they can , to preuent sinne one in another is euident , by that reason which the Apostle vseth , to keepe them from defrauding one another , in these words , that Satan tempt you not . For out of the scope and matter of those words , this generall doctrine may be gathered , Husbands and wiues ought to be carefull to keepe one another from the temptations of Satan , that is , from sinne , whereunto all his temptations tend . g Rebekah performed the dutie of a good wife in keeping Isaak from blessing Esau : which if he had done , he had sinned against h Gods expresse word . Though she failed in the manner of doing it , yet her end was good . As that loue they owe one to another , so that care which they ought to haue of themselues requireth as much , for sinne prouoketh Gods wrath , his wrath sendeth downe vengeance , that vengeance which falleth on the husband can hardly misse the wife , or that the husband , which falleth on the wife ; and that by reason of their neere vnion : though it fall not on both their pates , yet it cannot but much affect , and euen afflict the partie that escapeth . The wiues of those rebells who were swallowed vp quicke in the wildernesse , perished in like manner with their husbands . For they who are so neere as husbands and wiues , and doe not what they can to preuent one anothers sinnes , make themselues accessary thereto . For the better effecting of this dutie , husbands and wiues must be watchfull ouer one another , and obserue what sinnes either of them are giuen vnto , or what occasions are offered to draw either of them into sinne . If either of them be cholericke or prone to be angry on a sudden , the other must endeuour to take away all occasions of offence : and if both should be testie and hastie to wrath , when the one seeth the other first moued , the partie whose passion is not yet stirred , ought the rather to be setled and composed to all meeknesse and patience , lest , if both together be prouoked , the whole houshold be set on fire . If either of them be giuen to drunkennesse , couetousnesse , or any other sinne , the other ought by wise and gentle perswasions to keepe them ( as much as they can ) from those sinnes . Yea they may also get others , that are discreet and able , to disswade them : or vse what other good meanes they can to that purpose . §. 26. Of husbands and wiues redressing sinne in one another . When either husband or wife is fallen into any sinne , a mutuall dutie it is for the other , to vse what redresse may be of that sinne : as if one of them were wounded , the other must take care for the healing of that wound . Abigail performed her dutie in this kinde , when , after she had heard what churlish entertainment her husband gaue to Dauids seruants , she hastened to carry store of prouision to Dauid , and humbled her selfe before him , and so moued Dauid to asswage his wrath : yea she tooke a seasonable time also to tell her husband his fault , and the danger whereinto he brought himselfe thereby . More directly , and with better successe did Iaakob redresse the superstition , or rather Idolatrie of his wife Rachel , as may be gathered by comparing Gen. 31. 19 , 34 Gen. 35. 2 , 4.   A brother at large must not suffer sinne to lie on his brother : much lesse may husband or wife the one vpon the other . Thou shalt not hate thy brother ( saith the law ) and suffer sinne to lie on him . To doe this then is a token and fruit of hatred . If an husband should see his wife , or a wife her husband lying in the fire , or water , ready to be burnt or drowned , and not afford their best helpe to pull them out , might they not iustly be thought to hate them ? But sinne is as fire and water , which will burne and drowne men in perdition . This dutie may be performed by meeke instructions , pithy perswasions , gentle reproofes : yea , and by the helpe of some good Minister , or other discreet and faithfull friend . §. 27. Of husbands and wiues helping forward the growth of grace in each other . Hitherto of preuenting , and redressing hinderances of grace . Hereunto must be added an helping forward of the growth thereof : which man and wife must mutually endeuour to effect one in another . The care which Elkanah had to carry his wiues along with himselfe vnto the Tabernacle of the Lord yeere by yeere , sheweth that his desire was to vphold them in the feare of God : yea the gifts and portions , which at that time he vsed to bestow on them , implie the care that he had to encourage them to hold on in seruing the Lord. It was without question the maine end which the Shunamite aimed at in prouiding lodging for the Prophet , that both she and her husband might be built vp in Grace . This duty may be the better effected by these means following . 1. By taking notice of the beginning , and least measure of Grace : and approuing the same . 2. By frequent conference about such things as concerne the same : mutually propounding questions one to another thereabouts , and answering the same . 3. By their mutuall practise and example : making themselues each to other a patterne of pietie . 4. By performing exercises of religion , as praying , singing psalmes , reading the word , and the like together . 5. By maintaining holy and religious exercises in the familie . Though this dutie especially appertaine to the husband , yet the wife must put her husband in minde thereof , if he forget it ; and stirre him vp , if he be backward : Thus did the good Shunamite , 2 King. 4. 9 , 10. No mans perswasion in this kinde , can so much preuaile with a man as his wiues . 6. By stirring vp one another to goe to the house of God , to heare the word , partake of the Sacrament , and conscionably performe all the parts of Gods publike worship . Great need there is , that husbands and wiues should endeuour to helpe forward the growth of grace in each other , because we are all so prone to fall away and wax cold , euen as water if the fire goe out , and more fewell be not put vnder . And of all other , husbands and wiues may be most helpfull herein , because they can soonest espie the beginning of decay by reason of their neere , and continuall familiaritie together . §. 28. Of the sinnes of husbands and wiues contrary to a mutuall care of one anothers saluation . The vices contrary to that generall mutuall dutie of husbands and wiues in procuring the Saluation of one another , and to the particular branches comprised vnder it , are many : As 1. A carelesse neglect thereof : when as husbands and wiues so minde earthly things , as they thinke it enough if they be prouident one for another in the things of this life . Hereof most that liue in this earth are guiltie : and among others , euen many of them who haue the name of very good and kinde husbands and wiues . But whatsoeuer the opinion of others be of them , the truth is , that if they faile in this point , they goe no further then the very heathen haue done , and their kindnesse may be as the apes kindnesse , which causeth death . 2. The vnworthy walking , and vnchristian cariage of a beleeuer that is maried to one that beleeueth not : hereby the vnbeleeuer is kept off from embracing the Gospell , and made the more to dislike and detest it . If a popish or profane husband be maried to a wife that maketh profession of the truth of the Gospell , and she be stout , proud , wanton , waspish , wastefull , or giuen to any other like vices , will he not be ready thereupon to inueigh against the religion she professeth , and vtterly protest against it ? So also a popish or profane wife , if she be maried to such an husband . 3. Negligence in obseruing one anothers disposition or conuersation : whereby it commeth to passe that they keepe not backe , nor restraine one another from running into any sinne : but proue such husbands and wiues one to another as Eli proued a father to his sonnes : whence it fell out , that Gods seuere vengeance fell vpon the necke of the one , and of the other . Pilats wife though an heathenish woman , shall rise vp in iudgement against many such wiues , for she did what she could to keepe her husband from shedding innocent bloud . 4. Acomplement all soothing of one anothers humour , and seeking mutually to please one another in all things , without respect of good or euill . Such as these the Scripture termeth men-pleasers . Hence it commeth to passe that husbands and wiues are so farre from drawing one another from sinne , that the better rather yeelds vnto the worse , and both runne into euill , as Adam was perswaded by his wife to transgresse against Gods expresse charge : and wise Salomon was drawne by his wiues vnto Idolatrie , 1 King. 11. 4. and Sapphira consented to the sacriledge of Ananias her husband , Act. 5. 2. 5. An vndue feare of offending one another by Christian instruction , admonition , reproofe , and the like . Many who are oft moued in conscience to make knowne to their husbands and wiues the sinnes wherein they liue , and the danger wherein they lie by reason thereof , doe notwithstanding through carelesse and causelesse feare , refraine and forbeare to doe so . 6. An impious , and enuious disposition , whereby many husbands and wiues are moued to mocke , and scoffe at that holy zeale , and forwardnesse which they obserue in their bedfellowes : as Michal who resembled Dauid to a foole , or vaine-fellow , because he manifested his zeale by dancing before the Arke . Thus doe many nip the worke of the spirit in the very bud , and cause grace soone to wither . But cursed be that husband , or wife , that thus peruerteth the maine end of their neere coniunction . §. 29. Of husbands and wiues mutuall care ouer one anothers body . After the good of the soule followeth the good of the body , wherein husband and wife must shew their prouident care each ouer other : and doe what lieth in them to procure the well-fare of one anothers person , and to nourish and cherish one anothers body . This dutie the Apostle layeth down vnder the comparison of a body which he calleth flesh , saying , a No man hateth his owne flesh , but nourisheth and cherisheth it : now man and wife are b one flesh . This dutie the Apostle in particular applieth to husbands . At the first institution of mariage it was in particular applied to the wife , whom God made to be c an helpe meet for man : so as it is a mutuall dutie appertaining to both . It seemeth that d Rebecha was so carefull of Isaak in this respect , that she could readily make sauory meat for him , such as he loued . This dutie extendeth it selfe to all estates both of prosperity and aduersity , of health and sicknesse : for so much doe they mutually couenant and promise when they are first ioyned together in mariage , I take thee ( saith each to other ) for better for worse , for richer for poorer , in sicknesse and in health to loue and to cherish . Wherefore they ought mutually both to reioyce in the well-fare of one another , and also in all distresse to succour and comfort each other , putting their shoulders vnder one anothers burden , and helping to ease one another as much as they can . That which Salomon said of a friend and a brother , may fitly be applied in this case to husband and wife , a friend loueth at all times , and a brother is borne for aduersity , that is , a trusty and faithfull friend is constant in his good-will , and ready to performe all duties , of kindnesse at any time , whether it be prosperity or aduersity : the change of outward estate maketh no alteration in his louing affection and friendly cariage : yea he seemeth to be as it were borne and brought forth against the time of trouble and affliction , because then is his prouident care and tender affection most manifested . Of all friends none ought to be more carefull , none more faithfull one to another then man and wife . How then ought they to loue at all times , and if any triall come to either of them , the other so to carrie himselfe , as it may be truly said they were ioyned together for aduersity ? Thus shall they verifie the truth of that whereby God was moued to creare of mankinde male , and female , namely that it was not good for man to be alone , but that it was rather good , that is , needfull , profitable , and comfortable for man and woman to be together . In which respect the wise-man saith , he that findeth a wife findeth a good thing ; and by the rule of relation we may inferre , she that findeth an husband findeth a good thing . §. 30. Of husbands and wiues backwandnesse to helpe one another in time of need . Contrary to this duty is a certaine vnnaturall affection in sundry husbands and wiues , who much grudge to prouide the things that are needfull for one another . The man commonly thinkes the charge too great , the woman thinkes the paines too much : they are affected one to another as if they were meere strangers : nay many strangers will be more ready to performe , and more cheerefull in performing needfull duties ( as occasion is offered ) then such vnnaturall husbands and wiues . If a little sicknesse , or other like crosse fall on one of them , the other thinkes , neuer any had such a burden ; and by their discontent make the burden much more heauy then otherwise it would be : euen as when two oxen are in one yoke , and the one holdeth backe , the draught is made much harder to the other . Thus doe they peruert one of the principall ends of mariage , which is to be a continuall comfort and * helpe each to other , and to ease the burdens of one another : in which respect they are made yoke-fellowes . Iobs wife by her vnnaturall cariage towards him in his affliction did much aggrauate his misery : when he stood in most need of her helpe , she afforded least vnto him : it appeares by Iobs complaint of her , in these words , my breath is strange to my wife , that she altogether neglected him in his misery . The common speech of many after their husband or wife hauing long lien sicke is departed , bewrayeth their vnnaturall affection : their speech is this , if my husband ( or wife ) had died so much sooner I had saued so much mony . What doth this intimate but that they could haue beene contented their husband ( or wife ) should haue died sooner that they might haue spared the more . §. 31. Of Husbands and Wiues mutuall respect of one anothers good name . The prouident care of husbands and wiues ought further to extend it selfe to the credit and good name of one another . As deare ought the good name of the wife be vnto the husband , and of the husband to the wife , as their owne . a The great regard that Ioseph had of the credit of Marie his espoused wife , made him thinke of putting her away priuily when ●e obserued her to be with childe and knew not of whom : ●or he was not willing b to make her a publike example . The ●ame respect moued c Bethsheba to send secretly to Dauid , and ●ell him that she was with childe . The commendation which he good husband ( noted by Salomon ) giueth of his wife being approued by the holy Ghost , sheweth how man and wife ●●aght in that respect to honour each other : and that on good ●ounds . For 1. A good name is a most pretious thing : e better then pre●ious ointment , which giueth a sweet sauour , and f to be chosen ●oue great riches . 2. So neerely are husbands and wiues ioyned together , the good name of the one cannot but tend to the honour and credit of the other ; so that herein they seeke their owne honour also . §. 32. Of husbands and wiues preuenting each others discredit . For direction herein , consider we how this dutie may be performed , and how it may be manifested . For the better performing of it , care must be had both to preuent and redresse an ill name , and also to procure and preserue a goodname . To preuent an ill name respect must be had of these three things following , 1. What one relateth of another , and how . 2. What eare they giue to things related by others . 3. What censure they giue of one another . For the first , husbands and wiues may in no case delight to discouer vnto others , and spread abroad the infirmities , and imperfections of one another , or any thing that may tend to the discredit of either of them : but rather couer and conceale them as much as they may with a good conscience . It is expressed that g Ioseph being a iust man laboured to conceale that blemish which he imagined to be in his wife , so as this may stand with iustice : yea also it is a part of Ioue , for h loue couereth a multitude of sinnes . For the second , husbands and wiues must not haue their eares wide opened to heare euery tale and report that shall be brought to one against the other , but rather shew themselues displeased and offended with them that are ready to relate things of euill report . If an husband or wife manifest a willingnesse to hearken after tales and reports of one another , the deuill will stirre vp instruments enow to fill their heads with tales , and those for the most part both friuolous and forged : not only strangers , but children , seruants , and they which are of the same family will euer be telling some tale or other , to currie fauour , as we speake . But an vtter dislike of such flattering tale-bearers , will take away occasion from them of telling vntrue , or slight reports . For the third , the iudgement and censure which husbands and wiues giue one of another must either be very charitable , or verie sparing . If one heare reported any notorious crime of the other , they may not be ouer-headie or hastie to iudge and condemne , no though they thinke they see some euidence thereof , but rather suspend their iudgement . This seemeth to be the minde of Ioseph : though he obserued Marie to be with childe , yet would he not presently iudge her to be a notorious adulteresse , or condemne her for an hypocrite , vnworthie to liue , and therefore would not make her a publike example . In briefe , that husbands and wiues may be the more sparing in censuring one another , they must not rashly beleeue any euill report of one another , but rather suppresse all light suspitions as much as they can . That the iudgement which they giue one of another , may be charitable , in iudging they must well obserue the properties of loue , which are 1. To interpret doubtfull things in the better part . 2. To mitigate , so farre as truth and iustice will suffer , the faults which are euident . Michal offended against the first in an high degree , and was cursed . Abigail obserued the latter , and was blessed . §. 33. Of the wisdome of husbands and wiues , in redressing one anothers ill name . To redresse an ill name , husbands and wiues must first giue one another notice of the report that goeth of them , and endeuour to worke in them both a sight , and also a sense of those euils which are in the mouths of others : after notice giuen , they must labour to bring them to repentance of those sinnes , for which they are ill reported of , and to a manifestation of repentance , by doing things meet for repentance , which is by a zealous and conscionable practise of such vettues as are cleane contrarie to the vices for which they were euill spoken of . It may with good probabilitie be gathered out of the historie of the Leuite , whose wife plaid the whore , that thus he dealt with her . And thus Abigail endeuoured to deale with her husband . §. 34. Of husbands and wiues care in procuring one anothers good name . To procure a good report , husbands and wiues must First , take notice of the good qualities which are in one another , and as one hath occasion to speake of the other , to make those good qualities the subiect of their speech : as we heard it before commended in the husband of that wife which is described by Salomon . Secondly , they must lend a willing and ioyfull eare to such as shall ( so farre as they can conceiue ) truly and vnfainedly , without flatterie or hypocrisie , speake any thing in commendation of the one or of the other : not thinking themselues dispraised ( which is the conceit of many ) when their bed-fellow is praised : but rather hauing their hearts the more enlarged to praise God , for bestowing on them such an excellent token and pledge of his fauour . Thirdly , they must imitate those good things which they behold , or heare to be in one another , and so imitate them as they which haue before time knowne both husband and wife , may say , this she learned of him , or this he learned of her . §. 35. Of husbands and wiues wisdome , in preseruing each others good name . To preserue a good name , it will be meet for an husband or wife , wisely and seasonably to giue one another notice of that good fame which is raised of them , thereby to prouoke them both to giue glorie to God for the same ( m as the Apostle thanketh God for that report which was spred abroad of the faith and loue of the Colossians ) and also to walke worthie of that good report ( as the Apostle who had giuen a great testimony of the bountie of the Corinthians , earnestly exhorteth them to finish their beneuolence , lest ( saith he ) I should be ashamed in this my constant boasting . ) For if they of whom there is once a good report raised , decay , wax cold , grow backward , or fall into notorious and scandalous sinnes , they will cleane extinguish and put out their good name among men , and turne it into an euill report , according to that which Salomon saith , Dead flies cause the ointment of the Apothecarie to sendforth a stinking sauour : so doth a little folly him that is in reputation for wisdome and honour . §. 36. Of husbands and wiues like affection towards one anothers credit . In the last place , to manifest a mutuall prouident care of one anothers good name , husbands and wiues must be so affected with the report that goeth of either of them , as if the report were of their owne selues . If the report be good , to be glad thereof , and to reioyce thereat ; if it be euill , to be grieued , and after an holy manner vexed at it : thus shall they shew a true sympathie and fellow feeling of one anothers credit , according to that generall rule of the Apostle , n Reioyce with them that reioyce , and weepe with them that weepe . §. 37. Of the vices contrarie to that mutuallcare , which man and wife should haue of one anothers credit . Vices contrarie to these duties concerning the good name of an husband and wife , are in generall two . One is a readinesse to disgrace and discredit one another , like Michal the wife of Dauid , of whom we heard before . A hatefull and detestable vice this is , which cannot stand with true matrimoniall loue , but rather argueth an vtter dislike , and a plaine hatred of one another . Husbands and wiues discredit one another , either by procuring an ill name , or hindring a good name . An ill name in procured by these meanes following . 1. By blazing abroad one anothers infirmities : as when tatling Gossips meet , their vsuall pra●e is about their husbands , complaining of some vice or other in them : My husband , saith one , is couetous : I cannot get of him any thing almost : he maketh me goe as no body goeth . And my husband , replieth another , is so furious as none can tell how to speake to him : so one after another goeth on in this tracke , some discouering such infirmities as should be concealed ; others ( which is worse ) plainly belying their husbands . In like manner also husbands when they meet with their boone companions , make their wiues the common subiect of all their talke : one accusing his wife of one vice ; another his , of another . There are two respects for which this vice ( most detestable in it selfe ) is made more odious in an husband or a wife . 1. Because they know more then any other of one anothers infirmities : so as if they be so euilly minded , they may much more discredit one another , then any other can . 2. Because in regard of their neere vnion they are most bound to conceale and couer each others imperfections . p Cam was cursed for reuealing his fathers nakednesse . but a more horrible curse doe husbands and wiues deserue , that so doe . 2. By opening their eares , and giuing credit to euery light report that any shall raise . More secret heart-burning of one against the other , and more open quarrels and contentions betwixt them , ordinarily arise from hence then from any other thing . 3. By peruerting and mis-interpreting one anothers actions , words , yea and thoughts also : taking euery thing in the worst part . 4. By concealing from one another the common euill rumors which are raised of them , and are in euery mans mouth : of all other , bedfellowes are most fit to disclose such things one to another : and most bound to doe it . Most fit , because of their mutuall familiaritie : most bound , because of their neere vnion . Many husbands and wiues doe hinder one anothers good name by enuying one at the good report that is made of the other , and gainsaying the same : as if the credit of the one must needs turne to the discredit of the other . Thus as water quencheth hot iron , so this enuious disposition is a meanes to extinguish the heat of fame , and to put out the glorious light of a good name . Whereby as they impaire the credit and honour of one another , so they monstrously discredit and dishonour themselues . The other generall vice in this kinde , is a carelesse regard , or plaine neglect of one anothers fame : when the husband is no way affected with any report that goeth of his wife , nor the wife with any of the husband : but as if they were meere strangers one to another , they passe by all reports made of one another . What mutuall loue can there be in such ? howsoeuer their hands haue beene ioyned together , surely their hearts were neuer vnited , so as it had beene better they had neuer knowne one another , vnlesse the Lord doe afterwards knit their hearts , and vnite their affections more neerely and firmely together . §. 38. Of husbands and wiues mutuall prouidence about the goods of the family . Yet there remaineth one thing more , whereabout husbands and wiues ought to manifest a mutuall prouident care each ouer other : and that is about the goods of this world . Howsoeuer the husband , while he liueth with his wife , hath the truest propertie in them , and the greatest title vnto them , yet I referre this to those mutuall duties which man and wife owe each to other , in three respects . First , because in conscience they appertaine to the vse of the wife , as well as of the husband . Secondly , because the wife is by Gods prouidence appointed a ioynt gouernour with the husband of the familie , and in that respect ought to be an helpe in prouiding such a sufficiencie of the goods of this world , as are needfull for that estate wherein God hath set them , and for that charge which God hath committed to them . Thirdly , because the wife , if she suruiue the husband , ought to haue such a portion of those goods , as are meet for her place and charge . In these respects we see it requisite , yea a bounden dutie , that husband and wife , euen in a mutuall regard one of another , be as prouident as they can be with a good conscience in getting , keeping , and disposing competent goods and riches for the mutuall good one of another . Concerning the husbands dutie in this respect no question is made : the practise of all good husbands mentioned in Scripture , the care of prouiding for their a owne enioyned to them , their place and office to be their wiues head , with many other like arguments , whereof we shall more distinctly speake , when we come to declare the particular duties of husbands , doe proue as much . The greatest question is concerning the wife , whether she be bound to take any care about the goods . But if the Scripture be tho●owly searched , we shall finde proofe enough to shew that euen ●he also is bound hereunto . For first , the generall end which God aimed at in making the woman ( namely to be b helpe●o ●o man ) implieth as much : for herein may she be a verie great helpe , as we shall see by and by in sundry particulars . 2. That generall property attributed to a wife to be c a good thing , confirmeth as much : for that which is profitable is called good : and it is one respect wherein a wife is termed a good thing , that she may by her prouidence and diligence bring much profit to her husband : and therefore in this , among other respects , the good wife which Salomon describeth , is said d to doe good to her husband all the daies of her life : for by her industry and prouidence shee did so preserue and increase his goods , that e the heart of her husband trusted in her , and he had no need of spoile . If the particular actions whereby that good wife is described be well noted , we may easily obserue that she was an especiall helpe vnto her husband , euen in his outward estate . From all which , we may inferre these two points . First , that this prouident care about outward temporall goods is lawfull , not vnbeseeming a Christian man or woman . Secondly , that it is a mutuall dutie appertaining both to husband and wife . For the first , how needfull the goods of this world are for preseruation of life and health , estate of the family , good of Church and Common-wealth , releefe of the poore , with the like vses , no man can be ignorant . God hath giuen them as blessings to his children , and that often times in great abundance ; and his children haue accordingly beene thankfull for them : so as a prouident care about them is not vnlawfull , but very expedient and needfull . For the second , If there should not be a ioint care herein , the care and paines of the one might be altogether in vaine . For suppose an husband be industrious , as f Iaakob was , and get much abroad , if the wife either by her vnthriftinesse , idlenesse , negligence , or the like vices , suffer that which is brought home to be embeaseled and wasted ; or by her prodigalitie , brauerie , or loue of vaine companie , consume it her selfe , where will be the profit of the husbands paines ? Or on the other side , if a wife should be as painfull and prosperous in getting , as g the good houswife before mentioned was , and the husband by carding , dicing , drinking , reuelling , or other like meanes should waste all away , what fruit would remaine of the wiues prouidence ? In this mutuall prouident care of husband and wife , each of them must haue an eye to their owne place : affaires abroad doe most appertaine to the man , and are especially to be ordered by him : that which the wife is especially to care for , is the businesse of the house : for the Apostle laieth it downe as a rule for wiues ( as we shall hereafter more particularly declare ) that they h keepe at home , and i gouerne the house . By this means may they be very profitable each to other . §. 39. Of the vices contrary to the good prouidence of husband and wife , about the goods of the family . Contrary to that dutie , are these vices following . 1. Couetousnesse , and ouermuch care for themselues : as when an husband so raketh , and scrapeth , and hoordeth vp for himselfe , as he neither affordeth vnto his wife so much as is meet for her place while he liueth with her , nor thinketh of prouiding sufficient maintenance for her , if shee ouer-liue him , but rather thinketh how to defraud her of that which the law casteth vpon her . Or when a wife secretly hoordeth vp whatsoeuer she can get , either by her owne industry , or else by purloining from her husband : sometimes selling corne , wares , houshold-stuffe , or other like commodities , so priuily as the husband shall neuer know it : sometimes taking money out of his counter , box , bagge , chest , or the like , so as either it shall not be missed , or if it be , it shall not be knowne who had it . Many there be who in mistrust of their husbands prouidence , or in dislike of them , or on some other by-respects , commit whatsoeuer they can get to the trust and custody of others , whereby it oft commeth to passe , that they themselues , meeting with deceitfull friends , are vtterly defeated , euen because they dare not make their fraud knowne . As Couetousnesse is in it selfe an odious sinne ; so it is made much more hainous by defrauding husband or wife , who ought to be as deare each to other as themselues . 2. Prodigalitie , and too lauish spending vpon themselues , and those things which are most agreeable to their owne corrupt humor : as when husbands without any meane or mea●ure , spend their goods abroad in hunting , hauking , carding , ●icing , eating , drinking , or the like , and suffer their wiues to want at home , and yet tooke their wiues to maintaine them , and therefore had their portion . Or when wiues bring their husbands into debt , and weaken , if not cleane ouerthrow their estate , by gorgeous decking and adorning their houses , by braue and costly apparell , by dainty fare , by gossipping abroad , with the like . Many wiues are so violent herein , that if their desire and humour be not satisfied , their husbands shall haue no rest ( forsooth they brought a portion , and maintained they must and will be ; it skilleth not whether their husbands estate can beare it or no ) in so much as many are forced wittingly , for quietnesse sake , to suffer their estate to sinke . O foolish and wretched wiues ! how little do they consider that they were maried to doe their husbands good , and not euill all the daies of their life ? is this to be an helpe to man ? or rather is it not cleane to thwart Gods counsell , and peruert his purpose ? can we thinke that God will forbeare , and not be auenged of them ? yet much more will God be auenged of the forenamed husbands , because of that image of himselfe which he hath placed in them , and because of that place and authority wherein he hath set them . The Apostle expresly saith of them , that they are worse then Infidels , which being so , they must looke for the greater iudgement . 3. Idlenesse , and a carelesse neglect of their estate . Many men spend day after day , like a bird that flieth vp and downe , as it falleth out , from tree to tree , from twigge to twigge : they goe from place to place , but know not for what end : as they meet with any company , so they abide as long as the company tarrieth , and then seeke after other company , and are ready to goe with any to Ale-house , Tauerne , Play-house , Bowling-alley , or other like places . Many women also spend all the forenoone in lying a bed and tyring themselues , and the afternoone as occasion is offered in sitting idly at home , or walking forth to little purpose , but only to weare out time , little regarding their husbands estate , whether it increase , or diminish . Thus by the idlenesse and carelesnesse of husband and wife , come faire estates many times to ruine , and both of then brought to penury and beggery . §. 40. Of husbands and wiues ioint care in gouerning the family . Hitherto I haue deliuered such common duties as mutually respect the husband and wife , and are to be performed of each to other . There are other common duties which they are both iointly bound to performe to other persons : and those either members of the family , or strangers comming to the family . Concerning the members of the family , though there be some peculiar duties belonging to the master , and some to the mistresse , some to the father , and some to the mother , of which we shall speake in their due place ; yet in generall the gouernment of the family , and the seuerall members thereof belongeth to the husband and wife both ( if at least they haue a family ) and a ioint common dutie it is to be helpfull one to another therein . Obiect . Seeing it is not necessarily required , that a husband and wife should haue a family to gouerne , for two may be maried and haue neither children nor seruants ( as many are ) and yet be true husband and wife ; why is this care of a family ranked among the duties of husband and wife ? Answ . 1. Because ordinarily when two are maried they gather a family , and are the gouernours thereof : so as though it faile in some particulars , yet for the most part it holdeth . 2. Because the ioint gouernment whereof I speake in this place is by vertue of the mariage-bond : for if a man and a woman should liue together in an house , and by mutuall consent haue a ioint authority and gouernment , this would be very offensiue to all that should know it , or heare of it : neither were they by any ordinance of God bound to be so helpfull one to another as husband and wife : nor the members of a family so bound to subiect themselues to both . 3. The duty whereof I speake , though it be about the gouernment of a family , yet hath it respect to an husband as he is an husband , and to a wife as shee is a wife ; namely , that by vertue of their mariage-bond , and neere vnion , they be helpfull one to another in well-ordering the things of the family . Whether the man ought to look to the good gouernment of his house is a question without all question . He is the highest in the family , and hath both authoritie ouer all , and the charge of all is committed to his charge : he is as a king in his owne house : as a king is to see that land well gouerned where he is king , so he that is the chiefe ruler in an house . The dutie which the Apostle applieth in particular to Bishops & Deacons , in generall appertaineth to all husbands , a that they rule their owne house honestly : and againe , b that they be such as can rule their children well , and their owne housholds . The care of many husbands is in this respect commended in Scripture , as of c Abram , of d Iaakob , of e Iosuah , of f Dauid , the g Ruler at Galile , and of many other . That the wife also ought to be an helpe to him therein , is very euident : for the Apostle layeth it expresly to their charge , h that they gouerne the house : would the Wise man haue so highly commended a wife i for well gouerning her husbands house if it had not appertained to her ? It is very likely that wise Abigail had a great hand in gouerning Nabals house , because the seruants made complaint to her of Nabals churlishnesse , and because she had the seruants at command , readily to doe what she would haue them ; yea also , because she could so readily prepare such store of prouision for Dauid and his men , as she did . Hence is it that the wife is called k mistresse of the house , as well as the husband l master of the house . Obiect . m A woman is not to teach , nor to vsurpe authoritie ouer the man. Answ . 1. That branch of teaching hath respect to publike assemblies , and Churches , in which she may not teach : but not to priuate families , in which she may , and ought to teach : for n Barthshebah taught Salomon . When o Apollos was brought to the house of Aquila , Priscilla the wife of Aquila did helpe to expound to Apollos the way of God more perfectly . 2. The other branch concerning authoritie , hath not reference to the inferiour members in the family , ouer which the wife of an houshold gouernour hath authoritie , but only to the husband , ouer whom if she take any authoritie , she vsurpeth it . Therfore neither this place of Scripture , nor any other doth exclude the wife , being iointly considered with the husband , to rule & gouerne those in the family which are vnder them both . 2. Obiect . This ioint gouernment of the wife doth much impaire the dignity and authority of the husband . Answ . Nothing lesse : for she is subordinate to her husband , and must so rule others as she be subiect to her husband , and not command any thing against his command , ( prouided that his command be not against the Lord , and his word . ) We see that in all estates the king or highest gouernour hath other Magistrates vnder him , who haue a command ouer the subiects , and yet thereby the kings supreme authoritie is no whit impaired , but rather the better established , and he the more honoured . So is it in a family . Let therefore husbands and wiues herein assist one another , for so they may be very helpfull one to another , and bring , by their mutuall helpe in gouerning , much good to the family . The husband by his helpe aiding his wife , addeth much authoritie vnto her , and so causeth that she is not despised , nor lightly esteemed . The wife by her helpe causeth many things to be espied , and so redressed , which otherwise might neuer haue beene found out : for two eies see more then one , especially when one of those is more at hand , and in presence , as the wife is in the house . Besides there are many things in well gouerning a family more fit for one to meddle withall then for the other : as for the husband to meddle with the great and weightie affaires of the family ( as performing Gods worship , appointing and setling good orders , prouiding conuenient house-roome , and other necessaries for the family : keeping children when they grow great , or waxe stubborne , in awe : ruling men seruants , with the like ) And for the wife to meddle with some lesse , but very needfull matters , as nourishing and instructing children when they are young , adorning the house , ordering the prouision brought into the house , ruling maid seruants , with the like . Yea further , as the man especially is to performe the very actions of prayer , reading the word , catechizing , and other like duties in the family , so the wife may be a great helpe in putting her husband in minde both of the dutie it selfe , and of the time of performing it , and incouraging him to doe it , in gathering the family together , and exhorting them to be forward , in making her selfe an example to the rest by her diligent and reuerend attention , in oft vrging and pressing to her children and seruants such points of instruction as her husband hath taught ; yea , in praying , reading , teaching , and performing like exercises her selfe , so farre as she is able , when her husband is absent , or negligent and carelesse , and will not himselfe doe them ; or it may be , is not able to doe them : or if she performe them not her selfe , in getting some other to performe them . §. 41. Of the vices contrary to a ioint care of gouerning the family . The minde and practise of many , both husbands and wiues , is contrary to this dutie . Many a husband because the wiues office is especially to abide at home , will put off all gouernment to the wife : leauing it to her not only to order the things in the house , but also to bring in all needful things , to order and gouerne the children both young and old , yea euen to prouide for them also , to take in , to put out , to vse all sorts of seruants as pleaseth her : yea , if seruants shall be stubborne and stout against her , he will take no notice of it , nor endure to be told of it , much lesse afford her his assistance , but suffer her to be disgraced and despised . As for religious duties , he will no way meddle with them . Oh base minded men , vnworthy to be husbands and heads of wiues ! shall your wiues who were made to be an helpe to you , haue no helpe from you , ●o not in those things which especially belong to your charge ? shall the weaker vessels beare all the burden ? Assuredly as the man carrieth away the greatest reputation and honour when a family is well gouerned ( though it be by the ioynt care and wisdome of his wife ) so lieth he most open to the iudgement of God if the gouernment thereof be neglected , and through the neglect thereof , children and seruants grow impious : instance a Elie , and b Dauid . For as in a common-wealth , the greatest honour of good gouernment , victorious battels , happy peace , and prosperity , and the greatest dishonor and dammage of the contrary , redoundeth to the king , so to the man who is chiefe gouernour in a family : for it is presupposed , that all which doe any good are instruments of the highest gouernour : if any euill or mischiefe fall out , that it is through his negligence . On the other side , because the husband is the most principall , many wiues thinke that the gouernment of the family nothing at all appertaines to them , and thereupon are carelesse of the good thereof , and will not stirre their least finger to order any thing aright : but , if any thing be amisse , lay all the blame on their husbands . Doe not such peruert that maine end for which God made them , euen to be an helpe ? Doe they not carrie themselues most vnworthy of the place wherein God hath set them , namely to be ioynt-gouernours with their husbands , and partakers of their dignities ? As by their negligence they make themselues accessary to all the euill which falleth out in the family , so assuredly shall they haue their part in those iudgements which are executed on the head thereof . Most contrary to the forenamed dutie is the practise of such as are hindrances one to another in gouerning the family : as when wiues are not only negligent themselues in comming to religious exercises , but keepe backe children and seruants , and so are a great griefe vnto their religious husbands : or when they vse any of the children or seruants to be instruments of iniquity ; or are themselues disquiet and troublesome in the house , like to her of whom Salomon speaketh in this prouerbe , It is better to dwell in the corner of the house top , then with a contentious woman in a wide house . Husbands also are oft an hinderance to that good gouernment which their wiues would helpe forward , when they scoffe and scorne at that good counsell which their wiues giue them for that purpose , or when they will not suffer their wiues to meddle with any thing at all , nor endure that they should finde any fault , much lesse take in hand to redresse any thing that is amisse . These and such like peruerse dispositions are in husbands and wiues , whereby it commeth to passe that they who were ioyned together to be a mutuall helpe each to other , proue heauy , yea intolerable burdens . §. 42. Of husbands and wiues mutuall helpe in hospitality . The next common duty of husband and wife respecteth such as come to their house , but are no particular members thereof , whether they be kindred , alliance , acquaintance , or strangers , especially if they be Saints , to whom a hospitality , that is , a kinde and courteous entertainment , is due . Herein therefore must husbands and wiues be helpfull one to another : for as it is required of b husbands , so also of c wiues to be harborous , namely while they are maried , together with their husbands , and when they are widowes , of themselues . d Abraham and Sarah were herein an helpe one to another , when the three Angels in shapes of men came to their house : so were e the Shunemite and her husband when Elisha the Prophet came to their house . For hospitality , that it is a commendable dutie belonging to such as are house-keepers and able to giue entertainment , is euident by the precepts and examples before specified , as also by the blessing which God thereupon hath brought to the houses of them that were giuen thereunto , which the Apostle intimateth in these words , f thereby some haue entertained Angels vnawares . Now therfore husbands and wiues being ( as we haue heard ) ioynt gouernours , as in other things , so in this they ought to lend an helping hand each to other , and that for these reasons . 1. Because in giuing entertainment there are sundry things to be done , whereof some are proper to the husbands place , and some to the wiues . To take order for the prouision of things without doores is more fit for the husband , g Abraham did it : to order the smaller things within doores is more fit for the wife ; that was left to h Sarah . 2. Because it is meet that guests should know they are welcome both to the husband and to the wife , that so they may be the more cheerefull . 3. Because a mutuall consent , and cheerefull help herein will be an especiall means , as to manifest their mutuall affection , so to hold the hearts of man and wife firme and close together , and make them the better like and loue one the other : especially if the husband shall shew himselfe as ready and willing to entertaine his wiues friends and kindred as his owne , and so the wife her husbands ( as they ought . ) For as they themselues are made one flesh , so ought each of them to esteeme of the others friends as of their owne . 4. Because thus they shew a mutuall desire of bringing Gods blessing on each other , and vpon their whole family . §. 43. Of vices contrary to mutuall helpe in hospitality . Contrary to this dutie is for the most part couetousnesse in the husband , and lasinesse in the wife . The man , because the charge of the family lieth on him , distrustfully feareth lest he should want for his owne . I denie not but that a prouident care for our owne , & namely for them of the family , is needfull and commendable , i he that prouideth not for them is worse then an infidell : so as a man may be ouerlauish in giuing entertainment , if he goe beyond his meanes , impouerish his estate , and disable himselfe to prouide for his owne , as many doe : yet when a man hath sufficient , yea and abundance , when there is no iust cause , but meerely vpon an vndue feare too carkingly , and distrustfully to pinch , and grudge to giue entertaiment to any , is vnbeseeming a Christian , yea also to be worse then an infidell ; not worthy to haue an house , or any thing fit for entertainment ; no nor worthy of common society . The woman on the other side grudgeth at the paines she must take , and trouble she must vndergoe about entertaining guests , and thereupon is loth that any at any time should come to their house . Concerning a wife , I denie not but that an husband may be in this kinde ouerburdensome to her , by being too ioueall , as they speake , and bringing guests too often into the house , especially if they be guests of no good name ; and by that meanes make her euen weary of her life : but yet for a wife to refuse all paines in that kinde , and to be discontented when her husband inuites any friends , or when any come ( as the three Angels did to Abraham ) vnawares , argueth not a louing affection , nor a wiuelike subiection vnto her husband , to be in her . These faults are so much the greater when the husband , or wife , are free and forward in entertaining their owne kindred and friends : but are backward , and grudge at the entertainment of each others friends and kindred . Hence commonly ariseth much heart-burning of one against the other : yea much iarre and contention betwixt them : and from dislike of the practise of one another in this kinde oft followeth a dislike of one anothers person : so that as the fault is bad in it selfe , it proues to be much worse in the mischiefes that follow vpon it . §. 44. Of husbands and wiues mutuall helpe in releeuing the poore . The last common and ioynt dutie wherein husband and wife ought to be helpfull each to other , respecteth those that are without the house , namely the poore , and such as stand in need of their helpe , who are to be releeued and succoured . Because man and wife vsually meale together , and are ioynt partakers of Gods good creatures , they must put one another in minde of that precept of charity which was giuen to the Iewes when they were at their meales , a send part vnto them for whom none is prouided . The good wife which is set forth by the holy Ghost for a patterne and example vnto others to follow , together with her husband , are noted to be helpfull one to another in this dutie : for she is said b to stretch out her hand to the poore , and to the needy : and he is said c to praise her , thereby incouraging her to hold on in doing those good things which she did . What liberty the wife hath , or howfar forth she may be restrained in case her husband vtterly refuse to giue consent , we shall * hereafter declare in the particular duties of wiues : the point here noted is , that both the husband himselfe must according to his abilitie be bountifull to the poore , and suffer his wife , yea prouoke her so to be , and withall allow her wherewithall to be bountifull : and that the wife also must stirre vp her husband to liberalitie in this respect , and her selfe open her hand to the poore in the things which lawfully she may giue . There is nothing wherby a man or wife can bring more profit to the house , then by giuing to the poore : that which is giuen to the poore is e lent to the Lord , and he will repay it with great increase : it is as f seed , which being liberally sowen , will bring forth a plentifull haruest : yea , it is a meanes to make vs g friends , to speake a good word for vs at the barre of Christs iudgement seat : and it bringeth not only the h blessing of men , but i of God also , euen the greatest blessing of all , the k blessing of eternall life : for it is l a sacrifice with which God is well pleased . The Apostle noteth this to be one of Christs oracles , which by word of mouth he left vnto his Disciples , m It is more blessed to giue then to receiue . Besides , husbands and wiues in distributing almes , may receiue good direction one from another : the husband by telling the wife who are fit to be releeued ( for commonly husbands better know those which are abroad out of the family ) the wife by telling the husband what things are fittest to be giuen away : for wiues commonly know of what things there is greatest store , and what may in the house be best spared . §. 45. Of husbands and wiues vnmercifulnesse to the poore . Contrarie is the vnmercifulnesse of many husbands , who are not only hard-hearted themselues ( neuer giuing any thing vnlesse by the law of the land they be forced , & then they part with that which is giuen , so grudgingly , as it is nothing at all acceptable to God ( for n God loueth a cheerfull giuer ) but also tie their wiues hands , and suffer them to giue nothing . Wherein they bring both the cry of the poore , and also the groanes and griefe of a mercifull wife who is thus restrained , vpon their owne necks , and aggrauate their sinne in an high degree . On the other side , the vnmercifulnesse of many wiues is also contrarie to the forenamed dutie : for there are many , who though they haue libertie to giue of the common goods , and also allowance of their owne out of which they may giue , yet couetously hoord vp all they can get , giue not a pennies worth , out rather suffer victuals and other things to perish in the house , and when they are naught to fling them away , then that any thing whilst it is good should be giuen out of the house . Shall not the creatures which are spoiled in an house , and the poore that haue wanted , make a loud crie in the eares of the Lord against them ? Yea further , many wiues are grieued at their husbands bountie , and still mouing him to shut his hand , and giue no more . Are they not plaine deuils herein , opposing against that which is good ? The third Treatise . Of wiues particular duties . §. 1. Of the generall heads of this treatise . EPHES. 5. 22. Wiues submit your selues vnto your owne husbands as vnto the Lord. Vers . 23. For the husband is the head of the wife , euen as Christ is the head of the Church : and he is the Sauiour of the bodie . Vers . 24. Therefore as the Church is subject to Christ , so let wiues be subiect to their husbands in euerie thing . IN the particular declaration of wiues duties , the Apostle noteth two points , 1. The dutie required . 2. The reason to enforce it . In setting forth the dutie , he declareth 1. The matter wherin it consisteth . 2. The manner how it is to be performed . In the matter we may note , 1. The thing required , a subiection . 2. The person whom it respecteth , their b owne husbands . The manner respecteth , 1. The qualitie of that subiection . 2. The extent     To declare the qualitie of wiues subiection to their husbands , two rules are set downe . 1. That it be such a subiection , as c should be performed to Christ . 2. That it be such a subiection as the d Church performeth vnto Christ . The extent of wiues subiection doth stretch it selfe verie farre , euen to e all things . The reason to enforce all these points is taken from that place of eminencie and authoritie , wherein the husband is set aboue his wife : which is , 1. Propounded vnder the metaphor of an head ( for the husband is the head of the wife . ) 2. Amplified by that resemblance which therein he hath vnto Christ . In which resemblance two points are noted . 1. That the husband , by vertue of his place , carrieth the verie image of Christ ( euen as Christ is the head of the Church . ) 2. That the husband by vertue of his office is a protector of his wife ( and he is the sauiour of the body . ) §. 2. Of a wiues * subiection in generall . The first point to be handled in the treatise of wiues particular duties is the generall matter of all ( Subiection ) vnder which all other particulars are comprised , for it hath as large an extent as that Honour which is required in the first commandement , being applied to wiues . When first the Lord declared vnto woman her dutie , he set it downe vnder this phrase , Thy desire shall be subiect to thine husband , Gen. 3. 16. Obiect . That was a punishment inflicted on her for her transgression ? Answ . And a law too , for triall of her obedience , which if it be not obserued , her nature will be more depraued , and her fault more increased . Besides , we cannot but thinke that the woman was made before the fall , that the man might rule ouer her . Vpon this ground the Prophets and Apostles haue oft vrged the same . Sarah is commended for this , that she was subiect to her husband ( 1. Pet. 3. 6. ) Hereby the holy Ghost would teach wiues , that Subiection ought to be as salt to season euery dutie which they performe to their husband . Their very opinion , affection , speech , action , and all that concerneth the husband , must sauour of subiection . Contrary is the disposition of many wiues , whom ambition hath tainted and corrupted within and without : they cannot endure to heare of subiection : they imagine that they are made slaues thereby . But I hope partly by that which hath beene before deliuered concerning those common duties which man and wife doe mutually owe each to other , and partly by the particulars which vnder this generall are comprised , but most especially by the duties which the husband in particular oweth to his wife , it will euidently appeare , that this subiection is no seruitude . But were it more then it is , seeing God requireth subiection of a wife to her husband , the wife is bound to yeeld it . And good reason it is that she who first drew man into sin , should be now subiect to him , lest by the like womanish weaknesse she fall againe . §. 3. Of an husbands * superioritie ouer a wife , to be acknowledged by a wife . The subiection which is required of a wife to her husband implieth two things . 1. That she acknowledge her husband to be her superiour . 2. That she respect him as her superiour . That acknowledgement of the husbands superioritie is twofold , 1. Generall of any husband . 2. Particular of her owne husband .   The generall is the ground of the particular : for till a wife be informed that an husband , by vertue of his place , is his wiues superiour , she will not be perswaded that her owne husband is aboue her , or hath any authoritie ouer her . First therefore concerning the generall , I will lay downe some euident and vndeniable proofes , to shew that an husband is his wiues superiour , and hath authoritie ouer her . The proofes are these following . 1. God of whom , b the powers that be ordained , are , hath power to place his Image in whom he will , and to whom God giueth superioritie and authority , the same ought to be acknowledged to be due vnto them . But God said of the man to the woman , he shall rule ouer thee , ( Gen. 3. 16. ) 2. Nature hath placed an eminencie in the male ouer the female : so as where they are linked together in one yoake , it is giuen by nature that he should gouerne , she obey . This did the heathen by light of nature obserue . 3. The titles and names , whereby an husband is set forth , doe implie a superiority and authority in him , as c Lord , ( 1 Pet. 3. 6. ) d Master , ( Est . 1. 17. ) e Guide , ( Prou. 2. 17. ) f Head , ( 1 Cor. 11. 3. ) g Image and glory of God , ( 1 Cor. 11. 7. ) 4. The persons whom the husband by vertue of his place , and whom the wife by vertue of her place , represent , most euidently proue as much : for an husband representeth Christ , and a wife , the Church , ( Eph. 5. 23. ) 5. The circumstances noted by the holy Ghost at the womans creation implie no lesse , as that she was created after man , for mans good , and out of mans side , ( Gen. 2. 18 , &c. ) 6. The very h attire which nature and custome of all times and places haue taught women to put on , confirmeth the same : as long haire , vailes , and other couerings ouer the head : this and the former argument doth the Apostle himselfe vse to this very purpose , 1 Cor. 11. 7 , &c. The point then being so cleere , wiues ought in conscience to acknowledge as much : namely that an husband hath superiority and authoritie ouer a wife . The acknowledgement hereof is a maine and principall dutie , and a ground of all other duties . Till a wife be fully instructed therein and truly perswaded thereof , no dutie can be performed by her as it ought : for subiection hath relation to superioritie and authoritie . The very notation of the word implieth as much . How then can subiection be yeelded , if husbands be not acknowledged superiors ? It may be forced , as one King conquered in battell by another , may be compelled to yeeld homage to the conqueror , but yet because he still thinketh with himselfe , that he is no whit inferiour , he will hardly be brought willingly to yeeld a subiects dutie to him , but rather expect a time when he may free himselfe and take reuenge of the conqueror . §. 4. Of a fond conceit , that husband and wife are equall . Contrary to the forenamed subiection is the opinion of many wiues , who thinke themselues euery way as good as their husbands , and no way inferiour to them . The reason whereof seemeth to be that small inequalitie which is betwixt the husband and the wife : for of all degrees wherein there is any difference betwixt person and person , there is the least disparitie betwixt man and wife . Though the man be as the head , yet is the woman as the heart , which is the most excellent part of the body next the head , farre more excellent then any other member vnder the head , and almost equall to the head in many respects , and as necessary as the head . As an euidence , that a wife is to man as the heart to the head , she was at her b first creation taken out of the side of man where his heart lieth ; and though the woman was at first c of the man created out of his side , yet is the man also by the woman . Euer since the first creation man hath beene borne and brought forth out of the womans wombe : so as neither the man is without the woman , nor the woman without the man : yea , as d the wife hath not power of her owne body , but the husband , so the husband hath not power of his owne body , but the wife . They are also e heires together of the grace of life . Besides , wiues are mothers of the same children , whereof their husbands are fathers ( for God said to both , f multiplie and increase ) and mistresses of the same seruants whereof they are masters ( for Sarah is called g mistresse ) and in many other respects there is a common equitie betwixt husbands and wiues ; whence many wiues gather that in all things there ought to be a mutuall equalitie . But from some particulars to inferre a generall is a very weake argument . 1. Doth it follow , that because in many things there is a common equitie betwixt Iudges of Assise , Iustices of peace , and Constables of townes , that therefore there is in all things an equalitie betwixt them ? 2. In many things there is not a common equitie : for the husband may command his wife , but not she him . 3. Euen in those things wherein there is a common equity , there is not an equality : for the husband hath euer euen in all things a superioritie : as if there be any difference euen in the forenamed instances , the husband must haue the stroake : as in giuing the name of Rachels youngest childe , where the wife would haue one name , the husband another , that name which the husband gaue , stood , ( Gen. 35. 18. ) Though there seeme to be neuer so little disparitie , yet God hauing so expresly appointed subiection , it ought to be acknowledged : and h though husband and wife may mutually serue one another through loue : yet the Apostle suffereth not a woman to rule ouer the man. §. 5. Of a wiues acknowledgement of her * owne husbands superioritie . The truth and life of that generall acknowledgement of husbands honour , consisteth in the particular application therof vnto their owne proper husbands . The next dutie therefore is , that wiues acknowledge their owne husbands , euen those to whom by Gods prouidence they are ioyned in mariage , to be worthy of an husbands honour , and to be their superiour : thus much the Apostle intendeth by that particle of restraint ( b owne ) which he vseth very often : so likewise doth c S. Peter , exhorting wiues to be in subiection to their owne husbands : and hereunto restraining the commendation of the ancient good wiues , that they were in subiection to their owne husbands . Obiect . What if a man of meane place be maried to a woman of eminent place , or a seruant be maried to his mistresse , or an aged woman to a youth , must such a wife acknowledge such an husband her superiour ? Answ . Yea verily : for in giuing her selfe to be his wife , and taking him to be her husband , she aduanceth him aboue herselfe , and subiecteth her selfe vnto him . It booteth nothing what either of them were before mariage : by vertue of the matrimoniall bond the husband is made the head of his wife , though the husband were before mariage a very begger , and of meane parentage , and the wife very wealthy and of a noble stocke ; or though he were her prentise , or bondslaue ; which also holdeth in the case betwixt an aged woman and a youth : for the Scripture hath made no exception in any of those cases . 2. Obiect . But what if a man of lewd and beastly conditions , as a drunkard , a glutton , a profane swaggerer , an impious swearer , and blasphemer , be maried to a wife , sober , religious Matron , must she account him her superiour , and worthy of an husbands honour ? Answ . Surely she must . For the euill qualitie and disposition of his heart and life , doth not depriue a man of that ciuill honour which God hath giuen vnto him . Though an husband in regard of euill qualities may carrie the Image of the deuill , yet in regard of his place and office he beareth the ●mage of God : so doe Magistrates in the common-wealth , Ministers in the Church , parents and masters in the familie . Note for our present purpose , the exhortation of S. Peter to Christian wiues which had infidell husbands , d Be in subiection to them : let your conuersation be in feare . If Infidels carrie ●ot the deuils Image , and are not , so long as they are Infidels , ●assals of Satan , who are ? yet wiues must be subiect to them , and feare them . §. 6. Of wiues denying honour to their owne husbands . Contrary thereunto is a very peruerse disposition in some wiues , who thinke they could better subiect themselues to any husband , then their owne . Though in generall they acknowledge that an husband is his wiues superiour , yet when the application commeth to themselues they faile , and cannot be brought to yeeld , that they are their husbands inferiours . This is a vice worse then the former . For to acknowledge no husband to be superiour ouer his wife , but to thinke man and wife in all things equall , may proceed from ignorance of hinde , and error of iudgement . But for a wife who knoweth and acknowledgeth the generall , that an husband is aboue his wife , to imagine that she her selfe is not inferiour to her husband , ariseth from monstrous selfe-conceit , and intolerable ●rrogancy , as if she her selfe were aboue her owne sex , and ●ore then a woman . Contrary also is the practise of such * women , as purposely ●ary men of farre lower ranke then themselues , for this very end , that they may rule ouer their owne husbands : and of others who being * aged , for that end mary youths , if not very boyes . A minde and practise very vnseemely , and cleaneth warting Gods ordinance . But let them thinke of ruling what they list , the truth is , that they make themselues subiects both by Gods law and mans : of which subiection such wiues doe oft feele the heauiest burden . Salomon noteth this to be one of the things for which the earth is disquieted , when a seruant reigneth . Now when can a seruant more dominere , then when he hath maried his mistresse ? As for aged women who are maried to youths , I may say ( as in another case it was said ) woe to thee ô wife whose husband is a childe . Vnmeet it is that an aged man should be maried to a young maid , but much more vnmeet for an aged woman to be maried to a youth . §. 7. Of a wiues * inward feare of her husband . Hitherto of a wiues acknowledgement of her husbands superioritie . It followeth to speake of that answerable respect which she ought to beare towards him . A wiue-like respect of her husband consisteth in two points : 1. Reuerence . 2. Obedience .   The reuerence which she oweth to him is 1. Inward . 2. Outward .   Inward reuerence is an awfull respect which a wife in her heart hath of her husband , esteeming him worthy of all honour for his place , and office sake , because he is her husband . Doubtlesse Sarah had in her heart a reuerend respect and honourable esteeme of her husband , when a being alone , and thinking of him in her very thought she gaue him this title Lord. This inward reuerence the Scripture compriseth vnder this word Feare : as where our Apostle saith , b Let the wife see that she feare her husband : and where c S. Peter exhorteth wiues to haue their conuersation in Feare . It is no slauish feare of her husband which ought to possesse the heart of a wife , dreading blowes , frownes , spightfull words , or the like ; but such an awfull respect of him as maketh her ( to vse the Apostles word ) d care how she may please him . This wiue-like Feare is manifested by two effects : one is Ioy , when she giueth contentment to her husband , and obserueth him to be pleased with that which she doth : the other is griefe , when he is iustly offended and grieued , especially with any thing that she her selfe hath done . Vnlesse this inward reuerence and due respect of an husband be first placed in the heart of a wife , either no outward reuerence and obedience will be performed at all , or if it be performed , it will be very vnsound , only in shew , hypocriticall and deceitfull : so that as good neuer a whit as neuer the better . For according to ones inward affection and disposition will the outward action and conuersation be framed . e Michal first despised Dauid in her heart , and thence it followed that she f vtteredmost vnreuerend and vile speeches of him , euen to his face . Wherefore after the iudgement of a wife is rightly informed of an husbands superioritie , and her will perswaded to account her owne husband her head and guide , it is very needfull that her heart and affection be accordingly seasoned with the salt of good respect , and high esteeme , which breedeth feare : and that thus her heart may be seasoned , she ought oft and seriously to meditate of his place and office , and of that honour which the Lord by vertue thereof hath planted in him . And if he haue gifts worthie his place , as knowledge , wisdome , pietie , temperance , loue , and the like , she ought to take notice thereof , and to thinke him worthie of double honour . §. 8. Of a wiues base esteeme of her husband . Contrary to this inward reuerence of the heart is a base and wile esteeme which many haue of their husbands , thinking no better of them then of other men ; nay worse then of others ; despising their husbands in their heart , like Michal , of whom we heard before . This , as it is in it selfe a vile vice , so is ●t a cause of many other vices , as of presumption , rebellion , yea and of adultery it selfe many times : and it is also a maine hinderance of all dutie . It commonly riseth either from selfe-conceit ( whereby wiues ouerweene their owne gifts , thinking them so excellent is they need no guide or head , but are rather fit to guide and rule both their husband and all the houshold : of which proud and presumptuous spirit Iezabel seemeth to be , who with an audacious and impudent face said to Ahab her husband , g Dost thou now gouerne the kingdome of Israel ? Up , I will giue thee the vineyard of Naboth . So also all those wiues which are noted to draw away their husbands hearts from the Lord , as the wiues of h Salomon , i Iehoram , and others : which they learned of their great grandmother k Euah : ) or else from some infirmities of minde or body , or of life , which they behold in their husbands ( whence it commeth to passe , that many husbands who are highly honoured and greatly accounted of by others , are much despised by their wiues , because their wiues alwaies conuersing with them are priuie to such infirmities as are concealed from others : ) or , which is worst of all , from vniust surmizes and suspicions , suspecting many euill things of their husbands whereof they are no way guiltie , and misinterpreting , and peruerting things well done , as l Michal peruerted Dauids holy zeale . For redresse of this enormous vice , wiues ought first in regard of themselues to purge out of their hearts pride , and selfe-conceit , thinking humbly and lowly of themselues , and that euen in regard of their sex and the weaknesse thereof : and if the Lord haue endued them with any gift aboue the ordinary sort of women , to note well their owne infirmities , and to lay them by their eminent gifts : thus by looking on their blacke feet , their proud-peacock-feathers may be cast downe . Yea also when they behold any infirmities in their husbands , they ought to reflect their eies on their owne infirmities , which it may be are euen as many and as grieuous , if not more in number , and more hainous in their nature and kinde : at least let them consider that they are subiect to the same , if God leaue them to the sway of their owne corruption . Secondly , wiues ought in regard of their husbands to surmize no euill whereof they haue not sure proofe and euidence : but rather interpret euery thing in better part : and follow the rule of loue , m which beareth all things , beleeueth all things , hopeth all things , endureth all things . If they note any defects of nature , and deformity of body , or any enormous and notorious vices in their husband , then ought they to turne their eies and thoughts from his person to his place , and from his vicious qualities to his honourable office ( which is to be an husband ) and this will abate that vile esteeme which otherwise might be occasioned from the forenamed meanes . §. 9. Of * wiue-like sobriety . A wiues outward reuerence towards her husband is a manifestation of her inward due respect of him . Now then seeing the intent of the heart , and inward disposition cannot be discerned by man simply in it selfe , that the husband may know his wiues good affection towards him , it is behouefull that she manifest the same by her outward reuerence . A wiues outward reuerence consisteth in her reuerend Gesture . Speech .   For the first , that a reuerend gesture & carriage of her selfe to her husband , and in her husbands presence , beseemeth a wife , was of old implied by the vaile which the woman vsed to put on , when she was brought vnto her husband , as is noted in the a example of Rebekah : whereunto the Apostle alludeth in these words , b the woman ought to haue power on her head . That couer on the womans head , as in generall it implied subiection , so in particular this kinde of subiection , viz. a reuerend carriage and gesture . But most expresly is this dutie set downe by c Saint Peter who exhorteth wiues to order their conuersation before their husbands , so as it be pure , with reuerence . This reuerend conuersation consisteth in a wiue-like sobrietie , mildnesse , courtesie , and modestie . By sobriety I meane such a comely , graue , and gratious carriage , as giueth euidence to the husband that his wife respecteth his place & the authority which God hath giuen him . Sobriety in generall is required of all women by reason of their sexe ; and surely it doth well become them all : but much more doth it become wiues : most of all , in their husbands presence . d The Apostle in particular enioyneth it to Deacons wiues , yet not so as proper vnto them , but in a further respect appertaining to them not only as wiues , but as the wiues of Deacons . Contrary to this sobriety is lightnesse and wantonnesse : which vices in a wife , especially before her husband , argueth little respect , if not a plaine contempt of him . Obiect . Thus shall all delightfull familiarity betwixt husband and wife be taken away . Answ . Though the forenamed sobriety be opposed to lightnesse and wantonnesse , yet not to matrimoniall familiarity : which is so farre permitted to man and wife , as if any other man and woman should so behaue themselues one towards another as an husband and wife lawfully may , it might iustly be counted lightnesse and sinne : instance the example of Isaak and Rebekah , who so sported together , as Abimelech , knowing them to be such as feared God , gathered by that sporting that they were man and wife : for he thought that otherwise they would not haue beene so familiar together . * This familiarity argueth both liking and loue : and sheweth that the man and wife delight in one anothers person . But the lightnesse here condemned in a wife , is not so much a mutuall familiarity with her husband by his good liking , as a wanton dallying with others to his griefe and disgrace . §. 10. Of * wiue-like mildnesse . Mildnesse in a wife hath respect also to the ordering of her countenance , gesture , and whole cariage before her husband , whereby she manifesteth a pleasingnesse to him , and a contentednesse and willingnesse to be vnder him and ruled by him . Excellently is this set forth in the spouse of Christ whose eies are said to be as doues eies , her lips to drop as honie combs , and she her selfe euery way pleasant : whereupon it is noted that she appeared to her husband as the bright morning , and that his heart was wounded with her . Assuredly the cleere skie is not more pleasant in time of haruest , then a milde and amiable countenance and carriage of a wife in her husbands presence . And though her husband should be of an harsh and cruell disposition , yet by this means might he be made meeke and gentle . For the keepers of Lions are said to bring them to some tamenesse by handling them gently and speaking to them fairely . Contrary to this mildnesse is a frowning brow , a lowring eie , a sullen looke , a powting lip , a swelling face , a deriding mouth , a scornefull cast of the armes and hands , a disdainfull turning of this side and that side of the body , and a fretfull flinging out of her husbands presence : all which and other like contemptuous gestures are as thicke clouds ouerspreading the heauens in a Summers day , which make it very vncomfortable . They oft stirre vp much passion in the man , and bring much mischiefe vpon the wife her selfe . §. 11. Of * wiue-like courtesie and obeysance . Courtesie is that vertue whereby a wife taketh occasion to testifie her acknowledgement of her husbands superiority by some outward obeysance to him . Rebekah , so soone as she saw Isaak , whom she had taken for her husband , lighted from her Camell and came to him on foot , which was a kinde of obeysance . This is not so to be taken as if no difference were to be made betwixt the carriage of a seruant , or childe , and a wife : or as if a wife should bow at euery word that she speaketh to her husband . Though in the kinde and extent of many duties the same things are required of wiues which are required of children and seruants , because God hath made them all inferiours , and exacted subiection of all : yet in the manner and measure of many duties there is great difference : as in this , the obeysance of children and seruants ought to be more submissiue , and more frequent . Yet because God hath placed authority in the husband ouer his wife , she is euery way to testifie her reuerend respect of her husband , and therefore at some times , on some occasions ( as when he is going on a iourney for a time from her , or when he returneth home againe , or when she hath a solemne and great sute to make vnto him , or when he offereth an especiall and extraordinary fauour vnto her , or ( as I haue obserued such wiues as know what beseemeth their place , and are not ashamed to manifest as much ) when she sitteth downe or riseth vp from table ) to declare her reuerence by some obeysance . This cannot but much worke on the heart of a good and kinde husband , and make him the more to respect his wife , when he beholdeth this euidence of her respect to him . Yea it cannot but be a good patterne to children and seruants , and a motiue to stirre them vp to yeeld all submissiue obeysance both to her husband and to her selfe . For it may make them thus to reason with themselues , shall we scorne or thinke much to yeeld that to our father or master which our mother or mistresse thinketh not much to yeeld to her husband ? shall-she bow to him , and shall not we much more bow to her ? Thus a wiues honouring of her husband by yeelding obeysance to him , maketh both him and her selfe to be more honoured of others . Contrarily minded are they , who not only altogether omit this dutie , but also gibe and scoffe at the very hearing thereof , saying , thus wiues shall be made no better then children or seruants . But though scornefull dames deride these outward euidences of their subiection , yet such wiues as feare the Lord ought not to be hindered thereby from doing their dutie : for by such euill examples they might be discouraged from euery good dutie . It is sufficient that such holy women as trusted in God so behaued themselues . But for this particular , we know that equals scorne not vpon occasions to performe this kinde of courtesie in making obeysance one to another : how much lesse ought wiues , who are their husbands inferiours ? §. 12. Of * wife-like modestie in apparell . Modestie appertaining to a wife is much manifested in her apparell . S. Paul requireth this modestie in generall of all sorts of women : but S. Peter presseth it in particular vpon wiues . For as it well beseemeth all women , so wiues after a peculiar manner , namely , in attiring themselues , to respect rather their husbands place and state , then their owne birth and parentage , but much rather then their owne minde and humour . A wiues modestie therefore requireth that her apparell be neither for costlinesse aboue her husbands abilitie , nor for curiousnesse vn beseeming his calling . As a poore mans wife must not affect costly apparell , so neither Ministers , graue Counsellours , sage Magistrates , no nor conscionable Professours wiues , hunt after new fashions , or in light and garish apparell attire themselues . It is a token of great reuerence in a wife towards her husband , to haue an eye to his place and state in her apparell . On the contrarie , such proud daines as must haue their owne will in their attire , and thinke it nothing appertaineth to their husbands to order them therein , who care not what their husbands abilitie , or what his place and calling be , they shew little respect and reuerence to their husbands . Such are they , who are no whit moued with their husbands example : but though the mans apparell be plaine and graue , yet the wiues shall be costly and garish . Yea many there be that stand in some more awe of their husbands sight , but shew little more respect vnto him , who haue their silken gownes , Beauer hats , and other like attire not agreeable to their place and state , lie in the countrey , if they be of the citie ; or in the citie , if they be of the countrey , in a friends house where their husbands shall not know it , and when their husbands are not with them , weare them , and paint their faces , lay out their haire , and in euerie thing follow the fashion . What can they which behold this thinke , but that such a wiues care is more to please other light vaine persons , then her graue , discreet husband : or that her husband can nothing at all preuaile with her : which as it staineth her owne credit , so it leaueth a blot of dishonour euen vpon him . If the care of a wife were to giue euidence of the reuerence which she beareth to her husband , his desire and example would in this respect more preuaile with her , then the humour of her owne heart . §. 13. Of a wiues * reuerend speech to her husband . As by gesture , so by speech also , must a wiues reuerence be manifested : this must be answerable to that . For by words as well as by deeds , the affection of the heart is manifested , a Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh . A wiues reuerence is manifested by her speech , both in her husbands presence , and also in his absence . For this end in his presence her words must be few , reuerend and meeke . First few : For the Apostle enioyneth b silence to wiues in their husbands presence , and inforceth that dutie with a strong reason in these words : I permit not the woman to vsurpe authoritie ouer the man , but to be in silence : the inference of the latter clause vpon the former sheweth that he speaketh not only of a womans silence in the Church , but also of a wiues silence before her husband : which is further cleared by another like place , where the same Apostle enioyneth wiues to c learne of their husbands at home . The reason before mentioned for silence , on the one side implieth a reuerend subiection , as on the other side too much speech implieth an vsurpation of authoritie . Obiect . Then belike a wife must be alwayes mute before her husband . Answ . No such matter : for silence in that place is not opposed to speech , as if she should not speake at all , but to loquacitie , to talkatiuenesse , to ouer-much tatling : her husbands presence must some what restraine her tongue , and so will her verie silence testifie a reuerend respect . Otherwise silence , as it is opposed to speech , would imply stoutnesse of stomacke , and stubbornnesse of heart , which is an extreme contrarie to loquacitie . But the meane betwixt both , is for a wife to be sparing in speech , to expect a fit time and iust occasion of speech , to be willing to hearken to the word of knowledge comming out of her husbands mouth . This argueth reuerence . d Elihu manifested thereuerend respect , which as a younger he bare to his elders , by for bearing to speake while they had any thing to say . How much more ought wiues in regard both of their sex and of their place ? Contrarie is their practise , who must and will haue all the prate . If their husbands haue begun to speake , their slipperie tongues cannot expect and tarrie till he haue done : if ( as verie hastile and forward they are to speake ) they preuent not their husbands , they will surely take the tale out of his mouth before he haue done : Thus-they disgrace themselues , and dishonour their husbands . §. 14. Of the * titles which wiues giue their husbands . As their words must be few , so those few words must be reuerend and meeke : both which are also implied vnder the forenamed word a silence : which in the originall signifieth also a quietnesse . Reuerence hath respect to the titles whereby a wife nameth her husband . Meeknesse to the manner of framing her speech to him . For the titles which a wife in speaking to her husband , or naming him , giueth vnto him , they must be such as signifie superioritie , and so sauour of reuerence . Such are the titles wherewith husbands are named in the Scripture ; * they are titles of honour . Such also are the titles which the Church ( who by our Apostle is made a patterne for wiues in all subiection ) giueth to her Spouse Christ Iesus , as may be gathered out of the Song of songs . It is likely that Sarah did vsually giue this title Lord to her husband . For hauing occasion to thinke of him , presently this title b Lord was in her heart : which would not so suddenly haue risen vp , if she had not ordinarily vsed it . According to the vsuall titles which we giue to any , doe we in our hearts name them , when we haue occasion to thinke of them . Among all other titles the name husband , as it is the most vsuall , so it is the fittest and meetest title . It intimateth reuerence , and sauoureth not of nicenesse & singularitie , as these titles , Head , Guide , Master , Man , and the like doe : which though they be lawfull titles , because the Scripture attributeth them to husbands , and they signifie superioritie , yet because they are vnusuall and sauour of singularitie , they are not so meet . Common vse and practise hath made the addition of the husbands surname to this title Master , more meet . c Saint Peter by this argument proueth that Sarah obeyed Abraham , because she called him Lord. Contrarie are those compellations which argue equalitie or inferioritie rather then superioritie , as Brother , Cosen , Friend , Man , &c. if a stranger be in presence , how can he tell by this manner of compellation , that he whom thou speakest vnto is thy husband ? If he espie any matrimoniall familiaritie betwixt you , what can he iudge of it otherwise to be , lightnesse and wantonnesse ? Remember the fearefull issue that had like to haue fallen out by reason of such compellations giuen by d Sarah and e Rebekah to their husbands . Not vnlike to those are such as these , Sweet , Sweeting , Heart , Sweet-heart , Loue , Ioy , Deare , &c. and such as these , Ducke , Chicke , Pigsnie , &c. and husbands Christian names , as Iohn , Thomas , William , Henry , &c. which if they be contracted ( as many vse to contract them thus , Iack● , Tom , Will , Hall ) they are much more vnseemly : seruants are vsually so called . But what may we say of those titles giuen to an husband by his wife , not seldome in passion , but vsually in ordinarie speech , which are not fit to be giuen to the basest men that be , as Grub , Rogue , and the like , which I am euen ashamed to name , but that the sins of women are to be cast as dirt on their faces , that they may be the more ashamed ? Obiect . Many of the forenamed titles are titles of amitie and familiaritie . Answ . Subiection is that marke which wiues are directed to aime at in their thoughts , words , deeds , and whole conuersation towards their husband . Such tokens of familiaritie as are not withall tokens of subiection and reuerence , are vnbeseeming a wife , because they swerue from that marke . §. 15. Of wiues * meeknesse in their speeches . Meeknesse in a wiues manner of framing her speech to her husband , doth also commend her reuerend respect of him . This is an especiall effect of that meeke and quiet spirit which S. Peter requireth of wiues ; which dutie he doth strongly inforce by this weighty argument , a which is before God a thing much set by . Is a wiues meeknesse much set by before God , and shall not wiues hold it both a bounden dutie , and comely ornament , and grace vnto them ? As the forme of words which a wife vseth in asking or answering questions , or any other kinde of discourse which shee holdeth with her husband , so her moderation in persisting , arguing and pressing matters , yea and the milde composition of her countenance in speaking , declare her meeknesse . If she be desirous to obtaine any thing of him , fairely she must intreat it , as the b Shunemite : If she would moue him to performe a bounden dutie , mildly she must perswade him . If she would restraine and keepe him from doing that which is euill , euen that also she must doe with some meeknesse , as c Pilats wife : If she haue occasion to tell him of a fault , therein she ought to manifest humilitie and reuerence , by obseruing a fit season , and doing it after a gentle manner as d Abigail : who as she wisely behaued her selfe in this respect with her husband in obseruing a fit season , so also with Dauid by intimating his fault vnto him , rather then plainly reprouing him , when she said , It shall be no griefe nor offence vnto my Lord , that he hath not shed bloud causelesse . This meeknesse requireth also silence and patience , euen when she is reproued . Contrary is the waspish and shrewish disposition of many wiues to their husbands , who care not how hastily and vnaduisedly they speake to them , like e Rahel ; nor how angerly and chidingly , like f Iezabel ; nor how disdainfully , and spightfully , like g Zipporah ; nor how scoffingly , and frumpingly , like h Michal ; nor how reproachfully and disgracefully , like i Iobs wife . If they be reproued by their husbands , their husbands shall be reproached by them : & they are ready to answer again , not only word for word , but ten for one . Many wiues by their shrewish speeches , shew no more respect to their husbands , then to their seruants , if so much . The least occasion moueth them not only inwardly to be angry and fret against them , but also outwardly to manifest the same by chiding and brawling . The very obiect whereupon many wiues vsually spit out their venomous words , is their husband ; when their stomacks are full , they must needs ease them on their husbands : wherein their fault is doubled . Let wiues therefore learne first to moderate their passion , and then to keepe in their tongues with bit and bridle , but most of all to take heed that their husbands taste not of the bitternesse thereof , no not though they should by some ouersight of their husbands be prouoked . It is to be noted how Salomon calleth the iarres which are betweene man and wife , the contentions of a wife , whereby he intimateth that she commonly is the cause thereof , either by prouoking her husband , or not bearing with him . §. 16. Of a wiues speech of her husband * in his absence . The reuerence which a wife beareth to her husband , must further be manifested by her speeches of him in his absence . So did Sarah manifest her reuerence , and so must all such as desire to be accounted the daughters of Sarah . The Church speaking of her Spouse , doth it with as great reuerence , as if she had spoken to him . It was for honour and reuerence sake , that the Virgin Mary called Ioseph the Father of Iesus , when she spake of him . This sheweth that a wiues reuerend speeches in presence of her husband and to his face , are not in flatterie to please him and fawne vpon him , but in sinceritie to please God and performe her dutie . Contrary therefore to their dutie deale they , who in presence can afford the fairest and meek est speeches that may be to their husbands face , but * behinde their backs speake most reproachfully of them . §. 17. Of a wiues obedience in generall . Hitherto of a wiues reuerence , it followeth to speake of her obedience : The first law that euer was giuen to woman since her fall , laid vpon her this dutie of Obedience to her husband , in these words , a Thy desire shall be to thine husband , and he shall rule ouer thee . How can an husband rule ouer a wife , if she obey not him ? The principall part of that submission which in this b text , and in many other places is required of a wife , consisteth in obedience : and therefore it is expresly commended vnto wiues in the example of Sarah who c obeyed Abraham . Thus by Obedience doth the Church manifest her subiection to Christ . The place wherein God hath set an husband ; namely , to be an d head ; the authoritie which he hath giuen vnto him , to be a e Lord and f Master ; the duty which he requireth of him g to rule , doe all require obedience of a wife . Is not obedience to be yeelded to an Head , Lord , and Master ? Take away all authoritie from an husband , if ye exempt a wife from obedience . Contrary is the stoutnesse of such wiues as must haue their own will , and doe what they list , or else all shall be out of quiet . Their will must be done , they must rule and ouer-rule all , they must command not only children and seruants , but husbands also , if at least the husband will be at peace . Looke into families , obserue the estate and condition of many of them , and then tell me if these things be not so . If an husband be a man of courage , and seeke to stand vpon his right , and maintaine his authoritie by requiring obedience of his wife , strange it is to behold what an hurly burly she will make in the house : but if he be a milke-sop , and basely yeeld vnto his wife , and suffer her to rule , then , it may be , there shall be some outward quiet . The ground hereof is an ambitious and proud humour in women , who must needs rule , or else they thinke themselues slaues . But let them thinke as they list : assuredly herein they thwart Gods ordinance , peruert the order of nature , deface the image of Christ , ouerthrow the ground of all dutie , hinder the good of the family , become an ill patterne to children and seruants , lay themselues open to Satan , and incurre many other mischiefes which cannot but follow vpon the violating of this maine duty of Obedience , which if it be not performed , how can other duties be expected ? §. 18. Of the cases wherein a wife hath power to order things of the house without her husbands consent . A wiues obedience requireth Submission . Contentment .   Submission in yeelding to her husbands minde and will. * Contentment in resting satisfied and content with his estate and abilitie . That Submission consisteth in two things . First , in abstaining from doing things against her husbands minde . Secondly , in doing what her husband requireth . The former of these requireth that a wife haue her husbands consent for the things which she doth . For the better cleering whereof we are to consider , 1. What kinde of husbands they must be whose consent is required . 2. How many waies his consent may be giuen . 3. What are the things whereabout his consent is to be expected . For the first , as on the one side it oft falleth out that a wife , prouident , and religious man is maried to a foolish woman , a very ideot , that hath no vnderstanding , of whom there can be no question , but that such a wife is to doe nothing of her selfe , and of her owne head , but altogether to be ordered by her husband : So on the other side , it oft falleth out that a wise , vertuous , and gratious woman , is maried to an husband destitute of vnderstanding , to a very naturall ( as we say ) or a ●renzy man , or to one made very blockish , and stupid , vnfit to manage his affaires through some distemper , wound , or sicknesle . In such a case the whole gouernment lieth vpon the wife , so as her husbands consent is not to be expected . Quest . What if the husband be a wicked and prophane man , and so blinded and stupified in his soule , doth not this spirituall blindnesse and blockishnese giue a religious wife as great libertie as naturall stupiditie ? Answ . No verily : For S. Peter exhorteth faithfull wiues that were maried to Infidell husbands to be subiect to them , and that in feare . The reason is cleare : For spirituall blindnesse disableth not from ciuill gouernment : indeed nothing that such a man doth is acceptable to God , or auailable to his owne saluation ; but yet it may be profitable to man : a wicked man may be prouident enough for wife , children , and whole family in outward temporall things . Againe , it oft falleth out , that an husband is a long time 2 farre off absent from the house : sometimes by reason of his calling , as an Ambassadour , Souldier , or Mariner ; sometimes also carelesly or wilfully neglecting house , goods , wife , children and all : and in his absence hath left no order for the ordering of things at home : in this case also there is no question , but that the wife hath power to dispose matters without her husbands consent : prouided that she obserue those rules of Gods word concerning iustice , equitie , truth and mercie , which an husband in his disposing of them ought to obserue . The first of these cases declareth an impotencie in the husband : the other an impossibilitie for him to order matters : wherefore the wife being next to the husband , the power of ordering things is diuolued on her : she is not bound to haue his consent . §. 19. Of diuers kindes of consent . II. A consent may be generall or particular . A generall consent is giuen , when without distinct respect to this or that particular , libertie is granted to a wife by her husband to doe all things as seemeth good in her owne eyes . a That excellent good wife , and notable good house-wife that is set forth by the Wise-man , had such a consent . For first , it is said , b The heart of her husband trusteth in her ; and then it is inferred , that she ordereth all the things of the house , whereof many particulars are there specified . Whence I gather , that her husband obseruing her to be a godly , wise , faithfull , and industrious woman , gaue her power and liberty to doe in the house-hold affaires , what she thought good , ( he being a publike magistrate , for c he was knowne in the gates , sitting among the Elders of the land ) and accordingly she vsed her liberty . A particular consent is that which is giuen to one or more particular things , as that consent d which Abraham gaue to Sarah about Hagar ; and e that which Elkanah gaue to Hanna about tarrying at home till her childe was weined . This particular consent may be expressed or implied . An expressed consent is when the husband manifesteth his good liking by word , writing , message , or signe , and that whether his consent be asked ( as was noted in the example of Elkanah ) or freely offered . An implicit consent , when by any probable coniecture it may be gathered that the husbands will is not against such a thing , though he haue not manifested his minde concerning that very particular . This implicit consent may be gathered either by his silence when he is present to see a thing done , or otherwise hath knowledge thereof : or else when he is absent , by his former cariage or disposition in other like cases . The Scripture accounteth an husbands silence , when he knoweth a thing and may , but doth not forbid it , to be a consent : as f in the case of a wiues vow . For any thing we read to the contrary g the Shunemite had no other consent to prepare a chamber for the Prophet , and to goe vnto him , then her husbands silence , and not forbidding it when he knew it . As for the other kinde of implicit consent , it may be set forth in this following instance : suppose a good wife hath an husband whom she knoweth by his former cariage and disposition to be a pittifull and charitable man , taking all occasions to shew mercy , and in his absence there falleth out a fit and needfull occasion of shewing mercy ; if she take that occasion to shew mercy , she hath an implicit consent , for she may well thinke that if her husband knew it he would approue what she doth . It is to be supposed that h Annah vpon some such ground vowed her childe to God. For it is not likely that she who would not tarry at home to weine her childe without her husbands consent , would much lesse vow him to the Lord ( which was a farre greater matter ) without some perswasion of her husbands good liking thereof . Now that a wife may shew she dealeth vprightly in this case vpon a true perswasion of her heart concerning her husbands minde , she ought ( when conueniently she can ) to make known to her husband what she hath done : as without all question Annah did ; and so much may be gathered out of these words which Elkanah vttered to Annah , i the Lord establish his word . §. 20. Of the things whereabout a wife must haue her husbands consent . The things whereabout an husbands consent is to be expected , are such as he by vertue of his place and authoritie hath power to order : as for example , ordering and disposing the goods , cattell , seruants , and children of the family , entertaining strangers ; yea , also ordering euen his wiues going abroad , and making of vowes , with the like : now then distinctly to lay downe a wiues dutie in this first branch of obedience , it is this : A wife must doe nothing which appertaineth to her husband authoritie simply without , or directly against his consent . Doe not these words of that old law ( thy desire shall be to thy husband ) imply as much ? I deny not but that there may be sundry things proper and peculiar to a wife , wherein I will not restraine her libertie : and therefore I vse this phrase ( which appertaineth to her husbands authoritie . ) And I grant the forenamed generall and implicit consent , to be a true consent , so as there needeth not an expresse particular consent for euery thing , and therefore I haue added these clauses ( simply without , or directly against consent . ) That is done simply without consent which is done without all warrant from the husband , and that so couertly as she is afraid it should come to his notice , imagining he would by no meanes like it : As Rahels taking her fathers idols without all consent of Iaakob . That is done directly against consent which is expresly forbidden and disclaimed by the husband . But to descend to the particulars before mentioned : First concerning the goods of the family : It is a question controuerted whether the wife haue power to dispose them without or against the husbands consent . Before I determine the question , I thinke it needfull to declare , 1. What goods , 2. What occasion of giuing the question is about . §. 21. Of the things which a wife may dispose without her husbands consent . 1. For the goods , some are proper and peculiar to the wife : others are common . Goods proper to the wife are such as before mariage she her selfe , or her friends except from the husband to her sole and proper vse and disposing , whereunto he also yeeldeth : or such as after mariage he giueth vnto her to dispose as she please : suppose it be some rent , annuity , fees , ●ailes , or the like . These kindes of goods are exempted out of the question in hand ; the wife hath liberty to dispose them as she please without any further consent then she had by vertue of her hausbands former grant . To these I may referre other goods , but of another nature , namely such as some friend of hers , suppose father , mother , brother , or any other , obseruing her husband to be a very ●ard man , not allowing sufficient for her selfe , much lesse to distribute on charitable vses , shall giue vnto her to dispose as ●e please , charging her not to let her husband know thereof . How because it is in the power of a free doner to order his ●ift as he please , and because he so ordereth this gift as he will not haue her husband know of it , I doubt not but she may of her selfe according to the doners minde without her husbands consent , dispose such goods . She is herein but as a ●offee in trust . Againe of common goods some are set forth by the husband to be spent about the family , other he reserueth for a ●ocke , or to lay forth as he himselfe shall see occasion . Concerning those which are set forth to be spent , I doubt ●ot but the wife hath power to dispose them ; neither is she ●ound to aske any further consent of her husband . For it is the wiues place and dutie to guide or gouerne the house , by vertue whereof , prouiding sufficiently for the family , she may , as she seeth good occasion , of such goods as are set apart to be spent , distribute to poore , or otherwise . This I haue noted for such tender consciences as thinke they cannot giue a bit of bread , or scarp of meat to a poore body , or make a messe of broth or caudle for a sicke body , except they first aske their husbands consent . Prouided that if her husband expresly forbid this liberty , she take it not except necessity require it . But our question is concerning such goods as the husband hath not set apart , but reserued to his owne disposing . §. 22. Of a wiues liberty in extraordinary matters . II. For the occasion of disposing goods it may be ordinary or extraordinary . Extraordinary for the good of the husband himselfe , and others in the family , or such as are out of the family . If there fall out an extraordinary occasion whereby the wife by disposing the goods without or against the consent of her husband may bring a great good to the family , or preuent and keepe a great mischiefe from it , she is not to stay for his consent ; instance the example of a Abigail . Thus a faithfull prouident wife obseruing her husband to riot , and to spend all he can get in carding , dicing , and drinking , may without his consent lay vp what goods she can for her husbands , her own , her childrens , and whole housholds good . This is no part of disobedience , but a point wherein she may shew her selfe a great good helpe vnto her husband ; b for which end a wife was first made . Concerning such as are out of the family , if they be in great need , and require present releefe , though the wife know her husband to be so hard-hearted , as he will not suffer her to releeue such an one , yet without his consent she may releeue him . The ground of this and other like cases is that rule laid downe by the Prophets , and by Christ himselfe , viz. c I will haue mercie and not sacrifice . If God in case of mercie dispenseth with a dutie due to himselfe , will he not much more dispense with a dutie due to an husband ? §. 23. Of a wiues * restraint in disposing goods without consent of her husband : and of the ground of that restraint . Out of all these things thus premised I gather the true state of the question in controuersie concerning the power of wiues in disposing the goods of the family to be this , Whether a wife may priuily and simply without , or openly and directly against her husbands consent distribute such common goods of the family as her husband reserueth to his owne disposing , there being no extraordinary necessity ? The most ancient and common answer vnto this question hath beene negatiue , namely , that a wife hath not power so to doe : whereunto I for my part subscribe . The ground of this answer is taken from that primary law of the wiues subiection , a Thy desire shall be vnto thine husband . How is her desire subiect to her husband , if in the case propounded she stand not vpon his consent ? It is further confirmed both by the b forenamed , and also by all other proofes that might be produced out of the Scripture concerning the subiection of wiues vnto their husbands . If in ordering the goods of the family she yeeld not subiection , wherein shall she yeeld it ? Against this ground-worke some obiect that c the same law of subiection is imposed vpon a younger brother in the very same words , and yet a younger brother was not therby bound to haue his elder brothers consent in disposing his goods . Answ . The law of the regality ( as I may so speake ) and preheminency of the first borne was vnder those words ordained : and therfore a younger brother was made a subiect to his elder , while he remained in the family , as a sonne to the father . The elder brother was as a lord ouer his other brothers : whereupon when Isaak conferred the right of the first borne vpon Iaakob ( thinking he had beene his eldest sonne Esau ) he vsed these words , Be lord ouer thy brethren , and let thy mothers sonnes bow downe to thee . Which being so , questionlesse the younger brother might not simply without or directly against the elder brothers consent dispose the goods of the family : so as this obiection more strongly establisheth the forenamed argument . Againe it is obiected that that old law is to be expounded of weighty matters . Answ . The Apostle who was guided by the spirit of the law-maker , extendeth that law to euery thing : But is not this matter of disposing goods a weighty matter ? The consequences which I shall by and by note to follow hereupon will shew it to be a matter of moment . §. 24. Of the example of the Shunemite in asking her husbands consent . As another reason may be alleged the Shunemites patterne who asked her husbands consent before she prepared the things that were thought meet for the Prophets entertainment : and before she vsed the things which were meet for her iourney . Obiect . It is indeed commendable for wiues to seeke their husbands consent as she did , but where such consent cannot be had , it is not necessary . Answ . This example being grounded vpon a law ( as we shewed * before ) it doth not only declare what may be done , but also what ought to be done . And if a wife be bound to haue her husbands consent for doing of a thing , by consequence it followeth that she is bound from doing it , without her husbands consent . 2. Answ . They that except against this reason taken from example , vse themselues the like reason in other points , as the examples of Abigail , Ioanna , and Susanna for the contrarie . 2. Obiect . In the Shunemites example there was more then a mercifull releefe of the Prophet , namely bringing him into the house to diet and to lodge , wherein the husband must haue a chiefe stroake . Answ . The word of God maketh not that difference betwixt releeuing and entertaining : it extendeth a wiues subiection to euery thing : wherefore the husband hath a chiefe stroake as well in the one , as in the other . §. 25. Of the law of a wiues vow . A third reason is taken from the law of a wiues vow : whereby in generall is implied , that a wife might not make a vow without her husbands consent : whence it followeth as an argument taken from the greater to the lesse , that she may not dispose the goods without his consent . Yea , b the Law further expresly saith , that though she hath vowed , yet her husband hath power to disanull her vow . Note here , how the Lord will rather depart from his owne right ( as I may so speake ) then haue that order which he hath appointed betwixt man and woman broken . The Lords right , was to haue what was vowed to him performed : the order which he appointed , was to haue the wife subiect to her husband : rather then the wife should doe that which the husband would not haue done , the Lord remitted a wiues vow in case her husband would not consent to haue it performed . Now then I demand , is the disposing of goods a greater matter then the performing of a vow ? or hath a wife in these dayes more libertie then in former ? if she haue , by what law ? was there euer vnder the Law a straiter charge laid vpon wiues then this , Let wiues be subiect to their husbands in euerie thing . Obiect . That point of a womans subiection in performing her vow , is a particular ruled case : but not this of disposing goods . Answ . The Scripture by particular Lawes and examples teacheth directions for other cases like to them : and arguments drawne by iust and necessarie consequence , are counted as sound as expresse testimonies . Whereas it is said , that this particular in question is not expresly decided , I take the reason thereof to be this , that in former times they so well marked the extent of the generall law of a wiues subiection , as they made no question of doing this or other like things without their husbands consent . Neither did good wiues take that libertie , neither had they any patrons of such libertie . 2. Obiect . The case of a wiues disposing goods is vnlike to that of vowes , because vowes are voluntarie , but disposing goods , as a worke of mercie , is necessarie . Answ . Though it were a voluntarie thing to make , or not to make a vow : yet a vow being made , it was not in the power of the partie that made it , not to performe it : it was a c necessarie dutie to performe a vow , euen expresly commanded . As for the pretended worke of mercie , I will hereafter shew , that a wife is not necessarily tied thereunto . §. 26. Of humane lawes which restraine wiues from disposing goods , without or against their husbands consent . A fourth is taken from the lawes of men whereunto we are subiect , and which we must obey euen for conscience sake , so farre as they thwart not Gods Law , which in this case they doe not , as the reasons before gathered out of Gods word doe shew . Now our Law saith , that a euerie gift , grant , or disposition of goods , lands , or other thing whatsoeuer made by a woman couert , and all and euerie obligation and feoffment made by her , and recouerie suffered , if they be done without her husbands consent , are void . Yea , b if she doe wrong to another , she hath not any thing to make satisfaction during couerture : either her husband must doe it , or by imprisonment of her person must it be done . And c though she haue inheritance of her owne , yet can she not grant any annuitie out of it during her couerture , without her husband : if any deed be made to that purpose without his consent , or in her name alone , it is void in law . Yea , d if there be debate betweene the husband and his wife , whereby certaine lands of the husbands be assigned to the wife with his consent , if out of such lands she grant an annuitie to a stranger , the grant is void . And e if he couenant to giue her yeerely such and such apparell , she cannot dispose it as she list without his consent , but only vse and weare it her selfe . f Neither can she lease her owne land for yeeres , for life , &c. if she doe , it is void , and the Lessee entring by force thereof , is a Disseisor to the husband , and Trespassor . And g if she sell any thing , the sale is void , except she be a merchant , where by the custome she is enabled to merchandize . Finally , h she cannot make executors without the consent of her husband , nor a deuise , or will. i If she make a will , and thereby deuise her owne inheritance , and her husband die , and she after die without any new publication of it , it is of no force , because it was void at first . These and many other like cases which might be alleaged euidently shew that by law a wife hath not power of her selfe , without her husband , to dispose the common goods of the familie . §. 27. Of the inconueniences which may follow vpon a wiues disposing goods without or against her husbands consent . A fit reason may be taken from the mischiefes which would fall out if this liberty were giuen vnto women : which are these that follow : 1. The estate of the family might be wasted before any redresse could be thought of : for if the wife may dispose the goods without her husbands consent , it must also be granted without his knowledge : for it is to be supposed that if he knew of the disposing of that which he liketh not , he would hinder it : if without his knowledge , then may that which he thinketh to be remaining as a stocke for the family , be laid out by the wife , and nothing left : whereas if he knew of the spending of that stocke , it might be he would be more thrifty and sparing in other expences . Obiect . This liberty is not granted to wiues beyond their husbands ability . Answ . Wiues cannot alwaies know their husbands ability : for their husbands may be much indebted , and yet to maintaine his credit , whereby he hopeth to raise his estate , may allow liberall maintenance for his house , if thereupon his wife shall gather that he is very rich , and accordingly be very bountifull in her gifts , she may soone goe beyond his ability , and so increase his debt , as he shall neuer be able to recouer himselfe . 2. Persons of contrary religions and dispositions being out of the family , might be maintained by the goods of the same family : for if the husband were of one religion , and the wife of another , he without her knowledge might maintaine those of his religion , and she without his knowledge might maintaine them of her religion . Obiect . This liberty of disposing goods giuen to the wife is limited within the bounds of the houshold of faith . Answ . If Diuines grant them this liberty , they will themselues iudge and determine who be of the houshold of faith : Popish wiues will say ( say we what we can to the contrary ) that Iesuites , Priests , and Friers , are of the houshold of faith , principall members thereof . 3. Many iarres and contentions would thence arise betwixt husband and wife : for if a wife shall persist to doe that which her husband will not consent vnto , assuredly one of a thousand will not well brooke it , but will rather seeke all the wayes he can to crosse her ; thinking himselfe despised , if she , whether he will or no , haue her minde . Obiect . Wiues must vse this libertie with all due respect vnto their husbands authoritie . Answ . If the husband peremptorily stand vpon his authoritie , and by all the faire meanes that can be vsed , will not yeeld this libertie , I know not what better respect she can shew to this authoritie , then to forbeare and abstaine from doing that which otherwise she would most gladly doe : But if when it commeth to the vttermost point , and she shall say it is her right , and if she cannot haue his consent , she will doe it without his consent , she therein sheweth no great respect . Many other inconueniences might be reckoned vp , but I will not longer insist on them , only from these let it be well considered , whether it were not better for a familie , that the husband should be bard from disposing the goods without consent of his wife ( so as there might be according to the prouerbe , but one hand in the purse ) then both husband and wife to haue libertie to dispose them without each others consent . §. 28. Of propertie in goods , whether it giue libertie to dispose them as a wife will. To iustifie a wiues libertie in disposing the common goods of the family without her husbands consent , it is said , that she hath a true right and propertie in those goods . 1. Answ . Though it were granted that a wife hath a true property in the goods , yet this conclusion would not follow thereupon , that she hath power of her selfe to dispose the goods without her husbands consent : for the authoritie which God hath giuen an husband , and subiection which he hath laid on a wife , restraine her power and libertie in that which is her owne : as for example , suppose * that a woman at the time of her mariage haue a lease for yeeres , or the wardship of the body and lands of an infant , or haue it by gift or purchase after mariage , she cannot giue it away whatsoeuer the extremitie be : but her husband may any time during couerture , dispose of it : and such his disposition shall cut off the wiues interest . Or suppose that the only childe of her father be an inheretrix of land , and haue in her selfe ( her father being dead ) the full possession thereof : or that a widow haue the right vnto , and possession of her husbands estate , and thus possessed be maried to an husband , hath she being a wife liberty to dispose that estate which she brought with her without or against her husbands consent ? I thinke none will say it . Sure I am that what she giueth , lendeth , selleth , or otherwise disposeth without his consent , he if he will , may for his life-time recouer againe : and yet no man will denie but that she hath the truest interest and propertie in the forenamed lands and inheritance . Obiect . May she not as well dispose of her owne inheritance , as of those goods , or reuenues which her husband giueth her ? Answ . No , for the gift of the husband is a generall consent of his for her to dispose that which is giuen her as she seeth meet . §. 29. Of the reasons against a wiues propertie in the common goods of the family . 2. Answ . It may safely be denied that a wife hath a propertie in the common goods of the family whereof she is no heire , for property in goods is a ciuill matter , and to be limited according to the law of man vnder which we liue . Where the law , or custome of the place , make all the children coheires , all haue an equall right to their seuerall parts : where the eldest only is made heire , he hath a right to all : where the youngest only is made heire , he hath a right to all : but neither the law of nations , nor of the land where we liue giue the wife a property . a By the common law mariage is a gift of all the goods and chattels personall of the wife to her husband , so that no kinde of propertie in the same remaineth in her . b And all personall goods and chattels during mariage giuen to the wife are presently ipso facto transferred ( as to the property of them ) to the husband . So that by our law she is so farre from gaining any property by her mariage in her husbands goods , as she loseth all the property she formerly had in her owne goods . Yea c her necessary apparell is not hers in property . While she remaineth a wife she is ( to vse the law-phrase ) vnder couert baron . d She can neither let , sell , alien , giue , nor otherwise of right make any thing away , no nor yet make a will so to dispose any goods while her husband liueth without his consent : which yet an husband may while his wife liueth , and that without or against her consent . Obiect . The law states a wife in a great part of the husbands goods , prouiding for her iointer or thirds which the husband cannot make away without her consent . Answ . This prouision is only for the time of her widowhood in case she ouerliue him : but for the time that she remaineth his wife he may make away all , and she can recouer none , till he be dead . Obiect . This restraint of wiues is only in the court of men . Answ . Seeing it is not against the law of God , it must also hold good in the court of Conscience . Nay it is agreeable to the law of God and grounded thereupon . For ( to omit the proofes before alleaged ) what might be the reason that the daughters of Zelophehad , who were heires to their father , were forbidden to mary out of their fathers tribe , and that a law was made that no daughters that possessed any inheritance should mary out of their fathers tribe , but because all that a woman had before mariage , passed vpon the husband and became his by vertue of mariage ? This also for that purpose is by some not vnfitly , nor without probabilitie noted , that it is the common phrase of Scripture to terme husbands ( but not wiues ) rich , implying thereby that riches by a property appertaine to husbands : yea vsually in Scripture goods and lands are said to be the husbands . Obiect . The wiues of Iaakob doe terme the goods which their husbands had theirs , saying , the riches which God hath taken from our Father is OVRS , Gen. 31. 16. Answ . They vse the word Ours in opposition to their fathers house , and in relation not to their persons , but to their husbands family , and therefore they adde and our childrens : So as by that place no greater right can be proued for wiues , then for children . When the holy Ghost speaketh of the same goods , he saith not in relation to husband and wiues both , their flockes , their substance , but only in relation to the husband , his flockes , his substance . For as in mixture of wine and water , though the greater quantitie be water , yet we call the whole , wine : so in the common goods of the family , though the wife should bring the greater part , we call all the husbands . §. 30. Of answers to the reasons for a wiues property . To proue a wiues property in the common goods of the family the reasons following are alledged . 1. Obiect . Mariage giuing a wife right of her husbands body , doth much more of his goods . Answ . I denie the consequence . For the vse of the body is a proper act of the matrimoniall bond , wherein the difference betwixt superioritie and subiection appeareth not : the wife hath as great a power ouer the husbands body as the husband ouer the wiues : which is not so in the goods : no one thing can be named , wherein the power and authoritie of the husband more consisteth , then in the goods . 2. Obiect . In the forme of mariage the man saith to his wife , with all my worldly goods I thee indow . Answ . 1. Those words are to be taken of the vse of his goods , and not of a property in them . 2. If an husband shall intend a property by them , that property which she hath thereby , she hath not by vertue of the generall law of mariage , but of his particualar free donation . 3. In all countries those words are not vsed in the forme of mariage . If those words giue the wife her property , then such wiues as are maried without those words vsed , haue no property : so as this cannot be a generall ground of liberty for all wiues . 3. Obiect . A wife hath as good an estate in her husbands goods as the Church in Christs bloud : but there the Church hath a property . Answ . Neither of those points can be proued . But if a wiues right in her husbands goods be as the Churches in Christs bloud , what is gotten thereby ? The Church hath not power without or against Christs consent to dispose his bloud : The Church of Rome is counted a proud vsurping strumpet for taking vpon her so to doe . §. 31. Of the priuiledges of wiues aboue Children and seruants in and about the goods of the familie . Quest . Where then is the preferment of the wife aboue seruants and children , if she haue not a property ? I answer , Much euery manner of way . 1. a There is due to her a more free and plentifull vse of all the goods , then vnto them . 2. By her place she hath the ordering and disposing of the goods allotted for the common vse of the familie : as was b before granted . 3. Her husband ought to giue her a portion to dispose as she shall see good , c as we shall after shew , when we come to the husbands duties . 4. She is a ioint gouernour with her husband ouer the children and seruants , as was shewed d before . Againe I answer , that this argument might as well be alledged against that feare , subiection , and obedience which the Scripture expresly requireth of wiues , and it might be demanded , if wiues must feare and obey their husbands and be subiect vnto them , where is their preferment aboue their children and seruants . But e it hath beene shewed that though the same things for matter be required of wiues which are required of children and seruants , yet there is a great difference in the manner of performing them . §. 32. Of examples and other reasons alleadged for libertie of wiues to dispose goods . 2. Abigails example is alleadged for a wiues libertie : and the example of the good house wife described by Salomon . Answ . 1. Abigails example was extraordinary ; besides , who can tell whether the heart of her husband so trusted not in her as he referred the whole gouernment of the house to her , and so she had a generall consent for what she did . 2. It is cleere that the other good-wife had her husbands consent for what she did : for besides that it is said the heart of her husband trusted in her , it is also said , that he praised her . Therefore he was neither ignorant of that which shee did , nor vnwilling she should doe it : it was neither without nor against his consent . 3. It is alleadged that wiues haue as great a care in getting goods , or in preseruing them for the good of the familie : therefore it is iust and equall , that they should haue a like power in disposing them . Answ . Though question may be made of the former part , at least for the greater sort and number of wiues , yet for answer to this reason I need not question it ; for the consequence doth not follow , though that be granted . The right of disposing goods doth not simply rise from the care and paines of getting and preseruing them : but from that order that the Lord hath beene pleased to set downe . A wise and industrious childe may be a meanes to raise and increase his fathers estate , when his father taketh little care and paines about it : yea a faithfull and wise steward or other seruant ( as Iaakob and Ioseph were ) may doe much more by his paines and care in getting and preseruing the goods of the familie , then his master : yet will it not thereupon follow , that such a childe , or such a seruant hath as great a right and power to dispose such goods as his father or his master . 4. The neere coniunction betwixt man and wife is alleaged : they are said to be yoake-fellowes , and thence is inferred that they haue a like power in disposing goods . Answ . They are yoak-fellowes in mutuall familiaritie , not in equall authoritie ; and in relation to others as children and seruants , not in opposition each to other . In this respect she is subiect , not equall . If therefore he will one thing , and she another , she may not thinke to haue an equall right and power , she must giue place and yeeld . §. 33. Of the * subiection of wiues in distributing goods to charitable vses . Some that grant that a wife is so subiected to her husband in a ciuill manner , as she may not dispose any part of his goods at her pleasure to any ciuill vse , denie this subiection to extend to giuing of almes , and such like charitable vses . Before I come to determine this question , let it be remembred , that it was before granted , that a ordinarie dutie must giue place to extraordinarie need , so that releefe in present necessitie is not controuerted . Let it be also remembred that b a wife may haue goods proper to her selfe , yea c it shall be shewed that an husband ought according to his abilitie to commit something to her discretion and disposition : of these and such like goods she is as much bound as her husband to expend something to charitable vses : and ( as God offereth occasion ) d to reach forth her hand to the poore and needy . Yea further let this be premised , that in case a wife be forbidden or restrained by her husband , she ought to vse all the good meanes she can by her selfe and her friends to moue her husband to grant her some libertie , that she may haue some triall of her mercifull and charitable disposition : if herein she cannot preuaile , then she ought to make knowne vnto her husband such persons cases as she thinkes meet to be releeued , and vse all the motiues she can to perswade him to afford them some releefe . But put the case a wise , religious , mercifull wife , be maried to a couetous worldling , who though he haue wit , and vnderstanding enough to manage ciuill affaires , and to prouide for the outward temporall estate of the house , yet hath no heart to releeue the poore , and is not only vnwilling himselfe to doe good in that kinde , but will not suffer his wife to doe it , whether may a wife priuilie take of such goods as he hath reserued to his owne disposing , and simply without any kinde of consent distribute them to charitable vses , or though he expresly forbid her , yet directly against his consent dispose them ? With reuerend respect to better iudgements , I thinke she may not ( except before excepted . ) For it being before proued in generall , that she had no such liberty in disposing goods , I cannot see how this particular end of giuing almes can dispence with her generall subiection in euery thing , except there were some particular warrant for it in Gods word . §. 34. Of generall exhortations to works of mercy . How far they binde wiues . Obiect . The many generall exhortations vnto workes of mercy , which without limitation to any particular persons , are indefinitely directed to all , doe giue sufficient warrant to wiues : such as these , a Giue almes . b Let vs doe good . c To distribute forget not , &c. Answ . All these are strong motiues to prouoke wiues to be mercifull and charitable in such things as they may , by any means with their husbands consent , or in such things as by their husbands are giuen to them . Yea also they are strong motiues to prouoke husbands to allow them liberty to giue almes . But in the case propounded they giue no liberty to wiues : for it is a ruled case laid downe by Christ himselfe , that workes of charity must be done , and almes must be giuen of such things d as we haue , or which are in our power to giue . Now if the husband will not giue her that power , she hath not power to giue , and so is excused . In this case her true will , and her faithfull and earnest desire shall be accepted for the deed , according to that which the Apostle saith , if there be first a willing minde , it is accepted according to that a man hath , and not according to that he hath not . Many cases may be giuen wherein inferiours are restrained from workes of mercy ; as suppose a sonne or seruant be desirous to visit one sicke ●r in prison , but his Parent or Master ( though leaue be asked ) will not suffer him , but charge him not to stirre out of doores , or ●o goe with him another way , shall this sonne or seruant notwithstanding that charge , doe that worke of mercy ? §. 35. Of obedience to an husband in such things as he sinfully forbiddeth . Obiect . 2. This restraint is not in the Lord , but rather against him and his word , therefore a wife is not bound thereunto . Answ . Though the husband sinne in restraining his wife , yet shee in that restraint may obey , and that in the Lord : because the Lord who hath commanded her to be subiect in euery thing , hath no where warranted her not to be subiect in this particular . It is expresly said in the law concerning a wiues vowes , that if her husband breake them after he hath heard them , he shall beare her iniquity . Did not he then sinne in restraining her , and was not she guiltlesse though she yeelded to his restraint ? The condition betwixt husbands and wiues in this case , is not vnlike the case betwixt other superiours in authority , and their inferiours in subiection . But other inferiours may lawfully abstaine from such things as their gouernours doe sinfully charge them to abstaine from . For suppose a sonne growen to be a man , liue in his fathers house at his fathers finding , and haue no set portion of his owne , and his father will not giue him leaue to bestow any thing on charitable vses , is he now bound to giue almes ? shall the curse be executed on him if he giue not ? A crosse indeed I acknowledge it to be , both to such a sonne , and also to a wife to be so restrained : but not a curse or sinne ; the sinne and curse lieth on their head , who restraine them by vertue of their authority , wherein they abuse their authority : as other gouernours may do and oft do , and yet neither liberty granted thereby to subiects , nor authority taken from gouernours . In this resemblance betwixt a sonne and a wife I desire not to be mistaken ; for I alleadge it not to make the state of a wife and a sonne all one : but to shew that those generall precepts of giuing almes , may haue their exceptions , as they which in particular handle that point , giue other examples . There must therefore be a further ground then the generall commandement of almes-giuing to proue the forenamed liberty of wiues . §. 36. Of Zipporahs case in circumcising her sonne . Obiect . 3. A wife was made to be an helpe to her husband : in those things therefore wherein he faileth , she must make supply , as Zipporah who performed a duty which belonged to her husband , and not vnto her . Answ . She may be an helpe in many other things , though this be out of her power : yea and in this also by counsell , perswasion , and other like meanes she may be a great helpe . The case of Zipporah was extraordinary , and of an vrgent present necessity , euen to saue the life of her husband . Besides , Moses was of himselfe vnable to doe it , but willing that she should doe it . Now what is this to ordinarie cases , and such cases as husbands are able enough themselues to doe , but altogether vnwilling that it should be done by their wiues ? But what if Zipporahs example herein be not warrantable ? for it doth not appeare that it was simply approued of God : God doth oft remoue temporary iudgements for the very workes sake that is done , though in the manner it be sinfully done . Instance the repentance of Ahab , 1. King. 21. 29. §. 37. Of the wife of Chuzas case in ministering to Christ . 4. Obiect . Ioanna the wife of Chuza , Herods steward , ministred vnto Christ of her substance without her husbands consent . Answ . If this could be proued it were somewhat to the purpose ; but this clause without her husbands consent ( wherein the maine state of the question consisteth ) is not in the text , nor by any good probabilitie can be gathered out of it . All the shew of probabilitie that can be shewed for it is , that Ioanna is there said to be the wife of Chuza , Herods steward . But to shew that that is nothing , let it be noted , 1. That phrase doth not imply that Chuza was then liuing . It is said that Dauid begat Salomon of the wife of Vriah , but Vriah was not then liuing : therefore the translators for perspicuitie sake doe insert these words ( her that had beene ) the wife of Vriah . So likewise Onan is commanded to goe in to his brothers wife , yet doth not this imply that his brother was then liuing . Obiect . Why should mention be made of Chuza , Herods steward , if he were not then liuing ? Answ . To shew that Ioanna was a woman of great place , whereby this fruit of her faith in following Christ was the more commended . Thus in another kinde Matthew is intitled the Publican , after he had cleane relinquisht that office , the more to commend his faith . I doe not here directly affirme that Chuza was then dead , but for ought that this phrase doth imply , he might be dead . 2. Some gather that this steward was that Ruler whose sonne Christ healed , who thereupon beleeued with all his house . Which if he were , then it cannot be doubted , but that his wife followed Christ with his good liking and consent . 3. Chuza being Herods steward , and so a man of great place , and publike imploiment , might , if he were then liuing , depute the managing of all affaires at home to his wife , as the husband of the good wife commended by Salomon , and so she might haue at least a generall consent . I doe not certainly determine any of these expresly to be so , I doe but note them as probabilities , yet such as doe sufficiently ouerthrow the surmised libertie of a wife in giuing almes without any consent of her husband : for this of all other probabilities seemeth to be most improbable . Into my heart it can neuer enter to imagine that Christ would giue such an occasion of slander vnto his enemies , as to say he caried about with him other mens wiues , without or against the consent of their husbands , and suffered them to spend the goods of their husbands vpon him . I had much rather thinke that either such women as followed him had no husbands liuing , or if they had , that they did that which they did with the consent of their husbands . §. 38. Of the * restraint of wiues about allowance for themselues or families without their husbands consent . That which hath hitherto beene deliuered concerning a wiues subiection in disposing goods , may also be applied to other things concerning her selfe , children , seruants , &c. whereof I will giue some examples . A wife hath not power to appoint what she list her selfe without or against her husbands consent , either for her owne allowance , or for her family ; she must rather rest satisfied with that which he appointeth : for he being the head , must haue the ouer-ruling stroake therein . Besides he better knoweth what may be afforded . Quest . What if an husband make himselfe poorer then he is : and the allowance which he appointeth be meaner then his meanes , and vnbeseeming his place and state ? Answ . She ought , if possiby she can by her owne instant perswasion , or any other faire meanes , moue him to that which tendeth to his honour and reputation : but if she can no way preuaile , her subiection requireth contentment and patience . §. 39. Of a wiues subiection to her husband about children . A wife may not simply without , or directly against her husbands consent , order and dispose of the children in giuing them names , apparelling their bodies , appointing their callings , places of bringing vp , mariages , or portions . 1. For giuing names to children , besides that it is throughout the Scripture for the most part enioyned to the husband , as to a Abraham , to b Zacharias , and to others , and that accordingly husbands haue ordinarily done , as c Adam , d Lamech , e Abraham , and others . It is to be noted that when there was a difference betwixt the man and his wife in giuing a childes name , he giuing one name , she another , the name which he gaue , stood ; though f Rachel named her youngest sonne Benoni , yet Beniamin ( which name Iaakob gaue ) was the childes name . So also when g Elizabeth told her friends that her childes name must be Iohn , they would not rest therein , till Zacharias had ratified that name . Yea though Ioseph were but the supposed father of Iesus , yet because he was the husband of Mary the mother of Iesus , h he had this honour giuen him , to giue the name vnto her childe . Whereas in Scripture it is sometimes said that the mothers named their children , as i Leah , k Rahel , and others , it is vpon the forenamed ground to be supposed that they had their husbands consent . 2. For appointing place and mariage it is noted that l Rebekah asked the consent of her husband : though she told her sonne Iaakob that he should goe to Haran to his vncle Laban to be there kept in safety from the fury of Esau , yet she would not send him till m Isaak had giuen his consent for his abode there , and taking a wife from thence . 3. For deputing vnto a calling , it is noted of n Annah , that though before her childe was borne she had by solemne vow dedicated him to the Lord , yet when the childe was borne she asked her husbands consent about it . 4. That which is noted of p Annahs carrying a little coat to her sonne yeare by yeare when she went vp with her husband , sheweth that she did it not without her husbands consent . Women are for the most part prone to pranke vp their children aboue their husbands place and calling , and therefore good reason that therein they should be gouerned by their husbands . Obiect . What if husbands be more forward to haue their children attired vainly and vnseemely , then wiues ? Answ . A wife must doe what she can to hinder it : if she can no way preuaile with him , she by reason of her subiection is much more excused , then he could be , if he would suffer his wife therein to haue her will. 5. The law that layeth the charge vpon husbands to giue such and such portions to his children , and the answerable practise of husbands from time to time , shew that the wife of her selfe hath not power to order them . §. 40. Of a wiues * subiection to her husband about ordering seruants and beasts . If wiues must haue their husbands consent in ordering and disposing of their children which come out of her wombe , much more of their seruants . They may not take in , or thrust out seruants against their husbands minde . In this point , as in many other , Sarah manifested her wiue-like obedience ; in that a she would not deale roughly with her maid though she were prouoked : much lesse b put her out of doores till she had made the matter knowne to her husband . Though she failed in the manner , yet in the thing it selfe she is a good example . It is further noted and approued in the c Shunemite that she asked her husbands consent about sending a seruant with her . My meaning is not that such wiues as haue seruants allowed them to attend vpon them should aske their husbands consent whensoeuer they haue occasion to vse them ; for their husbands by allowing them men for their attendance manifest their will and consent that they may vse them as they see occasion : but that they should not vse and imploy their seruants in such things as they know their husbands would dislike , except they can gaine their husbands consent . Against those particulars of children and seruants it may be obiected , that wiues are parents of their children as well as husbands , and mistresses of seruants as well as they masters , and therefore haue altogether as great power ouer them as their husbands . Answ . Indeed if the authority of the husband come not betweene , that may be granted in relation betwixt her and them : but her power being subordinate to her husbands in relation to him she hath not so great a power : the power of a wife that now we speake of is directly in relation to her husband . The like may be said of their beasts and cattell , a particular point noted also in the example of the Shunemite , who hauing occasion to vse a beast went to her husband , and said , send I pray thee with me one of the asses . §. 41. Of a wiues * subiection in entertaining strangers iournying abroad , and making vowes . If wiues may not at their pleasure vse the things appertaining to the house , much lesse may they bring strangers into the house and entertaine them without or against their husbands consent . The good Shunemite so often named as a president for good wiues , first asked her husbands consent , before she lodged a Prophet of the Lord. The same patterne is also commended vnto wiues to moue them not to iourney abroad without their husbands consent . For though that good wife had a very weighty and iust occasion to goe vnto the Prophet , yet she would not before she knew her husbands minde . As for a wiues power to make vowes , in that the law giueth an husband power to disanull her vow when he knoweth it , it implieth that she ought to haue his consent in making it , if at least she desire to haue it established , which she ought to desire , or else she mocketh God. I haue thought good to mention these particular points for illustration of a wiues subiection , because they are all of them grounded on Gods word : many other might be added to them , but these are sufficient . §. 42. Of aberrations contrary to a wiues subiection in doing things without or against their husbands consent . Now consider we the vsuall vices and aberrations contrary to those duties : the generall summe of all is , for a wife to take on her to doe what she list , whether her husband will or no , either not willing that he should know what she doth , or not caring though it be against his minde and will. Of this sort are 1. Such as priuily take money out of their husbands closets , counters , or other like places where he laieth it , neuer telling him of it , nor willing that he should know it : likewise such as after the like manner take ware out of the shop , corne out of the garner , sheepe out of the flocke , or any other goods to sell and make money of : or to giue away , or otherwise to vse so as their husbands shall neuer know , if they can hinder it . Such wiues herein sinne hainously , and that in many respects . First they disobey the ordinance of God in a maine branch of their particular calling , which is subiection . 2. They ill repay the care and paines which their husbands take for their good . Many such wiues recompence euill for good , which is a deuillish qualitie . 3. They are oft a meanes to impaire and impouerish their husbands estate . 4. They shew themselues no better then a pilfring theeues thereby . All that can be iustly and truly said for their right in the common goods , cannot defend them from the guilt of theft : they are the more dangerous by how much the more they are trusted , and lesse suspected : and their fact is so much the more hainous by how much the more deere their husbands ought to be vnto them . 5. They are a verie ill example to other inferiours in the house , for seldome hath a man a deceitfull wife , but some of the children or seruants , are made accessarie thereunto , being made her instruments to take the goods , and bestow them as she ordereth , and so are made vnfaithfull . 6. They make themselues slaues to their owne children and seruants , whom they dare not displease , lest they should tell what was done . 7. They teach their children and seruants to be theeues : for besides that such as are vsed by their mistresses to purloine for them , are thereby made accessarie to their sinne , they will also purloine for themselues , when their mistresses shall not know . So as what with the wiues purloining one way , and the childrens or seruants another way , a mans estate may be wasted as dew before the Sunne , and he not know which way . 2. Such as will haue what allowance they thinke best for themselues and family , and scornfully say , They will not be at their husbands finding : they know best what allowance is fittest for the family , and that it shall haue . Many will make their husbands eare tingle againe , yea and make the whole house ( if not the street also ) ring of it , if they thinke their allowance be not answerable to the vttermost extent of their husbands estate . This impatiencie and insolencie , as it crosseth Gods ordinance , so it maketh both their liues vncomfortable . 3. Such as cocker , attire , or any way bring vp their children otherwise then their husbands would , euen to the griefe and dishonour of their husbands : keeping them at home when their husbands , for their better education , would haue them abroad : as these sinne in hindring the good of their children , so also in not yeelding to their husbands . 4. Such as will haue their owne will about seruants , taking in , and putting out whom they please , and when they please : vsing some seruants whom they finde for their turne to the preiudice of their husbands : and carying themselues so sharply and shrewishly to others that are for their husbands turne , as a good , trustie , faithfull seruant cannot long stay in the house . 5. Such as secretly lend out their husbands horses , or other like cattell , more respecting to pleasure a vaine friend , then to please a good husband . This fault is so much the greater , when it is done to the dammage and preiudice of the husband . 6. Such as are then most frolicke and iolly , when their husbands are furthest off and cannot know it . Salomon sets it downe as a note of a strumpet , a then to tricke vp her house and to seeke for guests , when her husband is gone a iourney farre off . Then ought she to be most solitarie , and by abstaining from merrie meetings , to shew that there can be no greater dampe to her mirth , then the absence of her husband . 7. Such as thinke their houses a prison vnto them , that cannot long tarrie at home : they thinke they haue power to goe when and whither they will , and to tarrie out as long as they list , thinke their husbands of it what they will. b The Apostle layeth downe this as a marke of a wanton wife , and an idle house-wife , being idle ( saith he ) they goe about from house to house : therefore in c another place he exhorteth them to be keepers at home . The Wise-man goeth further , and maketh this to be another note of a strumpet , that d her feet cannot abide in the house : which we may see verified in e the Leuites adulterous wife , whose fearefull end was a stampe of Gods iudgement on such loose lewdnesse . 8. Such as care not how or what they binde themselues vnto without their husbands consent , or knowledge : Herein especially offend such as being seduced by Iesuites , Priests , or Friers , take the Sacrament , and thereupon by solemne vow and oath binde themselues neuer to read an English Bible , nor any Protestants bookes , no nor to goe to any of their Churches , or to heare any of their Sermons : and such most of all as enter into some Popish Nunnery , and vow neuer to returne to their husbands againe . Obiect . f Annah vowed her childe to God without her husbands consent , why may not they much more vow themselues to God ? Answ . Assuredly she was perswaded that her husband would not be against it , and so had an implicit consent : which may well be gathered , because afterwards she made it knowne to him , as both the * name giuen to the childe , and g that speech of Annah , I will bring him that he may appeare before the Lord , and there abide for euer , and the answer of her husband , h The Lord establish his word , and i his going vp with her when he was dedicated to the Lord , doe all shew . Thus farre of the first branch of a wiues submission in abstaining from doing things without her husbands consent . The second followeth , in doing the things which herequireth . §. 43. Of a wiues actiue Obedience . It is a good proofe and triall of a wiues obedience , to abstaine from doing such things as otherwise she would doe , if her husbands contrarie will did not restraine her : but yet that is not sufficient , there must be an actiue , as well as a passiue obedience yeelded . That old Law before mentioned ( thy desire shall be subiect to thine husband , and he shall rule ouer thee ) implieth so much also . If she refuse to doe what he would haue her to doe , her desire is not subiect to him , but to her selfe , neither doth he rule ouer her . This actiue part of her obedience hath respect 1. To his commandements , readily to doe what he lawfully commands . 2. To his reproofes , carefully to redresse what he iustly blameth . For the first , so farre ought a wife to be from thinking scorne to be commanded by her husband , that the very knowledge which by any meanes she hath of her husbands minde and will , ●ought to haue the force of a straight commandement with her . This readinesse to obey is commended in the wiues of Iaakob , to whom when Iaakob had declared what motiues he had to depart from their fathers house , intimating thereby that he meant to depart , and would haue them to goe with him , yet before he particularly expressed his will , they readily answered , Whatsoeuer God hath said vnto thee , doe : whereby they gaue him to vnderstand that they were ready to yeeld vnto whatsoeuer he would haue done . §. 44. Of a wiues willingnesse to * dwell where her husband will. To make this part of a wiues obedience somewhat more cleare , I will exemplifie it by two or three particular instances , recorded and approued in Gods word . The first is , that a wife ought to be willing to dwell where her husband will haue her dwell . The wiues of Abraham , Isaak , and Iaakob , herein manifested their wiue-like obedience : though their husbands brought them from their owne countrey , and from their fathers house , yet they refused not to goe with them , but dwelt in a strange countrey , and that in tents . Note in particular what Iaakobs wiues say to their husband in this case , Is there any portion or inheritance for vs in our fathers house ? implying thereby , that seeing it was their husbands pleasure to be gone , they would not any longer tarry in their fathers house , to looke for any more portion or inheritance there . These examples doe further shew that if an husband haue iust occasion to remoue from one country to another , and in those countries from place to place , his wife ought to yeeld to goe with him , if he require it at her hands . Note what the Apostle saith , haue we not power to lead about a wife ? That interrogation implieth a strong asseueration . The husband then hauing power to lead about a wife from place to place , she ought to submit her selfe to that power . This clause ( as well as other Apostles , and as the brethren of the Lord and Cephas ) sheweth , that this was not only a power which might be vsed , but which was vsed by husbands , and yeelded vnto by wiues . Obiect . The forenamed examples are extraordinary , and that vpon extraordinary occasions . Answ . Yet they may be patternes for ordinary occasions which are lawfull and warrantable . Was it not an extraordinary fact of Eliah to pray first that there might be no raine , and then againe that there might be raine ? yet is this propounded as a generall patterne to moue vs to pray for things lawfull . Now in laying downe this dutie I added the clause and caueat of iust occasion , to meet both with such as vpon discontent , or superstition , leaue the land where the true Gospell is maintained , and preached , and goe into idolatrous places : and also with such wandring giddy heads as only to satisfie their owne humour , and to see fashions , as we speake , can neuer rest in a place , but are continually remouing from countrey to countrey , and from place to place : I thinke ( to vse the words of the Apostle ) a wife is not vnder bondage in such cases . But if a man be sent of an ambassage by his Prince , or countrey : or if a Preacher or Professor be called into another countrey , as Bucer and Peter Martyr were into England in King Edwards daies ( which to this day is vsuall in other countries ) or if a man be adiudged vnto long imprisonment , and vpon these and other like occasions shall require his wife to be with him , she ought in dutie to yeeld vnto his demand . Contrary is the minde and practise of many wiues , who being affected and addicted to one place more then another , as to the place where they were bred and brought vp , where their greatest , best , and most friends dwell , and where they haue good acquaintance , refuse to goe and dwell where their husbands calling lieth , though he require , and desire them neuer so much . Thus many husbands are forced to their great dammage for peace sake to yeeld vnto their wiues , and so either to relinquish their calling , or to haue two houses ; whence it followeth , that sometimes they must neglect their seruants and calling , and sometimes be absent from their wiues , if not from their children also . Some wiues pretend that they cannot endure the smoake of the citie , other that they cannot endure the aire of the countrie : whereas indeed their owne humour and conceit stuffes them more then either citie smoake or countrie aire . I cannot call such the daughters of Sarah herein : they are not like those forenamed holy women that trusted in God , and were subiect to their husbands , but rather like to that light housewife of the Leuite , who would not dwell in her husbands house at mount Ephraim , but at her fathers house in Beth-lehem Iudah . Such wiues as I speake of , in matrimoniall chastitie may be more honest , but in wiuelike subiection are little more dutifull . Let this be taken for a fault , and it will be the sooner amended . §. 45. Of a wiues * readinesse to come to her husband when he requires it . Another particular instance of a wiues readinesse to yeeld vnto her husbands commandement is , to come to her husband when her husband requireth it , either by calling her , or sending for her . The forenamed a wiues of Iaakob being sent for to their husband in the field where he was , made no excuse , but came presently . So farre ought wiues herein to subiect their wills to their husbands , that though it may seeme to them some disparagement to come , yet if their husbands will haue it so they must yeeld , otherwise they seeme euen to b despise their husbands . Contrary is Vashtie-like stoutnesse , when wiues thinke and say , it is a seruants part to come when they are called or sent for , and they will neuer yeeld to be their husbands seruants , to come at his command . By the same reason may all duties of subiection be reiected . But for this particular , let such stout dames note the issue of Vashties stubbornnesse . As many excuses might be alleaged for her as I thinke for any : for First , she was royally descended , being the daughter of a King. Secondly , she was then among the honourable women of the kingdome . Thirdly , the King was in drinke when he sent for her . Fourthly , he sent for her to shew her beautie before multitudes of men , which was not seemely . But all these were not sufficient to excuse her fault , and free her from blame . First , though she were of royall parentage , yet she was a wife , and her husband sent for her . Secondly , being among the noble women of the kingdome , she should the rather haue shewed her selfe a patterne of subiection in this kinde . Thirdly , though he were in drinke , yet remained he an husband : and the thing which he commanded was not such but that she might haue done it without sinne . Fourthly , if she thought the thing vnseemely , she should first haue vsed all the faire meanes she could to haue beene spared ; but if by all she could not haue preuailed , then ( the thing being not simplie vnlawfull and a sinne ) she should haue yeelded . Obiect . Her fault was not in that as a wife she came not to her husband , but in that as a subiect she came not to her Soueraigne . Answ . Her fault was in both : and in the iudgement passed against her , that former was most vrged , namely that by her example all women might learne to despise their husbands . 2. Obiect . Her fact is so censured but by heathen men , that had no vnderstanding of Gods word . Answ . 1. The holy Scripture by the seuerall circumstances so distinctly noted intimateth that her rebellious fact was a notorious fault : and accordingly both * iudicious commenters , and also Preachers doe taxe her of sinfull disobedience to her husband . 2. Though they were heathen , yet they shewed what subiection is required of wiues to their husbands by the very light of nature , whereby this sinne is aggrauated . 3. Abimelech was but a heathen man , yet his sentence concerning a womans subiection in these words , he is to thee a couering of the eyes , is taken to be iudicious , and being approued by the holy Ghost , to be a good proofe . As for that particular of Uashtie , why is it so largely recorded in the Scripture but for instruction , and admonition vnto wiues ? §. 46. Of a wiues readinesse to * doe what her husband requireth . A third particular instance of a wiues readinesse to yeeld vnto her husbands commandement , is , to performe what businesse he requireth of her . When of a sudden there came three men to Abram , and he was desirous to entertaine them , he bid his wife make readie quickly three measures of meale , &c. and she did it accordingly . Ieroboam hauing a weightie occasion to send to Ahijah the Prophet , thought it meet to send by his wife , she accordingly ( though a Queene ) went : she did as her husband would haue her . Contrary is the humour of many wiues who will not doe any thing vpon command . If such a wiues husband being desirous to entertaine a friend on the sudden , shall vse Abrams phrase , make readie quickly , &c. she will say , let him come and doe it himselfe , if he will haue it so quickly done , I will not be his drudge : or if , hauing a matter of moment and secrecie , he will his wife her selfe to doe it , she will reply , I am none of your seruants ; cannot you put it to one of them , or doe it your selfe ? Yet will such wiues be ready to command their husbands to doe euery toy , and if he doe it not , they can reply , is this such a matter ? and may not a wife speake to her husband ? Were the point of obedience well learned , it would cast such wiues into another mould . These few particulars may serue for direction in many hundreds . I proceed to the other part of a wiues actiue obedience , which respecteth the reproofes of her husband . §. 47. Of a wiues * meeke taking a reproofe . The husband hauing authoritie ouer his wife , by vertue thereof he hath power , yea it is his dutie as there is needfull cause to rebuke her : By iust consequence therefore it followeth , that it is her dutie to yeeld obedience thereunto . Which ought the rather to be done because the chiefest triall of sound obedience lieth herein . For nothing goeth so much against ones stomach as reproofe : she that yeelds when she is rebuked , will much more when she is intreated . This point of obedience is manifested two waies . 1. By meeknesse in taking a reproofe . 2. By endeuour to redresse what is iustly reproued . The very point of obedience especially consisteth in this latter : the former is as a good preparatiue thereunto , without which it will hardly be done , at least not well done . Meeknesse in this case is one of the most principall fruits of that meeke and quiet spirit which S. Peter commendeth vnto wiues . Howsoeuer Rachel iustly deserued blame for comming in a fuming chafe , and with an imperious command to her husband , yet in that she meekly tooke his sharpe reproofe ( for she replied not against it , but meekly gaue a direction for the better accomplishment of her desire ) her example is commendable : commendable I say , not in the matter of her direction , but in her patient bearing of reproofe . Much wisdome may be learned hereby : for when any meekly take a reproofe , thereby they suppresse their passion , and keepe it from rising as a cloud before their vnderstanding and darkning it , and so may they better iudge of the matter reproued whether it be iust or no : and whether it need redresse or no : whereof they who are impatient of reproofe , and fret and fume against it , cannot so well iudge . The virgin Mary made good vse of Christs reprouing her , and thereby learned and taught a good point of wisdome , namely so to referre our affaires to Christ as we expect his pleasure ; and not prescribe time , meanes , manner , or any other like circumstances vnto him . Quest . What if the husbands reproofe be bitter ? Answ . He therein forgets his place , yet thereupon she must not forget her duty . If Iaakobs reproofe be well noted , we shall finde it very tart , for it is expresly said that his anger was kindle● against her , ( Gen. 30. 2. ) so as he spake in anger : the manner and forme of his words being with an interrogation , and the matter also , am I in Gods stead , &c. declare tartnesse : yet ( as was declared before ) she shewed meeknese . Quest . What if his reproofe be vniust ? 2. Answ . Yet may not meeknesse be forgotten . In such a case a wife may make a iust apologie to cleare her owne innocencie , and manifest her husbands error : but if he refuse to heare her , or will not beleeue her , then ( as S. Peter speaketh in another case ) she must endure griefe for conscience toward God. The two reasons which there he rendreth in that other case may not vnfitly be applied to this . 1. In generall this is thank-worthy , it is a grace , a glory to her : a matter that deserueth praise and commendation . 2. In particular it is acceptable to God : howsoeuer their husbands may deale roughly and vntowardly with them , yet God will graciously respect them , if they shall patiently in obedience to his ordinance beare their husbands vniust reproofes . 3. I may adde this reason also , that thus they shall shew themselues good Christians indeed , in that they are not ouercome of euill . Contrary is their minde who by no meanes will brooke a rebuke at their husbands hands : it skills not whether it be iust or vniust : if their husbands reproue them , they shall be sure to haue the reproofe rebounded backe againe vpon their faces , and that with greater violence then euer it came from them . There be some that seeme to be very good wiues till they be tried by the touch-stone of reproofe : but then though the reproofe be for matter most iust , for manner most milde , and that in priuate betwixt their husbands and themselues , yet they grow so impatient , or rather mad , as they forbeare not to giue their husbands the most scornfull speeches that they can inuent , vsing withall bitter imprecations and execrations , and threaten to drowne or hang themselues if they be crossed of their wills . Yea further , if wise husbands shall forbeare them in their passion , and after it is allaied tell them how vnbeseeming their places they carried themselues , they will seeke to iustifie themselues , and lay all the blame on their husbands for crossing them in their will : or if they cannot but see their fault , yet they will only say , it is my infirmitie : but yet euer continue in that infirmitie : and though they make shew of fearing God , yet labour not to purge this corrupt humour out of their hearts . Hence is it for the most part that contentions arise betwixt man and wife . If wiues would learne in this point to be subiect , many iarres , which from time to time arise betwixt them , would be allaied , if not preuented . Michal the wife of Dauid , and Iobs wife ( though they gaue iust occasion to be most sharply reproued , yet ) shall rise vp in iudgement against these wiues , because they were silent after they were reproued , and replied not . Salomon oft titles such as cannot beare rebuke scorners : so as hereby wiues shew that they are very scornfull . §. 48. Of a wiues * readinesse to redresse what her husband iustly reproueth in her . A further degree of obedience in bearing reproofe is , that a wife readily redresse what is iustly reproued by her husband : I say iustly , because where no fault is , there needs no amendment : patience may be needfull ( as was before shewed ) but no repentance of that which is not amisse . But where any thing is amisse , there must be a redresse . Rachel did amisse in a bringing Idols into her husbands house : her husband in b bidding her among others to put away their strange gods , reproued them all . Whereupon she with all the rest gaue to him all their strange gods . This was a good redresse . A reproofe may be iustly giuen either for a good dutie omitted ; or for an euill thing committed : and accordingly must the redresse or amendment be . A dutie formerly omitted must after the reproofe be more carefully obserued and performed , if it be a continuall dutie , and may be againe performed : otherwise the redresse is a testification of true sorrow for that fault . When an euill is committed , if any meanes can be vsed to make vp the hurt , and redresse the mischiefe that followed thereupon , it must be done : if not , sorrow as before , must be testified , and care taken that the same , or the like be not committed againe . As a good conscience requireth as much of all Christians by whomsoeuer they be reproued , so the respect which a wife oweth to an husband doth after an especiall manner require it . Otherwise her fault is doubled , 1. by continuance in her sin ; 2. by disobedience to her husband . Contrary is their spirit who for reproofe waxe the worse : being like those scorners ( of whom Salomon speaketh ) that hate those that reproue them . It is the speech of some wiues , that if their husbands would let them alone they would doe the better : but vpon rebuke they will neuer amend : the more their husbands finde fault , the more will they goe on , in doing what they doe . What other iudgement can be giuen of such , then that which the wise man giueth , there is more hope of a foole then of them . §. 49. Of a wiues * contentment with her husbands present estate . Of submission hitherto . Contentment is also a part of obedience : it hath respect to a mans outward estate and abilitie , in and with which a wife must rest satisfied and contented , whether it be high or low , great or meane , wealthy or needy , aboue , equall , or vnder that estate wherein she was before mariage : yea though a man haue beene sometimes great in estate , yet , if he decay therein , and be brought to a meane estate , she ought to rest content . Thus much Iob implieth in his replie to his wife , saying , shall we receiue good at the hand of God , and not receiue euill ? The euill he speaketh of was the losse of his goods , seruants , and children , together with other miseries that Satan through Gods permission inflicted vpon him : the receiuing of euill which he speaketh of was a resting content with it , and a patient bearing of it . Euill may be laid on any , and so they forced to beare it : but they only receiue it , who are content with it . Now in that he vseth the plurall number ( WE ) and speaking to his wife saith ( shall not we receiue euill ) he sheweth that his wife ought as well as he to haue rest contented in that poore and miserable estate : For 1. Man and wife being one flesh , by vertue of their matrimoniall vnion , both his aduancement , and also his abasement is hers : as she riseth with him , so she falleth with him . Wherefore as she is willing to be aduanced with him , so she must be content to be abased with him . 2. If at the time of mariage her husband was of meaner estate then she , she voluntarily put her selfe into that meane estate : for a wife taketh her husband ( as he her ) for better for worse , for richer for poorer . And shall she not be content with her own act ? If after mariage his estate decay , and wax meaner then it was , she is to be perswaded that by God it was so ordered , and that God aimed at her humiliation as well as his : and thereupon she ought in her dutifull submission to Gods ouer-ruling prouidence to be patient and content : this Iob implieth vnder this phrase , shall we not receiue euill at the hand of God ? and vnder this , The Lord taketh away . 3. A wiues contentment is a great ease to her husband lying vnder a crosse : and it maketh the burden seeme much lighter then otherwise it would , if at least he be a kinde husband , and affected with his wiues passion , as he ought to be . For a louing husband in euery distresse is more perplexed for his wife , then for himselfe . §. 50. Of wiues discontent at their husbands estate . Contrary is the impatiencie , and discontent of wiues at the meannesse , and ( as they thinke ) basenesse of their husbands estate : which is many waies manifested . 1. Some when they are maried finding their husbands estate weaker then they imagined , repent their mariage , and sticke not to tell their husbands , that if they had before knowne them to be no better men then they finde them to be , they should haue beene no husbands for them . Wherein first they bewray their foolish indiscretion by saying , when it is too late , if I had thought this ; and withall they manifest their own rashnesse and vnaduisednesse , in that they gaue their hands and plighted their troth to those whom they knew not . If they say , they were deceiued by their friends whom they put in trust , I answer that mariage is too weightie a matter to be wholly referred ouer to the trust of friends : euery one that yeeldeth to be maried , ought wel to know the party vnto whom in this case they yeeld : and aboue all they ought to seeke direction , helpe , and blessing from God. If notwithstanding all the meanes which possibly they could vse , they be deceiued , they are to looke vnto God , and to behold his prouidence therein : and duly to weigh whether the Lord haue crossed their desire for their humiliation , or for triall of their patience , wisdome and other like graces , or else to weine them from some vaine and worldly delights , whereunto they were too much addicted . 2. Others obseruing their husbands estate to be decaied and wasted , neuer search after the occasion , but lay all the blame vpon their husbands , and with their discontented lookes , passionate words , and impatient cariage , so vex their hearts , as they make the crosse much more heauy then otherwise it could be . Though the estate should be ouerthrowne by the vnthriftinesse of an husband , yet ought a wife to looke vnto Gods prouidence therein , as was noted before . 3. Others scorning to stoope , and to come downe to their husbands present condition , through their pride and vaine-glory are a great means to make his estate much the worse : for they , so long as by any meanes they can get it , will not abate any thing of their braue apparell , dainty cheere , rich furniture , and other like things , which are causes of great expence to their husbands : hereby also it commeth oft to passe that husbands are thought to be wealthier then indeed they are , and so greater taxations and charges then they can beare are laid vpon them for King , Countrey , Church , Poore , and the like . 4. Others , through discontent lie long lazing in their beds , or idly sit still when they are vp , and will not take any whit the more paines to raise vp and increase their husbands estate : whereby God is prouoked more and more to weaken their estates , that so he may the more punish such pride and lazinesse in wiues . §. 51. Of * cases wherein a wife ought not to forbeare what her husband forbiddeth . So much of the distinct branches of a wiues subiection . The limitation and manner of performing it next followeth . To know the limitation of a wiues obedience , and the manner how she ought to yeeld subiection vnto her husband , two things must be considered : 1. The place of an husband . 2. The place of a wife . The husbands place is noted in this phrase , as to the Lord : whereby is shewed that the husband euen by vertue of his place is to his wife in Christs stead : which is further more plainly laid downe in these words following , the husband is the head of the wife , as Christ is the head of the Church . The wiues place is intimated in these words , as the Church is subiect vnto Christ , so let wiues be to their owne husbands : whereby it is cleere that the obedience which a wife performeth to her husband must be such an obedience as the Church performeth to Christ . From the place of an husband , I gather this generall ground concerning a wiues subiection , that Subiection must be yeelded to the husband as to Christ , whence will follow two conclusions , one negatiue , which is this , The wife must yeeld no other subiection to her husband then what may stand with her subiection to Christ . The other affirmatiue , which is this , The wife must subiect her selfe to her husband in that manner that she would or should subiect her selfe to Christ . The former is a necessary condition required of all inferiours in their subiection , and obedience ( as I shewed * before ) much more in a wiues subiection to her husband , because there is of all vnequals * the least disparity betwixt husbands and wiues . Hence for our present purpose , I gather these two other more particular conclusions , The first whereof is this , 1. If God expresly command the wife any duty , and her husband will not by any meanes giue consent that she shall doe it , but forbid her , she may and ought to doe it without , or against his consent . Two cautions are warily to be obserued about this conclusion : 1. That the wife be sure that God hath commanded her that which she doth without or against her husbands consent . If she doubt , then she must stay , and for beare till she gaine his consent . When two opposite cases meet together , and the one be doubtfull , the other plaine and expresse : the doubtfull case must giue place to the more euident . Now the law of subiection is indefinite , thy desire shall be subiect to thine husband ; the extent of it is generall , in euery thing ; the only reseruation and exception is in the Lord ; wherefore if the wife be not sure that that which her husband forbiddeth her is against the Lord , she must forbeare to doe it . The second caution is that she vse all good meanes she can to gaine her husbands consent , before she doe , euen that which is commanded , against his consent . Thus shall she testifie her subiection both to God and her husband . To God , in that nothing can keepe her from doing his expresse commandement : she will rather offend her husband then God , when one of them must needs be offended . To her husband , in that she putteth it to the vttermost push , and vseth all the meanes she can to auoid his offence , in so much as he himselfe might see ( if the god of this world blinded not his eies ) that the offence is no way giuen on her part , but meerely taken on his . For proofe of this , it is without all contradiction true , that the wife is not bound to greater subiection vnto her husband then the subiect is vnto the magistrate : but a subiect ought not to forbeare a bounden duty commanded of God , because his gouernour forbids him . Instance the example of Daniel , who daily made his praiers to God , though the King had made a solemne decree that none should aske any petition of God or man within thirty daies but of the king . Instance also the Apostles , who preached the Gospel , thogh they were expresly forbiddē . Though the Scripture be plentifull in affording examples of wiues subiection , yet it is very sparing in recording examples of those who in such warrantable cases refused to be subiect , lest wiues from thence should take too great liberty . Some are recorded , but such as are either extraordinary , or not euery way instifiable . Abigails example was extraordinary , and therfore not imitable but in such like extraordinary cases . The example of Rebekah , which may seeme somewhat more pertinent , is not euery way to be iustified . For though the thing which she intended were for the substance of it very good , and ought to haue beene done , namely the blessing of Iaakob , ( for God foreshewed that the blessing appertained to Iaakob , in that he said , The elder shall serue the younger ) yet because she put not her husband in minde of Gods word , nor laboured to perswade him to fulfill the same , but went about the matter deceitfully , she cannot therein be iustified . But in the generall this example sheweth that Gods word must be yeelded vnto rather then an husbands will. For better application of this point I will lay downe some particular instances agreeable to Gods word . Suppose a wife well instructed in the true religion be maried to an idolatrous or profane husband , and he without any iust cause forbid her to goe to the Church , especially on the Lords daies , to pray in English , to read the word , to teach her children the principles of religion , to restore that which she hath vniustly and fraudulently gotten , with the like , she may , and must doe them notwithstanding . Obiect . Why may not giuing of almes be reckoned among these ? Answ . 1. Because the husband hath a greater power ouer the goods , then ouer these things . 2. Because almes-giuing is not simply commanded to all , but to such as haue wherewithall to giue : but these things are simply commanded to all . §. 52. Of cases wherein a wife ought to forbeare what her husband requireth . The other particular conclusion is this , that If an husband require his wife to doe that which God hath forbidden she ought not to doe it . Two cautions like the former are likewise to be obserued about this point . First , that she be sure ( being truly informed by Gods word ) that that which she refuseth to doe at her husbands command , is forbidden by God. Secondly , that she first labour with all meekenesse and by all good meanes that she can to disswade her husband from vrging and pressing that vpon her , which with a good conscience she cannot doe . A like proofe may be brought for this as was for the former : for we know that a wife is not bound vnto greater subiection to her husband then a sonne is vnto a father : but a sonne may in the case propounded forbeare to doe that which his father requireth and commandeth him to doe : instance the approued example of Ionathan , who refused to bring Dauid vnto Saul to be slaine , though his father commanded him so to doe . I might also instance the same in Sauls subiects and seruants , who refused to slay the Priests of the Lord at his command . Though an husband be not reckoned in particular among those to whom we are forbidden to hearken if they intice vs to idolatry , yet by the rule of relation he is implied , and by iust consequence gathered from this clause , thy friend which is as thine owne soule ; for who so deare as an husband ? To exemplifie this in some particulars as I did the former , If an husband shall command his wife to goe to Masse , to a stage play , to play at dice , to prostitute her body to vncleannes , to goe garishly and whorishly attired , to sell by scant weights , short measures , or the like , she ought not to doe so . §. 53. Of wiues faults in shewing more respect to their husbands then to God. Contrary to this limitation is on the one side a fawning flattering disposition of such wiues as seeke to please their husbands , so as they care not to displease God , ( Iezabel was such an one ; to please her husband most lewdly she did practise Naboths death ) and on the other side a fainting timorous heart which maketh them feare their husbands more then they feare God. Good Sarah , that worthy president of good wiues in other things , somewhat failed herein . Did wiues duly consider , and alwaies remember that they haue an husband ( namely Christ ) in heauen , as well as on earth , and that there is greater difference betwixt that and this husband , then betwixt heauen and earth , and that both in giuing reward , and taking reuenge , there is no comparison betwixt them , their care of pleasing , or their feare of offending their husband in heauen would be much more then of pleasing , or offending their husband on earth : if any thing were commanded or forbidden them by their husbands on earth against Christ , they would say , If I doe this , or forbeare that , I should worke falshood against mine owne soule ; for nothing can be hid from mine husband in heauen : yea I should herein obey Satan , rather then God. §. 54. Of the manner of a wiues subiection to her husband . The second generall conclusion concerning the manner of a wiues subiection , which was gathered from the place of an husband , was this , that The wife must subiect her selfe to her husband in that manner , that she would or should subiect her selfe to Christ . The particle As in this clause ( as vnto the Lord ) importeth so much . This verie conclusion is also inferred out of the place of a wife : In the same place that the Church is to Christ , a wife is to an husband : therefore such subiection as the Church yeeldeth to Christ , must a wife yeeld to her husband ; which the verie words of the Apostle doe expresly affirme . Now we know that euerie Christian wife in her particular ought to yeeld that obedience to Christ which the Church in generall doth : therefore also she must yeeld such subiection to her husband as she should to Christ . Quest . * What if an husband be an enemie of Christ ? must such subiection be yeelded to an enemie of Christ as to Christ himselfe ? Answ . Yea : because in his office he is in Christs stead , though in his heart an enemie . In this case will the wisdome , patience , and obedience of a wife be best tried . It is noted of the Church , that she is a Lilly among thornes . She remaineth Lilly-like , white , soft , pleasant , amiable , though she be ioyned with thornes , which are scraggie , prickly , sharpe : so a wife must be milde , meeke , gentle , obedient , though she be matched with a crooked , peruerse , profane , wicked husband : thus shall her vertue and grace shine forth the more clearely , euen as the stars shine forth most brightly in the darkest night . Among wiues Abigail deserueth great praise , that forgot not her dutie , though she were maried to a churlish , couetous , drunken sot , a verie Nabal in name and deed . As for those who take occasion from the wickednesse of their husbands to neglect their dutie , they adde to their crosse a curse : for a crosse it is to haue a bad husband , but to be a bad wife is a sinne , which pulleth downe a curse . Let wiues therefore remoue their eyes from the disposition of their husbands person , to the condition of his place : and by vertue thereof , seeing he beareth Christs image , be subiect to him as vnto Christ . This generall conclusion might be applied to the matter of subiection as well as to the manner , for the Church acknowledgeth Christ her superiour , feareth him inwardly , reuerenceth him outwardly , obeyeth him also both by forbearing to doe what he forbiddeth , and also by doing what he commandeth , which points hauing beene before distinctly and largely handled and applied to wiues , I will not repeat them againe . Wherefore now to insist in the manner only , there are foure vertues which are especially needfull hereunto , whereby the Church seasoneth her subiection to Christ , and wiues also may and must season their subiection to their husbands . These are the foure , 1. Humilitie , 2. Sinceritie , 3. Cheerefulnesse , 4. Constancie . §. 55. Of wiues * humilitie in euery duty . Humility is that grace that keepes one from thinking highly of himselfe aboue that which is meet : and in regard of that meane conceit which he hath of himselfe maketh him thinke reuerendly , and highly of others : so as if humility be placed in a wiues heart , it will make her thinke better of her husband then of her selfe , and so make her the more willing to yeeld all subiection vnto him . The Apostle requireth it of all Christians as a generall sawce to season all other duties : but after a peculiar maner is it needfull for inferiours : most of all for wiues , because there are * many prerogatiues appertaining to their place , which may soone make them thinke they ought not to be subiect , vnlesse they be humbly minded . That the Church doth herewith season her subiection , is cleare by the booke of Canticles , where oft she acknowledgeth her owne meannesse , and the excellency of her spouse . Therefore as the Church is humbly subiect to Christ , so let wiues be to their husbands . §. 56. Of wiues pride . Contrary is pride , which puffeth vp wiues , & maketh them thinke there is no reason they should be subiect to husbands , they can rule themselues well enough , yea and rule their husbands too , as well as their husbands rule them . No more pestilent vice for an inferiour , then this : it is the cause of all rebellion , disobedience , & disloyalty : only by pride , commeth contention . §. 57. Of Wiues * sinceritie in euery dutie . II. Sincerity is that grace that maketh one to be within euen in truth , what without he appeareth to be in shew . This is that a Singlenesse of heart which is expresly required of seruants , and may be applied to wiues , for indeed it appertaineth to all sorts . Because it is only discerned by the Lord , who is the b searcher of all hearts , it will moue a wife to haue an eye to him in all she doth , and to endeuour to approue her selfe to him aboue all : therefore vprightnesse and walking before God are oft ioyned together : he that is vpright will assuredly walke before God , that is , endeuour to approue himselfe to God , as c Noah did , and as d God commanded Abraham to doe . Though there were no other motiue in the world to moue her to subiection , yet for conscience sake to Christ she should yeeld it . e S. Peter testifieth of holy women , that they trusted in God and were subiect to their husbands : implying thereby , that their conscience to God made them be subiect to their husbands . Was not Sarahs subiection seasoned with sinceritie , when f within her selfe , in her heart she called her husband Lord ? Great reason there is that wiues should in sincerity subiect themselues : for 1. In their subiection euen to their husbands they haue to doe with Christ , in whose roome their husbands stand : so as , though their husbands who are but men , see only the face and outward behauiour , yet Christ seeth their heart and inward disposition : though their husbands see only the things which they doe before their faces , and can heare only of such things as are done before others : yet Christ seeth and knoweth the things that are done in the most secret places that can be , when no creature beside themselues is priuie thereunto : Now let it be granted that in their outward carriage they giue very good contentment vnto their husbands , and please them euery way , yet if sinceritie haue beene wanting , with what face can they appeare before Christ ? he will take another manner account of them : before Christ all their outward complement will stand them in no stead at all . 2. Herein lyeth a maine difference betwixt true , Christian , religious wiues , and meere naturall women : these may be subiect on by-respects , as namely , that their husbands may the more loue them , or liue the more quietly and peaceably with them , or that they may the more readily obtaine what they desire at their husbands hands , or for feare of their husbands displeasure and wrath , knowing him to be an angry , furious man , so as otherwise it might be worse with them , they might want many needfull things , or carry away many sore blowes if they were not subiect . But the other haue respect to Christs ordinance , whereby their husbands are made their head , and to his word and will , whereby they are commanded subiection . Thus g holy women subiected themselues ; they cannot be holy that doe not thus subiect themselues : for this is a sweet perfume that sendeth forth a good sauour into Christs nostrils , and maketh the things we doe pleasant and acceptable to him . 3. The benefit of this vertue being planted in a wiues heart is very great , and that both to her husband , and also to her selfe . To her husband , in that it will make her manifest her respect of him before others , behinde his backe , as well as before himselfe in his presence : and also will make her faithfull to him , and carefull to doe his will wheresoeuer he be , with her , or from her . To her selfe , in that it will minister inward sweet comfort vnto her , though her husband should take no notice of her subiection , or mif-interpret it , or ill requite it ; for she might say as Hezekiah did , n Remember ô Lord how I haue walked before thee in truth , and with a perfect heart , and haue done that which is good in thy sight . That the Church doth season all her subiection with sinceritie is cleare , in that she is said to be i all glorious within : ( there is no glory within , without sinceritie ) and in that she is oft said k to seeke him whom her soule loued : if her soule loued him , in sinceritie of heart she was subiect to him : Therefore as the Church is sincerely subiect to Christ , so let wiues be to their husbands . §. 58. Of wiues complementall subiection . Contrary to sinceritie is dissimulation , and meere outward , complementall subiection : when a wife doth euen despise her husband in her heart , as Michal did Dauid and yet carry a faire face before him , as that adulterous woman , who eateth , and wipeth her mouth , and saith I haue not committed iniquitie . Salomon maketh it a note of a lewd wife to flatter with her words . Though such a wife should performe all the duties named before , yet would those all be nothing to God , if they were done with a double heart , and not in singlenesse of heart . For as many outward imperfections are pardoned by God , where sinceritie is , so no outward actions are accepted of him though they seeme neuer so faire , where there is no sinceritie . §. 59. Of wiues * cheerefulnesse in euery dutie . III. Cheerefulnesse is more apparant then sinceritie , and maketh subiection the more pleasing not only to God , but also to man , who by the effects thereof may easily discerne it . For God , as he doth himselfe all things willingly and cheerefully , so he expecteth that his children should therein follow him , and thereby shew themselues his children . God loueth a cheerefull giuer : not only a cheerefull giuer of almes , but of all dutie to God and man. For men , it maketh them also much better accept any dutie when they obserue it to be done cheerefully : this did euen rauish Dauid with ioy , to see his people offer their gifts willingly vnto the Lord : when an husband seeth his wife willingly and cheerefully performe her dutie , it cannot but raise vp loue in him . This cheerefulnesse is manifested by a ready , quicke , and speedy performance of her duty . Sarahs readinesse to obey , sheweth that what she did , she did willingly . That thus the Church subiecteth her selfe to Christ is euident by that which Dauid saith , They shall be willing in the day of thy power . Therefore as the Church is cheerefully subiect vnto Christ , so let wiues be to their husbands . §. 60. Of wiues sullen and forced obedience . Contrary to this cheerefulnesse is the sullen disposition of some wiues , who will indeed be subiect to their husbands , and obey , but with such a lowring and sowre countenance , with such powting and muttering , as they grieue their husbands more in the manner , then they can be pleased with the thing it selfe that they doe : herein they shew themselues like to a curst cow , which hauing giuen a faire soape of milke , casteth all downe with her heele , and so verifie the prouerbe , A good neuer a whit as neuer the better . Such subiection is in truth no subiection , it can neither be acceptable to God , nor profitable to their husbands , nor comfortable to their owne soules . §. 61. Of wiues * constancy in doing their dutie . IIII. Constancy is a vertue which maketh all the rest perfect , and setteth the crowne vpon them ; without which they are all nothing . This is in those who after they haue begun well , continue to doe well vnto the end , and thereby reape the fruit of all . It hath respect both to continuance without intermission , and also to perseuerance without reuolting , and giuing cleane ouer . So as it is not enough to be subiect by starts and fits : one while yeelding all good obedience , another while stout and rebellious : neither is it sufficient in former times to haue beene a good wife , and after proue bad : but there must be daily proceeding and holding on from time to time , so long as husband and wife liue together . This grace was in her of whom it is said , She will doe him good , and not euill all the daies of her life . Such were all the holy wiues commended in Scripture : among other particulars , mention is made of the wife of Phinehas , who on her death-bed shewed the reuerend good respect she bare to her husband , though he were a wicked and lewd man. This grace doth the Church adde to all her other vertues , she in all parts of her subiection remaineth constant , & faithfull vnto the death , whereby it commeth to passe , that at length she receiueth the reward of her holy obedience , which is full and perfect communion and fellowship with her spouse Christ Iesus in heauen . In regard of her vnmoueable constancy it is said , that the gates of hell shall neuer preuaile against her . Therefore as the Church is constantly subiect vnto Christ , so let wiues be to their husbands . §. 62. Of wiues repenting their former goodnesse . Contrary to this Constancie is first intermission of duty , a returning to it , and a leauing it off by turnes : like one that is sicke of an ague , sometimes well , sometimes ill , one while hot , another while cold . That sometimes ceasing taketh away all the vertue , grace and glory , from sometimes doing . Besides , it is twenty to one that through the corruption of nature , that diuersitie and entercourse of fits at length will cease , and end in the worse . It is very likely that Michal was such an one : for one while she shewed her selfe so full of respect to Dauid , as for his sake she incurred the King her fathers displeasure : another while in her heart she despised him , and with her tongue taunted him . Contrary also to the forenamed Constancy is Apostasie , that is , a cleane relinquishing of the former good course , as if a wife repented her of her former good beginning . Such an one is she that is said to for sake the guide of her youth , and forget the couenant of her God. For ought we reade to the contrary , Iobs wife was such an one . And such are many who in their younger yeares , while their religious parents liued ( as Ioash while old good Iehoiada liued ) haue behaued themselues very well like good dutifull wiues , but being grown to elder yeeres , haue growne also so stout and rebellious , as if they cleane repented themselues of their former good beginning . This reuolt ariseth sometimes from the euill counsell of wicked Gossips , and sometimes from their owne proud humour . I may say of these wiues subiection , as the Prophet saith of the righteousnesse of reuolters , their subiection shall not be remembred , but in their rebellion they shall die . Therefore as the Church is subiect to Christ , let wiues be to their husbands . §. 63. Of the * extent of a wiues obedience . The extent of a wiues subiection ( which remaineth now to be handled ) is set downe vnder these generall termes ( in euery thing ) which are not so generally to be taken as if they admitted no restraint or limitation , for then would they contradict such cautions as these , in the feare of the Lord , as to the Lord , in the Lord. For man is so corrupt by nature , and of so peruerse a disposition , that oft he willeth and commandeth that which is contrary to Gods will and commandement : which when he doth , that Christian principle laid downe as a ruled case by the Apostle must take place , we ought rather to obey God then men . Quest . Why then is this extent laid downe in such generall termes ? Answ . 1. To teach wiues that it is not sufficient for them to obey their husbands in some things , as they themselues thinke meet , but in all things whatsoeuer they be wherein the husband by vertue of his superioritie and authoritie hath power to command his wife . Thus this generall extent excludeth not Gods will , but the wiues will. Shee may doe nothing against Gods will ; but many things must she doe against her owne will if her husband require her . 2. To shew that the husbands authoritie and power is very large : it hath no restraint but Gods contrary command , whereof if a wife be not assured , she must yeeld to her husbands will. §. 64. Of a wiues * labouring to bring her iudgement to the bent of her husbands . From that extent I gather these two conclusions : 1. A wife must labour to bring her iudgement and will to her husbands . 2. Though in her iudgement she cannot thinke that most meet which her husband requireth , yet she must yeeld to it in practise . In the former of these , I say not simply that a wife is bound to bring her iudgement to the bent of her husbands ; for he may be deceiued in his iudgement , and she may see his error , and then vnlesse her vnderstanding should be blinded , she cannot conceiue that to be true which he iudgeth so : but I speake of endeuour ( when she hath not sure and vndeniable grounds to the contrary ) to suspect her iudgement when its contrary to her husbands , and to thinke she may be in an error , and thereupon not be too peremptory and resolute in contradicting her husbands opinion . This submission euen of her iudgement respecteth not only things necessarie , for which her husband hath an expresse determinate warrant out of the Scripture , but also things doubtfull & indifferent : for euen so farre doth this clause ( in euery thing ) extend : and the subiection of a wife respecteth not her practise only , but her iudgement and opinion also : which if she can bring to the lawfulnesse and meetnesse of that which her husband requireth , she will much more cheerefully performe it . To this purpose ( as I take it ) may be applied that exhortation of the Apostle vnto women , that they learne in silence with all subiection : which though it be principally meant of learning in the Church , yet it excludeth not her learning at home of her husband : for in the next words he addeth , I suffer not a woman to vsurpe authoritie ouer the man , but to be in silence . §. 65. Of wiues ouerweening conceit of their owne wisdome . Contrary is the presumption of such wiues as thinke themselues wifer then their husbands , and able better to iudge matters then they can . I denie not but that a wife may haue more vnderstanding then her husband : for some men are very ignorant and blockish ; and on the other side , some women well instructed , who thereby haue attained to a great measure of knowledge , and discretion ; but many though they haue husbands of sufficient and good vnderstanding , wife and discreet men , yet thinke that that which they haue once conceiued to be a truth , must needs be so : and such is their peremptorinesse , that they wil not be brought to thinke that they may erre : but say they will neuer be brought to thinke otherwise then they doe , though all the husbands in the world should be of another opinion : not much vnlike to the Wisemans foole , who thinketh himselfe wiser then seuen men that can render a reason . §. 66. Of a wiues * yeelding to her husband in such things as she thinketh not to be the meet est . The latter conclusion concerning a wiues yeelding in practise to that which her husband requireth , though she cannot bring her iudgement to thinke as he doth about the mee●nesse of it , hath respect to indifferent things , namely , to such as are neither in their particulars commanded , nor forbidden by God : as the outward affaires of the house , ordering it , disposing goods , entertaining guests , &c. Quest . May she not reason with her husband about such matters as she thinketh vnmeet , and labour to perswade her husband not to persist in the pressing thereof , yea endeuour to bring her husband to see the vnmeetnesse ( as she thinketh ) of that which she seeth ? Answ . With modesty , humilitie , and reuerence , she may so doe : and he ought to hearken vnto her , as the husband of the Shunemite did , 2. King. 4. 23 , 24. but yet , if notwithstanding all that she can say , he persist in his resolution , and will haue it done , she must yeeld . First , her subiection is most manifested in such cases : herein she apparantly sheweth , that what she doth , she doth in respect of her husbands place , and power : were it not for that , she would not doe it . Other things are not so euident proofes of her subiection to her husband : for if he command her to doe that which God hath expresly commanded , and so she ought to doe it , whether her husband commanded it or no , it may be thought she doth it on Gods command , and not on her husbands . If her husband command her to doe that which God hath expresly forbidden , then ought she by no meanes to yeeld vnto it : if she doe , it may rather be termed a ioint conspiracie of husband and wife together against Gods will ( as S. Peter said to Sapphira the wife of Ananias , How is it that ye haue agreed together to tempt the spirit of the Lord ? ) then subiection to the image of God in her husband . Secondly , her yeelding in indifferent things tendeth much to the peace of the family , as subiects yeelding to their Magistrates in such cases maketh much to the peace of the Common wealth . For in differencies and dissentions one side must yeeld , or else great mischiefe is like to follow : now of the two , who should yeeld but the inferiour ? §. 67. Of wiues making their owne will their law . Contrary is the custome of many wiues , who neuer will doe any more then they themselues thinke meet , though their husbands require it neuer so much : surely they come farre short of this Apostolicall extent ( in euery thing ) though in their own eies they may seeme to be very much subiect . But when wiues will no further be subiect , then their owne iudgments , wils and affections concurre with their husbands , what can be thought but that they are subiect rather to their owne wils , then to the will of their husbands ? Many such wiues , from the least difference in iudgement & opiniō , euen in the smallest matters , take occasion to refuse subiection , and thinke they haue warrant enough so to doe : whence oftentimes there ariseth much contention , the fault whereof lieth especially on the wiues necke , though the occasion may arise from the husband : and I thinke that wiues themselues would so iudge of the like cases betwixt them and their children . §. 68. Of care in choosing such husbands as wiues may without griefe be subiect vnto . Obiect . If the case be such betwixt man and wife , it is not good to marry . Answ . This is no good inference ; for all the seeming hardnesse of a wiues case is in the lewdnesse of an husband , who abuseth his place and power : and not in that subiection which is required by God. For if an husband carry himselfe to his wife as God requireth , she will finde her yoke to be easie , and her subiection a great benefit euen vnto her selfe . Wherefore I would exhort parties that are vnmaried , whether maidens or widowes , to be very carefull in their choise of husbands : and in their choise to respect aboue all , their good qualities and conditions , therein bearing the image of Christ , as well as in their office , and authoritie : so as their wiues may with ioy and comfort , not with griefe and anguish , be subiect vnto them : then will subiection proue a vexation , when the husband is an ignorant , profane , idolatrous , worldly , wicked man : wiues of such husbands are oft brought into many straits . Ye widowes and maidens who are free , be not too free and forward in giuing your consent to whom you know not : among other motiues , oft thinke of this point of subiection , to which all wiues are bound : this I say , both of the seuerall branches , and also of the extent thereof . After you are maried it is in vaine to thinke of freedome from subiection . By taking husbands , and giuing your selues to be wiues , you binde your selues to the law of the man , as long as he liueth . Then as you desire to be accepted of God , and to finde mercy and comfort from him , you must beare this yoke , how heauy and grieuous soeuer it seeme to be . §. 69. Of the reasons to moue wiues to doe their duties . Hitherto of wiues duties : The reasons noted by the Apostle to enforce those duties now follow . They are laid downe in these words . EPHES. 5. 22. — As vnto the Lord. Vers . 23. For the husband is the head of the wife , euen as Christ is the head of the Church : and he is the Sauiour of the bodie . Vers . 24. Wherefore as the Church is subiect , &c. THe maine ground of all the reasons which the Apostle here intimateth , is taken from the place wherin God hath set an husband , which is first by consequence implied in these words , as to the Lord : and then more plainly and directly expressed in these , the husband is the head of the wife . The particle prefixed before these words ( for ) being a causall coniunction , doth shew , that they are here set downe as a reason , which is first propounded vnder a metaphor ( head ) and then amplified by that resemblance which an husband hath therein vnto Christ ( euen as Christ , &c. ) which resemblance is further commended by the vertue and benefit that proceedeth from the head-ship of Christ properly , and of an husband also by consequence , in these words ( and is the Sauiour of the bodie . ) Vpon an husbands resemblance vnto Christ , he inferreth that a wife should haue a resemblance vnto the Church , and so concludeth , Therefore as the Church is in subiection to Christ , so let wiues be to their husbands . Out of the forenamed ground of a wiues subiection , and the seuerall amplifications thereof , and the inference thereupon made , fiue seuerall and distinct reasons may be gathered to enforce a wines subiection to her husband . The first is taken from an husbands place : he is in the Lords stead to his wife ( as to the Lord. ) The second from his office : he is an head to his wife . The chird from the image he beareth , or from the resemblance betwixt him and Christ ( euen as Christ &c. ) The fourth from the benefit that his wife receiueth from him ( he is the Sauiour &c. ) The fift from the example and patterne of the Church ( as the Church is in subiection , &c. ) § 70. Of an husbands place . The place wherein God hath set an husband as it serueth to direct a wife in the manner of her subiection , whereof I haue spoken * before , so also it serueth to moue a wife to yeeld such subiection as is required : which will euidently appeare by these two conclusions following from thence . 1. A wife by subiecting her selfe to her husband , therein is subiect vnto Christ . 2. A wife by refusing to be subiect vnto her husband , therein refuseth to be subiect vnto Christ . That these two conclusions are rightly and iustly gathered from the forenamed ground I proue by like conclusions which the holy Ghost inferreth vpon the like ground . It is euident that Christ Iesus , euen incarnat and made flesh , was in the roome and stead of his father , whereupon Christ said to Philip that desired to see the father , he that hath seene me hath seene the father : Now marke what Christ thence inferreth both on the one side ( he that receiueth me receiueth him that sent me ) and on the other ( he that honoureth not the sonne , honoureth not the father that sent him . ) It is also euident that Ministers of the Gospell stand in the roome and stead of Christ : for thus saith the Apostle of himselfe and other Ministers , we are ambassadors for Christ , as though God did beseech you by vs , we pray you in Christs stead , &c. Now marke againe the conclusions inferred thereupon by Christ , on the one side , he that heareth you , heareth me , and on the other , he that despiseth you , despiseth me . On this ground it was that God said to Samuel concerning the people that reiected his gouernment , they haue not cast thee away , but they haue cast me away . To apply this reason , I hope such wiues as liue vnder the Gospell haue so much religion and piety in them as to acknowledge , it becommeth them well to be subiect vnto the Lord Christ Iesus : here then learne one especiall and principall part of subiection vnto Christ , which is to be subiect vnto your husbands : thus shall you shew your selues to be the wiues of the Lord Christ , as the Apostle saith of obedient seruants , they are the seruants of God. Againe I hope none are so void of all religion and piety as to refuse to be subiect vnto Christ : here then take notice , that if wilfully yee refuse to be subiect to your husbands , yee wilfully refuse to be subiect to Christ : fitly on this ground may I apply that to wiues , which the Apostle speaketh of subiects , whosoeuer resisteth the power and authority of an husband , resisteth the ordinance of God : and they that resist shall receiue to themselues iudgement . A strong motiue is this first motiue . If it were duly considered of wiues , they would more readily , and cheerefully be subiect , then many are ; they would not so lightly thinke of their husbands place , nor so reproachfully speake against Gods Ministers who plainly declare their duty vnto them , as many doe . §. 71. Of an husbands office . The second reason is like vnto this taken from an husbands office , he is the wiues head : which is also vrged to this very purpose in other places . This metaphor sheweth that to his wife he is as the head of a naturall body , both more eminent in place , and also more excellent in dignity : by vertue of both which , he is a ruler and gouernour of his wife . Nature teacheth vs that this is true of the head of a naturall body : and the Apostle by intituling an husband , an head , teacheth vs that it is as true of an husband : whence it followeth , that it standeth with common equity , and with the light of nature , that the wife should be subiect to her husband . This argument doth the Apostle in plaine termes vrge in another place , saying , doth not nature teach you , &c. Goe therefore , ô wiues , vnto the schoole of nature , looke vpon the outward parts and members of your bodies . Doe they desire to be aboue the head ? are they loth to be subiect vnto the head ? Let your soule then learne of your body . Were it not monstrous for the side to be aduanced aboue the head ? If the body should not be subiect to the head , would not destruction follow vpon head , body , and all the parts thereof ? As monstrous , and much more monstrous is it for a wife to be aboue her husband : and as great , yea and greater disturbance and ruine would fall on that family . The order which God hath set therein would be cleane ouerthrowne thereby : and they that ouerthrow it would shew themselues oppugners of Gods wisdome in establishing order . This reason drawne from nature is of force to moue very Pagans , and Sauages to yeeld subiection , how much more Christian wiues , it being also agreeable to Gods word , and ratified thereby ? §. 72. Of the resemblance betwixt Christ and an husband . The third reason taken from an husbands resemblance vnto Christ herein , addeth an edge vnto that former reason : in being an head , he is like Christ . So as there is a kinde of fellowship and copartnership betwixt Christ , and an husband : they are brethren in office , as two kings of seuerall places . Obiect . There is no equality betwixt Christ the Lord from heauen , and an earthly husband : the disparity betwixt them is infinite . Answ . Yet there may be similitude , resemblance , and fellowship : inequality is no hinderance to these . Two kings may be more different in estate then a subiect and a king ; yet those two kings brethren and fellowes in office . There may be a resemblance where there is no parity , and a likenesse where there is no equality . The glorious and bright Sunne in the firmament , and a dimme candle in an house , haue a kinde of fellowship , and the same office , which is to giue light : yet there is no equality betwixt them . So then an husband resembleth not only the head of a naturall body , but also the glorious image of Christ , and is that to his wife which Christ is to his Church . To apply this point , marke how from it two positions ( worthy to be noted ) doe arise . 1. Subiection is due to an husband as well as to Christ . I say not as great , because of the difference in glory : but as well , because of the likenesse in office . A Constable ( though a poore meane man ) must be obeyed as well as an high sherife : A beggars childe must obey his father , as well as a kings childe . Such wiues therefore who are not subiect , wrong their husbands , as well as they wrong Christ who are not subiect to him . 2. They who by their subiection maintaine the honour of their husbands place , maintaine thereby the honour of Christs place : and againe by the rule of contraries , They who by refusing to be subiect impeach the honour of their husbands place , impeach thereby the honour of Christs place . The obedience of a poore mans childe or seruant iustifieth that obedience which kings children and seruants owe their father and soueraigne : and so on the contrary , disobedience in meane ones , dishonoureth the place of great ones . The argument of Memucan drawne from the greater to the lesse ( in these words , Vashty the Queene hath not done wrong to the king only , but also to all the princes , and all the people ) may be applied from the lesse to the greater . Disobedient wiues doe wrong not only to their owne particular husbands , but also to all heads , euen to Christ the head of the Church . If a naturall body , and the Church were flexible , and could be seduced , and drawne to presume , and rebell against their heads , the ill example of wiues were enough to moue them thereunto , for , as much as in them lieth , they by example seduce them . From the last forenamed positions ( viz. that the obedience of a good wife maintaineth the honour of Christs place , and on the contrary side that the disobedience of an ill wife impaireth the honour thereof ) I may iustly inferre two other conclusions . 1. That Christ will assuredly reward the good subiection of good wiues : for he hath said ( and what he hath said he can and will performe ) them that honour me will I honour . 2. That he will sorely reuenge the rebellion of euill wiues : for againe he hath said , they that despise me , shall be despised . We know that fellowes in office are ready to stand for the credit of one anothers place , and to maintaine the honour thereof : and that not without good reason : for thereby they maintaine their owne honour and credit . Wherefore as good wiues may well expect a reward at Christs hands , howsoeuer their husbands respect their obedience , whether well or ill : ( a great incouragement for wiues to performe their duties , though their husbands be neuer so ill ) so euill wiues haue iust cause to feare reuenge at Christs hand , how soeuer their husbands beare with them . They who duly weigh this reason taken from that resemblance which is betwixt Christ and the Church , cannot but hold it to be a motiue of great moment . §. 73. Of the benefit which a wife hath by an husband . The fourth reason taken from the benefit which a wife receiueth from her husband , doth yet further presse the point in hand . Though Christ be properly the Sauiour of the bodie , yet euen herein an husband carieth a resemblance of Christ , and is after a manner a Saniour : for by vertue of his place and office he is on the one side her protector , to defend her from hurt , and preserue her from danger ; and on the other side , a pronider of all needfull and necessarie things for her : in which respect she is taken from her parents and friends , and wholly committed to him : ( as Iaakobs wiues said , Haue we any more portion or inheritance in our fathers house ? ) yea she her selfe , and all she hath is giuen to him : and he againe communicateth what soeuer he hath to her good , and for her vse . Dauid compareth a wife to a Vine , in relation to her husband : intimating thereby , that by him she is raised to that height of honour she hath , as a vine by the tree , or frame neere vnto which it is planted . By his honour is she dignified , by his wealth is she enriched . He is , vnder God , all in all to her ; in the family he is a King to gouerne and aid her , a Priest to pray with her and for her , a Prophet to teach and instruct her . As the head is placed in the highest place ouer the bodie , and vnderstanding placed in it , to gouerne , direct , protect , and euerie way seeke the good of the bodie , and as Christ is vnited to the Church as a spouse , and made her head , that she might be saued , maintained , and prouided for by him ; so for this end was an husband placed in his place of superioritie ; and his authoritie was committed to him , to be a Saniour of his wife . Wherefore if none of the former motiues preuaile with wiues , and moue them to be subiect to their husbands , yet ought this . For from this reason flow these two conclusions . 1. The subiection required of a wife is for her owne good . 2. In refusing to obey she sheweth her selfe both vngratefull to her husband , and also iniurious to her selfe . That her subiection is for her owne good , is euident by this end for which an husband is made an head , to be a Saniour : not to puffe him vp , to make him insult and tyrannize ouer his wife . So as if she be subiect vnto him , she may reape much good from him . As the Church is wisely gouerned , and safely protected by subiecting her selfe to her head Christ Iesus ; and as the body partaketh of much good , and is preserued from much euill by subiecting it selfe to the head , so if a wife be subiect to her husband , she will fare much the better thereby , all the ease , profit , and benefit thereof will be hers . If therefore she tender her owne good , this is a way and meanes ordained of God for this end ; let her herein seeke it . If notwithstanding this she refuse to be subiect vnto her husband , doth she not ( as we say ) stand in her owne light ? She being by her sex the weaker , and the more vnable to helpe her selfe , ●f she shall reiect this good helpe which God hath prouided for her , is she not most iniurious to her owne selfe ? And considering the care and pains her husband vndergoeth for her sake , is it not most vnnaturall and monstrous ingratitude , inwardly to de●pise , or outwardly to scorne such an head ? No better testimony ●f a gratefull heart can be giuen by a wife to her husband , then ●heerefull and ready subiection : and no greater ingratitude can ●e shewed , then rebellion , and disdaine . Now among vices in●ratitude is one of the most odious to God and man : so as both ●o auoid the blacke spot of ingratitude , and to carry away the ●ame of gratefulnesse , ought wiues to be subiect . §. 74. Of the example of the Church set before wines . The last reason taken from the example of the Church is also ●f good force to perswade wiues vnto subiection . Example more ●reuailes with many then precept . If any example may be of ●orce , then this most of all : for it is not the example of one only , ●ut of many ; not of many ignorant , and wicked persons , but of understanding , wise , holy and righteous persons , euen all the ●aints that euer were , are , or shall be : for the Church compriseth ●●l vnder it , euen that whole society of Saints , which are chosen of God in his eternall counsell , redeemed of Christ by his precious bloud , and effectually called by the Gospell of faluation , Gods spirit working inwardly and powerfully vpon them , those very soules of iust and perfect men now triumphing in heauen , not excepted : note how this Church is described in the 26 , and 27. verses . Let this example therefore be oft thought of : it will neuer repent any to follow it : for it treadeth the only right path to eternall glory , whereunto they shall assuredly come that follow it . But to shew the force of this reason a little more distinctly , note these two conclusions following from it . 1. Wiues are as much bound to be subiect to their husbands , as the Church to Christ . Else why should this example be thus set before them , and pressed vpon them ? why are husbands set in Christs stead , and resembled to him ? 2. A wiues subiection to her husband , answerable to the Churches subiection vnto Christ , is an euidence that she is of the Church , guided by the same Spirit that the Church is . For it cannot be performed by the power of nature , it is a supernaturall worke , and so an euidence of the Spirit . Wherefore , ô Christian wiues , as your husbands by their place resemble Christ , so doe you by your practise resemble the Church . Of the two this is the more commendable : for that is a dignitie , this a vertue : but true vertue is much more glorious then any dignitie can be . These reasons being well poised , and the force of them all ioyned together , they cannot but worke on the stoutest stomacke that is : wherefore if this point of subiection seeme to be too bitter a pill to be well digested , let it be sweetned with the syrupe of these reasons , and it will much better be swallowed , and haue the more kindly worke . The fourth Treatise . Husbands Particular Duties . §. 1. Of the Generall Heads of this Treatise . EPHES. 5. 25 , &c. Husbands loue your owne wiues , euen as Christ also loued the Church , &c. AS the wife is to know her dutie , so the husband much more his , because he is to be a guide , and good example to his wife , he is to dwell with her according to knowledge , ( 1 Pet. 3. 7. ) the more eminent his place is , the more knowledge he ought to haue how to walke worthy thereof . Neglect of dutie in him is more dishonourable vnto God , because by vertue of his place he is a the Imag eand glory of God , and more pernicious not to his wife only , but also to the whole family , because of that power and authority he hath , which he may abuse to the maintenance of his wickednesse , hauing in the house no superiour power to restraine his fury : whereas the wife , though neuer so wicked , may by the power of her husband be kept vnder , and restrained from outrage . Wherefore to goe on in order , in laying downe the husbands duties ( as we haue the wiues ) we are to consider , 1. The Duties themselues . 2. The reasons to inforce them . In setting downe the duties we must note 1. The matter wherein they consist . 2. The manner how they are to be performed . The Apostle compriseth the whole matter of them all vnder Loue , which is the summe and head of all . This we will first handle : and then proceed to other particulars . §. 2. Of that * loue which husbands owe their wiues . This head of all the rest , Loue , is expresly set downe , and alone mentioned in this , and in many other places of Scripture , whereby it is euident , that all other duties are comprised vnder it . To omit other places , where this dutie is vrged in b this place , Loue is foure times by name expressed , beside that it is intimated vnder many other termes and phrases . Whosoeuer therefore taketh a wife , must , in this respect that she is his wife , loue her : as it is noted of Isaak ( the best patterne of husbands noted in the Scripture ) c he tooke Rebekah , she was his wife ana he loued her . Many good reasons hereof may be rendred . 1. Because no dutie on the husbands part can be rightly performed except it be seasoned with loue . The Apostle exhorteth all Christians to doe all their things in loue : much more ought husbands : though in place they be aboue their wiues , yet loue may not be forgotten . 2. Because of all persons on earth a wife is the most proper obiect of loue : nor friend , nor childe , nor parent ought so to be loued as a wife : she is termed , the wife of his bosome , to shew that she ought to be as his heart in his bosome . 3. Because his place of eminency , and power of authority may soone puffe him vp , and make him insult ouer his wife , and trample her vnder his feet , if a intire loue of her be not planted in his heart . To keepe him from abusing his authority is loue so much pressed vpon him . 4. Because wiues through the weaknesse of their sex ( for they are the weaker vessels ) are much prone to prouoke their husbands . So as if there be not loue predominant in the husband , there is like to be but little peace betwixt man and wife . Loue couereth a multitude of imperfections . 5. Because as Christ by his loue first manifested prouoketh the Church to loue him , so an husband by louing his wife should prouoke her to loue him againe : shewing himselfe like the Sunne which is the fountaine of light , and from which the Moone receiueth what light she hath : so he should be the fountaine of loue to his wife . Obiect . Loue was before laid downe as a common dutie appertaining both to man and wife : how is it then here required as a particular and peculiar dutie of an husband ? Answ . In regard of the generall extent of loue it is indeed a common dutie belonging to the one as well as to the other , yea belonging to all Christians , to all men : for it is the very nature of loue , and an especiall property thereof , to seeke not her owne things , but the good of others , which all are bound to doe by vertue of the bond of nature ; more then others , Christians by vertue of the bond of the spirit : among Christians , especially wiues and husbands by vertue of the matrimoniall bond : of maried couples , most of all husbands by vertue of their place and charge . Their place is a place of authoritie , which without loue will soone turne into tyrannie . Their charge is especially and aboue all , to seeke the good of their wiues : as wiues are the chiefest , and greatest charge of husbands , so their chiefest and greatest care must be for them : the parents and friends of wiues as they giue ouer all their authority to their husbands , so they cast all care vpon them : wherefore that husbands may take the more care of their wiues , and the better seeke their good , they ought after a peculiar manner to loue them . Husbands are most of all bound to loue : and bound to loue their wiues most of all . Thus this affection of loue is a distinct dutie in it selfe , peculiarly appertaining to an husband : and also a common condition which must be annexed to euery other dutie of an husband , to season and sweeten the same . His looke , his speech , his carriage , and all his actions , wherein he hath to doe with his wife , must be seasoned with loue : loue must shew it selfe in his commandements , in his reproofes , in his instructions , in his admonitions , in his authoritie , in his familiaritie , when they are alone together , when they are in company before others , in ciuill affaires , in religious matters , at all times , in all things : as salt must be first and last vpon the table , and eaten with euery bit of meate , so must loue be first in an husbands heart , and last out of it , and mixed with euery thing wherein he hath to doe with his wife . §. 3. Of an husbands hatred and want of loue . Contrary hereunto is hatred of heart : which vice as it is very odious and detestable in it selfe , so much more when the wife is made the obiect thereof . As loue prouoketh an husband to doe his wife what good he can , so hatred , to doe her what mischiefe he can . Moses noteth a mans hatred of his wife to be a cause of much mischiefe : for the neerer , and dearer any persons be , the more violent will that hatred be which is fastened on them . Hence was it that a diuorce was suffered to be made betwixt a man and his wife , in case he hated her : which law questionlesse was made for releefe of the wife , lest the hatred which her husband conceiued against her should worke her some mischiefe , if he were forced to keepe her as his wife : which Christ seemeth to imply in these words , Moses , because of the hardnesse of your hearts , suffered you to put away your wines . This therefore being so pestilent a poison , let husbands take heed how they suffer it to soake into them . Neither is it sufficient for an husband not to hate his wife , for euen the want of loue , though it be only a priuation , yet is it a great vice , and contrary also to the forenamed dutie of loue . Where this want of loue is , there can be no duty wel performed , euen as when the great wheele of a clocke , the first mouer of all the rest , is out of frame , neuer a wheele can be in good order . They that thinke lightly hereof , plainly discouer that there is little or no loue of God in them at all : for if the Apostles inference be good , taken from a mans neighbour or brother whom he hath seene , it will much more be good hauing relation to a wife : for how can he who loueth not his wife , ( whom God hath giuen to him as a token of his fauour , and as an helpe meet for him , to be in his bosome , and euer in his sight , yea to be no more two , but one flesh ) loue God whom he hath not seene ? If any man saith , he loueth God , and hate his wife , he is a lier . Let husbands therefore by louing their wiues giue euidence that they loue God. §. 4. Of an husbands * wise maintaining his authoritie . All the branches which grow out of this root of loue , as they haue respect to husbands duties , may be drawne to two heads : 1. A wise maintaining of his authoritie . 2. A right managing of the same . That these two are branches of an husbands loue , is euident by the place wherein God hath set him , which is a place of authoritie ; for the best good that any can doe , and so the best fruits of loue which he can shew forth to any , are such as are done in his owne proper place , and by vertue thereof . If then an husband relinquish his authoritie , he disableth himselfe from doing that good , and shewing those fruits of loue which otherwise he might . If he abuse his authoritie , he turneth the edge and point of his sword amisse : in stead of holding it ouer his wife for her protection , he turneth it into her bowels to her destruction , and so manifesteth thereby more hatred then loue . Now then to handle these two seuerally , and distinctly : I. That an husband ought wisely to maintaine his authoritie , is implied vnder this Apostolicall precept , Husbands dwell with your wiues according to knowledge , that is , as such as are well able to maintaine the honour of that place wherein God hath set you : not as sots and fooles without vnderstanding . The same is also implied vnder the titles of preheminence which the Scripture attributeth to husbands , as Lord , Master , head , guide , image and glory of God , &c. The honour and authoritie of God , and of his Sonne Christ Iesus , is maintained in and by the honour and authoritie of an husband , as the Kings authoritie is maintained by the authoritie of his Priuy Councell and other Magistrates vnder him ; yea , as an husbands authoritie is in the family maintained by the authoritie of his wife : ( for as the man is the glory of God , so the woman is the glory of the man. ) The good of the wife her selfe is thus also much promoted , euen as the good of the body is helped forward by the heads abiding in his place ; should the head be put vnder any of the parts of the body , the body and all the parts thereof could not but receiue much dammage thereby : euen so the wife and whole family would feele the dammage of the husbands losse of his authoritie . 1. Quest . Is it in the power of the husband to maintaine his owne authoritie ? Answ . Yea , in his more then in any others : for note the counsell of the Apostle to Timothie , ( though in another case , yet very pertinent to this purpose ) Let no man despise thy youth . It was therefore in Timothies power to maintaine his honour , and not to suffer it to be despised ; and so is it in an husbands power . 2. Quest . How may an husband best maintaine his authoritie ? Answ . That direction which the Apostle giueth to Timothie to maintaine his authoritie , may fitly be applied for this purpose vnto an husband ; Be an ensample in conuersation , in loue , in spirit , in faith , and in purenesse : as if he had said , If thou walke before them worthy of thy place and calling , and worthy of that honour and respect which is due thereunto , shewing forth the fruits of loue , faith , and other like graces , assuredly they will reuerence thy youth ; but if otherwise thou carrie thy selfe basely , and not beseeming a minister , thou giuest them iust occasion to despise thee . Euen thus may husbands best maintaine their authoritie by being an ensample in loue , grauitie , pietie , honesty , &c. The fruits of these and other like graces shewed forth by husbands before their wiues and family , cannot but worke a reuerend and dutifull respect in their wiues and whole house towards them : for by this means they shall more cleerely discerne the image of God shine forth in their faces . Obiect . Very goodnesse and grace it selfe is hated of wicked and vngodly wiues : it was an act of pietie that made Michal despise Dauid . Answ . 1. Grant it to be so : yet this may be a good direction for such husbands as haue not such wicked wiues . 2. This doth not alwaies so fall our , no , nor yet for the most part in those that are wicked ; true vertue and integritie doth oft cause admiration in such as loue it not . 3. Though some be of so crooked and peruerse a disposition as to take occasion of contempt , where none is giuen , yet shall that husband iustifie himselfe before God and man , that carryeth himselfe worthy of his place . §. 5. Of husbands losing their authoritie . Contrary is their practise who by their profanenesse , riotousnesse , drunkennesse , lewdnesse , lightnesse , vnthriftinesse , and other like base carriage , make themselues contemptible , and so lose their authoritie : though a wife ought not to take these occasions to despise her husband , yet is it a iust iudgement on him to be despised , seeing he maketh himselfe contemptible . Contrary also to the forenamed directions is the sterne , rough , and cruel carriage of husbands , who by violence and tyranny goe about to maintaine their authority . Force may indeed cause feare , but a slauish feate , such a feare as breedeth more hatred then loue , more inward contempt , then outward respect . And contrary is their seruile disposition , who against their owne iudgement yeeld to the bent of their wiues minde in such things as are vnlawfull : they will lose their authority rather then giue discontent to their wiues : which is a fault expresly forbidden by the a law : and yet a fault whereinto not only wicked b Ahab , but also wise Salomon fell : how heinous a fault , and how grieuous a fall this was in Salomon , the fearefull issue thereof sheweth . Like to him not in wisdome , but in this point of egregious folly , are such as vpon their wiues instigation , suffer Priests and Iesuites , to lurke and celebrate Masses in their houses , and yeeld to be present thereat themselues . Like to Ahab are such Magistrates as suffer their wiues to ouersway them in course of Iustice : hence it commeth to passe that more petitions and suites are made to the wiues of Magistrates in the cases of Iustice then to the Magistrates themselues : and the fauour of their wiues is more esteemed then their owne : so as the power of gouerning , and the maine stroke in determining matters , is from their wiues ; they are but the mouthes and instrument of their wiues , in so much as among the common people the title of their places and offices is giuen to their wiues . Some husbands suffer this by reason of their fearefull , and foolish disposition , wanting courage and wisdome to maintaine the honour of their places against the insolency of their wiues : others vpon a subtil , couetous , wicked minde , that by the meanes of their wiues there may be more freedome for receiuing bribes . Among these I may reckon those who against their owne minde , to satisfie their wiues minde , suffer both wiues and children to follow the fashion , to attire themselues vnbeseeming their places , to frequent light company , with the like ; and also those who vpon their wiues importunitie are moued ( as Sampson was ) to reueale such secrets as are not meet to be knowne . Husbands may hearken to their wiues mouing good things , but they may not obey them in euill things : if they doe , their fault is double : 1. in doing euill : 2. in losing their authoritie . Let husbands therefore be very watchfull against their wiues euill instigations . Satan laboured to supplant Iob by his wife : and by this doth he subuert many in these daies . §. 6. Of husbands * high account of wiues . As authority must be well maintained , so must it be well managed : for which purpose two things are needfull : 1. That an husband tenderly respect his wife . 2. That prouidently he care for her . An husbands tender respect of his wife is Inward . Outward .   Inward in regard of his Opinion of her . Affection to her .   Outward in regard of his cariage towards her . For an husbands opinion of his wife , two things are to be weighed , Her place , Her person .   1. Her place is indeed a place of inferiority , and subiection , yet the neerest to equality that may be : a place of common equity in many respects , wherein man and wife are after a sort euen fellowes , and partners : Hence then it followeth that The husband must account his wife a yoke-fellow and companion . This is one point of giuing honour to the wife : and it is implied vnder that phrase wherby the end of making a wife is noted , which in our English is translated , meet for him , word for word as before him that is , like himselfe , one in whom he might see himselfe , or euen ( to vse our Apostles word ) himselfe . These phrases imply a kinde of fellowship : as also the many prerogatiues that are common to both , which haue beene noted * before . As a wiues acknowledgement of her husbands superiority is the ground-worke of all her duties , so an husbands acknowledgement of that fellowship which is betwixt him and his wife , will make him carry himselfe much more amiably , familiarly , louingly , and euery way as beseemeth a good husband towards her . §. 7. Of that fellowship which is betwixt man and wife , notwithstanding a wiues inferiority . Obiect . Fellowship betwixt man and wife cannot stand with a wiues inferiority and subiection . Answ . They are of very meane capacity that cannot see how these may stand together . Is there not a fellowship betwixt superiour and inferiour magistrates in relation to their subiects ? yea the Scripture mentioneth a fellowship betwixt Christ the head and other Saints in relation to the glory whereof all are made partakers ( for it termeth vs ioynt heires with Christ : ) and in relation to Gods people a fellowship betwixt God and his ministers ( for it termeth them labourers together with God ) yet none can denie the Saints , and ministers to be inferiour and in subiection to Christ , and God. But distinctly to answer the obiection . 1. There may not only be a fellowship , but also an equality in some things betwixt those that in other things are one of them inferiour and subiect : as betwixt man and wife in the power of one another bodies : for the wife ( as well as the husband ) is therein both a seruant , and a mistresse , a seruant to yeeld her body , a mistresse to haue the power of his . 2. There may be fellowship in the very same things wherein is inferiority : for fellowship hath respect to the thing it selfe , inferiority to the measure , and manner : as in giuing light the Sunne and Moone haue a fellowship , but in the measure and manner the Moone is inferiour : the Moone hath not so much light as the Sunne , and that which it hath it hath from the Sunne : and as in gouerning , the king and other magistrates haue a fellowship , but in the measure , and manner of gouernment they are inferiour to him : Euen so is it betwixt man and wife , in many things wherein there is a fellowship , the wife is notwithstanding inferiour : so as inferiority may stand with fellowship . 3. There are no vnequals betwixt which there is so neere a parity as betwixt man and wife : if therefore there may be a fellowship betwixt any that are superiour , and inferiour one to another , then much more betwixt man and wife . * As the soule therefore ruleth ouer the body , by a mutuall and louing consent and agreement , so must a man ouer his wife . §. 8. Of husbands too meane account of wiues . Contrary is the conceit of many who thinke there is no difference betwixt a wife and seruant but in familiarity : and that wiues were made to be seruants to their husbands , because subiection , feare and obedience are required of them : whence it commeth to passe that wiues are oft vsed little better then seruants . A conceit and practise sauouring too much of heathenish , and sottish arrogancy . Did God at first take the wife out of mans side , that man should tread her vnder his feet ? or rather that he should set her at his side next to him aboue all children , seruants , or any other in the family , how neere , or deare vnto him soeuer ? for none can be neerer then a wife , and none ought to be dearer . §. 9. Of husbands good esteeme of their * owne wiues . 2. For the person of a wife , An husband ought to esteeme that particular person to whom by Gods prouidence he is ioyned in mariage , to be the fittest , and best for him . This is implied vnder that particle of restraint ( OWNE ) noted by the Apostle where he saith a husbands loue your OWNE wiues , and againe presseth it vnder a comparison of the body ( as b your OWNE bodies ) Euery one thinketh his owne body best and fittest for him . A man might happily wish some defects or enormities in his owne body to be amended , and desire that his were like an others , more strait , strong , and comely then his owne , yet would he not haue his head to be vpon that other mans body : the same opinion ought a man ( that would loue his wife ) to haue of her . Good reason there is for him so to doe : for true is the prouerbe , if it be rightly taken , mariages are first made in heauen , that is , God hath an ouer-ruling hand in ordering them : which c Salomon implieth by that opposition which he maketh betwixt wealth and a wife : that is from our fathers , this from the Lord : in which respect he saith , d he which findeth a wife receiueth fauour of the Lord. If therefore thou art loued of God , and louest him , he will make thy wife proue a good thing to thee . Obiect . A wife may be a very lewd and wicked woman : how then can she be accounted the best wife ? Answ . 1. It may be she was good enough when first she was brought to thee , but thou by thine euill example , or negligent gouernment , or hard vsage , hast made her so bad as she is . Which if it be so , then is she to be considered not as thou hast marr'd her , but as thou diddest marie her . 2. Though she be not in relation to other wiues the best in condition , yet in relation to thee she may be the best in euent : if not for thine ease and quiet , yet for triall of thy wisdome and patience : and so as e a schoole of vertue she may be vnto thee . As f a skilfull pilots sufficiency is tried and knowne by tempestuous seas , so a mans wisdome by a troublesome wife . Yea she may be giuen thee as a punishment of some former sinnes , as seeking after a beautifull , honourable , rich , proper wife , rather then a religious and honest one : or seeking her without any direction or helpe first sought of God , or otherwise then thou hast warrant from God , as by stealth , and without parents consent ; or some other sinnes in another kinde , to bring thee to repentance : or as a meanes to restraine and weane thee from some future sinnes whereunto thou are subiect , and so proue a blessed crosse to keepe thee from a fearefull curse . §. 10. Of husbands preposterous opinion of their owne wiues . Contrary is a corrupt and peruerse opinion which many haue of their owne wiues , thinking them of all other the worst and vnfittest ; yea though they be such as euery way both in gifts and qualities of minde , and also in grace and comelinesse of body deserue all good respect and esteeme . Whereas others ( which looke with a single eye ) commend their good parts , they Misinterpret and misiudge all : if their wiues be religious , they thinke them hypocrites : if graue , sober and modest , melancholicke : if cheerefull , wanton : if they keepe at home , idle drones : if they take occasion ( though neuer so iust ) of going abroad , gadders , and lightfooted . This bad opinion of their wiues is a cause that their hearts are cleane remoued from their owne , and set vpon strange flesh : whereby the deuill gaineth what he desireth , that is , to put asunder such as God hath ioyned together , and to ioyne those whom God hath put asunder . §. 11. Of husbands * intire affection to their wiues . An husbands affection to his wife must be answerable to his opinion of her : he ought therefore to delight in his wife intirely , that is , so to delight in her as wholly and only delighting in her : In this respect the Prophets wife is called the a desire , or delight , or pleasure of his eyes : that wherein he most of all delighted , and therefore by a propriety so called . Such delight did Isaak take in his wife as it droue out a contrary strong passion , namely the griefe which he tooke for the departure of his mother : for it is noted that he b loued her , and was comforted after his mothers death . This kinde of affection the wise-man doth elegantly set forth in these words , Reioyce with the wife of thy youth : Let her be as the louing Hinde , and pleasant Roe , and be thou rauisht alwaies with her loue . Here note both the metaphors , and also the hyperbole which are vsed to set forth an husbands delight in his wife . In the metaphors againe note both the creatures whereunto a wife is resembled , and also the attributes giuen to them . The creatures are two , an Hind and a Roe , which are the females of an Hart and a Roe-Bucke : now it is noted of the Hart and Roe-Bucke , that of all other beasts they are most inamored ( as I may so speake ) with their mates , and euen mad againe in their heat and desire after them . These metaphors hath Salomon vsed to set forth that vnfained and earnest , intire and ardent affection which an husband ought to beare vnto his wife : which being taken in a good sense , and rightly applied , so as they exceed not the bonds of christian modesty and decency , are very fit , and pertinent to the purpose : if we stretch them beyond modesty , we wrong the pen-man of them , or rather the Holy Ghost that directed him , and propound a pernicious patterne vnto husbands . The attributes giuen to the forenamed creatures much amplifie the point : the former is termed a louing Hind , the latter a pleasant Roe , word for word an Hind of Loues , a Roe of fauour , that is , exceedingly loued and fauoured : ( for to set forth the extent of Gods loue vnto his Sonne , Christ is called the sonne of his loue : ) These comparisons applied to a wife , doe liuely set forth that delight which an husband ought to take in her , and yet is it much further amplified by the hyperbole vsed in this phrase , be thou rauisht with her loue , word for word erre thou in her loue , by which no sinfull error , or dotage is meant , but a lawfull earnest affection : implying two things especially : First so far to exceed , as to make a man ouersee some such blemishes in his wife , as others would soone espie and mislike : or else to count them no blemishes , delighting in her neuer a whit the lesse for them . For example , if a man haue a wife , not very beautifull , or proper , but hauing some deformity in her body , some imperfection in her speech , sight , gesture , or any part of her body , yet so to affect her , and delight in her , as if she were the fairest , and euery way most compleat woman in the world . Secondly , so highly to esteeme , so ardently to affect , so tenderly to respect her , as others may thinke him euen to doat on her . An husbands affection to his wife cannot be too great if it kept within the bonds of honesty , sobriety and comelinesse . The wiues affection ought to be as great to her husband , yet because of the husbands place of authority , he must especially take all occasions to manifest this his inward affection . Read the Song of Songs , and in it you shall obserue such affection manifested by Christ to his Spouse , as would make one thinke he did ( with reuerence in an holy manner to vse the phrase ) euen erre in his loue and doat on her . A good patterne and president for husbands . For nothing is more louely them a good wife . §. 12. Of the Stoicall disposition of husbands to their wiues . Contrary is the disposition of such husbands as haue no heat , or heart of affection in them : but Stoick-like delight no more in their owne wiues then in any other women , nor account them any dearer then others . A disposition no way warranted by the word . The faithfull Saints of God before mentioned , as also many other like to them , were no Stoicks , without all affection : nor did they thinke it a matter vnbeseeming them after a peculiar manner to delight in their wiues ( witnesse Isaacks sporting with his wife ) for this is a priuiledge which appertaineth to the estate of mariage . But that I be not mistaken herein , let it be noted that the affection whereof I speake is not a carnall , sensuall , beastly affection , but such an one as may stand with Christian grauitie and so briety : hauing relation to the soule of a mans wife as well as to her body , grounded both on the neere coniunction of mariage , and also on the inward qualities of his wife . Thus farre of an husbands inward respect of his wife . It followeth to speake of his outward cariage towards her . §. 13. Of an husbands * kinde acceptance of such things as his wife doth . S. Peter giueth a generall rule for an husbands outward cariage to his wife , which is , that he dwell with her according to knowledge , that is , as a man able to order his cariage wisely to his owne honour and his wiues good , that so she may haue iust cause to blesse God that euer she was ioyned to such an husband . Out of this generall these two branches sprout forth . 1. That an husband giue no iust offence to his wife . 2. That wisely he order that offence which is giuen by her . To auoid giuing of offence he must haue respect , 1. To that which she doth as duty to him . 2. To that which he doth as duty to her . In regard of the former two things are requisite : 1. That he kindly accept what she is willing and able to doe . 2. That he wisely commend and reward what she doth well . Thus hauing for orders sake laid downe these heads , I will distinctly handle the seuerall points . The first particular wherein an husband sheweth himselfe to be a man of knowledge in walking before his wife , is by a kinde and respectiue acceptation of euery good duty which his wife performeth . Abraham in testimony of his good acceptance of Sarahs pains in nursing her childe , made a great feast when the childe was weined : and Elkanah on a like respect gaue liberty to his wife to doe what seemed her best . A great incouragement must this needs be vnto wiues to be subiect vnto their husbands in all things , when they obserue no part of their subiection to be carelesly neglected , but rather graciously accepted : it quickens the spirit of a wife to thinke that her care and pains in pleasing her husband shall not be in vaine . §. 14. Of husbands sleighting and reiecting their wiues goodnesse . Contrary is their practise who thinking all which a wife doth to be but her duty , take little or no notice thereof ; or if they cannot but take notice of it , yet lightly regard it , and sleightly passe it ouer . This oftentimes maketh a wife euen repent the good she hath done , as Dauid repented the seruice which he had done for Nabal . The truth is that wiues ought rather to looke vnto God for his acceptation then vnto their husbands : and though their husbands will take no notice , or not regard what good thing they doe , yet for conscience sake , and for the Lords sake to doe their duty : But yet notwithstanding considering our weaknesse and backwardnesse vnto euery duty , it can not be denied but that an husbands sleight regarding of his wiues goodnesse is an occasion to make her weary thereof : and that he doth as much as in him lieth to make her repent thereof . But what may we say of such as scornfully reiect their wiues duty , yea like them the worse for making conscience thereof , and so ( cleane contrary to the rule of christianitie ) ouercome goodnesse with euill ? Surely they shew a very diabolicall spirit to be in them : and cannot but minister much griefe , and offence to their wiues , and make that which they doe to be very irksome and tedious . Fathers ought not to prouoke their children , much lesse husbands their wiues . §. 15. Of husbands * courteous accepting their wiues reuerend cariage . For the better conceiuing of this so needfull a point I will somewhat more particularly and distinctly applie the same to the seuerall duties of a wife : which were drawne to two heads Reuerence . Obedience . For the first , if a wife manifest her dutifull respect of her husband by any reuerend behauiour , gesture , or speech , he ought to meet her ( as we say ) in the middest of the way , and manifest his gratious acceptance thereof by some like courteous behauiour , gesture , and speech , being seemely , not foolish . Obiect . Thus shall an husband abase himselfe , and disgrace his place . Answ . The courtesie which I speake of as it commeth from a superiour , being a meere voluntary matter and a token of kindnesse and fauour , is no abasement of himselfe , but an aduancement of his inferiour : a great grace to her , no disgrace to him . Abram was counted of the Hittits a Prince of God , yet in communing with them he bowed vnto them . It is noted as a commendable thing in Esau , that though at that time he was his brothers superiour ( at least he tooke himselfe so to be ) yet obseruing how Iaakob reuerenced him , bowing seuen times to the ground , he ranne to meet him , and embraced him , and fell on his necke . Most pertinent to the point is the example of King Ahashverosh , who beholding Esthers reuerend standing before him , held out his Scepter vnto her , which in a King is great courtesie . But to put the matter out of all question , let the example of Christ noted in Salomons song be obserued , and we shall finde his courtesie euery way answering the reuerence of his Spouse . §. 15. Of husbands too great loftinesse . Contrary is a loftie carriage of husbands to their wiues , who ouerlooke all reuerence shewed by wiues , no more respecting their wiues in this case , then children or seruants : or then Kings doe respect the reuerence of their subiects . Oft haue I noted that there is a great difference betwixt a wife and all other inferiours , in which respect all euidences of reuerence should much better be respected ; yet we know that Kings and Queenes will put out their hands to be kissed by their subiects when they kneele before them , which is a token of courtesie : how much more ought husbands to shew courtesie ? Vnworthy they are to be reuerenced of their wiues , who too Lord-like ouerlooke them . §. 16. Of husbands * ready yeelding to their wiues humble suits . Againe , it being a token of reuerence in a wife humbly to make knowne her desire to her husband , he ought to shew so much courtesie as readily to grant her desire : this courtesie the forenamed a Ahashuerosh afforded to Esther : b Dauid to Bathsheba : c Isaak to Rebekah : d Abraham to Sarah , and many other husbands to their wiues . e Abraham shewed herein such respect to his wife , that though the thing which she desired were grieuous to him , yet he yeelded to his wife . Obiect . God first commanded him so to doe . Answ . This addeth the more force vnto the argument , shewing that it is Gods expresse will , that an husband should shew this kinde of courtesie to his wife . Much more ought a man to doe at his wiues request then at any others , whether friend , childe , or parent : yea much more free , forward and cheerefull ought he to shew himselfe in granting his wiues request then any others : prouided notwithstanding that her desire be of that which may lawfully be granted : to yeeld in things vnlawfull is to lose his authoritie , as was shewed * before . §. 17. Of husbands harshnesse to their wiues . Contrary is the harshnesse of their disposition who yeeld to their wiues request as an hard-milch-cow letteth downe her milke , not without much adoe : whereby the grace of all their yeelding is taken away . There can be no courtesie in yeelding , when it is against their minde and will forced from them : their wiues must aske , and intreat againe and againe , yea be forced to vse the mediation of others to perswade their husbands to yeeld to their request before they will yeeld , if at all they yeeld . What is this but to proclaime to all the world that there is no affection in them to their wiues ? If a wiues breath be strange to her husband , assuredly his heart is first strange to her : which is the readie way to make him set his heart on strange women . §. 18. Of husbands * forbearing to exact all that they may . As a wiues reuerence so also her obedience must be answered with her husbands courtesie . In testimony whereof , An husband must be ready to accept that wherein his wife sheweth her selfe willing to obey him . He ought to be sparing in exacting too much of her : in this case he ought so to frame his cariage towards her , as that obedience which she performeth , may rather come from her owne voluntary disposition , from a free conscience to God-wards , euen because God hath placed her in a place of subiection , and from a wiue-like loue , then from any exaction on her husbands part , and as it were by force . Husbands ought not to exact of their wiues , whatsoeuer wiues ought to yeeld vnto if it be exacted . They must obserue what is lawfull , needfull , conuenient , expedient , fit for their wiues to doe , yea and what they are most willing to doe before they be too peremptorie in exacting it . For example . 1. Though the wife ought to goe with her husband , and dwell where he thinkes meet , yet ought not he ( vnlesse by vertue of some vrgent calling he be forced thereto ) remoue her from place to place , and carrie her from that place where she is well setled without her good liking . a Iaakob consulted with his wiues , and made try all of their willingnesse , before he carried them from their fathers house . 2. Though she ought cheerefully to entertaine what guests he bringeth into the house , yet ought not he to be grieuous and burdensome therein vnto her : the greatest care and pains for entertaining guests lyeth on the wife : she ought therefore to be tendred therein . If he obserue her conscionable and wise , well able to manage and order matters about house , yet loth to doe any thing without his consent , he ought to be ready and free in yeelding his consent , and satisfying her desire , as b , Elkanah : and if she be bashfull and backward in asking consent , he ought voluntarily of himselfe to offer it : yea and to giue her a generall consent to order and dispose matters as in her wisdome she seeth meet , as the said Elkanah did : ( Doe ( saith he to his wife ) what seemeth thee good : ) and c the husband of that good housewife which Salomon describeth . A generall consent is especially requisite for ordering of houshold affaires : for it is a charge laid vpon wiues to d guide the house : whereby it appeareth that the businesses of the house appertaine , and are most proper to the wife : in which respect she is called the * hous-wife : so as therein husbands ought to referre matters to their ordering , and not restraine them in euery particular matter from doing any thing without a speciall licence and direction . To exemplifie this in some particulars , it appertaineth in peculiar to a wife , 1. To e order the decking and trimming of the house . 2. To f dispose the ordinary prouision for the family . 3. To g rule and gouerne maid seruants . 4. To h bring vp children while they are young , with the like . These therefore ought he with a generall consent to referre to her discretion : with limitation only of these two cautions . 1. That she haue in some measure sufficient discretion , wit , and wisdome , and be not too ignorant , foolish , simple , lauish , &c. 2. That he haue a generall ouersight in all , and so interpose his authority as he suffer nothing that is vnlawfull or vnseemly to be done by his wife about house , children , seruants , or other things : for 1. The generall charge of all lieth principally vpon him . 2. He shall giue an account vnto God for all things that are amisse in his house . 3. The blame of all will also before men lie vpon him . But those two cautions prouided , he ought together with his generall consent i put trust in his wife , ( as k Potiphar did in Ioseph ) making herein a difference betwixt a wife , and all others whether children of yeeres , friends , or seruants whom he imployeth in his affaires . Them in euery particular he may direct for matter and manner , and take a strait account of them for expences laid out , or other things done : because what they doe is wholly and only for another . To his wife ( who is a ioynt parent of his children , and gouernour of his house , to whose good the husbands wealth redoundeth , and in that respect doth for her selfe that which she doth for her husband ) greater liberty , and licence must be giuen . §. 19. Of husbands too much strictnesse towards their wiues . Contrary is the rigour and austeritie of many husbands , who stand vpon the vttermost step of their authoritie , and yeeld no more to a wife then to any other inferiour . Such are they 1. Who are neuer contented or satisfied with any dutie the wife performeth , but euer are exacting more and more . 2. Who care not how grieuous and burdensome they are to their wiues : grieuous by bringing such guests into the house as they know cannot be welcome to them : burdensome by tu frequent , and vnseasonable inuiting of guests , or imposing other like extraordinary businesses , ouer and aboue the ordinary affaires of the house . Too frequent imposing of such things , cannot but breed much wearisomnesse . Vnseasonable ( as when the wife is weake by sicknesse , childe-bearing , giuing sucke or other like meanes , and so not able to giue that contentment which otherwise she would ) cannot but much disquiet her , and giue her great offence . 3. Who hold their wiues vnder as if they were children or seruants , restraining them from doing any thing without their knowledge and particular expresse consent . 4. Who are ouer busie in prying into euery businesse of the house , and will haue their hand in all . Besides that such husbands afford no opportunity to their wiues of giuing proofe of that vnderstanding , wit , wisdome , care , and other gifts which God hath endowed them withall , they take away that maine end for which a wife was giuen a man , namely , to be a● helpe . Such husbands cannot but neglect other more weighty matters , which more properly belong vnto them . For obserue it and you shall finde , that such husbands as are most busie about the priuate affaires of the house appertaining to their wiues , are most negligent of such affaires as appertaine vnto themselues : they thinke they walke in integrity , but yet are they not iust nor wise therein : for the iust man walketh in HIS integrity , and the wisdome of the prudent is to vnderstand HIS way : ( i. ) that integrity which appertaineth to his owne peculiar place ; and his owne way : but euery foole will be medling , namely , with things not belonging to his place . 5. Who are ouer suspicious of their wiues , and thereupon ouer strickt in taking account of them . S. Paul calleth surmizes euill , and that not without iust cause : for euill they are in their nature , and euill in their effects , being occasions of many mischiefes : but in none so euill as in husbands ouer their wiues . If a wiues fidelity ( to whose good the welfare of the family , and increase of the stocke redoundeth as well as to the husbands ) be without iust cause suspected , who shall be trusted ? It is the ouerthrow of many families , that seruants are trusted , and not wiues . Thus farre of an husbands kinde acceptance of that which his wife is willing and able to doe . §. 20. Of Husbands encouraging their wiues in good things . The loue which an husband oweth to his wife , further re●uireth that he wisely commend and reward what she hath well ●one . That which the Apostle faith of the Magistrates authority , may fitly be applied to an husbands in relation to his wife , Doe that which is good , and thou shalt haue praise of the same . It is expresly noted in the description of a good husband , ●hat he praiseth his wife : and in that he saith , c Giue her of the ●uit of her hands , it is implied also that he rewardeth her . This is an vndoubted euidence of his good acceptance of ●er duty , and a further incouragement to stir her vp to goe on and continue in well doing . Yea this is also an euidence of his by and delight both in her person , and also in her well doing . 〈◊〉 there be no delight in ones person , well doing will rather stir vp enuy then ioy : and they that enuy a mans well doing , will neuer commend , or reward him for it . In an husbands commending of his wife this caueat must be put : that he so order his commendation as it sauour not of flattery , or dotage : nor yet * stir vp lust or enuy in others . §. 21. Of husbands vngratefull discouraging their wiues . Contrary is an vngratefull , if not enuious disposition of such husbands , as passing by many good things ordinarily and vsually euery day done by their wiues without any approbation , commendation or remuneration , are ready to dispraise the least slip , or neglect in them ; and that in such generall termes as if they neuer did any thing well , so as their wiues may well complaine and say as it is in the prouerbe , Oft did I well , and that heare I neuer : Once did I ill , and that heare I euer . Yet such will be ready to praise other mens wiues , and vp braid their owne wiues with the examples of those other , when their owne doe farre excell them in all kinde of goodnesse . What doth this shew but that either they take no notice of their own wiues goodnesse , or else by reason of the commonnesse thereof little regard it ? If their wiues haue not the more grace in them , this disposition is enough not only to discourage them from doing any good duty , but also to breed iealousie in them , and to alienate their hearts from them . §. 22. Of an husbands * mildnesse . Hitherto of that respect which an husband is to haue of that duty which his wife performeth to him . For auoiding iust offence , an husband must further haue good respect to that which as duty he doth to his wife . As kindly he must accept duty at his wiues hands , so mildly he must performe that duty which he oweth to her . This mildnesse is an especiall fruit , and euidence of loue , and a notable meanes to take away all offence that otherwise might be taken from many things which he doth . Sugar and Hony are not more pleasant to the tongue , then mildnesse to the heart ; it causeth such things as otherwise are irksome and grieuous to the soule , to be well taken and applied , euen as bitter pils dipt in sweet syrrop , or rolled vp in the soft pap of an apple , are soone swallowed downe and well digested . If an husband desire to be accounted a seruant of the Lord he must learne this lesson : For the seruant of the Lord must be gentle to all men . If any other seruant of the Lord , much more husbands : if to all men , most of all to their wiues : and that in many respects . 1. Because of the neere vnion betwixt man and wife . 2. Because of the ioynt authority she hath with him ouer others : that herein he may be a president and example to her . 3. Because of her weaknesse : glasses are tenderly handled : a small knocke soone breakes them . §. 23. Of husbands bitternesse . Contrary is bitternesse , a vice expresly forbidden , and that in particular to husbands . A vice that cannot stand with an husband-like loue : whereupon the Apostle commanding the one forbiddeth the other , Loue ( saith he ) and be not bitter . Nothing more turneth the edge of his authority , peruerteth the vse of his gouernment , prouoketh the stomacke of his wife , maketh his words and deeds lesse regarded , then bitternesse . It is as gall and wormwood mixed with sweet and wholesome meats , which causeth that they cannot be well digested , but with violence are spit out againe so soone as euer they be tasted . Men in authority are much prone hereunto : and therefore O husbands be so much the more watchfull against it , loue your wiues and be not bitter vnto them . §. 24. Of the * Titles which an husband giueth to his wife . The forenamed mildenesse of an husband must be manifested in his Speech , Cariage .   For so far as reuerence extends it selfe in the duties of wiues , must mildnesse be extended in the duties of husbands . Whether an husbands speech be to his wife before her face , or of her * behinde her backe , it must be sweetned with mildnesse . 1. For his speech to her , 1. The titles wherewith he calleth her . 2. The instructions which he giueth her . 3. The commandements which he layeth vpon her . 4. The reproofes wherewith he checketh her , must all be mixed with mildnesse . Among other titles , the most ordinary and vsuall title ( wife ) is a milde and kinde title , and least offensiue of all other : if an husband giue any other title to his wife , it must be such an one as manifesteth kindnesse , familiaritie , loue , and delight . Such are all the titles which Christ giueth to the Church , as Spouse , Loue , Doue , with the like . I doe not deny but that in the Song of Salomon , and in other places of Scripture many titles are giuen and speeches vsed by Christ to the Church which are not meet to be vsed by husbands to their wiues , because they are metaphoricall , and hyperbolicall : but yet in them all we may obserue tokens of amiablenesse , kindnesse , and mildnesse , which is the end for which I haue alledged his example . But contrary are such titles as on the one side set the wife in too high a place ouer her husband , as Lady , Mistresse , Dame , Mother , &c. And on the other side set her in too meane a rancke , as woman , wench , &c. And their Christian names contracted , as Sal , Mal , Besse , Nan. &c. and names of kindred , as Sister , and Cosen : and , opprobrious names , as stut , drab , queant ; and names more befitting beasts then wiues , as Cole , Browne , Muggle , &c. Obiect . These are titles of mildnesse , kindnesse , and much familiarity : for husbands call their wiues by these names , not when they are angry with them and displeased , but ordinarily , and vsually , euen when they are best pleased . Answ . The mildnesse and familiarity which is required of an husband must be such as may stand with his authority and place of eminency ( as some of those names doe not , ) and with that neere coniunction which is betwixt man and wife about all others ( as other doe not , ) and with Christian grauity and discretion ( as other doe not . ) Christians therefore must take heed that by their practise they iustifie not corrupt customes . §. 25. Of an husbands manner of instructing his wife . 2. To instruction the Apostle expresly annexeth meeknesse , Instruct ( saith he ) with meekenesse , those that oppose themselues . If ministers must vse meekenesse when they instruct their people , much more husbands when they instruct their wiues : if in case of opposition meekenesse must not be laid aside , then in no case , at no time . In this case to manifest meekenesse , let these rules be obserued . 1. Note the vnderstanding and capacity of thy wife , and accordingly fit thine instructions : if she be of meane capacity , giue precept vpon precept , line vpon line , here a little and there a little : a little at once oft giuen ( namely euery day something ) will arise in time to a great measure , and so arise , as , together with knowledge of the thing taught , loue of the person that teacheth will increase . 2. Instruct her in priuate betwixt thy selfe and her , that so her ignorance may not be blazed forth : priuate actions passing betwixt man and wife are tokens of much kindnesse and familiarity . 3. In the family so instruct children and seruants when she is present , as she may learne knowledge thereby : there can be no more meeke and gentle manner of instructing , then by one to instruct another . 4. Together with thy precepts mixe sweet and pithy perswasions , which are testimonies of great loue . Contrary is an harsh and rough manner of instructing , when husbands goe about to thrust into their wiues heads , as it were by violence , deepe mysteries which they are not able to conceiue , and yet if they conceiue not , they will be angry with them , and in anger giue them euill language , and proclaime their ignorance before children , seruants , and strangers . This harshnesse is ordinarily so fruitlesse , and withall so exasperateth a womans spirit , as I thinke he were better cleane omit the duty then doe it after such a manner . §. 26. Of an husbands manner of * commanding his wife any thing . 3. The commandements which an husband giueth to his wife , whether they be affirmatiue ( bidding her to doe something ) or negatiue ( forbidding her to doe this or that ) must all be seasoned with mildnesse . For which end respect must be had to the matter and manner of his commandements . In regard of the matter the things which he commandeth his wife to doe , must be 1. Such as are indeed lawfull and honest . 2. Such as she is perswaded to be so . 3. Such as beseeme her place . 4. Such as are of weight and moment . And on the contrary , the things which he forbiddeth must be 1. Such as are indeed vnlawfull to be done . 2. Such as he can euidently proue vnto her to be vnlawfull . 3. Such as are vnbeseeming her place . 4. Such as will haue some euill and mischieuous effect if they be done . 1. To command a thing vnlawfull , or forbid a thing which ought to be done , is to bring his owne authority into opposition with Gods : in which case he bringeth his wife into this strait , either to reiect Gods commandement or his . How then can she thinke that her husband loueth her , when he bringeth her into such snares and straits , that she must needs fall into the gulfe of Gods displeasure , or knocke against the rocke of her husbands offence ? Mildnesse is farre from such commandements . 2. The like may be said of such things as to a wiues conscience seeme to be sinnefull , if they be enioyned to her ; or her bounden duty , if they be forbidden : especially if she haue any ground for her conscience out of Gods word . The conscience is subiect to God alone : if it be forced it will be a fearefull horror , and a very hell in that party whose conscience is forced : She that doubteth is condemned if she doe that whereof she maketh doubt . 1. Obiect . In doubtfull matters the commanding power of a gouernour is sufficient warrant and ground to resolue the conscience of them that are vnder authority . Answ . 1. In things meerely doubtfull concerning which the partie in subiection hath not warrant out of Gods word one way or other , it may be so . But when the conscience doth not doubt and hang in suspence , but is out of some ground taken from Gods word perswaded that that which is commanded is vnlawfull , or that which is forbidden is a bounden dutie , then to doe this , or to leaue that vndone , is to the party so perswaded a sinne : and this is the doubting ( whereof the Apostle speaketh ) that condemneth a man. In this case to vrge a wife to doe this , or not to doe that , is to vrge her to sinne : which a milde spirit and louing heart will not doe . 2. Though the husbands command be sufficient warrant to the wife , and if he peremptorily presse her to this or that , she ought to yeeld , yet the loue and mildnesse required of an husband should make him so to tender her as to remit something of his power , and when he seeth her conscience troubled about his command , to releeue her conscience by for bearing to presse that which seemeth so burthensome to her . A husband may sinne in pressing that too much vpon his wife , which she vpon his pressing may without sinne yeeld vnto . §. 27. Of an husbands * wise carriage when his wife is erroneeusly scrupulous . 2. Obiect . What if an husband vpon his knowledge obserue his wife to be erroneously scrupulous , and to misinterpret and misapply the word of God which she maketh the ground of her scruple ? Answ . He must first labour to resolue her conscience by a plaine discouery of her error ; which is a true and a great token of loue : if notwithstanding all that he can doe in that kinde she cannot be brought to yeeld to that which he would haue , then he must carefully obserue these two things . 1. Whether her refusing to yeeld , be an obstinacy , or weakenesse . 2. Whether it be about a sleight or weighty matter . By the reasons which she rendreth , and her manner of pressing them , he may discerne whether weakenesse or obstinacy make her stand out against him : if the reason which she resteth on taken from Gods word be doubtfull , and to one that hath not a good sound iudgement , and a sharpe discerning wit , it may appeare to make something for her , it is to be presupposed that there is more weakenesse then stoutnesse in her . But if she can render no good reason , but only take euery shew that any way seemeth to incline to her words , and peremptorily holdeth the conclusion , and stifly standeth on her owne resolution , though the vanity of her pretences be euidently discouered to her , so as she hath not any thing further to obiect ; or if she render no reason at all but her owne thought , conceit and will , and yet refuseth to yeeld , surely obstinacy possesseth her heart . In case of obstinacy it is very expedient that an husband stand vpon his power to maintaine his authority , and by the best wisdome he can ( vsing only such meanes as are lawfull ) bring her to yeeld from her stoutnesse to that which he requireth : especially if the matter be weighty : as in case a religious man haue been maried to a Popish wife , and she by no reason will be moued to forbeare going to Masse , or yeeld to goe to the preaching of the Gospell . But if through weakenesse she cannot be perswaded of the lawfulnesse of that her husband requireth , and the matter required be of no great consequence , nor the weakenesse of her conscience cause any great error , an husband ought so farre to manifest his mildnesse as to forbeare to presse her conscience . §. 28. Of an husbands * forbearing to presse things vnbeseeming a wiues place . 3. Things vnbeseeming the place of a wife are dishonourable vnto her : for an husband to vrge his wife by strict charge to doe them , implieth more rigorousnesse then mildnesse . Had the spirit of that stout Monarch Ahashuerosh beene more milde towards his wife , he would not haue so farre pressed his wife vnto so vnseemly a thing as he did , namely , to come before all his Princes and people to make shew of her beautie . It is true indeed ( as we shewed * before ) that she offended in refusing to yeeld thereunto , he peremptorily requiring it ; but that offence on her part doth not justifie his fact , and free him from all blame : it is noted , that he was merry with wine , when he gaue that commandement , whereby is intimated , that his practise was more beseeming a drunken , then a sober man : such is their practise who exact of their wiues to doe such businesses as beseeme maid-seruants rather then wiues , or strumpets rather then honest women ; as to goe to tauernes , ale-houses , play-houses , and such places where light companions be . §. 29. Of an husbands pressing his authoritie in weighty matters . 4. To vse a mans authoritie about weightie matters , matters of moment , maketh it to haue such weight in it , as it will much better be regarded : for thus a wife will either be brought to yeeld vnto that which is commanded , or to condemne her selfe for not yeelding : yea thus a wife may see , that it is not his owne will so much which maketh him to vse his authoritie in commanding , as the necessitie of the thing it selfe , which redoundeth especially to her good that doth it : for the performance of a dutie is for the most part most aduantageable to the partie that performeth it , so as hereby an husband sheweth loue to his wife in pressing that which he presseth . This token of loue that it may the better appeare , it is behouefull that an husband adde to his commandement iust & weightie reasons , that thereby his wife may the better discerne the meetnesse , lawfulnesse , expediencie , and necessitie of the things commanded . We know that all the things which God commandeth are weightie and necessarie : yea his will ( being the very rule , and ground of all goodnesse ) maketh things absolutely necessarie , yet vnto his commandements he vseth to adde weightie reasons ; shewing on the one side the benefit and blessednesse that will come to such as obey his commandements ; and on the other side , the mischiefe and miserie that will fall on their pates who refuse to obey ; whereby he sheweth the great good respect which he beareth to vs , and the earnest desire he hath of our good . Thus may an husband euen in his commandements shew much loue and kindnesse . §. 30. Of husbands too great pride in commanding . Contrary is the peremptorie pride of husbands , when they will haue their owne will done : it booteth not whether the thing commanded be lawfull or vnlawfull , whether their wiues consciences can yeeld vnto it or no , whether it stand with the honour of their places or no , and whether it be weightie or light ; their will it is it should be done , and done it shall be , there is all the reason they will giue . Some thinke it a glory to command what they list ; and thinke that there is no proofe of their authoritie , and of their wiues subiection , but in such things as vpon their own will , without any further ground or reason , they command . If such husbands meet with confronts ; if though they command much , they finde not answerable performance ; they may thanke themselues , who runne the ready course to haue their authoritie contemned and euen troden vnder foot . §. 31. Of husbands rare and milde vsing their commanding power . Respect must be had by husbands to the manner of vsing their authoritie in commanding as well as to the matter . In regard of the manner his commandements must be 1. Rare , not too frequent . 2. By way of intreating , not too peremptorie . Authoritie is like a sword , which with ouer much vsing will be blunted , and so faile to doe that seruice which otherwise it might when there is most need . A wise , graue , peaceable man , may alwayes haue his sword in readinesse , and that also very bright , keene , and sharpe : but he will not be very ready to plucke it out of his scabberd ; he rather keepeth it for a time of need , when it should stand him in most steed . Such husbands therefore as are too frequent in their commands , shew themselues nor graue , nor wise , nor louers of peace . As the vse of an husbands authoritie in commanding must be rare , so when there is occasion to vse it , it must be with such mildnesse and moderation tempered , so as ( according to Saint Pauls example ) though he haue power to command that which is conuenient , yet for loues sake he rather intreat it . Note how mildly Abram frameth his speech to his wife , Say I pray thee ( saith he ) thou art my sister . Though the thing he required fauoured of too much weaknesse , yet his manner of requiring it was well beseeming a kinde husband . §. 32. Of husbands insolencie and peremptorinesse . Contrary is the insolencie of many , who cannot speake to their wiues , but in commanding-wise . Their authoritie is like a swaggerers sword , which cannot long rest in the sheath , but vpon euery small occasion is drawne forth . This frequent vse of commanding , maketh their commandements nought regarded . The like may be said of them who are too peremptorie in commanding : there must be no saying of nay , to that which they say : vpon command they will haue their minde done , and no other way : no perswasion , no intreatie shall be vsed : they will rather not at all haue their will done , then not vpon absolute command : nay they will not suffer others , in case of any refusall , to intreat , or perswade , but will try what absolutely they can doe by authoritie . Thus as by trying to bend steele how farre it will goe , it oft breaketh ; so by putting their authoritie to the vttermost triall , they oft lose all their authoritie : in which case the mends ( as we speake ) is in their owne hands . §. 33. Of an husbands * reprouing his wife . 4. The authoritie and charge which God hath giuen to an husband ouer his wife , doe require that as good and iust occasion is offered , he should reproue her : for this is an especiall meanes to draw her from those sinnes , wherein otherwise shee might liue and lie , yea and die also ; and so liue , lie , and die vnder Gods wrath : out of which miserie and wretchednesse to free a wife , is as great a token of loue , as to pull her out of the water when she is in danger of drowning , or out of the fire when she is in danger of burning . Solomon thus stileth reproofes , a reproofes of life , and expresly noteth b reproofes to be the way of life , a meanes to breed and preserue spirituall life , and to bring one vnto eternall life , and so to escape death and damnation . In these respects rebukes are called a pretious balme , or excellent oyle , which may heale a wound , but make none : it c breaketh not the head , as the Psalmist speaketh . Vpon this ground , no doubt , it is noted of many good husbands , who were without all question , louing , kinde , meeke , and milde husbands , that they reproued their wiues : as d Iaakob , e Iob , f Dauid , and others . §. 34. Of neglecting reproofe . Contrary is a seruile and timorous minde of many husbands , who are loth to offend , and ( as they thinke ) to prouoke their wiues ; and thereupon chuse rather to let them continue in sinne , then tell them of it . Wherein they both dishonour their place , and the image of God , which by vertue of their place they carry , and also in effect and in truth hate their wiues ; which the Law implieth , where it saith , Thou shalt not hate thy brother in thine heart , but shalt plainly rebuke thy neighbour , and not suffer sinne vpon him . §. 35. Of * well ordering reproofe in the matter thereof . That an husband may euidently demonstrate that his reprouing of his wife is indeed a fruit of his loue , he must haue an especiall care to sweeten it , especially with mildnesse : for it is the bitterest pill that by an husband can be giuen to a wife . It is a verball correction , & in that respect a middle meanes ( as I may so speake ) betwixt admonition and correction ; partaking somewhat of both : it goeth no further then words , and so is an admonition : the words of a reproofe are sharpe , and so it is a correction : though it be but a milde correction , yet it is a sharpe admonition ; and all the correction which by himselfe an husband can giue his wife : for we shall * after shew that he may not proceed to blowes , and strokes . To sweeten reproofe with mildnesse respect must be had ( as before was noted of commanding ) both to the matter , and also to the manner thereof . The matter of reproofe must be 1. Iust . 2. Weightie .   Iustice requireth that it be a truth , and a knowne truth , euen a thing whereof he is assured , for which he reproueth his wife . Christ in giuing direction for reprouing aright , layeth downe this as a ground , If thy brother shall trespasse , &c. a trespasse therefore must goe before reproofe : where no trespasse is , there reproofe is vniust . Againe , the Apostle aduiseth that an accusation should not be receiued but vnder two , or three witnesses ; whereby he implieth that a light report must not be receiued , but where blame is laid , there must be two or three witnesses to confirme it , so as he that censureth may haue good and sure ground for that which he doth : indeed that aduise was in particular giuen about an elder , but from the lesse to the greater it will follow to be a good aduise concerning wiues : for no kinde of person must be more warie in laying blame vpon another and reproouing for the same , then an husband on his wife . Equitie further requireth that the matter for which an husband reproueth his wife be weightie ; namely for some fault that is dangerous to her soule , hurtfull to their estate , contagious by reason of ill example to children , and others in the family , but most of all for sinne against God which prouoketh his wrath , and pulleth downe his heauie curse vpon him , her , and the whole family . When that for which a wife is reproued is a truth , a knowne truth , and a weightie truth , the husband in performing this dutie iustifieth his deed , sheweth that there was need thereof , and so giueth euidence of his loue , maketh his reproofe to pierce the more deeply , and so maketh her the more ashamed of her fault ; whence it will follow , that either she will amend her fault or at least will haue her mouth stopped , so as she shall haue nothing to except against it . The reproofe of the three Saints before mentioned , m Iaakob , n Iob , and o Dauid , were answerable to these points of Iustice and wisdome : and the effects thereof answerable to those which we haue noted in this reason , as the silence of the three wiues implieth : for none of them replied againe . §. 36. Of vndue reproofe . Contrary to the forenamed Iustice and equitie are ouer-light credulitie and vndue suspicion . Credulitie is when credence is giuen to euery light report , and thereupon blame laid vpon the wife before any iust proofe be made of that for which she is blamed : whereby it oft commeth to passe , that she is wrongfully and vniustly blamed : which if she be , what good fruit can proceed from such reproofes ? yea what euill fruits are not like to proceed from thence , as secret discontent ( if not malice and hatred ) and open contentions and brawlings ? The like may be said of light and causelesse suspicion , which is the mother of iealousie , and the very bane of mariage , from whence the deuill taketh great aduantage against them both , seeking thereby to vnloose that knot which God hath so firmly knit betwixt them . Suspicion to the minde is as a coloured glasse to the eie , which representeth things to the sight not as indeed they are in their owne true colour , but as the colour of the glasse is . Suspicion will make a man peruert euery thing that his wife doth , and blame her many times for such things as are praise-worthy : in which case what can be thought , but that an husband seeketh aduantage against his wife , rather then any good vnto her ? If to those two forenamed vices ( credulity and suspicion ) he ●dde rashnesse and hastinesse in reprouing , and make euery ●mall and light matter which any way he disliketh , matter of reproofe , doth he not proclaime to all that shall know it , that he loues chiding more then he loues his wife ? Yea is not this the ready way to make all his reproofe ( if not scorned ) lightly regarded ? What then will be the profit of them ? §. 37. Whether an husband may reprooue his wife for such things as he is guilty of . To the matter of reproofe some adde , that an husband ought not to reproue his wife for that fault whereof he himselfe is guiltie : but I make doubt of this direction . I denie not but that he ought to haue an especiall care that he be not guiltie of that crime for which he blameth his wife ; otherwise , 1. he blunteth the edge of his reproofe , so as readily it cannot peirce into her heart . 2. He causeth it to rebound backe againe vpon himselfe with these reproches , Physitian healethy selfe : Hypocrite first cast the beame out of thine owne eye . Thou that teachest another teachest thou not thy selfe ? 3. He is an heauy witnesse against himselfe ; for in that he iudgeth another he condemneth himselfe . But thereupon to infer , that because he is guiltie of such vices as are in his wife , he ought not to reproue her though she be worthy to be reproued , is scarse sound and good diuinitie : for thus he maketh himselfe guilty of a double fault , one of committing the sinne himselfe , the other of suffering his wife to lie therein : whereas if he reproued his wife , he might thereby reclaime both her and himselfe : for I doubt not but his reprouing of his wife would strike deeper into his owne conscience then if a third should reproue them both . How were Iudah and Dauid stroken to the heart after they had giuen sentence against such crimes as they themselues were guiltie of ? It is a good aduice that no man be guiltie of that which he reproueth in his wife , but it is no good rule to say , no man ought to reproue his wife of that whereof he is guiltie . §. 38. Of well ordering reproofe in the manner thereof , Like directions to those which were giuen for the manner of commanding must be obserued in the manner of reprouing . Reproofes therefore must be Rare . Meeke .   When reproofes are seldome vsed , not but vpon vrgent and necessary occasion , 1. It sheweth that an husband taketh no delight in rebuking his wife , but is euen forced thereto . 2. It maketh his wife much more regard it . 3. It is like to worke a more perfect cure , for seldome and rare reproofes doe commonly peirce most deeply . Contrary is continuall chiding , and finding fault with a wife for euery thing amisse : if not only the wife her selfe , but a childe , or seruant , or any else in the house doe amisse , the wife shall be blamed for it . This is too common a fault in husbands : whereby they much prouoke their wiues ; yea and many times make them no more regard a reproofe then any other word . For as birds which alwaies abide in Belfries where much ringing is , are not a whit afrighted with their lowd sound ; so wiues who haue their eares from time to time filled with their husbands rebuke , by vse are brought , nothing at all to be moued therewith . 2. That a reproofe must be giuen in meeknesse is cleere by the Apostles generall precept of restoring one in the spirit of meeknesse : for a right manner of reprouing is thereby particularly intended . Now of all with whom we haue to doe , no fitter obiect for meeknesse then a wife , who in a more peculiar manner then any other is thine owne flesh . Meeknesse hath respect both to secrecie of place , and to softnesse of words . When an husband is alone with his wife , then is the fittest season for reproofe : thus will reproofe be answerable to Christs direction : tell him his fault betweene thee and him alone ( saith Christ of a brother : ) but no brother must be tendred more then a wife . Thus will it also soake better into her soule , when no conceit of dishonour and discredit shall arise vp to hinder the worke of it : which conceits will be ready to arise when a reproofe is giuen in publike before others . Thus likewise will occasion be taken away from children and seruants of despising her : which otherwise they would quickly take , ●f before them she should be rebuked ; gathering from thence , ●hat she is kept vnder as much as they : now because she is with him a ioynt gouernour of them , he ought by all meanes to maintaine her reputation before them . 1. Quest . What if she regard not a rebuke in secret ? Answ . He may follow Christs direction , Take one or two more , namely wise , graue , faithfull friends , if it may be , of her kindred , as her parents ( if she haue any liuing ) or such as are in course of nature next to parents ( if they be not partiall on her side ) and before them rebuke her : but by no meanes before any of the house vnder her gouernment . 2. Quest . What if her fault be publicke , such an one as may be an ill example to them of the house , it being committed in their sight , or brought some other way to their knowledge ? Answ . Wisely he must so manifest his dislike of her fault , as he no way impaire her honour : he may therefore declare that such a thing was not well done , and fore-warne his houshold of committing the like ; yea roundly threaten them that if any of them doe the like they shall dearely repent it ; and if such as are vnder correction offend therein , the more surely and seuerely correct them , euen because they haue taken example . Thus shall he testifie a great good respect of his wife , and also a thorow dislike and hatred of her sinne . 2. A soft tongue ( as Salomon noteth ) breaketh the bones , that is , softneth an hard heart , and beateth downe a stout stomacke . How will it then worke vpon a soft heart , and gentle disposition ? If therefore an husband looke to doe good by reprouing his wife , his reproofe must be so ordered , as it may seeme to be rather a gentle admonition , then a sharpe rebuke . He may and ought plainly to declare her fault vnto her , but in milde and meeke tearmes , without reuiling , opprobrious and ignominious words . Quest . What if her fault be an heinous notorious sinne ? Answ . In an extraordinary case some sharpnesse may be vsed : as the reproofes of Iaakob , Iob , and Dauid doe shew , for they were euery one of them sharpe : but yet this sharpnesse must not be made bitter by any euill language . A womans wickednesse may not moue an husband to be froward , and outragious ; but rather to be the more watchfull ouer himselfe , that he containe himselfe within the bounds of discretion and moderation . For which end it is meete that husbands lay it downe for a rule , neuer to rebuke their wiues when they are in passion . Passion raiseth a darke mist before the eies of reason ; which , while it remaineth , keepeth reason from giuing any good direction . Yea passion is as a fire , and it so incenseth a man , and distempereth him , that in his disorder he can keepe no meane or measure . Howsoeuer a man be not able to rule himselfe when passion is stirred vp , yet , if before hand while his eie is single , and his whole body light , while he is in tune ( as we speake ) and well tempered , he resoluedly determine with himselfe not to doe such or such a thing in his passion ; that fore-going resolution will be an especiall means to make him forbeare doing that in passion , which if he should doe , he could not in passion well order and moderate . For if once he begin to doe a thing in passion , the least prouocation that can be , will be as bellowes to blow vp that fire into a flame . In regard of the violence of passion ( wherein women by reason of the weaknesse of their iudgement are for the most part most violent ) it is also the part of a wise man to forbeare this duty of reprouing his wife euen when she is in passion . For as it is needfull that he should be in case well to giue a reproofe , so as needfull it is that she should be in case well to take a rebuke . Passion both filleth and festereth ones heart . The heart then being full of passion , what roome is left for good aduice ? will a man powre wine into a vessell full of water , or stay , till all the water be dreaned out ? The heart also being so festered as it sauoureth of nothing but passion , what good can then good aduice doe ? It is therefore an especiall point of wisdome , and sheweth a good respect that a man beareth to his wife , yea it sauoureth of much meeknesse and moderation for an husband , well to weigh both his owne and his wiues temper when he reproueth her , and to forbeare doing it while either he or she be in passion . §. 39. Of vndiscreet reproouing a wife . Contrary is the indiscretion of husbands who regard nor place , nor persons , nor time , nor temper of themselues or their wiues , nor any other circumstance in reprouing , but like Saul ( who at a table where a great feast was , in presence of his Nobles and Captaines , when he was inraged with anger , with most virulent and bitter speeches not rebuked onely but reproached also his sonne , and that with such words as he spared not his owne wife ; for in his passion he called his sonne , sonne of the peruerse rebellious woman : ) like this foolish and furious Saul , I say , they take the most open place of the family before children , seruants , and whole house , to reproue their wiues ; and that with such bitter and disgracefull termes , as either they prouoke their wiues to answer againe for maintaining ( as they thinke ) their owne credit and reputation , ( thus Ionathan was prouoked to answer his father againe : ) or else giue them of the house that behold her thus trampled vnder foot , occasion to set their feet also vpon her . Most husbands are forward enough to reproue , but few doe it in meeknesse , and moderation . They cannot doe it but in company , nor without bitter words . Many in rebuking their wiues , sticke not to vse all the euill termes that they can thinke of , euen such as tend not only to their wiues dishonour , but also to their owne and their childrens infamy . The reason whereof is , because they neuer rebuke but when they are in passion , and so scarse know what they doe : whereby also they stirre vp passion in their wiues , and yet for all that refraine not any whit the more , but rather grow more violent : as when the heat of two fires meet together , the flame must needs be the greater . This being the preposterous practise of many husbands , is it any maruell that ordinarily so little good , and so much hurt is done by reprouing ? Nay , would it not be a wonder , if any good , and no hurt should be done thereby ? This therefore though it be a duty , yet a dutie rarely and with great moderation to be vsed . Thus farre of an husbands mildnesse in his speeches to his wife . §. 40. Of an husbands * amiable countenance towards his wife . An husbands cariage towards his wife must be answerable to his speech , or else all the mildnesse thereof will seeme but complementall . A mans cariage compriseth vnder it , his Countenance , Gesture , Actions : in all which must mildnesse be seated . 1. His countenance in his wiues presence , and towards his wife , must be composed to an amiable pleasantnesse . His authority ouer her , and eminencie aboue her , may not make him forget the neere coniunction and vnion betwixt them . Vnder the face and countenance I comprise head , brow , eies , lips and such other parts which are , according as they are framed , signes of amiablenesse , or discontentednesse . Now among , and aboue other parts of the body , the outward composition of the countenance doth soonest and best declare the inward disposition of the heart . By Esaus pleasant countenance Iaakob perceiued that he was pacified in his heart towards him , and thereupon said , I haue seene thy face as though I had seene the face of God , that is , an amiable , gracious countenance . On this ground Dauid desired God , to lift vp the light of his countenance vpon him , that thereby he might know the fauour and loue of God towards him . On the other side by a frowning and lowring face , by hanging downe the head , putting out the lips , with the like , anger , malice , griefe , with other like affections of heart , are manifested : by Caines casting downe of his countenance God discerned anger and enuy to be in his heart : by Labans countenance Iaakob obserued that his affection was turned from him . A wife then beholding mildnesse and amiablenesse in her husbands face , beholds it as the face of God , and therein as in a looking glasse beholds the kindnesse and loue of his heart , and so hath her heart thereby the more firmely knit vnto him , and is moued the more to respect him . §. 41. Of husbands too great austeritie . Contrary is 1. A loftie proud countenance , as of an imperious Lord ouer his vassals . 2. A grim sterne countenance , as of a iudge ouer poore prisoners . 3. A lowring frowning countenance , as of a discontented ●reditor ouer a desperate debtor . 4. A fierce fiery countenance , as of an angry King ouer a ●biect that hath displeased him . These and such like countenances as they manifest a proud , stout , furious discontented disposition of heart , so they cannot but giue great discontent to a wife , yea and much affright her being but a weake vessell , and alienate her heart and affection from him . §. 42. Of an husbands familiar gesture with his wife . II. An husbands gesture ought to be so familiar , and amiable towards his wife , as others may discerne him to be her husband , and his wife may be prouoked to be familiar with him . They which this way are ready to shew themselues kind and milde husbands , are prone to exceed and so to fall into an extreame on the right hand : for some are neuer well but when they haue their wiues in their laps , euer colling , kissing , and dallying with them , they care not in what company ; thus they shew more lightnesse , fondnesse , and dotage , then true kindnesse and loue , which forgetteth not an husband-like grauity , sobriety , modesty and decency . Some sticke not to alledge Isaacks sporting with Rebeckah , to countenance their lasciuiousnesse . But they forget that what Isaak did , was when he and his wife were alone : he was seene through a window . Much greater liberty is granted to man and wife when they are alone , then in company . Besides there are many other waies to shew kindnesse and familiarity , then by lightnesse and wantonnesse . §. 43. Of an husbands strangenesse to his wife . Contrary to the familiaritie I speake of , is ( as we speake ) strangenesse , when an husband so carrieth himselfe towards his wife as if she were a stranger to him : if he come in cōpany where his wife is , of all other women he will not turne to her , nor take notice of her . This fault is so much the greater if such a man be of a free pleasant cariage , and vse to be merry and familiar with other women . Though his mirth and familiarity be such as is not vnbeseeming a Christian , yet his cariage being of another temper towards his wife , it may be a meanes to breed iealousie in her . Many thinke outward kinde gesture towards wife to be fondnesse , but if they knew what a meanes it is to stirre vp , increase , and preserue loue in a wiues heart to her husband , they would be otherwise minded . §. 43. Of an husbands giuing fauours to his wife . III. Actions are of all other the most reall demonstrations of true kindnesse , wherein an husband must not faile , as he would haue his kinde speech , countenance , and gesture to be taken in the better part . Kindnesse and mildnesse in action consisteth in giuing fauours ( as we speake ) vnto his wife . This is expresly noted in Elkanah , who euery yeere gaue fauours to his wiues . Thus an husband as he testifieth his loue to his wife , so he will much prouoke her to doe all duty to him . A small gift , as an action of kindnesse freely giuen , not vpon any debt , but in testimony of loue , doth more worke on the heart of her to whom it is giuen , then much more giuen vpon contract , or for a worke done , whereby it may seeme to be deserued . In giuing fauours to a wife , an husband ought to be more bountifull and liberall , then to others , that so she may see thereby he loues her aboue all ; as it is noted that Elkanah gaue Annah a worthy portion , because he loued her . And in giuing fauours it is best to bestow them with his owne hands , vnlesse he be absent from her . §. 44. Of husbands beating their wiues . Contrary are the furious , and spightfull actions of many vnkinde husbands ( heads too heady ) whose fauours are buffets , blowes , strokes , & stripes : wherein they are worse then the venemous viper . For the viper for his mates sake casteth out his poison : and wilt not thou , ô husband , in respect of that neere vnion which is betwixt thee and thy wife , lay aside thy fiercenesse and cruelty ? Many wiues by reason of their husbands furie , are in worse case then seruants : for 1. Such as will not giue a blow to a seruant , care not what load they lay vpon their wiues . 2. Where seruants haue but a time and terme to be vnder the tyranny of such furious men , poore wiues are tied to them all their life long . 3. Wiues can not haue so good remedy by the helpe of law against cruell husbands , as seruants may haue against cruell masters . 4. Masters haue not such opportunity to exercise their cruelty ouer seruants as husbands ouer wiues , who are to be continually at boord and bed with their husbands . 5. The neerer wiues are , and the dearer they ought to be to their husbands , the more grieuous must stroakes needs be when they are giuen by an husbands hand , then by a masters . 6. The lesse power and authority that an husband hath to strike his wife , then a master to strike a seruant , the more heauie doe his stroakes seeme to be , and the worse doth the case of a wife seeme to be in that respect , then of a seruant . Not vnfitly therefore is such a man ( if he may be thought a man rather then a beast ) said to be like a father-queller and mother-queller . Quest . May not then an husband beat his wife ? Answ . With submission to better iudgements , I thinke he may not : my reasons are these . 1. There is no warrant thorowout the whole Scripture by precept , or example for it : which argument though it be negatiue , yet for the point in hand is a forceable argument in two respects . 1. Because the Scripture hath so plentifully and particularly declared the seuerall duties of husbands and wiues : and yet hath deliuered nothing concerning an husbands striking and beating his wife . 2. Because it hath also plentifully and particularly spoaken of all such as are to correct , and of their manner of correcting , and of their bearing correction who are to be corrected , and of the vse they are to make thereof ; and yet not any thing at all concerning an husbands punishing , or a wiues bearing in this kinde . The Scripture being so silent in this point , we may well inferre that God hath not ranked wiues among those in the family who are to be corrected . 2. That small disparity which ( as I haue * before shewed ) is betwixt man and wife , permitteth not so high a power in an husband , and so low a seruitude in a wife , as for him to beat her . Can it be thought reasonable that she who is the mans perpetuall bed-fellow , who hath power ouer his body , who is a ioynt parent of the children , a ioynt gouernour of the family , should be beaten by his hands ? What if children or seruants should know of it ? ( as they must needs : for how can such a thing be done in the house and they of the house know it not ? ) can they respect her as a mother , or a mistresse who is vnder correction as well as they ? 3. The neere coniunction , and very vnion that is betwixt man and wife suffereth not such dealing to passe betwixt them . The wife is as a mans selfe , a They two are one flesh . No man but a frantike , furious , desperat wretch will beat himselfe . Two sorts of men are in Scripture noted to cut and lanch their owne flesh , idolaters , as the b Baalites , and Daemoniacks , as c he that was possessed with a legion of deuils . Such are they who beat their wiues , either blinded in their vnderstanding , or possessed with a deuill . Obiect . He that is best in his wits will suffer his body to be pinched , pricked , lanched , and otherwise pained , if it be needfull and behoofull . Answ . 1. A mans heart will not suffer him to doe any of these himselfe : their are Chirurgions whose office it is to doe such things : if the Chirurgion himselfe haue need of any such remedy for his owne body , he will vse the helpe of another Chirurgion . If the case so stand as a wife must needs be beaten , it is fitter for an husband to referre the matter to a publike Magistrate ( who is as an approued and licensed Chirurgion ) and not to doe it with his owne hands . 2. Though some parts of the body may be so dealt withall , yet euery part may not , as the heart , which the wife is to the man. 3. The comparison holdeth not . For the fore-named pinching , lanching , &c. is no punishment for any fault , as the beating of a wife in question is , there is no question but a man that hath skill may if need be open a veine , lanch a boile , splinter a broken bone , or disioynted ioynt in his wiues body , which may be more painfull then correction : and herein the comparison holdeth , but not in the other . 2. Obiect . There is as neere a coniunction betwixt Christ and his Church , as betwixt man and wife : yet Christ for beareth not to correct and punish his Church . Answ . There is a double relation betwixt Christ and the Church : he is an husband vnto it , hauing made it of his flesh , and of his bones : and a supreme Lord ouer it , hauing all power in heauen and earth committed vnto him . In this latter respect he punisheth , not in the former . An husband is not such a supreme Lord ouer his wife : therefore Christs example , is no warrant to him . 4. There is no hope of any good to proceed from an husbands beating of his wife : for where the party corrected is perswaded that the party which correcteth hath no authority or right so to doe , it will not be brought patiently to take it : but will resist , and striue if it be possible to get the mastery . Let a stranger strike such a childe of yeeres or a seruant as will patiently beare many stroakes at a parents or masters hand , they will turne againe at that stranger , and indeauour to giue him as good as he brings : now a wife hauing no ground to be perswaded that her husband hath authority to beat her , what hope is there that she will patiently beare it , and be bettered by it ? Or rather is it not likely that she will , if she can , rise against him , ouer-master him ( as many doe ) and neuer doe any duty aright ? A fault in a wife is not taken away but increased by blowes . Obiect . Smart and paine may make her dread her husband , stand in awe of him , and doe her duty the better . Answ . Such dread and awe beseemes neither the place of an husband to exact it , nor the place of a wife to yeeld it . Though perforce she may be brought to yeeld some outward subiection , yet inward hatred of her husbands person may be ioyned therewith , which is as bad , if not worse then outward disobedience . Obiect . She may be of so outragious a disposition , as , but by force , she will not be kept in any compasse . 1. Answ . It hath beene of old time answered , that no fault should be so great , as to compell an husband to beat his wife . 2. Answ . Other forceable meanes may be vsed besides beating by her husbands hands : she may be restrained of libertie , denied such things as she most affecteth , be kept vp , as it were , in hold ; and , if no other meanes will serue the turne , be put ouer to the Magistrates hands , that if she be of so seruile a disposition , as by no other meanes she will be kept vnder then by feare and force , by smart and paine , she may feare the Magistrate , and feele his hand , rather then her husbands . Obiect . If a wife waxe so mannish , or rather mad , as to offer to strike and beat her husband , may he not in that case beat her to make her cease her outrage ? Answ . I doubt not but that that good prouision which is made in law to preserue a mans life , may be applied to this purpose . The law simply condemnes all murther ; yet if a man be so assaulted , as there is no way to preserue his owne life , but by taking away his life that assaults him , it condemneth not him as a murtherer , because he did it in defence of himselfe . So if an husband be set vpon by his wife , it is lawfull and expedient that he defend himselfe , and if he can doe it no other wayes but by striking her , that is not to be reckoned an vnlawfull beating her . §. 45. Of an husbands bearing with his wines infirmities . Hither to of the husbands auoiding of offence , a word concerning his bearing with offence . A generall dutie it is , common to all of all sorts , to beare one anothers burden : in which extent euen a wife is to beare her husbands burden , because he , as euery one else , is subiect to slip and fall , and so hath need to be supported . Yet after a more speciall and peculiar manner doth this dutie belong to an husband , and that in two respects . 1. Of the two , he is more bound then his wife , because in relation to his wife he is the stronger : for she is the weaker vessell , 1. Pet. 3. 7. But the strong are most bound to beare with the infirmities of the weake , Rom. 15. 1. 2. He is bound to beare with his wife more then with any other , because of that neere coniunction which is betwixt them : he that cannot beare with his wife , his flesh , can beare with no bodie . The reason alleaged by the Apostle to moue a man to dwell with his wife according to knowledge , and to giue honour to her , intimated in this phrase , as to the weaker vessell , sheweth that this is a peculiar dutie belonging to an husband , wherein , and whereby he may both manifest his knowledge and wisdome , and also doe honour to his wife . For why is he put in minde of her weaknesse , but to shew he should beare with her ? As that phrase intimateth the dutie , so also it intimateth a good reason to inforce it . For pretious things , whereof we make high account , the weaker they be , the more tenderly , and charily are they handled , as Cheney dishes , and christall glasses : and of all parts of the bodie , the eye is most tenderly handled . Now what things , what persons are more deare and pretious then a wife ? yet withall she is a weake vessell : therefore she is much to be borne withall . For an husbands better direction herein , difference must be made betwixt infirmities : for some are naturall imperfections , other are actuall transgressions . Naturall imperfections are inward , ( as slownesse in conceit , dulnesse in apprehension , shortnesse of memorie , hastinesse in passion , &c. ) or outward , ( as lamenesse , blindnesse , deafnesse , or any other defect , and deformitie of bodie . ) These infirmities should breed pitie , compassion , commiseration , yea and greater tendernesse and respect , but no offence . Note Abrahams example in this case : his wife was barren , yet he despised her not for it , nor vpbraided her with any such thing . Actuall transgressions are breaches of Gods law : whereof such are here ment , as are most directly tending to his owne disquiet , and disaduantage , as shrewishnesse , waiwardnesse , nicenesse , stubbornnesse , &c. In the bearing of these must an husband especially shew his wisdome , and that sundry wayes . 1. By vsing the best and mildest meanes he can to redresse them , as meeke admonition , seasonable aduice , gentle intreatie , and compassionate affection . Elkanah supposing that his wife offended in her passion , thus dealt with her and supported her . 2. By remouing the stone whereat she stumbleth , by taking away the occasion ( so far as conueniently he can ) which maketh her offend . Thus Abram , and that by Gods aduice , put Hagar and her sonne out of the house , because they were an offence to Sarah . 3. By turning his eyes away ( if the matter be not great , but such as may be tolerated ) and taking no notice of the offence , but rather passing by it , as if he perceiued it not . Solomon saith , that it is a mans glory to passe ouer a transgression : and he exhorteth a man not to giue his heart to all the words that men speake . 4. By forgiuing and forgetting it ( if notice be taken thereof . ) Iaakob tooke notice of Rachels rash , and froward demand , for he rebuked her for it : yet in that he readily yeelded to that which afterwards she moued him vnto , it appeareth that he forgaue the offence , if not forgat it . The best triall of a mans affection to his wife , and of his wisdome in ordering the same , is in this point of bearing with offences . Not to be offended with a wife that giueth no offence is not praise-worthy : heathen men may goe so farre . Note what Christ saith of this case , If yee loue them which loue you , and doe good to them that doe good to you , what thanks and reward haue ye ? for publicans , and sinners doe the same : but gently to forbeare , and wisely to passe ouer offences when they are giuen , not to be prouoked when there is cause of prouocation ministred , is a true Christian vertue , a vertue beseeming husbands better then any other kinde of men . §. 46. Of husbands testinesse . Contrary is testinesse , and peeuishnesse , when husbands are moued with the least prouocation , like tinder catching fire at the least sparke that falleth vpon it : yea many are like gunpowder , which not only taketh fire , but also breaketh out into a violent flame , vpon the least touch of fire : as gunpowder is dangerous to be kept in an house , so such husbands to be ioyned so neerely to wiues as mariage ioyneth them . If it be said , that as gunpowder doth no hurt , if fire come not at it ; so they are good and kinde , if they be not prouoked and displeased . I answer , that we haue a prouerbe that saith , The deuill is good while he is pleased , yet it is not safe to haue the deuill too neere . It is as impossible ( considering mans weaknesse ) that he should liue and conuerse with any , and not giue offence , as for flint stones long to beat and dash against one another , & no sparke of fire to come from them . How then may it be thought possible for a wife , who is so continually conuersant with her husband , and the weaker vessell , to liue without giuing him offence ? It is no very kinde speech , which husbands vse , especially if they be told of their vnkindnesse , Let my wife deserue fauour , and she shall haue it . How little fauour would such husbands haue of Christ their husband , if he should be of that minde towards them ? Thus farre hath beene handled the first part of an husbands well managing his authoritie , by a tender respect of his wife . The second is a prouident care for her . §. 46. Of an husbands prouident care for his wife . An husband that tenderly respecteth his wife , but prouidently careth not for her , sheweth more affection then discretion : he may haue a kinde heart , but he wants a wise head . How then can he be a good head vnto his wife ? Some present contentment she may haue by him : but small profit and benefit can she reape from him . Those duties therefore which haue beene deliuered must be done , but these that follow must by no meanes be left vndone . An husbands prouident care is noted in that office of Christ , wherein an husband resembleth him , namely , to be a Sauiour of the bodie , as hath beene * before declared . It consisteth 1. In prouiding things needfull for his wife . 2. In protecting her from things hurtfull . 1. A carefull prouiding of things needfull , is a principall part of that honour , which husbands are to giue vnto their wiues . For where the Apostle saith , that Elders are worthy of double honour , he meaneth maintenance as well as reuerence . The Apostle counteth him worse then an Infidell , that prouideth not for his owne , and specially for those of his owne house . Who are of an husbands house , if not his wife ? in his house , who more properly his owne , then his wife ? If then an husband prouide not for his wife , what is he to be accounted ? Great reason he should prouide for her , because he hath taken her from her parents and friends , and hath receiued that portion which they allotted her , and hath authoritie committed vnto him ouer her , and she is put in subiection vnder him : her friends hauing giuen away her portion , and their power ouer her , and committed all to him , will take no further care for her : she being in subiection vnder him cannot without him prouide for her selfe . Who then shall prouide for her if he doe not , whose wholy and only she is ? Contrary is their minde , who take a wife only for their owne content , or delight , or gaine , and neuer thinke of that charge which together with a wife they take vpon them . According to their minde is their practise : for when they haue a wife they neglect her in euery thing but what may stand with their owne ends . Much haue they to answer for : and so much the more , because a wife is an especiall pledge of Gods fauour . §. 47. Of an husbands prouiding meanes of spirituall edisication for his wife . In this prouident care which an husband ought to haue of     his wife , we will consider the Extent thereof . Continuance     It ought to extend both to her selfe , and to others . In regard of her selfe , to her Soule . Body .   For her Soule , meanes of spirituall edification must be provided , and those both priuate and publike . Priuate meanes , are holy and religious exercises in the house , as reading the word , praier , catechising , and such like ; which being the spirituall food of the soule are to be euery day , as our bodily food , prouided and vsed . An husband as a master of a family must provide these for the good of his whole house ; but as an husband , in speciall for the good of his wife : for to his wife , as well as to the whole house he is a King , a Priest , and a Prophet . By himselfe therefore , for his wiues good , ought he to performe these things , or to prouide that they may be done by some other . C●raelius himselfe performed those exercises . Micah hired a Leuite ( though his Idolatry were euill , yet his care to haue a Leuite in his house was commendable . ) The Shunemites husband prouided a chamber for the Prophet , and that especially for his wiues sake , for it was at her request . Publike meanes are the holy ordinances of God publikly performed by Gods Minister . The care of an husband for his wife in this respect is , so to order his habitation , and prouide other needfull things , as his wife may be made partaker thereof . It is expresly noted of Elkanah that he so prouided for his wiues , that they went with him euery yeere to the house of God : the like is intimated of Ioseph the husband of the virgin Mary . In those daies there was a publike place and house of God , whither all Gods people ( how farre soeuer they dwelt from it ) were to resort euery yeere : the places where Elkanah and Ioseph dwelt , were farre remote from the house of God , yet they so prouided , as not only themselues , but their wiues also went to the publike worship of God. Now there are many houses of God , places for the publike worship of God , but yet through the corruption of our times , the ministery of the word ( the most principall meanes of spirituall edification ) is not euery where to be enioyed : therefore such ought an husbands care for his wife in this respect to be , as to dwell where she may haue the benefit of preaching the word , or else so to prouide for her , as she may weekly goe where it may be had . If men of wisdome and abilitie make a purchase , or build an house for their habitation , they will be sure it shall be where sweet riuers and waters are , and good pasture ground , and where all needfull prouision may be had . Gods word preached is a spring of water of life ; the place where it is preached a pleasant , profitable pasture ; all needfull prouision for the soule may there be had . Let this therefore be most of all inquired after : and no habitation setled but where this may be had . §. 48. Of neglecting their wiues edification . Contrary is their practise , who hauing their calling in places where the word is plentifull , yet vpon outward respects of pleasure , delight , ease , and profit , remoue their families into remote places where preaching is scarce , if at all ; and there leaue their wiues to gouerne the family , not regarding their want of the word , for as much as they themselues oft comming to London or other like places by reason of their calling , enioy the word themselues . Many Citizens , Lawyers , and others are guiltie of great neglect of their wiues in this respect . So also are they , who abandon all religious exercises out of their houses , making their houses rather stewes of the deuill , then Churches of God. If for want of meanes , either publike or priuate , a wife liue and die in ignorance , profanenesse , infidelitie , and impenitencie , which cause eternall damnation , assuredly her bloud shall be required at his hands : for an husband is Gods watchman to his wife . §. 49. Of an husbands prouiding things needfull for his wiues boay . To the body also must an husbands prouident care of his wife extend : and that both in health and sicknesse . In health by prouiding such things as are needfull to preserue health , as competent food , raiment , and the like necessaries . Where the b Prophet to aggrauate the misery of the people saith , Seuen women shall take hold of one man , saying , We will eat our owne bread , and weare our owne apparell , only let vs be called by thy name , intimateth , that it was an husbands dutie to prouide bread and apparell , that is , all necessaries for his wife . Which the c law also implieth , where it inioyneth him that taketh one wife vpon another , not to diminish the food and raiment of the former . In sicknesse such things are to be prouided as are needfull either to recouer her health , or to comfort , cherish and refresh her in her sicknesse . This was * before noted among common mutuall duties ; for by vertue of the matrimoniall bond it belongeth both to man and wife : but to the man it appertaineth by vertue of that power and charge which he hath ouer his wife : and therefore it was needfull here to be touched . §. 50. Of an husbands prouident care for his wife about her child-bearing . Most proper to this place is that prouident care which husbands ought to haue of their wiues both before and in the time of their trauell and child-bed : and that in two things especially . 1. In procuring for their wiues to the vttermost of their power and abilitie , such things as may saue their longing , in case they doe long ( as in all ages women in the time of breeding and bearing childe , haue beene subiect thereunto . ) For it is well knowne , that it is very dangerous both for mother and childe to want her longing : the death sometimes of the one , sometimes of the other , sometimes of both hath followed thereupon . 2. In prouiding such things as are needfull for their trauell and lying in childbed . This time is especially to be prouided for , in many respects . 1. Because it is a time of weaknesse , wherein the woman cannot well prouide for her selfe . 2. Because her weaknesse is ioyned with much paine : the paine of a women in trauell is the greatest paine that ordinarily is endured by any for the time : none know it so well as they that feele it : and many husbands because they are not subiect thereto , thinke but lightly of it : but if we duly weigh that the holy Ghost when he would set forth the extremitie of any paines and pangs , resembleth them to the paines of a woman in trauell , we may well gather , that of all they are the greatest : which is further manifested by the screekes and outcries which not only weake , and faint-hearted women vtter in the time of their trauell , but also are forced from the strongest , and stoutest women that be , and that though before hand they resolue to the contrary . Neither may we wonder thereat ; for their body is as it were set on a racke ( if at least the trauell be sharpe ) and all their parts so stretched , as a wonder it is they should euer recouer their health and strength againe : or that they should hold out the brunt , and not die with their trauell , as Rachel , and the wife of Phinchas , and many in all ages haue done . Surely among ordinary deliuerances I know none so neere a miracle , none wherein the Almighty doth so euidently manifest his great power and good prouidence , as in the safe deliuerie of women . Besides the great pang of trauell , women are also after their deliuerie subiect to many after-throws which are very painfull . From all these paines and great weaknesse which befalleth women in childbed , especially if they nurse their children , men by reason of their sex are freed : Now then to apply this point , seeing women are brought to such paines and weaknesse in bringing forth those children which are the man 's as well as hers , and he freed from all ; is it not very iust and meet that he should prouide all things needfull for her welfare , ease , and recouery of strength ? 3. Because the want of things needfull is at that time very dangerous : dangerous to the health and life of the woman and childe also . §. 51. Of neglecting wiues in their weaknesse . Contrary to an husbands prouident care in generall are those vices which were taxed in the treatise of common duties , as grudging at the charges bestowed on a wife : Couetousnesse , Prodigality , and Idlenesse . But contrary in particular to an husbands care for his wife in childbed , is the inhumane and more then barbarous vnkindnesse of many husbands , who no whit consider the weaknesse of their wiues in this case , to helpe , ease , and comfort them , but rather make their burden much more heauy . For , 1. Some through couetousnesse refuse before hand to afford meanes to their wife to prouide such things as are needfull for her selfe and child : & when the time commeth , if their wife be desirous of a Midwife that requireth somwhat more charges then she that is next , she shall haue none if she will not haue the next . And as for a nurse to tend her , they thinke their Maid will serue the turne wel enough : they need not be at the charges to bring a Nurse into the house . In regard of conuenient lodging some will not sticke to say , Cannot my wife be brought to bed in a roome without a chimney as well as the Virgin Mary ? Why should my wife need more things then she did ? Yea further there be many that whē the time that their wife should be deliuered approacheth neere , carie her from al her friends into a place where she is not knowne , lest her friends should by importunity draw him to expend and lay out more vpon his wife then he is willing . In the time while their wife is weake in childbed , many are loath to allow them any other diet then is for themselues and children prouided in the house , not considering that her stomach cannot be like theirs . Many other such bitter fruits of vnkinde husbands arising from couetousnesse might be reckoned vp , whereby husbands plainely shew that they loue their wealth better then their wiues : they had rather lose them , then part with that . 2. Others through iealous suspicion forbeare not euen in the time of their wiues paine and weaknesse , to vpbraid them with lightnesse , and to say that the childe is none of theirs . To lay this to a wiues charge vniustly , is at any time a most shamefull and odious reproach : but in the time of childebirth whether iust or vniust , a thing too too spightfull and reuengefull . Some wiues are so farre ouercome thereby , ( especially in the time of their weaknesse ) as they are not able to beare it , but euen faint and die vnder the reproach : others more stout vow neuer to know their husbands againe . Many like mischiefes follow on such vnkindnesse . §. 52. Of an husbands * prouiding for his wife according to his estate and abilitie . In an husbands prouiding for the body of his wife respect must be had to the measure , and to the manner . The measure must extend to his ability : for an husband ought to maintaine his wife in as good an estate and fashion as himselfe ; by mariage she is aduanced to as high an estate , and dignity in relation to others as he is : and for her owne vse she is made a partner of all his goods , and accordingly ought to partake thereof . For the manner , he must suffer her ( if at least he obserue her to haue any competent discretion ) to order such things as are needfull for her selfe according to her best liking : as Elkanah in another case said to his wife , Doe what seemeth thee best . Both in the measure and in the manner of prouiding , there must be a difference put betwixt a wife , and seruants or children . These may haue their portions of meat , apparrell , and like necessaries , proportioned out and stinted vnto them , which is vnmeet to be done to a wife . Neither is it needfull that so plentifull a prouision be made for them as for her . §. 53. Of an husbands nigardlynesse to his wife . Contrary is an husbands nigardly dealing with his wife : when the allowance she hath is both farre vnder his estate , and also so giuen her by little and little , as if she were a childe . Many husbands make their wiues drudge at home , fare hardly , and goe meanly ; who are themselues braue in apparrell , frolicke in their feasting abroad , and so exceed their wiues as they are ashamed to be seene in company with them . They who marry their maids , or others of meaner ranke then themselues , oft so deale with them : esteeming them but as seruants and meane persons though they be their wiues . But it hath beene * before shewed , that wiues by marriage are aduanced to their husbands dignity , how meane soeuer they were before . §. 54. Of husbands * allowing their wiues to bestow on others , as they see good occasion . So farre ought the prouident care of an husband for his wife to extend , as she may haue ( beside things needfull to her selfe ) to bestow on such as it is requisite for her to giue vnto : as namely , on children and seruants in the house , and others also out of the house . For so much is noted in Salomons description of a good wife ; She giueth meat to her houshold , and a portion to her maidens : all her houshold is clothed with scarlet ( namely , by her ordering and disposing the matter . ) Her children rise vp and call her blessed , as for her generall cariage in the family , so for her particular fauours bestowed on themselues . As for others out of the house , it is also noted , that she stretcheth out her hand to the poore , and reacheth forth her hands to the needie . These things she did by virtue of that power and liberty which her husband gaue her : as appeareth by two points there noted : 1. In that before any mention is made of those things which she did , it is said , The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her . 2. In that , after all her good deedes are reckoned vp , it is said , Her husband praiseth her . After this patterne it is meete that other husbands ( whose wiues are wise and faithfull ) should deale with their wiues : that in the house they might haue the more honour of children and seruants : and that out of the house they might giue the better tryall of their charity . For considering the many excellent promises that are made to workes of mercy and charity , and the many terrible threatnings that are denounced not onely against such as exercise cruelty , but also against such as shew no mercy : considering also that wiues together with their husbands , are heires of the grace of life , it is very needfull yea euen necessary , that they should manifest their faith by some worke of mercy and charity . Now vnlesse her husband doe giue vnto her something at her owne discretion to bestow on others , true and through try all of her mercifull and charitable minde cannot be made . If she giue of that which her husband hath reserued to himselfe , as her giuing is vnlawfull , so she may be thought liberall , not because she is mercifull , but because notwithstanding her liberality she parteth with nothing of her owne : yea though she haue a generall consent to giue as she seeth cause of the common goods of the family , yet is not that so sure and sound a tryall of her charity , and mercifulnesse , as if she had something of her owne which she might retaine or giue away as pleaseth her selfe ; and what she giues not away , lay vp as her owne stocke proper to her selfe . For there is naturally such a selfe loue in man , and a desire to keepe that which is proper to ones selfe , that he is very loath to part with any of it , vnlesse conscience and grace alter this corruption of nature , and so moue him readily to lay out something on charitable vses . But otherwise of that which in whole or in part belongeth to another ( be that other , husband , parent , master , friend , or any else ) he is easily moued to be liberall and bountifull : a man will willingly cut a large thong ( as we speake ) out of anothers leather . It is knowne that many children and seruants , who , when they come to be possessers of their owne , are very niggards and misers , haue beene liberall of their parents and masters goods vnto the poore . Yea parteners in a stocke will be much more forward in giuing away that which is common with another , then that which is proper to each of them . The truest triall of a mercifull and charitable heart lieth in the distribution of that which is proper to ones selfe . It is therefore meet vpon this very ground , that an husband should according to his ability let his wife haue some stocke , and portion of her owne , free to her selfe to dispose as she seeth good : intimating vnto her that the principall end why he prouideth so plentifully for her , is , that she may shew forth the fruits of her faith by some workes of charity : and exhorting her so to doe . Many religious , wise , kinde husbands thus doe : some giuing quarterly allowance in money to their wiues , others giuing their wiues power to receiue a certaine portion of rent out of certaine lands or houses ; others making their wiues an absolute estate of some inheritance , and suffering them to receiue the profits and reuenewes thereof ; others giuing them certaine fees of their offices , or of their trade ; others , that are poore , suffering them to worke for themselues , & dispose their earnings as they see cause : some one way , some another : euery one in his place best knoweth the meanes how to gratifie his wife in this kinde : it shall be sufficient for me to haue laide downe the generall rule . §. 55. Of husbands too great straitnesse ouer their wiues . Contrary is their strait-handednesse to their wiues , who allow them no more then may be for their owne priuat vse . They thinke it a great matter and as much as an husband is bound to doe , to let her haue apparrell , meat and drinke , and such necessaries as are befitting her ranke , but all other ouerplus they thinke needlesse . Thus their wiues are not only depriued of meanes to gaine respect of their children and seruants at home , and to gratifie such as are obedient and ready to doe seruice to them , but also to performe such workes of mercie as both opportunity requireth , and also their conscience moueth them to doe . Yea many wiues of rich husbands are brought to great shame hereby , in that being in places where there is iust occasion of contributing to some charitable vse , and by reason of their rich and costly apparell it is expected they should be bountiful , they haue not any thing at all to bestow . The fault of some husbands in this respect is great many waies . As 1. in that they bring shame and griefe to their wiues , whom they ought with all tendernesse to respect . 2. In that they dishonour their owne places : for they who take notice of this straitnesse to their wiues , will be ready to iudge them both couetous , and vnkinde . 3. The omitting of that worke of mercie which their wiues should haue done shall be laid to their charge : they shall heare that dreadfull doome ; Goe yee cursed into euerlasting fire , for I was an hungred and yee fed me not &c. and if they answer , When saw we thee an hungred &c. it shall be replied , In that yee suffered not your wiues to doe it , you did it not . Thus much of the extent of an husbands prouident care for the good of his wife . It followeth to speake of the continuance thereof . §. 57. Of an husbands care to prouide for his wife so long as she shall liue . The continuance of an husbands prouident care for his wife must be so long as she liueth , yea though she out-liue him : not that he can actually when he is dead prouide for her , but that he may before his death so prouide for her , as she may haue wherewithall to maintaine her selfe , and to liue according to that place whereunto by him she is aduanced : at least that he leaue her not only so much as he had with her , but something more also in testimony of his loue to her , and care for her . Husbands haue the example of Christ to presse this duty vpon them : for when he went away from his Church here on earth , he left his spirit , which furnished it with gifts as plentifully , as if Christ had still remained with her , if not more aboundantly . For the better performance of this duty , husbands which die before the wiues , must obserue among other things two especially . 1. That plainly and expresly they declare their minde and will before they die , lest their wiues should be circumuented and defrauded of that which they intended them . Thus did Dauid vpon the motion of Bathshebah , he setled his estate , and caused Bathshebahs sonne to be actually crowned before he himselfe gaue vp the Ghost : which he did , as for other weighty reasons , so in particular for his wiues good , as may be gathered from that reason she alleaged to the King in these words ; Else when my Lord the King shall sleepe-with his fathers , I shall be reputed vile . 2. That he request some faithfull friend in his steed to be an helper vnto her ; ( as Christ commended his mother vnto his disciple Iohn ) which will be needfull in regard of her weaknesse , by reason of her sex , and want of experience to manage such affaires especially as are out of the house . At the time of a mans departure out of this world from his wife , will the truest triall of his affection to his wife be giuen : for many that beare their wiues faire in hand while they liue with them , at their death shew that there was no soundnesse of affection in their heart towards them : all was but a meere shew for some by-respects . §. 58. Of husbands neglect of their wiues future estate . Contrary are diuers practises of vnkinde husbands . For 1. Some through improuidence , vnthriftinesse and prodigality , disable themselues from doing good to their wiues after their death ; and so leaue their wiues nothing , or ( that which is worse then nothing ) in debt , and with a great charge of children . That care which husbands ought to haue of their wiues should make them thinke before hand of the time to come , and euen for their wiues sake be some-what the more diligent , thrifty , and prouident , and cut off many vnnecessary expences , else their sinne is doubled . 1. By a needlesse wasting their estate . 2. By neglecting their wiues . 2. Others by fawning , or forcing meanes draw their wiues to yeeld vp that interest they haue in money , goods , house or land by ioynter , inheritance , or any other way , and yet make them no sufficient recompence in another kinde : but at their death leaue their wiues in a farre worse estate then they were in before mariage , beside a greater charge then they had before . As this is a great part of vnkindnesse , so also a maine point of iniustice . 3. Others grudging against the lawes vnder which they ●iue for prouiding for a wife by thirds or otherwise , vse all the ●raudulent meanes they can to depriue her of that which otherwise the law would lay vpon her . The ciuill politique awes of the place where we liue ought to be the rule of our ciuill actions ( so farre as they are not repugnant to Gods word ) and we ought for conscience sake to be subiect vnto them . Besides an husband ought ( though the law forced him ●ot ) to leaue at least the thirds to his wife , as a testimony of his loue to her , and care for her : so as this also is a dou●le fault . 1. A transgression of the law . 2. A note of vn●indnesse . 4. Orthers hauing aged and sickly wiues , or otherwise ●hinking that their wiues may , or rather hoping that their ●iues will die before themselues , put off the making of their wills of purpose that they might not put in their wiues thirds , but dispose them some other way . Besides that these husbands shew no good affection towards their wiues , they prouoke God to disappoint them of their hopes : and so he doth often-times : for he taketh them away before their wiues , and so taketh them away , as hauing no time to make their will , not only their wiues enioy their thirds ( which they so much desired to auoid ) but also some other ( whom of all in their life time they misliked ) seaze vpon the other two parts . §. 58. Of an husbands protecting his wife from danger . Hauing shewed how an husband is to prouide things needfull for his wife : It remaineth to shew how he is to protect her from things hurtfull . In regard of that protection which an husband oweth his wife , he is called the veile of her eies : which phrase as it implieth Subiection on the wiues part , so also Protection on the husbands : to protect one , is as it were , to couer them , namely , from danger ; to be negligent and carelesse of them , is , as it were , to lay them open to danger . The same duty is implied vnder another like phrase of spreading his wing ouer his wife . The metaphor is taken from winged fowles , which to keepe their young ones from hurt , vse to spread their wings ouer them : this phrase and metaphor is also attributed to God , to set forth his protection . But most pertinent to this purpose is the title , * Saniour , giuen to an husband in relation to his wife . For this end the Lord who subiected a woman vnto her husband , gaue to his sexe greater strength , courage and boldnesse then to hers , that he might protect her which is the weaker vessell . In this duty of protection Christ sheweth himselfe an excellent patterne and president vnto husbands . The better to performe this dutie , an husband must bee carefull , 1. To preuent , as much as he may , such dangers as his wise is like to fall into . 2. To recouer her out of such as she is fallen into . For this purpose did Dauid carry his wiues into Gath , lest , if they were left in Israel , Saul should worke them some mischiefe : and againe , when they were taken by the Amalakites , he recouered them . According to that danger whereunto wiues are subiect , must an husbands care of protecting his wife be manifested . 1. If she be in danger to be seduced and inticed , as Euah was , by any euill instruments of the deuill , as Iesuits , Priests , Friers , profane , blasphemous , lasciuious , or riotous persons ; his care must be either to keepe them away that they come not at her , or to put them away from her so soone as he can : he may not suffer them to harbour in his house . 2. If by any sleight she be drawne from his house , he must seeke her , and fetch her againe , as the Leuite did his wife : or cause her ( if he can ) to be brought home againe , as Dauid caused Michal to be brought : especially if they be taken away by force , as Ahinoam , and Abigail , Dauids wiues , were . 3. If she be vniustly slandered , he is to maintaine her credit and reputation as much as his owne : as Christ accounteth himselfe despised , when his Church is , so must he . This care must he haue of his wiues credit , euen after her death , as well as while she liueth . 4. What other mischiefe so euer is intended or practised against her , he must be a tower of defence to protect her , ( as Ahoshuerosh was to Ester against Haman ) and that not only against strangers without the house , but also against children and seruants in the house . Children growne to yeeres , that are stout and stubborne , will be ready to rise vp against their mother , especially if she be a mother in law , because she is the weaker sex : the countenance of a father for the most part keepeth most in awe . Wherefore the husband must be an helpe to his wife , and maintaine her honour against them : yea though they be children of a former wife . §. 59. Of an husbands maintaining his wife against children of a former venter , and seruants . Obiect . Mothers in law often proue vnkinde , and vniust stepmothers , and deale vnmercifully with their husbands children : must an husband in such cases assist his wife against his children ? Answ . The protection , I speake of , is in case a wife be wronged , then her husband is to doe what he can to right her ( as we speake . ) But if she be the wrong-doer , he may by no meanes boulster her vp against his children , and so make their wrong the greater . Yet so far ought he to respect his wife , as by all the faire meanes he can , to labour to pacific her minde , and turne her heart towards them : and if he obserue her heart to be cleane alienated from them , then to put them forth to be brought vp in some other place , and so to take away from her the obiect of her displeasure , that he and she may liue more quietly together . For if a man must forsake father and mother , he must also forsake children , and cleaue to his wife . Peace and vnitie betwixt man and wife must of all other be kept inuiolable . Though thou cast away all , nothing can happen more troublesome to thee then not to haue a quiet wife at home . Thou canst finde no sinne more grieuous then to haue contention with a wife . If a wife must be maintained against the stubbornnesse of children , much more against the insolencie of seruants : for which purpose the example of Abraham is recorded , whose seruant might haue a priuiledge aboue others , because he had made her his bedfellow ; yet when she waxed insolent against her mistresse , first he put her into her mistresses hand to doe to her as it pleased her ; and afterwards he cast her out of his house . §. 60. Of neglecting to maintaine their wiues . Contrary is a dissolute carelesnesse of husbands , who care no more to helpe and succour their wiues then any other . 1. Some more feare to offend their wiues then they care to doe them good , and in that respect they let any sort of people come to their wiues that are welcome to them . If Magistrates in a Common-wealth shall answer for suffering seducers to come into their dominions to deceiue their people , much more shall husbands answer for suffering them to come and deceiue their wiues . 1. Because they haue a greater charge ouer their wiues then Magistrates ouer their people . 2. Because wiues ought to be dearer to husbands then people to Magistrates . 3. Because they may sooner espie them in their house , then Magistrates in the Common-wealth . 4. Because they may be much more easily kept out of an house , then out of a Common-wealth , or a Citie . 2. Others care not whither their wiues wander : and if they doe goe out of their house , they shall neuer be sought after by their husbands : though this may be a iust punishment on wandring wiues , yet is it not iust for husbands so to deale with them . If Christ our husband should so deale with vs , we should soone be lost : for wee oft goe astray like wandring sheepe , but hee is that good shepherd , who seeketh after the lost sheepe vntill he finde it . 3. No maruell then that many husbands are no more affected with the ill reports and rumors raised against their wiues , when they so little regard who come to them , or whither they goe . Assuredly the discredit of a wife will turne to the mans dishonour : for as a vertuous wife is a crowne to her husband , so by the rule of contraries , an infamous wife is a shame to her husband . If therefore not for his wiues sake , yet for his owne sake a man ought not too carelesly passe ouer the ill reports which are raised against his wife . 4. There be such vnkinde husbands as are moued with no ill vsage done vnto their wiues , nor will heare any complaint that they make vnto them : yea if they see them misused , they will either not seeme to see it , or but smile at it , and so goe their way , and suffer their wiues to right themselues as well as they can . As this beseemeth not any Christian to suffer his neighbour to be wronged , ( for it is noted as a commendable matter in Moses , that when he saw two Hebrewes striuing together , he tooke his part that had wrong done to him , and reproued the other ) so much ●esse an husband , to whose safe-guard his wife is committed . Nature teacheth vs that the head is as much affected with a wrong ●one to the bodie , as to it selfe : so ought an husband . 5. As the wrong which is done by those who are in subiection ●n the house vnder the wife , is greater then that which is done by ●trangers : so is the husbands fault the greater in suffering it : for ●e hath more power ouer them in his house , then ouer others . What then may we thinke of such , as either by their conniuence , ●r by taking part against their wiues , suffer both children and ser●ants to insult ouer them ? Assuredly those husbands themselues will finde some smacke of the bitter and euill fruit thereof : ●●d that not only by that great discontent which their wiues must ●eeds take thereat ; but also by that contempt which will follow on their owne persons , both by their wiues ( who cannot thinke them meet heads to gouerne others ) but also by their children and seruants , who thereby will take occasion to waxe proud , and presumptuous against him . By despising the weaker , men grow by little and little to despise the stronger . This men of wisdome and experience well know : whereupon in Common-wealths and Policies gouerned by wise men , the authoritie of inferiour Magistrates is vpheld and maintained : superiour Magistrates will not suffer them who are in authoritie vnder them to be despised : for it is well knowne , that it tends not to the honour and ease only , but to the safetie also of the supreme Magistrate , to haue the power and authoritie of inferiour Magistrates respected , and not trampled vnder feet . It argueth therefore both want of affection , and of discretion and vnderstanding in husbands , to suffer childe , seruant , or any other in the house , to insult ouer their wiues , who are ioynt gouernours with them ouer the house . §. 61. Of an husbands first beginning to loue his wife . The generall matter together with the particular kindes of husbands duties being thus farre handled , The manner also of performing them is to be deliuered . To instruct an husband in the manner of performing his duties to his wife , the Apostle laieth downe two patternes , 1. Christ , vers . 25. 2. Our selues , vers . 28.   As Christ loueth his Church , and as we loue our selues , so must men loue their wiues . That we may the better follow these patternes , we must distinctly note how Christ loueth his Church , and how we loue our selues . The loue of Christ to his Church is commended vnto vs in six seuerall points : which are 1. The order 4. The qualitie thereof . 2. The truth 5. The quantitie   3. The cause 6. The continuance   I. For the Order , Christ began to loue his Church : he mafested his loue to her before she loued him : as the aire heated by the Sunne is hote , and a wall on which the Sun-beames smite , giueth a reflexion of heat backe againe : so the Church , as it were heated and warmed at heart by the sence of Christs loue , loued him , as the Apostle expresly noteth , ( We loue him because he loued vs first : ) and the Church her selfe acknowledgeth saying , Because of the sauour of thy good ointments ( wherewith we are reuiued , and cheered ) the virgins loue thee . There is in vs by nature no sparke of loue at all : if Christ by his louing of vs first , did not instill loue into vs , we could no more loue him then a liuing bird rise out of a cold egge , if it were not kept warme by the dammes sitting vpon it . Thus must an husband first begin to loue his wife . His place of eminencie , and authority requireth , that he should be to his wife , a guide , which title is expresly giuen to him by the holy Ghost , to teach him to goe before her , and by his example to instruct , and incite her to doe her dutie . What a shame would it be for a man who is the Image and glory of God , the head of his wife , in the same place to her that Christ is to his Church , to be prouoked by his wiues wiue-like carriage ( she being the weaker vessell , vnder him , to learne of him ) to loue her ? * Reasons there be to stirre vp a wife to indeauour to preuent her husband in doing her dutie , which if she doe , it is the greater glory to her ; but this patterne of Christ should stirre him much more to striue to goe before her . §. 62. Of husbands repaying vnkindnesse for loue . Contrary , is their disposition , who hauing louing and dutifull wiues , are notwithstanding nothing moued to loue them againe : but are as vnkinde and churlish as if they had the most ●eeuish , and peruerse wiues that could be . But what shall we say of such as loue their wiues the lesse , yea and hate them for their forwardnesse to loue , and ( in testimony of true loue ) to performe all good dutie ? What , but that they are very deuils ●ncarnate ? For it is the deuils property to ouercome good with cuill . These make the doctrine of a wiues subiection to seeme harsh , and a carefull performance thereof , an heauy burden . Neuer shall they partake of Christs loue , that in their place ●ew themselues so vnlike to Christ . §. 63. Of the truth of husbands loue . II. The truth of Christs loue was manifested by the fruits thereof to his Church : He gaue himselfe for it . It was therefore not in word only , no nor only in heart , but in deed also . Thus his loue proued profitable , and beneficiall to his Church , which thereby was clensed , and made a glorious Church . Had he only borne a tender compassion and pittifull affection towards it , or laboured only with comfortable and sweet words to vphold and succour it , it had still laine polluted with sinne , in the power of the deuill , and vnder Gods wrath , and so receiued no profit and benefit at all . So must husbands loue their wiues in truth and in deed . * Such a loue is required of a man to his brother : much more therefore to his wife , who is not only a sister ( as * the Apostle expresly stileth her ) but neerer then sister , mother , daughter , friend , or any other whatsoeuer . This therefore serueth to presse the practise of all the forenamed duties appertaining to an husband . §. 64. Of husbands dissimulation . Contrary is their dissimulation and hypocrisie , who make great shew of much loue , and pretence of earnest affection , vsing many outward complements , but faile when they come to the truest triall , the deed . Some like suters or wooers , will promise mountaines , but not performe moul-hills : others will coll and kisse their wiues much , but trust them with nothing , nor prouide for them things requisite : there be that will weepe much when their wiues are sicke , yet not afford physicke and such like things for their recouery : yea many will carrie a faire face all their life long towards their wiues , and at their death leaue them nothing to liue by . Hence it is that many who by others are accounted to be very kinde husbands , are by their wiues found to be farre otherwise . If triall be made of husbands loue by their practise and performance of the forenamed duties , it will be found that they for the most part come as farre short in loue , as wiues in subiection . §. 65. Of the freenesse of husbands loue . III. The cause of Christs loue , was his loue , as Moses noteth , He set his loue on you , because he loued you . His loue arose only , and wholly from himselfe , and was euery way free : as there was nothing in the Church , before Christ loued her to moue him to loue her , so can there be nothing that he could hope for afterwards , but what himselfe bestowed . Indeed he delighteth in that righteousnesse wherewith , as with a glorious robe , she is clothed ; and with those heauenly graces , wherewith as with pretious Iewels she is decked : but that righteousnesse , and those graces are his owne , and of his free gift , He presents it to himselfe a glorious Church . In imitation hereof husbands should loue their wiues , though there were nothing in wiues to moue them so to doe , but only that they are their wiues : yea though no future benefit could after be expected from them : true loue hath respect to the obiect which is loued , and the good it may doe thereunto , rather then to the subiect which loueth , and the good that it may receiue . For loue seeketh not her owne . Christs loue in this branch thereof should further moue husbands to doe what lieth in their power , to make their wiues worthy of loue : thus will it be in truth said , that they dwell with their wiues according to knowledge : and thus will their ●oue appeare to be as Christs loue , free . §. 66. Of husbands louing for aduantage . Contrary is their loue which is only for their owne content ●nd aduantage . Many can loue no further then they may haue ●ome bait to allure their affections , as beauty , wealth , honour , ●r the like by-respects ; or at least hope of some inheritance or ●ortion aboue that which they haue , or of some fauour that they ●xpect from their wiues friends . This cannot be a true sound ●●ue : such a man may be thought to loue his wiues beautie , ●●heritance , and friends rather then his wife . This loue cannot last . §. 67. Of the puritie of husbands loue . IIII. Christs loue for the qualitie is an holy , pure , chaste , ●●ue : as he himselfe is , so is his loue , as is euident by the ●●fect thereof : for it moued him to sanctifie and clense his Church , to make it a glorious Church without spot : he did therefore no way pollute or defile his Spouse : and that his loue might the better appeare to be chaste loue , cast only vpon one Spouse and not many , he vnited all his Saints together by the bond of his Spirit , and made them all one body . Hereby husbands must learne so to be affected towards their wiues as may stand with holinesse , and chastitie : though much loue be required , yet it may not ouer-flowe those banks . Mariage is honourable and a bed vndefiled . It must therefore be vsed as an vndefiled thing . This indeed appertaineth to the wife as well as to the husband . But because he is the head , and guide of his wife , and ought to be as a patterne and president before her , as Christ is before him , therefore is it more specially applied to him . The puritie of an husbands loue here spoken of , hath a double vse , 1. It restraineth an husbands loue to his owne wife . There is a generall Christian loue whereby all occasions of doing good are taken , with which an husband may , and ought to loue others : and a particular matrimoniall loue , whereby he is moued to preferre his wife before all , and to haue his heart set and fixed on her , and so proper and peculiar to her . 2. It orders and moderates his loue , so as it turneth not into sinfull lust , whereby that estate , ( which in it selfe by vertue of Gods ordinance , is holy ) is polluted . §. 68. Of husbands lightnesse . Contrary , is not only adulterie , whereof we haue spoken * before , but also wantonnesse , lightnesse , and vncleannesse with his wife . For many intemperate and vnchaste husbands , giuing the raines to their headstrong lusts , manifest as much vnseemlinesse and plaine filthinesse in their words , gestures , and actions ( to say nothing of their thoughts which are not seene ) to their wiues , as other doe to strumpets and harlots which is a most shamelesse thing , and I am euen ashamed ● mention : but because it is mentioned , let such know , th● they shall be accounted among such whoremongers and adul●rers as God will iudge . §. 69. Of husbands louing their wiues more then themselues . The quantity of Christs loue cannot be expressed : for the measure of it was aboue measure . a He gaue himselfe for his Church , and in that respect he calleth himselfe that b Good sheepheard that gaue his life for his sheepe . c Greater loue then this hath no man. What will not he doe for his spouse , that gaue his life for her ? This may seeme to be too high a straine , and pitch of loue for an husband to attaine vnto : a matter wherein he is to ●eaue his patterne , and not to follow Christ : but yet S. Iohn addeth euen this extent to the loue of our brethren : We ought saith he ) to lay downe our liues for the brethren : therefore by ●ust consequence for our wiues . But that this extent be not stretched too farre , and husbands cast into a pit of needlesse ●erill , two cautions must be noted , 1. That there be an absolute necessity , to bring vs to this ●raite of parting with our life : which is , when the good we ●ime at in the behalfe of our wiues cannot any other way be ●ffected , but by venturing our life . There was no other way ●● redeeme the Church , but by the bloud of Christ . 2. That the good we intend in this case to our wiues be of ●reater valew then our temporall life : as is the good of her ●ule , the sauing of it . Thus the Apostle saith , I will most gladly bestowed for your soules . Which minde men must much more ●rie towards their wiues . It was for our saluation that Christ ●ue himselfe . §. 70. Of husbands vnkindnesse . Contrary is their vnkindnesse that preferre euery trifle of ●●eir owne before the good of their wiues : their profit , their ●easure , their promotion , cleane draw away their hearts and ●●fections from their wiues . If any extraordinary charge must ● laid out , or pains taken for their wiues good , little loue ●ll then appeare : whereby it appeares that there was no true ●●d sound loue setled in their hearts towards their wiues . As ●ld and other like mettals are tryed by the fire , so loue by ●●ictions and crosses . §. 71. Of combats in pretence of wiues honour . Contrary in another extreme is the ouer-bold and ouer-heady pretended manhood of such husbands as vpon euery iealous surmize and sleight report , are ready to make challenges of fight , and to enter into single combats and duels , on pretence of maintaining their wiues honour . This being no warrantable course of righting a wrong , no honour can redound to the wife thereby , but much dishonour and danger to the husband . If he preuaile ouer his aduersarie and kill , he is made guilty of murther thereby , and so reproach and shame must needs come to himselfe , wife , and whole family : if he be ouercome and slaine , she may be reputed more guilty then she was before . And oft it falleth out that God in iust iudgement giueth ouer the challenger into his aduersaries hand , because he hath vndertaken so indirect a course . §. 72. Of husbands * Constancy in loue . VI. The continuance of Christs loue was without date : a Hauing loued his owne , he loued them vnto the end . His loue was constant ( not by fits , now louing , then hating ) and b euerlasting ( neuer repenting thereof , neuer changing or altering his minde ) no prouocations , no transgressions could euer make him forget to loue , and cease to doe that good which he intended for his Church : note what he said to her euen when she reuoulted from him , Thou hast played the harlot with many louers , yet returne againe to me : and againe , My mercy shall not depart away . For his loue resteth not on the desert of his Church , but on the vnchangeablenesse of his owne will. As this manifested Christs loue to be true sound loue , so it made it profitable and beneficiall to the Church , which , notwithstanding her many frailties , by virtue hereof is glorified . This last branch must be added to all the former branches of an husbands loue , or else they will be all in vaine and to no purpose . This giueth the truest tryall of sound loue . Such was the loue betwixt Dauid and Ionathan : the soundest loue that euer was , betwixt partie and partie . This bringeth the greatest glory to the partie which loueth : and the greatest benefit to the partie which is loued . That a mans loue may thus remaine firme and inuiolable , 1. He must be sure to lay a good foundation ; he must ground his loue on Gods ordinance : and loue his wife in regard of the matrimoniall bond which knitteth them together , and that neere vnion which thence ariseth ; and so it will last so long as that knot lasteth . 2. He must further support and strengthen it with an inuiolable resolution to be changed and altered with no prouocation , but rather to passe by all infirmities ; indeauouring in loue to redresse them if possibly he can : if not , to beare with them . §. 73. Of husbands variablenesse . Contrary is their variablenesse , whose loue is ready to turne as a weather cocke with euery blast of a contrary winde : now ●ender-hearted , then againe hard-hearted : now smiling , then ●owring : now giuing this and that fauour , then denying euery thing , euen such things as are needfull . Many whose loue was as hot as fire while their wiues were ●oung , or their friends liued , or while they pleased them , when ●hose occasions are taken away , proue in their loue as cold ●s ice . Againe others by some continuance in doing good to their wiues , thinke it a burden : and waxing weary cleane leaue off ●heir former good course ; which plainly sheweth that they ne●er truly and intirely loued their wiues . By this patterne of Christ here propounded to husbands , ●e haue on the one side a good direction to teach vs how to ●●ue our wiues , as hath beene particularly declared ; and on the ●ther side , matter of humiliation , in that it sheweth vs how ●●re short we come of our bounden duty . Howsoeuer , wiues ●ay most complaine of their burden , because it is a Subiection●hereunto ●hereunto by nature we are all loath to yeeld : yet I am sure ●●e heauiest burden is laid vpon the husbands shoulders : and ●uch more easie it is to performe the part of a good wife , then a good husband . §. 74. Of husbands louing their wiues * as themselues . To the example of Christ the Apostle annexeth the pat●●ne of ones selfe , in these words : So ought men to loue their ●●es as their owne bodies . Quest . Is not the former patterne sufficient ? Is this latter more excellent , or more perfect ? Answ . Christs example is a full , compleat , perfect , and euery way sufficient patterne ; farre more excellent then this of a mans selfe : this is not annexed to adde any thing to that , or in regard of the excellency hereof , but only in regard of our dulnesse , to make the point somewhat more plaine and perspicuous . For this patterne is more sensible and better discerned . Euery one knoweth how he loueth his owne body : but few or none know how Christ loueth his Church . Besides , that example of Christ may seeme too high and excellent for any to attaine vnto , euen inimitable ; therefore to shew that he requireth no more then a man may performe , if he will set himselfe with care and conscience to doe his duty , he addeth the patterne of ones selfe ; that which one doth to his body , if he will , he may doe to his wife . No direction can be taken from this latter patterne , but might be referred to the former , as most of the former ( though in a farre meaner manner ) may be referred to the latter . For the loue which a man beareth to himselfe is true , and intire without all dissimulation : the most dissembling wretch in the world ( who in his dealings with other men doth nothing vprightly ) nor will nor can dissemble with himselfe ; though other men shall neuer know the depth of his heart , yet the spirit which is in him , euen himselfe , knoweth it : so as this patterne also presseth truth and sincerity on husbands in their affection towards their wiues : of all other they may not dissemble and deale doubly with them ; but let them know the intirenesse of their affection towards them : and see they neither faune o● them , nor flatter them . They which pretend great loue to their wiues in shew only , offend against nature it selfe . As the foresaid loue of a mans owne selfe is for manner intire and true , so also free not forced : and for measure as great as possibly i● can be , and for continuance , constant , and so like to Christ loue . But there are two points especially to be considered in the loue of ones selfe which aboue others are most sensibly discerned in this patterne . 1. Tendernesse . 2. Cheerefulnesse . No other man will or can so tenderly handle a mans hand arme , legge or any other part of his body , as himselfe : he is very sensible of his owne smart . The metaphors which the Apostle vseth in these words , He nourisheth and cherisheth it , doe liuely set forth this tendernesse : for they are taken from fowles and birds which very charily , and tenderly houer ouer their young ones , couering them all ouer with their wings and feathers , but so bearing vp their bodies as no weight lieth vpon them . Thus ought husbands with all tendernesse , and mildnesse to deale with their wiues , as we haue before noted in many particulars : only this example of a mans selfe I thought good to set before husbands , as a liuely patterne wherein they might behold a president without exception , going before them , and whereby they might receiue excellent direction for the better performing of the particulars before noted . Againe , no friend , no parent , no other party will or can so willingly and cheerefully doe any kindnesse for one , as a man for himselfe . This among other is one especiall point which the law aimeth at , when it enioynes a man to loue his neighbour as himselfe , namely , as willingly and readily as himselfe . Whatsoeuer a man doth for himselfe he doth much more cheerefully then for another . There needeth no other proofe then experience . Let men take notice of their owne minde and disposition when they doe things for themselues , and this will be as cleere as the light when the Sunne shineth forth at ●oone day . Such an affection ought husbands to haue to their wiues : they ought more willingly and cheerefully to doe any thing ●or their wiues then for parents , children , friends or any other . Though this cheerefulnesse be an inward disposition of the ●eart , yet may it be manifested by a mans forwardnesse and ●●adinesse to doe his wife good : when his wife shall no sooner desire a kindnesse , then he will be ready to grant it : as ●ooz saith to Ruth , I will doe to thee all that thou requirest ; yea , by any meanes he may know that this or that will be be●oofull to her , though she desire it not , yet to effect it for her : which was the minde of the said Booz to Ruth , as the history ●● many particulars sheweth . Contrary is the disposition of those husbands who so grudgingly , repiningly , and discontentedly doe those things which they doe in their wiues behalfe , as their wiues had rather they were not done at all . The manner of doing them causeth more griefe to tender hearted wiues , then the things themselues can doe good . Hitherto of the manner which husbands ought to obserue in performing their duties . The reasons to inforce the same remaine to be handled . §. 75. Of Christs example , a motiue to prouoke husbands to loue their wiues . The forenamed examples of Christ and of our selues as they are patternes for our direction , so generall motiues to prouoke and stirre vs vp the more to performe all the forenamed duties after the manner prescribed . A greater , and stronger motiue cannot be yeelded then the example of Christ . Example in it selfe is of great force to prouoke vs to doe any thing : especially if it be the example of some great one , a man of place and renoune . But who greater then Christ ? What more worthy patterne ? If ( as was * shewed ) the example of the Church be of great force to moue wiues to be subiect to their husbands , the example of Christ must needs be of much greater force to moue husbands to loue their wiues . A great honour it is to be like vnto Christ : and his example is a perfect patterne . Two things there be which in Christs example are especially to be noted to moue husbands to loue their wiues . 1. That great inequality which is betwixt him and his spouse . 2. That small benefit which he reapeth by louing her . For the better discerning of that inequality , the greatnesse of Christ on the one side , and the meanesse of the Church on the other , are duly to be weighed . Christs greatnesse is in Scripture set forth by comparing him with creatures , and the Creator . Compared with creatures he is farre more excellent then the most excellent , as the Apostle by many arguments proueth in the first chapter to Hebr. that whole chapter is spent in proofe of this point : And in another place it is said that a He is set farre aboue all principality and power , and might , and dominion , and euery name that is named not only in this world , but also in that which is to come . Compared with the Creator he is no whit inferiour to him , but b equall : c Being the brightnesse of glory , and the expresse image of his person : and that d word of whom it is said , In the beginning was the word , and the word was with God , and the word was God : All things were made by him &c. So as he is the very Creator himselfe , eternall , infinite , incomprehensible . Thus is Christs greatnesse inexplicable . The meanesse of the Church is as low on the other side : she is a creature , fashioned out of the earth , proceeding from the loines of corrupt Adam , not only finite , but in it selfe vile and base : The Prophet e Ezechiel doth set her forth in her liuely colours as she is in her selfe . Compared therefore vnto Christ she is f nothing , lesse then nothing . What equality , what proportion can there then be betwixt Christ and her ? But if man and woman be compared together , we shall finde a neere equality : and that both in the points of their humiliation , and also of their exaltation . In regard of the former , they are both of the same mould , of the same corrupt nature , subiect to the same infirmities , at length brought to the same end . In regard of the latter the best and greatest priuiledges are common to both of them : they are both made after the same image , redeemed by the same price , partakers of the same grace , and heires together of the same inheritance . Quest . What is then the preferment of the male kinde ? What is the excellency of an husband ? Answ . Only outward and momentany . Outward , in the things of this world only : for g in Christ Iesus they are both one . Momentany , for the time of this life only : for h in the resurrection they neither marie , nor are giuen in mariage , but are as the Angels of God in heauen : then all subiection of wiues to husbands ceaseth . To conclude this point , the inequality betwixt Christ and the Church , and equality betwixt man and wife being such as hath beene declared ; seeing Christ vouchsafeth to loue his Church , ought not man thereby be moued to loue his wife ? The other point concerning the small benefit which Christ reapeth by his Church , will yet further inforce the point : for illustration whereof we will note the great benefit which man reapeth by his wife . The benefit which Christ reapeth from the Church is in one word nothing . For Christ is in himselfe Al-sufficient : he neither needeth any thing , nor can receiue any thing : i If thou be est righteous , what giuest thou to him ? Or what receiueth he of thine hand ? Yet abundantly he bestoweth all manner of gifts , temporall , and spirituall , earthly and heauenly . It was not therefore his owne good that he respected in louing the Church , but her good : for he being k God became man ; being Lord of heauen and earth , he tooke vpon him l the forme of a seruant ; being m rich he became poore : hauing the n Keyes of hell and of death , and being o the Lord of life , he p humbled himselfe , and became obedient vnto the death : thus to shew loue to his Church he left much for her sake , but receiued nothing of her . But the benefit which man reapeth from a wife is very great : for q It was not good for a man to be alone : in so much as r He who findeth a wife findeth a good thing ; and that in all the points of goodnesse , a profitable thing , a comfortable thing , a delightfull thing . They know not the benefit of the maried estate , who * prefer single life before it , especially if the maried estate be ordered by Gods word , and man and wife carefull to performe their owne duty each to other . To apply this point also , and to bring it to the conclusion : If Christ who can receiue nothing from the Church notwithstanding loue her , ought not men much more to loue their wiues , who many waies receiue much good from them , and without whom they cannot well be ? This example of Christ is the rather to be noted , because it cleane wipeth away all those false colours , and vaine pretences which many alledge as reasons , to shew that there is little reason they should loue their wiues : some of their pretences are these . 1. Their wiues are of a farre meaner ranke then themselues ; should they then performe duty to their inferiours ? They commonly who marrie their kitchin maids , or others farre vnder their degree , alledge this pretence . Answ . I might reply , That mariage aduanceth a wife to the degree of her husband : and that it was his owne follie to marrie one so meane : but for the purpose and point in hand , let any tell me , whether the supposed disparitie betwixt them & their wiues , be in any degree comparable to that which is betwixt Christ and the Church : yet Christ thinketh not much to doe duties of loue to his Church . 2. There is nothing in their wiues worthy to be loued . Answ . This very thing , that such an one is thy wife , is matter enough to make her worthy of loue . But what was there in the Church to make her worthy of Christs loue ? If it be said that she is endued with many excellent graces , which make her amiable in Christs sight : I answer , that of her selfe she hath none of those graces , Christ hath bestowed them vpon her , and so made her ●miable : and thus oughtest thou to endeuour by vsing all good meanes thou canst to make thy wife answerable to thy loue : but howsoeuer , to loue her . 3. Their wiues giue iust occasion to be hated by reason of their beeuishnesse , stoutnesse , insolencie , and other like intolerable ●ices . Answ . No occasion may seeme iust to moue an husband to hate his wife : nor any vice seeme to him intolerable : with goodnes he ●●ught to ouercome euill . If notorious sins seemed intolerable to Christ , or that he thought any occasion iust to cause hatred , many ●hat are of his Church would oft draw his hatred vpon them : but Christ hateth neuer a member of his Church . 4. There is no hope that euer I shall receiue any helpe of my wife , or benefit from her . Ans . There is little charitie in such as can conceiue no hope : for ●ue hopeth all things : but yet the case so standeth with Christ . The Church is so vtterly vnable to help or benefit him , as he may iustly ●y , he cannot hope to receiue any thing frō her . Christ loueth the ●hurch for her own good , not for his ; so ought husbands . Thus if Christs example be well weighed , & obserued of husbands , it will ●ford matter enough to remoue euery doubt or scruple raised to ●enate their affections from their wiues . Fitly therefore hath the Apostle set it before husbands , both to direct them how to loue their wiues , and also to moue them so to doe . §. 76. Of a mans loue to himselfe , a motiue to prouoke him to loue his wife . To the same purpose that Christs example tendeth , tendeth also the patterne of a mans selfe . Great is the affection that a man beareth to himselfe , to his owne flesh , his owne bodie : he neuer hateth , but euer loueth himselfe : no sore , no disease , no paine , no stinch that the flesh bringeth to a man , can make him hate it : but rather all manner of infirmities doe make him the more to pitty , tender , and cherish it . This is a worke of nature : the most heathenish , and barbarous , that euer were , doe it . Now a wife being to a man as his bodie and his flesh ( for they two are one flesh ) and God hauing commanded men to loue their wiues as their owne bodies , these conclusions will necessarily follow from this motiue : 1. He that loueth not his wife is more caried with the instinct of nature , then with the expresse charge of the God of nature . Natures instinct moueth him to loue his bodie . But Gods expresse charge moueth him not , to loue his wife . 2. He that loueth not his wife is worse then an infidell and a barbarian , yea then a very beast : for all these loue their owne bodies , and their owne flesh : but a wife ( by Gods ordinance ) is as ones bodie , and his flesh . 3. He that loueth his wife loueth himselfe : the Apostle himselfe in these very words layeth downe this conclusion : from whence by the rule of contraries this also will follow , He that loueth not his wife , loueth not himselfe . 4. He that loueth not his wife cannot but bring woe and mischiefe vpon himselfe . For the damage and mischiefe which followeth on a wife , through any neglect of dutie on her husband part , followeth also on him : as the mischiefe which followeth on the bodie through any negligence of the head , lighteth also on the head . If these be not motiues sufficient to prouoke an husband to loue his wife , I know not what can be sufficient . The fifth Treatise . Duties of Children . §. 1. Of the generall Heads of Childrens duties . EPHES. 6. 1. Children obey your Parents in the Lord : for this is right . 2. Honour thy father and mother ( which is the first commandement with promise . ) 3. That it may be well with thee : and thou maist liue long on the earth . THe second couple in a familie are Parents . Children . In laying downe their duties , the Apostle beginneth with children : his direction , and instigation vnto them is laid downe in the three first verses of the sixt chapter : wherein 1. He declareth their dutie . 2. He addeth reasons to inforce the same . In laying downe their dutie he noteth three points . 1. Wherein it consisteth , ( obey , honour . ) 2. To whom it is to be performed ( your parents . ) 3. After what manner it is to be done ( in the Lord. ) The reasons vsed by the Apostle are foure . 1. The place of parents ( in the Lord. ) 2. The aequitie of the thing ( this is right . ) 3. The charge of God ( Honour thy father , &c. ) 4. The reward promised ( That it may goe well , &c. ) Vnder this word ( obey ) which the Apostle vseth , and that word ( honour ) which the law vseth , are all those duties comprised , which any where thorowout the whole Scripture are inioyned to children . We will therefore set them downe in some order , and handle them distinctly one after another . 1. The Fountaine of childrens duties is to be searched out . 2. The Streames that flow from thence are to be obserued . The Fountaine is an inward disposition of the heart compounded of loue and feare . The Streames issuing from thence extend vnto parents , both while they are liuing , and also when they are dead . Childrens duties which are to be performed to their parents while they liue , haue respect to their Authoritie . Necessitie .   The Authoritie of parents requireth of children Reuerence . Obedience .   Their Necessitie requireth Recompence . The duties which children owe to their parents deceased , respect their Body . Credit .   Their Body with decency must be buried . Their Credit with honour must be maintained . §. 2. Of Childrens loue to their Parents . I make the fountaine of childrens duties to be a mixed and compound disposition , in respect of that authoritie and affection which is mixed together in parents . The authoritie of parents requireth feare in children : and their affection , loue . So intire and so ardent is parents affection towards their children , as it would make children too bold and insolent if there were not authoritie mixed therewith to worke feare : and so supreme and absolute is their authoritie ouer them , as it would make children like slaues to dread their parents , if a fatherly affection were not tempered therewith to breed loue . But both these ioyned together make a very good composition : loue like sugar sweetneth feare , and feare like salt seasoneth loue : and thus , to ioyne them both together , it is a louing-feare , or a fearingloue , which is the ground of childrens duties . Where Christ forbiddeth an excessiue loue in children to their parents , he implieth that parents are a fit obiect for children to loue ( so as their loue be wel moderated : ) yea he implieth that it is an affection euen by nature ingraffed in children to loue their parents . Ioseph is commended vnto children as a worthy patterne in louing his father , and that from his youth till the decease of his father : in testimony whereof in his younger yeeres he brought to his father the euill report of his brethren , whereby he incurred their enuie and hatred , which he would neuer haue done , if he had not loued his father : and hauing beene long absent from his father , when by Gods prouidence there was offered an occasion for him to meet with his brethren , one of his first questions to them was about their father : and hearing that he was liuing , he thought it not enough to send him food for his need , but must also needs see his face , and haue him dwell with him : and while his father was in the way he went out to meet him , and at first sight fell on his neck , and wept a good while ( a token of great affection . ) That loue which naturally parents beare to their children , ought in equitie to breed in children a loue to their parents . For loue deserueth loue : and most vnworthy are they to be loued , who cannot loue againe . The loue of parents aboue all others is to be answered with loue on childrens part to the vttermost of their power , because it is free , great , and constant . Besides , there is a necessitie of loue in children to their parents , lest for want thereof , their subiection ( which of all others ought to be most free ) should turne into slauish seruitude . This ought children the rather to labour after , because by nature they are nothing so prone to loue their parents , as their parents are to loue them . Loue is weightie , and , as weighty things , it descendeth . Children therefore with conscience of dutie must labour to make supply of this defect , and helpe nature by grace . I denie not but naturally there is in children a greater loue to their parents , then to others : yet in comparison of the heat of parents loue to them , their loue to their parents is but cold . Wherfore as the heat of the Sun shining much and long on a stone wall , draweth a reflection of heat from that wall : so the hot beames of parents loue , which with feruency and constancy is cast on children , ought to prouoke and stirre vp children to send forth a reflection of loue on their parents . Two extreames are contrary to this affection of loue . One is want of naturall affection , which is a vice most odious and abominable in all , but most of all in children . The Apostle reckoneth this among the most heighnous vices that be . The other is hatred and despight of parents : a vice more then monstrous , and vnnaturall . From thence commeth mocking and cursing of parents , whereof we shall afterwards heare . §. 3. Of a childes feare of his parent . To the forenamed dutie of loue , must feare be added , which is a childes awfull respect of his parent . This awfull respect ariseth from an honourable esteeme which a childe in his iudgement and opinion hath of his parent , as he is his parent ; and from it proceedeth on the one side , a desire and indeauour in all things to please the parent , and on the other side a loathnesse to offend him . In this respect the feare of a childe is opposed to the feare of a slaue . For a childes feare being mixed with loue , hath respect to the offence which a parent may take ; but a slaues feare , which is ordinarily mixed with hatred , hath respect to nothing but the punishment which his master may inflict vpon him . The forenamed feare is so proper to children , as that awfull respect which the Saints beare to God , is called a * siliall or child-like feare . This feare in a childe is an especiall branch of that a honour which the law requireth of children to their parents : and it is in b expresse termes inioyned to children by the law . That phrase which God vseth of Miriam ( c If her father had but spit in her face , should she not be ashamed seuen daies ? ) sheweth that there ought to be such a feare of the parent in a childes heart , as should worke shame in it when the parent is offended . A worthy patterne we haue hereof in d Iaakob , who was loath to gaine the blessing with offence of his father . This feare keepeth loue in compasse : and restraineth a childe from ouermuch saucinesse , and malipartnesse . And it is a cause of a childes reuerend and dutifull carriage to his parent . For as the heart is affected the carriage will be ordered . Contrary hereunto is that light , or ( which is more abomi●nable ) that base and vile esteeme of parents , which is in the heart of many children : especially if parents be poore , of low degree , vnlearned , ignorant , or subiect to any infirmities . It cannot be but that c Cham had too light , if not a base esteeme of his father , when he derided him . A true filiall feare would haue restrained him from that extreme . Wherefore to breed and cherish this feare , and to preuent , ●r redresse the contrary extreme , let children well informe themselues of their parents place and authoritie , how they are in Gods stead , and a meanes vnder God of their childrens being : children haue receiued their very substance from the sub●tance of their parents . In which respect though they should ●eeme contemptible to others , yet not to their children . Thus much of a childes inward disposition towards his parent . The manifestation thereof must be by his outward carriage : and that in two things ; Reuerence , and Obedience : both which respect a parents authoritie . §. 4. Of a childes Reuerence in refraining speech before his parent , and in hearkening to his parent . The outward reuerence which children owe to their pa●●nts consisteth partly in their speech , partly in their carriage . Their speech both to and of their parents must sauour reuerence . To their parents in presence . OF their parents in absence . In presence , by refraining their speech . well framing     For refraining speech two vertues are requisite Silence . Patience .   Silence in forbearing to speake . breaking of speech .   Patience in hearkening to their parents . The two branches of silence , in forbearing to speake ( espe●●●lly when parents are speaking , or till parents giue leaue to their children to speake , ) and in breaking off speech , when parents come into the place where children are speaking , are tokens of great reuerence . Thus children testifie that there are some in place whom they much respect and honour . Iob doth thus set forth the respect which Princes and others did beare to him in his prosperitie , The Princes ( saith he ) refrained talking , and laid their hand vpon their mouth , the Nobles held their peace , &c. Namely , while he was in presence , or while he spake . The like may be said of childrens patience in induring their parents speech ; which Iob also noteth in these words , Vnto me men gaue eare , and waited , and kept silence . Though parents in their speech seeme to be long and tedious , yet must children indure it . And it is very needfull that patience be added to silence , because many parents in tender loue of their children , and earnest desire of their good , thinke they can neuer speake enough in instructing and admonishing them . The many exhortations giuen in Scripture vnto children to heare , hearken , giue eare , giue heed , marke , and obserue the words of their parents , doe imply the forenamed silence and patience : for they who ought to be swift to heare must be slow to speake . I denie not but much more is intended vnder those phrases , namely , obedience : yet must these also be presupposed : for he that will not in silence patiently hearken to his parents while they speake , will much lesse obey what they say . Contrary to silence is sawcinesse ( as we speake ) and ouermuch boldnesse in children , when , without due respect of their parents presence , they will be prating of this thing or that thing : insomuch as if strangers should come into the roome where such children are , they would not thinke that their parents were in presence ; or if they knew it , they might well thinke that such children beare little respect to their parents . Contrary to patience in hearing , is fretting and murmuring against parents ( if at least their speech be any whit long ) an● flinging or slinking away before they haue done . These faults are the greater , if children by their loquacitie , or impatiencie hinder or interrupt their parents speech when they are giuing any admonition or instruction : for thus they shew both too light a respect of their parents : and also too little regard of the meanes of their owne good . §. 5. Of a childes reuerend framing his speech to his parent . A childes reuerence in well framing his speech to his parents may many waies be manifested , as 1. By giuing vnto them reuerend and honourable titles . No title can be more honourable then that which is most proper and vsuall , Father to the one parent , and Mother to the other . God taketh the title a Father vnto himselfe , as a title of great dignity . Obiect . This title is so proper to God , as * We are to call none ●n earth Father . Answ . This is not simply to be taken of the title it selfe , but of the minde of him that giueth or affecteth that title . If it be affected or giuen to obscure Gods Fatherhood , or to make a man a Father of himselfe without dependance on God , ●r reference to him , who is properly the father of all , it is an ●mpious and sacrilegious title . But otherwise lawfull and warrantable . In Scripture the title Father is giuen to all degrees of dignities among men , as to b Kings , c Captaines , and other chiefe Gouernours , to d Priests , e Prophets , f Apostles , and other g Ministers . In the fift commandement all superiours are compri●ed vnder it , therefore Father is a title of great honour : and ●y the rule of relation Mother is a title of as great honour to ●●e female sex . Religious and dutifull children haue euer vsed ●● giue those titles to their parents . My Father , saith h Isaak to Abraham , and i Iaakob to Isaak . k My Mother , saith Salomon to ●athsheba . I finde also the title of l Sir or Lord , vsed : a title ●f honour . 2. By vsing few words before their parents : and those few ●ot without iust occasion , being first spoken to by their pa●●nts , or hauing leaue of them , or making knowne to them me needfull matter : at least not against their parents liking , as their parents should be offended thereby . And if they ●bserue their parents to be vnwilling to heare them speake any ●ore of such and such a matter , then ought they to lay their hands vpon their mouthes , as Isaak ( Gen. 22. 7. ) and Iaakob ( Gen. 27. 12. ) This is a token of great respect . 3. By meeke and humble speeches . Such was the speech of m Ionathan the naturall sonne of Saul , and of n Dauid his son in law , wherewith he was much contented , and his wrath pacified . 4. By obseruing a fit opportunity : as when parents are not seriously busied , or in company , or in passion . When o Saul was out of passion , how well did he accept Ionathans Apologie for Dauid ? but p in his passion , how ill did he take it ? This wise obseruing of fit opportunity sheweth great reuerence . 5. By a present , ready , willing , pleasing answer , when by their parents they shall be spoken vnto . Eli was as a father to Samuel : therefore when q Samuel thought that Eli called him , he presently and readily answered , Here am I : and when Eli was instant to know what the Lord had said to him , r Samuel told him euery whit , and held nothing from him . s The younger son ( noted in the parable ) shewed a sonne-like reuerence in giuing a willing and ready answer to his father , though he failed in his obedience , by not performing what he promised . §. 6. Of the vices in children contrary to the forenamed reuerence in speech . Contrary to those branches of reuerence in speech are , 1. Pride : when children scorne to giue the title of Father , or Mother , to their parents . This is the minde of many who haue gotten more wealth or honour , then euer their parents had . In publicke especially such children most refuse to giue those titles . Salomon was not so minded . He being a great king , sitting vpon his throne , in sight and hearing of all his people that were about him , called Bathsheba Mother . If children had that regard to the honour of their parents which they should , they being themselues in places of honour and dignity , would the rather openly call their parents Father and Mother , that they might be knowne to be the father and mother of so eminent a person . 2. Loquacity , and too much importunity , or rather impudency in speech , when children hauing to doe with their parents , can neuer haue done ( as we speake ) but must needs v●● matters to the very vttermost . Many parents are oft much prouoked hereby . It skilleth not that the childe haue the right , especially in a matter of no great consequence . For reuerence sake the childe must forbeare , at least for a time . And if the matter of difference be weighty , as in points of religion , the child must either take some other opportunity of better informing his parent , or else get some other wise friend to doe it . 3. Stoutnesse , when children answer their parents as if they were their equals : giuing word for word . It doth as ill become children to answer againe , as seruants ( to whom the Apostle hath expresly forbidden it , Tit. 2. 9. ) Both law and nature forbiddeth children to be prouoked hereunto , by any thing that their parents say or doe ; how great then is their fault who giue scornefull and stout words to their parents when they are no way prouoked , as the elder sonne noted in the pa●able , and the elder brother of the prodigall childe ? 4. Indiscretion , when children haue no respect to any time , businesse , or temper , of their parents in speaking to them , and so , much prouoke them . It is laid downe as a caueat to parents , that they prouoke not their children to wrath . How much more must children obserue that cauear ? 5. Stubbornesse , when children pout , loure , swell , and giue ●o answer at all to their parents . This is too common a fault in children , and many parents are much offended and grieued ●hereat . We heard * before of a childelike silence which was ●ery commendable , and a token of great reuerence ; but this is worthy of much blame , a token of great vndutifulnesse ; and carefully to be avoided , as that to be practised . §. 7. Of childrens reuerend speeches of their parents . So true and intire ought that reuerend respect to be which children beare to their parents , as their speech not only them●efore ●efore their faces , but also of them behinde their backes , must 〈◊〉 so framed both for matter and manner , when they haue any ●●casion to fall into speech of their parents , as all that heare ●●em may note them to beare a reuererend respect to their ●●rents . As a generall direction for the better performing of this ●●ty , let children speake nothing of their parents that they would be loath should come to their parents eare . More particularly , let them speake of those things which most tend to their commendation , that so ( as Christ said of his father ) they may honour their parents . Let other things be buried in silence so much as in them lieth . And if others speake of matters disgracefull to their parents , let them interpret in the better sense things doubtfull , and , so farre as they may , extenuate things euident , and sharply reproue them that slander their parents . This is that blessing which children owe to their parents , for neglecting whereof the wiseman taxeth children saying , There is a generation that doth not blesse their mother . Contrary to that kinde of blessing is discouering of parents infirmities , noted in cursed b Cham , and broaching vntruths of them , noted in impious c Absolom , and mocking and cursing them d expresly condemned . The reward whereof is by e Gods law death : yea a shamefull and ignominious death , for the f Rauens of the valley shall plucke out his eies , and the young Eagles shall eat it : g which phrase setteth forth the end of a notorious malefactor that is hanged . §. 8. Of a childs reuerend cariage to his parent . As the speech , so the cariage of children towards their parents must be seasoned with reuerence : for 1. This is a fruit , and proofe of filiall feare as well as that . 2. Of the two , this is the surer euidence : for actions are better signes of the disposition of the heart then words . 3. Faire words ioyned with contrary deeds , cannot but be accounted meerely complementall and hypocriticall . 4. Where there is a contrariety betwixt words and deeds , the one will be a witnesse against the other , and that mans condemnation the greater . Wherefore let all reuerence be manifested in childrens behauiour to their parents , and that in these and such like instances . 1. If a parent be comming to a childe , and the childe obserue it , let him haste to meet his parent : so did a Ioseph to his father , and Salomon to his mother . Which two examples are the rather to be noted , because both were in eminent place : one a great gouernour , the other a king . 2. Let such child-like obeisance be performed as becommeth the age and sex , either in going to , remaining before , or going from a parent : as vncouering the head , bending the knee , bowing the body , standing vp , with the like . The two forenamed eminent persons , c Ioseph and d Solomon , bowed , the one to his father , the other to his mother . 3. Let the countenance , and gesture of the body be so soberly and modestly ordered in the presence of the parent , as may argue due respect . 4. Let the vpper place , and hand be giuen to parents : and if occasionally a childe be aboue his parent , let him come below him . For that is a manifest token of inferiority and subiection . What maketh men to striue for the vpper hand , but because they would be accounted better then those with whom they striue ? But that ought not to be the minde of children to their parents . Quest . What if children be in estate more wealthy , or honourable then their parents , are they then to giue the hand to them ? Answ . No honour is comparable to the dignity of fatherhood : it giueth a greater eminency to the parent ouer his childe , then any other honour can to the childe ouer his parent . I grant that a childe may by some office , and outward dignity be so aduanced aboue his father , as other men may more honour and reuerence the childe , and giue the vpper place to him : and for order sake the childe may and ought to take it in company : but when they are alone , the childe must rather reuerence the father . 5. According to the custome of the time and place wherein they liue , let children aske their parents blessing . §. 9. Of childrens asking their parents blessing , whether it be lawfull or no. Some doubt is made of this duty both in regard of the thing it selfe , and also of the gesture of kneeling vsed in the performance thereof : I will therefore distinctly proue both . For the thing , it is noted of Iaakob that he carried sauory meat to his father , that he might blesse him : and of Ioseph , that he went to his father , and carried his two sonnes with him , that his father might blesse both him and them : for which end the twelue sonnes of Iaakob assembled to their father . Obiect . These were extraordinary examples : the Patriarchs were indued with the spirit of prophesie , whereby they reuealed to their children what their estate should be in the times to come : for knowledge whereof their children came to them . 1. Answ . Their blessings were more then predictions of things to come : they were confirmations and assurances to the children that God would indeed performe that blessing which their parents had pronounced . For they sustained a double person : the person of a Prophet , and of a father ; as prophets they foretold things to come : as fathers they obtained the blessings pronounced , and an assurance thereof to their children , and that by faith and praier . 2. Answ . Though all parents cannot with such an extraordinary spirit assure vnto their children any distinct particular blessing , yet the faithfull praier of parents is an especiall , and ordinary meanes to obtaine a blessing from God vpon their children : and that because of Gods promise which extends it selfe not only to fathfull parents , but also to their seed . Wherefore as the children of the patriarches came to their fathers to be assured of some extraordinary blessing , so may other children goe to their parents as a meanes to obtaine an ordinary blessing . It is noted of Eliah that by an extraordinary spirit in praier he obtained extraordinary matters : Yet the Apostle setteth forth that example to all Christians as a motiue to stirre them vp in faith to pray for ordinary blessings . But for further clearing of this point , note the phrase vsed in the fift commandement as a reason to moue children to honour their parents : this it is word for word , That they may prolong thy daies , &c. how can parents prolong their childrens daies , but by begging that blessing of God ? * The praiers then of parents are a great blessing to children , and children ought to seeke this blessing of their parents . Obiect . If parents be wicked , their praier is abomination : what blessing then can children looke for from wicked parents ? Answ . Though God heare not wicked parents in loue and goodnesse to themselues , yet for the good of their children he may and will heare them : and that the rather to maintaine a reuerend respect of parents in the heart of their children . For asking a blessing is an acknowledgement of superiority and authority , according to that of the Apostle , The lesse is blessed of the greater . Concerning the gesture of kneeling , it is answerable to the gesture which of old was vsed by Gods people in like case : of Ioseph it is said that he bowed downe himselfe with his face to the earth . Obiect . Kneeling is a gesture proper to Gods worship . Answ . It is not so proper , but that it may be vsed in ciuill cases : else Christ would haue reproued the young man for kneeling before him as well as for calling him good : for he conceiued Christ to be but a meere man , and the worship he did him was but ciuill . It is not simply the gesture , but the occasion of the gesture , the minde of him that performeth it , and the end why he performeth it that maketh it diuine , or ciuill . Cornelius fell down before Peter with conceit of some diuine excellency in him , and was not allowed : his manner of worshiping was diuine . The iaylor fell downe before Paul and Silas in acknowledgement of some outward eminency in them , and was not reproued : his manner of worshipping was meerely ciuill . The same gesture may be performed to different persons with a different respect . A childe may kneele to his parent , and to the king . Yet it followeth not that he maketh his parent a king . Neither will it follow that by kneeling to his parent he maketh him a God , because men kneele to God. §. 10. Of the vices contrary to childrens reuerend gesture towards their parents . Contrary to the forenamed branches of reuerend gesture , are , 1. Rudenesse and vnmannerlinesse , when children know not how to put difference betwixt their parents and strangers , but can suffer their parents to come to them , and they abide in their place and not stirre to meet them . 2. Disdainfull statelinesse , when they thinke much to stand bare-headed any while in their parents presence . It falleth out many times , that when parents and children are together before their betters , they will shew more reuerence then these : for the father will stand , and be vncouered , when the sonne sitteth downe and puts on his hat , vpon conceit that his father doth more reuerence then is meet : but if it were so , yet the sonne for the fathers sake should stoope somewhat the lower . 3. Wantonnesse and boldnesse , when children are ouer-familiar with their parents : toying and gigling vpon euery light occasion . This kinde of cariage cannot but much tend to the disgrace and dishonour of parents . For what can they who behold it thinke , but that such children haue beene too much cockered and ill nurtered ? 4. Ambition , when children are so ambitiously desirous of place , especially in companie , as rather then be vnder some whom they suppose to be at least their equals , they will be aboue their parents . This oft falleth out , when parents being of a lowly minde , giue place to such as their children , being of a lofty minde , thinke meaner then themselues . Now rather then they will be vnder their inferiours ( as they suppose ) they will be aboue their parents . A point of great insolencie . Such ought to be the respect of a childe to his parent , as he should debase himselfe below those that are his inferiours , rather then exalt himselfe aboue his parent . As with other men , for peace sake , in many cases , a man must depart from his right ; so especially with his parent , in case of superioritie . Would not euery one that knowes what honour a childe owes to a father , condemne that childs ambition , that should so stand vpon the place and hand , as to take them of his parent ? 5. An ouer-nice and erroneous opinion of those , who thinke it vnmeet for any childe to aske their parents blessing . Their owne conceit more swayeth them , then the continuali approued practise of Gods people in all ages : not vnlike him whom Solomon saith to be wiser in his owne conceit , then seuen men that can render a reason . Others , though they doe not so generally disa●ow this dutie , yet they thinke it meet only for yong children : not considering of what yeeres , stature , and state , Ioseph was , when he performed it . As for those , who thinke it not vnlawfull , yet carelesly neglect it , they little consider the benefit of a parents blessing . Profane Esau shall another day rise vp in iudgement against them . He beggd and beggd againe and againe , and that with a loud cry and salt teares , a blessing of his father . Thus much of childrens reuerence . Their obedience followeth . §. 11. Of childrens obedience . The obedience of children doth most proue the authoritie of parents , and is the surest euidence of the honour a childe giueth to his parent : therefore is it a by name in the text expressed , and all other duties are comprised vnder it . Reuerence without obedience is a meere mockage , nothing at all acceptable . Of the two , a childe were better faile in the former : instance the b parable of the two sonnes . Reuerence in comparison of obedience is but a complementall honour . Obedience is a true reall honour ; the surest triall of a dutifull childe . Obedience is a dutie so proper to children , as the Apostle applieth it to them as a proper attribute , saying , c as obedient children fashion not , &c. The example of Christ is herein set before vs as a patterne : d he was subiect to his parents . Solomon counteth the neglect thereof a e despising of a parent . Contrary is disobedience and rebellion : the greatest impeachment of parents authoritie that can be . For to what end is authoritie ouer those who resist it , and rebell against it ? The f Apostle reckoneth disobedient children among the lewdest persons that be : and setteth forth their disobedience by g a metaphor taken from vntamed , head-strong beasts , that will not be brought vnder the yoke : the word therefore is not vnfitly translated vnruly : and it is somewhat answerable to an h Hebrew phrase giuen to disobedient children , viz. sonnes of Belial , which is according to the notation as much as sonnes without profit ; or , as some will haue ●it , sonnes without yoke , that is , such children , as refusing to be in subiection vnto parents , are no way profitable , but worke much mischiefe , and cause great griefe . The i punishment which by Gods law was appointed to disobedient and rebellious children , was a publike shamefull death . §. 12. Of childrens forbearing to doe things without consent of parents . That children may the better know their dutie in this respect , I will distinctly set forth , both the parts , and also the extent of a childs obedience : 1. Wherein it consisteth . 2. How farre it extendeth . The generall parts wherein it consisteth are two : 1. A forbearance from doing things without consent of parents . 2. A performance of such things as parents will haue done . The former of these is a dutie whereunto children are must bound while they are vnder their parents gouernment . For that time the consent of parents is not only meet , but necessarie : and that for these reasons . 1. Children are as the goods of their parents , wholly in their power , to be ordered and disposed by them . On this ground Satan hauing all that Iob had put into his hand , tooke libertie ouer his children as well as ouer his goods and chattell . 2. Children while they be vnder gouernment , ( euen the eldest that are heires ) differ nothing from seruants . 3. By Gods law giuen to the Iewes , parents had power to sell their children . 4. Parents had power to disanull such things as children had done . Instance the case of a vow made to God , which was one of the most inuiolable things that one could doe . Contrary is the opinion and practise of many , who hold parents consent at the most but a matter of conueniencie : that it is good , if children will , to haue their parents consent : if they haue it not , the matter is not great : their contracts or other things which they doe , are as firme , and good , without , as with their consents . If this were so , wherein is the authoritie of a parent more then of a wise experienced friend ? It is meet , and good to haue such an ones consent . But that the power of parents , and dutie of children in this point , may the better be seene , I will exemplifie it in fiue particular cases . 1. Entring into a calling . 2. Making mariage . 3. Disposing of goods . 4. Ordering apparell . 5. Making vowes . §. 13. Of consent of parents for childrens entring into a calling . I. That children ought to haue the consent of their parents in making choise of their calling , and not place themselues as they please , is euident by the approued practise of the Saints recorded in Gods word . a Iaakob was sent by his parents to Laban to be educated vnder him . b Dauid was appointed by his father to keep sheepe : when Saul was desirous to haue Dauid attend vpon him , he sent to Ishai , Dauids father , for him . In that c Ishai was ●o carefull to send prouision to his three eldest sons that followed Saul to the warre , we may well thinke , that they went to the warre with his consent . It is noted of d Ionadab , that he appointed his ●onnes to dwell in tents , and that accordingly they did so , and are ●ommended and rewarded for this their obedience . It is collected ●oth by e ancient and f later Diuines , that our Lord Iesus Christ 〈◊〉 his younger yeeres , before he began to exercise his publike ministerie , occupied himselfe in his fathers trade : and that this was ●●e thing wherein he manifested his subiection to his parents . This collection is made by comparing Luk. 2. 51. ( where his sub●●ction is noted ) with Mar. 6. 3. and Mat. 13. 55. where he is cal●●d the Carpenter , and the Carpenters sonne . Equitie requireth that parents should haue an hand in placing ●●th their children , because they brought them forth into the ●orld , and brought them vp with much care , paines , and charge , ●hile they were young , and till they were fit for a calling . Besides , Godhath laid it as a charge vpon parents , that they ●ould see their children well trained vp : great reason therefore at parents consent be had in setting forth children to a calling . §. 14. Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens entring into religious orders without consent of parents . Contrary is the opinion of Papists , who say , that children may ●er into religious orders , not only without consent , but also a●●●nst the minde and good like of their parents . Whereby they 〈◊〉 not only patronize apparent disobedience in children , against the expresse word of God ; but also disable children from helping their parents in case of necessitie : for both which Christ rebuked the Scribes and Pharisies in a like case . Obiect . Papists doe grant that if parents be in such necessitie , as they cannot liue without their childrens helpe , their children may not by entring into any religious order forsake their parents . For they are bound by the law of God to succour their parents . Answ . 1. This caution hath beene extorted from them by euidence of argument taken from Gods word , and pressed by their aduersaries . 2. It toucheth not the principall argument taken from Gods precept , which they make of none effect by this their tradition . 3. Though parents be not at that present , when children first enter into their religious order , in such extreme need , yet they may be afterwards . But after that children are once entred , they hold it vtterly vnlawfull that children for any necessitie of the parent , should attend vpon them for their succour . Obiect . Children being entred into religious orders may helpe them , as becommeth religious persons , by their praiers to God. Answ . 1. This is iumpe the Pharisies Corban , whereof Christ maketh mention , Mar. 7. 11. and whereby he notably discouereth the hypocrisie of the Pharisies , who made pretence of religion , an hinderance to that obedience which God required of children . 2. To pray for that which a man indeuoureth not to doe , when he may doe it , is a plaine mocking of God. The arguments which they alledge for confirmation of their erroneous opinion , are taken from extraordinary examples , or from mysticall resemblances , as 1. Abrahams leauing his fathers house . 2. Leuies speech of his father and mother , who said , I haue not seene him . 3. The aduice giuen to the royall Queene , Forget thy fathers house . 4. The triall of our loue of Christ by louing him more then father or mother . 5. Christs forbidding one that followed him to goe and burie his father . Answ . 1. For Abrahams example , 1. it cannot be proued that he left his fathers house without the consent of his father . 2. He was then maried , and so of another house . 3. He had an expresse particular charge of God to leaue his fathers house , euen as he had to sacrifice his sonne . Except the like charge can be shewed , his example maketh nothing to the purpose . 2. For Leuies speech , 1. It was noted by Moses in relation to a particular zealous fact of the Leuites in executing the vengeance of the Lord , and so to be reckoned among such extraordinary things as are not exemplary . 2. That which moued the Leuites to make no difference betwixt their parents and others , was the Lords cause : their parents and kindred as well as others had notoriously sinned against God , and in that respect the Leuites took no notice of them . But they are not such parents which Papists teach children to forsake , but any parents . Now what consequence is this ; Some children haue been Gods Ministers in executing iust punishment on their wicked parents , therefore children may enter into such places as shall exempt them from helping any parents , though well deseruing ? 3. The Leuites had an expresse charge for that which they did : but that which Papists inferre from their example doth make the commandement of God of none effect . 3. For the * aduice to the Queene , 1. It is mystically to be taken . 2. If it should be literally taken , it is to be taken as giuen to her after mariage , when she was out of her parents gouernment . 3. It hath relation to the * law of mariage , ●nd implieth not a simple forsaking of parents , but a preferring of a husband before them . 4. For the louing of father and mother more then Christ , 〈◊〉 . It doth not necessarily imply a forsaking of our parents : ●or we may loue Christ more then them , and yet performe ●uty to them . 2. If they be forsaken , it must be in opposition to Christ , that either Christ or they must be forsaken , in that if we cleaue to them they will draw vs from Christ . 5. For Christs forbidding one that followed him to goe and burie his father : 1. It was because of an extraordinary calling which he had . 2. It is set downe as a patterne to Ministers , to shew that they should especially attend vpon their proper function , and leaue other secular matters to be performed by such as can performe them well enough . To apply it to childrens forsaking of parents , is to peruert the sense of it . Thus we see to how little purpose the forenamed arguments are alledged to proue that erronious opinion of childrens entring into religious orders without their parents consent . I might further shew how irreligious their pretended religious orders be , and so shew how vnlawfull it is to enter into them , euen with consent of parents : but that maketh nothing to the point in hand . §. 15. Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens trauelling , and binding themselues prentises without consent of parents . Contrary also to the forenamed part of childrens obedience , is the practise of such children as trauell , and seeke their fortunes ( as they speake ) without consent of parents , like the Prodigall childe , if not worse : for it is likely that he forced from his father a generall consent , in that he obtained of him his portion of goods . These vsually bring great griefe to their parents , and many times make them feare more then is cause , as old Iaakob feared , when he knew not what was become of his sonne . Among those aberrations may be reckoned a custome in this land more vsuall then lawfull , for children to binde themselues prentises without consent of parents : to which fault they who take indentures of such children , or otherwise couenant with them without knowledge of their parents consent , make themselues accessary . §. 16. Of parents consent to the mariage of their children . II. That children ought to haue their parents consent vnto their mariage is without all question euident . For 1. God himselfe hath giuen vs herein a patterne : He first brought the woman to the man ( Gen. 2. 22. ) whereby he would shew that he who gaue a being to the woman , had a right to dispose her in mariage : which right parents now haue : for from them vnder God , children receiue their being . In this case parents stand in Gods roome , and are as it were Gods hand to ioyne their children in mariage . 2. God hath giuen expresse lawes concerning this point . To omit that generall morall law , Honour thy father and thy mother ( which , as it is the ground of all other duties appertaining to children , so of this also ) the authoritie and charge which God by his law ( Deut. 7. 3 ) hath laid vpon parents , to giue their daughters to husbands , and to take wiues for their sonnes , hath the force of a law to binde children from taking wiues or husbands , without or against their parents consent . This law was not proper to the Iewes only ; but as a branch of the morall law it is pressed vpon Christians , 1 Cor. 7. 36. 37. To this may be added the iudiciall law ( if it be to be accounted meerely iudiciall ) of a parents power in giuing his daughter , or refusing to giue her in mariage to him that had defloured her , Exo. 22. 17. 3. Answerable to the law hath beene the practise of Gods Saints recorded and approued in Scripture . Isaak married the wife which his father prouided ( Gen. 24. 67. ) Iaakob both obeyed his father in going to Labans house for a wife ( Gen. 28. 2. ) and also when he came to Laban asked his daughter of him ( Gen. 29. 18. &c. ) Though Sampson saw a daughter of the Philistims which pleased him well , yet would he not marry her before he had his parents consent , Iudg. 14. 2. 4. These words of Thamar ( 2 Sam. 13. 13. ) Speake vnto the King ( who was her father , ) for he will not with-hold thee from me , shew that children were not wont to be married without consent of parents : Which is further confirmed by this oath of the Israelites , There shall not any of vs giue his daughter vnto Beniamin to wife , Iudg. 21. 1. 5. a The ancient fathers of the Church haue in their ages taught children this duty , and pronounced mariages of children without consent of parents , to be vnlawfull . 6. The very b heathen haue obserued the equity hereof . Though Shechem loued Dinah , and had defloured her , yet would he not mary her without the consent of his and her father , Gen. 34 , 3. &c. Ismael had learned as much either by the instruction he had receiued out of Abrahams house , or else by the light of nature ; for he stood to the choice which his mother made for him , Gen. 21. 21. 7. Though c Papists in other cases make the authority of parents to be of no effect , yet in this case they count it vtterly vnlawfull for children to marry without or against their parents consent : and haue thereupon made Canons against it . 8. The d law of nature and nations , the ciuill and canon law , the common and statute law of our Land , all manner of law is agreeable to Gods law in this point . 9. e It hath beene a custome in all Christian Churches throughout all ages , for the parent , or some in the parents roome , to giue the Bride to the Bridegroome at the time of the mariage : whereby the parents consent is openly manifested . 10. f Many Diuines of good note and name haue iudged such marriages as haue beene made simply without , or directly against parents consent ( especially if parents haue iust cause of exception against those mariages ) to be of no force till the parent be brought to ratifie them : and in many Churches vpon due examination of the matter , they vse to account them as no mariages . Experience hath manifested the boldnesse of many children in setting light by their parents consent in those places where mariages once consummated are ratified , and made indissoluble , though they haue beene made simply without or directly against parents consent . Many children thinke , though it be vnlawfully done , yet being done it shall stand . Whereupon if they doubt of their parents consent , they will cast how to get their mariage consummate , so as their parents may not know of it to hinder it before it is done : and after it is done , impudently resolue to beare out as well as they can , the storme of their parents displeasure . To preuent such contempt of the power of parents , and to establish that authority which God hath giuen them ouer their children , mariages without or against parents consent as aforesaid , are in many Churches made voide . §. 17. Of the equity of the point , and reasons why children should haue their parents consent vnto their marriage . 1. By mariage children are put from their parents : for * Man must leaue his Father and Mother , and cleaue vnto his wife . Is it not then great reason that they from whom children had their being , and by whom they haue beene maintained and trained vp till the time of their mariage , should haue notice of that kind of leauing them , and consent thereto ? 2. A parents power by the marriage of his childe is passed ouer to the husband or wife of the childe . And shall such a power be taken away without consent of parent ? 3. Children for the most part being heady and rash for want of experience ; and seeking more to satisfie their present carnall desire , then to prouide a good lasting helpe for themselues : but parents by the instinct of nature louing their children as well as children loue themselues , and hauing by much experience better vnderstanding of a meete helpe , and better able to vse their discerning gift in this case , because it is not their owne case , and yet the case of one whom they loue as themselues , and to whom they wish as much good as to themselues ; is it not meete euen for the childs good , that in a matter of such moment as mariage , the parent should haue a stroake ? §. 18. Of a childs cariage in case a parent prouide an vnfit mate or none at all . Quest . What if parents vrge their children to marry such as they can not affect and loue : must children therein against their minde and liking yeeld obedience ? Answ . If there be no iust exception against the partie commended , they ought with the vttermost of their power to endeauour to bring their affection to the bent of their parents will : and as an helpe thereunto , be perswaded that their parents are as carefull of their good as they themselues are , and wiser then themselues : yea aboue all they ought to make instant prayer vnto God ( in whose hand mans heart is to turne it whither soeuer he will ) that he would be pleased to alter the course of their affection , and to settle it on the party whom their parent hath chosen for them ; if at least they see no iust cause to the contrary . But if notwithstanding all the meanes that they can vse , they still finde their heart altogether auerse , they may in a reuerend manner entreat their parent to forbeare to presse that match , and to thinke of some other . 2. Quest . What if the parent be negligent , and in due time prouide no fit match , may not the childe prouide one for himselfe ? Answ . A parents negligence is not a sufficient pretext to make a child cast off that subiection which he oweth to his parent . Yet I deny not but that a childe knowing where a fit match is to be had , may make knowne as much to his parent ( as Sampson did ) and craue both his consent and help thereunto . And if his parent giue no eare to his humble suit , he may vse the mediation of his kindred or other friends . Yea if necessity require that the childe be married , and his parent adde wilfulnesse to negligence , and will not be moued at all , neither by the humble suit of his childe , nor by the earnest solicitation of any friends , meanes may be made to the Magistrate ( who is in Gods place ouer the parent as well as ouer the childe , and ought to afford releefe vnto the childe ) and what the Magistrate doth in that case is as good a warrant to the childe as if the parent had done it . The like meanes may be vsed if a parent be an Idolater , Hereticke , or Atheist , and will not yeeld that his childe be married to any but to one of his owne profession and disposition . §. 19. Of the sinne of Children in marrying without their parents consent . Contrary is the minde and practise of such children as ouer lightly esteeming their parents power , take matches of their owne choice : and that sometimes priuily without giuing any notice at all to their parents : and sometimes most rebelliously against their parents mind and charge : not much vnlike those who in the old world are condemned for taking wiues of all that they chose ( which was one branch of that wickednesse for which the world was drowned ) or rather like Esau who tooke such wiues as proued a griefe to his parents . What blessing can be expected to fall vpon such mariages ? or rather what curse may not be feared to follow them ? Gods law is transgressed thereby : his Image in parents despised , that which is more proper to them then any goods ; or fraudulently , or violently taken from them : their soules grieued thereat : and they oft prouoked to cast off their children , and curse their mariages . Now Gods curse doth oft follow the iust curse of a parent . §. 20. Of obiections for childrens marrying without parents consent , answered . 1. Obiect . Though Iaakob married one wife according to his parents direction , yet he married other three ( at least the two maides ) without their consent . 1. Answ . Iaakobs example in marrying more wiues then one is not iustifiable . 2. Answ . Iaakob had a generall consent of his parents to take a wife of the daughters of Laban : if therefore his marying of two wiues had beene lawfull , neither this nor that daughter had beene taken without all consent of his parents . As for the two maids of whom he had children , neither of them was his wife : for long after they had children they are called his maids , and distinguished from his wiues . 2. Obiect . Seruants may mary without their masters consent : why then not children without their parents ? 1. Answ . * It is not lawfull for seruants so to doe while the ●ate of their couenant lasteth . 2. Answ . Though the seruitude of a seruant be greater ●hen of a childe , yet a parent hath in many respects a greater ●ower ouer his childe , then a master ouer his seruant . The ●ower which a master hath is by a mutuall couenant betwixt him and his seruant , and by the voluntary subiection of a ser●ant vnto his master . But the power of a parent is by the bond of nature , in that a childe hath his being from his parents . Be●ides , this subiection of a childe to his parents in case of marriage , is not for seruitude but * for the good of the childe . 3. Obiect . Children marry for themselues and not for their parents , why then should parents consent be so much stood vpon ? 1. Answ . Though they marie not for their parents , yet they marie * from their parents : by mariage they are freed from the power of their parents . 2. Answ . Children are not their owne : they are the inheritance of the Lord : the Lord hath giuen them to parents as an inheritance : a childe therefore may no more marry for himselfe without consent of parents , then alienate his parents goods for himselfe . §. 21. Of stealing children from parents for mariage sake . To the * forenamed sinne , and to the vengeance thereof , doe they make themselues accessary , who fraudulently allure , or violently take away children to marry them otherwise then their parents would . This is a worse kinde of felony then stealing away the goods of a man. For children are much more properly a mans owne , then his goods : and dearer to him then any goods can be : yea and so much more highly to be esteemed , by how much reasonable creatures are to be preferred before senselesse , and sensuall things . Our * statute law expresly condemneth this , and imposeth a seuere punishment on such as shall offend therein . And iustly doe such offenders deserue to be seuerely punished , both in regard of the heinousnesse of the sinne , and also in regard of the many mischiefes which follow thereon , as , Alienation of parents affection from their children , Disinheriting heires , Enmity betwixt the friends of each party so married , Litigious suits in law , Ruine of families , and ( if the personages , whose children are married without their parents consent , be great and noble ) Disturbance of whole townes , cities , and nations . Instance the destruction of the Shechemites Gen. 34. * This is said to haue beene the cause of the tenne yeares warre betwixt the Grecians and Troianes , and of the ruine of Troy. §. 22. Of ministers sinne in marying children without parents consent . Such ministers also as through Carelesnesse , not taking due account of the parties whom they marie , whether they haue their parents consent or no ; or through bribery , being hired by reward , doe marie such children as they know haue not their parents consent ; doe in an high degree make themselues accessary to the * forenamed sinne . Their fact is as bad as the fact of the principals themselues . Their solemnization of such mariages emboldneth both the parties that are so maried , and also all the persons that are present thereat . They highly dishonour Gods holy ordinance , in that bearing the person of God they say of such as God hath forbidden to be so ioyned together , Those whom God hath ioyned together let no man put asunder . If ministers had not their hand in such vnlawfull mariages , they could not be made : for our Church ratifieth no mariage but what is made by a minister . Wherefore some minister or other is guilty of this foule sinne , whensoeuer any childe is maried without consent of parents . Well therefore doth our Church ( to preuent this sinne ) expresly forbid ministers to marie any without parents consent : and inflict a seuere censure on them that shall offend therein . §. 23. Of childrens forbearing to dispose any of their parents goods without consent . A third branch of the subiection of children in forbearing to doe any thing without their parents consent , is about their parents goods . That children though liuing in their parents house , ought not without their parents consent to dispose their goods , is euident by the extent of their obedience , in all things . In that Isaak was pleased to send Iaakob to Padan Aram without any great prouision , it seemeth that Iaakob made conscience of taking any thing priuily , but went as his father sent him a with his staffe . And the b apology which he made to Laban his father in law concerning things taken away , sheweth that he held it vnlawfull for children priuily to conuey ●way their parents goods . What is my trespasse ? what is my sinne ? ( saith he ) what hast thou found of all my houshold-stuffe ? Doth he not hereby imply , that if Labans daughters had ●aken away any of their fathers goods , it had beene a trespasse ●nd sinne ? The Apostle saith of the heire ( who of all the children may seeme to haue the greatest right ) that as long as he is a childe ( that is , vnder the gouernment of his parents ) he differeth nothing from a seruant , though he be Lord of all . If he differ not from a seruant , what right can he haue at his pleasure to dispose his parents goods ? Hath a seruant any such right ? It is very requisite that children herein should be tied to their parents consent , both for the good of parents , and of children themselues . Of parents , that they may know what they haue , or haue not , and accordingly order their expences . How can parents tell what they haue , if children priuily without their knowledge purloin and dispose their goods ? Of children , that their lauish humor might by this meanes be restrained : ( for youth is much prone beyond moderation to spend , if it haue wherewithall ) and that their parents may the better lay vp for them . §. 24. Of the sinne of children in purloining and wasting their parents goods . Contrary is both the opinion and practise of many children . For opinion , many thinke and say , that whatsoeuer is their parents , is theirs also : and thereupon being through the watchfull eie and prouident care of their parents restrained from ouerlauish spending , or from laying out any thing with their owne hands , they murmure against that restraint . Knowledge and perswasion of their subiection in this case , would be a good meanes to suppresse that repining humour . For practise , 1. Some priuily take away and purloine what goods , money , wares or any thing else they can come by of their parents . This the holy Ghost accounteth plaine theft : for Rachel hauing priuily taken away her fathers idolls , the Scripture saith that she stole them . Hereunto doe they make themselues accessary , who counsell and incourage children so to doe : as many busibodies , and deceitfull persons aduise daughters , when God hath taken away their mothers , to take away linnen , and other-like houshold-stuffe from their father , pretending that their father may marie another wife , who will carrie all away : And vpon like pretence also perswade sons when their fathers die , to conuey away what they can from their mother . But such pretences are no sufficient warrant vnto children to deceiue their parents . It were better for children to be depriued of their parents goods , then to enioy them with such deceit : for they will be like that bread which is sweet to a man , and afterward his mouth is filled with grauell . 2. Others riotously spend their portion , like the prodigall childe , and runne into debt , and so make their parents either to pay it , or to leaue them to the law . Many Schollers at the Vniuersities , Gentlemen at Innes of Court , and such children as are somewhat liberally trained vp in their parents , or other friends houses , doe much offend herein . Little doth this excesse and riot differ from the forenamed kinde of theft : and ordinarily it bringeth as many mischiefes as that doth . 3. Some also be so vngracious and vngratefull , that being come to yeeres , and their parents growne old , seeke to defeat their parents of all they haue , and to bring their parents vnder them , to be ordered by them : labouring to get possession of all before their parents be dead , or before they be willing to resigne any such right vnto their children . Such were Absolom , and Adoniah . How highly displeasing such practises are to God , the vengeance which fell vpon the pates of those two Brethren in euill , traiterous , and disloyall children , doth shew . All such children as seeke after the forenamed , or any other like meanes to defraud their parents , doe very ill repay their parents care ouer them , and more like Barbarians , then Christians , recompence euill for good : they oft bring pouerty and ignominy vpon their parents and themselues : they are worse then other theeues , because they are more deerely accounted of , and more freely trusted : yea they are a very bad example to seruants in the house , or subiects in the commonwealth . §. 25. Of childrens contentednesse to be apparelled after their parents minde and liking . IIII. A fourth branch of the foresaid subiection of children is about their apparell , that it be no other , then may stand with their parents good liking . It is noted that Israel made Ioseph a coat , doth not the particular mentioning of that circumstance shew , that parents must haue the ordering of their childrens apparell ? Which is also intimated in the reason giuen of Tamars garment of diuers colours , namely because with such garments were the kings daughters , that were virgins , apparelled . And whereas Rebekah had the keeping of her sonne Esaus clothes , it appeareth that his clothes were to the minde of his parents : else he would haue hid them from them : for further confirmation whereof it is noted that his apparell was pleasing to his father . Contrary is the vaine-glorious humour of many children , who to the griefe and discredit of their parents , apparell themselues both against the minde , and also aboue the ability , and vnbeseeming the place and calling of their parents . Among others , many ministers children bring much discredit on their parents hereby . Let all such proud Youths note how the Lord hath threatned to visit euen Kings children that are clothed with strange apparell . §. 26. Of childrens forbearing to binde themselues to doe any thing against their parents consent . V. The fift and last branch wherewith I will exemplifie the forenamed subiection of children , shall be that which is expresly noted in the law , namely a childes binding of it selfe by a vow . The law giueth the parent power to disanull his childes vow . It is therefore a childes dutie to abstaine from vowing without his parents consent . Contrary are such vowes as Papists allure children to make , namely , vowes of continencie , perpetuall virginitie , regular obedience , voluntarie pouertie , with the like . Though by these they be not drawne to forsake their parents ( which * before we proued to be vtterly vnlawfull : ) and though these in their nature were lawfull ( which they are not , because they are against Gods law and ordinance , and against Christian libertie , and sauour too rankly of Iudaisme , yea of a worse superstition , ) yet without parents consent might they not be made . As vnlawfull are oaths , and other like meanes , whereby children binde themselues to the performance of such indifferent things , as their parents are not willing they should doe . What doth this but bring a snare vpon the consciences of children , and cause a necessitie of breaking one of Gods commandements ? either the third , in breaking their vow or oath ; or the fift , in disobeying their parents . §. 27. Of childrens actiue obedience . The affirmatiue and actiue part of a childs obedience , consists in yeelding himselfe pliable to his parents will ; which must be added to the forenamed negatiue and passiue part of obedience in forbearing to doe things without consent of parents , for manifestation of a true child-like affection and disposition toward the parent . Passiue obedience may arise from meere fullennesse , and stoutnesse of stomach . For there are many who will forbeare to doe this or that without consent of parents , because they are loth to aske their consent : they had rather haue their owne wills crost in the things they desire , then be made subiect to their parents will. What doth this argue , but a stout stomach , and a disdainfull heart ? Besides , to forbeare the doing of an vnlawfull thing , is but to abstaine from euill . But it is required of Christians a to doe that which is good , as well as to abstaine from that which is euill . This is it which is commended in Iaakob : he did not only forbeare to take such a wife as would be a griefe to his parents ( wherein his b brother Esau had offended ) but also obeyed his parents in c taking such a wife as they willed him to take . This generall point we will exemplifie in foure particular instances , namely , in a childs obedience to his parents commandements , instructions , reproofes , corrections . §. 28. Of childrens obedience to their parents commandements . I. What lawfull commandements soeuer parents giue to their children , they must be ready to the vttermost of their power to obey . d Obey your parents , saith the Apostle to children . Parents , by vertue of their place , haue power and authoritie to command : Children therefore must obey , or else that power is to no purpose . To demonstrate this by some particulars : 1. If a parent call his childe , or send for him , he must readily come , yea though he know not the occasion . Eli was in place of a parent to Samuel , whereupon the childe supposing that Eli called him , b ranne to him once , and againe and againe . c Dauid when he was sent for by his father out of the field to be anointed King , knew not the occasion , yet came . d The twelue sonnes of Iaakob , though men growne , yet called for by their father , assembled themselues together before him . 2. If a parent be disposed to send his childe any whither , or of any errand , though it be farre off , and may seeme somewhat troublesome , yet he ought to goe , and doe it . The * forenamed example of e Iaakob , the example also of f Ioseph ( being sent to see whether it were well with his brethren ) and of the g tenne sonnes of Iaakob ( being sent by their father into Egypt , ) and of h Dauid ( sent to visit his brethren in the hoste ) are in this case commended by the holy Ghost . Of Dauid it is noted , that i he arose vp early and went as Ishai had commanded him : which setteth forth his ready obedience . 3. If a parent require his childe to attend vpon him , he must also doe that . When Abram was going vp to the top of Moriah his will was that his seruants should tarrie behinde , and that his sonne Isaak should attend him , and carry the wood for the sacrifice , and accordingly Isaak obeyed . 4. If a parent inioyne any taske , or commit any businesse to his childe , he ought faithfully to performe it . This kinde of faithfull obedience is commended in d Ioseph , in the e Rechabites , and in f Dauid , with many others . Ioseph , by reason of his great place , might not goe out of Egypt , yet to performe that which his father inioyned him , he asked leaue . The Rechabites were tempted to breake their fathers charge , yet they would not . Dauid when he was sent by his father , from the sheepe which were committed to his custodie , was carefull to leaue them with a keeper : and againe , when a Beare at one time , and a Lion at another came to the flocke , he put his life in hazard to preserue the flocke : all these circumstances are thus noted , to set forth the great care that these children had to discharge that charge which their parents had committed to them . §. 29. Of childrens disobedience to their parents commandements . Contrary is a rebellious disposition in children , manifested by these and such like practises , 1. By refusing to be at their parents call ; or comming ( as we speake ) at leisure , and making their parents wait for them . 2. By a lazie , sluggish pretending of vaine and friuolous excuses , when their parents would send them of an errand , like that sluggard , who saith , a A lion is without , I shall be slaine in the streets . Such pretences are as b vineger to the teeth , and smoke to the eyes . 3. By scorning to wait on their parents ; and in that respect they will slinke out of doores , and absent themselues , when they imagine their parents will vse their seruice in that kinde : they forsooth will not be their parents seruants : and impious conceit . 4. By refusing to doe what their parents inioyne them to doe , and require at their hands , like c the younger sonne , that went not to worke in the vineyard at his fathers command . Such children for the most part offend herein , as through pride thinke the businesse inioyned to them too meane , and base to doe . Had Dauid , or the daughters of Reguel beene of this minde , the one would not haue returned to his fathers sheepe , after he was anointed to be King ouer Israel , and after he had beene called to the Court ; and the other would not haue watered their fathers sheepe , especially among such rude and biosterous clownes , as without all respect to their place and sex , would driue them away . §. 30. Of childrens obedience to their parents instruction . II. Such wholsome instructions as parents giue their children for the well ordering of their cariage , children ought conscionably ●o obey : a point which a Solomon much presseth : My sonne , saith ●he , heare the instruction of thy father , and forsake not the law of thy another , &c. And to moue children the rather to doe so , he sets before them b his owne example , shewing that he required no more of them then himselfe had performed . c Moses , though growne to yeeres , and a prince among his people , testified his obedience to his father in law hereby . 1. Parents haue an expresse commandement to instruct their children ( as we shall * after shew . ) Great reason therefore that their children heare and obey them therein . The good instructions of any one are to be regarded , much more of parents . 2. Great wisdome may be attained thereby : for the desire that parents haue of their childrens good , maketh them giue the best directions they can vnto them , euen what themselues haue learned of others , or obserued by their owne experience : in this respect , Solomon stileth him d a wise sonne that obeyeth the instruction of his father : and resembleth the fruit and benefit thereof , to e acomely ornament , to chaines , and bracelets , and to a crowne of glory . 3. Much ioy and comfort is brought to parents by seeing their children obserue their instruction : for f a wise sonne maketh a●glad father . Now this is a thing which children ought to aime at , g to reioyce their parents heart . Esau is taxed for h grieuing his parents . Contrary is their proud and foolish humour , who thinke they need no instruction , their parents are too iealous of them , they are wise enough of themselues ; if their parents would but let them alone , they should doe better : thus they shew themselues impious against God , rebellious against their parents , and iniurious to themselues . Such were i Elies , and k Lots sonnes . Now note the vengeance that fell vpon them . §. 31. Of childrens patience to their parents reproofe . III. The obedience of children must further * extend it self to their parents reproofe : and that by patient bearing all manner of reproofes , and by amending what is iustly reproued . That shame , whereof the Lord speaketh , which should be in a childe , when her father hath spet in her face , that is , by some outward signe manifested his anger , implieth a childs patient bearing of a parents reproofe . This patience in a childe must be manifested to his parent , whether his reproofe be milde or bitter , iust or vniust . In this respect a childe must more consider the person who reproueth , then the matter or manner of the reproofe . Iaakobs reproofe of Ioseph , for his dreames which came of God , was vniust : the manner of vttering it , with many short pauses , and that interrogatiuely , implieth some tartnesse : yet such was his patience , as we read not of one discontented word that he gaue . But most memorable is the patience of Ionathan in this kinde . His father Sauls reproofe of him was directly vniust , and out of measure bitter : yet with what patience did he beare it ? all that he replied was to make some little apologie for Dauid : he replied nothing against his fathers opprobrious speeches . Great wisdome may be learned by this patience : for so may a childe better iudge of his parents reproofe , whether it be iust or no. Though it be vniust , yet thereby may he obserue what is displeasing to his parents : at least he may obserue his parents infirmitie , and so know the better how to carry himselfe towards them . Contrary is the practise of such children , as vpon euery reproofe of their parents are ready to * answer againe . Our parents are wayward , say they , who can beare them ? If none else could beare them , yet should children : for parents ordinarily beare such waywardnesse , and vntowardnesse at their childrens hands , especially while they are young , as none else would or could . Quest . If a parent be mistaken in a matter , and vniustly reproue his childe , may the childe make no answer ? Answ . Yes , he may , so he doe it mildly , reuerendly , and seasonably : not too peremptorily crossing or thwarting his parent . Obiect . Christ tooke vp his mother very roundly for reprouing him vniustly . Answ . Christ as God-man was greater then his mother , and in that respect with authoritie blamed her for her vniust reproofe . The Virgin Marie was not ignorant thereof , and therefore was silent . §. 32. Of childrens readinesse to amend what is iustly reproued by their parents . If a childe be iustly for his fault reproued by his parents , both conscience toward God , and obedience to his parent , requireth that he readily redresse that which is amisse . Vnlesse amendment of the thing iustly reproued be added to patient bearing of reproofe , that patience can be no better accounted of , then dissimulation , and plaine mockage . When the father in law of Moses told him , that what he did was not well , he forthwith amended it . But contrarily many lewd and vngracious children continue to goe on in their wicked courses , though their parents againe , and againe rebuke them for it . Iust was Elies reproofe of his children , but yet no amendment followed . Now note the inference made thereupon by the holy Ghost , They obeyed not the voice of their father , because the Lord would slay them : whereby is implied , that to despise the iust reproofe of parents is an euident signe , and forerunner of Gods heauy iudgement . Salomon calls the childe which will heare no rebuke , a Scorner , which noteth out a most obstinate sinner that cannot be reclaimed , and in that respect is scorned of the Lord. §. 33. Of Childrens submission to their parents correction . IIII. Correction is a reall reproofe , a reproofe in the highest degree , euen the seuerest kinde of reproofe : so as by subiection hereunto great tryall of obedience is made . By the same meanes must a childes submission to his parent in this kinde of reproofe be manifested , as in the former : namely , 1. By bearing patiently the correction which his parent shall giue him . 2. By amending readily that for which he is iustly corrected . The former of these is noted by the Apostle as a ruled case , a matter not to be denied , in these words , a We haue had fathers of our flesh which corrected vs , and we gaue them reuerence . One speciall part of this reuerence is a patient suffering : therefore he inferres thereupon , ought we not to be in subiection ? &c. The latter is set forth by Salomon vnder an effect which followeth vpon the performance thereof : for hauing aduised a parent to correct his childe , he addeth this reason , b He shall giue thee rest , yea he shall giue delight vnto thy soule : how can this rest , and delight be giuen , but by the childes amendment of that for which he is corrected ? A parent taketh no delight in the paine , and smart of his childe , but in the fruit that followeth thereupon . As a childes transgression is c a griefe , and vexation to the parent , so his amendment causeth rest and delight . Now this effect followeth not simply vpon correction , but vpon the good vse thereof which is made by the childe . It lyeth therefore in the childe , and so lyeth vpon him as a dutie , to giue this rest and delight to his parent by amending the fault for which he is corrected , as he brought griefe to him by prouoking him to vse correction . Thus shall neither parent repent the inflicting , nor the childe repent the induring of correction . That a childe may attaine to this degree of obedience , he must duly consider both the Cause whereby his parent is moued to correct him , and also the End which he aimeth at therein . The cause is the d loue he beareth to his childe . The end which he aimeth at , is his childes c good . If these motiues worke not obedience , what can ? §. 34. Of refusing , or abusing correction . Contrary is disdaine on the one side , and obstinacie on the other . Disdaine , when children scorne to be corrected by their parents : and in that respect when by all the meanes they can vse , they cannot auoid it , they will mutter and murmure , fret and fume , rage and raue against their parents , and despise and hate them for it . Obstinacie , when they will be no whit bettered thereby , but still runne on in their leaud courses , and rather waxe the worse for being corrected . This may be counted the highest pitch of a childes rebellion : for this is the last meanes which a parent can vse to reclaime his childe from desperate courses . If this preuaileth not , the law of God requireth , that a parent should giue vp his childe into the hand of the Magistrate , that he may be put to death . Hitherto of the distinct branches of childrens Obedience . The Extent thereof followeth . §. 35. Of childrens conforming their iudgements to their parents . The extent of childrens obedience is only implied in this Epistle to the Ephesians , but it is expressed ( Col. 3. 20 ) in these words , Children obey your parents a IN ALL THINGS . A large extent , but not simply to be taken without any limitation : for the Apostle himselfe noteth a restraint in these words , b In the Lord. So farre forth as children transgresse not any of Gods commandements in obeying their parents , they ought to obey . This is to obey in all things , in the Lord. * The extent of childrens duties being the very same that was of wiues duties : and the restraint also the same , that order which was there obserued shall here also be kept . Only other proofes more pertinent to childrens place , shall be brought to confirme those generall propositions which may be applied to any inferiours . Many generall reasons there alledged for proofe of the propositions shall here be omitted . Wherefore compare this place with that . Thus we see that parents authority is very large : there is no restraint of it but Gods contrary command , whereof a childe must be assured , if he refuse to obey his parent in any thing . It is not enough for a childe to say I haue thus long , and in thus many things obeyed my parent , I hope in some things if I haue mine owne will , I may be excused . No : All things comprise more then many things . Wherefore Many are not enough . And though Gods will be exempted , yet is not thine owne will exempted : though thou maiest doe nothing against Gods will , yet thou oughtest to doe many things against thine owne will , if it be contrary to thy parents . Two things are to be laboured after by children for attaining to this extent of obedience in all things . 1. They must labour to bring their iudgement and will to the bent of their parents : to thinke that meet and conuenient for them to doe which their parents will haue them doe . Though Isaak thought it somewhat strange that he should carry wood vp to an hill to offer sacrifice where was nothing for a burnt offering , yet it being the will of his father that he should doe so , he thought it meet enough for him to doe so . This subiection of iudgement and will is to be yeelded in all the particular cases of obedience which were * before propounded , as in their calling , mariage , apparrell , allowance , &c. So as children are to thinke that kinde of calling , that particular match , that apparrell , and that allowance to be meetest for them , which their parents thinke meete . If the iudgement be perswaded of the meetnesse of a thing , and the will inwardly brought to yeeld vnto it , outward obedience will more readily and cheerefully bee yeelded thereunto . Contrary is the ouerweining conceipt which many children haue of their owne iudgement and will , who thinke they can better discerne what is fit and meete for themselues , then their parents . They imagine their parents to be too strict and precise , or too suspicious and iealous , or too couetous and worldly . This maketh them take what callings , what matches , what apparrell , what allowance they thinke best ; whence many mischiefes arise , which would all easily be auoided , if they would lay downe that presumptuous conceit , and labour to obserue the forenamed direction . §. 36. Of childrens yeelding to practise at their parents command , such things as in their iudgements they cannot thinke very meet . 2. Though children cannot in their iudgements thinke that which their parents require to be the fittest and meetest , yet being pressed thereto by the peremptory command of their parents , in practise they ought to yeeld vnto it , saying to their parents as Peter to the Lord , Neuerthelesse at thy word I will doe this , Thus did a Iaakob yeeld to Rebekah : he thought by doing that which his mother bid him , he should seeme a ●●ocker to his father , yet she vrging him , he did it . Quest . May not a childe , yeelding better reason then his parent , refuse to doe what he thinketh vnmeet , or at least for●eare to doe what he is commanded , till he be better informed ●f the meetnesse thereof ? Answ . With reuerence and humility he may render his reason why he thinketh it not meete , and desire his parent not to vrge it vpon him . ( This did b Iudah one of the sonnes of Iaakob , and is not blamed for it : ) and parents ought in such a case to yeeld to their children ( as c Iaakob did . ) But yet if in things indifferent , parents be otherwise minded then their children , and will haue their children yeeld to them , they must yeeld . For , 1. In in different things the command of a parent is a warrant to the childe , by reason of this extent ( all things : ) so as the parent may sinne in commanding that , in doing whereof the childe may not sinne . Who can cleare Rebeckah of sinne in commanding Iaakob to deceiue his father ? yet I take it , that Iaakob cannot iustly be blamed for obeying . 2. Children doe thus manifest an high esteeme of their parents , and very great respect towards them : they shew how desirous they are to please them , and how fearefull to offend them . When the will of parent and childe consent , there is no such triall . 3. By this meanes peace and loue is better preserued betwixt parent and childe : a parents anger is stopped , the effects thereof auoided , and many other mischiefes preuented , which oft fall out when inferiours refuse to yeeld to their superiours who haue authority ouer them . Contrary is their preposterous peremptorines who will doe nothing against their own mind & will , though their parents require it neuer so much . This phrase ( f If thou wilt not send , we will not goe downe ) which Iudah vsed to his father , though in a good cause , was too peremptory for a childe . They who obstinately refuse to doe those things which are against their owne minde , must needs come short of this extent , Obey in all things . Yea they shew that what they doe is rather for their owne sakes because they like it , then for their parents sake . What obedience then may that be thought to be ? Yet this is all the obedience which many children will yeeld . If they thinke not that which their parents require to be meet , nor faire , nor foule meanes shall moue them to doe it ; whereby many children doe much prouoke their parents . Let such children know , that it is euery way more safe for them at the instant command of their parent to doe that which they conceiue to be vnmeet , then peremptorily to disobey their parents , which is more then vnmeet , euen vnlawfull . §. 37. Of the restraint of childrens obedience . The restraint of childrens obedience is expressed in this clause , in the Lord : which phrase affordeth a necessary limitation in obeying their parents , who are but parents of our flesh , men and women , subiect to erre in their commandements , and to require such sinfull things as their children may not with a good conscience performe . The limitation then which the forenamed clause ( in the Lord ) affordeth , is this , Children must performe no other obedience to their parents , then may stand with their obedience to God. The reasons rendred by the Apostle proue as much : This is right , this is well pleasing to the Lord. But to obey parents against the Lord is neither right nor wellpleasing to the Lord. If therefore parents command their children to doe any thing which the Lord hath forbidden them , they ought not to doe it . On this ground did Michal well in suffering her husband Dauid to escape out of the handes of Saul her father . I iustifie not her manner of carying the matter , with vntruths , and false tales ; but her refusing to yeeld to her fathers minde and will is iustifiable , and that in two respects . 1. In that the difference was betwixt her husband and father . Now e by Gods law a wife is to yeeld to her husband rather then to her father . 2. Because she knew her father sought to slay him : if then she had deliuered him into the hands of her father , she had made her selfe accessary to murder . In this latter respect Io●●athan also did well in refusing to fetch Dauid at his fathers command . Thus if a father command his childe to goe to Masse , to forsweare himselfe , to marry an Idolater , to steale , to lie , or to commit any other sinne forbidden by God , the childe ought not to obey : those things cannot be done in the Lord. Againe if parents forbid their children the doing of any necessary duty commanded of God , the childe ought to doe it notwithstanding the parents inhibition . We may well thinke that Ahaz who set himselfe so violently to deface the holy things of God , to prophane his ordinances , and to shut vp the doores of Gods House , gaue strait charge to his sonne that he should not repaire them againe ; yet Hezekiah so soone as he had power did repaire all . If a parent forbid his childe to goe to the Protestants Churches , to heare a Sermon , to pray in a knowne tongue , to giue iust weight , and measure , to speake the truth when he is called to witnesse it , with the like ; he must be of Daniels minde , and notwithstanding that prohibition , doe the things which God requireth . §. 38. Of childrens sinne in yeelding to their parents against God. Contrary to this limitation is on the one side a flattering eie-seruice in many children , who care not what they doe , be it good or euill , lawfull or vnlawfull , so they may please their parents thereby : and on the other side a slauish fearefulnesse , which maketh them so to dread their parents as they feare not God at all : they will rather choose to sinne and so prouoke Gods wrath , then doe any thing whereby their parents wrath may be prouoked . It is a brand set vpon euill kings that they a walked in the waies of their fathers , and mothers : and did wickedly b as they counselled them . Wherefore the following and obeying of their parents in euill was so farre from extenuating their sinne , as it did rather aggrauate the same . The preferring of father and mother before the Lord Christ sheweth that such a childe is c not worthy of Christ : In comparison of Christ d Father and mother must be hated . But that vndue and vnchristian-like respect of parents aboue Christ , is it that maketh so many young Papists , young swagerers , swearers , liars , deceitfull persons , and lewd liuers . For auoiding the two forenamed extremes let thine heart be filled with a true feare of God , and withall consider the difference betwixt our earthly parents and our heauenly Father . They are but parents e of our flesh , he is the Father of spirits . f They can but touch the body , he can cast body and soule into hell . They are but a while ouer vs , he for euer . Their authority is subordinate to his , his supreme & absolute of it selfe . They can giue but a light temporary reward ; he , an eternall weight of glorie . They cannot shelter vs from his wrath , he can from theirs . Hitherto of such duties of children as respect their parents authority , such as respect their necessity follow . §. 39. Of childrens Recompence . The generall head whereunto al the duties which children owe to their parents in regard of their Necessity , is in one word Recompence , which is a dutie whereby children indeauour as much as in them lieth , to repay what they can for their parents kindnesse , care , and cost towards them , and that in way of thankfulnesse ; which maketh a childe thinke he cannot doe too much for his parent , & well may he thinke so , for a parent doth much more for his childe before it is able to doe for it selfe , then the childe possibly can doe for the parent . So as if the parents authority were laid aside , yet the law of equity requireth this dutie of Recompence : so also doth the law of piety and charity . Wherefore of all other Duties this is most due . It is in expresse termes giuen in charge to children by the Apostle , who willeth them to learne to requite their parents . Contrary is neglect of parents in their need , which is more then monstrous ingratitude . As all ingratitude is odious to God and man , so this most of all , and yet very many are guilty thereof . In them the prouerbe is verified that loue is weighty . For it is the property of weighty things to fall downe apace , out to ascend slowly , and that not without some violence . Thus loue from the parent to the childe falleth downe apace , ●ut it hardly ascendeth from children to parents . In which respect another prouerbe saith , One father will better nourish nine children , then nine children one father . Many children in his kinde doe no more for their parents , then for strangers . They either consider not how much their parents haue done for them ; or else they conceit that what their parents did , was of meere dutie , and needeth no recompence . Fie vpon such barbarous and inhumane children ! §. 40. Of infirmities whereunto parents are subiect . The rule of the forenamed recompence is on the one side the parents Necessity , and on the other , the childes Ability . So as in euery thing wherein a parent needeth his childes helpe , the childe to his power must afford his best helpe . Beyond ones power nothing can be expected . A parents Necessity may be through Naturall infirmities . Casuall extremities .   Naturall infirmities are Inward . Outward .   Inward Infirmities are weakenesse of iudgement , slipperinesse of memory , violence of passion with the like ; whence proceed frowardnesse , testinesse , suspiciousnesse , iealousie , feare , griefe , &c. Outward Infirmities are such as arise from some instant temptation , as were a Noahs and b Lots drunkennesse ; b Lots and c Dauids vncleanesse ; d Abrahams and e Isaakes dissimulation ; f Iaakobs and g Dauids excessiue lamentation , &c. Some of these latter , which may seeme most heinous and odious sinnes , are then to be accounted infirmities , when they who commit them make not a sport of them , nor delight to liue and lie in them , as swine to wallow and lie in the mire : but only at some times , through some temptation , as it were vnawares , fall into them ; and after they are committed they are themselues more ashamed of them , and more grieued for them , then any other that see them , or heare of them . In regard of the naturall infirmities of parents , the dutie of children is both to beare with them , and also to couer them so farre as they can . §. 41. Of childrens bearing with their parents infirmities . Children beare with their parents infirmities when they doe not the lesse reuerendly esteeme their place , or person , nor performe the lesse dutie to them because of their infirmities . This is the first particular branch of recompence . For children in their yonger and weaker yeares are subiect to many infirmities : if parents had the lesse respected them for their infirmities , and from thence had taken occasion to neglect them , and would not haue borne with them , surely they could not haue beene so well brought vp . That great patience , long-sufferance , and much forbearance which parents haue shewed towards their children , requireth that children in way of recompence shew the like to their parents as occasion is offered . It was a great infirmity in Isaak to preferre Esau a prophane childe , before Iaakob a religious childe , especially against Gods expresse word concerning Iaakob ; yet Iaakob respected not his father a whit the lesse for it , as appeares by his a feare to offend him , and by his b readinesse to obey him . c Iaakobs vniust reproofe of Ioseph was no small infirmity , and yet how much Ioseph reuerenced and euery way respected his father the history following sheweth . Sauls infirmities were farre more and much greater then any of theirs , yet what dutie and faithfulnesse did Ionathan his sonne performe to him , euen to their deaths ? for d he died with him . We haue herein the patterne of Christ himselfe : how great infirmity did his mother bewray , when ouer-rashly she rebuked him being about a good worke , a bounden duty , his Fathers businesse ? yet immediatly thereupon it is noted that he went downe with his parents , and was subiect to them : which manifesteth the honour he gaue to his mother , notwithstanding her infirmitie . Contrary to this duty doe they , who take occasion from their parents infirmities to thinke basely of their person and their place , and thereupon grow carelesse in duty , either refusing to doe any duty at all , or else doing it carelesly , grudgingly , disdainefully , and scornefully . Absolom made a supposed infirmity of his father the ground of his rebellion . Had his pretence beene true , yet had it not beene a sufficient cause for him to disgrace , and rise against his father , as he did . The law that threatneth Gods vengeance against such children as mocke at their father , or despise to obey their mother , maketh no exception of parents infirmities . §. 42. Of childrens couering their parents infirmities . Children couer their parents infirmities both by passing by them ( as we speake ) and taking no notice of them , and also by concealing them from others as much as they can . The Scripture noteth it to be a property of loue to couer a multitude of sinnes : now in whom should loue abound , if not in children ? And who should more manifest this property of loue then children ? Of passing by and concealing from others a parents infirmity , we haue a worthy patterne in Shem and Iaphet : when Noah their father being drunken lay vncouered in the midst of his tent , they went backward ( that they might not themselues see their fathers infirmity ) and couered his nakednesse ( that others might not see it . ) The blessing which vpon this occasion was then promised to them and their posterity , sheweth how acceptable this dutie was to God. Contrary was Chams practise , who discouered , and made knowne his fathers nakednesse . The curse thereupon denounced against him , sheweth how odious that sinne was vnto God. Too many there be of Chams cursed brood , who blaze abroad their parents infirmities , and make such things knowne of them , as otherwise would not be knowne : whereby they bring much dishonour and shame vpon their parents ( which can be no honour to the children , ) and withall a curse from their parents on themselues , which the heathen accounted very dreadfull . More contrary was Absoloms practise , who raised a most malicious slander of his father , and thereby alienated his subiects hearts from him . Too many Absolom-like seeke to raise a supposed reputation and honour to themselues by vilifying and disgracing their parents : but let them note Absoloms end . Assuredly , if they hold on in that course , the like , or a worse , shall be their end . §. 43. Of childrens bearing with their parents casuall necessities . Casuall extremities , are all manner of crosses which by the prouidence of God are laid vpon a man : whether vpon his bodie , as blindnesse , lamenesse , sicknesse , &c. or on his person , as captiuitie , banishment , imprisonment , &c. or on his estate , as pouerrie , penurie , &c. In all these , children must beare with their parents , as in the forenamed infirmities ; neither lesse reuerendly esteeme of them , nor performe the lesse dutie because of them . These are such necessities , as are not sinfull in themselues ; and therefore in regard of these , parents are much more to be borne withall . Though Isaak were blinde , yet did not Iaakob a whit the lesse respect him . Though Naomi were poore , yet Ruth her daughter in law continued to doe a childs dutie and seruice vnto her . Contrary is the vnnaturall disposition of such children , as take occasion from these casuall necessities of their parents to despise them . God hath made an expresse law against despising those who are by any outward defects impotent , as deafe , blinde , &c. If no person may despise another , for these , much lesse children their parents . They are worse then Cham that doe so , and may looke for an heauier curse . §. 44. Of childrens releeuing their parents according to their neede . Besides bearing with parents necessities , in such cases as parents stand in need of their childrens releefe and succour , they must afford it them . In sicknesse they must visit them , as a Ioseph visited his father . In time of mourning , they must comfort them , as b the children of Iaakob . In want , they must prouide things needfull for them , as c the sonnes of Iaakob , who went vp to buy food for their father ; and as d Ioseph , who sent for Iaakob into Egypt , and there nourished him . It is noted of e Ruth , that shee did not only gleane for her mother a poore woman , but also reserued some of that food which was giuen to her selfe to eat , for her . In time of danger they must doe what they can for their protection and preseruation , as f Dauid had in this respect an especiall care of his father and mother . Yea , if God be pleased to take children out of this world before their parents , and their parents be succourlesse , they must take what order they can for the well-being of their parents after their owne departure , as g Christ , who commended his mother to his disciple Iohn a little before his death . These and such like duties are particular branches of recompence , and are all comprised vnder that h requitall , which the Apostle requireth of children : And they are but a small part of requitall of all the paines , care , and charges , that parents haue been at with their children . Yea , this only thing , that parents haue brought forth children into the world , can children neuer sufficiently requite . Nature hath taught thus much , not only vnto heathen men , but also vnto the vnreasonable creatures . Among other vnreasonable creatures , the example of the * Storke is worthy to be noted : for it is recorded of that kinde , that when the dammes are old , the young ones feed them ; and when through age , they are ready to faint in their flying , the young ones will helpe ; and when they are past flying , the young ones carrie them on their backs . The * Greeke name of a Storke is taken from that word , which signifieth , to requite a parents kindnesse : or else this word is taken from that name : they are both of the same notation . Contrary is the opinion of Pharisies , who thought that children by consecrating their substance to the Temple , might be freed from this dutie of recompence to parents , which is the mysterie of that Hebrew word i Corban . They made a meere pretext of piety to God , a cause of manifest impietie against parents . Christ giueth this verdict of them , that k they make the word of God of none effect . * Papists are of the same opinion , and so vnder the same censure . Contrary also is their practise , who hauing the goods of this world , suffer their parents to want . l S. Iohn saith , that the loue of God dwelleth not in him , who shutteth vp his compassion from his brother in that case ; how then can it dwell in such a childe ? Not they only who suffer their parents to starue , offend in this extreme , but they also who suffer them to liue poorely , and basely , when themselues m Diues-like fare delicately , and goe gorgeously attired euery day . In an higher degree doe they offend , who bring their parents to such extremities , as to pouertie by their lauish spending ; to prison by importuning them to be their sureties ; to excessiue griefe by their mischieuous practises , as n the sonnes of Iaakob . But what shall we say of such gracelesse children , as dare strike their parents ? o Gods law accounteth such a childe vnworthy of life , and adiudgeth him to death . Nay , what may be said of father-quellers , and mother-quellers ? There was of old no particular law made against them , because it is , supposed , that no childe can be so vnnaturall and inhumane . In imitation whereof p Solon , that wise law-maker among the heathen , made no law against them : and his reason being asked , he answered , that he thought no childe would commit such a fact . When afterwards such inhumane impietie was manifested in the world , the Ciuill Law ordained this punishment ; q If any shall kill his parent , let him not be put to the sword , nor fire , nor any other vsuall punishment : but let him be sowed in a sacke with a dog , and a cocke , and a viper , and an ape , and cast into the next sea , or riuer ; that while life is in him , he may begin to want all vse of the elements , and be depriued , while he liueth , of the aire , and when he is dead , of the earth . This sinne hauing beene committed among the heathen , the Apostle reckoneth it vp among other most notorious and barbarous sinnes , 1. Tim. 1. 9. As murther is one of those sinnes , which the earth can least beare , and which cryeth loudest to heauen for vengeance ; so among the seuerall kinds of murther , this is the most vnsupportable , and crying . Thus much of the duties of children , which they are to performe while their parents liue . It remaineth to speake of those which they are to performe when their parents are dead . §. 45. Of childrens care to burie their parents being dead . The duties which children owe to their parents after they are dead , concerne the Bodie of their deceased parēt . Credit     It is the dutie of children to bring the bodies of their parents deceased , with such decencie and honour , as may be answerable to the place and reputation wherein they liued . So as both the thing it selfe , and the manner of doing it , is to be obserued . The thing it selfe , namely Buriall of the corps of such as are deceased , hath euer beene in vse in Gods Church : and it hath beene vsed as a meanes to maintaine our hope of the resurrection of our bodies . Many of the heathen , who neuer dreamt of the resurrection , were wont to burne the dead bodies of their friends : other heathen learned this manner of buriall from the Church , though they knew not the mysterie thereof . It is more cleare then needs be proued , that Gods people , from the beginning of the world , haue performed this dutie of buriall to their friends ; but it is not pertinent to the point in hand , to insist vpon the generall : that it belongs especially to children to procure this dutie to be performed , is now the point to be proued , which is readily done by the approued examples of a Isaak , b Iaakob , c Ioseph , and others expresly recorded in Scripture . And great reason there is for it : for 1. It is a testimonie of great loue and good respect to the partie deceased . Now who should manifest more loue , and greater respect then a childe ? 2. It is a kinde of d blessing , promised by God to his Saints , to be buried : as on the other side , it is a f curse threatned against obstinate sinners , not to be buried . In this respect , g Dauid blesseth the men of Iabesh Gilead for burying Saul , and acknowledgeth it a kindnesse done to Saul . Now who ought rather to procure a blessing , and doe a kindnesse to parents , then children , who are oft blessed through their parents meanes ? 3. It being a great deformity to haue a mans corps lie aboue ground ( for no carkase will be more loathsome then a mans if it lie vnburied ) children , who are most bound to couer their parents deformity , are in this respect bound to burie their corps . Contrary is their practise whose mindes are so set on their parents goods , as they cleane neglect their bodies . So soone as their parents breath is out of their body , they so busie themselues about the things which they haue left behinde them , as their corps is ready to stinke before care be taken for the buriall of it . Yea , some will purposely keepe their parents corps aboue ground till they be exceeding noisome , for receiuing some reuenues , or debts , or other accounts , which must be paid before the corps be buried . If their corps must needes for sometime be kept aboue ground , let them be imbalmed , or so vsed as they may not sauour . They who are carelesse hereof , shew that they respect their parents wealth more then his person and honour . In which respect they also heinously transgresse , who are so greedy of their parents estate , as they must needs preuent his departure , and like Adoniah enter vpon their fathers estate , and take possession of his goods before breath is out of his body : whereby they doe oft cause great disquietnesse to him that would depart in peace . Againe , others bearing an inward grudge and secret hatred against a brother , or other kinsman , whom their parent intirely loued , and in that respect durst not meddle with him in their parents life-time , so soone , as their parent is dead , picke a quarrell with the party hated , and so disturbe and hinder their parents funerall . Such a plot Esau intended : but God defeated it , whereby it appeareth that God is displeased therewith . §. 46. Of the decency wherewith children ought to see their parents buried . The manner after which children ought to see their parents buried , must be with such decency as is agreeable to the commendable custome of the countrie and Church where their parents die , and with such honour as is in some measure answerable to the estate , and place of their parents while they liued ( at least if it be not aboue the meanes that the parent hath left , or aboue the abilitie of the childe that maketh the solemnitie . ) Ioseph was a great Gouernour in Egypt , by reason whereof his father when he came thither was highly accounted of : accordingly with great honour did he carry him to his graue . There are two extremes contrary to the forenamed decency ●nd honour . One is an ouerlauish and prodigall sumptuousnesse ●nd solemnitie at their parents funerall , farre aboue the estate , ●nd farre beyond the meanes which the parent hath left , and ●arre also aboue the estate and ability of the childe himselfe . ●ome by the needlesse solemnitie of their parents funerall are ●● farre cast into debt , as they are neuer able to recouer themselues againe , and so bring more dishonour to their parents by ●he weaknesse of their childes estate , then honour by the so●●mnitie of the funerall : there may be great honour , and much decency in a funerall , where is not extraordinary char●es : instance Steuens funerall . The other extreme is too base and priuate a manner of ●urying their parents , much vnbeseeming both their parents ●nd their owne estate , and means ; which ariseth from a mixture ●f pride , and couetousnesse possessing their hearts . Pride ma●eth them haue no solemnity at all , because couerousnesse will not suffer them to exceed in their solemnitie . Hence it commeth to passe that they chuse out strange places where neither their parents or selues are knowne , and the dead of the night that none may espie them ; and appoint an vncertaine time , that no friend may accompany them . God oft meeteth with such proud , couetous children in their kinde , and causeth them with like dishonour to be brought to their graues . §. 47. Of childrens paying their parents debts after their death . As children must haue respect to the body of their parents deceased , so also to their credit and name , which is a thing of greater account , and honour : a thing wherein they may bring a kinde of blessing to their parents and make them liue after their death . Parents themselues cannot doe any thing when they are dead to preserue the same : children therefore being the liuing Image of their parents must indeuour to doe it . Three things there be which children must make conscience of , euen in regard of their deceased parents credit , and reputation ; one , to pay their debts : another , to suppresse ill rumors : a third , to imitate their good example . I. If the estate of parents , their goods or lands come to their children , their dutie is to pay their debts , so farre as they can : especially if by law those debts may be recouered at their hands . For what law may force others to doe in equitie and Iustice , conscience must moue good children to doe in charitie , and recompence to their parents . The holy Ghost makes it a note of a wicked man to borrow and not to pay . Wherfore to wipe away that blot from the name of a parent deceased , children must be ready in this kinde to doe what the parent himselfe , if he were liuing , would , or should doe . Yea if children of themselues be well able , though their parents left not sufficient to pay all their debts , they ought to pay them . Herein especially a childlike affection is manifested to the parent . Contrary is their practise who striue to get all they can of their parents , and yet make no conscience of paying any debts at all , vnlesse law force them thereto . What they doe in this case cannot be thought to be done for their parents sake , but rather for their owne sake . Many so little respect their parents credit in this kinde , as they priuily conueigh away and vtterly conceale much of their parents estate , of purpose to defeate Creditors : which as it is a part of apparent iniustice , so it is a cause of opening the mouthes of men against their parents , to their discredit and shame . §. 48. Of childrens suppressing euill reports against their parents deceased . * The direction giuen before concerning childrens speech of their parents behinde their backs , may fitly be applied also to the care which children ought to haue of the speeches and reports which are made of their parents after their departure . It followeth as from the lesse to the greater , that what children doe for their parents credit in absence behinde their backes , they must much more doe when they are dead : for then there is no hope , no possibilitie that parents should doe any thing to right their owne wrong in that kinde : it lyeth therefore vpon children to doe it . Doe not they cleane contrary , who take occasion from the departure of their parents , both to open their eares to receiue any ill reports of them , and also to open their mouthes to speake ill of them : then blazing abroad all their infirmities , and stretching their ill reports of their parents beyond the lists of truth . Ill birds they are that so bewray their owne neast . They know that their parents being dead can haue no notice thereof : whereby they shew what little piety to God or parent is in their heart . But there is an euer-liuing , all-seeing , and all-knowing Father that taketh notice of all : who beside other ●engeance will cause such measure to be meated out to them , ●s they mete to their parents . There is no one thing wherein this prouerb , ( With what measure you mete it shall be measured ●o you againe ) is more often verified then in childrens ingra●itude to their parents . All ages haue giuen many instances thereof . ( The very heathen obserued it . ) Which sheweth Gods great indignation against it . §. 49. Of childrens imitating their parents good example . If parents haue beene persons of good carriage in their life time , as religious towards God , iust in their dealings with men , mercifull to such as stood in need of their helpe , doing much good in their place , and so ended their daies with much credit ; it is an especiall meanes to maintaine and continue this their credit , for children to walke in their steps , and to indeuour to be like them . Thus is a blessed memorie of their parents kept fresh and greene ( as we speake ) though their bodies be rotten . For when they who knew the parents behold the like good qualities and actions in their children , they will thereby be put in minde of the parties deceased , and say , Oh how such parents yet liue ! behold a liuely , and liuing Image of them . Thus did Salomon , Asa , Iehosaphat , Hezekiah , Iosiah and such like good Kings which came of the stocke and linage of Dauid , keepe the memory of their father Dauid , fresh , faire , and flourishing ( long after his body was rotten ) as is euident by these and such like phrases , He walked in the ordinances of Dauid his father : he walked in all the waies of Dauid his father : he did that which was right as Dauid his father , &c. There can be no better monument of a parents pietie , honestie , and vertue , then a childes liuely representation of the same . Wherefore as a motiue to stirre vp children to walke in the good waies of their parents , God hath promised to shew mercy to thousands of them that loue him and keepe his commandements , that is , such as hauing religious and righteous parents walke in their steps . Contrary are both those that are vnlike good parents , and those that are like euill parents . The former sort doe much impeach and dishonour the reputation of their parents , as Rehoboam , who by his foolish rigorous and vniust carriage , made the people speake contemptuously of Dauid . The latter sort continue in memorie the euill name , and the shame of their parents , and cause them to stinke more and more : as the sonnes and successors of Ieroboam , who following his idolatrous course , made it the more remembred , and caused this blur to remaine in his stile from age to age , Ieroboam which made Israel to sinne . As they stop the current , and hinder the passage of the blessing of righteous parents : so these propagate , and open a way for the curse of vnrighteous parents . §. 50. Of the superstitious dutie enioyned by Papists to children after their parents decease . To the two forenamed duties of burying the corps , and preseruing the credit of parents , Papists adde a third , and Heathen a fourth , whereof neither are warrantable by Gods word , but directly contrary thereto . That which Papists adde is , that children after their parents death ought to procure Diriges , Masses , Pardons , Releases , and such like toies for them , and make continuall prayers to free them out of Purgatory , and bring them to rest in heauen : of the vanity of these prayers , and folly of the other toies I haue * elsewhere spoken . The Scripture expresly teacheth that after death the soule goeth to the place appointed for it , of endlesse blisse or woe : so as there is no meanes of altering the one , or helping forward the other . §. 51. Of the vnlawfulnesse of childrens seeking to reuenge their parents wrongs . That which Heathen adde , is , that children after their parents death reuenge such wrongs as haue beene done to them in their life time . And they presse this so farre vpon children , as they affright them with their parents Ghost , saying , that if they neglect to reuenge their parents wrongs , their Ghost will follow them , and not suffer them to liue in quiet , but molest them continually . This conceipt ariseth from the corruption of nature , which is exceeding prone to reuenge : but it is expresly forbidden in Scripture , in these and such prohibitions , Resist not euill , b Recompence to no man euill for euill . c Auenge not our selues &c. Yet some in iustification thereof alledge d Da●ids charge to Salomon of taking vengeance on Ioab and She●●ei , after his death . Answ . The charge which Dauid gaue , & Salomons execution thereof , was no matter of priuate reuenge , but only a lawfull execution of iustice which children may and ought to doe . Iust reasons there were to moue Dauid to put off the execution of ●ustice vpon the one & the other so long . e Ioab was too mightie to haue execution done on him in Dauids time : and Shemeis offence was committed in the time of Dauids humiliation , which made him sweare that he would not himselfe take Vengeance of him . Besides , Salomon executed iustice on the one and the other , not for the wrongs they did to his father , but for other crimes which they committed in his time : onely their former offences were remembred to aggrauate the matter . Thus farrc of childrens duties . The manner of performing them followeth to be declared . §. 52. Of the manner of performing childrens duties . That clause which * noted out the limitation of childrens duties , affoordeth also an excellent direction for the manner of performing them . It is this , in the Lord : that is , Children must so performe their duty to their parents as they would or should performe it to the Lord. More particularly it implieth these six points : 1. That their duties be performed in conscience , or for conscience sake , which is all one as for the Lords sake : for the Lord onely is Iudge of the conscience and hath power ouer it . Thus must subiects performe duty to magistrates : much more children to parents . The reason which the Apostle rendereth in these words , This is wel-pleasing to the Lord , sheweth that children in obeying their parents must labour to approue themselues to God. 2. Their duties must be in sincerity , which is when children pretend in shew to doe no more , then in truth and heart they meane : Whatsoeuer ye doe , doe it heartily as to the Lord , saith the Apostle . Parents vse to deale with none more heartily then with their children : accordingly must children deale with parents . 3. They must be performed cheerefully , with a willing and ready minde : for the Lord loueth cheerefulnesse . Herein lyeth a maine difference betwixt a filiall and seruile , a childe like and slauelike obedience . 4. They must be performed reuerendly as to them which beare the Image of God. Hereof we spake * before . 5. They must so be performed , as in performing them no sinne be committed against God. Hereof also we spake * before . 6. Constancy must be added to all other vertues . For as the Lord himselfe is constant in all his waies and workes , so he expecteth that children should be in the duties which he requireth at their hands . He that beginneth well , and holdeth not on , loseth all the glory of his good beginning . If the examples of all good children commended in Scripture be well weighed , we shall finde their duties , so farre forth as they were acceptable to God , performed after the foresaid manner , in all the branches thereof . §. 53. Of the aberrations of children in the manner of their obedience . Contrary are these aberrations . 1. When children performe their duties on by-respects : for feare of parents wrath , and the punishment following thereon : for hope and expectation of greater portion and allow●nce : vpon instant perswasion of friends , with the like : these respects simply in themselues are not for the Lord. 2. When they performe them only outwardly in shew , complementally while parents are in presence , or may know thereof . This is not with respect to God who seareheth the ●eart . 3. When they performe them grudgingly , mutteringly , disdainfully : as if their parents authority were an vsurped ●ower and not giuen them of God. Is this in the Lord ? 4. When they performe them rudely and vnmannerly : his sheweth they consider not the glory of Gods Image shi●ing in their parents . 5. * When they care not how they sinne against God , so ●●ey may please their parents . 6. When , as if they repented of what they haue well done , ●●ey refuse to doe any more duty to their parents . They waxe ●eary , thinking that God hath laid too heauy a burden vpon ●●em . Many shew themselues more dutifull in their young●● then in their riper yeares . That which maketh children ●eary in doing duty , is commonly the great and long neede of ●●eir parents , as long sicknesse , long impotency , long pouerty , with the like . It appeares that such children looke only on their parents as men , which , as they imagine , can neuer recompence their paines and cost : they looke not to God who is able abundantly to recompence all . These therefore performe not their duty in the Lord. §. 54. Of the equall respect that children are to beare to both parents . As the distinct duties of children haue beene set forth , so I thinke it requisite to declare distinctly who the parties be to whom those duties are to be performed . These principally are the naturall parents , both Father and Mother . Secondarily such as are in the place of parents . The first point then to be noted is , that children beare an equall respect to both their naturall parents , and performe duty to both alike . The law expresly mentioneth both , Honour thy Father and thy Mother . Well may we thinke that there was some iust and vrgent cause , that the law which so briefly vnder as few words as well could be , compriseth exceeding much matter , should expresly mention father and mother , when as there is one word , parent , which includeth both . Now what other reason can be rendred then the point in hand ? It is worthy to be noted , how the Apostle contenteth not himselfe to haue named parents , which implieth both , but also annexeth the expresse words of the law , which in particular setteth downe , father and mother . It is expresly set downe of Iaakob that he obeyed his father and his mother . Among other pen-men of Scripture Salomon expresly mentioneth both father and mother , euen almost twenty seuerall times in Prou. Many reasons there be to inforce this point . 1. Both parents are vnder God a like meanes of their childrens being . Children come out of the substance of both alike . 2. The care and pains of both for the good of the children is very great : I know not of whether the greater . The mothers paines and care in bringing forth the childe is indeed the greater , and it may be also the greater in bringing vp the childe , especially while it is young , at least if she giue it sucke her selfe : yet afterwards the fathers exceedeth in prouiding fit calling , sufficient meanes of maintenance , yea and portion or inheritance for it , and that after he himselfe is dead . Thus one way or other the childe is equally bound to both : and accordingly Gods law maketh no difference betwixt them . Obiect . The wife is subiect to her husband : therefore a childe ought to preferre his father before his mother . Answ . Though there be a difference betwixt father and mother in relation of one to another , yet in relation to their children they are both as one , and haue a like authority ouer them . Now children are not to looke to that difference that is betwixt their parents in that mutuall relation that is betwixt husband and wife , but to that authority which both parents haue ouer their children : and so to carry an equall respect to both . 2. Obiect . What if the fathers and mothers disposition be contrary : and the one command what the other forbids . Answ . The thing commanded or forbidden must be obserued : if it be about a thing simply good or euill , lawfull , or vnlawfull , then the parent which would haue the thing lawfull to be done , or vnlawfull to be for borne ( though it be the mother ) must be obeyed : for in this case she is backt with Gods authority . But if the matter be meerely indifferent , then I doubt not but the father must be obeyed : yet so as the childe no way shew any contempt to his mother , but with all reuerence and humility make it knowne to her that it is best both for her-selfe and himselfe , that his father be obeyed . But if the fathers contrary authority be not interposed , or if the father be dead , then is a mother as simply and absolutely to be obeyed in all things , as a father . §. 55. Of pretences alledged to obey father rather then mother . Contrary on the one side is their childish fondnesse who so wholly respect their mother , and seeke to please her , as they little regard their father , vnlesse through feare they be forced thereto : and on the other side , their scornefull spirit who only beare respect to their father , and altogether neglect their mother , if not despise her . For the most part , of the two , the mother is lesse regarded . The reasons whereof I take to be these following , whereunto I will annex particular meanes to remoue the seeming force of those reasons , as antidotes or remedies vnto them . 1. The mother by reason of her sex is commonly the weaker , and subiect to more infirmities . Answ . Children ought rather to looke vpon their mothers place and authority , then their person and infirmitie : so these would no whit impaire their respect of the other . 2. The mother is more indulgent and tender to her children : and vseth more familiarity towards them : now familiarity breedeth contempt . Answ . This is the abuse of familiarity : loue should breed loue : and loue must be ordered according to the condition of the parties louing , and loued . As children with one eie behold the affection of the mother , so with another they should behold Gods image in the mother ; and then ( that which is * noted as the ground of all childrens dutie ) a louing-feare would be wrought in their heart , which would cast out all contempt . 3. The mother hath not that power to reward or reuenge that a father hath . Answ . 1. This is not to obey in the Lord. No outward respect should moue the childe to obey his parents so much as conscience to God-wards . If children duly considered God , how he hath made no difference , but commanded them to obey both alike , and how he is able abundantly to reward , and seuerely to reuenge , that reason would be no reason . 4. The mother is subiect to the father . Answ . This was remoued * before . As a generall answer to these and all other such pretences as can be alledged , let it be noted that the Lord doth not only in expresse termes charge children to feare their mother , but also ( the more to presse this point ) sometime setteth the mother in the first place , thus ; Yee shall feare euery man his mother , and his father : which is not so to be taken as if the mother of the two were the more excellent ( in this respect the father for the most part is first named ) but because it is the truest triall of a childes subiection to be subiect to his mother . He that willingly and conscionably subiecteth himselfe to her , who is in relation to her husband the inferiour , in sex the weaker , in condition subiect to more infirmities , in her affections lesse moderate , in power lesse able to reward , or to punish , will much rather ( no doubt ) subiect himselfe to his father . §. 56. Of the difference of childrens subiection to naturall parents , and to such as only are in the place of parents . Beside naturall parents , there are others by God so set ouer children , as they owe in conscience child-like dutie vnto them . These in generall are such as are in the place of parents , and so performe , or at least ought to performe , the dutie of parents to children . They are of two sorts . 1. Such as are ioyned to a naturall parent in mariage , commonly called Step-fathers , and step-mothers , or fathers in law , and mothers in law . 2. Such as haue the gouernment and tuition of children committed to them , commonly called Guardians , Tutors , Gouernours : yea also foster-fathers , and foster-mothers . Quest . Is the same dutie in euery respect due to those who are in place of parents , as to naturall parents themselues ? Answ . Not so . There is such a prerogatiue appertaining to naturall parents from whom children haue receiued their being , that many things wherein children by an absolute necessity are bound to them , are bound vnto the other who are but in place of parents , only by the law of honesty , of meetnesse & conueniency . Whence it commeth to passe that such things as being done by children rebelliously without , or against the consent of naturall parents proue meere nullities , will stand in force though they be done without or against the consent of such as are only in the place of parents : instance contracts made about goods , lands and such other things as parents retaine a right in : whereunto many good Diuines adde * contracts of mariage , of calling and the like . Yet notwithstanding seeing in conscience we are bound to those things which the law of honesty , and conueniency requirety ( for whatsoeuer things are honest , iust , and of good report , are to be done ) great is that dutie which children owe to those who are in place of parents . §. 57. Of childrens subiection to fathers and mothers in law . Fathers and mothers in law are to be ranked in the first degree of those who are in the place of naturall parents . Very good proofe there is in Scripture for childrens subiection to them . The respect which Moses beare to his father in law , and Ruth to her mother in law , and Christ himselfe to his supposed father , are commended for this very purpose . Subiection is noted in Christs example : Reuerence in Moses : Recompence in Ruths . The mariage bond maketh man and wife one flesh : whereupon the naturall parent that marieth another , maketh that other one with him , and in that respect is as a parent to the children , and by them ought to be accounted so . The law of God maketh it plaine in●●st for a sonne to vncouer the shame of his mother in law , or for a father in law to vncouer the shame of his daughter in law . Whereby it appeareth that fathers and mothers in law , are by Gods law in the very place and steed of naturall parents to their children , and accordingly as naturall parents are to be honoured . Besides it is a great honour which a childe doth to his naturall father or mother to respect such as they haue made one flesh with themselues , as they doe their owne parent . So as to honour a father , or mother in law , is to honour a naturall parent . Contrary is the minde and cariage of most children . Very few beare a reuerend , dutifull , and child-like respect to stepfathers , and step-mothers : but for the most part despise them in heart , grumble at them in speech , and are very vndutifull in their behauiour : whence it commeth to passe that they bring much griefe to their naturall parent , and oft cause much discord and dissention betwixt their naturall , and step-parent● being herein set on worke by Satan , who laboureth what he can to disunite those whom God hath neerely vnited together and made one flesh . Lamentable experience sheweth that the second , third , or any after-mariages are seldome so comfortable and peaceable as the first : especially if either the one , or other , or both haue children . The cause thereof , for the most part , is in children , who brooke not fathers or mothers in law . Obiect . Nature cannot so well brooke a step-parent , as a naturall parent . Answ . 1. If not so well , yet despise them not : there is a difference betwixt extremes . 2. Conscience and religion ought to alter corrupt nature . Looke to Gods ordinance : and let Gods feare possesse thine heart , that that may bring thee to doe what nature cannot . 2. Obiect . Fathers and Mothers in law seldome respect their husbands or wiues former children . Answ . This obiection more beseemeth the mouth of a barbarian then a Christian . The Gospell teacheth to be subiect not only to the good and gentle , but also to the froward : and not to be ouercome of euill , but to ouercome euill with goodnesse . The Scripture reckoneth such as rise vp against their parents in law , among such as rise vp against their naturall parents : shewing thereby that the impietie of those , is as blame-worthy , as the impietie of these . §. 58. Of childrens subiection to Guardians , Tutors , &c. For childrens subiection to Gouernours , Guardians , and Tutors , the Apostle saith that a childe is vnder them . If by the law children are vnder them , they ought in equitie to be subiect to them . It is expresly noted of Esther , euen after the King had chosen her for his wife , that she did the commandement of Mordecai ( who was as a Guardian to her ) like as when she was brought vp with him . A memorable patterne for this purpose . What pretences might she haue made to haue cast off all manner of subiection ? Mordecai was but her cosen : she was now aduanced aboue him : a wife she was , and so subiect to her husband : yea a Kings wife , and so her selfe a Queene : yet she was subiect , and her subiection commended . We reade that the children of the Prophets much respected Elisha , did reuerence to him , and were obedient to him , because he was as a father and tutor vnto them : in which respect also Elisha was as a childe subiect to Eliah , whom he called father . Guardians , Tutors , and such like ouer-seers of children , haue a parents charge laid vpon them , as we shall * after shew : great reason therefore that child-like dutie should be yeelded to them . Their honour must be answerable to their charge and care . Contrary is the conceit of many lawlesse children , whose parents being dead , or they being sent and placed abroad out of the gouernment of their parents , thinke they are cleane free from all gouernment , and may liue as they list . Their practise being correspondent to this opinion , they runne into all riot , and in time bring themselues to vtter ruine . It is the ouerthrow of many children , that they regard not their Guardians , Tutors , and Gouernours : and God in iudgement bringeth many such refractarie children to some fearefull & shamefull end or other . Let children therefore be wise , and not take too much libertie to themselues . Thus farre haue beene handled the duties of children in their seuerall kindes , the manner of performing them , and the parties to whom they are to be performed . It remaineth to speake of the reasons which the Apostle alledgeth to inforce those duties . §. 59. Of the place of parents , whereby children ought to be moued to obey them . The reasons which the Apostle vseth to moue children to performe their dutie are foure : The first is taken from the place of the parent . The second from the equitie of the thing . The third from Gods expresse charge . The fourth from Gods promise . I. The place of a parent is noted forth by this phrase , IN THE LORD : which as it affordeth a * limitation , and giueth a * direction to children , so it addeth a spur vnto them , to stirre them vp to performe their dutie : for it sheweth that parents are to then children in the Lords steed : as an euidence thereof hath God communicated to them this glorious and honourable title ( FATHER ) which is * proper and peculiar to himselfe . Now then parents being to their children in Gods steed , and by vertue of their place bearing Gods image , children in obeying their parents , obey God ; in refusing to obey them , refuse to obey God. A strong motiue is this first motiue . For who is so void of religion , but will thinke it most meet , that God should be honoured ? or who so impious , as to refuse to yeeld dutie to God ? Here then children may learne in one maine point how to honour the Lord , & shew themselues children of God. And let them here by know , that disobedient and vndutifull children , that resist the authoritie of parents , resist the ordinance of God , and receiue to themselues damnation . §. 60. Of the equitie whereby children should be moued to obey their parents . II. The second reason in these words , for this is right , though it be not of greater force , yet is it more plainly and expresly noted to be a reason , as the causall particle ( for ) prefixed before it , sheweth . It is a generall reason drawne from common equitie ; a reason which may moue all sorts , euen Infidels and Pagans : therefore much more Christians . In saying , It is right , he implieth three things . 1. That it is agreeable to all law . To the law of God , which is the fountaine of equitie . To the law of Nature , which proceeds from thence . And to the law of Nations , which is answerable in many respects . The forenamed proofes out of Gods word , shew it to be agreeable to Gods law . The precepts which heathen men haue giuen of this point , shew it to be agreeable to the law of nature . And the many Constitutions of Law-makers , in all ages , shew it to be agreeable to the law of nations . 2. That the place of parents requireth as much . For RIGHT requireth that euery one haue his owne , that which is his due . It being therefore right , that children obey their parents , that dutie ●s due to them . 3. That parents deserue as much : for right presupposeth de●ert . That which is done of right , is done by way of recompence . The cause of this desert , is the loue which parents beare to children , the paine , paines , care , and cost they haue beene at , in bringing them forth , and bringing them vp . These things being implied vnder right , note what followeth ●rom the force of this reason , 1. Disobedient and vndutifull children , transgresse against Gods law , against common equitie of all nations , and against light ●f nature : so as they are vnworthy of the name of Christians , ●hey are worse then Infidels , yea worse then the brute beasts . 2. They haue no respect to the place of their parents , they disgrace the image of God , which their parents by vertue of their place carrie , and they disturbe that comely order and degree , which God hath set among men . 3. They ill repay their parents care and paines for their good , and shew themselues both vngratefull and vnnaturall : which are two most monstrous and odious sinnes . §. 61. Of Gods accepting childrens obedience . The forenamed reason is by this same Apostle in another place thus set downe , This is well-pleasing to the Lord. By comparing that place with my text , I obserue , that What is right is well-pleasing to the Lord. And againe , What is well-pleasing to the Lord is right . These two propositions , are ( as we speake in Schooles ) conuertible and reciprocall ; either of them true of the other euery way . Wherefore the Apostle , in another place , ioyneth them both together . For hauing exhorted children to recompence their parents , he saith , That is good and acceptable before God. b Good or honest is in effect the same that c right . This sheweth , that dutifull children , as they doe that which is good , or honest , and right vnto their parents ; so also therein they highly please God : so as they may be sure not to lose thereby . At Gods hand they shall receiue a reward , though their parents should little regard their dutifulnesse . Thus God dealt with Iaakob . His father in law ill repaid his faithfulnesse : but God looked vpon him , and abundantly recompenced all his paines . This sheweth againe , that vndutifull children , as they doe not that which is right , but rather wrong vnto their parents ; so they highly displease God : they may be sure therefore not to escape vnpunished , though their parents , through ouer-much indulgencie , should let them alone : instance the two impious children of Elie , Hophni and Phinehas : and the two rebellious children of Dauid , Absolom , and Adoniah . This therefore addeth force to the second reason , and moueth children to doe right to their parents , by obeying them , as they respect God , his good pleasure , or displeasure : as they looke for recompence , or feare vengeance from him . §. 62. Of Gods charge , how inuiolable a bond it is to tie children to obey their parents . III. The third drawne from Gods charge is not only in expresse termes noted , but for more weight the very words of the morall law are quoted ( Honour thy father and thy mother : ) and it is added , that this is a commandement , yea the first commandement , and that with promise , all which is for amplification of the point . Here then consider we 1. The reason it selfe . 2. The amplification thereof .   From the reason that it is Gods charge , I gather these three points . 1. That it is no arbitrary matter left to childrens discretion whether they will obey their parents or no : but a matter whereunto in conscience they are bound , euen as they owe alleageance to God himselfe the great law-giuer : so as in neglecting dutie to parents , children sinne euen against God himselfe : for the same God who hath commanded vs to honour himselfe , hath commanded vs to honour father and mother . 2. That this is a perpetuall and a generall law : a law whereunto all children of all times , places , sexes , estates and degrees alwaies haue beene , still are , and euer shall be bound . For the morall law is of that extent : it is generall for all persons : perpetuall for all times . Therefore no children may thinke to be exempted from it . Quest . What if children be growne to yeeres , and not vnder their parents gouernment ? Answ . There may be some difference both in some parts of subiection , and also in the manner of subiection betwixt such children as remaine vnder their parents gouernment , and such as are freed from it : but yet so long as a childe hath a parent , of what age or estate so euer he be , he oweth an honour vnto his parent . a Ioseph when he was a great Gouernour of Egypt , a man growne , hauing wife and children , yet performed the honour of reuerence , obedience , and recompence vnto his father . b Salomon when he was in an higher place then Ioseph , euen an absolute King , did the honour of Reuerence to his mother . 3. That no man can giue children any dispensation , or ex emption from their dutie to parents . If any may , he must be either the law-maker himselfe , or one greater then he , one that hath power ouer him . Now God is the author and giuer of that law , God spake all these words , &c. But is any greater then God ? hath any power ouer him ? Who then can dispence with children in this kinde ? Hence then I inferre these two conclusions . 1. That the Popes dispensation is nothing worth : they who make it to be of force , must make him greater then God , which is a horrible blasphemy . 2. Though parents themselues should not exact dutie of their children , yet children were bound to performe dutie to them , because of Gods charge . To this therefore are children to looke . This sheweth that there is no lesse paine hanging ouer the heads of the transgressors of this charge , then the curse of the law , eternall condemnation . §. 63. Of the title FIRST giuen to the fift commandement . In the amplification of the forenamed reason , the Apostle stileth the commandement of honouring parents the first with promise , as to shew that it is the first which hath a particular promise annexed to it ; so it is the first that God gaue of any dutie to be performed vnto man. The very order of the decalogue manifesteth the truth hereof . The reason is cleere : Honour due to parents is the ground of all the duties required in the second table : for if dutie be not performed to such as we are bound vnto by some peculiar bond , may we thinke that it will be performed to such as we are bound vnto at large ? Now of all to whom we are first and most bound , and to whom we owe our first dutie , our parents are the persons . They therefore who are rebellious against their parents , and refuse to doe their dutie to them , will hardly performe dutie to any other . Little hope that a disobedient childe will proue a profitable member in Church or common-wealth . Absolom , who was a rebellious childe , proued but a traiterous subiect : and Hoph●● and Phineas that refused to hearken to the voice of their father , proued but sacrilegious Priests . Wherefore if any precept of the second table be conscionably to be obserued ( as all are , for the same law-maker gaue all , and Christ hath said that the second table is like the first ) then is this of honouring father and mother , among the rest , and aboue the rest to be obserued , at least if difference of obseruing any may be made , But this particle ( first ) being set downe , not simply but with a connexion of promise with it ( The first with promise ) we are duly to consider the promise thereof : whence a fourth reason ariseth . §. 64. Of Gods promise mouing children to obey their parents . The fourth reason taken from Gods promise , is both generally propounded and particularly exemplified . Propounded in this clause ( first with promise . ) Exemplified in the third verse . For the Generall . Gods promise made to the performance of any duty , cannot but be a strong motiue to stirre vs vp to performe it . Men hereby doe stirre vp , and prouoke one another to performe any thing . Thus Kings when they would faine haue their subiects doe this or that , promise such and such rewards vnto them : Thus masters incite their seruants , parents their children , and one man another . If the promises of men incourage vs to performe the things which they giue vs in charge , how much more ought the promise of God ? Men ●re deceitfull , and may deale doubly , pretending one thing with their mouthes , and intending another with their heart , ●nd neuer meane to performe what they promise : But God is faithfull and true : his words are as deeds : his promises as performances ; so as he neuer maketh shew of more then he means ●o performe . Againe , mans power is limited ; though he truly ●●tend what he promiseth , yet in the performance he may faile ●ither in that he knew not his owne power , but thought when ●e made the promise he could haue done more then in the e●ent he findeth he can doe ; or in that he is after wards by some occasion hindered , or disabled . But Gods power cannot be so ●aitned , or hindered . Besides , men may be taken away before ●etime of performing their promise is come : but God euer ●●eth , and changeth not . If then mans promises be any moues to any thing , much more Gods who euer remaineth the ●me . Betwixt God and man there is no proportion , no com●rison . This motiue doth exceedingly commend Gods fatherly indulgencie towards vs , and the earnest desire he hath of our good . For he hath such power and authoritie ouer all his creatures , that the very knowledge of his will ought to prouoke them to performe any dutie which he shall command : and if they obey not , he might presently execute vengeance vpon them . But considering that we are his children , and need many allurements to draw vs on by little and little , he accordingly dealeth with vs. He standeth not wholly and only vpon his authoritie , but addeth promises thereto : ( for this is a commandement with promise . ) If notwithstanding all this , children refuse to obey their parents , may not the Lord iustly expostulate the matter with them , as sometimes in another case he did with the Israelites , and say , Iudge betweene me and these children : what could I haue done more that I haue not done ? I gaue them an expresse charge to honour their parents : I laid it downe in the first place as a maine and principall charge : to incourage them to keepe it , I added a promise of good to redound to themselues : what could I doe more ? Doe not they iustly deserue vengeance that regard none of these ? Thus , in that this is a commandement with promise , we see how children disobedient to their parents are both rebellious against God in regard of the commandement which they transgresse , and iniurious to themselues in regard of the promise which they make to be void and of no effect . Of this particular promise see more in the first treatise , § . 97 , 98 , &c. The sixth Treatise . The Duties of Parents . §. 1. Of the heads of Parents duties . EPHES. 6. 4. And ye Fathers prouoke not your children to wrath , but bring them vp in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. NExt to childrens , follow Parents duties , which the Apostle layeth down in this fourth verse : where he noteth , 1. The duties 2. The parties 1. That are to performe the duties , Fathers . 2. To whom they are to be performed , Children . The duties are set downe , 1. By prohibition . 2. By precept .   The prohibition noteth out one extreme , which is ouermuch rigour , ( Prouoke not to wrath ) The inference of the precept vpon the prohibition noteth out another extreme , which is ouer-much-remisnesse . The precept it selfe enioyneth to parents three duties . 1. To nourish children , namely with food , apparrell , and other like necessaries ( Nourish them . ) 2. To nurture them , namely with good discipline ( In nurture . ) 3. To instruct them , namely in the waies of God ( And admonition of the Lord. ) Nature teacheth Vnreasonable Creatures to doe the First Ciuility Reasonable Men   Second   Piety Christians   Third .   To these heads may all the seuerall points which I shall deliuer concerning parents duties , be referred . That Parents may the better discerne how one dutie followeth another , I will proceed in this order . 1. The fountaine of all duties , shall be declared . 2. The streames that issue thence ,   The streames shall be diuided into two riuers . In the first are those generall duties that are continually to be done . In the second , such particular duties as are to be applied to the seuerall ages of children . There are two principall generall duties . 1. Faithfull prayer to God. 2. Vpright walking with God. All the particulars may be comprised vnder this one head , A prouident care . And this hath respect , 1. To the Infancy of children , 2. To their Youth , 3. To the time of their placing forth , 4. To the time of parents departing out of this world . §. 2. Of that Loue which parents owe to their children . The Fountaine of parents duties is Loue. a This is expresly enioyned to them . Many approued examples are recorded hereof : as b Abrahams , c Isaacks , d Rebekahs , and others . Great reason there is why this affection should be fast fixed in the heart of parents towards their children . For great is that paine , paines , cost , and care , which parents must vndergoe for their children . But if loue be in them , no paine , paines , cost , or care , will seeme too much . Herein appeareth the wise prouidence of God , who by nature hath so fast fixed loue in the hearts of parents , as if there be any in whom it aboundeth not , he is counted vnnaturall . If loue did not abound in parents , many children would be neglected and lost . For if parents look not to their children , who will ? If none looke to them , they must needs perish : for they are not able to helpe themselues . As God by nature hath planted loue in all parents , so Christians ought euen for conscience sake , to nourish , increase , and blow vp this fire of loue , that they may thereby be made more forward to doe euery duty with cheerefulnesse . The more feruent loue is , the more readily will euery duty be performed . Obiect . As too much fire is dangerous , so too much loue . Answ . True. Wherefore as in other things , so in this , the golden meane must be kept . No dutie so holy and necessarie , ●ut may be peruerted . Let the extremes be auoided , and the meane will better be kept . §. 3. Of the contraries to loue . The extreme contrary to loue in the defect is want of naturall affection , which is reckoned in the a catalogue of notorious ●●nnes . Though loue of children be by nature engrauen in mans heart , yet many cleane put it out through couetousnesse , ●●st , vaine-glory , superstition , idolatry , and other vices : whereby it commeth to passe that in stead of the good which they ●ould doe for their children , they bring much mischiefe vpon ●hem . Some spare not the pretious life of their children . Among these , barbarous idolaters doe most exceed in this kinde of vnnaturall cruelty , sacrificing their children , and offering them vp to deuils . To this the great bloud-sucker Satan of old brought not only the heathen , who being ignorant of God did seruice to the diuell , but also the b Israelites to whom Iehouah the true God made himselfe knowne , and expresly c forbid this cruelty , and that d vnder paine of death . Behold how superstition and idolatry blinde the eies of men . * They who haue beene among the Sauadges in Virginea , Florida , India , and other like places testifie that such cruelty is vsed to this day . And it is rendred as a maine reason why , notwithstanding such spacious places as they haue , they increase no more in multitude , because many of their children from time to time are offered vp in sacrifice . Reasonable men herein shew themselues more vnreasonable then vnreasonable beasts , which doe what possibly they can to preserue their young ones . Though not so high , yet too high on this ladder of vnnaturalnesse doe they climbe , who hate their children , and that ( which maketh the sin to be out of measure sinful ) for piety and integrity ; as many Popish and profane parents , who haue children truly religious : and in that respect ought so much the more to be loued . The extreme in the excesse is too much doting vpon children : as they doe who so vnmeasurably loue them , as they make reckoning of nothing in comparison of children . Euen God himselfe is lightly esteemed , his worship neglected , his word transgressed , all dutie to others omitted , their owne soules forgotten thorow care of children . Is not this mee●● apish kindnesse ? for Apes kill their young ones with hugging . This is no loue , but plaine dotage . But what may be said of those that are so hellishly enamoured with their children as to commit incest or buggery with them ? §. 4. Of Parents praying for their children . The first and best streame which issueth out of the forenamed fountaine of loue is faithfull and feruent prayer . This extendeth it selfe to all things , at all times , thorowout the whole course of the childes life . It is the first and it is the last dutie which parents ought to performe to their children : euen that which they must doe without intermission ; Pray without ceasing . Though praier be a generall dutie which all Christians owe one to another , yet after a peculiar manner doth it appertaine to parents : and of all others they are most bound to it . For the promise which God maketh to a parent is extended to his seed and children , as these and such like Scriptures shew , b I will be thy God , and the God of thy seed : c That it may be well with them and with their children : d The promise is vnto you , and vnto your children . Parents therefore with most assurance of faith may call vpon God for their children . For Gods promise is the ground of faith : so farre as Gods promise is extended , so farre our faith may and ought to extend it selfe . Hence hath arisen the commendable custome of childrens asking their parents blessing : which intimateth a desire that parents would pray for Gods blessing on them . This dutie of praier must be performed before parents haue children ( that they may haue some , as e Isaak , f Annah and others did e ) and so soone as children are conceiued , especially if they obserue them to be quicke in the wombe ( as g Rebekah did ) and againe when they are borne ( as h Zachariah did ) and thorowout the whole course of their life ( as i Iob did ) and when they are going out of this world , and leauing their children ( as k Isaak did . ) There is no one thing wherein and whereby parents may doe more good for their children , then in and by true praier . God hath sanctified praier as a meanes to receiue all needfull blessing from himselfe the fountaine of all blessing . If therefore Gods blessing be of vse to children ( what Atheists are they that beleeue it not ? ) then also is praier by which it is obtained . §. 5. Of vices contrary to parents praying for their children . The very neglect of this dutie is a sinne contrary to the dutie it selfe : and many parents there be that stand guilty of this sinne . Some thinke it needlesse to pray for a childe before it be borne , not considering that in sinne it is conceiued . When it is borne they referre this dutie to the midwife , whereas it properly appertaineth to the father . After it is growne to any ripenesse , they put it off to the childe to pray for it selfe . And when they are on their death-bed , they thinke it enough if they can pray for their owne soules . Such parents shew little true loue to their children : but lesse faith in God. But what may we say or thinke of such impious parents as feare not to make fearefull imprecations against their children ? God oft in wrath and vengeance heareth such imprecations to the woe of parent and childe : whereby he sheweth his great indignation against them for the same . §. 6. Of parents endeauouring to be righteous that they may leaue Gods blessing to their children . Another generall branch proceeding from parents loue to their children , is , that for their childrens sake they endeauour to walke vprightly before God , and to please him . This I doe the rather note , because I finde the reward promised to righteous parents to be extended vnto their children a The generation of the righteous shall be blessed , saith Dauid . And Salomon , b Blessed shall his children be after him : and againe , c The good man shall giue inheritance vnto his childrens children . d This motiue is therefore vrged by the holy Ghost to prouoke parents vnto all righteousnesse . Thus doth the Lord extend the reward of righteous parents vnto their children to shew his great good liking , and high approbation of righteousnesse . Reade for this purpose , 1 King. 11. 34. & 2 King. 10. 30. 1. Obiect . e The righteousnesse of the righteous shall be vpon himselfe . Answ . That is meant rather of a mans personall righteousnesse , and grace it selfe which is not communicated to children , then of the fruit thereof : That faith in Christ , feare of God , obedience to Gods word , or any other personall grace which is in righteous parents , shall not iustifie or saue their children . For the iust shall liue by his owne faith . Yet this hindereth not but that the benefit and blessing of righteous parents may fall vpon their children according to the extent of Gods promise . 2. Obiect . By experience we finde it verified , that the children of some righteous parents are cursed : and the Scripture giueth vs many examples thereof : as g Cain , h Cham , i Absolom , and others like them . 1. Answ . Such children by their vnworthy , and degenerat cariage make forfeiture of Gods couenant and k so depriue themselues of the benefit thereof . 2. Answ . Many good reasons may be giuen why God should sometimes alter his course , and with-hold his blessings from the children of his seruants . As 1. Lest Gods gifts and blessings should otherwise seeme to come rather by naturall propagation from the parent , then by free donation from God. 2. Lest parents should thereby be drawne to neglect the meanes of good education . 3. Lest children also themselues , trusting too much to their parents righteousnesse , should take too much liberty , and waxe licentious . 4. Lest Gods free election should seeme hereby to be restrained . 3. Obiect . If this be so , what motiue can it be vnto parents to labour after righteousnesse for their childrens sake ? Answ . Though God doe reserue in himselfe a freedome to order his blessings as it pleaseth him , and to bestow them vpon whom he will : and thereupon sometimes blesseth the childe of a wicked parent ( instance l Hezekiah ) & denieth his blessing to the childe of a righteous parent ( instance m Ammon ) yet in that it is a very vsuall course with him to extend his blessing ( according to his promise ) to the children of the righteous , it is a strong motiue to such as desire the good of their children , the rather for their childrens sake to endeauour after righteousnesse : for thus doe they vse the meanes which by Gods word is warranted and sanctified for procuring Gods blessing to their children . Leaue therefore a good memory to thy children rather then much wealth . §. 7. Of the preposterous course which couetous and vniust parents take for the good of their children . Contrary is the course of such parents as by vnrighteous meanes thinke to prouide well for their children . For many doe not only too carkingly , and distrustfully moile and toile to scrape together great masses of money , or great store of land , or other stockes for their children , neglecting duties of piety and mercy , but also by vniust and wrongfull courses defraud others to make their children rich . So common is this vndue course of prouiding for children , as thence hath arisen this prouerbe , Happy are those children whose parents goe to the deuill . A cursed prouerbe . For what other thing can it intend , but this , that they who feare not God , nor take care for their owne saulation , will haue most respect to the outward estate of their children , and be most carefull to make them great , and rich in this world ? Wherein note how many waies they bewray their notorious folly . 1. They preferre the outward estate of their children before the eternall saluation of their owne soules . Yea and before God himselfe . 2. They place the happinesse of their children in the goods of this world ; a then which nothing more vaine . 3. They make themselues drudges to their children , and so debase themselues below that dignity which by reason of Gods image on them , appertaineth to them . 4. They with much paines , care , griefe , and feare are long gathering that which their children in short time most riotously and prodigally will lauish out . 5. They make themselues vassals to Satan and seeke by him to be made rich : whereas indeed b it is the blessing of God that maketh rich . Thus they take a wrong course to get wealth . If it be said that many are thus made rich , I answer , that as c God gaue a King to Israell , so he giueth wealth to them , in wrath : and in wrath will he take it away . 6. They bring Gods curse into their house , and leaue it vnto their children : So as these are the riches that are reserued to the owners thereof for their euill . Let not therefore care for children draw thee to any coueteous or vniust courses : but know that he who made thy sonne made thee also , and he who affoorded thee meanes of nourishment , will also affoord thy children sufficient succour . §. 8. Of Parents prouidence for their children . The head , whereunto all the particular duties , which parents owe to their children , may be referred , is A prouident care for their childrens good . This extendeth it selfe to all times , and to all things . To all times , as to the infancie , youth , and man-age of their children : and that not only while parents liue , but after their departure . To all things , namely , tending both to the temporall good of their children , and also to their spirituall good . Children are of the very substance of their parents , & therefore ought parents so farre to seeke their childrens good as their owne . The patternes of holy parents recorded and commended in Scripture , doe liuely set forth this prouident care . But this generall we will exemplifie in the particulars : and in order declare how parents must prouide both for the temporall , and also for the spirituall good of their children in euery degree of their age . They who at any time in any thing are negligent and carelesse of their childrens good , offend in the contrary to this generall dutie . The heinousnesse of which offences will appeare in the particulars . §. 9. Of a mothers care ouer her childe while it is in her wombe . The first age of a childe is the infancie thereof . I will therefore first shew how therein parents must procure the temporall good of their children , and then their spirituall good . The first part of a childs infancie is while it remaineth in the mothers wombe . Here therefore the dutie lieth principally vpon the mother : who so soone as she perceiueth a childe to be conceiued in her wombe , ought to haue an especiall care thereof , that ( so much as in her lieth ) the childe may be safely brought forth . ( * The heathen Philosophen , by light of nature , obserued this to be a dutie ; and prescribed it to mothers . ) A mother then must haue a tender care ouer her selfe when shee is with childe : for the childe being lodged in her , and receiuing nourishment from her ( as plants from the earth ) her well-being tendeth much to the good and safetie of the childe : but the hurt that commeth to her , maketh the childe the worse , if it be not a meanes to destroy it . Why was the charge of a abstaining from wine , strong drinke , and vncleane things , giuen to Manoahs wife , but because of the childe which she conceiued ? In this case there is a double bond to make mothers carefull of themselues . 1. Their owne , 2. Their childs good . Husbands also in this case must be very tender ouer their wiues , and helpfull to them in all things needfull , both in regard of that dutie which they owe to their wiues , and also of that they owe to their children . Why was Manoah so desirous to heare himselfe the forenamed direction which the Angell gaue to his wife ? and why did the Angell againe repeat it to him , but to shew it belonged to him to see her obserue it ? They who through violence of passion , whether of griefe , or anger , or through violent motion of the bodie , as by dancing , striuing , running , galloping on horsebacke , or the like : or through distemper of the bodie , by eating things hurtfull , by eating too much , by too much abstinence , by too much bashfulnesse in concealing their desires and longings ( as we speake ) cause any abortion or miscariage , fall into the offence contrary to the forenamed dutie . If women were perswaded that in conscience they are bound to the forenamed dutie , they would , I thinke , be more carefull of themselues . For if through their default , they themselues or their childe miscarry , they make themselues guilty of that miscariage : if both miscarry , they make themselues guiltie of the bloud of both ; at least in the court of conscience before God. But they who purposely take things to make away their children in their wombe , are in farre higher degree guiltie of bloud : yea euen of wilfull murther . For that which hath receiued a soule formed in it by God , if it be vniustly cast away , shall be reuenged . So farre forth as husbands are carelesse of their wiues being with childe , denying them things needfull , they are accessarie to the hurt , which the woman , or childe taketh , guiltie of the sin , and liable to the iudgement . §. 10. Of prouiding things needfull for the childe , so soone as it is borne : and of crueltie contrary thereunto . The next degree of a childs infancie , is while it is in the swadling bands , and remaineth a sucking childe . In this also the care especially lieth vpon the mother : yet so as the father must afford what helpe he can . The first dutie here required is , that sufficient prouision of all things needfull for a childe in that weaknesse be before hand prouided . What the particulars be , women better know , then I can expresse . For me , it is sufficient , to lay downe the dutie in generall : which is commended vnto vs in that worthy patterne of the Virgin Marie , who though she were very poore , and forced to trauell farre , and brought to bed in a strange place , where she was so little respected , as she was not afforded a place meet for a woman in her case , but was faine to content her selfe with a stable in a common Inne , yet she prouided for her childe . For it is said , She wrapped him in swadling clothes , Luk 2. 7. Contrary is the practise of such lewd and vnnaturall women , as leaue their new-borne children vnder stalls , at mens doores , in Church porches , yea many times in open field . It is noted as a point of vnnaturalnesse in the Ostrich , to leaue her eggs in the earth , and in the dust : in which respect she is said to be hardned against her young ones , as though they were not hers , Iob 39. 14 , 16. Much more hardned are the foresaid lewd women . The Eagle is counted an vnnaturall bird , because she thrusteth her young ones , which she hath brought forth , out of her nest . Are not then such mothers much more vnnaturall ? They oft lay their children forth in publike places , for others to shew that mercy , which they themselues haue not . The Ciuill Law iudgeth this to be a kinde of further . §. 11. Of giuing sucke to children . Among other needfull things , the milke of the breast is fit for ●oung babes , and with it they are to be nourished . I thinke none ●oubt of the equitie of this . It hath in all ages , and in all coun●ies , beene accounted the bestfood that can be for young babes . The metaphor , which S. Peter vseth , taken from young infants in these words , As new-borne babes desire the sincere milke of the ●ord ) confirmeth as much . So doth also the desire which such ●nfants haue to the milke of the breasts : and the abilitie , and ●omptnesse which is in them to sucke : and Gods prouidence in ●using a womans breasts to yeeld forth such milke : and the constant manner of nourishing little infants after this manner , commended in the Scriptures : and ( to conclude ) the naturall instinct which many vnreasonable creatures haue thus to nourish their young ones . They who on meere curiositie ( where no vrgent necessitie requireth ) try whether their children may not as birds be nourished without sucke , offend contrary to this dutie ; and reiect that meanes which God hath ordained as the best : and so oppose their shallow wit to his vnsearchable wisdome . §. 12. Of mothers giuing sucke to their owne children . Of nourishing children with brest-milke , there is no great question : therefore I haue with a touch passed it ouer . The chiefest question of doubt is concerning the partie who is bound to this dutie ; namely , whether the mother be bound to doe it her selfe or no. Many strong arguments there be to presse it vpon the consciences of mothers , and to shew that ( so farre as they are able ) they are bound to giue sucke to their owne children . Some are taken from the light of Gods word ; and some from the light of nature . Gods word doth in many places by iust consequence imply , that it is a bounden dutie : in other places it doth expresly commend it by the practise of holy women : and againe in other places it taketh it for a granted truth , and ruled case , not to be denied . 1. The consequences whereby the word implieth this dutie are these : 1. In the blessing giuen to Ioseph thus speaketh old Iaakob , God shall blesse thee with the blessing of the breasts , and of the wombe . By the blessing of the wombe , what can be meant , but children ? By the blessing of the breasts , what , but milke , whereby those children are nourished ? As if he had said ; I will blesse thee with such women , as shall both beare thee children , and also giue sucke to them which they beare . The consequence then is this : As it is a blessing to haue children of a true lawfull wife ; so to haue those children nursed of the same wife their mother . Obiect . They haue the blessing of breasts that haue other women to nurse their children . Answ . By the same reason it may be said , they haue the blessing of the wombe who haue strange women to beare them children . But the ioyning of these two branches of blessing together , sheweth that both must be taken in the same kinde : so that as the blessing of the wombe is to haue children of a mans wife , so the blessing of the breasts is to haue them nursed of his wife . If it be a blessing for the woman which beareth the childe to giue it sucke , then mothers are bound to performe this dutie . 2. It is denounced as a curse , that women shall haue a barren wombe and drie breasts . If it be a curse for women to haue drie breasts , then may not women wittingly make them drie : which all mothers doe , that giue not sucke to their children . 3. Manoahs wife being promised to beare a sonne , had this charge giuen her , Drinke no wine , nor strong drinke . &c. those things were especially hurtfull for her milke . It is therefore implied thereby , that she should so order her diet , as she might well nurse her childe , and haue good milke for him . 4. God by his good prouidence brought it to passe , that the mother of Moses ( though she were forced to cast out her childe ) should nurse her owne childe . Yea the mother her selfe was desirous to doe it , and therefore appointed her daughter ●o watch who should take it vp . These two circumstances ●mplie that it appertaineth to a mother to nurse her children . 5. The Apostle layeth this downe as a note of a good woman , who in her place hath beene carefull to doe her dutie , ●nd thereupon fit to doe seruice in Gods Church ( If she haue ●ourished her children , or word for word , If she haue fed her children . ) Now the proper food for young babes is breast-milk , which , by the Apostles rule , the mother must giue . 6. The same Apostle commandeth mothers to loue their children . How can a mother better expresse her loue to her ●oung babe , then by letting it sucke of her owne breasts ? As his is a testimony of loue , so it is a meanes of preseruing and increasing loue : for daily experience sheweth that mothers ●ue those children best to whom they themselues giue sucke . Summe these seuerall consequences together , and we ●all finde the dutie in question to be very strongly inforced hereby . 1. As a blessing it is promised , that mothers shall giue sucke to the children that they beare . 2. As a curse it is threatned , that women shall not be able to giue sucke . 3. An Angell gaue direction to a mother so to carrie her selfe as she might haue store of good milke for the childe which she should beare . 4. God by his speciall prouidence manifested that the proper mother was the best nurse for a childe . 5. It is the note of a good woman to performe this part of her particular calling , namely to nurse her owne childe . 6. Women ought to doe all the best duties of loue that they can to their children . Therefore mothers ought to nurse their owne children . II. Some of the most worthy patternes , in whose example this dutie is commended to mothers , are these . 1. Sarah gaue sucke to Isaak . This example is to be noted especially of the greater sort : as rich mens wiues , honourable mens wiues , and the like . For Sarah was an honourable woman , a princesse , a rich mans wife , a beautifull woman , aged and well growne in yeeres , and a mistresse of a family . Are not these excuses pretended by many mothers for not nursing children themselues ? 2. The virgin Mary gaue sucke to Iesus . This example is to be noted especially of the meaner sort , for the virgin Man was young , poore , persecuted , forced to remoue and flie with her childe from countrie to countrie . Are not these excuses pretended by other mothers ? These two patternes doe not only commend the duty , but also strippe all mothers that are negligent therein , of all excuse . To these may be added the examples of m Annah , of n Dauids mother , and of many others . What if also I adde the example of that true , naturall , affectionate mother who stood before Salomons throne to plead for her childe ? she thus saith of her selfe , o I arose to giue my sonne sucke , &c. If this had not beene a good motherly dutie , she would not then and there haue pleaded it . III. The places of Scripture which take this dutie for a matter granted , and for a ruled case , are such as these . 1. Where Sarah saith , Who would haue said to Abram that Sarah should haue giuen children sucke ? In this phrase she setteth forth Gods blessing in giuing Abram a sonne by her . Now in that she expresseth the blessing vnder this phrase of giuing sucke , she taketh it for grant , that the mother which beareth children must giue them sucke . 2. Where Dauid saith , thou diddest make me hope vpon my mothers breasts , he doth not onely imply that his mother gaue him sucke , but by the phrase maketh it a ruled case that the childe which suckes must hang vpon the mothers breast . 3. Where Salomon saith , O that thou wert as my brother that sucked the breasts of my mother , he taketh if also for grant , that brothers and sisters , as they come out of the same wombe , so they should sucke the same breasts , euen the breasts of her out of whose wombe they came , their owne mothers breasts . 4. Where the woman said to Christ , Blessed is the wombe that bare thee , and the paps which thou hast sucked , she taketh it for grant ( as it was an vsuall practise in those daies ) that the ●aps of that woman , whose wombe beare him , gaue him ●ucke . These arguments we haue from the light of Gods word : other we may haue from Gods workes and the light of nature , as 1. God hath giuen to women two breasts fit to containe ●nd hold milke : and nipples vnto them fit to haue milke drawne from them . Why are these thus giuen ? to lay them ●rth for ostentation ? There is no warrant for that in all Gods ●ord . They are directly giuen for the childs food that commeth out of the wombe ; for till the childe be borne , there is ●o milke in the breasts : anon after it is borne , milke ordinari●● floweth into the breasts : yea a great part of the meat which ●●ey eat turneth into milke . They make this admirable worke ●f Gods prouidence to be in vaine , that drie vp this spring , ●●d suffer not their children to partake of the benefit of it . 2. That nourishment whereon the childe fed in the mo●●ers wombe , and whereby it was there sustained , turneth into milke , and commeth into the breasts when the childe commeth out of the wombe . Whence we may gather , that of all womens milke , that womans milke is fittest for the childe , out of whose wombe the childe came . 3. Together with the milke passeth some smacke of the affection and disposition of the mother : which maketh mothers to loue such children best as they haue giuen sucke vnto : yea and oft times such children as haue sucked their mothers breasts , loue their mothers best : yea we may obserue many who haue sucked others milke , to loue those nurses all the daies of their life . 4. Other things are nourished by the same that they are bred . The earth out of which plants grow , ministreth nourishment to the said plants : trees that bring forth fruit yeeld sap to that fruit , whereby it groweth to ripenesse : vnreasonable creatures , and among them the most sauage wilde beasts , as Tigers and Dragons , yea sea-monsters giue sucke to their young ones ; whereupon the Prophet saith of women that giue not sucke to their Children , that they are more cruell then those sea-monsters , Like the Ostriches in the wildernesse : for the cruell Ostrich , and the hatefull Cucco are the two kinde of creatures which are noted to leaue their young ones for others to nourish ; the Ostrich leaueth her eggs in the dust : the Cucco leaueth hers in other birds nests . Other creatures ( if nature afford them not milke and dugges , as to birds it doth not ) feed their young ones other waies , yet by themselues . 5. Shall I adde another argument which daily experience confirmeth , namely Gods blessing vpon this motherly dutie : commonly such children as are nursed by their mothers , prosper best . Mothers are most tender ouer them , and cannot indure to let them lie crying out , without taking them vp . and stilling them ; as nurses will let them crie and crie againe , if they be about any businesse of their owne . For who are commonly chosen to be nurses ? euen poore countrie women which haue much worke to doe , and little helpe ; and so are forced to let the childe lie and crie , many times till it burst againe . Children nursed by their mothers are for the most part more cleanly , and neatly brought vp , freer from diseases ; not so many die ; I am sure not so many through negligence cast away . The number of nurse children that die euery yeere is very great . It hath beene obserued in many countrie villages , that the most part , that from time to time die there , are nurse children . Are not mothers that might haue nursed their owne children if they would , accessary to the death of those that are cast away by the nurses negligence ? On these and other like reasons heathen women , and very sauages , haue in all ages beene moued to nurse their owne children : and some heathen Philosophers haue vrged and pressed the necessitie of this dutie . Neuer was it more neglected , then among those that beare the name of Christians . Let mothers know of what ranke or degree so euer they be , that ( out of the case of necessitie ) they haue no warrant to put forth their children to others to nurse . We read not in all the Scripture of any holy women that euer did it . §. 13. Of the obiections for putting children forth to nurse . Obiect . Many nurses are mentioned in Scripture , as Rebekahs nurse , Mephibosheths nurse , Ioash his nurse , and others . 1. Answ . Such nurses mentioned in Scripture were commonly drie nurses . Rebekahs nurse went with her before she was maried : how can it be thought that she was a milch nurse ? Could they tell when Rebekah should haue a childe ? or when he had one , that Deborah ( the nurse there mentioned ) should haue milke for her ? It is said that Naomi became nurse to Ruths ●hilde : now Naomi was old , long before this she was past ●hild-bearing , without an husband for many yeeres : how then was it possible that she should giue sucke ? She was therefore a ●rie nurse , as other nurses mentioned in Scripture . 2. Answ . The mothers of those children which are said to ●aue nurses ( if those nurses were milch-nurses ) might be ●ead : or if liuing , not able to giue sucke for want of milke , ●ipple , or for some other like defect : or if able , sinne in putting forth their children . 3. Answ . Though it be said that there were nurses , yet is no where said , that a mother put forth her childe to sucke . 2. Obiect . Pharohs daughter put forth the childe which she ●●oke for her owne to nurse . Answ . She bare not this childe , nor was the naturall mother of it , so as this is nothing to the purpose . Yea it maketh against the obiectors , in that the true mother of this childe nursed it . 3. Obiect . The metaphor taken from nurses is oft vsed , and applied to God , and to Gods ministers . 1. Answ . The vsing of a thing by way of comparison and resemblance doth not simply iustifie it : instance the parable of the vniust steward , and of a theefe . 2. Answ . The metaphor may be taken from a drie nurse as well as a milch nurse : for the comparisons are not vsed of giuing sucke , but of bearing and carrying in armes , as drie nurses vse to carry children . 3. Answ . The metaphors are most fitly taken from mothers that are nurses to their owne children . 4. Obiect . Many mothers haue not such skill in giuing sucke as nurses haue . Answ . Let them learne seeing it is their dutie . 5. Obiect . Mothers that are of great wealth and high place cannot endure the paine of nursing , nor take the paines in handling young children as they must be handled . 1. Answ . The greatest that be must set themselues to doe that duty which God requireth at their hands , though it be with paine and paines . Note Sarahs example before recorded . 2. Answ . By this it appeareth , that if other women could beare their children in the wombe nine moneths , and endure the paine of trauell for them , they would hire them to doe it . But seeing they doe the one ( namely beare and bring forth their owne children with hard labour ) why should they not doe the other ? If they say there is an vnauoidable necessity of bearing and bringing forth their children ; I answer , that conscience ought to moue them to nurse those children , which necessity forceth them to bring forth . God by this latter o● nursing children maketh triall of women whether they will for conscience sake , doe that duty which they may if they will put off . But because God knew that many will doe no more then necessity laieth vpon them , he hath made it a matter o● impossibility for women to beare and bring forth their children by another . 3. Answ . If women would with cheerefulnesse set themselues to performe this duty , much of the supposed paine and paines would be lessened . 4. Answ . Though they put not forth their children to nurse , they may for their ease entertaine a nurse , so they giue sucke themselues . 6. Obiect . A mother that hath a trade , or that hath the care of an house , will neglect much businesse by nursing her childe : and her husband will saue more by giuing halfe a crowne a weeke to a nurse , then if his wife gaue the childe sucke . Answ . No outward businesse appertaining to a mother can be more acceptable to God then the nursing of her childe : this is the most proper worke of her speciall calling , therefore all other businesses must giue place to this , and this must not be left for any other businesse . As for the husbands sauing by putting the childe forth to nurse , no gaine may giue a dispensation against a bounden duty . 7. Obiect . It will breake tender faire women , and make them looke old too soone . 1. Answ . Gods ordinance must not giue place to womens ●●icenesse . Sarah was faire and old : The Virgin Mary was faire and young . 2. Answ . Drying vp a womans milke will more breake her , then her childes sucking of it : for it is a meanes both of better health , and also of greater strength , as to beare children , so to giue them sucke . Barren women and bearing women which put forth their children to sucke , are most subiect to sicknesse and weaknesse . The drawing forth of a womans milke by her childe is a meanes to get and preserue a good stomach , which is a great preseruatiue of good health . 8. Obiect . Husbands are disturbed in the night time , and hindred of their sleepe by their wiues giuing sucke to their children . 1. Answ . By this reason neither mothers nor other nurses which haue husbands , should giue sucke to children . 2. Answ . Seeing children come from the loines of the father , as well as out of the wombe of the mother , they must be content to endure some disturbance as well as their wiues , and so much the rather that they may the more pitty their wiues , and afford vnto them what helpe they can . 9. Obiect . Many husbands will not suffer their wiues to nurse their children themselues . Answ . Because it is a bounden duty , wiues must vse all the meanes they can by themselues or others to perswade their husbands to let them performe it : they must take heede that they make not this a pretext to couer their owne sloth , and lothnesse to this duty : they may not make themselues accessarie to their husbands fault by prouiding a nurse , and sending the childe away themselues : if their husbands will stand vpon their authority , and be perswaded by no meanes to the contrary , they must be meere patients in suffering the childe to be taken away . 10. Obiect . Many poore women maintaine their house by nursing other folkes children . Answ . If they were not that way imployed , they might take paines in some other thing . But the gaine of one may not make another neglect her duty . 11. Obiect . Some mothers cannot giue sucke , they haue no milke : others cannot very well , in that they haue no nipples , or they haue sore breasts , or are sickly , or it may be that they haue such a disease , as the childe , if it should sucke of their milke , would draw to it selfe , and so the sucking might proue very dangerous to the childe . 1. Answ . God requireth no impossibilities : wherefore in propounding the duty I put in this caution ( so far as they are able . ) 2. God requireth mercie , and not sacrifice : if therefore in truth it be so that the mothers giuing sucke to the childe will be dangerous to her selfe or to the childe , she may and ought to forbeare : for giuing sucke is but as sacrifice to preuenting of danger , which is mercie . But women must take heed that they pretend not inability , and danger without iust cause . Some are themselues the cause of wanting milke because they will not let it be drawne downe ; or because they will not vse meanes ( for meanes there are ) to get and increase milke . There are meanes also to raise nipples where the breasts are very flat . Refusing to giue sucke many times causeth some sickishnesse in a woman , and sore breasts , which might be preuented with the childes sucking . If the forenesse be only in the nipples , a mother with enduring a little more paine may safely giue the childe sucke . Many mothers haue giuen their children sucke when bloud hath runne by the mouth of the childe by reason of sore nipples , and yet both mother and childe done very well . 12. Obiect . Diuers children being nursed by the mother haue died one after another . Answ . Due and thorow search must be made by those that are skilfull : and if any cause be found in the mother , then the rule holdeth , Mercy and not sacrifice : but if none can be found , the issue must be referred to Gods prouidence : and the vncertaine euen must not be an hinderance to a knowne dutie . Thus the answering of the forenamed obiections maketh the point so much the more cleere . §. 14. Of the fathers dutie in incouraging his wife to nurse her childe . The dutie which on a fathers part in this respect is required , is that he incourage his wife , and helpe her with all needfull things for the performance of this dutie . It is noted of Elka●ah , that he suffered his wife to tarry at home while she gaue sucke to her sonne , and would not force her to goe vp to the tabernacle as his other wife did , but gaue her all the ease and content he could , saying to her , Doe what seemeth thee good . And of Abraham it is noted , that after Sarah had done giuing the childe sucke , he made a great feast , euen the day that Isaak was weined : one end whereof was to testifie his reioycing for Gods blessing on her motherly dutie so well performed . §. 15. Of the faults contrarie to a mothers nursing her childe . Contrary to this dutie doe all such mothers offend , as for any by-respects when no necessity requireth put forth their children to be nursed by others . 1. Some doe it for ease and quiet , because they cannot endure to haue their sleepe broken , or to heare their childe wrangle and crie . 2. Others doe it for nicenesse , because they are loth to open their breasts , or to soile their cloathes . 3. Others vpon pride , conceiting that their beauty would be impaired , and they looke old too soone . 4. Others vpon gaine , because they can haue a childe cheaper nursed abroad then at home , where , at least , they must hire a maid the more . 5. Others vpon pleasure , that they might more freely ride abroad , and meet their Gossips . 6. Others vpon other by-respects : all which doe argue much selfe-loue : little loue to their childe , and little respect to God. They can be counted but halfe-mothers : for nursing a childe is as much as bearing and bringing it forth . §. 16. Of a fathers fault in hindring his wiues nursing of her child . To the forenamed fault of mothers doe all such fathers make themselues accessary , as forbid their wiues to nurse their children , or are a griefe to them by their complaints of trouble , disquiet and expence : or afford not things needfull , or doe not incourage them all they can to doe it . The mothers both paine and paines is the greatest : it is in comparison but a small thing that fathers can endure therein . Their fault therefore must needs be the greater , if any way they be an occasion of their childes putting forth to nurse : which I haue the rather noted , because husbands for the most part are the cause that their wiues nurse not their owne children : and that partly by suffering , and partly by egging them on to put out their children . If husbands were willing that their wiues should performe this dutie , and would perswade and incourage them thereto , and afford them what helpes they could , where one mother now nurseth her childe , twenty would doe it . §. 17. Of parents ioynt care about their childrens Baptisme . There is a further dutie to be performed of parents to their children euen in their infancy , and that is in regard of their spirituall good , which is this , Parents ought to procure that their children be rightly baptized in due season . This is indeed a common dutie appertaining to both parents , but most principally to the father , and that for two reasons . 1. The father is the chiefe and principall Gouernour , and hath the greatest charge : accordingly he ought to haue the greatest care euen in such matters as are common to both . 2. The mother at that time by reason of her trauell and deliuery is weake , and not in case to haue her head much troubled with many cares ; much lesse able her selfe to take order for such weighty matters . Only the husband is to make knowne to his wife ( if she be not extraordinarily weake ) what his purpose is concerning the place , time , manner , and other like circumstances of baptizing the childe , and to aduise with her about the name , witnesses , and such like points . And if the husband be too backward and negligent , the wife ought so farre as she is able to put him in minde of his dutie therein , and to stirre him vp by her selfe or some other to performe it . §. 18. Of the reasons to moue parents to see their children baptized . That parents are bound to procure Baptisme for their children these reasons declare . 1. The commandement of God concerning circumcising ●hildren : in the roome whereof Baptisme succeedeth now ●nder the Gospell ( Col. 2. 11 , 12. ) Gods commandement to ●his dutie was first giuen to Abraham : and that for himselfe ●nd all his posterity to obserue ( Gen. 17. 10. ) After this it was ●n the law laid downe as a positiue statute , Leu. 12. 3. 2. The practise of the Iewes in a faithfull and constant ob●●ruance of this ordinance : as of Abraham ; of Zachary and ●lizabeth : of Ioseph and Mary , and many others . Obiect . The children which were borne in the wildernesse were not circumcised . Answ . They had no abiding place in the wildernesse , but were euer and anon remouing : so as it would haue beene dangerous for the children to haue beene circumcised : in that extraordinary case this rule tooke place , I will haue mercy and not sacrifice . 3. The practise of Christians , who beleeuing were themselues and their whole houshold baptized . Vnder whole houshold children must needs be comprised . 4. Christs embracing and blessing such children as were brought to him : and rebuking those that would haue kept them from him . 5. The promise of God made to them : for seeing God is so gratious as to extend his promise to our children : our care must be to procure the seale which God offereth for the confirmation of that promise . 6. The right they haue to Gods Kingdome . Baptisme is an euidence of that their right . It is parents duty to get them that euidence . If children haue iust title to any lands and reuenues , or to any earthly honours and dignities , parents will doe what they can to make that title sure vnto them euen in their infancy : much more carefull should they be to make that rich and glorious inheritance , which is in heauen reserued for them , as sure vnto them as they can : now no better meanes for the effecting of this then Baptisme . 7. Their conception and birth in sinne . Children drew contagion from their parents : therefore great reason it is that their parents should see them washed with the water of regeneration . 8. The comfort which from the performance of this dutie will arise to Christian parents , yea and to the children also themselues when they come to the age of vnderstanding . When parents behold the couenant of God surely sealed and confirmed to their children , they cannot ( if at least they beare any loue to their children ) but much reioyce therein . And it must needs also much comfort the childe when ( being of vnderstanding ) he shall know that from his infancy he hath caried the seale and pledge of his regeneration . 9. The constant continued custome of the true catholicke Church , which euer since the Apostles time hath afforded the sacrament of baptisme to children . §. 19. Of Parents procuring their children to be rightly baptized . There being such forceable motiues to stirre vp parents to performe the dutie , ( which motiues shew it to be a weightie dutie ) I will further shew how this dutie ought to be performed . Two things in childrens baptisme ought to be obserued . 1. That it be rightly done . 2. That it be seasonably done . In the right performance thereof , some things are necessarie , and some expedient . Things of necessitie are these especially : 1. That the childe be baptized by a Minister of the word . 2. That it be baptized with the element of water : the only element sanctified to this purpose . 3. That the forme prescribed by Christ ( Matth. 28. 19. ) be vsed , In the name of the Father , and of the Sonne , and of the Holy Ghost : whereby the vnitie of the Godhead , and trinitie of Persons is plainly set forth . 4. That the proper rite be vsed of applying the water to the bodie of the childe , so as at least the face of the childe may be sprinkled therewith . Things of expediencie are , 1. That the childe be baptized in a publike place , where Gods people ordinarily meet together , being set apart for the worship and seruice of God. 2. That such a time be chosen out , as an assembly of Saints may be there present . These two circumstances are the rather to be obserued , because Baptisme is one of the solemne parts of Gods publike worship ; a pledge of our incorporation into the bodie of Christ , and communion of his Saints , and therefore with the more solemnitie , ( as a matter of great moment ) before many witnesses , with the assistance of the faithfull prayers of an assembly of Saints , to be performed . §. 20. Of Parents care to giue a fit name to their childe at his Baptisme . A third matter of great expediencie about a childs baptisme , is , that Parents be carefull in giuing a fit name . It belongeth to Parents to giue the name to their childe : for so holy parents ( whose patterne in Scripture is in this respect commended vnto vs ) haue done from time to time : and for their warrant to doe it , it is worthy to be noted , that when God was pleased to appoint a name to a childe , he gaue in charge to the Parent so to name him , saying to him , a Thou shalt call his name thus and thus . It is also euident , that the time of Baptisme is the fittest time for giuing the name . c Vnder the Law , childrens names were giuen at their Circumcision : and so vnder the Gospell it hath in all ages beene vsed : and that for these reasons . 1. That their names may be a testimonie of their baptisme . 2. That so oft as they heare their names , they may be put in minde of their baptisme . 3. That they might know how by name they are giuen to Christ to be his souldiers , and therefore there must be no starting from him . 4. That they may also be assured , that being baptized with water and the spirit , by name they are registred in heauen . Now because names are so solemnly giuen , and of so good vse , most meet it is that fit names should be giuen to children . And for proofe hereof , let the names which in Scripture are recorded to be giuen by God himselfe , and by such holy men and women as were guided by his spirit , be obserued ; and we shall finde them to be holy , sober , and fit names . For direction to parents in this dutie , I will set downe some sorts and kinds of names as be fit , and beseeming Christians . 1. Names which haue some good signification : and among them such as are warranted by the Scripture , as Iohn ( the grace of God ) Ionathan ( the gift of God ) Andrew ( manly ) Clement ( meeke ) Simeon ( obedient ) Hannah ( gratious ) Prudens ( wise ) and such like : that thus their name may stirre them vp to labour after the vertue signified thereby . 2. Names which haue in times before vs beene giuen to persons of good note , whose life is worthy our imitation , as Isaak , Dauid , Peter , Marie , Elizabeth , and such like : that the names may moue them to imitate those worthies . 3. Names of our owne ancestors and predecessors , to preserue a memorie of the familie : which appeareth to haue beene an ancient practise euen among Gods people , in that the friends would haue had Zachariahs sonne named Zachariah ; and when the mother had iust cause to name him Iohn , they answer , none of thy kindred is called by this name . 4. Vsuall names of the country , which custome hath made familiar , as Henry , Edward , Robert , William , and such like among vs. §. 21. Of Parents care in bringing their children to be baptized in due season . Though Christians are not so strictly tied to a set day , as the Iewes were to the eight day ; yet from that strict direction giuen to the Iewes , we may well gather , that it is not meet for Christians to defer the baptizing of their children beyond eight dayes : for a young childe of that age may with more ease , and lesse danger , be baptized , then circumcised . The most seasonable time I take to be the day whereon Gods people vse in the place where the childe is borne , publikely to assemble together to worship God next after the birth of the child , if at least it fall not out within two or three dayes after , which is somewhat with the soonest both for mother and childe . Whether we respect the honour of God ( the riches of whose mercy is liuely set forth in the sacrament of baptisme ) or the good of our childe ( which in that sacrament receiueth a pledge and seale of that rich mercy of God ) Baptisme is of great consequence : and therefore the first season of performing it to be taken . For parents by their diligence and due speed therein , giue euidence both of their zeale to Gods glory , and also of their earnest desire of the childs spirituall good . §. 22. Of Parents faults in neglecting their childrens Baptisme . Contrary to the forenamed dutie of Parents about well baptizing their children , are many aberrations , as 1. The corrupt opinion of Anabaptists , who denie the lawfulnesse of baptizing children . The arguments before noted are sufficient to stop their mouthes . 2. The practise of Separatists ( comming too neere to Anabaptisme ) who excepting against the ministerie and orders of our Church , doe what they can to keepe their children from that Sacrament . And to that end carry their wiues ready to be deliuered vnto a strange place , where they are not knowne , and anon after they are deliuered , priuily conuey wife , childe , and all away , that so the Magistrate may not , against their will , cause their childe to be baptized : and hauing no ministerie of their owne , nor meanes to conuey the childe ouer sea , keepe it many yeeres vnbaptized . Where is the euidence of their faith in Gods promise , of their respect to Gods ordinance , and of their desire of their childs spirituall good ? Though it be a great wrong to children to be kept from baptisme , yet the sinne lieth on such parents as procure not baptisme for their children : especially at that age when their children cannot gainsay it . 3. The peruerse opinion and practise of certaine ancient heretikes , who in stead of baptizing children with water , had them branded with an hot iron . They grounded their error on a false interpretation of this phrase ( he shall baptize with the Holy Ghost and with fire . ) Answ . 1. They erre in taking this word ( fire ) literally and properly , which was meant mystically and metaphorically . 2. They erre in applying that to the outward action of a Minister , which was meant of the inward operation of Christ . By this their misinterpretation they thwart the maine scope of him who first vsed that phrase , which was to manifest the difference betwixt all other Ministers and Christ Iesus . 4. The opinion and practise of those , who vse other formes of Baptisme , besides this , ( In the name of the Father , and of the Sonne , and of the Holy Ghost . ) Their opinion and practise is grounded on certaine concise phrases vsed by the Apostles : such as these , Baptized in the name of Iesus Christ : In the name of the Lord : In the name of the Lord Iesus , &c. Answ . Those phrases rather set forth the very substance and inward matter of Baptisme , then the forme thereof . 5. Their opinion and practise , who care not by whom their children are baptized , whether heretiques , idolaters , laicks , or women : Little doe they regard the comfort of conscience , and strength of faith , that ariseth from this ; that a lawfull Minister in Gods roome and name , as Gods ambassador , putteth the seale of God to his couenant . 6. The practise of those as ( I know not vpon what nicenesse or state ) must haue their children baptized at home in their priuate house . This manner of baptising taketh away much from the honour of that high ordinance , which ought to be done with all the seemly solemnitie that may be . 7. Their practise who bring their childe to Church to be baptised , accompanied only with the Midwife , and three witnesses . It were almost as good be baptised in a priuate house : for it is not the walls of the Church , but the assembly of Saints , that addeth to the honour of the Sacrament , and is most of all to be respected . 8. Their practise who vpon state , or for great witnesses , or such by-respects put off the baptising of their children longer then is meet , some , two or three weekes , some , two or three moneths , some longer : whereby they shew too light esteeme of this Sacrament , in that they preferre meere complementall circumstances before a matter of so great moment . God oft sheweth his iust indignation against such , in taking away their ●hildren vnbaptised before the time set downe by them for baptisme be come . 9. Their practise who care not what heathenish , idolatrous , ●idiculous names they giue to their children . What respect ●oe they shew either to God in whose name their childe is ●aptised , or to the holy Sacrament it selfe , or to the congrega●ion of Saints before whom the name is giuen , or to the childe ●● selfe who all his life is to carrie that name ? §. 23. Of parents prouiding things needfull for the life and health of their children . Hitherto of the duties of parents respecting their childrens Infancie . Such as respect their childhood follow . The childhood of a childe is ●eckoned from the time that it ●eginneth to be of any discretion and vnderstanding till it be ●t to be placed forth : euen so Many distinguish the whole course of a mans life into foure parts . 1. Childhood 2. Youth . 3. Man-age 4. Old-age . long as ordinarily it liueth vnder the parents gouernment . The duties which parents for this time must performe to their children may be drawne to these two heads . 1. Care to bring them vp . 2. Care to place them forth . For their well training vp , respect must be had both to their temporall and also to their spirituall good . Two things are required of parents , in regard of the temporall good of their children . 1. To nourish them well . 2. To nurture them well . Children must be well Fed. Taught .   Child-hood from his birth to 14. yeeres . Youth from 14 to 25. Man-age from 25. to 50. Old age from thence to his death . But for better distinguishing the duties which parents are to performe , I follow not so accurate a diuision , but rather distinguish the degrees of age according to the times wherein new duties are to be performed : and therefore I make a distinction betwixt infancie and childhood . Feed them in discipline , saith the Apostle . Vnder nourishment are comprised all needfull things for health and life : which parents ought to prouide for their children , as 1. Food , which Christ taketh for a ruled case . Whence he draweth his argument to shew that God will prouide for his children . What father ( saith he ) if his sonne aske him bread would giue him a stone , &c. Mat. 7. 9 , 10 , 11. 2. Apparell , for it is expresly noted , that Israel made his son a coat , ( Gen. 37. 3. ) 3. Recreation , which in young children especially is needfull for their health . In that Zachary chap. 8. vers . 5. told the Iewes , and that in way of blessing , that boyes and girles should be playing in the streets , he implieth that it is a lawfull and meet thing , which parents should permit vnto their children . But yet the time , and measure , and kinde of recreation must be well ordered . 4. Meanes for recouery of health when they are sicke : for this end was it , that a Ieroboam sent his wife to the Prophet , in behalfe of his sonne who was sicke : that b the Ruler came to Christ for his sonne also who was at point of death ; and that many others came to him for their sonnes and daughters being ill . Whatsoeuer other things are needfull , parents to their power must prouide for their children : else the Apostle counteth them worse then Infidels . Both equitie and necessitie require thus much of parents . Equitie , in that children owe all their paines and seruice to their parents while they are vnder them , and are wholly at their command , and in that regard haue no meanes to prouide needfull things but by their parents helpe . Parents therefore in all right must herein be helpfull to them . Necessitie , in that , if the life and health of children be not well prouided for , no dutie , no seruice can be expected at their hands . §. 24. Of parents too much niggardlinesse , and carelesnesse toward their children . There are two extremes contrary to the forenamed prouident care of parents for their childrens good : In the defect , Couetousnesse . In the excesse , Lauishnesse . Some parents so farre faile in the defect , as they almost starue their children through want of necessaries : not affording them sufficient wholesome food , nor meet and comely appa●ell , but suffer them to goe tagged and ragged like beggars ●rats : if they be sicke , God may recouer them if he please , but the parents will vse no meanes when they are well , they afford them no time of refreshing themselues by any recreation , but ●uer-strictly hold them in . There is not only want of charity , ●ut plaine vnnaturalnesse in such parents : euen more then in ●●e most cruell beasts . For the wilde beasts doe with much ten●ernesse prouide for their young ones . §. 25. Of parents too much lauishnesse and indulgency vpon their children . Others surpasse as much in the excesse , feeding them too ●●intily : attiring them too garishly : tending them too cockeringly : and letting them spend too much time in sport and play . Many and great are the mischiefes that follow thereupon : as 1. They who are in their childhood daintily fed , and too much pampered , besides that for the most part they are most sickly , they will in time grow so squeamish , and choice of meats , as their parents shall not know what to prouide for them , or when to giue it them : The full soule loatheth an hony combe : yea if a stranger commeth to the table , where such a childe sitteth , he may soone obserue that he hath beene too daintily fed . If at first children be fed with ordinary moderate diet , they will afterwards both be in better health and liking , and also more contentedly , and thankfully accept whatsoeuer shall be prouided for them . But excesse breedeth diseases both in body and minde . 2. Vanity in apparell doth also much corrupt young children : for there is in them euen from the cradle a naturall disposition to outward brauery : now for parents to pranke them vp , what is it but to blow vp the fire of that vanity , and make it arise into such a flame as in time may much scorch the parents themselues , and vtterly consume the children : and yet how vsuall a fault is this ? how monstrously doe many parents offend therein ? what foolish fashion is vsed of the greatest swaggerers , and lightest strumpets , which they will not bring their children vnto , and that when their children are not able to discerne betwixt stuffes or colours ? what can this proclaime but parents pride and folly ? Proud maids are many times the instruments of pranking vp children ( especially when they are little ones ) more then is meet : but yet the blame lieth on parents for suffering it . 3. Tending children too cockishly maketh them too long children , and too tender : and oft altereth a good constitution of body . Some are so ouer-much tender of their children , as if a childe neuer so little complaine , or refuse the meate ( though for daintinesse or fulnesse ) the Physician must presently be sent for , and the Apothecary sent vnto , and the childe with supposed and apish kindnesse made much worse . 4. Too much sport maketh them wilde , rude , vnfit to be trained vp to any good calling , and spendeth their spirits , and wasteth their strength too much . Yet many parents care not how much time their children spend in sport , and how little in learning : they thinke it duls their children too much to be held to schoole , or to any learning : whereas indeed too much play infatuates them more , and learning would much sharpen their wits . §. 26. Of well nurturing children . I referre good nurture in part to the temporall good of children , because ( as afterwards we shall heare in the particulars ) it is an especiall meanes of the outward temporall welfare of the childe euen in this world . Vnlesse this be added to nourishing , wherein doe reasonable men and women exceed vnreasonable beasts ? the most cruell beasts that be are very tender ( as we heard before ) towards their young ones , nourishing them , and prouiding all things needfull for them till they can shift for themselues . But as God hath giuen to man a reasonable soule , an vnderstanding head , capacity , docility and aptnesse to learne , so ought parents to make vse of those parts and gifts , lest for want of vsing them , in time they be lost : and so children proue little better then bruits . In this respect the prouerbe is true , better be vnfed then vntaught . Experience sheweth that good education is better then a great portion . The Holy Ghost doth very much presse this point on parents , as we shall after heare in the particulars . For I will handle these three points . 1. The kindes of nurture . 2. The time when it is to be done . 3. The meanes of well doing it . §. 27. Of parents neglect in nurturing children . Contrary to good nurture is too much liberty : which oft bringeth much woe , and vtter ruine vpon children : it is the greatest enemy that can be of good education , and the nurse of all vice Yet many parents care not to let their children liue as they list : all the care they take , is that they be fed and apparelled . This is a common fault both of rich , and of poore parents . The rich pretend that their children need no education , because they haue enough to leaue them : not knowing that education is an especiall meanes to make them keepe and well vse that enough . The poore pretend that they are not able to bring vp their children to any thing : not considering that the Lord by his prouidence hath so ordered the affaires of men , that as there are fit imployments for the greatest , so also for the meanest , which without much cost may be vsed . The fault therefore wholly resteth in the negligence of parents . And if thereupon children fall into any riot , their parents shall answer for it . §. 28. Of parents teaching their children good manners . The nurturing of children before mentioned consisteth 1. In teaching them good manners . 2. In training them vp to a good calling . Not only heathen men , and other moralists which were but meere naturall ciuill men , but also the Holy Ghost himselfe hath prescribed many rules of good manners , and much vrged and pressed the same . 1. The word * nurture mentioned by the Apostle in this text which we haue in hand , implieth as much : and the phrase which Solomon vseth , b Traine vp a childe in the way he should goe : that is , teach him how to order the course of his life . 2. The many c precepts of reuerencing our superiours , and carying our selues with respect one to another , are rules of good manners . Hereof there be very many in scripture . 3. Those rules are d commended by many examples of holy men recorded in Scripture . 4. Such as haue e failed in the rules of good manners , and rudely carried themselues , are reproued by the Holy Ghost . Neither is it without good reason that this point is so set forth . For 1. Good manners are a very comely and seemely thing . But it beseemeth Christians to doe all things decently . That decency is not only to be applied to the affaires of Gods Church , but also to the whole course of our life , in which respect we are commanded to walke * decently , that is , to order all our actions and the whole course of our life mannerly . 2. They are a thing of good report , and that both to parents and children : Now we must doe all things that are of good report . 3. They worke a kinde of delight , and loue , and admiration , in those that behold them , as is noted of the Queene of Sheba when she beheld the comely cariage of Solomons seruants : and of the Egyptians when they beheld the orderly sitting of Iosephs brethren . 4. They are an outward ornament to piety and religion , and make it to be much more respected : in which respect S. Peter exhorteth beleeuing wiues well to order their conuersation before infidell husbands : and S. Paul exhorteth all sorts of christians to walke decently toward them that are without . The Holy Ghost hauing thus vrged the point of good manners , we may not thinke it a meere complementall matter , and a needlesse point , but a bounden duty . §. 29. Of the obiections against good manners . 1. Obiect . Religion and grace consisteth not in good manners : many that haue not a sparke of Gods feare in their hearts , are able to carry themselues in their outward behauiour very orderly and mannerly . Answ . Though grace consist not wholly in it , yet cannot grace well be without it : it is a great ornament and comelinesse thereunto . And though mannerlinesse may be seuered from a feare of God , yet Gods feare will not be seuered from it . Restraining grace may be in him who hath no renewing grace : but renewing grace presupposeth restraining grace , euen as reason presupposeth sense , though sense may be without reason . If such as feare not God can carry themselues comely and mannerly , what a shame is it for such as seeme to feare God , not to doe so ? shall not those be a witnesse against these ? 2. Obiect . Good manners are an hinderance to grace : they who are most diligent in teaching or practising the one , are commonly most negligent in the other . Answ . This is a meere cauill . Sure I am that grace is no hinderance to good manners . If any make good manners an hinderance to grace , it is their fault . 3. Obiect . Good manners to grace are as mint , annise and cummin , to the great and weighty things of the law . Answ . Grant it to be so : yet seeing both may stand together , why should they be seuered ? Christs rule is this , These things ought ye to haue done , and not to leaue the other vndone . 4. Obiect . Many that make great shew of religion are very rude , and vnmannerly . Answ . If there be onely a shew of religion in them , no maruell that they haue no manners . If some examples of such as are truly religious and want good manners should be shewed , their patterne is no president , much lesse can it proue that to be no duty which Gods word hath set downe for a duty . Many that well performe some duties , much faile in other duties . Who almost followeth Gods word as he should in euery thing ? §. 30. Of parents suffering their children to be rudely brought vp . Contrary to parents care in teaching their children good manners , is dissolutenesse : when parents suffer their children to grow vp in rudenesse , not caring how they carry themselues at home or abroad , toward their parents , or toward others . Rude bringing vp maketh children to be of a crooked , peruerse , stubborne , churlish , furly , doggish disposition ; as on the other side , good nurture in this kinde breedeth in genuity , amiablenesse , curtesie , and kindnesse . If such as are rudely brought vp be children of professors of the true religion , they bring a staine vpon their profession : yea they dishonour God , as if he were the author of vnmannerlinesse and confusion , against which the Holy Ghost protesteth : and they make themselues and their children a scorne in the eie and mouth of profane persons , who will be ready to point and say , Behold the children of professors , how rudely they are brought vp , and ill taught : they haue not so much as good manners in them . For auoiding this blemish , Schoole-masters and all such as haue the charge of trayning vp young children , must bean helpe to parents in teaching children good manners . §. 31. Of parents training vp their children to some good calling . The second branch of good nurture is a training vp of children vnto a good calling . This charge ( traine vp a child in the way that he should go● ) directly condeth to this purpose . This duty hath from the beginning of the world beene performed by parents , and their performance thereof commended by the holy Ghost . Adam brought vp his sonnes to seuerall callings : one was a a keeper of sheepe , another a tiller of ground . The like is noted of b Iaakobs sonnes , c Labans , and d Reguels daughters , e Ishas sonne , and many others . Much good may from hence arise to parents themselues , to their children , and to the people and places where such children shall liue . 1. A good calling is an especiall meanes for children to maintaine themselues and family , to releeue those that stand in need , to ease their parents , and ( if the need of parents require it ) to releeue and maintaine them . 2. It is that way wherein Gods Angels haue a charge to keepe them while they walke in it . 3. It is a meanes wherein and whereby they may be seruiceable to the common wealth where they liue . 4. It is the best place wherein the generall duties of Christianity may be most manifested , and best performed . 5. It is the best ordinary meanes that can be prescribed to keepe a childe from the vanities of youth , from immoderate pursuit of pleasures , from vnlawfull games , from idlenesse , from ill company , and such like euils ; which , as they are sinnes in themselues , so occasions and prouocations to other most ●grieuous and enormous sinnes , and proue to be the very ●bane of youth . Obiect . Many parents haue good lands to leaue to their children : what need is there of a calling to such ? Answ . 1. Much land may soone be consumed by such as haue not skill well to vse it . 2. Maintenance is but one end of a calling , and that not the chiefest and most principall . 3. More good may be done by skill in a calling , then by great store of land . 4. We are borne for others as well as for our selues : it is not therefore sufficient to say I haue enough to maintaine my selfe . §. 32. Of parents care in choosing a fit calling for their children . The point in generall being declared to be a dutie , I will adde some directions for the better performing of it . 1. Children are to be trained vp in those things which are the ground worke of all callings , as reading , writing , and principles of learning . Whatsoeuer the particular calling be , these will be of great vse to any one . Many that haue not beene taught them at first , would giue much for them afterwards . Parents at the first might teach their children those things with much ease and small charge , which afterwards cannot be so well learned , partly for want of leasure , and partly because the parts of those who are growne in yeares are not so fresh and fit to learne , as in child-hood they were . Those things are not to be contemned as small , without which great things cannot stand . 2. The calling whereunto children are trained vp must be lawfull , approued by Gods word , and not against the generall rules thereof : so may they keepe a good conscience in the exercise thereof . 3. The calling must be fit for the childe that is trained vp to it . As there are diuers callings , so there are diuers abilities of sundry children : some are fittest for callings of wit and learning : others for callings that require an able and strong body . Wherein the wise disposing prouidence of God is much commended : for thus are men much more vsefull one to another . Now for choise of a fit calling , a childs best ability wherein especially it consisteth , whether in the exercise of minde or of body , is duly to be obserued : and also his inclination , to what calling he is most disposed . 4. Among fit callings ( for there may be many ) that which is best and the most excellent is to be preferred . To this purpose not vnfitly may I apply that of the Apostle , ccuet earnestly the best gifts . On this ground let parents be exhorted to traine vp such children as they finde fit , to the great and weighty calling of the ministery : no calling wherein any may doe more good , and wherein ( if they be able and faithfull Ministers ) they can receiue more comfort and contentment . This exhortation is the more to be regarded , because in comparison of those who are trained vp to other callings , so few are trained vp to this . § 33. Of parents faults contrary to their dutie of training their children vp to a calling . On the contrary , many parents much offend in not training vp their children to a calling as they should . And the offence in this kinde is committed many waies . As 1. When parents suffer their children to liue like little masters at home , and passe ouer all their youth in idlenesse . Thus they proue very drones , and caterpillars in the common wealth : if they haue a patrimony , they soone waste it : if they haue none , they oft proue either theeues or beggars : they are fit for all companies : the readiest prey for the deuill that can be : for they are like the house empty , swept and garnished , which when the euill spirit espieth , he presently entereth into it with seuen other spirits worse then himselfe . The wise law-maker among the heathen is said to order that the childe which by his parents had beene taught no Art , should not be forced to nourish them though they were old or poore . This I all eage not to iustifie the law ( for it is against the Christian rule of ouercomming euill with goodnesse ) but to shew how the very heathen iudged the neglect of this dutie a great fault in parents . 2. When parents neglect to teach their children in their child-hood the generall and common grounds of all callings : some vpon niggardlinesse ; others vpon carelesnesse . Thus poore men make their children vnfit for many meanes , whereby they might well maintaine themselues : and rich men make theirs vnfit for magistracy , and for good society . Yea poore and rich are thus nousled vp the more in ignorance , and made the more vnfit to profit by the preaching of the word , and other meanes of spirituall edification . 3. When parents bring vp their children in vnwarrantable and vnlawfull callings , as to be of popish and idolatrous orders ; to attend vpon papists ; to be stage-plaiers , keepers of dice-houses , &c. Some ( which is horrible to thinke of ) traine vp their daughters to be common strumpets : and some ( which is yet more horrible ) traine vp their children to be sorcerers and witches . How can they in these keepe a good conscience , when the very workes of their calling are sinne ? Is not this to thrust them headlong into hell ? They who thus binde their children to the deuils sacrileges are spirituall murtherers of them . 4. When parents haue no respect at all to the fitnesse of the calling : as when they traine vp children of able bodies , but dull and slow capacity , of a stuttering tongue and other like imperfections , to learning , wherein they proue very dunces , and lose all their time , or are not able to make vse of the learning which they haue : or when they traine vp children which haue a great inclination to learning , and are very fit thereunto , in some other trade , which , after many yeeres speut therein , they are forced to leaue . 5. When parents only seeke after the most gainfull trade , and neuer thinke to educate their children most to the honour of God. How can such expect Gods blessing vpon the meanes vsed for their childrens good ? Hence is it that among Papists so many are trained vp to Ecclesiasticall orders and functions : and so few among Protestants . For there is very great maintenance and reuenues for such among Papists : but little in comparison among Protestants : §. 34. Of parents teaching their children piety . The spirituall good of children , and that in their childhood , is to be procured by parents as well as their temporall . Wherefore Parents must traine vp their children in true piety . This is expresly commanded in my text vnder this phrase admonition of the Lord. Vnder the law God did both simply b command it , and that very often , and also ordained diuers outward c rites , and caused many visible and extraordinary d monuments to be set vp , that thereby children might be occasioned to aske of their parents the mysterie of them , and that parents from that inquirie of their children might take occasion to e teach them the ordinances of the Lord. This expresse charge of the Lord is further commended by that practise which holy parents from time to time haue yeelded thereunto : instance the examples of f Abraham , g Dauid , h Bathsheba , i Lois and Eunice , with many others . 1. Pietie is the best thing that a parent can teach his childe : for as reason maketh a man differ from a beast ; and as learning and ciuilitie maketh a wise and sober man differ from sauages and swaggerers ; so pietie maketh a sound Christian much more to differ from the most ciuill and well ordered naturall man that can be . Learning , ciuilitie , calling , portion , are all nothing without pietie . Now it is an especiall point of wisdome , to seeke the best good that we can , as for our selues , so also for our children : yea this is an euident signe of a parents true loue of his childe . 2. There is a necessitie that children be taught pietie , because they are not borne but made Christians : by nature they are vtterly destitute of all pietie : for by nature euery imagination of the thoughts of mans heart is only euill continually ( Gen. 6. 5. ) and in that respect man is borne like the wilde asse colt ( Iob 11. 12. ) so as a man were better be vnborne then not taught pietie . 3. The charge and office of parents bindeth them to teach their children pietie : for they are by God made watchmen ouer their children : if therefore their children liue and die in impietie through their parents negligence , their bloud shall be required at their parents hands : instance the example of k Elie. Obiect . This dutie appertaineth to Ministers . Answ . 1. God hath giuen an expresse charge hereof to parents , as we heard before . 2. In the familie a parent is all in all ouer his childe : a King , a Priest , and a Prophet . Therefore that which a Minister is to doe for matter of instruction in the Church , a parent must do at home . 3 Children haue need of daily instruction : the parents paines in this kinde must be added to the Ministers : and both are little enough . 4. Parents hauing more familiaritie with their children then Ministers , must needs better know their capacitie , and their disposition : and so may better know after what manner to instruct them : whether to giue them milke or strong meat , whether to deale mildly or roughly with them . 5. Instructions from parents are commonly more kindly accepted then from others : and children will the better rellish them , when they come from their parents . They say that a plant will best grow in the soile out of which it first sprung : so instructions comming from those who both brought vs forth , and first brought vs vp , are like to doe most good . 6. There is no such meanes to breed loue in a childs heart , as to be an instrument of bringing piety thereinto . Now who should more seeke the true loue of a childe then a parent ? In this respect a parent is more bound to this dutie then a Minister . 7. It is impossible , that a Minister , who , it may be , hath many hundred children vnder his charge , should well instruct them all : It is therefore requisite , that each parent looke to his owne children . As these distinct answers satisfie the obiection , so they serue as so many more reasons to inforce the dutie : wherefore to proceed in adding other reasons , 4. Great equitie there is that parents teach their children piety , because they p conceiued and brought them forth in iniquitie . If they suffer them to lie and die in that corrupt estate , they are more cruell then the Ostrich and Dragon . 5. Children are most properly Gods : q borne to God : he is the most proper parent of them : in comparison of God , fathers and mothers of the flesh are but nurses . They must therefore nurture them in the admonition of the Lord. 6. Pietie is that , which of all other things , will make the childe most obedient , and gratefull to his parents : for thus there is a double bond to binde him : 1. his birth . 2. his new birth : especially when the cause of the one hath beene also the cause of the other . 7. Nothing can more settle the heart of a wise parent on his death-bed concerning his children , then assurance that pietie is planted in them : for then may he with stronger confidence commend them to Gods prouidence , and with greater assurance expect his blessing vpon them after he is dead . 8. Parents , by teaching their children pietie , are an especiall meanes of propagating true religion from age to age , and from generation to generation . No better meanes can be thought of . For if all parents were carefull of their dutie in this kinde , as there is a succession of children , and thereby a preseruation of mankinde , so there would be a succession of those that feare God , and thereby a preseruation of true religion . My children that are taught by me , may be fathers of children , and so teach that to their children , which they haue learned of me : yea after them may grand-children proue fathers of other children , and they teach their children the same , and so from age to age others after them . This is the meanes on our part : and in our time we must doe our part : and for those who come after vs , leaue the issue to God. Not only the great benefit of this point , but also the too much neglect thereof , in most families , hath moued me the longer to insist on it , and the more forcibly to presse it . For the better performing thereof , I will adde some directions . §. 35. Of directing parents how to teach their children true pietie . 1. Whatsoeuer principle of pietie , parents doe teach their children , they must be sure that it be grounded on Gods word : thus much this phrase ( admonition of the Lord ) implieth . Thus shall parents be sure to feed them with good wholesome spirituall food , such as shall make to their spirituall nourishment , and eternall life . In this respect principles of religion grounded on Gods word are called sound , or wholsome , or healthfull words : and that both in regard of their matter and substance , and also in regard of their effect ; they cause and preserue good , sound , spirituall health . We know that naturall men haue a care to giue their children such food as is wholsome for their bodie : ( for will a father that is euill , giue his childe a stone , or a serpent , and not that which is good ? ) Conscience must moue religious parents , to haue the like care of the soules of their children , as nature teacheth all parents to haue of their bodies . If parents be carefull to draw those principles , wherein they instruct their children , out of Gods word , they shall be sure not to poyson their soules with any error , heresie , superstition , or idolatrie . 2. When children begin to read , let them read the holy Scripture : so was Timothie trained vp from a childe ( 2 Tim. 3. 15. ) Thus will children sucke in religion with learning : for there is a secret vertue lurking in the holy Scripture ( which is Gods owne word ) more then in any bookes of men : so as through Gods blessing there may by this meanes be an inward worke of grace in children euen in their young yeeres . Besides , no bookes are more easie then many parts of Scripture ; and no histories more admirable and delightfull , then the histories of the Scripture . It is the aduice of an ancient Father , that young children be made acquainted with the words and names of holy Scripture : and that , in stead of tales and fables , choice histories of the Bible be made knowne to them : and that they be instructed in the Prouerbs of Solomon . 3. Let children be catechised constantly from day to day : rehearse them continually vnto thy children , saith the Law. That which is daily done , is in Scripture said to be done continually : as the sacrifice which was daily offered was called a continuall offering . Here let this caueat be noted , that in giuing this spirituall food , parents deale with their children , as skilfull nurses and mothers doe in feeding infants : they will not at once cram more into their mouthes , then their stomach is able to digest , but they will rather oft feed them with a little : so it is not meet , that parents be too tedious ; that will but dull a childs vnderstanding , and breed wearisomnesse , and make it loath to be againe instructed : but precept vpon precept , precept vpon precept , line vpon line , line vpon line , here a little , and there a little . Thus shall they learne with case and delight : and this being oft performed , in time a great measure of knowledge will be gained thereby . If a vessell haue a little mouth , we vse not to fill it by powring whole paile-fuls vpon it , for so all may be spilt , and it receiue little or nothing : but we let the liquor fall in by little and little , according to the capacitie of the mouth ; so is nothing lost , and the vessell filled the sooner . Thus are children to be dealt withall . 4. To the set times of catechizing children , let other occasions of teaching them pietie be added : as at table , by resembling the spirituall food of their soules , to that corporall food , whereby their bodies are nourished : when they are walking abroad , by shewing them the starres , how they remaine stedfast in their course ; the trees , how they bring forth fruit in their season ; how all things are for the vse and benefit of man , and thereupon make spirituall vses : note the direction which for this purpose the Law giueth to parents , Thou shall talke to thy children of my words , when thou sittest in thine house , and when thou walkest by the way , and when thou liest downe , and when thou risest vp . 5. Let parents open to their children the mysteries of those outward rites which God hath ordained in his Church , as of Preaching , Baptising children , administring the Lords Supper , ceasing from worke on the Lords day , with the like . This was expresly commanded vnder the law . Visible rites are great helpes to the weake vnderstanding of children , when they are plainly opened and applied : yea they are also especiall meanes of keeping in memory the mysteries contained vnder them : as course threds or wiars are meanes to preserue pearles put vpon them . So oft as they see the rites they will be put in minde of the mysteries implied vnder them . 6. To this may be referred a declaration of such great and admirable workes as God in former times hath done for his Church : especially such workes as haue beene done in their time : and if any memorials be remaining of them , make them knowne to children . This direction was also giuen vnder the law , concerning the monuments which were set vp of the great deliuerances that God gaue to his people . In particular when the day of the gunpowder-treason is solemnized , parents ought to teach their children the occasion of solemni●ing that day . And as God doth any great workes of mercy ●r of iudgement , point them out to children . When there is great famine , plague , or any mortality , instruct children in ●he causes thereof : when victory , plenty , peace , or the like , ●ach children from whence these come . Outward sensible things doe best worke vpon children . 7. Let religious schoole masters be chosen for children : so●●ewise other masters to whom children are put forth : and religious houses where they are placed . Hannah commended ●er first borne childe to old Eli , a good , religious high Priest . ● 〈◊〉 ● masters themselues be religious , there is good hope that they will instruct in piety such as are vnder them : which if they ●oe , what an helpe will that be to parents ? If both parents and masters ioyne therein , it must needs be very profitable to ●e children . If parents should faile , yet might masters make a ●ood supply . 8. Let parents be to their children a good patterne and example in pietie . I and my house ( saith a Iosua ) will serue the Lord : he setteth himselfe first as a guide to the rest . b I will walke in mine house with a perfect heart , saith Dauid , whereby he would make himselfe an example , as to others of his family , so to his children . Example is a reall instruction , and addeth a sharpe edge to admonition . Much more shall a religious parent doe by practise then by precept . For children are much inclined to follow their parents : let them goe before , children will soone follow after . Practise is an euident proofe of the necessitie of the precept deliuered . §. 36. Of Parents faults contrary to their dutie of teaching their children piety . Many are the aberrations contrary to the forenamed care of teaching pietie . For 1. Most parents care only for the temporall and ciuill good of their children : so their children may be well fed and clothed , and brought vp in some profitable calling , whereby they may well maintaine themselues in this world , little thought is had , or care taken for their spirituall life in this world , or eternall life in the world to come . Wherein are these parents better then heathen ? Iob was otherwise minded : he was more carefull for their soules then for their bodies . 2. Many are so farre from teaching piety , as they teach their children profanenesse , pride , riot , lying , deceit , and such like principles of the deuill . It had beene better for such children to haue liued among wilde beasts , then vnder such parents . As the children hereby are thrust headlong to hell , so their blood shall be required of their parents . 3. Others thinke it enough that their children be taught a religion , but what religion it skilleth not . Such are they as hauing rich kindred but popish , commend their children to the education of such kindred , in hope of some temporall benefit , that their children may reape from them . If they were as carelesse of their childrens bodies , they would be accounted little better then murtherers : and is not the soule more pretious then the body ? 4. So farre are many from catechising their children and that daily , as they teach them not so much as the Lords praier , the Beleefe , and the ten Commandements . Wherein Papists shall rise vp in iudgement against them , that are very diligent in teaching their children , Pater noster , Aue Maria , and such like Latine principles , as the children cannot possibly vnderstand . 5. Few vse the forenamed outward helpes , as the holy rites appointed of God , the great and glorious workes of God , his extraordinary workes of mercy or iudgement , to instruct their children thereby . As they themselues care not to take notice of any such thing , so they care not whether their children doe it or no. 6. So much doe some preferre a little pelfe before the true good of their children , as they care not to what schoolemaster they put their children , be he profane , or popish , or vnlearned , especially if he be a kinsman , or one of their friends . Few will so doe in case of their health or outward estate : but will rather get the best Physitian , or the best Lawyer that they can . Children oft learne such euill qualities of their schoolemasters as they can neuer shake off againe . 7. Many proue very bad patternes to their children , and giue very ill example by profanensse , riotousnesse , swearing , drinking , playing at vnlawfull games , &c. These parents as they brought forth their children in sinne , so they lead them on forward to hell . Their euill example is not only an hinderance to the good instruction of others , but also maketh all their owne counsells ( if at any time they doe giue any good counsell ) to be in vaine : for the left hand of euill example soone pulleth downe more then the right hand of instruction can build againe . To conclude , those parents whose children are not brought vp in the instruction of the Lord , shew plainly that they regard neither the saluation or damnation of their soules . §. 37. Of instructing children so soone as they are capable . Hitherto of the Kindes of nurture . The Time thereof followeth . In handling the time of good nurture , I wil shew 1. When it ought to be begun . 2. How long it ought to be continued   1. Parents ought to begin to nurture their children so soone as they are capable of any instruction . Euen as young birds are taught by their dammes to flie so soone as their wings can carry them . b Traine vp a childe ( saith Solomon ) that is , while he is young and tender : and againe , c He that loueth his childe nurtureth him be times . Thus was Samuel sent when he was very young to be trained vp vnder Eli , ( 1 Sam. 1. 24. ) and Solomon was instructed by his father when he was tender , ( Pro. 4. 3. ) and Timothy was taught the Scriptures d from a young childe , or infant . There are both priuatiue , and positiue reasons to presse this point . Priuatiue , in regard of the mischiefes that may be preuented thereby . Positiue , in regard of the good that may be gained thereby . 1. Many are the euils which children by nature are prone vnto , euen as ranke ground is subiect to bring forth many weeds : for e the imagination of mans heart is euill from his youth : and f foolishnesse is bound in the heart of a childe . If therefore they be not well nurtured betimes , what can be looked for , but the fruits of euill , and folly . But timely nurture will preuent such fruits , and be an excellent preseruatiue against their owne naturall corruption , against Satans temptations and against the allurements or discouragements of the world 2. Continuance in euill maketh children obstinate , and inflexible therein . Elies sonnes being suffered to goe on in wickednesse till they came to ripenesse of yeeres , would not afterwards harken to the voice of their Father . What creature can be tamed , if it be not begun with while it is young ? 3. When children first begin to be capable of instruction they are most pliable to follow the direction of their parents as is euident by the ordinary course of nature in all things Clay , wax , and such other things while they are soft receiue any impression : twigs while they are tender are bowed any way : birds and beasts are easily tamed when they are young : corne sowne betimes bringeth a timely and plentifull haruest . 4. That which in childhood is learned , is longest retained : Traine vp a childe in the way he should goe , and when he is old he will not depart from it . A vessell longest keepeth that sauour with which at first it is seasoned : and by experience we may note old men best to remember the things which in their childhood they learned : yea by well educating children from their infancy much labour may afterwards be spared : for constant vse of vertue bringeth it vnto a law . Obiect . To teach children while they are young , is but as to teach a Parrot or such like vnreasonable creatures : they may learne what is taught them , but they cannot conceiue it . 1. Answ . Though children haue not so deepe an apprehension while they are young , as they haue when they come to riper yeares , yet so soone as they are capable of instruction , they doe much better conceiue what is taught them , then vnreasonable creatures can doe . 2. Though that were granted , yet it would not thereupon follow , that it is better not to be taught while they are young . For , first it is better that they should be framed and squared to a good course , before they can discerne betwixt good and euill , ●hen be suffered to runne on in euill , till they get an habit ●herein ; which after it is got , will hardly be cast off . Secondly , by teaching them before they can well conceiue , their apprehension is much helped . What may be the reason that ●hildren of kings , and great men are commonly of more vnderstanding at 12. or 14. yeares of age , then poore and meane ●ens children at 17. or 18. but that they are sooner , and beter instructed ? Thirdly , as by age their vnderstanding commeth to more and more ripenesse , they will more and more ●●nceiue that which at first they did not so well vnderstand . Then schollers first learne their Latine rules , they learne them ●eerely by rote , without vnderstanding the meaning of them , ●t afterwards come to make very good vse of them . Where●● children are to be instructed betimes euen for the benefit at may be after reaped , as corne is sowne in winter to receiue ●●op the haruest following : and to preuent the mischiefes at may fall out , lest they get head ouer their parents against ●ir minde . §. 38. Of mothers peculiar care in nurturing young children . By the way let mothers especially note this point of timely nurture , as a point in peculiar appertaining to them . The b grandmother Lois , and mother Eunice , first taught Timothy , c Bathsheba taught Salomon when he was young . Oft doth Salomon warne children d not to forsake their mothers teaching . Whereby he implieth that mothers should teach their children especially while they are young : which duty so belongeth to a mother , as e Salomon laieth the blame , and shame of the neglect thereof vpon her : on the other side the honour of well nurturing children redoundeth especially to the mother . To this purpose is it , that the f particular names of the mothers of the kings are recorded in Scripture : intimating thereby that mothers were a maine cause of the piety , or impiety of such children . Salomon and Absolom had both one father , but diuers mothers . May we not well thinke that Salomons mothers care to instruct him was an especiall meanes of his piety : and that Absoloms mothers neglect of this duty , was some cause of his impiety ? It is expresly noted of Ahaziahs mother , that she was his counseller to doe wickedly , which made him so wicked as he was . Home-experience confirmeth as much : for if father and mother be of diuers religions , most of the children will follow the mother . For while children are young , their mother is most in their sight : she feedeth , she apparelleth them , she tendeth them when they are not well , ( when the Shunemites childe being ill , said to his father , my head , my head , he said to his seruant , carrie him to his mother . ) Her precepts therefore and practise in that respect are best heeded by the children , and she hath the best opportunity to perswade them to what she liketh best : so as what they learne in their younger yeares , commonly they learne of their mothers : and that which then they learne , for the most part sticketh most close vnto them , and is longest retained by them , as was noted * before . I haue not thus in particular pressed this point vpon mothers , as if I exempted fathers from all care of nurturing their children in the beginning : for in my text the Apostle named Fathers : and Salomon saith , that his father taught him eue● while he was tender : and Dauid felt the smart of neglecting hi● other children . It is therefore ( as hath before beene proued ) a ioynt duty belonging to both . Fathers therefore must doe their best endeuour , and see that mothers doe theirs also , because he is a gouernour ouer child , mother , and all . §. 39. Of letting slip the best time for nurture . Contrary is the negligence of most parents , who let the best yeares wherein their children are most docible passe ouer in wantonnesse , vanity , and folly : and so lose that which can neuer be recouered againe , most precious time . Hence is it that when they goe about to reclaime their children , they finde them exceedingly peruerse and head-strong : much like to a strong bigge arme of a tree , which if a man goe about to straiten , he cannot easily make it bow : and though it bow , yet will it not continue to stand as he would haue it : nay it may be that it will rather breake then bow much . Such a branch was Adoniah . It is apparent that in his childhood he was not well nurtured , for his father would not displease him from his childhood . The fathers putting off this duty to the mother , and the mothers putting it off to the father , is a great cause of the neglect thereof . Were both of them perswaded that it belonged to them both , and in that respect would to their power be helpfull each to other , children would much better be instructed . §. 40. Of parents continuing to nurture their children . As parents must begin betimes to nurture their children , so they must hold on therein , as long as they retaine any gouernment ouer them : yea so long as they remaine to be parents vnto them . Some difference there may be in the manner of performing this duty : for children are to be vsed as children : and they who are growne in yeares , and of riper vnderstanding , accordingly to be dealt withall : yet still must parents haue a care of their well doing . The word vsed in my text and translated Children , is a generall word which in Scripture and other writers is vsed to set forth all sort of children , of what sexe , of what age , of what degree soeuer they be . In handling the duty of children we * shewed , that children owed a subiection to parents so long as they liued together : wherefore by the rule of relation , so long also an authority remaineth in parents ouer their children , and accordingly they ought to haue a fatherly care for their good . On this ground Eli did well in admonishing his children after they were maried : his fault was that he went not farre enough in doing his duty : somewhat he did , but not all that he should and might haue done . Iob is commended for the care he had ouer his children when they were growne in yeares : for day by day he sent for them and sanctified them : and that after they had seuerall houses of their owne , and dwelt apart : and this all their daies . For the performance of that which is now vrged , parents must so carrie themselues from time to time towards their children , as they euer keepe the reines in their owne hands , and retaine a power to curbe their children as they see occasion . They may , as their children grow vp in yeares , slaken the reines more and more , but neuer let them cleane goe , and cast them loose on their childrens necke . §. 41. Of parents folly in letting goe all their power ouer their children . Contrary is their folly who put themselues in their childrens power , and let goe all their authority ouer them . Many parents that haue thus done , hauing by wofull experience found the mischiefe and inconuenience that hath followed thereupon , haue much repented their folly , and vsed meanes of redresse , but all too late . For a mischiefe is much more easily preuented then redressed . All the power that Dauid had could not hold in Absolom after he was permitted to haue horses , and chariots , and men at his command . If Dauid , as he begun , had continued to keepe him within a compasse , and still held him vnder , all the treasonable plots which he put in execution , might easily haue beene preuented . Our times afford too many examples of parents folly in this kinde , and of the mischiefes following thereupon . Of Time of nurture thus farre . The meanes thereof follow . §. 42. Of adding admonition to instruction . The meanes of helping forward the good worke of nurture are especially two . 1. Frequent admonition . 2. Due correction . Both of them are implied in this text : one in the word translated admonition , which ( according to the notation of the Greeke word ) is a putting of a thing into the mind , an vrging and pressing of it : the other in the word translated nurture . Now both these are to be ioyned together , as being very helpfull each to other . For admonition without correction is like to proue but meere vanity : and correction without admonition will be too much austerity . The dutie which the first of these setteth forth , is this , Parents must oft whet instruction vpon their children : they may not thinke it enough to tell their children what they ought to doe , but to instruction they must adde admonition : and , as it were , beat into their childrens heads the lessons which they teach them : that so they may make a deeper impression in their hearts . Thus shall their instructions be like the words of the wise which are as nailes fastened , or fast knocked in : they remain firme where they are once fastened , and cannot easily be pluckt out : for as many blowes doe knocke a naile vp to the head ( as we speake ) so many admonitions doe settle good instructions in a childes heart , and cause that the heart be established in that which is taught , e which is a thing to be laboured after . The generall exhortation of being f instant in season and out of season may be applied to this purpose : but more pertinently that g direction which is in particular giuen to parents of whetting Gods words vpon their children . To this purpose is it that Solomon vseth to double his instructions , and vrge them againe and againe , as h heare the instruction , forsake not the law : i receiue my words , hide my commandements within thee : incline thine eares , apply thy heart , &c. yea of the repeateth the very same precepts . The apprehension of children is fickle , and their memory weake : if they be but once , or seldome , or sleightly instructed , that which is taught will soone slip away , and doe little or no good . For the better performing of this dutie , parents must thinke of the best meanes they can to fasten their instructions vpon their children : and obserue their inclination and disposition , and see with what they are most moued . Constant exhortations , and powerfull perswasions are comprised vnder admonition , which in their kindes , as occasion requireth , are to be vsed . §. 43. Of parents wearisomnesse in instructing their children . Contrary is the practise of those parents who soone waxe weary in instructing their children . The Apostle laieth it downe as a generall caueat in good duties that we wax not weary : if in no good thing we must wax weary , shall parents wax weary in doing good to their children ? Yet how many be there that hauing once taught their children , thinke they haue done dutie enough in that kinde : if their children will take it , they may . They are loth to take too much paines in often vrging the points which they haue taught them . Thus that teaching vanisheth away : and so it falleth out , as we say in the prouerbe , as good not at all as neuer the better . This is one point wherein old Eli failed : for he gaue very good instruction to his children : but because he there staied , neither was that accepted of God as a sufficient discharge of his duty , nor were his children any whit bettered thereby . If this were a fault in him notwithstanding his children were come to yeares of discretion , and to ripenesse of vnderstanding , how much greater is the fault in those whose children are but young ? Obiect . If a childe take not instruction at first , he is but of an vntoward and peruerse disposition : all the paines that can be taken will be lost . Answ . It may be childishnesse rather then peruersnesse , or some imperfection , rather then obstinacy . Considering the necessity of good nurture , no paines may be thought too much . There is more peruersenesse , and vntowardnesse i● such parents as wax weary in doing this dutie , then in such children as at first are not wrought vpon : for this is a means ordained of God to cure this vntowardnesse . §. 44. Of parents reprouing their children . The other meanes of helping nurture is correction . Which is of two sorts ; Verball , by Words . Reall ,   Blowes .   The former is reprehension : and it must alwaies goe before the latter , which is most vsually and properly called Correction . Reprehension is a kinde of middle thing betwixt admonition and correction : it is a sharpe admonition , but a milde correction . It is the rather to be vsed because it may be a meanes to preuent strokes and blowes , especially in ingenuous , and good natured children ( for b a reproofe entereth more into him that is wise , then a hundred stripes into a foole ) and because it may be vsed , when it is not so meet to vse strokes and blowes : as when children are growne to man-age . The many good fruits which the holy Ghost noteth to proceed from due reproofe doe shew that it is a dutie whereof parents ought to make conscience as they desire to promote the good of their children : and so much the rather because many good fruits redound to the parents that reproue , as well as to the children reproued . In regard of their good who are reproued , it is said , c Reproofes for instruction are the way of life : they cause d vnderstanding ; and make e prudent . In regard of their good who reproue , it is said , f To them that rebuke shall be delight ( that is , much comfort and matter of reioycing , so as they shall not need to repent what they haue done ) and a blessing of good shall come vpon them , that is , either a blessing of good men , who will blesse , praise and commend them : or a blessing of good things , and that from the Lord who will reward them for this conscionable performance of their dutie . Vpon these grounds g holy men haue not spared to rebuke their children as there was occasion . Though h Eli did somewhat in this duty , yet because he was not more seuere therein , ●he brought destruction both vpon himselfe and his children . The direction noted § . 40. and 47. and Treat . 4. § . 35. may be here applied . §. 45. Of parents cockering their children . Contrary is their too much doting on children , who are ●oth to giue them a foule word . Dauid ( though otherwise a ●very wise man ) herein manifested much folly , for he displeased ●ot Adoniah at any time in saying , why hast thou done so ? and like enough it is , that also he so cockered his other rebellious sonne Absolom . Note the fearefull issue that followed thereupon both to father and children . Though their father would not displease them , yet they cared not to displease their father , yea to grieue his heart , and vex his soule . The like may all foolish doting parents looke for at their childrens hands . For first parents by neglect of this dutie highly displease God : therefore in iust reuenge will God giue their children ouer to displease and vex them . Secondly , neglect of reproofe is a meanes to make children rude , presumptuous , rebellious , and so carelesse to please their parents . Yea all things where in children offend through want of education shall be required at their parents hands . §. 46. Of correcting children . The latter and more proper kinde of correction which is by stripes and blowes is also a meanes appointed by God to helpe the good nurture and education of children . It is the last remedy which a parent can vse : a remedy which may doe good when nothing else can . It is by the holy Ghost both expresly commanded , and also very oft pressed vnder these and such like phrases , b Ch●sten thy sonne : c correct thy sonne : d with-hold not correction from the childe : e thou shalt smite him with the rod. Were there no other motiue , this were sufficient . Gods charge was such a motiue to Abraham , as at it he would haue sacrificed his sonne : and wilt not thou at Gods command correct thy childe ? It is further commended by Gods owne example , which is not only set forth in some particular instances , but by his generall constant dealing with all , and that as an especiall token and fruit of his loue . For whom the Lord loueth he chasteneth , and scourgeth euery sonne whom he receiueth . If ye be without chastisement wherof all are partakers , then are ye bastards and not sonnes . Let this example of God be well weighed , for it is of great weight . Who can better tell what kinde of dealing is fittest for children then God ? Who can better nurture children then God ? Who doth more truly aime at , and procure the good of children then God ? Yea who doth more tender children then God ? If God the father of spirits in wisdome and loue thus deale with his children , fathers of the flesh may not thinke by the contrary to shew wisdome or loue . Their wisdome will be folly , their loue hatred . Vpon these grounds it is taken for a thing granted , that parents ( who tender the good of their children as they should ) doe chastise their children as need requireth : for it is said , that the h Lord correcteth whom he loueth , as a father the sonne in whom he delighteth . If parents vsed it not , this were no good inference to say , as a father : againe , as a thing without controuersie it is said , i we haue had fathers of our flesh which corrected vs. The grounds of the equitie of this dutie , respect partly the children corrected , and partly the parents that correct . In regard of children , it freeth them from much euill , and worketh in them much good . Correction is as physicke to purge out much corruption which lurketh in children , and as a salue to heale many wounds and sores made by their folly . In which respect Solomon saith , that k Foolishnesse is bound in the heart of a childe , but the rod of correction shall driue it farre from him : and againe , l The blewnesse of a wound is a purging medicine against euill : so doe stripes the inward parts of the belly . In regard of the inward operation of this physicke , correction is further said to preserue a childe from death , ( m if thou beatest him he shall not die ) and that not only from temporall death ( as many children are thus preserued from the Magistrates sword ) but also from eternall death ( n thou shalt deliuer his soule from hell . ) Note this ye cockering parents , whose ouer-much lenitie is very great crueltie . For may we not iustly count him a cruell parent , that should suffer diseases , boiles , sores , and wounds to remaine , increase , and fester in his childe , and giue him no physicke , nor apply any plaisters , or medicines to him ? Nay rather who seeth his sonne running into a flaming fire , or deepe water , and would not hold him backe ? Euen so cruell , and more cruell are they , who suffer their children to runne on in euill , rather then correct them . Obiect . Who can endure to make his owne childe smart , and to put him to paine ? Answ . The future fruit is more to be considered , then the present paine . Potions , pills , and corasiues , are fulsome , bitter , and painfull ; but because there is a necessitie of vsing them , and great mischiefe is preuented by the vse of them , wise parents will not forbeare them for the sensible bitternesse , and paine . Fitly doth the Apostle thus answer that obiection , No chastning for the present seemeth to be ioyous , but grieuous ; neuerthelesse , afterward it yeeldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousnesse . This may be applied to parents corrections as well as to Gods. The good which correction bringeth to children , is by Solomon noted in this and such like phrases , The rod giueth wisdome : for it maketh children obserue , what is good , and what euill ; what commendable , and what blame-worthy : and accordingly to doe the good , and leaue the euill , which is a great point of wisdome . Obiect . Instruction will better doe this . Answ . Instruction may giue them more knowledge , but it is correction which bringeth them to practise what they know , which is the q chiefest point of wisdome . In regard of parents , due correcting of their children both freeth them of many inconueniences , and also bringeth to them much quiet . 1. It spareth them much paines . For many admonitions oft repeated , and inculcated againe and againe , will not make many children so much to heed wholsome and good aduice , as a little correction . They are much more sensible of smart , then of words . 2. It preuenteth much griefe , shame , and vexation : for r a foolish sonne is a griefe to his father , and bitternesse to her that bare him . But it is ſ the rod of correction that driueth away foolishnesse , and so preuenteth that griefe and bitternesse . 3. It freeth them from the guilt of their childrens sinne , so as they are not accessarie thereto , as t Eli was . For correction is the last remedie that a parent can vse : if by that he can doe no good , it is presupposed that he hath done his vttermost endeuour : in which respect , though the childe die in his sinne , yet the parent hath deliuered his owne soule . The quiet which is brought to parents by correcting their children , is thus noted out by Solomon , u Correct thy sonne , and he shall giue thee rest , yea he shall giue delight vnto thy soule . For children well nurtured , and by correction kept in a filiall awe , will so carrie themselues , as their parents may rest somewhat secure , and not disquiet themselues ( as they doe with children set at libertie ) yea , as trees well pruned , and ground well tilled , they will bring forth pleasant and abundant fruit ; and so their parents will haue iust cause to reioyce in them . §. 47. A direction to parents in correcting their children . For well vsing this biting corasiue of correction , parents must haue respect to the matter for which they doe correct , and to their manner of correcting . In regard of the matter , these three things must be noted . 1. That they be sure there is a fault committed : that so there be iust cause of correcting : else more hurt then good will proceed from thence . If a corasiue be laid where there is no sore , it will make one . If correction be vniustly giuen , it may prouoke to wrath , but will doe little good . This is it wherein earthly fathers are taxed , and made vnlike to God , for that many times they correct after their owne pleasure : which is a point of great iniustice . 2. That the fault be made knowne to the childe corrected : and he apparantly conuinced thereof . Correction must be for instruction , which cannot be , except the childe know why he is corrected : for it is all one to him , as if he were corrected for no fault , if he know not his fault . God thus a first proceeded with the serpent , with Eue , and with Adam . Thus Iudges proceed in punishing malefactors . Yea thus will men deale with a dog . Should they not much more with a childe ? 3. That the faults be such especially , as the parents can shew to their children ( if at least they be of so much discretion ) to be against Gods word ; as swearing , lying , pilfring , and the like : for 1. these are most dangerous faults , and therefore more carefully to be purged out . 2. the childe corrected will thus be the better euicted of his fault , the more condemne himselfe , and more contentedly beare the correction . In regard of the manner of correcting , foure generall , and foure particular rules are to be obserued . The generall rules are these . 1. An eye must be had to Gods manner of correcting his children , and in particular of Gods correcting the parent himselfe : no better generall direction can be giuen : for Gods patterne is a perfect rule . 2. Prayer must be made by parents for themselues and for their children : for themselues , to be directed in doing it : for their children , to be bettered by it . Thus will good Physitians in ministring physicke . In all duties is prayer to be vsed ; especially in this : for a parent is ready , partly through his owne intemperate passion , and partly through the childs impatiencie , to fall into one extreme or other . This is not to impose vpon all , whensoeuer they take vp the rod , to goe and make a solemne prayer , but to lift vp the heart for direction and blessing . 3. Correction must be giuen in loue . All things must be done in loue : much more this , that carieth a shew of anger and hatred . In loue they will giue physicke to their children , and splinter a ioynt , if need be . God correcteth his children in loue : so must parents . Loue will make them doe it with tendernesse and compassion . 4. Correction must be giuen in a milde moode , when the affections are well ordered , and not distempered with choler , rage , furie , and other like passions . Disturbed passions cast a mist before the vnderstanding , so as a man cannot discerne what is enough , what too much . When passion is moued , correction must be deferred . God correcteth in measure . The particular rules are these . 1. Due order must be kept . Correction by word must goe before correction by the rod. b I rebuke and chasten , saith the Lord. Thus a parent will shew that he taketh no delight in smiting his childe : it is necessitie that forceth him thereunto . Thus a parent sheweth himselfe like to God , who doth not punish willingly , Lam. 3. 33. Physitians , when they minister strong physicke , will giue a preparatiue : rebuke may be as a preparatiue . Good and pitifull Chirurgions will try all other meanes before they come to launce and seere . 2. Due respect must be had to the partie corrected : if he be young and tender , the lighter correction must be vsed . Solomon oft mentioneth a rod , as meetest for a childe ; for that is the lightest correction . So if the childe be of a flexible and ingenuous disposition , soone sneapt , the correction must accordingly be moderated . If he be well growne , and withall be stout , and stubborne , the correction may be more seuere . 3. Due respect must be had to the fault : Sinnes directly against God , open , notorious , scandalous sinnes , knowne sinnes , sinnes often committed , in which they are growne vp , and whereof they haue gotten an habit , are with greater seueritie to be corrected . 4. A parent must behold his owne faults in correcting his childes : so more compassion will be wrought in him . §. 48. Of parents too much indulgency . Contrary to this dutie of correcting are two extremes . 1. Too much lenitie . 2. Too much seueritie . Many so cocker their children , as they will suffer them to run into any misdemeanour , rather then correct them . They cannot endure to heare their children cry : and therefore their children must be pleased in all their humours and euill desires . These parents bring shame to themselues , and mischiefe vpon their children : for God is oft forced to correct such . Heauy are Gods corrections : and oft light on parent and childe both : as appeareth by the iudgement on Eli and his sonnes : for such parents make themselues accessary to their childrens sinnes : yea also to the iudgements laid vpon their children . God saith of such parents , that they honour their children aboue God. It is therefore a fond indulgency which maketh parents regard neither Gods honour , nor their owne or childrens safetie . Mothers for the most part offend herein , who are so farre from performing this dutie themselues , as they are much offended with their husbands if they doe it . And to proclaime their folly to all the world , they cannot commit their children to a Tutor or Schoole-master , but with a strait charge , that they correct them not . Obiect . Correction maketh children sots and blocks . Answ . If Gods spirit deserue to haue more credence then such foolish women , that obiection is most false , for we heard * before how correction giueth wisdome , and driueth out foolishnesse . 2. Obiect . Mothers may be the more borne with herein , because with long trouble they did beare , and with great trauell bring forth their children . Answ . That may be a good motiue for them to seeke the true good of their children , that so their trouble and trauell may not be in vaine : but not to vphold them in the broad way that leadeth to destruction . §. 49. Of parents too much seueritie in correcting their children . They who offend in the other extreme of seuerity , of the two are the more vnnaturall parents ; they offend directly against the first branch of this text ( Prouoke not to wrath . ) Nothing more prouoketh then immoderate seuerity : for 1. It argueth no loue in the parent , but rather hatred , at least wrath , and other such like distempered affections . 2. It softeneth not the childes heart , but hardeneth it rather . 3. It maketh him dull , and stupid , and cleane peruerteth the right and true end of correction . 4. It oft maketh a childe thinke of doing some mischiefe to his parent or himselfe . That parents may the rather take heed of this extreme , I will briefly note wherein excesse in seueritie is shewed . It is shewed , when correction is giuen 1. For no fault . In this case , though correction be neuer so light , it is too seuere . 2. For small faults , in wrath and furie , though the stripes be few and light , yet the parents behauiour is too much seueritie . 3. To children that are young and tender , or soft , milde and ingenuous , as if they were in some yeeres , the most obstinate and peruerse that could be . 4. Too often : for euery thing done amisse : whereas parents should seeme not to see or heare many things which they see , and heare . 5. Too sorely : so as the childe is lamed , or some way so hurt as he shall feele it as long as he liueth . §. 50. Of Parents care in prouiding fit callings for their children . Hauing laid downe such duties of parents as especially respect the childhood of children , I proceed to lay forth such as haue respect to their riper yeeres wherein they are to be placed forth . Here we are to note 1. The kindes of those duties . 2. The meanes of performing them .   The kindes may be drawne to two heads . 1. Prouiding fit places and callings for them to exercise their gifts . 2. Prouiding fit mariages for them . We heard * before how children were to be trained vp , and fitted to some good calling euen in their childhood . Now further , when by vertue of good education they are inabled to discharge the functions and duties of a calling , and by yeeres they are well growne vp , so as it is time they should be set to some particular calling : Parents ought to prouide fit callings for their children , and fit places for them to exercise the gifts which by nature or education they haue gotten . For example , If children haue beene brought vp in learning , parents must vse what lawfull and honest meanes they can to settle them in such a place and course as they may professe and exercise their gifts , according to their seuerall kindes , be it Diuinitie , Law , Physicke , or the like : or if they haue beene brought vp in any trade , to prouide that they may set vp ( as we speake ) and exercise their trade . The two first children that euer were borne of woman , a Cain and Abel , were placed forth in seuerall callings ; and without doubt their places were so ordered by their parents . The like may be gathered out of these phrases , b Esau was a man of the field , and Iaakob dwelt intents . c It is noted of Samuel , that he made his two sonnes Iudges . Had they beene as faithfull in well vsing their places , as their father was carefull in prouiding them , they might haue liued well themselues , and done much good to others . Ishai hauing many sonnes , had a care hereof : for d he sent his three eldest sonnes to the war ; and placed them in a souldiers course of life : e his youngest he made a shepheard , which was in those daies and places a calling of greater reckoning then now it is with vs. 1. Thus shall they make vse of that abilitie whereunto by their parents prouidence , and their owne diligence they haue attained : otherwise that abilitie may soone be lost . Doth not daily experience shew that many who haue beene well trained vp by their parents in learning , so farre as they haue beene fit to haue entred into the ministerie , for want of place and imploiment , haue in time so forgotten all , as if they had neuer beene trained vp in learning : and so in other sciences . 2. Thus come they to doe much more good in Church or Common-wealth : till men be placed in distinct callings , they are but fitting and preparing for future times . I denie not but that both Church and Common-wealth may reape much benefit by the paines and labour of the younger sort , who are trained vp vnder others : but most properly are they counted members of the Church and Common-wealth , and actuall instruments of the good thereof , who haue some particular distinct calling , whereby they doe good to others . 3. Thus they come to liue of themselues , and to be able to releeue others also . All the time of their education , they are commonly at the charge of others : at least , though by their paines they may gaine much , yet the gaine returnes to others : they themselues for the most part haue but a bare maintenance , meat , drinke and cloth ( as we say : ) little haue they to lay vp for themselues for the time to come , or to giue to others for the present . 4. They thus come to traine vp others against after times , as they themselues haue beene trained vp : whereby a continuall and perpetuall succession of all kindes of callings , is from time to time preserued : and thus Family , Church , and Common-wealth vpheld and maintained . In short time would all callings and functions vtterly decay , if a continuall supplie were not thus made . §. 51. Direction for parents in prouiding callings for their children . Two especiall cautions are to be obserued by parents in prouiding callings for their children . 1. That such callings be prouided as their children haue beene trained vp vnto , and are in some measure fitted and enabled to performe the duties thereof : as to prouide a Ministers place for him that hath beene brought vp in learning and studied diuinity : so in other callings such , as their children may be their crafts-masters therein . Thus shall their children doe the more good therein , both to others and themselues . Bezaleel and Aholiab were chosen to build the tabernacle because they were filled with wisdome to worke all manner of worke : likewise the seruants of Hirom were chosen to hew Cedar trees for the temple , because among the Iewes there were not any that could skill to hew timber , like vnto the Sidonians . Pharaoh was carefull to haue men of actiuity rulers ouer his cattell . 2. That such meanes be vsed for prouiding a calling as parents in vsing them may with faith call vpon God for his blessing . They that by lawfull meanes are brought into a calling whereunto they are fitted , are set therein by God , as is implied by this phrase , as God hath called euery one , &c. A lawfull entrance into a calling is a matter of great moment : he that so entreth may in a right vse thereof cast himselfe vpon Gods blessing , and with strong confidence expect the same , saying as the Prophet did , Lord I haue not thrust in my selfe thou knowest . §. 52. Of the extremes contrary to a parents lawfull care in prouiding fit callings for his children . The extreme in the defect contrary to a parents prouident care in prouiding a fit calling , is , a carelesse neglect of children after they are well educated , a leauing them to shift for themselues . * It is noted of the rauenous fowles that haue sharpe talents , that so soone as they perceiue their young ones to be able to fly , they will flap and beat them with their wings , and driue them out of their nests , and after that take no further care of them . We may not be like such cruell birds : reason ●nd religion teacheth vs otherwise . Good education is a good duty , but not a parents whole duty : the stay which is here made , may make all the former care and paines to be of little ●●se . Obiect . This is to be left to Gods prouidence . Answ . Meanes rightly vsed are subordinate to Gods prouidence , and by them doth God manifest his prouidence and bring his counsell to passe : to neglect meanes is to thwart and crosse the diuine prouidence . It is therefore well done to rely on Gods prouidence : but ill done to neglect the meanes of effecting it . Gods blessing is best discerned in the vse of meanes . The extreme in the excesse is a preposterous greedinesse in parents to bring their children to a calling . This is manifested two waies . 1. When they care not how fit their children be for the place , so it be a place of gaine and honour . Experience sheweth that this is the bane of Church and commonwealth . Hereby it falleth out in the politique body , as it would in a naturall body ; if the hand should take vpon it to see , or the leg to heare , or the foot to taste , what could from thence be expected but ruine to the body ? Trades-men oft vndoe themselues , their families and friends , by vndertaking such trades as they haue no skill in , or whereof they are not crafts-masters . The more excellent the calling is , the more mischiefe is done by this greedy preposterousnesse . This extreme is so much worse then the former , as it is worse to doe much hurt , then no good . 2. When they make no conscience of the meanes which they vse to bring their children into callings : but by vnlawfull meanes purchase their desires : as , by Simony to procure an ecclesiasticall function ( whence oft followeth also periury ) or by bribery to procure an office . These indirect meanes take away difference betwixt fitnesse and vnfitnesse of persons : for the vnfittest that be may by money purchase a place . Besides , though children be neuer so 〈◊〉 for these callings , yet there is little hope of any blessing from God , when the first entrance is without him : yea against his will and word . Who can thinke that God hath placed such a● one in his place ? if God haue not placed him , with what faith can he seeke a blessing ? with what hope can he expect a blessing ? Much terror is by this meanes brought to many men conscience : and they are oft in a great strait , not knowing whether it be fittest for them to retaine , or relinquish the●● place . But by the way to resolue that doubt , if one that hath vnlawfully entred be fit for the performance of his place , it then safest for him to seeke pardon for the former offence , and reconciliation with God , and vpon true and vnfained repentance to hold the place ( if at least the law vnder which he liueth establish him therein ) and be so much the more faithfull in the discharge of the duties thereof . §. 53. Of parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children . God hath further laid a charge vpon parents to prouide mariages for their children : for thus saith the Prophet in the name of the Lord vnto parents , b Take wiues to your sonnes , and giue your daughters to husbands : and thus the Apostle , c If any man thinke that he behaueth himselfe vncomely toward his virgin , if she passe the floure of her age , and need so require , let them marry . This direction was giuen in times of persecution , when by reason of the present necessity it was better not to marry : if then a parent ought to be carefull ( need requiring ) to prouide a mariage for his daughter , much more ought he in times of peace . Holy parents commended by the Holy Ghost haue beene carefull in performing this duty , as d Abraham , e Isaak , f Naomi , and others : yea g Hagar had learned this duty in Abrahams house . But the perfect patterne ( which surpasseth all other examples ) is of h God himselfe , who prouided a fit match for his i sonne Adam . 1. Children may not marry without consent of parents , ( as was * before shewed ) Parents therefore must be carefull in time to prouide for them . 2. Parents are to children in Gods place : they must therefore take vpon them this care of God. 3. Mariage is the meanes which the Lord hath sanctified to preserue our bodies chaste and vndefiled : as parents therefore desire to keepe their children from vncleannesse and pollution , they must take care that this meanes be vsed . Not only holy Apostles , but also * heathen Philosophers , and that by the light of nature , haue found this to be the fittest course . 4. This also is a meanes as to k increase the commonwealth , and l preserue an holy seed , and to erect new families , so to continue parents owne houses and name . §. 54. Direction to parents in prouiding mariages . Two cautions are to be obserued of parents in prouiding mariages for their children . 1. That the match which they prouide be meet : so said God when he was about to prouide a match for Adam , I will make him an helpe meet for him . Therefore * the match prouided must not be too neere of kin , of a contrary religion , of too vnequall an age , of too great disparity in estate . These things will hinder loue , and cause disdaine and hatred of one another . 2. Though the match may seeme meet in the parents eie , yet he may not force his childe thereto . Could a fitter match haue beene found out for Rebekah then Isaak ? yet Rebekahs friends g asked her consent . I denie not but parents may vse all manner of faire meanes to moue their children to yeeld to that which they see good for them : but if they cannot moue them to yeeld , to referre the matter to God , and not against their childrens minds to force them . When God had made a most meet match for Adam , he brought her to the man : namely to see how he would like her . For the neerest bond of all is betwixt man and wife ; a man must leaue father and mother , and cleaue vnto his wife ; man and wife must alwaies liue together : great reason therefore that at the first ioyning them together there be a mutuall liking of one another , lest euer after there be a perpetuall dislike : and though the authority of parents ought in this case to be inuiolable , yet a middle course is so to be held , as the parties may willingly with a mutuall consent ioyne themselues together . §. 55. Of the extremes contrary to parents care in prouiding fit mariages for their children . The extreme in the defect is , when parents carelesly let their children passe the floure of their age : and neuer consider whether need require that they should mary or no. Their children may sit long enough before they seeke out a match for them , vnlesse it be brought to them : and when one is offered though it be neuer so fit , yet except they may make an aduantage thereof to themselues , they will hardly yeeld to it . Thus they make their children to seeke out mariages for themselues , and without their consent to make them vp : or else to liue in discontent , if not in vncleannesse . By the carelesnesse of parents in this respect are children oft made a prey to the deuill : whereof at the day of iudgement parents shall giue an account to God. The extreme in the excesse is , * when parents through a couetous desire to get great and rich matches for their children , marie them before they be of yeares of discretion to like or dislike , to know what is meet or vnmeet ; or able to performe euen the essentiall duties of mariages : seldome doe such vnlawfull mariages prosper . In a like excesse doe they offend who for outward aduantages match their children to such as by nature are vnfit for mariage , to ideots , to * idolaters , to profane persons , or they care not to whom . And if their children like not these matches , they will doe to the vttermost of their power what they can to force them thereunto . Many mischiefes ordinarily fall out vpon such mariages , as vtter dislike betwixt husband and wife , continuall complaining one of another , inquiring after diuorce , or any other separation , wishing , yea practising one anothers death . To all these mischiefes doe parents , the cause thereof , make themselues accessary . §. 56. Of parents prouiding a stocke for callings and mariages of their children . An especiall outward meanes whereby parents may be the better inabled to prouide fit callings and mariages for their children , is , before hand to lay vp some stocke , or competent portion for their children . This is comprised vnder that generall prouision , whereof he that is carelesse is counted by the Apostle b worse then an insidell : but more expresly is it noted in these words , c Parents ought to lay vp for their children : and commended in d Abrahams example . While children are vnder their parents they haue no meanes to lay vp for themselues : for all their seruice is for their parents . But in regard of the times wherein we liue , it is needfull for setting vp in a good calling , and for obtaining a fit match , that children haue some stocke and portion . It lieth therefore vpon the parents , and their duty it is to prouide it . Obiect . Christ forbiddeth to lay vp treasures on earth . Answ . If the scope of that place be rightly marked , it will appeare that Christ there forbiddeth not simply the thing it selfe , but 1. The minde of him that layeth vp : namely when it is filled full of carking , and distrustfull thoughts : fearing that in the time to come he shall not haue sufficient . To this purpose doth Christ propound Gods prouidence ouer fowles and lillies . 2. The manner of laying vp , when temporall things are preferred before spirituall and heauenly : therefore he addeth this precept , but lay vp treasures in heauen , &c. 3. The measure , when men neuer thinke they haue laid vp enough : but scrape what they can come by iustly or vniustly ; and spare more then needs , euen things necessary , from themselues and others , to make a great stocke and portion for their children . The word of * treasuring vp ( which Christ there vseth ) implieth an immoderate measure . Among other needfull cautions for parents to be obserued in laying vp for their children , these three are especially to be noted . 1. That iustly they come by that which they lay vp : and lay nothing towards a childs portion which is any way vniustly gotten ; for the treasures of wickednesse profit nothing : they may proue a fire to consume parents themselues , their children , their house , and whole posterity . 2. That they couet not too much to make their children rich , and for that purpose liue meanly and basely themselues , yea and depriue themselues of many necessaries . An egregious point of folly is this , which Solomon hath much taxed . 3. That all needfull duties of charity to the poore , and of iustice to the Church and common-wealth be performed , and pretext of laying vp for children hinder none of these . §. 57. Of the extremes contrary to a parents prouiding portions for his children . The extremes contrary to the forenamed dutie are these : 1. When parents liue at the vttermost extent of their estate , and from time to time spend all their reuenues or all their gaines , and so are scarce able to make euen at quarter day , or yeares end . What stocke or portion can they lay vp for children ? 2. When parents liue aboue their estate , and spend riotously their ordinary gaines , or reuenues , and for other necessary affaires are forced to runne into debt . Many are so farre from helping their children in this kinde , as they are maine hinderance vnto them , vrging their eldest sonne especially who is their heire , to be bound for them , and so lay such a burden on his backe , as ( to vse the common phrase ) they make it cracke againe . 3. When parents haue enough for themselues and their children , and yet so couetously dote vpon their wealth , as they will not bestow a groat to helpe them in calling and mariage , but say they keepe all for them . What a wretched and foolish disposition is this , that they should still lay vp more and more for their children , and yet refuse to bestow any part thereof vpon them in their greatest need , when it might redound to their greatest benefit ? God oft meeteth with such couetous misers , and crosseth their purposes , by making strangers to enioy that which they greedily hoorded vp . §. 58. Of parents last speech to their children . The last dutie which parents owe to their children , is , when they cease to be parents : that is , when they are going out of this world . Their dutie at that time in generall is to doe what lieth in them , that it may goe well with their children after their departure . Both * the reasons which are oft vrged by the Holy Ghost , to stir vp parents to yeeld obedience to God , taken from extent of Gods blessing ( in this kinde of phrase , b Blessed shall their children be after them ) and Gods c promises made to that purpose doe proue as much . For the better performing of this dutie , three generall points , tending both to the temporall , and also to the spirituall good of children , are to be obserued : and two particular points most tending to their temporall estate . The three generals are these . 1. Good direction . 2. Faithfull prayer . 3. A wise choise of some friends to be as parents to them . 1. For direction . When parents obserue their time to draw neere , they ought to commend some wise and wholsome precepts vnto their children , the better to direct them in their Christian course . So did d Isaak , and e Iaakob . Ob. These Patriarchs had an extraordinarie spirit of prophecying , & by vertue thereof foretold their children things to come . Answ . * They sustained a double person : one of a prophet , another of a father : as prophets , they had an extraordinarie spirit ; as parents , they performed ordinarie dutie : by their extraordinarie spirit , they foretold things to come : the ordinarie dutie which they performed , was to direct their children how to carrie themselues in those times to come . For their prophesies were not only predictions , but also instructions , to direct and teach them what to doe . What they did by an extraordinarie spirit in extraordinarie things , we must doe in ordinarie duties by the ordinarie spirit of vnderstanding and wisdome which the Lord giueth vs. But the direction which d Isaak gaue to Iaakob , when he sent him to Laban , was no extraordinarie prophesie : nor that which e Dauid , when he was old , gaue to Solomon : and againe , f when he lay on his death-bed . Now these things are thus written for our imitation . And great reason there is to imitate those holy men in these things . For 1. The words of a dying parent are commonly most regarded : his last words doe make a deepe impression ( g this doe the brethren of Ioseph presse vpon him . ) If euer therefore there be a time seasonable for a parent to giue good instructions to his children , then is the time when parents are cleane departing from their children . 2. Thus shall a parent manifest his true affection , and earnest desire of his childrens good : for now they cannot thinke that he seeketh his owne ease , and profit , more then their good : as at other times some will be ready to say of their parents instructions and admonitions , Our parents know what is good for themselues . That the last words of parents may be the more seasonably and profitably deliuered to their children , they must note , on the one side , what euils their children are most prone vnto , what temptations they are most assaulted withall , what snares they are most like to fall into ; and on the other side , what vertues and graces are most needfull for them , and wherein they faile most , and accordingly they must order and frame their last words . Note for a patterne herein b Isaaks counsell to Iaakob , when he sent him to Laban , and thought he should neuer see him againe : and c Dauids to his sonne Solomon . §. 59. Of Parents last blessing to their children . II. Concerning the prayers of parents for their children , I noted it * before to be a generall dutie neuer to be omitted : yet here in particular I mention it againe , because a parents blessing consisteth therein especially : and then is the most proper time for parents to bestow a blessing on their children , as b Isaak , c Iaakob , d Dauid , and others did . Let parents therefore as they commend their owne soules into Gods hand , so commend their children vnto Gods grace and blessing . Gods prouidence is a good inheritance : many children doe thereby exceedingly prosper , though they haue but small outward meanes ; whereas others that haue great meanes vsed for their good , come to ruine ; Gods curse following them . Now no such meanes can be thought of to procure Gods blessing , or to with-hold his curse , as the faithfull prayers of parents for their children ; especially when parents are leauing their children , and going to God. §. 60. Of parents care to commend their children to some faithfull friends . III. The third generall point of making choise of some faithfull friends to commend their children vnto , is especially in behalfe of such as are not of sufficient age and discretion to looke to themselues , or to those weightie affaires which belong vnto them . The friends , which in this case are made choise of , ought to be such as the parents themselues by good experience haue found to be honest , wise , faithfull , and louing to them and theirs ; whom parents are to set in their owne place for the good of their children . This meanes did Dauid vse when he was old in the behalfe of his sonne Solomon . Many children haue found much helpe thereby . Such may make a good supply of the departure of parents . These are so much the more needfull , by how much the more vnstable , and vnbridled youth is ; and by how much the lesse able children are to helpe and guide themselues . §. 61. Of parents neglect of their children for the time to come . Contrary to a parents prouidence for the good of his children after his departure , is the carelesnesse of parents for the time to come . They thinke the world is gone with them when they are gone , and therefore they will take no thought for the future times that shall be after them ; as if it were enough for euery one to looke to his owne time . There may seeme to be more selfe-loue in such parents then loue of their children , in that their care determineth with their owne time , and extendeth not it selfe to the time and continuance of their children . Hence is it , that not a word of direction and exhortation commeth out of their mouths to their children when they are departing , no blessing that they will leaue behinde them , no friends shall be deputed by them , to be as parents to their children . Let God prouide , say they . But where there is a referring of matters to Gods prouidence , without the vse of those meanes which God hath warranted and commended by his word , there can be little hope that God should take care of that which is so commended to him . Such men doe not in faith depend vpon Gods prouidence , but make the very name thereof a pretext to cast off that care , which God as a bounden dutie requireth of them . As there is little loue of their children in such parents , so there is lesse zeale of Gods glory : for a parents care of his childrens welfare , especially of their continuing to feare and serue the Lord after their owne departure out of this world , is an especiall meanes of preseruing Gods feare in the world , and propagating it from age to age : so as this neglect is a greater fault then many are aware of . §. 62. Of parents making a Will before they die . The two particular things to be obserued by parents for manifestation of their prouident care ouer their children for the time to come , euen after their departure , especially in regard of their temporall estate , are these , 1. That they make a will. 2. That they leaue their estates to their children . 1. It hath beene an ancient commendable practise both among Gods people , and others also , that haue beene guided with common ciuilitie , when they who haue any estate , waxe old , or sicke , and haue any occasion of expecting death offered vnto them , to make their last Will and testament . This is set forth in the old Testament vnder this phrase ( Put thy house in order . ) A dutie it is expresly b commanded by God : and that not without good reason . For 1. A parents Will is an especiall meanes to settle peace among children after his departure , and to make them content with that allowance which he hath set out vnto them , because by the Will they know it was their fathers pleasure they should haue such and such a portion . If controuersies should arise , yet a Will is a meanes for the law speedily to determine the same without any tedious and chargeable suits : for the Apostle taketh it for a ruled case , that no man disanulleth or addeth any thing to a mans ' testament . 2. After a parent hath made his Will , he may the more quietly settle himselfe for heauenly contemplations , and preparations to death : and thinke of such good instructions as are most fit to giue as his farewell to his children : and the more willingly expect the moment of his dissolution : and the more patiently submit himselfe to the very stroke of death . In performing this dutie , a man must both obserue a fit time , and also take good aduice . The fit time is while his vnderstanding is good , and his memorie perfect : so as he may call to minde his debts , what he oweth , and what is owing to him : as also what goods he hath to bestow , and with discretion and wisdome order his estate . And because through the cauils which many vnconscionable lawyers and others are like to make , his true meaning may be peruerted , it is meet to haue the aduice of such as can in distinct words and phrases so expresse his meaning , as they shall be free from exception . Matters of weight are wisely to be managed . §. 63. Of neglecting to make a Will. Contrary is the daily practise of too many parents who are not willing to make any will at all : or else on vaine hope that they may liue longer , and when they are sicke , vpon conceit that they may recouer , or at least longer continue to enioy the vse of their vnderstanding and memory , put off the making of their Will till it be too late : and so die without Will , or make such a Will as ministreth more matter of sute , then if they had no Will at all ; either because doubt is made whether he that made it had his vnderstanding and memory or no : or because his Will is so abrupt and ambiguous , as his meaning cannot be knowne . The mischiefes that follow these neglects , are many . As 1. Discredit to the partie deceased . 2. Contentions among his suruiuing children . 3. Wasting a great part , if not his whole estate , in suits of law . 4. Defeating many creditors of their due debt . The reason which maketh many to put off the making of their Will is a foolish conceit , that if a mans Will be once made , then he must needs die out of hand . But what ground haue men for any such conceit ? If sicknes grow vpon a man , so long as his Will is vnmade his minde is vnsetled , his minde being vnsetled , the physicke that is ministred to him cannot so kindly worke ; so as his death may be the more hastened for not making a Will. Besides , if his speech faile before his vnderstanding , the thought that then he shall die without a Will may so perplex him , as his departure will be very vnquiet and troublesome . §. 64. Of parents leauing their estate to their children when they die . It was * before shewed that parents were to lay vp a portion for their children against their entrance into a calling , and mariage : There is a further duty required when they are going out of the world , namely that they leaue their whole estate to their children . ( Where I say whole , I exempt not workes of charity , nor payment of debts , which is a point of iustice , but I include more then is giuen as portions or stockes in their life time . ) That estate especially which parents haue receiued from their progenitors are they most bound to leaue vnto their children . It is expresly recorded that Abraham gaue all that he had to Isaak . Gods law did prouide for this among the Iewes : for a man might not sell his land to cut it off from his posterity . This was it that made Naboth refuse to sell his vineyard to Ahab , as his answer implieth , God forbid that I should giue the inheritance of my fathers vnto thee : because it was the inheritance of his fathers , that is , he had receiued it from them , he thought it vnlawfull to depriue his children of it . This phrase ( if children , then heires ) taketh it for a granted truth that children haue a right to their parents estate : and if they haue a right thereto , they may not be defeated thereof . God giueth wealth vnto parents but for their life time : in which time they are but as Guardians vnto Gods children , and are accountable to God : so as they haue not an absolute power to doe with it what they will , but according to the directions of the great Lord and Master they must vse it , reserue it , and leaue it . For this end parents must order their manner of liuing according to that portion which the Lord hath appointed vnto them , and by his prouidence bestowed vpon them ; they must ( as it is said in the prouerbe ) cut their coat according to their cloth . Of the two it is much better for parents to liue vnder , then aboue their meanes . Prouided that they neglect no duty of charitie , or iustice : nor through miserablenesse and niggardlinesse carry themselues vnbeseeming the place wherein God hath set them , and estate which he hath bestowed vpon them . He that liueth somewhat vnder his meanes , hath opportunitie to lay vp portions for other children ( if he haue many ) and to reserue his inheritance intire to his eldest ( beside many other good workes of charity as God shall offer occasion ) which he that liueth aboue his meanes cannot doe . §. 65. Of the inconueniences which improuident parents bring their children vnto after their death . Contrary to this branch of a parents prouidence , are many courses of improuident parents : For 1. Some parents lauish and bezell out all their estate in their owne life time , making it to determine in their persons . Vnworthy they are to receiue any inheritance from ancestors . Their fault is double . 1. In spending prodigally aboue their estate . 2. In wronging their children , and depriuing them of their right : for particular persons succeding one another are but as diuers linkes of a continued family , which are by Gods prouidence added one to another : this chaine is not to be broken at any mans pleasure ; but for the preseruation thereof , that which hath beene receiued of the predecessors , must be left to the successors . 2. Others leaue their estate to their children , but so incumbred with debts , bonds , recognizances , and statutes , as their children were better be without it , then haue it . For the hauing it maketh them liue at an answerable rate , and bringeth many burdens vpon them : besides , the debts wherein they stand obliged make them as d seruants to their creditors : and in time they must be forced to sell all , or as captiues lie in prison . 3. Others though they deale not so hardly with their children , yet they deale too hardly by peeling and polling their inheritance as much as they can : they wil not forbeare to make any present gaine that they can , though it tend neuer so much to the preiudice and dammage of their children after them : as they who cut downe all the timber and wood that they can , and take out all the heart of their land . 4. Among these may be reckoned such parents as by meere negligence suffer things to goe to decay for want of timely reparations : whereby it commeth to passe , that such dammages as in the parents time might haue beene preuented with laying out a few shillings , cannot be renewed with many pounds . 5. Such also as care not in their life time to cleere the titles of those things which they leaue to their children : but leaue all things so vnsetled and litigious , as it oft costs children more in suit of law to maintaine the inheritance which their parents leaue them , then the inheritance is worth : and yet after all their paines and cost lose the inheritance too : whereas the parent that knew more then the childe can , might with small paines and charge haue well setled and cleered all . These are mischiefes that many children haue beene brought into by the improuidence of their parents : which are the rather to be made knowne , that such as come after , may proue the more prouident for their children . §. 66. Of parents impartiall respect to all their children . Hitherto of parents duties . The persons to whom those duties are to be performed , are distinctly to be considered . The parties to whom parents are to performe all the forenamed duties are expressed vnder this word ( Children ) which hath not any speciall respect to prioritie of birth , to constitution of body , to affection of parent , or any such thing , as if first borne , proper , beautifull , darling , or the like children were only meant , but all that are begotten and borne of parents , all their children are meant . Whence I obserue , that Parents ought to haue an impartiall respect to all their children , and performe dutie indifferently and equally to all . We haue for proofe hereof Gods patterne , who accounteth all his children deare or beloued children . The Greeke word translated deare is very emphaticall : it is properly attributed to an only childe : the seuentie that translated the Hebrew Bible into Greeke , doe with this word interpret that phrase , Only Sonne : for where in Hebrew it is thus said to Abraham , take thy sonne , thine only one , they thus translate it , take thy sonne , thy deare one , or thy beloued one . Other Greeke authors doe so attribute the same word to an only childe , yea also and to an only eie : as when a man hath but one eie they call it a beloued eie . This word then sheweth that God so respecteth all his children , as if all were but one , all a first-borne , all a darling childe . So rare a vertue this impartiall respect is ( rare in the excellencie of it , rare also in the scarcitie of it ) as thorowout the Scripture I can scarce finde a perfect patterne thereof among the sonnes of men . Many may be giuen of the contrary , as we shall after heare . But the more rare it is , the more we must labour after it , that so we may resemble Gods fatherhood . 1. All our children come from our owne substance and bowels . Why then should we respect one childe aboue another , more then we doe one eie , or one eare aboue another ? We are as tender ouer one as ouer another , though it may be we haue more vse of one then of another . 2. All our children are alike committed to vs by God : the same precepts and directions giuen for all alike : the like account to be giuen for all . If a King should commit many of his children to one nurse , would not he be offended ( and that iustly ) if she should put such a difference betwixt them , through a foolish partialitie , as to respect some , and neglect others ? §. 67. Of parents preferring a dutifull childe before a disobedient childe . Obiect . What if one childe be more pious to God and parent , another more rebellious , may not a parent respect that more then this ? 1. Answ . He may take notice of their different carriage , and accordingly reward the one , and punish the other , and yet carrie an equall desire of doing good to both of them alike : for the punishing of the rebellious childe is a parents dutie ; an euidence of loue , and a meanes of doing him good . 2. Answ . It is no partialitie to like grace and goodnesse in a childe , and for grace and goodnesse sake to loue his childe so much the more , as also for impietie and obstinacy in rebellion to haue his heart the more alienated from his childe : this is rather a vertue in a parent . Partialitie is when on by and vndue respects one childe is preferred before another . §. 68. Of the prerogatiue of the first-borne sonne . Quest . May not a parent preferre his first-borne childe , and heire before his other children ? Answ . We must put difference betwixt a fathers disposing his estate vpon his children , and the ordering of his affection towards them . A parents affection , and care of good education , and desire of true good , and faithfull praiers to God , may be as great towards his younger children , as towards his eldest sonne and heire , and yet may he bestow the greatest patrimony vpon the heire : which is no partialitie . 2. Quest . Is it then iust and equall that the eldest sonne should haue a greater patrimony then any of the rest ? Answ . It is most iust and equall . For 1. God hath so appointed it : yea b he made this to be one of the prerogatiues of the first-borne , to haue a double portion . Vpon this ground c Ioseph , who was the first-borne of the true wife , had a double portion ; and as a testimony thereof his posteritie made two tribes . 2. The lawes of all nations doe order as much . 3. Our law giueth the whole inheritance of freeholds to the eldest sonne : in which respect it is due vnto him . For in ciuill and temporall matters this rule is true , we liue by law . I take it to be a matter of conscience for a parent to leaue that to euery childe which by law is due to him . Neither is it without good reason that the law ordaineth that a parents whole estate of freehold land should descend : for 1. There is an excellency in the first borne , as is euident by Iaakobs speech to his eldest sonne , d thou art my first borne , my might , and the beginning of my strength , the excellency of dignity , and the excellency of power . And thereupon e God tooke the first borne as peculiar to himselfe . 2. Houses and families by this meanes are vpheld and continued from age to age . How needfull it is for the establishment of a commonwealth that families should thus be continued , is euident both by experience to all such as haue but halfe an eie to see wherein the stability of a common wealth consisteth , and also by the many lawes which God ordained among the Iewes for this purpose : as 1. That f no land should be quite cut off from a family . 2. That g if any through pouerty were forced to sell his land , the next of kin was to buy it . 3. That h if a man that had sold his land , could by no meanes redeeme it againe , at the yeere of Iubilee he was to haue the possession of it againe . 4. That i if daughters were heires they should not marry out of their fathers tribe : and this reason is giuen , that euery man may enioy the inheritance of his fathers . Obiect . By leauing the whole inheritance to the eldest , he may be made a Gentleman , and all the other beggars . Answ . In this respect parents ought to be so much the more prouident for their other children , in training them vp to callings , or laying vp portions , or setling other estates vpon them beside the maine inheritance , or in taking order that comp●ent portions be raised out of the inheritance of the eldest son , ●n case God take them away before they haue otherwise pro●ided for their children . Out of this answer may a third reason be gathered , to shew that it is a behouefull law for the commonwealth that the heire should haue all the land . For this law maketh parents more carefull in training vp their younger sonnes to sundry callings which are profitable to a commonwealth . If euery childe should haue a part of his fathers lands , they would all so depend thereupon , as none of them would exercise themselues to such callings as are meanes of mens maintenance . §. 69. Of parents partiality towards some children . Contrary to the forenamed duty of a parents equall respect to all his children , is partiality in fathers and mothers , manifested sundry waies . For 1. Many parents haue their darling children , to whom so much affection is shewed , as in comparison none is shewed to others . When some are hugged in the bosome , others are neglected as if they were none of their owne , but basely borne . The vnnaturalnesse of the eagle is noted in this kinde , that she flaps and driues out of the nest one of her young ones , and feedeth only the other as her owne . From such partiality in parents proceed many mischiefes : as these , 1. They giue occasion to such as obserue it , to suspect that those children who are so little respected , are none of their owne . 2. They cause enuy , malice , and much contention to arise among children . When Iosephs brethren saw that their father loued him more then all them , they hated him , and could not speake peaceably vnto him . 3. They prouoke God to inflict some iudgement on those children that are so cockered , and preferred before the rest : that so they may the better see their folly . This sinne of parents partiality is so much the greater , when vpon outward respects they preferre the wicked and vngodly children before pious and gracious children . Isaak herein much failed , for c he loued Esau ( a d profane wretch ) because he did eat of his Venison . 2. Other parents so set themselues to raise their house , as a● their care is to aduance their eldest sonne , by education , by liberall allowance , and by leauing all they haue to him : and i● the meane while neglect their younger children . Though ( as was noted * before ) the maine inheritance may iustly without shew of partiality be left to the heire , yet to be carefull only for him , and to neglect the other , sauoureth ranke of partiality . It is most agreeable to naturall reason , that as life is giuen to all children , so meanes of maintaining life should be giuen to all . 3. In the number of partiall parents may they be reckoned , who vniustly disinherit their first borne . For the inheritance of right belonging to them , and they not deseruing to be disinherited , assuredly it is some by respect or other which maketh parents prefer the younger before the elder : and this is plaine partiality . This kinde of partiality is commonly in such parents as haue had children by seuerall wiues . Sometimes dislike of a former wife maketh a father dislike the children he hath by her , and through dislike to disinherit the heire by her . God gaue the Iewes an expresse law against this kinde of partiality . Sometimes againe a gripulous seeking of aduantage to themselues maketh parents to disinherit the right heire : as when a man after he hath buried the mother of his first borne , hearing of another woman which is of great wealth , maketh sute for her . She refuseth because he hath an heire of a former wife . He to remoue that blocke entereth couenant to make the sonne which he hath by her ( if he haue any ) his heire : hereupon the mariage is consummate : his second wife bringeth forth a sonne : he for his couenant sake disinheriteth the first heire . An vniust , and vnlawfull practise . §. 70. Of the causes for which the first-borne may be disinherited . Quest . May not then a first-borne sonne be disinherited ? Answ . Yes , The Scripture noteth two causes wherein the first-borne may be put from the inheritance . 1. If he be illegitimate : for such an one hath no good title : The sonne of the bondwoman shall not be heire with my sonne , saith Sarah , and that iustly . To like purpose say the sons of Gileads wife to Iephthah , Thou shalt not inherit in our fathers house , for thou art the sonne of a strange woman . Iust was that blame which Iotham laid vpon the men of Shechem for making Abimelech the base sonne of Ierubbaal King : and iust was Gods vengeance vpon them for that wrong done to Ierubbaals legitimate children . 2. If he be notoriously wicked . Thus e Ruben for committing abominable incest lost his birthright . Many particular crimes are reckoned vp by the * ciuill Lawyers , which would be too long here to recite . §. 71. Of the dutie of fathers and mothers in law . The extent of this title ( Fathers ) is in the last place to be considered . Not only naturall parents themselues , but also all that are in their place are comprised vnder it . As they who are in the place of parents , 1. By the bond of mariage . 2. By propinquity of bloud . 3. By voluntary appointment . The first sort are fathers and mothers in law : who are so reckoned either by the mariage of parents themselues , or by the mariage of their children . That man or woman which is maried to a parent that had children before their mariage , is in the place of a naturall parent : thus Ioseph was a b father to Iesus , and c Keturah a mother to Isaak . So againe the naturall parents of that sonne that hath maried a wife , or of that daughter that is maried to an husband , are in the place of parents to the wife of their sonne , and to the husband of their daughter . Thus d Iethro was a father to Moses , and e Naomi a mother to Ruth . All these are to account their children in law ( that is , the children of their husband and wife , or the wiues of their sons , and the husbands of their daughters ) as their owne naturall children , and according to the age and place of these children to performe the forenamed duties , and euery way to seeke their good ( except in such duties as after a peculiar manner belong to naturall parents , as nursing to a naturall mother , leauing the inheritance to a naturall parent . ) For a patterne hereof take the forenamed examples of Ioseph and Naomi . What naturall parents could doe more for their owne children then Ioseph did for Iesus , and Naomi for Ruth ? The history noteth how Ioseph tooke care to haue his wiues childe f circumcised , and presented in the temple : how he g fled from place to place to preserue the childs life : how h perplexed he was when he thought the childe was lost : how he i trained him vp in his owne house . The history also noteth how k Naomi brought Ruth her sonnes wife into her own countrey , and retained her with her selfe , and l directed her whither to goe , and m what husband to haue , and n became a nurse to her childe . 1. Mariage maketh man and wife one flesh : in which respect they ought to haue one minde , and the same affections , as mutually each to other , so ioyntly to the children of each other . On which ground also the husband and wife of a childe , being one flesh with the childe , ought as the childe to be respected . On this ground God counteth the Saints his o deare children , because they are p espoused to his naturall son . 2. To respect the children of an husband or wife as their owne , is a great euidence of intire loue to the husband and wife . And to respect the husband and wife of a childe is a great euidence of loue to the childe it selfe . If the worlds prouerbe hold true ( loue me and loue my dog ) how much more true is this Christian rule , loue me and loue my childe : or loue me and loue mine husband : or loue me and loue my wife . 3. This also is an especiall meanes to kindle and preserue mutuall loue betwixt man and wife , who haue children of former husbands and wiues : as also betwixt parents and children . §. 72. Of the peruerse cariage of fathers and mothers in law to their children . Contrary is the cariage of most fathers and mothers in law : especially of those who are maried to husbands or to wiues that had children before mariage : so farre they are from performing the forenamed duty , as rather they enuy at the prosperity of their husbands and wiues children : and secretly endeuour to hinder it in what they can : and cunningly leeke to alienate the naturall parents affection from them : whence fearefull tragedies haue beene made , and lamentable mischiefes haue followed . What other reason can be giuen hereof but a plaine instigation of the deuill , who thus laboureth to disunite those whom God hath ioyned together ? For auoiding this snare note the mischiefes that follow from thence . 1. Such parents sinne against Gods ordinance : and as Eue , leane more to Satans suggestion then to Gods direction . 2. They alienate the hearts and affections of one from another : not only from their children , but from themselues . 3. They prouoke their children in law to contemne and despise them , and to yeeld no duty vnto them . Hence note into what an hell vnkinde fathers and mothers in law doe cast themselues . If this were duly weighed , I thinke they would be otherwise minded . But the god of this world doth so blinde their eies with selfe-loue , and with enuy , that they cannot see the mischiefes whereinto they implunge themselues . This is a point the more to be weighed , because the fault here taxed is so common , and hath in all ages beene too common . What grieuous complaints haue in former times beene made , and still are made by children against fathers and mothers in law ? Whence also direfull imprecations haue followed . Let widowers and widowes that haue children seriously thinke of it before hand : and be the more circumspect in taking a second or third husband or wife : and after they are maried let them take heed of Satans snares : and let conscience of dutie more preuaile with them , then corruption of nature . §. 73. Of the faults of parents to their childrens husbands and wiues . Many parents to the husbands and wiues of their children doe also much transgresse and swarue from their dutie : for 1. They will shew much more respect to their owne children then to the children of their husbands or wiues : as by comming to their daughters when their husbands are abroad , and neuer but then : and sending for their sonnes to their house , but not for their wiues . 2. In all differences they will take part with their owne children , though it be in the worse part , and shew great partiality . 3. They will oft giue very ill counsell : aduising their sons to keepe their wiues short : aduising their daughters not to be too subiect to their husbands , yea priuily to purloine from their husbands . 4. If they liue with their children , they will so prie into euery thing that their childrens husband or wife doth , and shew such suspicion and iealously in euery thing , as they cannot but cause much discord : and hence it oft commeth to passe , that either parent and childe , or husband and wife must be parted : they cannot all in peace liue together . These faults I thus note , that they may the more carefully be auoided . §. 74. Of their dutie who are in stead of parents to Orphants . The next sort of those who are in stead of parents , are those who in bloud and kindred are next to parents : as grandfathers , grand-mothers , vncles , aunts , elder brothers , or sisters , their husbands or wiues , and cosins . These commonly are counted to be in the place of parents , when God taketh away naturall and immediate parents from their children : so as they are parents to Orphants . The duties which were prescribed to naturall parents appertaine to them ( except * before excepted . ) Their dutie is to see these Orphants well educated , well placed in some good calling , well maried , and ( if the Orphants be left destitute of meanes ) well prouided for . Mordecai is a worthy president and patterne for this kinde of parents . b He brought vp Esther his vncles daughter ( for she had neither father nor mother ) he tooke her for his owne daughter : when she was taken from him , c he went to know how she did , and what should become of her : and d he gaue her aduice from time to time how to carrie her selfe . Let such as are parents to Orphants take this example as a direction , and as a motiue to performe the other duties prescribed to naturall parents as need requireth , and occasion is offered . God by his prouidence taking away naturall parents committeth their Orphants as a charge to the next of kin : that as their naturall parents brought them forth , these should bring them vp : therefore for their recompence let them looke to God , ( who taketh vpon himselfe to be f a father of the fatherlesse ) and for their incouragement remember the reward which Mordecai receiued of the Lord : yea also let them remember the blessing that God bestowed vpon Esther . God doth oft so blesse the meanes vsed for the education of Orphants , as they who take the care thereof haue no cause to repent their paines and cost , but rather haue much matter of comfort , ioy and thanksgiuing . §. 75. Of the common neglect of Orphants . Too too common is the contrary disposition of most kinsmen , and kinswomen ; they thinke they are bound to none but their owne children , and if they haue no children , to none at all . Many are of Ruths kinsmans minde , they feare to marre their owne inheritance . Though they be themselues exceeding rich , and spend much in apparell , pastimes and house-keeping , yet they can suffer the Orphants of their poore kindred to want , and to beg for need . This is it that maketh the losse of naturall parents to be so much the greater . And herein many Christians are more inhumane then the heathen : which the Apostle implieth , where he faith , they are worse then infidels : for Orphants next of kinne are to be reckoned among those whom the Apostle termeth a mans * OVVNE . §. 76. Of the dutie of Guardians . The last sort of those who are in place of parents , are such as haue the charge of children committed to them by voluntary appointment of parents , or are chosen by children themselues , or by the magistrate when parents are dead , or lunatike , or any other way impotent , and vnable to traine vp their owne children . Of these care and conscience is rather required , then cost and charges : for commonly both their charges are allowed , and their paines recompenced . They who by reason of the death or impotency of naturall parents haue the charge of children committed to them , are commonly called Guardians : of whom two generall duties are required . 1. That they looke to their Pupils good education . 2. That they preserue their patrimony and inheritance . For their education , the directions giuen before to naturall parents are to be obserued by them . For preseruation of their patrimonie , they must doe for their Pupils what they would doe for their owne children ; and so carry themselues , as with good conscience they may giue that account to their Pupils , or any other , which the law requireth . The two forenamed duties , are the rhaine ends for which Guardians are chosen : in performing whereof , if they be faithfull , great redresse will be made of the vntimely death of parents ; and notwithstanding parents die before their children be of discretion to manage their estate , yet will their houses and families be maintained , and young heires kept from cunnie-catchers and cheaters . It is noted of Iohn , who had the mother of Iesus commended to him , that he tooke her to his owne home : whereby is implied his prouident care for her good . §. 77. Of the fraud of Guardians . Contrary is the practise of most Guardians , who take Pupils for their owne aduantage , and make a prey of them . The heathen could say , that Guardianship is to be performed for the benefit of the Pupill , and not of the Guardian . Yet among Christians is the forenamed fault of Guardians . 1. There are few children ( that haue not naturall parents to looke to their good education ) but are exceedingly neglected therein , and brought vp very rudely and licentiously : yea many times too sparingly and ●iggardly for diet , apparell , and other needfull things , though they haue sufficient to discharge all that shall be laid out vpon them . 2. The maine estate & patrimonie of many Pupils is much impaired : and if they haue lands , as much waste is made vpon them as possibly can be : and when a reckoning is to be giuen , it shall be a large , vniust , and most vnconscionable reckoning of the Guardian can but get a generall release , it is all that the caueth for . 3. Mariages are after a for forced vpon many Pupils : and such matches put vpon them as they cannot like ; yea such as are no way fit for them , neither for estate , nor yeeres , nor proportion of bodie , nor qualities of minde . Little doe these Guardians thinke of that account where unto they shall be brought an other day before the Lord , who stileth himselfe the c helper of the fatherlesse , and who beholdeth mischiefe to requite it . Fearefull is that iudgement which the Lord hath d threatned against those that oppresse the fatherlesse . Let not therefore vniust Guardians thinke , that the gaine they get wrongfully from their Pupils shall prosper : but rather let them looke for Gods curse vpon their owne children , and goods . If such as parents themselues haue vpon their death-beds committed their children vnto , in confidence of their faithfulnesse , shall deale deceitfully with their Pupils , their sinne is doubled , and trebled . For 1. They violate the bond of friendship , faithfulnesse , and trust reposed vpon them . 2. They sinne directly against iustice . 3. Most monstrously they transgresse the rules of charitie . §. 78. Of the dutie of Schoolemasters and Tutors . Among those who are by voluntarie appointment set in the place of parents , are Schoolemasters and Tutors to be reckoned . The authoritie and charge of a parent is for a time committed to them : therefore for that time they ought to performe a parents dutie . Their dutie is appropriated to education : it appertaineth not to them to maintaine the children committed to them : they are rather themselues by their paines that way maintained . All the duties which were before comprised vnder nurture , belong to Schoolemasters and Tutors . More particularly they are to instruct children in three things . 1. In learning . 2. In ciuilitie , and good manners . 3. In true pietie , and religion . I shall not need to speake more of these points then hath * before beene deliuered : only to prouoke them to be diligent in well nurturing children in those three points , let the benefit of good Schoolemasters and Tutors be well noted . Schoolemasters commonly cast the first seed into the hearts of children : they first season them : as the seed is , such will the crop be : as the first seasoning is , so will the sauour continue to be . If they sowe no good seed at all , what haruest can be looked for ? If they sowe a corrupt seed of rudenesse , licentiousnesse , profanenesse , superstition , and any wickednesse , the crop must needs be answerable thereto . But if they sowe the good seed of learning , ciuilitie , and pietie , there is great hope of a good crop . Hence it followeth that they are of great vse , and may bring much good , not only to the children themselues , and their parents , but also to the Church and Common-wealth . Iulian the Apostat was not ignorant hereof : and therefore endeuouring to root Christianitie out of the world , he suffered no man that professed himselfe a Christian , to teach a schoole : but in stead of Christian Schoolemasters , he set vp in euery part of his dominions , heathenish Schoolemasters . Tutors , to whose gouernment young schollers , that are sent to the Vniuersities , are committed , haue to deale with children in their riper yeeres ; euen when the time of setling them in a course is come : the very time wherein much good may be done to children , or else wherein they may be vtterly peruerted . There will be little hope of bowing them , and drawing them into another course after they be freed from the gouernment of a Tutor . Tutors therefore , as they haue need of great wisdome , so of good conscience , that they may haue the greater care of their Pupils , and take the greater paines in teaching them the three forenamed points , learning , ciuilitie , and pietie . A good Tutor may doe much to repaire the negligence , and amend the defects of a Schoolemaster : but there remaine none to redresse the failings of a Tutor : children for the most part are past redressing , when they cease to haue a Tutor . §. 79. Of the negligence of Schoolemasters and Tutors . The vices contrary to the forenamed dutie of Schoolemasters , are these . 1. Unskilfulnesse . Many that are more fit to be taught then to teach , take vpon them this weightie calling . Some haue not sufficient learning : some againe are rude , and know not themselues good manners : and some know not the first principles of the oracles of God. No good can be expected from these . 2. Couetousnesse . All that many seeke , is to multiply the number of their schollers , and to get as much as they can for boording , and teaching : they aime more at their owne gaine then at their schollers profit . Children are not like to thriue well vnder them . 3. Negligence . Many are loth to take the paines of a Schoolemaster , and thereupon come as little into the schoole as they can : take euery small occasion to be gone againe : care not how much their children play : if they be able to hire a poore Vsher , all the burden shall be cast vpon him . Little is that fruit that can be looked for from them . 4. Want of pietie . Many skilfull and painfull Schoolemasters , vnder whose teaching children come forward exceeding well in learning , thinke it nothing appertaineth to them to teach the grounds of religion , so as they altogether neglect pietie . Assuredly they want it themselues : for were their owne hearts seasoned with true pietie , their consciences would moue them to teach it to their children . The things of the kingdome of God are like vnto ●eauen , which seasoneth the whole batch of dough with that season and sauour which it selfe hath . When children spend almost all their time with their Schoolemasters , of whom should they learne it , if not of them ? What blessing can be hoped from the paines of such Schoolemasters ? I might to these adde the ouer-much remisnesse of some ( whereby children get too great an head ) and the too great seueritie of others , either in frequencie of correcting , as if they delighted therein ; or in the measure thereof , as if they had to doe with beasts , whereby they affright children , make them dull , yea and impudent also . But these extremes were * before handled . The common fault of Tutors is altogether to neglect their Pupils . Many thinke a Tutor to be a meeretitular matter : no more to be required of them but to beare the very name ; and to vndertake that the Colledge be discharged for their Pupils diet . This conceit , and the practise answerable thereunto , is the blemish and bane of the Vniuersities . Many children well trained vp in schooles , vtterly lose the benefit of all their former education when they are sent to the Vniuersitie , because their Tutors altogether leaue them to themselues : and so they are made a prey to idle and lewd companions . By reason hereof many parents are vtterly discouraged to send their children to the Vniuersitie . The seuenth Treatise . Duties of Seruants . §. 1. A Resolution of the Apostles direction to Seruants . EPHES. 6. 5. Seruants be obedient to them that are your Masters according to the flesh , with feare and trembling in singlenesse of your heart , as vnto Christ . 6. Not with eie-seruice , as men-pleasers , but as the seruants of Christ , doing the will of God from the heart . 7. With good will doing seruice , as to the Lord , and not to men . 8. Knowing that whatsoeuer good thing any man doth , the same shall he receiue of the Lord , whether he be bond or free . THe third and last couple of a family are — Masters . Seruants .   The direction which the Apostle giueth to seruants , is in this text set downe . Therein he 1. Declareth their duties . 2. Addeth motiues to performe them .   I. In declaring seruants duties he noteth — 1. The kindes of them . 2. The manner     3. The extent     1. The kindes of seruants duties are noted in two words , — Obey , vers . 5. Serue , vers . 7.   2. The manner is set downe Affirmatiuely , vers . 5 , 7. Negatiuely , vers . 6 , 7.   1. Affirmatiuely by shewing what graces are requisite : to which purpose he reckoneth vp foure particulars . 1. Feare and trembling . 2. Singlenesse of heart . 3. Conscience to Christ . 4. Good will. Vnder which are comprised — 1. Cheerfulnesse . 2. Readinesse .   3. Diligence .   4. Faithfulnesse .   2. Negatiuely , by shewing what vices are to be auoided , and these are two especially , 1. Eie-seruice , which is opposed to doing of things — as Christs seruants . from the heart .   2. Men-pleasing , which is opposed to doing the will of God. 3. The extent of seruants duties is noted in these foure phrases , — 1. Masters after the flesh , vers . 5. 2. As to Christ , vers . 5.   3. As seruants of Christ , vers . 6.   4. Doing Gods will , vers . 6.   II. The motiues which the Apostle vseth are partly — Implied . Expressed .   They are implied three waies . 1. By declaring the place of a Master ( as to Christ . ) 2. By noting out the honour of their seruice ( as seruants of Christ . ) 3. By shewing the ground of seruants subiection ( Gods will. ) The motiue expressed is the Recompence which seruans shall haue for their paines largely laid forth , vers . 8. Therein these distinct points are noted in order . 1. The assurance thereof ( knowing . ) 2. The ground thereof , taken from a generall rule ( whatsoeuer good thing any man doth . ) 3. The particular application thereof ( whether bond or free . ) 4. The kinde thereof ( the same shall he receiue . ) 5. The author and giuer thereof ( of the Lord. ) §. 2. Of the lawfulnesse of a masters place and power . In handling seruants duties I will proceed according to the order propounded . In the first place therefore I will note out the kindes of seruants duties . For finding out the kindes , I will obserue the method followed in handling childrens duties . Note then 1. The Fountaine of seruants duties . 2. The Streames that issue from thence . The Fountaine resteth partly in the opinion , and partly in the affection of seruants . In their Opinion they must be informed and resolued that the place of a master and a seruant is lawfull and warrantable : that God ingenerall ordained degrees of superioritie and inferioritie , of authority and subiection : and in particular gaue to masters the authoritie which they haue , and put seruants in that subiection wherein they are . Till the iudgement be resolued hereof , nor reuerence , nor obedience will be yeelded as it ought . For Reuerence hath reference to Eminencie and superioritie : and Obedience to Authoritie and power . Who will reuerence or obey him whom he taketh to be his equall ? This was the ground of the conspiracie of Corah , Dathan and Abiram , that they thought a Moses and Aaron tooke too much vpon them , and lift themselues vp aboue the congregation of the Lord. Wherefore I will here note the grounds of a masters authoritie , and seruants subiection . 1. God hath giuen expresse commandement vnto masters to gouerne their seruants : and vnto seruants to be subiect to their masters . b In the fourth commandement God giueth a charge to masters ouer their seruants , to see that they doe no manner of worke . And the Angell biddeth Hagar c humble her selfe vnder her mistresse hands . And here seruants are commanded to obey their masters . 2. Many directions are giuen both to masters and seruants in regard of their different places how to carry themselues one to another . Read for this purpose the many lawes which Moses prescribed to both : the many counsels which Solomon , in his prouerbs especially , giueth also to both : and particularly the directions of this and other Apostles . 3. Saints in all ages haue beene set in these places : some in the places of masters , and some in the places of seruants : and according to the place wherein God hath set them , they haue performed their dutie : masters the duties of masters , and seruants the duties of seruants . 4. The many parables which Christ vseth taken from the power which masters haue and exercise ouer their seruants , and the subiection which seruants yeeld to their masters , shew that the authoritie of the one , and subiection of the other , are things without question granted and not denied . 5. God hath made many promises of reward both to masters , and seruants , that conscionably performe the duties of their place : and hath made many threatnings against the one and the other that are negligent therein . All these grounds are so cleerely and plentifully noted in the Scripture , that any one who is any whit acquainted therewith may know them to be so . Were there no other arguments then this text which I haue in hand , it were enough to confound all gainsaiers : and to moue such as beleeue the rather for their faith and profession sake to serue their masters after the flesh . §. 3 Of the Anabaptists arguments against the authoritie of masters , and subiection of seruants . Contrary to this first ground of seruants subiection is the opinion of Anabaptists , who teach that all are alike , and that there is no difference betwixt masters and seruants . Their reasons , whereby they would make shew to proue their vnreasonable opinion , are these . 1. Obiect . Masters are either Infidels or Christians , and so seruants either one or other . If masters be Infidels , and seruants Christians , how vnmeet is it that Christians should be subiect to Infidels ? and if master and seruant be both Christians , they are brothers : but brothers are equalls , and neither subiect to other . Answ . Rule and subiection are matters of outward policy , they tend to the outward preseruation of Church , Common-wealth , and family , in this world : but faith , piety , and such graces are inward matters of the soule , tending to a better life . These being thus different , one that is more excellent in the one , may be inferiour in the other . Yea though there be an equality in the one , namely , in spirituall things , yet there may be a disparity in the other , namely , in ciuill and temporall matters . And though Saints may be farre inferiour to infidels in outward estate , yet they are not a whit the lesse glorious before God. The honour proper and peculiar to Saints is inward , not visible to the carnall eye of a naturall man. 2. Obiect . It is against nature for one to be seruant , especially a bond-seruant to another . Answ . To grant that it is against that absolute and perfect nature wherein at first God created man , and that it came in by sinne , yet is it not against that order and course of nature wherein God hath now setled man. God hath turned many punishments of sinne to be bounden duties ; as subiection of wife to husband , and mans eating bread in the sweat of his brow . 3. Obiect . It is the prerogatiue of Christians to be b all one : but subiection of seruants to masters is against that prerogatiue . Answ . That prerogatiue is meerely spirituall : for in Christ all are one , as they are members of Christ , which is a spirituall body : not as they are members of a politique body . A politipue inequality is not against a spirituall equality . 4. Obiect . This subiection is against the c liberty that Christ hath purchased for vs , and wherewith he hath made vs free . Answ . It is not . For that liberty is from the curse and rigor of the morall law : from the ceremoniall law and the rites thereof : from Satan , sinne , death , and damnation : but not from those degrees which God hath established betwixt man and man , for the good of mankinde . 5. Obiect . We are expresly forbidden to be d seruants of men . Answ . To be a seruant in that place is not simply to be in subiection vnder another , and to doe seruice vnto him , but to be so obsequious to a man , so addicted to please him , and so subiect to his will , as to doe whatsoeuer he will haue done : to regard nothing but his pleasure : to prefer it before Gods word and will. It is not therefore the thing it selfe , but an excesse therein which is there forbidden . §. 4. Of a seruants feare of his master . The other part of that fountaine , from whence the duties of seruants flow , resteth in the affection : and it is in one word Feare : which is an awfull dread of a master . An awe in regard of his masters place : a dread in regard of his masters power . An awe is such a reuerend esteeme of his master , as maketh him account his master worthy of all honour : which b S. Paul expresly inioyneth seruants to doe . A dread is such a feare of prouoking his masters wrath , as maketh him thinke and cast euery way how to please him . This is it which the Apostle here intimateth vnder these two words , feare and trembling . In both these respects S. Peter commandeth seruants to be subiect in al feare . So proper is this feare to a seruant in relation to his master , as where it is wanting , there is a plaine deniall of his masters place and power ; which God intimateth vnder this expostulation , If I be a master , where is my feare ? that is , you plainely shew that you account me not your master , because in your heart there is no feare of me . This feare will draw seruants on , cheerefully to performe all duty : the more it aboundeth , the more desire and endeuour there will be to please , and to giue good contentment ( and this is a point commanded to seruants , to please well in all things : ) yea it will glad the heart of a seruant to see his seruice prosper well : hereof we haue a worthy patterne in Abrahams seruant , whose care to doe his businesse , as his master would haue it , and prayer for Gods assistance therein , and thanks for Gods blessing thereon , sheweth an awefull respect which he bare to his master . Againe , on the other side , this feare will keepe men from of fending their masters ( which was one reason that moued Ioseph not to yeeld to his mistresse ) and in this respect it may preuent many mischiefes which their masters offence and wrath might bring vpon them . One especiall meanes to breed and preserue this feare in seruants , is , a due consideration of the ground of their masters place and power : which is Gods appointment : God hath placed them in his stead , and in part giuen them his power : they are the Deputies and Ministers of God , and therefore in Scripture the title ( * Lord ) is after a peculiar manner giuen to them . What maketh subiects stand in awe of inferiour Magistrates ? Is it not because they beare the Kings person , and haue authority and power giuen vnto them of the King ? §. 5. Of the extremes contrary to seruants feare of their masters . Two extremes are contrary to this seruant-like feare . 1. In the excesse a slauish feare : when they feare nothing but the reuenging power of their master : the staffe or the cudgell , as we speake : so they may auoid that , they care not whither their master be pleased or no. This maketh them oft to wish that their masters had no power ouer them : or that they were dead . This was that feare which possessed the heart of that vnprofitable seruant , who said to his master , I knew thee that thou art an hard man , and I was afraid . Such seruile seruants will neuer be profitable . 2. In the defect , a light esteeme and plaine contempt of masters . That this is contrary to feare is euident by that opposition which God maketh betwixt them in these words , If I be a master , where is my feare , ô ye that despise my name ? As if he had said ; Hereby ye shew that ye feare me not as a master , because ye despise me . This sinne of despising masters is expresly c forbidden : and for it was d Hagar dealt hardly withall . When masters are poore , meane , weake , aged , or otherwise impotent , then proud seruants are prone to despise them : which argueth a base minde , shewing that they respect their masters power more then his place : the poorest and weakest haue the same place and authority ouer seruants , that the richest and strongest haue ; all beare Gods image alike : but disdainfull proud seruants shew that they regard not Gods image at all . §. 6. Of seruants reuerence in speech . The two maine streames which issue out of the forenamed fountaine , are — Reuerence . Obedience .   Reuerence is manifested in Speech . Cariage .   In Speech by Refraining Speech . Well ordering     Seruants reuerence in refraining speech is manifested 3. waies . 1. By sparing to speake , without iust cause in their masters presence or audience : This phrase ( a they stand continually before thee and heare thy wisdome ) spoken of Salomons seruants , sheweth that they were slow to speake and swift to heare in their masters presence . 2. By forbearing to reply when they obserue their masters vnwilling that they should speake any more . Thus did Peter forbeare when his master gaue him this short answer , b What is that to thee ? 3. By attending to that which their masters shall deliuer to them : for seruants ought to shew such a respect to their masters speaking to them , as Samuel did to God , when he said , c Speake for thy seruant heareth . The titles of Lord and Seruant doe shew , that this speech is taken from the duty of seruants . The notation of the d Greeke word vsed by the Apostle , & translated Obey , implieth as much . This reuerence did Abrahams e seruant shew to his master , when he gaue him a charge about choosing a wife for his son . Seruants for well ordering their speech vnto their masters must obserue fiue cautions . 1. That they haue iust occasion to speake : and that is either when their masters require them to speake ( as f the disciples ) or when they see it behouefull for their masters that they should speake . In such cases speech argueth reuerence , as well as silence in other cases . The generall points which were before deliuered of the reuerence of * wiues to their husbands , and of * children to their parents , may be applied to seruants : and pressed vpon them as an argument from the lesse to the greater thus , If wiues ( who in many things haue a ioynt authority with their husbands ) & children ( who are not in so seruile a degree subiect to their parents , as seruants to their masters ) must manifest their inward feare of their husbands and parents by outward reuerence , much more must seruants to their masters . To declare the force of this consequence so much the more , let it be noted that the Apostle addeth another kind of word here , then he did before , either in wiues or childrens duties , namely * trembling . Quest . In what cases may it be behouefull for masters that their seruants speake to them ? Answ . 1. When they know any thing that may be profitable for their masters , they ought to declare it , though they be not asked : as g that maide which told her mistresse Naamans wife , that there was a Prophet in Samaria that could deliuer him of his leprosie . 2. When masters through ignorance , passion , or such like cause , refuse to doe that which their seruants know to be good for them , they ought to perswade their masters to doe it ; as Naamans seruants perswaded their master to wash himselfe in Iordan as the Prophet aduised him . 3. When seruants are not fully instructed in those things which they ought to doe for their master , they ought to aske of him what is to be done , as the disciples who said to their master , where wilt thou that we prepare for thee to eat the passeouer ? 4. When some scruple ariseth in their minds about any charge that their master shall giue them , they may inquire of their master , as Abrahams seruant when he said , what if the woman will not come with me ? 5. When their master vniustly suspecteth any euill of them , they may speake to cleere their owne innocency , as Dauid did to Saul . A second caution for seruants well ordering their speech is , That the very forme and manner of their speech when they haue iust occasion to speake to their masters , doe sauour of reuerence : for which purpose let these particulars be noted . 1. That seruants giue reuerend titles to their masters . It was in an honourable respect of their master that the seruants of Naaman , called him Father . In Scripture * one of Gods titles is attributed to masters , as Lord. 2. That their words be few , no more then must needs , euen when they haue occasion to speake : as may be gathered out of the forenamed examples alleaged to shew when seruants might and ought to speake . 3. That all their words spoken to their master be meeke , milde and humble : note for this purpose how the children of the Prophets framed their speech to their master . 1. They humbly beg leaue for themselues to goe to Iorden . 2. They intreat him to goe , in these words , vouchsafe I pray thee to goe with thy seruants . 3. When one of them had lost the head of his hatchet , as if he durst not be so bold as to speake to his master to get it him againe , he referreth the thing to his good pleasure , saying , Alas master it was but borrowed . A third caution is , That they obserue a fit season to speake to their master : as when he is at leasure to heare them : ( thus it is noted of the disciples that when their master was alone they propounded their questions vnto him ) or when his minde is quiet , not troubled with passion ( thus when Dauid obserued that Sauls minde was somewhat pacified towards him , by that speech he vsed , Is this thy voice my sonne Dauid , then he tooke occasion more freely to speake to him . ) A fourth caution is , That they giue a ready and present answer to their master . This is oft commended in Peter , that when Christ propounded any question to his disciples , he would presently and readily answer . A fift caution is , That all their speeches and answers to their master be true , not daring to tell a lie vnto them : this argueth a very reuerend respect of a master . When Eli demanded of Samuel what the Lord had said to him , Samuel told him euery whit and hid nothing from him . And when Dauid bid the woman of Tekoah not to hide the thing that he should aske her from him , she told him the whole truth . There is a double bond to tie seruants hereunto . 1. Their conscience towards God , who is a God of truth . 2. Their respect to their masters with whom they ought to deale faithfully . Lastly , a seruants reuerence ought to be manifested by his speech of his master euen behinde his backe : speaking good of him , and no euill : this part of reuerence also did Abrahams seruant shew to his master . Thus shall they shew themselues good , true-hearted , faithfull seruants , and not parasites . §. 7. Of the vices contrary to a seruants reuerence in speech . Offences contrary to the forenamed Reuerence of seruants to their masters are these . 1. Sawcinesse and boldnesse in seruants when they haue no more respect to their masters presence then to any others , but are full of prate , and loud in speech before their master , or in the roome next to him , where they may be heard as well as if they were in the same roome : much offence is thus oft times giuen to masters . 2. Importunity in speaking , and replying againe and againe , though their masters doe not only shew their dislike thereof , but also expresly charge them to speake no more . Scolding maids that will haue the last words of their mistresse much offend herein . This is directly against the Apostles prohibition to seruants , that they answer not againe . 3. Impatiency , when they cannot endure to heare their master make an end of his speech , but either they will interrupt him , or fling away . 4. Stoutnesse , when ( as Solomon noteth ) though they vnderstand , they will not speake : though they know very well that it is their masters pleasure they should speake , yea though they are bidden to speake , yet their stout stomach , and sullen heart will not suffer them to speake : no though it be neuer so behouefull for their masters : if they know that their master goeth on in a course very preiudiciall to him , yet will not they tell him of it : nay if their master vniustly suspect any euill of them , they will let him abide in that iealously rather then speake to cleare themselues : and if their master doe not expresly appoint them from time to time what to doe , they will neuer aske : nor if they be doubtfull of that which he giueth them in charge , will they further inquire to be resolued thereof . This kinde of silence , in these and such like cases , argueth more doggednesse then dutifulnesse . 5. Disdaine , when they * scorne to giue the title Master to him that is set ouer them , because he is a poore and meane man. 6. Arrogancy , when their words are high and lofty against their master , pretending that they are as good as he , though for a time they be vnder him . Clerkes , prentises , waiting women , and such like , being borne of gentlemen , and men of good degree , are for the most part guilty of this fault : the reason is , because their birth and parentage maketh them forget their present place and condition ; or else ( which is worse ) maketh them wilfully presume aboue it . 7. Muttering and murmuring vpon euery occasion of discontent : whereby it commeth to passe that they oft prouoke much wrath ( for grieuous words stirre vp anger . ) 8. Vnseasonable interruption of their master : speaking to him when he is seriously occupied in some weighty businesse ( as they who told Christ of his mother and brethren when he was preaching ) or vnseasonably speaking vnto him while he is in passion , whereby they oft bring much mischiefe vpon themselues . 9. Answering their master at their owne leisure , suffering him to call , and call againe and againe . This doth Iob complaine of , saying , I called my seruant and he gaue me no answer . 10. Flapping their master in the mouth with a lie : like Gehazi , who , when he had lewdly fetched money and apparell of Naaman , and his master asked him where he had beene , said with a faire face , Thy seruant went no whither . Let the iudgement executed on him make all seruants take heed of the like sinne . For Lying is in it selfe an hainous sinne : yet so much the more hainous when it is told to one that hath authority ouer vs , and by reason thereof standeth in Gods place . Lastly , Euill language of their master behinde his backe . This is a sinne , though that which is spoken to a masters disgrace be true : for the infirmities of a master ought rather to be couered , then reuealed and laid open by a seruant . How monstrous a sinne is it then , to raise slanderous reports against a master which are vntrue ? This was Zibas sinne against Mephibosheth his master . Hitherto of seruants Reuerence in speech to their masters . Their Reuerence in cariage followeth . §. 8. Of seruants reuerend behauiour to their masters . For manifestation of a seruants reuerence in cariage towards his master , three things are especially required . 1. Dutifull obeysance . 2. Respectfull behauiour . 3. Modest apparell . I. Such dutifull and submissiue obeysance and curtesie , as beseemeth their sex and place , and that according to the most vsuall custome of the country and place where they are , must seruants performe to their masters , as they haue occasion to goe to them , to come from them , to receiue any charge of them , or to bring any message vnto them . Where Isaak saith in his blessing giuen to Iaakob , Be lord ouer thy brethren , and let thy mothers sonnes bowe downe to thee , by that phrase of bowing downe , he noteth the condition of a seruant , and withall implieth a seruants dutie : on this ground , when the children of the Prophets saw that the spirit of Eliah rested on Elisha , they taking it for an euident signe that God had made him a gouernour and master ouer them , they came to meet him , and bowed themselues to the ground before him . II. Answerable to a seruants obeisance must be his whole behauiour before his master , seasoned and ordered with such modestie and humilitie , as may manifest an honourable respect to his master : as 1. To stand in his masters presence ; which testifieth a readinesse to performe any seruice which his master shall appoint him to doe : this was one thing noted , and commended by the Queene of Sheba in Solomons seruants : she saw their d standing , and said , happy are these thy seruants that stand before thee . Whereas it is said that she saw also their sitting , that phrase sheweth a seemly order which they obserued euen when they were out of his presence , by giuing and taking their right and due place . 2. By vncouering their heads in their masters presence : this in our dayes , and in the parts of the world where we dwell , is in the male kinde a signe and token of subiection . 3. By sobrietie and modestie both in countenance , and in the whole disposition of bodie , especially when seruants are in their masters presence : for to compose countenance and whole bodie soberly , because of the presence of one , argueth a reuerend respect of that person , for whose sake that sobrietie is shewed . III. The apparell also which seruants weare must be so fashioned and ordered , as it may declare them to be seruants , and vnder their masters , and so it will argue a reuerend respect of their masters . One end of apparell , is to shew a difference betwixt superiours and inferiours , persons in authoritie and vnder subiection . It pleased the Holy Ghost to note this particular ( and their apparell ) as an obseruable point in Solomons seruants . §. 9. Of the faults of seruants contrary to reuerence in cariage . The cariage of many seruants towards their master is cleane contrary to the forenamed reuerence . For 1. Some through rudenesse , and want of good bringing vp , come to their masters , and goe from them , as to and from their fellowes : no testimonie of reuerence by any obeysance : they know not how to giue it : whereby they dishonour their parents , and manner of education . 2. Others , if at first comming to their master they giue some salutation , yet , through too much familiaritie with them , all the day after they will carry themselues fellow-like , scarce vncouering their heads in their masters presence , not enduring to stand long before him , but either setting themselues downe , or slinking away when they should be in presence . Doubtlesse from this ouermuch familiaritie arose this prouerbe , Good morrow for all day . This vnmannerly familiaritie is commonly in such seruants , as haue poore and meane masters : for rich and great mens seruants can be so full of curtesie , as not a word shall be spoken by their masters to them , or by them to their masters , but the knee shall be bowed withall : they can stand houre after houre before their masters , and not once put on their hat : if they be walking after their masters , their master shall not turne sooner then their hat will be off , and that so oft as he turneth or speaketh to them . Why should rich masters haue so much reuerence shewed to them , and poore masters none at all ? Doe not the poore beare Gods image as well as the rich ? Doth Gods word make any difference betwixt rich and poore ? Doth it say , Serue rich masters with feare and trembling ? Surely it is the corruption of mans heart , which maketh this difference . Seruants naturally more regard their masters outward abilitie , then inward authoritie : the honour which the world conferreth on men , more then the honour which God conferreth : for God hath giuen as much honour and authoritie to a poore master as to a rich , in that he is a master . Seruants commonly most faile in this dutie of reuerence towards their masters there where they should most of all shew it , namely , in the courts of God , and assembly of Gods people , where the very Angels are present to behold our seemly cariage : thus they cause the ministerie of the word to be euill spoken of , and thereby make their sinne so much the more hainous . 3. Exceeding great is the fault of seruants in their excesse in apparell . No distinction ordinarily betwixt a mans children and seruants : nay none betwixt masters and their men , mistresses and their maids . It may be while men and maids are at their masters and mistresses finding , difference may be made : though euen then also , if they can any way get wherewithall , they will do what they can to be as braue as they can . But if once they be at their owne finding , all shall be laid out vpon apparell , but they will be as fine as master or mistresse : if not so costly , yet in shew as specious and braue . New fashions are as soone got vp by seruants as by masters and mistresses . What is the end of this , but to be thought as good as master or mistresse ? If the Queene of Sheba were now liuing , she would as much wonder at the disorder of seruants in these dayes , as then she wondred at the comely order of Solomons seruants . Let these proud seruants looke to it : for if God haue threatned to visit Princes children that walke in strange apparell , can seruants that so walke thinke to goe scot-free ? Thus much of seruants reuerence . Their obedience followeth . §. 10. Of seruants obedience . No inferiours are more bound to obedience then seruants : it is their maine , and most peculiar function , to obey their masters . It is therefore here in my text expresly mentioned ( Seruants obey your masters ) and all other duties are comprised vnder it . * The reasons alleadged to moue wiues and children to obey , ought much more to moue seruants . They who are contrary minded , who are rebellious , and disdaine to be vnder the authority of another , and are ready to say of their Master , We will not haue this man to reigne ouer vs , are fitter to liue among Anabaptists , then orthodoxall Christians . For to what end is the lawfulnesse of authoritie acknowledged , if subiection be not yeelded vnto it ? of the two a man were better be blinded with error , then not obey the truth which he knoweth . In handling this point of obedience , I will follow the same order , which I did in laying forth the obedience of wiues and children , and consider 1. The parts of seruants obedience wherein it consisteth . 2. The extent thereof , how farre it reacheth . The parts are two , One negatiue . Another affirmatiue . The negatiue is to abstaine from doing things of their owne head , without or against their masters consent . The affirmatiue is readily to yeeld to doe that which their masters would they should doe . §. 11. Of seruants forbearing to doe things without their masters consent . Seruants ought to forbeare doing of things on their owne heads without or against consent of their masters , because while the time of their seruice lasteth , they are not their owne , neither ought the things which they doe , to be for themselues : both their persons and their actions are all their masters : and the will of their master must be their rule and guide ( in things which are not against Gods will. ) The rite vsed vnder the Law of boaring a seruants eare , implied as much . Dauid therefore alluding vnto that rite , saith to God ( both of himselfe , and also of Christ , whom vnder a type he prefigured ) mine eares hast thou boared ; and from thence inferreth that he would do the will of God. We haue a notable patterne hereof in Abrahams seruant , who in a businesse committed to his charge propounds such scruples as came into his head to receiue direction from his master therein , lest he should be forced to doe something of his owne head without particular warrant from his master . This generall will the better be cleared , if it be exemplified in some particulars . Take therefore these instances gathered out of the Scriptures of things which seruants may not doe without their masters consent . 1. Seruants may not goe whither they will. The phrase which the Centurion vseth ( I say to one goe , and he goeth ) implieth , that except his master bid him goe , he ought not to goe . 2. They ought not to doe their owne businesse and affaires . It is noted of Iaakob being Labans seruant , that , though he had flockes of his owne , yet he fed his masters flockes , and committed his owne to his sonnes . 3. They ought not to doe what businesse they list themselues . Ahimaaz had a great desire to carrie the newes of Absoloms death to Dauid : yet without the leaue of Ioab his Captaine and master he would not doe it . The good mistresse giueth the portion to her maides , namely , the portion of worke : that therefore must they doe which she giueth them to doe . The seruants of the Centurion did euery one as by their master they were inioyned : and the seruants that had talents committed to them looked each of them to their owne talent . 4. They ought not to mary while the time of their couenant for seruice lasteth , vnlesse their master giue consent thereto . The law of God thus setteth forth the lawfull mariages of seruants , If his master haue giuen him a wife : whereby is implied ; that if a seruant mary , it must be with his masters consent . Obiect . The Apostle , without exception of seruants saith , to auoid fornication let euery man haue his wife , &c. Answ . He there sheweth what meanes the Lord hath sanctified to euery one to auoid fornication , but he doth not thereby giue libertie to euery one headily to vse that meanes against that order which God hath set downe . 2. That precept is giuen to such as are * in their owne power : for of children he saith , that n parents must see what is meet or not meet for them . 3. That which seruants are to gather from thence is , if need so require , to make knowne their desire to their master , and to vse all the good meanes they can by themselues or others to obtaine their masters consent . 5. They ought not to dispose their masters goods at their owne pleasure , no not for charitable vses . The Steward which wasted his masters goods was iustly put out of office for it . Yea he is called vniust for disposing some of them for his owne future maintenance ; therefore it was a point of iustice and vnlawfull . Obiect . The Lord commended him therein . Answ . He commended his wisdome , not his iniustice : his prouident care for the time to come , not the meanes of prouiding for himselfe . In regard of his generall prouidence he is commended : in regard of the particular meanes by deceiuing his master , he is called vniust . 6. They may not before their couenanted time be expired goe away from their master . When o Iaakob after long seruice had a minde to be gone , he asked leaue , and because his vncle and master would not willingly let him goe , he tarried still . Obiect . Afterwards p Iaakob priuily stole away from his master . Answ . 1. His couenanted time was out . 2. He had an expresse warrant from God to be gone . 3. His manner of going away is not to be iustified , and in that respect it is no good patterne . §. 12. Of the vnlawfull libertie which seruants take to themselues . Contrary to the forenamed limitations of seruants libertie are these , and such like lewd and licentious pranks as follow . 1. When seruants watch their times to goe whither they list , and their master not know it : as when their masters are seriously imployed , or abroad , or in bed . Thus that lewd seruant Gehazi watched his time to run after Naaman , thinking that his master should not know it . 2. When being bound to their masters seruice , they doe their owne businesse , and seeke their owne profit ; and that without their masters leaue . This aggrauated Gehazi his priuie stealing and withdrawing himselfe from his master , that he went to receiue gifts for himselfe . Many such lewd seruants there be , that knowing such and such friends of their master , who will be ready to doe any kindnesse for them , will vse their masters name to borow money , or get some other fauour , and neuer let their-masters know of it . 3. When seruants will chuse their owne worke , and doe that which liketh themselues best , or else doe nothing at all . Thus where many seruants be in one house together , if they be not in such places as they like themselues , they will mumble , and grumble , and doe nothing well . 4. When seruants , especially maid-seruants , that are bound , doe purposely mary to free themselues : because our lawes doe free a maide that is maried from her seruice to master and mistresse . 5. When they are liberall of their masters goods in giuing them away . Some thinke that because they are of the house , they may dispose the things of the house vpon charitable vses . But pretence of charitie is no excuse for iniustice . Seruants may giue notice to their masters or mistresses , that there are in the house such and such things meet to be giuen away , or that there are such and such poore folkes that stand in great need : but priuily without any consent at all , they may not giue away any thing of their masters . 6. When vpon discontent they run away from their masters . The two seruants of Shemei which run from their master are taxed for it by the holy Ghost . One simus that run from his master is sent backe againe by S. Paul : and Hagar is sent backe by an Angell . Obiect . What if master and mistresse be sharpe , rigorous , and cruell . Answ . An Angell from heauen giueth one answer , ( Submit thy selfe vnder her hands : ) And an Apostle giueth another , Be subiect with all feare to the froward : for conscience toward God endure griefe , suffering wrongfully . These faults are thus noted , that seruants taking notice of them , may the more carefully auoid them . §. 13. Of seruants obedience to their masters commandements . The affirmatiue and actiue part of seruants obedience , consisting in a ready yeelding to that which their masters will haue done , hath respect ( as the like kinde of childrens obedience ) to the Commandement , Instruction , Reproofe , and Correction of their master . I. A master hauing power to command his seruants , it is a dutie of seruants to obey their master therein . The particular worke which appertaineth to a seruant by vertue of his place is to haue an eie to his master , to see what he requireth at his hands . Dauid thus describes the property of good seruants , Their eies looke to the hand of their master . That looking , as it implieth an expectation of releefe and succour , so also a readinesse to receiue and execute any thing from them that they would haue done . The Centurion commendeth this duty in the example of his seruants , who euery one of them did what their master commanded them to doe . It is further commended in the examples of d Abrams seruant , e Eliahs seruant , and many others . Note how farre the Lord Christ exacteth this dutie of seruants ; f Though a seruant hath beene all day plowing ( a laborious and wearisome worke ) yet when he commeth home , his master commanding him to dresse his supper and wait , he must doe it . By all these proofes it appeareth , that if a master bid his seruant , come , goe , doe this , or that , he must obey . The contrary hereunto is the highest degree of disobedience , as when seruants refuse to be at their masters command , and to doe what they charge them to doe : as Ziba , who being commanded to saddle his masters Asse , went away and did it not : and Iobs seruants , who being called would not answer . Of all other offences this doth most prouoke masters : for it is a plaine contempt of their authoritie . §. 14. Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in matters of their calling . II. As a master hath power to command , so his dutie it is to instruct his seruants in the way of righteousnesse , and in that ciuill course of life wherein he is to walke . The dutie then of seruants it is , in both to hearken and be obedient vnto them . 1. Such seruants as are vnder masters to learne their trade , are bound many waies to hearken to them . 1. That for the time they may doe the better seruice to their masters . 2. That by learning a trade or skill in any good calling they may be the better able when the time of their seruice is out to maintaine themselues , to teach other seruants which shall be vnder them , and to doe the more good in the place where they shall liue . 3. That thus they may the better discharge a good conscience in that particular place wherein God hath set them . Contrary is the idle , sluggish , dull disposition of many seruants , who by reason of their carelesnesse and vntowardnesse in doing that which they are taught , vex and grieue their masters , yea and make them weary of instructing them . Many prentises spend all the time of their prentiship without reaping any good at all : they neuer proue their crafts masters : so many in the countrey liue vnder good husbands , many Clearks vnder good Lawyers , many maids vnder good houswiues , and that many yeares together , yet through their negligence get no good at all , whereas if they would haue beene attentiue and carefull , they might haue learned much . Enemies these are to their masters , to themselues , to the city and country where they liue , and to their friends and parents , especially if they haue any aliue . §. 15. Of seruants hearkning to their masters instructions in piety . Such seruants as haue religious masters who are carefull to instruct their houshold in the way of righteousnesse , ought to be obedient to their instructions : so were Iosuahs seruants , ( or else could not Iosuah haue vndertaken for them b as he did ) and the seruants of that Ruler of whom it was said that himselfe beleeued and all his house : and the seruants of Lidia , and of the Iay●er , concerning whom it is said , d She was baptised and her houshold : e he beleeued in God and all his house . Vnder these words house and houshold , none doubteth but that seruants are comprised . Now then if the seruants of these had not hearkened and yeelded to the instructions of their master and mistresse , would they haue beleeued in him in whom their masters beleeued , or beene baptised when their mistresse was ? The like may be gathered out of this phrase , f The Church in their house : for thereby is implied that all in the house were of the same faith that their master and mistresse were . It is expresly noted of the g Souldier that waited continually on Cornelius , that he was a deuout man , whereby it is presupposed that he hearkned to his masters instructions : for it is noted of the master also , that h he was a deuout man and feared God. The benefit which redoundeth to seruants by obeying such instructions , is vnspeakable : much more good may be got by following the spirituall directions of religious masters , then the witty and commodious directions of the wisest statesmen , and the skilfullest artists , or tradesmen that be : so as there is a double bond to binde seruants to obey this kinde of instructions : 1. The bond of duty . 2. The bond of profit and benefit to themselues . §. 16. Of Seruants faults contrary to obedience in matters of religion . Notwithstanding the forenamed duty be so behouefull to seruants , yet of all other duties is it by many least thought to be a duty , and most neglected , the cleane contrary for the most part being practised , as may appeare by these particulars . 1. Many seruants are of so impious a minde , as of all masters they will not serue such as are religious , and make conscience to instruct their seruants in the way to saluation : they had rather serue profane masters , meere worldlings , and very Papists . For why ? any thing better agreeth to corrupt nature then to be kept within the bounds of religion : few like the strait gate and narrow way that leadeth to life : for the god of this world so blindeth mens eies , that they cannot see the blessing of life at the end of this way , they only see the straitnesse of it : or if they should see it a farre off , yet they so sauour the things of the flesh , and of this present euill world , as they would not regard that which is so farre off . Now religious masters will endeuour what they can to keepe all their seruants in that narrow way ; but irreligious masters will suffer them to follow the sway of their owne corruption , to sweare , to profane the Sabboth , and spend that whole day in sleeping , sporting , eating and drinking : to goe to bed without prayer , or catechizing , or reading the word of God , and so to rise againe and goe about their businesse : to which holy duties , such deuout masters as Cornelius was , will hold their seruants . 2. Others that are placed by their friends vnder such deuout masters , or not knowing before hand the disposition of their masters , haue themselues couenanted with them to be their seruants , after they haue beene a while in the house , thinke their masters house a prison to them , muttering and murmuring against their strait keeping in , as they deeme it : and being called in to any religious exercise , they will be ready to say , I was not hired for this , neither am I bound to you herein , set me about your worke and I will doe it . 3. Some againe are the more negligent and dissolute in their businesse , because their masters are religious . It is a common complaint , that profane , worldly masters shal haue more seruice then religious and godly masters , yea though these giue better wages , diet and lodging then those . Many thinke the fault hereof to be in the master : but assuredly for the most part the fault is the corrupt disposition of seruants , that esteeme pleasure in sinne , and libertie thereunto more then wages , diet , and lodging : whereby they shew themselues impious against God , vngratefull to their masters , iniurious to themselues . Let this peruerse disposition be noted , that the rule of the Apostle verie pertinent to this point , may be the better obserued , They that haue beleeuing masters let them not despise them , but rather doe them seruice , because they are faithfull and beloued . §. 17. Of seruants obedience to reproofe and correction . The same directions may serue for yeelding to reproofe and correction : for they may both be brought to one head : and in the generall they doe both agree . For reproofe is a verball correction , and correction is a reall reproofe . The obedience which seruants in regard of these must shew to their masters is twofold . 1. Patiently to beare all manner of reproofe and correction . 2. Readily to amend that for which they are iustly reproued or corrected . For the first of these , seruants haue an expresse precept , enforced by many reasons in these words , Seruants be subiect to your masters with all feare , not only to the good and gentle , but also to the froward . For this is thanke worthy if a man for conscience toward God endure griefe , suffering wrongfully . For what glory is it if when ye be buffeted for your faults ye take it patiently ? but if whey ye doe well and suffer for it , ye take it patiently , this is acceptable with God. Here we see , 1. That correction is patiently to be borne by seruants : if correction , then much more reproofe . 2. That though correction be iniustly inflicted , yet it is patiently to be endured : therefore much more when it is deserued . 3. That buffeting and that of a froward master is to be borne : therefore much more lighter correction of a good and gentle master . Ioseph patiently endured b fetters , and yron chaines , and c imprisonment inflicted vpon him most vniustly , euen for his faithfulnesse to his master . Great was the recompence which God made vnto him : & assuredly God will recompence all the wrong , paine , and griefe , that in this case shall be endured for conscience sake . For the Apostle saith , that this is thankworthy , that is , worthy of praise and commendation , and so worthy of recompence and reward . Againe he saith that it is acceptable to God , so as God will recompence it , though men may account it but basenesse and blockishnesse : yea though vniust masters may thereupon take occasion the more to trample vpon , and insult ouer their seruants . To these motiues I may adde the rule of our Christian profession ( which is also intimated by the Apostle in these words , * Euen hereunto were ye called . ) For our Christian calling requireth all men to d giue place vnto wrath : e To turne the other cheeke when one is smitten : f To ouercome euill with goodnesse . g If all Christians must shew such patience to all men , euen their equals : how much more seruants to masters ? The Apostle commendeth to seruants the example of Christ in this case : he was reuiled and much he suffered , and that most iniuriously , and yet patiently did he beare all : if seruants thus suffer with him , they also shall reigne with him . §. 18. Of the extremes contrary to seruants patient bearing of reproofe and correction . Patient bearing of rebuke and blowes , seemeth an hard saying to most seruants : they cannot endure to heare it : for their minde and carriage is cleane contrary thereunto . 1. Some being but reproued , though iustly , are ready to answer againe , and to chop word for word : a sinne b expresly forbidden . It seemeth by the Apostles expresse mentioning of it , that answering againe hath beene an old euill quality in seruants . Obiect . If a master vniustly reproue his seruant , and the seruant answer not againe , he wittingly suffereth his master to continue in his error , and so maketh himselfe accessary to his masters sinne . Answ . There is difference betwixt a spightfull , reuengefull contradicting of that which is spoken , and an humble , mild , reuerend , seasonable apologie for that which is vniustly censured . This is lawfull : but that is forbidden . 2. Others scorne to be corrected : which disdaine they manifest many waies : as 1. By muttering , and saying they came not for that end . But though that were not the maine end of their subiection , yet is it a meanes to keepe them vnder subiection : and therefore to be endured by them . 2. By running away , as * Hagar . 3. By strugling and striuing with their master or mistresse : and taking the staffe or wand by the end : or by holding the hands of those that correct them . Obiect . Shall I suffer my selfe wrongfully to be beaten , when I can helpe my selfe and hinder it ? Answ . 1. Seruants may not be their owne Iudges whether their correction be iust or vniust : for men are so prone to sooth themselues and to extenuate the euill actions which they doe , as if they be not corrected till they thinke it iust , they would neuer be corrected . 2. To endure punishment ( that I may vse Saint Peters word ) is not otherwaies thanke-worthy . If iustly thou beest punished , thou hast but thy desert . If forcibly so as thou canst not resist , necessity maketh thee beare it . The sturdiest theeues that be , being pinnied , suffer themselues to be turned ouer , because they see a necessity . But Christ ( whose e example in this case is set before seruants ) f could haue freed himselfe but would not . If seruants endure for conscience sake , they will not resist , though they be able . 3. Others if they be smitten by master or mistresse , will giue as much as they receiue , they will smite againe : a practise vnbeseeming any Christian , but most vnseemely for Christian seruants : who manifest thereby a despight of Gods image and power in their masters . 4. Others are so possessed with a deuill , as they will seeke all the reuenge they can , if they be corrected : whence it commeth to passe that some hot , heady , hardy youth , sticke not to challenge their masters into the field : and others , more maliciously minded , secretly endeuour to take away the life of their masters . Many that haue not the opportunity to practise such villanies , doe notwithstanding in their hearts wish their masters destruction , and make most fearefull imprecations against them ; whereby they make themselues guilty of blood before God. §. 19. Of seruants amending that for which they are iustly reproued or corrected . More then patience is required of them that are deseruedly rebuked or corrected for their faults : namely * repentance , and amendment . Thus shall the smart and paine which seruants endure , be as good physicke vnto them , and turne to their good . True amendment of former faults may make one a better seruant then he was before he committed those faults : witnesse that which Saint Paul saith of Onesimus , b in time past he was to thee vnprofitable , but now profitable to thee and me . Contrary is their disposition , who notwithstanding all rebuke and correction goe on still in their euill and lewd courses : and continue to prouoke their master more and more , and so make them adde blow vnto blow , and stroke vnto stroke , till they haue no hope of them , but are forced to put them out of doores . This commeth either from a scornfull , disdainfull stomach ( for c a scorner heareth not rebuke ) or from a base , seruile , stupid , blockish , brutish nature , that is not moued with any smart or paine , like a restie iade that will not stirre though he be whipt or beaten neuer so much . d Solomon implieth thus much by putting into one leash an horse , an asse , and a foole : meaning by a foole a scornfull , blockish seruant : to whose backe a rod is as a whip to an horse : of such a foole he saith , that e an hundred stripes enter not into him : and againe , f Though thou shouldest bray a foole in a morter among wheat with a pestle , yet will not his foolishnesse depart from him . But what shall we say of such as for rebuke and correction are the worse ? What , but that shame , beggery , and some ignominious death or other is like to befall them . Hitherto of the kindes of seruants duties . The next point respecteth the manner of performing them . §. 20. Of seruing with trembling . The Manner how seruants ought to performe their duties is noted in foure phrases : The first whereof is this , with feare and trembling . Feare is both as a fountaine from whence all other duties flow : and also as a sawce to season them all . Commonly the season and sauour of waters commeth from the fountaine : which Saint Iames implieth , where he saith , no fountaine doth yeeld salt water and fresh : for if the fountaine be salt , the streames issuing from thence will be salt : and fresh , if the fountaine be fresh : so if feare be seated in the heart of seruants , all their obedience and submission will be seasoned therewith . Let therefore seruants here learne by their manner of performing all their duties , to declare that there is a true seruant-like feare seated in their hearts . Hereof I shall need say no more then what hath beene * before deliuered . The other word * trembling added to feare , addeth emphasis , shewing that it is no small feare that is required of seruants : and it giueth them to wit that their masters hauing a power to punish them , they must so carrie themselues as they prouoke not their master to wrath , but be very carefull and circumspect to auoid his displeasure , that they giue him no iust occasion of offence . This care had that seruant of Dauid which first espied Absolom hanging in a tree , and told Ioab thereof : he so feared the displeasure of the king his master , as to gaine a thousand shekels of siluer he durst not kill Absolom . The like is noted of Obadiah , who was afraid to tell his master Ahab where Eliah was , left his master might haue thought he had mocked him , if the Spirit had carried Eliah away . This trembling feare is needfull in regard of the small loue that seruants commonly beare to their masters . There are not those motiues to stirre vp loue in seruants to their masters , as in children to their parents : except therefore through awe and dread they be kept in compasse , they will exceedingly transgresse : and because this is so needfull , seruants must labour to nourish it , as a meanes to keepe them from ouer-much boldnesse . Contrary on the one side is a proud despising of a masters authority ( saying , if not with their mouthes , yet in their heart , as Gaal of Abimelech , who is he that we should serue him ? or as those that despised the gouernment of Christ their master , m we will not haue this man to reigne ouer vs : and againe , n let vs breake his bonds asunder , and cast away his cords from vs. ) And on the other side a wretched carelessenesse , not fearing any punishment before they feele it : like to many desperate theeues that no whit feare the power of the Iudge , but desperatly say , we haue but one death to pay . The authority of God himselfe is despised , and his reuenging hand is lightly regarded by such proud and desperate seruants : so as their sinne is no small sinne . §. 21. Of seruing with sincerity . The second branch concerning the manner of seruants performing their dutie is in these words , in singlenesse of heart , so as all must be performed with an honest and vpright heart : whatsoeuer yee doe , doe it heartily , saith the Apostle to seruants in another place . Thus did Ioseph in singlenesse of heart serue his master : instance his refusing to abuse his mistresse in a priuate chamber when she desired it , and no other body was in the house . Happy were it for masters to haue such seruants : then might they take no more care then Potiphar did , but put all that they haue into their seruants hands . Neither would this rare vertue in seruants be only profitable to their masters , but also very comfortable to themselues , and bring them much peace of conscience . Contrary is hypocriticall seruice : when seruants haue a heart , and a heart , making shew-of one heart outwardly , and haue another , euen a cleane contrary heart within them . Such an one was Gehazi , who came in and stood before his master , as if he had performed some good seruice for his master , when he had most highly dishonoured him : and such an one was Iudas who carried as faire a face to his master as any of the disciples , and yet was an arrant traitor : for when he was thought to goe out to buy prouision for his master , he went to betray him . All eye-seruice is contrary to the forenamed singlenesse of heart : when seruants are diligent so long as their masters eye is on them : like little children that will doe any thing their mother will haue them doe , while her eye is vpon them ; but nothing , when her backe is turned . The world is full of such eye-seruing seruants , who while their masters are present , will be as busie as Bees : but if he be away , then either idling at home , or gadding abroad , or nothing but wrangling , and eating , and drinking with the drunken ; like that lewd seruant whom Christ noteth in the parable Let the iudgement denounced against him be noted of such seruants . §. 22. Of seruing for conscience sake . The third branch of the manner of seruants performing their dutie is in these words , as vnto Christ , as the seruants of Christ , doing the will of God , as to the Lord : all which doe set forth a good conscience , or such seruice as is performed for conscience sake , or for the Lords sake , which is all one : because the conscience hath an eye only to the Lord , to his will , and to his ordinance . Though there were no other motiue in the world to moue them to obey their masters , yet their conscience to God would moue them . Such was Iosephs manner of seruing his master , as the reason which he himselfe rendreth to his mistresse sheweth , How can I doe this great wickednesse , and sinne against God ? The prayer which Abrahams seruant made to God , and the thanks which he rendred to him for blessing his iourney , shew , that he serued his master for the Lords sake . It is more cleare then needs be proued , that such was Iaakobs seruice to his master . This is the rather to be noted of Christian seruants , because herein lieth the greatest difference betwixt beleeuing seruants , and others : others may serue with feare and trembling , in singlenesse of heart , and with good will ; but only Saints doe seruice as to Christ for conscience sake : If this be not that which only they aime at , yet assuredly they doe chiefly and principally aime at it : which maketh them not to content themselues with doing the thing , but to endeuour to doe it after the best manner that they can , so as God may best accept thereof : whereby as they approue themselues to God , so they doe much good to their masters , and bring much comfort vnto their owne soules . Contrary is the minde of most , who doe all the seruice which they doe on by-respects : they may performe much dutie , and it may be doe much good to their masters ; and thereupon they may get good wages at their masters hands , and extraordinarie recompence also , and liue in much quiet vnder them : but no reward can they looke for at Gods hands : so as I may say to such seruants , as Christ said to those who did all to haue glory of men , They haue their reward . §. 23. Of seruants willingnesse to performe their dutie . The fourth branch respecting the manner of seruants performing their dutie , is noted in this phrase , with good will. This good will of a seruant to his master , hath respect partly to the disposition of the seruant , and so it implieth willingnesse and cheerefulnesse ; and partly to the benefit of the master , and so it implieth faithfulnesse . Of willingnesse to doe that dutie which belongeth to a seruant , Christ Iesus ( who b tooke vpon him the forme of a seruant ) hath made himselfe a worthy patterne . c I delight to doe thy will , saith he to him that sent him : and againe , d My meat is to doe the will of him that sent me , and to finish his worke . Doth not a man eat his meat willingly , with delight and cheerefulnesse ? euen so did Christ the worke of him that sent him . So cheerefully did Iaakob serue his Vncle Laban , that e seuen yeeres seemed to him but a few dayes . Obiect . The reason thereof was the loue he had to Rachel . 1. Answ . This was one reason , but not the only reason : had he not borne good will to his Vncle and Master , as well as loue to his wife , the time might haue seemed tedious enough : but both meeting together , made the time passe away the better . 2. Answ . If the loue he had to Rachel made him doe his seruice so cheerefully : then if seruants loue God , for whose sake they ought to doe their seruice , it will cheerefully be done . 1. That which the Apostle applieth to giuing of almes ( 2 Cor. 9. 7. ) may be extended to all manner of duties which God requireth , God loueth cheerefulnesse : that worke therefore which is not seasoned therewith God regardeth not . 2. As cheerefulnesse maketh God the better to like the worke , so it maketh the worke much more easie to him that doth it . Our common prouerbe noteth as much , Nothing is hard to a willing minde . 3. * Let there be cheerefulnesse in a seruants minde , and he is as free as his master : for such a seruant is the Lords freeman ( 1 Cor. 7. 22. ) and when he cannot be made free of his master , he doth after a manner make his seruice free . Haue an eye to God , to his acceptation , and remuneration , and it will quicken thy spirit . Mans reward maketh poore men glad of worke , and cheerefull in doing their worke : it is as sugar to sharpe wine . Tradesmen , Physitians , Lawyers , all sorts of men , are by gaine drawne on with great willingnesse to take great paines . Should not Gods recompence of our paines make vs much more willing ? Surely it would , if we had such an eye of faith as Moses had , thereby to see the recompence of reward which he saw . Contrary is heauinesse of spirit , and discontentednesse of minde , when seruants doe their seruice lowringly , grudgingly , by compulsion ( as Beares are brought to a stake ) and of necessitie , as slaues in a galley . Such seruice must needs be vntowardly done : but though outwardly it be well done , yet can the doer haue little comfort therein , because God accepteth it not . §. 24. Of seruants quicknesse and diligence in their seruice . Seruants , in testimonie of their willingnesse and cheerefulnesse , must be both quicke and diligent in their seruice : for these are effects of willingnesse . Quicknesse hath respect to the time of doing a thing . Diligence to the paines that is taken about it . He that is quicke in his seruice taketh vp no more time about one thing then must needs ; but is ready to doe one thing after another ; and thus doth much more seruice . It is expresly noted of Rebekah , that she b hasted , and let downe her pitcher : and hasted and emptied her pitcher , and ran againe to the Well . And Abrahams seruant hauing made what speed he could to the place whither he was sent , c would not eat till he had told his errand : after he had told it , if he had not sped , d he would not haue delaied time , but haue gone againe forthwith : when he had well dispatched all , e he would not stay vpon any complements , but hasted away to his master . f Ahimaaz stroue with Cushi who should soonest bring their message to their master : and Ahimaaz outstript Cushi , for he had a very willing minde to doe the businesse . The manner of charge which Elisha gaue to his seruant , implieth all the speed he could make : it was this , g Gird vp thy loynes , goe thy way : if thou meet any by the way , salute him not : and if any salute thee , answer him not againe . He that is diligent in his seruice , will not only be quicke for the time , but also hold on , and imploy all the labour and paines that he can for the well effecting of that which he is to doe . That generall charge laid vpon all men , in particular appertaineth to a seruant ( h In the sweat of thy face thou shalt eat bread ) and that which Solomon noteth ( i what soeuer thine hand findeth to doe , doe it with thy might . ) Great was Iaakobs diligence ( for he saith of himselfe in doing his masters businesse , k In the day the drought consumed me , and the frost by night , and my sleepe departed from mine eyes . ) Great also was the diligence of those shepherds , that l kept watch ouer their flocke by night : and of * those seruants , that by their paines doubled the talents which were committed to them . As diligence is by these and many like examples commended vnto vs , so is it further set forth by the many promises which are made vnto it , as , m The hand of the diligent maketh rich : n The recompence of a mans hands shall be rendred vnto him : o The hand of the diligent shall be are rule : * In all labour there is profit . The worke which seruants are by their master appointed to doe , is to them the worke of God : whereupon the Apostle saith to seruants as well as to others , p as God hath called euery one , so let him walke : but the worke of God is to be done with all diligence : for q Cursed is he that doth the worke of the Lord negligently . Contrary is the idlenesse , lazinesse , slothfulnesse , and sluggishnesse of seruants . These are faults too too common . Solomon much inueigheth against these vices , setting them forth in their kinde , and setting downe the many mischiefes that follow thereupon . Thus he deciphereth them ; r The slothfull man saith , there is a Lion in the way ( that is , he pretendeth vnlikely danger ) As the doore turneth vpon the hinges , so a slothfull man vpon his bed . The slothfull hideth his hand in his bosome , it grieueth him to bring it againe to his mouth . ſ Yet a little sleepe , a little slumber , a little folding of the hands to sleepe . These are the mischiefes which he noteth to come from idlenesse and sloth , t Pouertie , u Seruitude , x Fruitlesse wishes and desires , y Hunger , z Beggerie , a Death . And to shew what small ioy or comfort masters may haue in slothfull seruants , he compareth them to vineger and smoke , which are as irkesome to the teeth and eyes as can be : b As vineger ( saith he ) is to the teeth , and smoke to the eyes , so is the sluggard to them that send him . And because many idle packs thinke and say they doe no hurt , he further saith , that c He that is slothfull in his worke is brother to him that is a great waster : in which respect Christ stileth a slothfull seruant , d a wicked and vnprofitable seruant : and giueth him the portion of those who doe much hurt . How lightly soeuer many seruants esteeme idlenesse and sloth , the truth is , that it is a plaine theft . For the best seruice that seruants can doe , is due to their master : and they ought to be as diligent in their masters worke , as if it were their owne . So as it is not enough to auoid idlenesse in doing nothing at all , but they must take heed that they be not slothfull in doing something : for as good not at all , as neuer a whit the better . I haue the further pressed this point , because it is noted as a blemish in such seruants as professe religion to be most lazie and negligent , least sedulous and diligent . Much of that time which they should spend about their masters businesse ( which is their particular calling ) they spend in prating about state , and Church-businesse , ( matters not belonging to them . ) Thus they make their masters weary of their seruice ; and by reason thereof they are oft shifted from house to house , and as rolling stones , gather no mosse : they neither learne skill , whereby they may , when they are of themselues , maintaine themselues , and doe good to others : nor lay vp any stocke or portion , as others which are diligent doe : yea they get such an habit of idlenesse , as they can neuer shake it off againe : for they who are slothfull being vnder masters , seldome proue diligent when they are for themselues . In these is Solomons prouerbe verified , The talke of the lips tendeth only to penury . §. 25. Of seruants faithfulnesse . It was * before noted , that the good will here required of seruants to their masters had respect to the profit and benefit which seruants by their seruice might bring to their masters : and in that respect it compriseth faithfulnesse vnder it , Faithfulnesse ( I say ) whereby seruants doe well discharge that trust which is committed to them . Expresly it is commanded to seruants , b To shew all good faithfulnesse , and c it is required in stewards that a man be found faithfull . The phrase which is vsed of Moses , d He was faithfull as a seruant , sheweth that faithfulnesse by a kinde of proprietie appertaineth to a seruant : and e where Christ coupleth these two , good and faithfull , he giueth vs to vnderstand that a seruants goodnesse consisteth in his faithfulnesse . Great is the benefit that by seruants faithfulnesse will redound both to master and seruant . The benefit which commeth to the master , Solomon noteth in this prouerbe , As the cold of snow ( is very acceptable , comfortable and profitable ) in the time of haruest ( when men are euen sweltered with heat ) so is a faithfull messenger to them that send him : for he refresheth the soule of his masters : and againe in this , A faithfull ambassadour is health , that is , he bringeth safetie to his master . The benefit which redoundeth to the seruant himselfe by his faithfulnesse Christ noteth in this his approbation , and remuneration thereof , Well done thou good and faithfull seruant , thou hast beene faithfull ouer a few things , I will make thee Ruler ouer many things , enter thou into the ioy of thy Lord. Euery seruant shall be called to his account : if not by his master on earth , yet by his master in heauen : he will say to euery one , Giue an account of thy stewardship : now then if seruants haue not beene faithfull , what other discharge can they looke for , then that which the wicked , slothfull , and vnprofitable seruant ( who hid his talent in a napkin ) receiued , namely this , Cast ye the vnprofitable seruant into outer darknesse , there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth . Let all vnfaithfull seruants note this : for to faithfulnesse is contrary all vnfaithfulnesse , as negligence , deceit , theeuery , treachery , and such like vices . Much dammage , disgrace , and vexation is brought by such seruants to masters : and better it had beene that they neuer had come into a mans house . But that the point of faithfulnesse may be the better discerned , and obserued , I will exemplifie it in seuen particulars whereabout it ought especially to be exercised , which are , 1. The Goods , 2. The Businesses and affaires , 3. The Counsels and secrets , 4. The other seruants , 5. the Children , 6. The Bedfellow , 7. The Person of their master or mistresse . §. 26. Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters goods . Two things are required of seruants to testifie their faithfulnesse about their masters goods . 1. A safe keeping of them . 2. An increasing of them . 1. Whatsoeuer is committed by masters vnto their seruants , they must so carefully preserue , as it be not lost , spoiled , or impaired vnder their hands , whether they be things within doores , or without . I may to this purpose not vnfitly apply that charge vnto seruants which in another case the Apostle gaue to Timothy , b Keepe that which is committed to thy trust : the Metaphor is taken from seruants , and so sheweth what is their dutie . Great was Iosephs faithfulnesse in this kinde , which made his master c put all that he had into his hand . So great was Iackobs faithfulnesse , that d in twentie yeeres his masters ewes and she Goats , being vnder his hand , cast not their young , nor the Rammes were deuoured : if any thing were torne of beasts , he brought it not to his master , but bare the losse of it himselfe . If seruants espie any dammage or hurt done by others to their masters goods , they must redresse it , if they can , or at least make it knowne to their masters , that he may giue order for the redressing of it : as the seruants of him that sowed good seed among which tares were sowed , mentioned in the parable . Masters that put seruants in trust , securely goe about other affaires , and looke not themselues to those goods which are vnder their seruants custodie , which is to be presupposed they would doe , if they trusted not their seruants . Great reason therefore it is that seruants be carefull of those things which are so committed to them . 2. They ought further to doe what lieth in them to aduance their masters estate , and to increase his stocke . The little which Laban had was by Iaakobs faithfulnesse in this kinde increased vnto a multitude . The talents which were committed to the two faithfull seruants were by their industrie increased to as many more . So as it is not sufficient for seruants not to impaire their masters estate , but they must better it : for he that kept safe his masters talent , and gaue him his owne againe , was counted an vnprofitable seruant , and receiued the doome of wasters . Most masters take seruants for their aduantage and benefit , for it is but little ease for a master to prouide diet and lodging for many seruants , and to giue them wages , if they reape no profit and benefit by them . §. 27. Of seruants carelesnesse ouer their masters goods . Contrary to seruants fidelitie in safe keeping their masters goods committed to their charge is Carelesnesse and negligence in suffering losse and dammage come to their masters as in the fields , when they looke not to his sences and gats : or neglect his cattell so as they be stolne , or suffer diseases to grow vpon them , or giue them not fodder and water in due season . Or in the house , when they leaue doores or windowes open , and theeues come in and take away , or hooke out their masters goods : or carelesly leaue the fire , or let candles burne so as the house may be see on fire : or suffer houshold-stuffe , and apparell to lie till it be moth-eaten or otherwise spoiled : or suffer any thing in the house to be broken : or victuall to lie in corners moulding , or to be cast vp and downe for dogs and cats . When Christ so increased the bread and fish , wherewith many thousands were fed , that many fragments were left , he bid his disciples gather vp what remained , and rendred this reason , that nothing be lost . The dammage which may come by seruants carelesnesse , may be more then euer they can be able to make satisfaction for : and therefore they ought the more carefully to preuent it . §. 28. Of seruants fraud . Contrary to the other branch of seruants faithfulnesse in increasing their masters estate , is all manner of theft and fraud , whether it be by retaining that which is due to their masters , or by purloining from them that which they haue . b The Apostle expresly forbiddeth seruants to purloine . The word translated purloine , is the same whereby the fraud of Ananias is set forth , who c kept backe part of the price of a possession which they sold : so as thereby is forbidden not only open and manifest stealth , as pilfering money out of their masters purse , chest , or counter ; or conueying away their corne , wares , or any other goods : but also putting more into the account of expences then hath beene expended , or into the account of debts lesse then is due ( as the vniust steward , who for a debt of an hundred measures of oyle put in fiftie , and for an hundred of wheat put in fourescore ) or spending more then needs , or bringing in ill company into the house when their masters are absent , and entertaining them on their masters cost , or concealing part of the price which hath beene taken for any wares , or borowing money in their masters names , or taking greater fees then their masters wot of , or receiuing bribes or gifts which their masters refuse ( as Gehazi ) or hiring others to doe their worke vpon their masters cost , or inueagling away their masters customers , or purloining away other mens goods committed to their masters trust ( as Taylors seruants , who thereby both much discredit their masters , and also hinder their custome . ) Obiect . What if masters detaine their seruants wages ? may they not by priuy meanes right themselues ? Answ . A masters sinne is no warrant to make seruants answer sinne with sinne . The law is as open for seruants as for masters : if not , Gods eares are open for their complaints : he can and will redresse all , or here or hereafter . f Note Iaakobs example . Many make this a iust pretence : but whether it be iust or no , it is not safe to open this gap of deceit . These and such like kindes of deceit are the more hainous sinnes because of that trust which masters repose in seruants : for they violate both the bond of iustice , and of fidelity also . If a seruant imbezill or defraud his master of any of his goods to the value of forty shillings , he is adiudged a felon by our statute law . §. 29. Of seruants faithfulnesse in the businesses which they are to dispatch for their masters . In the businesses which masters commit to the care of their seruants to be dispatched by them , they must doe their best endeuour that all may prosper vnder their hands : as it is noted of Ioseph , a he was a prosperous man : we haue not only a pregnant proofe , but also an excellent direction for this point , in the b example of Abrahams seruant , who was very faithfull in dispatching the businesse of fetching a wife for Isaak : therein let these particulars be noted . 1. He feared God : the whole cariage of that businesse testifieth as much . There is a double bond to tie seruants hereunto : one in respect of themselues , that in the thing which they doe they may be accepted of God : another in respect of their masters , that their masters businesse may prosper vnder their hands : God prospereth such as feare him , in all things they take in hand : instance the examples of c Iaakob , d Ioseph , and e Dauid . 2. He f called vpon God to prosper his endeuours : now prayer is the best meanes that possibly can be vsed to obtaine any blessing from the Lord. Without it all our endeuours are vaine ( g It is in vaine to rise vp early and sit vp late , and to eat the bread of carefulnesse , except Gods blessing accompany all . ) 3. He h gaue thankes when he saw the Lord begin to prosper that he tooke in hand : thanksgiuing for the beginning of a blessing , is an effectuall meanes for continuance of that blessing : yea it is also an effectuall meanes to moue God to prosper other things that we take in hand : so as , if seruants desire to prosper in all the affaires which they vndertake for their masters , they must render thanks for the first successe which he hath giuen , and so for the second , third , fourth , and for euery successe . 4. He tooke all the opportunities he could : i when he saw a maid to inquire of , he ran to her , and inquired what was behouefull for his matter : when he had ground to thinke she was the maid , k he presented gifts to her : l so soone as he was brought to the house , he falls vpon the matter for which he came , euen before he did eat any thing : after matters to his liking were concluded , he maketh no tarrying , but with all speed carieth the maid to Isaak . In a word , he omitted nothing that in the vttermost of his wisdome he conceiued to be behouefull for that matter : more he could not haue done , if the matter had wholly concerned himselfe . I shall need no further to vrge this point , then by setting this patterne before seruants . Contrary is their disposition who care not whether the things which they doe for their master prosper or no : if they haue taken any paines therein , so as their master cannot say they haue altogether neglected it , there is all that they care for . If it succeed not well , they will say they are not in Gods place to make euery thing which is done to prosper . But though the whole blessing rest in God , yet hath he sanctified meanes for obtaining his blessing ( as faith , prayer , thanksgiuing , and the like ) which because they vse not , they faile in this point of faithfulnesse . Nay further , they vse those things which doe mainly hinder and keepe away Gods blessing , and in stead thereof bring a curse vpon all they do , as profanenesse , vncleannesse , drunkennesse , and all manner of riotousnesse , yea despising Gods word and holy ordinances , reproaching his Saints , taking his name in vaine by swearing , forswearing , and blaspheming , lying , also backbiting , pilfering , and other like vices . These irreligious and wicked seruants , as they sinne against God and their owne soules , so also against their master : it is not for masters profit to keepe such seruants . §. 30. Of seruants faithfulnesse in keeping their masters secrets , and concealing their infirmities . By reason of that neare bond which is betwixt master and seruants , and their neare and continuall abiding together , and the many imploiments which masters haue for their seruants , seruants come to know many of their masters secrets : faithfulnesse therefore requireth to keepe them close . Prouided that they be not such secrets as tend to the dishonour of God , or to the danger of the Commonwealth and Church , no nor of a priuate person : for a Ionathan is commended for discouering the mischiefe which Saul had secretly intended against Dauid . For proofe of the point , note what Solomon saith , b He that is of a faithfull spirit concealeth a matter : namely , a secret matter . Note also how faithfull c Ieremiah was in keeping Zedekiahs counsell : though the Princes enquired after it , yet would he not reueale it to them . To this head is to be referred a faithfull concealing of masters infirmities : for the best that be are subiect to many : and seruants which are vnder their masters roofe continually waiting on them , cannot chuse but espie many : if herein seruants be not faithfull , masters were better be without seruants in their houses . Contrary to keeping close the secrets of masters , is blabbing abroad all such things as seruants know concerning their masters : which is too common a fault : for when seruants of diuers houses men or maids meet together , all their talke for the most part is of their masters and mistresses , whereby it commeth to passe that all the secrets of an house are soone knowne about the whole towne or city . Solomon stileth such an one a tale-bearer : A tale-bearer , saith he , reuealeth secrets : or , he that reuealeth secrets is a tale-bearer : for many of Solomons prouerbs are conuertible , they may be turned either way . Now note how Solomon noteth out the mischiefes that tale-bearers worke : The words of a tale-bearer are as wounds , ( they wound the pretious name and credit of a man ) and they goe downe into the innermost part of the belly , that is , they doe , as it were , strike thorow the very heart of a man. Againe he noteth them to be the cause of all strise , and to raise discord betwixt chiefe friends : and in that respect fitly resembleth them to wood which is the very fuell of fire . What enemies then are such seruants to an house ? They are euen as treacherous spies , the most dangerous enemies that be . Thus we see that this is no light sinne : yet is it so much the more odious when masters and mistresses infirmities ( the publishing whereof may much impaire their credit ) are made knowne . §. 31. Of seruants faithfulnesse in helping one another . Where many fellow seruants are together , faithfulnesse requireth that one be helpfull to another in what they may ; as by good example , good counsell , incouragement in good courses , disswasion from lewd and wicked practises , peace and vnity , with the like . The Lord Christ expresly calleth such an one a faithfull seruant , and pronounceth him blessed . Example and aduice of ones equall preuaileth much with another , so as a fellow seruant may in this kinde doe more good then the master himselfe : and if by his meanes he bring his fellow seruants to be faithfull , his owne faithfulnesse is doubled and trebled ; and his master receiueth a double and treble benefit thereby : namely the benefit of this good seruants faithfulnesse , and the benefit of all the other seruants faithfulnesse whom he hath made faithfull . Contrary is their practise who by their ill example corrupt their fellowes ( as that euill seruant , who , when his master was away , did eat and drinke with the drunken , that is , did cause others to be drunken with him ) or by ill counsell draw one another on to euill ( as the sonnes of Iaakob , who when they saw Ioseph a farre off , said one to another , Behold this dreamer commeth , come now and let us slay him , &c. and as they , who , when they saw their masters sonne , said among themselues , This is the heire , come let us kill him , and let us seize on his inheritance ) or are euer quarrelling with their fellowes , and smiting them ( as that forenamed euill seruant whom the Lord threatneth to cut off ) or disswade one another from obedience and subiection ( as they who said , Let us breake their bonds asunder , and cast away their cords from vs ; and as Sheba , who said , we haue no part in Dauid : euery man to his tents O Israel . ) These faults are very rife among seruants : whence it commeth to passe that there are so few good , and so many bad seruants : too true is this prouerbe , One skabbed sheepe mars a whole flocke . Let there be in a great family one seruant that is profane , proud , riotous , stout , rebellious , or otherwise vicious , and all will soone be like him . Among other parts of vnfaithfulnesse in this kinde one of the most monstrous ( which yet is too too frequent ) is to allure one another to vncleannesse , and men and maids to defile one another . We shewed * before , that it was vnlawfull for seruants during the time of their seruice to marie without their masters consent : how abominable then is it to defile one another ? The sinne is doubled being betwixt seruants : for as it is a beastly sin in it selfe , so in the forenamed respect it is greatly dishonourable to their master and his house : besides that the maid so defiled is oft disabled to doe her seruice well : nay many times the charge of the childe lieth vpon the master . Thus shame and dishonour , griefe and vexation , losse and dammage all meet together , the more to gall & pierce him to the very heart . Is not this then a great part of vnfaithfulnesse ? Deserueth it not to be seuerely punished , and that openly , and publikely with shame and smart too , tht others may take warning thereby ? Many vse meanes to escape the reuenging hand of man : but though they escape mans hand , they shall be sure to meet with Gods heauy vengeance : whoremongers God will iudge . Daily experience sheweth what misery * such wretches bring themselues vnto , and how God meeteth with them , and that most fearefully . §. 32. Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters children . Great faithfulnesse may seruants manifest to their masters in and about their children : as while they are young and not able to looke to themselues , to be tender ouer them , and well to tend them : maids especially neatly to handle and looke to them , and cleanly to bring them vp : and they that haue a particular charge of them , to seeke their good in euery thing they can , and giue them their due portion : and ( because children are much in seruants company ) to vse in their hearing such speech as may minister grace to them , and to teach them good things , and ( when they grow to some ripenesse of yeares ) to beare a reuerend respect to them , and esteeme them their betters because they are their masters children . It is noted of Abrahams seruant , that he called his masters sonne , Master . Children are deare to parents : the honour and kindnesse done to them they account as done to themselues : this kinde of faithfulnesse therefore must needs be highly esteemed by masters in their seruants : and assuredly it is a great meanes to worke a good respect in masters towards them . Yet Contrarily doe many seruants carrie themselues towards their masters children , as is apparent by these particulars . 1. Some in their cariage are very hoggish and churlish to their masters children when their parents are out of sight . 2. Others are very carelesse of them , and tend them very sluttishly , not caring how they goe : whereby they oft procure great displeasure from their master and mistresse . 3. Others get from their masters children what they can : and depriue them of their allowance , turning it to their owne gaine . 4. Others exceedingly corrupt their masters children with their filthy and corrupt communication : teaching them to sweare , blaspheme , and vse all manner of vncleane speeches : thus is that prouerbe verified , euill communications corrupt good manners . Children oft times in their young yeeres learne such ill language and behauiour of lewd seruants , as their parents can neuer get them to leaue againe : so as they may curse the day that euer such seruants came into their house . 5. Others allure them to stage-plaies , to dice-houses , and other like places , which are the very bane of youth : and draw them to spend in riot such allowance as their parents allow them , yea and beyond that allowance , so as they runne in debt , and get such an habit of spending , as at length they make away their whole estate . 6. Others inueagle their affections : and oft draw them to folly and vncleannesse . This filthy kinde of vnfaithfulnesse is so much worse then that which was * before noted betwixt fellow seruants , by how much neerer and dearer children are to their parents then seruants to their masters . 7. Others that dare not commit this abominable wickednesse , sticke not to doe that which is little better , namely to draw them on to be contracted , yea and maried to them often times , and that priuily without consent of their parents : whereby parents affections are oft so alienated from their children , as they will not acknowledge them for children , but cleane cast them off . These are the fruits of this lewd kinde of vnfaithfulnesse in seruants . §. 33. Of seruants faithfulnesse in regard of their masters , or mistresses bed-fellow . So faithfull ought seruants to be to their masters and mistresses , that if one of them should labour to vse a seruant in any manner of deceit to the other , the seruant ought not to yeeld . As if a master should moue his maid priuily to take away iewels , plate , mony , linnen , or any such thing as is in her mistresse custody . It skilleth not that the master hath the chiefest power ouer all the goods : a secret taking of them away without the priuity of the mistresse in whose custody they are , is in the seruant deceit , and a point of vnfaithfulnesse . Much lesse ought any seruants be moued by their mistresse priuily to take away their masters corne , wares , or any goods for her priuate vse . Of the two this is the greater part of vnfaithfulnesse . If such deceit ought not to be vsed about any goods , much lesse about the body of master or mistresse . As if a master should allure his maid to commit folly with him , or a mistresse her man , both their conscience to God , and also their faithfulnesse to their master or mistresse should make them vtterly to refuse it , and to giue no place to any such temptation . a Ioseph is propounded as a patterne herein : and against the suggestion of his mistresse he rendreth the two forenamed reasons : his conscience to God in these words , how can I doe this great wickednesse and sinne against God ? His faithfulnesse to his master in these , He hath not kept backe any thing from me but thee , how then &c. To this head may be referred seruants faithfulnesse in making knowne to their master the sinne of his wife , and to their mistresse the sinne of her husband , especially if it be such a sinne as may tend to the ruine of the familie , and that by the knowledge thereof , the party that is not blinded and besotted with the sinne , but rather free from it , may be a meanes to redresse it . Thus b Nabals seruants made knowne to Abigail the churlishnesse of Nabal towards Dauids seruants : by which means the mischiefe intended against the house was preuented . Thus if seruants know that their master intendeth some mortall reuenge against another , to tell his wife thereof in time , may be great faithfulnesse : or if they know their mistresse hath appointed to goe away priuily from her husband , to tell him of it , is a part of faithfulnesse . This may be applied to many other like cases . The contrary is yeelding to masters or mistresses in any point of deceit one against another : whereunto seruants are too prone , because they thinke to be boulstred out by the authoritie of the partie that setteth them on worke to deceiue . But no authoritie can be a warrant for any deceit , or wickednesse . §. 34. Of seruants faithfulnesse about their masters persons . Masters and Mistresses are flesh and bloud as well as seruants , and so subiect to weaknesse , sicknesse , old age , and other distresses , wherein they may stand in great need of seruants helpe : seruants therefore must be faithfull in affording them the best helpe that they can . Sauls seruants did a part of faithfulnesse to their master , when , he being vexed with an euill spirit , a they inquired after meanes to ease him . So did Dauids seruants , when he being bedred , b they sought out one to cherish him . It was a point of faithfulnesse in Naamans c maid , to tell her mistresse of a meanes whereby her master might be cured of his leprosie : and in his d seruants , to perswade him to vse the meanes prescribed by the Prophet . Contrary is a seruants vngratefull and inhumane leauing of his master in his time of need , as the seruants of Iob did : for when the hand of God lay heauy vpon him , and all his goods were taken from him , and his bodie full of sore boiles , e they that dwelt in his house , and his maids counted him for a stranger : and he was an aliant in their sight : he called his seruant , and he gaue him no answer . So did f Ziba leaue Mephibosheth in his greatest need : and g the Disciples flie from their master Iesus Christ . But what shall we say of those that take occasion from their masters impotencie to murder him themselues , as h Rechab and Baanah ; or to betray him to his enemies , as i Indas betrayed the Lord Christ ? what , but that such traiterous seruants may looke for such ends . §. 35. Of the meanes to make seruants faithfull . Among many other meanes to make seruants faithfull to their master , and carefull to performe other duties sincerely , willingly , cheerefully , and diligently , as hath before beene noted , this is one of the most generall , namely , that seruants , in all things they doe for their master , make their masters case their owne , and so doe for him as they would for themselues , or as they would haue their owne seruants doe for them . The generall rule of the Law is , a Loue thy neighbour as thy selfe ; and b whatsoeuer you would that men should doe to you , doe you even so to them . If thus euery man must respect another , yea though he be a stranger , then much more must seruants respect their master , because all that they can doe is after an especiall manner as a debt due to their masters : in which respect Christ saith , that when they haue done all that is commanded , they haue but done their dutie . This I haue the rather noted , because the practise of most seruants is contrary thereunto . For while they worke for their masters , they will cry out that they are ouer-burdened , and tired with that worke which they will easily goe thorow withall when they worke for themselues . They that while they worke for their master , must be called to it againe and againe , and forced to stand to it , and to hold out till it be done , what paines will they take , how early will they rise , how late will they sit vp , how diligent will they be for themselues ? When Iourneymen receiue increase of wages according to the worke which they doe , they will dispatch more then a prentise that hath but cloth , food , and lodging . Againe , many that in their masters goods are very lauish , and wastfull , when they come to befor themselues are very sparing , sauing , and prouident . What doe these things argue but that seruants doe not beare to their masters that minde which they should : they doe not for them as they would doe for themselues . Very requisite it is therefore that the forenamed generall rule be obserued . Hitherto of the seuerall kindes of seruants duties , and of the manner of performing them . It remaineth to speake both of the extent of their duties , and also of the restraint of that extent . §. 36. Of seruants endeuour to make their iudgement agree with their masters . The extent of seruants duties is in my text only implied vnder this indefinite particle ( Obey ) ( which being not restrained to any particulars , must be extended to euery thing ) but in other places it is expresly laid downe in these generall termes , a Obey in all things , b Please well in all things . It is not therefore sufficient that seruants performe their duties well in some things , they must doe it in all things , yea in things that may be against their owne minde and liking , if their master will haue it so . For this end let seruants note these two rules . The same extent and restraint that was * before noted in laying forth the duties of other inferiors , is here also to be obserued in the duties of seruants : for therein they all agree . The same rules therfore that were before set downe , may here againe be applied . I refer the reader to those places for a more large amplification of the generals : and here I will content my selfe with adding such particular proofes as are most proper and pertinent to seruants . 1. That they labour to bring their iudgement to the bent of their masters iudgement , and to thinke that meet and good which he doth . Thus the c seruant of the Leuire which thought it meetest to turne into one of the Cities of the Iebusites to lodge there , because the day was far spent , when he saw his master to be of another minde , yeelded to him . So did d those seruants yeeld to their master , who at first thought it vnmeet that he that had ten talents should haue one peece more : and e those seruants also , that at first thought it meet that the tares should be plucked vp from the wheat . This rule is to be obserued in the particular points before deliuered , as the worke which seruants doe , and the manner of doing it , their apparell , their allowance , yea and in the correction which their master giueth them , and the rest . Contrary is that great conceit which many seruants haue of their owne iudgement , wit , and wisdome , thinking themselues wiser then their masters ; as Gehazi , who opposing his owne wit to his masters wisdome , said , f Behold my master hath spared Naaman this Syrian , in not receiuing at his hands that which he brought : but as the Lord liueth , I will runne after him , and take somewhat of him . This was also a fault in g the children of the Prophets , that would not rest on Elishas iudgement , but importuned him against his minde to send some to seeke the bodie of Eliah . This selfe-conceit is the cause of many mischiefes : as of discontentednesse at the worke their master appointeth them , and at the allowance of meat and drinke which they haue ; of much libertie they take to themselues , of pride in apparell , and other vices before noted : if the forenamed rule were duely obserued , many of those mischiefes would be auoided , and much better obedience yeelded . §. 37. Of seruants yeelding to doe such things at their masters command , as they cannot thinke to be most meet . The second rule which seruants must obserue is this , that Though they cannot in their iudgement thinke that fit to be done which their master will haue done , yet vpon his peremptorie command they must yeeld to the doing of it : It appeareth by Peters answer to Christ that he did so , for being commanded to let downe his net for a draught , thus he answereth , Master , we haue toyled all the night , and haue taken nothing ( here he sheweth that his opinion was that it would be in vaine to let downe their nets ) neuerthelesse at thy word I will let downe the net ( here is his obedience against his opinion . ) More cleare is the example of Ioab for this purpose : when the King commanded him to number the people , he declared that he thought it a very vnmeet thing to doe , by this phrase , Why doth my Lord the King delight in this thing ? yet against his iudgement he yeelded to the Kings peremptorie command , for it is said , that the Kings word preuailed against Ioab . Obiect . This is no fit example , because Ioab sinned in obeying . Answ . Ioab cannot iustly be charged with sinne , because it was not simply vnlawfull to number the people . Dauids sinne was not in the act of numbring the people , but in his minde which moued him to doe it : for there was no iust cause to doe it : only pride and curiositie moued him , as may be gathered out of his owne reason in these words , that I may know the number of the people . To doe such a thing only to know it , was curiositie . But why would he know it ? surely on a proud conceit that he had so many worthies , so many Captaines , so many men of warre . Out of Ioabs example seruants may here learne in humilitie and reuerence to render some reasons to moue their master not to presse vpon them that which they thinke to be vnmeet ; but yet if their master will not hearken to their reasons , but stand vpon his authoritie , his word must preuaile . Contrary is their peremptorinesse , who by no meanes will be drawne to doe any thing at their masters command , which they themselues thinke not most meet to be done . Such an one is that foole whom Solomon thus describeth , Though thou shouldest bray a foole in a morter among wheat with a pestle , yet will not his foolishnesse depart from him . These fooles bring much mischiefe vpon their owne pates in disobeying their masters : for exceedingly they prouoke his wrath who hath power to take vengeance of them . Neither let them thinke to receiue comfort in their suffering , because they refuse an vnmeet thing , for meetnesse is not a sufficient warrant against vnlawfulnesse . To disobey in a thing which lawfully may be done , is vnlawfull : if therefore the pretext be only an vnmeet thing , meetnesse is preferred before lawfulnesse , and vnlawfulnesse lesse accounted of then vnmeetnesse . §. 38. Of seruants forbearing to obey their master against God. That the extent of seruants obedience be not too farre stretched , the Apostle setteth downe an excellent limitation thereof : and that in these foure phrases , As vnto Christ , As the seruants of Christ , Doing the will of God , As to the Lord ; all which doe shew that the Obedience which seruants yeeld to their master must be such as may stand with their obedience to Christ . So that if masters command their seruants neuer so peremptorily to doe any vnlawfull thing , that is , any thing forbidden by Gods word , they may not yeeld to it . The midwiues of the Hebrew women did well in refusing to doe any thing to helpe forward the murderous practises of the King of Egypt in slaying all the male-children of the Hebrewes : it is expresly said , that they feared God and did not as the King commanded them : so as their disobedience in this kinde was a token of their feare of God. In this case Ioseph is commended for not hearkening to his mistresse : and the seruants of Saul for refusing to slaie the Lords Priests at their masters command . Thus if a master should command his seruant to kill , to steale , to forsweare himselfe , to lie , to vse false measures and weights , to goe to masse , or doe any other vnlawfull thing , he ought not obey him . Againe , if masters forbid their seruants to doe that which God hath commanded them to doe , they must , notwithstanding their masters prohibition , doe it . The Rulers of Israel forbid the Apostles to preach , yet because Christ had commanded them to preach , they would not forbeare : nor would Daniel forbeare to pray to God , though the King and Nobles by expresse decree forbad him . So if a profane or popish master shall forbid his seruant to goe to Church , or to heare the word , or to take the Sacrament , or to dwell with his wife if he be maried , or to make restitution of that which he hath fraudulently gotten , or any other bounden dutie , herein they must say , we ought to obey God rather then men . For when masters command and forbid any thing against God , they goe beyond their commission , and therein their authoritie ceaseth . Contrary to this restraint is both a parasiticall pleasing of masters : and also a base feare of them . It is the property of a parasite to say what a master will haue him say , and denie what he will haue him denie , and so to doe what he will haue him to doe . Doeg that fawning dog at Sauls word slew all the Lords Priests : and Absoloms seruants at his word killed Amnon : for all the reason which they had to commit that murder was this speech of their master , haue not I commanded you ? So prone are seruants to sooth their masters , as there is no sinne so horrible which at their masters command they will not be ready to doe . Thus is that verified which the Prophet long since foretold , like master like seruant , like mistresse like maid . It is also the propertie of base fearefull seruants to doe nothing but what their master will haue them doe , and to forbeare any dutie , though neuer so necessary , that he forbiddeth them to doe . What dutie more necessary then praier ? We are commanded to pray continually : yet the seruants of Darius were content to forbeare that dutie thirtie daies together , because it was against the decree of their Lord and King. The like is noted of the people in Christs time , they durst not make open profession of Christ for feare of the Iewes . So in our daies many seruants there be that dare not make profession of the Gospell , nor goe to Church , nor read the word , nor performe other holy religious duties , which they know to be bounden duties , for feare of their masters . Had not then the Apostle iust cause to strike so much vpon this string as here he hath done , expresly forbidding eie-seruice , man-pleasing , and doing seruice to men , namely in opposition to God ? §. 39. Of seruants chusing good masters . As a iust consequence following from the forenamed extent and restraint of seruants duties , I may further gather these two lessons for seruants . 1. It is very behouefull that seruants make choice of good masters : at least if it be in their power to chuse . 2. It is behouefull that they continue and abide vnder good masters : at least if they continue seruants , and abide vnder any masters . That these consequences iustly follow as aforesaid , is euident : for seeing seruants are bound to obey in all things which are not against God , and must obey in nothing but what is in the Lord , it is very requisite that seruants be vnder such masters as beare the Image of God in the inward disposition , and grace of their heart , as well as in their outward function and place : and will goe along with God in vsing their authoritie , commanding nothing but what a seruant may doe with a good conscience , and without transgressing against God : and forbidding nothing that God hath bound a seruant to doe . There will be comfort in seruing such masters : and our obedience to them will be obedience to God. Such masters therefore must be chosen . Yea and with such must seruants abide , ( if not with the very same , yet with such as they are , of the same disposition ) for if they goe to other , their former comfort will be taken away , and their seruitude will seeme so much the more miserable , by how much more knowledge and experience they haue had of the benefit of their former libertie ( for we may well call seruice vnder vnconscionable masters seruitude , and in opposition thereunto , seruice vnder religious masters , libertie . ) He therefore that hath a master that is faithfull , due respect had to his authoritie , must loue him as a father , and so abide with him . For choice of good masters , note what is a recorded of many of the Egyptians and other people : they left their owne countrie , and went out with the Israelites : what should moue them but conscience of the true God whom they knew that Israel serued ? Now many of these went out as seruants , as may be gathered from those many b lawes which were made in the behalfe of seruants that were strangers , and in speciall that were Egyptians . The knowledge which c Ruth had that Naomi her mother in law serued the true God , moued her to leaue her owne countrie , and to goe as a seruant with Naomi . For abiding with good masters we haue a worthy patterne in the twelue Disciples . d When many of Christs Disciples at large , went backe , and walked no more with him , Christ asking the twelue whether they also would goe away , Peter in the name of all the rest answered , Lord to whom shall we goe ? Thou hast the words of eternall life . Contrary is the minde and practise of many seruants : they neuer inquire after the religious disposition of their master , nor care though he be popish , or profane , so they may haue good wages , diet and lodging : and yet by this meanes , if at least there be any sparke of Gods feare in their heart , they cast themselues vpon many sore temptations , and bring themselues into many hard straits , and dangerous snares . And , if God open their eies to see that wretched condition whereinto they haue implunged themselues , they will be forced to crie out and complaine as Dauid did , when he was in forraine countries where he could not freely serue his God , e Woe is me that I soiourne in Mesech , that I dwell in the tents of Kedar . Much more contrary is their minde and disposition who refuse to serue religious masters , and shun them most of all : or being in their seruice are neuer quiet till they be out of it againe . Of these we spake * before . Hitherto haue we dealt about seruants duties . The reasons which the Apostle rendreth to enforce those duties remaine to be declared . §. 40. Of the first motiue , the place of masters . The first reason which the Apostle vseth to inforce seruants duties is implied vnder this phrase , as to Christ ; it intimateth the place of a master , which is to be in Christs stead . In this respect the title Lord is giuen to a master . The word which the Apostle vseth in Greeke is that which in the new testament answereth to that proper Hebrew name of God Iehouah , and it setteth forth the absolute soueraignty of God , and power ouer all creatures : b which power Because the Father hath giuen to his sonne as Mediator , God-man , he is called the c one or only Lord : and because masters by vertue of their office and place beare Christs image , and stand in his stead , by communication of Christs authority to them , they are called Lords , yea also d Gods ( for that which a Magistrate is in the Common-wealth a master is in the family ) Hence it followeth that seruants in performing duty to their master performe duty to Christ , and in rebelling against their master they rebell against Christ ; as the Lord said to Samuel of the peoples reiecting his gouernment , they haue not reiected thee , but they haue reiected me that I should not raigne ouer them . Is not this a strong motiue to prouoke seruants to all duty , and to restraine them from rebellion ? if it be well weighed what Christ is , it cannot be but a weighty reason . For though masters should neither reward their good seruice , nor reuenge their ill seruice , yet will Christ doe both . §. 41. Of the second motiue , the place of seruants . The second reason is implied vnder this phrase , as seruants of Christ : it noteth the place of a seruant : which though it may seeme to be a meane and base place , yet is it indeed an honourable place . Men count it an honour to bee seruants to a King : but Christ is higher then all Kings . On this ground the Apostle saith , Art thou called being a seruant ? care not for it : and that vpon this reason , He that is called in the Lord being a seruant , is the Lords freeman . This reason is to be noted against the conceit that most haue of a seruants place , that it is so meane and base as there can be no honour nor comfort in doing the duties thereof . But that is a foolish , and vniust conceit : looke to Christ the highest master , and there is as much honour , and comfort in doing the duties of the lowest seruants place , as of the highest masters . §. 42. Of the third motiue , Gods will. The third reason is implied vnder this phrase , doing the will of God , which declareth the ground of seruants subiection . God in his word hath plainly made it knowne that it is his pleasure that they who are vnder the authority of masters should obey them , therefore as seruants would please God , they must obey : if they refuse to obey , they thwart the will of God. This also is a motiue of moment : for Gods will is that marke which euery one ought to aime at , and it is much vrged by the Holy Ghost , as a generall reason to all duty in these and such like phrases , b This is the will of God , c So is the will of God : vpon which ground we are exhorted to d vnderstand , and to e proue what is the will of God. Good reason there is to presse this reason : for 1. Gods will is the very ground of goodnesse : things are therefore good because they are agreeable to Gods will : Gods will giueth the very being to goodnesse . 2. Gods will is a rule to square all our actions by , euen as the kings statutes and proclamations are to his subiects . 3. It is a perfect rule ( the law of the Lord is perfect ) so as we may be sure not to swerue , if we hold close thereunto . 4. It is a sufficient rule , it will giue euery one ( and among other , seruants ) direction how to carry themselues in euery thing they take in hand , yea in euery thing that appertaineth to them . For , Gods word is giuen to make vs perfect , thorowly furnished vnto all good workes . 5. It is a good warrant to iustifie vs in all our actions : so as , going along with it , we need not care what any man can say against vs. If a man be sure that he haue statute law , or the kings proclamation on his side , he is bold . From this reason which is of such weight , I gather two propositions to adde force to this motiue . 1. That seruants obey their masters , is no arbitrary matter , but a necessary duty : not left to his will whether he will doe it or no , but a thing whereunto he is bound : and that not only by ciuill constitutions of men , but also by a diuine institution of God : so as it is not only a matter of ciuill policy , but also of conscience , to be done for conscience sake . 2. That no creature can dispence with seruants , so as they should be exempted from doing their duty to their master . If they could , they were greater then God , and their will aboue Gods will. Among creatures , masters themselues are to be reckoned : now because it is Gods will that seruants should be in subiection , their masters cannot exempt them from it . Masters may let them goe free : but retaining them as seruants , they cannot exempt them from a seruants subiection . Wherefore though masters be carelesse in exacting dutie , yet let seruants be conscionable in yeelding duty , because it is Gods will. §. 43. Of the fourth reason , the reward of good seruice . The fourth reason is plainly and largely expressed in these words , Knowing that whatsoeuer good thing any man doth , the same shall he receiue of the Lord , whether he be bond or free . The generall summe whereof is a Declaration of the reward of good seruice . To which purpose saith the Apostle to seruants in another place , Of the Lordye shall receiue a reward . This first is to be noted to adde force to the former reasons . For if any aske , what if masters stand in Christs stead , what maketh that to the purpose ? surely it maketh much to moue seruants : because masters stand in his roome who will reward that which is done for his sake . If againe they aske , what benefit is it to be Christs seruant ? it may be answered , very great : for Christ will reward all his seruants . If further it be asked , what is gotten by doing Gods will ? Answ . Euen that which all aime at , reward for seruice . As this addeth weight to al the other reasons , so is it in it selfe a weighty reason , as weighty as any can be to our corrupt nature . Hope of reward is it which maketh all sorts of people to take the paines which they doe in their seuerall places . But hauing * before handled this generall point of reward , I will here more distinctly shew what kinde of reward it is wherewith the Lord will recompence the good seruice of faithfull seruants . Gods reward is both of temporall and eternall blessings . The temporall blessings which heretofore God hath bestowed on faithfull seruants , and which on that ground other like seruants may expect , are these especially . 1. He will moue masters to respect such seruants , as he moued Ahash-verosh to recompence the fidelity of Mordecai . 2. If masters faile therein , he will moue strangers to recompence them : as he moued c the Iaylor to fauour Ioseph when his master had cast him in prison : and d Pharaoh to aduance him to great dignity . 3. To draw the hearts of their masters and others the more vnto them , he will make the things which they take in hand to prosper . Thus did he blesse e Ioseph , and f Abrahams seruant . 4. In dealing for themselues he will blesse their labours , as he blessed g Iaakobs . 5. He will , when they come to keepe seruants , prouide such seruants for them , as they were to their masters . h In Egypt God blessed Ioseph with a faithfull seruant . Dauid , who k ventured his life to saue his fathers sheepe , had l many seruants that ventured their liues for him . To this purpose may be applied that prouerbe which Christ oft vseth , m with what measure yee mete shall it be measured to you againe . The eternall reward is expressed in this phrase , n the reward of the inheritance , for that inheritance is meant which Christ mentioneth in this clause , o Come ye blessed of my Father , inherit the kingdome prepared for you from the beginning of the world , and Saint Peter in this , p an inheritance incorruptible , and vndesiled , and that fadeth not away , reserued in heauen . What can be more said ? What shall not be vndergone for this reward ? How willingly doe prentises passe ouer their prentiship in hope of a temporarie freedome of an earthly citie ? q Many yeares seruice were but as a few daies to Iaakob because he liked his reward . But behold here a greater reward , which we must needs like much better . If this be not sufficient to moue seruants to all dutie , I know not what can be sufficient . The eighth Treatise . Duties of Masters . §. 1. Of the heads of Masters duties . EPHES. 6. 9. And yee Masters doe the same things vnto them : forbearing threatning : Knowing that your Master also is in heauen : neither is there respect of persons with him . IN the last place the duties of masters are declared by the Apostle , and that in this verse , where he noteth , 1. The kindes of their duties . 2. A Reason to enforce the same . The kindes are set forth Generally ( doe the same things . ) Particularly ( forbearing threatning . ) The reason is taken from that subiection wherein masters are to an higher master ( knowing that your master also . ) And it is amplified , 1. By the equall subiection of masters and seruants to that master ( your also . ) 2. By the place where that master is ( in heauen . ) 3. By his property , in this phrase ( neither is there respect of persons with him . ) Because the seuerall duties of masters are here but pointed at , and infolded vnder generall termes , I will ( as in former treatises hath beene done ) propound a distinct order , whereby we may the better finde out their duties , and handle them one after another . All may be drawne vnto these two heads . 1. Care in choosing good seruants . 2. Conscience in well vsing them . For well vsing their seruants , masters must haue an eie to their place , and authority : and in respect thereof , 1. Wisely maintaine their authority . 2. Rightly manage the same . The well managing of their authority is generally noted in this phrase , doe the same things : but more particularly in a another place referred to these two branches 1. Iustice . 2. Equity . Of these in order . §. 2. Of masters choosing good seruants . The first thing that a man , who taketh vpon him to be a master , must take care of , is to entertaine good seruants into his seruice . b Mine eies ( saith Dauid ) shall be vpon the faithfull of the land , that they may dwell with me : he that walketh in a perfect way he shall serue me . What doth this phrase ( mine eies shall be vpon the faithfull ) imply , but that he will diligently and carefully inquire after such : yea mine eies ( saith he ) not another mans eies : he would not put all the trust vpon others : he would himselfe make what proofe and triall he could . Such an emphasis hath this phrase ( mine eies ) where c Iob saith ; whom I shall see for my selfe , and mine eies shall behold , and not another for me . 1. Seruants are of all other things ( except wife and children ) of best and greatest vse . If then men be carefull in well choosing other things , as houses , land , houshold-stuffe , horses , and all manner of cattell ( as men are very circumspect therein ) should they not be much more carefull in well choosing seruants ? 2. Thus will masters shew that they seeke , and aime at the good of their family : yea and in their family at the good of Church and common-wealth : for good members of a family are likeliest to proue profitable to Church & common-wealth . 3. When good seruants are chosen , there is hope of receiuing the more good from them , and doing more good vnto them . They will be pliable to all good admonition , docible by all good instruction , seruiceable in all things they take in hand . Obiect . A master may make a bad seruant to become a good one . Answ . There is a great hazard and venture therein , especially if they be growne to ripe yeares : no creature is easily tamed , or brought from the naturall course it hath taken , after it is growne vp : a bough that hath growne crooked many yeares together will hardly be made straight . It is not in mans power to make a bad seruant good : neither can man expect Gods blessing therein , when he obserueth not a right course warranted by God. Quest . What course is fittest for choice of seruants ? 1. If they be young , see how they haue beene from their infancy educated . Great is the benefit of good education : and much good may be expected from thence : for it is the means which God hath sanctified for good . But if they be growne to ripe yeares , choose such as feare God , such were they vpon whom d Dauid cast his eies . On this ground did e Saint Paul aduise Philemon to take Onesimus againe , because grace was then wrought in his heart . 1. Gods feare is the ground of all good obedience and faithfulnesse : note the examples of such good and faithfull seruants as are commended in Scripture , and you shall finde them all to feare God. 2. Such will not only be diligent in their worke , but they will also faithfully call vpon God to prosper those things which they take in hand in their masters behalfe , instance the example of f Abrahams seruant . 3. God will haue such respect vnto those seruants which feare his name , as for their sakes to blesse their masters house . Thus was g Potiphars house blessed for Iosephs sake . 2. Make some triall of their fitnesse to that calling , worke and seruice whereunto thou shalt put them . From such there may be hope of profit & benefit by their seruice . h Laban made triall of Iaakob a moneth before he couenanted for any long continuance . 3. Take such especially as are of meane and poore estate , and know not how to maintaine themselues but by seruice . Thus will a double worke of charitie be done therein : and thus maist thou looke for better seruice : for commonly such are most industrious , and most obedient to their masters . Obiect . When men haue taken all the care they can in their choice , they may be deceiued . Answ . 1. Then much more likely is it , that if they be carelesse therein , they shall be deceiued . 2. Diligent , and wise search , is a meanes to finde out the disposition and abilitie of seruants . 3. If hauing vsed the meanes men be deceiued , they may haue the more comfort in bearing the crosse , because they haue not wittingly or carelesly pulled it vpon themselues . §. 3. Of masters carelesnesse in chusing seruants . Contrary is their carelesnesse , who are ready to receiue any into their house , euen Atheists , Papists , swearers , swaggerers , profane wretches , vncleane persons , and such like , against whom Dauid protesteth , he would not haue him that worketh deceit to dwell in his house ; nor him that telleth lies to tarrie in his sight . They who entertaine such , make their houses to be cages of vncleane birds , seminaries of wicked persons , and vnprofitable members : for one scabbed sheepe is enough to infect a whole flocke . No maruell though many mischiefes fall vpon such a familie : for a man were as good bring so many Snakes and Adders into his house , as such persons : yea with them is brought Gods curse . Can any good then be looked for ? Such foolish masters regard neither themselues , nor their houshold : no nor yet Church or Common-wealth . If none would entertaine such , it might be a meanes to make them alter their condition . Many are not only carelesse in chusing good seruants , but also except against such as are religious ; thinking it a matter of reproach to entertaine them . By which conceit they oft put away Gods blessing from their house . Others so stand vpon a great portion of money with a prentise , or a clerke , or other seruant , as they will take none but rich mens children . Whence it commeth to passe , that this point ( which is a great point ) of charitie is neglected : persons most vnfit for seruice are entertained , and such many times as scorne to doe seruice . Thus their masters grow weary of them : the seruants lose their time : neuer proue to be their crafts-masters : and their parents repent the giuing of such a portion with them . §. 4. Of masters maintaining their authoritie . After that masters haue chosen good seruants , their dutie is well to vse them : which by reason of the difference betwixt masters and seruants cannot be well done , except masters wisely maintaine their authoritie . A master therefore must be able a well to rule his owne house : this is a dutie which the Apostle in particular requireth of a Bishop , who is master of an house , but it appertaineth in generall to all masters of families . Women also who by vertue of their places are mistresses , are commanded b to guide the house , or to rule , and performe the part of a mistresse therein . It was the c Centurions commendation , that hauing seruants vnder him , he had them at his command . 1. Gods image and authoritie , which a master carrieth , is thus preserued . 2. Thus shall a master haue much better seruice done . Not one seruant of a thousand , that is not kept vnder authoritie , will doe good seruice . A like dutie to this was enioyned to an husband in relation to a wife , Treat . 4. §. 4. Some of the reasons , directions , & other points there handled , may be here applied . Read it therefore . For this end three things are to be obserued . 1. That masters carrie themselues worthy of their place , and worthy of that honour which is due to them : which may best be done by making themselues a patterne of such good things as in their places appertaine to them . d I and my house will feare the Lord , saith Iosuah : he would not only put them to it , but he also would doe it , he would goe before them . I will behaue my selfe wisely , I will walke within my house with a perfect heart , saith Dauid . 2. That masters keepe their seruants in awe and feare . e Children must be kept in subiection : much more seruants . 3. That masters doe the things which they doe in their cariage towards their seruants with authoritie : Command , forbid , rebuke ( to vse f the Apostles phrase ) with all authoritie . The manner of speech which the Centurion vsed to his seruants ( g goe , come , doe this ) sauour of authoritie . So the Church taking vpon her the person of a mistresse , vseth a word of authoritie , h I charge you not to doe this . §. 5. Of masters making their authoritie to be despised . The aberrations in the defect contrary to the forenamed dutie and point of wisdome , are many : as 1. When masters carrie themselues basely and abiectly before their seruants : being light in their behauiour , foolish in their cariage , giuen to drunkennesse , vncleannesse , lewd companie , and other vices . Nabal was such an one : for his seruant could say of him , a He is a sonne of Belial . Dauid , though he did not giue himselfe ouer to such foule sinnes as these are , yet he oft failed in an vnseemly cariage before his seruants , as when b he changed his behauiour , and fained himselfe mad , and scrabled on doores , and let his spittle fall downe vpon his beard : and againe , c when he gaue such reines to his passion , for the death of his traiterous sonne Absolom , as his people being ashamed stole away from him , and Ioab his seruant was forced roundly to tell him of it , saying , thou hast shamed this day the faces of all thy seruants , &c. Mistresses oft lose their authoritie by conspiring with their seruants to goe abroad , take away goods , gossip , and doe such other like things priuily without their husbands consent : they make themselues thereby slaues to their seruants , not daring to doe any thing which may offend their seruants , lest they should discouer to their masters such lewd pranks as their Mistresses did . 2. When masters are too remisse and sheepish : intreating and praying their seruants to doe such things as they ought to command and require at their hands : and if it be not done , all their remedie is patience , or else to doe it themselues . Howsoeuer this might be counted meeknesse , and gentlenesse towards equals and strangers , ouer whom we haue no authoritie , yet towards seruants it is too base remisnesse : yea it is a relin quishing of that power which God hath giuen , and whereof God will take an account . 3. When masters suffer their seruants to be their companions , playing , drinking , reuelling with them , and saying ( as it is in the prouerbe ) haile fellowes met . Thus seruants oft take libertie to presume aboue their master : for men are naturally prone to ambition ; and , if an inch be giuen , they will take an ell . They who in this kinde so farre debase themselues , as to giue their seruants power ouer their owne bodie , doe make both themselues , and their true lawfull bedfellow to be despised : themselues , in that such seruants as are so made one flesh , will thinke to keepe in awe such a master or mistresse , as they haue knowne , through feare of reuealing that sinne : their bedfellow , in that such seruants will thinke to be maintained , and boulstered vp by the master or mistresse , whom they haue so knowne . On this ground was d Sarah despised in the eyes of Hagar her maid . 4. When masters are ouer-ruled by their seruants to doe any vniust or vnlawfull thing : as e Ioash , who by his seruants was drawne to idolatrie : and f Zedekiah , who gaue the Prophet Ieremiah into his seruants hands , vsing this base and abiect speech , f The King is not he that can doe any thing against you . Thus will seruants soone proue masters : and if they once come to this high pitch to rule , rather then to be ruled , they will quickly proue intolerable . For g this is one of the foure things noted by the Wiseman , which the earth cannot beare , namely , a seruant when he reigneth : and h this is one of those euils which proceed from rulers , that seruants ride vpon horses , that is , are aduanced aboue their place and degree : whence it followeth , that h Gouernours walke as seruants vpon the earth , they are deiected below their place and degree . It falleth out in this case betwixt seruants and masters , as betwixt scoales , or ballances ; if the weights that vse to lie in one ballance to keepe it downe be taken away , it will suddenly flie vp , and so the other ballance will be kept downe . §. 6. Of masters too great rigour . The contrary in the excesse is too great rigour and aufterity manifested in looke , speech , and actions . 1. In looke , when a master cannot cast a good eie on his seruant . i Iaakob was much discountenanced by the countenance of his master . Many masters by their continuall frowning browes , and fiery eies , doe much terrifie their seruants . 2. In speech , when masters cannot giue a good word to their seruants , but if they be moued neuer so little , cast vpon them all the reproachfull names that they can call to minde : little thinking of this fearfull doome , k Whosoeuer shall say , thou foole , shall be in danger of hell fire . Thus did Saul manifest a malitious and mischieuous minde against Ionathan and Dauid by the foule language he gaue . Some haue such a froward and peruerse tongue , as they can neuer speake directly to their seruants : but if they command or forbid a thing , they will doe it after such a manner as their seruant can scarce tell what they meane : and this not only when their seruant hath offended them , but in their best mood . So shrewish are others , as their tongues seldome lie still : but they are euer chiding vpon euery small occasion : whereby it commeth to passe that their seruants are no more moued with it , then the Doues , and Stares that continually abide in Belfraies , are moued with the ringing of bels . Such bitternesse also is mixed with the childings of many , as they belch out of their blacke mouthes , most direfull imprecations . What can be said of such tongues , but that they are l set on fire of hell ? As other aberrations wherein masters are reproued , are to be applied to mistresses , so this especially . For mistresses doe commonly most offend in shrewishnesse of speech . 3. In actions , when masters are too frequent , and too furious strikers : striking their seruants on euery occasion , not caring how they strike . In these and other like euidences of too much austeritie and plaine arrogancy masters forget that they are men . Though for outward order a master be more excellent then a seruant , yet as a man he ought to iudge himselfe equall . This extreme can be no good meanes to maintaine authoritie : but it is a plaine abuse thereof . Masters ought so to carrie themselues as their seruants may rather reuerence , then dread them . §. 7. Of masters commanding power restrained to things lawfull . That a master may the better know how to maintaine his authoritie , I will distinctly declare the extent of his power , and that in these foure particulars , 1. In Commanding . 2. In Correcting . 3. In ordering the mariage of their seruants . 4. In disposing their person . Within the lists of these two vertues Iustice and Equitie ( whereunto all the duties which masters owe their seruants shall * afterward be referred ) must the commanding power of masters be bounded . 1. Iustice requireth two things , 1. A restraint of masters commandements . 2. An execution thereof . The restraint is vnto Gods law , that a master command nothing against it , but what is agreeable to it . Abishai would faine haue had Dauids warrant to haue killed Saul : but Dauid was so farre from commanding him to doe it , as he kept him from it . Masters are but subordinate ministers vnder God : they must therefore command nothing against his law . As a Iudge , high-Sheriffe , and all other officers vnder the King , must make the Kings law the ground of all those things which they require of the Kings subiects : so masters must make Gods law the ground of all those things which they require of their seruants , who are also the seruants of Christ . Besides , to what purpose is it to command that which a seruant may and must refuse to doe ? But in no * vnlawfull thing may he obey . §. 8. Of masters presuming aboue their authoritie . Contrary is the arrogancie and presumption of many masters , who make their owne will the rule of their seruants obedience . This must needs be a leaden rule , which may be bowed this way , that way , and euery way , because of the flexible and variable humour of man. Hence is it that many most vile and horrible things are commanded , because they are agreeable to the commanders humour . Absolom bid his seruants commit a most detestable murder vpon his owne brother , and note how he presseth it , Haue not I commanded you ? More presumptuous is he that taketh vpon him to be the great commander of all Christians , the Pope of Rome , and other masters and gouernours of Iesuites , Friers , Monkes , and other like orders , who command such as are vnder their authoritie to commit treasons , raise rebellions , kill Kings , and doe other like execrable villanies . And to iustifie the Pope from whom all inferiour gouernours receiue their power , and by whose will they must be ruled , these blasphemous positions doe Papists hold of his power , He can doe all things of right as God. He is as God hauing on earth fulnesse of power . If he shall draw with him innumerable soules of men into hell , yet none may say to him , what doest thou ? Doth not the Apostles * description of that man of sinne , the sonne of perdition , agree to him of whom those things are spoken ? Is he not in Papists account , as God , shewing himselfe that he is God ? Which is further confirmed by that power which they giue him of making lawes to binde the conscience , and coining new articles of faith . Not only popish , but profane masters also too much exceed in this presumptuous vse of their power aboue their power : as they who enioyne their seruants to kill , to steale , to sweare , to forsweare , to lie , to giue false measures , and weights , to goe to masse , to profane the Sabbath , with other like sinnes . In all these , and all other things like to these , being against Gods law , masters haue no power to command : they goe aboue their commission : and shall accordingly answer for it . §. 9. Of masters commanding seruants to doe their dutie . 2. The execution of a masters commanding power consisteth in those things which God hath enioyned as bounden duties . These a master by vertue of his authoritie must command his seruants to doe : as to worship God , to sanctifie his Sabbath , to be diligent and conscionable in his calling , with other like duties , which God compriseth vnder these words , the way of the Lord , righteousnesse and iudgement : and saith that he knew that Abram would command his houshold to doe them . The charge giuen to masters in the fourth commandement concerning seruants , ( thou nor thy man-seruant , nor thy maid-seruant ) proueth as much . Iosiah is commended for causing his people to stand to the couenant of God. On this ground if a master haue seruants that are papists , separatists , or profane persons , he ought to command them , and cause them to goe to the holy ordinances of God. It is one of the principall ends why God hath giuen power and authoritie to some ouer others , that by their authoritie they may cause them which are vnder them to obserue the commandements of God : euen as inferiour officers haue authoritie giuen them , to see the Kings lawes kept . §. 10. Of the sinne of masters in suffering seruants to neglect their dutie . It is contrary to that commanding power which God hath giuen to masters , to suffer their seruants to omit , and neglect those bounden duties which God hath commanded them : as if a seruant be so popish or profane as to refuse to goe to the word , or Sacrament , or to performe any dutie whereunto he is bound , to let him alone . Though they themselues doe those duties , and though they doe not hinder and keepe their seruants from doing them , yet if they cause not their seruants also to doe them , they make themselues accessarie to their seruants sinne . Obiect . Euery mans conscience is free , and cannot be forced ; therefore masters may not compell seruants to such things as are against their conscience . Answ . Though the conscience be free to a man , and out of anothers power , yet their outward actions are not free : and though faith , pietie , righteousnesse , nor any grace can be forced into men , yet they may be forced to vse the meanes which God hath sanctified for the breeding and increasing of them . Though they cannot be forced to haue a religious and righteous heart , yet they may be forced to doe religious and righteous duties : or if a master cannot force these , yet he may and ought to doe his vttermost endeuour : by which means though he cannot free his seruant from death , yet he shall free his owne soule from the guilt of his death . §. 11. Of a masters wisdome in ordering things indifferent . Equitie hath respect to those things which are in a masters power to command or not command : such are all ciuill actions as concerne himselfe , concerning the particulars whereof God hath giuen no direct charge for an absolute performance of them : as to goe of such an errand , to doe such a message , to dispatch such a businesse . Concerning these things I may say of a masters power , as the Apostle doth of a parents power in another case ; If he seeth it meet to be done , and commandeth his seruant to doe it , he doth well , he sinneth not . If he seeth it not meet to be done , and commandeth it not , he doth also well , he sinneth not . Of this kinde of things speaketh the Centurian , where he saith , I say to one , goe , to another , come , to a third , doe this . The marke which masters must aime at in commanding or forbidding these , must be expediency : for all things that are lawfull , are not expedient . Expediency dependeth much vpon circumstances , and consequences which may follow vpon the doing of any thing : in obseruing whereof the wisdome of him who hath power to haue a thing done , or not done , especially appeareth . When Dauid suffered not Hushai his good friend , and wise counseller , to goe with him when he fled from Absolom , but bid him returne to the citie and there abide , he had an eie to the good consequence that might follow thereupon . And when Ioab commanded Cushi rather then Ahimaaz to carrie the newes of Absoloms death , he had an eie to the meetnesse of the persons , and to the kinde of message . To apply this to our purpose , Equity requireth that masters ( in commanding things indifferent , which they haue power to command or not to command ) haue an eie to their seruants ability , sex , age , disposition , conscience , and other like circumstances , that the thing which they command be somewhat agreeable to them , not aboue their ability , not vnbeseeming their sex , not vnfitting their age , not thwarting their disposition , not against their conscience . §. 12. Of masters offence against expediency . It is contrary to equity for a master to regard only himselfe , and his own mind , euen in things that are lawfull . Paul was not of this minde , when he said , He sought not his owne profit : no nor his owne will. Expediency and inexpediency were great motiues vnto him , to forbeare things which were otherwise lawfull : yet little is this regarded by many : for 1. Many command things to the very vttermost of their seruants strength , if not aboue it , ( as Pharaoh ) or else things dangerous , which may bring much mischiefe vpon them . Dauid was touched in heart for mouing only by a wish his seruants to fetch him water with the danger of their liues . 2. Others against comelinesse put men to doe maids workes , and maids to doe mens worke . 3. Others vpon meere partiality keepe vnder old and good seruants , and preferre much younger before them . 4. Others will forcibly make seruants doe things against their naturall disposition , as to handle , yea and eat such things as they cannot endure to touch or see . 5. Others in doubtfull matters will vrge and presse them against their conscience . Howsoeuer in these and other such like things not vnlawfull , seruants ought to doe what they can to satisfie their masters command , if he be peremptory in vrging them : yet ought not a master to be too peremptory in pressing his authoritie and power . §. 13. Of the power of masters to correct their seruants . The second point wherein a masters power consisteth is correction : which may be giuen by lookes , words , or deeds . By a mans looke his anger and wrath against another is manifested . * In Hebrew the same word signifieth a face , and wrath : because wrath soonest sheweth it selfe in a mans face . It is noted of Cain , that being very wrath his countenance fell downe , Gen. 4. 5. Now the manifestation of a masters wrath against his seruant is a correction . But words whether of rebuke , or threatning , doe much more declare the same . This phrase which Solomon vseth Pro. 29. 19. ( a seruant will not be corrected with words ) sheweth that there is a correction by words : and though it be negatiuely propounded , yet doth it not imply that correction by words is not to be vsed to a seruant , but rather , if thereby he be not moued , that blowes must be added thereto : which is a correction by deeds , whereof Christ maketh mention in the parable of those seruants that according to the greatnesse of their fault are to be beaten with many stripes . It is therefore in a masters power to correct his seruant with stripes , or blowes . Which being so , I will shew , 1. How farre his power herein extendeth . 2. How it is to be ordered . §. 14. Of the restraint of masters power : that it reacheth not to their seruants life . Concerning the extent of a masters power in correcting his seruant , this question is to be resolued , Whether a master haue power for any fault to take away his seruants life . Answ . His power reacheth not so farre , as is euident by these reasons . 1. There is no precept , nor approued example , nor any other warrant out of Gods word for it . The Iewes had great power ouer such seruants as were strangers : Of them they might buy bond-men and bond-maids : they might haue them for a possession : and take them for an inheritance for their children after them , to be bond-men for euer : they might be put to the most toyling , droyling , base , and abiect workes that they had , as drawing water , hewing wood , and the like ; but yet their masters had not power ouer their liues . 2. A master might not dismember his seruant : if vnawares he did smite out an eie or tooth of his seruant , he must make a recompence : which was to let him goe free . Much lesse therefore might he take away his seruants life . 3. If a seruant died vnder his masters hand when he corrected him , though he intended not wilfully to murder him , that master was to be punished . It was not therfore lawfull for a master wittingly to kill a seruant . 4. The power of life is proper to the publike magistrate , who doth all things in open publike places , that so there may be many witnesses of his iust proceeding . If masters had this power , many might priuily be put to death , and no man know for what cause , as it is in popish inquisitions . 5. * The approued lawes of men make it wilfull murder for a master to slay his seruant wittingly , though the seruants fault be neuer so hainous . Neither the authority of the master , nor desert of the seruant , shall exempt the master that slayeth his seruant from the guilt and punishment of felony . Obiect . In ancient times masters had this power . Answ . They neuer of right had it , though some might exercise it . Among Gods people it was neuer exercised in any age of the world . That liberty which was taken , was among the heathen : and yet among them as polities came to be more and more ciuilly gouerned , that vsurped liberty by the lawes of Magistrates was much restrained : and when Emperors and Kings became Christians , it was vtterly taken away . Obiect . If a man take an enemie by warre , he hath power to kill him . Answ . If in the time of the warre he slay him not , but then spare him , and take him as a captiue , and make him his seruant , though but a bondslaue , he hath not power of his life . §. 15. Of masters excesse in correcting seruants . Contrary to their iust and due power doe they , who in their rage stab their seruants , or otherwise make them away : yea they also who so vnmercifully and vnmeasurably beat them with rod , cudgell , or any other thing , as death follow thereupon : for many there be who hauing once begunne to strike , know not when to cease , but lay on as if they were striking stocks and blocks , and not their owne flesh . God foresaw that masters were prone to such cruelty , and therefore a set a stint number of stripes , which none that beat another might exceed . Among these may be reckoned such desperate masters as in their moode will strike their seruant with any thing that commeth next to hand , be it heauy , cragged , hard , or sharpe , they care not ( b As a mad man who casteth fire-brands , arrowes , and death . ) These things may endanger a seruants life , if not , they may breake his head , or otherwise wound , bruise , and lame him . It is beyond a masters power by any correction to impaire life , health , or strength of his seruant , or any way in his body to disable him from doing that which otherwise he might haue beene able to doe . If masters , no not for punishment of any sinne , may not take away or endanger the life of his seruant , what may we thinke of such masters , as without any fault of their seruants , cause them to be made away by putting them vpon some desperate attempt , either to maintaine their owne quarrell , or for some other vniust end ? c Dauid dealt thus with Uriah : but afterwards he d sorely repented this part of iniustice . At another e time when three of his seruants had fetched him water , which he longed for , with ieopardy of their liues , though in safety they returned , yet his heart smote him for his longing , and he would not drinke of that water because they had ventured their liues to fetch it . But what may we say of such masters , as cause their seruants for their sakes to commit felony , murther , treason , rebellion , and such other things , as cause the publike magistrate to vnsheath his sword against them , & cut them off ? We noted this * before to be a grienous fault in regard of the vnlawfulnesse of the thing : here further we may note it to be much more hainous in regard of the mischiefe that followeth thereupon , which is the losse of their seruants life : so as thus they make themselues accessary to a detestable sinne , and guilty of the bloud of their seruant . §. 16. Of masters ordering that correction they giue to their seruants . 2. That masters may well order that correction which they giue to their seruants , difference must be put betwixt the age , sex , disposition , and faults of those whom they correct . 1. Masters ought not to be so forward to strike such as are growne in yeares , as the younger sort . Yeares bring vnderstanding , and a rebuke will make one of vnderstanding more sory for a fault , and more carefull to amend it , The direction prescribed to parents ( Treat . 6. § . 47. ) for well ordering that correction which they giue to their children , may in many points be here fitly applied . Read it . then blowes : smart more workes vpon the younger sort . But if notwithstanding their yeares they be stout , and will not regard words , their stoutnesse . must be beaten downe with blowes . a Smite a scorner , saith the wise man : and againe , Iudgements are prepared for scorners , and stripes for the backe of fooles . Seeing seruants in yeares are in this case to be corrected , it is further requisite to put a difference betwixt the kinde or measure of correction which is giuen to them , and to the younger sort : if they be corrected as children , they may either make a toy of it , or the more disdaine at it . c Blewnesse , wound , and stripes piercing into the inward parts of the belly , are a purging medicine against euill , to stout seruants of ripe yeares . 2. If there be a master and mistresse ioynt gouernours ouer an house , it is fittest for the master to correct men-seruants , the mistresse maids . * Abraham put his maid ouer to Sarah in such a case . Yet if a maid should wax stout , and mannish , and turne against her mistresse , she being weake , sickly , with child , or otherwise vnable to master her maid , the master may and must beat downe her stoutnesse and rebellion : e so much did the law of God permit . 3. If seruants be of an ingenious disposition , willing and forward to doe that which belongeth vnto them , sorry when they haue committed a fault , and carefull to amend their faults , many things may be passed ouer in them , which must be corrected in others . To this may be applied the counsell of the wiseman , Take no heed to all the words that are spoken . 4. Correction must be measured according to the greatnesse of the fault punished , and the circumstances whereby the fault may iustly be aggrauated . The seruant that knew his masters will and did it not shall be beaten with many stripes : But he that knew not and did commit things worthy of stripes , shall be beaten with few stripes , Luk. 12. 47 , 48. Many aberrations are daily committed contrary to euery branch of this direction , in that masters and mistresses in exercising this part of their power are carried away with passion , and doe that which they doe in this kinde after their owne pleasure . Thus they turne a dutie into sinne , and by vndue correcting of their seruants prouoke God to correct them in his wrath , either here or in the world to come . §. 17. Of masters power ouer their seruants in and about their mariage . The third point to be noted concerning a masters power ouer his seruant , is about his seruants mariage . Sundry questions are moued about this point , which I will briefly resolue . 1. Quest . Haue masters power to order and dispose their seruants mariage as they please ? Answ . No , not without the free consent of the seruants themselues : for mariages must be made with the free consent of the parties that are maried . Obiect . The law implieth that a master hath power to giue his seruant a wife , for it sheweth whose those children shall be that are borne to that seruant , to whom a master hath giuen a wife . Answ . 1. That law is to be vnderstood of such seruants as being strangers were bond-slaues , ouer whom masters had a more absolute power then ouer others . 2. The masters power of giuing did not simply force the seruant to marie the party so giuen : but restrained the seruant from marying any other then whom the master should giue . 2. Quest . Is not a masters power in the matter of mariage as great ouer a seruant , as a parents ouer a childe ? Answ . No. See the reason Treat . 5. § . 20. 3. Quest . May a master denie his seruant liberty to marie ? Answ . Yea , for the time that the seruant hath couenanted to be a seruant with his master . For that time a seruant is part of his masters goods , and possessions . As bond seruants were a masters possession for euer : so couenanted seruants are his possession for the time of their couenant . When God gaue the deuill leaue to seize on all that Iob had , by vertue of that permission he seized on all kindes of Iobs seruants bond and free , as well as on his goods : which he could not haue done , if Iobs seruants had not beene as his goods . Yet notwithstanding if seruants shall make it knowne to their master , that necessity requireth they should marie , such respect ought to be had to the chastity euen of seruants , as in this case I may vse the phrase with the Apostle vseth in reference to children , Let them be maried . 4. Quest . What if seruants marie without consent of masters , is that mariage nullified thereby ? Answ . No. The mariage being otherwise rightly performed , remaineth a firme mariage : though the seruants in so doing haue sinned : for which their master may iustly punish them . 5. Quest . May a master keepe his seruants so maried without his consent from their bed-fellowes ? Answ . He may exact the whole time of his couenant for seruice : but that power which by the bond of mariage husbands and wiues haue ouer one anothers bodies , suffereth them not to be altogether separated one from another . Besides , our law freeth a maid-seruant when she is maried , from her masters couenant . §. 18. Of masters rigour in forcing mariages on seruants : or in separating man and wife . Contrary to a masters power doe they , who force their seruants to marie whom they like not : as when a master hath defloured his maid , to couer his shame he will make one of his seruants marie her . They also doe contrary to their power who seeke to separat their seruants that are maried from their bed-fellow : some will keepe the man at his house day and night from his wife , and so the wife from her husband : others will send one of them into remote parts of the land , where the other shall not know : yea others will be sure to keepe them one from another , for they will send one of them beyond sea for many yeares together , if not for euer . These practises are against the law of mariage , and too rigorous and vniust . §. 19. Of masters power to dispose their seruants persons . The fourth point to be noted of a masters power ouer his seruants respecteth their persons , which so properly belong to a master for the time of their seruice , as he may not only keepe them himselfe for his owne seruice , but also passe them ouer , and giue , or sell them to another . By Gods law not only strangers , but Iewes also might be sold for seruants . The customes and statutes of our land doe also permit masters to make ouer their seruants from one to one : and on their death-beds to bequeath them to whom they will , euen as their goods and possessions . That this power be not abused , in the executing thereof , masters must principally respect the good of their seruants : and for that end put them ouer to fit masters , such masters as may doe them good and not euill , all the time of their abode with them , and seruice vnder them . Contrary hereunto doe they , who aime meerely at their owne aduantage , not caring to whom they put ouer their seruants , so they may make gaine thereby . Some will sell them , namely , when they haue them beyond sea , to Turks and Infidels ; some to Papists , and other Idolaters ; some to profane persons ; some to cruell inhumane beasts ; some to men of vnlawfull trades ; some to men of no trades . Such masters as make their seruants ouer to such as these are , or like to these , shall answer for all the wrong is done to them . §. 20. Of masters well managing their authoritie . This Apostle in * another place giueth this charge to masters , Giue vnto your seruants that which is iust and equall . By doing these two things masters shall well manage their authoritie . Iustice respecteth the place , and seruice of seruants . Equitie respecteth their minde , and manner of doing seruice . All seruants , in that they are seruants , and doe their masters worke , must haue that which of right belongeth to seruants . This is Iustice . Such seruants as beare an especiall loue and liking to their masters , doing seruice not by constraint , or with eye-seruice , as men-pleasers , but in singlenesse of heart with good will , and all good faithfulnesse , seeking to the vttermost of their power , their masters good , must be accordingly respected and dealt withall . This is Equitie . As the Apostle compriseth Iustice vnder this phrase ( doe the same things ) for seruice giue due recompence : so more especially he compriseth Equitie vnder it : for seruants good will and more then vsuall respect of their masters , let masters returne good will , and more then ordinarie respect to seruants . S. Peter noteth these two vertues vnder two other words , good , gentle : A masters goodnesse hath relation to Iustice : his gentlenesse to Equitie . §. 21. Of masters endeuouring the saluation of their seruants . That Iustice which is required of masters respecteth the soule , bodie , and estate of their seruants . In respect of their soules good , masters must seeke the spirituall edification of their seruants . When Zacheus first beleeued , Christ said , Saluation is come to this house ( Luk. 19. 9. ) why to this house , rather then to this person , but because he knew that Zacheus would doe the dutie of a good master , and seeke the saluation of his houshold ? Herein must masters beare an impartiall respect to all in their house : as the holy Fathers , who though about temporall goods they put difference betwixt the place of children , and condition of seruants ; yet in seruing God , wherein eternall happinesse is looked for , they did with an equall respect prouide for all the members of their house . The proofes alleadged for seruants obedience to masters care in this point , doe shew that this dutie appertaineth to masters . See Treat . 7. § . 15. The respect which masters owe to God , themselues , their seruants , the Church , and Common-wealth where they liue , requireth as much . 1. God hath commanded as much ( Deut. 6. 7. ) as this charge implieth , Thou shalt talke of my Lawes when thou sittest in thine house : and God hath manifested his approbation thereof , by commending Abraham for commanding his children and household to keepe the way of the Lord , Gen. 18. 19. 2. Masters themselues reape great benefit by a faithfull discharge of this dutie : and that both by discharging a good conscience to God , ( who requireth this at their hands , in that he hath made them prophets and priests in their house , as well as kings ; and will require an account of them for all that are vnder their gouernment : ) and also by bringing their seruants to doe more faithfull seruice to them . For there is no such meanes to stirre vp seruants to doe all good dutie , as the feare of God planted in their hearts . That seruant that shall finde true grace either first wrought , or further increased in him by his mastersmeanes , will thinke him selfe so beholding to such a master , as he shall neuer be able to make any sufficient recompence , & therefore will endeuour to do what good seruice he can in way of thankfulnes : he will not only be faithfull & diligent in his businesse , but he will call vpon God to prosper his seruice for his masters good , and to recompence that kindnesse which his master hath done to him . 3. No earthly thing that a master can doe for his seruant ( be it portion of money , preferment to any place of profit or credit , or skill in a good trade and calling ) can be comparable to the edifying of a seruant in grace . 4. Seruants well instructed in pietie are likeliest to proue most profitable not only to the familie , but also to the Church and Common-wealth where they liue . That masters may the better edifie their seruants , 1. They must daily instruct them in the principles of religion , and all duties of pietie : admirable is the profit which will arise from a daily and constant vse of religious exercises : though but a little time be spent at once , yet will much knowledge be gained by a frequent vse of them . This dutie is so much the more necessarie , because publike Ministers cannot take such particular notice of euery seruant in their Parishes , as masters may in their families . 2. Masters must cause their seruants to goe to the publike ministerie of the word , and worship of God , to be further built vp thereby , and confirmed in their faith . Masters vnder the Law were commanded to let their seruants eat of the Passeouer , which was a solemne sacrament . The Law which enioyneth all males to appeare on the solemne feast dayes before the Lord , implieth that seruants also should goe . This dutie must especially be performed on the Lords day : for the charge giuen to masters in the fourth commandement for sanctifying that day , is extended to seruants in these words , Thou , nor thy man-seruant , nor thy maid-seruant . 3. Masters , beside instructing seruants at home , and causing them to goe to Church , must take an account of their profiting , both by the publike , and also by the priuate meanes of edification . Otherwise they shall not know how to order their manner of instructing them : when to giue them milke , & when strong meat . 4. To make the meanes more effectuall and profitable , they must to instruction adde prayer . Meanes , without Gods blessing vpon the meanes , are nothing . As they obserue any grace wrought in their seruants , they must be thankfull vnto God for the same , and pray for the increase of it . §. 22. Of masters neglecting to edifie their seruants . Contrary is the minde and practise of most masters : they thinke if they allow their seruants sufficient diet , lodging , and clothing , or wages according to their couenant , they haue done all that they need to doe : and answerably they doe no more : wherein they shew themselues no better then the heathen . For doe not the heathen so ? Obiect . At first taking of a seruant no more was couenanted . Answ . There are two couenants whereunto a master standeth bound : one with God ; the other with his seruant . Though his couenant with his seruant requireth no more then some temporall commodities , yet Gods couenant requireth spirituall edification . Many masters are so greedie of their seruants worke , as they are loth to afford any time , at morning or euening , for religious exercises : they thinke by their seruants labour to thriue , and thinke not of Gods blessing which maketh rich . Some goe so far therein , as they keepe their seruants from the publike worship of God , euen on the Lords day . Thus it commeth to passe , that seruants , who came ignorant and profane to a master , after long abode with him , so goe away as they came . Many that themselues make some conscience of fearing God , much faile herein : they regard not to teach their seruants the feare of God , whereby they depriue themselues of much blessing , and pull Gods curse vpon their persons and houses . §. 23. Of allowing seruants sufficient food . In regard that seruants haue not bodies of brasse , or steele , but of flesh and bloud as all others , masters that haue the benefit of their strength and abilitie of their bodies , must be carefull of nourishing , and cherishing them : and that both in health , and sicknesse . For preseruing seruants health , respect must be had to their Food , Clothing , Labour , Rest . A due prouision of food for seruants is commended in Solomons good house-wife , who giueth meat to her houshold . And in the direction which he giueth to housholders , in these words , Let the milke of thy goats be sufficient for thy food , and for the food of thy family . The food which masters prouide for their seruants must be for qualitie , good and wholesome ; for quantitie , sufficient to preserue health and increase strength ; for time , giuen in due season . It is noted that the hired seruants of the father of the prodigall childe had bread ( by bread according to the Scripture phrase is meant all kinde of needfull wholsome food : in which sense it must needs be there taken , because it is opposed to huskes , which are not very wholsome , fitter for swine then men ) yea they had bread enough . It is further noted of that good steward who was , as a master , ruler ouer the houshold , that he gaue the houshold their portion of meat in due season . Quest . May not seruants be stinted of their food ? Answ . In regard of superfluitie they may and ought to be stinted , but not in regard of sufficiencie . It is not meet that all seruants should haue as much as they can deuoure : for then many of them would doe but little worke : but most meet it is that euery one should haue as much as is needfull for strength , that so he may be the better able to doe and endure his worke : the Greeke word translated in the * place before quoted portion , implieth as much . There is a double bond to tie masters to performe this dutie : one in regard of themselues : the other in regard of their seruants . Masters themselues shall haue the profit and benefit of the health and strength of their seruants : for their owne sakes therefore it is requisite to afford them sufficient food . Men that desire to haue their worke well done by their beasts , or in their iourney to be well carried to the end thereof , will be carefull that their beasts shall be well fed . But beside this , considering the health and strength of seruants is spent in their masters businesse , iustice requireth that their health and strength should be repaired and preserued by them . §. 24. Of defect and excesse in allowing seruants food . There are two extremes contrary to this dutie . One of those that are too niggardly , and ( as we speake ) miserable in the allowance of food to their seruants : and that sometimes in the quantitie , when seruants bellies are too much pinched : euen so as their bodies are weakned for want of food . The Prodigall childe was thus serued : these are both vniust and iniurious masters : vniust to their seruants : iniurious to their seruants , and themselues too . Sometimes againe such miserable masters offend in the qualitie of that food which they giue to their seruants , as when it is kept too long , and growne musty , mouldy , or otherwise vnsauoury : or when the worst kinde of food , for cheapnesse sake , is bought , euen such as is scarce fit for mans meat : the more abundance that there is of such stuffe , the more loathsome it is . Lastly , though I thinke it not meet to binde masters vnto set houres for their seruants meales ( Christ affordeth a greater libertie vnto masters , in the parable of a masters vsage of his seruant after he came from his worke ) yet there may be a fault , as there is , in many masters , in keeping their seruants too long from meat , not suffering them to interrupt their worke for meat sake , but to tarry for their supper till ten a clocke at night , when they giue ouer worke : surely this cannot be good for the bodies health and strength . Another extreme doe such masters fall into , as bring vp their seruants too delicatly . Solomon hath expresly taxed such , and noteth that this mischiefe is like to follow thereupon , he shall haue him become his sonne at the length : such a seruant will forget his place , scorne to be as a seruant , but aspire to be as his masters childe , which is next to a masters mate . §. 25. Of masters care about their seruants apparell . A wise care for seruants cloathing is also commended in the example of Solomons good housewife , She is not afraid of the snow for her houshold , that is , for the coldest season in winter , for all her houshold are clothed with double garments : that is , with such clothing as is fit for cold weather . Fit and decent apparell is both a meanes of preseruing health , and also a matter of good report , tending to the credit of a master . Yet contrary is the humour of many : they care not how tagged and ragged their seruants apparell is : insomuch as many seruants haue neither comely nor warme apparell . The Hebrew word is oft vsed for scarlet . But according to the proper notation of it , it signifieth things doubled : which I take to be most pertinent to this place , and therefore I haue so translated it . The Kings translators haue noted as much in the margin . This point concerneth those masters especially that finde their seruants ( as we speake ) and prouide all things for them : as in old time masters did for most seruants , and as now they doe for prentises whether male or female . If seruants by couenant be at their owne finding for apparell , masters are not so strictly bound therein : yet they must haue a care that their seruants fall neither into the one extreme of too base , slouen-like , or sluttish apparell , nor into the other of too garish , or too costly apparell . Masters hauing authority ouer their seruants , must keepe them in order and good compasse , and haue respect to decencie in this as in other things . For apparell is one of those outward signes whereby the wisdome of masters and mistresses in well gouerning their seruants is manifested to the world . If therefore seruants be attired vnseemly for their place and abilitie , all that see them will thinke their masters and mistresses are of such a minde as the seruants are , or at least too remisse and carelesse of their gouernment . §. 26. Of moderating seruants labour . Though labour and paines be proper to a seruants place , yet he may be so put vnto it , as the health and strength of his body may be impaired thereby . For the well ordering of this therefore a dutie lieth vpon masters : and that in two things especially . 1. That they well moderate the labour whereunto they put their seruants , so as they may be able for the time to vndergoe it , and to endure so long as their time of labour is appointed . It was a good reason which Saul rendred to keepe Dauid from entring combat with Goliah , because ( as he thought ) Dauid was not able to fight against the Philistim , Dauid being a youth , and Goliah a man of warre . And indeed if Dauids faith had not exceeded the strength of his body , it had beene vnmeet to haue put Dauid to that taske . They which are put to things aboue their abilitie , are like to faile , and sinke vnder the burden of them . It is contrary hereunto to put seruants to such hard taskes as impaire their strength , endanger their lims , and venture their liues . Saul shall rise vp in iudgement against such : for he supposing that it was too hard a taske for Dauid to vndertake combat with Goliah , was loth to put him to it . Dauid exceedingly failed herein , when he gaue direction that Vriah should be set in the forefront of the hottest battell , and yet the Generall with his strength to retire from him . Many seruants being put to seruices aboue their strength , either lose their liues thereby , or ( as we speake ) are neuer their owne men againe . It is also a fault in this kinde , to put seruants to such toiling workes as are fitter for beasts then men : or to oppresse them with too much worke , as the Egyptians oppressed the Israelites . Let Gods hearing the cry of those seruants so oppressed , and reuenging their oppressors for it , make all masters take heed of the like crueltie . §. 27. Of affording seruants fit meanes for their worke . 2. The other thing required of masters for wel ordering their seruants worke is , that they afford their seruants things needfull , and behouefull for that worke whereunto they are put : which minde was commendable in Saul , who assaied if his armour might be fit for Dauid when he was to goe against Goliah . To reckon vp all the particulars were an infinite taske : euery seuerall trade and worke hath proper meanes of helpe appertaining to it : this generall direction may be sufficient to moue masters to applie it to the particular workes and seruices whereunto they put their seruants . Fit meanes are such an helpe , as that which with them may easily be done , without them can hardly , if possibly at all be done . It is contrary hereunto to deale with seruants as the Egyptians did with the Israelites , exacting worke at their hands , and not affording them meanes to doe it : whereby many times they exact impossibilities . Some will haue much worke done in the night time , and not afford candle light : so in other particulars . §. 28. Of affording seasonable rest to seruants . Intermission , ease , and rest from labour at seasonable times , is as needfull and requisite , as food and apparell . The reason which God rendreth of the fourth commandement sheweth that masters ought to afford rest to their seruants : it is this , that thy seruant may rest . Without intermission and rest the body cannot endure labour : it will wax weake , faint , and vtterly vnable to continue : but , as labour decaieth strength , so rest repaireth it . There are two especiall times of rest , which seruants may not be denied . 1. The rest of the night . 2. The rest of the Lords day . The first is ordinary for all liuing creatures : for it was one principall-reason why God caused the light of the Sunne to be withdrawen from the face of the earth , that the inhabitants thereof might rest from their labour . Vntill the euening man goeth forth vnto his labour and worke . Time of darknesse is more fit for rest then worke . Let not this be so taken as if no worke were to be done , after the light of the day is taken away : ( then would but little worke be done in the depth of winter , when the daies are short : and then would not God haue afforded artificiall lights ) but to shew that difference must be made betwixt the day and night : and that the night is afforded for that time wherein men are most to rest . The other time of rest ( being the Sabbath day ) is by diuine institution . It was sanctified vnto man in the time of Adams innocency , when he stood as a publike head and stocke of all mankinde . The very name Sabbath , ( which in Hebrew signifieth rest ) and the expresse prohibition of doing any worke on that day , doe shew that it is a day of rest : and that one end thereof was for seruants to rest therein , is euident by the reason thereof , that thy seruant may rest . So as there is a double bond to tie masters to afford rest to their seruants on the Lords day : 1. The bond of piety to God. 2. The bond of charity to seruants : for in that God did thinke it meet for seruants to rest one day in seuen , we ought to thinke that it is needfull and behouefull for them . §. 29. Of denying seasonable rest to seruants . Contrary to both the forenamed times of rest doe many masters offend : as first , they who make their seruants watch too long at night , and againe , rise too soone in the morning , not affording so much time of rest and sleepe as is needfull for refreshing their bodies , and repairing their strength : whereby it commeth to passe that ( beside the wrong done to their poore seruants ) their worke cannot be done so well . Obiect . It is said of the forenamed good houswife , that her candle is not put out by night . Answ . That is a tropicall speech : and some-what hyperbolicall . The word night is put for a part thereof . The phrase only implieth vigilancy , shewing that she is not , as many , in the euening betimes in bed , and in the morning late vp ; but late downe and early vp . This phrase ( she riseth while it is yet night ) vsed before , sheweth that that which I haue noted , is the true sense . If not putting out her candle by night , should imply a sitting vp all night long , how could it be said that she riseth vp ? Quest . What time may be thought sufficient to afford sleepe vnto seruants ? Answ . As the same quantity of food is not ouer-strictly to be proportioned to all alike , so nor the same continuance of sleepe . Yet by experience it hath beene obserued that for sound and healthy bodies , fiue houres is the least time that may be allowed , and seuen houres is time sufficient for any . §. 30. Of masters offence in keeping seruants from the rest of the Lords day . 2. Against the rest of the Lords day , doe too too many masters offend : as 1. By keeping seruants at their ordinary worke on that day . 2. By sending them vp and downe on that day on many errands , as to gather vp debts , or to doe such other seruices as they are loth to afford time for on other daies . 3. By making that the greatest day of paines and labour , namely to such as are in the kitchin , or haue any other businesse about feasts : for the Lords day is by many ordinarily made a day of feasting . 4 By keeping them vp too late on Saturday nights : euen till one of the clocke . Many that make some conscience of the Lords day vse to offend herein : for that their seruants might not worke on that day , they keepe them vp till the very moment that they thinke the Sabbath beginneth : but herein they commit a double fault : one in not allowing their seruants sufficient time of rest : another in making them vnfit through want of sleepe to doe the holy seruices of the Lords day . §. 31. Of allowing time of recreation to seruants . Concerning times of recreation , I may say as the Apostle doth in another case , I haue no commandement of the Lord , namely expresse commandement to presse vpon the conscience of masters any set time for recreation : yet questionlesse it is very meet that seruants should haue some times to refresh themselues this way : for recreation rightly vsed is a great meanes to put life , and adde spirit , to youth especially . With worke and businesse not only mens bodies , but their mindes also are occupied and imployed : herein the labour and trauell of men differeth from the labour of beasts : for refreshing therefore both of body and minde is good and moderate recreation needfull . But I referre this point to the wise consideration of masters themselues , who may better by their owne obseruation discerne what in this kinde is fittest , then we prescribe . §. 32. Of masters care ouer their seruants in sicknesse , and after death . Masters prouident care for the good of their seruants is not to be restrained to the time of their health , but to the time of their sicknesse also , if it please God to visit them while they are in seruice . Wherefore all things needfull are in this case to be prouided for them by their master . First spirituall comfort for their soule , that so they may the better beare their infirmity : then such things as may for the present giue them ease and refreshing , and also , if it please God to adde his blessing , worke a recouery . The care of the Centurion for his sicke seruant is in Scripture commended : he did as much for his seruant as he could haue done for his sonne : The King of Arams care also was in this kinde commendable : he did not forbeare to write to his enemie , and to make himselfe beholding to him , in the behalfe of his seruant that was leprous . If the seruant haue beene formerly a faithfull , diligent , and profitable seruant , recompence requireth as much . For it is a most vnkinde , and inhumane part to denie that seruant succour in sicknesse , who in health hath beene profitable to his master . But if a master be carefull of his sicke seruant , affording vnto him the best meanes he can for his ease , and recouery , and that seruant , through Gods blessing vpon the meanes , recouer , he will , if he haue any sparke of goodnesse in him , hold himselfe so obliged to his master , as he shall neuer be able to make sufficient recompence : and thereupon be moued to vse all the diligence he can for his masters good : so that a master may reapebenefit to himselfe by this kinde of kindnesse . But though the seruant that is sicke haue in former time beene vnprofitable , and there be little hope of future benefit by him , yet for charity sake , and in subiection to Gods disposing prouidence , whereby that seruant is fallen sicke in his masters house , must he in that case be well looked vnto . If the Samaritan did well in taking care of a meere stranger out of his house , because he saw him succourlesse , surely that master which neglecteth his seruant that is sicke in his house , doth very ill . 1. Quest . What if he be not a couenanted seruant for a set time , but a Iourney-man at will , or one that worketh by the day or weeke ? Answ . Though a master be not so much bound to such an one , yet if he fall sicke in his house , he may not in that case thrust him out of doores , vnlesse he know where he may be wel prouided for . 2. Quest . What if a master be poore , and not able to prouide that which is requisite for a sicke person ? Answ . If the sicke person haue friends and kindred that are better able , they must prouide for him : if not , the Church must helpe : but it is the masters duty , to make the sicke mans case knowne to his friends , or to the Church . If , after all good meanes are vsed for recouery , the seruant die , his master must see the last duty in some seemely manner , performed for him , which is Christian buriall . Herein lieth a maine difference betwixt the vsage of mens bodies which after death shall be raised againe , and beasts that vtterly perish . Iaakobs care of burying his mothers nurse is expresly mentioned , in way of commendation . §. 33. Of neglect of seruants in sicknesse : and when they are dead . Many masters much offend in the contrary to the forenamed duties . For 1. Some , when they obserue their seruants begin to be sicke , will put them out of their houses , and leaue them to shift for themselues , as that cruell Amalekite who left his sicke seruant abroad in the fields . But note the vengeance of God which followed thereupon : The leauing of that sicke seruant in that case was the occasion of the destruction of that master and all his company . By that meanes they were discouered to their enemies . 2. Others , when they cannot remoue their sicke seruants out of their house , will suffer them there to lie succourlesse , and to perish for want of things needfull . Many rich men that are able to prouide well enough for them , will send them to some out , backe roome , and take no more care for them . In this kinde many of them shew more kindnesse to a dogge , or other beast that is not well , then to a seruant . An inhumane part . 3. Others , that seeme not so inhumane , deale too hardly with their seruants in such a case : they will afford them things needfull , but all at the poore seruants cost : and if those seruants haue not present money , they will cut it off their wages if they recouer health to doe them seruice . Is this to vndoe the heauy burdens ? Or is it not to lay burden vpon burden ? 4. Others , that are at some charges for their seruants sicknesse , doe so mutter at their seruants , and fling out such discontented speeches ( namely , that they tooke them for their worke , and not to keepe them in their bed : to get some thing by them , not to be at such cost with them : or that they make themselues more sicke then needs : they may rise , if they will , ( with many other like discontented speeches ) that the poore sicke seruants are more grieued and troubled with their masters discontent , then with their sicknesse : and oft moued to striue aboue their strength to rise , euen when death is seasing vpon them , and so hasten the approach of death . 5. Many that may be carefull enough of the bodily estate of their seruants in sicknesse , haue no respect at all to the spirituall comfort of their soules , they neither giue them a word of comfort themselues , nor send for minister or any other to doe it : but let them in this respect lie , and die as beasts . Of all points of vnmercifulnesse this is the greatest : and most vnbeseeming Christians . 6. Others , if their seruants die , will scarce afford them a winding sheet , but say , let any one that will , burie them for their clothes . Notice is to be taken of these in humane cariages , that the detestation of them may make other masters more tender hearted towards their seruants . §. 34. Of masters prouiding for the future estate of seruants . Next to the Soule , and Body of seruants , masters must haue some care of their estate : and that not only to keepe them while they are in their seruice , but also to endeuour and prouide that they may liue of themselues , and doe good to others . When shall I prouide for mine owne house ? saith Iaakob to his master . Which expostulation sheweth that this is a masters dutie . Contrary is the mind of most masters : for in entertaining seruants they thinke of nothing but seruing their owne turne . Whence it commeth to passe that when masters die many seruants are put to very hard shifts . Some forced to beg , others moued to filch and steale . Thus caterpillars are nourished to annoy the common-wealth . That I may not be thought to lay the care of parents on masters , and to equall seruants with children , I will note out foure particulars which will shew what manner of care and prouidence it is that is here required of masters in regard of their seruants estate . One is , that masters accustome their seruants to paines . Another is , that they exercise them in some vsefull calling . A third is , that they giue them sufficient wages . A fouth is , that after sufficient seruice they suffer them to prouide for themselues . §. 35. Of well imploying seruants . That charge which the master gaue to his seruants when he was going abroad ( occupie till I come ) sheweth that masters must keepe their seruants exercised and imployed about some businesse or other : which is also implied vnder this part of a good mistresses commendation , she giueth a portion to her maidens , meaning a portion of worke . As there is neuer an idle member in a naturall body , but euery one is imploied , so should it be in a family . 1. Thus seruants being , while they are in subiection , inured to paines , they will be more industrious when they are of themselues : yea they will both more willingly vndergoe , and more easily goe thorow matters which require paines and diligence . Use maketh perfect . 2. Thus will masters themselues , and others afterward receiue the more profit , and greater benefit by them . 3. Thus will many temptations be auoided , and euils preuented : continuall imployment to the corrupt nature of man is as a running streame which carrieth away all the mud and filth in a brooke , so as none setleth there . It is contrary hereunto to harbour idle-packes in a mans house : to giue meat , and drinke , and lodging to such as doe no worke at all . The Apostle expresly commanded , That if any man would not worke , neither should he eat . These are not only a prey to the deuill , but also instruments of the deuill , by which he worketh much mischiefe : for these are they that are most ready to discouer the secrets of an house , to be tatling of euery thing that is done , to sort themselues with all companies , and not content to doe no good themselues , disturbe , interrupt , and draw away such as are busie at their worke . §. 36. Of exercising seruants to a calling . Though it be a good thing to keepe a seruant alwaies occupied and imploied , yet for the benefit of the seruant it is further requisite , that his imployment be about some setled matter , whereabout he may also exercise himselfe when he is out of seruice . This especially concerneth such as haue taken prentises . They must teach them their trade . 1. For that end are prentises bound to masters . 2. The couenants on the masters part require as much . 3. The good which thence is like to come to the master himselfe , his prentise , and others , will recompence the paines . Other seruants also must be tied to a worke which may be a meanes of maintenance : as in a great house , to offices about that house : in the country , to husbandry : in offices about the law , to some imployment therein ; and so in other callings . It is contrary hereunto for masters to enuy their prentises the mysterie of their trade : to imploy them from time to time about messages , and errands , and such things as tend only to the masters present need , but cannot be profitable for the seruants in time to come . These are like old , growne , broad trees , which keepe all the sunshine from the shrubs that grow vnder them , and so keepe them downe from growing . Obiect . Prentises will be as iuy to the trees about which they cling , soone ouer-topping them , and foking all the life out of them : they will hinder their masters trading , and get away all his custome , if they be too expert in his trade . Answ . 1. This is but a meere surmise . It implieth that such masters as feare that which is pretended , deale not so currently , and faithfully with their customers as they should ; or else how could they surmise that wise chapmen would leaue one of whom they haue had long and good experience , to goe to a new beginner ? 2. Daily experience sheweth that God by his prouidence so ordereth mens affaires , that masters who from time to time traine vp and send forth many prentises well exercised and skilfull in their trade , doe hold on , yea and increase in their owne dealings and gaine which they get thereby ; and yet withall their prentises also come well forward . Why should any masters so distrust Gods prouidence , as to be afraid to make their prentises skilfull in their trade ? 3. When masters by death or otherwise giue ouer trading , how shall trades be continued , if masters be so enuious , and distrustfull ? What if their masters had so dealt with them ? And what if all masters should so deale ? For what one doth in such a case , he must presuppose that all may doe . In this kinde also doe such mistresses offend as keepe their maids many yeares together to drudgery worke , and neuer teach them , nor afford them meanes or leisure to learne points of huswifery , things whereby they may get better maintenance for themselues . Such masters and mistresses vse their seruants as beasts , only for their owne turne , without any respect to the seruants good : whereby they peruert the maine end of that relation betwixt master and seruant , which is a mutuall and reciprocall good to passe from the one to the other . §. 37. Of appointing to euery seruant his particular function . For the better exercising of seruants vnto some calling , let these directions be noted . 1. That masters appoint to their seruants their proper and peculiar worke , that they may know what to doe , and wherein to exercise themselues . And if there be many seruants in one house , to set vnto euery one their distinct function . The phrase before noted of the good mistresse ( she giueth a portion to her maidens ) proueth thus much . This was one thing which the Queene of Sheba obserued and admired in Solomons house , the standing of his seruants , namely , euery one in his owne place , at his owne taske . To this purpose it is noted , that the great master gaue to each of his seruants their distinct talents . It is thus in the bodie naturall : euery member is not only imployed , but also imployed in his owne function : the eye in seeing , the eare in hearing , the foot in standing or going , and so the rest . It is thus also in Christs mysticall bodie : one hath the spirit of wisdome , another of knowledge , another of faith , and so in other gifts . Thus also ought it to be in a familie where are many seruants . This is an especiall meanes to make euery one the more diligent and faithfull . For when euery one hath his particular worke , they know , that they in particular are to giue an account thereof : so as if it be not done , or ill done , they shall beare all the blame : if done , and well done , they shall haue all the praise . 2. Thus shall euery one be made skilfull and expert in some thing , by continuall attending vpon it , and exercising themselues therein . §. 38. Of disorder in families through masters negligence . The great disorder which is in many families is contrary hereunto : for there are many masters that hauing sundry seruants doe looke that all things should be well done , and yet appoint no particular place or worke to any one ; but thinke and say , that euery one should be forward to doe euery thing ; and when they finde not things done to their minde , they fret and fume , and complaine that they keepe so many seruants , and yet nothing well done . Such seruants are not free from all blame : but surely the masters haue greatest cause to complaine of themselues , and of their owne disorder in gouerning . For their negligence in appointing no set worke to their seruants , is the cause that all is neglected . For where many things to be done are left to many seruants , one will put off this , and another that , and say it belongeth not to them . Thus is it verified , that what is spoken to all is spoken to none : and that generall charges , are no charges . §. 39. Of masters ouerseeing the wayes of their seruants . The second direction is , that masters vse inspection ouer their seruants , and haue an eye vpon their seruants , to see how they spend their time , and dispatch the businesse committed to them . The good mistresse looketh well to the wayes of her houshold . This is noted of Booz , that he went to his field to see what his reapers did . The eye of a master is a great motiue to make a seruant diligent and faithfull : for thus he knoweth that both his diligence , and also his negligence shall be seene , and accordingly dealt withall . Hence arose that prouerbe , The eye of the master maketh the horse fat . The conceit which the euill seruant had that his master delayed his comming , and so could not see what he did , made him so vnfaithfull as he was . If a masters place will beare it , it is behouefull that he be present with his seruants , and as a good president goe before them . It is recorded of the good mistresse , that shee riseth and giueth a portion to her maids : shee is with them her selfe ; shee worketh willingly with her hands . This note of difference is put betwixt a prouident thriuing master , and a dissolute carelesse master : This man saith to his seruants , goe yee : but that man saith , goe we ; or thus , goe sirs , and ga'w sirs . It is contrary hereunto to let all goe ( as we speake ) at six and seuens ; and neuer to see what seruants doe . How can such expect that their seruants should be diligent in doing that which tendeth to their masters good , when they themselues are negligent in ouerseeing that which tendeth to their owne good ? Such masters as giue themselues to gaming , and following their pastimes all day long , doe much offend herein . So also such mistresses as spend all the morning in lying a bed and dressing themselues ( a custome cleane contrary to that which is noted of the good mistresse ) and at noone when they come out of their chamber , chide and brawle , because things are not more forward . §. 40. Of prouoking seruants to their dutie both by faire and foule meanes . The third direction is , that masters vse what meanes they can to prouoke and stirre vp their seruants to be diligent and faithfull : as in the first place , exhortation , admonition , perswasion , promises of reward , with other like faire meanes . Such were the meanes which Saul vsed to make his seruants faithfull vnto him , when he said , Will the sonne of Iesse giue euery one of you fields , and vineyards , &c. had the thing which he expected from them beene good , this manner of dealing with them had beene commendable . But if faire meanes preuaile not , then they may and ought to * rebuke , threaten , and correct their seruants . And if seruants be impudent in sinning , and neither faire nor foule meanes will reclaime them , they must then be thrust out of doores . Note what the master in the parable said to his seruant , Thou maist be no longer steward : to which purpose Dauid also said , He that worketh deceit shall not dwell within mine house : he that telleth lies shall not tarry in my sight . When Ismael grew a scoffer at Gods word , Abraham thrust him and his mother out of doores , and that by Gods appointment . The parable of cutting downe the fruitlesse figtree may fitly be applied to this point : and the reason also there rendred ( why combereth it the ground ? ) Why should incorrigible seruants take vp the roome of good seruants ? yea why should they remaine to insect and peruert other seruants ? Obiect . This is so farre from helping seruants in their estate , as it may proue their vtter vndoing . Answ . 1. They haue then none iustly to blame but themselues , Iustice ( in case of necessitie ) must haue her course , though through the iniquitie of man some mischiefe follow thereupon . 2. The execution of this on some , may make others better looke to themselues . 3. It may make them that are thrust out to be the more dutifull vnder another master , or more diligent in another course of life . Contrary is their course who obserue no course , or order in drawing on their seruants to doe their dutie , but begin with that which should be last : nay only vse that remedy which should not be vsed , vnlesse no remedy will serue the turne , which is to turne their seruants out of doores for euery small occasion . No instruction , perswasion , admonition , rebuke , threatning is vsed by many when their seruants haue offended , but this thunderbolt cast at them , be gone , get you out of doores . If this were taken notice of as a fault , longer might seruants tarry in an house then ordinarily they doe : and more good might master and seruant reape one from another : yea and the secrets of an house be better kept ; for the oft chopping and changing of seruants is it that maketh all things done priuatly in houses to be blazed vp and downe . §. 41. Of paying seruants their wages . A third thing required of masters in respect of the estate of their seruants , is to giue them their iust wages : euen this is included vnder that generall precept , a render to all their dues : and more particularly expressed in the example of b that master who hired labourers into his vineyard and at the end of their worke gaue them euery one their wages : yea there is an expresse c law to this purpose . Obiect . These places concerne labourers hired by the day . Answ . Seruants are in the same ranke : and the ground for both is the same : for both worke for wages . Yea the argument will more strongly follow from the lesse to the greater thus , If a labourer and seruant for a day must haue his wages iustly paid , much rather a seruant , and labourer for a yeere and yeeres . 1. A masters couenant requireth as much : if there were no other bond , yet that bond whereby he voluntarily bindeth himselfe , tyeth him in conscienc thereto . Among the fruits of the Spirit d S. Paul reckoneth Faith , meaning thereby fidelitie in keeping promise and couenant . 2. Common equitie and iustice requireth as much : for wages is as due for labour , as money for wares . Christ taketh it for an vndeniable principle , that e the labourer is worthy of his hire : so also doth f the Apostle . This dutie is to be performed to such as are hired for wages : of them that are found all things by their master , I spake * before . In giuing seruants their wages these three things are to be obserued . 1. That there be a sufficient competency of wages allowed : euen so much at least as may serue to prouide such necessaries as are fit for a seruant : for there is great reason , that he that worketh should liue of his worke . 2. That it be giuen in due season . g God would not haue the labourers hire be vnpaid one night after it was due . The time couenanted by a seruant for his wages , is the seasonable time : then he expecteth it : to that time he putteth his occasions of vsing it : at that time therefore it ought to be giuen him . 3. That it be paid to the full , according to the couenant : the masters promise , and the seruants need require as much . §. 42. Of masters iniustice about their seruants wages . Iniustice contrary to the forenamed dutie of due paying their seruants wages is many waies committed . 1. When masters doe altogether detaine their seruants wages : h this is a crying sinne , which entreth into the eares of God. 2. When they make their seruants aske for their wages againe and againe , euen till they be ashamed : yea to stay and wait for it till they be forced to sigh vnto God : or else to filch and steale to supply their necessities : though these masters haue not a purpose vtterly to defraud their seruants of their due , yet the putting them off , and delaying to pay it , putteth seruants , that for the most part haue but from hand to mouth , vnto great straits : which the Lord well knew : and therefore i expresly forbad the detaining of a seruants hire one night . This therefore is a point not only of vnkindnesse , but also of iniustice . 3. When masters alter and change the couenanted wages , and seeke to diminish it , as k hard-hearted Laban did : they shew thereby that they repine at their seruants welfare , and seeke only themselues . §. 43. Of suffering seruants to prouide for themselues . A fourth thing required of masters in regard of their seruants estate is , that after sufficient seruice done they suffer their seruants to prouide for themselues . This Iaakob required of Laban as a most equall and reasonable matter , saying , l when shall I prouide for mine owne house also ? ( as was * before noted in the generall . ) This hath respect especially vnto such seruants as haue beene a long time with masters as apprentises , and spent their time , labour , and paines only and wholly for their masters good . m Gods law tooke expresse order for such , that after certaine yeeres seruice they should goe free . So doe also the lawes of our land , especially the orders of London . Herein lyeth a maine difference betwixt seruants ( who are vnder subiection , and held to worke for their owne good ) and beasts ( which are only for mans seruice , and good . ) They therefore who are of a contrary minde , keeping seruants as long as possibly they can , euen all their life long vnto hard labour , and vnder seruitude , deserue to be serued with beasts rather then men and women . This kinde of masters rigour to their seruants is in particular noted to be n one of the causes of that great indignation of God against the Iewes , whereby he was prouoked to giue them ouer , as captiues to their enemies . §. 44. Of kindnesse to be shewed to good seruants . As masters must giue that which is iust to all seruants , so that which is * equall to them that deserue it : that is , they must be of an answerable minde and disposition to good , honest , louing , kinde , faithfull seruants , who stand not so much vpon that which is exacted , as vpon that which they are able to doe for their masters , and in that respect , as they see occasion doe oft times much more then is exacted , or expected . Goodnesse requireth goodnesse ; good will , good will ; and this is to doe the same things . This kinde of Equitie consisteth in these and such like particulars . 1. Masters must well esteeme of such good seruants : and haue them in high account . b Abram accounted his old good faithfull seruant as his childe , and till he had a childe thought of making him his heire . Great was that esteeme which Potiphar had of Ioseph , when of a bondslaue he made him ouerseer ouer his house , Gen. 39. 4. Why is the title Father giuen to masters , ( 2. King. 5. 13. ) and the title Sonnes to seruants , ( Ios . 7. 19. & 1 Sam. 24. 16. ) but to shew that seruants should beare a child-like affection to their masters , and that masters should beare a fatherlike affection to such seruants ? 2. Masters must take notice of the goodnesse , and kindnesse of such seruants : and manifest as much , both by giuing them due praise , and a good reward : both which are noted in the patterne of that great master who said , well done thou good and faithfull seruant , thou hast beene faithfull ouer a few things , I will make thee ruler ouer many things . Thus will those good seruants be the more encouraged to hold on , and others will be moued to imitate them . This incouragement doth the Apostle giue to all vnder authoritie , doe that which is good , and thou shalt haue praise of the same . Which phrase implieth that gouernours ought to praise those that doe well . 3. If such seruants be accused of any hainous crime , masters must not rashly giue credit thereto , but rather thorowly sift , and examine the matter . Herein Potiphar exceedingly failed , and by that meanes lost such a seruant as he could neuer get againe . If a good seruant doe by occasion slip , and commit a fault , his master ought in wisdome either to take no notice of it : or with some milde admonition passe it ouer : and not deale with him as with a lewd , gracelesse seruant . 4. When such seruants ( their couenanted time being expired ) depart , their masters must not let them goe away empty : but helpe them in their mariage ( as Moses his master did ) or in their setting vp , as the great master , who made his wise and faithfull seruant ruler ouer all his goods . §. 45. Of vnkinde dealing with good seruants . Vnworthy they are of good and kinde seruants who are of a contrary minde : as many masters are For 1. Some make no difference betwixt seruants : but esteeme of bad and good all alike : they thinke that the best seruants doe but their duty , therefore no extraordinary respect is to be borne towards them . But it is a point of wisdome sometimes to account a duty as a kindnesse : especially when good will of heart is ioyned with outward performance of duty . 2. Others thinke it policy to take no notice of any seruants extraordinary faithfulnesse and diligence to praise and reward the same , lest it puffe them vp too much . But there is much more feare of seruants fainting , and waxing weary of doing good if they haue no incouragement , then of growing insolent by incouragement . 3. Others will be more ready to checke and rebuke such for euery slip , and for failing in any thing , then others : because others lesse regard their rebuke : whereby they shew want of wisdome in well managing their authority . 4. Others when their seruants are about to goe away , or to marry , or to set vp , will seeke some occasion or other to fall out with them , of purpose to send them away empty . Many will carry a faire face toward profitable seruants till the time of recompence commeth , and then beginne to frowne , as Laban did . Yea so farre are some masters from seeking the prosperity of faithfull , wise , diligent , skilfull seruants , as they will hinder them in what they can , and keepe them downe : fearing lest as their seruants rise , they themselues should decay and fall . These are both vnkinde , and vngratefull masters . Would masters be so dealt with by their superiours ? Thou oughtest so to liue with thy inferiour , as thou wouldest haue thy superiour liue with thee . Hitherto of masters duties . The reasons to moue them to performe their duties follow . §. 46. Of the subiection vnder which masters are . Ephes . 6. 9. Knowing that your master also is in heauen : neither is there respect of persons with him . There is in generall but one reason alledged by the Apostle , to prouoke masters to doe their duties , but it is so laid downe as it compriseth other forcible reasons vnder it . The principall reason is taken from the subiection wherein masters are . The other reasons are taken from the description of that authority vnder which masters are : for it is such an authority , as , 1. In relation to it there is no difference betwixt master and seruant . 2. It is farre surpassing all dignities on earth . 3. It is moued with no outward respect of any thing . The first reason which declareth the subiection of masters , in that they haue a master ouer them , putteth them in minde of that account which they are to make , and reckoning which they are to giue of the well vsing of their authority , and of their cariage towards such as are vnder them . For they are but as stewards ouer fellow seruants : euery one of them therefore shall heare this charge , giue an account of thy stewardship . In this respect this reason is both as a spur , and as a curbe vnto masters . As a spur , to pricke them on forward conscionably to performe all those duties which are required of them : for they haue a master that will take notice thereof , and reward them for it . As they approue , and recompence the good seruice which their seruants doe : so much more will their master approue and recompence them if they doe well . Doe masters therefore looke that their seruants should performe their duty ? let them then performe theirs : for there is the same reason of both . Let this be applied to all the particular duties before mentioned . It is also as a curbe , to restraine masters from doing any thing to their seruants but what they can be able to iustifie vnto their owne master . With this curbe did God hold in the Israelites , saying , b Thou shalt not rule ouer thy seruant with rigor , but shalt feare thy God. Ioseph was held in with it , when he said , c This doe and liue , for I feare God. And Nehemiah , when he said , d The former Gouernours were chargeable to the people , but so did not I because of the feare of God. And Iob , when he said , e If I did despise the cause of my seruant , when God visiteth , what shall I answer him ? Thinke of this ô masters , when you are about to exact any thing of your seruants that is not lawfull or meet , when you are incensed and in passion stirred vp to strike your seruants vniustly or cruelly , when you detaine from them any thing that is their due , when you lay more on them then they are able to beare , when any way you wrong or oppresse them : thinke and say with your selues , can this be iustified ? how shall we be able to hold vp our head to our master when he calleth vs to account ? What stronger motiue to doe all dutie ? what stronger restraint from all iniustice and rigour ? The conceit which many haue that they are free , vnder none , to giue no account , maketh them both negligent of their owne dutie , and insolent ouer others ; as Pharaoh , who said , g Who is the Lord that I should obey him ? and Sennacherib , who said , h Shall your God deliuer you out of mine hands ? and Nebuchadnezzar , who said , i Who is that God that shall deliuer you out of mine hands ? Note the issue of this insolency . Pharaoh after many extraordinarie plagues laid on him and his people , k was drowned in the red sea with all his host . l Sennacherib after his host was destroied , was slaine by his owne sonnes . m Nebuchadnezzar became a very bruit . But to let these abominable blasphemers passe , there be many masters who , though they vtter not with their mouthes such execrable blasphemies , yet by their carriage towards their seruants shew themselues to be little better minded , in that they make their owne will a rule to their seruants , and will haue them doe such things as are vnmeet and vnlawfull , vsing their seruants as slaues , or rather as beasts . Let all such masters know that they haue a master . §. 47. Of the equality betwixt masters and seruants in relation to God. The second reason in this particle also ( your master also ) declareth an equality betwixt masters and seruants in relation to God. As God is the masters of seruants , so he is the master of masters also . As seruants are the Lords a freemen , so masters are the Lords seruants . In this respect they who are made rulers , and they who are vnder them , are called b fellow seruants . For howsoeuer in outward dignity there is great difference betwixt master and seruant , yet as the seruants of God they are of a like condition , and in many things may be accounted equall : especially if both be of the same faith , and so brethren in Christ . This is another spur and curbe too . A spur in that God will the more kindly accept that goodnesse which masters doe to their seruants , because it is done to Gods seruants . A curbe , in that seruants shall be heard before God as well as masters , for he is the master of both . Many thinke that all the kindnesse which is shewed to seruants is lost , because they are so meane as they are able to make no recompence . But their master is able . Others thinke , their seruants can neuer take any reuenge of them , and thereupon vse them as they list . But the master of seruants , who is also the master of masters , can take vengeance , euen such as shall make masters sorely repent all the wrong they haue done . If masters did duely weigh this point , that , howsoeuer in regard of outward gouernment there be some difference betwixt them and their seruants , yet before God they are as fellow seruants , would they be ouer-rigorous and cruell ? would they not be kinde and gentle ? §. 48. Of Gods being in heauen , how it is a motiue to prouoke masters well to respect their seruants . The third reason ( taken from the place of God , in heauen ) declareth the surpassing excellencie of that great master , who is the common master of masters and of seruants : and it addeth an edge to the former motiues . 1. It sheweth that though the wrong which masters doe to their seruants be within the walls of their house , so as no mortall eye can see it , yet God who is in heauen seeth it : and though seruants cannot be admitted into the courts of men to make their complaint , yet heauen is open to them ; to that great master that is in heauen they may haue accesse when they will. That which made the euill steward deale hardly with his fellowes , was the conceit which he had of his masters absence . But no such conceit can they haue of this great master , who know that he is in heauen , and that as heauen is ouer euery place , so the eyes of the Lord are in euery place , and behold the euill and good : he seeth all the good , and all the euill that masters doe to their seruants . 2. It sheweth that the kindnesse which the Lord will repay , and the vengeance which he will inflict , is infinitely greater then the good or euill that masters can doe to their seruants , euen as heauen i , higher then earth , and as he that is in heauen is greater then they that are on earth . Doest thou therefore , who art a master on earth , reioyce , or grieue the soule of thy seruant ? God in heauen can much more make glad or sad thy soule . Doest thou therefore desire the fauour , or feare the frownes of thy master in heauen ? shew fauour to thy seruant on earth , and forbeare threatning . Remember the infinite disparitie betwixt thy mastership and Gods , and this will the more moue thee to deale with thy seruant , as thou wouldest haue God deale with thee . 3. It sheweth that there is much more reason we should take notice of our seruants , of their paines , of their diligence , and of their faithfulnesse , then that God should take notice of ours : and lesse reason that we should scorne , or neglect our seruants , then God scorne or neglect vs. For there is far greater difference betwixt God and vs , then betwixt vs and our seruants . We and our seruants are all of the earth , of the same mould , nature , and disposition , subiect to the same passion , and to the same dissolution . ( The heathen obserued as much . ) But God is in heauen , eternall , vnchangeable , euery way surpassing glorious . How can we then looke to be respected of this master , if we respect not our seruants ? O masters , in all your dealings with your seruants , remember your master is in heauen . §. 49. Of Gods impartiall respect of all . The fourth reason ( in these words , neither is there respect of persons with him ) declareth Gods iust and equall manner of proceeding with all men , of what ranke and degree soeuer . God will doe the same things to all sorts of masters that they doe to their seruants . To the consideration of this impartiall iustice of God doth the Apostle call masters , both because of that outward power which they haue ouer their seruants , and also because for the most part masters are backt with the power and authority of magistrates on earth , who in matters of difference betwixt master and seruant are ordinarily partiall , respecting masters more then seruants . But let masters here learne to cast off all such fond conceits , and foolish hopes . Though they be higher in place , haue more wealth , and better friends then their seruants , and though men who haue carnall eies may thereby be much moued to respect them , yet will not God goe an haires bredth from iustice for the whole world . If the greatest man that euer was in the world should haue a seruant that were the meanest that euer was , and a case betwixt that master and that seruant should come before God , God would not any whit at all leane to that master more then to the seruant . If the greatest that be abuse the meanest , they shall not escape . Wherfore , O masters , giue no iust cause of complaint to any seruant . The Apostles manner of setting downe these points , noted in this word ( knowing ) implieth that ignorance of God , of that authority which he hath ouer masters , of that equality which in relation to God is betwixt masters and seruants , and of Gods heauenly excellency , and impartiall respect towards all , maketh masters to abuse their power , by neglecting all dutie , and insulting & tyrannizing ouer their seruants : wherefore you that haue heretofore beene ignorant of these points , now take knowledge of them ; and you that know them , oft call them to minde : and doe that which becommeth good masters , Knowing that your master also is in heauen , neither is there respect of persons with him . FINIS . Some faults escaped thus to be corrected . PAge 215. line 25. such a dissolution . pag. 218. lin . 28. haue no direct . ibid. in ma●g . l. 8. viro. pag. 268. l. 25. the fift com . pag. 297. l. 6. A fift reason . p. 412. l. 2. and also . p. 606. l. 9 point of iniustice . p. 629. l. 18. of one equall . Notes, typically marginal, from the original text Notes for div A68107-e230 * Since Midsommer . 1608. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Arist . Eth. lib. 8. cap. 12. M 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Ammon . Multum loqui est rem superfluis agere verbis . Aug. Epist . 121. ad Prob. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Arist . Rhet. lib. 3. cap. 2. a Paraphernalia . Treat . 3. §. 21. b Ibid. c Treat . 3. §. 22. d Treat . 3. §. 19. e Treat . 3. §. 18. f Treat . 4. §. 18. g Ephes . 5. 33. See Treat . 1. §. 95. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Athen. Mat. 11. 30. Methodusintelligentiae parens est , & magistra memoriae . Ordo memoriae maximè , lumen affert . Cic. 2. de Orat. Church-court in Black-Fryers London . 2. Febr. 1621. Notes for div A68107-e15070 a Num. 12. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , submitting . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , submit . Note . Doct. b Matt. 22. 38 , 39. c Heb. 13. 15 , 16. d Psal . 16. 2. e Iob 22. 3. & 35. 7. f Iob 35. 8. g Psal . 16. 3. 1. Vse . A note of hypocrisie . Iam. 1. 26. Isa . 58. 3 &c. Mic. 6. 6. &c. Matt. 23. 14. 1 Ioh. 4. 20. 2. Vse . Put not off one dutie with another . Matt. 23. 23. Matth. 19. 6. 2. Doct. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Gal. 5. 13. 1 Cor. 10. 24. Quest . Rom. 12. 10. How superiours ought to subiect themselues . Answ . Difference betwixt subiection of Reuerence and Seruice . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Rom. 13. 4. Difference betwixt the worke and manner of doing it . Phil. 2. 3. Euery one vnder some authoritie . Matth. 8. 9. Rom. 13. 1. Heb. 13. 17. Difference betwixt Magistrates and Ministers authoritie . Reason . Euery ones Office for the good of another . 1 Cor. 10. 24. 1. Vse . Exhòrtation vnto all to doe seruice . Est . 10. 3. 1 Cor. 9. 19. & 10. 33. Prou. 4. 3 , 4. Gen. 16. 6. Luke 7. 2. Rom. 12. 16. Gal. 5. 13. 2. Vse . Dehortation from swelling one against another . Gal. 3. 28. 1 Cor. 12. 27. Ephes . 4. 2. 1. What the feare of God is . The causes of it . Two effects of a filiall feare of God. Deum timere est nulla mala facere , & nulla bona quae faci enda sunt praete rire . Bernar. de modo benè viuen . ser . 4. 2 Chro. 19. 6 , 7. Prou. 8. 13. Job . 1. 1. Difference betwixt filiall and seruile feare . Bernard . loc . citat . Rom. 8. 15. * Est timor ne amittatur gratia beneficij . Hic timor cast us est , non eum charitas eijcit , sed asciscit . August . epist . 120. Qui gehennas metuit , non peccare metuit sed ardere . Aug. epist . 144. Jam. 2. 19. Luke 1. 74. 2. How God is the proper obiect of feare . Gen. 31. 42 , 53. Quest. Ans. How men are to be feared . Rom. 13. 7. Matth. 10. 28. 3. Euery dutie to be seasoned with a feare of God. Psal . 2. 11. 2 Cor. 7. 1. Phil. 2. 12. Acts 9. 31. a a Gen. 22. 12. b b & 42. 18. c c Iob 1. 1. Deut. 6. 13. Matth. 4. 10. Isa . 29. 13. Matth. 15. 9. Psal . 34. 11. 4. Why a feare of God is so much vrged . Deut. 11. 13. Deut. 30. 16. Gal. 5. 13. 1 Cor. 16. 14. Matth. 22. 38. Rom. 13. 10. Doct. d 2. Sam. 23. 3. e Gen. 42. 18. f Isa . 11. 2 , 3. 2 Chron. 19. 7. 1 Pet. 2. 17. Obiect . Answ . Difference betwixt doing a thing for feare of God and feare of man. Reason . The power of a feare of God. Vse . The necessitie of a feare of God. Gen. 20. 11. Rom. 3. 11 , &c. Doct. 2 Sam. 23. 3. 2 Chro. 19 9. Neh. 5. 15. 1 Pet. 2. 17. Coloss . 3. 22. 1 Pet. 2. 13. Eph. 5. 22. & 6. 1 , 6. 1. Reason . God the highest Lord. 2. Reason . God the Iudge of all . 1. Vse . The folly of all those who feare man more than God. Gen. 3. 6. Exod. 32. 1. 1 Sam. 15. 21. 2 Chro. 24 7. Marke 15. 15. Euscb . hist . Eccl. lib 2. cap. 7. Luke 12. 4 , 5. 2 King. 1. 9 , &c. Ier. 44. 19. Numb . 16. 32. a Numb . 11. 29. b 1 Sam. 24. 8. & 26. 9. c Gen. 39. 10. 1 Sam. 22. 17. d Act. 4. 19. Doct. a Eph. 4. 1. b Col. 3. 18 , &c. 1 Cor. 7. 1 Tim. 3. c 1 Pet. 2. & 3. d Tit. 2. See more of this point in The whole armour of God , Treat . 2. part 1. §. 4. e Tit. 2. 10. 1 Pet. 3. 1 , 2. Use . 2 Doctr. Priuate duties of the familie well beseeme any Christian . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Arist . Polit. lib. 1 Reason . The familie a seminarie . 2 Reason . A familie is a representation of Church and common-wealth . f 1. Tim. 3. 5. 1 Vse . Priuat callings in a familie sufficient callings . 2 Vse . Reproofe of such as hauing no publike office , thinke themselues freed from all dutie . Gods blessing on men diligent in their calling . g Gen. 31. 42. h Gen. 39. 2. i Exo. 3. 1 , 2. k 1 Sam. 16. 11 l 1 King. 19. 19. m Luk. 2. 8. n Psal . 91. 11. n 3. Vse . Publike callings may not hinder priuate duties . o Ios . 24. 15. p 1 Sam. 2. 29. & 3. 13. q 1 King. 1. 6. Why duties of man and wife first deliuered . 1. Man and wife were the first couple . 2. Man and wife are commonly the chiefest in a familie . Bis peccat qui exemplo peccat . Vse . Wiues particular duties first laid downe , because they are inferiours . a Eph. 6. 1. b Ephes . 6. 5. c Col. 3. 18 , 20 , 22. d 1 Pet. 3. 1. e Exod. 20. 12. Inferiours duties first taught , because they are most backward and loth to performe them . Greater difficultie in ruling well , than in obeying . Ducem velim qui à fronte pariter , & tergo sit oculatus . Timoth. apud Plutarch . 2 Sam. 24. 2 , &c. See Treat . 7. §. 37. 1 Sam. 14. 24. &c. Seniores & inter eos optimos , & prudentes & potentes oportet imperare . Iuniores vero parere . Plat. de rep . lib 3. f Eccl. 10. 16. g Isa . 3. 4. h Isa . 3. 12. Ambition is it which maketh inferiours loth to be subiect . 2. Inferiours duties first deliuered , to teach them how to winne their gouernours fauour . i Psal . 38. 20. 3. By obeying , men learne to rule well . Parendo disces imperare . Arist . Polit. lib. 3. c. 3. Use . Reasons why gouernours ought first to performe their duties . Vterque suum praeoccupet officium . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. Reasons why inferiours ought first to performe their duties . k Rom. 8. 7. Gen. 3. 16. l See Treat . 3. §. 4. Exod. 23. 2. Si propter Deum viro parueris , noli proponere quae ab eo fieri deceant , sed ea quibus te legislator secit obnoxiam diligenter exequere . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1. Cor. 11. m Gen. 3. 16. n 1 Cor. 11. 9. o Prou. 31. 29. p 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . q Subditae sint . Hieron . Vet. Trans . Erasm . r Subijcite vos . Beza . * See §. 3. 1. Obser . * Treat . 3. §. 2. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1 Cor. 7. 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See §. 82 , 83. 2. Obser . 3. Obser . Adamiani ex Adam dicti , cuius imitantur in paradiso nuditatem . Nuptias auersantur . Nudi itaque mares foeminaeque conueniunt , &c. August . de Haeres . distinct . 31. Promiscuè inter se viri & foeminae , Veneri operam dabant . Philast . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 4. Obser . See Treat . 3. §. 51. 5. Obser . See Treat . 3. §. 54. 6. Obser . 7. Obser . See Treat . 3. §. 70. Obser . Obser . See Treat . 3. §. 73. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Obser . How an husband is a Sauiour to his wife See Treat . 3. §. 73. f 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See more of the manner and extent of a wiues obedience , Treat . 3. §. 51. & 63. 1 Cor. 10. 23. Vers. 27. t Col. 1. 18. u Ephes . 4. 15 , 16. Doctr. d 1 Cor. 8. 6. e Mat. 23. 7 , 8 , 9. f Deut. 18. 15. g Col. 1. 18. 1 Vse . The distinction betwixt imperiall and ministeriall head discussed . Staplet . lib. 6. cap. 16. de princip . doct . 2 Thess . 2. 4. In Decretal . Eph. 1. 21 , 22 , 23 * Mat. 18. 20. & 28. 20. Vse . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 1. Obser . Ruth 3. 1. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Sotera instrip tum vidi Syracusis . hoc quantum est ? Ita magnum , vt Latino vno verbo exprimi non possit . Is est nimirum soter , qui salutem dedit . Cicer. in Ver. act 4. * Heb. 7. 25. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Mat. 1. 21. Doct. Reason . Heb. 7. 25 , 26. Vses . Consolation . Luk. 2. 10 , 11. Luk 1. 47. Vers . 68 , 69. Luk. 2. 29 , 30. Rom. 8. 37. Refut . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Doct. b Luk. 1. 69. c & 2. 30. d Mat. 1. 21. Iesuit a blasphemous title . Why we may be called Christians and not Iesuits . Christus commune dignitatis est nomen . Iesus proprium vocabulum saluatoris . Hier. in Mat. 16. e Act. 4. 12. f Reu. 5. 4 , 5. 1. Vse . g Isa . 63. 3. See The whole Armour of God , Treat . 1. part 1 §. 5. Virum multi salutares dici possint non facile audendum est . Solus enim ipse saluator corporis est . Aug. in Ios . lib. 6. quaest . 23. h Ier. 2. 12 , 13. 2. Vse . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Ecclesia ex vocatione appellata est . Aug. in Epist . ad Rom. Mat. 20. 16. b Heb. 3. 1. c 1 Cor. 1. 2. Rom. 5. 18. Ioh. 6. 37. Vers . 39. Ioh. 17. 12. Act. 1. 17. Vse . How we may know whethe we be of Christs body or no. m Eph. 4. 15 , 16. n Ioh. 17. 6. o Joh. 17. 10 p Gal. 3. 1. Psal . 116. 136. q 1 Ioh. 4. 11. r Mat. 25. 40. ſ Eph. 4. 16. t 1 Cor. 12. 26. u Mat. 1. 21. x Ioh. 10. 15. y Ioh. 17. 9. Ecclesia corpus Christi est : vnde manifestum est , eum qui non est in membris Christi Christianam salutem habere non posse . Aug. de Vnit. Ec l. c. 2. Doctr. Cant. 1. 3. Iohn 10. 27. Reason . Rom. 8. 11. Use . Triall of true Churches . Doctr. 1 Kings 15. 5. 2 Kings 23. 25. Luke 1. 6. Reason . 1 John 3. 9. Iam. 3. 2. Rom. 7. 15. 17. Vse . Triall of integrity . Mark. 6. 20. * Uers . 28 , 29. Husbands duties most pressed . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . “ 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See §. 82. * See the reasons hereof Treat . 4. §. 2. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Iohn 15. 13. b Psal . 16. 2. c Matth. 25. 35 , 40. d 1 Joh. 4. 20. e & vers . 11. * Treat 4 §. 61. &c. Christ himselfe , and all that he did and suffered , are ours . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Mat. 16. 32 , 23 c Iohn 13. 27. d & 18. 2. &c. Audiui , Domine , auditum tuū et expani , dum quaeris à quaerentibus quid quaerant , cùm noueris quod te quaerant : & dixisti te esse lesum Nazarenū . Cypr. de Pass . Christi . e Matth. 26. 53. f & 27. 42. a Mark. 15. 39. h Iohn 2. 19. Matth. 28. 6. i Iohn 10. 18. Indicia dedit nullase necessita e , sed obedientia vrgeri ad mortem . Cypr. de coen . Dom. Reason . k Acts 3. 15. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1. Vse . 2 Cor. 9. 7. 2. Vse . l Ephes . 5. 2. m 1 Tim. 2. 6. n 1 Pet. 1. 18 , 19 o Acts 20. 28. p 2 Pet. 2. 1. Vse . q 2 Cor. 5. 21. r Gal. 3. 13. How the person of Christ being God-man , was giuen for vs. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Symbol . Calced . s 1 Cor. 2. 8. t Act. 20. 28. Doctr. 1 Pet. 1. 19. Vses . Quanta se fiducia spes credentium consolatur considerans quantus quanta pro nondum credentibus passus sit ? Aug. de Doctr. Chr. l. 1. c. 15. Rom. 12. 1. Doctr. b 2 Cor. 5. 21. c Gal. 3. 13. d Gal. 1. 4. e Ioh. 10. 15. f 1. Cor. 13. 5. 1. Vse . * See §. 28. 2. Vse . 1 Cor. 10. 24. Phil. 2. 21. Christ merited not for himselfe . Ioh. 17. 5. Heb. 12. 2. Phil. 2. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See §. 39. Doctr. The Church in her selfe polluted . Ezek. 16. 3. &c. Eph. 2. 3. c Tit. 3. 3. 1 Cor. 6. 11. Ioh. 3. 3 , 5. Our naturall condition oft to be thought of . e Psal . 8. 1 , 4. f Ioh. 14. 22. h 1 Tim. 1. 12. &c. i 2 Sam. 7. 18 , &c. 1 Cor. 4. 7. Tit. 3 3 , &c. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Doct. Ipse nos gratis saluos fecit , ipse nos non eum quaerentes quaesiuit , inuenit , &c. Aug. in Psal . 78. Non est inuenire Domino sed praeuenire . Bern. serm . 78. in Cant. * Idem per idem . Deut. 7. 7 , 8. Difference betwixt Christs loue and Mans. Est . 2 12 , &c. Vse . Rom. 11. 36. Doctr. b 1 Ioh. 1. 7. c Rom. 1. 4. Reason . 1 Vse . Exhortation . 1 Ioh. 3. 3. 2 Vse . Triall . 3 Vse . Reproofe . Doctr. 1 Ioh. 1. 7. Vse . Psal . 32. 1 , 2. Doctr. 1 Cor. 1. 2. Rom. 6. 6. Vse . Rom. 6. 18 , 11. Tit. 2. 11 , 12. Psal . 45. 13. Luk. 1. 6. Vera & perfecta pulcl . ritudo in nullo hominum est nisi in corpore Christi quod interpretatur Ecclesia . Hier. in Ezech. 27. Sinne is in the best . Heb. 4. 13. 1 Job . 1. 8. How the Saints are spotlesse before God. Psal 32. 1 , 2. How the Saints are blamelesse before men . Vna hirundo non facit ver . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1. Doct. Iustificatio non accedit factoribus sed factores legis praecedit . Aug. de Spir. & lit . cap. 26. 2. Doct. Rom. 8. 1. 3. Doct. Iam. 2. 24. Use . Rom. 7. 24. Why water in baptisme is but sprinkled . Doctr. a Ioh. 3. 5. Tit. 3. 5. b Gal. 3. 27. c Rom. 6. 3. d 1 Pet. 3. 21. Luke 3. 3. Acts 2. 38. Rom 4. 11. Acts 8. 39. & 16. 34. Gal. 3. 27. Acts 22. 16. Rom. 3. 3. Rom. 411. Ier. 44. 1 Pet. 3. 21. Aqua exhibet forinsecus Sacramentum gratiae , & Spiritus operatur intrinsecus beneficium gratiae . Aug. Epist . 23. In Baptismo praecipua pars est Spiritus , per quem & aqua sit efficax . Chrys . in Act. Hom. 1. Things necessarie two wayes . Ex Hypothesi . Exhypothesi . Gen. 17. 14. Papists attribute too much to Baptisme . Bellarm. de Bapt lib. 1. cap. 4. Gen. 17. 7. Acts 2. 39. 1 Cor. 7. 14. Gen. 17. 12. Jos . 5. 5. a In Thessalia mos fuit vt paschalibus tantùm d●ebus baptismus perageretur , Niceph. hist . lib. 12. cap. 34. Socrat. hist . lib. 5. cap. 22. b Ne quenquam Sacerdotes baptizent praeterquam in Pasc● a & Pentecosle . L L. Pipi● . Carol. M. &c. c Iustus quacunque morte praeuentus fuerit anima eius in refrigerio erit , dixit Ambr. Orat. de obit . Valent. Qui diem obij● antequam baptisaretur . d Rhem. annot . on Ioh. 3. 5. e Ex opere operato , B● em . loc . citat . Heb. 10. 4. 1 Cor. 1. 21. Rom. 1. 16. Anabaptists extenuate baptisme too much . * §. 41. Ecce quia Christus sanctificat ; ecce quia Christus ipso lauacro aquae in verbo vbi Minister videtur corporaliter operari ipse abluit , ipse mundat . Aug. contr . lit . Petil. l. 3. c. 49. Rom. 6. 3 , 4. 1 Pet. 3. 21. Tit. 3 5. Vse . Matth. 3. 11. Doct. a Mat. 28. 19. b Luk. 3. 3. c Act. 2. 38. & 8. 12 , 37. & 10. 47. & 16. 15 , 33. Reasons . Detrahe verbum & quid est aqua nisi aqua ? accedat verbum ad clementum & fit sacramentum . Aug. in Ioh. 15. tract . 80. 1 Tim. 4. 5. Papists ioyne not the word and seale . 1 Cor. 14. 9. &c. Tit. 2. 12 , 13. 2 Tim. 4. 7 , 8. Men must be iustified and sanctified before they can be glorified . Rom. 8. 30. Reasons . Reu. 21. 10 , 27. 1 Ioh. 3. 2 , 3. Vse . We are here cleansed that we might be hereafter glorified . Ex co quod hic accipit Ecclesia ad illam gloriam quae hic non est , perfectionemque perducitur . Aug. Retract . l. 1. c 7. Heb. 11. 26. & 12. 2. Righteousnes the only meanes to make vs glorious . Reu. 19. 7 , 8. Reason . Psal . 45. 7. Vse . Papists place the glory of the Church in outward pompe . Dionysius Ioui Olympio aureum amiculum detraxit , laneum substituens , non sine dicterio , laneum viz. ad vtram que anni tempestatem esse aptius . Vse . Ubicunque commemoraui ecclesiam non habentem maculam aut rugam , non sic accipiendum , quasi iam sit , sed quae praeparatur vt sit , quando apparebit gloriosa . Aug. Retract . l. 3. c. 18. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Gen. 2. 22. c Est . 2. 13. Doct. d Ioh. 14. 2 , 3. e Phil. 1. 23. f 2 Cor. 5. 8. Reason . g Ioh. 3. 16. h & 17. 6. i Act. 20. 28. k Ose . 2. 19 , 20. l Eph. 4. 8. * Paranymphi . m Ioh. 3. 29. n 2 Cor. 5. 20. o & 11. 2. p Eph. 5. 24. Vse . Incoragement against death . Totum tibi sit Deus : quia horum quae diligis , totum tibi est . Aug. in Ioh. 3. tract . 13. Reu. 21. 22 , 23. Ioh 17. 20 , 21. 1 King. 10. 8. Exo. 33. 23. 1 Cor. 13. 12. 1 Joh. 3 2. Doctr. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Reu. 21. 11. c Dan. 12. 3. d Mat. 13. 43. e 1 Ioh. 3 , 2. f Col. 3 4. g Psal . 45. 13. h Heb. 12. 23. i 1 Cor. 13. 12. k Phil. 3. 21. Ecclesia in fine seculi expectat quo l in Christi corpore praemonstratum est , &c. Aug. Epist . 119. l Luk. 22. 30. m Ioh. 17. 21 n Heb. 1. 14. o 1 Cor. 2. 9. p 2 Cer. 12 4. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . q 2 Cer. 4. 17. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Use . r Isa . 62. 4. s 1 Cor. 4. 13. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . t 1 Ioh. 3. 3. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Doctr. Reu. 7. 17. & 21. 4. Rom. 7. 24. Dan 5. 5. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Heb. 9. 14. 1 Pet. 1. 19. Heb. 12. 23. Vse . Generall vses of the glorious estate of the Church in heauen . Ephes . 1. 18. 1 Eor . 15. 19. * See §. 27. See Treat . 4. §. 74 76. Why the patterne of a mans selfe is added to the patterne of Christ . Sicut corpus nunquam à se dissidet , neque anima aduersus seipsum , ita virum & mulierem non conuenit dissidere . Chrys . in Gen. hom . 45. Ephes . 5. 28. Gen. 2. 23. Matth. 19. 5 , 6. Quia se diligat , & prodesse sibi velit , dubitare dementis est . Aug. de doct . Christ . lib. 1. cap. 25. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Proprie dicitur de galina fouente oua , quum illis incubat . 1 Tim 6. 8. Summ● 28. & 2● Doctr. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Rom. 12. 10 Rom. 1. 30. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 2 Tim. 3. 3. c Mat. 22. 39. d Leu. 19. 18. Isa . 58. 7. e 1 Cor. 12. 26. Jam. 2. 8. f Mat. 7. 12. Reasons . The seuerall kindes of selfe-loue . f 1 Cor. 9. 27. g 2 Cor. 11. 27. h Heb. 11. 36 , 37. Non propterea quisquam dicendus est non diligere salutem , atque incolumitatem corporis sui , quia amplius aliquid diligit : nam a●arus &c. Aug. de doct . Chr. lib. 1. cap. 25. I lle so satis diligit qui sedulo agit vt summo & vero perfruatur bono . Aug. de mor. eccl . l. 1. c. 26. Rom. 13. 14. Phil. 2. 21. 1 Cor. 13. 5. & 10. 24. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1. Vse . 2. Vse . Phil. 1. 10. Mat. 6. 26 , 28. m 1 Cor. 12. 12. n Isa . 58. 7. Doctr. Mar. 5. 5. Reason . Iam. 3. 12. 1 Cor. 9. 27. Heb. 11. 35. &c. * §. 56. 1 Vse . 1 King. 18. 28. Cassian . Collat. 19. D. Willet Synops . Papism . Contr. 6. quaest . 6. Matth. 22. 39. — Quam vellent aethere in alto , Nunc & pauperiem , & duros perferre labores . Uirg . Aen. 6. 2. Vse . Isa . 58. 7. * See §. 55. Doctr. Eccl. 2. 24. & 3. 13. & 5. 18. & 8. 15. 1 Tim. 5. 8. Inconcussa naturae lege diligimus nos ipsos , quae in bestias etiam promulgata est . Aug. de Doct. Chr. li. 1. ca. 26. p Mat. 8. 24. q Luke 14. 1. r Iohn 4. 6. s Ioh. 4. 31. &c. Lawfull fasts no hinderance to the cherishing of the body . Iohn 4. 34. 2 Cor. 12. 15. 1. Reason . Use . 1. Couetous misers . Eccl. 2. 23. & 5. 11 , 12 , 13 , 14. t 1 Tim. 6. 9. u Mark. 10. 23 , &c. x Eccl. 2. 23. Semper eget liquidis , semper abundat aquis . Ouid. in Jbin . 2. They who are too intentiue on their calling . Vnlawfull to desire that our bodies needed no refreshing . 3. They who make excesse in one needfull thing , an hinderance to another . Doct. y 1 Tim. 6. 8. z Prou. 30. 8. a Matth. 6. 11. Mal. 1. 2 , 3. b Deut. 1. 27. c & 9. 28. d Heb. 12. 6. Reason . e Ephes . 2. 3. 1. Vse . Comfort . 2. Use . In couragement . f Ier. 12. 8. g Gen. 1. 28 , 29. Gen. 6. 14. 21. Gen. 45. 7. Exo. 16. 15. and 17. 6. Deut. 8. 4. Ioh. 6. 55. Isa . 61. 10. 1. Vse . Ascribe all to Christ . m Ezek. 20. 11 , 12. Ose . 8. 12. n Ier. 44. 17. Ose . 2. 5 , 8. o Isa . 1. 3. Isa . 5. 4. 2 Vse . Depend on Christ for all things . Heb. 13. 5. Luk. 16. 22. Inference . a Vers . 23. b Vers . 31. c Vers . 28. Summe , 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Paul ranketh himselfe among the members of Christ . Obser . Metaphors which set forth our vnion with Christ . a 1 Pet. 2. 4 , 5 , 6. b Ioh. 15. 5. c 2 Cor. 11. 2. d Eph. 1. 23. and 4. 16. and 5. 23. e 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . f 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . g Corporis . h Ex. i Eph. 4. 16. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . How we are of Christs flesh . f 2 Tim. 2. 8. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . g Rom. 9. 5. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . h 1 Cor. 15. 45 , 47. What being we receiue from Christ . i Tit. 3. 5. k Ephes . 4. 24. l 2 Cor. 5. 17. 2 Pet. 1. 4. Ephes . 4. 24. Why we are said to be of Christs flesh . Gen. 2. 23. Diuinitas vnigeniti facta est particeps mortalitatis nostrae , vt & nos participes eius immortalitatis essemus . Aug. Epist . 57. We are vnited to Christs person . How Saints on earth are vnited to Christ in heauen . 1 Cor. 12. 12 , 13. I. Error . II. Error . Our vnion with Christ a true and reall vnion . Rom. 8. 11. Eph. 2. 6. Ioh. 17. 21 , 22. Unusquisque Christianus non incongruè sustinet personam Christi . Aug. de Gen. l. 2. c. 24. vide eundem quaest . 69. With what bonds we are vnited to Christ . 1 Joh. 4. 13. Eph. 3. 17. Why Christ made the Saints one with himselfe . 1. Saints are members of a glorious body . Coelo , & Angelis , & omni creatura honorabilior est ecclesia . Chrys . de Pentecost . serm . 26. 2. Saints attended by Angels . Heb. 1. 14. 2 King. 6. 17. Psal . 91. 11 , 12. 3. Saints make Christ perfect . Eph. 1. 23. 4. Saints assured of saluation : and how . Eph. 2. 6. Ioh. 5. 24. 1 Ioh. 5. 12. Securi estote caro & sanguis : vsurpastis coelum in Christo : negent & in coelo Christum qui vobis coelum negant . Tertul. de Resur . 5. Difference betwixt Christ gouerning the Saints and the world . Est . 5. 2. Psal . 2. 9. Ioh. 14 3. Psal . 110. 1. 6. Assurance of all needfull supply . Mat. 25. 35. Act. 9. 4. Why Christ suffereth the Saints to want , and suffer . 7. Saints haue a right to what Adam lost . Heb. 1. 2. Psal . 24 1. 1 Cor. 3. 21. 8. Saints haue a right to Christ . See §. 28 Why the Church basely accounted of . 1 Ioh. 3. 1. Corruption of the body no hinderance to our vnion with Christ . 1 Cor. 15. 36. 1 Thes 4. 13. Difference betwixt the preseruation of the Saints bodies and others in the graue . 1 Thes . 4. 14 , 16. Isa . 57. 2. Ioh. 5. 29. * §. 49 , 50. &c. Heb. 3. 6. Mat. 6. 10. Christus habet sanctos voluntate , peccatores verò necessitate sibi subiectos . Hier. in Eph. 1. 2 Cor. 7. 1. 1 Cor. 6. 15. Ephes . 4. 24. Ephes . 210. Ioh. 15. 5. Col. 3. 1 , 2. Rom. 8. 5. Luke 12. 4. Heb. 11. 35. * §. 70. Doct. 2 Cor. 5. 17. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Gal. 3. 27. Reason . 1 Cor. 15. 45. Rom. 8. 11. Vse . Triall whether we be members of Christ . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Ioh. 5. 21. Doctr. a 1 Pet. 1. 3. b Ioh. 3. 5. c Iam. 1. 18. d 1 Cor. 4. 15. Philem. vers . 10. The worke of the three persons in our regeneration . Iam. 1. 18. Joh. 6. 38 , 39. Ioh. 6. 63. Ioh. 1. 13. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Ioh. 3. 3. How regeneration is attributed to the word , and to Ministers thereof . Iam. 1. 18. 1 Cor. 4. 15. 1 Cor. 3. 7. Reason . Use . Ioh. 6. 37. Luke 17. 16. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . a Col. 2. 19. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Ephes . 1. 3. c Joh 15. 5. d Ioh. 6. 55. Reason . e Zach. 13. 1. f Col. 1. 19. g Ioh. 1. 16. 1 Vse : 2. Vse . Ioh. 16. 23. Heb. 13. 15. Col. 3. 17. Doctr. Difference betwixt regeneration and creation . Ioh. 3. 6. The riches of Gods mercie . Psal . 103. 11. Gen. 2. 23 , 24. Inference . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Vers . 28. Gen. 2. 23. b Vers . 28. Gen. 2. 23. Meaning of the words . 1 Cor. 7. 33 , 34. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Glue . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Matrimonium non facit coitus , sed voluntas . Chrysost . in Mat. hom . 32. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Summe . Doct. b Gen. 31. 14. c 1 Sam. 19. 11 Reason . Vse . Parents may not keepe their children being maried too straight . Nor keepe them from husband or wife . Children may not preferre their parents before husband or wife . Apud Romanos sponsa obtecta flammeo capite quum extulisset pedem è paternis aedibus , vertebatur in gyrum , itaque duceb●tur in domumsponsi , nes●iret redeundi viam ad aedes parentum . Erasm . See Treat . 2. part . 2. §. 14. See Treat . 2. part . 2 §. 2. Gen. 2. 24. b Mat. 19. 5. c 1 Cor. 6. 16. d Deut. 6. 13. Mat. 4. 10. e Mal. 2. 15. g Mat. 19. 8. h Deut. 17. 17. Leu. 18. 18. i Gen. 4. 19. Magis pertinere ad nuptiarum bonum , non vnum & multas , sed vnum & vnam , satis indicat ipsa prima diuinitus facta coniugum copula , &c. Aug. de Nupt. & concup . l. 1. c. 9. Gen. 2. 18. Gen. 16. 5. & 21. 11. Stat. 1. Iacob . 11. Doctr. Reason . Mat. 19. 6. Pro. 2. 17. Vses . 1. Mutuall transgressions of man and wife most hainous . Mal. 2. 14. 2. Monstrous to make debate betwixt man and wife . 1 Sam. 26. 19. 3. All duties betwixt man and wife to be cheerefully performed . Isa . 58. 7. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Quod per historiam impletum est in Adam , per prophetiam significat Christum qui reliquit patrem , &c. Aug. de Gen. lib. 2. c. 24. a Ioh. 3. 29. c Cant. 1. 13 , 15. d 2 Cor. 11. 2. e Eph. 5. 23. f & vers . 31. the things which make Christ and the Church fit to be husband and wife . g Ioh. 17. 19. h Ioh. 20. 17. i Rom. 8. 32. k Ioh. 6. 39. l Cant. 2. 16. m Eph. 5. 23 , 24. n Eph. 4 8. o Ioh. 14. 3. p Reu. 22. 17 , 20. 1. Vse . An high fauour to be the spouse to Christ . 1 Sam. 25. 41. Luk. 15. 19. Mar. 1. 7. * §. 33 , 34. 2. Vse . Direction . How Christs spouse must cary her selfe . Est . 1. 16. &c. 3. Vse . Triall . Who are Christs spouse . * §. 24. 4. Vse . Consolation . The priuiledges of Christs spouse . Ecclesia omnem sponsi potestatem tenet . Aug. contr . Don. l. 4. c. 1. Ioh. 1. 18. Prou. 8. 30. Ephes . 4. 9. Ioh. 16. 28. Mark. 3. 33 , 34. Vse . Imitation . All to be forsaken for Christ . Psal . 45. 10. Matth. 10. 37. Luke 14. 26. expounded . How parents to be hated for Christ . Deut. 33. 9. Gen. 41. 4. Matth. 19. 27. Hosea 2. 19. Isa. 61. 8. & 54. 10. Reason . Ioh. 13. 1. Rom. 11. 29. Mal. 2. 16. Ier. 3. 1. Vse . Cleaue to Christ . d Deut. 10. 20. & 13. 4. Acts 11. 23. 1 Sam. 18. 1. Rom. 8. 35. &c. All the Saints made one Spouse . 1 Cor. 12. 13. See §. 22. Gal. 3. 28. Reason . Vse . Christus nihil aliud deputat corpus suum ( i. ) Ecclesiam , quam seipsum , quia de Christo & ecclesia verius intelligitur , Erunt duo in carne una . Aug. de pec . mer. lib. 1. cap. 31. * See §. 70. * §. 84. 1 Cor. 6. 17. & 12. 12. Heb. 10. 27. Heb. 12. 15. Eph. 4. 27. Of a mysterie see more in the whole armour of God , Treat . 3. §. 168. on Eph. 6. 19. 1. Vse . The mysterie of our vnion with Christ not to be measured with the last of our reason . 2. Use . No carnall thing in our vnion with Christ . Ecclesia Christo in occulto vxor est . Occultè quippe atque intus in abscondito secreto spiritali anima humana inhaeret verbo Dei , vt sint duo in carne vna . Aug. contr . Faust . Man. lib. 22. cap. 38. 3. Use . Papists make our vnion with Christ a carnall matter . Joh 6. 52. Ioh. 3. 4. Multos adulteros video qui sponsam tanto pretio emptam possidere volunt , & id agunt vt pro sponso amentur . Aug. in Ioh. Tract . 12. Uide Bern. ep . 237. ad Eugen. * See §. 17. 2 Cor. 11 2. Quod est in Christo & in Ecclesia magnum , hoc in singulis quibusque viris & vxoribus minimum . Aug. de nupt . & concup . lib. 1. cap. 21. * Alphons . à Castro contr . haer . lib. 3. Petrus à Soto de Matr. lect . 2. Concil . Trident. Sess . 24. Can. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Reu. 2. 7. x Luk. 8. 8. Mar. 13. 37. Eph. 5. 14. Rom. 11. 20. Reason . The life of Gods word in application . 1 Cor. 14 9. Vnum duntaxat tibi considerandum est , quo pacto te praestes innoxium . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. Reasons . Act. 20. 35. Rom. 14. 12. Ezec. 18. 5. &c. Luk. 17. 34. Vse . Non quae alijs data sunt praecepta quaerimus quando alicuius criminis ac . cusamur . Chrys . loc . citat . * §. 10. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Who are to be accounted children , who parents . * Treat . 5. §. 56 , 57 , &c. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . All duties of children comprised vnder obedience . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Chap. 5. vers . 22. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Why the morall law is alleaged . A genere ad speciem . Honour compriseth all childrens duties . Why both father and mother expressed . How the fift commandement is the first with promise . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Rom. 13 8. Difference betwixt the promise in the second , and fist commandement . First simply taken . Exod. 13. 2. Matth. 1. 25. Isa . 38. 2 , 3. 1. Vse . 2. Vse . 3. Vse . 4. Vse . Cautions in seeking our owne good . Cic. lib. 2. de Offic. & Paradox . 1. Vse . Nihil bonum Scriptura nisi quod honestum asserit . Ambr. Offic. lib. 2. cap. 3. b Exod. 20. 12. c Deut. 5. 16. Longlife and prosperitie ioyned together . Deut. 5. 16. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Temporall prosperitie promised . 1 Tim. 4. 8. Deut. 5. 16. Prosperitie a good thing . Leuit. 26. 4. &c. Deut. 28. 1. &c. Gen. 28. 20. & 32. 10 , 11. Leuit. 26. 15. &c. Deut. 28. 16. &c. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Psal . 73. 13. Ier. 12. 1. Hab. 1. 3. How prosperitie proues a curse to the wicked . Matth. 5. 45. Rom. 2. 4. Ose . 13. 11. 1 Tim. 6. 9. Gen. 40. 19. Rom. 8. 28. Complaints of Saints impeach not their well being . b Iob. 9. 3. 2 Cor. 12. 9. c Epb. 3. 1. d Psal . 119. 67 e Iob 1. 12. f Ose 5. 15. g 2 Cor. 5. 2. Long life a blessing . Psal . 6. 5. Isa . 38. 18. Phil. 1. 24. Iob. 32. 7. Iob. 9. 4. Gal. 6. 10. Gen. 15. 16. Rom. 2. 5. m 1 King. 14. 13. n 1 King. 13. 14. Isa . 17. 1. o 1 Cor. 11. 32. p Gen. 5. 24. Heb. 11. 5. Deut. 6. 2. Psal . 34. 12 , 13 , 14. Rut. 3. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 How disobedient children hinder their welfare and shorten their daies . Deut. 21. 21. Judg. 9. 5 6. a 1 Sam. 2. 34. b 2 Sam. 18. 14. c 1 King. 2. 25. How fitly prosperity and long life are ioyned together . God makes his sauours true blessings . Gen. 17. 19. Isa . 38. 5 , 6. & 39. 8. 2 Sam. 7. 9. &c. 1. Vse . 2. Vse . 3. Vse . Psal . 37 37 , 38. Eccl. 8. 12 , 13. Isa . 3. 10 , 11. 4. Use . Prou. 22. 6. Doctr. Substance of promises made to the Iewes still remaineth . Heb. 13. 5. Act. 2. 39. Vse . Rom. 15. 4. Rom 4. 23. 1 Cor. 10. 11. Hinc patescit humanae vitae terminum , non esse decreto simplici & absoluto constitutum , &c. Zach. Muthel . in hunc loc . & N. Heming . alijque . Mans time set . Iob 7. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Iob 14. 14. Iob 14. 5. Eccles . 2. 3. Iob. 7. 30. Isa . 38. 5. Mat. 10. 30. & 6 27. Stat sua cuique dies , &c. Virg. Aenied . 10. Vses to be made of the determined time of mans life . Dan. 3. 17 , 18. Iob. 9. 4. Against merit . * Whole armour of God , Treat . 2. Part. 4. §. 7. on Ephes . 6. 14. 1. Obseru . Parents bound to duties . How parents duties are implied in the 5. Commandement . 1. Vse . Ministers must prouoke parents to their dutie . 2. Use . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Vers . 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Occasions of prouoking children to wrath . Heb. 12. 10. * See Treat . 5. §. 31 , 41. 2. Obser . Ezec. 3. 18. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 3. Obser . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Enutrite , Beza . Nourrissez . Fr. 4. Obseru . Parents to prouide all needfull things for children . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 5. Obseru . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 6. Obseru . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , Instituere vt puerili aetati conuenit . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , menti indere . a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b In monitis . 7. Obseru . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c Deut. 6. 7. d Doctus inter Hebr. vocem 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 continuò loqui exponit , ( i. ) inculcare , vel identidem repetere . Innuit studium & diligentiam qua pueris praecepta Dei inculcari debent . Uatabl . in Deut. 6. 7. vide Tr. 6. §. 42. 8. Obser . Pro. 22. 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 9. Obser . * Treat . 6. §. 34. * §. 10. Why the Apostle is so copious in vrging seruants to their dutie . Seruus beneuolentia prosequatur dominum , quamuis impiū . Qui fidelem habet dominum , saluo eius dominio , diligat vt patrem . Conslit . Apost . li. 4. ca. 12. Gal. 4. 28. b 1 Tim. 6. 1 , 2. * Treat . 7. §. 2 , 3. 1. Obser . 2. Obser . 3. Obser . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Origo vocabuli seruorū in Lat. lingua inde creditur ducta , quod hi qui iure belli possint occidi à victoribus cùm seruabaxtur serui fiebant : à seruando appellati . Aug. de Ciu. Dei lib. 19. cap. 15. Uide ●ud Viu . ibid. 4. Obser . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . What masters are meant . 5. Obseru . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 6. Obseru . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Why masters are said to be after the flesh . Dominis carnalibus . vet . transl . Heb. 12. 9. 1 Cor. 7. 22. 7. Obseru . Seruants feare of their masters . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Difference betwixt feare and trembling . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Vers . 33. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Rom. 13. 3 , 4. 8. Obser . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 9. Obser . 1 Sam. 16. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 10. Obseru . * §. 96. Opposita iuxta se posita magis elucescunt . 11. Obser . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . What eie-seruice is . 11. Obser . Men pleasers . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Gal. 1. 10. Tit. 2. 9. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . How masters are to be pleased in all things . 12. Obseru . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Who are seruants of Christ . Quo pacto servus non est servus ? Cum prop ter Deum omnia facit . Chrys . in 1 Cor. 7. hom . 19. 13. Obseru . Ioh. 5. 30. 14. Obseru . 15. Obseru . 16. Obseru . What it is to serue with good will. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 17. Obseru . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Obiect . Answ . 18. Obseru . 19. Obseru . Difference betwixt seruants of men , and of Christ . Why seruants are put in minde of Gods reward . 20. Obser . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 21. Obser . A genere ad speciem . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . m 1 Cor. 15. 38. n 2 Cor. 9. 6. o 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Gal. 6. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . p 1 Sam. 2. 30. 22. Obser . 23. Obser . 24. Obser . 25. Obser . 26. Obser . 27. Obser . 1. Obser . Col. 4. 1. * §. 124. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * §. 3. * Treat . 8. §. 20 , 44. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Or , moderating . a Col. 3. 19. b Ephes . 6. 4. * See Treat . 8. §. 14. 2. Obser . Authoritie to be kept in compasse . 3. Obser . Excesse in dutie not good . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 4. Obseru . 5. Obseru . 1 Tim. 6. 15. Gen. 50. 19. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 6. Obseru . Matth. 23. 8. & 18. 28. Psal . 2. 4 , 10 , 11. Iob 22. 13 , 14. c 1 King. 8. 27. d Ier. 23. 23. e Matth. 5. 34 , 35. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Psal . 113. 5. g Psal . 102. 19. h & 33. 13. i Prou. 15. 3. Psal . 123. 1. Eccles . 5. 8. 7. Obseru . Heb. 11. 27. 8. Obseru . 9. Obser . 10. Obseru . a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1 Sam. 16. 7. Iob. 34. 19. 11. Obser . Notes for div A68107-e78040 Who are husband and wife . * See Treat . 1. §. 82. & 84. Who may marie . * Ephebi . Vt iustas nuptias contrahant , sint masculi puberes , foeminae viripotentes . Iustin . Instit . l. 1. tit . 10. Gen. 2. 22. 1 Cor. 7. 36. a Iustin . Instit . l. 1. tit . 22. Second part of Reports of Cases . 35. Hen. 6. fol. 41. b. * Est invenum coniugium incommodum liberorum procreationi . Cum enim in omnibus animantibus imperfecti sunt iuniorum partus , ac multo etiam magis foeminarum , id etiam fiat in hominibus necesse est . Arist . Pol. lib. 7. b 1 Chr. 22. 5. & 29. 1. c 2 Chro. 12. 13. d 1 King. 2. 22. e & 3. 7. f 1 King. 11. 4. 2 Chro. 28. 1. & 29. 1. Broughton in his Concent of Script . m 2 Chro. 36. 9. n 2 King. 24. 8. o 2 Chro. 27. 1. 2 Chro. 26. 21. Parents sinne in marying children vnder age . Puella dum ei aetas matura non est , nulli dari vel promitti debet . Aug. epist . 233. Matrimonium contractum verum non est si impubes fuerit qui contraxit . Azpilcuet . Consil . & resp . l. 4. de spons . Cons . 8. Mat. 19. 12. A sinne to conceale any impotencie . Sterilem coniugem fas non est relinquere . Aug. de Nup. lib. 1. cap. 10. b Gen. 18. 11. c Luk. 1. 7. d Gen. 25. 21. e 1 Sam. 1. 5 , 20. f Tantum valet sociale vinculū coniugum , vt cùm causa procreandi colligitur , nec ipsa causa procreandi soluetur . Aug. de bon . Coniug . cap. 7. Gen. 2. 18. 2 Chro. 26. 21. A sinne to conceale a contagious disease . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Heb. 13. 4. 1 Tim. 4. 1 , 3. 1 Cor. 7. 2 , 9. a Mat. 19. 12. A deuillish doctrine to forbid mariage . b 1 Cor. 7. 7. c Act. 15. 10. d Uide Chrysost . hom . 4. in Isay 6. e Omnes Apostoli exceptis Iohanne & Paulo vxores habuerunt . Ambr. in 2 Cor. 11. * Tolle de Ecclesia honorabile connubium , nonne reples eam concubinarijs incesluosis , seminifluis mollibus , masculorum concubitoribus , & omni denique genere immundorum ? Bernard . in Cant. Serm. 66. vide Bernard . de Conuers . ad ●ler . cap. 29. f Huldricus , seu vt alij , Volusianus in Epist . ad Nichol. Pap. g Vtinam qui continere non valent perfectionem temerariè profiteri , aut coelebatui dare nomina vererentur . Sumptuosa siquidem turris est , & verbum grande , quod non omnes capere possunt . Bernard . de Conuers . ad Cler. serm . 29. a Gen. 2. 18. Necessarie for the essence of mariage . b Gen. 2. 20. Buggerie . 1. Persons of the same kind . * Leu. 18. 23. c Vide Aug. de Ciuit. Dei lib. 15. cap. 23. & Lud. Uivem in eundem de Incubis , & Succubis . 2. Persons of diuers sexes . Maritalis copula requirit sexuum aptitudinem . Bern. in Cant. serm . 66. Vnnaturall commixtions . Rom. 1. 25 , 26. 3 Persons without the degrees of consanguinity . Incest . O mulieris scelus incredibile , & praeter hanc vnam in omni vita inauditū . O libidinem effrenatam & indomitam ! O audaciam , singularem ! Non timuisse vim deorum , hominumque famam ? Vicit pudorem libido , timorem audacia , rationem amentia . Cic. pro. A. Cluent . * §. 24. cap. 5. a Mat. 19. 5. b Deut. 22. 22 , 23 , 24. 2 Thes . 2. 3 , 4. 4. Persons that are free . c Treat . 1. §. 83. Deut. 25. 5 , 9. Non concederet hoc Paulus nisi liceret . At parum dico concedit : vult quoque . Volo , inquit , adolescentiores nubere : nec dubium quin viduas dicat . Bern. serm . 66. in Cant. b Rom. 7. 2. * §. 24. Quid largam benedictionem nuptiarum restringis ? Bern. loc . ●itat . Dominus tot maritorum mulierem nulla suae sententiae significatione damnauit . Aug. de bon . Vid. c. 12. a Secundas nuptias pro fornicationibus habent . Aug. de haer . §. 26. b Tertullianus factus est haereticus quia transiens ad Cataphryges cepit secundas ruptias ●●nquam ●upra damnare . Ibid. §. 86. * Treat . 1 §. 83 Ministerijs minorum ordinum exercendis suffici possunt coniugati , dummodo non bigami . Concil . Trid. §. 23. c. 17. Vide Bellarm. de Cler. l. 1. c. 23. Acqualē ducito Pittaci dictum . Sivis nubere , nube pari . Ouid. 1. Equalitie in age . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Arist . Eth. l. 8. c. 12. Luk. 1. 7. Most meet that husbands be elder then wiues . Gen. 17. 17. Vnmeet for aged persons to mary young ones . Vnmeet for young persons to mary aged . * Ne discrepent aetates sic vt vir suscipere liberos possit ; mulier non possit ; aut haec possit , ille non possit . Ex his enim seditiones , discordiaeque , &c. Arist . Pol. lib. 7. 2 Equalitie in estate . Premitur magno coniuge nupta minor . Ouid. epist . 9. 3 3. Equalitie in condition . Eas vxores quas inferioris gradus homines ducant , hi qui altioris dignitatis sunt ducere legibus propter dignitatem prohibentur . Digest . lib. 23. cap. 2. §. 49. A fault to affect to mary a person much aboue ones ranke . Qui longè praestantiores se ducunt , non coniugum viri , sed serui fiunt dotiū . Plut. de Instit . liber . Pro. 14. 1. and 12. 4. A fault to mary a person much vnder ones ranke . Judg. 14. 2. Iudg. 14. 7. Too eager and hasty pursuing after mariage , a brutish thing . Iudg. 21. 23. Gen. 6. 2. Ubi non est consensus vtriusque , non potest esse matrimonium . Instit . iur . can . lib. 2. de nupt . tit . 11. Mos ille vete ribus erat ante multum tempus sponsalia facere . Chrys . in Gen. Hom. 43. Gen. 2. 22. a Gen. 4. 1. b Gen. 2. 25. * Deut. 22. 24. Gen. 19. 14. Consuetudine Scripturarum sponsi viri , & sponsae vocantur vxores . Hier. in Mat. 1. d Gen. 19. 14 , 8. Quia iam desponsatio facta erat , ideo vocat eos generos . Chrys . in hunc loc . e Deut. 22. 22 , &c. Luk. 1. 27. * In the end of §. 13. Nonnullis sponsis tam impotens est ardor libidinis , vt corpusculo puellari vim adferant . Eras . in Inst . Matr. * See §. 15. a Deut. 22. 24. b Luk. 1. 27. Rubr. before the forme of solemnizing of matrimony . Luk. 1. 27. 56. Mat. 1. 20. Vnlawfull for parties contracted long to absent themselues each from other . Deut. 24. 5. 1 Cor. 14. 40. 1 Cor. 11. 16. 1 Pet. 2. 13. d Heb. 13 4. e Treat . 1. §. 80 , 81 , 82 , &c. f Prou. 2. 17. Coniugium benedictione sacer dotali sanctificari oportet . Ambr. epist . 70. Ioh. 3. 20. Magnifico conuiuio nuptiae celebrantur : laeta omnia , munera sponsalia , &c. Greg. Naz. ad Vital . vide plura ibid. de coniugij solennitate . Mariage a time of reioycing . a Isa . 62. 5. b Ier. 33. 11. c Ier. 7. 34. Ioel 2. 16. d Gen. 29. 22. e Iudg. 14. 11. f Ioh. 2. 2. g Mat. 22. 3. h Isa . 61. 10. Ier. 2. 32. Abuse of mariage feasts . Jsa . 22. 12 , 13. Luk. 15. 13. Luk. 21 34. Isa . 5. 11. Isa . 5. 12. Am. 6. 6. Direction for mariage feasts Iudg. 14. 12. Eph. 5. 19. Ioh. 2. 1 , 2. Dan. 5. 5. Nehe. 8. 10. Gen. 2. 18 , 21 , 22 Gen. 2. 18. Cui hoc dicitur ? non creatae alicui potentiae , sed ei qui exse natus est , Consiliario admirabili , &c. Chrys . in Gen. hom . 14. Prima societas in ipso coniugio est &c. Id autē est principium vrbis , & quasi seminarium reip . Cic. Offic. lib. 1. Qui tentationum procell as cum difficultate salutis tolerant , coniugij portum petant . Greg. in Post . part . 3. admon . 28. Ad adiumentum mulier data est viro. Ambr. Offic. l. 1. c. 28. Ut non solum honestè , sed & commodè viuat . Chrys . in Gen. 2. hom . 14. Licet adiuvent hominem laboribus suis multa irrationabilla , nullum tamen par est rationali mulieri . Chrys . ibid. * Rom. 3. 1. Unusquisque in liberis suis quodammodo renascitur &c. Plato dè Leg. lib. 4. y Appian . lib. 2. debel . ciu . z Sucton . in Aug. * Arist . Polit. li. 2. cap. 7. & Codic lib. 10. tit . 63. Gen. 29. 26. a 1 Cor. 7. 26. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Vers . 1. c Vers . 38. d Saturniliani de quibus Epiph. haer . 23. e Si quis coinquinationem vocet legitimā commixtionem , habet inhabitatorem draconem Apostatam . Ignat. Epist . ad Philad . Uirginitas non est iussa sed admonita . Bernard . de modo benè viu . serm . 21. De virginitate praeceptum non habemus : volentium potestati id relinquimus . Constit . Apost . li. 4. cap. 14. 1 Cor. 7. 32 , 33 , 34. S. Ecclesia & virginitatem glorificat , & nuptias pudicas honorat . Epiph. haer . 48. Notes for div A68107-e86110 x De necessitate ad esse . y De honestate ad benè esse . 1 Cor. 7. 10 , 11. 1 Cor. 7. 12 , 13. Gen. 2. 18 , 22 , 24 Mat 19. 6. * See Treat . 1 §. 79 , 80. Infidelis discedens in matrimonium peccare dignoscitur : itaque non est ei fides seruanda coniugij . Ambr. in 1 Cor. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Phot. in 1 Cor. 7. Luth. de matrim . Calu. epist . 227. Beza in lib. de Diuort . P. Martyr in 1 Cor. 7. 13. Melanct. in loc . de Coniug . Zanchius de Oper. Dei lib. 4. cap. 1. 1 Cor. 11. 2. 1 Thess . 4. 4. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1 Tim. 5. 5. Paphnutius congressum cum legitima vxore castitatem esse dicebat . Socr. hist . Eccl. l. 1. cap. 11. a Qui leges coniugij seruat homini continenti par sit . Greg. Naz. Cygn . Carm. b Clerici castitatem professi matrimonium contrahere non possunt . Concil . Trid. § 24. Can 9. Siricius & Innocentius 3. Gratian. Decr. distinct . 31. 82. 1 Cor. 7. 5. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Non dixit simpliciter vt oretis , sed vt vacetis orationi : ac sirem impediat , non coinquinet . Chrys in 1 Cor. 7. hom . 19. 1 Cor. 7. 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Prou. 5. 19. See more of this text in Treat . 4. §. 11. Tit. 2. 5. Reasons for mariage-chastitie . 1. Chastitie one end of mariage . 1 Cor. 7. 2. Ibid. vers . 9. 2. By chastitie a godly seed preserued . Mal. 2. 16. 3. Chastitie the honour of mariage . Heb. 13. 4. a Matth. 5. 32. b Matth. 19. 9. Christus ab adultera vero separari permittit . Greg. Naz. Orat. 36. Vir post fornicationem non est vir , Chrys . hom . 19. in 1 Cor. 7. c 1 Cor. 6. 16. d Postquam Christus ait adulterae , nec ego te damnabo : vade , deinceps noli peccare , quis non intelligat , debere maritum ignoscere quod videt ignouisse Dominum ambor um : nec iam se debere adulteram dicere cuius poenitentis crimen diuina credit miseratione deletam ? Aug. de adult . Coniug . lib. 2. cap. 6. Adultery as great a sinne in a man as in his wife . Lex Jul. de Adult . l. 1. Orif . Codic . in l. Illust . Greg. Sayr . Clau. reg . l. 9. c. 16. More inconueniences of a womans adultery , then a mans . a Mat. 19. 5. b 1 Cor. 7. 3 , 4. c Vers . 5. d Vers . 15. Tanto grauius viros puniri oportet , quanto magis ad eos pertinet & virtute vincere , & exemplo regere soeminas . Aug. de adult . Coning . l. 2. c. 8. a 7. Commandement . b Prou. 2. 17. c 1 Cor. 6. 16. d 1 Cor. 6. 19. e Gen. 34. 31. f Prou. 6. 35. g Gen. 21. 10. Iudg. 11. 2. Deut. 23. 2. h Leuit. 21. 9. Gen. 34. 7. 2 Sam. 13. 22. i Iob 31. 12. 2 Sam. 12. 10. k Gen. 34. 27. Iudg. 20. 10. Hos . 4. 3. l Mal. 2. 15. m Prou. 6. 32. n 1 Cor. 6. 18. o Prou. 6. 33. p Prou. 6. 26. The bitter fruits of Adulterie . Gods iudgements against adulterie . q Prou. 22. 14. r Hos . 4. 2 , 3. ſ Reu. 21. 8. t Gen. 6. 2 , &c. u Ezek. 16. 50. * Leuit. 18. 28. x Num. 25. 9. y Ier. 5. 7 , 8 , 9. z Heb. 13. 4. * Heb. 10. 31. a Pro. 6. 25. b Iob 31. 1. c Pro. 7. 21. d Ephes . 5. 4. e Pro. 7. 13. f Pro. 6. 29. g Pro. 7. 25. h Ephes . 5. 7. i Gen. 19. 33. k Ezek. 23. 6 , 15 , 40. l Gen. 39. 9. Pro. 2. 16. l Gen. 39. 9. Pro. 2. 16. m 1 Cor. 7. 2 , 3 , 5 , 9. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . n 1 Cor. 7. 4. o 1 Cor. 7. 2 , 3. p Vers . 5. * Dum solitudinis me deserta vallarent , ardorem naturae ferre non poteram : quem cùm crebris ieiunijs frangerem , mens cogitationibus aestuabat . Hier. ad Rust . Mon. Lege eundem ad Eustoc . de custod . virgin . * Hebraei inquiunt perinde vt homicidam reum esse qui temerè semen profundit . Merc. in Gen. 38. 9. q Io●l 2. 6. r 1 Cor. 7. 5. ſ Quo tempore si vir coierit cū muliere , dicuntur concepti foetus vitium seminis tral ere : ita vt leprosi & elephantiaci ex hac conceptione nascantur . Hier . in Lam. 1. * Aug. de bon . coniug . ca. 6. Amb. in 1 Cor. 7. t Nemo Essenorum cū praegnante concumbit . Ioseph . de bel . Iud. li. 2. c. 7. * Quod in bestijs ipso naturae iure praescriptū est , vt praegnantes ad partum vsque non coeant , hoc in hominibus sciant arbitrio relictum . Hier. in Eph. 5. Sanchez de Matr. lib. 9. disp . 21 , 22. agit de petendo & reddendo debito quando menstruum est : & tempore praegnationis , & dū infans lactatur . * Treat . 4. §. 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Tit. 2. 4. Col. 3. 19. Hoc verum est coniugium , quando vinculo charitatis sunt concatenati . Chrys . hom . 45. in Gen. a Rom. 13. 10. b Col. 3. 14. 1 Cor. 16. 14. Matth. 5. 44. * Treat . 1. §. 79 , 80. 1 Sam. 18. 1. Prou. 18. 22. That which in Treat . 4. §. 2. 9. 11. is spoken of an husbands loue and intire affection , may also be applied in some respects to a wife : and so serue to amplifie this common mutuall dutie of loue . Loue of after venters to be as intire as of former . Rom. 7. 2 , 3. Prou. 10. 7. * See Treat . 3. § 8. & Treat . 4. §. 10. Ephes . 4. 3. Heb. 12. 14. * §. 14. Prou. 21. 9. Portus est mulier , & maximū securitatis remedium . Si ventis & fluctibus portum liberaueris ex foro reuersus tranquillè viues . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. Directions for maintaining peace betwixt Man and Wife . 1. Auoid offence . 2. Take not offence . 3. Offer reconciliation . Eph. 4. 26. Mat. 5. 9. 4. Take no part with others . 5. Make not comparisons . 6. Be not iealous . Pro. 6. 34 , 35. 7. Please one another . 1 Cor. 7. 33 , 34. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Cùm vir & vxor domi dissentiunt , nihilo melius naui iactata domus illa disponitur , cùm gubernator aduersus prorae directo . rem dissentiat . Chrys . loc . citat . Gen. 13. 8. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Vide Musc . in Gen. 2. 22. See Treat . 1. §. 79. Psal . 45. 10. 1 Pet. 3 7. 1 Cor. 7. 12 , 13. e Iudg. 19. 3. f Gen. 31. 14. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 coniux . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vxor . Reasons for cohabitation . Benefits of cohabitation . D. Fulke against Rhem. on 1 Cor. 7. §. 6. * §. 3. b Numb . 32. 26 , 27. c 2 Sam. 11. 3 , 6. d Exo. 18. 2. Absence , 1. not without consent . 1 Cor. 7. 5. 2. Not with delight . Si vir ad peregrina contenderit , nulla longin . quitas , nulla absentia complacitam minuat charitatem . Ambr. Hexaem . l. 5. c. 7. Si quis dixerit Ecclesiam errore cùm ob multas causas separationem inter coniuges quoad thorum , sen cohabitationem , ad certum , incertumue tempus fieri posse decernit , Anathema sit . Concil . Trid. §. 24. can . 8. * Bellarm. de Matrim . l. 1. c. 14. Heb. 13. 4. * See §. 5. a Matth. 5. 32. Fidei gratia vxorem ne eijcias . Chrys . hom . 19. in 1 Cor. 7. Si ferus moribus fit coniux , perferat illum vxor , nec vllam ob causam societatem , vinculumque dissoluere patiatur . Basil . Hexaem . bom . 7. Matth. 5. 29. Matth. 5. 32. Hos . 4. 15. Man and wifes fault in parting roomes and beds in the same house . Prou. 31. 12. Prayer a mutuall dutie . 1 Pet 3. 7. Gen. 25. 21. Matth. 7. 7. I am . 5. 16. Gen. 25. 21. a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Luke 18. 1. b 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1 Thess . 5. 17. Intemperans in coniugio quid aliud nisi quidam adulter vxoris est ? Aug. ex Ambr. contr . Iulian. lib. 2. Quam chara sint carendo intelligunt . Cic. in Orator . Amicitiae quid haberent voluptatis carendo magis intellexi quàm sruendo . Idem in oration . post red . Admonendi sunt coniuges vt exhortantes inuicem saluent . Greg. in Past . part . 3. Adm. 28. a 1 Cor. 7. 16. b 1 Pet. 3. 1. c Epb. 5. 25. Of the particular dutie of husbands in this respect , See Treat . 4. §. 47. 1 Pet. 3. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1 Pet. 3. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Eph. 5. 23. 1 Cor. 7. 12 , 13 A wofull thing that one flesh should be in heauen and hell . Luk. 17. 34. Meanes of conuersion the best cause of loue . b 1 Thess . 5. 11 c Heb. 12. 15. Spiritual edification a main end of matrimoniall coniunction . d Col. 2. 19. e Eph. 4. 16. d Col. 2. 19. Man and wife to preuent sin in one another . 1 Cor. 7. 5. g Gen. 27. 6 , &c. h Gen. 25. 23. By preuenting sinne in each other , they keepe iudgements from themselues . Num. 16. 27 , 32 Direction for preuenting sinne . 1 Sam. 25. Leu. 19. 17. It is a branch of hatred to suffer sin to lie on any . Mat. 18. 16. 1 Sam. 1. 4. &c. 2 King. 4. 10. How growth in grace may be helped forward . Nemo magister ita persuadere poterit quemadmodum vxor . Chrys . hom . 19. 1 Cor. 7. Maritum co adducito vt sanctorum dierum rationem habeat . Greg. Naz. ad Olymp. 1. Great need thereof . 2. Husbands and wiues may be very helpfull one to another therein . 1. Care only for temporall things . 2. Vnworthy walking . 3. Negligence in preuenting sin . Mat. 27. 19. 4. Man-pleasing . Eph. 6. 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Diabolus saepe sollicitus est subuertere viros per os coniugum . Orig. in Iob. lib. 2. 5. Vndue feare of offence . 6. Scoffing at the signes of grace . 2 Sam. 6. 20. a Eph. 5. 29. b Eph. 5. 31. c Gen. 2. 18. d Gen. 27. 14. Pro. 17. 17. Gen. 2. 18. Pro. 18. 22. * Gen. 2. 18. Iob 2. 9. Iob 19. 17. a Mat. 1. 19. b 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c 2 Sam. 11. 5. Pro. 31. 28. 1. A good name is pretious . e Eccl. 7. 3. f Pro. 22. 1. 2. The good name of the one is the honour of the other . Directions concerning a good name . 1. Preuent an ill name , and that 1. By concealing things of ill report . g Mat. 1. 19. h 1 Pet. 4. 8. 2. By closing eares against ill reports . 3. By forbearing to censure rashly . Mat. 1. 19. 2 Sam. 6. 20. 1 Sam. 25. 25. 2. Redresse an ill name . Iudg. 19. 1 , 2 , &c. 1 Sam. 25. 37. 3. Procure a good report . l Pro. 31. 28 , 29. 4. Preserue a good name . m Col. 1. 3 , 4. 2 Cor. 9. 4. Eccles . 10. 1. 5. Manifest a care of one anothers good name . n Rom. 12. 15. Contrarie vices . 1. To discredit each other , and that 2 Sam. 6. 20. 1. By blazing one anothers infirmities abroad . p Gen. 9. 22 , 25. 2. By hearing and beleeuing others ill reports . 3. By turning euerie thing to the worst . 4. By concealing euill rumors . 5. By enuying and gainesaying good reports . 2. Neglect of each others fame . Treatise 3. §. 29. a 1 Tim. 5. 8. See Treat . 4. §. 46. b Gen. 2. 18. c Prou. 18. 22. d Prou. 31. 12. e Vers . 11. f Gen. 31. 40. g Prou. 31. 10. &c. Externa negotia viro permitte . Greg. Naz. ad Olymp. h Tit. 2. 5. i 1 Tim. 5. 14. Contrary vices . 1. Couetousnesse . 2. Prodigality . 1 Tim. 5. 8. 3. Idlenesse . a 1 Tim. 3. 4. b Vers . 12. c Gen. 18. 19. d & 35. 2 , &c. e J●s● 4. 15. f Psal . 101. 2. &c. g Ioh. 4 53. h 1 Tim. 5. 14. i Prou. 31. 11 , &c. k Mater-familias . l Pater-familias . m 1 Tim. 2. 12. n Pro. 31. 4. o Acts 18. 26. 1. Reason . Husbands and wiues by their mutuall assistance bring great help one to another . Plus vident oculi quàm oculus . Arist . Polit. li. 3. c. 7. 2. Reason . Many things in a family more fit for the one to meddle with , then for the other . In familia dispertita sunt officia : suntque alia viri , alia vxoris propria . Pro ▪ sunt ergo vterque alteri sua in commune confe rentes : ob eamque causam suauitas in hac tali amicitia inest , vtilitasque maxima . Arist . Eth. li. 8. ca. 12. Vices contrary . 1. When husbands put off all gouernment to their wiues . a 1 Sam. 3. 12 , 13. b 2 Sam. 15. 2. When wiues refuse to adde their aide . 3. When husbands or wiues are hinderances each to other . Pro. 21. 9. a Heb. 13. 2. Rom. 12. 13. b 1 Tim. 3. 2. c & 5. 10. d Gen. 18 6. &c. e 2 King. 4. 8. Reasons . 1. Hospitality a commendable dutie . f Heb. 13. 2. 2. The entertainment will be the better by a mutuall helpe . g Gen. 18. 7. h Vers . 6. 3. Guests will be more cheerefull . 4. Mutuall loue will be more firme . 5. A desire of one anothers good manifested . i 1 Tim. 5. 8. a Neh. 8. 10. b Pro. 31. 20. c Vers . 28. * Treat . 3. §. 23. 33. e Prou. 19. 17. f 2 Cor. 9. 6. g Luke 16. 9. h Iob 29. 13. & 31. 20. i Matth. 5. 7. k Mat. 25. 34. l Heb. 13. 16. m Acts 20. 35. 2. Husband and wife in place to giue good direction one to another . Vices contrarie . 1. Vnmercifulnesse of the husband . n 2 Cor. 9. 7. 2. Binding his wiues hands . Read Iam. 5. 1 , 2. &c. Notes for div A68107-e102240 a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c As vnto the Lord. d As the Church is subiect to Christ . e 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , In euerie thing . * Treat . 4. §. 2. Maritum habere Dominum meruit mulieris culpa , quod tamen nisi seruetur , deprauabitur ampliùs natura , & augebitur culpa . Aug. de Gen. ad lit . lib. 11. c. 37. Ante peccatum non aliter factam fuisse decet credere mulierem nisi vt vir ei dominaretur . Ibid. Quem vocavit ad culpam mulier , iustum est vt eum gubernatorem assuma● , ne iterum foeminea facilitate labatur . Ambr. Hexaem . l. 5. c. 7. * Treat . 4. §. 6 , 7. Proofes that the husband is aboue the wife b Rom. 13. 1. Mari & foeminae ae natura tribuium est , vt hi , praesit , illa obediat , cum mas praestantior sit . Arist . Pol. lib. 1. c 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . d 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 e 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 f 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . g 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . h Sicapilli pro velamine dati sunt , qua gratia aliud addendū est velamen ? Vt non tantum natura , sed etiam voluntate subiectam se esse confiteatur . Chrys . in 1 Cor. hom . 26. 1. Wiues must acknowledge a superioritie in husbands . Of all that are inferiours , the wife commeth neerest to a paritic . b Gen. 2. 21. c 1 Cor. 11. 12. d 1 Cor. 7. 4. Cùm de pudicitia sermonem habet , magna paritas . Chrys . hom . 19. in 1 Cor. 7. e 1 Pet. 3. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . f Gen. 1. 28. g & 16. 4. Obiect . Answ . h Possunt coniuges per charitatem seruire inuicem , sed mulierem non permittit Apostolus dominari in virum . Aug. de Gen. ad lit . l. 11. c. 37. * Treat . 4 §. 9. All wiues must acknowledge their owne husbands worthy of honour . b 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Eph. 5. 22 , 24. c 1 Pet. 3. 1 , 5. 1 Cor. 7. 2. Wiues inferiour to those ouer whom they were before mariage . Subiection due to husbands of euill qualities . d 1 Pet 3. 1 , 2. A peruerse opinion to thinke other husbands worthy of honour , and not their owne . * See Treat . 2. part . 1. §. 9. * See Ibid. Indecens est vt mulier magistra viri fiat . Orig. in Isa . hom . 7. Prou. 30. 21 , 22. Eccle. 10. 16. * Treat . 4. §. 11 Wiue-like feare . a Gen. 18. 12. b Eph. 5. 33. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c 1 Pet. 3. 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . d 1 Cor. 7. 34. True feare a ground of other duties . e 2 Sam. 6. 16. f Uers . 20. How feare may be wrought in a wiues heart . A base esteem which wiues haue of their husbands , ariseth 1. From selfe-conceit . g 1 King. 21. 7. h 1 King. 11. 4. i 2 King. 8. 18. k Gen. 3. 6. 2. From their husbands infirmities . 3. From vniust suspicions . l 2 Sam. 6. 20. How wiues may redresse a light esteeme of their husbands . m 1 Cor. 13. 7. * Treat . 4. §. 4. A wiues outward reuerence . A wiues reuerence in her gesture . a Gen. 24. 65. b 1 Cor. 11. 10. c 1 Pet. 3. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . d 1 Tim. 3. 11. Difference betwixt wantonnesse and familiarity . Gen. 26. 8 , 9. * See Treat . 4. §. 42. * Treat . 4. §. 13 , 22. Cant. 4. & 6. & 7. Is cui leonum cura commissa est , blanda manu , mollique verborum sono permulsos domat . Greg. Naz. ad Olymp. * Treat . 4. §. 15. 1. A wiue-like courtesie worketh a good respect in her husband to her . 2. It maketh her husband be honoured of others . 3. It bringeth honour to her selfe . Contrary scorne in wiues . * Treat . 4. §. 49 , 52. 1 Tim. 2 9. 1 Pet. 3. 3. Contrarie wiues attire not fitting their husbands state or place . Quae se pingit comitque secus quàm viro gratum esse nouit , satis declarat sese pluribus velle placcre quàm oportet mulierem pudicam , cuius praecipua laus est vni placuisse cui desponsata est . Erasm . Instit . Matr. * Treat . 4. §. 24. a Matt. 12. 34. A wiues words in her husbands presence must be few . b 1 Tim. 2. 12. c 1 Cor. 14. 35. d Iob 32. 6. Contrarie too much prate . * Treat . 4. §. 24. a 1 Tim. 2. 12. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . a 1 Tim. 2. 12. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Reuerend titles to be giuen to husbands . * See §. 3. b Gen. 18. 12. c 1 Pet. 3. 6. d Gen. 12. 19. & 20. 2. e & 26. 9. * Treat . 4. §. 24. &c. a 1 Pet. 3. 4. b 2 King. 4. 10. 22. c Matt. 27. 19. d 2 Sam. 25. 31 , 37. Contrary wiues shrewish speeches to their husbands . e Gen. 30. 1. f 1 King. 21. 7. g Exo. 4. 25 , 26. h 2 Sam. 6. 20. i Iob 2. 9. Prou. 19. 13. * Treat . 2. Part. 2. §. 36. Gen. 18. 12. Cant 5. 10. &c. Luke 2. 48. Contrary wiues bitter speeches behind their husbands backs . * See more hereof Treat 2. part 2. §. 36. a Gen. 3. 16. b Ephes . 5. 22. c 1 Pet. 3. 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . d Ephes . 5. 23. e 1 Pet. 3. 6. f Ester 1. 17. g Gen. 3. 16. Contrary to obedience , stoutnesse . * See §. 49. In two cases a wife hath power to order things of her selfe , without her husbands consent . 1 In case of her husbands impotency . 1 Pet. 3. 1 , 2. 2 In case of impossibilitie for her husband to doe it . 1. A generall consent . a Prou. 31. 10 , &c. b Vers . 11. c Vers . 23. 2. A particular consent . d Gen. 16. 6. e 1 Sam 1. 23. 4. An implicit consent , f Num 30. 8. g 2 King. 4. 10 , 23. h 1 Sam. 1. 11. i 1 Sam. 1. 23. Gen. 3. 16. Gen. 31. 32. Quaedam bona sunt propria vxoris , vt sunt bona paraphernalia . Greg. Sayr . Clau. reg . l. 9. c. 16. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 bona apud iurisconsultos , dicuntur 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 ( i. ) quae sponsa praeter dotem à parentibus pactam secum fert : vel ( vt Sayrus loc . citat . ) habet legata ei , seu donata . 1 Tim. 5. 14. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . a 1 Sam. 25. 18. &c. b Gen. 2. 18. c Ose . 6. 6. Mat 9. 13. & 12. 7. * Treat . 4. §. 54. Non potest vxor ex bonis communibus occulte accipere ad donandum vel ad erogandum in alios vsus sine expressa , aut praesumpta saltem viri licentia . Gre● . Sayr . loc . citat . a Gen. 3. 16. b §. 17. c Gen. 4. 7. How the law of subiection is applied to younger brothers . Gen. 27. 29. Eph. 5. 24. 2 King. 4. 9 , 22. * §. 23. Num. 30. 7. &c. b Vers . 13. c Num. 30. 3. Deut. 23. 21. Eccles . 5. 4. §. 34. a 45. E. 3. Fitz. Couen . 18. 1. H. 5. 12. b. Perk. cap. de Grant. Nat. Breu. fol. 120. G. b Nat. Breu. fol. 188. H. c Perk. fol. 2. a. d Perk. fol. 2. b. e 27. H. 8. 27. p. 12. f Perk. fol. 3. a. g 21. H. 7. 18. p. 29. Nat. Breu. fol. 120 G. h Ognels case , Coke Rep. 4. 3 ● 3. Deu. 12. i Plowd . Com 344. a. Bret and Rigdons case . 1. A mans estate may be wasted before he can tell how to redresse it . 2. Professors of contrarie religions may be sustained by the goods of the same family . 3. Iars would arise betwixt man and wife . Though she had a proprietie , yet hath she not thereupon libertie to dispose the goods . Licet vxor proprietatem habeat , administrationem tamen , & vsum . fructū bonorum viuente marito non habet . Greg. Sayr . clau . reg . lib. 9. cap. 16. * See Doctr. & stud . fol. 13. Perk. plito . 560. 26. H. 8. 7. p. 1. Plowd . comment . 418. b. a 12. H. 7. 22. Coke rep . 5. fo . 36. 28. H. 6. Dier fol. 6. plito . 5 Doct. & stud . fo . 13. Plowd . Comment . Bracebriges Case . b 4. H. 6. 31. c 18. E. 4. 11. p. 4 d See §. 26. Si quis abduxerit vxorem cum bonis familiae dicitur abducere vxorem cum bonis viri . Fitzherb . Nat. breutum fol. 89. Ut vinum temperatum licet maiori ex parte aquae constat , vinum appellamus : sic census quamuis plus contribuerit vxor , nuncupandus viri est . Plut. in praec . connub . Cor. 7. 4. a Treat . 4. §. 52. 54. b §. 21. c Treat . 4. §. 54. d §. 4. e §. 11. 2. Reason . Examples . 1 Sam. 25. 18. &c. Pro. 31. 11 , &c. 3. Reason . Wiues haue a like care in getting goods . 4. Reason . Wiues are yoak-fellowes with their husbands . * Treat . 4. §. 54. a § 22. b §. 21. c Treat . 4. §. 54. d Pro. 31. 20. State of question . Non excus●bit bona intentio vxoris , etiamsi ea acciperet ad eleemosynam faciendam . Greg. Sayr . clav . reg . lib. 9. cap. 16. a Luke 11. 41. b Gal. 6. 10. c Heb. 13. 16. d Luke 11. 41. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Date quae habetis eleemosynam Tertul. contr . Marcion . l. 4. 2 Cor. 8. 12. Numb . 30. 16. Exod. 4. 25. Factum Zephorae singulare est , & extraordinarium , neque constat illud simpliciter à Deo approbatum fuisse . Simler . in Exod. 4. Luke 8. 3. Matth. 1. 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Gen. 38. 8. Matth. 10. 3. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Chemnit . Harm . Euang. cap. 33. Ioh. 4. 53. Prou. 31. 11. * Treat . 4. §. 18. 52. Treat 4. §. 18. 1. Names . a Gen. 17. 19. b Luk. 1. 13. c Gen. 5. 3. d 29. e & 21. 3. f Gen. 35. 18. g Luk. 1. 62. h Mat. 1. 21. i Gen. 29. 32. k & 30. 24. l Gen. 27. 43 , &c. 2. Place and mariage . m Gen. 28. 1 , 2. n 1 Sam. 1. 11. 3. Calling . Vers 22. 4. Apparell . p 1 Sam. 2. 19. 5. Portions . Deut. 21. 15 , &c. * Treat . 4. §. 18. a Gen. 16. 5. b & 21. 10. c 2 King. 4. 22. 2 King. 4. 22. * Treat . 4. §. 18. 2 King. 4. 10. 2 King. 4. 22. Num. 30. 9. 1. Priuy purloyning husbands goods . a Si vxor ex bonis communibus si●e viri licentia saltem praesumpta accipiat , verè furtum commi●●it . Greg. Sayr . clau . reg . l. 9. c. 16. 2. Taking what allowance they list . 3. Ordering children against their husbands minde . 4. Ordering seruants against their husbands minde . 5. Lending forth their husbands cattell . 6. Feasting when their husbands shall not know it . Absente marito compotationes domi ne excita . Greg. Naz. ad Olymp. a Prou. 7. 19. 7. Gadding abroad at their owne pleasure . Noli pedem tuum limine crebro efferre . &c. Naz. loc . citat . b 1 Tim. 5. 13. c Tit. 2. 5. d Prou. 7. 11. e Judg. 19. 2. 8. Binding themselues without consent of husband . f 1 Sam. 1. 15. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 componitur ex diuersis vocibu● 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Petiui eum a Deo , I haue asked him of God. g 1 Sam. 1. 22. h Uers . 23. i 1 Sam. 2. 19. A wiues actiue obedience respecteth first her husbands commandement . Gen. 31. 16. * Treat . 4. §. 18. Gen. 31. 14. 1 Cor. 9. 5. Iam. 5. 17. 1 Cor. 7. 15. Contrary , when a wife makes her husband dwell where she will. 1 Pet. 3. 5 , 6. Iudg. 19. 2. * Treat . 4. §. 29. a Gen. 31. 4. b Esth . 1. 17. Contrary , stoutnesse in refusing to come . Es●h . 1. 16 , &c. Hebraei docent Vast●am natam fuisse ex Baltbasare rege Chaldaeorum . Feuard . in Esth . 1. Alij , ex Cyro . Merl. in Esth . Esth. 1. 17. * Pellican . Lauater . Gualt . Strigel . Cuper . Merlin . Feuard . Bellator . Rupert . Isiodor . Hisp . Raban . alijque Comment . in Esth . Gen. 20. 16. * Treat . §. 29. Gen. 18. 6. 1 King. 14. 2 , &c. Contrary , stubbornnesse in refusing to doe a thing vpon command . * Treat . 4. §. 34 , 35. A wiues actiue obedience to her husbands reproofe . The best triall of obedience . 1. She must meekly take reproofe . 1 Pet. 3. 4. Gen. 30. 1. Wisdome learned . Joh. 2. 4 , 5. Suadeo mulieribus vt viros etiam asperiores perserant . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1. Cor. 11. Excandescenti marito cede , & molli oratione iuva . Greg. Naz. ad Olymp. 1 Pet. 2. 19 , 20. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Rom. 12. 21. 2 Sam. 6. 20 , &c. Iob 2. 10. Prou 9. 7 , 8. * Treat . 4. §. 35. 2 She must redresse what is iustly reproued . a Gen. 31. 19. b & 35. 2 , 4. Contrary , to be worse for reprouing . Prou. 9. 8. Prou. 26. 12. * Treat . 4. §. 50 Job 2. 10. expounded . Discontent manifested . 1. By repenting their mariage . Non est sapientis dicere non putâram . Cic. Offic. lib. 1. 2. By impatient cariage . 3. By refusing to stoope . 4. By refusing to helpe . * Treat . 4. §. 26. Eph. 5. 22. Vers . 23. Vers . 24. * Treat . 1. §. 6. * See §. 4. of this Treat . 2. Cautions for limiting a wiues persisting to doe that which her husband forbids . Gen 3 16. Dan. 6. 7 , &c. Act. 4. 18 , &c. 1 Sam. 25. 18. Gen. 27. 6. Gen. 25. 23. 2. Cautions for limiting a wiues refusing to doe that which her husband commands . 1 Sam. 20. 31. 1 Sam. 22. 17. Deut. 13. 6. 1 Ki. 21. 7. &c. Gen. 12. 13. &c. Ephes . 5. 24. * See §. 5. of this Treatise . Cant. 2. 2. Foure graces needfull to season a wiues subiection . * Treat 4. §. 15. Phil. 2. 3. Ephes . 4. 2. * See before §. 4. Pro. 13. 10. * Treat . 4. §. 63. a Ephes . 6. 5. b Acts 1. 24. c Gen. 6. 9. d & 17. 1. e 1 Pet. 3. 5. f Gen. 18. 12. Reasons for sincerity . 1 Because wiues haue to doe with Christ . 2. This maketh a difference betwixt holy women and others , g 1 Pet. 3. 5. 3. Great is the benefit hereof . n Isa . 38. 3. i Psal . 45. 13. k Cant. 3. 1 , 2. 2 Sam. 6. 16. Pro. 30. 20. Pro. 2. 16. * Treat . 4. §. 65 , 74. 2 Cor. 9. 7. 1 Chro. 29. 9. Gen. 18. Psal . 110. 3. * Treat . 4. §. 72. 1 Sam. 4. 21. Matth. 16. 18. Contrary , 1. Intermission . 1 Sam. 19. 11 , &c. 2 Sam. 6. 16 , 20. 2. Apostasie . Pro. 2. 17. 2 Chron. 24. 2. Ezek. 18. 24. * Treat . 4. §. 26. Eph. 5. 21. & 22. Col. 3. 18. Acts 5. 29. * Treat . 4. §. 28 , 29. 1 Tim. 2. 11. Pro. 26. 16. * Treat . 4. §. 27. Si res aliqua occurrat , quae consilio opus habeat , quin ipsa quoque quid censeas di● as minimè prohibe● : sed viri tui sententiam vim maiorem semper obtinere volo . Gre● . Naz. ad Olymp. Acts 5. 9. See Treat . 2. Part. 1. §. 11. Tutū obsequium est , quoties qui dux est , ipse Dei Spiritu ducitur . 1. Reason . * §. 51. Ioh. 14. 9. Mat. 10. 40. Ioh. 5. 23. Luk. 10. 16. 1 Sam. 8. 7. 1 Pet. 2. 16. Rom. 13. 2. 2. Reason . 1 Cor. 11. 3. 1 Cor. 11. 14. 3. Reason . Subiection due to an husband as well as to Christ . Est . 1. 16. Christ will reward the good subiection , and reuenge the rebellion of wiues . 1 Sam. 2. 30. 4. Reason . Gen. 31. 14. Psal . 128. 3. A wiues subiection tendeth to her owne good . Gratitude requireth a wife to be subiect . 5. Reason . Notes for div A68107-e125290 Husbands bound to dutie . Propterea debent mulieribus suis ad virtutis exemplum se praebere , quia viri sunt . Aug. de adult . Coniug . l. 2. c. 8. a 1 Cor. 11. 7. Husbands particular duties . * Treat . 3. §. 2. 1. Husbands must loue their wiues . b Eph. 5. 25 , 28 , 33. c Gen. 24. 67. No dutie well performed without loue . 1 Cor. 16. 14. 2. A wife the most proper obiect of loue . Deut. 13. 6. 3. Loue keepes a man from abusing his authority . 4. Loue maketh him beare with her infirmities . 5. His loue draweth loue from her . How loue is an husbands particular dutie . 1 Cor. 13. 5. Loue a common condition to be annexed to euerie dutie . Contrary , 1. Hatred . Deut. 22. 13 , &c. Deut. 24. 3. Mat. 19. 8. 2. Want of loue . 1 Ioh. 4. 20. * Treat . 3. §. 9. Branches of loue . II. Husbands must maintaine their authoritie . 1 Pet. 3. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See Treat . 3. §. 3. Reasons . 1. Gods authoritie maintained by the husbands . 1 Cor. 11. 7. 2. The wiues good promoted thereby . It is in the mans power to maintaine his authoritie . 1 Tim. 4. 12. How a mans authority may be well maintained . Ad viros pertinet virtute vincere , & exemplo regere foemina● . Aug. de Adult . Coniug . lib. 2. cap. 8. Contrary , 1. base carriage 2. Cruell dealing . 3. Yeelding in vnlawfull things . a Dent. 13. 6 , 7. b 1 King. 21. 7 , 9. 1 King. 11. 4. Maximè obseruate vos atque attendite anim bus vestris ô viri ab vxoris concitationibus atque malis instigationibus , per hanc enim in vltimo supplantare Job visus est diabolus , &c. per istas etiam nunc plurimos subuertit . Orig. in Ioh. lib. 2. * Treat 3. §. 3. How a mans authority may be well managed . Husbands must account their wiues yoke-fellowes . 1 Pet. 3. 7. Gen. 2. 18. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Eph. 5. 28. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Treat . 3. §. 4. Rom. 8. 17. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1 Cor. 3. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Vxor & serua & domina est viri , Chrysost . in 1 Cor. 7. hom . 19. * Debet in vxorem vir dominari , vt animus in corpus , cōsentiens ei , & conspirans beneuolentia . Plut. praec . connub . Non es dominus sed maritus : non ancillam sortitus es , sed vxorem : gubernatorem ●e Deus voluit esse sexus inferioris , non praepotentem . Ambr. Hexaem . lib. 5. cap. 7. * Treat 3. §. 5. IIII. Husbands must account their owne wiues best for them . a Eph. 5. 25. b Ves . 28. Reason . Euery ones wife is prouided by God. c Pro. 19. 14. d & 18. 22. e Socrates interrogatus qua gratia vxoris mores toleraret , respondit , vt gymnasium & palaestram philosophiae domi habeam . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. f Ars tua Tiphy iacet si non sit in aequore fluctus Ouid. de Trist . l. 4. eleg . 3. * Treat . 3. §. 7. V. Husbands must intirely delight in their wiues . a Ezec. 24. 16. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 b Gen. 24. 67. Pro. 5. 18 , 19. expounded . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Col. 1. 13. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Nihil viro vxore bona amabilius . Hier. in Ezec. 24. Gen. 26. 8. * Treat . 3. §. 10. VI. Husbands must kindly accept euery good duty of his wife . Gen. 21. 8. 1 Sam. 1. 23. Contrary , 1. To take no notice of their wiues goodnesse . 2. Sleightly to passe it ouer . 1 Sam. 25. 21. 3. Scornfully to reiect it . Rom. 12. 21. Ephes . 6. 4. * Treat . 3. §. 11. 55. How a mans good acceptance of his wiues duty is manifested . 1. By answering reuerence with courtesie . Depone asperitatem morum cum tibi sedula vxor occurrit , &c. Ambr. Hexaem . lib. 5. cap. 7. Courtesie may stand with superiority . Gen. 23. 6 , 7. Gen. 33. 3 , 4. Esth . 5. 2. * Treat . 3. §. 15. 2. By granting her humble request . a Est . 5. 3. b 1 King. 1. 28. &c. c Gen. 28. 1. d & 16. 6. e & 21. 10. 11. * §. 5. * Treat . 3. § 38 , 39 , &c. & §. 43 44 , &c. 3. By accepting what she is willing to doe . 4. By forbearing to exact too much . 5. By suffering her to dwell where it is meetest for her . a Gen. 31. 4 , &c. 6. By forbearing to tire her with guests . 7. By suffering her to manage the affaires of the house . b 1 Sam. 1. 23. c Pro. 31. 11. d 1 Tim. 5. 14. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Materfamilias . What things are to be put to the wiues disposing . e Pro. 31. 21 , 22. f Uers . 15. g Gen. 16. 6. h 1 Tim. 5. 10. T it 2 4. 2 King. 4. 19. Cautions about referring matters of the house to the wiues ordering . i Pro. 31. 11. k Gen. 39. 6. Difference betwixt the trust put in a wife , and in others . In what things an husband manifesteth too much strictnesse . Gen. 2. 18. Pro. 20. 7. & 14. 8. & 20. 3. 1 Tim. 6. 4. Husbands must commend and reward good things in their wiues . a Rom. 13. 3. c Vers . 31. b Prou. 31. 28 , 29. * Lege apud T. Liv. Dec. 1. l. 1. quid inde evenit , quòd regij iuuenes suam quisque vxorem miris modis laudare . Quisque suam laudot , studijs certamina crescunt . Ouid. Fast . lib. 2. * Treat . 3. §. 10. Oportet virum praecsse vxori oblectando , & indulgendo . Plut. praec . Connub . 2 Tim. 2. 24. Col. 3 19. * Treat . 3. §. 13. 14. Wherein a husbands mildnesse is manifested . * Of his speech about her behinde her backe , See Treat . 2. Part. 2. §. 36. The speech of husbands to their wiues sweetned with mildnesse . 1. Mild and kinde titles . Contrary , vnseemely titles . Instruction to be giuen with meeknesse . 2 Tim. 2. 25. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Directions to instruct with meekenesse . Contrary , harshnesse . * Treat . 3. §. 43 , 51 , 52. 63 , 64. &c. Commandements to be ordered with mildnesse . What things he may command his wife . What things he may forbid his wife . Such things as a wife maketh doubt of , not to be pressed vpon her . Rom. 14. 23. Of what doubtfull things the commanding power of a gouernour may be a warrant . * Treat . 4. §. 66. How a wiues refusing to yeeld may be discerned to be on obstinacy or weakenesse . * Treat . 3. §. 43 , 44. &c. * Treat . 3. §. 28. Est . 1. 10. Reasons of pressing a cōmandement to be rendred . 1. Commanding must be rare . 2. Commanding must be by way of intreating . Philem. 9. Gen. 12. 13. * Treat . 3. §. 47. Husbands ought to reproue . a Pro. 15. 31. b & 6. 23. c Psal . 141. 5. See the fruits of reproofe , Treat . 3. §. 47. d Gen. 30. 2. e Iob 2. 10. f 2 Sam. 6. 21 , 22. Leuit. 19. 17. * Treat . 3. §. 47 An husbands reproofe must be sweetned with mildnes . * §. 44. Matter of reproofe . 1. Iust . Matth. 18. 15. 1 Tim 5. 19. 2. Weigh . y. m Gen. 30. 2. n Iob 2. 10. o 2 Sam. 6. 21 , 22. Contrary , 1. Credulitie . 2. Suspicion . 3. Rashnesse . Luk 4. 23. Mat. 7. 5. Rom. 2. 21. Rom. 2. 1. Gen. 38. 26. 2 Sam. 12. 13. Manner of reprouing . 1. Seldome . Contrary , continuall chiding . 2. Reproue mildly . Gal 6. 1. 3. Reproue in secret . Mat. 18. 15. Direction for reprouing such a wife as regardeth not a secret reproofe . Mat. 18. 15. Direction for reprouing a wife whose offence is publike . 4. Reproue gently . Pro. 25. 15. A reproofe may be sharpe not bitter . Gen. 30. 2. Iob 2. 10. 2 Sam. 6. 21 , 22. Rebuke neuer to be giuen by a man in passion . Mat. 6. 22. Rebuke to be put off while a wife is in passion . 1 Sam. 20. 30. 1 Sam. 20. 32. * Treat . 3. §. 10. An husbands cariage must be milde . 1. A milde countenance . Gen. 33. 10. Psal . 4. 6. Gen. 4. 6. Gen. 31. 2. Contrary . 1. A lofty brow . 2. A grim looke . 3. A frowning forehead . 4. A fiery eye . 2. Mild geslure . Obiect . Gen. 26. 8. Answ . 1 Sam. 1. 4 , 5. 1 Sam. 1. 4. Vipera virus ob venerationem nuptiarum euomit . Et tu duritiem animi , tuferitatem , tu crudelitatem ob vnionis reuerentiam non deponis ? Basil . Hexaem . hom . 7. Ambr. Hexaem . l. 5. c. 7. vrget hanc ipsam similitudinem . Huiusmodi virum ( siquidem vir appellandus est potius quàm fera ) & patricidae , & matricidae similem dixeris . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. An husband may not beat his wife . Reasons . 1. No warrant in the word . * §. 4. 2. Small disparity . Summa iniuria est vitae sociam , & in rebus necessarijs tibi coniunctam , taquàm mancipium ignominia affioere . Chrys . ibid. 3. Neere coniunction . a Eph. 5. 31. b 1 King. 18. 28. c Mar. 5. 5. Eph. 5. 30. Mat. 28. 18. 4. No profit : much mischiefe . Adhibitis verberibus morbus non tollitur , sed augetur , & exasperatur . Melch. Iun. quaest . Polit. par . 2. Nullum sit tam magnum peccatum , quod ad verberandum vxorem compellat . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. Sedefendendo . Gal. 6. 2. Considera mulierem debile vas esse : tu autem vir propterea princeps factus es , vt subditae feras imbecillitatem . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1. Cor. 11. 1. Pet. 3. 7. Directions to husbands for bearing with their wiues infirmities . Neque Saram tanquam sterilem contempsit Abraham : n●que quicquam tale exprobauit . Si vxor pauper sit , noli exprobare : & si stulta , noli ei insultare , Ibid. Uxor iracunda &c. admonenda & adiuvanda consilio , & omni conatu anniten . dum , vt illis liberetur affectibus , Ibid. 1 Sam. 1. 8. Gen. 21. 14. Prou. 19. 11. Eccl 7. 23. Gen. 30. 1. 2 , &c. Reason . Best tryall of a mans wisdome & loue . Matth. 5. 46. Luk. 6. 32 , 33. Eph. 5. 23. * Treat . 1. §. 15. & Treat . 3. §. 73. 1. Prouiding things needfull . 1 Pet. 3. 7. 1 Tim. 5. 17. 1 Tim. 5. 8. Recordare quòd pater vxoris tāquam depositum quoddam filiam tibi tradidit , & omnibus relictis , matre , domo , & seipso , omnem eius curā tuae dexterae commisit . Chrys . hō . 26. in 1. Cor. 11. Contrary , to take a wife only for himselfe . Pro. 18. 22. Priuate means of edification . Act. 10. 2 , 30. Iudg. 17. 10. 2 King. 4. 11. Publike meanes of edification . 1 Sam. 1. 7. & 2. 19. Luk. 2. 41. Ezek. 3. 18. &c. b Jsa . 4. 1. c Exo. 21. 10. * Treat . 2. Part. 2. §. 29. Treat . 3. §. 49. The paines of womens trauell . Psal . 48 6. Isa . 13. 8. & 21. 3 Ier. 4. 31. & 30. 6. Mic. 49. Gen. 35. 16 , &c. 1 Sam. 4. 19. 20. * See Treat 2. Part. 2. § 30. 39. Si quid vxor peccauerit consolare & noli moerorem augere . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. * Treat . 3. §. 38. 1 Sam. 1. 23. * §. 6. * Treat . 3. §. 23. 29. 33. Pro. 31. 15. &c. Vers . 21. Uers . 28. Vers . 20. Vers . 11. Uers . 28. 1 Pet. 3. 7. Eph 4. 8. Husbands before they die must make their will euen for their wiues good . 1 King. 1. 21. Husbands on their death-bed must commend their wiues to some faithfull friend . Iob. 19 26 , 27. Reason . Truest triall of loue at departure . Contrary . 1. A wilfull inability . 2 Making away their wiues ioynter , or any other right . 3. Defeating of thirds . Rom. 13. 5. 4. Making no will. Gen. 20 16. Ruth 3. 9. Ruth 2. 12. * Treat . 1. §. 15. and treat . 3. §. 73. 1 Sam. 27. 3. & 30. 18. A wife must be kept from being seduced . A wise stolne away must be fetched home . Iudg. 19. 2. 2 San. 3. 13 , 14. 1 Sam. 30. 18. A wiues credit must be maintained . See Treat . 2. Part 2. §. 31. &c. Luke 10. 16. A wife must be defended against strangers , seruants , and children . Est . 7. 7 , 8. &c. Licèt omnia proijcias , nihil molestius continget quàm non habere beneuolam domi vxorem : peccatum nullum magis dolendum inueneris , quàm cum vxore seditionem habere . Chrysost . hō . 26. in 1. Cor. 11. Genes . 16. 6. & 21. 14. Contrary , Dissolute carelesnesse . 1. In suffering seducers to come to the house . 2. In suffering wiues to goe whither they list . Luke 15. 4. 3. In not regarding ill reports of wiues . Pro. 12. 4. 4. In suffering wiues to be misused . Exod. 2. 13. 5. In boulstring vp children or seruants against wiues . Si illam quae secundum post te locum obtinet contumelia afficis , non parum tui principatus honori derogas . Chrys . loc . cit . The manner of an husbands loue set forth by Christs manner of louing his Church in six branches . 1. Christ first loueth the Church . 1 Joh. 4. 19. Cant. 1. 2. Husbands must by their loue prouoke their wiues to loue . Pro. 2. 17. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Sicaput est vir , praecedere debet in omnibus bonis factis vxorem suam , vt illa imitetur virum , & sequatur caput suum . Aug. de decem chor . c. 3. * Treat . 1. §. 10. Treat . 3. §. 57. 2. Christ loueth in truth . Vers . 26 , 27. Husbands must loue in deed . * 1 Ioh. 3. 18. * 1 Cor. 9. 5. 3. Christ loueth freely . Deut. 7. 7 , 8. Eph. 5. 27. Husbands loue must be free . 1 Cor. 13. 5. 1 Pet. 3. 7. 4. Christs loue pure . Eph. 5. 26 , 27. 1 Cor. 12. 12 , 13 Husbands loue must be chaste . Heb. 13. 4. * Treat . 2. part . 2. §. 5 , 8. Heb. 13. 4. 5 Christs loue extended to the giuing of himselfe a Ephes . 5 25. b Iohn . 10. 11. c & 15. 13. How husbands must loue their wiues more then themselues . 1 Iohn . 3. 16. Cautions about an husbands louing his wife more then himselfe . 2 Cor. 12. 15. * Treat . 3. §. 6. 6 Christs loue perpetuall . a Ioh. 13. 1. b Hos . 2. 19. Ier. 3. 1. 2 Sam. 7. 15. Husbands must be constant in their loue . See Treat . 1. §. 10. * Treat . 3. §. 59. Eph. 5. 28. To Christs example , the patterne of ones selfe is added . 1. Because it is more sensible . 2. Because it is more imitable . The patterne of louing ones selfe setteth forth the same things that Christs loue doth . 1 Cor. 2. 11. Man is tender towards himselfe . Eph. 5. 29. Husbands must deale tenderly with their wiues . Man is cheerefull in doing himselfe good . Leu. 19. 18. Husbands must be cheerefull in seeking their wiues good . Ruth 3. 11. Generall reasons . 1. Christs example . Christs example the greatest motiue that can be . * Treat . 3. §. 74. Two things in Christs patterne prouoke husbands to loue their wiues . 1. The great inequality betwixt Christ and his spouse . a Eph. 1. 21. b Phil. 2. 6. c Heb. 1. 3. d Iob. 1. 1 , 3. e Ezec. 16. 1. &c. f Isa . 40. 17. g Gal. 3. 28. h Mat. 22. 30. 2. The small benefit that Christ reapeth by louing his Church . i Iob 35. 7. k 1 Tim. 3. 16. l Phil. 2. 6 , 7. m 2 Cor. 8 9. n Reu. 1. 18. o Act. 3. 15. p Phil. 2. 8. q Gen. 2. 18. r Pro. 18. 22. * See Treat . 2. Part. 1. §. 27. Christs example remoueth all pretences which men make for not louing their wiues . 1. Obiect . 2. Obiect . 3. Obiect . 4. Obiect . 1. Cor. 13. 7. vers . 28. Notes for div A68107-e146950 Mat. 10. 37. Gen. 37. 2. Gen. 43. 7. Gen. 45. 9. Gen. 46. 29. Reasons . 1. Equitie . 2 Necessitie . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Rom. 1. 30. 2 Tim. 3. 3. * See Treat . 1. §. 4. a Exo. 20. 12. b Leu. 19. 3. c Num. 12. 14. d Gen. 27. 12. Reasons . 1. Feare ordereth loue . 2. It well guideth the carriage . Contrary , light and base esteeme of parents . c Gen. 9. 22. How to breed and cherish a filiall feare . Children ought to forbeare speaking in their parents presence Iob. 29. 9 , 10. Children must patiently hearken to their parents speech . Vers . 25. Gen. 49. 2. Pro. 1. 8 , & 4. 1. & 7. 1. Iam 1. 19. Contrary , 1. boldnesse of speech . 2. Impatient hearkening to parents . A childs reuerence in speech is manifested , 1. By reuerend titles . a Jer. 31. 9. Gal. 4. 6. * Matt. 23. 9. b 1 Sam. 24. 12. c 2 Kin. 5. 13. d Judg. 18. 19. e 2 King. 6. 21. f 1 Cor. 4. 15. g 1 Tim. 5. 1. h Gen. 22. 7. i & 27. 18. k 1 King. 2. 20. l Matt. 21. 30. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Gen. 31. 35. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 2. By few words . 3. By humble speech . m 1 Sam. 19 4. n & 24. 10. 4 By seasonable speech . o 1 Sam. 19. 6. p & 20. 30. 5. By ready answers . q 1 Sam. 3. 4 , 6 , r 18. s Mat. 21. 30. Contrary , 1. Scorning to acknowledge a parent . 1 King. 2. 20. 2. Too much importunitie . 3. Stout answers . Ne filius cum patre quoquo modo expostulet , cum lex interdixit , tum anteleges ipsa natura . Greg. Naz. in senten . Matt. 21. 29. Luke 15. 29. 4. Vnseasonable speech . Ephes . 6. 4. 5. Stomachfull silence . * §. 4. Direction for children how to speake of their parents . Iohn 8. 49. Prou. 30. 11. Childrens vnreuerend speeches of their parents . b Gen. 9. 22. c 2 Sam. 15. 3. d Prou. 30. 11. e Leu. 20. 9. f Pro. 30. 17. g Gen. 40. 19. Childrens reuerence to their parents manifested , 1. by meeting them . a Gen. 46. 29. 1 King. 2. 19. 2. By obeysance to them . c Gen. 48. 12. d 1 King. 2. 19. 3 By well composing the countenance . 4. By giuing the vpper hand . 5. By asking blessing . Gen. 27. 19. Gen. 48. 1. &c. Gen. 49. 1. &c. How the blessings which the patriarchs gaue their children are patterns to others . See Treat . 6. §. 58. Heb. 11. 20. Gen. 17. 7. Act. 2. 39. Iam. 5. 17. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 * See Treat . 6. §. 4. Prou. 15. 8. How wicked parents may blesse their children . Heb. 7. 7. It is lawfull for children to kneele to their parents . Gen. 48. 12. Mar. 10. 17. Vnreuerend gestures of children . 1. Rudenesse . 2. Statelinesse . 3. Boldnesse . 4. Ambition . 5. Refusing to aske blessing . Pro. 26. 16. Gen 27. 34. Heb. 12 17. a Eph. 6. 1. Col. 3. 20. b Matt. 21. 31. c 1 Pet. 1. 14. d Luk. 2. 5 1. e Pro. 23. 22. Disobedience most contrary to parents authoritie . f 2 Tim. 3. 2. g T it 1. 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . h Deut. 13. 13. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 ex non & profuit . Hier. absque iugo . quasi 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 i Deut. 21. 18 , &c. The parts of a childs obedience . Of the seuerall wayes whereby consent may be giuen , see Treat . 3. §. 19. Num. 30. 17. Iob 1. 12 , 19. Galat. 4. 1. Exod. 21. 7. Num. 30. 4. a Gen. 28. 2. b 1 Sam. 16. 11 , 19. c 1 Sam. 17. 17. d Jer. 35. 7. e Iustin . Mart. in Dial. cum Tryph. contr . Iud. f Erasm . paraphr . in Mar. 6. Bez annot . in Mar. 6. Basil . lib. de vit . solit . cap. 15. Theod. Eccl. hist . l. 3. 6. 23. Muscul . in Mat. 13. Danaeus schol . in Mar. 6. Gualt . hom . 46. in Mar. Muthes . in Mar. 6. alijque . Reasons . 1. Equitie . 2. Gods charge . Bellarm. de Mon. lib. 2. cap. 36. Licet filijs ingredi religionem inuitis parentibus . Conditio est , vt parentes non sint in tali necessitate , vt sine siliorum auxilio viuere non possint . Tunc enim tenentur ex praecepto Dei parentibus adesse . Bellarm. loc . cit . Eos iuvant quomodo religiosos decet , nimirum precibus apud Deum . Bellarm. ibid. Gen. 12. 1. Deut. 33. 9. Psal . 45. 10. Mat. 10. 37. Luk. 9. 60. Gen. 12. 1. Exo. 32. 26 , &c. Exo. 32. 27. Mat. 15. 6. * Psal . 45. 10. * Gen. 2. 24. Luk. 15. 12 , &c. Gen. 37. 35. Arguments to proue that children may not marie without parents consent . Non est virginalis pudoris eligere maritum : electionem mariti parentibus deferat . Ambr. de Patr. l. 1. c. 9. Legitimum non est coniugium nisi vxor petatur a parentibus . Euarist . in epist . ad eccles . Affric . a Filij sine consensu parentum ritè & iure nubere nō possunt . Tertul. ad vxor . l. 2. b Tempore creuit amor : tedae quoque iure coissent : Sed vetuere patres . Ouid. Metam . 4. Me parenti potius quàm amori obsequi oportet . Teren. in Hecyra . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Eurip. in Androm . c Concil . Trid. decr . de reform . matr . c. 1. d Matris voluntatem in tradenda filia omnibus natura praeponit . August . epist . 233. e Cum sponsus & sponsa benedicendi sunt a sacerdote , offerantur ecclesiae a parentibus . Grat. 30. quast . 5. Cau. Quod ipsi Philosophi mirati sant , seruate virgines . Ambr. de patr . l. 1. c. 9. f Erasm . in colloq . de Matrim . Luth. in serm . de Matrim . Bucer . in Mat. 19. Calu. Instit . l. 4. c. 19. §. 37. Bez. de Diuort . Zanch. de Oper. Dei par . 3. l. 4. c. 1. Chemn . in Exam. part . 2. Brent . in Catec . Melanc . loc . de coniug . Perkins in Oecon. c. 6. alij● . Hoc fieri debere & ciuilis & naturalis ratio suadet . Iustin . Instit . l. 1. tit . 10. Digest . l. 23. tit . 2 The reasons alleadged §. * Gen. 2. 24. 12. may be applied to this particular . Whether parents may force their children to marry , or no. See Treat . 6. §. 54. Prou. 21. 1. Iudg. 14. 2. Qui liberos iniuria prohibuerint ducere vx ere 's vel nubere , per praesides cogantur in matrimonium collocare Di est . lib. 23. tit . 2. § 19. Gen. 6. 2. Gen. 26. 35. See more mischiefes following such mariages , §. 21. Gen. 28. 2. Gen. 32. 22. * See Treat . 8. §. 17. * See the third reason in §. 17. * See the second reason in §. 17. Psal . 127. 3. * §. 19. * Anno 4. & 5. Phil. & Mar. stat . 8. Mischiefes arising from marriages without parents consent . * Causa mali tanti coniux . Virg. Aeneid . 6. Qui rapta longum cum coniuge bellum Attulit in patriam . Ouid. Met. l. 12. lege . Hor. Carm. l. 1. Od. 15. * §. 19. a Gen. 32. 10. b Gen. 31. 36. Reasons . 1. Children vnder parents are as seruants . Gal. 4. 1. 2. Good of parents . 3. Good of children . 2 Cor. 12. 14. It is a sinne for children . 1. To mutter at their parents allowance . 2. Priuily to purloine their parents goods . Gen. 31. 19. Who counsell children to conuey away parents goods are accessary to theft . Pro. 20. 17. 3. Wastfully to spend . Luk. 15. 13. 4. To defeat their parents of their goods cunningly . 2 Sam. 15. 10. &c. 1 King. 1. 5. &c. Gen. 37. 3. 2 Sam. 13. 18. Gen. 27. 15. Childrens sin in apparelling themselues to the griefe , and disgrace of their parents . Zeph. 1. 8. Num. 30. 4. Vnlawfull vowes of children . * §. 14. a Psal . 34. 14. b Gen. 26. 34 , 35. c Gen. 28. 2. & 29. 18. d Ephes . 6. 1. A childe must come at the parents call . b 1 Sam. 3. 5 , &c. c & 16. 12. d Gen. 49. 1. A childe must goe at his parents word . * §. 27. e Gen. 28. 5. f & 37. 14. g & 42. 2 , 3. h 1 Sam. 17. 17 , i 20. A childe at command must attend vpon the parent . Gen. 22. 6. A child must do the message his parent will haue him doe . d Gen. 50. 5. e Ier. 35. 8. f 1 Sam. 17. 20. 1 Sam. 17. 20. vers . 34. a Prou. 22. 13. b & 10. 26. c Matt. 21. 30. 1 Sam. 16. 13 , 21. & 17. 15. Exo. 2. 16 , 17. a Pro. 1. 8. 9. & 4. 1. b Pro. 4. 3. c Exo. 18. 24. Reasons . 1. Parents ought to instruct . * Treat . 6. §. 26 , &c. 2. Children get much wisdome thereby . d Prou. 13. 1. e Prou. 1. 9. & 4. 9. 3. Much ioy is brought to parents . f Prou. 10. 1. g Prou. 27. 11. h Gen. 26. 35. i 1 Sam. 2. 25. k Gen. 19. 14. * Treat . 3. §. 47 , &c. The reasons alledged , and the directions giuen concerning a wiues subiection to her husbands reproofe , may fitly be applied to this part of childrens obedience . Here therefore the same order is obserued , and the seuerall points confirmed by proofes pertinent to children . Num. 12. 14. Gen. 37. 10. 1 Sam. 20. 30 , &c. Reason . Wisdome learned . See. §. 6. Luk. 2. 49. See Treat . 3. §. 48. Exo. 18. 17. 1 Sam. 2. 25. Pro. 13. 1. Pro. 3. 34. a Heb. 12. 9. b Pro. 29. 17. c Gen. 26. 35. Direction for well vsing correction . d Pro. 13. 24. c & 22. 15. Deut. 21. 18. &c a 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Eph. 6. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Treat . 3. §. 63 , 64 , &c. The extent of childrens obedience . Gen. 22. 6 , 7. * §. 13. 14. &c. Reason . Childrens ouer-weining conceit of their owne iudgement aboue their parents , causeth much mischiefe . a Gen. 27. 6. &c. b Gen. 43. 3. c Vers . 11. A fault for children to be too peremptory - against their parents command . f Gen. 43. 5. Heb. 12. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Ephes . 6. 1. Col. 3. 20. See the two paire of cautions annexed to like limitations of a wiues obedience , Treat . 3. §. 51. & 52. and apply them to these limitations of childrens obedience . 1 Sam. 19. 11. &c. Notes for div A68107-e161480 e Gen. 2. 24. & 3. 16. 1 Sam. 20. 31 , 32. 2 Chr. 29. 3. &c. Dan. 6. 10. Notes for div A68107-e161940 1. Eie seruice . 2. Fearefulnesse . a ½ Kin. 22. 52. b 2 Chr. 22. 4. c Matt. 10. 37. d Luke 14. 26. Motiues to prouoke children to prefer God before their parents . e Heb. 12. 9. f Luk. 12. 4 , 5. Notes for div A68107-e162190 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Arist . Ethic. l. 8. c. 14. 1 Tim. 5. 4. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . It is monstrous ingratitude for children to neglect their parents . Notes for div A68107-e162420 A rule of recompence . Ultra posse non est esse . a Gen. 9. 21. b & 19. 33. b & 19. 33. c 2 Sam. 11. 4. d Gen. 12. 13. e & 26. 7. f & 37. 34 , 35. g 2 Sam. 18. 33. Notes for div A68107-e163040 a Gen. 27. 12. b & 28. 5. c & 37. 10. d 1 Sam. 31. 2. Luk. 2. 51. A childe may not dispise a parent for any infirmity . 2 Sam. 15. 3. Pro. 30. 17. Notes for div A68107-e163390 1 Pet. 4. 8. Gen. 9. 23. A Sinne for a childe to discouer a parents infirmity . Gen. 9. 22. Vers . 25. Parent is imprecatione nihil perniciosius excogitari potest . Plato de Leg. lib. 11. More then monstrous for a childe to raise a slander of a parent . Notes for div A68107-e163700 2 Sam. 15. 3. Gen 27. 1. Ruth 1 , 16 , 21. Vnnaturall to despise a parent for any casuall infirmitie . Leu. 19. 14. Notes for div A68107-e163900 a Gen. 48. 1. b & 37. 35. c & 42. 8. d & 47. 12. e Ruth 2. 18. f 1 Sam. 22. 3 , 4. Vetustissima lex erat inscripta mentibus omnium , vt liberi si hoc officij grauentur impendere quod pulli ciconiarum reponunt suis parentibus , velut impij conijciantur in vincula . Erasm . Instit . Matrim . g Iohn 19. 27. h 1 Tim. 5. 4. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Arist . Plin. Suidas . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Sin of Pharisies in freeing children from relieuing their parents . i Mar. 7. 11. k vers . 13. * See §. 14. 1. Sin of children in denying releefe to parents . l 1 Ioh. 3. 17. Iniquissimum est patrē egere , cùm filius sit in facultatibus . Digest . lib. 25. tit . 3. §. 5. m Luk. 16. 19. 2. In bringing parents into extremities . n Gen. 37. 34. 3. In striking parents . o Exod. 21. 15. 4. In murthering parents . p Solon cùm interrogaretur , cur nullum supplicium constituisset . in eum qui parentem necasset , respondit , se id neminem facturum putasse . Cic. pro Ros . Amer. q Si quis parentus fata propera uerit , neque gladio , neque ignibus , neque vlli alij solenni poenae subiugetur , sed insutus culeo cum cane , & gallo gallinaceo , & vipera , & simia , vel in vicinū mare , vel in amnem proijciatur , &c. Justin . Cod. l. 9. tit . 17. Cur voluerint parricidas insui in culeum viuos , atque ita in flumen deijci , docet Cicero pro Ros . Amer. Ad famam filij attinet , vt videatur honorem debitum patri defuncto praestitisse . Cic. Philip. 9. Notes for div A68107-e164690 Buriall a meanes to maintaine hope of resurrection . Constituere pyras : huc corpora quisque su●rum More tulere ●a●rum , subiect siue ignibus , &c. Virg. Aeneid . 11. a Gen. 25. 9. b & 35. 29. c & 50. 7. 1. Reason . d 1 King. 14. 13. 2 King. 22. 20. 2. Reason . f Ier. 22. 19. 1 King. 21. 23 , 24. Psal 79. 3. g 2 Sam. 2. 5. 3. Reason . Sinne of children to neglect their parents dead corps . Sinne of children entring vpon their parents estate before they are dead . 1 King. 1. 5. Sinne of children disturbing their parents funerall . Gen. 27. 41. Notes for div A68107-e165390 Gen. 50. 7. Contrary , 1. Too sumptuous funerals . Act. 8. 2. 2. Too base funeralls . Notes for div A68107-e165580 Childrens respect to the credit of their deceased parents . Psal . 37. 21. Notes for div A68107-e165700 §. 7. Mat. 7. 2. Quaecunque parentibus stipendia intuleris , eadem ipse a filiis expecta . Thal. Miles . apud Di●g . Laert. l. 1. Notes for div A68107-e165830 1 King. 3. 3. 2 King. 22. 2. 1 King. 15. 11. Nullum monumentum clarius relinquere potuit , quàm effigiem morum suorum , virtutis , constantiae , pietatis filium . Cic. Philip. 9. 1 King. 12. 16. 1 King. 15. 26. Notes for div A68107-e166160 Bellar. Tom. 2. Contr. 3. De Purgator . l. 2. c. 16. &c. * In whole armour of God Treat . 3. §. 39. 40. in Ephes . 6. 18. Notes for div A68107-e166360 Seneca in Agamē . Poetae tradiderunt filios patris vlciscendi causa supplicium de matre sumpsisse , idque deorum iussis , atque oraculis fecisse . Cic. pro. Sex. Ros . b Rom. 12. 17 , c 19. Mat. 5. 39. d 1 King. 2. 5. 8. e 2 Sam. 3. 39. & 19. 23. Notes for div A68107-e166740 * § 37. How children obey their parents in the Lord. 1. By obeying for the Lords sake . Rom. 13. 5. 1 Pet. 2. 13. Col. 3. 20. 2 In sincerity . Col. 3. 23. 3. With cheerefulnesse . 2 Cor. 9. 7. 4 With reuetence . * §. 3. 5. In the feare of God. * §. 37. & 38. 6. With perseverance . Notes for div A68107-e167150 Faults in the manner of doing duty . 1. By-respects . 2. Complementall . 3. Rudely . 4. Grudgingly . * §. 38. 5. Onely to please man. 6. Vnsetledly . Notes for div A68107-e167350 Gen. 28. 7. Reasons . Both parents to be of like account with children . Direction for a childe when one parent commandeth one thing , the other another . Notes for div A68107-e167710 Familiaritas parit contemptum . Teren. in Andr. * §. 2 , 3. * §. 54. Leu. 19. 3. Notes for div A68107-e168060 De necessitate . De honestate . * See §. 16. Phil. 4. 8. Notes for div A68107-e168300 Exo. 18. 7. Ruth . 1. & 2. Luk. 2. 51. 1. Reason . Leu. 18. 8 , 17. 2. Reason . 1 Pet. 2. 18. Rom. 12. 21. Mic. 7. 6. Notes for div A68107-e168890 Galat. 4. 2. Esth . 2. 20. 2 Kin. 2. 15 , &c. & 6. 1. 2 King. 2. 12. * Treat 6. §. 74 , &c. Notes for div A68107-e169190 * ● . 37. * §. 52. Liberis suis pater Dei vice est . Greg. Naz. ad Vitit . * See §. 5. Rom. 13. 2. Notes for div A68107-e169530 Right implieth three things . 1. It is agreeable to all law . 2. It is due by vertue of parents place . 3. It is a debt . Notes for div A68107-e169890 Coloss . 3. 20. b 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 1 Tim. 5. 4. c 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Gen. 31. 7 , &c. vers 42. 1 Sam. 2. 34. 2 Sam. 18. 9. 1 King. 2. 25. Notes for div A68107-e170320 Childrens obedience to parents is , 1. No arbitrary thing . 2. An eternall law , and generall to all children . a Gen. 47. 12. & 48. 12. & 50. 5. b 1 King. 2. 19. 3. Indispensable . Exo. 20. 1. Notes for div A68107-e170860 Mat. 22. 39. Notes for div A68107-e171030 Promise of reward a great motiue . How Gods promise is a stronger motiue then any mans . How Gods promise commendeth Gods loue . Isa . 5. 3 , 4. Notes for div A68107-e171280 a Tit. 2. 4. b Gen. 22. 2. c & 25. 28. d Ibid. As I haue heretofore laid downe Loue a fountaine of wiues , husbands , and childrens duties ; so must I continue my course , and set it forth as the fountaine of parents duties . For the Scripture hath noted it as a dutie belonging to all and euery of them : and therefore I might not omit it in any of them . Yet let not any thereupon thinke , that the same point is oft handled , and repeated againe and againe . For according to the seuerall parties , and the seuerall relation they haue to others , there are seuerall fruits of loue : euen as the same moisture of the earth causeth seuerall and diuers fruits , according to the seuerall kindes of plants that receiue that moisture . Compare the seuerall places , where this generall duty of loue hath beene handled , and you will finde the manner of handling to be different , and to afford new matter . Want of naturall affection in parents . a Rom. 1. 30. Tit. 3. 3. b 2 King. 16. 3. & 21. 6. Ezek. 16. 20. c Leu. 18. 21. d & 20. 2. * Purc . Pilgr . in Americ . cap. 7. & cap. 11. Haters of children for piety . Doting on children . 1 Thes 5. 17. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Praier a peculiar dutie of parents . b Gen. 17. 7. c Deut. 5. 29. d Act. 2. 39. Treat 5. §. 9. e Gen. 25. 21. f 1 Sam. 1. 10. Paulam antè votis quàm vtero concepisti . Hier. ad 1 aet . e Gen. 25. 21. g Gen. 25. 22. h Luk. 1. 64. i Iob. 1. 5. k Gen. 27. 4. Parents neglect of praier . Parents imprecations against children . a Psal . 1. 12. 2. b Pro. 20. 7. c & 13. 22. d Deut. 5. 29. e Ezec. 18. 20. Hab. 2. 4. g Gen. 4. 11. h & 9. 25. i 2 Sam. 18. 15. k 1 Sam. 2. 30. l 2 Chr. 28. 27. m 2 Sam. 13. 14 , 29. Relinque bonam filijs memoriam magis quàm diuitias multas . Bas serm . in Scrip. loc . a Pro. 23. 5. b Tro. 10. 22. c Hos . 13. 11. Ne liberos praetexas . Qui enim filium fecit , & te fecit : qui etiam tibi occasiones nutriend praebet , & filio praebebit vitae subsidia . Basil . loc . ●it . How farre parents prouidence extendeth it selfe . * Grauidae corpora curare debent . Mens item earum quietem desiderat . Quae enim procreantur à matre in cuius aluo continentur , alimentum capiunt , vt à terra ea-quae gignantur ex ea . Arist . Pol. lib. 7. a Iudg. 13. 4. Iudg. 13. 11 , &c. Contrary . 1. To miscarry through negligence . 2. To make away a childe in the wombe . Omne quod formatam animam à Deo accepit vindie abitur si iniuslè interimatur . Constit . Apost . l. 7. c. 4. Iniquiffima volucris Aquila dicitur , quiae taedio nutriendi pullum quem genuit , ipsa fugat . Tales parentes ij sunt , qui liberos suos infantes exponunt . Basil . Hexam . hom . 8. Necare videtur qui partum abijcit , & qui publicis locis misericordiae causa , quam ipse non habet , exponit . Digest . l , 25. tit . 3. §. 4. 1 Pet. 2. 2. Postquam ablactaueris cam , &c. dixit Hier. ad Laetam de filia sua . Gen. 49. 25. Ose . 9. 14. Exo. 2. 7 , &c. 1. Tim. 5. 10. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Tit. 2. 4. Gen. 21. 7. m 1 Sam. 1. 22. n Psal . 22. 9. o 1 King. 3. 21. Gen. 21. 7. Psal . 22. 9. Cant. 8. 1. Luk. 11. 27. Ipsa suggerit natura matribus ipsis lactandos esse suos foetus . Idoirco enim animanti enixae lactis alimentum omni praebuit ▪ Sapiens verò etiam prouidentia mammas foeminis binas effinxit , &c. Plut. de Justit . lib. In ijs animantibus quae lacte aluntur , omnis ferè cibus lactescere incipit . Cic. de Nat. D. Mater Bernardi liberos suos alienis vberibus nutriendos committere refugiebat , quasi cum lacte materno materni quodammodo boni infundens eis naturam . Guil. Abb. de vit . Bern. l. 1. c. 1. Lam. 4. 3. Matres maiore studio & cura nutrient , nempe ex ipsis visceribus diligunt liberos suos . Cum nutrices vtpote quae mercedem ament , charitatem praebeant subditiciam . Plut. de Instit . lib. Arist . Oecon. l. 2. c. 3. Plutarch . loc . citat . A. Gellius Noct. Attic. comment . li. 12. cap. 1. Gen. 24. 59. 2 Sam. 4. 4. 2 King. 11. 2. Gen. 35. 8. Ruth 4. 16. & 1. 12. Exod. 2. 7. Num. 11. 12. 1 Thes . 2. 7. Luke 16. 1. &c. Reu. 15. 16. Hos . 6. 6. Matt. 9. 13. 1 Sam. 1. 23. Gen. 21. 8. Veraciter conijcere possumus quid valeat in parvulis baptismi sacramentum ex circumcisione , &c. Aug. de Bap. l. 5. c. 24. Gen. 21. 4. Luk. 1. 59. & 2. 21. Ios . 5. 5. Mat. 12. 7. Act. 16. 15 , 33. Mat. 19. 13. Gen. 17. 7. Act. 2. 39. Mat. 19. 14. Psal . 51. 5. Consuetude matris Ecclesiae in baptizandis paruulis nequaquam spernenda est . Aug. de Gen. l. 10. c. 23. Matth. 28. 19. Ioh. 3. 5. In Patrem , & in Filium , & in Spiritū Sanctū baptizamur , vt Trinitatis vnū appareat sacramentum : sed in vno nomine quod intelligitur Deu● . Hier. in Eph. 4. Parents must giue the childs name . a Gen. 17. 19. Matth. 1. 21. Luk. 1. 13. c Luk. 1. 59. & 2. 21. Why the name is giuen at baptisme . Fit names to be giuen . Luk. 1. 59 , &c. Read the rubrick before the forme of administring Baptisme in our Common Prayer booke . Christianorum filij si baptisma non receperint , scelus refertur ad eos qui dare noluerint : maxime eo tempore quo contradicere non pote rant qui accepturi erant . Hier. ad Laet. Seleuciani baptismum in aqua non accipiunt . Aug. de Haer. 59. Chemnit . harm . Euang. cap. 16. Sine mysterio Trinitatis quicquid in vnam aut alteram personam accipitur imperfectum est . Hier. in Ioel. 2. Act. 2. 38. & 10. 48. & 19. 5. Lasciua nomina paruulis baptizandis imponenda non sant . Ioh. de Bur. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . In prole attenditur vt amanter suscipiatur , benignè nutriatur , religiosè educetur . Aug. de Gen. ad lit . l. 9. c. 7. Refectionis tempus , & mensura , & qualit as pueris competenter discernantur . Basil . Ascet . c. 15. a 1 King. 14. 2. b Ioh. 4. 47. 1 Tim. 5. 8. 1. Contrary , Couetousnesse Non est boni parentis qucm procrearit , & eduxerit , cum non & vestire & ornare . Cic. de Orat. Nonne ipsae ferae foetus suos arctissimè amant ? Nihilne fando de pardis , apris , boumque armentis audijsti , quanto cum tremore eorum saluti consulant ? Greg. Naz. ad Ueial . Pro. 27. 7. Si parentum incuria filij in intemperantiam labentur , genitores rei animarum illarum fient . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 11. I. The kinds of nurture . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See Treat . 1. §. 110. b Pro. 22. 6. c Leu. 19. 32. Pro. 25. 6. Luke 14. 8. d Gen. 23. 7. & 43. 33. Iob 32. 4 , 6. e Iob 30. 1 , 12. Luke 14. 7. 1. Cor. 14. 40. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Rom 13. 13. 1 Thes . 4. 12. Phil. 4. 8. 1 King. 10. 5. Gen. 43. 33. 1 Pet. 3. 1. 1 Thes . 4. 12. Matt. 23. 23. 1 Cor. 14. 33. Admonition to Schoolemasters . Pro 22. 6. a Gen. 4. 2. b Gen. 37. 12. c Gen. 29. 9. d Exo. 2. 16. e 1 Sam. 16. 7. Benefits of a good calling . Psal . 91. 11. Directions for choise of callings . 1. Generall principles are to be taught . Non sunt contemnenda quasi parua , sine quibus magna constare non possunt . Hier. ad Laet. 2. The calling must be lawfull . 3. The calling must be fit for the childes ability . 4. The best callings must be preferred . 1 Cor. 12. 31. Children to be trained vp to the ministery . Mat. 12. 44. Solon legibus cauisse legitur , vt filius , quem parentes nullam artem docuissent , non cogeretur illos alere senio confectos , aut ad inopiam redactos . Eras . Instit . Matrim . Phoenices Veneri donum dabant de prostitatione filiarum , antequam iungerent eas viris . Aug de Ciu. D. l. 4 c. 10. vide Lud. Uiu . in hunc loc . Recte dicuntur parentes filios daemoniorum sacrilegijs obligare conantes , spir taliter homicidae . Aug. Epist . 23. Infans tibi est ? ab infantia sanctitate imbuatur : abipsis vnguiculis Spiritui consecre tur . Greg. Naz. Orat. 40. in S. Bapt. Lege Hier. Epist . ad Laet. b Deut. 4. 9. & 6. 7 & 11. 19. Psal . 78. 5 , 6. c Exo. 12 26. & 13. 14. d Ios 4. 6 , 7 , 21. e Deul . 6. 20. f Gen. 18. 19. g Pro. 4 4. h & 31. 1. i 2 Tim. 1. 5. Reasons . 1. Benefit of pietie . 2. Necessitie of pietie . Fiunt non nascuntur Christiani . Hier. ad Laet. 3. Charge of parents . k 1 Sam. 3. 13. Why Parents as well as Ministers are bour●d to teach pietie . 4. Equitie . p Psal . 51. 5. q Ezec. 16. 20 , 21. 5. Gods children . 6. Cause of obedience . 7. Comfort of parents on their death-bed . 8. Propagation of pietie . 1. Principles of pietie to be all taken out of Gods word . 2 Tim. 1. 13. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Mat. 7. 9 , 10 , 11. 2. Let children at first read the Scripture . Sacrae Scripturae nominibus vtantur , & loco fabularum selectae illis historiae narrentur , & sententijs prouerbialibus ex Solomone instituantur . Basil . Ascet . c. 15. 3 Catechise children daily . Deut. 6. 7. Isa . 28. 10. 4. Take all occasions from sensible things to make a spirituall vse . Deut. 6. 7. 5. Open the mysteries of the rites of the Church . Exo. 12. 26. & 13. 14. 6. Let Gods great workes be declared . Jos . 4. 6 , 21. 7. Let religious masters be chosen . 1 Sam. 1. 25. Magister probae aetatis , & vitae , atque eruditionis est eligendus . Hier. ad Laet. 8. Be an example . a Ios . 24. 15. b Psal . 101. 2. Nihil in te & in Patre suo videat , quod si fecerit peccet . Mementote vos parentes virginis , magis eam exemplis doceri posse , quàm voce . Hier. ad Laet. Iob non tantum pro corpore filiorum sollicitus erat , sed plus de anima cogitabat . Orig. in Iob. lib. 1. Alexander & in moribus , & in incessu l. eonidis paedagogi sui non potuit carere vitijs , quibus adbuc paruulus fuit infectus . Hier. ad Laet. Parentes non educant filios in eruditione domini quia solliciti non sunt pro salute vel perditione eorum . Orig. loc . citat . II. The Time of nurture . Nurture must be begun betimes . b Pro. 22. 6. c & 13. 24. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 maneinde in Picl 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 mane facere , id est , mature . d 2 Tim. 3. 15. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Puer recens natus . Reasons . 1. Euils preuented . e Gen. 8. 21. f Pro. 22. 15. 2. Continuance in euill maketh inflexible . 1 Sam. 2. 25. 3. Young children most pliable . 4. What first learned best remembred . Prou. 22. 6. Quo sem●lest imbuta recens seruabit od●rem Testa diu . Hor. Si liberis ab ipsis statim initijs leges optimas imponamus , minimum posthac laborabimus . Consuetudo ipsa virtutis in legem transiet . Chrys . in 1. Tim. Hom. 9. Obsequentes facite filios vestros ab infantia , attendentes ne in vos potestantem habeant praeter vestram sententiam . Constit . Apost . l. 7. c. 4. b Compare 2 Tim. 1. 5. with 3. 15. c Prou. 31. 1. d & 1. 8. & 6. 20. e Prou. 29. 15. f 1 King. 15. 2 , 10. 2 Chro. 22. 3. 2 King. 4. 19. * §. 37. 1 King. 1. 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * Treat . 5. §. 62. 1 Sam. 2. 25. Iob 1. 5. Hoc faciebat ille beatus vir , non semel , aut secundo , neque vno anno , aut duobus , sed sic faciebat Iob omnibus diebus vitae eorum . Orig. in Iob lib. 1. Direction . Aegrè reprendas quod sinis consuescere . Hier. ad Laet. 2 Sam. 15. 1. III. The means of nurture . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See Treat . 1. §. 120. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See Treat . 1. §. 119. Annuncia , praecipe , impera , suade eis , &c. Aug. de salut . docum . cap. 29. Eccl. 12. 11. e Heb. 13. 9. f 2 Tim. 4. 2. g Deut. 6. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Acuit . in Piel acuit valde , vel frequenter . Metaphora ducta à gladio , qui dum acuitur saepius impellitur ad cotem . Vatab. in annot . in hunc loc . vide Treat . 1. §. 120. h Pro. 1. 8. i & 2. 1 , 2. Direction . Gal. 6. 9. b Pro. 17. 10. c Pro. 6. 23. d & 15. 32. e & 15. 5. f & 24. 25. g Gen. 9. 25. & 34. 30. & 49. 4. h 1 Sam. 2. 23. Eli dum filijs molestus esse seuera increpatione recusat , & illos & seipsum ●na perdidit , Chrys . in 1 Tim. hom . 9. 1 King. 1. 6. Omnia quae deliquerint filij , de parentibus requiruntur qui non erudierint silios suos . Orig. in Iob. lib. 1. b Pro. 19. 18. c & 29. 17. d & 23. 13. e Vers . 14. Gen. 22. 2 , 3. Heb. 12. 6 , 8. h Pro. 3. 12. i Heb. 12. 9. Reasons to moue parents to correct . 1. Benefits of correction to the parties corrected . k Pro. 22. 15. l & 20. 30. m Pro. 23. 13. n Vers . 14. Heb. 12. 11. Pro. 29. 15. q Matt. 7. 24. 2. Benefits of correcting to him that correcteth . r Pro. 17. 25. ſ & 22. 15. t Sam. 3. 13. u Pro. 29. 17. Three things noted in the matter , for which correction is to be giuen . Heb. 12. 10. Gen. 3. 11 , &c. Foure general rules for the manner of correcting . 1 Cor. 16. 14. Reu. 3. 19. Nunquam , iratus qui accedit ad poenam , mediocritatem tenebit , Cic. Offic. lib. 1. Ier. 10. 11. Foure particular rules for the manner of correcting . b Reu. 3. 19. Vt ad vrendum & secandum medici , sic nos ad castigandū , rarò , inuitique veniamus , nec vnquam nisi necessario , sinulla reperietur alia medicina . Cic. Offic. lib. 1. Cauendum ne maior poena , quàm culpa sit . Cic. loc . citat . Qui non corripiunt filios suos , & eorum animas igni inextinguibili in interitum tradunt , & semetipsos in furorem iudicij dem●rgunt . Orig. in Iob. lib. 1. 1 Sam. 2. 29. * §. 46. Patres non oportet asperos esse circa filios . Cyp. Testim . l. 3. c. 71. Uerendum ne , si parentes ob quaevis errata filios coarguant , frontem tandem ipsi perfricent . Greg. Naz. ad Vital . Multa quae vident parentes videre se dissimulent ; multa se minime audisse fingant quae auribus infixa habent . Greg. Naz. ad Vital . * §. 31. Fit callings to be prouided . a Gen. 4. 2. b & 25. 27. c 1 Sam. 8. 1. d 1 Sam. 17. 13. e & . 16. 11. The benefits of a fit calling . Cautions in prouiding callings . Exod. 35. 35. 1 King. 5. 6. Gen. 47. 6. Ier. 17. 16. 1. Extreme in the defect . * Imitari noli crudelitatem earum auium quibus vngues aduncisunt : hi cùm suos senserint foetus volandi iom potestatem consequutos esse , alis eos verberantes ac impingentes nidis pellunt , nullamque prorsus erga illos extrusos curam d●inceps adhibent . Basil . Hexam . hom . 8. 2. Extreme in excesse . 1. Vnfit caling . 2. Vndue entrance . What is to be done after one is vnlawfully setled in a fit calling . Date operam vt cùm ad adultā aetatem filij peruenerint matrimenio iungantur . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 11. lege Chrys . in 1. Tim. hom . 9. b Ier. 29. 6. c 1 Cor. 7. 36. d Gen. 24. 4. e & 28. 2. f Rut. 3. 1. g Gen. 21. 21. h & 2. 18. i Luke 3. 38. Reasons . * Treat . 5. §. 16 , 17. * Liberos qui voluptatibus nimis sunt dediti dabis operam vt coniugio astringas : vinculum enim hoc est tutissimum inventutis . Plut. de Instit . lib. k Gen. 1. 28. l Mal. 2. 15. Gen. 2. 18. * See Treat . 2. Part. 1. §. 9 , 10 &c. g Gen. 24. 57. What to be done if children like not such a match as parents thinke meet . Non cogitur filius-familias vxorem ducere . Digest . l. 23. c. 2. §. 21. Gen. 2. 22. Sacra in hoc negotio parentibus authoritas esse debet : sed tenenda est media ratio , vt sponte ac mutuo consensu inter se contrahant partes . Cal. in Gen. 24. vers . 57. Si filij innupti feruore aetatis in consuetudinem sornicandi inciderint , vos parentes in die iudicij rationem deo estis reddituri . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 11. * See Treat . 2. Part. 1. §. 2. * See Treat . 2. Part. 1. §. 11 , 12. b 1 Tim. 5. 8. c 2 Cor. 12. 14. d Gen. 25. 5 , 6. Ma● . 6 19. expounded . Vers . 26 , 28. Uers . 20. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Direction for laying vp portions . Pro. 10. 2. Eccl. 5. 12. * See §. 6. b Pro. 20. 7. c Deut. 5. 29. Parents on their death-bed to leaue good lessons to their children . d Gen. 28. 2 , 4. e & 49. 1. &c. * See Treat . 5. §. 9. d Gen. 28. 2. &c. e 1 Chro 28. 9. f 1 King. 2. 2 , 3 , &c. g Gen. 50. 16. Direction . b Gen. 28 , 2 , &c. c 1 King. 2. 2 , 3. * §. 4. b Gen. 28. 3. c & 48. 15. d 1 Chro. 29. 19. 1 Chro. 22. 17. & 28. 21. A Will to be made . b 2 King. 20. 1. Gal. 3. 15. Direction . Inconuenience of dying without a Will. * §. 56. The estate of parents to be left to their children . Gen. 25. 5. Leu. 25. 23. 1 King. 21. 3. Rom. 8. 17. Direction . d Pro. 22. 7. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Eph. 5. 1. Gen. 22. 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Hesychius 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 exponit 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Plutarchus dicit 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 vocari 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Arist . Rhet. 1. vocat vnicum oculum 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Reasons . b Deut. 21. 17. c 1 Chr. 5. 2. d Gen. 49. 3. e Exod. 13. 2. f Leu. 25. 23. g Vers . 25. h Vers . 28. i Num. 36. 8. Iniquissima volucris aquila in educanda sua prole dicitur esse . Pullorum enim alterum alis percussum abigit : alterum solum vti suum educat . Basil . Hexaem . hom . 8. Gen. 37. 4. c Gen. 25. 28. d Heb. 12. 16. * §. 68. Consentaneum est rationi naturae vt aequè tribuere cuique vitam , sic etiam viuendi facultates praestare . Basil . loc . citat . Deu. 21. 15. &c. Gen. 21. 10. Iudg. 11. 2. Iudg. 9. 18. e Gen. 49. 4. 1 Chro. 5. 1. * Sum. Syluest . part . 1. Tract ▪ de haered . Who are in place of parents . b Luke 2. 48. c Gen. 25. 1. d Exod. 18. 1. e Ruth 3. 1. Parents in law to performe like duties as naturall parents . f Luk. 2. 21 , 22. g Mat. 2. 14. h Luk. 2. 48. i Uers . 51. k Ruth 1. 22. l & 2. 22. m & 3. 1. n & 4. 16. Reasons . o Eph. 5. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . p 2 Cor. 11. 2. Senecae Hippolytus . Ouid. Metamorph . l. 15. sab . 45. Lurida terribiles miscent aconita nouercae . Ouid. Metam . l. 1. fab . 4. The next of kin to Orphants to be as naturall parents . * §. 71. b Est . 2. 7. c Vers . 11. d Vers . 20 , 22. Chap. 4. vers . 13. f Psal . 68. 5. Ruth 4. 6. 1 Tim. 5. 8. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Ioh. 19. 27. Tutela ad vtilitatem eorum qui commissi sunt , non ad corum quibus commissa , gerenda est . Cic. Offic. l. 1. c Psal . 10. 14. d Exo. 22. 22 , &c. * §. 28 , 34. The benefit of a good Schoolmaster . Scholas & phrontisteria virorum & mulierum philosophiae ethnicae addictorum constru● it . Nicep . eccl . hist . l. 10. c. 21. The benefit of a good Tutor . * §. 48 , 49. Notes for div A68107-e196850 Seruants must be informed of the lawfulnesse of a masters authoritie . a Numb . 16. 3. Grounds of masters and seruants places . b Exo. 20. 10. c Gen. 16. 9. Serui cum crediderint plus dominis carnalibus seruire debent . Cypr. Testim . l. 3. c. 72 See Treat . 1. §. 123. Prima seruitutis causa peccatum est , &c. Verum & poenalis seruitus ea lege ordinatur , qua naturalem ordinem conseruari iubet , &c. Aug. de Ciu. Dei l. 19. c. 15. b Gal. 3. 28. c Gal. 5. 1. d 1 Cor. 7. 23. See Treat . 1. §. 124 , 125 , 126. Seruants ought to feare their masters . b 1 Tim. 6. 1. 1 Pet. 2. 18. Mal. 1. 6. Tit. 2. 9. Gen. 24. Gen. 39. 8. Direction . * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Gen. 24. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Eph. 6. 5. Slauish feare in seruants . Mat. 25. 24 , 25. Seruants despising their masters . Mal. 1. 6. c 1 Tim. 6. 2. d Gen. 16. 6. a 1 King. 10. 8. b Iohn 21. 22. c 1 Sam. 3. 10. d 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . See Treat . 1. §. 96 , 124. e Gen. 24. 9. f Mat. 16. 14. * Treat . 3. §. 13. * Treat . 5. §. 4. 5. &c. When behouefull for seruants to speake to masters . * See Treat . 1. §. 124. g 2 King. 5. 3. 2 King. 5. 13. Mat. 26. 17. Gen. 24. 5. 1 Sam. 24. 10. Directions for seruants well framing their speech to masters . * §. 4. 2 King. 5. 13. 2 King. 6. 2. &c. Mar. 4. 10. 1 Sam. 26. 17. Mat. 16. 16. Ioh. 6. 68. 1 Sam. 3. 18. 2 Sam. 14. 18 , 19. Gen. 24. 35 , &c. Tit. 2. 9. Pro. 29. 19. * See §. 5. Pro. 15. 1. Mar. 3. 32. Iob 19. 16. 2 King. 5. 25. 2 Sam. 16. 3. 1. Seruants obeysance to their masters . Gen. 27. 29. 2 King. 2. 15. 2. Seruants dutifull behauiour before their masters . d 1 King. 10. 5 , 8. 3. Seruants seemly apparell . 1. King. 10. 5. 1. Rudenesse . 2. Too much familiaritie . 3. Pride . Zeph. 1. 8. * Treat . 3. §. 17. Treat . 5. §. 11. Luke 19. 14. Exo. 21. 6. Psal . 40. 6. Gen. 24. 5. Mat. 8. 9. Gen. 30. 35 , 36. 2 Sam. 18. 19 , &c. Pro. 31. 15. Mat. 8. 9. Mat. 25. 16 , 17. Exo. 21. 4. 1 Cor. 7. 2. * Sui iuris . n 1 Cor. 7. 36 , &c. Luk. 16. 1 , 2. vers . 8. o Gen. 30. 26. p & 31. 20. 2 King. 5. 20. 1 King. 2. 39. Philem. ver . 12. Gen. 16. 9. Gen. 16. 9. 1 Pet. 2. 18 , 19. What masters command , seruants must doe . Psal . 123. 2. Mat. 8. 9. d Gen. 24. 9. e 1 King. 18. 43. f Luk. 17. 7 , 8. Contrary . Refusing to be at command . 2 Sam. 19. 26. Iob 19. 16. See Treat . 8. §. 21 , 38. Obedience of seruants to pious instructions . b Ios . 24. 15. c Iohn 4. 53. d Acts 16. 15 , e 34. f Rom. 16. 5. Philem. v. 2. g Act. 10. 7. h Vers . 2. Contrary , 1. Loth to serue religious masters . 2. Mutter against them being in seruice . 3. Negligent because masters religious . 1 Tim. 6. 2. 1 Pet. 2. 18. &c. b Psal . 105. 18. c Gen. 39. 20. * 1 Pet. 2. 21. d Rom. 12. 19. e Matt. 5. 39. f Rom. 12. 21. g 1 Pet. 2. 21. b Tit. 2. 9. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . * See §. 12. e 1 Pet. 2. 21. f Mat. 26. 53. * See more of this point Treat . 5. §. 33. & 34. b Philem. vers . 11. c Pro. 13. 1. d Pro. 26. 3. e Pro. 17. 10. f Pro. 27. 22. I. Iam. 3. 12. * §. 4. * See Treat . 1. §. 124. 2 Sam. 18. 12. 1 King. 18. 9. &c. Iudg. 9. 28. m Luk. 19. 14. n Psal . 2. 3. 11. Col. 3. 23. Gen. 39. 11 , 12. Gen. 39. 6. Psal . 12. 2. 2. King 5. 25. Iohn 13. 29. Eye seruice . Matth. 24. 49. III. Sit seruus non vt seruus ad oculum , sed vt domini studiosus . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 12. Gen. 39. 9. Gen. 24. 12 , 27. Seruice on by-respects . Matth. 6. 2. IIII. Seruice to be done cheerefully . b Phil. 2. 7. c Psal . 40. 8. d Joh. 4. 34. e Gen. 29. 20. * Apostolus seruos monet dominis suis ex animo cum bona voluntate seruire , vt scilicet si non possunt à dominis liberi fieri , suam seruitutem ipsi quodammedo liberam faciant . Aug de Ciu. Dei , l. 19. c. 15. Direction . Heb. 11. 26. Contrary , Discontentednesse . Quicknesse . b Gen. 24. 18 , 20. c Gen. 24. 33. d vers . 49. e vers . 56. f 2 Sam. 18. 23. g 2 King. 4. 29. Diligence . h Gen. 3. 19. i Eccl. 9. 10. k Gen. 31. 40. l Luke 2. 8. * Mat. 25. 16 , 17. m Pro. 10. 4. n & 12. 14. o vers . 24. * & 14. 23. p 1 Cor. 7. 17. q Jer. 48. 10. Idlenesse . r Pro. 26. 13 , 14 , 15. ſ & 24. 33. t & 10. 4. u & 12. 24. x & 13. 4. y & 19. 15. z & 20. 4. a & 21. 25. b & 10. 26. c & 18. 9. d Mat. 25. 26 , 30. Pro. 14. 23. * §. 23. b Tit. 2. 10. c 1 Cor. 4. 2. d Heb. 3. 5. e Mat. 25. 21. Pro. 25. 13. Pro. 13. 17. Mat. 25. 21. Luk. 16. 2. Mat. 25. 30. 1. Seruants must well preserue their masters goods . b 1 Tim. 6. 20. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c Gen. 39. 4. d & 31. 38 , 39. Mat. 13. 27. Seruants must endeuour to increase their masters estate . Gen. 30. 30. Mat. 25. 16 , 17. Iohn 6. 12. b Tit. 2. 10. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c Acts 5. 2. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Luke 16. 6 , 7. 2 King. 5. 22. f Gen. 31. 42. 21. Of Hen. 8. Stat. 7. And 5. of Eliz. Stat. 10. II. a Gen. 39. 2. b Gen. 24. c Gen. 30. 27. d & 39. 2. e 1 Sam. 18. 14. f Gen. 24. 12. g Psal . 127. 2. h Gen. 24. 27. i Gen. 24. 17 , 23. k Vers . 22. l Vers . 33. III. a 1 Sam. 20. 12. b Pro. 11. 13. c Ier. 38. 27. Pro. 11. 13. & 20. 19. Pro. 18. 8. Pro. 16. 28. Pro. 26. 20. IV. Mat. 24. 45 , 46. Mat. 24. 49. Gen. 37. 18 , &c. Mat. 24. 49. Psal 2. 3. 2 Sam. 20. 1. * §. 11. * Heb. 13. 4. V. Gen. 24. 65. Points of vnfaithfulnesse in seruants about their masters children . 1 Cor. 15. 33. * §. 31. VI. a Gen. 39. 7. &c. b 1 Sam. 25. 14. VII . a 1 Sam. 16. 16. b 1 King. 1. 2. c 2 King. 5. 3. d vers . 13. e Iob 19. 15 , 16. f 2 Sam. 19. 26. g Mat. 26. 56. h 2 Sam. 4. 6. i Mat. 26. 15. a Leu. 19. 18. b Mat. 7. 12. Luke 17. 10. a Col. 3. 22. b Tit. 2. 9. Extent of seruants duties . * Treat . 3. §. 63 , &c. & Treat . 5. §. 35. Seruants must labour to bring their iudgement to agree with their masters . c Iudg. 19. 11 , 12 , &c. d Luk. 19. 25 , &c. e Mat. 13. 28 , &c. Seruants conceit of their owne wit. f 2 King. 5. 20. g 2 King. 2. 16. Luke 5. 5. 2 Sam. 24. 2 , &c. Pro. 27. 22. Restraint of the extent of seruants duties See the cautions , Treat . 3. §. 51 , 52 , &c. Nolite fieri serui hominum , i. nolite eis parere cùm turpia praecipiunt . Chrys . in 1 Cor. 7. hom . 19. Exo. 1. 17. Gen. 39. 9. 1 Sam. 22. 17. Seruis competit vt obediant dominis in ijs quibus mandato Dei nihil derogatur . Basil . Ethic. defin . 75. Act. 4. 19. Dan. 6. 10. Act. 5. 29. Ais ? aio . Negas ? nego . Terent . in Eun. 1 Sam. 22. 18. 2 Sam. 13. 28 , 29. Isa . 24 2. 1 Thess . 5. 17. Dan. 6. 7 , &c. Ioh. 7. 13. & 9. 22. Qui fidelem habet dominum , saluo eius dominio , diligat vt patrem . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 12. a Exo. 12. 38. b Leu. 25. 45. Deut. 5. 14. & 12. 18. & 23. 15. & 23. 7. c Ruth 1. 16. d Ioh. 6. 66. &c. e Psal . 120. 5. * §. 16. I. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b Matt. 28. 18. c 1 Cor. 8. 6. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . d Psal . 82. 6. 1 Sam. 8. 7. II. 1 Cor. 7. 21 , 22. III. b 1 Thes . 4. 3. c 1 Pet. 2. 15. d Ephef . 5. 17. e Rom. 12. 2. Psal . 19. 7. 2 Tim. 3. 17. IIII. Sciat seruus Deum redditurum seruitutis mercedem . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 12. Col. 3. 24. * Treat . 1. §. 127. What reward God giueth to good seruants . Est . 6. 3. c Gen. 39. 21. d & 41. 40. e Gen 39. 2. f & 24. 56. g Gen. 30. 43. h Gen. 43. 23. k 1 Sam. 17. 34. l 2 Sam. 21. 17. & 23. 15. m Luk. 6. 38. n Col. 3. 24. o Mat. 25. 34. p 1 Pet. 1. 4. q Gen. 29. 20. Notes for div A68107-e216030 a Col. 4. 1. b Psal . 101. 6. c Iob 19. 27. Reasons . Direction for choosing of seruants . d Psal . 101. 6. e Philem. vers 10. Why such seruants as feare God are to be chosen . f Gen. 24. 12. g Gen. 39. 5. h Gen. 29. 14. Psal . 101. 7. a 1 Tim. 3. 4. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . b 1 Tim. 5. 14. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . c Mat. 8. 9. Direction . d Jos . 24. 15. Psal . 101. 2. e 1 Tim. 3. 4. f Tit. 2. 15. g Mat. 8. 9. h Cant. 3. 5. How masters lose their honour . 1. By basenes . a 1 Sam. 25. 17. b 1 Sam. 21. 13. c 2 Sam. 19. 3 , 5. 2. By remisnes . 3. By familiaritie . d Gen. 16. 3 , 4. 4. By letting goe the reines . e 2 Chro. 14. 17. f Ier. 38. 5. f Ier. 38. 5. g Pro. 30. 22. h Eccl. 10. 5 , 7. h Eccl. 10. 5 , 7. i Gen. 31. 2 , 5. k Mat. 5. 22. l Iam. 3. 6. Quamuis dominus seruo praestet , tamen se aequalem iudicet quatenus homo existit . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 12. Serui colant potius te quàm timeant . Senec. epist . 47. Extent of masters power . * §. 20 , 21 , &c. Nothing vnlawfull to be commanded by masters . 1 Sam. 26. 9. * Treat . 7. §. 38 2 Sam. 13. 28. The Popes presumption . Extrauag . de maior . & obed . Alban . in lib. de potestat . Pap. & Eccles . Gratian. in Decret . dist . 40. * 2 Thess . 2. 4. In Ecclesia cath . semper creditum est Rom. Pontificem posse sua authoritate leges ferre , quae in conscientia obligent . Bellar. de Rom. Pontif. l. 4. c. 15. Gen. 18. 19. Exo. 20. 10. 2 Chr. 34. 32. 1 Cor. 7. 36 , 37. Matt. 8. 9. 1 Cor. 10. 23. 2 Sam. 15. 33 , 34. 2 Sam. 18. 20 , 21. 1 Cor. 10. 33. Exod. 5. 7. 2 Sam. 23. 17. * 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Si quis in domo per inobedientiam domesticae paci aduersatur , corripiatur seu verbo , seu verbere , sea quo . libet alio genere poenae iusto atque licito . Aug. de Ciu. Deil. 19. c. 16. Luke 12. 47. Leu. 25. 44 , 45 , 46. Ios . 9. 27. Exod. 21. 26. Exod. 21. 20. * Si Dominus seruum ceciderit , vel lethale vulnus inflixerit , reus homicidij sit . Iustin . Cod. l. 9. tit . 18. Apud Gentes animaduertere possumus Dominis in seruos vitae , necisque potestatem fuisse . Sed hoc tempore nullis hominibus qui sub imperio nostro sunt , licet fine causa legibus cognita in seruos suos supra modum saeuire Nam ex constit . Antonini qui sine cause seruum suum occiderit , non minus puniri iubetur , quam si alienum seruum occiderit . Iustin . Jnstit . l. 1. Tit. 8. Domini mitiores esse debent . Cypr. Testim . l. 3. c. 73. a Deut. 25. 3. b Pro. 26. 18. c 2 Sam. 11. 15. d Psal . 51. 14. e 2 Sam. 23. 15 , &c. * §. 8. a Pro. 19. 25 , 29. c Pro. 20. 30. Heris in famulos saeuitia adhibenda est , si aliter teneri non possunt . Cic. Offic. l. 2. * Seruam verberare viro maximae ignominiae est . Chrys . hom . 26. in 1 Cor. 11. e Exo. 21. 20. Eccl. 7. 21. — Adsit Regula peccat is quae poenas irroget aequas : Nec scutica dignum horribili sectere flagello . Horat. l. 1. Sat. 3. Exo. 21. 4. Iob 1. 15 , 16. 1 Cor. 7. 36. Quod fieri non debet factum valet . 1 Cor. 7. 3 , 4. Leu. 25. 39 , 44. Masters care in putting off seruants . * Coloss . 4. 1. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Difference betwixt iust and equall dealing . 1 Pet. 2. 18. I. Iusti patres secundum haec temporalia bona , filiorum sortem à seruorum conditione distinguebant : ad Deum autem colendum , in quo aeterna bona speranda sunt , omnibus domus suae membris pari dilectione consulebant . Aug. de Ciu. Dei l. 19. c. 15. De salute eorum qui in domo tua sunt sollicitus , ac peruigil existas , quia pro omnibus tibi subiectis rationē Domino reddes . Aug. de salut . docum . cap. 29. Directions for edifying seruants . Exo. 12. 44. Deut. 16. 16. II. Sufficient food to be allowed to seruants . Pro. 31. 15. & 27. 27. Luk. 15. 17. Luk. 12. 42. * Luk. 12. 42. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 . Luk. 15. 16. Luk. 17. 7 , &c. Pro. 29. 21. Pro. 31. 21. 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 1 Sam. 17. 33. 1 Sam. 17. 33. 2 Sam. 11. 15 , Memineris seruos homines esse . Cato . Exo. 1. 13 , 14. & 3. 7. 1 Sam. 17. 38. Exo. 5. 7. Deut. 5. 14. Seruants must rest in the night time . Psal . 104. 23. Seruants must rest on the Lords day . Gen. 2. 3. Masters who afford not time enough of sleepe to seruants offend . Pro. 31. 18. Vers . 15. How long time for sleepe to be allowed . 1 Cor. 7. 25. Matt. 8. 6. 2 King. 5. 6. Reasons . 1. Recompence . 2. Future benefit . 3. Charity . Luke 10. 33 , 34. Seruants that die , to be decently buried . Gen. 35. 8. 1 Sam 30. 13. Isa . 58. 6. See. §. 21 , 22. Gen. 30. 30. Luk. 19. 13. Pro. 31. 15. Contrary . 2 Thes . 3. 10. Masters must teach their prentises their trade . Directions for fitting seruants to some function . Pro. 31. 15. 1 King. 10. 5. Matt. 25. 15. 1 Cor. 12. 8. &c. Quod plurimorum commune est , in eo procurando minima diligentia adhibetur . Rerum enim propriarum maximam curam habent , communium autem minorem . Arist . de Repub. l. 2. c. 3. Praeter alias causas eosunt in rebus communibus negligentiores , quod eus alijs curae esse existiment : quemadmodum euenire solet in ministerijs servilibus . Arist . loc . citat . Pro. 31. 27. Ruth 2. 4. Oculus Domini pascit equum . Matt. 24. 48. Pro. 31. 13 , 15. Contrary , carelesnesse . Prou. 31. 15. 1 Sam. 22. 7. * See §. 13. Luke 16. 2. Psal . 101. 7. Gen. 21. 9. &c. Luke 13. 7. &c. A seruant is not for euery offence to be thrust out of doores . a Rom. 13. 7. b Matt. 20. 8. c Deut. 24. 15. d Gal. 5. 22. e Luke 10. 7. f 1 Tim. 5. 18. * §. 23 , 25. Direction for giuing wages . g Leu. 19. 13. Deut. 24. 15. h Deut. 24. 15. Jam. 5. 4. i Leu. 19. 13. Deut. 24. 15. k Gen. 31. 41. l Gen. 30. 30. * §. 34. m Exod. 21. 2. Deut. 15. 12. Contrary . n Ier. 34. 16 , 17. * §. 20. b Gen. 15. 2 , 3. Qui vere patresfamilias sunt , seruis in familia sua tanquam filijs consulunt . Aug. de Ciu. Dei , l. 19. c. 16. Matth. 25. 21. Rom. 13. 3. Gen. 39. 19. Deut. 15. 13. Exod. 2. 21. Matth. 24. 47. Gen. 31. 2. Sic cum inferiore viuas , quemadmodum tecum superiorem velles viuere . Senec. epist . 47. Luke 16. 2. b Leu. 25. 43. c Gen. 42. 18. d Neh. 5. 15. e Iob 31. 13 , 14. g Exod. 5. 2. h 2 Chr. 32. 15. i Dan. 3. 15. k Exod. 14. 28. l Isa . 37. 36 , 38. m Dan. 4. 30. a 1 Cor. 7. 22. b Matt. 24. 49. ●ominus fidelem habens seruum di'igat vt fra●rem propter fidei societatem salua sibi seruitute . Constit . Apost . l. 4. c. 12. Dominum patrem familiae appellauerunt , seruos familiares . Se●ec . Epist . 47. Mat. 24. 48. Pro. 15. 3. Vis tu cogitare istum quem seruum 〈◊〉 vocas , exijsdem seminibus ortum , eodem fruicoelo , aequè spirare , aequè viuere , aequè mori . Senec. Epist . 47.