The lavvyers plea, in the behalf of young Tom of Lincoln. Being an answer to a late scandalous ballad, entituled, Merry news from Lincolns-Inn. Adrest to the author of the said ballad, by Tom of Lincoln. To the tune of, Help lords and commons, &c. Tom of Lincoln. 1665 Approx. 6 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 1 1-bit group-IV TIFF page image. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2009-10 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). B04307 Wing L743 Interim Tract Supplement Guide C.20.f.4[111] 99884977 ocm99884977 182780 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. B04307) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 182780) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books; Tract supplement ; A4:2[112]) The lavvyers plea, in the behalf of young Tom of Lincoln. Being an answer to a late scandalous ballad, entituled, Merry news from Lincolns-Inn. Adrest to the author of the said ballad, by Tom of Lincoln. To the tune of, Help lords and commons, &c. Tom of Lincoln. 1 sheet ([1] p.). s.n., [London : 1665?] Imprint suggested by Wing. Verse: "LOrd help us all! what Story's this ..." "Merry news from Lincolns-Inn" has not been found. Reproduction of original in the British Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. 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Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Merry news from Lincolns-Inn. Ballads, English -- 17th century. Adultery -- England -- Early works to 1800. Dissenters, Religious -- England -- Controversial literature -- Early works to 1800. 2008-04 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2008-08 SPi Global Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2008-10 John Pas Sampled and proofread 2008-10 John Pas Text and markup reviewed and edited 2009-02 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion The Lavvyers Plea , In the behalf of Young TOM of LINCOLN . Being an Answer to a late Scandalous Ballad , Entituled , Merry News from Lincolns-Inn . Adrest to the Author of the said Ballad , by Tom of Lincoln . To the Tune of , Help Lords and Commons , &c. LOrd help us all ! what Story 's this , that makes so great a stir ? Forsooth who ever keeps a Miss , must fear this barking Cut ; As if no place but Lincolns-Inn , did harbour she destroyers , With Puritans he might begin , they wench as well as Lawyers : You Nonconformist - crop-ears , peace , and rail not against Wenchers , VVith you , Fanatick Babes encrease , far more than with the Benchers . Thou who want'st judgement talk'st of it , like a vile canting Varlet , And exercisest thy No-wit against an honest Harlot , Out of our house should she depart , she 'l learn to be more fickle , Lifting up whorish eyes with Art , at zealous Conventicle . You , &c. She went up stairs thou sayest at ten , and what of that you Tony , At twelve the learned'st of your men tip'd over the Balcony : To this so strange a sight there came a hundred pious sticklers , But all went off again with shame , like crop-ear'd Conventiclers : You , &c. It seems he call'd himself a Cat , and would have been a gibing , Her husband understanding that , came in and spoil'd his nibing : Says he , Cats fall upon their feet , when downwards they are tumbled , So down he threw him in the street , till his proud flesh was humbled : You , &c. But for the wench and Laundress Ruth , I must confess the story , That there was something in 't of truth , but all is for our glory : We keep the Child we have begot , and able are to bear it , Whilst others , do , or do it not , are ready to forswear it : You , &c. Is not this better than to go at night to the Peatches , Reeling and rambling to and fro , in danger of the VVatches : And meet at last a drab or so , with Petticoats bedagled , Or with a pocky Barren-doe , that from the Park has stragled : You , &c. VVoe and alas ! your Rudder's spoil'd , I pitty your mishap , And though you get not her with child , you get your self with clap : Then you go home and curse the whore , with all her Art-full dry-blows , Finding one pox to cost you more , than keeping twenty by-blows : You Nonconformist - crop-ears , peace , and rail not against VVenchers , VVith you , Fanatick Babes encrease , for more than with the Benchers . Thus you abroad with hazard roam , to find out Harlots fulsome , VVhile we more safely prey at home , upon a Girl that 's wholsome : Look to your selves , your case is worse , dry up your slubbring Ink-horn , I 'le warrant you we 'l find a Nurse , for our young Yom-a-Lincoln ; You , &c. A Bencher's Grand-child ! you mistake , you silly Rogue , I scorn ye , If a Lawyers Son a Lawyer makes , his Bastard's an Attourney : And thus our Tom in little time , shall grow to be our Brother , As a Bawds Daughter whores betime , t' enrich her greasie Mother ; You , &c. As for the woman , I confess we wrapt her in a Gown , And whosoever had done less , had been an arrant Clown ; For being to be call'd to 'th bar , and turn a female pleader , 'T was reason we should have a care , she should not shame our Reader ; You , &c. Long may she live a merry crack , brisk , airy , gay , and fruitful , She never any thing shall lack , so long as she is youthful : Grown old , her Daughters shall turn up , to please our youthful VVenchers , As when we 've eat our Commons up , we fall upon our Trenchers ; You , &c. As for young Tom I doubt is not , he 'l make some Learned spark , More wit he has already got , then an Attourneys Clerk ; Before that ever he could speak , he su'd for Alimony , Instead of Mothers-milk , he 'd take no Liquor but Stipony ; You , &c. Then blame not us of Lincolns-Inn , for what has hapned to us , Such wenching is a gainful sin , that never will undoe us ; For we shall keep the bantling cheap , among so many purses , Like Citizens that take a leap amongst their Country Nurses . God bless the King and Queen , likewise the House of Lords and Commons , But truly we shall ne'r despise some thing that is a womans , For should she Laws cart every one , that loves a little cracking , The City would be quite undone , their VVives must all be packing . FINIS .