Felo de se, or, The bishops condemned out of their own mouthes confessing their politick devices, and unjust practices, to settle and maintain their lordly dignities, and private interests, to the impoverishing and ruine of the nations wherein such idle and unprofitable drones are suffered to domineer : in a familiar discourse between the said bishops and their tenants, begun in 1660, the year of their unhappy resurrection, and continued to this present year 1668 : published for information of the people, who groan to be delivered from that yoke of bondage, which neither they nor their fathers were able to bear / by a mourner for the poor nations ... Ford, Thomas, 1598-1674. 1668 Approx. 130 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 23 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2004-05 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A39933 Wing F1512 ESTC R6792 12911742 ocm 12911742 95335 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A39933) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 95335) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1641-1700 ; 982:13) Felo de se, or, The bishops condemned out of their own mouthes confessing their politick devices, and unjust practices, to settle and maintain their lordly dignities, and private interests, to the impoverishing and ruine of the nations wherein such idle and unprofitable drones are suffered to domineer : in a familiar discourse between the said bishops and their tenants, begun in 1660, the year of their unhappy resurrection, and continued to this present year 1668 : published for information of the people, who groan to be delivered from that yoke of bondage, which neither they nor their fathers were able to bear / by a mourner for the poor nations ... Ford, Thomas, 1598-1674. 44 p. s.n.], [S.l. : 1668. Reproduction of original in Huntington Library. Attributed to Thomas Ford. cf. NUC pre-1956. 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Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Bishops -- England. 2003-12 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2004-01 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2004-02 Emma (Leeson) Huber Sampled and proofread 2004-02 Emma (Leeson) Huber Text and markup reviewed and edited 2004-04 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion FELO DE SE , OR THE Bishops Condemned Out of their own Mouthes : Confessing their Politick Devices , and unjust Practices , to settle and maintain their Lordly Dignities and private Interests , to the Impoverishing and ruine of the Nations wherein such idle and unprofitable Drones are suffered to domineer . In a Familiar Discourse betwen the said Bishops and their Tenants : Begun in 1660 , the year of their unhappy Resurrection , and continued to this present year 1668. Published for Information of the People , who groan to be delivered from that yoke of Bondage , which neither they nor their Fathers were able to bear . By a Mourner for the poor Nations , that are enslaved under Prelatical Tyranny , and one that was once of this black-fac'd Hierarchy ( as Luther was of the Popish ) but is now wonderfully delivered from them . K. J. In his Speech to a Parliament in the Year 1609. called , An Apologie for the Oath of Allegiance , hath these words ; I do utterly deny that there is any Earthly Monarch of the Church , whose Word must be a Law. Because earthly Kingdoms must have earthly Monarchs , it doth not follow that the Church must have a visible Monarch too ; for the World hath not one earthly temporal Monarch ; Christ is his Churches Monarch , and the Holy Ghost his Deputy . Printed in the Year of Hope . 1668. The Epistle to the READER . Courteous Reader , THou art here invited to see some strange and wonderful Creatures , and if thou canst spare two hours time to look in , and behold them in their strange shapes , subtilties and natures , thou wilt not loose thy labour or money ; possibly thou wilt wonder where such monstrous Beasts were bred , when thou hast taken a survey of them , and well pondred and considered them from Head to Tail ; it is twenty to one but thou wilt think , that I found them in Utopia , Arabia , or at Rome ; that such Hydra's could not be brought forth , and bred up amongst Protestants , and suffered to live and devour their Frutts : But to satisfie thy doubts , I do assure thee , that I found them nearer home , though they smel very rank of the Romish Air , and their Speech and Voices do assure us , that they are of that Breed , and who were their Sires ; yet I saw them thriving in the Brittish Fields , and knew that they were of a Forraign extract , yet the very same sort of Creatures that I enquired after . As soon as I went into the Fields and Vine-yards , I found them , and knew them to be of the Romish Crew , by several Marks , Spots , and Qualities ; but withal , they have some pretended ingenuity , begond some other Creatures , when they may get money by it , in confessing their subtilties and devices , as you may see in the Discourse within , which came very seasonably and accidentally to my hand . You know that Wolves , Foxes , Goats and Hoggs , have very rank smels , and are not fit Companions for any other Creatures , they stink so abominably , especially if they have been well fed in their Kennels and Styes , as these have been these several years . These are known to be the very same Cattel , that they were reported to be ; I knew them , as by their strong and hurtful scents , so also by their black feet , red faces , proud and lofty gates and carriages , disdainful looks , and churlish language , superstitious garments , covetous , tyrannical , oppressive , and persecuting spirits and practices ; their usual haunts and walks , and their different colours and complexions . For , whereas other Cattel are either white or black , red or brown ; these , and every one of them , have all these hues , white and black , red and brown , and therefore they may well be called wonderful , and strange : for other Beasts and these differ very much ; these can travel best in the dark nights , in dirtiest and filthiest wayes , so cannot others ; yea , other Beasts are fatted and fitted for the slaughter in a years time , but these are above seven years a fatting . All other Beasts are good for one use or other , either alive or dead , but these are good for nothing . The grease of Hoggs , Foxes and Doggs , is good for something when they are dead , but so is not theirs , although they are fuller of grease than than others : So that thou mayest search all the world over and not find the like Cattel ; not any Beasts of their proportion , colours , natures , works , devices , ends , practices , and unsatiable lusts . These are the most venomous , dangerous , and deadly creatures in the world , which the subtilest Naturalist can describe ; they have poyson in their Tongues and Teeth , in their Feet and Noses , in their Canonical Garments , in their Ceremonies , Worship , and Discipline . These are they that corrupt and poyson all sorts of men ; These are the Creatures that make the Earth to groan under them , that are the great Oppressours , and destroyers of thousands of souls and bodies in the Nations where they are . These are the most loathsome and hateful Creatures in the World , that have many a Curse daily , both from rich and poor . These are they that have driven the Lords Labourers out of his Vineyards , by violence and cruelty , and have usurped them into their own hands , and have spoyled the Fruit , and have most abominably corrupted and polluted the Lords pleasant and holy things . These are the Creatures that have destroyed Kings and Nations , that have been the immediate Authors of all the Miseries that have fallen upon States and Kingdoms . These are the Cormorants and Caterpillars , that have devoured the Earth , that have spoiled the Trade and Traffique of the Nations , and brought thousands to beggery . These are the Creatures that have made so many Widows and Fatherless-Children , that have filled the Land with blood and violence . These are the Corrupters of Counselers and Councils , the great obstructors of publick Iustice and Iudgement ; these do strain at Gnats , and swallow Camels , that neither fear God nor reverence Men , and that have mens persons in admiration for advantage . These are without Consciences , and such whose deeds are evil and only evil , and whose ends and rewards shall be according to their works . Reader , I shall detain thee no longer in the Porch , lest I should tire thee , and suffocate thy Stomack , before thou hast read and considered what is within ; but while thou hast an appetite , I would have thee haste in , where thou shalt see these strange sights , and hear them speak with strange tongues ; and if thou art in doubt whether they are such indeed , as upon the report of this Epistle they seem to be , I pray thee hear what they say of , and for themselves , whose Testimonies are sacred and canonical , and thy doubts will be quickly and fully resolved from their own Mouthes . Farewel . Felo de se , OR , The BISHOPS CONDEMNED out of their own Mouthes , Confessing their politick Devices , and unjust Practises , to Settle and Maintain their Lordly Dignities and Private Interests , to the Impoverishing and Ruine of the Nations wherein such idle and unprofitable Drones are suffered to Domineer . In a Familiar Discourse between the said Bishops and their Tenants . Begun in 1660 , the Year of their unhappy Resurrection , and continued to this present Year , 1668 , &c. Bishops . WEll met Tenants ; How do you do ? We are glad to see you in health . Tenants . Pray excuse us , Sirs , for we know you not ; pray tell us , what are your Names , and Titles , and from whence did you come ? Bish. We pray take notice , we are not mean and ordinary persons , we are Bishops , and are come for our Rents , that you ought to pay us ; although hitherto you have paid Rents to the uncircumcised Usurpers , yet now we that are of the Tribe of Levi , are instated in our spiritual Rights , and we demand of , and require you to own us for your undoubted Land-Lords , and pay us now the last six months arrears of Rent . Ten. Please your Fatherhoods , By what Titles are you dignified , or have you dignified your selves , that so we may give you your dues of Reverence ? Bish. Our Titles are these ; Lord-Bishops , Spiritual-Pastors , Grace , or your Grace , Holy Fathers in — Lords Spiritual , and it may be Temporal , or Temporary too . Ten. Very well , now we understand your Names and Titles , please your Lordships to tell us from whence you came . Bish. Although you be such silly Asses as not to understand it , yet we must answer you by a distinction , otherwise we shall leave you in the dark . If you ask us from whence Mr. Iohn and Mr. Thomas , &c. ( as such ) came , we shall answer you accordingly . But if your meaning be from whence we came as Lord Bishops , &c. we must answer you otherwise ; for as the subject matter of the question differs much , so the answers must be accordingly different . Ten. Very well distinguished ; please your Fatherhoods to answer to the first part of your learned distinction . Bish. To the first we answer , That we came out of Wine-Cellars , and smoaky Kitchens , as a drove of pittiful , poor , and base creatures , the Sons of poor inconsiderable Men ; where we were driven by unsanctified hands , and lay there among the Pots , until this happy day of our Resurrection . And truly , Gentlemen , we lay among the Pots , so many years , while the uncircumcised sate in our Saddles , possessed our Lands , and shut up our hands and feet in the afore-said places , that we are grown like Tuns ; and being swoln with too lavish eating and drinking , ( having nothing else to do there ) we were constrained to put these black Hoops or Surcingles about us , before we came forth , for fear lest our Vessels should have broken , and our garbidge fallen out , which would have stunk so abominably , that you would have loathed us , and not have entertained us in your houses , but have shut your doors against us , stop't your noses at us , and have abhorred us as a monstrous breed , unclean beasts , stinking vermin , coming out of the bottomless Pit ; but being fastened with these sanctified Girdles , we hope our Trunks will hold until we have pickt your Pockets , and chastized you for your sins . Ten. It seems you have lyen among the Pots by your scarlet Complexions . Bish. We have so , and you might easily have seen it , ( but you are a company of saucy ill-bred Jacks ) and not have troubled us to tell you so . Ten. Pray tell us whence you came as Lordships , Holy Fathers , &c. and where had you these qualities , transcendent-dignities , and lofty titles ? Bish. We derived them from Rome , we did not go over for them our selves , for we durst not do so , because our Rulers would not suffer that now , but we found them ready for us , and took them to our selves , ( though you must know we had them not gratis ) and we have brought them with us , to shew them to you , that you may own us for your Spiritual Land-Lords , and pay us the money we demand of you . Ten. What then , it seems you are Di●scessan Bishops ( pray pardon our rude speech , for you know we are plain Country men , and cannot speak like you ) and , as such , you are our Land-Lords , and demand Rents of us . Bish. Yes , you say true , you are our Tenants , and we your Land-Lords , as such , and we hope you will not deny to pay us our Dues . Ten. Pray your Lordships to dismount , and come in , and refresh your selves ? Bish. Have you any good Sack to make us drink ? Ten. No , if it please your Lordships , we are poor Farmers , and we think that a Cup of Beer will serve our turns . Bish. No , it will not serve our turns , though it may yours , we have drunk good Sack so long , that we cannot now drink your Beer ; pray send for some Sack for us . Ten. Please your Lordships to send for it , for we are but poor Tenants , and have no money , and we know that your Purses and Trunks are full ; but do what you please , we will not press you too far , for we do know that you do love to keep them full . But if it shall please your holy Fatherhoods to stay a while and resolve us a few Cases ( for we think you are best able , being , as you say , Holy Fathers , Spiritual-Pastors , and Land-lords ) and then we shall so far as we can answer your Demands . Bish. Well , let us hear what you have to say quickly , for we are in haste , and must be gone ; but we came for money , and money we must have of you before we go . Ten. Our first Case is this , Whether or no you are indeed such persons as you say you are ! viz. Lord Bishops , Holy Fathers , Spiritual Pastors , and Land-Lords , &c. Pray clear it a little more to us , for we have only your say-soes for it ; pray tell us where we may be satisfied of , and concerning such persons , with such qualities and dignities ; Are they to be found in the Scripture ? or where are they recorded ? that we may know who we own , and whom we serve . Bish , You are very hard to believe ; Are not our Assertions and Testimonies Sacred and Canonical ? were you not a company of Infidels , you would believe our Testimonies without any more ado ; for do you not know , that t is our Doctrine , That you are bound to believe as the Church believers ? that is , what his Holiness and the Fathers of the Church do say and teach . You are a Pack of pure Youths indeed ; What! will you not credit our Words ? But however , at This Time we will take some pains with you , to satisfie you , although we adjudge it far below our High and Sacred Dignities to talk with such Jacks as you are ; and know ye , that we talk with you now , not for your sake , but for your Moneys sake ; for we love and seek yours , not you . Therefore we answer , that you may look if you please into the Scripture , and if you cannot find such there as we have told you we are , then we shall send you to other Records , where we are sure you will find us . Ten. We thank your Lordships ; please you to sit still a little while , and we will , first search the Scriptures , and if we can find your Names , Titles and Dignities there , we will look no further ; provided the Scriptures approve of , and commends you , as appointed and sent of God in Mercy . Pray stay a little . Bish. Come on Tenants , Have you found us there ? You are a company of Dunces , you cannot find us there , can you ? Ten. No , we cannot find you there mentioned , as Legittimate , approved Children , or as Persons of any good Repute or Honour , but the contrary is very apparent ; so that we have found you there in black Characters , but we cannot find one word to your honour , but all to your shame ; not so much as one white Character of you there . Shall it please your Lordships to inform us , what other Records or Registers there are of you , that will discover you to be such as you say you are , that so we may be satisfied . Bish. What , is that all the account the Scriptures give of us , which you have told us , surely you are mistaken , if you say so . Ten. We pray you do not mistake us , for we do not say , what we mentioned is all that the Scripture speaks of you , but we hinted these at present , only to show you what , and how the Scriptures speak of you ; so that we begin to suspect you , that you are not Holy Fathers , nor Spiritual Pastors : We find Domineering Lords there , Belly-gods , and notorious Hypocrites , Persecutors , Oppressours , dumb Doggs , idle Drones and Shepherds , Bishops in Sheeps-cloathing , but are Wolves within ; zealous Promoters of Babylon , their own carnal Interest , but contemners of Christ , his Laws and Interest ; who pretend to serve Christ , but 't is not so ; they would have men to think and believe so of them , though themselves do know and believe the contrary . Bish. We advise you then to look into the Romish Records , and there you shall find all you desire to know of us ; There you shall find our Original , if you please but to look back to that wicked Traytor Phocus his time , who to obtain pardon of his horrid Murder , in killing his Master Mauritius the Emperour , to advance himself to the Empire did add sin to sin , and set up Pope Boniface , in the Papal Catholick Chair , whereby he became Lord Pope ; which said Pope with his Holy Successors , aspiring Universal Lordship and Dominion , under the notion of Spiritual Men , did exalt Bishops under them also , to Lordly Dignities and Revenues , Spiritual and lofty Titles , Power and Dominion , which accordingly they have handed over to , and received of each other from generation to generation , and we that are now in being , do consent unto , agree with , practise their Laws , and walk by their Rules , written and conveyed unto us their Children ; and our wayes are guided by the same Spirit , directed to the same ends , from which we are not willing , ( though necessity sometimes constrains us ) to vary one hairs breadth . We thought good to tell you this much , because 't is a great way to Rome , and we are loth you should be at so great cost and pains to look after us , but to tarry at home , and provide our Rents in due season , for that is all we would have you concern your selves about , and therefore we desire this may suffice you . Ten. Well , we shall at present rest in what hath been said , although we doubt not but you could have told us much more , but we are loth to keep your Lordships too long from dinner ; therefore pray tell us in the second place , what subtilties did you use to mount the Saddle of Preferment , in getting such fat Bishopricks , Lordly Dignities , and Dominion ? Bish. We will tell you very briefly and plainly ; First , When we saw all Obstructions removed out of our way , excepting our Consciences , then we thought it the wisest way to get a Grave made and bury them , and cause the Sexton to throw a great deal of Earth upon them , that so we might no more hear their clamours ; for till we took this course with them we could not be quiet , and we know that 't was impossible to get , and keep Bishopricks , and good and quiet Consciences also , and so concluded to put them into a deep sleep , and cover them up warm in the ground , and conjure them there to abide , until our Bishopricks should be taken from us , or we from them ; so that now we have many good and peaceable dayes , only we must tell you ( but pray be very private with it ) they do sometimes appear to us , like evil Ghosts , terrifying and affrighting us , but we make a shift by our Spels to lay them again , or else there were no living for us in this world . Secondly , Another notable device was to render all good Ministers , the were not without Conscience like our selves , as vile as we could , as odious and abominable as possible , unto our Rulers , that so they might despise them , and reject both their persons , and Counsels , lest they should have obstructed our designes , we were Eagle-ey'd , to spie out all opportunities , and to lay hold of them assoon as we could , with all possible advantages . We would be still buzzing their ears , that all Preachers that were not of the Prelatical Order , were not to be instrusted either in Church or State ; That they were men of dangerous Principles , enemies to Caesar , and what not . We did Reprobate them as the Iews did the Samaritans , we did cloath them in all the Beasts-Skins we could get , and made them all look like Bedlams , or some frightful Spirits , as the false Teachers did the Apostle Paul : And having been blessed with good success , in perswading Rulers against them , we proceed unto a Third Device , Which was to perswade our Rulers , That there was such a near relation between Church and State-Monarchy , and such a dependency upon each other , that 't was almost , if not altogether impossible that Monarchical Government should long subsist in the State , unless the like were set up in the Church also , although we knew 't was abominably false . King Iames tells us it is false , that there is no such thing : His words are these ; Because earthly Kingdoms must have earthly Monarchs , it doth not follow the Church must have a Monarch too ▪ Christ is his Churches Monarch . And though we did pretend that that was our end in endeavouring to set up Prelacy , ( viz. ) to secure and bear up the State-Government , yet it is certain , our whole design was , to set up and establish our selves in Lordly-Dignities , and get a Sword into our hands , whereby we might reign without controul , and crush whom we please under our feet . This was our Designe , our Consciences were , and still are witnesses , and 't is sufficiently evident to all men by our practices . Fourthly , We did frequently suggest to our Rulers , that the whole Nation ( excepting a few Phanaticks ) were for our Lordly Prelacy , and that by setting it and us up , they would greatly content and gratifie their Subjects : And the better to countenance it , we made a shift by our Agents ( and we promise you 't was a hard shift too ) to procure one or two grand Inquests , in the Nation , at Assizes , to declare for our designs , as also some few of the Militia , in their Musters , in and about London , and caused their Votes to be put into the News Books with great triumphs , as if the whole Nation had been for it ; but alas this was but a meer cheat , for it was well known then , and it is much more fully known now , that all the sober civil People of the Nation were and are against it , and we are convinced and satisfied that if men were called to give their Voices , there is not the fifth man in the Nation for us : The Nation groans under us , as under a heavy load . This was another device we made use of . Fifthly , We suggested unto , and perswaded our Rulers , That Prelatical Government would be the only means to enrich the Kingdom , to honour and set it on high , to make it terrible to forreign Nations , to preserve Peace , to bart the doors against Popery , and to supply publick Treasuries with money in time of need . These and the like subtil pretences and devices we had , which we doubt not but you are sufficiciently satisfied were but pretences . We could tell you of other feats we had , but let these suffice at this time , because we are in haste . Ten. We are satisfied in your ingenuous Answers concerning your setting up of Prelacy , and getting of Bishopricks , &c. and so much the more because we knew before what you have here told us . Now we desire you to resolve us if you are holy or consecrated , as we remember you hinted to us before ; Pray tell us , are you so ? Bish. Yes , yes , that we are ; there is no body that knows us , but will easily grant that , and we require you to believe so of us , or else you will wrong us and our Church . Ten. Very well ; then pray tell us what is so , and how you are so ? Bish. You are a Company of Woodcocks , you know nothing at all , if you do not know that we are consecrated and sacred , for we are consecrated throughout , with holy oyl that came from his Holiness , our dear Father ; we have holy Heads , Beards , Noses , and every part of our fat Carcases are holy ; yea all our Vestments , Hoods , Caps , Gowns , Surplices and Girdles ; yea our Doublets , Shirts , Shooes and Breeches are holy , being all consecrated with Romish Oyl ; and although our Breeches be now and than defiled and profaned at our merry Banquets , when our Vessels are over-charged , yet they are soon clean again , being near our sacred Bodies . But do you yet believe that we are so holy ? yea we can tell you what is incredible , our very Gate in walking in the street is holy : We suppose you have observed our manner of walking different from the Laity ; we go very wide , and set out our toes at so great a distance , that Hoggs with their Yokes on their necks may pass through our twists , but that they are afraid to approach so nigh our holy Shooes : Yea we are made so holy with the said Oyl , that we can spare a great deal , and yet have a enough for our selves too . Oyl with us is like oyl in the Womans Barrel or Cruse , 't is still full , although we sell away good store yearly , when we consecrate our Journey-men , or Curates , such as we imploy in our Service ; besides many Churches , Utensils , and Garments , and yet we are still full : 'T is wonderful Oyl , and we hope you do all believe so . Ten. Whether your Religion be the best , or as some say , the only Religion in the World ? Bish. Yes , we doubt not but 't is the best , and only Religion in the World : The Presbyterian , Independant , and Anabaptists Religions are pittiful poor things if compared to ours ; for there is not one Lord-Bishop nor Bishoprick among any of them ; alas , their Church-men are a company of poor pittiful fellows to us , one of them is contented with One hundred pounds a year , but we are not contented with five or six thousand pounds by the year . Besides , they will have all their Ministers work hard with them , and for them , every week , and that we do not like . They will have their Ministers fulfil their Ministry themselves ; but in our Religion , we can sit still , we can sleep , eat , drink , and rise up to play , and make others do our work for us . Yea further , their Religions are so strict , that men are watched , and if they do , or speak amiss , or neglect their work , they shall be presently told of it , and it may be reproved for it : but there is no such thing in our Religion ; there all sorts of persons may be a bad as their Bishops , and walk in their steps of Pride , and all other sins , and yet be blamless ; a man need not fear reproof in our Religion . Besides , in the said wayes of Religion , they will have such close-searching-Preaching , that 't is impossible for persons to be in quiet in their Consciences for them , they will have such persons as shall divide between the joynts and the marrow , as the Scripture speaks , that there is not a sin can escape their mouthes , but they will discover it to the persons in whom it is : But it is not so in our Religion , for we suffer no such Preachers to Preach openly ; and when we preach , we do all we can to keep all convincing Truths far enough off from our Auditors Consciences , knowing that if once the Consciences of men be savingly convinced by the Truth , they will forsake both us and our Church when once their eyes be opened to see our Church , what she is ; for 't is one of the Excellencies of our Religion , that we do not trouble each other , or any way interrupt each other in our several wayes of sinning . We let the People alone , and they let us alone ; we tell them stories and preach some good sayings of the Fathers , and some Sentences of Greek and Latine , and make the poor silly People cry us up for excellent Scholars , excellent Divines , good Church-men , and so we laugh to see what fools we ride ; for as we said before , our great care is to keep their eyes shut ; and they not knowing what a sad generation we are , have us in reverence , and dare not speak to us to tell us of our wickedness for fear of our horns . Again , their Religion is so strict , that we judge it wants much of that Charity that we have in ours ; they will admit none into their Churches that are openly scandalous , or grosly ignorant , but our Church is full of such : We are so charitable to all Athiests , Blasphemers , Drunkards , and all others , that we make no difference . Those persons that they do most highly esteem for holiness , we least of all regard ; we scruple not to give that which is holy unto Doggs , and to cast Pearls before Swine . 'T is our constant practice to do so ; but those other Religions are not so charitable , they make a separation between the clean and the unclean , according to the Scripture ; but we dare not be so strait , we can give Childrens bread to Doggs ; we keep open House , but these persons shut the Doors and keep them out . So that for these and other such like Reasons , 't is evident that our Religion is the best , if not the only Religion , excepting the Pop●sh . Ten. Now you speak of that , pray tell us if the Popish Religion and yours be not in many things alike ; for we have heard that those men , whom you call Phanaticks , have said , that it is very near of kin , at least in many things , pray inform us . Bish. How do such illiterate men as you are know that ? we promise you we have done all we could to keep you ignorant of such matters , for we knew if once you understood it , you would loath us ; but we begin to fear that they have found out our cloven feet : but seeing you desire our Solution in the case , we shall very briefly shew you wherein we and they agree , provided you will be private and keep it to your selves . First , They and we agree in Church-Officers , our Bishops are Anointed and consecrated , with the same Oyl , and by the same Authority that theirs are . Austin the Bishop , brought it over from Rome above One thousand Years since . That is one thing wherein we are exactly alike . Secondly , As they do Execute their Authority , so do we ; we have many such Courts and Officers as they have ; they keep Courts to get money , and to punish men in their own Names ; so do we to . The great design of setting up their Courts , and executing their Authority there , is to afflict , trouble and ruine the Innocent , and to fill their purses , by their oppressing and persecuting such ; so do we . 'T is our design and endeavour , and we have been succesful in it , and we promise you we will have you there to make trial of what we say , that by your senses , especially the feeling sence , you may be enabled to believe all that we tell you , if you do not prove good Tenants , and pay us our Dues exactly . Thirdly , Our Church was formed and moulded only by the Romish Pattern ; the very Foundation and Building is the same . Was theirs founded and built on Humane Policy , Laws , Decrees and Canons ? so is ours also . Is theirs of a Monarchical Form ? so is ours too . Are their Nations and Kingdoms made Churches ? so are ours likewise , and that by the like Prelatical hands . Are they guided and ordered by Humane Inventions and Prelatical Sanctions ? so are ours too . Was theirs formed to serve and maintain a Prelatical Interest ? so is ours also . Is theirs made to delude poor Souls ? so is ours also . Fourthly , We have some of their deluding and pernitious Doctrines , which we enjoyn Children to learn , that so they may be timely fenced against the Truth : As in our Church-Cathechism , we teach them to learn and say , That in their Baptisme they were made Members of Christ , Children of God , and Inheritors of the Kingdom of Heaven . And to make it the more authentick , and confirm them in the Faith of it , we teach them , and accordingly practise before them , in and about our Confirming of them , thus , Defend , O Lord , this Child with thy heavenly grace , that he may continue thine ; perswading them , that if they can say ( by roat ) the Lords Prayer , the Ten Commandments , and the Belief , that then they are undoubtedly such , and so need not to trouble themselves to look after Regeneration by the Word and Spirit . And to secure this Doctrine against all contradiction , we enjoyn our Curats to teach , and say , at all Funerals , whoever is buried , This our dear Brother or Sister deceased , in hope of a glorious Resurrection , although he or she lived and died notorious Swearers , Drunkards , and Blasphemers . Besides , we teach , That there are only two Sacraments , as generally necessary to Salvation , that is to say , Baptisme , and the Supper of the Lord. Where are implied ; 1. That the Sacraments are generally necessary to Salvation : which is a Doctrine of the Popish Church , but never taught by Christ or his Apostles . 2. Here is clearly implied , that the five other Sacraments instituted by , and used in the Popish Church , Are Sacraments , and of some use , and not to be rejected , although they are not generally necessary to Salvation ; they may and ought to be received , and used as Sacraments , though not mith that high respect , as the two mentioned . We have several other Doctrines of the same import , which we cannot now speak of , because we must haste home . Fifthly , We agree with the Popish Church in our Church Service also . They have a stinted Liturgy or Form of Prayer ; so have we also , yea , and in the most parts of it , it is the same , we borrowed it of them . Do they call it Divine Service ? so do we likewise . Look what Postures and Gestures they use in the reading of it , the same we use too . Do they Compel men to use those Prayers , and Punish such as in Conscience refuse to Conform to such Mock-Worship ? so do we too . Do they make an Idol of that their ill-begotten Brat ? so do we of ours also . So that to tell you the Truth we are very nigh them in our Service too . Sixthly , Our Ceremonies and theirs are Birds of a Feather ; ours are very like theirs . Do they make and account their Churches holy Places , and accordingly do them Reverence when they come there , by putting off their Hatts , congying , and falling down in their Seats on their Knees , when they first go into these Places ? so do we likewise . Do they ( as they say ) beautifie the Houses of God , in their adorning them with Gold , Marble , Pictures , and writing Sentences of Scripture on their Doors and Windows , ( as this is one Sentence , This is none other but the House of God ; this is the Gate of Heaven , ) to draw fools there to the Stocks , to get the more Customers to their Markets ? so do we likewise . Again , Do they use , and strictly enjoyn their Ministers the use of the Cross in Baptism ? So do we . Kneeling at the Sacrament , the Bowing at the Name of Jesus ? so do we . Pretended holy Surplices , Girdles , Gowns and other such like Trinkets ? so do we . Processions , holy Fonts , and holy Rails and Tables ? so do we too . Again , Do they place all their Religion in such base , carnal and unworthy things , in such pittiful empty nothings , gaudy vain shews , and trumperies of their own devising , to draw the eyes of sensualists , and to delude the minds of the simple ? so do we likewi●e . Again , Do they glory in their carnal , vain-glorious , out-side and formal Religion , judging , censuring , condemning and punishing all such for Hereticks , as are not of their stamp , and that dare not bow to their Image of Worship ? in like manner do we also . So that we hope we have satisfied you in this also . We might have enumerated many more pieces of their and our Religion , but time hastens , therefore let that suffice at present . Ten. If it please your Lordships , it be so as you say , we wonder that any reasonable Creatures will be of your Religion , for in our Opinion you are all much out of the way . Bish. Do you wonder at it , and think we are out of the way ? Truly we must tell you , so do we too ; we think we are out of Gods way , but as we told you , we be in our own way , in the right way to worldly Honour , Riches and Greatness , Ease and Prosperity , which are the things we aim at , and our Religion ( as we shewed you ) leads towards it ; and whereas you say , you wonder that any will be of our Religion , we do so likewise ; but we can tell you how we do get and keep persons with us : T is thus . First , Those that are more ignorant and yeelding , we do flatter , allure , and cheat , and with good words , and fair speeches , entrap such silly souls . Secondly , Those that we see are reaching after promotions , we do draw with golden baits , and silver cords , although we make some of them wait till their eyes be dim too , before they catch the fish , yet by this means we get a considerable herd . Thirdly , When we find others stout and backward to come to us , we drive them with iron rods , as you drive your Asses to their work ; thus you see by what honest means , prudent wayes and fetches we get fools into our pound . And we do assure you , if we had not used our best skill in practising these pretty devices , we had been as Fathers without Children , Bodies without Leggs , and Pastors without Flocks ; and we doubt not but we could by one or other of these devices , conjure you amongst us with others , but we suppose that you may be wiser in time . Ten. Please your Lordships to resolve us , for what ends are you set up so high , or whatuse are you of , or what transcendent work have you to do in your Church , beyond other men ? Bish. Ye are a company of Block-heads ; for if you were not , you would ere now have known us , and our works , ends and use ; but we shall tell you seeing you desire us . First , We are set up to serve the Lord , in doing his dirty work ; God hath lifted us on high , head and shoulders ( with Saul ) above other men , to imploy us in scouring work , that is , to scour his Vessels of Gold and Silver . For although we seem to be very high in respect of Men , yet alas , we are but the filthy , nasty , and black Skullions of the great God. You that are not very knowing men , may think , O surely Lord-Bishops are the most honourable and happy men in the world ; oh that we were as happy and honorable as they ! oh that we were in our Lord-Bishops-Coats , that we might be thereby capacitated to do the Church some honourable service ! But they are all mistaken in us , for whatever some do think of us , we are the most dirtiest fellows in the world , & are employed in and about the vilest work , ( as you know Scullions work is so : ) for God being offended with his golden Vessels , who while we lay among the Pots , grew very rusty , and almost overspread with canker and filthiness ; and he having occasion to make use of the worst and vilest of men , was pleased to call us out of our Dens , and Styes , and bid us go to Skullions-Scouring-work , and therefore gave us spirits and opportunities accordingly , to get Horns and Courts , Powers and Faculties , whereby to do the said work : in and about which work we have been exercising our selves to the utmost of our Power , and have scoured the flesh from the bones of some ; the nearest relations from each other : Estates from some , and Liberty from others : Some we have cursed as black as soot , and then have rub'd them so hard , untill we have separated their Souls from their Bodies , so that you see we are not erected in vain , we are of good use , and we fear we shall be rewarded accordingly . Secondly , We are set up to try Professors if they be such indeed as they pretended to be in their day of Liberty , that those that were approved might be made manifest , and those that were otherwise might not alwayes lye hid , and we have not in this neither laboured in vain , nor spent our strength for nought ; for by our means many are made much better , more strong , serious in , and adhering unto the Truth , and practice of what they professed . They are become more studious , and industrious for established hearts , more constant and fervent in Prayer ; much more cautious and watchful , more diligent to get loose from the world , and intent upon their eternal concernments . They have by our means more communion with God , more love to the Saints , and delight in the pure Ordinances of God , more united in the Spirit of Love and Forbearance ; but no thanks to us , for we intended no such matter , but the God whom they serve ; in despight of us , hath made such use of us , and so blessed our cruel hands , to their spiritual advantages , that they can say , it hath been good for them that they have been afflicted by our uncircumcised hands . But we must tell you also , that as some are made better , so others are much worse by our means ; for some that were outwardly holy , are now openly profane . Others that condemned Prelacy , their Church , and all their Trumperies , are now fully of us , and serve their Bellies ; as high in their zeal for us , and against all good men , and the wayes of God as we are our selves , as if they had been brought up with us ; and they sin more highly and presumptuously than some of us do , who never swore or declared against any of these matters , but did always love them , as being the only wayes to advance our selves and raise our Interests . And therefore thought it our wisdomes not to decline them , but to comfort our selves in hope that we might live to see these good dayes , and obtain our desires , as now you see we have . Thirdly , We are set up and used , to confirm the blessed Truths and Wayes of God , which his People espoused and professed , which once cost them but little or nothing : We mean , that by our wicked persecuting , and superstitious spirits and hands , God hath called forth many , both to bear clearer testimonies , and to seal them by their hardships , and sufferings , from and by us , whereby the holy Truths and Wayes of God appear to be real and excellent things indeed ; their suffering for , and sealing Truths and Practices , do greatly commend them to all men , and lay convictions upon them , that they are serious and weighty matters , and so thereby draw the eyes and hearts of persons towards them , causing such as accounted them but the meer fancies and conceits of a few precise persons , to believe them to be choice matters , and worthy of all acceptation , and perswading them that they ought to be embraced , and practised with all confidence and readiness , and at last to set to their seals , that they are most glorious Truths and Wayes , that they need not be ashamed of them , but own and profess them with all boldness ; and also our Lyes and Vanities , which we call Religion , and with which for a time , we corrupted the minds of men , to lose their place and interest in mens hearts . And as we are of use in the world for these ends , so also ▪ Fourthly , To devour , eat up , and consume the fat , and the sweetest of the Lands where we dwell ; for we do assure you , that we are great belly-mongers , and devourers of Gods good creatures ; we do daily eat the fruit of the field like Grashopers , and Cormorants ; our Bellyes and Appetites are like Horshleeches , that alwayes cry , Give , give . It is our study night and day , what we shall eat and what we shall drink , and where withal we shall be cloathed ; yea we can hardly find any creatur●s good enough to satisfy our ambitious minds , our greedy and curious desires , and appetites ; and therefore when we do not like the provisions our own Kitchens will afford us , or we are not willing to go to the price that such Provisions will cost , as we would have ; then we take a Coach and visit some Noblemans Table , hoping we may find better provision there gratis , although we pretend , and make their Lordships believe , that we , as their worthy Fellows , and Companions in dignity and greatness ( though the truth is we are not worthy to wipe their shooes ) come to visit them , as respecting their Dignities and Honours , and yet we know t is not they we do visit or respect , but their full Tables , and our own Bellys . Thus we consume the best creatures we can get , both at home and abroad , and we care not whose Bellys be empty so ours be full , nor how many Families perish through want by our means , so we can live like fed Beasts , for we can , and do eat the fat and drink the sweet , while we famish thousands . So that we have said enough to this also , considering how short our time is to be with you , and therefore pray be satisfied with these few and brief answers . Ten. We thank your Fatherhoods for what you have told us , for we assure you that our eyes begin to be opened , and to look out of their holes , wherefore we entreat you to open them a little more , and tell us how , or by what means or wayes you do keep so fast in the Saddles of your Dignities and Bishopricks , you being such a generation of men , as we now perceive you are . Bish. We will very briefly tell you , if you do not know , provided you will conceal and keep to your selves what we shall tell you . First , We have with a great deal of subtilty procured a Law , to punish all such as shall speak or write against us , to lay us open to the World ; so that 't is no matter how abominable we are now , for having tyed up mens mouths , and prohibited their pens , we may be as wicked as we will or can , no men nor doggs dare open their mouthes , or use their pens to convict , or so much as to discover our filthiness ; and do you not think this was a pretty shift to keep us in the Saddles ? We promise you , we laugh at it , when we consider how wilily we acted , and how seasonably and prudently we play'd our game with the Legislative Powers , for we were very timely in it : And if we had neglected that season before we were discovered to them , we are confident our Market had been spoiled , for were it now to have been done , we are perswaded that we have so far lost our selves in the hearts of those persons , that made that Law , they having found out our wickedness , that they would utterly reject any such motion ; which our learned wits foresaw ; so that now we are pretty well secured from all men , that are justly provoked at us . Secondly , We do as Woolsey and Bonner , Winchester or Stephen Gardner , and their Adherents were wont to do in their Princes Courts , we do keep two or three , or more of us , close there continually , what ever work is left undone , we are very precise in that : And their work is to observe who comes there , and what they say and do , and to know what matters and counsels are on foot , and to dive into our Princes secrets , all we can , and to understand what they intend , and what they are about to do , that so if there should be any thing started against us , we may crush the Cokatrice Egg betimes , lest it should come forth and take the air , yea we feel the pulses of Counsellours , and Nobles , and sound them all we can , and as we find matters we do improve them all we can to our own advantage , how prejudicial soever it may be to thousands else . Thirdly , We endeavour , as much as possible , to keep all persons , that are not of us and for us , as low as we can , and we are still clamouring with our Princes against them ; representing them as persons not worthy to live in the Land ; and that all that are not of our black-fac't Hierarchy , are disloyal and disaffected persons to their Rulers , and keep them from having access unto them , lest they should make us appear to them in our colours , and so alienate their hearts to us ; although we are fully convinced that we abuse them , and that those men whom we represent as Monsters to them , are far better than our selves , and are more sincere in their profession of Love , and service to God and man , than we are our selves ; who in all our pretended love , zeal , and loyalty , to God and them , do nothing but designe the setting up , and upholding our Interests , our great Bishopricks , high Titles and Dignities . Yea , we keep , as much as we can , all such persons as do not jump with us in our designs , from making known their grievances , and the many wrongs and injuries we do them in our Courts , and otherwise , to their lawful Magistrates , that so we may keep our Interests entire and unmolested . Fourthly , We imploy and send forth , as ignorant doltheads , debauched and superstitious Curats , our Journeymen , as we can find , to work for us in our profitable Vineyards , that they by their Doctrine and Practice , may deb●uch and keep persons in gross ignorance : We instruct them what they shall say , and how they shall speak of us their Masters ; and they understand our meaning , and what our designs are , ( viz. ) to endeavour all they can to preserve our reputation among the People , and to cry us up as Persons that came from Heaven ; and our Orders , and Authority , and high Dignities , as divine and sacred things ; and to preach as little as possible , and to fill their belly with our old Broath , which hath stunk in the nostrils of all sorts of men these thirty years , and is very odious both to the taste and sight of the wisest and holiest men . For we know , that if we should imploy holy and able Ministers , to communicate the Light of the Gospel among the People , their eyes would soon be open to discern us , that it would be impossible to hide our deeds of darkness from them . Moreover , we were the men that procured that Law , to silence all honest and conscientious Ministers , because they stood in our way , and withstood and obstructed our designs , so that we could not reign in that height , peace , splendour , and tyranny as we defired , until we caused them to be removed , that so we might hear no more of them , and that room might be made for our Journey-men . By these and such like means , we got up , as we shewed you before ; and by the same , or such like , we do sit fast as yet in our Saddles . Ten. We are satisfied in what you have said as to that also : Now pray tell us if you be such Bishops as are spoken of in the Scripture , or whether you are like them in qualities , call and practices there mentioned ; and all that take upon them the office and work of Bishops , are appointed and commanded to be ? Pray tell us briefly and plainly , as you have other matters already . Bish. No , in no wise ; for did you ever know such Bishops come from Popish Rome , as came from Ierusalem ? Rome is our Mother , she that is the mother of harlots and abominations : but ▪ Ierusalem was theirs , that is mentioned in Scripture , and approved of by Christ. They were made Biships by the Spirit of God , which we do hate and deride ; by the Laws and Authority of Jesus Christ , as their Lord and King : but we are made by the Antichristian spirit , Laws and Authority of Rome , and , as Prelatical Bishops , we have nothing else to shew for our selves , but what was handed over to us by Romes Authority . But that we may throughly convince and satisfie you of what we do here assert , we do desire you to take a little pains with us , and hearken unto us , while we do briefly shew you in some particulars , wherein the Scripture primitive Bishops and we are unlike , and do disagree ; and indeed to tell you the truth , we are almost , if not altogether , as unlike them as Light is to Darkness , Sweet to Sowre , Black to White ; the Priests of Baal to the Lords true Priests ; for we have nothing but the Name of Bishops , we are no way worthy of the Name , much less of the Office , Work , Honour and Reward of a true Bishop : Alas we are but meer Shadows and Images of real Substances , meer pretenders to it , for our gain , honour , and filthy lucre , as will evidently appear in these following particulars . First , The Scripture and primitive Bishops were the Peoples Spiritual Servants , such as did administer to them spiritual things , in the name , by the authority , and according to the appointment of Christ , as his and their servants , and were expresly forbidden to Lord it over their Flocks . The Apostles did account it their highest honour , to be Christs and the Churches servants , as the Scripture tells us . But we do Lord it over Gods heritage , and domineer over them , as if they were not worthy to wipe our shoes , or to speak to us ; and we are greatly displeased with such as do not cringe to us , and give us our Titles : yea , we do tyrannically Lord it over the Kings true and honourable Subjects , such as have adventured their Lives and Fortunes for his Interest . Yea , we Lord it over , and carry it disdainfully towards many of the true Nobles and Peers of the Land. We do tyrannize and Lord it over , 1. The Bodies and Liberties of the Kings loyal Subjects , if their Consciences be not so large , stupified , and besotted as ours are , to joyn with us , and bid us God speed in our wicked wayes ; them we cause to be humbled after taken , and imprisoned for meer triflles , and we have Agents fitted to serve our turns , and execute our tyrannical and bloody decrees . 2. We Lord it over their Estates , endeavouring to ruine such as do not please us , and our Journey-men ; we cite them into our Spiritual Courts , and cause them to wast their time , and spend their money , while their Families want bread at home ; vexing and driving them up and down at our own and our Curates pleasures , and at last fine them , or persecute them else where , till we have almost , if not altogether , ruined them and theirs ; there are thousands in the Nation can sadly and experimentally testifie this against us , but that they fear our wrath and hot displeasure . 3. We do not rest there , but we do also Lord it over their Consciences , endeavouring to bring that which is subject only to the Lord of glory in subjection unto our proud humours , our uncontroulable Prelatical Authority ; and all the Engines we can procure , we make use of to effect our purposes , which is to rob Christ of his right and due , and to bring over all his Subjects to our usurped Lordly Interests and designs . Thus did not the Scripture Bishops . We profess to you , that we would not have Christ to reign where we reign ; or if we allow him a small interest in , and rule over mens Consciences , 't is but as an underling to us , or as it may consist with our usurped and tyrannical Authority , and be subordinate thereunto . This is so evident , as that he that runs may read it ; besides many other things ( which we do here , as in other things in all our discourse , omit for brevities sake ) in this , that when we visit our herds , and herds-men , ( that are our slaves and drudges ) we do not at all enquire , if men do subject themselves unto , and obey the Laws , Orders , and Appointments of Jesus Christ ; but , whether our Heards-men and their Herd , be obedient unto our Laws , and Authority ? and such as we find conformable and obedient to us , our Orders , and Appointments , we do embrace as our dearly beloved Children , how vile , rebellious , and disobedient soever they are to the Orders , and Appointments of Jesus : And if any be found disobedient to us , and our Authority , Laws and Orders , we do more or less punish them , with our Canonical Rods : But they may be open and flat Rebels against Christ his Authority and Laws , and no notice taken of it . Oh horrid wickedness ! Yea , we do much more mind the honour of our Apparators , and Houses , than we do the Lord Christs . Secondly , The Scripture Bishops were constant Preachers of the Gospel of Christ , to their Flocks ; they did give themselves wholly to the work which they had received of the Lord , that they might fulfil it , to the glory of Christ , and the edification of his People , according as they were appointed and enjoyned . They did preach the Word in season and out of season : yea , sometimes night and day , they did labour in the Word and Doctrine ; and did watch the flock over which the holy Ghost had made them Overseers : But we are least of all concerned , or do little or nothing at all concern our selves , in that which is indeed our only work and business , as we profess our selves or pretend to be Bishops over Flocks . Our business is , and we wholly devote our selves to look after our Revenues , Honours , Cour●s , and earthly matters ; we care not if the Devil do our work ▪ so we may have our Lordly Titles , Popish Honours , and Revenues , glutting our Bellys , and cloathing our Backs , and riding about in our Coaches , to take our pleasures , and to fill our selves with wordly delights ; if we can keep in Princes favours , and blind the eyes of Counselours , flatter and delude Legislative Powers , to keep us in the height of our Pride and Luxury : These are the matters we imploy our prudent heads about from year to year , for we can neither Preach nor Pray when once we are Lord Bishops . We can Opprass , Suppress , and Persecute those that can and would labour in the Word , and fulfil the Ministrey they have received . We account it a great disgrace , and far below our Lordly Dignities , to Preach the Word of God , except it be now and then , in Princes Courts ; 't is too unworthy a work for Us to be exercised in , among the Rascal Herd . But we must hast homwards , for Our Bellies begin to cry Cubbord . Thirdly , The Scripture Bishops entred into their Ministry by the Door of Christ's Authority , according unto his Laws and Orders ; they durst not run till they were sent , nor come till they were called , nor go into the Vineyard , until the Master of the Vineyard sent or thrust them in . But we like Thieves and Robbers , climb up another way ; a way which Christ never appointed , neither doth he own or bless ; yea , though we plead ( like so many crafty Lawyers for their Fees , though they know their Clients Cause to be bad , and unjust ) That our Call , Standing , and Ways of prôcedure , are of Divine Right and Institution , to deceive the simple , that cannot fathom our depths of Treachery ; yet we can no longer remain undiscovered to the wise and Prudent , but we are sufficiently discerned to be Intruders into , Usurpers and Ravishers of the Ministry , and Flocks of Christ , Wolves in Sheeps-cloathing ; and therefore 't is no Wonder that so many do refuse to own us for their spiritual Pastors . Fourthly , The Scripture Bishops were contented and well enough satisfied with that portion of worldly things , which Iesus Christ their Lord had provided and appointed for them ; as persons that laboured in the Word and Doctrine , and what their particular Flocks were able to aford them : And we do assure you that Jesus Christ never appointed or gave to them such fat Bishopricks as our forefathers had , and which we have usurped : for look what Christ by Paul told and charged Timothy ( viz. ) that he having food and raiment should be therewith content ; was an Order sent to all Christs Bishops , which they accepted of , and were contented with as sufficient . But we are like greedy Doggs , that can never have enough : And such as put not into our mouthes , we prepare war against them . We are the most dis-satisfied persons in the world , for when we have traded in fat Livings , from two hundred pounds , to three hundred , and then to four or five hundred by the year , we are restless and dissatisfied , as a Fish out of the Water , or as a Stone out of its Centre : For then our next care is to procure money enough to purchase a Deanary , or some higher Promotion ; and when we have gotten that , then we make it our chief study , care and endeavour , to get a Bishoprick , ( being so near it ) so that we can hardly sleep night or day , until we are mounted and fixed in the saddle of a Bishoprick ; and then our great care is how to preserve and maintain our Pomp and Greatness , by racking and squeezing who we can , to gather in our thousands , and ten thousands : And being in the Saddle of a Bishoprick , we are not at all satisfied , but are exercising our wits about some Augmentations , or present Honours , and Estates : And we do greatly envy the greatest Nobles in the Land , because they exceed us in any thing of true Worth , Honour , or Estates . Fifthly , We find that Scripture Bishops did all they could to fill up the Ministry , and supply the Vineyards of the Lord , with able , holy , and faithful Ministers , such who would make it their work to serve the Lord Christ , not their own Bellies : such as did readily accept of the work , not the wages only , or chiefly . But we have beaten out the Lords Labourers , such as he planted in his Vineyard , that we might bring in some of our ill-begotten Sons into the Vineyard . We care not who , or what they be , so they will bow to Us , and call Us Father , and Lord , and officiate as our black-mouth'd Chaplains : for we would not have them look , nor speak , or walk like Christ's Ministers ; if they will observe our manners , and walk as they have us for Examples , obey our unholy Orders , and bloody Decrees , no matter what Loyterers , and Bishop or Beastlike persons they be . Sixthly , The Scripture Bishops were men of peaceable Spirits , doing their own work with quietness , labouring to make and keep others so likewise . But we , through our unsatiable pride , envy , and malice , have , and do labour all we can , to make snares , and bonds to catch and captivate our neighbours ; yea , the peaceable of the Land do we disturbe , vex and turmoil , and all to gratifie our unquiet spirits , which be conjured up . We are like the troubled Sea , whose Waters cast up mire and dirt . And indeed , as we are a most wicked Generation of Creatures , having little or no peace at home , so we are never better satisfied then when we disquiet others . Seventhly , They did greatly rejoyce when by their Labours they did win souls to Christ , and could help them forward in grace , comforts and fruits of holiness ; their flocks adhering to and standing fast in the truth , as 't is in Iesus ; their walking in Christs appointments , owning and submitting to his Authority , as their Lord and Lawgiver ; and the more their practices were like Christ's , the more their faces did shine with Christ's glory and Image upon them , the more they rejoyced in , and for them , and the more they loved them . But we hate and persecute such , we are grieved when souls are converted to Christ , because then we know , that we shall lose our subjects , and that , they being made subjects of Christs Kingdom , and having gotten spiritual weapons from him , they will fight against our kingdom of darkness , with their faith , prayers , and tears . And some ( as Luther did ) with the Sword of the Spirit , the Word of God : And that we shall have no more homage and service from them . For we find that Christ translates persons out of Kingdoms of Darkness ( as ours is ) into his Kingdom of Light , by which they see our darkness and hate it . For we fear nothing more , nor grieve at any thing so much as the loss of our Subjects , or rather Slaves ; and therefore to prevent it , we do all we can to send them Preachers , that we think God will never bless to the converting of souls . They were supporters of the weak , comforters of the feeble minded , and poured oyl into their wounds , to heal and refresh them . But we fall upon them with open mouthes , push them with the shoulder , and tear them with our iron teeth , imprison , punish , and as much as in us lies ruine them ; so that we are not miscalled Bishop-bite-sheep . Eigthly , Scripture Bishops did not constrain their flocks to subscribe and swear to humane Inventions , Antichristian Laws and appointments , and punish them that refused ; or such as did in Conscience deny to pay the tenths of their Estates and Labours , to Idol dumb Shepherds , to idle Drones , to Strangers , Thieves and Robbers . But we do : 'T is our constant practice , as the poor enslaved Nation can sadly witness . There is no man fit , or worthy to minister the Ordinances of Christ , but such as will subscribe and swear to us , and our wayes , though they do it to their present and eternal wrong and shame : And such as will not , we cast out of their Work and Free-holds , we brand and mark them with odious Reproaches , and render them to all as Enemies to Church and State. Ninthly , Scripture Bishops did look upon , and own themselves , as Christs and the Churches Servants , to administer his Ordinances , and execute his Laws , only to , and among their flocks , and they brought in none of their own amongst them , but kept close to the Lord Christs Orders , in all their administrations . But we appoint , set up and administer our own Laws and Ordinances , not minding or regarding Christ's ; so that we serve our selves , not the Lord Jesus , in administring . 'T is our own authority , the products of our own brains , that are obeyed and respected in our own & Iourneymens worshiping , though the common People see it not . Tenthly , Scripture Bishops feed and watch over the flocks , over which the holy Ghost had made them overseers , with their own hands and eyes , not by their Iourneymen ; they take the charge and care themselves , as judging it their own work . But we , like Scavengers or Nightmen , who lye and sleep , or sit at Alehouses eating and drinking , while some dirty persons do their dirty work , as they please . Iust such a sort of men are we , wallowing in all idleness , pride , and filthiness , while our dirty Iourney-men do our dirty work . Eleven . Scripture Bishops by Christ's appointment , took the care and charge only of one particular Church or Congregation , one Bishop had the oversight only of one Church , although sometimes one Church had several Bishops , and they found they had work enough to do , in a constant and conscientious discharge of their whole work among them . But we are so worthy , able , and transcendent in our own apprehensions , that we can , and do undertake the charge of several hundreds of Congregations apiece ; and do you not think that we are brave Fellows , notable Pastors , laborious Workmen ; and that we ought to be Lorded , rewarded and reverenced , some of us 500 , some 700 , and other some 800 times more then the Scripture Bishops , seeing our charges are so much exceeding theirs ; though we never see the thousand part of them . Yea , we are priviledged beyond they , for we can capacitate some of our Iourneymen Scavengers , to have two , three , four or five , yea , ten Churches ( as they call them ) at once . So that you see our unlikeness in this also . Twelve . Scripture Bishops , never enjoyned or appointed humane , absurd , insignificant Ceremonies to worship God withal , nor did they appoint , or enjoyn , certain peculiar garments to be worn by Ministers , as peculiar to them . But we like ghostly Fathers , Scribes and Pharisees , wear , and enjoyn our Curates to wear , long garments , singular attire , different from all other men ; thus they must do , or incurre our hot displeasure , because it is our pleasure , how odious and ridiculous soever they are . Thirteen . Scripture Bishops lived holy lives , they practised what they preached , and preached what they practised , endeavouring to teach , encourage and draw men to Heaven by their heavenly Doctrine , and spiritual Conversations ; they did shine before their flocks , in serious godliness , humble and meek deportments , in their self-denial and mercifulness , in diligence and faithfulness in their callings , and in other holy practices . But we are men of other spirits and wayes , our steps tend another way , they lead to the Chambers of death ; so that 't is very dangerous treading in our steps , or walking by our rules , or to follow our examples ; for if any be so sottish as to follow our dark Lanthorns , they will stumble , fall , and be broken without remedy : For we are such guides , as lead all that will follow us to destruction , and that in the greatest silence and security we can , lest we should draw inquisitive eyes upon us . Yea farther , we will tell you , That there is no real worth in us , we are such a crew , such a nest of fowl Birds , that there is hardly any thing worth the name of Good in any of our Lives . All spiritual Eyes may see whence we came , and where we are going ; whose we are , and whom we serve ; who imploys us , and who will reward us ; that we do neither know Jesus Christ , nor believe in him ; that we have no saving acquaintance , either with him or his Laws ; that we neither fear , love , nor serve God , but our own Bellies ; yea , we make use , ( as we please and have occasion ) of the Name and Word of Christ , for no other ends but to promote the covetousness , pride , tyranny , and ambition of our hearts ; that we make all Religion to serve our carnal designs , gain of pretended godliness , and retain the Truths of God in unrighteousness , willfully shutting our eyes against the Light , lest we see our filthiness , and pull trouble upon our Consciences ; endeavouring to suppress it as soon as it appears , and would make Conscience speak lowder . Yea , what ever some men think of us , we know that many of the Kings true subjects are as yet greatly deceived in us , we are so far from having such spirits as the Scripture Bishops had , or walking as they did , that we are earthly and sensual ; some of us have our mouths full of cursing and bitterness : destruction and misery are in our wayes , the way of truth we have not known , neither is there any fear of God before our eyes : but we are altogether out of the way that leads unto Life . Yea , our feet are swift to shed blood ; and we have such guilty Consciences , when they appear to us out of their Sepulchres , such filthy stinking Conversations , that we dare not reprove any abominations practised by others ; and so we partake of their sins , and lye under the guilt of their wickedness , as being the Peoples spiritual Lords and ghostly Fathers . Fourteen . Scripture Bishops sought the glory and honour of their Lord and Master that imployed them , the welfare and enlargment of the Kingdom and Gospel of Christ ; that he might reign , be owned , and glorified every where . But we look not at all after that , our business is , to seek our selves , our own glory and renown , great riches and promotion , to be called of men Rabby , to have thousands and ten thousands fall down and worship us , our Image , and Authority ; to have great and small under our girdles , at our becks and appointing , that our posterities may be exalted , and that our glorious names , titles and dignities , may be recorded to posterity . They did make it their business to discountenance and beat down sin , and promote serious holiness , the power and life of godliness : But we are the chief upholders , promoters , and encouragers of wickedness , doing all we can to discourage true holiness , and the practicers thereof . Fifteen . Scripture Bishops , did glory in the Cross of Iesus Christ , rejoyce that they were accounted worthy to suffer shame for his Name and Word . But we contemn his Cross , set our minds on , and glory in earthly Crowns and Bishopricks , in our Lordly Revenues , lofty Titles , Honours , Power and Greatness ; we neither think of , nor design the Lords Cross , that is below us . Sixteen . But we must haste ; therefore lastly , Scripture Bishops were called to the Ministry by the People they were to administer unto ; they durst not intrude themselves , but waited for such a Call , knowing that they had nothing to do there without their free consent ; and that if they should thrust in themselves , neither Christ nor his People , would , or could own , or bless them , and that alwayes in such cases , Vox Populi is Vox Dei ; the Call of the People , is the Voice of God. But , both we our selves , and also our Curats , are gross Intruders , like Hildebrands Hoggs , who being unyoked , break through hedges , and violently thrust our selves into others Proprieties , and plunder them of their fruit , and are as welcome as Hoggs in Corn fields . Thus we have informed you how unlike we are unto the Lords Bishops mentioned in Scripture ; and as we told you , there is no similitude or likeness between them and us . So we hope you see it made evident to you , and therefore you will not for time to come deceive your selves , in thinking us to be better than indeed we be , for we have told you the naked truth , and we could tell you a great deal more of the like stuffe ; as that Scripture Bishops were equal , of the same size , there was no inferiority nor superiority among them ; one was not a Lord Bishop , and another his Chaplain or Curate : Christ crusht that spirit , that was rising amongst them , of Lordliness , before he left the world . But we have cut Ministers into several sizes and degrees , with our sacred hands ; so that one sort are Apes , another sort Asses , some are Servants , others of the same tribe are Lords and Masters . But you are a company of Cockbrains , you are such Noddy-caps , that you know nothing but what you are taught by us your Ghostly-Fathers : alas men , you understand not the mystery of Prelacy ; you see not our deep witted craft , policy , treachery , and deceit ; you look on us , and see us carry about mens faces , being fastened unto our fat shoulders , but you see not our hearts , and brains ; could you find us out , you would see a Pack of Cards that are all Knaves , a Herd of Beasts all Spotted , were it not that we delude such Simpletons as you are , with our golden Titles , gay and sumptuous Cloaths , Houses and Horses , Canonical and Consecrated Germents , and such like Trumperies , with holy Oyl , and Orders , to dazzle and blind your eyes , that you can hardly discern us what we are within our Doublets and Breehces . Ten. Your Lordships have ingenuously satisfied us in your unlikeness unto the approved Scripture Bishops ; now we desire your help in satisfying us concerning your likeness unto , and agreeing with Bishop Bonner , Bishop Gardner , and such like brave fellows of the Romish ▪ Tribe . Bish. Well , we shall satisfie you in this too , for we see there is no getting your money out of your pockets , till you have gotten all our Divinity out of our heads . First , Then we answer , We are the same with them in our Original , State , Places , and Offices , in our Spirits , Natures , Works , Designes , Dignities , and other things : But we must tell you also , That we cannot extort so boundless and unlimitted Power from our Rulers , as they got from theirs , so as to proceed in our designes , and execute our desires upon the generation of the Righteous as they did : We have sought after it , and attempted it with all our might , but cannot obtain it , for our Rulers , we perceive , are grown wiser now , than to trust Male-pates , such Sir Johns as we are , with so much Power as they had , which doth not a little trouble our deep witts ▪ Indeed our Bull is as good as theirs , but he hath not so long Horns , yet we live in hope his Horns may grow longer , for 't is a Young Bull. However , it must not be imputed to our want of craft or subtilty , for we have acted as wisely , or rather as wilily as they did , though , as yet , our success be not as theirs was , because , as we said , our Magistrates are wiser : But we have not laboured altogether in vain , or for nought , for we got upon the backs of some Magistrates long since , and prevailed upon them to establish us in our high Dignities , &c. and to imploy themselves in , and about our service . We have perswaded them by many crafty wiles we used with them , to set their hands , ( we would have had their loyns too ) to our trade , and to assist , as our slaves , in persecuting all such as would not bow to our Idols , and cry , Great is Diana of the Ephesians . We thought , that ( as the world now goes ) we had done enough in procuring Laws , though we set them to be executioners of them ; for we foresaw it would prove but dirty unprofitable work to afflict innocent persons , to please our humors , and that it would make all the Agents about it , very hateful both to God and Men , as is now evident ; we say , we therefore in policy did commend it to such of the Laity as would undertake it , not judging it prudence to dirty our own sacred fingers with it , but with Pilate to wash them , and so proclaim , We are clear of the blood of these men ; and set the prophane Layty ( as we account them ) to pollute their hands with it , and so we have kept our selves clean . But we must not speak so loud , lest these Gentlemen should find out our crafty knavery , and serve our designes no longer . And indeed , had not our chief Magistrates been more tender and careful of their Subjects welfare , than we are of our Flocks ; and had those Gentlemen , whom we imployed in our druggery , been as forward in executing the Laws , which we by subtilty procured , according to our intentions and desires , there had been thousands of Families ruined more than there are : And had we known before , that they would have acted no more violently against the best subjects of our Princes , then they have done , and have ruined them , as we intended , we should have taken the work into our own consecrated hands , nothing doubting but in case we had stained our holy garments , and defiled our sweet hands in their blood , but that his Holiness would have washed us as clean again as a Fish. But we were not so wise as to foresee all events , and what cannot be cured must be endured ; we will let them alone and look to our selves now . But we are not a little troubled that we have set up so many Mills , and have so few Grists come there ; that our Shops have been so long open , and we have had so little Custome . Our Spiritual Officers in our high Courts have little work to do , there they sit till their Noses drop , sighing and wringing their hands . They and we hoped to have allured many fools to our Nets , but they do not come , and some of those few that do come , are grown so wise , that we cannot catch them . For they know that we have but lame Courts , and that if they should own and submit unto our doings ( we acting in our own names , contrary to known Laws , and Kings Supremacy ) they might incur a Premunire ; and therefore when persons cited , do appear before us , they are grown so wise , ( and we cannot ride them like Asses now ) that they presently demand to see our Authority for keeping Courts , and we having none , can shew none ; so they very fairly refuse to answer to our Demands , and put us upon answering them , ( werein we think they do wisely ) and they carry themselves before us as if they were our Cock-mates , so that they do deither Love nor Fear us . Indeed now and then we catch an Owl in our Nets , but not alwayes ; our Trading is so bad , that we are ready to shut up our Shop Windows , and verily we think it would be our wisdom so to do , before the Frost catch us . But to return to our Answer again , from which we diverted a little : We say further , that the aforesaid Bishops and us , are much alike ; As , 1. They constrain and compell all men to their Religion ; so do we . 2. Did they erect a carnal Church , both for Matter and Form ? so do we . 3. Were they hot and restless in their malice against the poor innocent Saints ? so are we too . 4. They made the hearts of the righteous sad , whom God would not have made sad ; so do we . 5. They strengthened the hands of the wicked , that they should not return from their evil way , by promising them Life ; so do we . 6. They belye and slander the Lords People to their Rulers , and provoked and stirred them up , to help them in abusing them ; so do we . 7. They did endeavour to extinguish the Light of the Gospel , that it might not shine into mens hearts ; so do we . 8. They did delight in destroying the Lords Flock , and made slaughter among them , and havock of them ; so do we . 9. They would not suffer the Lord Iesus to appoint his own Worship , but would carve out a Worship for him as they saw good , and enjoyn all to own it , and conform to it , or punish them ; so do we , 10. They did revile and deride the holy Spirit in the Saints ; so do we likewise . We might instance in very many other things , wherein we are as like them as face answereth to face in a glass . But let these suffice to convince you , that we , and they do act by the same spirit , tread in the same steps , and drive on the same ends ; and to tell you the plain truth ( although to our grief ) we have ( by the wisdom of our Rulers ) not been so succesful as they , yet we have acted as vigorously , and with as good a will as they , to accomplish the same ends , and have made our selves as abominable and loathsom as they , and we do look for the same reward that they have had . Ten. You have satisfied us by what you have now said ; shall it please you to inform us what the reason is that you are not made Peers of the Land , that so your Heirs may be instated in some of your Honours and Dignities ; for we suppose you intend to leave them great Estates . Bish. We do so intend , and hope we may effect it ; we do assure you , we do endeavour it , both by hook and by crook ; but as for their Peerage , we cannot tell what to say to that , we fear we shall hardly obtain that ; for we have attempted it , but it would not take , which doth not a little trouble us , but however we shall watch all opportunities to effect it ; but when it was propounded , we met with an unhappy repulse , ( which was as we remember ) that if such an absurdity should be admitted , another as bad would follow , ( viz. ) That some of those Young Peers might be fetcht out of Hospitals , which would not be well , nor for the honour of the honourable Lords and Nobles . But if it should not be obtained , we can satisfie our selves , we have done our utmost to promote it ; and our Heirs must be contented to sit lower . But 't is pitty that so honourable persons as we are , such noble and useful Barons , as we are thought to be , should leave our Children without some Badge of Honour . Ten. If it shall please your Lordships , do you want any Curats , or Herdsmen to serve you ? if you do , we can procure you some . Bish. Yes , we want a dozen or two , pray help us if you can to such a number . Ten. We shall , but pray tell us what manner of Creatures they must be , for we cannot tell if they be quallified to your minds , and will serve your turns . Bish. Very well , we shall tell you briefly : 'T is no great matter what they be , for they shall be blessed with our holy hands , Consecrated with our holy oyl , and be Ordained with , and by our Romish Authority ; all which we received from our holy Father and Mother : Yea , they shall act , and administer in our Names , which are but little less than Wonderful ; they shall also receive a special mark from us in their foreheads , that they may be known to be our brats : They shall partake also of our scraps and leavings , which will be good enough for such fools as will be our slaves , to drudge up and down for us : yea , they shall be at our disposal , and officiate how , where , and as long as we please , and no otherwise : For , if they should prove better than we expected , then we will silence , and turn them out of doors ; but if they prove worser , we will connive at that , for we cannot endure that our herdsmen , and Postilians should be better than we , which are their Lords and Masters : So that if they are Iohn-a-Nokes , and Thomas Stiles , they will serve well enough , provided alwayes ; 1. That they will be our slaves , and subject to our Prelatical Orders . 2. If they can drink and swear , &c. lustily ; if they can rail at , and blaspheme the Lords People , that run not with them into the same excess of riot ; and if they will vigorously and tyrannically execute our Canonical Orders against them . 3. If they will abjure the Covenant , and bind themselves to us , engage to own us for their canonical Masters , and serve us as our Iourney-men . 4. If they have good stomacks and can digest our Old Broth , without vomiting ; for it hath stunk so abominably these thirty years and more , and 't is so stale and sowre , they must be of very strong stomacks , that can without great offence and danger digest it : therefore both you and they must be prepared for it . 5. They must be such as will freely help to bear up our tottering Kingdom of darkness , ( for our Kingdom and Interest cannot stand in light ) they must by their preaching and prayers , railing and deceit , assist to keep us upon our lame Leggs , lest we should fall and break our Consecrated Noses : And indeed we have not any Supporters to bear our selves upon but such rotten ones . Our Kingdom is not built on the Chief-Corner-Stone ; we have little interest in Heaven , nor in the hearts and prayers of the Saints , for we have dealt with them as Saul did with the Witches in Israel ; yea , the holy God is our enemy , and will not stand by to help us in time of need , for we are Gods Enemies , both in our States , Principles and Practices ; yea , our Prayers , which are made by our canonical witts , and sacred hands , and which we call Divine , will not help us upon our Leggs , neither comfort , nor save us in the day of our distress : and we asure you , we did not intend , when we made them , that the use of them should please God , or profit the souls of men . But our ends were to encourage and help an idle dumb Ministry , that by them we might keep souls in ignorance , put out the light in mens Consciences , harden and besot mens minds in our superstition and prophaness , lest that men , by the light of the glorious Gospel should have their eyes opened to see our loathsom nakedness , and thereby we should become more hateful . Wherefore Tenants , you will do us a good turo , if you can commend such unto us , for our sacred hands to consecrate ; but be sure they be so well qualified for us , that they may be like the rest of our Herdsmen : For assuredly , our Herdsmen are almost all such ; if any of them are of a better breed , they will not serve our ends , no matter if they have more of those prelatical qualities , for we can make them divine and holy enough for our use without any cost , and with our prelatical paws , and black-boxes , fit them for our work , and send them into our Vineyards , that by our means are full of briars and thistles , and there they shall abide with scratcht faces : But be ye sure that they be such persons , as are before described , for should they be serious holy persons , that have the Spirit of God , wise , self-denying , humble men , they may prejudice our Interests , and like bold Merchants , help to trip up our heels , as Luther did our Great grandfathers . We have but these three pillars only to bear our fat bellies , heavy Purses , brave Coaches , Lordly Titles , Palaces and Bishopricks upon , which we assure you are worth the keeping , by any means , right or wrong ; for if matters go well on our side , we cannot tell but we may be Cock-mates with Cardinals , yea , possibly some of us with his Holiness ; for we are hastening to them as fast as we can , and had it not been for these Cock-brain Phanaticks , we had been there ere now ; however , we may yet come in good time , if we meet with no bad luck in our way : We will keep our standing sure upon , 1. The Authority of Laws . 2. The point of the Sword. 3. On the Interest and Faithfulness of our right-trusty and beloved Herds-men : And so if they keep their eyes out at their holes , to watch and secure us and our cause when we sleep , we shall not be moved . Ten. Your Fatherhoods have satisfied us , and they are ready yonder at the Common house : your holy Fatherhoods know it well enough . Bish. Are they there , pray wish them to stay till we come to the House . Ten. We shall , for there they are merry and jocund , they curse , roar , and sing , yea , as a high expression of their high respects to you , they very freely drink your healths , until they are dead drunk . Bish. Very well , such fellows , and pot-companions we like well , we wish you could procure us two or three dozen of such Lads , seeing they are so well given , they are likely to be a pack of useful drudges in our Vineyard ; pray get at least three dozen of such , and we shall give you one Red Herring and a Pot of Beer for every dozen that you bring us , for we judge they may be worth so much , seeing they are so well qualified and fitted for our turn . Ten. Shall it please your Reverences to inform us what your Bishopricks with their Appurtenances cost you , because some say , 't is a profitable way of trading ; others again are of another opinion ; we would fain know of you , because you have traded in these wares ? are they dear or cheap , good penny-worths or bad , how goes the market ? Bish. You Country-Small-wits , Dottipoles and Asses , you know not what you say , one of our Bishopricks is worth more than a hundred such Woodcocks as you are ; you will never be able to purchase one , and therefore trouble not your selves nor us about such questions , but pay us our Rents now due , and do your utmost to provide them in due season for time to come , else we shall have very bad bargains , if you do not help us out . But to tell you the truth , our Bishopricks with their appurtenances are so high rated , we cannot certainly tel you what they may cost us , for we have cause to fear , our gains will hardly countervail our losses and expences ; you had need therefore to look well to your business , and pay us our dues exactly , for , for ought we know , our grandfather Iudas had as good a bargain as we are like to have : he sold his Master , whom he looked on to he a poor man , for thirty pieces of silver , and we have sold our souls and bodies too ; yes , we have made merchandize of Christs flock , and the souls of thousands , to get and keep our Bishopricks , and the dignities and advantages belonging to them ; and the Glory , Gospel , and Interest of the Lord Christ , is sold for the purchasing of them . The truth is , we have gotten them with so much wickedness ( and 't is impossible it should be otherwise ) that as King Iames once said , when he was pressed by some to give a vacant Bishoprick to a good man ; Why , saith he , there is no good man will accept of a Bishoprick ; I could never get an honest man to take any such wares ) that we fear , and have may sad thoughts about it , we shall pay for them hereafter , with the Popes , Cardinals , Bishops , and the rest of that Iovial Crew . Ten. Please your holy Fatherhoods not to think so hardly of your selves , your conditions and wayes , for in our opinions , if your Highnesses think you shall pay so dear for them , you will have very hard bargaines , and were better let them alone : Let the Devil and his Curates take them , and trade in those wares that are so dear : yea we think that none but such stout hearted Creatures as you are , durst to trade at such dreadful hazards . But please your Reverences to tell us , why you think you have such bad bargains ? Bish. Besides what we told you before , we can evidence it in many particulars . 1. We do by our bad examples draw many thousands of poor ignorant souls after us , as sheep to the slaughter ; we are some of those blind guides the Scripture speaks of , we are doceitful Comets in our pretended sacred Offices , Lordly Titles , Palaces , Garments and great Attendants , whereby we draw the eyes of many silly souls , to account us Stars : they gaze upon us , and wonder at us , as if we were some rare Birds ; yet they easily see our pride and ambition , our covetousness , extortion , luxury , wantonness , hypocrisie , superstition , idolatry , baseness , filthyness , vanity , ends , and designs ; and they doubt not but that they may follow our steps in peace and safety , while they hear us pretend to holyness , and cry up our selves as holy Fathers , spiritual Pastors , wise and learned men , and they see we have a Form of Godliness , and practise a pompous and gaudy Religion , to make use of the Name of God , and Christ ; thus are they hardned and encouraged to go on in their evil ways without checks of Conscience , because we embolden them by our example , whom they judge wiser and better . So that it was not without cause we told you , we feared hard bargains of our Bishopricks . 2. We do not only cause men to erre by our pernicious and prophane examples , but we do all we can to shut up the kingdom of heaven against poor souls , by extinguishing the Light , and putting out the Candles that should direct men to eternal Life : we hating the Light ourselves , ( being as Lord-Bishops , Children of Darkness , cannot endure that others should have Light. We were restless in our wily workings until we had turned out of Christs Vineyard such as he had sent thither , and were true , Lights , and we saw many walking in the light to Heaven by their teachings , which we did greatly envy . Besides , we shut men out of Heaven , and Communion with God , by our forbidding them to draw nigh to God in his own wayes of Worship . We were the men that shut up that door likewise , and are not a little troubled that our wise Rulers , who seeing it their interests have conniv'd and wink'd so much at the Meetings of good men , and th●● that door is so open as it is this day ▪ indeed our Rulers would never have disturbed them ; but through our lying and dissembling inst gations , we possessed them with our Charms , that such Meetings would be very dangerous to Church and State , although we knew it to be false , and we have since been proved Lyans : and that our designes were to keep poor souls from happiness , and to secure our cursed Interests . 3. We are the great countenancer● and encouragers of all iniquity and prophanness in others , as well as in our selves , so that it may be truly said , That from us is wickedness gone forth into all the Land. Our Herds-men have much of their wickedness from us ; they seeing us such our selves , who hate real godliness in some , and like and approve of evil in all , and that as Lord-Bishops , we cannot well do otherwise ; we never reprove any sin , but we reprove godliness , mock and deride that , yea we constrain men to do worses than their Fathers , as you shall see anon ; and undoubtedly all the abominable swearing , uncleanness , gluttony , drunkenness , blasphemy , oppression , and all sorts of villanies will be laid at our doors at last ; by which it appears that our Merchandize is likely to make us Bankrupts . 4. In the next place , We are the great impoverishers of the Nation , we stop the trading of the Land , and that among other wayes , we get in and damn up , the money of the Nation in our Coffers , wherewith men should Trade , and that to maintain our voluptuousness , enrich our Families , and buy sacred Garments : by means whereof the poor of the Nation are ready to perish for want of bread , because we have blasted the trading stock of the Nation ( wherewith they should be imployed ) with our consecrated hands , mouths , bellies , and backs , and we are assured that thousands of almost starved Families , do curse us as the only instrumental causes of their ruine ; besides the several thousands of Ministers , whom we have endeavoured with all our might to starve to death . All which is as clear as the Sun at noon day ; for , before our erection , how did our Traders , Merchants , and Farmers thrive in , and by their labours ; but what a pittiful case are they in now ? Our tongues , though sacred , cannot express how much the Nation hath suffered by our wickedness . So that upon the whole , we are the destroyers both of the souls and bodies of all sorts of persons ; and we may well enough fear what the end will prove of our trading in those commodities . 5. You may behold yet greater wickedness in our practises , as Lord-Bishops ; we do dethrone the Lord Jesus Christ , the Lord of glory ; and as much as in us lies , rob him of his Lordly Authority and Power , which he received from God , upon his dying for sinners , which was to ordain and appoint the Worship that God should have from his subjects , both the matter and manner of it ; and that he should enact and ordain such Laws as he saw good , for keeping his subjects in subjection to him ; as also the matter and form of his Houses and Temples , with their Officers and Duties . But we have endeavoured to divest and cheat him of all his glory and authority therein , by setting up our posts by his posts ( as his enemies of old did ) our own Worship , Churches , Officers and Discipline ; commanding and enjoyning Christs subjects to leave his Laws , Worship and Order , and conform , and bow down to ours , punishing and vexing such as will not reject Christ and serve us ; that dare not be such flat Rebels and Traitors to Jesus Christ , as to own and submit their souls and consciences to our Baubles and Images , our usurpations and tyranny . 6. We are yet worser , if worser can be , and that is to constrain persons to lying , swearing , perjury , oppressing and persecuting ; as if it were not enough that they practise so , but they must be bound to it ; and if this be not to draw iniquity with cartropes , we do not know what is . To these abominations we compel our Curates or Herds-men , when we send them forth into our Vineyards , and breath on them , ( as we falsly tell them ) the holy Ghost ; although in their practises it soon appears , to be the evil spirit . They must engage to submit and conform unto our Prelatical Canons , Decrees and Orders , and to affirm , That our Church and Lordly Discipline , is according to the Word of God , how notoriously false , and contrary soever it be to the Word of God. And they must bind themselves to execute our canonical or tyrannical Laws , in oppressing , vexing and persecuting such good men as cannot bend to our Bows , and conform to our filthy wayes , against their knowledge and consciences ; so we first tye up our Herds-mens Noses to the posts , and secure them to us , as our bondmen , that we may use them at our pleasure , as we do our Asses ; and the said Herds-men go forth , and make as many fools as they can to become their slaves and asses also . Moreover , as we do compel our Herds-men to take our iron yoke on their necks , to keep them close to our drudgery , so we deal with our other Church-Officers , the Church-wardens , we constrain them to swear without fear or wit , to make our selves merry with it , to see what Asses we make of some of them , how we conjure them to stand still , while we leap on their backs , and when we have mounted them , we do kick and spur-gale them till we draw blood . We enjoyn them to swear ( under the penalty of being accursed as black as our breeches , by our Lordly Authority ) to do that which is impossible for them to do , as you may see in the needless number of particulars , asserted in the Church-wardens Oath , and the Book of Articles . Besides , if it were possible to be kept , yet not to keep it well ; for they must swear to sin with a high hand against the most high God , the Lord Christ , and the souls of men ; to cause all to be punished with our Bull , that conform not unto our superstitious Decrees . So that if the said Church-wardens do swear to do what they are there injoyned , and do not do it , they ruine their souls by gross perjury ; if they observe and do what they swear to , then they endeavour to destroy their own and others souls another way ; all which may easily be seen in the Book it self where the said Oath is , and all the particulars of our prelatical will and pleasure , set forth by our Authority , conrary to the known Laws of the Land. And now and then we catch such pittiful dunces in our Trap , and make them swear what we please against sense and reason , and then we laugh at their follyes , and reproach them for their labour . Here you may see unparallel'd wickedness , there is hardly the like to be found among the Heathens . Who can but blush at this villany ? by these Bishop-like practices , we destroy men with our sacred hands . Ten. Pray tell us what your ends are in making and imposing such an impossible , horrid Oath on Church-wardens ? Bish. We shall tell you briefly . 1. 'T is to make all men our vassals and slaves . 2. That we may have the company of many with us hereafter ; for we being great persons , are loth to go alone , or with few attendants ; and that we may be used the ●ore civilly and kindly , we bringing multitudes with us . 3. To enrich our Courts , and to keep our Agents there from idleness , and catching of Colds lest they being disabled from serving us , we should be without servants , and falling sick we should be at expence to recover them again . 4. That we may have their reverence and homage , and see their naked bald pates . 5. That we may keep them in blindness , lest their eyes should be open to see our cloven feet . 6. That we may thereby strengthen and uphold our Kingdom , Honours and Greatness . 7. That we may boast of , and rejoyce in our good success , as Fowlers , when they have gotten many Birds in their nets , and caught a good gain ( as they say ) they triumph in the thoughts of their art and success ; so do we , when we come home and consider how many Asses we have caught in our artificial canonical snares . So that we do all we can to ruine poor souls , and we have reason to fear , that there have thousands perisht by our means , whereby it appears that we shall have hard bargains in our Bishopricks . 7. We have the ruine of many fatherless Children and Widows , crying for Vengeance against us . For we are they that have undone men causelesly ; to fulfil our lusts , and promote our interests , we have turned many families out of doors , to famish with hunger , and perish with thirst ; by our sacred hands are they destitute , afflicted , tormented ; we have snatched the meat out of their mouthes , since we made them Widows and Orphans , insomuch that many Families have no meat for their Bellies , or cloathing for their Backs , through our oppression , pride and covetousness . And as these cry against us , so do many prisoners also , whom we have cruelly imprisoned , and drove like Beasts into filthy nasty Goals , there to remain during our pleasure without Bail or Main-prize : For we were not satisfied in cursing them with our black Bull , as black as Ink , but have set them upon our Bulls Horns , to be tormented . Many have lien in Prison ( whom we drove there , three , four , five or six years , for meet trifles . For , ( Tenants ) you must know that we have two slaughter-houses , the one for the Soul , and the other for the Body . The Soul slaughter-house is our Churches way of Worship , Ceremonies , Orders , and Discipline ; the other is the garnished Palace of Felons and Murderers : And such as cannot in Conscience be drawn into the Soul-slaughterhouse , there to prophane the holy Name and Word of God , and promote the ruine of their souls ; we do with all rigour and violence drive to the other ; that so we may not fail either of destroying their Souls or Bodies , which we most vigorously prosecute . Besides , there be some fled from us into forreign parts , through fear of our wicked hands , and others that by our means have been banished , and live in exile , all which cry for vengeance from Heaven against us ▪ So that we are like to pay very dear for our Dignities and Bishopricks . Besides , we have driven , and with all our might endeavoureed to drive all our Kings best Subjects , such as are the diligent and profitable Traders in the Nations , and that are most useful to assist their lawful Rulers , out of the Land , as our work was to ruine all , both Rulers and ruled . 8. We have and still do all we can to root out all persons in Church and State , that have any real worth in them , either for God or man ; that they may not have any Office , Power , or Interest there . Such as cannot comply with us in our hateful wayes and interests ; for we do loath all that have any acquaintance with God , or that are accounted holy and serious men , and desert our Prelatical interests and pernitious wayes : But that which doth prety well quiet our Consciences in such practices is , that 't is no new thing ; for we do in this and other of our wayes , tread in the steps of our infamous Ancestors of the Papal Church , and we are resolved to dissent from them as little as we can , not knowing how soon we may be perfectly joyned together with them in all points and practices : Yea , we are greatly comforted , and it doth not a little rejoyce us , that we have gotten so many into our netts , who were once against us , yea , did solemnly swear against us , who are now the great supporters of our Hierarchy and Interest ; who can swear backwards and forwards , as times will permit ; who make their Oaths , Covenants and Professions , only a Cloak to serve their carnal Interests : For we think 't is more for fear of us , than love to us or our wayes ; and indeed if we could find that they were real and hearty in their joyning with us , and not for filthy lucre , it would more fully refresh our tormented Consciences than it doth : But we fear they are but belly and time-servers , as well as we our selves . It is their fear of us , and love to good Livings , that makes them do what they do ; and we have much ado with some of them , who have not with us , wholly buried their Consciences , to bring them to our Bow , and to make them own us , and do our drudgery that we enjoyn them ; they act like dull and tired Horses , that must be spurred on to serve our designs : We are fain to fill up our Vineyard with such Asses , and we spread our nets every where to catch such Owls , and when we caught them , we are afraid to trust them , for we think that such as can be false to God , and men of their own Profession , so as to forswear themselves at our pleasure , will not long be stedfast and honest with us . But we will watch them , and goar some of them with our Bulls Horns , and make the rest the more circumspect and dutiful to us . You may see that these Phanatick Birds are loth to be catch'd in our nets , for we could catch but one of them with our allurements to accept of a Bishoprick , to make up the jovial crew of Lord-Bishops ; and we fear that that Bishop that once swore against us , will drive but a beggarly trade in Norwich Stuffs , and that he will lose himself at last , yea , we do know that his credit is generally crackt already , and we guess that his Conscience is almost bankrupt before now . But we shall leave him to answer for himself , to him that will shortly call him to account for his perjury , and other sins which he is notoriously guilty of in complying with us : For he hath perswaded and seduced more to our wicked ways , then ten of us that had never his interest , fame and repute , which is now buried as well as ours . And as we rejoyce that we have gotten such birds to receive our Prelatical unction , &c. So we rejoyce in that our Journey-men have got so many Phanaticks to hear them in their Parish-Churches , who come there more through fear of us than God ; and to avoid our Horns , more than to avoid the displeasure of God. We know they do but dissemble with God and men , in their being present at our Worship , and that they neither love us nor our wayes : So that we affright them to act contrary to their Consciences , that they may avoid our corporal slaughter-houses ; and in this we do rejoyce : For as we are grieved when Christ catches any of our subjects in his net , so we are glad when we catch any of Christs in ours ; and we labour night and day , that we may have and keep more followers of us in the broad way to Hell , than Jesus Christ hath in the strait way to Heaven , Moreover , it is notoriously evident , That our states and ways are very bad , wicked and hateful , and no way pleasing unto God ; in that we have none to pitty and help us , to love , comfort , and pray for us , for the prosperity and happiness of us and our posterities ; but ( for the most part , the vilest of men ) such as are our Off-spring , and ill-begotten Sons , such as have our qualities and Wolfish natures , and have neither interest in Heaven , nor in the hearts of the Saints ; none but such as love and serve us for their bellies , as we our selves do serve God , and our Rulers ; they are our very image , and look , speak and walk like us , and how can such help us ? Are we superstitious ? so are they . Are we dumb doggs , idle shepherds , prophane and cruel Oppressors ? so are they too . Are we worldlings , covetous wretches and wine bibbers ? so are they likewise . Are we haters of God and good men , of the power and light of grace , and the Gospel ? so are they also . Are we proud ambitious wretches , time-servers , lyars and dissemblers ? so are they likewise . Are we such as draw and drive others to iniquity ? So do they . Have we Whores foreheads that refuse to be ashamed ? So have they also . So that you may easily see and know what the Fathers are by their Children , and what the Children are by their Fathers . Would you see the pretty Faces and Complexions of Bishops , but cannot obtain the sight of their reverend Nubal-faces , being denyed access to their lofty Honours , by reason of the great distance that is between the Laity , and these Ghostly Fathers ? be pleased to look on our Children , we mean , our Heard-men , and you may know us as well as if you had seen our Canonical Faces ; for they are begotten , taught and brought up by us , and will not vary from us in any thing , so long as we and they can hold up our Interests , and make advantages of each other . But they are not one 〈◊〉 honester than we are , not fit to be trusted ; and we fear , if the tide of our Fortunes should turn , and the Sun shine on the other side of the Hedge , and we not able to gratifie them any longer , that they will help to promote us to Tyburn , notwithstanding they are our Sons . Yea , our case is very sad , for we are wholly rejected of God , and all good men ; or , we have rejected God , and persecuted them : and they cannot but judge , but that we our selves are the Brats of the Whore of Babylon , that the Devil is our Father , and Rome our Mother ; and to tell you the truth , we do judge so too : But let it not be spoken in Gath , for then you will marr our Markets . And to tell you the truth , Our Consciences do rise out of their graves , appear to us , plague and torment us , at some certain times , that we are affraid of them , and cannot endure to hear or see them , for they look like damned Ghosts , as if the Devil had the keeping of them ; and though we do all we can to bribe and conjure them from us , yet they will speak and vex us : They present unto us the many cries , sighs and tears , the hungry bellies , and naked backs of thousands of fatherless Children , and Widows that we have made ; the griefs , sorrows and miseries of many poor Prisoners and banished Saints , that we have laid in Prisons , and caused to be Banished . They tell us of our horrid Perjury , Superstition and Idolatry , and other abominable wickednesses , which we daily practise without Repentance . But their voices are smartest and loudest against us , for persecuting and driving away the Gospel from men , and for damning many souls daily ; they bring the dreadfull cries of damned souls to us , and lay the guilt at our doors , and tell us plainly ( and we cannot deny it ) that we sent them blindfold to Hell ; that we did shut up the Kingdom of Heaven against them , took away the Light of the Gospel from them , and hardned their hearts in sin , that they had not been there but for our wicked practices . So that do what we can to remove these Fiends from us , they will visit and dogg us up and down . We do endeavour to stop their mouths with the best arguments we have , as with our sacred Orders , spiritual Titles , holy Garments , high and lofty Places and Honours , great Revenues and Attendants , the examples of our reverend Romish Ancestors , from Phocus his days , until the year 1641. and also the many Laws made to keep us in the saddle . But all these Arguments are too short to help and comfort us ; yea , we fear his Holiness's Pardon cannot stop the mouths of our roa●ing Consciences . Besides , we miscarry and are blasted in all we do , we are the most unhappy Statesmen , we will still be medling with State affaires , but without good success , our Counsels are such as God doth curse ; so that if our Rulers did but know , and observe us , how pernitious and mischievous we are to their Counsels and Government , they would spue us out of their presence . For were it not for us , they would be much more happy and prospe●ous in their publick affairs ; more quiet and comfortable in their Government , more generally beloved of their Subjects ; for we do divide the hearts of Princes from their Subjects , and Subjects hearts from them , by our pride , extortion , luxury , superstition , persecution and oppression . So that it may be truly said , There are hardly any publick evils or miscarriages in the State , wher● we bear sway , but we are the immediate Authors and causers of them . Insomuch as you know it is a vulgar Proverb , when any evil or cross happens , to say , The Bishops foot was there . In fine , We cannot live but in troubled Waters , and therefore believe it , there is no Satyrical Invective Printed and Published , that thunders out the Peoples Groans and Burdens , whether Spiritual or Civil , but we are the Authors of it , ( though like our Brethren on good Friday , we fetch blood at our own heels in so doing ) and all to possess Supream Authority that the People are disaffected to the Government , and therefore ought to be vassalized ; thus prevent we a right understanding betwixt our Rulers and the good People of the Land , in whose amicable Tranquillity , were it not for these cursed Stratagems , our would unavoidably period . By this time we hope all your Cases and Doubts are resolved , and we promise you , we have taken paines with you , yea a great deal more than ever we shall do again . Now we hope you will pay us the monies you owe us , that we may suck out all the sweetness and comfort we can from it , to support our miserable fainting souls ; we have need enough of it , although we have many thousand pounds lying by us ; for if you do believe what we have told you , you cannot but conclude we are the miserablest men upon earth , and have nothing to support us but such earthly things ; you poor Country-men are in a far better case then we , for your sins are not so great as ours , who are your holy Fathers , you have not so many to curse you , and cry for vengeance against you , nor so much innocent blood to account for as we have , neither shall you be plunged under so great vengeance in Hell as we , for you sin not against so much Light and Mercy as we . O Tenants , were it not for Hell and the Wrath of God , what brave happy men were we , could we make any shift to escape Hell , we should be a more Jovial Crew than we are ; we would not at all trouble our selves about sinning , were it not for suffering that follows ; sin troubles us not , but we are terrified at the thoughts of lying in hell fire eternally . Ten. We shall now dismiss your Lordships as soon as you have resolved us this one Case more , which is , Whether Tenants be bound to pay their Rents unless they be able ? Bish. Yes Tenants , you must pay us our Rents , the whole sum to a groat , though you are not bound to do so to others , because we are spiritual persons , your holy and ghostly Fathers , and if you detain rents from us after they are due , you are guilty of Sacriledge , you rob the Church , and that 's an unpardonable sin in our spiritual Courts ; whatever sin else we can pardon , yet be assured we neither can nor will pardon Sacriledge , especially against our selves ; and if you be found guilty in our spiritual Courts , and held there under our black curse , you cannot so long be pardoned in Heaven . You know we teach you , that whatever , or whosoever we bind on Earth , is bound also in Heaven ; and whose sins we remit , they are there remitted also . Therefore we do not care nor mind how , or where you get the money , but we tell you that we must and will have it , else you know what will follow , if you be such fools to believe it . Ten. Well , we shall bring your rents next week , for we will not trouble your Lordships to carry it home , for we judge it will be too heavy for you to cary so far , and think your eye-sight is much decayed with continual looking on money , so that you cannot test right , we fear you 'l mistake a shilling for six pence , therefore we will send it ready told . Bish. Very well , we shall expect it then , pray fail nor . But Tenants , pray tell us briefly , what repute have we amongst men ? what do they report of us their spiritual Lords ? do they speak honourably of us , or contemptibly ? do men reverence us or not ? we would know how the Country doth stand affected to us , our Hierarchy and proceedings , pray inform us , for we know you can if you will. Ten. We shall tell you what we do certainly know , at least a little of it . First , We do assure you , that you are generally loathed and abhorred ; there are not any in the Country , whither rich or poor , that do at all regard you , or so much as own you ; no , their hearts are set against you , as against the enemies of God , the Gospel and Nation , and the immediate causes of the ruine and destruction both of their Souls and Bodies . They do conclude , and are not afraid to speak it , that you are the greatest of all external judgments and plagues , the heaviest and saddest judgements that God in justice punisheth Kingdoms withal : For when Nations and Kingdoms rebel against God , grow weary of his yoak and service , slight and contemn his Gospel , and Gospel-Ministers , abuse their Christian Liberty , grow formal and cold in their duties to God , wax wanton with Mercies , and quarrel with each other , loath the honey-combes of blessed Ordinances , and neglect to walk humbly with their God : then God in wisdom and justice sends them such task-masters as you are , to scourge and afflict them , to take away their light and priviledges from them , to turn their day into Night , their glory into shame , their joy into sorrow , and their liberty into bondage , their milk and honey into gall and wormwood , the holy and soul-nourishing Ordinances , into Superstition and humane Inventions , to ruine , or at least to wast and impoverish their estates , and every way to punish vex and torment them , as the Egyptians did the Israelites . So that they do believe , that you are every way as vile and abominable as you have confessed and declared your selves to be , and that you are the rods of Gods anger and hot displeasure against them , as the Assyrians were to the Iews . Yea , we do assure you , that although many do cringe to you through fear , and give you flattering Titles , yet they loath and abhor you : You are the eye-sore of the Nations , grievous to all Creatures excepting a few that gain by you ; you are like the Prophets vile figgs , and are accounted the miserablest men upon earth . Did you but believe how you stink in all mens nostrils , you would hardly come abroad but keep close in your Cells ; for the children in the streets loath the very sight of you , and can hardly be perswaded that you are English men , but that you came from Rome or Turky , and were born Turks or Jews . We are all perswaded , that as God set you up in wrath and vengeance to the Nations , for their high provocations , so he will keep you up until his wrath be appeased by repentance ; and that as soon as God shall return to us in tender mercy , as he did to Jerusalem , and pardon us , that he will immediately root you out , and cast you forth as dung upon the face of the earth , and that you shall be more debased than ever you were exalted ; for as you are the staff of Gods indignation , to punish us for our iniquities , so when you have done your work , God will burn his Staff , and you shall not escape unless you do speedily repent in dust and ashes . You do now triumph and rejoyce while Gods pretious redeemed Saints do mourn , but saith Christ , Their sorrow shall be turned into joy ; but you , that are their Oppressours and Persecutors , shall howl for vexation of spirit , and leave your Names for a curse unto his Chosen . They do now weep in secret for your pride , they cry for vengeance upon Babylon , and we are sure when it comes , that you shall not escape . You have turned many of the Lords People out of the Land ; but be you assured you shall be turned into hell without mercy , as having shewed no mercy to them ; your Sun of prosperity is setting , your day is hastening upon you , and as a snare shall it overtake you . Oh consider how much blood you have to account for , what a lamentable and distressed case will you be in when thousands of souls shall rise up and witness against you , and say . These are the men that destroyed us , these are the cruel ▪ Butchers that murdered our souls and Bodies , that ruined our families and estates , that made themselves drunk with the blood of Christs flock , that did cruelly oppress them , violently persecute them , and like the Babylonians of old to the Iews , malitiously rob and spoile them of their spiritual Pastures , and heavenly food ; that caused them to be dragged through the streets like wild Beasts , only for their peaceable worshiping of God according to his will , and refusing to conform to your hateful and pernitious wayes . You condemn the Jews for persecuting Christ and his Prophets , and say , ( to blind the eyes of men ) That you judge they were in an errour , that you would not have done so , had you possessed their places in those dayes , ( as the Jews in Christs time said concerning their predecessors ) and yet you do the same thing , as appears in your ingenuous confession . You tyrannize and lord it over their consciences , imprison , ruine and murder such as dare not bow down to your Idols , and own you for their ghostly Fathers . They say , If you are not the natural Bratts of the whore of Babylon , if you are not proud and malitious persecutors of Christ in his members , for godliness sake , that there were never any such in the world . You are the vilest and most hateful persons under heaven , and many hundred thousands of the Inhabitants of these Lands , do greatly long for , and rejoyce in the faith and hope of the near approach of the day of your destruction ; yea thousands of prayers are put up to Heaven daily , either for your Conversion or utter Ruine . All sorts of men do loath and abhor you , as the plagues of God , as the fire-brands of Hell , as a most loathsom Crew , and generation of Vipers ; and we do greatly comfort our selves that it will not be long ere God will spew you out of his mouth . Bish. Oh Tenants , you have told us a sad story , for although we knew our selves to be as bad , and worse than hath been declared , yet we hoped that the common people did not take notice of it , but we fear they do , and that we shall not be reverenced by them . Alas Tenants , what shall we do ? we shall go home with heavy hearts , for if we are so loathsom and abominable in the Nations , surely the wrath of God is heavy upon us , and we are likely to perish quickly ; O what shall we do for comfort in this our great distress ? Ten. We advise you send to your Cathedrals , and thence summon all your Organists , Choristers and singing Boys , and from amid them select the most expert for the Base , Tennor and Trebble , then furnish them with the best Organs and Anthems , yea be sure you forget not good store of merry Catches and Roundelayes , exactly fitted to chant out your mad exploits , and great services you have done your master all your Apprentiships ; take also your pockets full of good Angels , that Catholick Medicine , and two or three hundred Tun of the best Canary ( 'cause you will need a Cup of good liquor there more than you did when you pleaded so hard with us for it ) With this Present if you procure not a plenary Indulgence , yea what Place or Office you like in Pluto's Court , ( who will without doubt , with all his infernal Fiends dance a Iigg for joy of your jolly Company ) We know not what to say , but farewel Bishops , farewel Plagues o' th Nations . Bish. You have cheerd us a little with your grave advice , which we think is very good and seasonable , and we promise you we will get a Convocation shortly to consider of it , what is best to be done . But pray tell us , if when our glass is run out , and the Devil whom we serve , sends for us to Hell , will you be pleased to attend and wait on us there , in case we should want you ? Ten. No , we will see you advanced to Tybourn first : But you need not fear , you shall have attendants enough , for those Devils that now do imploy you in your work , and wait on you daily , will honourably conveigh you into Hell , with all your high honours and good works ; where we shall leave you , hoping no more to be troubled with you . Bish. We charge you not to speak one word to any body what we have discoursed of , for you will quite undo us if you should ; and be sure if you do , we shall slap your Bumkins for you , or send you to the Devil with our Bulls Horns . Ten. We shall mind what you say . Bish. Farewel Tenants . Ten. Fare you well Sirs . FINIS .