Ytota
50
Mrs. Raffles
John Kendrick Bangs, Albert Levering
ALBERT
LEVERING


AL , /?* JO
HARVARD COLLEGE
LIBRARY

From the
GEORGE NICHOLS FUND
Bequeathed by
JOHN T. W. NICHOLS
In memory of his father
GEORGE NICHOLS
Class of 1828
FOR ENGLISH LITERATURE

















Mrs. Raffle
Being the Adventures of
An Amateur Crackswoman
Narrated by
Bunny
Edited by
John Kendrick Bangs
Illustrated by
Albert Levering

New York and London
Harper & Brothers Publishers
1905


I
/ ( HARVARD*
lUNIVERSITY
LIBRARY
DEC 31 1941
Copyright, 1905, by Harper & Brothers.
All rights reserved.
Published October, 1905.


Contents
CHAPTER PAGE
I. The Adventure op the Herald
Personal I
II. The Adventure op the New-
port Villa 14
III. The Adventure op Mrs. Gas-
ter's Maid 28
IV. The Pearl Rope of Mrs. Gush-
ington-Andrews .... 42
V. The Adventure of the Steel
Bonds 56
VI. The Adventure op the Fresh-
Air Fund 69
VII. The Adventure of Mrs. Rock-
erbilt's Tiara 84
VIII. The Adventure of the Car-
negie Library 99
IX. The Adventure of the Hold-
Up 115
X. The Adventure op Mrs. Shadd's
Musicale 132
XI. The Adventure op Mrs. Inn-
itt's Cook 150
XII. The Last Adventure .... 165
iii





Illustrations
"'IT'S FINE, BUNNY,' SHE CRIED" Frontispiece
"THIS I WOULD SELL TO THE SUF-
FERING POOR" Facing p. 4
"THE WHOLE CONTENTS AND THE
PLATTER AS WELL FELL AT
MY FEET" "12
"HER SLIGHT LITTLE FIGURE CON-
VULSED WITH GRIEF" ... " 40
"AND THEN THERE CAME A RIP-
PING SOUND" "52
"i, OF COURSE, DID NOT TELL HEN-
RIETTE OF EIGHT BEAUTIES I
HAD KEPT OUT" "54
"'AFTER WHICH HE WILL COME TO
NEWPORT'" "62
"MR. BOLIVAR WAS DULY IMPRESS-
ED WITH THE EXTENT OF HEN-
RIETTA'S FORTUNE" .... " 66
ONE OF THE BENEFICIARIES AT
PALM BEACH "82


Illustrations
IT WAS NOT ALWAYS EASY TO
GET THE RIGHT LIGHT" . . Facing p. 90
ALL WAS AS HENRIETTE HAD
FORETOLD" "94
'IP YOU WANTED A LAKE, MR.
HIGGINBOTHAM, I '" ... " IIO
AS KEEN AND HIGH-HANDED A
PERFORMANCE AS I EVER WIT-
NESSED" "124
on her way to early church
i waylaid norah" ... " 162
henriette was testing the
fifty - thousand - dollar
piano" "172
my misery is deep but i am
buoyed up by one great
HOPE" "178


Mrs. Raffle





Mrs. Raffles
i
THE ADVENTURE OF THE HERALD
PERSONAL
THAT I was in a hard case is best
attested by the fact that when
I had paid for my Sunday Herald
there was left in my purse just one
tuppence - ha'penny stamp and two
copper cents, one dated 1873, the
other 1894. The mere incident that
at this hour eighteen months later
I can recall the dates of these coins
should be proof, if any were needed, of
the importance of the coppers in my
eyes, and therefore of the relative
scarcity of funds in my possession.


Mrs. Raffles
Raffles was dead—killed as you may
remember at the battle of Spion Kop
—and I, his companion, who had
never known want while his deft
fingers were able to carry out the
plans of that insinuating and mar-
vellous mind of his, was now, in the
vernacular of the American, up against
it. I had come to the United States,
not because I had any liking for that
country or its people, who, to tell the
truth, are too sharp for an ordinary
burglar like myself, but because with
the war at an end I had to go some-
where, and English soil was not safely
to be trod by one who was required
for professional reasons to evade the
eagle eye of Scotland Yard until the
Statute of Limitations began to have
some bearing upon his case. That
last affair of Raffles and mine, where-
in we had successfully got away with
the diamond stomacher of the duch-
ess of Herringdale, was still a live
matter in British detective circles, and


The Herald Personal
the very audacity of the crime had
definitely fastened the responsibility
for it upon our shoulders. Hence it
was America for me, where one could
be as English as one pleased with-
out being subject to the laws of
his Majesty, King Edward VII.,
of Great Britain and Ireland and
sundry other possessions upon which
the sun rarely if ever sets. For
two years I had led a precarious
existence, not finding in the land of
silk and money quite as many of
those opportunities to add to the sum
of my prosperity as the American
War Correspondent I had met in the
Transvaal led me to expect. Indeed,
after six months of successful lectur-
ing on the subject of the Boers before
various lyceums in the country, I was
reduced to a state of penury which
actually drove me to thievery of the
pettiest and most vulgar sort. There
was little in the way of mean theft
that I did not commit. During the

3


Mrs. Raffles
coal famine, for instance, every day
passing the coal-yards to and fro, I
would appropriate a single piece of
the precious anthracite until I had
come into possession of a scuttleful,
and this I would sell to the suffering
poor at prices varying from three
shillings to two dollars and a half—
a precarious living indeed. The only
respite I received for six months was
in the rape of the hansom-cab, which
I successfully carried through one
bitter cold night in January. I hired
the vehicle at Madison Square and
drove to a small tavern on the Boston
Post Road, where the icy cold of the
day gave me an excuse for getting
my cabby drunk in the guise of
kindness. Him safely disposed of in
a drunken stupor, I drove his jaded
steed back to town, earned fifteen
dollars with him before daybreak, and
then, leaving the cab in the Central
Park, sold the horse for eighteen
dollars to a snow-removal contractor








The Herald Personal
over on the East Side. It was humil-
iating to me, a gentleman born, and
a partner of so illustrious a person as
the late A. J. Raffles, to have to stoop
to such miserable doings to keep body
and soul together, but I was forced to
confess that, whatever Raffles had
left to me in the way of example, I
was not his equal either in the con-
ception of crime or in the nerve to
carry a great enterprise through. My
biggest coups had a way of failing at
their very beginning — whirh was
about the only blessing I enjoyed,
since none of them progressed far
enough to imperil my freedom, and,
lacking confederates, I was of course
unable to carry through the profitable
series of abductions in the world of
High Finance that I had contem-
plated. Hence my misfortunes, and
now on this beautiful Sunday morn-
ing, penniless but for the coppers and
the postage - stamp, with no break-
fast in sight, and, fortunately enough,
5


Mrs. Raffles
permit of so remarkable a coinci-
dence.
"I will go to Newport at once," I
cried, rising and pacing the floor
excitedly, for I had many times, in
cursing my loneliness, dreamed of
Henriette, and had oftener and oftener
of late found myself wondering what
had become of her, and then the
helplessness of my position burst
upon me with full force. How should
I, the penniless wanderer in New
York, get to Bolivar Lodge at New-
port? It takes money in this sordid
country to get about, even as it does
in Britain—in sorry truth, things in
detail differ little whether one lives
under a king or a president; poverty
is quite as hard to bear, and free
passes on the railroad are just as
scarce.
"Curses on these plutocrats!" I
muttered, as I thought of the railway
directors rolling in wealth, running
trains filled with empty seats to and
8


The Herald Personal
from the spot that might contain my
fortune, and I unable to avail myself
of them for the lack of a paltry dollar
or two. But suddenly the thought
flashed over me — telegraph collect.
If it is she, she will respond at once.
And so it was that an hour later
the following message was ticked over
the wires:
"Personal to-day's Herald received.
Telegraph railway fare and I will go to
you instantly. (Signed), Bunny."
For three mortal hours I paced the
streets feverishly awaiting the reply,
and at two-thirty it came, discon-
certing enough in all conscience:
"If you are not a bogus Bunny you will
know how to raise the cash. If you are a
bogus Bunny I don't want you."
It was simple, direct, and convinc-
ing, and my heart fluttered like the
drum-beat's morning call to action
the moment I read it.
9


Mrs. Raffles
"By Jove!" I cried. "The woman
is right, of course. It must be Hen-
riette, and I'll go to her if I have to
rob a nickel-in-the-slot machine."
It was as of old. Faint-hearted I
always was until some one gave me
a bit of encouragement. A word of
praise or cheer from Raffles in the old
days and I was ready to batter down
Gibraltar, a bit of discouragement and
a rag was armor-plate beside me.
"'If you are not a bogus Bunny
you will know,'" I read, spreading the
message out before me. "That is to
say, she believes that if I am really my-
self I can surmount the insurmount-
able. Gad! I'll do it." And I set
off hot-foot up Fifth Avenue, hoping
to discover, or by cogitation in the
balmy air of the spring-time after-
noon, to conceive of some plan to re-
lieve my necessities. But, somehow or
other, it wouldn't come. There were
no pockets about to be picked in the
ordinary way. I hadn't the fare for
10


The Herald Personal
a ride on the surface or elevated cars,
where I might have found an oppor-
tunity to relieve some traveller of his
purse, and .as for snatching such a
thing from some shopper, it was Sun-
day and the women who would have
been an easy prey on a bargain-day
carried neither purse nor side-bag
with them. I was in despair, and
then the pealing bells of St. Jondy's,
the spiritual home of the multi-mill-
ionaires of New York, rang out the
call to afternoon service. It was like
an invitation—the way was clear.
My plan was laid in an instant, and
it worked beyond my most hopeful
anticipations. Entering the church,
I was ushered to a pew about half-
way up the centre aisle—despite my
poverty, I had managed to keep my-
self always well-groomed, and no one
would have guessed, to look at my
faultless frock-coat and neatly creased
trousers, at my finely gloved hand and
polished top-hat, that my pockets held


Mrs. Raffles
scarcely a brass farthing. The service
proceeded. A good sermon on the
Vanity of Riches found lodgment in
my ears, and then the supreme mo-
ment came. The collection-plate was
passed, and, gripping my two pennies
in my hand, I made as if to place them
in the salver, but with studied awk-
wardness I knocked the alms-platter
from the hands of the gentleman who
passed it. The whole contents and
the platter as well fell at my feet, and
from my lips in reverent whispers
poured forth no end of most abject
apologies. Of course I assisted in
recovering the fallen bills and coins,
and in less time than it takes to tell
it the vestryman was proceeding on
his way up the aisle, gathering in the
contributions from other generously
disposed persons as he went, as un-
consciously as though the contre-
temps had never occurred, and hap-
pily unaware that out of the moneys
cast to the floor by my awkward act
12



"the whole contents and the platter as well
fell at my feet"


II
THE ADVENTURE OF THE NEWPORT
VILLA
THERE is little need for me to
describe in detail the story of
my railway journey from New York to
Newport. I was uneventful and un-
productive save as to the latter end of
it, when, on the arrival of the train at
Wickford, observing that the pros-
perous-looking gentleman bound for
Boston who occupied the seat next
mine in the Pullman car was sleeping
soundly, I exchanged my well-worn
covert coat for his richly made, sable-
lined surtout, and made off as well
with his suit-case on the chance of its
holding something that might later
serve some one of my many purposes.
14


Mrs. Raffles
trast between her present luxury and
my recent misery grated harshly upon
me. I could not rid myself of the
notion that Raffles had told her of
the secret hiding-place of the diamond
stomacher of the duchess of Herring-
dale, and that she had appropriated
to her own use all the proceeds of its
sale, leaving me, who had risked my
liberty to obtain it, without a penny's
worth of dividend for my pains. It
did not seem quite a level thing to do,
and I must confess that I greeted the
lady in a reproachful spirit. It was,
indeed, she, and more radiantly beau-
tiful than ever—a trifle thinner per-
haps, and her eyes more coldly pierc-
ing than seductively winning as of
yore, but still Henriette whom I had
once so madly loved and who had
jilted me for a better man.
"Dear old Bunny!" she murmured,
holding out both hands in welcome.
"Just to think that after all these
years and in a strange land and under
16


The Newport Villa
such circumstances we should meet
again!"
"It is strange," said I, my eye
roving about the drawing-room, which
from the point of view of its appoint-
ments and decoration was about the
richest thing I had ever seen either
by light of day or in the mysterious
glimpses one gets with a dark lantern
of the houses of the moneyed classes.
"It seems more than strange," I
added, significantly, "to see you sur-
rounded by such luxury. A so-called
lodge built of the finest grade of
Italian marble; gardens fit for the
palace of a king; a retinue of ser-
vants such as one scarcely finds on
the ducal estates of the proudest fam-
ilies of England and a mansion that is
furnished with treasures of art, anyone
of which is worth a queen's ransom."
"I do not wonder you are sur-
prised," she replied, looking about the
room with a smile of satisfaction that
did little to soothe my growing wrath.
17


The Newport Villa
"Who are suing each other for
divorce," I put in, for I knew of the
Constant Scrappes in social life, as
who did not, since a good third of
the society items of the day concerned
themselves with the matrimonial dif-
ficulties of this notable couple.
''Precisely,'' said Henriette. "Now
Mrs. Scrappe is in South Dakota es-
tablishing a residence, and Colonel
Scrappe is at Monte Carlo circulating
his money with the aid of a wheel and
a small ball. Bolivar Lodge, with its
fine collection of old furniture, its
splendid jades, its marvellous Orient-
al potteries, paintings, and innumer-
able small silver articles, is left here at
Newport and for rent. What more
natural, dear, than that I, needing a
residence whose occupancy would in
itself be an assurance of my social
position, should snap it up with an
eagerness which in this Newport at-
mosphere amounted nearly'to a be-
trayal of plebeian origin?"
r9


The Newport Villa
help you pay a day's rental, I am
that strapped. Until this afternoon I
hadn't seen thirty cents all at once for
nigh on to six months. I have been
so poor that I've had to take my
morning coffee at midnight from the
coffee-wagons of the New York, Bos-
ton, and Chicago sporting papers. In
eight months I have not tasted a table-
d'hote dinner that an expert would
value at fifteen cents net, and yet you
ask me to help you pay twenty-five
hundred dollars a month rent for a
Newport palace! You must be mad.''
"You are the same loquacious old
Bunny that you used to be," said Mrs.
Raffles, sharply, yet with a touch of
affection in her voice. "You can't
keep your trap shut for a second, can
you? Do you know, Bunny, what
dear old A. J. said to me just before
he went to South Africa? It was that
if you were as devoted to business
as you were to words you'd be a
wonder. His exact remark was that


Mrs. Raffles
we would both have to look out for
you for fear you would queer the
whole business. Raffles estimated
that your habit of writing-up full ac-
counts of his various burglaries for
the London magazines had made the
risks one hundred per cent. bigger and
the available swag a thousand per
cent. harder to get hold of. 'Harry,'
said he the night before he sailed, 'if
I die over in the Transvaal and you
decide to continue the business, get
along as long as you can without a
press-agent. If you go on the stage,
surround yourself with 'em, but in the
burglary trade they are a nuisance.'"
My answer was a sulky shrug of the
shoulders.
"You haven't given me a chance to
explain how you are to help me. I
don't ask you for money, Bunny.
Four dollars' worth of obedience is all
I want," she continued. "The port-
able property in this mansion is worth
about half a million dollars, my lad,
22


The Newport Villa
these Newport people have it," said
Mrs. Raffles, beaming upon me.
"I'm still in the dark as to where I
come in," said I.
"Promise to obey my directions
implicitly," said Henriette "and you
will receive your share of the booty."
"Henriette—" I cried, passionate-
ly, seizing her hand.
"No—Bunny—not now," she re-
monstrated, gently. "This is no
time for sentiment. Just promise to
obey, the love and honor business
may come later."
"I will," said I.
"Well, then," she resumed, her
color mounting high, and speaking
rapidly, "you are to return at once
to New York, taking with you three
trunks which I have already packed,
containing one of the most beautiful
collections of jade ornaments that has
ever been gathered together. You will
rent a furnished apartment in some
aristocratic quarter. Spread these
* 25


The Newport Villa
boat that night, and by Wednesday
was safely ensconced in very beauti-
fully furnished bachelor quarters near
Gramercy Square, where on Thurs-
day Mr. Harold Van Gilt called to
see my collection of jades which I
was selling because of a contemplated
five-year journey into the East. On
Friday Mr. Van Gilt took possession
of the collection, and that night a
check for eight thousand dollars went
to Mrs. Van Raffles at Newport. In-
cidentally, I passed two thousand
dollars to my own credit. As I fig-
ured it out, if Van Gilt was willing to
pay ten thousand dollars for the stuff,
and Henriette was willing to take
eight thousand dollars for it, nobody
was the loser by my pocketing two
thousand dollars—unless, perhaps, it
was Mr. and Mrs. Constant Scrappe
who owned the goods. But that was
none of my affair. I played straight
with the others, and that was all there
was to it as far as I was concerned.
27


Ill
THE ADVENTURE OF MRS. GASTER'S
MAID
TWO days after my bargain with Mr.
Harold Van Gilt, in which he ac-
quired possession of the Scrappe jades
and Mrs. Van Raffles and I shared the
proceeds of the ten thousand dollars
check, I was installed at Bolivar Lodge
as head-butler and steward, my sala-
ry to consist of what I could make
out of it on the side, plus ten per cent.
of the winnings of my mistress. It
was not long before I discovered that
the job was a lucrative one. From
various tradesmen of the town I re-
ceived presents of no little value in the
form sometimes of diamond scarf-pins,
gold link sleeve-buttons, cases of fine
28


Mrs. Gaster's Maid
wines for my own use, and in one or
two instances checks of substantial
value. There was also what was call-
ed a steward's rebate on the monthly
bills, which in circles where lavish
entertainment is the order of the day
amounted to a tidy little income in
itself. My only embarrassment lay
in the contact into which I was nec-
essarily brought with other butlers,
with whom I was perforce required
to associate. This went very much
against the grain at first, for, although
I am scarcely more than a thief after
all, I am an artistic one, and still retain
the prejudice against inferior associa-
tions which an English gentleman
whatever the vicissitudes of his career
can never quite rid himself of. I had
to join their club—an exclusive or-
ganization of butlers and "gentle-
men's gentlemen"—otherwise valets
—and in order to quiet all suspicion
of my real status in the Van Raffles
household I was compelled to act the
29


Mrs. Raffles
part in a fashion which revolted me.
Otherwise the position was pleasant,
and, as I have intimated, more than
lucrative.
It did not take me many days to
discover that Henriette was a worthy
successor to her late husband. Few
opportunities for personal profit es-
caped her eye, and I was able to ob-
serve as time went on and I noted the
accumulation of spoons, forks, nut-
crackers, and gimcracks generally that
she brought home with her after her
calls upon or dinners with ladies of
fashion that she had that quality of
true genius which never overlooks the
smallest details.
The first big coup after my arrival,
as the result of her genius, was in the
affair of Mrs. Gaster's maid. Henri-
ette had been to a bridge afternoon
at Mrs. Gaster's and upon her return
manifested an extraordinary degree of
excitement. Her color was high, and
when she spoke her voice was tremu-
3°


Mrs. Gaster's Maid
lous. Her disturbed condition was so
evident that my heart sank into my
boots, for in our business nerve is a
sine qua non of success, and it looked
to me as if Henriette was losing hers.
She has probably lost at cards to-day,
I thought, and it has affected her
usual calmness. I must do some-
thing to warn her against this mo-
mentary weakness. With this idea
in mind, when the opportunity pre-
sented itself later I spoke.
"You lost at bridge to-day, Henri-
ette," I said.
"Yes," she replied. "Twenty-five
hundred dollars in two hours. How
did you guess?"
"By your manner," said I. "You
are as nervous as a young girl at
a commencement celebration. This
won't do, Henriette. Nerves will
prove your ruin, and if you can't
stand your losses at bridge, what will
you do in the face of the greater crisis
which 'in our profession is likely to
3i


Mrs. Gaster's Maid
"No detectives, I hope," I replied,
paling at the thought.
"No, sir," she laughed. "Mrs.
Gaster's maid. We must get her,
Bunny."
"Oh, tush!" I ejaculated. "All
this powwow over another woman's
maid!"
"You don't understand," said
Henriette. "It wasn't the maid so
much as the woman that startled
me, Bunny. You can't guess who
she was."
"How should I?" I demanded.
"She was Fiametta de Belleville,
one of the most expert hands in our
business. Poor old Raffles used to
say that she diminished his income a
good ten thousand pounds a year by
getting in her fine work ahead of his,"
explained Henriette. "He pointed
her out to me in Piccadilly once and I
have never forgotten her face."
"I hope she did not recognize you,"
I observed.
33


Mrs. Raffles
"No, indeed — she never saw me
before, so how could she? But I
knew her the minute she took my
cloak," said Henriette. "She's dyed
her hair, but her eyes were the same
as ever, and that peculiar twist of the
lip that Raffles had spoken of as
constituting one of her fascinations
remained unchanged. Moreover, just
to prove myself right, I left my lace
handkerchief and a five hundred dol-
lar bill in the cloak pocket. When I
got the cloak back both were gone.
Oh, she's Fiametta de Belleville all
right, and we must get her."
"What for—to rob you?"
"No," returned Henrietta, "rather
that we—but there, there, Bunny, I'll
manage this little thing myself. It's
a trifle too subtle for a man's intel-
lect—especially when that man is
you."
"What do you suppose she is doing
here?" I asked.
"You silly boy,'' laughed Henriette.
34


Mrs. Raffles
tents and purposes relieved of all
odium.
"She'll skip now," said I.
"Not she," said Henriette. "To
disappear now would be a confession
of guilt. If Fiametta de Belleville is
the woman I take her for she'll stay
right here as if nothing had happened,
but of course not at Mrs. Gaster's."
"Where then?" I asked.
"With Mrs. A. J. Van Raffles," re-
plied Henriette. "The fact is," she
added, "I have already engaged her.
She has acted her part well, and has
seemed so prostrated by the unjust
suspicion of the world that even Mrs.
Gaster is disturbed over her condi-
tion. She has asked her to remain,
but Fiametta has refused. 'I couldn't,
madam,' she said when Mrs. Gaster
asked her to stay. 'You have accused
me of a fearful crime — a crime of
which I am innocent—and—I'd rath-
er work in a factory, or become a
shop-girl in a department store, than
36


Mrs. Raffles
found in the Social Capital of the
United States. As for me, I was the
picture of gloom. The woman's pres-
ence in our household could not be
but a source of danger to our peace
of mind as well as to our profits, and
for the life of me I could not see why
Henriette should want her there. But
I was not long in finding out.
i A week after Fiametta's arrival
Mrs. Raffles rang hurriedly for me.
"Yes, madam," I said, responding
immediately to her call.
"Bunny," she said, her hand trem-
bling a little, "the hour for action has
arrived. I have just sent Fiametta
on an errand to Providence. She will
be gone three hours."
"Yes!" said I. "What of it?"
"I want you during her absence to
go with me to her room—"
The situation began to dawn on
me.
"Yes!" I cried, breathlessly. "And
search her trunks?"
38


Mrs. Gaster's Maid
"No, Bunny, no—the eaves," whis-
pered Henriette. "I gave her that
room in the wing because it has so
many odd cubby-holes where she
could conceal things. I am inclined
to think—well, the moment she leaves
the city let me know. Follow her to
the station, and don't return till you
know she is safely out of town and
on her way to Providence. Then our
turn will come."
Oh, that woman! If I had not
adored her before I — but enough.
This is no place for sentiment. The
story is the thing, and I must tell it
briefly.
I followed out Henriette's instruc-
tions to the letter, and an hour later
returned with the information that
Fiametta was, indeed, safely on her
way.
"Good," said Mrs. Raffles. "And
now, Bunny, for the Gaster jewels."
Mounting the stairs rapidly, taking
care, of course, that there were none
39


Mrs. Raffles
of the other servants about to spy
upon us, we came to the maid's room.
Everything in it betokened a high
mind and a good character. There
were religious pictures upon the bu-
reau, prayer-books, and some volumes
of essays of a spiritual nature were
scattered about—nothing was there
to indicate that the occupant was
anything but a simple, sweet child of
innocence except—
Well, Henriette was right — ex-
cept the Gaster jewels. Even as my
mistress had suspected, they were
cached under the eaves, snuggled close
against the huge dormer - window
looking out upon the gardens; laid by
for a convenient moment to get them
out of Newport, and then—back to
England for Fiametta. And what a
gorgeous collection they were! Dog-
collars of diamonds, yards of pearl
rope, necklaces of rubies of the most
lustrous color and of the -size of
pigeons' eggs, rings, brooches, tiaras—
40



"her slight little figure convulsed with
grief"





Mrs. Gaster's Maid
everything in the way of jewelled
ornament the soul of woman could
desire — all packed closely away in
a tin box that I now remembered
Fiametta had brought with her in her
hand the day of her arrival. And now
all these things were ours—Henriette's
and mine—without our having had to
stir out-of-doors to get them. An hour
later they were in the safety-deposit
vault of Mrs. A. J. Van Raffles in the
sturdy cellars of the Tiverton Trust
Company, as secure against intrusion
as though they were locked in the
heart of Gibraltar itself.
And Fiametta? Well—a week later
she left Newport suddenly, her eyes
red with weeping and her slight little
figure convulsed with grief. Her fa-
vorite aunt had just died, she said,
and she was going back to England
to bury her.


IV
THE PEARL ROPE OP MRS. GUSHING-
TON-ANDREWS
BUNNY," said Henriette one
morning, shortly after we had
come into possession of the Gaster
jewels, "how is your nerve? Are you
ready for a coup requiring a lot
of it?"
'Well," I replied, pluming myself
a bit, "I don't wish to boast, Hen-
riette, but I think it is pretty good.
I managed to raise twenty - seven
hundred dollars on my own account
by the use of it last night."
"Indeed?" said Henriette, with a
slight frown. "How, Bunny? You
know you are likely to complicate
matters for all of us if you work on
42


Mrs. Gushington-Andrews
the side. What, pray, did you do
last night?"
And then I unfolded to her the in-
cidents of the night before when, by
assuming at a moment's notice the
position of valet to young Robertson
de Pelt, the frisky young favorite of
the inner set, I had relieved that high-
flying young bachelor of fifteen hun-
dred dollars in cash and some twelve
hundred dollars worth of jewels aswell.
"I was spending the evening at the
Gentlemen's Gentlemen's Club," I
explained, "when word came over the
telephone to Digby, Mr. de Pelt's
valet, that Mr. de Pelt was at the
Rockerbilts' and in no condition to go
home alone. It happened that it was
I who took the message, and observ-
ing that Digby was engaged in a game
of billiards, and likely to remain so
for some time to come, I decided to go
after the gentleman myself without
saying anything to Digby about it.
Muffling myself up so that no one
43


Mrs. Raffles
could recognize me, I hired a cab and
drove out to the Rockerbilt mansion,
sent in word that Mr. de Pelt's man
was waiting for him, and in ten
minutes had the young gentleman in
my possession. I took'him to his
apartment, dismissed the cab, and,
letting ourselves into his room with
his own latch-key, put him to bed.
His clothes I took, as a well-ordered
valet should, from his bed-chamber
into an adjoining room, where, after
removing the contents of his pockets,
I hung them neatly over a chair and
departed, taking with me, of course,
everything of value the young gen-
tleman had about him, even down
to the two brilliant rubies he wore in
his garter buckles. This consisted
of two handfuls of crumpled twenty-
dollar bills from his trousers, three
rolls of one-hundred-dollar bills from
his waistcoat, and sundry other lots
of currency, both paper and specie,
that I found stowed away in his over-
44


Mrs. Gushington-Andrews
coat and dinner-coat pockets. There
were also ten twenty-dollar gold pieces
in a little silver chain-bag he carried
on his wrist. As I say, there was
about fifteen hundred dollars of this
loose change, and I reckon up the
value of his studs, garter rubies, and
finger-rings at about twelve hundred
dollars more, or a twenty-seven hun-
dred dollars pull in all. Eh?"
"Mercy, Bunny, that was a terri-
bly risky thing. Suppose he had rec-
ognized you?" cried Henriette.
"Oh, he did—or at least he thought
he did," I replied, smiling broadly at
the recollection. "On the way home
in the cab he wept on my shoulder and
said I was the best friend he ever had,
and told me he loved me like a brother.
There wasn't anything he wouldn't
do for me, and if ever I wanted an
automobile or a grand-piano all I had
to do was to ask him for it. He was
very genial."
"Well, Bunny," said Henriette,
45


Mrs. Raffles
"you are very clever at times, but do
be careful. I am delighted to have
you show your nerve now and then,
but please don't take any serious
chances. If Mr. de Pelt ever recog-
nizes you—and he dines here next
Wednesday—you'll get us both into
awful trouble."
Again I laughed. "He won't,"
said I, with a conviction born of ex-
perience. "His geniality was of the
kind that leaves the mind a blank the
following morning. I don't believe
Mr. de Pelt remembers now that he
was at the Rockerbilts' last night,
and even if he does, you know that I
was in this house at eleven o'clock."
"I, Bunny? Why, I haven't seen
you since dinner," she demurred.
"Nevertheless, Henriette, you know
that I was in the house at eleven
o'clock last night—or, rather, you will
know it if you are ever questioned on
the subject, which you won't be,"
said I. "So, now that I have shown
'46


Mrs. Gushington-Andrews
you in just what shape my nerve is,
what is the 'demand you are going to
put upon it?"
"You will have to bring to the
enterprise all that ability which used
to characterize your efforts as an
amateur actor, Bunny," she replied.
"Summon all your sang-froid to your
aid; act with deliberation, courtesy,
and, above all, without the slightest
manifestation of nervousness, and we
should win, not a petty little twenty-
seven hundred dollars, but as many
thousands. You know Mrs. Gush-
ington-Andrews?"
"Yes," said I. "She is the lady
who asked me for the olives at your
last dinner."
"Precisely," observed Henriette.
"You possibly observed also that
wherever she goes she wears about
sixty-nine yards of pearl rope upon
her person."
"Rope?" I laughed. "I shouldn't
call that rope. Cable, yes—frankly,
47


Mrs. Raffles
when she came into the dining-room
the other night I thought it was a
feather-boa she had on."
"All pearls, Bunny, of the finest
water," said Henriette, enthusiasti-
cally. "There isn't one of the thou-
sands that isn't worth anywhere from
five hundred to twenty-five hundred."
"And I am to land a yard or two of
the stuff for you in some mysterious
way?" I demanded. "How is it to
be — by kidnapping the lady, the
snatch and run game, or how?"
"Sarcasm does not suit your com-
plexion, Bunny," retorted Henriette.
"Your best method is to follow im-
plicitly the directions of wiser brains.
You are a first-class tool, but as a
principal — well — well, never mind.
You do what I tell you and some of
those pearls will be ours. Mrs. Gush-
ington-Andrews, as you may have
noticed, is one of those exceedingly
effusive ladies who go into ecstasies
over everything and everybody. She
48


Mrs. Gushington-Andrews
is what Raffles used to call a palaverer.
Where most people nod she describes
a complete circle with her head. When
a cold, formal handshake is necessary-
she perpetrates an embrace, and that
is where we come in. At my next
Tuesday tea she will be present. She
will wear her pearls—she'll be strung
with them from head to foot. A
rope-walk won't be in it with her, and
every single little jewel will be worth
a small fortune. You, Bunny, will
be in the room to announce her when
she arrives. She will rush to my arms,
throw her own about my neck, the
ornaments of my corsage will catch
the rope at two or more points, sever
the thread in several places, pearls will
rain down upon the floor by dozens,
and then—"
"I'm to snatch 'em and dive through
the window, eh?" I interrupted.
"No, Bunny—you will behave like
a gentleman, that is all," she re-
sponded, haughtily; "or rather like a
49


Mrs. Raffles
butler with the instincts of a gentle-
man. At my cry of dismay over the
accident—"
"Better call it the incident," I put
in.
"Hush! At my cry of dismay
over the accident," Henriette re-
peated, "you will spring forward, go
down upon your knees, and gather up
the jewels by the handful. You will
pour them back into Mrs. Gushington-
Andrews's hands and retire. Now, do
you see?"
"H'm—yes," said I. "But how
do you get the pearls if I pour them
back into her hands? Am I to slide
some of them under the rugs, or flick
them with my thumb-nail under the
piano—or what?"
"Nothing of the sort, Bunny; just
do as I tell you — only bring your
gloves to me just before the guests
arrive, that is all," said Henriette.
"Instinct will carry you through the
rest of it."
5°


Mrs. Gushington-Andrews
And then the conspiracy stopped
for the moment.
The following Tuesday at five the
second of Mrs. Van Rafnes's Tuesday
afternoons began. Fortune favored
us in that it was a beautiful day and
the number of guests was large.
Henriette was charming in her new
gown specially imported from Paris—
a gown of Oriental design with row
upon row of brilliantly shining, cres-
cent-shaped ornaments firmly affixed
to the front of it and every one of
them as sharp as a steel knife. I
could see at a glance that even if so
little as one of these fastened its talons
upon the pearl rope of Mrs. Gushing-
ton-Andrews nothing under heaven
could save it from laceration.
What a marvellous mind there lay
behind those exquisite, childlike eyes
of the wonderful Henriette!
"Remember, Bunny—calm deliber-
ation— your gloves now," were her
last words to me.
Si








Mrs. Gushington-Andrews
Gushington-Andrews. "And you look
so exquisitely charming to-day—"
And then there came a ripping
sound. The two women started to
draw away from each other; five of
the crescents catching in the rope, in
the impulsive jerking back of Mrs.
Gushington-Andrews in order that
she might gaze into Henriette's eyes,
cut through the marvellous cords of
the exquisite jewels. There was a cry
of dismay both from Henriette and
her guest, and the rug beneath their
feet was simply white with riches. In
a moment I was upon my knees
scooping them up by the handful.
"Oh, dear, how very unfortunate!"
cried Henriette. "Here, dear," she
added, holding out a pair of teacups.
"Let James pour them into this," and
James, otherwise myself, did so to the
extent of five teacups full of them and
then he discreetly retired.
"Well, Bunny," said Henriette,
S3


Mrs. Raffles
breathlessly, two hours later when
her last guest had gone. "Tell me
quickly—what was the result?"
"These, madam," said I, handing
her a small plush bag into which I had
poured the "salvage" taken from my
sticky palms. "A good afternoon's
work," I added.
And, egad, it was: seventeen pearls
of a value of twelve hundred dollars
each, fifteen worth scarcely less than
nine hundred dollars apiece, and
some twenty-seven or eight smaller
ones that we held to be worth in the
neighborhood of five hundred dollars
each.
"Splendid!" cried Henriette.
"Roughly speaking, Bunny, we've
pulled in between forty and fifty
thousand dollars to-day."
"About that," said I, with an in-
ward chuckle, for I, of course, did not
tell Henriette of eight beauties I had
kept out of the returns for myself.
"But what are we going to do when
54



"i, OP COURSE. DID NOT TELL HENRIETTE OP EIGHT
BEAUTIES I HAD KEPT OUT"





Mrs. Gushington-Andrews
Mrs. Gushington-Andrews finds out
that they are gone?"
"I shall provide for that," said this
wonderful woman. "I shall throw
her off the scent by sending you over
to her at once with sixteen of these
assorted. I hate to give them up,
but I think it advisable to pay that
much as a sort of insurance against
suspicion. Even then we'll be thirty-
five thousand dollars to the good.
And, by-the-way, Bunny, I want to
congratulate you on one thing."
"Ah! What's that—my sang-froid,
my nerve?" I asked, airily.
"No, the size of your hands," said
Henriette. "The superficial area of
those palms of yours has been worth
ten thousand dollars to us to-day."


Mrs. Raffles
riette," I answered, desirous of placat-
ing her.
"Then you should know better
than to intimate that I am in this
business for the sordid dollars and
cents there are to be got out of it,"
pouted my mistress. "Mr. Vauxhall
Bean doesn't chase the aniseseed bag
because he loves to shed the aniseseed
or hungers for bags as an article of
food. He does it for the excitement
of the hunt; because he loves to feel
the movement of the hunter that he
sits so well between his knees; because
he is enamoured of the baying of the
hounds, the winding of the horn, and
welcomes the element of personal
danger that enters into the sport
when he and his charger have to take
an unusual fence or an extra broad
watercourse. So with me. In sepa-
rating these people here from their
money and their jewels, it is not the
money and the jewels that I care for
so much as the delicious risks I in-
58


Adventure of the Steel Bonds
cur in getting them. What the high
fence is to the hunter, the barriers
separating me from Mrs. Gaster's
jewel-case are to me; what the watch-
ful farmer armed with a shot-gun for
the protection of his crops is to the
master of the hounds, the police are to
me. The game of circumventing the
latter and surmounting the former
are the joy of my life, and while my
eyes flash and sparkle with appetite
every time I see a necklace or a tiara
or a roll of hundred - dollar bills in
the course of my social duties, it is not
avarice that makes them glitter, but
the call to action which they sound."
I felt like saying that if that were
the case I should esteem it a privilege
to be made permanent custodian of
the balance in hand, but it was quite
evident from Henriette's manner that
she was in no mood for badinage, so I
held my peace.
"To prove to you that I am not
out for the money, Bunny, I'll give
59


Adventure of the Steel Bonds
hundred thousand dollars, thanks to
a circular system of checks in an
endless chain that I have devised.
Naturally the size of these accounts
has hugely interested the bank offi-
cials, and they all regard me as a most
desirable customer, and I think I can
manage matters so that two or three
of them, anyhow, will lend me all the
money I want on those bonds and
this certificate of trust which I shall
ask you to sign."
"Me?" I laughed. "Surely you
are joking. What value will my sig-
nature have?"
"It will be good as gold after you
have deposited that check for two
hundred and fifty thousand dollars
in your New York bank," said Hen-
riette. "I shall go to the president
of the Ohoolihan National Bank at
Oshkosh, Ohio, where I have at pres-
ent three hundred and sixty-eight
thousand three hundred and forty-
three dollars and eighteen cents on
61


Mrs. Raffles
deposit and tell him that the Hon.
John Warrington Bunny, of New
York, is my trustee for an estate of
thirteen million dollars in funds set
apart for me by a famous relative
of mine who is not proud of the
connection. He will communicate
with you and ask you if this is true.
You will respond by sending him a
certified copy of the trust certificate,
and refer him as to your own respon-
sibility to the New York bank where
our two hundred and fifty thousand
dollars is on deposit. I will then swap
checks with you for three hundred
thousand dollars, mine to you going
into your New York account and
yours to me as trustee going into my
account with the Ohoolihan National.
The New York bank will naturally
speak well of your balance, and the
Ohoolihan people, finding the three-
hundred-thousand-dollar check good,
will never think of questioning your
credit. This arranged, we will start
62





Adventure of the Steel Bonds
in to wash those steel bonds up to the
limit."
"That's a very simple little plan of
yours, Henriette," said I, "and the
first part of it will work easily I have
no doubt; but how the deuce are you
going to wash those bonds up to
fifteen times their value?"
"Easiest thing in the world,
Bunny," laughed Henriette. "There
will be two million dollars of the
bonds before I get through."
"Heavens — no counterfeiting, I
hope?" I cried.
"Nothing so vulgar," said Hen-
riette. "Just a little management—
that's all. And, by-the-way, Bunny,
when you get a chance, please hire
twenty safe-deposit boxes for me in
as many different trust companies
here and in New York — and don't
have 'em too near together. That's
all for the present."
Three weeks later, having followed
out Henriette's instructions to the
63


Mrs. Raffles
letter, I received at my New York
office a communication from the
president of the Ohoolihan National
Bank, of Oshkosh, Ohio, inquiring as
to the Van Raffles trust fund. I re-
plied with a certified copy of the
original which Henriette had already
placed in the president's hands. I
incidentally referred the inquirer as to
my own standing to the Delancy Trust
Company, of New York. The three-
hundred-thousand-dollar checks were
exchanged by Henriette and myself—
hers, by-the-way, was on the Seventy-
Sixth National Bank, of Brookline,
Massachusetts, and was signed by a
fictitious male name, which shows how
carefully she had covered her tracks.
Both went through without question,
and then the steel bonds came into
play. Henriette applied for a loan of
one million five hundred thousand
dollars, offering the trust certificate
for security. The president of the
Ohoolihan National wished to see
64


Adventure of the Steel Bonds
some of her other securities, if she had
any, to which Henriette cordially re-
plied that if he would come to New
York she would gladly show them to
him, and intimated that if the loan
went through she wouldn't mind pay-
ing the bank a bonus of one hundred
thousand dollars for the accommoda-
tion. The response was immediate.
Mr. Bolivar would come on at once,
and he did.
"Now, Bunny," said Mrs. Van Raf-
fles on the morning of his arrival,
"all you have to do is to put the one
hundred bonds first in the vault of the
Amalgamated Trust Company, of West
Virginia, on Wall Street. Mr. Bolivar
and I will go there and I will show
them to him. We will then depart.
Immediately after our departure you
will get the bonds and take them to
the vaults of the Trans-Missouri and
Continental Trust Company, of New
Jersey, on Broadway. You will go
on foot, we in a hansom, so that you
65


Mrs. Raffles
will get there first. I will take Mr.
Bolivar in and show him the bonds
again. Then you will take them to
the vaults of the Riverside Coal Trust
Company, of Pennsylvania, on Broad
Street, where five minutes later I will
show them for the third time to Mr.
Bolivar—and so on. We will repeat
this operation eighteen times in New
York so that our visitor will fancy he
has seen one million eight hundred
thousand dollars' worth of bonds in
all, after which he will come to New-
port, where I will show them to him
twice more—making a two-million-
dollar show-down. See?"
I toppled back into a chair in sheer
amazement.
"By Jingo! but you are a wonder,"
I cried. "If it only works."
It worked. Mr. Bolivar was duly
impressed with the extent of Hen-
riette's fortune in tangible assets, not
to mention her evident standing in the
66








Adventure of the Steel Bonds
community of her residence. He was
charmingly entertained and never for
an instant guessed when at dinner
where Henriette had no less person-
ages than the Rockerbilts, Mrs. Gaster,
Mrs. Gushington - Andrews, Tommy
Dare, and various other social lights
to meet him, that the butler who
passed him his soup and helped him
liberally to wine was the Hon. John
Warrington Bunny, trustee.
"Well," said Henriette, as she
gazed delightedly at the president's
certified check for one million four hun-
dred thousand dollars—the amount
of the loan less the bonus — " that
was the best sport yet. Even aside
from the size of the check, Bunny, it
was great chasing the old man to
cover. What do you think he said
to me when he left, the poor, dear old
innocent?"
"Give it up—what?"
"He said that I ought to be very
careful in my dealings with men, who
67


VI
THE ADVENTURE OF THE FRESH-AIR
FUND
IT was a bright, sunny morning in
the early summer when Henriette,
gazing out of the dining-room win-
dows across the lawns adjoining the
Rockerbilt place, caught sight of a
number of ragamuffins at play there.
"Who are those little tatterdemal-
ions, Bunny?" she asked, with a sug-
gestion of a frown upon her brow.
"They have been playing on the lawns
since seven o'clock this morning, and
I've lost quite two hours' sleep be-
cause of their chatter."
"They are children from Mrs.
Rockerbilt's Fresh-Air Society," I ex-
plained, for I, too, had been annoyed
69


Mrs. Raffles
by the loud pranks of the youngsters
and had made inquiries as to their
identity. "Every summer, Digby,
Mr. de Pelt's valet, tells me, Mrs.
Rockerbilt gives a tea for the benefit
of the Fresh-Air Fund, and she al-
ways has a dozen of the children from
town for a week beforehand so as to
get them in shape for the function."
"Get them in shape for the func-
tion, Bunny?" asked Henriette.
"Yes; one of the features of the
tea is the presence of the youngsters,
and they have to be pretty well re-
hearsed before Mrs. Rockerbilt dares
let them loose among her guests,"
said I, for Digby had explained the
scheme in detail to me. "You see,
their ideas of fun are rather primitive,
and if they were suddenly introduced
into polite society without any pre-
vious training the results might prove
unpleasant."
"Ah!" said Henriette, gazing ab-
stractedly out of the window in the
70


The Fresh-Air Fund
manner of one suddenly seized with
an idea.
"Yes," I went on. "You see, the
street gamin loves nothing better in
the way of diversion than throwing
things at somebody, particularly if
that somebody is what is known to
his vernacular as a Willie-boy. As
between eating an over-ripe peach
and throwing it at the pot-hat of a
Willie-boy, the ragamuffin would deny
even the cravings of his stomach for
that tender morsel. It is his delight,
too, to heave tin cans, wash-boilers,
fiat-irons, pies—anything he can lay
his hands on — at the automobilly-
boys, if I may use the term, of all of
which, before he is turned loose in the
highest social circles of the land, it is
desirable that he shall be cured."
"I see," said Henriette. "And so
Mrs. Rockerbilt has them here on a
ten days' probation during which
time they acquire that degree of
savoir-faire and veneer of etiquette
7i


Mrs. Raffles
which alone makes it possible for her
to exhibit them at her tea."
"Precisely," said I. "She lets
them sleep in the big box-stalls of her
stable where the extra coach-horses
were kept before the motor-car craze
came in. They receive four square
meals a day, are rubbed down and
curry-combed before each meal, and
are bathed night and morning in
violet water until the fateful occasion,
after which they are returned to New
York cleaner if not wiser children."
"It is a great charity," said Hen-
riette, dreamily. "Does Mrs. Rock-
erbilt make any charge for admission
to these teas—you say they are for
the benefit of the Fresh-Air Fund?"
"Oh no, indeed," said I. "It is
purely a private charity. The young-
sters get their ten days in the country,
learn good manners, and Newport so-
ciety has a pleasant afternoon—all at
Mrs. Rockerbilt's expense."
"H'm!" said Henriette, pensively.
72


The Fresh-Air Fund
"H'm! I think there is a better
method. Ah—I want you to run
down to New York for a few days
shortly, Bunny. I have a letter I
wish you tomail."
Nothing more was said on the sub-
ject until the following Tuesday, when
I was despatched to New York with
instructions to organize myself into
a Winter Fresh-Air Society, to have
letter-heads printed, with the names
of some of the most prominent ladies
in society as patronesses—Henriette
had secured permission from Mrs.
Gaster, Mrs. Sloyd-Jinks, Mrs. Rock-
erbilt, Mrs. Gushington - Andrews,
Mrs. R. U. Innit, the duchess of
Snarleyow, Mrs. Willie K. Van Pelt,
and numerous others to use their
names in connection with the new
enterprise—and to write her a letter
asking if she would not interest herself
and her friends in the needs of the
new society.
"It is quite as important," the
6 73


The Fresh-Air Fund
Bunny," said Mrs. Van Raffles, when
I had returned with the spoil.
"Great Scot!" I cried. "Haven't
you got enough?"
"No, Bunny. Not a quarter
enough," she replied. "These win-
ter resorts are very expensive places,
and while seventeen thousand dollars
would do very nicely for running a
farm in summer, we shall need quite
a hundred thousand to send our bene-
ficiaries to Palm Beach in proper style.''
"Phe-e-w!" I whistled, in amaze-
ment. "Palm Beach, eh?"
"Yes," said Henriette. "Palm
Beach. I have always wanted to go
there."
"And the one hundred thousand
dollars—how do you propose to get
that?" I demanded.
"I shall give a lawn-f&te and bazaar
for the benefit of the fund. It will
differ from Mrs. Rockerbilt's tea in
that I shall charge ten dollars ad-
mission, ten dollars to get out, and
75


Mrs. Raffles
we shall sell things besides. I have
already spoken to Mrs. Gaster about
it and she is delighted with the idea.
She has promised to stock the flower
table with the cream of her conserva-
tories. Mrs. Rockerbilt has volun-
teered to take charge of the refresh-
ments. The duchess of Snarleyow is
dressing a doll that is to be named
by Senator Defew and raffled at five
dollars a guess. Mrs. Gushington-
Andrews is to take entire control of
the fancy knick-knack table, where
we shall sell gold match-boxes, solid
silver automobile head-lights, cigar-
cutters, cocktail - shakers, and other
necessities of life among the select.
I don't see how the thing can fail, do
you?"
"Not so far," said I.
"Each of the twelve lady patron-
esses has promised to be responsible
for the sale of a hundred tickets of ad-
mission at ten dollars apiece — that
makes twelve thousand dollars in ad-
76


The Fresh-Air Fund

missions. It will cost each person
ten dollars more to get out, which, if
only half of the tickets are used, will
be six thousand dollars—or eighteen
thousand dollars in entrance and exit
fees alone."
"Henriette!" I cried, enthusiasti-
cally, "Madam Humbert was an
amateur alongside of you."
Mrs. Van Raffles smiled. "Thank
you, Bunny," said she. "If I'd only
been a man—"
"Gad !*' I ejaculated. "Wall Street
would have been an infant in your
hands."
Well, the fateful day came. Hen-
riette, to do her justice, had herself
spared no pains or expense to make
the thing a success. I doubt if the
gardens of the Constant-Scrappes
ever looked so beautiful. There were
flowers everywhere, and hanging from
tree to tree from one end of their
twenty acres to the other were long
and graceful garlands of multicolored
77


The Fresh-Air Fund
A more festal occasion has never
been known even in this festal en-
vironment. The richest of the land
vied with one another in making the
affair a vast financial success. The
ever gallant Tommy Dare left the
scene twenty times for the mere
privilege of paying his way in and out
that many times over at ten dollars
each way. The doll which Senator
Defew had named was also the cause
of much merriment, since when all was
over and some thirteen thousand five
hundred dollars had been taken in for
guesses, it was found that the senator
had forgotten the name he had given
it. When the laughter over this in-
cident had subsided, Henriette sug-
gested that it be put up at auction,
which plan was immediately followed
out, with the result that the handi-
work of the duchess of Snarleyow
was knocked down for eight thousand
six hundred and seventy-five dollars
to a Cincinnati brewer who had been
79 .


Mrs. Raffles
trying for eight years to get his name
into the Social Register.
"Thank goodness, that's over,"said
Henriette when the last guest had
gone and the lights were out. "It
has been a very delightful affair, but
towards the end it began to get on
my nerves. I am really appalled,
Bunny, at the amount of money we
have taken in."
"Did you get the full one hundred
thousand dollars?" I asked.
"Full hundred thousand?" she
cried, hysterically. "Listen to this."
And she read the following mem-
orandum of the day's receipts:
Flower Table
Doll. . . .
Admissions .
Exits . . .
Candy Table.
Supper Table
Knick-Knacks
Book Table .
Coat Checks .
Total. .
. $36,000.00
22,175.00
19,260.00
17,500.00
. 12,350.00
43,060.00
17,380.00
123-3°
3-34°°°
$171,188.30
80


The Fresh-Air Fund
"Great Heavens, what a haul!" I
cried. "But how much did you
spend yourself?"
"Oh—about twenty thousand dol-
lars, Bunny — I really felt I could
afford it. We'll net not less than one
hundred and fifty thousand."
I was suddenly seized with a chill.
"The thing scares me, Henriette,"
I murmured. "Suppose these people
ask you next winter for a report?"
"Oh," laughed Henriette, "I shall
immediately turn the money over to
the fund. You can send me a receipt
and that will let us out. Later on
you can return the money to me."
"Even then—" I began.
"Tush, Bunny," said she. "There
isn't going to be any even then. Six
months from now these people will
have forgotten all about it. It's a
little way they have. Their memory
for faces and the money they spend
is shorter than the purse of a bank-
rupt. Have no fear."
81


THE ADVENTURE OF MRS. ROCKER-
bilt's TIARA
HENRIETTE had been unwont-
edly reserved for a whole week,
a fact which was beginning to get
sadly on my nerves when she broke
an almost Sphinxlike silence with the
extraordinary remark:
"Bunny, I am sorry, but I don't see
any other way out of it. You must
get married."
To say that I was shocked by the
observation is putting it mildly. As
you must by this time have realized
yourself, there was only one woman in
the world that I could possibly bring
myself to think fondly of, and that
woman was none other than Hen-
84


Mrs. Rockerbilt's Tiara
riette herself. I could not believe,
however, that this was at all the no-
tion she had in mind, and what little
poise I had was completely shattered
by the suggestion.
I drew myself up with dignity,'
however, in a moment and answered
her.
"Very well, dear," I said. "When-
ever you are ready I am. You must
have banked enough by this time to
be able to support me in the style to
which I am accustomed."
"That is not what I meant, Bun-
ny," she retorted, coldly, frowning at
me.
"Well, it's what I mean," said I.
"You are the only woman I ever
loved—"
"But, Bunny dear, that can come
later," said she, with a charming little
blush. "What I meant, my dear
boy, was not a permanent affair but
one of these Newport marriages. Not
necessarily for publication, but as a
8S


Mrs. Raffles
guarantee of good faith," she ex-
plained.
"I don't understand," said I, af-
fecting denseness, for I understood
only too well.
"Stupid!" cried Henriette. "I need
a confidential maid, Bunny, to help
us in our business, and I don't want
to take a third party in at random.
If you had a wife I could trust her.
You could stay married as long as
we needed her, and then, following
the Newport plan, you could get rid
of her and marry me later—that is—
er—provided I was willing to marry
you at all, and I am not so sure that
I shall not be some day, when I am
old and toothless."
"I fail to see the necessity for a
maid of that kind," said I.
"That's because you are a man,
Bunny," said Henriette. "There are
splendid opportunities for acquiring
the gems these Newport ladies wear
by one who may be stationed in the
86


Mrs. Rockerbilt's Tiara
dressing-room. There is Mrs. Rock-
erbilt's tiara, for instance. It is at
present the finest thing of its kind
in existence and of priceless value.
When she isn't wearing it it is kept in
the vaults of the Tiverton Trust Com-
pany, and how on earth we are to get
it without the assistance of a maid
we can trust I don't see—except in
the vulgar, commonplace way of
sandbagging the lady and brutally
stealing it, and Newport society hasn't
quite got to the point where you can
do a thing like that to a woman with-
out causing talk, unless you are
married to her."
"Well, I'll tell you one thing, Hen-
riette," I returned, with more positive-
ness than I commonly show, "I will
not marry a lady's maid, and that's
all there is about it. You forget that
I am a gentleman."
"It's only a temporary arrange-
ment, Bunny," she pleaded. "It's
done all the time in the smart set."
87 *


Mrs. Rockerbilt's Tiara
erbilt's tiara in paste for one of the
characters to wear, substitute the
spurious for the real, and there you
are."
"That is a good idea," said Hen-
riette; "only I hate amateur theatri-
cals. I'll think it over."
A few days later my mistress sum-
moned me again.
"Bunny, you used to make fairly
good sketches, didn't you ?" she asked.
"Pretty good," said I. "Chiefly
architectural drawings, however—de-
tails of facades and ornamental de-
signs."
"Just the thing!" cried Henriette.
"To-night Mrs. Rockerbilt gives a
moonlight reception on her lawns.
They adjoin ours. She will wear her
tiara, and I want you when she is in
the gardens to hide behind some con-
venient bit of shrubbery and make
an exact detail sketch of the tiara.
Understand?"
"I do," said I.
» 89


Mrs. Raffles
"Don't you miss a ruby or a dia-
mond or the teeniest bit of filigree,
Bunny. Get the whole thing to a
carat," she commanded.
"And then?" I asked, excitedly.
"Bring it to me; I'll attend to the
rest," said she.
You may be sure that when night
came I went at the work in hand with
alacrity. It was not always easy to
get the right light on the lady's tiara,
but in several different quarters of
the garden I got her sufficiently well,
though unconsciously, posed to ac-
complish my purpose. Once I nearly
yielded to the temptation to reach
my hand through the shrubbery and
snatch the superb ornament from
Mrs. Rockerbilt's head, for she was
quite close enough to make this pos-
sible, but the vulgarity of such an
operation was so very evident that I
put it aside almost as soon as thought
of. And I have always remembered
dear old Raffles's remark, "Take
90








Mrs. Rockerbilt's Tiara
everything in sight, Bunny," he used
to say; "but, damn it, do it like a
gentleman, not a professional."
The sketch made, I took it to my
room and colored it, so that that night,
when Henriette returned, I had ready
for her a perfect pictorial representa-
tion of the much-coveted bauble.
"It is simply perfect, Bunny," she
cried, delightedly, as she looked at it.
"You have even got the sparkle of
that incomparable ruby in the front."
Next morning we went to New
York, and Henriette, taking my design
to a theatrical property-man we knew
on Union Square, left an order for its
exact reproduction in gilt and paste.
"I am going to a little fancy-dress
dance, Mr. Sikes," she explained, "as
Queen Catharine of Russia, and this
tiara is a copy of the very famous lost
negligee crown of that unhappy queen.
Do you think you can let me have it
by Tuesday next?"
"Easily, madam," said Sikes. "It
91


Mrs. Raffles
is a beautiful thing and it will give me
real pleasure to reproduce it. I'll
guarantee it will be so like the original
that the queen herself couldn't tell
'em apart. It will cost you forty-
eight dollars.
"Agreed," said Henriette.
And Sikes was true to his word.
The following Tuesday afternoon
brought to my New York apartment
—for of course Mrs. Raffles did not
give Sikes her right name—an ab-
solutely faultless copy of Mrs. Rock-
erbilt's chiefest glory. It was so like
that none but an expert in gems could
have told the copy from the original,
and when I bore the package back to
Newport and displayed its contents
to my mistress she flew into an
ecstasy of delight.
"We'll have the original in a week
if you keep your nerve, Bunny," she
cried.
"Theatricals?" said I.
"No, indeed," said Henriette. "If
92


Mrs. Raffles
in the dark and manage your elbow
so awkwardly that Mrs. Rockerbilt's
coiffure will be entirely disarranged
by it. She will scream, of course, and
I will instantly restore the light, after
which I will attend to the substitu-
tion. Now don't fail me and the
tiara will be ours."
I stand ready with affidavits to
prove that that dinner was the most
exciting affair of my life. At one
time it seemed to me that I could not
possibly perform my share of the
conspiracy without detection, but a
glance at Henriette, sitting calmly
and coolly, and beautiful too, by gad,
at the head of the table, chatting as
affably with the duke of Snarleyow
and Tommy Dare as though there was
nothing in the wind, nerved me to
action. The moment came, and in-
stantly as I leaned over Mrs. Rocker-
bilt's side with the fish platter in my
hand out went the light; crash went
my elbow into the lady's stunning
94





Mrs. Raffles
that way I will myself restore order
out of this lovely chaos."
The little speech was received with
the usual hilarious appreciation which
follows anything out of the usual
course of events in high social circles.
Tommy Dare gave three cheers for
Mrs. Van Raffles, and Mrs. Gramercy
Van Pelt, clad in a gorgeous red cos-
tume, stood up on a chair and toasted
me in a bumper of champagne. Mean-
while Henriette and Mrs. Rockerbilt
had gone above.
"Isn't it a beauty, Bunny," said
Henriette the next morning, as she
held up the tiara to my admiring
gaze, a flashing, coruscating bit of
the jeweler's art that, I verily believe,
would have tempted the soul of hon-
or itself into rascally ways.
"Magnificent!" I asserted. "But
—which is this, the forty-eight-dol-
lar one or the original?"
"The original," said Henriette, ca-
96


VIII
THE ADVENTURE OF THE CARNEGIE
LIBRARY
MERCIFUL Midas, Bunny," said
Henriette one morning as I was
removing the breakfast-tray from her
apartment. "Did you see the extent
of Mr. Carnegie's benefactions in the
published list this morning?"
"I have not received my paper
yet," said I. "Moreover, I doubt if
it will contain any reference to such
matters when it does come. You
know I read only the London Times,
Mrs. Van Raffles. I haven't been
able to go the American newspa-
pers."
"More fool you, then, Bunny,"
laughed my mistress. "Any man who
99


Mrs. Raffles
wants to pursue crime as a polite
diversion and does not read the
American newspapers fails to avail
himself of one of the most potent in-
struments for the attainment of the
highest artistic results. You cannot
pick up a newspaper in any part of
the land without discovering some-
where in its columns some reference
to a new variety of house-breaking,
some new and highly artistic method
of writing another man's autograph
so that when appended to a check
and presented at his bank it will bear
the closest scrutiny to which the pay-
ing-teller will subject it, some truly
Napoleonic method of entirely novel
design for the sudden parting of t*he
rich from their possessions. Any
university which attempted to add
a School of Peculation to its curric-
ulum and ignored the daily papers
as a positive source of inspiration to
the highest artistry in the profession
would fail as ignobly as though it
ioo


The Carnegie Library
that is not recorded in my book, not
a gem that has appeared at the op-
era, the theatre, the Charity Ball, the
Horse Show, or a monkey dinner that
has not been duly noted in this vade-
mecum of mine, fully described and in
a sense located. If it wasn't for that
knowledge I could not hope for success
any more than you could if you went
hunting mountain-lions in the Desert
of Sahara, or tried to lure speckled-
trout from the depths of an empty
goldfish globe."
"I see," said I, meekly. "I have
missed a great opportunity. I will
subscribe to the Tribune and Evening
Post right away."
I have never understood why Hen-
riette greeted this observation with
a peal of silvery laughter that fairly
made the welkin ring. All I know is
that it so irritated me that I left
the room to keep from making a
retort that might seriously have dis-
turbed our friendship. Later in the
103


Mrs. Raffles
day, Mrs. Van Raffles rang for me
and I attended upon her orders.
"Bunny," said she, "I've made up
my mind to it — I must have a
Carnegie library, that is all there is
about it, and you must help. The
iron-master has already spent thir-
ty - nine million dollars on that
sort of thing, and I don't see why
if other people can get 'em we
can't."
"Possibly because we are not a
city, town, or hamlet," I suggested,
for I had been looking over the daily
papers since my morning's talk with
the lady, and had observed just who
had been the beneficiaries of Mr.
Carnegie's benefactions. "He don't
give 'em to individuals, but to com-
munities."
"Of course not," she responded,
quickly. "But what is to prevent
our becoming a municipality?"
My answer was an amazed silence,
for frankly I could not for the life of
104


Mrs. Raffles
a starter. Go down to Long Island,
buy the farm, put up a few signs call-
ing on people to own their own homes;
advertise the place in big capital let-
ters in the Sunday papers as likely
to be the port of the future, consider
yourself duly elected mayor, stop in
at some photograph shop in New
York on your way back and get a few
dozen pictures of street scenes in
Binghamton, Oberlin, Kalamazoo, and
other well-populated cities, and then
come back here for further instruc-
tions. Meanwhile I will work out the
other details of the scheme."
According to my habit I followed
Henriette's instructions to the letter.
A farm of five hundred acres was
secured within a week, the bleakest,
coldest spot ever swept by ocean
breezes anywhere. It cost six hun-
dred dollars in cash, with immediate
possession. Three days later, with
the use of a ruler, I had mapped out
about twelve thousand corner lots on
106


Mrs. Raffles
Gaster's letter of introduction, I suc-
ceeded. Mr. Carnegie, was as always,
in a most amiable frame of mind, and
received me cordially, even when he
discovered my real business with him.
"I hadn't intended to give any
more libraries this year," he said, as
he glanced over the pictures. "I am
giving away lakes now," he added.
"If you wanted a lake, Mr. Higgin-
botham, I—"
"We have such a large water-front
already, Mr. Carnegie," said I, "and
most of our residents are young
married couples with children not
over three and five. I am afraid they
would regard a lake as a source of
danger."
"That's a.pretty playground," he
suggested, glancing at the Oberlin
Park. "Somehow or other, it re-
minds me of something."
I thought it quite likely, but, of
course, I didn't say so. I may be a
fool but I have some tact.
no





The Carnegie Library
"It's at the far corner of the park
that we propose to put the library if
you are good enough to let us have
it," was all I ventured.
"H'm 1" he mused. "Well, do you
know, I like to help people who help
themselves—that's my system."
I assured him that we of Raffles-
hurst were accustomed to helping our-
selves to everything we could lay our
hands on, a jest which even though it
was only too true seemed to strike
him pleasantly.
"What is that handsome structure
you always pass over?" he asked,
as I contrived to push the music-
hall photograph aside for the fifth
time.
I laughed deprecatingly. "Oh,
that," I said, modestly—"that's only
a little two-hundred-thousand-dollar
music-hall and art gallery I have built
for the town myself."
Oh, that wonderful Henriette!
How did she know that generosity
in


Mrs. Raffles
even among the overgenerous was in-
fectious?
"Indeed!" said Mr. Carnegie, his
face lighting up with real pleasure.
"Well, Mr. Higginbotham, I guess—
I guess I'll do it. I can't be outdone
in generosity by you, sir, and—er—
I guess you can count on the li-
brary. Do you think one hundred
and fifty thousand dollars will be
enough?"
"Well, of course—" I began.
"Why not make my contribution
equal to yours and call it an even
two hundred thousand dollars?" he
interrupted.
"You overwhelm me,'' said I. "Of
course, if you wish to—"
"And the Raffleshurst common
council will appropriate five per cent.
of that amount annually for its main-
tenance?" he inquired.
"Such a resolution has already been
passed," said I, taking a paper from
my pocket. "Here is the ordinance,
112


The Carnegie Library
duly signed by myself as mayor and
by the secretary of the council."
Again that extraordinary woman,
to provide me with so necessary a
document!
The millionaire rose with alacrity
and with his own hand drew me the
required check.
"Mr. Mayor," said he, "I like the
quick, business-like way in which you
do things. Pray present my com-
pliments to the citizens of Raffles-
hurst-by-the-Sea, and tell them I am
only too glad to help them. If you
ever want a lake, sir, don't fail to call
upon me." With which gracious
words the millionaire bowed me out.
"Two hundred thousand dollars,
Bunny?" cried Henriette when I
handed her the check.
"Yep," said I.
"Well, that is a good day's sport!"
she said, gazing at the slip. "Twice
as much as I expected."
"3


IX
THE ADVENTURE OF THE HOLD-UP
NOW that it is all over, I do not
know whether she was really
worn-out or by the expert use of
powder gave to her cheeks the pallid
look which bore out Mrs. Van Raf- •
fles's statement to me that she needed
a rest. At any rate, one morning in
mid-August, when the Newport sea-
son was in full feather, Henriette,
looking very pale and wan, tearfully
confessed to me that business had got
on her nerves and that she was going
away to a rest-cure on the Hudson for
ten days.
"I just can't stand it for another
minute, Bunny," she faltered, real
tears coursing down her cheeks. "I
"5


Mrs. Raffles
haven't slept a wink of natural sleep
for five days, and yet when night
comes it is all I can do to keep my
eyes open. At the Rockerbilt ball
last night I dozed off four times while
talking with the Duchess of Snarleyow,
and when the Chinese Ambassador
asked me to sit out the gavotte with
him I'm told I actually snored in his
face. A woman who can't keep
awake all night and sleep properly by
day is not fit for Newport society,
and I've simply got to go away and
get my nerve back again."
"You are very wise," I replied,
"and I wholly approve of your course.
There is no use of trying to do too
much and you have begun to show
the strain to which you have been
subjecting yourself. Your failure last
Friday night to land Mrs. Gollet's
ruby dog - collar when her French
poodle sat in your lap all through the
Gaster musicale is evidence to me
that your mind is not as alert as
116


Adventure of the Hold-up
usual. By all means, go away and
rest up. I'll take care of things
around here."
"Thank you, dear," said she, with
a grateful smile. "You need a
change too, Bunny. What would you
say if I sent all the servants away
too, so that you could have a week
of absolute tranquillity? It must be
awful for a man of your refined sen-
sibilities to have to associate so con-
stantly with the housemaids, the un-
der-butlers and the footmen."
"Nothing would please me better,"
I returned with alacrity; for, to tell
the truth, society below stairs was
rapidly becoming caviar to my taste.
The housemaids were all right, and
the under - butlers, being properly
subject to my control, I could wither
when they grew too familiar, but the
footmen were intolerable guyers. On
more than one occasion their quick
Irish wit had put me to my trumps to
maintain my dignity, and I had no-
117


Mrs. Raffles
The beauties of Bolivar Lodge had
never so revealed themselves to me
as then; the house as dark as the
tomb without, thanks to the closing
of the shutters and the drawing to
of all the heavy portieres before the
windows, but a blaze of light within
from cellar to roof. I spent whole
hours gloating over the treasures of
that Monte - Cristan treasure - house,
and all day Sunday and Monday I
spent poring over the books in the li-
brary, a marvellous collection, though
for the most part wholly uncut.
Everything moved along serenely
until Wednesday afternoon, when I
thought I heard a noise in the cellar,
but investigation revealed the pres-
ence of no one but a stray cat which
miaowed up the cellar steps to me in
response to my call of "Who's there."
True, I did not go down to see if any
one were there, not caring to involve
myself in a personal encounter with
a chance tramp who might have wan-
no


Mrs. Raffles
something the matter with the elec-
trical service, a fact which I cursed,
but not deeply, for it was a beautiful
moonlight night and while of course I
was disappointed in my reading, I
realized that after all nothing could
be pleasanter than to sit in the moon-
light and smoke and quaff bumpers of
champagne until the crack of doom.
This I immediately proceeded to do,
and kept at it pretty steadily until I
should say about eleven o'clock, when
I heard unmistakable signs of a large
automobile coming up the drive. It
chugged as far as the front-door and
then stood panting like an impatient
steam-engine, while the chauffeur, a
person of medium height, well muf-
fled in his automobile coat, his feat-
ures concealed behind his goggles,
and his mouth covered by his collar,
rapped loudly on the front - door,
once, then a second time.
"Who the devil can this be at this
hour of the night, I wonder," I mut-


Adventure of the Hold-up
tered, as I responded to the sum-
mons.
If I sought the name I was not to
be gratified, for the moment I opened
the door I found two pistols levelled
upon me, and two very determined
eyes peering at me from behind the
goggles.
"Not a word, or I shoot," said the
intruder in a gruff voice, evidently
assumed, before I could get a word
from my already somewhat cham-
pagne-twisted tongue. "Lead me to
the dining-room."
Well, there I was. Defenceless,
taken by surprise, unarmed, not too
wide awake, comfortably filled with
champagne and in no particularly
fighting mood. What could I do but
yield? To call for help would have
brought at least two bullets crashing
into my brain, even if any one could
have heard my cries. To assault a
scoundrel so well-armed would have
been the height of folly, and to tell the
123





Mrs. Raffles
nothing of the exquisite workman-
ship, but—it made me gnash my
teeth in impotent rage to see it—
Henriette's own jewel-box containing
a hundred thousand dollars worth of
her own gems and some thirty thou-
sand dollars in cash, was rifled of its
contents and disposed of similarly to
the silver in the gaping maw of that
damned automobile tonneau.
"Now," said the intruder, loosen-
ing my feet and releasing me from the
chair, "take me to my lady's boudoir.
There is room in the car for a few
more objects of virtu."
I obeyed on the instant and a few
moments later the scene of below-
stairs was repeated, with me power-
less to resist. Pictures, bric-a-brac,
and other things to the tune of
twenty thousand dollars more were
removed, as calmly and as coolly as
though there were no law against that
sort of thing in the world.
"There!" cried the highwayman, as
126


Adventure of the Hold-up
he returned after the last item of his
loot had been stowed away in the
vehicle. "That '11 make an interest-
ing tale for Friday morning's papers.
It's the biggest haul I've made in
forty-eight years. Good-night, sir.
When I am safely out of town I'll
telegraph the police to come and
rescue you from your present awk-
ward position. And let me tell you,
if you give them the slightest hint of
my personal appearance, by the hop-
ping Harcourt, I'll come back and kill
you. See?"
And with that he made off, closing
the door behind him, and a moment
later I heard his infernal automobile
chugging down the drive at full speed.
Twelve hours later, in response to a
long-distance telephone message from
New York, the police came bounding
around to the house, and found me
tied up and unconscious. The high-
wayman had at least been true to his
word, and, as he had prophesied, the
127


Mrs. Raffles
morning papers on Friday were full
of the story of the most daring rob-
bery of the century. Accurate stories
in detail under huge scare-type head-
lines appeared in all the papers, nar-
rating the losses of the Constant-
Scrappes, as well as the rape of the
jewels and money of Mrs. Van Raffles.
The whole country rang with it, and
the afternoon train brought not only
detectives by the score, but the rep-
resentative of the Constant-Scrappes
and Henriette herself. She was high-
ly hysterical over the loss not only
of her own property but that of her
landlord as well, but nobody blamed
me. The testimony of the police as
to my condition when found fully
substantiated my story and was ac-
cepted as ample evidence that I had
no criminal connection with the rob-
bery. This was a great relief to me,
but it was greater when Henriette
stroked my hand and called me "poor
old Bunny," for I must say I was
128


Adventure of the Hold-up
worried as to what she would think of
me for having proven so poor a
guardian of her property.
Since then months have passed and
not a vestige of the stolen property
has been recovered. The Constant-
Scrappes bore their loss with equa-
nimity, as became them, since no one
could have foreseen such a misfortune
as overtook them; and as for Mrs.
Van Raffles, she never mentioned the
matter again to me, save once, and
that set me to thinking.
"He was a clever rascal you say,
Bunny?" she asked one morning.
"Yes," said I. "One of the best
in the business, I fancy."
"A big fellow?" She grinned with
a queer smile.
"Oh, about your height," said I.
"Well, by the hopping Harcourt,"
she retorted, quizzically, "if you give
them the slightest hint of my personal
appearance, I'll come back and kill
you*. See?"
129


Adventure of the Hold-up
it open when I sneaked in to cut off
the electric lights. You mustn't be
so careless, dear, or we may have to
divvy up our spoil with others."
Marvellous woman, that Henriette!


Mrs. Shadd's Musicale
had been reported by Tommy Dare,
the leading Newport authority on
monkeys, that he had heard him play
Brahm's "Variations on Paganini"
with his paws on a piano, "Hiawa-
tha" on a xylophone with his feet,
and "Home, Sweet Home " with his
tail on a harp simultaneously, in
Paris a year ago, and that alongside
of Jockobinski all other musical prod-
igies of the age became mere strum-
mers.
"He's a whole orchestra in him-
self," said Tommy enthusiastically,
"and is the only living creature that I
know of who can tackle a whole sym-
phony without the aid of a hired
man."
Of course society was on the qui
vive for a genius of so riotous an order
as this, and all the wealthy families of
Newport vied with one another for the
privilege of being first to welcome him
to our shores, not because he was a
freak, mind you, but "for art's sweet
133


Mrs. Shadd's Musicale
pletely Mrs. Shadd wrested the lead-
ership from Mrs. Gaster two seasons
ago with her orang outang dinner,
don't you?"
I confessed to having read some-
thing about such an incident in high
society.
"Well," said Henriette, "this would
have thrown that little episode wholly
in the shade. Of course Mrs. Shadd
is doing this to retain her grip, but
it irritates me more than I can say
to have her get it just the same.
Heaven knows I was willing to pay
for it if I had to abscond with a na-
tional bank to get the money."
"It isn't too late, is it?" I queried.
"Not too late?" echoed-Henriette.
"Not too late with Mrs. Shadd's cards
out and the whole thing published in
the papers?"
"It's never too late for a woman of
your resources to do anything she has
a mind to do," said I. "It seems to
me that a person who could swipe a
i3S


Mrs. Raffles
Carnegie library the way you did
should have little difficulty in lifting
a musicale. Of course I don't know
how you could do it, but with your
mind — well, I should be surprised
and disappointed if you couldn't de-
vise some plan to accomplish your
desires."
Henriette was silent for a moment,
and then her face lit up with one of
her most charming smiles.
"Bunny, do you know that at
times, in spite of your supreme stu-
pidity, you are a source of positive
inspiration to me?" she said, looking
at me, fondly, I ventured to think.
"I am glad if it is so," said I.
"Sometimes, dear Henriette, you will
find the most beautiful flowers grow-
ing out of the blackest mud. Per-
haps hid in the dull residuum of my
poor but honest gray matter lies the
seed of real genius that will sprout the
loveliest blossoms of achievement."
"Well, anyhow, dear, you have
136


Mrs. Raffles
name is? About half - past seven
o'clock it was—Wednesday."
"Yes, Bunderby, did carry a note
to you from me on Wednesday," said
Mrs. Shadd. "But—"
"And in it you said that you were
called to Boston by an accident to
your son Willie in his automobile:
that you might not be able to get
back in time for to-night's affair and
wouldn't I take it over," protested
Mrs. Van Raffles, vehemently.
"I?" said Mrs. Shadd, showing
more surprise than was compatible
with her high social position.
"And attend to all the details—
your very words, my dear Pauline,"
said Henriette, with an admirably
timed break in her voice. "And I
did, and / told you I would. I im-
mediately put on my travelling gown,
motored to Providence, had an all-
night ride to New York on a very
uncomfortable sleeper, went at once
to Herr Jockobinski's agent and ar-
144


Mrs. Shadd's MuSicale
ranged the change, notified Sherry to
send the supper to my house instead
of yours, drove to Tiffany's and had
the cards rushed through and mailed
to everybody on your list—you know
you kindly gave me your list when I
first came to Newport—and attended
to the whole thing, and now I come
back to find it all a—er—a mistake!
Why, Pauline, it's positively awful!
What can we do?"
Henriette was a perfect picture of
despair. "I don't suppose we can
do anything now," said Mrs. Shadd,
ruefully. "It's too late. The cards
have gone to everybody. You have
all the supper — not a sandwich
has come to my house — and I
presume all of Mr. Jockobinski's
instruments as well have come
here."
Henriette turned to me.
"All, madame," said I, briefly.
"Well," said Mrs. Shadd, tapping
the floor nervously with her toe. "I
*45


Mrs. Raffles
don't understand it. / never wrote
that note."
"Oh, but Mrs. Shadd—I have it
here," said Henriette, opening her
purse and extracting the paper. "You
can read it for yourself. What else
could I do after that?"
Innocence on a monument could
have appeared no freer of guile than
Henriette at that moment. She
handed the note to Mrs. Shadd, who
perused it with growing amazement.
"Isn't that your handwriting—and
your crest and your paper?" asked
Henriette, appealingly.
"It certainly looks like it," said
Mrs. Shadd. "If I didn't know I
hadn't written it I would have sworn
I had. Where could it have come
from?"
"I supposed it came from Onyx
House," said Henriette simply, glanc-
ing at the envelope.
"Well—it's a very mysterious af-
fair," said Mrs. Shadd, rising, "and
146


Mrs. Shadd's
Musicale
I — oh, well, my dear woman, I — I
can't blame you — indeed, after all
you have done I ought to be—and
really am — very much obliged to
you. Only—"
"Whom did you have at dinner
Wednesday night, dear?" asked Hen-
riette.
"Only the Duke and Duchess of
Snarleyow and—mercy! I wonder if
he could have done it!"
"Who?" asked Henriette.
"Tammy Dare!" ejaculated Mrs.
Shadd, her eyes beginning to twinkle.
"Do you suppose this is one of
Tommy Dare's jokes?"
"H'm!" mused Henriette, and then
she laughed. "It wouldn't be unlike
him, would it?"
"Not a bit, the naughty boy!" cried
Mrs. Shadd. "That's it, Mrs. Van
Raffles, as certainly as we stand here.
Suppose, just to worry him, we never
let on that anything out of the ordi-
nary has happened, eh?"
i47


Mrs. Raffles
"Splendid!" said Henriette, with
enthusiasm. "Let's act as if all
turned out just as we expected, and,
best of all, never even mention it to
him, or to Bunderby his confederate,
neither of us, eh?"
"Never!" said Mrs. Shadd, rising
and kissing Henriette good - bye.
"That's the best way out of it. If
we did we'd be the laughing-stock of
all Newport. But some day in the
distant future Tommy Dare would
better look out for Pauline Shadd,
Mrs. Van Raffles."
And so it was agreed, and Henri-
ette successfully landed Mrs. Shadd's
musicale.
Incidentally, Jockobinski was very
affable and the function went off well.
Everybody was there and no one
would for a moment have thought
that there was anything strange in
the transfer of the scene from Onyx
House to Bolivar Lodge.
"Who wrote that letter, Henriette?"
148


Mrs. Shadd's Musicale
I asked late in the evening when the
last guest had gone.
"Who do you suppose, Bunny, my
boy?" she asked with a grin. "Bun-
derby?"
"No," said I.
"You've guessed right," said Hen-
riette.
As a postscript let me say that until
he reads this I don't believe Tommy
Dare ever guessed what a successful
joke he perpetrated- upon Mrs. Shadd
and the fair Henriette. Even then I
doubt if he realizes what a good one
it was on—everybody.


XI
THE ADVENTURE OF MRS. INNITT's
COOK
"IT is curious, Bunny," said Hen-
1 riette the other morning after an
unusually late breakfast, "to observe
by what qualities certain of these
Newport families have arrived, as the
saying is. The Gasters of course
belong at the top by patent right.
Having invented American society,
or at least the machine that at present
controls it, they are entitled to all the
royalties it brings in. The Rocker-
bilts got there all of a sudden by the
sheer lavishness of their entertain-
ment and their ability to give bonds
to keep it up. The Van Varick
Shadds flowed in through their un-
!5°


Mrs. Innitt's Cook
questioned affiliation with the ever-
popular Delaware Shadds and the
Roe-Shadds of the Hudson, two of
the oldest and most respected fami-
lies of the United States, reinforced
by the Napoleonic qualities of the
present Mrs. Shadd in the doing of un-
expected things. The Gullets, thanks
to the fact that Mrs. Gullet is the
acknowledged mother-in-law of three
British dukes, two Italian counts, and
a French marquis, are safely anchored
in the social haven where they would
be, and the rumor that Mrs. Gushing-
ton-Andrews has written a book that
is a trifle risque fixes her firmly in the
social constellation—but the Innitts
with only eighty thousand dollars per
annum, the Dedbroke - Hickses with
nothing a year, the Oliver-Sloshing-
tons with an income of judgments, the
study of their arrival is mighty inter-
esting."
"It doesn't interest me much,"
quoth I. "Indeed, this American
151


Mrs. Innitt's Cook
"Yes—"
"Well, he got into the swim with
each marriage—so he's got a four-ply
grip," said I.
"And the Dedbroke-Hickses ?" ask-
ed Henriette. "How do you account
for them?"
"Most attractive diners and week-
enders," said I. "They got all the
laughs at your dinner to the Arch-
bishop of Decanterbury, and their man
Smathers tells me they're the swellest
things going at week-end parties be-
cause of his ingenuity at cotillion lead-
ing and her undeniable charms as a
flirt. By Jove! she's that easy with
men that even I tremble with anxiety
whenever she comes into the house."
"But how do they live ? — they
haven't a cent to their names," said
Henriette.
"Simplicity itself," said I. "He
is dressed by his tailors and she by her
dressmaker; and as for food, they take
home a suit-case full of it from every
» i53


Mrs. Raffles
spoken, for my words electrified
her.
"I must have her!" cried Henriette.
"What, Mrs. Innitt?" I asked.
"No—her cook," said Henriette.
I stood aghast. Full of sympathy
as I had always been with the proj-
ects of Mrs. Van Raffles, and never in
the least objecting on moral grounds
to any of her schemes of acquisition,
I could not but think that this time
she proposed to go too far. To rob a
millionaire of his bonds, a national
bank of its surplus, a philanthropist
of a library, or a Metropolitan Box-
holder of a diamond stomacher, all
that seemed reasonable to me and
proper according to my way of look-
ing at it, but to rob a neighbor of her
cook—if there is any worse social
crime than that I don't know what
it is."
"You'd better think twice on that
proposition, Henriette," I advised
with a gloomy shake of the head. "It
iS6


Mrs. Innitt's Cook
is not only a mean crime, but a dan-
gerous one to boot. Success would
in itself bring ruin. Mrs. Innitt would
never forgive you, and society at
large—"
"Society at large would dine with
me instead of with Mrs. Innitt, that's
all," said Henriette. "I mean to
have her before the season's over."
"Well, I draw the line at stealing a
cook," said I, coldly. "I've robbed
churches and I've made way with
fresh-air funds, and I've helped you in
many another legitimate scheme, but
in this, Mrs. Van Raffles, you'll have
to go it alone."
"Oh, don't you be afraid, Bunny,"
she answered. "I'm not going to use
your charms as a bait to lure this
culinary Phyllis into the Arcadia in
which you with your Strephonlike
form disport yourself."
"You oughtn't to do it at all," said
I, gruffly. "It's worse than murder,
for it is prohibited twice in the dec-
i57


Mrs. Innitt's Cook
rusty nail, a piece of gravel from the
drive, two hair-pins, and a steel nut
from the automobile.
"What on earth—" I began, but
she shut me off with an imperious
gesture.
"Do as I tell you," she commanded.
"You are not in on this venture."
And then apparently she relented.
"But I'm willing to tell you just one
thing, Bunny "—here her eyes began
to twinkle joyously—"I'm going to
Mrs. Innitt's to dinner to - morrow
night — so look out for Norah by
Monday."
I turned sulkily away.
"You know how I feel on that
subject," said I. "This business of
going into another person's house as
a guest and inducing their servants
to leave is an infraction of the laws
of hospitality. How would you like
it if Mrs. Gaster stole me away from
you?"
Henriette's answer was a puzzling
i59


Mrs. Raffles
smile. "You are free to better your
condition, Bunny," she said. "But
I am not going to rob Mrs. Innitt, as
I told you once before. She will dis-
charge Norah and I will take her,
that's all; so do be a good boy and
bring me the nail and gravel and the
hair-pins and the automobile nut."
I secured the desired articles for
my mistress, and the next evening
she went to Mrs. Innitt's little dinner
to Miss Gullet and her fianc6, Lord
Dullpate, eldest son of the Duke of
Lackshingles, who had come over to
America to avoid the scrutiny of the
Bankruptcy Court, taking the absurd
objects with her. Upon her return
at 2 a.m. she was radiant and trium-
phant.
"I won out, Bunny—I won out!"
she cried.
"How?" I inquired.
"Mrs. Innitt has discharged Norah,
though I begged her not to," she
fairly sang.
160


Mrs. Innitt's Cook
"On what grounds?"
"Several," said Henriette, unfast-
ening her glove. "To begin with,
there was a rusty nail in my clam
cocktail, and it nearly choked me to
death. I tried hard to keep Mrs.
Innitt from seeing what had happen-
ed, but she is watchful if not brainy,
and all my efforts went for naught.
She was much mortified of course and
apologized profusely. All went well
until the fish, when one of the two
hair-pins turned up in the pompano
to the supreme disgust of my hostess,
who was now beginning to look wor-
ried. Hair-pin number two made its
d6but in my timbale. This was too
much for the watchful Mrs. Innitt,
self-poised though she always is, and
despite my remonstrances she excused
herself from the table for a moment,
and I judge from the flushed appear-
ance of her cheeks when she returned
five minutes later that somebody had
had the riot act read to her somewhere.
161





XII
THE LAST ADVENTURE
IAM bathed in tears. I have tried
to write of my sensations, to tell
the story of the Last Adventure of
Mrs. Van Raffles, in lucid terms, but
though my pen runs fast over the
paper the ink makes no record of the
facts. My woe is so great and so deep
that my tears, falling into the ink-pot,
turn it into a fluid so thin it will not
mark the paper, and when I try the
pencil the words are scarce put down
before they're blotted out. And yet
with all this woe I find myself a multi-
millionaire—possessed of sums so far
beyond my wildest dreams of fortune
that my eye can scarce take in the
breadth of all the figures. My dollars
165


Mrs. Raffles
coined into silver, placed on top of
one another, would form a bullion
tower that would reach higher into
the air than fifteen superimposed
domes of St. Peter's placed on top
of seventeen spires of Trinity on the
summit of Mont Blanc. In five-
pound notes laid side by side they'd
suffice to paper every scrap of bed-
room wall in all the Astor houses in
the world, and invested in Amalga-
mated Copper they would turn the
system green with envy—and yet I am
not happy. My well-beloved Hen-
riette's last adventure has turned my
fortune into bitterest gall, and plain
unvarnished wormwood forms the fin-
ish of my interior, for she is gone! I,
amid the splendor of my new-found
possessions, able to keep not one but
a hundred motor-cars, and to pay the
chauffeur's fines, to endow chairs in
universities, to build libraries in every
hamlet in the land from Podunk to
Richard Mansfield, to eat three meals
166


Mrs. Raffles
been the most ardent admirer of Mrs.
Gushington - Andrews, and Mrs. Con-
stant - Scrappe's devotion to young
Harry de Lakwitz had been at least
for two seasons evident to any ob-
server with half an eye. Gushington-
Andrews had considerately taken
himself out of the way by eloping to
South Africa with Tottie Dimpleton
of the Frivolity Burlesquers, and
Harry de Lakwitz's only recorded
marriage had been annulled by the
courts because at the time of his
wedding to the forty-year-old house-
maid of the Belleville Boarding-School
for Boys at Skidgeway, Rhode Island,
he was only fifteen years of age. Con-
sequently, they both were eligible,
and provided the Constant-Scrappes
could be so operated on by the laws
of South Dakota as to free them from
one another, there were no valid rea-
sons why the yearnings of these ardent
souls should not all be gratified. In-
deed, both engagements had been
168


The Last Adventure
announced tentatively, and only the
signing of the decree releasing the
Constant-Scrappes from their obliga-
tions to one another now stood in the
way of two nuptial ceremonies which
would make four hearts beat as one.
Mrs. Gushington-Andrews's trousseau
was ready, and that of the future Mrs.
de Lakwitz had been ordered; both
ladies had received their engagement
rings when that inscrutable Henriette
marked Constant-Scrappe for her own.
Colonel Scrappe had returned from
Monte Carlo, having broken the bank
twice, and Henriette had met him at a
little dinner given in his honor by Mrs.
Gushington-Andrews. He turned out
to be a most charming man, and it
didn't require a much more keen per-
ception than my own to take in the
fact that he had made a great im-
pression upon Henriette, though she
never mentioned it to me until the
final blow came. I merely noticed a
growing preoccupation in her manner
ia 169


Mrs. Raffles
and in her attitude towards me, which
changed perceptibly.
"I think, Bunny," she said to me
one morning as I brought her marma-
lade and toast, "that considering our
relations to each other you should
not call me Henriette. After all, you
know, you are here primarily as my
butler, and there are some proprieties
that should be observed even in this
Newport atmosphere."
"But," I protested, "am I no more
than that? I am your partner, am I
not?"
"You are my business partner—
not my social, Bunny," she said. "We
must not mix society and business.
In this house I am mistress of the
situation; you are the butler—that is
the precise condition, and I think it
well that hereafter you should rec-
ognize the real truth and avoid over-
familiarity by addressing me as Mrs.
Van Raffles. If we should ever open
an office for our Burglary Company in
170


The Last Adventure
New York or elsewhere you may call
me anything you please there. Here,
however, you must be governed by
the etiquette of your environment.
Let it be Mrs. Van Raffles hereafter."
"And is it to be Mr. Bunny?" I in-
quired, sarcastically.
Her response was a cold glance of
the eye and a majestic sweep from the
room.
That evening Colonel Scrappe call-
ed, ostensibly to look over the house
and as landlord to see if there was
anything he could do to make it more
comfortable, and I, blind fool that I
was for the moment, believed that
that was his real errand, and ventured
to remind Henriette of the leak in the
roof, at which they both, I thought,
exchanged amused glances, and he
gravely mounted the stairs to the top
of the house to look at it. On our
return, Henriette dismissed me and
told me that she would not require
my services again during the evening.
171


Mrs. Raffles
Even then my suspicions were not
aroused, although there was a dull, dis-
turbed feeling about my heart whose
precise causes I could not define. I
went to the club and put in a miser-
able evening, returning home about
midnight to discover that Colonel
Scrappe was still there. He was ap-
parently giving the house and its
contents a thorough inspection, for
when I arrived, Henriette was testing
the fifty-thousand-dollar piano in the
drawing-room for him with a brilliant
rendering of "O Promise Me." What
decision they reached as to its tone
and quality I never knew, for in spite
of my hints on the subject, Henriette
never spoke of'the matter to me. I
suppose I should have begun to guess
what was happening under my very
nose then, but thank Heaven I am not
of a suspicious nature, and although
I didn't like the looks of things, the in-
evitable meaning of their strange be-
havior never even dawned upon my
172



"henriette was testing the fifty-thousand-dollar piano


Mrs. Raffles
ton-Andrews. The latter came to a
card-party at Bolivar Lodge one after-
noon about two weeks after Colonel
Scrappe's return, and her greeting
to her hostess instead of having the
old-time effusiveness was frigid to a
degree. In fact, when they clasped
hands I doubt if more than the tips
of their fingers touched. Moreover,
Mrs. Gushington - Andrews, hitherto
considered one of the best fists at
bridge or hearts in the 400, actually
won the booby prize, which I saw her
throw into the street when she de-
parted . It was evident something had
happened to disturb her equanimity.
My eyes were finally opened by a
remark made at the club by Digby,
Reggie de Pelt's valet, who asked
me how I liked my new boss, and
whose explanation of the question
led to a complete revelation of the
true facts in the case. Everybody
knew, he said, that from the moment
she had met him Mrs. Van Raffles had
i74


The Last Adventure
set her cap for Colonel Scrappe, and
that meeting her for the first time
he had fallen head over heels in love
with her even in the presence of his
fiancee. Of course I hotly denied
Digby's insinuations, and we got so
warm over the discussion that when I
returned home that night I had two
badly discolored eyes, and Digby—
well, Digby didn't go home at all.
Both of us were suspended from the
Gentleman's Gentleman's Club for
four weeks for ungentleman's un-
gentlemanly behavior in consequence.
Black as my eyes were, however, I
was on hand at the breakfast-table
the following morning, and of course
Henriette observed my injuries.
"Why, Bunny!" she cried. "What
is the meaning of this? Have you
been fighting?"
"Oh no, Mrs. Van Raffles," I re-
turned, sarcastically, " I've just strain-
ed my eyes reading the divorce news
from South Dakota."
i7S


Mrs. Raffles
She gave a sudden start.
"What do you mean?" she de-
manded, her face flushing hotly.
"You know well enough what I
mean," I retorted, angrily. "Your
goings on with Colonel Scrappe are
the talk of the town, and I got these
eyes in a little discussion of your mat-
rimonial intentions. That's all."
"Leave the room instantly!" she
cried, rising and haughtily pointing to
the door. "You are insufferable."
But the color in her cheeks showed
that I had hit home far harder than
she was willing to admit. There was
nothing for me to do but to obey
meekly, but my blood was up, and in-
stead of moping in my room I started
out to see if I could find Constant-
Scrappe. My love for Henriette was
too deep to permit of my sitting
quietly by and seeing another walk
away with the one truly coveted prize
of my life, and I was ready on sight
to take the colonel by the collar—
176


The Last Adventure
he was only a governor's-staff colonel
anyhow, and, consequently no great
shakes as a fighter—and throw him
into the harbor, but my quest was a
vain one. He was to be found in
none of his familiar haunts, and I re-
turned to Bolivar Lodge. And then
came the shock. As I approached
the house I saw the colonel assisting
Henriette into the motor-car, and in
response to the chauffeur's " Where to,
sir," I heard Scrappe reply in an ex-
cited undertone:
"To New York—and damn the
speed laws."
In a moment they had rushed by
me like the flash of a lightning ex-
press, and Henriette was gone!
You must know the rest. The
papers the next day were full of the
elopement in high life. They told
how the Scrappe divorce had been
granted at five o'clock in the after-
noon the day before, how Colonel
Scrappe and Mrs. Van Raffles had
i77


Mrs. Raffles
sped to New York in the automobile
and been quietly married at the Little
Church Around the Corner, and were
now sailing down the bay on the
Hydrostatic, bound for foreign climes.
They likewise intimated that a very
attractive lady of more than usual
effusiveness of manner, whose nuptials
were expected soon to be published
for the second time, had gone to a
sanitarium in Philadelphia to be
treated for a sudden and overwhelm-
ing attack of nervous hysteria.
It was all too true, that tale. Hen-
riette's final coup had been successful,
and she had at one stroke stolen her
landlord, her landlady's husband, and
her neighbor's fiance. To console me
she left this note, written on board of
the steamer and mailed by the pilot.
Dear Bunny,—I couldn't help it. The
minute I saw him I felt that I must have
On Board the Hydrostatic,
Off Sandy Hook, September 10. 1004.

178








The Last Adventure
him. It's the most successful haul yet
and is the last adventure I shall ever have.
He's worth forty million dollars. I'm
sorry for you, dear, but it's all in the line
of business. To console you I have left
in your name all that we have won to-
gether in our partnership at Newport—
fourteen millions five hundred and sixty-
three thousand nine hundred and seventy-
seven dollars in cash, and about three
million dollars in jewels, which you must
negotiate carefully. Good-bye, dear Bun-
ny, I shall never forget you, and I wish
you all the happiness in the world. With
the funds now in your possession why not
retire—go home to England and renew
your studies for the ministry? The Church
is a noble profession.
Sincerely yours,
Henriette Van Raffles-Scrappe.
I have gathered together these
meagre possessions — rich in bullion
value, but meagre in happiness, con-
sidering all that might have been,
and to - morrow I sail for London.
There, following Henriette's advice, I
shall enter the study of the ministry,
179








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