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Copyright, 1016,
By RAND MCNALLY & 00.
Tu! RAND~MCNALLY Pnass
CHICAGO
D-21


THE CONTENTS
ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND
PAGI
Dedication. . . . . . . . . . . . . . II
cum“
I. DowN THE RABBIT-HOLE . . . . . . . . . 13
II. TIIE POOL or TEARS . . . . . . . . . . 21
III. A CAucUs-RAcE AND A LONG TALE . . . . . . 28
IV. THE RABBIT SENDs IN A LITTLE BILL . . . . . 35
V. ADvIcE FROM A CATERPILLAR . . . . . . . . 44
VI. PIG AND PEPPER 53
VII. A MAD TEA-PARTY . 63
VIII. TIIE QUEEN'S CRoQuET GROUND . 72
IX. THE Mocx TURTLE's STORY . . . . . . . . 81
X. TIIE LoEsTER-QUADRILLE . . . . . . . . . 90
XI. WHO STOLE THE TARTs? . . . . . . . . . 98
XII. ALIcE's EvIDENcE . . . . . . . . . . . I06





ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN
WONDERLAND





“I? --| \g ‘I. \
"- J15: . "
All in the golden afternoon
Full leisurely we glide;
For both our oars, with little skill,
By little arms are plied,
While little hands make vain pretense
Our wanderings to guide.
Ah, cruel Three! In such an hour,
Beneath such dreamy weather,
To beg a tale of breath too weak
To stir the tiniest feather!
Yet what can one poor voice avail
Against three tongues together?
Imperious Prima flashes forth
Her edict “to begin it":
In gentler tones Secunda hopes
“ There will be nonsense in it!"
While Tertia interrupts the tale
Not more than once a minute.
Anon, to sudden silence won,
In fancy they pursue
The dream-child moving through a land
0f wonders wild anaI new,
In friendly chat with bird br beast —
And half believe it true.


And ever, as the story drained
The wells of fancy dry,
And faintly strove that weary one
To put the subject by,
“The rest next time—" “It is next time!"
The happy voices cry.
Thus grew the tale of Wonderland:
Thus slowly, one by one,
Its quaint events were hammered out —
And now the tale is done,
And home we steer, a merry crew,
Beneath the setting sun.
Alice! A childish story take,
And, with a gentle hand,
Lay it where Childhood's dreams are twined
In Memory's mystic band,
Like pilgrim's wither'd wreath of flowers
Pluck'd in a far-ofl land.


ALICE'S ADVENTURES
IN WONDERLAND
CHAPTER I
DOWN THE RABBIT—HOLE
LICE was beginning to get very tired of sitting by
her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to
do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her
sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conver-
sations in it, “and what is the use of a book," thought
Alice, “without pictures or conversations?"
So she was considering, in her own mind (as well as
she could, for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and
stupid), whether the pleasure of making a daisy-chain
would be worth the trouble of getting up and picking
the daisies, when suddenly a white rabbit with pink eyes
ran close by her.
There was nothing so very remarkable in that; nor
did Alice think it so very much out of the way to hear
the Rabbit say to itself, “Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall
be too late!" (when she thought it over afterwards, it
occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this,
but at the time it all seemed quite natural); but, when
the Rabbit actually took a watch out of his waistcoat-
pocket, and looked at it, and then hurried on, Alice
I3


I4 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she
had never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-
pocket, or a watch to take out of it, and, burning with
curiosity, she ran across the field after it, and was just in
time to see it pop down a large rabbit-hole under the hedge.
In another moment down went Alice after it, never
once considering how in the world she was to get out
again.
The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for
some way, and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly
that Alice had not a moment to think about stopping
herself before she found herself falling down what seemed
to be a very deep well.
Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly,
for she had plenty of time as she went down to look
about her, and to wonder what was going to happen
next. First,’ she tried to look down and make out what
she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything:
then she looked at the sides of the well, and noticed
that they were filled with cupboards and book-shelves:
here and there she saw maps and pictures hung upon
pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves
as she passed: it was labeled “ORANGE MARMA-
LADE," but to her great disappointment it was empty:
she did not like to drop the jar, for fear of killing some-
body underneath, so managed to put it into one of the
cupboards as she fell past it.
“Well!" thought Alice to herself. “After such a fall
as this, I shall think nothing of tumbling down-stairs!
How brave they'll all think me at home! Why, I
would n't say anything about it, even if I fell off the
top of the house!" (Which was very likely true.)


IN WONDERLAND I5
Down, down, down. Would the fall never come to
an end? “I wonder how many miles I 've fallen by this
time?" she said aloud. “I must be getting somewhere
near the center of the earth. Let me see: that would be
four thousand miles down, I think—" (for, you see,
Alice had learnt several things of this sort in her lessons
in the school-room, and though this was not a very good
opportunity for showing ofi her knowledge, as there was
no one to listen to her, still it was good practice to say
it over) “—yes, that's about the right distance—but
then I wonder what Latitude or Longitude I've got to?"
(Alice had not the slightest idea what Latitude was, or
Longitude either, but she thought they were nice grand
words to say.)
Presently she began again. “I wonder if I shall
fall right through the earth! How funny it'll seem to
come out among the people that walk with their heads
downwards! The Antipathies, I think—" (she was
rather glad there was no one listening, this time, as it
did n't sound at all the right word) “—but I shall have
to ask them what the name of the country is, you know.
Please, Ma'am, is this New Zealand? Or Australia?"
(And she tried to curtsey as she spoke—fancy, curt-
seying as you're falling through the air! Do you think
you could manage it?) “And what an ignorant little
girl she'll think me for asking! No, it'll never do to
ask: perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere."
Down, down, down. There was nothing else to do,
so Alice soon began talking again. “Dinah 'll miss me
very much to-night, I should think!" (Dinah was the
cat.) “I hope they'll remember her saucer of milk
at tea-time. Dinah, my dear! I wish you were down


I6 _ ALICE'S ADVENTURES
here with me! There are no mice in the air, I'm afraid,
but you might catch a bat, and that's very like a mouse,
you know. But do cats eat bats, I wonder?" And
here Alice began to get rather sleepy, and went on saying
to herself, in a dreamy sort of way, “Do cats eat bats?
Do cats eat bats?" and sometimes “Do bats eat cats?"
for, you see, as she could n't answer either question, it
did n't much matter which way she put it. She felt
that she was dozing 0E, and had just begun to dream
that she was walking hand in hand with Dinah, and
was saying to her, very earnestly, “Now, Dinah, tell
me the truth: did you ever eat a bat?" when suddenly,
thump! thump! down she came upon a heap of sticks
and dry leaves, and the fall was over.
Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up on to
her feet in a moment: she looked up, but it was all dark
overhead: before her was another long passage, and the
White Rabbit was still in sight, hurrying down it. There
was not a moment to be lost: away went Alice like the
wind, and was just in time to hear it say, as it turned a
corner, “ Oh my ears and whiskers, how late it 's getting!"
She was close behind it when she turned the corner, but
the Rabbit was no longer to be seen: she found herself
in a long, low hall, which was lit up by a row of lamps
hanging from the roof.
There were doors all round the hall, but they were
all locked; and when Alice had been all the way down
one side and up the other, trying every door, she walked
sadly down the middle, wondering how she was ever to
get out again.
Suddenly she came upon a little three-legged table,
all made of solid glass: there was nothing on it but a



Page I3
When the Rabbi! look a watch out of his waistcoal-porkel, Alice started
to her feel ’





IN WONDERLAND I7
tiny golden key, and Alice's first idea was that this might
belong to one of the doors of the hall; but, alas! either
the locks were too large, or the key was too small, but
at any rate it would not open any of them. However,
on the second time round, she came upon a low curtain
she had not noticed before, and behind it was a little
door about fifteen inches high: she tried the little golden
key in the lock, and to her great delight it fitted!
Alice opened the door and found that it led into a
small passage, not much larger than a rat-hole: she
knelt down and looked along the passage into the loveliest
garden you ever saw. How she longed to get out of that
dark hall, and wander about ‘among those beds of bright
flowers and those cool fountains, but she could not even
get her head through the doorway; “ and even if my head
would go through," thought poor Alice, “it would be of
very little use without my shoulders. Oh, how I wish
I could shut up like a telescope! I think I could, if I
only knew how to begin." For, you see, so many out-
of-the-way things had happened lately, that Alice had
begun to think that very few things indeed were really
impossible.
There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little
door, so she went back to the table, half hoping she might
find another key on it, or at any rate a book of rules for
shutting people up like telescopes: this time she found
a little bottle on it (“ which certainly was not here before,"
said Alice), and tied round the neck of the bottle was
a paper label, with the words “DRINK ME " beautifully
printed on it in large letters.
It was all very well to say “Drink me," but the wise
little Alice was not going to do that in a hurry. “No,
2


I8 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
I'll look first," she said, “and see whether it's marked
‘poison' or not"; for she had read several nice little
stories about children who had got burnt, and eaten up
by wild beasts, and other unpleasant things, all because
they would not remember the simple rules their friends
had taught them: such as, that a red-hot poker will
burn you if you hold it too long; and that, if you cut your
finger very deeply with a knife, it usually bleeds; and she
had never forgotten that, if you drink much from a
bottle marked “poison," it is almost certain to disagree
with you, sooner or later.
However, this bottle was not marked “poison," so
Alice ventured to taste it, and, finding it very nice (it
had, in fact, a sort of mixed flavor of cherry-tart, custard,
pine-apple, roast turkey, tofiee, and hot buttered toast),
she very soon finished it ofi.
O O O O
O O Q
Q Q 0 i
“What a curious feeling!" said Alice. “I must be
shutting up like a telescope!"
And so it was indeed: she was now only ten inches
high, and her face brightened up at the thought that she
was now the right size for going through the little door
into that lovely garden. First, however, she waited
for a few minutes to see if she was going to shrink any
further: she felt a little nervous about this; “for it
might end, you know," said Alice to herself, ‘ ‘ in my going
out altogether, like a candle. I wonder what I should
be like then?" And she tried to fancy what the flame
of a candle looks like after the candle is blown out, for
she could not remember ever having seen such a thing.


IN WONDERLAND I9
After a while, finding that nothing more happened,
she decided on going into the garden at once; but, alas
for poor Alice! when she got to the door, she found she
had forgotten the little golden key, and when she went
back to the table for it, she found she could not possibly
reach it: she could see it quite plainly through the glass,
and she tried her best to climb up one of the legs of the
table, but it was too slippery; and when she had tired
herself out with trying, the poor little thing sat down
and cried.
“Come, there's no use in crying like that!" said Alice
to herself rather sharply. “I advise you to leave ofi
this minute!" She generally gave herself very good
advice (though she very seldom followed it), and some-
times she scolded herself so severely as to bring tears
into her eyes; and once she remembered trying to box
her own ears for having cheated herself in a game of
croquet she was playing against herself, for this curious
child was very fond of pretending to be two people.
“But it 's no use now," thought poor Alice, “to pretend
to be two people! Why, there 's hardly enough of me
left to make one respectable person!"
Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was lying
under the table: she opened it, and found in it a very
small cake, on which the words “EAT ME" were
beautifully marked in currants. “Well, I'll eat it,"
said Alice, “and if it makes me grow larger, I can reach
the key; and if it makes me grow smaller, I can creep
under the door: so either way I'll get into the garden,
and I don't care which happens!"
She ate a little bit, and said anxiously to herself,
“Which way? Which way?" holding her hand on the


2o ALICE'S ADVENTURES
top of her head to feel which way it was growing; and
she was quite surprised to find that she remained the
same size. To be sure, this is what generally happens
when one eats cake; but Alice had got so much into the
way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to
happen, that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to
go on in the common way.
So she set to work, and very soon finished off the cake.
* t # #
i i 8
C O O '


CHAPTER II
THE POOL OF TEARS
“ URIOUSER and curiouser!" cried Alice (she was
so much surprised, that for the moment she quite
forgot how to speak good English). “Now I 'm opening
out like the largest telescope that ever was! Good-by,
feet!" (for when she looked down at her feet, they seemed
to be almost out of sight, they were getting so far off).
“Oh, my poor little feet, I wonder who will put on your
shoes and stockings for you now, dears? I'm sure I
shan't be able! I shall be a great deal too far off to
trouble myself about you: you must manage the best
way you can—but I must be kind to them," thought
Alice, “or perhaps they won't walk the way I want to
go! Let me see. I'll give them a new pair of boots
every Christmas."
And she went on planning to herself how she would
manage it. “They must go by the carrier," she thought;
“and how funny it'll seem, sending presents to one's
own feet! And how odd the directions will look!
Alice's Right Foot, Esq.,
Hearthrug,
near the Fender,
(with Alice's love).
Oh dear, what nonsense I'm talking!"
Just at this moment her head struck against the roof
of the hall: in fact she was now rather more than nine
31:


IN WONDERLAND 23
But if I'm not the same, the next question is ‘Who in
the world am I?' Ah, that 's the great puzzle!" And
she began thinking over all the children she knew that
were of the same age as herself, to see if she could have
been changed for any of them.
“I'm sure I'm not Ada," she said, “for her hair goes
in such long ringlets, and mine does n't go in ringlets
at all; and I ‘m sure I can't be Mabel, for I know all sorts
of things, and she, oh, she knows such a very little!
Besides, she's she, and I 'm I, and—oh dear, how puz-
zling it all is! I'll try if I know all the things I used to
know. Let me see: four times five is twelve, and four
times six is thirteen, and four times seven is—oh dear!
I shall never get to twenty at that rate! However, the
Multiplication-Table does n't signify: let's try Geogra-
phy. London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the
capital of Rome, and Rome—no, that's all wrong, I'm
certain! I must have been changed for Mabel! I'll
try and say ‘How doth the little—'," and she crossed her
hands on her lap, as if she were saying lessons, and began
to repeat it, but her voice sounded hoarse and strange,
and the words did not come the same as they used to do:-
“How doth the little crocodile
Improve his shining tail,
And pour the waters of the Nile
On every golden scale!
“How cheerfully he seems to grin,
How neatly spreads his claws,
And welcomes little fishes in,
With gently smiling jaws! "


IN WONDERLAND 25
never was so small as this before, never! And I declare
it's too bad, that it is!"
As she said these words her foot slipped, and in
another moment, splash! she was up to her chin in salt-
water. Her first idea was that she had somehow fallen
into the sea, “and in that case I can go back by railway,"
she said to herself. (Alice had been to the seaside once
in her life, and had come to the general conclusion that,
wherever you go to on the English coast, you find a
number of bathing-machines in the sea, some children
digging in the sand with wooden spades, then a row of
lodging-houses, and behind them a railway-station.)
However, she soon made out that she was in the pool of
tears which she had wept when she was nine feet high.
“I wish I had n't cried so much!" said Alice, as she
swam about, trying to find her way out. “I shall be
punished for it now, I suppose, by being drowned in my
own tears! That will be a queer thing, to be sure!
However, everything is queer to-day."
Just then she heard something splashing about in
the pool a little way off, and she swam nearer to make
‘out what it was: at first she thought it must be a walrus
or hippopotamus, but then she remembered how small
she was now, and she soon made out that it was only a
mouse, that had slipped in like herself.
“Would it be of any use, now," thought Alice, “to
speak to this mouse? Everything is so out-of-the-way
down here, that I should think very likely it can talk:
at any rate, there's no harm in trying." So she began:
“ 0 Mouse, do you know the way out of this pool? I am
very tired of swimming about here, 0 Mouse!" (Alice
thought this must be the right way of speaking to a


26 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
mouse: she had never done such a thing before, but she
remembered having seen, in her brother's Latin Gram-
mar, “A mouse—of a mouse—to a mouse—a mouse—
0 mouse!") The Mouse looked at her rather inquisi-
tively, and seemed to her to wink with one of its little
eyes, but said nothing.
“Perhaps it does n't understand English," thought
Alice. , “I dare say it's a French mouse, come over with
William the Conqueror." (For, with all her knowledge
of history, Alice had no very clear notion how long ago
anything had happened.) So she began again: “0a
est ma chatte?" which was the first sentence in her
French lesson-book. The Mouse gave a sudden leap
out of the water, and seemed to quiver all over with
fright. “Oh, I beg your pardon!" cried Alice hastily,
afraid that she had hurt the poor animal's feelings. “I
quite forgot you did n't like cats."
“Not like cats!" cried the Mouse in a shrill, pas-
sionate voice. “Would you like cats, if you were me?"
“Well, perhaps not," said Alice in a soothing tone:
“don't be angry about it. And yet I wish I could show
you our cat Dinah. I think you'd take a fancy to cats
if you could only see her. She is such a dear quiet
thing," Alice went on, half to herself, as she swam lazily
about in the poo , “and sits purring so nicely by the fire,
licking her paws and washing her face—and she is such
a nice soft thing to nurse—and she's such a capital
one for catching mice oh, I beg your pardon!"
cried Alice again, for this time the Mouse was bris-
tling all over, and she felt certain it must be really
offended. “We won't talk about her any more, if
you'd rather not."


IN WONDERLAND 27
“We, indeed!" cried the Mouse, who was trembling
down to the end of its tail. “As if I would talk on such
a subject! Our family always hated cats: nasty, low,
vulgar things! Don't let me hear the name again!”
“I won't indeed!" said Alice, in a great hurry to
change the subject of conversation. “Are you—are
you fond—of —-of dogs?" The Mouse did not answer,
so Alice went on eagerly: “There is such a nice little
dog, near our house, I should like to show you! A little
bright-eyed terrior, you know, with oh, such long curly
brown hair! And it'll fetch things when you throw
them, and it'll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts
of things—I can't remember half of them—and it
belongs to a farmer, you know, and he says it's so useful,
it 's worth a hundred pounds! He says it kills all the
rats and—oh dear!" cried Alice in a sorrowful tone.
“I'm afraid I've offended it again!" For the Mouse
was swimming away from her as hard as it could go, and
making quite a commotion in the pool as it went.
So she called softly after it, “Mouse dear! Do come
back again, and we won't talk about cats, or dogs either,
if you don't like them!" When the Mouse heard this,
it turned round and swam slowly back to her: its face
was quite pale (with passion, Alice thought), and it
said, in a low trembling voice, “Let us get to the shore,
and then I'll tell you my history, and you'll understand
why it is I hate cats and dogs."
It was high time to go, for the pool was getting quite
crowded with the birds and animals that had fallen into
it: there was a Duck and a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet,
and several other curious creatures. Alice led the way,
and the whole party swam to the shore.


IN WONDERLAND 29
had been of late much accustomed to usurpation and
conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of Mercia and
Northumbria ———' "
“Ugh!" said the Lory, with a shiver.
“I beg your pardon!" said the Mouse, frowning, but
very politely. “Did you speak?"
“Not I!" said the Lory, hastily.
“I thought you did," said the Mouse. “I proceed.
‘Edwin and Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northum-
bria, declared for him; and even Stigand, the patriotic
archbishop of Canterbury, found it advisable —' "
“Found what?" said the Duck.
“Found it," the Mouse replied rather crossly: “of
course you know what ‘it' means."
“I know what ‘it' means well enough when I find
a thing," said the Duck: “it's generally a frog or a
worm. The question is, what did the archbishop find?"
The Mouse did not notice this question, but hur-
riedly went on, “ ‘— found it advisable to go with Edgar
Atheling to meet William and offer him the crown.
William's conduct at first was moderate. But the
insolence of his Normans——' How are you getting
on now, my dear?" it continued, turning to Alice as it
spoke.
“As wet as ever," said Alice in a melancholy tone:
“it does n't seem to dry me at all."
“In that case," said the Dodo solemnly, rising to
its feet, “I move that the meeting adjourn, for the
immediate adoption of more energetic remedies "
“Speak English!" said the Eaglet. “I don't know
the meaning of half those long words, and, what's more,
I don't believe you do either!" And the Eaglet bent


3o ALICE'S ADVENTURES
down its head to hide a smile: some of the other birds
tittered audibly.
“What I was going to say," said the Dodo in an
oflended tone, “was, that the best thing to get us dry
would be a Caucus-race."
“What is a Caucus-race?" said Alice; not that she
much wanted to know, but the Dodo had paused as if
it thought that somebody ought to speak, and no one
else seemed inclined to say anything.
“Why," said the Dodo, “the best way to explain
it is to do it." (And, as you might like to try the thing
yourself, some winter-day, I will tell you how the Dodo
managed it.)
First it marked out a race-course, in a sort of circle
(“the exact shape does n't matter," it said), and then
all the party were placed along the course, here and
there. There was no “One, two, three, and away!" but
they began running when they liked, and left off when
they liked, so that it was not easy to know when the
race was over. However, when they had been running
half an hour or so, and were quite dry again, the Dodo
suddenly called out, “The race is over!" and they all
crowded round it, panting. and asking, “But who has
won?"
This question the Dodo could not answer without a
great deal of thought, and it sat for a long time with
one finger pressed upon its forehead (the position in
which you usually see Shakespeare, in the pictures of
him), while the rest waited in silence. At last the Dodo
said, “Everybody has won, and all must have prizes."
“But who is to give the prizes?" quite a chorus of
voices asked.


IN WONDERLAND 3I
“Why, she, of course," said the Dodo, pointing to Alice
with one finger; and the whole party at once crowded round
her, calling out, in a confused way, “Prizes! Prizes!"
Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair she put
her hand in her pocket, and pulled out a box of comfits
(luckily the salt water had not got into it), and handed
them round as prizes. There was exactly one apiece,
all round.
“But she must have a prize herself, you know,"
said the Mouse.
“Of course," the Dodo replied very gravely. “What
else have you got in your pocket?" he went on, turning
to Alice.
“Only a thimble," said Alice sadly.
“Hand it over here," said the Dodo.
Then they all crowded round her once more, while
the Dodo solemnly presented the thimble, saying, “We
beg your acceptance of this elegant thimble"; and when
it had finished this short speech, they all cheered.
Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, but they
all looked so grave that she did not dare to laugh; and,
as she could not think of anything to say, she simply
bowed, and took the thimble, looking as solemn as she
could.
The next thing was to eat the comfits: this caused
some noise and confusion, as the large birds complained
that they could not taste theirs, and the small ones
choked and had to be patted on the back. However,
it was over at last, and they sat down again in a ring,
and begged the Mouse to tell them something more.
‘ ‘ You promised to tell me your history, you know," said
Alice, “and why it is you hate—C and D," she added


32 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
in a whisper, half afraid that it would be offended again.
“Mine is a long and a sad tale!" said the Mouse,
turning to Alice, and sighing.-
“ It is a long tail, certainly," said Alice, looking down
with wonder at the Mouse's tail; “but why do you call it
sad?" And she kept on puzzling about it while the Mouse
was speaking, so that her idea of the tale was something
like this: — “Fury said to
a mouse, That
he met in the
house, ‘Let
us both go
to law: I
will prose-
cute you.—-
Come, I'll
take no de-
nial: We
must have
the trial;
For really
this morn-


IN WONDERLAND 33
“You are not attending!" said the Mouse to Alice,
severely. “What are you thinking of?"
“I beg your pardon," said Alice very humbly: “you
had got to the fifth bend, I think?"
“I had not!" cried the Mouse, sharply and very
angrily.
“A knot!" said Alice, always ready to make herself
useful, and looking anxiously about her. “Oh, do let
me help to undo it!"
“I shall do nothing of the sort," said the Mouse,
getting up and walking away. “You insult me by
talking such nonsense!"
“I didn't mean it!" pleaded poor Alice. “But
you're so easily offended, you know!"
The Mouse only growled in reply.
“Please come back, and finish your story!" Alice
called after it. And the others all joined in chorus,
“Yes, please do!" But the Mouse only shook its head
impatiently, and walked a little quicker.
“What a pity it would n't stay!" sighed the Lory,
as soon as it was quite out of sight. And an old Crab
took the opportunity of saying to her daughter, “Ah,
my dear! Let this be a lesson to you never to lose your
temper!" “Hold your tongue, Ma!" said the young
Crab, a little snappishly. “You're enough to try the
patience of an oyster!"
“I wish I had our Dinah here, I know I do!" said
Alice aloud, addressing nobody in particular. “She 'd
soon fetch it back!"
“And who is Dinah, if I might venture to ask the
question?" said the Lory.
Alice replied eagerly, for she was always ready to
3


34 ALICE’S ADVENTURES
talk about her pet: “Dinah's our cat. And she's
such a capital one for catching mice, you can't think!
And oh, I wish you could see her after the birds! Why,
she'll eat a little bird as soon as look at it!"
This speech caused a remarkable sensation among
the party. Some of the birds hurried off at once: one
old magpie began wrapping itself up very carefully,
remarking, “I really must be getting home: the night-
air does n't suit my throat!" And a Canary called out
in a trembling voice, to its children, “Come away, my
dears! It's high time you were all in bed!" On various
pretexts they all moved off, and Alice was soon left
alone.
“I wish I had n't mentioned Dinah!" she said to
herself in a melancholy tone. “Nobody seems to like
her, down here, and I'm sure she's the best cat in the
world! Oh, my dear Dinah! I wonder if I shall ever
see you any more!" And here poor Alice began to cry
again, for she felt very lonely and low-spirited. In a
little while, however, she again heard a little pattering
of footsteps in the distance, and she looked up eagerly,
half hoping that the Mouse had changed his mind, and
was coming back to finish his story.


CHAPTER IV
THE RABBIT SENDS IN A LITTLE BILL
TWAS the White Rabbit, trotting slowly back again,
and looking anxiously about as it went, as if it had
lost something; and she heard it muttering to itself,
“The Duchess! The Duchess! Oh my dear paws! Oh
my fur and whiskers! She'll get me executed as sure as
ferrets are ferrets! Where can I have dropped them, I
wonder?" Alice guessed in a moment that it was looking
for the fan and the pair of white kid-gloves, and she
very good-naturedly began hunting about for them,
but they were nowhere to be seen —everything seemed
to have changed since her swim in the pool; and the
great hall, with the glass table and the little door, had
vanished completely.
Very soon the Rabbit noticed Alice, as she went
hunting about, and called out to her, in an angry tone,
“Why, Mary Ann, what are you doing out here? Run
home this moment, and fetch me a pair of gloves and a
fan! Quick, now!" And Alice was so much frightened
that she ran off at once in the direction it pointed to,
without trying to explain the mistake that it had
made.
“He took me for his housemaid," she said to herself
as she ran. “How surprised he'll be when he finds out
who I am! But I'd better take him his fan and gloves —-
that is, if I can find them." As she said this, she came
upon a neat little house, on the door of which was
35


36 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
a bright brass plate with the name “W. RABBIT"
engraved upon it. She went in without knocking, and
hurried upstairs, in great fear lest she should meet the
real Mary Ann, and be turned out of the house before
she had found the fan and gloves.
“How queer it seems," Alice said to herself, “to be
going messages for a rabbit! I suppose Dinah 'll be
sending me on messages next!" And she began fancying
the sort of thing that would happen: “ ‘Miss Alice!
Come here directly, and get ready for your walk!'
‘Coming in a minute, nurse! But I've got to watch
this mouse-hole till Dinah comes back, and see that the
mouse does n't get out.' Only I don't think," Alice
went on, “that they 'd let Dinah stop in the house if it
began ordering people about like that!"
By this time she had found her way into a tidy little
room with a table in the window, and on it (as she had
hoped) a fan and two or three pairs of tiny white kid-
gloves: she took up the fan and a pair of the gloves,
and was just going to leave the room, when her eye fell
upon a little bottle that stood near the looking-glass.
There was no label this time with the words “DRINK
ME," but nevertheless she uncorked it and put it to her
lips. “I know something interesting is sure to happen,"
she said to herself, “whenever I eat or drink anything:
so I'll just see what this bottle does. I do hope it'll
. make me grow large again, for really I'm quite tired of
being such a tiny little thing!"
It did so indeed, and much sooner than she had
expected: before she had drunk half the bottle, she
found her head pressing against the ceiling, and had to
stoop to save her neck from being broken. She hastily


IN WONDERLAND 37
put down the bottle, saying to herself, “That 's quite
enough—I hope I shan't grow any more—As it is,
I can't get out at the door—I do wish I had n't drunk
quite so much!"
Alas! It was too late to wish that! She went on
growing, and growing, and very soon had to kneel down
on the floor: in another minute there was not even room
for this, and she tried the effect of lying down with one
elbow against the door, and the other arm curled round
her head. Still she went on growing, and, as a last
resource, she put one arm out of the window, and one
foot up the chimney, and said to herself, “Now I can
do no more, whatever happens. What will become of
me?"
Luckily for Alice, the little magic bottle had now
its full effect, and she grew no larger: still it was very
uncomfortable, and, as there seemed to be no sort of
chance of her ever getting out of the room again, no
wonder she felt unhappy.
“It was much pleasanter at home," thought poor
Alice, “when one was n't always growing larger and
smaller, and being ordered about by mice and rabbits.
I almost wish I had n't gone down that rabbit-hole—
and yet—a.nd yet—it's rather curious, you know, this
sort of life! I do wonder what can have happened to
me! When I used to read fairy tales, I fancied that
kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in
the middle of one! There ought to be a book written
about me, that there ought! And when I grow up, I'll
write one—but I'm grown up now," she added in a
sorrowful tone: “at least there 's no room to grow up
any more here."


38 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“But then," thought Alice, “shall I never get any
older than I am now? That '11 be a comfort, one way-
never to be an old woman —but then —always to have
lessons to learn! Oh, I should n't like that! "
“Oh, you foolish Alice!" she answered herself.
“How can you learn lessons in here? Why, there 's
hardly room for you, and no room at all for any lesson-
books!"
And so she went on, taking first one side and then
the other, and making quite a conversation of it alto-
gether; but after a few minutes she heard a voice outside,
and stopped to listen.
“Mary Ann! Mary Ann!" said the voice. “Fetch
me my gloves this moment!" Then came a little patter-
ing of feet on the stairs. Alice knew it was the Rabbit
coming to look for her, and she trembled till she shook
the house, quite forgetting that she was now about a
thousand times as large as the Rabbit, and had no reason
to be afraid of it.
Presently the Rabbit came up to the door, and tried
to open it; but, as the door opened inwards, and Alice's
elbow was pressed hard against it, that attempt proved
a failure. Alice heard it say to itself, “Then I'll go
round and get in at the window."
“That you won't!" thought Alice, and, after waiting
till she fancied she heard the Rabbit just under the win-
dow, she suddenly spread out her hand, and made a
snatch in the air. She did not get hold of anything, but
she heard a little shriek and a fall, and a crash of broken
glass, from which she concluded that it was just possible
it had fallen into a cucumber-frame, or something of
the sort.


IN WONDERLAND 39
Next came an angry voice—the Rabbit's—“Pat!
Pat! Where are you?" And then a. voice she had never
heard before, “Sure then I'm here! Digging for apples,
yer honor!"
“ Digging for apples, indeed!" said the Rabbit angrily.
“Here! Come and help me out of this! " (Sounds of
more broken glass.)
“Now tell me, Pat, what's that in the window?"
“Sure, it's an arm, yer honor!" (He pronounced
it “arrum."
“An arm, you goose! Who ever saw one that size?
Why, it fills the Whole window!"
“Sure, it does, yer honor: but it's an arm for all
that."
“Well, it's got no business there, at any rate: go
and take it away!"
There was a long silence after this, and Alice could
only hear whispers now and then; such as “Sure, I don't
like it, yer honor, at all, at all!" “Do as I tell you, you
coward!" and at last she spread out her hand again,
and made another snatch in the air. This time there
were two little shrieks, and more sounds of broken glass.
“What a number of cucumber-frames there must be!"
thought Alice. “I wonder what they'll do next! As
for pulling me out of the window, I only wish they could!
I'm sure I don't want to stay in here any longer!"
She waited for some time without hearing anything
more: at last came a rumbling of little cart-wheels,
and the sound of a good many voices all talking together:
she made out the words: “ Where's the other ladder? —
Why, I had n't to bring but one. Bill's got the other—
Bill! fetch it here, lad!—Here, put 'em up at this



Page 40
"So Bill's got to come down the chimney, has he?"


IN WONDERLAND 4I
“So you did, old fellow!" said the others.
“We must burn the house down!" said the Rabbit's
voice. And Alice called out, as loud as she could, “If
you do, I'll set Dinah at you!"
There was a dead silence instantly, and Alice thought
to herself, “I wonder what they will do next! If they
had any sense, they'd take the roof ofi." After a minute
or two, they began moving about again, and Alice heard
the Rabbit say, “A barrowful will do, to begin with."
“A barrowful of what? " thought Alice. But she had
not long to doubt, for the next moment a shower of
little pebbles came rattling in at the window, and some
of them hit her in the face. “I'll put a stop to this,"
she said to herself, and shouted out, “You'd better not
do that again!" which produced another dead silence.
Alice noticed, with some surprise, that the pebbles
were all turning into little cakes as they lay on the floor,
and a bright idea came into her head. “If I eat one of
these cakes," she thought, “it's sure to make some
change in my size; and, as it can't possibly make me
larger, it must make me smaller, I suppose."
So she swallowed one of the cakes, and was delighted
to find that she began shrinking directly. As soon as
she was small enough to get through the door, she ran
out of the house, and found quite a crowd of little ani-
mals and birds waiting outside. The poor little Lizard,
Bill, was in the middle, being held up by two guinea-
pigs, who were giving it something out of a bottle. They
all made a rush at Alice the moment she appeared; but
she ran off as hard as she could, and soon found herself
safe in a thick wood.
“The first thing I 've got to do," said Alice to herself,


42 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
as she wandered about in the wood, “is to grow to my
right size again; and the second thing is to find my way
into that lovely garden. I think that will be the best
plan."
It sounded an excellent plan, no doubt, and very
neatly and simply arranged: the only difficulty was,
that she had not the smallest idea how to set about it;
and, while she was peering about anxiously among the
trees, a little sharp bark just over her head made her
look up in a great hurry.
An enormous puppy was looking down at her with
large round eyes, and feebly stretching out one paw,
trying to touch her. “Poor little thing!" said Alice,
in a coaxing tone, and she tried hard to whistle to it;
but she was terribly frightened all the time at the thought
that it might be hungry, in which case it would be very
likely to eat her up in spite of all her coaxing.
Hardly knowing what she did, she picked up a little
bit of stick, and held it out to the puppy: whereupon
the puppy jumped into the air off all its feet at once,
with a yelp of delight, and rushed at the stick, and made
believe to worry it: then Alice dodged behind a great
thistle, to keep herself from being run over; and, the
moment she appeared on the other side, the puppy
made another rush at the stick, and tumbled head over
heels in its hurry to get hold of it: then Alice, thinking
it was very like having a game of play with a carthorse,
and expecting every moment to be trampled under its
feet, ran round the thistle again: then the puppy began
a series of short charges at the stick, running a. very
little way forwards each time and a long way back, and
barking hoarsely all the while, till at last it sat down a


IN WONDERLAND 43
good way off, panting, with its tongue hanging out of
its mouth, and its great eyes half shut.
This seemed to Alice a good opportunity for making
her escape: so she set off at once, and ran till she was
quite tired and out of breath, and till the puppy's bark
sounded quite faint in the distance.
“And yet what a dear little puppy it was!" said
Alice, as she leant against a buttercup to rest herself,
and fanned herself with one of the leaves. “I should
have liked teaching it tricks very much, if —if I'd
only been the right size to do it! Oh dear! I'd nearly
forgotten that I've got to grow up again! Let me see —-
how is it to be managed? I suppose I ought to eat or
drink something or other; but the great question is
‘What?' "
The great question certainly was “what?" Alice
looked all round her at the flowers and the blades of
grass, but she could not see anything that looked like
the right thing to eat or drink under the circumstances.
There was a large mushroom growing near her, about
the same height as herself; and, when she had looked
under it, and on both sides of it, and behind it, it occurred
to her that she might as well look and see what was on
the top of it.
She stretched herself up on tiptoe, and peeped over
the edge of the mushroom, and her eyes immediately
met those of a large blue caterpillar, that was sitting
on the top, with its arms folded, quietly smoking a long
hookah, and taking not the smallest notice of her or of
anything else.


CHAPTER V
ADVICE FROM A CATERPILLAR
HE Caterpillar and Alice looked at each other for
some time in silence: at last the Caterpillar took
the hookah out of its mouth, and addressed her in a
languid, sleepy voice.
“Who are you?" said the Caterpillar.
This was not an encouraging opening for a conver-
sation. Alice replied, rather shyly, “ I — I hardly know,
sir, just as present — at least I know who I was when
I got up this morning, but I think I must have been
changed several times since then."
“What do you mean by that?" said the Cater-
pillar, sternly. “Explain yourself!"
“I can't explain myself, I'm afraid, sir," said Alice.
“because I'm not myself, you see."
“I don't see," said the Caterpillar.
“I 'm afraid I can't put it more clearly," Alice replied,
very politely, “for I can't understand it myself, to begin
with; and being so many difierent sizes in a day is very
confusing." ’
“It is n't," said the Caterpillar.
“Well, perhaps you have n't found it so yet," said
Alice, “but when you have to turn into a chrysalis —
you will some day, you know — and then after that
into a butterfly, I should think you'll feel it a little queer,
won't you?"
“Not a bit," said the Caterpillar.
44


IN WONDERLAND 45
“Well, perhaps your feelings may be different," said
Alice: “all I know is, it would feel very queer to me."
“You!" said the Caterpillar contemptuously. “Who
are you?"
Which brought them back again to the beginning
of the conversation. Alice felt a little irritated at the
Caterpillar's making such very short remarks, and she
drew herself up and said, very gravely, “I think you
ought to tell me who you are, first."
“Why?" said the Caterpillar.
Here was another puzzling question; and, as Alice
could not think of any good reason, and the Caterpillar
seemed to be in a very unpleasant state of mind, she
turned away.
“Come back!" the Caterpillar called after her. “I've
something important to say!"
This sounded promising, certainly. Alice turned and
came back again.
“Keep your temper," said the Caterpillar.
“Is that all?" said Alice, swallowing down her anger
as well as she could.
“N 0," said the Caterpillar.
Alice thought she might as well wait, as she had
nothing else to do, and perhaps after all it might tell
her something worth hearing. For some minutes it
pufied away without speaking; but at last it unfolded
its arms, took the hookah out of its mouth again, and
said, “So you think you're changed, do you?"
“I'm afraid I am, sir," said Alice. “I can't remem-
ber things as I used —and I don't keep the same size
for ten minutes together!"
“Can't remember what things?" said the Caterpillar.


IN WONDERLAND 47
“ You are old," said the youth, “one would hardly suppose
That your eye was as steady as ever;
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose —
What made you so awfully clever?"
“I have answered three questions, and that is enough,"
Said his father. “Don't give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stufl'?
Be of, or I'll kick you down-stairs!"
“That is not said right," said the Caterpillar.
“Not quite right, I'm afraid," said Alice, timidly:
“some of the words have got altered."
“It is wrong from beginning to end," said the Cater-
pillar, decidedly; and there was silence for some minutes.
The Caterpillar was the first to speak.
“What size do you want to be?" it asked.
“Oh, I'm not particular as to size," Alice hastily re-
plied;“ only one does n't like changing so often, you know."
“I don't know," said the Caterpillar.
Alice said nothing: she had never been so much
contradicted in all her life before, and she felt that she
was losing her temper.
“Are you content now?" said the Caterpillar.
“Well, I should like to be a little larger, sir, if you
would n't mind," said Alice: “three inches is such a
wretched height to be."
“It is a very good height indeed!" said the Cater_
pillar angrily, rearing itself upright as it spoke (it was
exactly three inches high).
“But I'm not used to it!" pleaded poor Alice in a
piteous tone. And she thought to herself, “I wish the
creatures would n't be so easily ofiended!"


48 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“You'll get used to it in time," said the Caterpillar;
and it put the hookah into its mouth, and began smoking
again. ‘
This time Alice waited patiently until it chose to
speak again. In a minute or two the Caterpillar took
the hookah out of its mouth, and yawned once or twice,
and shook itself. Then it got down off the mushroom,
and crawled away into the grass, merely remarking, as
it went, “One side will make you grow taller, and the
other side will make you grow shorter."
“One side of what? The other side of what?"
thought Alice to herself.
“Of the mushroom," said the Caterpillar, just as if
she had asked it aloud; and in another moment it was
out of sight.
Alice remained looking thoughtfully at the mush-
room for a minute, trying to make out which were the
two sides of it; and as it was perfectly round, she found
this a very difficult question. However, at last she
stretched her arms around it as far as they would go,
and broke off a bit of the edge with each hand.
“And now which is which?" she said to herself, and
nibbled a little of the right-hand bit to try the effect.
The next moment she felt a violent blow underneath her
chin: it had struck her foot!
She was a good deal frightened by this very sudden
change, but she felt that there was no time to be lost,
as she was shrinking rapidly: so she set to work at once
to eat some of the other bit. Her chin was pressed so
closely against her foot, that there was hardly room to
open her mouth; but she did it at last, and managed to
swallow a morsel of the left-hand bit.



Page 47
is a very good height indeed!" said the Caterpillar angrily
‘I





IN WONDERLAND 49
U i ii * *
O O 8 * #
“Come, my head 's free at last!" said Alice in a tone
of delight, which changed into alarm in another moment,
when she found that her shoulders were nowhere to be
found: all she could see, when she looked down, was an
immense length of neck, which seemed to rise like a
stalk out of a sea of green leaves that lay far below her.
“What can all that green stuff be?" said Alice.
“And where have my shoulders got to? And oh, my poor
hands, how is it I can't see you?" She was moving
them about, as she spoke, but no result seemed to follow,
except a little shaking among the distant green leaves.
As there seemed to be no chance of getting her hands
up to her head, she tried to get her head down to them,
and was delighted to find that her neck would bend about
easily in any direction, like a serpent. She had just
succeeded in curving it down into a graceful zigzag, and
was going to dive in among the leaves, which she found
to be nothing but the tops of the trees under which she
had been wandering, when a sharp hiss made her draw
back in a hurry: a large pigeon had flown into her face,
and was beating her violently with its wings.
“Serpent!" screamed the Pigeon. .
“I'm not a serpent!" said Alice indignantly. “Let
me alone!"
“Serpent, I say again!" repeated the Pigeon, but in a
more subdued tone, and added, with a kind of sob, “ I 've
tried every way, but nothing seems to suit them!"
“ I have n't the least idea what you're talking about,"
said Alice.
4


5o ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“I've tried the roots of trees, and I've tried banks,
and I've tried hedges," the Pigeon went on, without
attending to her; “but those serpents! There 's no
pleasing them!"
Alice was more and more puzzled, but she thought
there was no use in saying anything more till the Pigeon
had finished.
“As if it was n't trouble enough hatching the eggs, .
said the Pigeon; “but I must be on the lookout for ser-
pents, night and day! Why, I have n't had a wink of
sleep these three weeks!"
“I'm very sorry you've been annoyed," said Alice,
who was beginning to see its meaning.
“And just as I 'd taken the highest tree in the wood,"
continued the Pigeon, raising its voice to a shriek, “and
just as I was thinking I should be free of them at last,
they must needs come wriggling down from the sky!
Ugh, Serpent!"
“But I'm not a serpent, I tell you!" said Alice.
“I’m a——I'm a—"
“Well! What are you?" said the Pigeon. “I can
see you're trying to invent something!"
“I — I'm a little girl," said Alice, rather doubtfully,
as she remembered the number of changes she had gone
through, that day.
“A likely story indeed!" said the Pigeon, in a tone
of the deepest contempt. “I 've seen a good many little
girls in my time, but never one with such a neck as that!
No, no! You're a serpent; and there's no use denying
it. I suppose you'll be telling me next that you never
tasted an egg!" ’ 4
“I have tasted eggs, certainly," said Alice, who’wa's


IN WONDERLAND 5I
a very truthful child; “but little girls eat eggs quite as
much as serpents do, you know."
“I don't believe it," said the Pigeon; “but if they do,
why, then they 're a kind of serpent: that's all I can say."
This was such a new idea to Alice, that she was quite
silent for a minute or two, which gave the Pigeon the
opportunity of adding, “You're looking for eggs, I know
that well enough; and what does it matter to me whether
you're a little girl or a serpent?"
“It matters a good deal to me," said Alice hastily;
“but I'm not looking for eggs, as it happens; and, if I
was, I shouldn't want yours: I don't like them raw."
“Well, be off, then!" said the Pigeon in a sulky
tone, as it settled down again into its nest. Alice
crouched down among the trees as well as she could,
for her neck kept getting entangled among the branches,
and every now and then she had to stop and untwist it.
After a while she remembered that she still held the
pieces of mushroom in her hands, and she set to work
very carefully, nibbling first at one and then at the other,
and growing sometimes taller, and sometimes shorter,
until she had succeeded in bringing herself down to her
usual height.
It was so long since she had been anything near the
right size, that it felt quite strange at first; but she got
used to it in a few minutes, and began talking to herself,
as usual, “Come, there's half my plan done now! How
puzzling all these changes are! I'm never sure what
I'm going to be, from one minute to another! However,
I've got back to my right size: the next thing is, to get
into that beautiful garden — how is that to be done,
I wonder?" As she said this, she came suddenly upon


52 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
an open place, with a little house in it about four feet
high. “Whoever lives there," thought Alice, “it'll
never do to come upon them this size: why, I should
frighten them out of their wits!" So she began nibbling
at the right-handbit again, and did not venture to go
near the house till she had brought herself down to nine
inches high.


54 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
Alice went timidly up to the door, and knocked.
“There 's no sort of use in knocking," said the Foot-
man, “and that for two reasons. First, because I'm
on the same side of the door as you are: secondly, because
they're making such a noise inside, no one could possibly
hear you." And certainly there was a most extraordinary
noise going on within —a constant howling and sneez-
ing, and every now and than a great crash, as if a dish
or kettle had been broken to pieces.
“Please, then," said Alice, “how am I to get in?"
“There might be some sense in your lmocking,"
the Footman went on, without attending to her, “if we
had the door between us. For instance, if you were
inside, you might knock, and I could let you out, you
know." He was looking up into the sky all the time he
was speaking, and this Alice thought decidedly uncivil.
“But perhaps he can't help it," she said to herself; “his
eyes are so very nearly at the top of his head. But at
any rate he might answer questions.— How am I to
get in?" she repeated, aloud.
“I shall sit here," the Footman remarked, “till
to-morrow ——"
At this moment the door of the house opened, and a
large plate came skimming out, straight at the Footman's
head: it just grazed his nose, and broke to pieces against
one of the trees behind him.
“ — or next day, maybe," the Footman continued
in the same tone, exactly as if nothing had happened.
“How am I to get in?" asked Alice again, in a louder
tone.
“Are you to get in at all?" said the Footman.
“That's the first question, you know."


IN WONDERLAND 55
It was, no doubt: only Alice did not like to be told
so. “It's really dreadful," she muttered to herself,
“the way all the creatures argue. It's enough to drive
one crazy!"
The Footman seemed to think this a good oppor-
tunity for repeating his remark, with variations. “I
shall sit here," he said, “on and off, for days and days."
“But what am I to do?" said Alice.
“Anything you like," said the Footman, and began
whistling.
“Oh, there's no use in talking to him," said Alice
desperately: “he's perfectly idiotic!" And she opened
the door and went in.
The door led right into a large kitchen, which was
full of smoke from one end to the other: the Duchess
was sitting on a three-legged stool in the middle, nursing
a baby: the cook was leaning over the fire, stirring a
large caldron which seemed to be full of soup.
“There 's certainly too much pepper in that soup!"
Alice said to herself, as well as she could for sneezing.
There was certainly too much of it in the air. Even
the Duchess sneezed occasionally; and as for the baby,
it was sneezing and howling alternately without a mo-
ment's pause. The only two creatures in the kitchen
that did not sneeze were the cook, and a large cat, which
was sitting on the hearth and grinning from ear to ear.
“ Please would you tell me," said Alice, a little tirnidly,
for she was not quite sure whether it was good manners
for her to speak first, “why your cat grins like that?"
“It's a Cheshire-Ca ," said the Duchess, “and
that's why. Pig!"
She said the last word with such sudden violence


56 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
that Alice quite jumped; but she saw in another moment
that it was addressed to the baby, and not to her, so she
took courage, and went on again:-
“I did n't know that Cheshire-Cats always grinned;
in fact, I did n't know that cats could grin."
“They all can," said the Duchess; “and most of
'em do."
“I don't know of any that do," Alice said very po-
litely, feeling quite pleased to have got into a conversation.
“You don't know much," said the Duchess; “and
that's a fact."
Alice did not at all like the tone of this remark, and
thought it would be as well to introduce some other
subject of conversation. While she was trying to fix on
one, the cook took the caldron of soup off the fire, and
at once set to work throwing everything within her reach
at the Duchess and the baby — the fire-irons came first;
then followed a shower of saucepans, plates, and dishes.
The Duchess took no notice of them even when they hit
her; and the baby was howling so much already, that
it was quite impossible to say whether the blows hurt
it or not.
“Oh, please mind what you're doing!" cried Alice,
jumping up and down in an agony of terror. “Oh,
there goes his precious nose!" as an unusually large
saucepan flew close by it, and very nearly carried it off.
“If everybody minded their own business,” said the
Duchess, in a hoarse growl, “the world would go round
a deal faster than it does."
“Which would not be an advantage," said Alice,
who felt very glad to get an opportunity of showing off
a little of her knowledge. “Just think what work it








IN WONDERLAND 57
would make with the day and night! You see the earth
takes twenty-four hours to turn round on its axis —"
“Talking of axes," said the Duchess, “chop Off her
head!"
Alice glanced rather anxiously at the cook, to see if
she meant to take the hint; but the cook was busily
stirring the soup, and seemed not to be listening, so she
went on again: “Twenty-four hours. I think; or is it
twelve? I —"
“Oh, don't bother me!" said the Duchess. “I
never could abide figures!" And with that she began
nursing her child again, singing a sort of lullaby to it
as she did so, and giving it a violent shake at the end
of every line:-
“Speak roughly to your little boy,
And beat him when he sneezes:
He only does it to annoy,
Because he knows it teases."
CHORUS
(in which the cook and the babv ioined) :—
“ Wow! wow! wow!"
While the Duchess sang the second verse of the song,
she kept tossing the baby violently up and down, and
the poor little thing howled so, that Alice could hardly
hear the words: —
“I speak severely to my boy,
I beat him when he sneezes,
For he can thoroughly enjoy
The pepper when he pleases!"


58 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
CHORUS
“Wow! wow! wow!"
“Here! You may nurse it a bit, if you like!" the
Duchess said to Alice, flinging the baby at her as she
spoke. “I must go and get ready to play croquet with
the Queen," and she hurried out of the room. The cook
threw a frying-pan after her as she went, but it just
missed her.
Alice caught the baby with some difficulty, as it
was a queer-shaped little creature, and held out its arms
and legs in all directions, “just like a star-fish," thought
Alice. The poor little thing was snorting like a steam-
engine when she caught it, and kept doubling itself up
and straightening itself out again, so that altogether,
for the first minute or two, it was as much as she could
do to hold it.
As soon as she had made out the proper way of
nursing it (which was to twist it up into a sort of knot,
and then keep tight hold of its right ear and left foot, so
as to prevent its undoing itself), she carried it out into
the open air. “If I don't take this child away with
me," thought Alice, “they're sure to kill it in a day or
two. Would n't it be murder to leave it behind?"
She said the last words out loud, and the little thing
grunted in reply (it had left off sneezing by this time).
“Don't grunt," said Alice; “that's not at all a proper
way of expressing yourself."
The baby grunted again, and Alice looked very
anxiously into its face to see what was the matter with
it. There could be no doubt that it had a very turn-up
nose, much more like a snout than a real nose: also its


IN WONDERLAND 59
eyes were getting extremely small for a baby: altogether
Alice did not like the look of the thing at all. “But per-
haps it was only sobbing," she thought, and looked into
its eyes again, to see if there were any tears.
No, there were no tears. “If you're going to turn
into a pig, my dear," said Alice, seriously, “I'll have
nothing more to do with you. Mind now!" The poor
little thing sobbed again (or grunted, it was impossible
to say which), and they went on for some while in silence.
Alice was just beginning to think to herself, “Now,
what am I to do with this creature, when I get it home?"
when it grunted again, so violently, that she looked down
into its face in some alarm. This time there could be
no mistake about it: it was neither more nor less than a
pig, and she felt that it would be quite absurd for her to
carry it any farther.
So she set the little creature down, and felt quite
relieved to see it trot away quietly into the wood. “If
it had grown up," she said to herself, “it would have
made a dreadfully ugly child: but it makes rather a hand-
some pig, I think." And she began thinking over other
children she knew, who might do very well as pigs, and
was just saying to herself “if one only knew the right
way to change them —" when she was a little startled
by seeing the Cheshire-Cat sitting on a bough of a tree
a few yards off.
The Cat only grinned when it saw Alice. It looked
good-natured, she thought: still it had very long claws
and a great many teeth, so she felt that it ought to be
treated with respect.
“Cheshire-Puss," she began, rather timidly, as she
did not at all know whether it would like the name:


IN WONDERLAND 6I
when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased.
N ow I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when
I 'm angry. Therefore I 'm mad."
“I call it purring, not growling," said Alice.
“ Call it what you like," said the Cat. “ Do you play
croquet with the Queen to-day?"
“I should like it very much," said Alice, “but I
have n't been invited yet."
“You '11 see me there," said the Cat, and vanished.
Alice was not much surprised at this, she was getting
so well used to queer things happening. While she was
still looking at the place where it had been, it suddenly
appeared again.
“By-the-bye, what became of the baby?" said the
Cat. “I 'd nearly forgotten to ask."
“It turned into a pig," Alice answered very quietly,
just as if the Cat had come back in a natural way.
“I thought it would," said the Cat, and vanished
again.
Alice waited a little, half expecting to see it again,
but it did not appear, and after a minute or two she
walked on in the direction in which the March Hare was
said to live. “I've seen hatters before," she said to
herself: “the March Hare will be much the most inter-
esting, and perhaps, as this is May, it won't be raving
mad—at least not so mad as it was in March." As
she said this, she looked up, and there was the Cat
again, sitting on a branch of a tree.
“Did you say ‘pig' or ‘fig'?" said the Cat.
“I said ‘ pig,’ "replied Alice; “and I wish you would n't
keep appearing and vanishing so suddenly: you make one
quite giddy!"


62 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“All right," said the Cat; and this time it vanished
quite slowly, beginning with the end of its tail, and
ending with the grin, which remained some time after
the rest of it had gone.
“Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin," thought
Alice; “but a grin without a cat! It's the most curious
thing I ever saw in all my life!" \
She had not gone much farther before she came in
sight of the house of the March Hare: she thought it
must be the right house, because the chimneys were
shaped like ears and the roof was thatched with fur. It
was so large a house, that she did not like to go nearer
till she had nibbled some more of the left-hand bit of
mushroom, and raised herself to about two feet high:
even then she walked up towards it rather tirnidly,
saying to herself, “Suppose it should be raving mad
after all! I almost wish I'd gone to see the Hatter
instead!"


CHAPTER VII
A MAD TEA— PARTY
HERE was a table set out under a tree in front of
the house, and the March Hare and the Hatter were
having tea at it: a Dormouse was sitting between them,
fast asleep, and the other two were using it as a cushion,
resting their elbows on it, and talking over its head.
“Very uncomfortable for the Dormouse," thought
Alice; “only as it 's asleep, I suppose it does n't mind."
The table was a large one, but the three were all
crowded together at one corner of it. “No room! No
room!" they cried out when they saw Alice coming.
“There 's plenty of room!" said Alice indignantly, and
she sat down in a large arm-chair at one end of the table.
“Have some wine," the March Hare said in an
encouraging tone.
Alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing
on it but tea. “I don't see any wine," she remarked.
“There is n't any," said the March Hare.
“Then it was n't very civil of you to offer it," said
Alice angrily.
“It wasn't very of you to sit down without
being invited," said the March Hare.
“I did n't know it was your table," said Alice: “it's
laid for a great many more than three."
“Your hair wants cutting," said the Hatter. He
had been looking at Alice for some time with great
curiosity, and this was his first speech.
63


64 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“You should learn not to make personal remarks,"
Alice said with some severity: “it's very rude."
The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on hear-
ing this; but all he said was, “Why is a raven like a
writing-desk?"
“Come, we shall have some fun now!" thought Alice.
“I’m glad they've begun asking riddles — I believe I
can guess that," she added aloud.
“Do you mean that you think you can find out the
answer to it?" said the March Hare.
“Exactly so," said Alice.
“Then you should say what you mean," the March
Hare went on.
“I do," Alice hastily replied; “at least —at least I
mean what I say- that 's the same thing, you know."
“Not the same thing a bit!" said the Hatter. “Why,
you might just as well say that ‘I see what I eat' is the
same thing as ‘I eat what I see'!"
“You might just as well say," added the March
Hare, “that ‘I like what I get' is the same thing as ‘I get
what I like'! "
“You might just as well say," added the Dormouse,
who seemed to be talking in his sleep, “that ‘I breathe
when I sleep' is the same thing as ‘I sleep when I breathe' !"
“It is the same thing with you," said the Hatter, and
here the conversation dropped, and the party sat silent
for a minute, while Alice thought over all she could
remember about ravens and writing-desks, which was n't
much.
The Hatter was the first to break the silence. “What
day of the month is it?" he said, turning to Alice: he
had taken his watch out of his pocket, and was looking


IN WONDERLAND 65
at it uneasily, shaking it every now and then, and holding
it to his ear.
Alice considered a little, and then said, “ The fourth."
“Two days wrong!" sighed the Hatter. “I told you
butter would n't suit the works!" he added, looking
angrily at the March Hare.
“It was the best butter," the March Hare meekly
replied.
“Yes, but some crumbs must have got in as well,"
the Hatter grumbled: “you should n't have put it in with
the bread-knife."
The March Hare took the watch and looked at it
gloomily: then he dipped it into his cup of tea, and looked
at it again: but he could think of nothing better to say
than his first remark, “It was the best butter, you know."
Alice had been looking over his shoulder with some
curiosity. “What a funny watch!" she remarked.
“It tells the day of the month, and does n't tell what
o'clock it is!"
“Why should it?" muttered the Hatter. “Does
yourwatch tell you what year it is?"
“Of course not," Alice replied very readily: “but
that 's because it stays the same year for such a long time
together."
“Which is just the case with mine," said the Hatter.
Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hatter's remark
seemed to her to have no sort of meaning in it, and yet
it was certainly English. “I don't quite understand
you," she said, as politely as she could.
“The Dormouse is asleep again," said the Hatter,
and he poured a little hot tea upon its nose.
The Dormouse shook its head impatiently, and said,
5


66 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
without opening its eyes, “ Of course, of course: just what
I was going to remark myself." ’
“Have you guessed the riddle yet?" the Hatter said,
turning to Alice again.
“No, I give it up," Alice replied. “What's the
answer?"
"I have n't the slightest idea," said the Hatter.
“Nor I," said the March Hare.
Alice sighed wearily. “I think you might do some-
thing better with the time," she said, “than wasting it
in asking riddles that have no answers."
“ If you knew Time as well as I do," said the Hatter,
“you would n't talk about wasting it. It 's him."
“I don't know what you mean," said Alice.
“Of course you don't!" the Hatter said, tossing his
head contemptuously. “I dare say you never even spoke
to Time!"
“Perhaps not," Alice cautiously replied; “but I
know I have to beat time when I learn music."
“Ah! That accounts for it," said the Hatter.
“He won't stand beating. Now, if you only kept on
good terms with him, he'd do almost anything you liked
with the clock. For instance, suppose it were nine
o'clock in the morning, just time to begin lessons: you'd
only have to whisper a hint to Time, and round goes the
clock in a twinkling! Half-past one, time for dinner!"
(“I only wish it was," the March Hare said to itself
in a whisper.)
“ That would be grand, certainly," said Alice thought-
fully; “but then—I should n't be hungry for it, you
know."
“Not at first, perhaps," said the Hatter: “but you


IN WONDERLAND 67
could keep it to half-past one as long as you liked."
“Is that the way you manage?" Alice asked.
The Hatter shook his head mournfully. “Not I!"
he replied. “We quarreled last March — just before
he went mad, you know —" (pointing with his teaspoon
at the March Hare) “ — it was at the great concert
given by the Queen of Hearts, and I had to sing
‘ Twinkle, twinkle, little bat!
How I wonder what you're at!’
You know the song, perhaps?"
“I've heard something like it," said Alice.
“It goes on, you know," the Hatter continued, “in
this way:—
‘ Up above the world you fly,
Like a tea-tray in the sky.
Twinkle, twinkle ——' "
Here the Dormouse shook itself, and began singing in
its sleep, “Twinkle, twinkle, twinkle, twinkle—" and
went on so long that they had to pinch it to make it stop.
“Well, I'd hardly finished the first verse," said the
Hatter, “when the Queen bawled out, ‘He 's murdering
the time! Ofi with his head!' "
“How dreadfully savage!" exclaimed Alice.
“And ever since that," the Hatter went on in a
mournful tone, “he won't do a thing I ask! It's always
six o'clock now."
A bright idea came into Alice's head. “Is that the
reason so many tea things are put out here?" she asked.
“Yes, that's it," said the Hatter with a sigh: “it's
always tea-time, and we've no time to wash the things
between whiles."


68 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“Then you keep moving round, I suppose?" said
Alice. ’
“Exactly so," said the Hatter: “as the things get
used up."
“But when you come to the beginning again?" Alice
ventured to ask.
“Suppose we change the subject," the March Hare
interrupted, yawning. “I'm getting tired of this. I
vote the young lady tells us a story."
“I'm afraid I don't know one," said Alice, rather
alarmed at the proposal.
“Then the Dormouse shall!" they both cried. “Wake
up, Dormouse!" And they pinched it on both sides at
once.
The Dormouse slowly opened its eyes. “I was n't
asleep," it said in a hoarse, feeble voice, “I heard every
word you fellows were saying."
“Tell us a story!" said the March Hare.
“Yes, please do!" pleaded Alice.
“And be quick about it," added the Hatter, “or
you'll be asleep again before it's done."
“Once upon a time there were three little sisters,"
the Dormouse began in a great hurry; “and their names
were Elsie, Lacie, and Tillie; and they lived at the bottom
of a well —"
“What did they live on?" said Alice, who always
took a great interest in questions of eating and drinking.
“They lived on treacle," said the Dormouse, after
thinking a minute or two.
“They could n't have done that, you know," Alice
gently remarked. “They'd have been ill." '
“So they were," said the Dormouse; “very ill."


IN WONDERLAND 69
Alice tried a little to fancy to herself what such an
extraordinary way of living would be like, but it puzzled
her too much: so she went on: “But why did they live
at the bottom of a well?"
“Take some more tea," the March Hare said to Alice,
very earnestly.
“I've had nothing yet," Alice replied in an ofiended
tone: “so I can't take'more."
“You mean you can't take less," said the Hatter:
“it's very easy to take more than nothing."
“Nobody asked your opinion," said Alice.
“Who's making personal remarks now?" the Hatter
asked triumphantly.
Alice did not quite know what to say to this: so she
helped herself to some tea and bread-and-butter, and
then turned to the Dormouse, and repeated her question.
“Why did they live at the bottom of a well?"
The Dormouse again took a minute or two to think
about it, and then said, “It was a treacle-well."
“There 's no such thing!" Alice was beginning very
angrily, but the Hatter and the March Hare went
“Sh! sh!" and the Dormouse sulkily remarked, “If you
can't be civil, you'd better finish the story for yourself."
“No, please go on!" Alice said very humbly. “I
won't interrupt you again. I dare say there may be
one."
“One, indeed!" said the Dormouse indignantly.
However, he consented to go on. “And so these three
little sisters — they were learning to draw, you
know "
“What did they draw?" said Alice, quite forgetting
her promise.


7o ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“Treacle," said the Dormouse, without considering
at all, this time.
“I want a clean cup," interrupted the Hatter: “let's
all move one place on."
He moved on as he spoke, and the Dormouse followed
him: the March Hare moved into the Dorrnouse's place,
and Alice rather unwillingly took the place of the March
Hare. The Hatter was the only one who got any advan-
tage from the change; and Alice was a good deal worse
off than before, as the March Hare had just upset the
milk-jug into his plate.
Alice did not wish to offend the Dormouse again,
so she began very cautiously: “But I don't understand.
Where did they draw the treacle from?"
“You can draw water out of a water-well," said
the Hatter; “so I should think you could draw treacle
out of a treacle-well — eh, stupid?"
“But they were in the well," Alice said to the Dor-
mouse, not choosing to notice this last remark.
“Of course they were," said the Dormouse: “well in."
This answer so confused poor Alice, that she let the
Dormouse go on for some time without interrupting it.
“They were learning to draw," the Dormouse went
on, yawning and rubbing its eyes, for it was getting very
sleepy; “ and they drew all manner of things — everything
that begins with an M "
“Why with an M?" said Alice.
“Why not?" said the March Hare.
Alice was silent.
The Dormouse had closed its eyes by this time,
and was going off into a doze; but, on being pinched
by the Hatter, it woke up again with a little shriek,


IN WONDERLAND 7I
and went on: -—-that begins with an M, such as
mouse-traps, and the moon, and memory, and much-
ness —you know you say things are ‘much of a
muchness'— did you ever see such a thing as a draw-
ing of a muchness?"
“Really, now you ask me,'
confused, “I don't think ——"
“Then you should n't talk," said the Hatter.
This piece of rudeness was more than Alice could
bear: she got up in great disgust, and walked off: the
Dormouse fell asleep instantly, and neither of the others
took the least notice of her going, though she looked back
once or twice, half hoping that they would call after her:
the last time she saw them, they were trying to put
the Dormouse into the teapot.
“At any rate I'll never go there again!" said Alice,
as she picked her way through the wood. “It's the
stupidest tea-party I ever was at in all my life!"
Just as she said this, she noticed that one of the trees
had a door leading right into it. “ That's very curious!"
she thought. “But everything's curious to-day. I
think I may as well go in at once." And in she went.
Once more she found herself in the long hall, and close
to the little glass table. “Now, I'll manage better this
time," she said to herself, and began by taking the little
golden key, and unlocking the door that led into the
garden. Then she set to work nibbling at the mushroom
(she had kept a piece of it in her pocket) till she was
about a foot high: then she walked down the little passage:
and then — she found herself at last in the beautiful
garden, among the bright flower-beds and the cool
fountains.
,
said Alice, very much


CHAPTER VIII
THE QUEEN'S CROQUET GROUND
LARGE rose-tree stood near the entrance of the
garden: the roses growing on it were white, but
there were three gardeners at it, busily painting them
red. Alice thought this a very curious thing, and she
went nearer to watch them, and, just as she came up
to them, she heard one of them say, “Look out now,
Five! Don't go splashing paint over me like that!"
“I couldn't help it," said Five, in a sulky tone.
“Seven jogged my elbow."
On which Seven looked up and said, “That's right,
Five! Always lay the blame on others!"
“ You'd better not talk!" said Five. “I heard the
Queen say only yesterday you deserved to be beheaded."
“What for?" said the one who had spoken first.
“That 's none of your business, Two!" said Seven.
“Yes, it is his business!" said Five. “And I'll tell
him — it was for bringing the cook tulip-roots instead
of onions."
Seven flung down his brush, and had just begun,
“Well, of all the unjust things -—" when his eye chanced
to fall upon Alice, as she stood watching them, and he
checked himself suddenly: the others looked round also,
and all of them bowed low.
“Would you tell me, please," said Alice, a little
timidly, “why you are painting those roses?"
Five and Seven said nothing, but looked at Two.
72


74 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
on their faces, so that they could n't see it?" So she
stood where she was, and waited. _
When the procession came opposite to Alice, they
all stopped and looked at her, and the Queen said,
severely, “Who is this?" She said it to the Knave of
Hearts, who only bowed and smiled in reply.
“Idiot!" said the Queen, tossing her head impa-
'tiently; and, turning to Alice, she went on: “What 's your
name, child?"
“My name is Alice, so please your Majesty," said
Alice very politely; but she added, to herself, “Why,
they're only a pack of cards, after all. I need n't be
afraid of them!"
“And who are these?" said the Queen, pointing to
the three gardeners who were lying round the rose-tree;
for, you see, as they were lying on their faces, and the
pattern on their backs was the same as the rest of the
pack, she could not tell whether they were gardeners,
or soldiers, or courtiers, or three of her own children.
“How should I know?" said Alice, surprised at her
own courage. “It's no business of mine."
The Queen turned crimson with fury, and, after
glaring at her for a moment like a wild beast, began
screaming, “ Off with her head! Ofi —"
“Nonsense!" said Alice, very loudly and decidedly,
and the Queen was silent.
The King laid his hand upon her arm, and timidly
said, “Consider, my dear: she is only a child!"
The Queen turned angrily away from him, and said
to the Knave, “Turn them over!"
' The Knave did so, very carefully, with one foot.
“Get up!" said the Queen in a shrill, loud voice, and


IN WONDERLAND 75
the three gardeners instantly jumped up, ‘and began
bowing to the King, the Queen, the royal children, and
everybody else.
“Leave off that!" screamed the Queen. “You make
me giddy." And then, turning to the‘ rose-tree, she
went on, “What have you been doing here?"
“May it please your Majesty," said Two, in a very
humble tone, going down on one knee as he spoke,
“we were trying —"
“I see!" said the Queen, who had meanwhile been
examining the roses. “Off with their heads!" and the
procession moved on, three of the soldiers remaining
behind to execute the unfortunate gardeners, who ran
to Alice for protection.
“You shan't be beheaded!" said Alice, and she put
them into a large flower-pot that stood near. The three
soldiers wandered about for a minute or two, looking
for them, and then quietly marched off after the others.
“Are their heads off ?" shouted the Queen.
“Their heads are gone, if it please your Majesty!"
the soldiers shouted in reply.
“That 's right!" shouted the Queen. “ Can you play
croquet?"
The soldiers were silent, and looked at Alice, as the
question was evidently meant for her.
“Yes!" shouted Alice.
“Come on, then!" roared the Queen, and Alice joined
the procession, wondering very much what would happen
next.
“It's —it's a very fine day!" said a timid voice at
her side. She was walking by the White Rabbit, who
was peeping anxiously into her face.


76 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“Very," said Alice:—“where's the Duchess?"
“Hush! Hush!" said the Rabbit in a low hurried
tone. He looked anxiously over his shoulder as he
spoke, and then raised himself up on tiptoe, put his
mouth close to her ear, and whispered, “She's under
sentence of execution."
“What for?" said Alice.
“Did you say ‘What a pity'?" the Rabbit asked.
“No, I did n't," said Alice. “I don't think it's at
all a pity. I said ‘What for?' "
“She boxed the Queen's ears —-—" the Rabbit began.
Alice gave a little scream of laughter. “Oh, hush!"
the Rabbit whispered in a frightened tone. “The Queen
will hear you! You see she came rather late, and the
Queen said "
“Get to your places!" shouted the Queen in a voice
of thunder, and people began running about in all direc-
tions, tumbling up against each other: however, they got
settled down in a minute or two, and the game began.
Alice thought she had never seen such a curious
croquet ground in her life: it was all ridges and furrows:
the croquet balls were live hedgehogs, and the mallets
live fiamingoes, and the soldiers had to double themselves
up and stand on their hands and feet, to make the arches.
The chief difficulty Alice found at first was _in manag-
ing her flamingo: she succeeded in getting its body tucked
away, comfortably enough, under her arm, with its legs
hanging down, but generally, just as she had got its neck

nicely straightened out, and was going to give the hedge- .
hog a blow with its head, it would twist itself round
and look up in her face, with such a puzzled expression
that she could not help bursting out laughing; and, when


78 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
the whole head appeared, and then Alice put down her
flamingo, and began an account of the game, feeling very
glad she had some one to listen to her. The Cat seemed
to think that there was enough of it now in sight, and no
more of it appeared.
“I don't think they play at all fairly," Alice began,
in rather a complaining tone, “and they all quarrel so
dreadfully one can't hear oneself speak —and they don't
seem to have any rules in particular: at least, if there
are, nobody attends to them—and you've no idea how
confusing it is all the things being alive: for instance,
there's the arch I've got to go through next walking
about at the other end of the ground—and I should
have croqueted the Queen's hedgehog just now, only it
ran away when it saw mine coming!"
“How do you like the Queen?" said the Cat in a low
voice.
“Not at all," said Alice: “she's so extremely—"
Just then she noticed that the Queen was close behind
her, listening: so she went on “— likely to win, that
it's hardly worth while finishing the game."
The Queen smiled and passed on.
“Who are you talking to?" said the King, coming
up to Alice, and looking at the Cat's head with great
curiosity.
“It 's a friend of mine—a Cheshire-Cat," said Alice:
“allow me to introduce it."
“I don't like the look of it at all," said the King:
“however, it may kiss my hand, if it likes."
“I'd rather not," the Cat remarked. '
“Don't be impertinent," said the King, “and don't
look at me like that!" He got behind Alice as he spoke.


IN WONDERLAND 79
“A cat may look at a king," said Alice. “I've
read that in some book, but I don't remember where."
“Well, it must be removed," said the King very
decidedly; and he called to the Queen, who was passing
at the moment, “My dear! I wish you would have this
cat removed!"
The Queen had only one way of settling all difficulties,
great or small. “Off with his head!" she said without
even looking round.
“I'll fetch the executioner myself," said the King
eagerly, and he hurried ofi.
Alice thought she might as well go back and see how
the game was going on, as she heard the Queen's voice
in the distance, screaming with passion. She had already
heard her sentence three of the players to be executed
for having missed their turns, and she did not like
the look of things at all, as the game was in such
confusion that she never knew whether it was her turn
or not. So she went off in search of her hedgehog.
The hedgehog was engaged in a fight with another
hedgehog, which seemed to Alice an excellent opportunity
for croqueting one of them with the other: the only
difl‘iculty was, that her flamingo was gone across to the
other side of the garden, where Alice could see it trying
in a helpless sort of way to fly up into a tree.
By the time she had caught the flamingo and brought
it back, the fight was over, and both the hedgehogs were
out of sight: “but it does n't matter much," thought
Alice, “as all the arches are gone from this side of the
ground." So she tucked it away under her arm, that it
might not escape again, and went back to have a little
more conversation with her friend.



Page 78
"It may kiss my hand, if t! likes," said the King





CHAPTER IX
THE MOCK TURTLE's STORY
“ 0U can't think how glad I am to see you again,
you dear old thing!" said the Duchess, as she
tucked her arm affectionately into Alice's, and they
walked ofi together.
Alice was very glad to find her in such a pleasant
temper, and thought to-herself that perhaps it was only
the pepper that had made her so savage when they met
in the kitchen.
“When I'm a Duchess," she said to herself (not
in a very hopeful tone, though), “I won't have any
pepper in my kitchen at all. Soup does very well without
-—— Maybe it's always pepper that makes people hot-
tempered," she went on, very much pleased at having
found out a new kind of rule, “and vinegar that makes
them sour—and camomile that makes them bitter —
and —and barley-sugar and such things that make
children sweet-tempered. I only wish people knew
that: then they would n't be so stingy about it, you
know ——-"
She had quite forgotten the Duchess by this time,
and was a little startled when she heard her voice close
to her ear. “You're thinking about something, my
dear, and that makes you forget to talk. I can't tell
you just now what the moral of that is, but I shall
remember it in a bit."
“Perhaps it has n't one," Alice ventured to remark.
6 81


82 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“Tut, tut, child!" said the Duchess. “Everything 's
got a moral, if only you can find it." And she squeezed
herself up closer to Alice's side as she spoke.
Alice did not much like her keeping so close to her:
first, because the Duchess was very ugly; and secondly,
because she was exactly the right height to rest her
chin on Alice's shoulder, and it was an uncomfortably
sharp chin. However, she did not like to be rude: so
she bore it as well as she could.
“The game's going on rather better now," she said,
by way of keeping up the conversation a little.
“ 'T is so," said the Duchess: “and the moral of
that is — ‘Oh, 't is love, 't is love, that makes the world
go round!' "
“Somebody said," Alice whispered, “that it's done
by everybody minding their own business!"
“Ah, well! It means much the same thing," said
the Duchess, digging her sharp little chin into Alice's
shoulder as she added, “and the moral of that is — ‘Take
care of the sense, and the sounds will take care of them-
selves.' "
“How fond she is of finding morals in things!" Alice
thought to herself.
“I dare say you're wondering why I don't put my
arm round your waist," the Duchess said, after a pause:
“the reason is, that I'm doubtful about the temper of
your fiarningo. Shall I try the experiment?"
“He might bite," Alice cautiously replied, not feeling
at all anxious to have the experiment tried.
“Very true," said the Duchess: “flamingoes and
mustard both bite. And the moral of that is —‘ Birds
of a feather flock together.’ "


IN WONDERLAND 83
“Only mustard is n't a bird," Alice remarked.
“Right, as usual," said the Duchess: “what a clear
way you have of putting things!"
“It's a mineral, I think," said Alice.
“Of course, it is," said the Duchess, who seemed
ready to agree to everything that Alice said: “there's
a large mustard-mine near here. And the moral of that
is — ‘The more there is of mine, the less there is of
yours.' "
“ Oh, I know!" exclaimed Alice, who had not attended
to this last remark. “It's a vegetable. It does n't
look like one, but it is."
“I quite agree with you," said the Duchess; “and
the moral of that is — ‘Be what you would seem to be' —
or, if you'd like it put more simply— ‘ Never imagine
yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear
to others that what you were or might have been was
not otherwise than what you had been would have
appeared to them to be otherwise.' "
“I think I should understand that better," Alice
said very politely, “if I had it written down: but I can't
quite follow it as you say it."
“That's nothing to what I could say if I chose," the
Duchess replied, in a pleased tone.
“Pray don't trouble yourself to say it any longer
than that," said Alice.
“Oh, don't talk about trouble!" said the Duchess.
“I make you a present of everything I've said as
yet."
“A cheap sort of present!" thought Alice. “I'm
glad they don't give birthday-presents like that!" But
she did not venture to say it out loud.


84 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“Thinking again?" the Duchess asked, with another
dig of her sharp little chin.
“I've a right to think," said Alice sharply, for she
was beginning to feel a little worried.
“Just about as much right," said the Duchess, “as
pigs have to fly; and the m—-"
But here, to Alice's great surprise, the Duchess's
voice died away, even in the middle of her favorite word
‘moral,' and the arm that was linked into hers began to
tremble. Alice looked up, and there stood the Queen
in front of them, with her arms folded, frowning like a
thunderstorm.
“A fine day, your Majesty!" the Duchess began in a
low, weak voice.
“Now, I give you fair warning," shouted the Queen,
stamping on the ground as she spoke; “either you or
your head must be off, and that in about half no time!
Take your choice!"
The Duchess took her choice, and was gone in a
moment. '
“ Let 's go on with the game," the Queen said to Alice;
and Alice was too much frightened to say a word, but
slowly followed her back to the croquet ground.
The other guests had taken advantage of the Queen's
absence, and were resting in the shade: however, the
moment they saw her, they hurried back to the game,
the Queen merely remarking that a moment's delay would
cost them their lives.
All the time they were playing the Queen never left ofl
quarreling with the other players, and shouting “ Off with
his head!" or “Off with her head!" Those whom she
sentenced were taken into custody by the soldiers, who


86 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“What is the fun?" said Alice.
“Why, she," said the Gryphon. “It 's all her fancy,
that: they never executes nobody, you know. Come on!"
“Everybody says ‘come on!' here," thought Alice,
as she went slowly after it: “ I never was so ordered about
before, in all my life, never!"
They had not gone far before they saw the Mock
Turtle in the distance, sitting sad and lonely on a little
ledge of rock, and, as they came nearer, Alice could hear
him sighing as if his heart would break. She pitied him
deeply. “What is his sorrow?" she asked the Gryphon.
And the Gryphon answered, very nearly in the same’
words as before, “It's all his fancy, that: he has n't
got no sorrow, you know. Come on!"
So they went up to the Mock Turtle, who looked
at them with large eyes full of tears, but said nothing.
“This here young lady," said the Gryphon, “she
wants for to know your history, she do."
“I'll tell it her," said the Mock Turtle in a deep,
hollow tone. “Sit down, both of you, and don't speak
a word till I've finished."
So they sat down, and nobody spoke for some min-
utes. Alice thought to herself, “I don't see how he
can ever finish, if he doesn't begin." But she waited
patiently.
“Once," said the Mock Turtle at last, with a deep
sigh, “I was a real Turtle."
These words were followed by a very long silence,
broken only by an occasional exclamation of “Hjckrrh! "
from the Gryphon, and the constant heavy sobbing of the
Mock Turtle. Alice was very nearly getting up and
saying, “Thank you, sir, for your interesting story,"


IN WONDERLAND 87
but she could not help thinking there must be more to
come, so she sat still and said nothing.
“When we were little," the Mock Turtle went on
at last, more calmly, though still sobbing a little now and
then, “we went to school in the sea. The master was an
old Turtle —we used to call him Tortoise "
“Why did you call him Tortoise, if he was n't one?"
Alice asked.
“We called him Tortoise because he taught us,"
said the Mock Turtle angrily. “Really you are very
dull!"
“You ought to be ashamed of yourself for asking
such a simple question," added the Gryphon; and then
they both sat silent and looked at poor Alice, who felt
ready to sink into the earth. At last the Gryphon said
to the Mock Turtle, “Drive on, old fellow! Don't
be all day about it!" and he went on in these words:-
“Yes, we went to school in the sea, though you
may n't believe it —"
“I never said I did n't!" interrupted Alice.
“You did," said the Mock Turtle.
“Hold your tongue!" added the Gryphon, before
Alice could speak again. The Mock Turtle went on.
“ We had the best of educations—in fact, we went to
school every day "
“I've been to a day-school, too," said Alice; “you
need n't be so proud as all that."
“With extras?" asked the Mock Turtle, a little
anxiously.
“Yes," said Alice: “we learned French and music."
“And washing?" said the Mock Turtle.
“Certainly not!" said Alice indignantly.


88 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“Ah! Then yours was n't a really good school,"
said the Mock Turtle in a tone of great relief. “Now,
at ours, they had, at the end of the bill, ‘French, music,
and washing — extra.' "
“You could n't have wanted it much," said Alice;
“living at the bottom of the sea."
“I could n't afford to learn it," said the Mock Turtle
with a sigh. “I only took the regular course."
“What was that?" inquired Alice.
“Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with,"
the Mock Turtle replied; “and then the different branches
of Arithmetic —Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and
Derision."
“I never heard of ‘Uglification,’ " Alice ventured to
say. “What is it?"
The Gryphon lifted up both its paws in surprise.
“Never heard of uglifying!" it exclaimed. “You know
what to beautify is, I suppose?"
“Yes," said Alice doubtfully: “It means —to —
make — anything — prettier."
“Well, then," the Gryphon went on, “if you don't
know what to uglify is, you are a simpleton."
Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any more
questions about it: so she turned to the Mock Turtle,
and said, “What else had you to learn?"
“Well, there was Mystery," the Mock Turtle replied,
counting off the subjects on his fiappers,—“Mystery,
ancient and modern, with Seaography: then Drawling —
the Drawling-master was an old conger-eel, that used to
come once a week: he taught us Drawling, Stretching,
and Fainting in Coils."
“What was that like?" said Alice.


IN WONDERLAND 89
“Well, I can't show it to you, myself," the Mock
Turtle said: “I'm too stifi. And the Gryphon never
learnt it."
“Had n't time," said the Gryphon: “I went to the
Classical master, though. He was an old crab, he was."
“I never went to him," the Mock Turtle said with a
sigh. “ He taught Laughing and Grief, they used to say."
“So he did, so he did," said the Gryphon, sighing in
his turn; and both creatures hid their faces in their paws.
“And how many hours a day did you do lessons?"
said Alice, in a hurry to change the subject.
“Ten hours the first day," said the Mock Turtle:
“nine the next, and so on."
“What a curious plan!" exclaimed Alice.
“That 's the reason they're called lessons," the
Gryphon remarked: “because they lessen from day to
day."
This was quite a new idea to Alice, and she thought
it over a little before she made her next remark. “Then
the eleventh day must have been a holiday?"
“Of course it was," said the Mock Turtle.
“And how did you manage on the twelfth?" Alice
went on eagerly.
“That's enough about lessons," the Gryphon inter-
rupted in a very decided tone. “Tell her something
about the games now."


CHAPTER X
THE LOBSTER-QUADRILLE
HE Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and drew the back
of one flapper across his eyes. He looked at Alice
and tried to speak, but, for a minute or two, sobs choked
his voice. “Same as if he had a bone in his throat," said
the Gryphon; and it set to work shaking him and punch-
ing him in the back. At last the Mock Turtle recovered
his voice, and, with tears running down his cheeks, he
went on again:—
“You may not have lived much under the sea—"
(“I have n't," said Alice) —“and perhaps you were
never even introduced to a lobster—" (Alice began to
say, “I once tasted " but checked herself hastily,

and said, “No, never") “—— so you can have no idea '
what a delightful thing a Lobster-Quadrille is!"
“ N o, indeed," said Alice. “What sort of a dance is it?"
“Why," said the Gryphon, “you first form into a line
along the sea-shore —"
“Two lines!" cried the Mock Turtle. “Seals, turtles,
salmon, and so on: then, when you've cleared all the
jelly-fish out of the way "
“ That generally takes some time," interrupted the
Gryphon.
“— you advance twice —-
“ Each with a lobster as a partner! " cried the Gryphon.
“Of course," the Mock Turtle said: “advance twice,
set to partners "

,9
9O


IN WONDERLAND 9I
“— change lobsters, and retire in same order,"
continued the Gryphon.
“Then, you know," the Mock Turtle went on,
“you throw the —"
“The lobsters!" shouted the Gryphon, with a bound
into the air. _
“— as far out to sea as you can—
“Swim after them!" screamed the Gryphon.
“Turn a somersault in the sea!" cried the Mock
Turtle, capering wildly about.
“Change lobsters again!" yelled the Gryphon at the
top of its voice.
“Back to land again, and—that's all the first figure,"
said the Mock Turtle, suddenly dropping his voice;
and the two creatures, who had been jumping about
like mad things all this time, sat down again very sadly
and quietly, and looked at Alice.
“It must be a very pretty dance," said Alice
timidly.
“Would you like to see a little of it?" said the Mock
Turtle.
“Very much indeed," said Alice.
“Come, let's try the first figure!" said the Mock
Turtle to the Gryphon. “We can do it without lobsters,
you know. Which shall sing?"
“Oh, you sing," said the Gryphon. “I've forgotten
the words."
So they began solemnly dancing round and round
Alice, every now and then treading on her toes when they
passed too close, and waving their forepaws to mark
the time, while the Mock Turtle sang this, very slowly
and sadly:-
I'


92 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“ Will you walk a little faster?" said a whiting to a snail,
“ There's a porpoise close behind us, and he's treading on
my tail.
See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all advance!
They are waiting on the shingle — will you come and join
the dance?
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join
the dance?
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you
join the dance?
“ You can really have no notion how delightful it will be
When they take us up and throw us, with the lobsters, out
to sea!"
But the snail replied, “ T 00 for, too far!" and gave a look
askance —
Said he thanked the whiting kindly, but he would not join
the dance.
Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not
join the dance.
Would not, could not, would not, could not, could not
join the dance.
“What matters it how far we go?" his scaly friend replied.
“There is another shore, you know, upon the other side.
The farther 017 from England the nearer is to France —
Then turn not pale, beloved snail, but come and join the
dance.
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you. will you join
the dance?
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join
the dance?"
“Thank you, it's a very interesting dance to watch,"
said Alice, feeling very glad that it was over at last:
“and I do so like that curious song about the whiting!"
“Oh, as to the whiting," said the Mock Turtle, “they
— you've seen them, of course?" '


94 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
"Boots and shoes under the sea," the Gryphon went
on in a deep voice, “are done with whiting. Now you
know."
“And what are they made of?" Alice asked in a tone
of great curiosity.
“Soles and eels, of course, the Gryphon replied,
rather impatiently: “Any shrimp could have told you
that."
“ If I 'd been the whiting," said Alice, whose thoughts
were still running on the song, “I 'd have said to the por-
poise, ‘Keep back, please! we don't want you with us!' "
“They were obliged to have him with them," the
Mock Turtle said. “No wise fish would go anywhere
without a porpoise."
“Would n't it, really?" said Alice, in a tone of great
surprise.
“Of course not," said the Mock Turtle. “Why, if
a fish came to me, and told me he was going a journey, I
should say, ‘With what porpoise?' "
“Don't you mean ‘purpose'?" said Alice.
“I mean what I say," the Mock Turtle replied, in an
offended tone. And the Gryphon added, “Come, let 's
hear some of your adventures."
“I could tell you my adventures — beginning from
this morning," said Alice a little timidly; “but it's no
use going back to yesterday, because I was a difierent
person then."
“Explain all that," said the Mock Turtle.
“No, no! The adventures first," said the Gryphon
in an impatient tone: “explanations take such a dreadful
time."
So Alice began telling them her adventures from the
i,


IN WONDERLAND 95
time when she first saw the White Rabbit. She was a
little nervous about it, just at first, the two creatures
got so close to her, one on each side, and opened their
eyes and mouths so very wide; but she gained courage as
she went on. Her listeners were perfectly quiet till she
got to the part about her repeating, “You are old, Father
William," to the Caterpillar, and the words all coming
different, and then the Mock Turtle drew a long breath
and said, “That's very curious!"
“It's all about as curious as it can be," said the
Gryphon.
“It all came different!" the Mock Turtle repeated
thoughtfully. “I should like to hear her try and repeat
something now. Tell her to begin." He looked at the
Gryphon as if he thought it had some kind of authority
over Alice.
“Stand up and repeat ‘ 'T is the voice of the sluggard,' "
said the Gryphon.
“How the creatures order one about, and make one
repeat lessons!" thought Alice. “I might just as well
be at school at once." However, she got up, and began
to repeat it, but her head was so full of the Lobster-
Quadrille, that she hardly knew what she was saying;
and the words came very queer indeed:-
“ 'Tis the voice of the Lobster: I heard him declare
‘You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair.’
As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose
Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes."
“That 's different from what I used to say when I
was a child," said the Gryphon.
“Well, I never heard it before," said the Mock
Turtle; “but it sounds uncommon nonsense."


96 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
Alice said nothmg: she had sat down again with
her face in her hands, wondering if anything would ever
happen in a natural way again.
“I should like to have it explained," said the Mock
Turtle.
“She can't explain it," said the Gryphon hastily.
“Go on with the next verse."
“But about his toes?" the Mock Turtle persisted.
“How could he turn them out with his nose, you know? "
“It 's the first position in dancing," Alice said; but
she was dreadfully puzzled by the whole thing, and
longed to change the subject.
“Go on with the next verse," the Gryphon repeated
impatiently: “it begins ‘I passed by his garden."'
Alice did not dare to disobey, though she felt sure it
would all come wrong, and she went on in a trembling
voice:-
“I passed by his garden, and marked, with one eye,
How the owl and the oyster were sharing a pie:"
“What is the use of repeating all that stuff?" the
Mock Turtle interrupted, “if you don't explain it as
you go on? It's by far the most confusing thing I
ever heard!"
“Yes, I think you'd better leave off," said the Gry-
phon, and Alice was only too glad to do so.
“ Shallwe try another figure of the Lobster-Quadrille? "
the Gryphon went on. “Or would you like the Mock
Turtle to sing you another song?"
“Oh, a song, please, if the Mock Turtle would be
so kind," Alice replied, so eagerly that the Gryphon
said, in a rather offended tone, “Hm! No accounting





IN WONDERLAND 97
for tastes! Sing her ‘Turtle Soup,' will you, old fellow?"
The Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and began, in a
voice sometimes choked with sobs, to sing this:—
“Beautiful Soup, so rich and green,
Waiting in a hot tureen!
Who for such dainties would not stoop?
. Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup!
Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup!
Beau — ootiful Soo —- 00p!
Beau — ootiful Soo —oop!
800—001) of the e —e —evening,
Beautiful, beautiful Soup!
“Beautiful Soup! Who cares for fish,
Game, or any other dish?
Who would not give all else for two p
ennyworth only of beautiful Soup?
Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup?
Beau — oottful Soo — 00p!
Beau — ootiful S00 — oop!
S00 — 00p of the e —e — evening,
Beautiful, beauti —F UL SOUP!"
“Chorus again!" cried the Gryphon, and the Mock
Turtle had just begun to repeat it, when a cry of “The
trial 's beginning!" was heard in the distance.
“Come on!" cried the Gryphon, and, taking Alice
by the hand, it hurried off, without waiting for the end
of the song.
“What trial is it?" Alice panted as she ran; but the
Gryphon only answered, “Come on!" and ran the faster,
while more and more faintly came, carried on the breeze
that followed them, the melancholy words:—
“ S00 — 00p of the e — e — evening,
Beautiful, beautiful Soup!"


CHAPTER XI
WHO STOLE THE TARTs?
HE King and Queen of Hearts were seated on their
throne when they arrived, with a great crowd as-
sembled about them —all sorts of little birds and beasts,
as well as the whole pack of cards: the Knave was stand~
ing before them, in chains, with a soldier on each side to
guard him; and near the King was the White Rabbit,
with a trumpet in one hand, and a scroll of parchment
in the other. In the very middle of the court was a table,
with a large dish of tarts upon it: they looked so good,
that it made Alice quite hungry to look at them —“I
wish they'd get the trial done," she thought, “and hand
round the refreshments!" But there seemed to be no
chance of this; so she began looking at everything about
her to pass away the time.
Alice had never been in a court of justice before, but
she had read about them in books, and she was quite
pleased to find that she knew the name of nearly every-
thing there. “That's the judge," she said to herself,
“because of his great wig."
The judge, by the way, was the King; and, as he
wore his crown over the wig (look at the tailpiece if
you want to see how he did it), he did not look at all
comfortable, and it was certainly not becoming.
“And that's the jury-box," thought Alice; “and those
twelve creatures" (she was obliged to say “creatures,"
you see, because some of them were animals, and some
98


IN WONDERLAND 99
were birds), “I suppose they are the jurors." She said
this last word two or three times over to herself, being
rather proud of it: for she thought, and rightly too,
that very few little girls of her age knew the meaning
of it at all. However, “jurymen" would have done
just as well.
The twelve jurors were all writing very busily on
slates. “What are they doing?" Alice whispered to
the Gryphon. “They can't have anything to put down
yet, before the trial 's begun."
“They're putting down their names," the Gryphon
whispered in reply, “for fear they should forget them
before the end of the trial."
“Stupid things!" Alice began in a loud indignant
voice; but she stopped herself hastily, for the White
Rabbit cried out, “Silence in the court!" and the King
put on his spectacles and looked anxiously round, to
make out who was talking.
Alice could see, as well as if she were looking over
their shoulders, that all the jurors were writing down
“stupid things!" on their slates, and she could even
make out that one of them did n't know how to spell
“ stupid," and that he had to ask his neighbor to tell him.
“A nice muddle their slates 'll be in, before the trial 's
over!" thought Alice.
One of the jurors had a pencil that squeaked. This,
of course, Alice could not stand, and she went round the
court and got behind him, and very soon found an
opportunity of taking it away. She did it so quickly
that the poor little juror (it was Bill, the Lizard) could not
make out at all what had become of it; so, after hunting
all about for it, he was obliged to write with one finger


IN WONDERLAND I0I
“Take off your hat," the King said to the Hatter.
“It is n't mine," said the Hatter.
“Stolen!" the King exclaimed, turning to the jury,
who instantly made a memorandum of the fact.
“I keep them to sell," the Hatter added as an explana-
tion. “I've none of my own. I'm a hatter."
Here the Queen put on her spectacles, and began
staring hard at the Hatter, who turned pale and fidgeted.
“Give your evidence," said the King; “and don't
be nervousI or I'll have you executed on the spot."
This did not seem to encourage the witness at all:
he kept shifting from one foot to the other, looking
uneasily at the Queen, and in his confusion he bit a large
piece out of his teacup instead of the bread-and-butter.
Just at this moment Alice felt a very curious sensation,
which puzzled her a good deal until she made out what
it was: she was beginning to grow larger again, and she
thought at first she would get up and leave the court;
but on second thoughts she decided to remain where she
was as long as there was room for her.
“ I wish you would n't squeeze so," said the Dormouse,
who was sitting next to her. “I can hardly breathe."
“I can't help it," said Alice very meekly: “I'm
growing."
“You've no right to grow here," said the Dormouse.
“Don't talk nonsense," said Alice more boldly:
“you know you're growing too."
“Yes, but I grow at a reasonable pace," said the
Dormouse: “not in that ridiculous fashion." And he
got up very sulkily and crossed over to the other side
of the court.
All this time the Queen had never left ofi’ staring at


IN WONDERLAND I03
“You must remember, ' remarked the King, “or
I'll have you executed."
The miserable Hatter dropped his teacup and bread-
and-butter, and went down on one knee. “I'm a poor
man, your Majesty," be began.
“You're a very poor speaker," said the King.
Here one of the guinea-pigs cheered, and was imme-
diately suppressed by the officers of the court. (As that
is rather a hard word, I will just explain to you how it
was done. They had a large canvas bag, which tied up
at the mouth with strings: into this they slipped the
guinea-pig, head first, and then sat upon it.)
“I'm glad I've seen that done," thought Alice.
“I've so often read in the newspapers, at the end of
trials, ‘There was some attempt at applause, which
was immediately suppressed by the oflicers of the court,'
and I never understood what it meant till now."
“If that 's all you know about it, you may stand
down," continued the King.
“I can't go no lower," said the Hatter: “I'm on the
floor, as it is."
“Then you may sit down," the King replied.
Here the other guinea-pig cheered, and was suppressed.
“ Come, that finishes the guinea-pigs!" thought Alice.
“Now we shall get on better."
“I'd rather finish my tea," said the Hatter, with
an anxious look at the Queen, who was reading the list
of singers.
“You may go," said the King, and the Hatter hur-
riedly left the court, without even waiting to put his
shoes on.
“— and just take his head off outside," the Queen


IN WONDERLAND I05
the list, feeling very curious to see what the next witness
would be like, “— for they have n't got much evidence
yet," she said to herself. Imagine her surprise, when the
White Rabbit read out, at the top of his shrill little voice,
the name “Alice!"


I08 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
“Nearly two miles high," added the Queen.
“Well, I shan't go, at any rate," said Alice: “besides,
that 's not a regular rule: you invented it just now."
“It's the oldest rule in the book," said the King.
“Then it ought to be Number One," said Alice.
The King turned pale, and shut his note-book hastily.
“Consider your verdict," he said to the jury, in a low
trembling voice.
“There's more evidence to come yet, please your
Majesty," said the White Rabbit, jumping up in a great
hurry: “this paper has just been picked up."
“What 's in it?" said the Queen.
“I have n't opened it yet," said the White Rabbit;
“but it seems to be a letter, written by the prisoner to
—to somebody."
“It must have been that," said the King, “unless it
was written to nobody, which is n't usual, you know."
“Who is it directed to?" said one of the jurymen.
“It is n't directed at all, "said the White Rabbit:
“in fact, there's nothing written on the outside."
He unfolded the paper as he spoke, and added,
“It is n't a letter, after all: it's a set of verses."
“Are they in the prisoner's handwriting?" asked
another of the jurymen.
“No, they're not," said the White Rabbit, “and
that's the queerest thing about _it." (The jury all
looked puzzled.)
“He must have imitated somebody else's hand," said
the King. (The jury all brightened up again.)
“Please your Majesty," said the Knave, “I did n't
write it, and they can't prove I did: there 's no name
signed at the end."


IN WONDERLAND I09
“If you didn't sign it," said the King, “that only
makes the matter worse. You must have meant some
mischief, or else you'd have signed your name like an
honest man."
There was a general clapping of hands at this: it was
the first really clever thing the King had said that day.
“That proves his guilt," said the Queen.
“It proves nothing of the sort!" said Alice. “Why,
you don't even know what they're about!"
“Read them, " said the King.
The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. “Where
shall I begin, please your Majesty?" he asked.
“Begin at the beginning," the King said, very
gravely, “and go on till you come to the end: then stop."
These were the verses the White Rabbit read :—
“ They told me you had been to her,
And mentioned me to him:
She gave me a good character,
But said I could not swim.
He sent them word I had not gone
(We know it to be true):
If she should push the matter on,
What would become of you?
I gave her one, they gave him two,
You gave us three or more;
They all returned from him to you,
Though they were mine before.
If I or she should chance to be
Involved in this aflair,
He trusts to you to set them free,
Exactly as we were.


I I0 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
My notion was that you had been
(Before she had this fit)
An obstacle that come between
Him, and ourselves, and it.
Don't let him know she liked them best,
For this must ever be
A secret, kept from all the rest,
Between yourself and me."
“That's the most important piece of evidence we've
heard yet," said the King, rubbing his hands; “so now
let the jury "
“If any one of them can explain it," said Alice (she
had grown so large in the last few minutes that she was n't
a bit afraid of interrupting him), “ I '11 give him sixpence.
I don't believe there 's an atom of meaning in it."
The jury all wrote down, on their slates, “She does n't
believe there's an atom of meaning in it," but none of
them attempted to explain the paper.
“If there's no meaning in it," said the King, “that
saves a world of trouble, you know, as we need n't try to
find any. And yet I don't know," he went on, spreading
out the verses on his knee, and looking at them with one
eye; “I seem to see some meaning in them, after all.
—‘said I could not swim'—you can't swim, can you?"
he added, turning to the Knave.
The Knave shook his head sadly. “Do I look like
it?" he said. (Which he certainly did not, being made
entirely of cardboard.)
“All right, so far," said the King; and he went on
muttering over the verses to himself: “ ‘We know it to be
true'— that's the jury, of course —‘I gave her one, they


IN WONDERLAND I I I
gave him two '— why, that must be what he did with the
tarts, you know ——"
“But it goes on, ‘they all returned from him to you,"'
said Alice.
“Why, there they are!" said the King, triumphantly,
pointing to the tarts on the table. “Nothing can be
clearer than that. Then again —‘before she had this fit'
— you never had fits, my dear, I think?" he said to the
Queen.
“Never!" said the Queen, furiously, throwing an
inkstand at the Lizard as she spoke. (The unfortunate
little Bill had left off writing on his slate with one finger,
as he found it made no mark; but he now hastily began
again, using the ink, that was trickling down his face,
while it lasted.)
“Then the words don't fit you," said the King, looking
round the court with a smile. There was a dead silence.
“It's a pun!" the King added in an angry tone, and
everybody laughed. “Let the jury consider their ver-
dict," the King said, for about the twentieth time that
day.
“ N o, no!" said the Queen. “Sentence first —verdict
afterwards."
“Stuff and nonsense!" said Alice loudly. “The idea
of having the sentence first!"
“Hold your tongue!" said the Queen, turning purple.
“I won't!" said Alice.
“Ofi with her head!" the Queen shouted at the top
of her voice. Nobody moved.
“Who cares for you?" said Alice (she had grown to
her full size by this time). “You're nothing but a
pack of cards!"


I I2 ALICE'S ADVENTURES
At this the whole pack rose up into the air, and came
flying down upon her; she gave a little scream, half of
fright and half of anger, and tried to beat them off, and
found herself lying on the bank, with her head in the lap
of her sister, who was gently brushing away some dead
leaves that had fluttered down from the trees upon
her face.
“Wake up, Alice dear!" said her sister. “Why,
what a long sleep you've had!"
“Oh, I've had such a curious dream!" said Alice.
And she told her sister, as well as she could remember
them, all these strange Adventures of hers that you have
just been reading about; and, when she had finished, her
sister kissed her, and said, “It was a curious dream, dear,
certainly; but now run in to your tea: it's getting late."
So Alice got up and ran off, thinking while she ran, as
well she might, what a wonderful dream it had been.
But her sister sat still just as she left her, leaning her
head on her hand, watching the setting sun, and thinking
of little Alice and all her wonderful Adventures, till she too
began dreaming after a fashion, and this was her dream :—
First, she dreamed about little Alice herself: once
again the tiny hands were clasped upon her knee, and the
bright eager eyes were looking up into hers—she could
hear the very tones of her voice, and see that queer little
toss of her head to keep back the wandering hair that
would always get into her eyes — and still as she listened,
or seemed to listen, the whole place around her became
alive with the strange creatures of her little sister's dream.
The long grass rustled at her feet as the White Rabbit
hurried by—the frightened Mouse splashed his way
through the neighboring pool — she could hear the rattle


IN WONDERLAND I I3
of the teacups as the March Hare and his friends shared
their never-ending meal, and the shrill voice of the Queen
ordering off her unfortunate guests to execution—once
more the pig-baby was sneezing on the Duchess's knee,
while plates and dishes crashed around it — once more the
shriek of the Gryphon, the squeaking of the Lizard's
slate-pencil, and the choking of the suppressed guinea-
pigs, filled the air, mixed up with the distant sob of the
miserable Mock Turtle.
So she sat on, with closed eyes, and half believed
herself in Wonderland, though she knew she had but to
open them again, and all would change to dull reality—
the grass would be only rustling in the wind, and the pool
rippling to the waving of the reeds —the rattling teacups
would change to tinkling sheep-bells, and the Queen's
shrill cries to the voice of the shepherd-boy—and the
sneeze of the baby, the shriek of the Gryphon, and all
the other queer noises, would change (she knew) to the
confused clamor of the busy farm-yard—while the low-
ing of the cattle in the distance would take the place
of the Mock Turtle's heavy sobs.
Lastly, she pictured to herself how this same little
sister of hers would, in the after-time, be herself a grown
woman; and how she would keep, through all her riper
years, the simple and loving heart of her childhood; and
how she would gather about her other little children, and
make their eyes bright and eager with many a strange
tale, perhaps even with the dream of Wonderland of
long ago; and how she would feel with all their simple
'sorrows, and find a pleasure in all their simple joys,
remembering her own child-life, and the happy summer
days.
8


THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE





Child of the pure unclouded brow
And dreaming eyes of wonder!
Though time be fleet, and I and thou
Are half a life asunder,
Thy loving smile will surely hail
The love-gift of a fairy-tale.
I have not seen thy sunny face,
Nor heard thy silver laughter:
No thought of me shall find a place
In thy young life's hereafter —
Enough that now than wilt not fail
To listen to my fairy-tale.
A tale begun in other days,
When summer suns were glowing —
A simple chime, that served to time
The rhythm of our rowing —
Whose echoes live in memory yet,
T hough envious years would say ‘forget.’
Come, hearken then, ere voice of dread,
With bitter tidings laden,
Shall summon to unwelcome bed
A melancholy maiden!
We are but older children, dear,
Who fret to find our bedtime near.


Without, the frost, the blinding snow,
The storm-wind's moody madness —
Within, the firelight's ruddy glow,
And childhood's nest of gladness.
The magic words shall hold thee fast:
Thou shalt not heed the raving blast.
And, though the shadow of a sigh
May tremble through the story,
For ‘happy summer days' gone by,
And vanish'd summer glory —
It shall not touch, with breath of bale,
The pleasance of our fairy-tale.





THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS AND
WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE
CHAPTER I
LOOKING—GLASS HOUSE
NE thing was certain, that the white kitten had had
nothing to do with it—it was the black kitten's
fault entirely. For the white kitten had been having its
face washed by the old cat for the last quarter of an hour
(and bearing it pretty well, considering): so you see that
it could n't have had any hand in the mischief.
The way Dinah washed her children's faces was this:
first she held the poor thing down by its ear with one paw,
and then with the other paw she rubbed its face all over,
the wrong way, beginning at the nose: and just now, as
I said, she was hard at work on the white kitten, which
was lying quite still and trying to purr—no doubt
feeling that it was all meant for its good.
But the black kitten had been finishal with earlier
in the afternoon, and so, while Alice was sitting curled
up in a comer of the great arm-chair, half talking to
herself and half asleep, the kitten had been having a grand
game of romps with the ball of worsted Alice had been
trying to wind up, and had been rolling it up and down
till it had all come undone again; and there it was, spread
over the hearth-rug, all knots and tangles, with the
kitten running after its own tail in the middle.
12!


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I23
mischievous darling! What have you got to say for
yourself? Now don't interrupt me!" she went on, hold-
ing up one finger. “I'm going to tell you all your faults.
Number one: you squeaked twice while Dinah was
washing your face this morning. Now you can't deny
it, Kitty: I heard you! What's that you say?" (pretend-
ing that the kitten was speaking). “Her paw went into
your eye? Well, that's your fault, for keeping your eyes
open—if you'd shut them tight up, it would n't have
happened. Now don't make any more excuses, but
listen! Number two: you pulled Snowdrop away by the
tail just as I had put down the saucer of milk before her!
What, you were thirsty, were you? How do you know
she was n't thirsty too? Now for number three: you
unwound every bit of the worsted while I was n't
looking!
“That's three faults, Kitty, and you've not been
punished for any of them yet. You know I'm saving
up all your punishments for Wednesday week— Suppose
they had saved up all my punishments?" she went on,
talking more to herself than the kitten. “What would
they do at the end of a year? I should be sent to prison,
I suppose, when the day came. Or—let me see-
suppose each punishment was to be going without a
dinner: then, when the miserable day came, I should have
to go without fifty dinners at once! Well, I should n't
mind that much! I'd far rather go without them than
eat them!
“Do you hear the snow against the window-panes,
Kitty? How nice and soft it sounds! Just as if some
one was kissing the window all over outside. I wonder
if the snow loves the trees and fields, that it kisses them


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I25
there 's a dear!" And Alice got the Red Queen off the
table, and set it up before the kitten as a model for it to
imitate: however, the thing did n't succeed, principally,
Alice said, because the kitten would n't fold its arms
properly. So, to punish it, she held it up to the looking-
glass, that it might see how sulky it was, “—and if
you're not good directly,' she added, “I'll put you
through into Looking-glass House. How would you like
that?
“Now, if you'll only attend, Kitty, and not talk so
much, I'll tell you all my ideas about Looking-glass
House. First, there 's the room you can see through the
glass—that's just the same as our drawing-room, only
the things go the other way. I can see all of it when I
get upon a chair— all but the bit just behind the fireplace.
Oh! I do so wish I could see that bit! I want so much to
know whether they've a fire in the winter: you never
can tell, you know, unless our fire smokes, and then smoke
comes up in that room too—but that may be only
pretense, just to make it look as if they had a fire. Well
then, the books are something like our books, only the
words go the wrong way: I know that, because I've held
up one of our books to the glass, and then they hold up
one in the other room.
“How would you like to live in Looking-glass House,
Kitty? I wonder if they'd give you milk in there?
Perhaps Looking-glass milk is n't good to drink — but oh,
Kitty! now we come to the passage. You can just see a
little peep of the passage in Looking-glass House, if you
leave the door of our drawing-room wide open: and it's
very like our passage as far as you can see, only you know
it may be quite different on beyond. Oh, Kitty, how


I26 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
nice it would be if we could only get through into Looking-
glass House! I 'm sure it's got, oh! such beautiful things
in it! Let's pretend there's a way of getting through
into it, somehow, Kitty. Let's pretend the glass has got
all soft like gauze, so that we can get through. Why,
it's turning into a sort of mist now, I declare! It'll be
easy enough to get through—" She was up on the
chimney-piece while she said this, though she hardly
knew how she had got there. And certainly the glass
was beginning to melt away, just like a bright silvery mist.
In another moment Alice was through the glass, and
had jumped lightly down into the Looking-glass room.
The very first thing she did was to look whether there
was a fire in the fireplace, and she was quite pleased to
find that there was a real one, blazing away as brightly
as the one she had left behind. “So I shall be as warm
here as I was in the old room," thought Alice: “warmer,
in fact, because there '11 be no one here to scold me away
from the fire. Oh, what fun it'll be, when they see me
through the glass in here, and can't get at me!"
Then she began looking about, and noticed that what
could be seen from the old room was quite common and
uninteresting, but that all the rest was as different as
possible. For instance, the pictures on the wall next
the fire seemed to be all alive, and the very clock on the
chimney-piece (you know you can only see the back of it
in the Looking-glass) had got the face of a little old man,
and grinned at her. _
“They don't keep this room so tidy as the other,"
Alice thought to herself, as she noticed several of the
chessmen down in the hearth among the cinders; but
in another moment, with a little “Oh!" of surprise, she


ozqo; 9!” {0 pa; auo 1o limp-tum 0340; o u; urnop zos only
IIbq-Jhbmu'\_\‘,_ ‘ ~


‘B’-


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I27
was down on her hands and knees watching them. The
chessmen were walking about, two and two!
“Here are the Red King and the Red Queen," Alice
said (in a whisper, for fear of frightening them), “and
there are the White King and the White Queen sitting
on the edge of the shovel—and here are two Castles
walking arm in arm—I don't think they can hear me,"
she went on, as she put her head closer down, “and I'm
nearly sure they can't see me. I feel somehow as if I
was getting invisible "
Here something began squeaking on the table behind
Alice, and made her turn her head just in time to see one
of the White Pawns roll over and begin kicking: she
watched it with great curiosity to see what would happen
next.
“It is the voice of my child!" the White Queen cried
out, as she rushed past the King, so violently that she
knocked him over among the cinders. “My precious
Lily! My imperial kitten!" and she began scrambling
wildly up the side of the fender.
“Imperial fiddlestick!" said the King, rubbing his
nose, which had been hurt by the fall. He had a right
to be a little annoyed with the Queen, for he was covered
with ashes from head to foot.
Alice was very anxious to be of use, and, as the poor
little Lily was nearly screaming herself into a fit, she
hastily picked up the Queen and set her on the table by
the side of her noisy little daughter.
The Queen gasped and sat down: the rapid journey
through the air had quite taken away her breath, and
for a minute or two she could do nothing but hug the
little Lily in silence. As soon as she had recovered her


I28 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
breath a little, she called out to the White King, who was
sitting sulkily among the ashes, “Mind the volcano!"
“What volcano?" said the King, looking up anxiously
into the fire, as if he thought that was the most likely
place to find one.
“ Blew—me— up," panted the Queen, who was still
a little out of breath. “Mind you come up—the regular
way—don't get blown up!"
Alice watched the White King as he slowly struggled
up from bar to bar, till at last she said, “Why, you'll be
hours and hours getting to the table, at that rate. I'd
far better help you, had n't I?" But the King took no
notice of the question: it was quite clear that he could
neither hear her nor see her.
So Alice picked him up very gently, and lifted him
across more slowly than she had lifted the Queen, that
she might n't take his breath away; but, before she put
him on the table, she thought she might as well dust him
a little, he was so covered with ashes.
She said afterwards that she had never seen in all
her life such a face as the King made, when he found
himself held in the air by an invisible hand, and being
dusted: he was far too much astonished to cry out, but
his eyes and his mouth went on getting larger and
larger, and rounder and rounder, till her hand shook so
with laughing that she nearly let him drop upon the
floor.
“Oh! please don't make such faces, my dear!" she
cried out, quite forgetting that the King could n't hear
her. “ You make me laugh so that I can hardly hold you!
And don't keep your mouth so wide open! All the ashes
will get into it — there, now I think you're tidy enough!"



is nose
It
ing
“1mperialfiddlestick!" said the King, rubb





I3o THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
Knight is sliding down the poker. He balances very badly').
“That's not a memorandum of your feelings!"
There was a book lying near Alice on the table, and
while she sat watching the White King (for she was still
a little anxious about him, and had the ink all ready to
throw over him, in case he fainted again), she turned
over the leaves, to find some part that she could read,
“— for it's all in some language I don't know," she said
to herself.
It was like this.
\DIUOW RSS8. kl.
zscol ‘(Msle S!“ has ,g'sll'rul was 'I'
186cm- 31“ is} sldm'sg bun 3W3 b'sCl
,ZSWQQO‘Nl sslt sisur ‘(zm'sm \llx
.sdmgmo ultras smom N“ bub.
She puzzled over this for some time, but at last a
bright thought struck her. “Why, it 's a Looking-glass
book, of course! And, if I hold it up to a glass, the
words will all go the right way again."
This was the poem that Alice read.
JABBERWOCK Y
'T was brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
“Beware the .Iabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch! "


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I3I
He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought —
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And, as in uflish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiflling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing bdck.
“And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
0 frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"
He chortled in his joy.
'T was brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
“ It seems very pretty," she said when she had finished
it, “but it's rather hard to understand!" (You see she
did n't like to confess, even to herself, that she could n't
make it out at all.) “Somehow it seems to fill my head
with ideas—only I don't exactly know what they are!
However, somebody killed something: that's clear, at any
rate —"
“But oh!" thought Alice, suddenly jumping up,
“if I don't make haste, I shall have to go back through
the Looking-glass, before I've seen what the rest of the


I32 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
house is like! Let 's have a look at the garden first!"
She was out of the room in a moment, and ran down-
stairs—or, at least, it was n't exactly running, but a
new invention for getting downstairs quickly and easily,
as Alice said to herself. She just kept the tips of her
fingers on the hand-rail, and floated gently down without
even touching the stairs with her feet: then she floated
on through the hall, and would have gone straight out
at the door in the same way, if she had n't caught hold
of the door-post. She was getting a little giddy with so
much floating in the air, and was rather glad to find
herself walking again in the natural way.


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I35
“But what could it do, if any danger came?" Alice
asked.
“It could bark," said the Rose.
“It says ‘Bough-wough!"' cried a. Daisy. “That's
why its branches are called boughs!"
“Did n't you know that?" cried another Daisy. And
here they all began shouting together, till the air seemed
quite full of little shrill voices. “Silence, every one of
you!" cried the Tiger-lily, waving itself passionately
from side to side, and trembling with excitement. “They
know I can't get at them!" it panted, bending its quiver-
ing head towards Alice, “or they would n't dare to do it!"
“Never mind!" Alice said in a soothing tone, and,
stooping down to the daisies, who were just begimiing
again, she whispered, “If you don't hold your tongues,
I'll pick you!"
There was silence in a moment, and several of the
pink daisies turned white.
“That 's right!" said the Tiger-lily. “The daisies
are worst of all. When one speaks, they all begin
together, and it's enough to make one wither to hear
the way they go on!"
“How is it you can all talk so nicely?" Alice said,
hoping to get it into a better temper by a compliment.
“I've been in many gardens before, but none of the
flowers could talk."
“Put your hand down, and feel the ground," said the
Tiger-lily. “Then you'll know why."
Alice did so. “It's very hard," she said; “but I
don't see what that has to do with it."
“In most gardens," the Tiger-lily said, “they make
the beds too soft— so that the flowers are always asleep."


I36 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
This sounded a very good reason, and Alice was quite
pleased to know it. “I never thought of that before!"
she said.
“It's my opinion that you never think at all,". the ’
Rose said, in a rather severe tone.
“I never saw anybody that looked stupider," a
Violet said, so suddenly, that Alice quite jumped; for
it had n't spoken before.
“Hold your tongue!" cried the Tiger-lily. “As if
you ever saw anybody! You keep your head under the
leaves, and snore away there, till you know no more
what 's going on in the world than if you were a bud!"
“ Are there any more people in the garden besides me?"
Alice said, not choosing to notice the Rose's last remark.
“There 's one other flower in the garden that can move
about like you," said the Rose. “I wonder how you do
it —" (“You're always wondering," said the Tiger-
lily), “but she's more bushy than you are."
“ Is she like me?" Alice asked eagerly, for the thought
crossed her mind, “There's another little girl in the
garden, somewhere!"
“Well, she has the same awkward shape as you," the
Rose said: “ but she's redder — and her petals are shorter,
I think."
“They're done up close, like a dahlia," said the
Tiger-lily: “not tumbled about, like yours."
“But that's not your fault," the Rose added kindly.
“You're beginning to fade, you know—and then one
can't help one's petals getting a little untidy."
Alice did n't like this idea at all: so, to change the
subject, she asked, “Does she ever come out here?"
“I dare say you'll see her soon," said the Rose.


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I37
“She 's one of the kind that has nine spikes, you know."
“Where does she wear them?" Alice asked with
some curiosity.
“Why, all round her head, of course," the Rose
replied. “I was wondering you had n't got some too.
I thought it was the regular rule."
“She's coming!" cried the Larkspur. “I hear her
footstep, thump, thump, along the gravel-walk!"
Alice looked round eagerly and found that it was the
Red Queen. “She's grown a good deal!" was her first
remark. She had indeed: when Alice first found her in
the ashes, she had been only three inches high—and
here she was, half a head taller than Alice herself!
“It's the fresh air that does it," said the Rose:
“wonderfully fine air it is, out here."
“I think I'll go and meet her," said Alice, for though
the flowers were interesting enough, she felt that it
would be far grander to have a talk with a real Queen.
“You can't possibly do that," said the Rose: “I should
advise you to walk the other way."
This sounded nonsense to Alice, so she said nothing,
but set off at once towards the Red Queen. To her
surprise she lost sight of her in a moment, and found
herself walking in at the front-door again.
A little provoked, she drew back, and, after looking
everywhere for the Queen (whom she spied out at last,
a long way off), she thought she would try the plan, this
time, of walking in the opposite direction.
It succeeded beautifully. She had not been walking
a minute before she found herself face to face with the
Red Queen, and full in sight of the hill she had been so
long aiming at.


I40 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
Alice never could quite make out, in thinking it over
afterwards, how it was that they began: all she remem-
bers is, that they were running hand in hand, and the
Queen went so fast that it was all she could do to keep up
with her: and still the Queen kept crying, “Faster!
Faster!" but Alice felt she could not go faster, though she
had no breath left to say so.
The most curious part of the thing was, that the
trees and the other things round them never changed
their places at all: however fast they went, they never
seemed to pass anything. “I wonder if all the things
move along with us?" thought poor puzzled Alice. And
the Queen seemed to guess her thoughts, for she cried,
“Faster! Don't try to talk!"
Not that Alice had any idea of doing that. She felt
as if she would never be able to talk again, she was get-
ting so much out of breath: and still the Queen cried,
“Faster! Faster!" and dragged her along. “Are we
nearly there?" Alice managed to pant out at last.
“Nearly there!" the Queen repeated. “Why we
passed it ten minutes ago! Faster!" And they ran on
for a time in silence, with the wind whistling in Alice's
ears, and almost blowing her hair off her head, she
fancied.
“Now! Now!" cried the Queen. “Faster! Faster!"
And they went so fast that at last they seemed to skim
through the air, hardly touching the ground with their
feet, till suddenly, just as Alice was getting quite ex-
hausted, they stopped, and she found herself sitting on
the ground, breathless and giddy.
The Queen propped her up against a tree, and said
kindly, “You may rest a little, now."


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 14!
Alice looked round her in great surprise. “Why, I do
believe we've been under this tree the whole time!
Everything 's just as it was!"
“Of course it is," said the Queen. “What would
you have it?"
“Well, in our country,’ said Alice, still panting a
little, “you 'd generally get to somewhere else—if you
ran very fast for a long time as we've been doing."
“A slow sort of country!" said the Queen. “Now,
here, you see, it takes all the running you can do, to keep
in the same place. If you want to get somewhere else,
you must run at least twice as fast as that!"
“I 'd rather not try, please!" said Alice. “I'm quite
content to stay here—only I am so hot and thirsty!"
“I know what you'd like!" the Queen said good-
naturedly, taking a little box out of her pocket. “Have
a biscuit?"
Alice thought it would not be civil to say “No,"
though it was n't at all what she wanted. So she took
it, and ate it as well as she could: and it was very dry:
and she thought she had never been so nearly choked
in all her life.
“While you're refreshing yourself," said the Queen,
“I'll just take the measurements." And she took a
ribbon out of her pocket, marked in inches, and began
measuring the ground, and sticking little pegs in here
and there.
“At the end of two yards," she said, putting in a peg
to mark the distance, “I shall give you your directions—
have another biscuit?"
“No, thank you," said Alice: “one 's quite enough!"
“Thirst quenched, I hope?" said the Queen.
’


:42 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
Alice did not know what to say to this, but luckily
the Queen did not wait for an answer, but went on.
“At the end of three yards I shall repeat them—for fear
of your forgetting them. At the end of four, I shall say
good-by. And at the end of five, I shall go!"
She had got all the pegs put in by this time, and
Alice looked on with great interest as she returned to the
tree, and then began slowly walking down the row.
At the two-yard peg she faced round, and said,
“A pawn goes two squares in its first move, you know.
So you'll go very quickly through the Third Square —-
by railway, I should think—and you'll find yourself in
the Fourth Square in no time. Well, that square belongs
to Tweedledum and Tweedledee—the Fifth is mostly
water—the Sixth belongs to Humpty Dumpty—But
you make no remark?"
“I —I did n't know I had to make one— just then,"
Alice faltered out.
“You should have said," the Queen went on in a tone
of grave reproof, “‘It's extremely kind of you to tell
me all this'—however, we'll suppose it said—the
Seventh Square is all forest — however, one of the Knights
will show you the way—and in the Eighth Square we
shall be Queens together, and it's all feasting and fun!"
Alice got up and curtseyed, and sat down again.
At the next peg the Queen turned again, and this time
she said, “Speak in French when you can't think of the
English for a thing—turn out your toes as you walk-
and remember who you are!" She did not wait for
Alice to curtsey this time, but walked on quickly to
the next peg, where she turned for a moment to say
“Good-by," and then hurried on to the last.


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 143
How it happened, Alice never knew, but exactly as
she came to the last peg, she was gone. Whether she
vanished into the air, or whether she ran quickly into the
wood (“and she can run very fast!" thought Alice),
there was no way of guessing, but she was gone, and
Alice began to remember that she was a Pawn, and
that it would soon be time for her to move.


CHAPTER III
LOOKING—GLASS INSECTS
F COURSE the first thing to do was to make a grand
survey of the country she was going to travel through.
“It's something very like learning geography," thought
Alice, as she stood on tiptoe in hopes of being able to see
a little further. “Principal rivers—there are none.
Principal mountains—I'm on the only one, but I don't
think it's got any name. Principal towns—why, what
are those creatures, making honey down there? They
can't be bees—nobody ever saw bees a mile ofl, you
know —" and for some time she stood silent, watching
one of them that was bustling about among the flowers,
poking its proboscis into them, “just as if it was a regular
bee," thought Alice.
However, this was anything but a regular bee: in
fact, it was an elephant—as Alice soon found out,
though the idea quite took her breath away at first.
“And what enormous flowers they must be!" was her
next idea. “Something like cottages with the roofs
taken off’, and stalks put to them—and what quantities
of honey they must make! I think I'll go down and —-
no, I won't go just yet," she went on, checking herself
just as she was beginning to run down the hill, and trying
to find some excuse for turning shy so suddenly. “It'll
never do to go down among them without a good long
branch to brush them away — and what fun it '11 be when
they ask me how I liked my walk. I shall say, ‘Oh, I
144


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I45
liked it well enough —~' (here came the favorite little toss
of the head), ‘only it was so dusty and hot, and the
elephants did tease so!'
“I think I'll go down the other way," she said
after a pause; “and perhaps I may visit the elephants
later on. Besides, I do so want to get into the Third
Square!"
So, with this excuse, she ran down the hill, and jumped
over the first of the six little brooks.
* t t 8 8
a o o a
i O O i *
“Tickets, please!" said the Guard, putting his head
in at the window. In a moment everybody was holding
out a ticket: they were about the same size as the people,
and quite seemed to fill the carriage.
“Now then! Show your ticket, child!" the Guard
went on, looking angrily at Alice. And a great many
voices all said together (“like the chorus of a song,"
thought Alice), “Don't keep him waiting, child! Why,
his time is worth a thousand pounds a minute!"
“I'm afraid I haven't got one," Alice said in a
frightened tone: “there was n't a ticket-office where I
came from." And again the chorus of voices went on.
“There was n't room for one where she came from. The
land there is worth a thousand pounds an inch!"
“ Don't make excuses," said the Guard: “you should
have bought one from the engine-driver." And once
more the chorus of voices went on with, “The man that
drives the engine. Why, the smoke alone is worth a
thousand pounds a puff!"
Alice thought to herself, “Then there's no use in
10


I46 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
speaking." The voices did n't join in, this time, as she
had n't spoken, but, to her great surprise, they all thought
in chorus (I hope you understand what thinking in cho-
rus means—for I must confess that I don't), “Better
say nothing at all. Language is worth a thousand
pounds a word!"
“I shall dream about a thousand pounds to-night,
I know I shall!" thought Alice.
All this time the Guard was looking at her, first
through a telescope, then through a microscope, and
then through an opera-glass. At last he said, “You're
traveling the wrong way," and shut up the window, and
went away.
“So young a child," said the gentleman sitting
opposite to her (he was dressed in white paper), “ought
to know which way she's going, even if she does n't know
her own name!"
A Goat, that was sitting next to the gentleman in
white, shut his eyes and said in a loud voice, “She
ought to know her way to the ticket-office, even if she
does n't know her alphabet!"
There was a Beetle sitting next the Goat (it was a
very queer carriage-full of passengers altogether), and,
as the rule seemed to be that they should all speak in
turn, he went on with, “She'll have to go back from here
as luggage!"
Alice could n't see who was sitting beyond the Beetle,
but a hoarse voice spoke next. “Change engines " it
said, and there it choked and was obliged to leave off.
“It sounds like a horse," Alice thought to herself.
And an extremely small voice, close to her ear, said, "You
might make a joke on that—something about ‘horse' and ‘hoarse,’ you know."


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I47
Then a very gentle voice in the distance said, “She
must be labeled ‘Lass, with care,' you know —"
And after that other voices went on (“What a
number of people there are in the carriage!" thought
Alice), saying, “She must go by post, as she's got a head
on her ———" “She must be sent as a message by the
telegraph —" “She must draw the train herself the
rest of the way —-," and so on.
But the gentleman dressed in white paper leaned
forwards and whispered in her ear, “Never mind what
they all say, my dear, but take a return-ticket every
time the train stops."
“Indeed, I shan't!" Alice said rather impatiently.
“I don't belong to this railway journey at all —I was
in a wood just now—and I wish I could get back there!"
"You might make 9 591.9 on am." said the little voice close to
her ear: "something about ‘you would it you could,' you know."
“Don't tease so," said Alice, looking about in vain
to see where the voice came from. “If you're so anxious
to have a joke made, why don't you make one yourself?"
The little voice sighed deeply. It was very unhappy,
evidently, and Alice would have said something pitying
to comfort it, “if it would only sigh like other people!"
she thought. But this was such a wonderfully small
sigh, that she would n't have heard it at all, if it had n't
come quite close to her ear. The consequence of this was
that it tickled her ear very much, and quite took off her
thoughts from the unhappiness of the poor little creature.
~r know m m 9 friend," the little voice went on: --. dear friend,
and an old friend. And you won't hurt me, though I an an insect."
“What kind of insect?" _Alice inquired, a little
anxiously. What she really Wanted to know was,


I 48 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
whether it could sting or not, but she thought this
would n't be quite a civil question to ask.
"What. then you don't-—" the little voice began, when it
was drowned by a shrill scream from the engine, and
everybody jumped up in alarm, Alice among the rest.
The Horse, who had put his head out of the window,
quietly drew it in and said, “It's only a brook we have
to jump over." Everybody seemed satisfied with this,
though Alice felt a little nervous at the idea of trains
jumping at all. “However, it'll take us into the Fourth
Square, that's some comfort!" she said to herself. In
another moment she felt the carriage rise straight up
into the air, and in her fright she caught at the thing
nearest to her hand, which happened to be the Goat's
beard.
a e o a o
O i ll Q
1|! ‘l O * *
But the beard seemed to melt away as she touched
it, and she found herself sitting quietly under a tree —-
while the Gnat (for that was the insect she had been
talking to) was balancing itself on a twig just over her
head, and fanning her with its wings.
It certainly was a very large Gnat: “about the size of
a chicken," Alice thought. Still, she could n't feel nerv-
ous with it, after they had been talking together so long.
“— then you don't like all insects?" the Gnat went
on, as quietly as if nothing had happened.
“I like them when they can talk," Alice said. “None
of them ever talk, where I come from."
“What sort of insects do you rejoice in, where you
come from?" the Gnat inquired.


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I49
“I don't rejoice in insects at all," Alice explained,
“because I'm rather afraid of them—at least the large
kinds. But I can tell you the names of some of
them."
“Of course they answer to their names?" the Gnat
remarked carelessly.
“I never knew them to do it."
“What 's the use of their having names," the Gnat
said, “if they won't answer to them?"
“No use to them," said Alice; “but it's useful to the
people that name them, I suppose. If not, why do things
have names at all?"
“I can't say," the Gnat replied. “Further on, in
the wood down there, they've got no names—however,
go on with your list of insects: you're wasting time."
“Well, there's the Horse-fly," Alice began, counting
off the names on her fingers.
“All right," said the Gnat. “Halfway up that bush,
you'll see a Rocking-horse-fiy, if you look. It's made
entirely of wood, and gets about by swinging itself from
branch to branch."
“What does it live on?" Alice asked, with great
curiosity.
“ Sap and sawdust," said the Gnat. “ Go on with the
list."
Alice looked at the Rocking-horse-fly with great
interest, and made up her mind that it must have been
just repainted, it looked so bright and sticky; and then
she went on.
“And there's the Dragon-fly."
“Look on the branch above your head," said the
Gnat, “and there you'll find a Snap-dragon-fly. Its


I50 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
body is made of plum-pudding, its wings of holly-leaves,
and its head is a raisin burning in brandy."
“And what does it live on?" Alice asked, as before.
“Frumenty and mince-pie," the Gnat replied; “and
it makes its nest in a Christmas-box."
“And then there's the Butterfly," Alice went on,
after she had taken a. good look at the insect with its
head on fire, and had thought to herself, “I wonder if
that's the reason insects are so fond of flying into candles
—because they want to turn into Snap-dragon-flies!"
“Crawling at your feet," said the Gnat (Alice drew
her feet back in some alarm), “you may observe a
Bread-and-butter-fiy. Its wings are thin slices of bread-
and-butter, its body is a crust, and its head is a lump of
sugar."
“And what does it live on?"
“Weak tea with cream in it."
A new difliculty came into Alice's head. “Sup-
posing it could n't find any?" she suggested.
“Then it would die, of course." '
“But that must happen very often," Alice remarked
thoughtfully.
“It always happens," said the Gnat.
After this, Alice was silent for a minute or two,
pondering. The Gnat amused itself meanwhile by
humming round and round her head: at last it settled
again and remarked, “I suppose you don't want to
lose your name?"
“N o, indeed," Alice said, a little anxiously.
“And yet I don't know," the Gnat went on in a
careless tone: “only think how convenient it would be if
you could manage to go home without it! For instance,


152 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
herself, “where things have no names. I wonder what '11
become of my name when I go in? I should n't like to
lose it at all—because they 'd have to give me another,
and it would be almost certain to be an ugly one. But
then the fun would be, trying to find the creature that
had got my old name! That's just like the advertise-
ments, you know, when people lose dogs —‘answers to
the name of “Dash": had on a brass collar' —just fancy
calling everything you met ‘Alice,' till one of them
answered! Only they would n't answer at all, if they
were wise."
She was rambling on in this way when she reached
the wood: it looked very cool and shady. “Well, at
any rate it's a great comfort," she said as she stepped
under the trees, “after being so hot, to get into the —
into the—into what?" she went on, rather surprised at
not being able to think of the word. “I mean to get
under the— under the —under this, you know! " putting
her hand on the trunk of the tree. “What does it call
itself, I wonder? I do believe it 's got no name—why
to be sure it has n't!"
She stood silent for a minute, thinking: then she
suddenly began again. “Then it really has happened,
after all! And now, who am I? I will remember, if I
can! I 'm determined to do it!" But being determined
did n't help her much, and all she could say, after a great
deal of puzzling, was “L, I know it begins with L!"
Just then a Fawn came wandering by: it looked at
Alice with its large gentle eyes, but did n't seem at all
frightened. “Here then! Here then!" Alice said, as
she held out her hand and tried to stroke it; but it only
started back a little, and then stood looking at her again.


CHAPTER IV
TWEEDLEDUM AND TWEEDLEDEE
HEY were standing under a tree, each with
an arm round the other's neck, and Alice knew
which was which in a moment, because one of them
had “DUM" embroidered on his collar, and the
other “DEE." “I suppose they've each got ‘TW'EE-
DLE' round at the back of the collar," she said to
herself. -
They stood so still that she quite forgot they were
alive, and she was just going round to see if the word
“TWEEDLE" was written at the back of each collar,
when she was startled by a voice coming from the one
marked “DUM."
“If you think we're wax-works," he said, ‘you
ought to pay, you know. Wax-Works weren't made
to be looked at for nothing. Nohow!"
“Contrariwise," added the one marked “DEE," “if
you think we're alive, you ought to speak."
“I'm sure I'm very sorry," was all Alice could say;
for the words of the old song kept ringing through her
head like the ticking of a clock, and she could hardly help
saying them out loud :—
“ Tweedledum and Tweedledee
Agreed to have a battle;
For Tweedledum said T weedledee
Had spoiled his nice new rattle.
I55


I 56 THROUGH THE LOOKI N G—GLASS
Just then flew down a monstrous crow,
As black as a tar-barrel;
Which frightened both the heroes so,
They quite forgot their quarrel."
“I know what you're thinking about," said Tweedle-
dum; “but it is n't so, nohow."
“Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, “if it was
so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it
is n't, it ain't. That 's logic."
“I was thinking," Alice said very politely, “which
is the best way out of this wood: it's getting so dark.
Would you tell me, please?"
But the fat little men only looked at each other and
grinned.
They looked so exactly like a couple of great school—
boys, that Alice could n't help pointing her finger at
Tweedledum, and saying, “First Boy!"
“Nohow!" Tweedledum cried out briskly, and shut
his mouth up again with a snap.
“Next Boy!" said Alice, passing on to Tweedledee,
though she felt quite certain he would only shout out
“Contrariwise!" and so he did.
“You've begun wrong!" cried Tweedledum. “The
first thing in a visit is to say ‘How d'ye do?' and shake
hands!" And here the two brothers gave each other a
hug, and then they held out the two hands that were
free, to shake hands with her.
Alice did not like shaking hands with either of them
first, for fear of hurting the other one's feelings; so, as
the best way out of the difficulty, she took hold of both
hands at once: the next moment they were dancing round
in a ring. This seemed quite natural (she remembered


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I57
afterwards), and she was not even surprised to hear music
playing: it seemed to come from the tree under which
they were dancing, and it was done (as well as she could
make it out) by the branches rubbing one across the other,
like fiddles and fiddle-sticks.
“But it certainly was funny" (Alice said afterwards,
when she was telling her sister the history of all this),
“to find myself singing ‘Here we go round the mulberry
bush.' I don't know when I began it, but somehow I felt
as if I'd been singing it a long long time!"
The other two dancers were fat, and very soon out
of breath. “Four times round is enough for one dance,"
Tweedledum panted out, and they left off dancing as
suddenly as they had begun: the music stopped at the
same moment.
Then they let go of Alice's hands, and stood looking
at her for a minute: there was a rather awkward pause,
as Alice did n't know how to begin a conversation with
people she had just been dancing with. “It would
never do to say ‘How d 'ye do?' now," she said to herself:
“we seem to have got beyond that, somehow!"
“ I hope you're not much tired?" she said at last.
“Nohow. And thank you very much for asking,"
said Tweedledum.
“So much obliged!" added Tweedledee. “You like
poetry?"
“Ye-es, pretty well — some poetry," Alice said doubt-
fully. “Would you tell me which road leads out of the
wood?"
“What shall I repeat to her?" said Tweedledee,
looking round at Tweedledum with great solemn eyes,
and not noticing Alice's question.


I58 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“‘The Walrus and the Carpenter' is the longest,"
Tweedledum replied, giving his brother an affectionate hug.
Tweedledee began instantly:
“The sun was shining
Here Alice ventured to interrupt him. “If it 's very
long," she said, as politely as she could, “would you
please tell me first which road "
Tweedledee smiled gently, and began again:
1,
“ The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright —-
And this was odd, because it was
The middle of the night.
“ The moon was shining sulkily,
Because she thought the sun
Had got no business to be there
After the day was done —
‘It 's very rude of him,' she said,
‘To come and spoil the fun! '
“The sea was wet as wet could be,
The sands were dry as dry.
You could not see a cloud because
No cloud was in the sky:
No birds were flying overhead —
There were no birds to fly.
“The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand:
They wept like anything to see
Such quantities of sand:
‘If this were only cleared away,'
They said, ‘it would be grand!'


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I59
If seven maids with seven mops
Swept it for half a year,
Do you suppose,' the Walrus said,
‘That they could get it clear?'
‘I doubt it,' said the Carpenter,
And shed a bitter tear.
‘“O Oysters, come and walk with us!'
The Walrus did beseech.
‘A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk,
Along the briny beach:
We cannot do with more than four,
To give a hand to each.'
“ The eldest Oyster looked at him,
But never a word he said:
The eldest Oyster winked his eye,
And shook his heavy head —
Meaning to say he did not choose
To leave the oyster-bed.
“But four young Oysters hurried up,
All eager for the treat:
Their coats were brushed, their faces washed,
Their shoes were clean and neat —-
And this was odd, because, you know,
They had n't any feet.
“ Four other Oysters followed them,
And yet another four;
And thick and fast they came at last,
And more, and more, and more —
All hopping through the frothy waves,
And scrambling to the shore.
“ The Walrus and the Carpenter
Walked on a mile or so,


I60
THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
And then they rested on a rock
Conveniently low:
And all the little Oysters stood
And waited in a row.
‘“T he time has come,' the Walrus said,
‘T o talk of many things:
Of shoes — and ships — and sealing-wax-
Of cabbages — and kings —
And why the sea is boiling hot —
And whether pigs have wings.'
‘“But wait a bit,' the Oysters cried,
‘Before we have our chat;
For some of us are out of breath,
And all of us are fat!'
‘N0 hurry!' said the Carpenter.
They thanked him much for that.
“ ‘A loaf of bread,' the Walrus said,
‘Is what we chiefly need:
Pepper and vinegar besides
Are very good indeed —
Now, if you're ready, Oysters dear,
We can begin to feed.'
“‘But not on us! ' the Oysters cried,
Turning a little blue.
‘After such kindness that would be
A dismal thing to do!'
‘The night is fine,' the Walrus said
‘Do you admire the view?
“‘It was so kind of you to come!
And you are very nice!'
The Carpenter said nothing but
‘Cut us another slice.



And all the little Oysters stood
And waited in a row





AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I6I
I wish you were not quite so deaf —-
I 've had to ask you twice!'
“‘It seems a shame,’ the Walrus said,
‘To play them such a trick.
After we've brought them out so far,
And made them trot so quick!'
The Carpenter said nothing but
‘The butter's spread too thick!’
“'I weep for you,' the Walrus said:
‘I deeply sympathize.'
With sobs and tears he sorted out
Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.
‘“0 Oysters,' said the Carpenter,
‘You've had a pleasant run!
Shall we be trotting home again?'
But answer come there none —
And this was scarcely odd, because
They'd eaten every one."
“I like the Walrus best," said Alice: "because he
was a little sorry for the poor oysters."
“He ate more then the Carpenter, though," said
Tweedledee. “You see he held his handkerchief in front,
so that the Carpenter could n't count how many he took:
contrariwise."
“That was mean!" Alice said indignantly. “Then
I like the Carpenter best—if he did n't eat so many as
the Walrus."
“But he ate as many as he could get," said Tweedle-
dum.
11


I62 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
This was a puzzler. After a pause, Alice began,
“ Well! They were both very unpleasant characters "
Here she checked herself in some alarm, at hearing
something that sounded to her like the puffing of a large
steam-engine in the wood near them, though she feared
it was more likely to be a wild beast. “Are there any
lions or tigers about here?" she asked timidly.
“It's only the Red King snoring," said Tweedledee.
“Come and look at him!" the brothers cried, and
they each took one of Alice's hands, and led her up to
where the King was sleeping.
“Is n't he a lovely sight?" said Tweedledum.
Alice could n't say honestly that he was. He had
a tall red night-cap on, with a tassel, and he was lying
crumpled up into a sort of untidy heap, and snoring
loud —“fit to snore his head ofi!" as Tweedledum
remarked.
“I'm afraid he'll catch cold with lying on the damp
grass," said Alice, who was a very thoughtful little
girl.
“He's dreaming now,' said Tweedledee: “and what
do you think he's dreaming about?"
Alice said “Nobody can guess that."
“Why, about you!" Tweedledee exclaimed, clapping
his hands triumphantly. “And if he left off dreaming
about you, where do you suppose you 'd be?"
“Where I am now, of course," said Alice.
“Not you!" T weedledee retorted contemptuously.
“You 'd be nowhere. Why, you're only a sort of thing
in his dream!"
“If that there King was to wake," added Tweedle-
dum, “you'd go out—bang!—just like a candle!"


I64 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“Selfish things!" thought Alice, and she was just
going to say “ Good-night" and leave them, when Tweedle-
dum sprang out from under the umbrella, and seized
her by the wrist.
“Do you see that?" he said, in a voice choking with
passion, and his eyes grew large and yellow all in a
moment, as he pointed with a trembling finger at a
small white thing lying under the tree.
“It's only a rattle," Alice said, after a careful exam-
ination of the little white thing. “Not a rattle-snake,
you know," she added hastily, thinking that he was
frightened: “ only an old rattle—quite old and broken."
“I knew it was!" cried Tweedledum, beginning to
stamp about wildly and tear his hair. “It 's spoilt, of
course!" Here he looked at Tweedledee, who imme-
diately sat down on the ground, and tried to hide himself
under the umbrella.
Alice laid her hand upon his arm, and said, in a sooth-
ing tone, “You need n't be so angry about an old rattle."
“But it is n't old!" Tweedledum cried, in a greater
fury than ever. “It's new, I tell you—I bought it
yesterday—my nice NEW RATTLE!" and his voice
rose to a perfect scream.
All this time Tweedledee was trying his best to fold
up the umbrella, with himself in it: which was such an
extraordinary thing to do, that it quite took off Alice's
attention from the angry brother. But he could n't
quite succeed, and it ended in his rolling over, bundled
up in the umbrella, with only his head out: and there
he lay, opening and shutting his mouth and his large
eyes —“looking more like a fish than anything else,"
Alice thought.


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I65
“ Of course you agree to have a battle?" Tweedledum
said in a calmer tone.
“I suppose so," the other sulkily replied, as he
crawled out of the umbrella: “only she must help us
to dress up, you know."
So the two brothers went off hand in hand into the
wood, and returned in a minute with their arms full of
things—such as bolsters, blankets, hearth-rugs, table-
cloths, dish-covers, and coal-scuttles. “I hope you're
a good hand at pinning and tying strings?" Tweedledum
remarked. “Every one of these things has got to go on,
somehow or other."
Alice said afterwards she had never seen such a fuss
made about anything in all her life—the way those two
bustled about—and the quantity of things they put
on—and the trouble they gave her in tying strings
and fastening buttons—“Really, they'll be more like
bundles of old clothes than anything else, by the time
they're ready!" she said to herself, as she arranged a
bolster round the neck of Tweedledee, “to keep his head
from being cut off," as he said.
“You know," he added very gravely, “it's one of the
most serious things that can possibly happen to one in
a battle—to get one's head cut off."
Alice laughed loud: but she managed to turn it
into a cough, for fear of hurting his feelings.
“Do I look very pale?" said Tweedledum coming
up to have his helmet tied on. (He called it a helmet,
though it certainly looked much more like a saucepan.)
“Well—yes—a little," Alice replied gently.
_ “I 'm very brave, generally," he went on in a low voice:
“only to-day I happen to have a headache."


I66 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“And I've got a toothache!" said Tweedledee, who
had overheard the remark. “I'm far worse than
you!"
“Then you'd better not fight to-day," said Alice,
thinking it a good opportunity to make peace.
“We must have a bit of a fight, but I don't care about
going on long," said Tweedledum. “What 's the time
now?"
Tweedledee looked at his watch, and said, “Half-
past four."
“Let's fight till six, and then have dinner," said
Tweedledum.
“Very well," the other said, rather sadly: “and she
can watch us—only you'd better not come very close,"
he added: “I generally hit everything I can see—when
I get really excited."
“And I hit everything within reach," cried Tweedle-
dum, “whether I can see it or not!"
Alice laughed. “You must hit the trees pretty
often, I should think," she said.
Tweedledum looked round him with a satisfied
smile. “I don't suppose," he said, “there'll be a tree
left standing, for ever so far round, by the time we've
finished!"
“And all about a rattle!" said Alice, still hoping to
make them a little ashamed of fighting for such a trifle.
“I should n't have minded it so much," said 'hweedle-
dum, “if it had n't been a new one."
“I wish the monstrous crow would come!" thought
Alice.
“There's only one sword, you know," Tweedledum
said to his brother: “but you can have the umbrella—-


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I67
it's quite as sharp. Only we must begin quick. It's
getting as dark as it can."
“And darker," said Tweedledee.
It was getting dark so suddenly that Alice thought
there must be a thunderstorm coming on. “What a
thick black cloud that is!" she said. “And how fast it
comes! Why, I do believe it 's got wings!"
“It's the crow!" Tweedledum cried out in a shrill
voice of alarm; and the two brothers took to their heels
and were out of sight in a moment.
Alice ran a little way into the wood, and stopped
under a large tree. “It can never get at me here,"
she thought: “it's far too large to squeeze itself in
among the trees. But I wish it would n't flap its wings
so—it makes quite a hurricane in the wood—here's
somebody's shawl being blown away!"


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I7I
“Yes, but then I had done the things I was punished
for," said Alice: “that makes all the difference."
“But if you had n't done them," the Queen said,
“that would have been better still; better, and better,
and better!" Her voice went higher with each “ better,"
till it got quite to a squeak at last.
Alice was just beginning to say, “There's a mistake
somewhere ——," when the Queen began screaming, so
loud that she had to leave the sentence unfinished. “Oh,
oh, oh!" shouted the Queen, shaking her hand about
as if she wanted to shake it off. “My finger's bleeding!
'Oh, oh, oh, oh!"
Her screams were so exactly like the whistle of a
steam-engine, that Alice had to hold both her hands over
her ears.
“What is the matter?" she said, as soon as there
was a chance of making herself heard. “Have you
pricked your finger?"
“I have n't pricked it yet," the Queen said, “but I
soon shall—oh, oh, oh!"
“When do you expect to do it?" Alice asked, feeling
very much inclined to laugh.
“When I fasten my shawl again," the poor Queen
groaned out: “the brooch will come undone directly.
Oh, oh!" As she said the words the brooch flew open,
and the Queen clutched wildly at it, and tried to clasp
it again.
“Take care!" cried Alice. “You're holding it all
crooked!" And she caught at the brooch; but it was too
late: the pin had slipped, and the Queen had pricked her
finger.
“That accounts for the bleeding, you see," she said


I72 THROUGH THE LOOKI NG—-GLASS
to Alice with a smile. “Now you understand the way
things happen here."
“But why don't you scream now?" Alice asked,
holding her hands ready to put over her ears again.
“Why, I've done all the screaming already," said the
Queen. “What would be the good of having it all over
again?"
By this time it was getting light. “The crow must
have flown away, I think," said Alice: “ I 'm so glad it's
gone. I thought it was the night coming on."
“I wish I could manage to be glad!" the Queen said.
“Only I never can remember the rule. You must be
very happy, living in this wood, and being glad whenever
you like!"
“Only it is so very lonely here!" Alice said in a
melancholy voice; and, at the thought of her loneliness,
two large tears came rolling down her cheeks.
“Oh, don't go on like that!" cried the poor Queen,
wringing her hands in despair. “Consider what a great
girl you are. Consider what a long way you've come
to-day. Consider what o'clock it is. Consider anything,
only don't cry!"
Alice could not help laughing at this, even in the
midst of her tears. “ Can you keep from crying by
considering things?" she asked.
“That's the way it's done," the Queen said with
great decision: “nobody can do two things at once, you
know. Let's consider your age to begin with—how old
are you?"
“I'm seven and a half, exactly."
“ You need n't say ‘exactually,' " the Queen remarked.
“I can believe it without that. Now I'll give you


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I73
something to believe. I'm just one hundred and one,
five months and a day."
“I can't believe that!" said Alice.
“Can't you?" the Queen said in a pitying tone.
“Try again: draw a long breath, and shut your eyes."
Alice laughed. “There's no use trying," she said:
“one can't believe impossible things."
“I dare say you have n't had much practice," said
the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it
for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed
as many as six impossible things before breakfast.
There goes the shawl again!"
The brooch had come undone as she spoke, and a
sudden gust of wind blew the Queen's shawl across a
little brook. The Queen spread out her arms again,
and went flying after it, and this time she succeeded in
catching it for herself. “I've got it!" she cried in a
triumphant tone. “ N ow you shall see me pin it on again,
all by myself!" _
“Then I hope your finger is better now?" Alice said
very politely, as she crossed the little brook after the
Queen.
# Q i * t
a: * a: t
* * II C i
“ Oh, much better!" cried the Queen, her voice rising
into a squeak as she went on. “Much be-etter! Be-etter!
Be-e-e-etter! Be-e-ehh!" The last word ended in a
long bleat, so like a sheep that Alice quite started.
She looked at the Queen, who seemed to have suddenly
wrapped herself up in wool. Alice rubbed her eyes,
and looked again. She could n't make out what had


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I75
struck her. “I 'll follow it up to the very top shelf of all.
It'll puzzle it to go through the ceiling, I expect!"
But even this plan failed: the ‘thing' went through the
ceiling as quietly as possible, as if it were quite used to it.
“Are you a child or a teetotum? " the Sheep said, as
she took up another pair of needles. “You'll make
me giddy soon, if you go on turning round like that."
She was now working with fourteen pairs at once, and
Alice could n't help looking at her in great astonishment.
“How can she knit with so many?" the puzzled child
thought to herself. “She gets more and more like a
porcupine every minute!"
“Can you row?" the Sheep asked, handing her a
pair of knitting-needles as she spoke.
“Yes, a little—but not on land—and not with
needles —" Alice was beginning to say, when suddenly
the needles turned into oars in her hands, and she found
they were in a little boat, gliding along between banks:
so there was nothing for it but to do her best.
“Feather!" cried the Sheep, as she took up another
pair of needles.
This did n't sound like a remark that needed any
answer: so Alice said nothing, but pulled away. There
was something very queer about the water, she thought,
as every now and then the oars got fast in it, and would
hardly come out again.
“Feather! Feather!" the Sheep cried again, taking
more needles. “You'll be catching a crab directly."
“A dear little crab!" thought Alice. “I should
like tha ."
“Did n't you hear me say ‘Feather'?" the Sheep
cried angrily, taking up quite a bunch of needles.


I76 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“Indeed I did," said Alice: “you've said it very
often—and very loud. Please where are the crabs?"
“In the water, of course!" said the Sheep, sticking
some of the needles into her hair, as her hands were full.
“Feather, I say!"
“Why do you say ‘Feather' so often?" Alice asked
at last, rather vexed. “I'm not a bird!"
“You are," said the Sheep: “you're a little goose."
This offended Alice a little, so there was no more
conversation for a minute or two, while the boat glided
gently on, sometimes among beds of weeds (which made
the oars stick fast in the water, worse than ever), and
sometimes under trees, but always with the same tall
river-banks frowning over their heads.
“Oh, please! There are some scented rushes!"
Alice cried in a sudden transport of delight. “There
really are—and such beauties!"
“You need n't say ‘please' to me about 'em," the
Sheep said, without looking up from her knitting: “I
did n't put 'em there, and I'm not going to take 'em
away."
“No, but I meant—please, may we wait and pick
some?" Alice pleaded. “If you don't mind stopping
the boat for a minute."
“How am I to stop it?" said the Sheep. “If you
leave off rowing, it'll stop of itself."
So the boat was left to drift down the stream as it
would, till it glided gently in among the waving rushes.
And then the little sleeves were carefully rolled up, and
the little arms were plunged in elbow-deep, to get hold
of the rushes a good long way down before breaking
them ofl—and for a while Alice forgot all about the Sheep


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I77
and the knitting, as she bent over the side of the boat,
with just the ends of her tangled hair dipping into the
water—while with bright eager eyes she caught at one
bunch after another of the darling scented rushes.
“I only hope the boat won't tipple over!" she said
to herself. “Oh, what a lovely one! Only I could n't
quite reach it." And it certainly did seem a little
provoking (“almost as if it happened on purpose,"
she thought) that, though she managed to pick plenty
of beautiful rushes as the boat glided by, there was
always a more lovely one that she could n't reach.
“The prettiest are always further!" she said at last,
with a sigh at the obstinacy of the rushes in growing
so far off, as, with flushed cheeks and dripping hair and
hands, she scrambled back into her place, and began to
arrange her new-found treasures.
What mattered it to her just then that the rushes
had begun to fade, and to lose all their scent and beauty,
from the very moment that she picked them? Even
real scented rushes, you know, last only a very little
While — and these, being dream-rushes, melted away
almost like snow, as they lay in heaps at her feet — but
Alice hardly noticed this, there were so many other
curious things to think about.
They had n't gone much farther before the blade of
one of the oars got fast in the water and would n't
come out again (so Alice explained it afterwards), and
the consequence was that the handle of it caught her
under the chin, and, in spite of a series of little shrieks
of ‘Oh, oh, oh!' from poor Alice, it swept her straight
off the seat, and down among the heap of rushes.
However, she wasn't a bit hurt, and was soon up
12


I78 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
again: the Sheep went on with her knitting all the while,
just as if nothing had happened. “That was a nice
crab you caught!" she remarked, as Alice got back into
her place, very much relieved to find herself still in the
boat.
“Was it? I did n't see it," said Alice, peeping
cautiously over the side of the boat into the dark water.
“I wish it had n't let go — I should so like a little crab
to take home with me!" But the Sheep only laughed
scornfully, and went on with her knitting.
“Are there many crabs here?" said Alice.
“Crabs, and all sorts of things," said the Sheep:
“plenty of choice, only make up your mind. Now,
what do you want to buy?"
“To buy!" Alice echoed in a tone that was half
astonished and half frightened—for the oars, and the
boat, and the river, had vanished all in a moment, and
she was back again in the little dark shop.
“I should like to buy an egg, please," she said timidly.
“How do you sell them?"
“Fivepence farthing for one— two pence for two,"
the Sheep replied.
“Then two are cheaper than one?" Alice said in a
surprised tone, taking out her purse.
“Only you must eat them both, if you buy two,"
said the Sheep.
“Then I'll have one, please," said Alice, as she put
the money down on the counter. For she thought to
herself, “They might n't be at all nice, you know."
The Sheep took the money, and put it away in a
box: then she said, “I never put things into people's
hands—that would never do— you must get it for


CHAPTER VI
HUMPTY DUMPTY
OWEVER the egg only got larger and larger, and
more and more human: when she had come within
a few yards of it, she saw that it had eyes and a nose and
mouth; and, when she had come close to it, she saw clearly
that it was HUMPTY DUMPTY himself. “It can't
be anybody else!" she said to herself. “I'm as certain
of it, as if his name were written all over his face!"
It might have been written a hundred times, easily,
on that enormous face. Humpty Dumpty was sitting,
with his legs crossed like a Turk, on the top of a high
wall — such a narrow one that Alice quite wondered
how he could keep his balance — and, as his eyes were
steadily fixed in the opposite direction, and he did n't
take the least notice of her, she thought he must be a
stufied figure, after all.
“And how exactly like an egg he is!" she said aloud,
standing with her hands ready to catch him, for she was
every moment expecting him to fall.
“It's very provoking," Humpty Dumpty said after
a long silence, looking away from Alice as he spoke,
“to be called an egg —very!"
“I said you looked like an egg, sir," Alice gently ex-
plained. “And some eggs are very pretty, you know," she
added, hoping to turn her remark into a sort of compliment.
“Some people," said Humpty Dumpty, looking away
from her as usual, “have no more sense than a baby!"
180


I 82 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
for the queer creature. “That wall is so very narrow!"
“What tremendously easy riddles you ask!" Humpty
Dumpty growled out. “Of course I don't think so!
Why, if ever I did fall off — which there's no chance of
—but if I did " Here he pursed up his lips, and
looked so solemn and grand that Alice could hardly
help laughing. “If I did fall," he went on, “the King
has promised me — ah, you may turn pale, if you like!
You did n't think I was going to say that, did you?
The King has promised me — with his very own mouth —
to — to —"
“To send all his horses and all his men," Alice
interrupted, rather unwisely.
“Now I declare that's too bad!" Humpty Dumpty
cried, breaking into a sudden passion. “You 've been
listening at doors — and behind trees —and down
chimneys — or you could n't have known it!"
“I haven't, indeed!" Alice said very gently. “It's
in a book."
“Ah, well! They may write such things in a book,"
Humpty Dumpty said in a calmer tone. “That's what
you call a History of England, that is. Now, take a
good look at me! I'm one that has spoken to a King,
I am: mayhap you'll never see such another: and, to
show you I'm not proud, you may shake hands with
me!" And he grinned almost from ear to ear, as he
leant forwards (and as nearly as possible fell off the wall
in doing so) and offered Alice his hand. She watched
him a little anxiously as she took it. “If he smiled
much more the ends of his mouth might meet behind,"
she thought: “and then I don't know what would happen
to his head! I 'm afraid it would come off!"


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I83
“Yes, all his horses and all his men," Humpty
Dumpty went on. “They'd pick me up again in a
minute, they would! However, this conversation is
going on a little too fast: let's go back to the last remark
but one."
“I'm afraid I can't quite remember it," Alice said,
very politely.
“In that case we start afresh," said Humpty
Dumpty, “and it's my turn to choose a subject —"
(“He talks about it just as if it was a game!" thought
Alice.) “So here's a question for you. How old did
you say you were?"
Alice made a short calculation, and said, “Seven
years and six months."
“Wrong!" Humpty Dumpty exclaimed trium-
phantly. ' “You never said a word like it!"
“I thought you meant ‘How old are you?’ " Alice
explained.
“If I'd meant that, I'd have said it," said Humpty
Dumpty.
Alice did n't want to begin another argument so she
said nothing.
“Seven years and six months!" Humpty Dumpty
repeated thoughtfully. “An uncomfortable sort of age.
Now if you'd asked my advice, I'd have said, ‘Leave
off at seven' —but it's too late now."
“I never ask advice about growing," Alice said
indignantly.
“Too proud?" the other inquired.
Alice felt even more indignant at this suggestion.
“I mean," she said, “that one can't help growing older."
“One can't, perhaps," said Humpty Dumpty; “but





I86 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“Certainly," said Alice.
“And only one for birthday presents, you know.
There's glory for you!"
“ I don't know what you mean by ‘glory,' " Alice said.
Humpty Dumpty smiled contemptuously. “Of
course you don't —till I tell you. I meant ‘there's
a nice knock-down argument for you!' "
“But ‘glory' does n't mean ‘a nice knock-down
argument,' " Alice objected.
“When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said, in
rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it
to mean—neither more nor less."
“The question is," said Alice, “whether you can
make words mean so many different things."
“The question is," said Humpty Dumpty, “which
is to be master—that's all."
Alice was too much puzzled to say anything; so after
a minute Humpty Dumpty began again. “They've a
temper, some of them—particularly verbs: they're
the proudest—adjectives you can do anything with,
but not verbs—however, I can manage the whole lot
of them! Impenetrability! That 's what I say!"
“Would you tell me, please," said Alice, “what that
means?"
“ Now you talk like a reasonable child," said Humpty
Dumpty, looking very much pleased. “I meant by
‘impenetrability' that we've had enough of that subject,
and it would be just as well if you'd mention what you
mean to do next, as I suppose you don't mean to stop
here all the rest of your life."
“That's a great deal to make one word mean," Alice
said in a thoughtful tone.


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I87
“When I make a word do a lot of work like that,"
said Humpty Dumpty, “I always pay it extra."
“Oh!" said Alice. She was too much puzzled to
make any other remark.
“Ah, you should see 'em come round me of a Saturday
night," Humpty Dumpty went on, wagging his head
gravely from side to side, “for to get their wages, you
know."
(Alice didn't venture to ask what he paid them with;
and so you see I can't tell you.)
“You seem very clever at explaining words, sir,"
said Alice. “Would you kindly tell me the meaning of
the poem called ‘Jabberwocky'?"
“Let's hear it," said Humpty Dumpty. “I can
explain all the poems that ever were invented—and a
good many that haven't been invented just yet."
This sounded very hopeful, so Alice repeated the first
verse :—
“'T was brillig, and the slithy loves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe."
“That's enough to begin with," Humpty Dumpty
interrupted: “there are plenty of hard words there.
‘Brillig' means four o'clock in the afternoon—the time
when you begin broiling things for dinner."
“That'll do very well," said Alice: “and ‘slithy'?"
“Well, ‘slithy' means ‘lithe and slimy.' ‘Lithe' is
the same as ‘active.' You see it's like a portmanteau —
there are two meanings packed up into one word."
“I see it now," Alice remarked thoughtfully: “and
what are ‘toves'?"


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I89
“I read it in a book," said Alice. “But I had some
poetry repeated to me much easier than that, by —
Tweedledee, I think it was."
“As to poetry, you know," said Humpty Dumpty,
stretching out one of his great hands, “I can repeat
poetry as well as other folk, if it comes to that —"
“Oh, it need n't come to that!" Alice hastily said,
hoping to keep him from beginning.
“The piece I 'm going to repeat," he went on without
noticing her remark, “was written entirely for your
amusernen ."
Alice felt that in that case she really ought to listen
to it; so she sat down, and said “Thank you" rather
sadly.
“In winter, when the fields are white,
I sing this song for your delight —-
only I don't sing it," he added, as an explanation.
“I see you don't," said Alice.
“If you can see whether I'm singing or not, you've
sharper eyes than most," Humpty Dumpty remarked
severely. Alice was silent.
“In spring, when woods are getting green,
I'll try and tell you what I mean":
“Thank you very much," said Alice.
“In summer, when the days are long,
Perhaps you'll understand the song:
"In autumn, when the leaves are brown,
Take pen and ink, and write it down."


190 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“I will, if I can remember it so long," said Alice.
“You need n't go on making remarks like that,"
Humpty Dumpty said: “they're not sensible, and they
put me out."
“I sent a message to the fish:
I told them ‘This is what I wish.’
“ The little fishes of the sea,
They sent an answer back to me.
“ The little fishes' answer was
‘We cannot do it, sir, because
i"
“I'm afraid I don't quite understand,‘ said Alice.
“It gets easier further on,” Humpty Dumpty replied.
“I sent to them again to say
‘It will be better to obey.'
“ The fishes answered, with a grin,
‘Why, what a temper you are in!'
“I told them once, I told them twice:
They would not listen to advice.
“I took a kettle large and new,
Fit for the deed I had to do.
“My heart went hop, my heart went thump:
I filled the kettle at the pump.
“ Then some one came to me and said
‘The little fishes are in bed.'
“I said to him, I said it plain,
‘Then you must wake them up again.'


I92 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“The face is what one goes by, generally," Alice
remarked in a thoughtful tone.’
“That's just what I complain of," said Humpty
Dumpty. “Your face is the same as everybody has —-
the two eyes, so —" (marking their places in the air
with his thumb) “nose in the middle, mouth under.
It's always the same. Now if you had the two eyes on
the same side of the nose, for instance—or the mouth
at the top—that would be some help."
“It wouldn't look nice," Alice objected. But
Humpty Dumpty only shut his eyes, and said, “Wait
till you've tried."
Alice waited a minute to see if he would speak again,
but, as he never opened his eyes or took any further
notice of her, she said “Good-by!" once more, and,
getting no answer to this, she quietly walked away:
but she could n't help saying to herself, as she went,
“Of all the unsatisfactory —" (she repeated this
aloud, as it was a great comfort to have such a long
word to say) “of all the unsatisfactory people I ever met
———" She never finished the sentence, for at this mo-
ment a heavy crash shook the forest from end to end.


[94 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
of them are wanted in the game. And I have n't sent
the two Messengers, either. They're both gone to the
town. Just look along the road, and tell me if you can
see either of them."
“I see nobody on the road," said Alice.
“I only wish I had such eyes," the King remarked
in a fretful tone. “To be able to see Nobody! And at
that distance too! Why, it's as much as I can do to see
real people, by this light!"
All this was lost on Alice, who was still looking
intently along the road, shading her eyes with one hand.
“I see somebody now!" she exclaimed at last. “But
he's coming very slowly—and what curious attitudes
he goes into!" (For the Messenger kept skipping up
and down, and wriggling like an eel, as he came along,
with his great hands spread out like fans on each side.)
“Not at all," said the King. “He's an Anglo-
Saxon Messenger—and those are Anglo-Saxon attitudes.
He only does them when he's happy. His name is
Haigha." (He pronounced it so as to rhyme with
‘mayor.')
“I love my love with an H," Alice could n't help
beginning, “because he is Happy. I hate him with an
H, because he is Hideous. I fed him with—with —
with Ham-sandwiches and Hay. His name is Haigha,
and he lives ———"
“He lives on the Hill," the King remarked simply,
without the least idea that he was joining in the game,
while Alice was still hesitating for the name of a town
beginning with H. “The other Messenger's called
Hatta. I must have two, you know-to come and go.
One to come, and one to go."


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I95
“I beg your pardon?" said Alice.
“It is n't respectable to beg," said the King.
“I only meant that I did n't understand," said Alice.
“Why one to come and one to go?"
“Don't I tell you?" the King repeated impatiently.
“I must have two—to fetch and carry. One to fetch,
and one to carry."
At this moment the Messenger arrived: he was far
too much out of breath to say a Word, and could only
wave his hands about, and make the most fearful faces
at the poor King.
“This young lady loves you with an H," the King
said, introducing Alice in the hope of turning ofi the
Messenger's attention from himself—but it was of no
use—the Anglo-Saxon attitudes only got more extraor-
dinary every moment, while the great eyes rolled wildly
from side to side.
“You alarm me!" said the King. “I feel faint —
Give me a ham sandwich!"
On which the Messenger, to Alice's great amusement,
opened a bag that hung round his neck, and handed a
sandwich to the King, who devoured it greedily.
“Another sandwich!" said the King.
“There's nothing but hay left now," the Messenger
said, peeping into the bag.
“Hay, then," the King murmured in a faint whisper.
Alice was glad to see that it revived him a good deal.
"There 's nothing like eating hay when you're faint,"
he remarked to her, as he munched away.
“I should think throwing cold water over you would
be better," Alice suggested: “-- or some sal-volatile."
“I did n't say there was nothing better," the King


I96 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
replied. “I said there was nothing like it." Which
Alice did not venture to deny.
“Who did you pass on the road?" the King went
on, holding out his hand to the Messenger for some
more hay.
“Nobody," said the Messenger.
“Quite right," said the King: “this young lady saw
him too. So of course Nobody walks slower than
you."
“I do my best," the Messenger said in a sullen tone.
“I'm sure nobody walks much faster than I do!"
“He can't do that," said the King, “or else he 'd have
been here first. However, now you've got your breath,
you may tell us what's happened in the town."
“I'll whisper it," said the Messenger, putting his
hands to his mouth in the shape of a trumpet and stooping
so as to get close to the King's ear. Alice was sorry for
this, as she wanted to hear the news too. However,
instead of whispering, he simply shouted, at the top of
his voice, “They're at it again!"
“Do you call that a whisper?" cried the poor King,
jumping up and shaking himself. “If you do such a
thing again, I'll have you buttered! It went through
and through my head like an earthquake!"
“It would have to be a very tiny earthquake!"
thought Alice. “Who are at it again?" she ventured
to ask.
“Why, the Lion and the Unicorn, of course," said
the King.
“Fighting for the crown?"
“Yes, to be sure," said the King: “and the best of
the joke is, that it's my crown all the while! Let's


I98 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
dear child?" he went on, putting his arm aflectionately
round Hatta's neck. '
Hatta looked round and nodded, and went on with his
bread-and-butter.
“Were you happy in prison, dear child?" said Haigha.
Hatta looked round once more, and this time a tear
or two trickled down his cheek; but not a word would
he say.
“Speak, can't you!" Haigha cried impatiently. But
Hatta only munched away, and drank some more tea.
“Speak, won't you!" cried the King. “How are
they getting on with the fight?"
Hatta made a desperate effort, and swallowed a
large piece of bread-and-butter. “They're getting on
very well," he said in a choking voice: “each of them
has been down about eighty-seven times."
“Then I suppose they'll soon bring the white bread
and the brown?" Alice ventured to remark.
“It's waiting for 'em now," said Hatta; “this is a
bit of it as I'm eating." '
There was a pause in the fight just then, and the Lion
and the Unicorn sat down, panting, while the King
called out, “Ten minutes allowed for refreshments!"
Haigha and Hatta set to work at once, carrying round
trays of white and brown bread. Alice took a piece to
taste, but it was very dry.
“I don't think they'll fight any more to-day," the
King said to Hatta: “ go and order the drums to begin."
And Hatta went bounding away like a grasshopper.
For a minute or two Alice stood silent, watching him.
Suddenly she brightened up. “Look, look!" she cried,
pointing eagerly. “There 's the White Queen running


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE I99
across the country! She came flying out of the wood
over yonder —How fast those Queens can run!"
“ There's some enemy after her, no doubt," the King
said, without even looking round. “That wood 's full
of them."
“But are n't you going to run and help her?" Alice
asked, very much surprised at his taking it so quietly.
“No use, no use!" said the King. “She runs so
fearfully quick. You might as well try to catch a Bander-
snatch! But I'll make a memorandum about her, if
you like—She's a dear good creature," he repeated
softly to himself, as he opened his memorandum-book.
“Do you spell ‘creature' with a double ‘e'?"
At this moment the Unicorn sauntered by them,
with his hands in his pockets. “I had the best of it this
time?" he said to the King, just glancing at him as he
passed.
“A little—a little," the King replied, rather
nervously. “You should n't have run him through with
your horn, you know."
“It did n't hurt him," the Unicorn said carelessly,
and he was going on, when his eye happened to fall upon
Alice: he turned round instantly and stood for some
time looking at her with an air of the deepest disgust.
“What—is—this?" he said at last.
“This is a child!" Haigha replied eagerly, coming in
front of Alice to introduce her, and spreading out both his
hands towards her in an Anglo-Saxon attitude. “We
only found it to-day. It's as large as life, and twice
as natural!"
“I always thought they were fabulous monsters!"
said the Unicorn. “Is it alive?"


20o THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“It can talk," said Haigha solemnly.
The Unicorn looked dreamily at Alice, and said,
“Talk; child."
Alice could not help her lips curling up into a smile as
she began: “ Do you know, I always thought Unicorns were
fabulous monsters, too? I never saw one alive before."
“Well, now that we have seen each other," said the
Unicorn, “if you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you.
Is that a bargain?"
“Yes, if you like," said Alice.
“Come, fetch out the plum-cake, old man!" the
Unicorn went on, turning from her to the King. “None
of your brown bread for me!"
“Certainly—certainly!" the King muttered, and
beckoned to Haigha. “Open the bag!" he whispered.
“Quick! Not that one—that's full of hay!" '
Haigha took a large cake out of the bag, and gave
it to Alice to hold, while he got out a dish and carving-
knife. How they all came out of it Alice could n't guess.
It was just like a conjuring-trick, she thought.
The Lion had joined them while this was going on:
he looked very tired and sleepy, and his eyes were half
shut. “What's this!" he said, blinking lazily at Alice,
and speaking in a deep hollow tone that sounded like the
tolling of a great bell.
“Ah, what is it, now?" the Unicorn cried eagerly.
“You'll never guess! I could n't."
The Lion looked at Alice wearily. “Are you animal
— or vegetable —or mineral?" he said, yawning at
every other word.
“It's a fabulous monster!" the Unicorn cried out,
before Alice could reply.



Page zoI
Alice had seated herself on the bank of a little brook, and was sawing
away with the knife


202 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
cakes," the Unicorn remarked. “Hand it round first,
and cut it afterwards."
This sounded nonsense, but Alice very obediently got
up, and carried the dish round, and the cake divided
itself into three pieces as she did so. “Now cut it up,"
said the Lion, as she returned to her place with the empty
dish.
“I say, this isn't fair cried the Unicorn, as Alice
sat with the knife in her hand, very much puzzled how
to begin. “The Monster has given the Lion twice as
much as me!"
“She's kept none for herself, anyhow," said the Lion.
“Do you like plum-cake, Monster?"
But before Alice could answer him, the drums began.
Where the noise came from, she could n't make out:
the air seemed full of it, and it rang through and through
her head till she felt quite deafened. She started to her
feet and sprang across the little brook in her terror,
* t O i Q
o * it *
* :11 t 1‘ t
I,
!
and had just time to see the Lion and the Unicorn rise
to their feet, with angry looks at being interrupted in
their feast, before she dropped to her knees, and put her
hands over her ears, vainly trying to shut out the dreadful
uproar.
“If that does n't ‘drum them out of town,"' she
thought to herself, “nothing ever will!"


2I2 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“Well, not the next day," the Knight repeated as
before: “not the next day. In fact," he went on, holding
his head down, and his voice getting lower and lower,
“I don't believe that pudding ever was cooked! In
fact, I don't believe that pudding ever will be cooked!
And yet it was a very clever pudding to invent."
“What did you mean it to be made of?" Alice asked,
hoping to cheer him up, for the poor Knight seemed
quite low-spirited about it.
“It began with blotting-paper," the Knight answered
with a groan.
“That would n't be very nice, I'm afraid "
“Not very nice alone," he interrupted, quite eagerly:
“but you've no idea what a difference it makes, mixing
it with other things — such as gunpowder and sealing
wax. And here I must leave you." They had just
come to the end of the wood.
Alice could only look puzzled: she was thinking of
the pudding.
' “You are sad," the Knight said in an anxious tone:
“let me sing you a song to comfort you."
“Is it very long?" Alice asked, for she had heard a
good deal of poetry that day.
“It's long," said the Knight, “but it's very, very
beautiful. Everybody that hears me sing it —either
it brings the tears into their eyes, or else —-"
“Or else what?" said Alice, for the Knight had made
a sudden pause.
“Or else it does n't, you know. The name of the
song is called ‘Haddocks' Eyes.’ "
“Oh, that's the name of the song, is it?" Alice said,
trying to feel interested.


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE
2I5
Yet twopence-halfpenny is all
They give me for my toil.'
“But I was thinking of a way
To feed oneself on batter,
And so go on from day to day
Getting a little fatter.
I shook him well from side to side,
Until his face was blue:
‘Come, tell me how you live,' I cried,
‘And what it is you do!'
“He said, ‘I hunt for haddocks' eyes
Among the heather bright,
And work them into waistcoat-buttons
In the silent night.
And these I do not sell for gold
Or coin of silvery shine,
But for a copper halfpenny,
And that will purchase nine.
“ ‘I sometimes dig for buttered rolls,
Or set limed twigs for crabs:
I sometimes search the grassy knolls
For wheels of Hansom-cabs.
And that's the way' (he gave a wink)
‘By which I get my wealth —
And very gladly will I drink
Your Honor's noble health.'
“I heard him then, for I had just
Completed my design
To keep the Menai bridge from rust
By boiling it in wine.
I thanked him much for telling me
The way he got his wealth,
But chiefly for his wish that he
Might drink my noble health.


216 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“And now, if e'er by chance I put
My fingers into glue,
Or madly squeeze a right-hand foot
Into a left-hand shoe,
Or if I drop upon my toe
A very heavy weight,
I weep, for it reminds me so
Of that old man I used to know—
Whose look was mild, whose speech was slow,
Whose hair was whiter than the snow,
Whose face was very like a crow,
With eyes, like cinders, all aglow,
Who seemed distracted with his woe,
Who rocked his body to and fro,
And muttered mumblingly and low,
As if his mouth were full of dough,
Who snorted like a buflalo —
That summer evening long ago,
A-sitting on a gate."
As the Knight sang the last words of the ballad, he
gathered up the reins, and turned his horse's head along
the road by which they had come. “You've only a few
yards to go," he said, “down the hill and over that little
brook, and then you'll be a Queen But you'll stay
and see me off first?" he added as Alice turned with an
eager look in the direction to which he pointed. “I shan't
be long. You'll wait and wave your handkerchief when
I get to that turn in the road! I think it'll encourage
me, you see."
“Of course I'll wait," said Alice: “and thank you
very much for coming so far — and for the song— I
liked it very much."
“I hope so," the Knight said doubtfully: “but you
did n't cry so much as I thought you would."


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 2I7
So they shook hands, and then the Knight rode
slowly away into the forest. “It won't take long to see
him 017', I expect," Alice said to herself, as she stood
watching him. “There he goes! Right on his head
as usual! However, he gets on again pretty easily —
that comes of having so many things hung round the
horse " So she went on talking to herself, as she
watched the horse walking leisurely along the road,
and the Knight tumbling off, first on one side and then
on the other. After the fourth or fifth tumble he reached
the turn, and then she waved her handkerchief to him,
and waited till he was out of sight.
“I hope it encouraged him," she said, as she turned
to run down the hill: “and now for the last brook, and
to be a Queen! How grand it sounds!" A very few
steps brought her to the edge of the brook. “The
Eighth Square at last!" she cried as she bounded across,
t O O O t
O i i i
O i O O i

and threw herself down to rest on a lawn as soft as moss,
with little flower-beds dotted about it here and there.
“Oh, how glad I am to get here! And what is this on
my head?" she exclaimed in a tone of dismay, as she put
her hands up to something very heavy, that fitted tight
all round her head.
“But how can it have got there without my knowing
it?" she said to herself, as she lifted it ofi, and set it on
her lap to make out what it could possibly be.
It was a golden crown.


CHAPTER IX
QUEEN ALICE
ELL, this is grand!" said Alice. “ I never expected
I should be a Queen so soon — and I'll tell you
what it is, your Majesty," she went on, in a severe tone
(she was always rather fond of scolding herself), “it'll
never do for you to be lolling about on the grass like that!
Queens have to be dignified, you know!"
So she got up and walked about — rather stifliy just
at first, as she was afraid that the crown might come off:
but she comforted herself with the thought that there
was nobody to see her, “and if I really am a Queen,"
she said as she sat down again, “ I shall be able to manage
it quite well in time."
Everything was happening so oddly that she did n't
feel a bit surprised at finding the Red Queen and the
White Queen sitting close to her, one on each side: she
would have liked very much to ask them how they came
there, but she feared it would not be quite civil. How-
ever, there would be no harm, she thought, in asking
if the game was over. “Please, would you tell me —"
she began, looking timidly at the Red Queen.
“Speak when you're spoken to!" the Queen sharply
interrupted her.
“But if everybody obeyed that rule," said Alice,
who was always ready for a little argument, “and if
you only spoke when you were spoken to, and the other
person always waited for you to begin, you see nobody
would ever say anything, so that "
218



Page 218
“Queens have to be dignified, you know!"





AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 2I9
“ Ridiculous! " cried the Queen. “Why, don't you see,
child —" here she broke off with a frown, and, after
thinking for a minute, suddenly changed the subject
of the conversation. “What do you mean by ‘If you
really are a Queen'? What right have you to call your-
self so? You can't be a Queen, you know, till you've
passed the proper examination. And the sooner we
begin it, the better."
“I only said ‘ if ' ! " poor Alice pleaded in a piteous tone.
The two Queens looked at each other, and the Red
Queen remarked, with a little shudder, “She says she
only said ‘if'——"
“But she said a great deal more than that!" the
White Queen moaned, wringing her hands. '“Oh, ever
so much more than that!"
“So you did, you know," the Red Queen said to
Alice. “Always speak the truth — think before you
speak — and write it down afterwards."
“I'm sure I did n't mean —" Alice was beginning,
but the Red Queen interrupted her impatiently.
‘ “That's just what I complain of! You should have
meant! What do you suppose is the use of a child
without any meaning? Even a joke should have some
meaning — and a child's more important than a joke,
I hope. You could n't deny that, even if you tried with
both hands."
“I don't deny things with my hands," Alice objected.
“Nobody said you did," said the Red Queen. “I
said you could n't if you tried."
“She's in that state of mind," said the White Queen,
“that she wants to deny something —only she does n't
know what to deny!"


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 22I
Alice considered. “The bone would n't remain, of
course, if I took it — and the dog would n't remain: it
would come to bite me —and I'm sure I should n't
remain!"
“Then you think nothing would remain?" said the
Red Queen.
“I think that's the answer."
“Wrong, as usual," said the Red Queen: “the dog's
temper would remain."
“But I don't see how—
“Why, look here!" the Red Queen cried. “The dog
would lose its temper, would n't it?"
“Perhaps it would," Alice replied cautiously.
“Then if the dog went away, its temper would
remain!" the Queen exclaimed triumphantly.
Alice said, as gravely as she could, “They might go
different ways." But she could n't help thinking to
herself, “what dreadful nonsense we are talking!"
“She can't do sums a bit!" the Queens said together,
with great emphasis.
“Can you do sums?" Alice said, turning suddenly
on the White Queen, for she did n't like being found
fault with so much.
The Queen gasped and shut her eyes. “I can do
Addition," she said, “if you give me time — but I can't
do Subtraction under any circumstances!"
“Of course you know your A B C?" said the Red
Queen.
“To be sure I do," said Alice.
“So do I," the White Queen whispered: “we'll often
say it over together, dear. And I'll tell you a secret
—I can read words of one letter! Is n't that grand?
’!


224 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
“What did he want?" said the Red Queen.
“He said he would come in," the White Queen went
on, “because he was looking for a hippopotamus. Now,
as it happened, there was n't such a thing in the house,
that morning."
“Is there generally?" Alice asked in an astonished
tone.
“Well, only on Thursdays," said the Queen.
“I know what he came for," said Alice: “he wanted
to punish the fish, because —"
Here the White Queen began again. “It was such
a thunderstorm, you can't think!" (“She never could,
you know," said the Red Queen.) “And part of the
roof came off, and ever so much thunder got in — and
it went rolling round the room in great lumps —and
knocking over the tables and things — till I was so
frightened, I could n't remember my own name!"
Alice thought to herself, “I never should try to
remember my name in the middle of an accident! Where
would be the use of it?" but she did not say this aloud,
for fear of hurting the poor Queen's feelings.
“Your Majesty must excuse her," the Red Queen
said to Alice, taking one of the White Queen's hands in
her own, and gently stroking it: “she means well, but
she can't help saying foolish things, as a general rule."
The White Queen looked timidly at Alice, who felt
she ought to say something kind, but really could n't
think of anything at the moment.
“She never was really well brought up," the Red
Queen went on: “but it's amazing how good-tempered
she is! Pat her on the head, and see how pleased she'll
be!" But this was more than Alice had courage to do.


226 THROUGH THE LOOKING—GLASS
sounded more like a tune: at last she could even make
out words, and she listened so eagerly that, when the
two great heads suddenly vanished from her lap, she
hardly missed them.
She was standing before an arched doorway, over
which were the words “QUEEN ALICE" in large
letters, and on each side of the arch there was a bell-
handle; one was marked “Visitors' Bell," and the other
“Servants' Bell."
“I'll wait till the song's over," thought Alice, “and
then I'll ring the—the—which bell must I ring?"
she went on, very much puzzled by the names. “I'm
not a visitor, and I'm not a servant. There ought to
be one marked ‘Queen,' you know —"
Just then the door opened a little way, and a creature
with a long beak put its head out for a moment and said,
“N o admittance till the week after next!" and shut the
door again with a bang.
Alice knocked and rang in vain for a long time; but
at last a very old Frog, who was sitting under a tree,
got up and hobbled slowly towards her: he was dressed
in bright yellow, and had enormous boots on.
“What is it, now?" the Frog said in a deep hoarse
whisper.
Alice turned round, ready to find fault with anybody.
“Where 's the servant whose business it is to answer the
door?" she began angrily.
“Which door?" said the Frog.
Alice almost stamped with irritation at the slow draw!
in which he spoke. “This door, of course!"
The Frog looked at the door with his large dull eyes
for a minute: then he went nearer and rubbed it with


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 229
waiters set a leg of mutton before Alice, who looked at
it rather anxiously, as she had never had to carve a
joint before.
“You look a little shy: let me introduce you to that
leg of mutton," said the Red Queen. “Alice — Mutton:
Mutton — Alice." The leg of mutton got up in the
dish and made a little bow to Alice; and Alice returned
the bow, not knowing whether to be frightened or amused.
“May I give you a slice?" she said, taking up the
knife and fork, and looking from one Queen to the other.
“Certainly not," the Red Queen said, very decidedly:
“it is n't etiquette to cut any one you've been introduced
to. Remove the joint!" And the waiters carried it off,
and brought a large plum-pudding in its place.
“I won't be introduced to the pudding, please,"
Alice said rather hastily, “or we shall get no dinner at
all. May I give you some?"
But the Red Queen looked sulky, and growled,
“Pudding — Alice: Alice — Pudding. Remove the pud-
ding!" and the waiters took it away so quickly that Alice
could n't return its bow.
However, she did n't see why the Red Queen should
be the only one to give orders; so, as an experiment, she
called out, “Waiter! Bring back the pudding!" and
there it was again in a moment, like a conjuring-trick.
It was so large that she could n't help feeling a little
shy with it, as she had been with the mutton: however,
she conquered her shyness by a great effort, and cut a
slice and handed it to the Red Queen.
“What impertinence!" said the Pudding. “ I wonder
how you'd like it, if I were to cut a slice out of you, you
creature!"


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 23I
‘Bring it here! Let me sup!'
It is easy to set such a dish on the table.,
‘Take the dish cover up!'
Ah, that is so hard that I fear I 'm unable!
For it holds like glue —-
Holds the lid to the dish, while it lies in the middle:
Which is easiest to do,
Un-dish-cover the fish, or dishcover the riddle?"
“Take a minute to think about it, and then guess,"
said the Red Queen. “Meanwhile, we '11 drink your
health — Queen Alice's health!" she screamed at the
top of her voice, and all the guests began drinking it
directly, and very queerly they managed it; some of
them put their glasses upon their heads like extinguishers,
and drank all that trickled down their faces — others
upset the decanters, and drank the wine as it ran ofi the
edges of the table — and three of them (who looked like
kangaroos) scrambled into the dish of roast mutton,
and began eagerly lapping up the gravy, “just like pigs
in a trough!" thought Alice.
“You ought to return thanks in a neat speech," the
Red Queen said, frowning at Alice as she spoke.
“We must support you, you know," the White Queen
whispered, as Alice got up to do it, very obediently, but
a little frightened.
“Thank you very much," she whispered in reply,
“but I can do quite well without."
“That would n't be at all the thing," the Red Queen
said very decidedly: so Alice trial to submit to it with
a good grace.
(“And they did push so!" she said afterwards, when
she was telling her sister the history of the feast. “You


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 233
“I can't stand this any longer!" she cried, as she
jumped up and seized the table-cloth with both hands:
one good pull, and plates, dishes, guests, and candles
came crashing down together in a heap on the floor.
“And as for you," she went on, turning fiercely upon
the Red Queen, whom she considered as the cause of
all the mischief — but the Queen was no longer at her
side; she had suddenly dwindled down to the size of a
little doll, and was now on the table, merrily running
round and round after her own shawl, which was trailing
behind her.
At any other time, Alice would have felt surprised
at this, but she was far too much excited to be surprised
at anything now. “As for you," she repeated, catching
hold of the little creature in the very act of jumping over
a bottle which had just lighted upon the table, “I'll
shake you into a kitten, that I will!"


CHAPTER XI
WAKING
— and it really was a kitten, after all.
235


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 237
a merry laugh. “And curtsey while you're thinking
what to —— what to purr. It saves time, remember!"
And she caught it up and gave it one little kiss, “just
in honor of its having been a Red Queen."
“Snowdrop, my pet!" she went on, looking over her
shoulder at the White Kitten, which was still patiently
undergoing its toilet, “when will Dinah have finished
with your White Majesty, I wonder? That must be
the reason you were so untidy in my dream.———— Dinah!
Do you know that you're scrubbing a White Queen?
Really, it's most disrespectful of you!
“And what did Dinah turn to, I wonder?" she
prattled on, as she settled comfortably down, with one
elbow on the rug, and her chin in her hand, to watch the
kittens. “Tell me, Dinah, did you turn to Humpty
Dumpty? I think you did ——however, you'd better
not mention it to your friends just yet, for I'm
not sure.
“By the way, Kitty, if only you'd been really with
me in my dream, there was one thing you would have
enjoyed ———I had such a quantity of poetry said to me,
all about fishes! To-morrow morning you shall have a
real treat. All the time you're eating your breakfast,
I'll repeat ‘The Walrus and the Carpenter‘ to you; and
then you can make believe it's oysters, dear!
“Now, Kitty, let's consider who it was that dreamed
it all. This is a serious question, my dear, and you should
not go on licking your paw like that — as if Dinah had n't
washed you this morning! You see, Kitty, it must
have been either me or the Red King. He was part of
my dream, of course — but then I was part of his dream,
too! Was it the Red King, Kitty? You were his wife,


AND WHAT ALICE FOUND THERE 239
A boat, beneath a sunny sky
Lingering onward dreamily
In an evening of July-
Children three that nestle near,
Eager eye and willing ear,
Pleased a simple tale to hear —
Long has poled that sunny sky:
Echoes fade and memories die:
Autumn frosts have slain July.
Still she haunts me, phantomwise,
Alice moving under skies
Never seen by waking eyes.
Children yet, the tale to hear,
Eager eye and willing ear,
Lovingly shall nestle near.
In a Wonderland they lie,
Dreaming as the days go by,
Dreaming as the summers die:
Ever drifting down the stream —
Lingering in the golden gleam —
Life, what is it but a dream?
THE END


AN EASTER GREETING
TO EVERY CHILD WHO LOVES
“ALICE"
DEAR CHILD:
Please to fancy, if‘ you can, that you are reading a
real letter, from a real friend who'm you have seen, and
whose voice you can seem to yourself to hear wishing you,
as I do now with all my heart, a happy Easter.
Do you know that delicious, dreamy feeling when one
first awakes on a summer morning, with the twitter of
birds in the air, and the fresh breeze coming in at the open
window when, lying lazily with eyes half shut, one sees as
in a dream green boughs waving, or waters rippling in
a golden light? It is a pleasure very near to sadness, bring-
ing tears to one's eyes like a beautiful picture or poem.
And is not that a Mother's gentle hand that undraws
your curtains, and a Mother's sweet voice that sum-
mons you to rise? T 0 rise and forget, in the bright
sunlight, the ugly dreams that frightened you so when
all was dark—to rise and enjoy another happy day, first
kneeling to thank that unseen Friend, who sends you the
beautiful sun?
Are these strange words from a writer of such tales as
“Alice"? And is this a strange letter to find in a book of
nonsense? It may be so. Some, perhaps, may blame one
for thus mixing together things grave and gay; others may
smile and think it odd that any one should speak of solemn
things at all, except in church and on a Sunday; but
240


AN EASTER GREETING an
I think—nay, I am sure—that some children will read
this gently and lovingly, and in the spirit in which I have
written it.
For I do not believe God means us thus to divide life
into two halves —to wear a grave face on Sunday, and to
think it out-of-place to even so much as mention Him on
a week-day. Do you think He cares to see only kneeling
figures, and to hear only tones of prayer—and that He
does not also love to see the lambs leaping in the sunlight,
and to hear the merry voices of the children, as they roll
among the hay? Surely their innocent laughter is as sweet
in His ears as the grandest anthem that ever rolled up from
the “dim, religious light" of some solemn cathedral?
And if I have written anything to add to those stores of
innocent and healthy amusement that are laid up in books
for the children I love so well, it is surely something I may
hope to look back upon without shame and sorrow (as how
much of life must then be recalled I) when MY turn comes
to walk through the valley of shadows.
This Easter sun will rise on you, dear child, feeling
your “life in every limb," and eager to rush out into the
fresh morning air — and many an Easter-day will come
and go, before it finds you feeble and gray-headed, creeping
wearily out to bask once more in the sunlight — but it is
good, even now, to think sometimes of that great morning
when the “Sun of Righteousness shall arise with healing
in his wings."
Surely your gladness need not be the less for the thought
that you will one day see a brighter dawn than this — when
lovelier sights will meet your eyes than any waving trees
or rippling waters — when angel hands shall undraw your
curtains, and sweeter tones than ever loving Mother breathed


242 AN EASTER GREETING
shall wake you to a new and glorious day — and when all
the sadness and the sin that darkened life on this little earth
shall be forgotten like the dream of a night that is past!
Your aflectionate friend,
EASTER, I876 LEWIS CARROLL