- | - - p. e w. s. | . t. - d * -- | ---||| |- | |. - g|| | | * - | | | |||||- --|| -- |-|--- --|| £ | - - |-| | - | | cornell university library date due gay lord printed in u.s a. t *''' r& w. s. gilbert’s plays. original plays by w. s. gilbert. in four series. st. mar'rm’s library edition, pott vo, cloth, gilt top, :. net each; leather, gilt edges, :. net each. the flrst series contains: the wicked world-— pygmalion and galatea-—chaiity—'l‘he princess—t he palace of truth-—trial by jury-iolanthe. the second series: broken hearts—engaged—- sweethearts — gretchen — dan’l druce-— tom cobb—- i-i.m.s. ‘ pinafore ’——the sorcerer -— the pirates of penzance. the third series: comedy and tragedy—fog- gety’s fairy—rosencrantz and gziildenstern——patience —princess ida-—the mikado—ruddig re—the yeomen of the guard—the gondolicrs—the mounteb'anks— utopia, limited. the fourth series: the fairy’s dilemma-—the grand duke—his exce lency—“l.iaste to the wedding” -—fallen fairies-—the gentleman in black—branting- hame hall—creatures of impulse—randa l’s thumb- the fortune-hunter-—thespis. the gilbert and sullivan birtilda\’ book: quotations for every day in the year, selected from plays by w. s. gilbert set to music by arthur sullivan. compiled by alex. w atson. royal i mo, cloth, :. .-:’. london : chatto & windus, iii st. m.\r'rix’s lane, w.c. original plays fourth series . l__ ellis -’ walery, photo. /p //$wz»° -m- original plays - by m w. s. gilbert fo uarth sea /e.s containing the fairy's dilemma, the grand duke, his excellency, “haste to the wedding,” fallen fairies, the gentleman in black, brantinghame hall, creatures of impulse, randall’s thumb, the fortune-hunter, thespis with a portrait i, o n do n c hat to & wind us i l ; /i/ ‘)')»r)'l\_ >- contents. the fairy’b dilemma tun: grand duke his excellency “haste to the wnnnlng” fallen fzmmzs tar. gentleman black brantinghame hall creatures or imrulse . randalu trmas . tm: fortune-hunter . tnes > _s . . . . the falry’s dilemma. an original doiliest./c pantomlme, in two acts. pro ducea’ at the garrick t healre, lomian, under the management ’ mr. a rllmr bourclzier. w; dramatis personze. s upernaturals. the demon alcohol mr. jerrold ronertsii.uv. tm: fairy roszsvn miss jessie bateman- imps, goblins, fairies, etc. unnaturals. col. sm tnnvoa mavmzvnnza, _ ba‘rt., ¢. the household cavalry mr. arthur bouroi’her. (afterwards clown .) the rev. aloysws par!‘itt, m.a., oj“s. pm-abola’.'e " ... _mr. . b. c.{.ari: _ici=.. (afterwards harlequin.) mr. justice wiior'i:i._e, of the high ' uz'lqfjuz icatm'c ... mr. syl)nl'zy vai.ii it niz. (afterwards ptmialoon.) the lanv arman we.u. >s ' ne, .da'u_qhte-rq/‘ the marquis ¢y‘harrow... m ss violet vaunrvgii._ ‘ (afterwards c'olimibiize.) clarisba, daughter qf mr. justice whortle... . ... m ss dogeotuy grt ttzsroge. mas. crumnle, iiousekeeper to mr. pm,"/i'tt _., ,,, m ss ewell. act i. b'nus . the abode of the demon al(johol. scem: . the vioarage, act ii. scene . mr. justice whortle;s cboquet lawn . scem: . cloudland. scene . grand.transformation scene: the revolving realms ,’ radiant rehabilitation! scem: . pastrycook’s and lcheesemongers, shops.; _°!¥_ i ? ._'. ’ ‘ .i_e \'i. ai"~age, the fairy's dilemma. act. i. scene .—the abode of the demon alcohol. imps discovered round cauldron, labelled “rhymes.” #y bustle about, fetching words that rhyme with each other, | and putting them into the cauldron, over which an imp presides. an imp goes off and fetches a label, “bones”; another goes off and fetches another label, “jones.” they both put labels into cauldron, which the presiding imp stirs up. a third imp fetches a label, “town"; a fourth fetches a label, “brown.” both labels are thrown into cauldron. first imp fetches label, “myth”; second imp fetches label, “smith.” both labels thrown into cauldron. presiding imp stirs them all up together. flames issue from cauldron as each pair of labels is thrown in. gong. the demon alcohol appears through scene. ) al. it is a demon's fate that every time he speaks he must express himself in rhyme, and though to do my utmost i endeavour, for rhyme and metre i've no ear whatever. so, business being slack, i've ordered you, my faithful imps (a most painstaking crew), with careful judgment and discretion wary, to cook me up a rhyming dictionary, which i can study in my hours of leisure. is the job finished? [imps imply assent. a large volume labelled “rhyming dictionary” rises out of cauldron amid flames. alcohol takes it and opens it. . - - here's indeed a treasure ! - (to imps) be off! i thank you all! (they go off.) now that . they've gone - - - - i'll have an hour's study all alone. (cauldron sinks through trap.) - [alcohol sits on rock and opens the fairy’s dil"emma. of jiugling rhymes here is a storehouse, quite-— (reads) “white, bright, light, tight, fight, might, sight, bite, hight, kite"; “ clue, jew, true, blue, rue, new, too, few, do, coo ! ” [gong-—faiuy rosmsuo appears. (annoyed) come in! rose. good morning! al. who the deuce are you? rose. a fairy-—and my name is rosebud. al. is it ! greatly indebted to you for this visit. what do you want? rose, with worry i’m quite dizzy: (implov-z'n_ql_ /) i want your help ! al. (reverting to book). some other time : i’m busy. rose. that’s very rude, and rudeness i detest. (pitiably) i’m in an awful fix ! al. are you ? poor old girl! all right, i’ll do my best. rose (almost crying). of all good fairies pm the most unlucky ! for everything goes wrong! al. " now look here, ducky, * .. i twig your methods. every blessed time you make a point of leaving it to me to find the rhy e; that’s an old dodge of yours—your favourite ticket-z it’s all very well, young woman, but it isn’t cricket. f rose (speaking prose). come, i don’t want to be hard on you. we’re quite alone, and nobody will know. your verse is abominably faulty ; suppose we drop into prose ? al. well, that’s very nice of you. it’ll save a lot of trouble. these confounded rhymes simply drive me crazy. rose. yes—they’re not your strong point. i’ve heard you rhyme “ side-board ” with “ school-board ” ! al. well, what’s the matter with that? rose. and “ well-wisher ” with “ extinguisher ” ! you know you’re a perfect goose ! _ al. well, never mind that now. sit down, rosy, and let’s be cosy._ come, that’s not so bad! rose. cosy, indeed ! you surely don’t expect me to be cosy with a person of your stamp! you seem to forget that i’m a good fairy. good fairies have to be very particular. / az. how dull. ‘\' rose. it is dull. now, "’’e an aunt who is a bad fairy- dark, black hair, heavy eyebrows, dresses in black and red satin—- - . al. i know her. z.a.e. a.a.a. y's dj.leam/ma. - rose. well, you’ve no idea what a good time she has— although she's not received. however, to business. al. (seductively). now, come and sit here—do ! rose. you've such a way with you, i never did! well, iust for once, although it's really very wrong. (she sits by him; he puts his arm round her waist.) now, do behave ! (removes his arm.) i'm not my aunt, you know ! now, it's my duty as a good fairy to watch over respectable young couples and bring their courtship to a happy termination, and it's your duty as a demon to thwart this intention by every means in your power. now, there's been very little doing in my line of late—and i've received a pretty strong hint from the fairy queen that if i don’t find a worthy young couple to protect, whose courtship is threatened with destruction by a malevolent demon, amy office will be abolished, and i shall be relegated to dance in the back rows with the stout ones. . and that's a pretty look-out, isn’t it? al. it isn’t cheery. but where do i come in ? rose. i’ll tell you. after a deal of trouble i’ve found the very people i want—a mild young clergyman of blameless life, and a very respectable hospital nurse, who are over head and ears in love with each other. now, the hospital nurse— al. pretty? rose. fine girl—is pursued by colonel sir trevor mauleverer, a wicked baronet in the life guards, whose intentions towards her are too dreadful to talk about. will you believe it, this bold, bad man actually intends to carry her off to his flat in- al. i know–shaftesbury avenue. itose. not this time—whitehall mansions. al. oh, naughty, naughty! but are you sure of your facts? • itose. no doubt at all about them. why, i’ve seen him making love to her ! al. sure he doesn’t want to marry her? rose. want to marry her ! don't i tell you he's a baronet! al. i see—a bad baronet! rose. why, aren't all baronets bad? one would think you'd never read a shilling shocker in your life now, i want you to introduce yourself to sir trevor mauleverer and explain that you’re his familiar spirit—that you know he entertains the worst designs against this young woman, and that you are willing to help him in every way. he'll jump at your offer. you'll carry her off to whitehall mansions, and i’ll interfer just in time—before any mischief happens, you know-f restore her to the arms of her faithful clergyman. the fairy’s dilemma. al. (who has been listening in amazement). well, i’m da-—- (reoollects himself )-—-i beg pardon! rose. oh, don’t mind me, george. . al. i really couldn't help it. it relieves one’s feelings. besides, it’s so expressive. rose. and so true. al. eh? ah—yes—-yes—exactly. but look here, for a good fairy you’re an uncommonly cool hand. rose. good fairies are naturally cooler than demons. al. but, i say, aren’t you playing it rather low down for a good fairy? ' '- rose. what do you mean? al. respectable young girl, you know—clerical over—bad baronet—flat in whitehall mansions, eh ?’ rose. well, you are squeamish! don’t i tell you that i mean to rescue her and restore her to her young man before any harm can possibly happene? a al. yes, you did say that. but, rosy—come a little nearer. rose. no, it’s not right. besides, your scales scratch. al. (wlleedlingly). what am i to get for this, eh ? rose. get for it l oh, you don’t wantto get anything for it. a good action is its own reward. (aside.) he’s rather a dear! i wish he wasn’t so spotty! . . al. now, if i get you out of this scrape—(pm thinking of settling, you know)—if i get you out of this scrape, and we make it all trumps, eh? what do you say, rosy? rose. oh, i couldn’t think of it! that is a .matter that i must absolutely decline to discuss—at present. now, i must be off. i’ve got to change a respectable young plumber and a good plain cook into harlequin and columbine——and the electric light is a consideration. [backing towards opening. al. but look here, don’t be in.a hurry. suppose it turns out all right, eh ? rose. well, if you carry off theyoung woman—and. if i interfere just in time—and if i succeed in reuniting the young people—and if the fairy queen is pleased—and if i'm not relegated to the back rows among the stout ones-—and if it all turns out trumps-— al. (eagerly). well? rose. well, i’ll see! [she steps back into opening, whicli closes. stage darkens. end or sceue i. .the fair y ’s dilemma. ' jam tart and custards sces]; ii.—izvt <:a oe or the vicarage or s. pmasola. the rev. aloysius pail <‘i'i." ‘ discovered playing “ ihe lost chord” on izarmonium. camera with stand, etc., mns. crumble, his housekeeper, also discovered. aloy. mrs. crumble? mrs. c. yes, sir. aloy. i am expecting a few friends to luncheon. sir trevor mauleverer, miss clarissa whortle mrs. c. the young lady which he’s going to marry, sir? aloy. never mind that—and' nurse jane collins, who is in attendance on lady whortle. fvlrs. c. yes, sii'—the young lady which you’re going to marry, sir. aloy. sir trevor and i are certainly engaged to these young ladies, but that is not now the question. we will confine our- selves, if you please, to the question, which is—what do you propose to give us for luncheon? mrs. c. there’s yesterday’s chicken, sir, which will make a beautiful “ devil.” aloy. er-—no, i think not. i should prefer yesterday’s chicken cooked in any other way. a salmi, for instance. mrs. c. and there’s a nice little leg of lamb that came from wales yesterday. that, with apple dumplings and an open . . aloy. will do extremely well. at half-past one, mrs. ‘ crumble. mrs. g. it shall be ready, sir. oh, sir, i do ‘hope miss clarissa will be happy with sir trevor! aloy. why should you concern yourself about that, mrs. crumble ? mrs. . why, sir, these military baronights! well, i can’t say as i holds with military baronights. aloy. (reproachfully). how unjust you are! what harm have military baronets ever done to you, mrs. crumble’! mrs. c. lor, sir, no harm whatever! the ideal only in all the stories as i ever read, whenever i come across a military baronight i know as he’s going to turn out unsatisfactory. aloy. you need have no apprehension in this instance. sir trevor mauleverer is one of my oldest friends—a thorough english gentleman of the best type. .the fairy ’s dilemma. mrs. c. i’m very glad to hear it, sir, for miss clarissa——- aloy. now never mind miss clarissa. you can go, mrs. crumble. mrs. . yes, sir. [emit mns. crumble. aloy. mrs. crumble’s questions are inconvenient, .and her deductions incorrect, but i am happy to say that i have con- trived to answer her without any violation the truth. sir trevor is engaged, but not to clarissa whortle. i am also engaged, but not to nurse collins. so far, all is satisfactory, but what did mrs. crumble mean by her remark about military baronets? mere ignorant prejudice, of course. trevor would never—no, no, of course not. it’s merely manner on his part- nothing but manner. still, i do sometimes wish that he-} (noise without.) who is that? not the new curate, i hope. enter sib. trevor in undress um:/'orm. sir t. aloysius, my dear fellow-—— aloy. trevor, my old friend! [they shake hands. sir t. this‘is a critical moment, aloysius! in an hour’s time we shall have achieved the good deed to which we solemnly pledged ourselves a year ago ! in one hour we shall be married men! aloy. yes—still, i cannot help wishing that the humane and unselfish work to which we have so earnestly dedicated ourselves could have been achieved without resort to a deception which, harmless though it be, is a deception nevertheless. sir t. i think you are, perhaps, over-sensitive on this point. recollect that, maddened with righteous indignation at the oppression to which weak, helpless, and submissive women are but too often subjected at the hands of arbitrary, dictatorial, and mercenary parents, we solemnly vowed that we would devote ourselves, heart and soul, to the emancipation of the very first instances of such oppression that came to our knowledge— even though it were necessary to take the extreme course of marrying them in order to release them from such inhuman thraldom. aloy. no doubt, no doubt. clarissa/s father, mr. justice ‘nhortle, an extremely irritable, arbitrary, and dictatorial old person, insisted upon her marrying one of three men of wealth and title. sir t. i had the honour of being one of the three. aloy. you had the honour of being one of the three. seeing no other way to avert the doom with which the helpless girl the f/t €y’s dilemma. was threatened, i promised her that as soon as she came of age i would go so far as to make her my wife. she came of age yesterday, and we are to be married before the registrar to-day. sir t. prompt. aloy. yes, short reckonings make long husbands. nurse collins is, i have no doubt, equally the victim of some description of oppression, and you, i am convinced, have equally sacrificed yourself at the altar of altruistic self- abuegation. sir t. (after a pause). aloysius, i am about to confide to you a secret which, hitherto, i have confided to no one. the lady whom you know as jane collins, the hospital nurse, is no other than the lady angela wealdstone, only child of the haughty and despotic marquis of harrow! aloy. the lady who ran away from home a year ago ? bless my heart, you don’t say so! sir t. the marquis had insisted on her marrying the wealthy but disreputable duke of danderly, whom she regarded with absolute detestation. at that time lady angela was a year under age and a ward in chancery. so, at my suggestion, she left her home, and, changing her name to jane collins, she entered herself as probationer at bushey heath cottage hospital. she is now a fully qualified nurse, and as such i procured her an engagement to attend on lady whortle, who, as you know, is a chronic invalid. lady angela also came of age yesterday, and we are also to be married before the registrar to-day. aloy. yes. there are, however, two points upon which i confess my conscience is uneasy. although i embarked upon my engagement to clarissa from a simple sense of duty, i cannot conceal from myself that, despite a certain tendency to frivolity, which it will be y constant study to correct, i have grown to be strongly attac ed to clarissa. sir t. and, between ourselves, i am devotedly fond of angela. aloy. indeed! ihad no idea of this. sir t. iam devotedly fond of angela, but as her affection for me is based entirely on the belief that i am sacrificing my life’s happiness to her interests, it won’t do to let her know, just yet, how particularly happy i am to be permitted to do so. now, what is the second point that exercises you ? aloy. why, the deception to which i have been a passive party—my having allowed everyone to suppose that i was engaged to lady angela, whereas i was really engaged to " io t he fa ? i/"s dileaima. clarissa! it is true that i never said as much to any one, but —i never contradicted it. ‘ sir t. my dear boy, the arrangement was made with the full consent and connivance of both ladies, and no one has any right to complain. after all, what does it amount to? you are supposed to be engaged to lady angela, whereas you are really engaged to miss clarissa. i am supposed to be engaged to miss clarissa, whereas i am really engaged to lady a.ngela—and both ladies enter, heart and soul, into the arrangement! [enter claaissa wnorvtle, and lam: angela wealdstone. lady angela is dressed in the costume of a professional hospital nurse, with long cloak, cottage bon/net, grey dress, white bib and apron, etc. clarissa wears a handsome mantle and elaborate picture hat. clar. (politely). good morning, sir trevor. aloysius, my dearly loved one! (embraces aloysrus.) . lady an. (politely). how do you do, mr. parfitt? trevor, dearest trevor, are we late ? (embracing sm tnevoe.) sir ll’. my dear angela, you could never be too soon, and you never are too late. lady an. (alarmed). hush, trevor—y u forget! sir t. n o. i have confided our secret to mr. parfitt. lady an. have you ? and i have told clarissa ! clar. yes ; j ane—i mean lady angela—has told me every- thing. lady an. you are not angry with me, mr. parfitt, for this innocent little deception? aloy. i have, alas! forfeited all right, lady angela, to be hyperoritical where an innocent deception is concerned. . lady an. oh, don’t take a professional view of so. small a matter, mr. parfittl if i had passed under my own name, i should have been discovered at once, and restored by my trustees to my inhuman father’s custody. . aloy. (calmly). and is clarissa happy? clar. happy! i should think so! are we not to be married to-day? am i not to be made his whose noble altruism has rescued me from a doom worse than death itself? (recollecting herself.) oh, i beg your pardon, sir ‘trevor! sir t. pray don't! i quite understand. clar. what i mean is that marriage, under compulsion, with any gentleman, however eligible, must be distasteful to a girl who . the fa[ry’.s‘ dilemiiia. : "sir t. but i was not eligible. i was already engaged to lady angela. . clar. now, if you had been free aloy. clarissa, let us not pursue this painful theme into the embarrassing fields of illusive hypothesis. it is enough that your father insisted upon your marriage with a gentleman who, for whatever reason, was not to your taste, and that i interfered to prevent it. lady an. it’s like a tale of old chivalry! two poor help- less maidens, in dire straits, rescued by two gallant knight- errants, who had pledged themselves to sacrifice their life’s happiness in their service! ah, trevor,i would that i were worthy of you! /sir t. take heart, angela, it may be that you are. lady an. dearest! clar. in one short hour we shall be each other’s. but before that can be, my father, who is going to open the commission, will stop here on his way that you may photograph him in his robes. aloy. it was so arranged yesterday. everything is pre- pared. there is one point to which i should like to draw your attention. in the presence of the judge it is unhappily necessary that i should address myself in terms of endear- ment to lady angela, and that trevor should direct his attentions to yourself. may i suggest that we do not over-act our parts? lady an. i’m sure, mr. parfitt, you are always most par- ticular upon that point. such perfunctory endearments as are necessary to the situation have been performed by you with a delicacy—a self-restraint which-—- aloy. a—yes. i—i was not referring to myself, lady angela. but, to be frank, i have noticed a teudency—unin- tentional, i need hardly say—on the part of our good friend trevor in his attentions to clarissa to unnecessarily accentuate the situation. that he does so and that she reciprocates it in the warmth of their enthusiasm in a good cause, i am con- vinced; but still—they do it. sir t. my dear fellow, if i am to be natural, i must not be hampered. it has ever been the maxim of the mauleverers to do what they had to do with all the energy at their command. it’s in the blood. aloy. i see. i didn’t know it was in the blood—that makes a difference, of course. at the same time? clar. aloysius, i think you are unjust. you cannot but be aware that we have to create a certain impression, and that we . the fair]/"s dilemma. must be realistic if we are to beconvincing. i love you, dearest aloysius, with a fervour—with a devotion—- enter ms. j ustrce wnontmr. in fall robes and full-bottomed wig, ushered by mas. crumble. eolarissa, turning to sir. tsevos with simulated afic- tion, continues- —with a devotion, with an enthusiasm which i can scarcely expect you, dearest trevor, to rival in the overflowing fulness of its intensity. it is not in man’s nature to do so, and i do not complain. (lady angela has crossed afectionately to aloysius, who, formerly holding her at arm’s length by the waist, is much preoccupied by the proceedings of clarissa with sis tnnvon.) lady an. aloysius, dearly loved one, tell me, shall the little sitting-room be pink or blue? aloy. (preoccupied). i think, perhaps, a quiet plaid judge (who has been watching them). nearly finished your endearments? they’re a little oloying! clar. (in afeoted surprise). papal you here already! judge. yes, come now, be quick. i can’t keep the grand jury waiting. where shall i sit? here? (goes to chair up stage.) . aloy. that will do excellently, sir john. permit me. (arranges robes, then foousses, rather nervously.) lady an. sir john, you must allow me to compliment you upon the impressive effect of your judicial robes. ' judge. rather tasty, i think. but it’s not so much the robes as the wig. there’s a great deal more in this wig than you’d . suppose, miss collins. lady an. that i can quite believe, sir john. judge. yes. now observe. without it (taking it of) i am simply an intellectual middle-aged gentleman of a refined and cultivated type; but with it, miss collins (putting it on), i am at once the embodiment of the abstract majesty of the law— three centuries of the concentrated wisdom of both houses of parliamentin tabloid form. (business offocussing.) clar. (aside to lady angela). papa always keeps his wig by his bedside at night, and whenever argument runs high he puts it on, and mamma knocks under at once. aloy. how would you like to be taken, sir john ? solemnly, as delivering a judgment"? judge. no, i think not. humorously, as cutting a judicial the fairy ’s dilemma. i joke. judicial humour is my strong point. a trial at law is an extremely serious matter for both parties, and both parties are generally in a condition of heart-aching despondency until the verdict is delivered. i hold it to be a kind act, a consider- ate act, and a consolatory act on the part of the judge to relieve that depression, to dissipate that despondency, and to cause both parties to forget, if possible, the important issues at stake by indulging them with a course of jocular comment—of light- hearted faceiias, and in short, with adisplay of general a—a—- sir t. tomfoolery? . judge. a—well, yes—thank you, sir trevor—that’s not quite the word i wanted, but something of that description. i flatter myself that “ roars of laughter, in which the learned judge could not help joining,” is a paragraph that appears more often in cases tried before me than in any other court of justice in the kingdom. aloy. (timidly). but, if i may venture to make a suggestion, sir john, a jooular attitude would be scarcely in keeping with: judge (angrily). but you may not venture to make a sug- gestion, mr. parfitt. i am not here to receive suggestions ! (aloysrus in great terror.) i am here to be photographed in my own fashion, and unless i am photographed in my own fashion, i will not be photographed at all. (very'angry.) ular. but, papa, do listen to reason—-—— judge. great seal! haven’t i been listening to reason all the time i’ve been talking ? (getting up.) however, there’s an end of the matter. call my carriage. (comes down.) aloy. oh, sir john, pray don’t be angry! indeed, i meant for the best ! judge. “ meant for the best!” ular. papa, i’m so sorry i vexed you ! judge. “ sorry you vexed me!” sir t. come, sir john, don’t be severe"with my darling clarissa—poor little popsy-wopsy, tiddle toddlecumsl (fond- ling her.) judge. “popsy-wopsy, tiddle toddlecums!” (during this, aloysws has been empressing annoyance at sir tnevor’s display of afection towards clamssa, and is gestieulating to him to re- frain.) if you are an epileptic, sir, say so, and you shall be treated accordingly. (sulkily resumes his seat. aloysrus at camera.) i am but little accustomed to be dictated to, and i will not submit to it—i will not submit to it. (boiling with suppressed anger.) are you ready, sir‘! ,_aloy. quite ready,'sir john. (judge suddenly assumes a i the fa ry’s dilemma. grotesque and jocular attitude and empression, in strong contrast with his recent anger.) steady, sir j ohn—keep your eye upon this picture. judge (fu/rious). i will not keep my eye upon that picture. i shall look where i please. (resumes jocular attitude.) aloy. (very frightened). now then-—one, two, three, four! (puts cap on camera.) thank you, sir j ohn. judge (resuming his fury). and so you may, sir. it is the last time i put myself to this inconvenience to meet your wishes. (to mes. crumble). call my carriage. good mo[rning. emit. [as soon as he has gone clamssa rushes to aloysius, lady angela to str teevoe. lady an. now that that grumpy old gentleman has gone we can talk at our crse. ’ clur. dearest aloysius, you are vexed. don’t be angry with poor papa! he’s really very funny in court. aloy. it is not your papa, clarissa, with whom i am vexed. i do think, trevor (i am sure it’s unintentional), but i do think that you and clarissa overdo it. sir t. my dear fellow, i must play the game! [j ange heard speaking without. clauissa runs to sir tnnvon, lady angela to aloysius. clabissa and sm tnnvoe as afectionate lovers, aloysius holding lady angela in a constrained attitude at arm’s length. j udgf. enters. judge. my threc—cornered hat—i forgot my three-cornered hat! oh, here it is! (finds his hat and eatit.) " ' ‘. lady an. has he really gone, clarissa ‘i. olar. yes, dear; the carriage has driven off at last! [clarissa reverts to aloysros and lady angela to sir teevoe. , aloy. then, my dear clarissa, we should do well to repair at once to the registrar, and beg the good man to unite us with all convenient despatch. i confess that it pains me to have to resort to an opposition establishment—it savours of disloyalty to my cloth—but there is no other way, and we will be married in church as soon as the civil process has made you mine beyond dispute. the fly is waiting. . sir t. and when you come back it will be our turn to enlist that gentleman’s good services-—and then it will be our painful duty to break the news to our respective fathers-in-law—i to the marquis—that won’t be pleasant—— ' the fa i'y’s dilemma. aloy. and i to the judge. that—that will require a little tact. sir t. just a little tact. by the way, excuse me for two minutes. they’ve been altering the regimental uniform——- lady a. what, again? sir t. yes—and i want to send a wire to my tailor. ’ll be back directly. [lflmit sm tnevor. om. are you ready, dear aloysius ? aloy. yes, yes; i’m ready. but if you will allow me to makefa suggestion, clarissa, it seems to me that the hat and mantle you are wearing are scarcely in accordance with the modest and unobtrusive nature of the process to which we are about to submit ourselves; wc—we desire rather to avoid_ observation than to court it. gla’r. why, i bought this ‘hat on purpose to do honour to the occasion! besides, it’s too late now--—i can’t go home and chanve. _ laciiy an. let me make a suggestion. pin up your skirt, take my bonnet and veil and apron and cloak, and then any one who sees you will be sure to take you for me. _ aloy. really, my dear clarissa, lady angela’s kind and thoughtful proposal appears to me to solve the difficulty. _f clar. _(r}: nt :zf .tg‘ hat aaéi z z m lzt l)e).d d yc ) u glllfik _\/velli you w s course i s a e one. u oysius, gave seven guineas for that hat! " [emit with ai~igela’s cloak, bonnet, veil, and apron, . leaving her own behind. " aloy. (very respeczf/'ully). and now, lady angela, that we are alone, permit me to express a modest hope that the per- functory embraces which the unfortunate but autocratic necessities of the situation have compelled me to bestow upon you have been conceived and executed with as much delicacy and personal repression as the distressmg circumstances of the case permitted. " _ _' lady an. m ‘. parfitt, you have been, if anythmg, too discreet. . . aloy. thank you, lady angela. if, in the reckless abandon- ment of the moment, i have been too fiery_—if i should unhappily have exceeded the strict limit of what is customary between engaged couples, i beg you will not attribute it to a desire to take an unmauly advantage of the relations which are supposed t ‘ t between us. . r o i/fxlzzsly an. mi". parfitt, you have shown yourself throughout the transaction to be a gentleman who is actuated by an ex- aggeratedly delicate appreciation of what is due to a lady whom the fair!/’s dilemma. circumstances have placed in a most difficult and equivocal situation. f aloy. lady angela, i most respectfully beg to thank you or—— [gong. at this moment the faiby rosenvn appears through back of scene. they are both conscious that a third person is present, though they have not seen her. aloysms suddenly changes his manner, and addressing lady angela with efusion, con- tinues—- as i was saying, i respectfully thank you for the overwhelming ove—the whole-souled affection—the unutterably tender de- votion with which you have so amply endowed me, my respect- fully adored young friend ! lady an. (as :/' suddenly conscious of the presence of a third person). but hush, my aloysius, we are observed! [they are much surprised at seeing the fairy. lady an. dear me, what a very singular young person! aloy. may i be permitted to ask--—whom i have the pleasure of addressing ! rose. i am the fairy rosebud. i am here to help both you and mr. parfitt, dear. such love as yours we fairies much admire, and i’ll afford the aid that you require. aloy. but there’s some mistake—we are not in need of any assistance at present. and in this costume—and at a vicarage! in all my experience i- never saw anything so—so inadequate! lady an. it’s perfectly scandalous—in a vicarage! rose. i understand your feelings, and would spare ‘em, but i’m : fairy, and i've got to wear ‘c . in the fond love that yoe’’e just now protested as a good fairy i’m much interested; though threatened by a scheme of foulest tissue, your love i’ l pilot to a happy issue ! aloy. but, really—— lady an. i think, mr. parfitt, that if we make it quite clear to this young person that we are thoroughly competent to conduct our own affairs without supernatural intervention, she will, perhaps, be so good as to apply her protective machinery to some young couple to whom it may be of service. aloy. really, miss—a—a—i did not catch your name? rose. i am the fairy rosebud —i am here?- aloy. really, miss rosebud. i assure you that we have no occasion for your services. and if you are blessed with parents who are still living, may we suggest that you repair at once to _-mm- the fairy's dilemma. old mr. and mrs. rosebud, and point out to them the absolute necessity of their providing you with an outfit that shall be in stricter accordance with prevailing prejudices. rose, don't be absurd, but listen ere i go. a wicked demon, my official foe, intends to carry off your bosom's pride- - the fair jane £ standing by your side- and place her in your hated rival's power: this he'll effect in less than half-an-hour. but do not fear, i shall be close at hand to thwart the ill my demon foe has planned. [going to opening. aloy. but, my good woman, permit me to assure you that you are entirely mistaken in supposing- rose. mistaken happily for both your sakes the fairy rosebud never makes mistakes : you'll live her faultless judgment to extol- but one word more-beware of alcohol! (disappears.) lady an. well, this places us in a pleasant predicament, mr. parfitt ! that muddle-headed young woman is about to put her foot into it to an extent of which she has no notion. aloy. it's extremely embarrassing, lady angela. she wouldn’t give me time to explain. lady an. and then, “beware of alcohol” indeed! as if we were addicted to anything of the kind. aloy. i am sure, lady angela, we are most abstemious— most abstemious. a glass of light claret or a little ginger beer— lady an. do you really think she's a fairy? aloy. well, lady angela, i set up no pretensions to be considered a judge of fairies, but she certainly appeared and disappeared in a most unaccountable manner. lady an. here comes clarissa—how astonished she will be aloy. i think, perhaps, lady angela, it would be better for me to break this embarrassing little incident to clarissa on our way to the registrar's. ah, here she is ! enter clarissa in lady angela's bonnet, apron, clo" streamers, etc., and looking, with her veil down, exact/ lady angela looked at her entrance. lady an. my dear clarissa, the disguise is perfect. no c would know you. iv. c the f ’ y ' u._el. resume all my social and civil functions, and claim my darling as my blushing bride! . . julia. oh—then you haven’t heard? _ ern. my love, i heard nothing. how could i? there are no daily papers where i come from. . julia. why, ludwig challenged rudolph and won, and now he's grand duke, and he’s revived the law for another century! ern. what! but you’re not seri us—you’re only joking ! julia. my good sir, i’m a -light-hearted girl, but i don’t chaff bogies. em. well, that’s the meanest dodge i ever heard of! julia. shabby trick, i call it. ern. but you don’t mean to say that you’re going to cry oil‘! julia. i really can’t afford to wait until your time is up. you know, i’ve always set my face against long engagements. em. then defy the law and marry me now. we will fly to your native country, and i’ll play broken-english in london as you play broken-german here! julia. no. these legal technicalities cannot be defied. situated as you are, you have no power to make me your wife. at best you could only make me your widow. em. then be my widow--my little, dainty, winning, win- some widow! julia. now what would be the good of that? why, you goose ! i should marry again within a month! dunt.—eaeasr and julia, em. if the light of love’s lingering ember has faded in gloom, ' you cannot neglect, o remember, a voice from the tomb l that stern supernatural diction should act as a solemn restriction, although by a_ mere legal fiction a voice from the tomb! \iulia' (in affected terror). . " i own that that utterance chills me—- it withers my bloom ! with awful emotion it thrills me—- that voice from the tomb! oh, spectre, won’t anything lay thee? though pained to deny or gainsay thee, in this case i cannot obey thee, thou voice from the tomb ! dancin . so spectre appalling ( ) ’ i bid you good-d,ay— perhaps you’ll be calling when passing this way. the grand duke ; or, your bogeydom scorning, and all your love-lorning, i bid you good-morning, ' i bid you good-day. em. (furious). my oifer recalling, ' your words i obey-— your fate is appalling, and full of dismay. to pay for this scorning i give you fair warning i’ll haunt you each morning, each night, and each day ! [repeat ensemble, and exeunt in opposite directions. re-enter the wedding procession dancing. cnoiws. now bridegroom and bride let us toast in a magnum of merry champagne-- let us make of this moment the most, we may not be so lucky again. so drink to our sovereign host and his highly intelligent reign‘-— his health and his bride’s let us toast in a magnum of merry champagne ! [march .heard. lud. (rccit). why, who is this approaching, upon our joy encroaching ' ’ some rascal come a-poaching who's heard that wine we’re broaching? ' all, who may this be? who may this be? who is he? who is he ? who is he? enter herald. her. the prince of monte carlo, . from mediterranean water, has come here to bestow ’ . on you his beautiful daughter. they've paid off all they owe, as every statesman oughter—- that prince of monte carlo and his be-eutiful daughter! chorus. the prince of monte carlo, &c. her. the prince of monte carlo, who is so very partickler, has heard that you’re also ' for ceremony a stickler— –m- the statutory duel. therefore he lets you know . by word of mouth auric'lar- (that prince of monte carlo who is so very particklar)- chorus, the prince of monte carlo, &c, her. that prince of monte carlo, from mediterranean water, has come here to bestow on you his be-eutiful daughter ! lud. (recit.). his highness we know not—nor the locality in which is situate his principality; but, as he guesses by some odd fatality, this is the shop for cut and dried formality! let him appear- he'll find that we're remarkable for cut and dried formality. [reprise of march. exit herald. ludw g beckons his court. lud, i have a plan—i'll tell you all the plot of it— he wants formality—he shall have a lot of it! [whispers to them, through symphony. conceal yourselves, and when i give the cue, spring out on him—you all know what to do! [all conceal themselves behind the draperies that enclose the stage, pompous march. enter the prince and princess of monte carlo, attended by six theatrical-looking nobles and the court costumier. duet.—prince and princess. prince, we're rigged out in magnificent array (our own clothes are much gloomier) in costumes which we’ve hired by the day from a very well-known costumier. cost. (bowing). i am the well-known costumier. princess. with a brilliant staff a prince should make a show (it's a rule that never varies), so we've engaged from the theatre monaco six supernumeraries. nobles. we're the supernumeraries. {ll at a salary immense, quite regardless of expense, six supernumeraries ! hey do not speak, for they break our grammar's l; and their language is lamentable- . ld they never take off their gloves, because their nails are not presentable. our nails are not presentable ! the grand duke; or, princess. to account for their shortcomings manifest we explain, in a whisper bated, they are wealthy members of the brewing interest to the peerage elevated. nobles. to the peerage elevated. all. { lvgleegere } very, very rich, and accordingly, as sich, to the peerage elevated. prince. well, my dear, here we are at last—just in time to compel duke rudolph to fulfil the terms of his marriage contract. another hour and we should have been too late. princess. yes, papa, and if you hadn’t fortunately discovered a means of making an income by honest industry, we should never have got here at all. prince. very true. confined for the last two years within the precincts of my palace by an obdurate bootmaker who held a warrant for my arrest, i devoted my enforced leisure to a study of the doctrine of chances—main‘ly with the view of ascertaining whether there was the remotest chance of my ever going out for a walk again—and this led to the discovery of a singularly fascinating little round game which i have called roulette, and by which, in one sitting, i won no less than five thousand francs! my first act was to pay my bootmaker-—my second, to engage a good useful working set of second-hand nobles—and my third, i hurry you off to pfennig halbpfennig as fast as a train de lume could carry us! ‘ princess. yes, and a pretty job-lot of second-hand nobles you’ve scraped together! prince (doublfully). pretty, you think? humph! i don’t know. i shouldsay tol-lol, my love——only tol-lol. they are not wholly satisfactory. there is a certain air of unreality about them-—they are not convincing. cost. but, my goot friend, vhat can you expect for eighteen- pence a day! . prince. now take this peer, for instance. what the deuce do you call him? cost. him? oh, he's a swell—he’s the duke of riviera. prince. oh, he’s a duke, is he? well, that’s no reason why he should look so confoundedly haughty. (to noble.) be affable, sir! (noble takes attitude of aflfability.) that’s better. (passing_ to another.) now, who’s this with his moustache coming off? cost. why, you’re viscount mentonc, ain’t you? noble. blest if i know. (turning up sword belt.) it’s wrote here—yes, viscount mentone. aura‘ st}? rz/‘tony duel. cost. then vhy don’t you say so? ’o d' yerself up—you ain’t carryin’ sandwic_:l_ _ boards now. [adjusts his moustache. _ prince. now, once for all, you peers—when his highness arrives, don’t stand likesticks, but appear to take an intelligent and sympathetic interest in what is going on. you needn’t say anything, but let your gestures be in accordance with the spirit of the conversation. now take the word from me. afiability! (attitude). . ‘submission! (attitude). surprise! (attitude). shame! (attitude). grief! (attitude). joy! (attitude). that's better! ‘you can do it if you like! . princess. but, papa, where in the world is the court? there is positively no one here to receive us! i can’t help feeling that rudolph wants to get out of it because i’m poor. he’s a miserly little wretch—that’s what he is. ' _ prince. well, i shouldn’t go so fares to say that. i should rather describe him as an enthusiastic collector of coins—of the realm—and we must not be too hard u n a numismatist if he feels a certain disinclination to part wit some of his really very valuable specimens. it’s a_ pretty hobby : i’ve often thought i should like to collect some coins myself. princess. papa, i’m sure there’s some one behind that curtain. i saw it move! ‘ prince. then no doubt they are "coming. now mind, you. peers—haughty aliability combined with a sense of what is due to your exalted ranks, or i’ll fine you half a franc each—upon my soul, i will! [gone]. the curtains fl. back and the court are dis- covered. they give a wild yell and rush on to the stage dancing‘ wildly, with prisce, perscess, and nobles, ‘who are taken by surprise at first, but eventually join in a reckless dance. at the end all fall down emhausted. lud. there, what do you think of that? 'that’s our ofiicial ceremonial for the reception of visitors of the very highest distinction. ’ prince (puzzled). it’s very quaint—vory curious indeed. prettily footed, too. prettily footed. lud. would you like to see how we say “good-bye ” to visitors of distinction? that ceremony is also performed with the foot. prince. really, this tone—ah, but perhaps you have not completely grasped the situation ‘! lud. not altogether. ' prince. ah, then i'll give you a lead over. ( significantly.) i am the father of the princess of monte carlo. doesn’t that convey any idea to the grand ducal mind? the _gr. vd duke; or, ficance.) lud. (stolidly). nothing definite. prince (aside). h’m—very odd! never mind—try again! (aloud) this is the daughter of the prince of monte carlo. do you take? " lud. (still puzzled). no—not yet. go on—don’t give it up —i daresay it will come presently. prince. very odd—never mind-—try again. (with sly signi- twenty years ago ! little doddle doddle! two little doddle doddlesl happy father—hers and yours. proud mother-yours and hers! hah! now you take? i see you do! i see you do! ' lud. nothing is more annoying than to feel that you’re not equal to the intellectual pressure of the conversation. i wish he’d say something intelligible. prince. you didn’t expect me ? lud. (jumping at it.) n o, no. i grasp that—thank you very much. (shaking hands with him.) no, i did not expect you! prince. i thought not. but ha! ha! at last i have escaped from my enforced restraint. (general movement of alarm.) (t crowd who are stealing of.) n , no—you misunderstand me. i mean l’ve paid my debts ! all. oh! (they return.) princess (aflectionately). but, my darling, i’m afraid that even now you don't quite realize who i am! (embracing him.) baroness. why, you forward little hussy, how dare you? [takes her away from lvnwle. lud. you mustn’t do that, my dear—never in the presence of the grand duchess, i beg! princess (weeping). oh, papa, he’s got a grand duchess! lud. a. grand duchess ! my good girl, l’ve got three grand duchesses ! princess. well, i’m sure! respectable court. prince. all these grand dukes have their little fancies, my love. this potentate appears to be collecting wives. it’s a pretty hobby—i should like to collect a few myself. this (admiring baroxess) is a charming specimen—an antique, i should say—of the early merovingian period, if i’m not mis- taken ; and here’s another—a scotch lady, i think (alluding to julia), and (alluding to lisa) a little one thrown in. two half-quarterns and a makeweight! (t ludwig.) have you such a thing as a catalogue of the museum? ' princess, buti cannot permit rudolph to keep a museum lud. rudolph? get along with you, i’m not rudolph ! rudolph died yesterday! papa, let’s go away—this is not a . l‘ the statutory duel. prince and princess. what ! lud. quite suddenly—of—of a cardiac affection. prince and princess. of a cardiac affection? lud. yes, a pack-of-cardiac affection. he fought a statutory duel with me and lost, and i took over all his engagements— including this imperfectly preserved old lady, to whom he has been engaged for the last three weeks. princess. three weeks! but i’ve been engaged to him for the last twenty years! baroness, lisa, and julia. twenty years! prince (aside). it's all right, my love—they can't get over that. (aloud.) he's yours—take him, and hold him as tight as you can | princess. my own l (embracing ludw g.) lud. here's another!—the fourth in four-and-twenty hours! would anybody else like to marry me? you, ma'am—or you-- anybody! i’m getting used to it! baroness. but let me tell you, ma'am— julia. why, you impudent little hussy lisa. oh, here's another—here's another ! (weeping.) princess. poor ladies, i’m very sorry for you all ; but, you see, i’ve a prior claim. come, away we go—there's not a moment to be lost! chorus (as they dance towards exit). away to the wedding we'll go to summon the charioteers, though her rival's emotion may flow in the form of impetuous tears— - [at this moment rudolph, ernest, and notary appear. all kneel in astonishment. recitative. rud., ern., and not. forbear! this may not be frustrated are your plans ! with paramount decree the law forbids the banns ! all. the law forbids the banns! lud. not a bit of it! i've revived the law for another century ! rud. you didn’t revive it ! you couldn’t revive it! y. you are an impostor, sir—a tuppenny rogue, sir! y never were, and in all human probability never will duke of pfennig anything! all. what!!! the grand duke. rud. never—never, never! (aside.) oh, my internal economy! lud. 'l‘hat’s absurd, you know. i fought the grand duke. he drew a king, and idrew an ace. he perished in incon- ceivable agonies on the spot. now, as tha’- settled, we’ll go on with the wedding. _ rud. it—it isn’t settled. you—you can’t. i—i—(to n - tary) oh, tell him—tell him! i can’t! not. well, the fact is, there’s been a little mistake here. on reference to the act that regulates statutory duels, i find it i expressly laid down that ace shall count invariably as lowest! all. as lowest! rud. (breathlessly). as lowest—lowest—lowest! so you’re the ghoest—ghoest—ghoestl (aside) oh, what is the matter with me inside here ! ern. well, julia, as it seems that the law hasn’t been revived—and as, consequently, i shall come to life in about three minutes—(consulting his watch)- julia. my objection falls to the ground. (resignedlg/.) very well ! princess. and am i to understand that i was on the point of marrying a dead man without knowing it? (to rudolrh, who revives.) oh, my love, what a narrow escape i‘ve had! bud. oh —you are the princess of monte carlo, and you’ve turned up just in time! well, you’re an attractive little girl, you know, but you’re as poor as a rat! [they retire up together. lisa. that’s all very well, but what is to become of me? (to ludz"ig.% if you’re a dead m —' [clock strikes three. lud. but ’m not. 'i'ime’s up—the act has expired—i’ve come to life—the parson is still in attendance, and we’ll all be married directly. all. hurrah! finale» happy couples, lightly treading, castle chapel will be quite full ! each shall have a pretty wedding, as, of course, is only rightful, though the bride be fair or frightful. contradiction little dreading, this will be a day delightful—- each shall have : pretty wedding ! such a iretty, pretty wedding ! uch a pretty wedding ! [all dance of to get married as the curtain falls. his excellency. a comic opera. written by w. s. gilbert, composed by osmond carr. dramatis personae. the prince regent, disguised as nils egilsson, a strolling player, george griffenfeld, governor of elsinore, erling sykke, a young sculptor. dr. tortenssen, a young physician. mats munck, syndic of elsinore. corporal harold, of the king's hussars, a sentry. - - - - first officer. second officer. christina, a ballad singer. nanna ) thora § - dame hecla cortlandt, a lady of property. blanca, a vivandière, elsa, a peasant girl. griffenfeld's daughters. act i. market place of elsinore. act ii. courtyard of the castle, date– , his excellency, act i. scene.—market place of elsinore. the townspeople (led by mats munok, the syndic) are assembled to congratulute erling sykke on the completion of the statue of the prince regent of denmark, which occupies the centre of the stage. colours flying, bells ringing, cannon firing, and general symptoms of rejoicing. opening chorus. set the merry bunting flying, fire the cannon-ring the bells- our great townsman glorifying, who with sculptor's skill undying, all competitors excels. he, with his artistic spells, so the stubborn marble quells, that, to all intents elastic, it assumes, in manner plastic, shapes heroic-shapes fantastic, as his mighty will compels ! mats munck. chosen from his fellow creatures all. by our king—’twas wisely done— to perpetuate the features of the regent prince, his son— then created, by a penmark, . at our gracious king's decree, sculptor to the court of denmark and the royal familee ! sculptor to the court of denmark and the royal familee' leisure take—festina lente— you have time before you, plenty, when at only two-and-twenty, (nemine dissentiente) you're created with a penmark, sculptor to the court of denmark- sculptor to the court of denmark and the royal familee s exc_ellen_cy. and the glory of knightly yr-ide': no blemish, orfault, or flaw, but perfect in all is he, i’ve learnt, in fine, what a god divine a chivalrous knight may be. "as gentle as lover’s lay, or the dawn of a bright may-day, yet cast iu_the knightly mould of the glorious days of old- my eyes are opened ; at last i see what he who would win my heart must be: why look at the men we've known- their mouths will open and close- they’ve ears likewise, and a couple of eyes, and the usual nubbly nose ; each has a head of his own, they've bodies, and legs, and feet—- l’m bound to admit that in every whit — the catalogue’s quite complete :- but where is the godlike grace that lights that marvellous face? where the brow serene? where is the lordly mien? ah, dullards and dolts are all i’ve known, compared with that marvellous, matchless stone ! [emit cenistma. erl. that’s a typical instance of feminine rversity—doesn’t fall in love with me, which would be rationa enough, but with the senseless inanimate work of my hands! my dear fellow (addressing statue), i little thought, when i cut you out, that in course of time you’d return the compliment! enter tortenssen. tor. erling, congratulate me! i’ve just received my patent of appointment as personal physician to his majesty king christian. i have let my house, sold my practice, and i start for copenhagen this day week! ' erl. my dear friend,i’m overjoyed. i'm in daily expectation of a royal command to take up my office as sculptor extra- ordinary to the royal family-—and we’ll travel together. of course you’ve heard that ‘i’ve been promised a countship ? tor. and i am to be created a baron! erl. you don’t say so! to think that we two, who have toiled in obscurity from boyhood for a bare subsistence, should his excellezvcy. both be raised at the same moment to such social and pro» fessional distinction! tor. it seems incredible! it can’t be—but, no-—that’s out of the question. erl. what can’t be ‘. _ tor. it can’t be one of governor griffenfeld’s practical jokes ? erl. my dear fellow, don’t suggest such a thing. it would be too cruel—why, it would be our ruin! tor. but he is cruel. when a scheme for a practical joke enters his head he sticks at nothing in its accomplishment. why, he has caused the very soldiers of the garrison-war- worn veterans as they are—to be drilled as ballet-girls, and to perform all their evolutions to dance steps, simply in order to make them ridiculous in the eyes of the girls they’re engaged to! erl. he’s a malicious devil enough, but he would hardly venture to play pranks in the name of his sovereign. besides, there’s the statue—a commission from the king. tor. true. by the way, i suppose it is a commission froi the king? that’s not one of his excellency’s practical jokes ? ' erl. nonsense! now, does that look like a practical joke? why, i’m to get ten thousand rix-dollars for it! now, as you know, i love his daughter nanna devotedly, and she has hitherto treated me with contempt, because, as she says, i’m a mere tuppenny-halfpenny stone-cutter. of course, that’s only her humorous way of putting it. tor. and i adore 'l‘hora, who has always treated my pre- tensions with derision, because, as she says, i’m only a pitiful pill-roller. that’s her epigrammatic way of expressing it. erl. but now that our positions are so immensely improved, surely we might renew our proposals with every prospect of success! tor. the very idea that occurred to me ! my incomparable 'l‘hora—- erl. your what! _ tor. my incomparable thora-—— ‘ erl. ah—exactly! but—don’t think me inquisitive—why don’t you think n anna _incomparable ? tor. why, my dear fellow, if for no other reason, because you do. ' - erl. what an obstinate dog you must be to refuse to consider her the divinest creature in the world, because i do! _ and you call yourself my friend! ' tor. well, but really ' erl. it’s most unjust to the poor girl. . $ excelle./vcy. tor. but if i loved n anna you’d call me out. erl. what, you—call you out ? call out my old friend because he was of the same way of thinking as myself ?—nol tor. but suppose i were successful? erl. ah, but you wouldn’t be. that is a contingency that we need not consider. now do give up thora and love n anna —do, to oblige me. ' to/r. do you want everybody to love nauna? erl. of course i do. what i want is that all the world shall go mad over her, and that i shall be triumphant. surely that’s an intelligible position! now mark :— song.—erling. when i bestow my bosou ’s store, no room for doubt ' must i descry: all men must love whom i adore, or we fall out, all men and i. ' though poor their chance and slight their hope who with my suit presume to cope, ' yet must all men to gain her try, or we fall out, all men and i. when i am wed i’ll hold them cheap ivho sing and shout with joyous cry. at such a time all men must weep, or we fall out, all men and i. as all men must my rivals be, when nanna gives her hand to me all men must broken-hearted, sigh, or we fall out, all men and . if i my lady vainly woe, and, her without, i pine and die, mankind at large must perish, too, or we fall out, mankind and i. who lives when i find life too long would seem to say that i am wrong. when i expire all men must die, or we fall out, all men and i ! enter n anna and teona. nanna (pretending not to see ermmo and toutesssrm). and they’re so clever, said i—such talented young men—so extraordinarily good-looking, to —and so kind to their poor old mothers! v. h his excelleivcy. tnoea. and now that they’re going to be raised to the peerage they’ll have nothing to say to a couple of middle-class nobodies like us! (sud/ienly.) oh my goodness, here they are ! oh what have i said! duet.—nanna and thona. thom. oh my goodness, here’s the nobility! nanna. gracious me, how very embarrassing! thom. we’re such every day gentility—- bless me, how exceedingly harassing‘! nanna. prey, you pardon us ! don't be hard on us ! thom. most confusing your regard on us ! both. never was i so dazed, i think! into the ground i’d like to sink ! thom. can't you see they’re high society ? norma, don’t they sneer like people of quality? there. if we seem to lack propriety, pray forgive our silly frivolity ! nanna. treat with charity our vulgarity- thora. ’twixt us there's so much disparity both. very superior persons, you ! gracious goodness, what shall we do? erl. then, miss nanna, you’ve heard of our good fortune? nanna. indeed i have! i’m quite uncomfortable in the presence of such grandees! thom. we’re so unaccustomed to aristocratic circles that really we hardly know how we ought to address you! tor. oh, we haven’t been ennobled yet. thom. haven’t you really ? come, that makes conversation easier. still, a personal physician to the king—— nanna. and a sculptor extraordinary to the royal family— thera. and we’re only the daughters of an obscure provincial governor ! oh, really i think we’d better go. it’s so much wiser to keep to one’, own rank in life ! erl. miss nanna, pray be reassured ; we have no desire to presume on our promotion. indeed, you overrate our im- portance. thora. it seems impossible. i really think we’d better go. tor. no, don’t do that. be quite unembarrassed—entirely at your crse, and try to imagine that we are nobody in particular. thora. oh, but that demands a tremendous effort of the imagination. still, i’ll try (tries). tor. have you got it? them. not yet, but i won’t be beaten. i’ll try again (tries- again). . s excelle./vcy. ' nanna (trying). oh, i shall never do it! did you say nobody in particular ? . erl. just a couple of mere everyday, commonplace profes- sional men. nanna. well, it can’t be done——that’s all! it’s ridiculous . to expect it. _ erl. (aside). now’s my time, i think! (aloud.) miss n arms, as you know, we have both loved you" and your sister—- and we’ve often told you so, and you snubbed us, and we deserved it. but now that we are well off, and court personages, and going to be ennobled, we venture to-—to nanna. not to offer us your hands. n —don’t say that- don’t turn our heads and give us ideas above our station ! thom. oh! (crying out). oh, i’ve got an idea above my station! oh, it’s all the way up there, ever so high ! [pointing up. . the thers (looking up). where? where? thom. bal-loon ! ha! ha! ha! erl. i do believe you are laughing at us ! thom (to n anna). oh, aren’t the nobility shrewd ? nanna. and isn’t the aristocracy quick at grasping a situation ? thom. but come, we’ll be serious. are you really in earnest when you make us this intoxicating offer? tor. absolutely. erl. more serious than we ever were in our lives. lfianna. very good, that’s business, and i’ll tell you what we do. quar' ‘ett.—nanna, tirons, enuxo, and tontnessnu. nanna. if all is as you say— if honour and wealth and glory of every sort are your’s— thom. in short, ' if you’re not telling a story-— namza. if you are count some day- thora. a baron if you’re created— . and all turns out beyond all doubt precisely as you’ve stated—- nanna. court sculptor and a peer, with oversomuch a year, precisely as you’ve stated— thom. physician to the king with honours and everything, precisely as you've_stated— roo ' $ excellence nmma and thora. then i will be your brlde-- ez-l. and tor. oh joy! nanna and thora. and i your bride will be ! erl. and t z". then let us make merry. it’s evident, very, that day we soon shall see- nanna and t/lora. when you are qualified— ev-l. and tor. oh joy ! namla and thom. to marry you we agree ! erl. and t z". oh happy decision ! oh vision elysian ! that day we soon shall see! erl. compared with our own ' all others are iukiness ! tor. they are, alone, ' two visions of pinkiness ! erl. pinkiness, veiled with ivory pellicle— t z". everywhere hailed as simply angelica! ! nanna. that isn’t true, ridiculous chatterer ! thom. g along, do, unscrupulous flatterer ! nanna. only a sweet individuality ! thom. dainty and neat, but merely mortality ! erl. and tor. merely mortality? merely mortality? with such a bewitehing individuality? namm and thom. merely two pretty young ladies of quality, piquante and pleasant»—but merely mortality ! all. then{y§u } will be my bride—oh joy! ana{ ;o§°;§,} bride will be! . [dance and emeunt emma and toetenssrm. nanna. oh, thora! (la,ug ing.) thom. oh, nanna! (laughrk'ng.) nanna. they believe it all ! thom. every word! nan’na. what geese! thom. personal physician to the king! nanna. sculptor extraordinary to the royal family! thom. it serves them right for presuming to aspire to our affections. it was papa’s idea! oh, it’s a grand thing to have a father who will condescend to play practical jokes on the very meanest rather than allow the family dignity to be insulted. namza. dear papa! he has such humour! thom. so much invention! i his excellency. blan. it’s a little unkind to complain of our laughing at you, for you know we can’t help it—from to . elsa. we can none of us help it—you’re all so ridiculous! her. i think my betrothed wife might sympathize with the absurdity of my position. i think all our betrothed wives might sympathize with the absurdity of all our positions. elsa. we sympathize with you as hard as we can, after . we can’t do it before , because we’re laughing all the time. blan. from to you’re men, and we’re engaged to you. from to you’re hoppedegigs, and it’s off. elsa. that exactly describes it. her. yes, but at that rate we shall never get any forrarder. besides, who knows what may happen from to ? you might get engaged to somebody else—to the sergeant-major, for instance—he's always fooling around you. blan. well, of course we don’t want to waste our mornings; but even if i were engaged to him from to , i should always be true to you from to . herr. lt’s not enough. it’s incomplete. elsa. take care, the governor’z coming. har. oh, confound it—off we go again! . [soldiers resume dancing. enter governoe gurrrenreln. he has a pound of butter in his hand. grif. (to soldiers). ah, my fine fellows, still at it? got your second wind? that’s right—capital exercise! nothing like it. here, you can ezt this—i’ve done with it. (giving butter to harold.) the syndic went down like a shot! har. (dancing). i beg your excellency’s pardon, but-—may we halt for a moment? we’ve danced for nearly three miles up—hill, and it’s a hot day, and we’re feeling a little faint. grif. always craving for some unreasonable indulgence! selfish dogs, all of you! well, you may halt for five minutes. har. thank you very much. (to soldiers.) selfish dogs— halt! (they halt.) grif. anything else? har. well, i have a request to make. the fact is, the troops do feel the humiliation of being drilled like ballet-girls. grif. bless my heart, you surprise me! don’t they like ballet-girls ? har. oh, they’re very fond of ballet-girls, but they don’t want to be ballet-girls, because when you are a ballet-girl, you don’t seem to care so much about ballet-girls as you do when—when you’re something quite different. his excellency. grif. but don’t your men see how much amusement they create? can’t they see that all the girls are laughing at them? have they no sense of humour? har. oh, they’ve a distinct sense of humour; but to enjoy this sort of thing completely you want to see it from a distance. you see it from a distance, and it ought to be devilish funny; but we are close to it—in "fact, we are it—and when you are it, you don’t seem to "care so much about it, as you do when—when you are something quite different. the fact is, the point of a . joke is like the point of a needle—hold the needle sideways and it’s plain enough, but when it is directed straight at you—well, it’s not always very easy to see the point of it. grif. nonsense! i can see a joke plain enough even when i’m its victim. take my unfortunate love aflair— — har. ah, ridiculous business that! [soldiers laugh. grff. no comments, sir! har. (to soldiers). n comments, gentlemen! grif. take my unfortunate love affair. the late governor, when i was only his deputy, was about to be married to an elderly lady of a singularly explosive disposition. they simply doted on each other. n ow when you see two old donkeys simply doting on each other, your course is obvious—you set to work he.. to wheedle the old lady——- grif. away from the old gentleman. har. ha! ha! you little rogue! [llarold digs griffenfeld in the ribs. gri_'/'. don’t do that, sir! har. (to soldiers). don't do that, gentlemen! gri_'f. well, after some respectful attentions, she accepted in this letter (producing a letter) in which she stipulated that the matter should be kept a profound secret until an excuse could be found for sending the old gentleman about his business. but, as luck would have it, the governor died suddenly and fucceeded him, before i had time to explain that it was only my un—- har. and soldiers. ha! ha! (suddenly serious)—i beg your pardon—i don’t know what they’re laughing at. grif. and so there i was—regularly trapped into a ridiculous engagement, which i can’t for the life of me see my way out of. the situation is most unpleasant—most unpleasant. but do you suppose i don’t see the fun of it? why, i can’t think of it without going into convulsions! ha! ha! her. and soldiers. ha! ha! ha! (?ri_'}". she’s sixty! . his excelle/vcy. he-. and soldiers. ha! ha! ha! grif. wears a wig! he.. and soldiers. ha! ha! ha! ‘grif. don’t overdo it, sir! har. don’t overdo it, gentlemen ! gri/'. that’s quite enough. it’s a very good joke, but not as good a joke as all that. impudent puppies !e—be off with you. har. (to soldiers). lmpudent puppies l—inwards turn -- chassez ! [harold and soldiers dance of, followed by girls laugh- ing and chattering. grif. upon my word, there’s no such thing as gratitude. i do all i can to make my soldiers amusing—i place them in all kinds of ridiculous situations—i make them a source of enter- tainment to a whole township of attractive girls, and instead of being pleased and grateful for the attention, they growl like so many sore-eared bears! enter dame corrtlzmot skittishly, with a folded note in her hand. dame. why, here’s my little man after all! i’ve been looking for him everywhere. why does he hide himself away from his loving hecla? gri/'. eh? oh, it’s you, is it? neck.) don’t do that+you rumple me. there ? ' dame. it’s a note, you jealous boy! not for you—oh dear no! it’s a pretty little pink and white billet dome addressed to a pretty little pink and white gentleman, begging him to make an appointment to meet a pretty little pink and white lady, all alone! that’s me ! n ow what do you think of that? grif. well, if you ask me, don’t think he’ll come. dame. oh yes, he will ! he’ll come fast enough. there—it’s cruel to keep my pet in suspense—— grif. god bless me, you don’t suppose care whom you meet! dame (suddenly furious). what's that? once more ! come, out with it! grif. (alarmed). i say that i’ve such perfect confidence in your moral character that i don’t trouble myself to inquire whom you make appointments with. dame (relieved). oh, was that all ? but you shouldn’t upset me, george. within this fragile bod two tremendous powers are in perpetual antagonism— a diabolical temper and an iron (she puts her arm round his what have you get but say that again ! i his excellezvcy. grif (earnestly). two to one on the will ! two to one on the will! dame. wins easy, george! it’s all right again. go on, dear. gm:/'. no, but really now, what would you say if you found out, quite unexpectedly, that i wasn’t in earnest, and that i only proposed to you because—because somebody bet me i wouldn’t? dame (working herself up). bet you you wouldn’t—bet you you wouldn’t ! what would i do—what would i do- what would i do ? grff. now don’t go on like that! it’s most unpleasant. don’t think you know how creepy you are when you do that. oh, lord, she’s off again! duet.—govennon and dame conrlandr. dame. now what would i do if you proved untrue, and the suit you pressed were an idle jest, and the conjugal yoke a brainless joke, and if marry your darling you eouldn’t? grif. yes, what would you do if proved untrue,’ and if marry my darling i couldn't? dame. what would i say if you owned some day that, a wager to win, you had taken me in, and the fact disclosed that you just proposed because somebody bet you you wouldn’t ? gri/'. if i owned some day that i sung that lay, because somebody bet me i wouldn’t? dame. why, the trembling rock from an earthquake’s shock, and the ocean’s roar on the rock-bound shore, and the hell-babe’s scream were a peaceful dream, to the terrible broth of my brewing ; the tiger’s guash, and the cut-throat’s gash, and the foeman’s clash, and the thunder-crash of eternal smash were unmeaniug trash, compared with my hullaballooing ! ensemnle. govnrmoa (aszde) . dans. it might, perhaps, be rather rash take care, you’ll find it rather rash the truth upon her mind to flash my matrimonial hopes to dash, if an earthquakes shock were idle for an earthquake’s shock were trash idle trash compared with her hulla- compared with my hulla- ballooing ! ballooing ! dame. like grey screech— wl (that hideous fowl) in a midnight cowl i'd slink and prowl till a horrible howl and a tiger's growl had told the world i’d found you ! with object fell and a yelp and yell, on vengeance’ wing at my foe i’d spring, and " ace to face in a close embrace i'd wind my arms around you ! your heart ’d tear from its loathsome lair--i’d pluck out your e ‘es, and your tongue likewise—and limb from limb, with a grow ing grim, i'd rend him who pooh poohs me ! . his excellency. ‘ i (recovering herself.) excuse me, please—when people tease, by slow degrees i kick up a breeze which you can’t appease—it's quite . disense—i’ll go and lie down-—excuse me ! [emit dame corvtlandt. gri/'. this is getting a little too hot to be pleasant. but this letter to the syndic is simply providential. it’s exactly what i wanted to make my innocent little plot complete (tears it up). now where are those two girls of mine? they ought to be back by this time. (enter namu and thora.) oh, here you are! well, have you seen the syndic? nanna. yes, and we’ve carried out all your instructions. gri/i good girls. nanna. we told him that we had the best possible reason to know that the wealthy old lady was particularly well disposed towards him, and that a declaration from him would receive polite and immediate attention. thom. so the silly old gentleman went off his head with joy —did extraordinary things with the office-stool, and at once wrote his declaration, and gave to us to deliver (produces it). here it is. grif. thank you (giving her the letter which he formerly received from dame cortlandt). the old lady's reply. thom. what, already ? nanna. wonderful invention, steam ! grif. hush! (aside to them.) it’s the very letter in which she accepted me under seal of secrecy, when i was only deputy governor! nanna. oh, you sly old papal grif. ha! ha ha! it will do for him just as well as it did for me. and it will make him so happy! tnro.igmri-' ~znrni’n, nauru, and thorm. all. oh what a fund of joy jocund lies hid in harmless hoaxes! what keen enjoyment springs from cheap and simple things ! what deep delight from sources trite inventive humour coaxes, that pain and trouble brew for every one but you ! grif. gunpowder placed inside its waist improves mild huvanah, its unexpected flash bums eyebrows and moustache. nu n rm. when people dine no kind of wine beats ipocaciianlia, but common-sense suggests you keep it for your ghosts-— i ' his excelle/vc y. t/l ‘(l- then naught annoys the organ boys like throwing rod-hot _ coppers, _ ll/anna. and much amusement hides _ in common butter-slides : grgf. and stringy snares across the stairs cause unexpected croppers. t hora.. coal scuttles, recollect, produce the same efiect. grif. a man possessed of common-sense need not invest at great expense- namza. it does not call for pocket deep, t hora. these jokes are all extremely cheap. all. if you commence with eighteenpcnce—it's all you'll have to pay; you may command a pleasant and a most instructive day. grijl a good spring gun breeds endless fun, and makes men jump like rockets— t hora. and turnip-heads on posts make very decent ghosts. _ grif. then hornets sting like anything, when placed in waistcoat pockets-— narzna. burnt cork and walnut juice are not without their use. grif. no fun compares with easy chairs whose seats are stul¥ed with needles-— t hora. live shrimps their patience tax when put down people’s backs— grif. surprising, too, what one can do with a pint of fat black- beetles-— nanna. and treacle on . chair will make a quaker swear! thom. then sharp tin tacks and pocket squirts- gr_i/'. and cobbler's wax _ for ladies’ skirts— — nanrza. and slimy slugs on bedroom floors- grif. and water jugs on open doors- all. prepared with these cheap properties, amusing tricks to play, upon : . friend a man may spend a most delightful day! [emeunt. enter two fiicers, who look cautiously round. st '. is the coast clear ? nd ff. quite—there’s no one in sight. [first fiicer beckons ofl‘. enter the regent dressed ' picturesquely as a tattered vagabond, both oflicers bow deferenttally, ' his excellenc y. reg. who were those who left as you arrived ? st .. the governor griffenfeld, your royal highness, and his two daughters. reg. the fellow whose disgraceful practical jokes are the subject of such general complaint ? nd f. the same, sir. reg. well, the expostulations of the townspeople have reached us in shoals, and we are resolved to judge for ourselves as to their truth or falsehood. for the purpose of our present disguise, we are nils egilsson-—a strolling player—a vagabond—and as such you may describe me if any question as to my identity should arise. you can leave me now, but hold yourselves in readiness in case of emergency. lst of. as your royal highness pleases. [ fiicers bow and emeunt. reg. whom have we here? (looking at statue). oho!' my princely self, eh? upon my word, fairly good for a provincial town. in truth, a very public-spirited thing to have done. governor griffenfeld must have inspired this—upon my word, my heart softens towards the little scoundrel. but no—on second thoughts, he would have commissioned a caricature. (enter cnnistma with her guitar.) who is this? a dainty maiden indeed! chris. (not seeing him). it is a strange fascination that draws me hither! i have yet three principal streets, two squares, and the castle green to sing to—and they are all sure pay.—(puts down her guitar.) then how comes it that i find myself, every half hour, instinctively drifting towards the market-place. it is not market-day, and there’s nobody here except—(looking at statue) and if i sing to him he does not hear me, and if i talk to him i must needs talk for two. as thus: good -morrow, my lord. “ah, christina—hast thou. done well to-day? ” but indifferent well, my lord prince, for i have taken naught and given all! “that were idly done, christina. what hast thou given, and to,whom ? ” my heart, my lord prince, and to your highness, for lo k you, i love you passing well—even i-, who never loved a living man! “ some- what unmaidenly, this avowal—is it not, christina?” it may seem so, my lord. “thou shouldst have waited until i gave some sign.” i might have waited long, my lord, for your highness is strangely reticent; and i might have peaked, pined, dwindled, drooped, and died in the waiting. “that were pitiful indeed, christina.” i thank your lordship. will you hear a poor ballad, my lord? “if it be fairly sung, christina, and not_ too long.” it is not long, my lord, and i no his excellency. will sing it with all my poor skill, so it shall please you. “ well, tune up, christina—but i have no small change.” i thank your highness; i sing to you, not for your money, but for your love. ' ‘he song runneth thus ;—(sees regent, who comes forward, qgfering her the guitar) oh, sir! chris. ah! [looks at statue, then at regent, and shows signs of terror. reg. why, what is amiss with thee? chris. sir, i am frightened! i thought at first—but i am a silly fool! i ask your pardon; but—you are so strangely like the regent’s statue, that, for the moment, i— h, who are you? reg. i am nils egilsson-—a strolling player-a flotsam and jetsam on the world’s tide—tossed hither and thither as the wild waves will; but come good, come ill, always at the service of all pretty maids who need my offices. chris. then-—you are not a prince? reg. not a prince? oh, but i am a prince—very often! every prince in turn from nebuchadnezzar down to louis the sixteenth, when an engagement offers. a trifle out of repair just now, but even your theatrical princes have their vicissitudes, and elsinore is not stage-struck. but times may mend, and who knows but that i shall yet play hamlet on his native battlements ? _ chris. still, a real prince-— reg. is not to be envied, take my word for it. why, the very fact that he can’t show his nose out of doors without an everlasting accompaniment of national anthem is enough to make him turn revolutionist, and cry aloud for his own down- fall ! soec. .-regent. a king, though he's pestered with cares, though, no doubt, he can often trepan them ; but one comes in a shape he can never escape- the implacable national anthem ! though for quiet and rest he may yearn, it pursues him at every turn—- no chance of forsaking its rococo numbers ; they haunt him when waking-- they poison his slumbers ! like the banbury lady, whom every one knows, he's cursed with its music wherever he goes ! though its words but imperfectly rhyme, and the devil himself couldn't scan them, with composure polite he endures day and night that illiterate national anthem ! his excellency. it serves a good purpose i own : its strains are devout and impressive- ' its heartstirring notes raise a lump in our throats as we burn with devotion excessive : but the king, who's been bored by that song from his cradle-—each day—all day long- who’s heard it loud-shouted by throats operatic, and loyally spouted by courtiers emphatic- by soldier—by sailor—by drum and by fife—- small blame if he thinks it the plague of his life ! while his subjects sing loudly and long, their king—who would willingly ban the'.m— sits, worr disguising, anathematizing that hogie, the national anthem ! chris. it is pleasant to know that we are of kindred lot, for if you are a strolling player, why i am but a poor ballad-singer, and our callings have much in common. i am at my ease now, but at first—you will laugh at me, i know—i almost thought i was speaking to the regent himself l reg. i have been given to understand that there is a certain resemblance. chris. it is marvellous! do you know his highness, sir? [anaoiously. reg. well, i can scarcely say. we have never met, face to face. chris. (disappointed). then you do not know him. reg. very good—then i do not know him: but—i know his tailor. chris. his tailor? reg. yes. i frequently see his tailor, and his tailor tells me, in strictest confidence, that (impressively) his highness is at least three inches more round the waist than he is here represented to be! so be prepared for a disappointment! chris. (laughing). why, sir, i believe there is nothing in this wide world that concerns me less than the measure of his highness’s waist! such a trifle weighs but little with me. reg. (aside). it weighs a good deal with me! (aloud.) and do you pass much time in the society of his highness’s elfigy? chris. why, in truth, much more than is prudent. reg. oh, he won’t hurt you—i should say that you were quite safe with him. but beware of the regent himself, for men say that he is a terrible turk! chris. the regent, sir, is nought to me. yet, to speak truly, i am loth to believe that there can be aught but good in one whom that statue so strongly resemblesl his excelleivcy. reg. then—i may take it that you do not believe there is much of evil in me? ' chris. (confused). why, sir—in truth—nay, this is scarcely fair dealing. i spake not of yourself, but of the regent. reg. and i so strongly resemble him! chris. i think, sir, i will go. reg. nay, be not angry with me for drawing so pleasant a conclusion from premisses of your own making! (tenderly.) i would fain hope that you are not angry with me. chris. nay, sir, i am not angry. i spake foolishly, and i am well served. but i have tarried too long; i have to go to the castle green—i am to sing there. reg. why, i am likewise bound thither, for i have to see the governor. (tendcrly.) who knows but that we may meet again! chris. (moved). it is very like. (recovering herself.) but the day is speeding, and i have to sing for my supper. so fare you well, master ! reg. nils egilsson. (kissing her hdnd.) chris. (dreamily). nils egilsson: i shall not forget that name, be very sure! [emit cnnistina. reg. i/vell, as a bachelor heir-apparent, i've had a tolerably comprehensive experience of young ladies; but of all the maids i ever met, this is the fairest, the most winning, and the most original! what a refreshing experience! its like the breath of the hay-field after a season of hot ball-rooms ! we shall meet again, my pretty ballad-singer, unless i greatly err. and now to encounter this precious governor. . enter govereoa gnrrraereln. grrf. the syndic has received his charmer’s letter, and he’s on the tip-toe of expectation and delight. i shall get rid of her ——i shall get rid of her! reg. not knowing the lady, but speaking on general principles, i should say that you couldn’t do better. grrf. hallo, sir, who are you who presume to convert into a duologue that which was intended for a soliloquy ? reg. i’m nils egilss n—strolling player—sadjy out of repair, and greatly in need of a handsome salary, paid weekly in advance. gri/'. a professional rogue, eh? reg. well—a technical rogue—much as a lawyer is a technical gentleman—that is to say, by act of parliament. grzf. you pipe to a sharp note, sir. we keep a cage for ms excellence such gaol-birds as you. (aside-) where have i seen this fellow’s face ? reg. well, i think i sing best behind bars. grif. (aside). where have i seen this fell w’s face? reg. surely you’re not the governor? grif. yes, sir, i am the governor of this province. reg. a thousand pardons! i took you for the borough con- stable. a hasty conclusion based upon a commendable absence of that superficial polish which the vulgar are but too apt to associate with the conception of a gentleman. the governor! (bowing) a worshipfnl gentleman, i’ll be sworn, appearances notwithstanding. a thousand pardons! . grif. (who, during this speech, has been studying the rngf.nt’s face). i have it! it’s the statue! why, he’s marvellously like it! (aloud) hark ye, sirrah! you are an actor, you say ? reg. a poor actor. grif. ready at a moment’s notice to play any part that may be entrusted to you ? kings, princes, and so forth ? reg. why, i’m famous for my kings. there’-, an air of aristocratic impudenoe about me—you may have remarked it—- which is eminently suited to your monarchs of genteel comedy. my tyrants, too, are much admired. “ what, bearded to our face, and by a very boy? the moat is dry—load him with chains, and stifle him in its reeking mud! ha! ha! i will be obeyed l”. ' grif. yes—that’s not good, you know. rather amateurish, i should say. played a long engagement in the theatre royal back drawing room, i should imagine. by the way, have you ever heard it remarked that you bear a close resemblance to a very dignified personage ? reg. eh? oh, you mean the man who mends boots on the quay. that’s very_like y—he’s my aunt. grif. the man who mends fiddlesticks! reg. i don’t think i know him. gri/'. no, sir—not to the man who mends boots—to no less a person than the prince regent of denmark. reg. the prince regent? grif. there he is. he’s a common-looking fellow, and you are singularly like him. [pointing to statue. reg. you flatter me, i’m sure (looking at statue). well, some fellows have the deuce’s own luck. here is a man—the heir to a throne—caressed, courted, and flattered by the highest in the land—pampered with every luxurythat the ingenuity of the devil or man can devise—and, hang me ! if, in addition to iv. h _ his hixcellezvcy. all this, he isn’t exactly like me! it’s enough to turn the fellow’s head! grt_'f. he’s an ugly fellow, sir, and so are you. therein lies the chief resemblance. n ow attend to me. if you will consent to personate his highness for twenty-four hours, acting exactly as i shall prescribe to you, you shall have—well, you shall have five golden freidrichs ! reg. five golden freidrichs l grif. then you consent? reg. consent? what is there that i wouldn’t consent to for five golden freidrichs? but my dress—it’s a convenient outfit for summer weather; but not, i should say, what the regent of denmark would wear—except, perhaps, in the bosom of his family after the cares of state are over for the day. grtf. i've provided for that. the sculptor of that statue borrowed a left-off suit of the regent’s from his higbness’s valet-—for artistic purposes. it's now at the castle, packed up, ready to be returned. i should say it would fit you to a nicety. reg. (aside). i’ve not the least doubt of it. when am i to begin ? grif to-morrow morning. it'll be great fun! reg. it will be a tremendous joke. gm)‘. so original! with such possibilities! fancy—a sham regent dispensing sham wealth and sham honours untold on all my sham friends-—and then their disappointment when they discover that it’s only my fun ! reg. ha! ha! l’m longing to begin! [during the last few lines christina has entered. she listens, concealed behind statue. dust.—rngnr»zt and griffenfeld. reg. i've grasped your scheme, if i may say as much without in— trusion : as regent-prince i must ennoble all without exclusion, and scatter honours all around in liberal profusion— then you’ll step in and with_a word, dispel the fond illusion l g - '/. then l’ll ste in— reg. hen you'll step in-— grif. ’ and with a word-— reg. and with . word» then you’ll step in and, with a word, dispel the fond illusion l gz-if. (ercitedly). exactly so ! exactly so ! exactly so! exactly so! for understand what i require— give every man his heart’s desire, then lfll explain the ins and out—- in half an hour or thereabouts ! both. then { ygllllu } explain the ins and outs- in half an hour or thereabouts ! ais excellency, reg. g #. both, chris. reg. chris. he is t ensemble. oh, human joy at best is brief- alas, too soon it's turned to grief! so it's our duty, you'll allow, our fellow creatures to endow with happiness complete and vast— although that happiness may last— although that happiness may last- but half an hour or thereabouts | but half an hour- but half an hour— - but half an hour or thereabouts! [exit griffenfeld. (coming forward from behind statue). i overheard | you did? confusion | but not a word of this delusion- no single phrase- no faint suggestion- to haply raise a doubt or question | if fault or blunder visible i make in this experiment- control your muscles risible, and check untimely merriment. address me most respectfully- regard with silent shyness me- with eyes cast down subjectively;— and mind you “royal highness” me ! now don't forget—now don't forget, be sure you “royal highness” me! with all devotion beautiful, i'll favour your expedient- i'll be your very dutiful— i'll be your most obedient— you'll find me all docility, you miracle of slyness, you! i'll curtsey with humility, and always “royal highness” you! i won't forget—i won't forget— i'll always “royal highness” you! ensemble. oh, never was seen such a pearl of a prince, with { his } dignified mien my onvince: i am j. sure to con u his excellence in } gracious address here is royalty shown—- and a baby could guess ilifins the heir to a throne! ha! ha! ha! ha!»-ha! ha! ha! ha! oh it baby could guess he’s the heir to a throne ! [emit in opposite directions. " enter the syumc, with dams coetlandt’s letter in his hand. syn. it’s 'a singular thing, but i never yet proposed to a very unattractive old lady without being immediately accepted. now here is an unattractive old lady—abont to be married to no less a personage than the governor of this province, and i have only to beckon to her, and down comes the confiding old dove with no further thought about the governor, except to stipulate that her change of intention shall be kept a secret from him for the present! here comes the old dear, true to the appointment of her own making. how—how rich she looks, to be sure! enter dame contlazrnt. dame (bashfully). master munck—i—i ventured to send you a letter this morning. syn. a most delightful letter, and one that, believe me, i shall prize while i live! dame (surprised). you are vastly obliging! (aside) col- lecting autographs, i suppose. (aloud) n ow, you will under- stand that, for the reasons explained in my letter, i am most anxious that the subject of our conversation shall be kept a profound secret. syn. madam, i will be most careful. you—you are the discreetest little gipsy in denmark ! dame. sir! syn. quite right—can’t be too cautious, even between our- selves. i quite grasp the idea. dame (aside). he is singularly effusive for a confidential family lawyer! (aloud) i daresay that -you are aware that i am well to do. . syn. well, i certainly have heard that dame cortlandt is a lady of some means—but oh, she does her lover a grave injustice if she imagines that he allowed a mercenary considera- tion to influence him. . ' dame (surprised). why, of course i know that! syn. such a dainty, tight, trim, bewitching little rogue re- quires no—- _ . ' his excelleavcy, )ame (suddenly furious). eh? what's that? i’m a little rogue! this man presumes to tell me that i am a little rogue! syn. but, my dear lady- dame. don't speak—they're fighting it out—they're fighting it out! syn. bless my heart, how very interesting ! dame (having swallowed her anger—severely). it's all right, master munck, and, for the moment, the tempter is floored, but don’t try that again. perhaps—perhaps we had better discuss my affairs at another time—when you have slept it off, whatever it is. syn. no, don’t go—let me gaze a little longer on—(dame about to break out.) i didn’t say it! i didn’t say it ! i stopped in time! dame (aside). he's very eccentric for a confidential family lawyer ! (aloud.) i wish you to take instructions about the settlements on the occasion of—(bashfully) my forthcoming marriage. syn. my dear lady! [takes out note-book. dame. there are my two freehold farms, the three houses in dentheim, and twelve thousand rix dollars in government securities. i wish to settle all this, absolutely, on my dear husband. syn. what, all !!! dame. every penny. - syn. dearest! (dame about to break out again. syndic checks himself) i didn't say it! i didn't say it ! i thought it, but i didn’t say it! duet.—dame and syndic. dame, now all that we've agreed upon, o- and all that's passed between us- no human soul must know, be he a friend or foe. syn, you lean no broken reed upon, o- in courts of law and venus (i've practised much in both) i'm always on my oath ! dame. what always? sym. always | dame, always? sym. always! always on my oath ! you'll find i am discreetly dumb, so trust me, ma'am— dame. the word is mum-- i his excellence syn. of all i know i'll give no clue, you little ro— guey poguey, ybu ! you little roguey poguey! dame (indiymmtly). sir ! syn. you little roguey poguey ! dame. . sir! ! s /z . you roguey poguey, rogney poguey, roguey poguey ! dame. sir! ! ! ensnmnm. dame (aside) . svemc (aside). although of men's vulgarity, o—— if called upon in charity, oq i'm no unfair inquisitor, to justify my visitor, i hate familiarity, — i'll quote my popularity, - in a family solicitor! as a family solicitor. both. as a family, family, family, family—- a family solicitor ! dame, your tone is not professional, o— it's neither grave nor courtly‘: such lack of_common-sense inspires no confidence. syn. by gradual steps progressions], o—- i‘ll reach the haven shortly ; but till that moment sweet i'll never be indiscreet. dame. what never ‘? syn. never ! dame. never ? syn . ‘never ! never be indiscreet! (danciny.) those lips command, and i obey, thoulgh close at hand, he joyous day when i may sip their honey dew— you little pip— . sy wipsy you ! you little pipsy wipsy l dame. . sir ! syn. you little pipsy wipsy ! dame. sir ! ! syn. you pipsy wipsy, pipsy wipsy, pipsy wipsy ! dame. sir! ! ! his excellency. i esssmsuz. damn (aside). snmrc (aside). what sentiments transgressioual ! these gradual steps progressional, __ - . _. it's bad, i’ve understood, for wait any time i would for them, . them- when gentlemen professional, o— when gentlemen professional, -- take more than is quite good gain widows r ch, t’s good for for them ! them! both. when gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen, igentlemen— take more than is good for them . widows gain, it’s good for them ! [eaceunt separately . enter ebling sykke, with large unopened ofiicial letter in his hand. erl. at last—the reply to my letter announcing to his majesty the completion of the statue! every hope and every fear of my life lies within the four corners of this document. what may it not contain? perhaps an order on the king's treasurer for my ten thousand rix-dollars! perhaps my appointment as court sculptor! perhaps even my patent of countship! i tremble so that i can scarcely open it ! [nanna has entered at the back. she creeps up to him with suppressed fun in her face. nanna. oh, what a big letter! whom is it from, and what’s it all about ? ert. nanna, this letter is to seal your destiny and mine—so, as you are as much concerned with it as i am, i think we ought to open it together. it’s—it’s from the king’s private secretary! nanna. oh, do be quick and let’s see what’s in it ! erl. you open it—i can’t! (giving her the letter.) nanna. i can. now then—one! two! three! [nanna opens it. erl. read-—read ! nanna (looking at it). oh! i don’t think you’ll like it. oh ! i’m sure you won’t like it! (reads.) “ sir-— n reply to a letter in which you announce the completion of a statue of his royal highness prince frederick, alleged by you to have been com- missioned by his majesty, i have to inform you that his majesty knows nothing about it.” erl. (stunned). knows nothing about it ! i i/is excellency. nanna. there seems to be some mistake. erl. some mistake! why, what do you mean ? nanna. why that, at the first blush, it bears the appearance of being one of dear papa’s practical jokes. erl. but it’s ruin ! absolute ruin ! why, i spent every penny i possessed on the marble alone! nanna. i’m so sorry! erl. sorry! i can’t realize it! it stuns me! it’s too cruel— too cruel! and the promise you made e? nanna. oh, the promise! ye — es — the conditional promise. erl. don’t tell me that was a hoax too! give me some hope to cling to! i can bear it all if you’ll only tell me that you won't discard me ! nanna. really, it’s extremely awkward; but one must be a little prudent. ’m a very expensive young lady, and as it seems that you have no immediate prospect of being able to maintain an establishment, it would be really criminal on my part to involve you in further embarrassments. [erling sinks helplessly on pedestal of statue, and buries his head in his hands. . soxe. —nanna. my wedded life must every pleasure bring on scale extensive !— if i’m your wife i must have everything that’s most expensive-- a nd ’s maid- ( y hair alone to do i am not able)- and i’m afraid i’ve been accustomed to a first-rate table. these things one must consider when one marries- and everything i wear must come from paris ! oh, think of that ! oh, think of that! i can’t wear anything that’s not from paris! from top to toes quite frenchified i am, if you examine. and then—who knows ?— perhaps some day a fam- perhaps a famine ! my argumentfs correct, if you examine, what should we do, if there should come a f-famine ! his excelleivcy. though in green pea yourself you needn’t stin in july sunny, ' in januaree it really costs a mi‘ti a mint of money ! no lamb for us- house lamb at christmas sells at prices handsome : asparagus, in winter, parallels a monarch‘s ransom. when purse to bread and butter barely reaches, what is your wife to do for hot-house peaches? . ah ! tell me that! ah ! tell me that ! what is your wife to do for hot-house peaches ? your heart and hand though at my feet you lay, all others scoruing ! .as matters stand, there’s nothing else to say except—g d morning ! though virtue be a husband’s best adorning, that won’t pay rates and taxes—so, good morning ! [emit nanna. erl. cruel, cold calculating girl! what on earth am i to do? ruin and desolation stare me in the face! enter toetenssen in great emcitement, with an open letter oi his hand. tor. erling! i am tricked, swindled, undone! i have just received a letter from the king’s secretary to say that my appointment is a hoax! i’ve sold my local practice, let my house, and thora repudiates me with indignation and con- tempt! erl. again the governor's doing! i, also, have just learnt that the commission for the regent’s statue is a heartless fabrication, and i, too, am ruined—utterly and completely ruined! tor. my poor erling! erl. but this is no time for idle regrets. a term must be put to this scoundrel’s practices. “to will call the people together, tell them of the infamous trick that has been played upon us, and then away to copenhagen to lay the whole matter before the regent himself! tor.. we will, we will! i azs excellaavcy. finale. erl, and tor, come hither, every one, come hither, all ! let every mother's son obey our call! come hither in your might, in stern parade, and learn the deadly slight upon you played ! during this the chorus, christina, harold, and blanca have all. entered. why, who the deuce has dared to play a trick, at elsinore, to-day? come, tell us quick, this scurvy trick, why, who the deuce has dared to play? erl. (passionately). that statue—who commissioned it? all. the king ! erl, and on that spot positioned it? all, the king! court sculptor who created me, and told me rank awaited me, which pleased you and elated me? all. the king! tor, (furiously). who raised me from obscurity? all. the king ! tor. and gilded my futurity? all. the king! tor. physician who appointed me? with baron's rank anointed me, till foolish pride disjointed me? all. the king! the king he did and said it all, he did this noble thing ! give him the fame and credit all, his majesty the king! god save the king ! hurrah! erl, a lie! no monarch honoured you by honouring us, or for that cursed statue gave commission; no monarch with perception generous, appointed tortenssen his court physician | no royal sunlight on on - shone- you have been chea: layed upon | all. we have been c. layed upon? who is th: for trifling! with cle, tling ! * - - –mm - am/s a.xca lleavcy. enter dame cortlandt in a towering rage, followed by syndic, who tries in vain to appease her. dame, the truth's revealed, the mystery dispelled— the culprit is—the governor griffenfeld ! he doesn't confine to lowly folks his base barbarian dealings, but dares to play his practical jokes upon my tenderest feelings! assuming that for you i glowed (to syndic), you syndical mountebank, you! he—(symptoms of an approaching outbreak). all. pray be careful or you'll explode ! dame (with an effort). i'm keeping it under, thank you! all. hurrah! hurrah ! hurrah! hurrah! she's keeping it under! thank you! dame, henceforth i vow, with hate intense, to crush that governor pagan | whatever the cost, at my expense, we'll go to copenhagen. there to the regent we'll complain, in volleys of vocal thunder– [further symptoms of an outbreak. all. now steady, or you'll be off again! dame (with an effort). all right, i'm keeping it under ! l, brava ! brava ! brava ! brava ! dame cortlandt's keeping it under ! enter griffenfeld, nanna, and thora, all, ah! here's the monkey undiscerning, who, all thought of mercy spurning, dares with men of light and learning thus to play the pranksome fool! launch at him our loudest thunder— tear him limb from limb asunder ! long enough we've suffered under his detested monkey-rule ! grif. what means this uproar which my comfort shatters! explain, i beg! are ye march hares, or hatters? dame, no madmen we—but matters not to mince, to copenhagen we depart, with rage and fury in each heart, to interview our sovereign regent-prince | grif. the regent? all. aye, the regent grif. not so loud. be pacified, i beg, excited crowd: this state of indignation do not foment- the regent's here, in elsinore, at this moment all. the regent here! grif, nanna, and thora. in elsinore at this moment i i his excellezvc y. trl .—governor, nmua, and taona. after a travellin troublesome, quit of the ourt and the quality-— weary of bobbery bubblesome— weary of party and polity, full of a jolly jocosity, ' out of the pale of propriety- hating the pride of pompo'sity— sick of that sort of society, regent is resting his brain here is our little domain ! (repeat) seeking a time of tranquillity, free from all fear of formality, finds it in jolly gentility here in this lovely locality-— dofling all duty and dignity (follies that fidget him fearfully), vows that our merry malignity favours his chirrupping cheerfully-— vows he'll again and again visit our little domain ! (repeat) all. seeking a time of tranquillity, etc. [griffenfeld, nanru, and tnoea dancing through this. chorus. this is our chance to explain- tell of our sorrow and pain! snxtnt. enlrzm, tonrausssu, syndic, hanol >, christina, and dame contlaunt. har. this is our opportunity-— it may not come again. gri/'., nanna, and thom (in aflected terror). no, no ! er. to lay bare with impunity our misery and pain. gri_'f., nanna, and thora (in afected terror). no, no ! tort. we’ll beg, with due severity, his speedy punishment. gri/'., nanna, and t hora (in afected terror). no, no ! the sir. and that with all celerity to gaol he might be sent! grifi, nanna, and thom (in afected terror). no, no ! no, no ! not that; avert our doom ! why it would be our ruin ! can you resist when we assume this attitude to sue in. ( kne¢'li'r_q—rep¢¢ll-) all. yes, yes! . ha, ha! yes, yes! ha, ha ! we can resist though you assume that attitude to sue in l azs excelleavc p. i laughing derisively at griffenfeld and daughters. ha, ha! ha, ha! ha, ha! ha, ha! grif. and daughters (as if crying). ho, ho! ho, ho! &c. grif. oh, pray have mercy! do not pour w' a hapless governor, ho trades a rather devious path, the vials of your mighty wrath! nanna and thora. oh, pray you be magnanimous, 'twill ruin him and ruin us— in sheer good humour it was done— oh, haven't you any sense of fun? oh, haven't you any sense of fun? oh, haven't you any sense of fun? (pretending to cry.) ah, don't be hard on one whose passion ruling was, from his birth, a taste for april fooling! ah, don't be hard, &c. go, traitress, go! of such a foe i scorn the vain appeal. with rage i fume ! your father's doom this day the prince shall seal. in vain you cry, and sob and sigh, in vain you kneel, i say! oh, pity me, pity me, pity me, pity me, pity me, pity me, pray ! of all that's mean and vile, i ween, in an underhand way, epitome-pitome-pitome-pitome-pitome-pitome they ! all three. thora. all three. erl. and tor, grif, : and thora. chorus. ensemble. - all (except griffenfeld, nanna, and thora). shall we endure this outrage, say ? - are we but toys to serve his whim p is he on heartstrings thus to play, as may, perchance, seem good to him ? all. to the regent, away! grif., nanna, } and thora. all. to the regent, away ! grif., nanna, and thora. } griffenfeld, nanna, and thora (aside). when a governor triumphs through quibble and quiddity, he may employ with a cheerful avidity, any amount of tol-lol-the-rol liddity, tol-the-rol, lol-the-rol, lol-the- rol-lay. tol-the-rol-the-rol-lay! tol-the-rol-the-rol-lay! his excelle./vcy.‘ all. to the regent-—the regent—the regent, away ! q; tol-the-rol-the-rol, -the-rol, lol-the-rol-lay! [all rush of furiously, emcept cneistina, who remains laughing up stage, and gerrrenreln, nanna, and thoea, who sink, emhausted with laughter, on seat at foot of statue. act ii. scens.—the castle court-yard. erlino, toeteesssn, syndi . damn cortlandt, cneisrma, and chorus of men and girls discovered. a sentry is mounting guard on the castle gate. orening cnonus. with anger stern and fierce determination, we wait to learn . the fate of our appeal. . - to r ent just e’ve given information, and this, we trust, the tyrant’s doom will seal. erl. this mite of a man who’ll plot and plan to ruin us all for his delight-— tor. the mannikin ape in human shape-— dame. this tuppenny ha’penny lump of spite ! all. _ this tuppenny ha’penny, tuppenny hafpenny, tuppenny ha’penny lump of spite ! ceeistrna comes forward. recit.—christina. be eomforted—his downfall i foresee, all who exceed_the bounds of strict simplicity, and, yielding to a taste for eccentricity, fly in the face of orthodox morality, must dearly pay for their originality- you know the story of the wilful bee ? all (furiously). we don’t ! we never heard it! etl who was he his excellezvcy. i soeo.-—currstnm. (guitar accompaniment.) a hive of bees, as i’ve heard say, said to their queen one sultry day- “ please, your majesty’s high position, the hive is full and the weather is warm. we rather think, with a due submission, the time has come when we ought to swarm?” buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz. outspake their queen, and thus spake she- “ this is a matter that rests with me, who dares opinions thus to form ? ]’ll tell you when it is time to swarm! ” buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz. her majesty wore an angry frown, in fact her majesty’s foot was down- her majesty sulked_declined to sup- in short her majesty's back was up. buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, her foot was down and her back was up ! that hive contained one obstinate bee (his name was peter), and thus spake he— “ though every bee has shown white feather, to bow to fashion i am not prone- why should a hive swarm all together? surely a bee can swarm alone? ” buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, upside down and inside out, backwards forwards round about, twirling here and twisting there, topsy turvily everywhere- buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz. pitiful sight it was to see respeetable elderly high-class bee, who kicked the beam at sixteen stone, trying his best to swarm alone ! buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, trying his best to swarm alone ! the hive were shocked to see their chum (a strict teetotaller) teetotum— the queen exclaimed, “ how terrible, very ! it's perfectly clear to al the throng peter’s been at the old brown sherry. old brown sherry is much too strong-— buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz. of all who thus themselves degrade a stern example must be made, to coventry go, you tipsy bee ! ” so off to coventr town went he. buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz. his excelle./vcy. there, classed with all who misbehave, both plausible rogue and noisome knavc, in dismal dumps he lived to own the folly of trying to swarm alone ! buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz. all came of trying to swarm alone. chorus. all came of trying to, &c. enter mats muses from castle. all. well, well—what news ? does he refuse our rightful dues ? what news—what news ? lllats. good news ! the regent, whom we all revere, will read your neatly drawn appeal—- (i drew it !) without an hour’s delay he‘ll meet you here, and if we prove our case the governor'll rue it ! all. hurrah ! mats. if these our charges home we bring, he swears the governor's neck he'll wring ; and when he says he’ll do a thing, he'll do it! all. hurrah ! the sorrows that damped our lives are past, and happily all will end at last. as soon as the audience has been held, good-bye to the governor griffenfeld ! .men. good-bye ! girls. good-byc ! men. good-bye ! girls. good-bye ! all. good-bye to the governor griffenfeld ! enter n anna and ti-iora. they come forward humbly. e'rl. and tort. (recit.). ah, false one! tlzora. with humbled head—in desperation dire— i tidings bring from ‘my repentant sire. he much regretshis foolish whim- nanna. and hopes you’ll intercede for him ; for, though his gore at retractation rises, he’s very sorry-—and apologizes, thom. he can't say more—- both. hc’s very sorry—and apologizes ! . erl. and be comforted—i can’t resist that tear ! tor. . at once i’ll seek our sovereign prince’s ear, ' and tell him-—though our future you destroy it- i don’t mind ruination——i enjoy it! his excellency. i enter griffenfeld from castle. grif. (humbly). complying with the popular request, so prettily expresscd— syn. (aside). i drew it! grif. the regent comes»—forgive our little p ot- our enitence, do not ooh pooh it ! namuz. if still to press your grievance you agree, then i feel certain we shall rue it ! t hora. so please withdraw, as we are penitenl‘, that well-worn document. syn. (aside). i drew it! all. no, no ; no mercy will we show- away with you! you plead in vain ! n word of ours shall stop the blow ; your prayer we will not entertain ! flourish. enter regent. principals and chorus. hail, o regent prince. coming to requite us ! matters not to mince, you will nobly right us. your disgust evince— make the tyrant wince— — hail, o sovereign prince, whose decrees delight us ! racrr. —re a ~"r. i’ve read your dutiful memorial : if any other for reprisals call, or, suffering grievance, wish me to abate it, this is your opportunity to state it. . har. (recit.). may it please your highness ! _ am. hm‘. though we're eager for to sally ' the doughty field of mars-— soldiers. may it please your royal highness! har. and encounter, generally, any quantity of scars- soldiers. may it please your royal highness! har. yet for mischief, principally, he has turned us into ballet, and we feel it personally— it is rough on brave hussars ! req. yes, it’s rou h on brave hussars ! all. yes, you’re right, your oyal highness, it is rough on brave hussarsl har. if we urge, in accents courtly, that it wounds our proper pride-— soldiers. may it please your royal highness ! v. k . ‘ excelle./vcy. har. why, he answers as retortly, and for mutiny we’re tried— soldiers. may it please your royal highness ! ' har. we are soldiers grave and portly, and it aggravates us mort'lly, for, to put the matter shortly, well, it is not dignified ! all. no, it isn't dignified! reg. n , it isn‘t dignified ! all. look at this, your royal highness—it is far from dignified ! ballet or hussaas.. song.—rl£gen'l‘_. my people, who’ve submitted to the governor's absurdities, i sympathize most heartily with every word you say ; his ‘excellency‘s conduct is too bad—upon my word it is— but all his wrong .l'll rectify without undue delay. on erling, who has sufiered from his mischievous malignity, we shed the sunny summer of our sovereign benignity, and ratify all promises of dollars and of dignity. so consequently nanna will be his this very clay. all. so consequently nanna will be his this very day. lissssrnla. regent (aside to gran). gun‘. (aside to regent). erling (aside). oh, nanna will be your orders i am try- my orders you i -r— mine this very ing to obey, plicitly obey, day, ihope i don't exceed proceed with perfect and all my sorrows in any way ; certainty you hide themselves for so nobly you may; _ away; array me, now unmcrcifully for the trick he so magnificently flay me, dared to play me, pay me, and with punish- it will handsomely that your orders i am anxious to obey. nanna (aside). it's fortunate that this is all in play. ' i shouldn’t like to marry him to- dal’ . . it would terrible dismay be, if he really came to claim me, it is lucky that’s it’s only said in play. ment dismay me, or my orders you will if miss nanna will be surely disobey. repay me, mine this very day. thora, other principals. and chorus. oh, nanna will be his this very day, ‘ and all his sorrows hide them- selves away ; . i will handsomely array me in my very best to play me, for miss nanua will be his this very day !_ ‘ his excellezvcy. i you, tortenssen,—whom griffenfeld with impudent audacity appointed our physician—why, that gift is ratified with promised rank of baron—in that dignified capacity he‘s warranted in claiming pretty thora as his bride. and harold, gallant corporal, whom with a spite oppressional, was made to twist and turn about like ballet-girl professional, dispensing with the many" intermediate steps progressioual, a colonel he’s created at one mighty giant stride ! all. a colonel he's created at one mighty giant stride. eusnmnle. regent (aside to gnu-‘. (aside to hanoln and ton- gn rx). raoeut). tnussnu. i trust your excel- so far, my excel- upon my word, i'm lency’s satisfied, ency’s satisfied, truly gratified, to carry out your to carry out my to justify your choice wishes i have wishes you have will be my pride; tried-— . tried; for i think you’ve if i haven’t acted when you fail to chosen rightly, right! do it rightly and i thank you you wil mention it i will mention it most politely, politely, politely, for, upon my word, but i trust your ex' but, so far, my excel- ‘ i’m truly grati- cel ency’s satis- lency’s satisfied. fied. fied. tl-iora (aside). other principals and chorus. if he thinks that i intend to be his upon my word, we’re truly grati- bride, fied, he’ll find itamistake unqualified, to justify your choice will be if i know my feelings rightly, their pride; i will thank him most politel , for we think you’ve chosen and decline, on any terms, to e rightly, his bride. and we thank you most politely, ‘ for, upon my word, we’re truly gratified. and now for governor grifien£eld—we highly to extol you meant, but, finding you’re addictedto discreditablc pranks, we strip you of your dignity, position, and emolument, and name mats munck as governor—we don’t want any thanks. and, as in these proceedings we are handec all in unity, i think we couldn't find a more‘convenient opportunity of proving that imposture can’t be practised with impunity. ( to griffenfeld..) for all your impositions you’re degraded to the ranks !_ all. for all his impositions he’s degraded to the ranks ! i his excelle./vcy. eivsrmnle. rnc. (aside to gain). gnu‘. (aside to reg.). syndic. i think i have done you've done it pretty now really this is like exactly as you nearly as i’ve said, to turn my head, said, if you hadn’t you’d for i’m to rule as i am sure i hope i have sacrificed governorinstead! haven’t been mis- your head. _ when i get my led; you shall now re- quartefspayment, when i receive my ceive your pay- l’ll buy all his left- payments, ment, ofl raiment, i’ll surrender allthis so take oil’. that and it’s possible dame raiment, handsome rai- cortlandt i may and resume my old ment, wed. habiliments in— and resume your old stead. habiliments in- stead. nanna and tnona (aside to cnonus, and other principals. each other). assuredly there's nothing to be did you hear what that audacious said, fellow said? he's lucky in escaping with his my goodness, how exceedingly head ! ill-bred ! he loses all his payment, let us give the man his pay- and his most expensive rai- ment, ment, then he’ll doif his splendid and he'll take his turn at sentry- raiment, go instead ! and resume his own habiliments instead. reg. n ow all you men and maidens true, who troth have duly plighted— (i understand you’re not a few) your wrongs shall all be righted : at his expense a banquet to you’re cordially invited. and in the castle chapel you this day shall be united ! all. hurrah ! (all dancing) oh, bright delight—go, find a priest ! the wedding and the wedding feast, at your expense, will soon be held— so thank you, private grifienield ! ha, ha, ha, ha, etc. at your expense they will be held, three cheers for private grifienfeld! all. so thank you- gri . thank you— al . thank you- grifl". thank you- all. thank you, private griffenfeld ! [all dance of in couples, eaceptge ffenfeld and regent. his excellency. reg. (changing his manner—very humbly). i trust l’ve fairly carried out your excollency’s instructions ? g'n_'f. you’ve done pretty well, sir— nly pretty well! reg. may i ask in what respect i have failed? grif your manner is not sutficiently dignified for a royal prince—you want a great deal more of this sort of thing- (business) —you are not at all royal, sir ! reg. i see what you mean. (imitating him.) thank you, i’m sure—it will be most useful to me in my profession, and i’ll take care to remember it. but pray bear in mind that, as a poor stroller, i have not enjoyed your excellency’s many opportunitiesof making myself acquainted with the deportment of the very highest classes. grif true, but i told you this afternoon that you must endeavour t' assume an air of-—of this sort of thing‘—(business). then again, your instructions were to order me to be shot in twenty-four hours. why didn’t you do that? reg. well, i was about to give the order, but when i saw the temper of the people and how cordially you are detested— most unjustly, i’m sure—i was afraid to do so lest, in their fury, they should execute the order on the spot. gn'f. i see what you mean. reg. i might not have had time to stop them. gr?/‘. very true. reg. but it's not too iate—they can be sent for directly and the order given, without delay. (about to go of.) gm:/'. no—on second thoughts it’s not necessary. it will do as it is. reg. i trust you think i exercised a wise discretion ? grtf/'. well, on the whole, perhaps yes, i say-—it’s—it’s a good joke, isn’t it? reg. it’s a perfect monument of practical humour. only— forgive the suggestion—isn’t it a little risky? gm/'. risky? what do you mean? reg. somehow these practical jokes have such a tendency to recoil on the heads of their perpetrators. now, mere verbal humour is so‘ much safer—a quip, a crank, a jibe, jape or ‘est? j grif. nonsense, sir, don’t talk to me about japes and jests! return to the castle, and when you’ve resumed your rags, i will pay you the golden freidrichs i promised you. be off! reg. as your excellency pleases. [emit regsut into castle. gm]. what does he mean about practical jokes recoiling on their-perpetrator? i ought to know. i’ve played them with i h excelle./vcy. impunity for five-and-forty years! it’s all very. well to talk about verbal humour, but where is it to come from? why, everything of the kind has been said—t'here’s absolutely nothing left! sosa. -gltil<‘fenfeld. quixotic is his enterprise, and hopeless his adventure is, who seeks for jocularities that haven't yet been said. the world has joked incessantly for over fifty centuries, and every joke that’s possible has long ago been made. i started as a humourist with lots of mental fizziness, but humour is a drug which it’s the fashion to abuse ; .for'my stock in trade, my fixtures, and the goodwill of the business no reasonable offer i am likely to refuse. and if anybody choose . he may circulate the news ' ‘ that no reasonable offer i am likely to refuse. oh happy was that humourist-—the first that made a pan at all- who when a joke occurred to him, however poor and mean, was absolutely certain that it never had been done at . -- 'how popular at dinners must that humourist have been ! oh the daysiwhcn some stepfather for the query held a handle out, the door-mat from the scraper, is it distant very far? . ' and when no one knew where moses was when aaron. put the candle out, _ . " and no one had discovered that a door could be a-jar! but your modem hearers are in their tastes particular, and they sneer if you inform them that a door can be a-jar! in search of quip and quiddity l‘ve sat all day, alone, apart— and all that i could hit on as a problem was--to find analogy between a scrag of mutton and a bony-part, which ofiers slight employment to the speculative mind: for von cannot call it very good, however great your charity— ._ it'z not the sort of humour that is greeted with a shout-—_ and i've come to the conclusion that the mine of joculurity, ln present anno domini, is worked completely out! though the notion you may scout, i can prove beyond a doubt that the mine of jocularity is utterly worked out ! [emit into castle. enter harold (zl tll dre-.ed as colonel) followed by blanca. har. now, don’t worry me--i can’t attend to you now. i’ve the responsibility of a regiment on my shoulders, and i’ve no time to listen to ‘chatterboxes. if you’ve anything to say, mention it to the sergeant-major. ’ _ blan. the sergeant-major? oh, very good—only if i tell azs excelleavcy. blan. (confidentially to audience). the regent was weak in the head | jhar. she, taking the facts at a glance, to his bosom unblushingly flew— blan. and he was so deeply in love, i declare. - that he married her then, and he married her there- both. so it ends with a wedding at hanover square, as a three volume novel should do! [exeunt together. enter mats munck, now dressed in griffenfeld's uniform. mats. when a man is promoted unexpectedly to a position of the highest official distinction, it is always a satisfactory circumstance when his figure is calculated to set off his uniform to advantage. (sentry presents arms to him.) eh? oh, thank you very much. you're extremely polite, i'm sure! sent. please to remember the sentry. mats. eh? oh, certainly ! [gives him money. enter dame cortlandt unobserved. she comes forward. dame c. (putting her arm round him). mats! little man | mats. eh? oh, it's you. don't. i'm busy now. (aside.) it was all very well when i was only a syndic, but as a governor i can look a good deal higher than this sort of person. (aloud, to sentry.) will you kindly do that again? sent. certainly. [presents arms. mats. most gratifying, i’m sure! (tips him again. dame again embraces mats.) now, don’t worry—can't you see that i have business with a gentleman? [reverts to sentry. dame c. (suppressing her rage with difficulty). mats! take care! this is strange treatment—at the very outset of our engagement! * but, my good soul, you speak of our engagement as – dame c. don't deny it, mats. i have your letter of proposal in my pocket-you have my letter of acceptance in yours! i'm trying to keep it down, mats. mats. but as you very properly observed, that wasn't addressed to me but to the ex-governor. dame c. it does just as we' or you, mats. i accepted the governor, and you are the . mats. if it comes to were proposed to by the syndic, and i’m not the synd- d the syndic-go seek, go find– there's a good girl to sentry.) will you oblige me once more? [giving him money. his excellency. i dame c. (heaving with suppressed rage). i'm doing my best to subdue it, mats, but it’s a"tremendous effort. mats. hold your breath and count six, my dear. dame c. (does so). it’s all right, dear—it’s down again! mats. (occupied with sentry). so glad! dame c. we must settle this at once, mats. it’’ a very nice point. shall we refer it to arbitration? ’ mats. by all means. i find this gentleman (indicating sentry) full of delicate appreciation—supp se we leave it to him? dame o. you will undertake to abide by the result, mats? ' mats. with pleasure. (aside) i’ve tipped him till he doesn’t know whether he stands on his head or his heels! . quartet. ma'rs muuck, dame com-lasrrr, snxrrw, and afterwiu-ds gnrrmmrnln. mats (to sentry). one day, the syndic of this town (whose time of life is shady) alfectionately kneeling down, proposed to this old lady. now your opinion give politely and riddle me this and riddle me rightly-— who claims her hand? (asicle.) here's half-a-crown! . [t ippirlg him. sent. no doubt the syndic of this town. mats (dancing). exactly s —the truth you speak—- (to dame). away—your love-sick syndic seek-— you have no claim upon me, for unhappily i’m the governor! sent. oh yes, he is the governor! mats (delighted). ‘ there! sent. no doubt he is the governor! mats. there! sent. against you, ma’am, i must decln.re—- this gentleman is the governor ! mats. there ! dame. but bless my soul— mats. the man is right! dame. that’s not the whole-— mats. it/s settled quite ! ensemble- dame. mus. it’s now my turn my wrongs to i’ve taken steps the court to all, square, s governor munck for squalls so fire sway, ma’am—i don't prepare ! care ! i his excellency. [during the ensemble a corporal’s guard enters-—the sentry is relieved, and griffenfeld, now dressed as a private hussar, is left in his place. the change is not noticed by the dame or mxrs. dame. _ one moment, pray—your words retrace, oh, sentinel, shortsightedl i to the governor of this place, my troth securely plighted-— now pray don't treat this question lightly, but riddle me this and riddle me rightly—- who claims my conjugal embrace? grif. of course, the governor of this place ! dame. (dancing). exactly so! you well decide! i am, ha! ha! the governor’s bride- the governor you, you can't deny-— argal, the governor's lady, i! _ g;-ff, she is the governor's lady ! mats. what ! grif. of course, the goverer’s lady ! m'ats. “lhat! gri . you are the governor, are you not? then she’s the governor’s lady! mats. what! but bless my heart—- dame. (still dancing). that man is right! that’s but a part—- ddme. it’s settled quite! ensmrsls. dame. lllats. gnu‘. (aside). though basely you if i consent, may i be how capif’ally i plan may plan and plot, shot, and plot with me you’ll share with her to share my to cleverly cut the your governor's lot! governor's lot ! gordian knot ! [dame dances of in front of mats, who tries in vain to escape. grzf. (alone). it’s alright! they’re both committed to it,' and that little difficulty is off my hands at last! hallo! what's wrong now ? enter nanna and thora tidying their caps and much out of temper. thora. papa, a joke’s a joke,—but i don’t think it fair to _ make us plot against ourselves! nanna. i’m sure i enjoy a bit of fun as much as anybody, but when it comes to our being coupled, if only for an afternoon, with a brace of penniless admirers, who are disposed to take every advantage of the position in which they temporarily find themselves, why, it’s going a little too fnr—that’s all! azs excelleavcy, i grif. why, what have they been doing? thora. why, they've been unnecessarily realistic in their attentions. grif. unpleasantly so? thora. i said unnecessarily so. goodness knows, i don't mind realism when there's any prospect of its coming to any- thing definite, but as neither of these young men has a penny, the sooner it's put a stop to the better! grif. hasn't a penny! what are you talking about? why, they're magnificent matches l—court physician with the rank of baron!—sculptor extraordinary to the royal family with the title of count why, you grasping girls, what more do you want? nanna. oh, papa! that's all nonsense ! if these persons were really what they believe themselves to be, we wouldn't mind, but as they're both penniless young men, and we are penniless young ladies, the sooner we tell them the truth, the better. - - grif. but, my good girls, consider! don't go and spoil it all! think of the fun of it when they discover how they've been cheated ! oh, my dear girls, there's a rich and rare treat in store for us all! --- - [the girls, who have been chuckling through his speech, burst into hearty laughter. thora. upon my word, it ought to be extremely amusing ! patter trio, governor, nanna, and thora. grif. when a gentleman supposes that he comfortably dozes on a pleasant bed of roses (which are singularly rare)-- nanna. and discovers that it bristles, with uncomfortable thistles, in intemperate epistles his annoyance he'll declare- thora. when a man his temper loses his remarks he never choses, but expressive language uses, with a tendency to swear— grif. and when lovers are discarded their upbraiding will be larded with some epithets unguarded—you had better not be there ! nanna (disappointed). we had better not be there? thora (disappointed). we had better not be there? grif. (decidedly). you had better not be there ! il. '. had better not be there ! anna and thora. when these gentlemen conceited both they've been cheated, all our fun defeated—that's a thing we couldn't be so, however they may rave it, we'll und ably brave it; you may take your affid will certainly be there ! his excelleivcy. xii), } will certainly be thcre—- gév} will certainly be there— though {ylou} flout it, never doubt it, {twe } he y will certainly be there ! ) grif. their despair and their distraction and their keen dissatis- faction-—their exaggerated action, and the tearing of their hair— narma. their disgust and desperation when they see the situation some congenial occupation for the lawyers will prepare— t hora. we shall find their loud abusing both instructive and amusing, and of violent accusing there‘ll be symptoms in the air-— gz-if. and their libellous expressions and their angry indiscretions will be tried at quarter sessions, when i occupy the chair l nanna (gleefully). when you occupy the chair- thora (gleefully). when you occupy the chair-— gr_if. when i occupy the chair ! all three. when { yilm} occupy the chair. grif. when the case is quite completed, then the prisoner defeated with severity is treated as you’re probably aware- for it’s awfully provided that thejury shall be guided by my summary one-sided——which distresses labouchere. all three. it is rough on labouchere— it is hard on labouchere— oh, the dickens, how it sickens tender-hearted labouchere! [emit griffenfeld. nmma. really, thora, i can’t help feeling rather conscience- stricken. poor boys! i’m really afraid we’ve broken their hearts! . thora. it’s a pity they’re such nobodies. i sometimes think between ourselves . narma. hush! so do i—but here they come. . enter eemug and toateesssn. the girls retire up stage and listen. tort. do you know, i don’t care to be repulsed by : girl l‘m engaged to, count. erl. ' ‘hey certainly treated us very coldly, baron. mere innocent attentions—such as every girl expects from the man she’s going to marry . tort. remember, count, we are no longer a couple of adven- turers, we are great men, and we are entitled to expect that attentions shall be paid to us, now. (girls indulge in sup- pressed chuckles.) i think a little condescension on our part, a . . his excellency. _ , ]‘. little stand-offishness, an air of doing them a considerable favour, would not be misplaced. erl. i see what you mean, baron. a little of this sort of thing—“ good-day to you, my dear; good-day to you. pleased to see you, pleased to see you— — ” - tort. “ a little further off, please. we’ll tell you when we want the mixture as before.” don’t you think so, count? erl. i really think it’s only what is due to us, baron, i do indeed. [the girls comeforward pretending to weep bitterly. nanna (in afected tears). oh, please, we’ve been thinking it over, and we’re very sorry we were so un-kuk-kuk-kuk-kind to you just now. erl. (condescendingly). thank you, thank you. pray don’t name it. " tort. we thought you’d like a little attention-—but it’s not _ of ‘the smallest consequence. there—go away—there’s good r s. g thora (pretending to sob). oh, but we did like it—only— [bursts into tears. nanna (sobbing). we thought it more mai-mai.maidenly to be cuc-cuc-cuc-coy! [tears. nanna. by such a par-par-particular pa-pa-papa! thora. and we’re so afraid of mrs. gug-gug-gug-grundy! (violent burst of tears.) [both burst into floods of tears. erl. now, my darling child —nanna—dearest—d n’t cry like that! i can’t bear it! see, on my knees i swear to you that i will always-—always love you as i love you now! oh, don’t cry like that- you’ll break my heart—indeed you will! tort. my dearest thora—you mustn’t—really you mustn't ! it’s dreadful to see those pretty eyes so red with weeping—oh, i was a brute to be unkind to you, there—don’t be a little goose! i didu’t mean it . —upon my word i didn't! [both men are on their knees trying to console the two girls. the girls, who have been pretending to weep hysterically through this, suddenly burst into peals of hearty laughter. erl. (springing up). tortenssen, i do believe they’re laughing at us! thora. oh, aren’t the nobility shrewd! nanna. and isn’t the aristocracy quick at grasping a situation! toosrnnn. excellenc y. d.rs, who has taken of his coat, puts it on again, and prepares to take their names. mag. my name is anthony hurricane egg, bartholomew capperboy property skegg—- i haven’t done yet—-conolly maguire-— cripps. but really-— mag. i haven’t quite finished—esquire ! chorus (rising from their seats, and dancing up to the registrar and back again). his name is anthony hurricane egg, &c. ‘ [all sit down suddenly._ cripps (speaking). sir, the christian names are immaterial. mag. oh ! (sings) oh, i was born at pettybun on a saturday—on a saturday- cripps (speaking). your place of birth is also immaterial. mag. oh! (sings) in eighteen hundred twenty-one, - on the fourth of may-—on the fourth of may- cripps (angrily). ‘my dear sir, i don’t want your biography --you have told me quite enough ! "haste to the wedding.” . i i mag. very good. (to boranny.) now it’s your turn. (loudly.) now it’s your turn. (in a whisper.) now it’s your turn. b . oh !—my turn (advancing with dignity). sir (to carrrs), before i consent to become a witness in this iatter—— all (bursting into chorus). on a saturday—on a saturday! bo. i should like to express my views as to the qualifications of a witness——— all’ (as before). on the fourth of may—on the fourth of may. cripps. what is he talking about? b . in the first place he should be of full age. i am. in the second, he.should be a briton by birth. i am. in the third— all. oh, he was born at pettybun, on the fourth of may—on the fourth of may, in eighteen hundred twenty-one, on a saturday— n a saturday ! [all sit suddenly. , food. (looking of r.). oh, uncle, uncle! look here! [during the dialogue that follows boraddy has been much fascinated with the two milliners’ dolls’ heads, flirting first with one, then with the other, as if unable to make up his mind which of them he prefers. mag. what! my son-in-law elect kissing a young woman! it’s ' ! it’s ' ! foodle, my daughter is yours! food. maria! [putting his arms round her. enter woonreckee c. from r. wood. why in the world haven’t you gone back to your cabs? _ mag. sir, we ofl ! it’s oil‘ ! wood. very good. mag. you ought to be ashamed of yourself ! wood. i am. what have i done ? mag. you dare to ask that when i saw you through that door with a young woman in your arms ! wood. (aside). he saw me! (aloud.) i admit it, sir! maria (crying). he owns to it! all (crying). he owns to it! food. my darling! [embracing maria. wood. will you stop that hugging ? food. she’s my cousin— we were brought up together. mag. it’s quite allowable—she’s his cousin. iv. m i “haste to the wedding.” - wood. his cousin ? oh, then, the lady i was embracing is my cousin! . . . all. oh indeecl-—that’s quite another matter ! mag. it’s on again! foodle, my boy, it’s on again ! food. (relinquishing maria). old teetotum! mag. introduce me to your cousin—i’ll invite her to the wedding. wood. (aside). bella at maria’s wedding! (aloud) it’s of no use—she can’t come-—she’s in mourning. mag. what, in a pink dress? wood. yes— it’s for her husband. mag. (convinced). oh. well, we’re quite ready, sir, when you are (to crirrs). [all sit in a row opposite desk. wood. what are they doing ? cripps. i really must make a complete change. i’ll go into the next room—there’s no one there. ' [going towards door with his dry clothes under his arm. mag. where are you going ? _ uripps. i shall catch my death of cold if i don’t-—i really can’t help it—you must excuse me. “ [emit door r. mag. my friends, let us follow the registrar! [musia they all dance after crirrs in couples, boradny last, with one of the doll’s heads, and kissing his hand to the other. wood. where the deuce are they allgolng? enter bella c. from r. bella. here’s your specimen (giving remains of hat). i’nr very sorry, but i can’t match it. wood. what! bella. if you like to wait three weeks i can get you onelfrom florence. wood. three weeks! bella. i only know of one like it in london. wood. buy it--mind, i buy it.“ . ’ _ bella. impossible! i sold it a’we_ek ago to—;i.: .' ’ wood. to whom? ' _. ' . ' bella. to the marchioness crannies hsrb ronghl . ‘ . ' . . [exit it’arm. wood. this is pleasant! a marchioness! i e'an’t call on a marchioness and ask her how much she wants‘ for her hat! enter carers in, with his dry clothes under his dfm, pursued / the wedding party dancing as before, b(rp'aln >y' last; witlt “haste t' the wedding.” i _ the doll’s head. they eéveamt ajter celrrs l. music forte while they are on—_pianissimo'when they are o.. . wood. hi ! mr. maguire, where are you going? _ _ [is about to follow. enter jackson. jackson. sir, i’ve just come from home. wood. well, is the captain there still ?.'; jack. yes, he’s there,'but he ‘ain’t still. the lady has fainted, and can’t leave the house. wood. wrap her up in a blanket and send her home at once ! (emit j a kson.),i must have this hat at any rate. (refers to blue book.) the marchioness ‘of market harbor ugh—carlt n gardens. ’ll get married first, and then i’ll call on her. but what shall.i do with the wedding party? i know. i’ll shut ’em up in the duke of york’s column. i’ll say to thekeeper-, “ i engage this column for twenty-four hours—let no one out.” [emit. enter csrrrsfrom. l., with his dry clothes, very breathless. cripps. why the deuce do the people follow me everywhere? it’s impossible for me tochange my clothes l enter all the wedding party as before. music forte. .criprs runs round stage and ?’, followed by wedding party. boranny last, with the doll’.s head. he is‘ much emhausted with running. . " . act ii. seeneaa handsomely furnished front and back drawing-room ' in.carlton gardens. the two rooms separated by hand- some doublecurtains which are closed during the early part of the act. a sumptuous luncheon is laid on the table in back-room, but concealed from audience by curtains. doors r. and l. window up stage l. small tableii. with ease and bouquet. grand piano l.o. enter barns, an old family retainer. ' barns (announcing). the duke of turniptopshire! enter duke. _emit_ baims. ' duke. admirablel magnificent! what gorgeous decora- tions! what refined taste! what have we here? (looks “haste t' the wedding." through curtains.) a most luxurious cold collation! seven- and-sixpence a head, if it cost a penny! i wonder if (looking around him) there’s no one coming—i wonder if i might venture to take just one tartlet! i will— [takes a tartlet from table and eats ll. enters the marchionesb or market habborough. march. well, duke. duke. marehioness (embarrassed, with his mouthful)—i-—i —delighted to see you. march. (more in sorrow than in anger). ah, duke, duke —you’ve been picking the luncheon again! now that’s too bad ! duke. pm sorry—very, very sorry. forgive me, it was thoughtless-——criminal if you will, but i was ever a wayward child, accustomed to have his every whim gratified, and now, in middle age, i find it difficult to shake off the shackles that custom and education have riveted on me. [in tears. march. (in tears). you were my late husband’s early friend! duke (with an eflbrl). and now, my dear marchioness, whom do you expect at your concert this morning? tell me all—do not fear-—you can trust me implicitly! march. i feel i can! well, then, there’s lord and lady popton, the duke and duchess of deal, colonel coketown, the dowager duchess of worthing, lord and lady pentwhistle, and the archbishop of bayswater. duke (aside). all dem snobs! (aloud) and who sings? march. the most delightful creature in the world—no other than the distinguished falsetto, nisnardi, who arrived only a week.ago from bologna, and who has already turned all the crowned heads of europe! he can go up to g! duke. gad bless me, what a gift! march. you have no idea how deliciously eccentric he is. duke. well, you know, a man who can touch an upper g is not like us common fellers: he’s a genius——a genius. march. exactly. i asked him to sing two songs this after- noon, and sent him a cheque for guineas; here is his reply: (reads), “madam,"y u ask me to sing two songs. i will sing three; you ofifer me guineas—it is not enough-—— ” duke. dem foreigner! march. “ it is not enough; my terms are—a flower from your bouquet!” duke. a what ? march. “ a flower from your bouquet!” is it not romantic ? duke. it’s a poem—a “ballade!” pardon this weakness! [wiping his eyes. “[ /iste to the wedding." i fllarch. dear, dear duke! (wiping her egs.) you know the princess po!petti—with the pretty feet? duke. i know her pretty feet. march. what do you think were his terms for singing at her concert ? duke. i don’t know. he seems fond of flowers—perhaps a pot of mignonette? march. nothing of the kind—one of her old slippers! duke (in tears). don’t—demme, i can’t stand it—i can’t, indeed! march. what tenderness—what sympathy! (pressing his hand.) you were my late husband’s early friend! (noise and carriage heard.) here are my guests, and i’ve been crying! i mustn’t be seen in this state! duke, oblige me by receiving them—i’ll be down in one minute. [emit marcerosess. duke (takes out snuf-bom, opens it as if about to take snuf, produces powder-pufi’, and powders his face to remove traces of tears). why am i cursed with this tremnlous scnsitiveness? 'why are my heartstrings the sport and toy of every wave of sympathetic second-hand sentiment ? ah! ye small tradesmen and other members of parliament, who think rump steak and talk bottled beer, i would give ten years of mylife to experience, for one brief day, the joy of being a commonplace man! soxc.—dmus. oh butcher, oh baker, oh candlestick-maker, oh vendors of bzcoe and snuff- and you, licensed vittler, and public-house skittler, and all who sell sticky sweet-stui’r'— ye harbors, and messrs. the bond street hair-dressers (some shave you, and others do not)- yc greasy porkpie-men—ye second-hand flymen—- all people who envy my lot ( taking up tambourine), let each of you lift up his voice-- with tabor and cymbal rejoice that you’re not, by some horrible fluke, a highly-strung sensitive duke ! an over-devotional, super-emotional, hyper-chimerical, extra-hysterical, wildly-resthetical, madly phrenetical, highly-strung sensitive duke ! you men of.small dealings, of course you've your feelings-' 'l‘here’s no doubt at all about that— . when a dentist exacting your tooth is extracting, you howl like im aristocrat, "haste to the pvedd ./vg." but an orphan cock-sparrow, who thrills to the marrow a duke who is doubly refined . would never turn paler a petty retailer or stagger a middle-class mind! so each of you lift up your voice»- with cymbal and tabor rejoice, &c. [dances to tambourine accompaniment. enter babns. barns. your grace, a gentleman is below who desires to speak with her ladyship. duke (seizing him by the throat, with startling energy). his name—his name! do not deceive me, varlet, or i’ll throttle you! ' barns. i have known your grace, man and boy,‘ these eighteen months, and i have never told you a lie yet. the gentleman declines to give his name, but he says that he wrote to her ladyship this morning. . duke. it is he—the falsetto—the supreme nisnardi! show him up, and treat him with the utmost courtesy. he can touch an upper g ! ' _ ’ barns. an upper gi gad bless me, what a"giftl [emit in amazement. enter wo drecl{er timidly. wood (mistaking the duke for a servant). i say—chawles, come here, my man. half-a-crown for you. (gives him money.) now then, just give this note to her ladyship (gives him a note), there’s a good fellow. duke (pocketing the coin). in one moment; the marchioncss will be here directly. in the meantime, permit me to introduce myself-—the duke of turniptopshiro! wood. the what! duke. the duke?- wood. go on, you’re joking! duke. not at all- observe—(twirls round and postures.) are you convinced ? - wood. i am! (aside) and i took him for a flunkey! i've given a live duke half-a-crown-—and i‘m going to ask a live marohioness how much she wants forher hat! i shall never be able to do it! duke (aside). he speaks english very well, but he’s clearly an italian, he has such a rummy waistcoat. i’ll draw him out a bit. (aloud) i’rincess»—pretty feet—' old slippers—ah, you dog! "h/iste t' the wedding.” wood (puzzled). pretty feet ? . duke. yes, pretty feet—pretty little tootsicums! i’ve heard all about it, you see. . wood (aside). the upper circles appear to have a method of expressing themselves which is entirely and absolutely their own. (aloud) could i see the marchioness? duke. yes, i’ll send word to her. ha! ha! (with deep meaning). .. songs-—old slippers—flower from a bouquet—three thousand guineas! my dear sir, you’re delicious—you.’re simply delicious! . [emit duke r. wood. it’s quite clear to me that i shall never be equal to the intellectual pressure of aristocratic conversation. so i’m married at last—really and truly married. on leaving bella’s, we started for the church—maria and i were made one—and now if i can only get the hat from the marchioness, everything will end happily. (looking out of window.) there’s the wedding party—in eight cabs—waiting patiently until i come down. i told them—ha! ha !—thatthis was the piccadilly hotel, and that i would go up and make arrangements for the wedding breakfast! and they believe it! i hear the mar— chioness. i hope she got my note. enter marchioness b. she approaches him melodramatically. march. stop—don’t move! let me gaze upon you until i have drunk you in. oh! thank you. (woodrecker, much astonished emhibits symptoms of ncrvousness—buttoning his coat, putting on his hat and taking it of again.) ah, you are cold— cold—cold! you are unaccustomed to the rigour of our detest- able climate. . wood. as you say, it’s a beast of a climate-—— march. ah, sir, i can offer you an hospitable welcome and an appreciative company, but i cannot—alas! i cannot ofier you an italian sky! wood. pray don’t name it—it’s not of the least consequence. (aaide.) i never shall understand the aristocracy! march. ah, bella italia! it’s a lovely country ! wood. it is a dooced lovely country! oh, i beg pardon! march. what a wealth of southern emphasis! what italian fervour of expression! wood. i—i did myself the honour of writing a note to your ladyship——- march. a most delightful note, and one that i shall always carry about me as long as i live; . wood. thank you. (aside) she’s very polite. (aloud) in that note i ventured to ask you to grant me a slight favour. i “haste to the wedding?’ march. oh, of course—how extremely dull of me ! well, you shall have what you want. wood. really? march. really-—though you’re a bold bad man ! . [turns to bouquet. wood. at last, at last the hat is mine! i wonder how much she wants for it. shall i beat her down? n , no, you can’t beat down a marchioness ! she shall have her price. march. (giving him a flower). there is the flower you asked for-—bold bad man ! . wood. a flower? there’s some mistake-—i want an article of attire. march. an article of attire ? wood. yes; didn’t you get my note ? mm.ch. yes, here it is. [taking note from her bosom. “ my terms are—a flower from your bouquet—nisnardi.” wood. nisnardi? what’s that? march. hush, eccentric creature-—niy guests arearriving. enter barns. barns (announcing). lord and lady popton, colonel coke- town, the marquis of barnsbury, lady pentwistle, the arch- bishop of bayswater, and the duke and duchess of deal. [emit door. enter loen and lady porton, colonel coketown, and other guests. march. my dear duke—my dear lady popton—allow me to present to you the incomparable n isnardi! [all bow reverentially to woonrackee. lady p. (crossing to him). and are you really n isnardi? wood (aside). i must brazen it out. (aloud.) i am. lady p. incomparable falsettist! wood. (aside). good heavens, i’m a singer—a falsettist ! why, i’m a bad baritone ! lady p. and are you really about to favour us with a specimen of your marvellous talent ? ll/[a/rch. signor nisnardi is most kindly going to sing three songs. how delightful ! all. charming ! what a treat! wood. (aside). i must get out of this fix at once. (aloud.) marchioness, i have a most extraordinary and—i am afraid you will say-—unreasonable request to make. “haste .to the wedding.” march. oh, name it ! wood. but it’s a secret! march. oh, i’m sure our friends will excuse us. [guests bow, and emeunt r. and l. wood. marchioness, i am the slave of impulse ! march. i know you are. wood. eh? oh! well, it’s a most remarkable thing, but when a whim enters my head, i lose my voice until it is grati- fied. a whim has just entered my head, and listen ! [grunt march. heavens, what is to be done? duet.—wo drecker and marchioness- wood. _ the slave of impulse i, born ’neath the azure sky, of beautiful firenze. with fierce desires i brim. wben i conceive a whim, that whim becomes a frenzy ! . a wish ungratified, wounds my italian pride, ~ like stab of sharp stiletto. my blood is turned to gall ; i cannot sing—i squall, and, this is worst of all-— away goes my falsetto, my exquisite falsetto ! maneh. (aside). wool). oh, heavens ! should it befall, my blood is turned to gall, my guests it will appal, i cannot sing‘, i squall, if, when assembled all— and, this is worst of all- away goes his falsetto l away goes my falsetto, his exquisite falsetto! my exquisite falsetto ! illarch. lord of the upper g, by peers of high degree assiduonsly courted ; falsettist all divine, no heaven-sent whim of thine ought ever to be thwarted. society should strain each nerve to spare thee pain, whatever’s on the tapis .- the impulse i admire that’s born of southem fire : i know what you r‘quincker<- from the marchioness’s, whom nobody guesses to be of the rank of a peeress or peer—- in courtesy lacking they sent us all packing, and each with a very fine flea in his ear. those johnnies and jackies the overfed l wkies they “ went for” the bride and her guests with a rush—- ‘ the combat was heated but we were defeated by msolent armies of powder and plush. “if/iste to the wedding.” i and mister maguire, who's raging with ire, has taken an oath by the powers that he, that restaurant-keeper shall not close a peeper until she has published an apologee! ha! ha! ha! ha! until she has published an_apo ogee l bun. well, sir, wha’s all that to me, sir? will you go, sir? wood. oh, i see (raising blanket), you’re taking a footbath. bun. (furious). i won’t listen to you. i’m not well. i’ve got a headache! who are you ? wood. woodpecker tapping—married this morning : the wedding party is at your door, in eight cabs. “ bun. i don’t know you, sir! what do you want? wood. your wife. bun. (rising). my wife ! do you know my wife? wood. not at all, but she possesses something that i most anxious to purchase. bun. we don’t sell it. will you go? wood. not till i’ve seen mrs. bunthunder. bun. she's not at home. [_,s' ,'ngs_ wood. nonsense, i know better! i dare say she’s in here—at all events, i mean to look. [woonreoeer closes screen round bunthunder, conceal- ing‘him- from the audience, and leaving his‘ boots outside on his l. woonreckee then runs into room . bun. he’s a thief! he’s a burglar! wait one moment- only one moment, until i’ve finished dressing! enter maonnze l., limping. mag. my son-in-law is a most remarkable person; he invites us to his house, and when we get there, he shuts the door in our faces! fortunately the lock didn’t catch, and here i am. now, now i shall be able to take off these confounded tight boots which have been bothering me all day! bun. (in screen). one moment—only one moment! [taking his trousers, which.are hanging over the top of the screen. " _ = ' mag. hallo, woodpecker! he’s in here. ha! (seeing bue' 'hunnes’s boots.) the very thing; that’s uncommonly lucky! (takes of his own boots and puts on burzthnndsrfs.) the very thing ! (they are much too largefor him.) dear me, what a relief ! [puts his own boots by screen, where boe'rnum)es’s were. i "haste to the iveddi./vg." bun. (reaching round screen for his boots, and takes maguine’s). now for my boots-—wait one m ment‘—only one moment! mag. i say, my boy, your wife’s below. bun. oh, my wife’s below, is she? j ust one moment—i’m nearly ready ! mag. all right! come up. [emit maguire. at the same moment enter boraddy. bun. (in screen). my feet seem much swollen, i can scarcely get my boots on; but no matter. now, then! (coming out of screen sees borandy, whom he mistakes for woonreoken, swings him round.) now, you scoundrel, i’ve got you ! a b . d n’t—i don’t want to dance—l’m quite tired out l i’ll go downstairs and tell them all to bun. it’s not the same—it’s another of the gang! (noise heard within.) he’s in there ! [rushes of r. bo. another wedding guest, and in regimentals, tool dear, dear»-woodpecker is certainly doing it uncommonly well! [music, “ haste to the wedding.” enter maguibe, foonln, maria, and the wedding party, all dancing on in couples. they dance round the stage, and range themselves at back. mag. that’s right, my dears—stop there, because woodpecker hasn’t quite finished dressing—he’.s behind the screen, and he won’t be a minute, and you mustn’t look, any of you. (the screen is now open.) woodpecker, my boy, your wife is here; and while you’re completing your toilet, i'll give you both a bit of matrimonial advice, drawn from my own experience. sono.—ma<;ume. if you value a peaceable life, this maxim will teach you to get it: in all things give in to your wife,- i didn’t— lived to regret it. my wife liked to govern alone, and she never would share with another ; remarkably tall and well grown, . she had plenty of muscle and bone, with an excellent will of her own-— and my darling takes after her mother i oh, if early in life i had happily known how to humour : wife with a will of her own, we should not have been snarling all day at each other~ and, remember, my darling takes after her mother! . “iiaste t' the wedding." never wake up her temper,—i did- and smash went a window, instanter ; invariably do as you’re bid,- i didn’t-—bang went a decanter. give in to each whim,- declined—- at my head went a vinegar-cruet. whatever inducement you find, never give her advice of a kind that is known as “ a bit of your mind,’’—- i did—and the crockery knew it ! oh, if early in life i had happily known, dtc. though her aspect was modest and meek, she could turn on the steam in a minute : her eru tions went on for a week- esuvius, my boy, wasn't in it. give your wife of indulgence her fill, though your meals be unpleasantly scrappy-— never look at her milliner’s bill ; gulp down that extravagant pill, and you may, and you probably will, be bankrupt—and thoroughly happy ! oh, if early in life i had happily known, c'te. [mnsic, “haste to the wedding.” wedding party all dance ?‘. enter woooreckee l., with several hats in one hand, and the specimen in the other. duet.—woonraoken and bunrr-rurmnn. wood. i've come across hats of all colours and sorts, but none like this specimen, demure ! enter bunthunder l. bun. (seizing him). thief ! burglar! away to the criminal courts, with your skeleton keys and your jemmy ! wood. excuse me, you’re really mistaken in that- l’ll prove it, if patient you’ll be, sir: this mommg my horse ate a young ady’s hat- bun. well, what does that matter to me, sir? wood. but she's now at my lodgings—and leave them she won't until i’ve produced her another ! bun. by all that is prudent and proper, why don’t the young lady go home to her mother? already too long she has tarri.ed—- why don’t the young widow withdraw? wood. young widow? good gracious, she's married, and her husband can claim her by law ! v. n “haste to the wedding." elrssmnm. bunthunder. woonrlscrum. fire and fury ! cease your fury ! judge in ermine judge in ermine (with a jury) my injury shall determine shall determine ! how to treat this social wrong, your remarks are clearly wrong, s r— sir—- come along, sir-come along, much too strong, sir—much too sir! strong, sir! [blmthundeu drags woom'rzckee of .. music changes to “haste to the wedding.” the wedding party enter ., dance in couples across the stage, after them. boranny last with the doll’: head. scene cnengss. scene ii.-.—a street, with square in the distance. a rainy night. woodreoken’s house l., another house beyond it. police-station e. a lamp . supported by brackets from each side of the stage. a lamp-post l.u.e. window of first floor of police-station is ‘practicable. door-steps to woom>ecker’s house, a light in one window. a gutter crosses the stage. . [music, “ haste to the wedding.” wedding party enter from l. u. ., dancing in couples round stage, with umbrellas up. boraddy politely holding umbrella over doll’s head. hill/llag. (lg: d 'rtt_gf lht€} )’t). ghis way, my friends—this way! a o. ' on or egu er. [he jumps ovetr _it—all the wedding party follow, jump- ’ing over i in succession. maria. oh, papa, where's woodpecker ? mag. eh? isn’t he here? why, he has given us _the slip again! ._ . maria. papa dear, i’m so tired—i can’t go any farther! [sits on step of woodreckrm’s house. food. and my new boots hurt me so that i must sit lc ;zi\;n! . [crosses and sits er. mag. (stamping about in major-general’s boots). ha, ha! so did mine, but i’ve changed ’em ! ' ‘ maria. oh, papa, why did you send away the cabs ? mag. why? i’ve paid ’em clcvcn pounds fifteen already- isn’t that enough ‘! but where are we ? all. i don’t know! _ _ . maria. woodpecker told us to follow him to his l.ou.e. n . , little pickleboy gardens, mulberry square. “fl/ ste to the weddiivg.” mag. perhaps this is mulberry square. (to borandy.) your great grandfather used to live in london—is this mulberry square? i bo. yes-—yes, it is—splendid—splendid weather for ducks and peas ! ha, ha ! oh, yes—for ducks and peas ! mag. he’s doting—doting! enter wrlkmsorr, a policeman. wilkinson (sneezes). mag. here’s a policeman, l’ll ask him. (very politely.) i beg your pardon, but will you be so polite as to tell me if this is little pickleboy gardens, mulberry square ? willa. (sternly). move on! [emit. mag. and i pay taxes to support that overbearing under- ling! i feed him, i clothe him, i lodge him, and i pay him; and in return he tells me to move on! insupportable bureau- crat! food. (who has climbed up lamp-post and read name of street). hurrah! little pickleboy gardens. it’s all right— here we are ! mag. and here is no. . (to maria, who is sitting on the doorstep.) get up, my dear. maria. papa dear, it’s no use—i must sit down somewhere. mag. n ot in a muddy road, in a thirty-seven and sixpenny wedding dress, my love. why don’t they come ? [knocks. food. there’s a light in the first floor. mag. then woodpecker must have arrived before us. ( calls.) woodpecker! woodpecker! all. woodpecker! woodpecker! enter wmkinsos, r.i.e. wilkinson (to boranny, who has fallen asleep on step). now th can't have that noise here! shak h‘ . m on! , mdild on, will you? ( .s am) we [pushing his shoulder, which is muddy. bip. 'ji.‘ll lagk ygou, nily deiar friend; don’t you trouble to brush ito " ot atw en goin. , [emit wilkin}lson, l.u.e. jackson opens door of wood- ‘noker’s ouse. mag. hurrah! here we are! come in! [music commenples “haste hth; wedding” as the wed- ing party ance into t e ouse. of {lag}? itpp. ‘(all stop suddenly in arrested attitudes.) out s on,_ " “‘haste to t./[e wedding.” i i mag. eh? jack. impossible! more than my place is worth. why, the lady is still upstairs ! [movement mag. a lady! what lady ? jack. the lady who is stopping with master-—the lady without a hat. mag. a lady stopping with your master! food. on his wedding-day! ' maria. and without a hat! [faints into foonls’s arms. zllag. (furiously). it’s ! it’s off! i’ll get you divorced, my dear. foodie shall have you! food. maria! . mag. come along back to pettytwiddllm. there’s a train at eleven; we shall just catch it. ' maria. oh, papa--—papa mag. what is it, my child? maria (tragically). am i never—never to see woodpecker again ‘b mag. never! ‘ maria. woodpecker, whom i loved so fondly, and who was the very music of my little life ? mag. never! maria. oh! then hadn’t i better take back my wedding- presents? mag. my dear, you’re a very sensible girl. to be sure you had. (to jackson.) go and bring out all my daughter’s wedding-presents—mind—every one! [emit jackson into house. . enter woodrecker, as if pursued. all. here is the monster! mag. it’s "! it’s "! you—you serpent! wood. hold your tongue—be quiet ! i hear him—he‘s coming! mag. who’s coming? wood. major-general bunthunder. (listening.) no—he’s missed me—he’s got tight boots and he can’t run. there’ll be time to get leonora out of the house before he arrives. mag. ohol so, sir, you own to leonora? wood. of course i own to leonora! all. oho! he owns to leonora! enter j acksou from house with his arms full of wedding- presents, done up in parcels. jack. here are the wedding-presents. i "fl/ ste .to the weddi \lg.” mag. my friends, let us each take a parcel (jackson gives a parcel to each, maaume gets the bandboar given by borandy in act ). and now off we go to pettytwiddllm! ' wood. what’s all this? . ‘jack. wedding-presents, sir. . _ . wood. oh, this won’t do! drop those things directly! . . [all drop their parcels. mag. nonsense—pick them all up again! " [all pick up parcels. woonreckee and maoumr. struggle for the bandboac. . . bo. take care—you’ll crush it! it’s a leghorn hat worth twenty pounds! wood. what! bo. it’s my little present—i’m in the trade. i sent to florence for it, for my little niece! ‘ wood. give it here. (takes bandbox from macuree—.-takes out straw hat and compares it withthe fragments.) good heavens, it's the very thing! here’s the cockatoo—and the armadillo’s claw—and the mackerel—and the peach-—why, it’s the very thing i've been looking for all day! [shafes hands with bor. dy, holding the bandbom under is arm. . mag. (aside). a hat worth twenty pounds! he sha’n’t have it, the scamp! [takes hat out of bandbox unobserved, and shuts box again. . . ' wood. (who believes that the hat is in the bow). wait one moment-—i’ll give her the hat and then we’ll all go in and enjoy ourselves. . [emit into house. mag. (who has watched him of). now, my friends—off we go to pettytwiddllm. . _[all going. enter w lkrnson. wilk. hallo! what’s all this? what are you doing with these parcels? . ' mag. we—we are moving. . . . k wi'lk.iy;{vhat! at this time ’ night? this won’t do, you now- now you. . " -. . mag. sir! . r _ wilk. what have you got here, eh? : e lglalglé 'l(‘hat? } that’s -}? carriage }l%ck.th , k i . opens mu -bom and nds a mu . ats very i e a carriage clock! come along-—all on yer, in ‘yer go! [musz'c, “haste to the wedding.” they all dance into . “haste to the weaddiawg.” station-house, except bopaddy who is walking off slowly, talking to his doll's head. bo. (to doll's head). it was a nice ickle gal! it was a very nice ickle gal! don't know that i ever saw a nicer ickle gal! wilk. (coming out of station-house, crosses to bopaddy). now, then—come along—in yer go! - [wilkinson taps bopaddy on the shoulder, and points to station. bopaddy mildly expostulates, and resumes his flirtation with the doll's head. wilkinson seizes him roughly. bopaddy again remonstrates. wilkinson shakes him, bopaddy suddenly turns furious, flies at wilkinson, knocks him down, seizes his staff, thrashes him soundly, and finally drags him off triumphantly into station. enter woodpecker, captain bapp, and leonora from house. wood. come along, you are saved ! i’ve found the hat! make haste, put it on and be off before your husband arrives! - [he gives them the band-box. they open it. all. empty | - wood. it was there—i’ll swear it was! my old villain of a father-in-law has stolen it! (enter wilkinson from station- house.) where is my father-in-law? wilk. where? station-'us. . wood. and my wedding party? wilk. station-’us. run 'em all in. [exit wilkinson. wood. and they’ve got the hat! what is to be done? bapp. wait a moment—i know the inspector—he'll give it to me if i explain the facts. - - [exit into station-house. h bun. (without). stop! cabman! hi! put me down ere ! - leo. heavens! my husband! i'll run and hide in your house! - - - - wood. not for worlds! he's coming to search it! . leo. but what shall i do? - wood. i know! i'll give you in charge. hi! policeman. (re-enter wilkinson.) take this woman away. drunk and disorderly. [tipping him. wilk. (r. crosses to her). what, agin? come along-i know yer! [walks her into s' ". enter bunthunder, hobbling. bun. so, here you are! open your door! . i brains out, and your brains out, and my own brains . “ /asm ro res weddi./vg." wood. by all means—only take me last! [emit boethondee into house. [cartain barr appears at window of station-house, first floor. bapp. quick! quick! here’s the hat! wood. throw it out—make haste! _ [barr throws hat, which rests on the lamp—; 'ust out of reach. wood. confound it! [tries to unhook it with his umbrella, but in vain. re-enter bun' ‘l‘lunder from house. bun. she’s not there! forgive me, l’ve been unjust! wood. you have. come under my umbrella. [talees buntr uener’s arm, and puts up umbrella to conceal hat. they both stand under the lamp. bun. no, no—it doesn’t rain! put the umbrella down. it’s quite fine overhead. wood. but it’s so wet underfoot. bun. that’s true. l’ve made a great _fool of myself, sir. wood. you have. [he jumps to unhook the hat with his umbrella, and makes burrthuuner jump too. bun. i apologize, sir. wood. i think you should, sir. [jumps. bun. forgive me, sir. wood. i do, sir. [jumps. bun. what are you jumping for? wood. violent cramp—indigesti n. can’t help it-—always takes me so. bun. indeed! have you tried—-- (woonrecker jumps again and comes down on bunthunder’s toes.) don’t, sir! i won’t be trodden on by bridegrooms! enter leonora from station, followed by maoume, bomndy, and all the guests—one_of whom unhooks the hat, which falls to the ground.‘ mag. it’s all right—it’s all right! the captain has squared the inspector, and we leave the court without a stain on our characters! oh, it’s a great country ! finale. cuorws. free, free ! hurrah ! free free ! hurrah! false charges fride into thin air-— (this is a great countree !) - .- \" ’. '‘ ’ o . ; . . - . _. - . - . ’ . ‘ -‘ ’ ‘ . . - < .- " . . . " . . ‘" . . . _j " - . .. ’.‘ "‘: .’ fallen fairies; or, the wicked world. fallen fai ries; _ on, the wicked world. act i. sce>re.—fairyland, which for the purposes of the play, is sup- posed to be situate on the upper side of a clonal which floats over the earth. the scene represents a land of ideal beauty, with fountains, trees, waterfalls, the. at l. is the fairy queen's bower. darine and locnme are discovered on an eminence r.c., up stage, which overlooks gap in the cloud. locrine. oh, world below! oh, wicked world, where sin and woe lie all unfurled ! oh, world of shame, of guilt and greed, where joy in name is woe indeed! may angels‘ tzts be shed on thee, thou wicked world of misery ! [as locrine sings, fairies enter from diferent approaches and fill the stage, neonns, zayda, coea, lila, and others leading them. enter darine. som. darine. oh, picture to thyself a mortal crew sinning throughout their lives, as demons do ! fierce wild barbaric shapes, all foul within- howling with hunger for more sin—more sin ! fallen fa irie s ; or, chorus. neodie (re selene. zuydu. fierce wild barbaric shapes, all head and tail ; some like red raving apes, some clad in scale ; others like dead-fleshed ghouls with horny eyes, squatting on black toadstools of monstrous size ! all of them foul without and foul within ; all glimmering in the lurid light of sin ! all of them fonl without and foul‘ within ; all glimmering in the lurid light of sin ! ciz.). selene comes ; as silvery moon serene, radiant with lovelmess, our sister-queen ! enter: sslems. cnorws. pure as the air, sweet as the morning dew, cometh our queen ! bright in all eyes as heaven's ethereal blue, cometh our queen! spirit of love! as thou hast ever been, be to us evermore, oh sister-queen l unsullied source of tranquil joy, pursue thy course of pure employ- be thou, as thou hast ever been, our all-beloved sister-queen! dear sisters, i bring news. ere very long, lutin, who, by the will of that great king to whom we all yield faithful suzerainty, left fairyland to join him in mid-earth, will home return. he is the only one of our immortal race who has set foot upon that wicked world! lutin returning! he will set at rest our wild and wondering theories, and reveal, in picture-painting words, the demon deeds of all the goblin murder-mongers that infest that sink of seething infamy! enter ethais, a male fairy, followed by phyllon, another ethais. male fairy. in truth, dear sister, if man’s face and form were a true index to his character, he were a fearsome thing to look upon. fallejvfairies ; ox, darine. we to ascertain are eager all the ills that did beleaguer and assail thy mortal portals whilst thou wast among the mortals. f leta. didst thou join in_all their revels? drink and dance with all their devils? didst thou see, with awestruck daring, dicer dicing, swearer. swearing ? zayda. didst thou watch, with sorrow sobbing, liar lying, robber robbing, drinker drinking, gorger gorging, pinker pinking, forger forging? locrine. cooer cooing, biller billing, wooer wooing, killer killmg, prater prating, blabber blabbing, hater hating, stabber stabbingi all four. kicker kicking, beater beating, sticker sticking, cheater cheatmg ? tell us all that did befall— tell us some and tell us all ! chorus. tell us all that did befall-— tell us some and tell us all ! didst thou join in all their revels? didst thou dance with all their devils ? didst thou watch, with sorrow sobbing, liar lying, robber robbing? &c. tell us all that did befall- tell us some and tell us all ! latin (rcit.). what ! tell you all? not so ! all that down there occurred? ’twould numb your souls with awe— you know not what you ask! describe you all i know? repeat you all i heard? narrate you all i saw? god save me "from such a task! one tale i'll try to tell—it will suffice to illustrate their tendency to vice! sonc. —lutin. latin. one incident i’ll tell that will appal each gentle little heart and head. come, fairies, gather round me, one and all—- (the details to impart i dread !) a tale to cause a demon’s flesh to creep, and absolutely shock his ears ; _ 'txould silinimon tears to eyes that never weep, nd me t a re rock to tears! chorus. ’twonld melt a iigry rock to tears ! latin. so horribly bad that tale appears, it’s scarcely fit for fairy spheres; ’twould outrage e’en a demon's ears- and i’m going to tell it to you, my dears l . the wicked woxzp. i chorus (in great delight). he's going to tell it to us, my dears lutin. although 'twill make your blood run cold, the terrible details i’ll unfold ! chorus. so horribly bad that tale appears, it's scarcely fit for fairy spheres; 'twould outrage e'en a demon's ears- lutin. and i’m going to tell it to you, my dears : there was a gallant knight of portugee, who loved a moorish maid so well that he took ship and sailed for barbaree (that's where the little jade did dwell). he journeyed o'er the stormy sea apace (of nothing was that knight afraid), and when at last they met in an embrace, what do you think that naughty maiden said? chorus. we wonder what the little hussy said : lutin. she said—but no, their dark careers would shock your souls and draw your tears; they're quite unfit for decent ears— and i'm hanged if i'll tell 'em to you, my dears! chorus (*# e'll be hanged if he'll tell 'em to us, my dears! lutin. first thoughts are silver-second, gold; and i'm sorry to say that they can't be told ! chorus (vered). his tale is cast in mocking mould- he says it is both bad and bold; we hoped for details, and behold— lutin and chorus. # sorry to say that they can't be told ! ethais and phyllon enter. lutin. attend. obedient to our king's command, i met him in mid-earth. he bade me send both ethais and phyllon down below. ethais. down to mid-earth? lutin. down to mid-earth at once. he hath some gift, some priceless privilege, with which he would endow our fairy world, and he hath chosen phyllon and thyself to bear his bounty to this home of ours. ayda. another boon? why, brother ethais, what can our monarch give that we have not? phyllon. in truth i cannot say! ... 'twould seem that we had reached the sum of fairy happiness! selene. but then we thought the same before our k endowed us with the gift of melody; and now how tame our fairy life would seem iv. o ‘fallen fairies ; or, ethais. selene. were melody to perish from our land! well said, selene. come, then, let’s away, and on our journey through the outer air we will take note of its inhabitants and bring you full account of all we see. farewell, dear sisters—- brothers, fare ye well ! [etmus and phyllon take leave of the ¢'airies and zayda. darine. selene. emit lrrrm. now here’s a riddle that i cannot solve :- why do these mortals bear their weight of woe when they can end it at their will? they need not live unless they like. nevertheless, with swords and daggershanging at their sides, with drowning seas and rivers at their feet, with deadly poisons in their very grasp, men live, and live— and seem to like to live! how strangely inconsistent l _ not at all. with all their misery—with all the sin-— with all the elements of wretchedness that teem on that.unholy world of theirs, they have one great and ever-glorious gift that compensates for all they have to bear! descend through the gap in the cloud. soxc.—srsl <:ne. with all the misery, with all the shame that stain the earth, . one holy influence these mortals claim—- a gift of priceless worth ! the gift of l ve——shield against deadly foes that crowd in serried shoals— — a love that's anodyne to all the woes that wring their souls ! oh,.kindly love ! man sorrowing and oppressed, . beneath his load of shame would surely fall, but for the sweet enchantment in his breast that tells him that he bears no load at all! in its most pure and most enduring form it knows no end ; to deed of shame or stress of worldly storm such love will never bend. time cannot wither it, nor death destroy; when the relentless thief has robbed it of the power to live on joy, it lives on grief l . the. wicked world. oh, wondrous love-—pure as the silver sky ! even when death has set the loved one free, this love supernal doth not—cannot die ; it lives upon the loved one’s memory ! [during this song, the fairies, who at the commencement were scattered over the stage, have very gradually crept nearer and nearer to her, until, at the finish, they are grouped closely around her. ‘ darine. why, what have we in all our fairyland to bear comparison with such a gift! zayda. oh for one hour of such a love as that, o’er all things paramount! why, after all, that wicked world is the true fairyland! zara. why, who can wonder that poor, erring man clings to the world, all poisoned though it be, when on it grows this glorious antidote! zayda. and may we neverlove as mortals love? selene. no, that can never be. of earthy things, this love of theirs ranks as the earthliest. we do not need it in our perfect land. moreover, there’s this gulf ’tween it and us—- only a mortal can inspire such love, and mortal foot may never touch our land. zayda. but—is that so ? selene (surprised). of course! zayda. yet i have heard that there’s a half-forgotten law which says that, when a fairy quits his fairy home to visit earth, those whom he leaves behind may summon from that wicked world below that absent fairy’s mortal counterpart, and that that mortal counterpart may stay in fairyland and fill that fairy’s place till he return. is there not some such law? selene (horrified). and if there were, wouldst put that law in force? zayda (frightened). n.o, not for all the love of all the world ! selene. a man in fairyland! oh, horrible ! he would exhale the poison of his soul, and we should even be as mortals are- hating as man hates! i fallen fairies; or, darirze (enthusiastically). loving as man loves! [sslese looks at her in blank sm'_m"is»:. too horrible! still-— selene. w ? i see a trace da/rine. of wisdom lurking in this ancient law. selene. where lurks that wisdom, then ? i see it not! duet.-—darine and zayda. man is a being all accuse of every vice detestable : to virtue blinded, he pursues a course that’s unarrestable. yet if we let one man of shame observe our lives immaculate, he would (returning whence he came) ecstatically ejaculate- “ atone, stone! repent, repent! the pure alone know true content ! ” these tidings good, n doubt, he would ecstatically ejaculate! the news would take the world by storm, and be received with welcome warm ; those words he would, in some such form, ecstatically ejaculate ! man is a brute, oppressed by strange unintellectuality : enlighten him, and you will change his normal immorality. if we exhibited to some our course of life delectable, they might in course of time become comparatively respectable ! oh, picture then our joy sublime, if mortal men became in time-— suppose we say, in guarded way, comparatively respectable ! chorus. the news would take the world by storm, and be received with welcome warm, and all would be by this reform comparatively respectable ! darine. chorus. zayda. /# wicked world. selene (reflectively). there is some truth in this. zayda. some truth indeed ! oh, terrible, dear sister, to reflect that to our cold and culpable neglect ‘ all mortal follies may be chargeable ! selene (surprised). to our neglect? darine. it may in truth be so ! fleta. in very truth i’m sure that it is so! selene (after a pause). it shall be so no more! their sin is ours! but there—’tis easy still to make amends. a mortal shall behold our sinless state, and learn the beauties of our blameless life. come, let us summon mortal ethais ! [all delighted. darine. but- selene. not a word—l am resolved to this l darine. but, sister- selene. well ? darine (timidly). why summon only one ? selene. why summon more? darine. the world’s incredulous; let two be summoned to our sinless home; then should their wondrous story be received with ridicule or incredulity, one could corroborate the other. zayda. yes. phyllon has gone with ethais—let us call the mortal counterpart of phyllon too ! selene. two mortals! two unhappy men of sin in this untainted spot ! locrine. well, sister dear, two heralds of the truth will spread that truth at the least twice as rapidly as one ! selene. two miserable men! why, one alone will bring enough pollution in his wake to taint our happy land from end to end! zayda. then, sister, two won’t make the matter worse ! selene. there’s truth in that! [after a pause. the two shall come to us! [all the fairies are delighted. selene looks re- provingly at them, and they at once become demure. palleav fairies; or, (severely) we have deserved this fearful punishment ! - [all the fairies sigh. our power, i think, is limited to two ? locrine. unfortunately | selene, yes. more might be done had each of us a pupil to herself. scena.—selene. and now to summon them. but, sisters dear, receive our guests with gracious courtesies. show no repugnance to them while they're here; subdue your natural antipathies. kind, gentle, tender, pitiful be ye— be not severe, nor hastily condemn. treat them as though they were what they will be when they have seen what we shall be to them! all. we'll act as though they were what they will be when they have seen what we shall be to them : selene. what form of words accomplishes our aim ? darine. two roses shall be cast down from the skies, then, as each rose is thrown, pronounce the name of him whose mortal self it typifies, [giving her two roses. selene (taking them). ell then, fair rose, i name thee “ethais"— thy mortal counterpart we summon here. this rose is phyllon-come to our realms of bliss: by virtue of this talisman, appear! all. go, then, fair rose. we name thee “ethais”— thy mortal counterpart we summon here. sir phyllon, in our realms of blameless bliss, by virtue of this talisman appear! [hurried music. sir ethais and sir phyllon rise through the gap in the cloud, as though violently *mpelled from below. they are two handsome, barbaric hunnish knights, clad in picturesque skins and rude armour, and while bearing a strong facial resemblance to their fairy counterparts, present as strong a contrast as possible in their costume and demeanour. their swords are drawn, the knights having been interrupted in a duel. the fairies conceal themselves behind trees. recit. and duet.—sir ethais and sir phyllon. ethais. by god and man, who brought us here, and how? phyllon. where in the name of witchcraft are we now * - the wicked world, ethais (fiercely). why, who should answer that as well as thou? phyllon (surprised). - as i? ethais. • aye, devil's whelp, as thou! duet.—sir ethais and sir phyllon. ethais (fiercely). this is some wizardry of thy design to save thy sconce thou scurvy dog, no sorcery of thine shall serve e'en for the nonce : let all thy hell-hounds howl their requiem, and when i've done with thee i'll do with them | phyllon (savagely). bah! £ed no such devil-begotten stuff to flog a knavel this trusty falchion serves me well enough to make a coward cravel though demons swarm in myriads round about, or here or there we'll fight our quarrel out ! [they fight. the fairies, half concealed behind portions of the set, watch the combat with great interest. darine. what are they doing? selene. it's some game of skill. it's very pretty. darine. wery. [knights pause to take breath. oh, they’ve stopped ! phyllon. come, come-on guard | - zayda. now they begin again [they fight. ethais (seeing fairies, who have gradually surrounded him). hold, we are overlooked ! [ethais, who has turned for a moment in saying this, ts severely wounded in the right arm. selene. you may proceed, we like it much ! darine. you do it very well. begin again! ethais. black curses on that thrust! i am disabled ! ladies, bind my wound— and, if it please you still to see us fight, we'll fight for those bright eyes and cherry lips till one or both of us shall bite the dust! phyllon (aside to ethais). hold ! call a truce till we return to earth— -- bright eyes enough for both of us ! fallen fairies; or, ethais. i don’t know that ! well, there, till we return-— ' [shaking hands. ‘but, once on earth again, we will take up our argument where it was broken ", and let thy devils whirl me where they may we’ll reach conclusion and corollary ! [during this the fairies show that they have been very strongly influenced by the two knights. darine (gazing at phyllon). oh, fairyhood! how wonderfully like our phyllon! selene (gazingjin rapture at ethais). yes ! and see—how strangely like our ethais! (sighing.) thou hast a gallant carriage, gentle knight! ethais. it’s little wonder that i’m like myself! why i am he ! selene (sighing). no, not our ethaisl ethais. in truth i am the ethais of all who are as gentle and as fair as thou ! selene (tenderly). . ' ‘hat’s bravely said! thou hast a silver tongue ! why, what can gods be like if these be men? [during this dabine, zayda, looama, and other fairies show, by their manner, that they take a tender interest in ethus and phyllon. say, dost thou come from earth or heaven? ethais (gallantly placing his arm round selene and daema). i think l’ve come from earth to heaven ! selene (delightedly to zayda). oh, didst thou hear ? he comes from earth to heaven ! n , ethais, we are but fairies : this, our native home- our fairyland-—rests on a cloud which floats hither and thither as the breezes will. we see the world ; yet, saving that it is a very wicked world, we know it not. ' but on the lands o’er which our island hangs we shed fair gifts of plently and good-will, drop tears of love upon the thirsty earth and shower fair water on the growing grain. this is our mission. phyllon. ’l‘ a goodly one! but tell me now—why have you summoned us ? selene. because we seek to teach you solemn truths that now ye wot not of, poor gentlemen! (tenderly.) poor gentlemen! poor wayward gentlemen ! the pvicked pvorld. sosa.-—ss .ams. poor, purblind, untaught youths, we seek to teach ye truths which now ye wot not of, as we suppose! our aid ye sorely need, for ye are frail indeed- each a poor fragile reed swayed to and fro by every breeze that blows ! [taking his hand and stroking it tenderly. and we are good and pure, safe from temptations lure. (there are no tempters to disturb our rest!) unknown the fierce delights that lure attractive knights ‘ into disastrous plights ! (aside to zayda.) they are attractive, it must be confessed ! all. though worldly passions animate each breast, they are attractive, it must he confessed ! selene. poor maidens to deceive a potent spell ye weave, to which those all-too-willing victims yield ! . [kissing his hand. we fairies hope to show the ills that from it flow, and teach you to forego the marvellous enchautment that ye wield. [gently stroking his face. homeward returning then, pure, simple, guileless men, warn all poor maids with whom ye are in touch (would they live free from harm) to shun, in wild alarm, your strange mysterious charm ! (aside to zayda, siyhing.) the maids may shun it, but i doubt it much. all. would ye escape the plights that spring from love's delights, shun all attractive knights ! (aside to each other, sighirzg.) the maids may do so, but i doubt it much! [during s slene’s song and the chorus, darrne, zayda, and others have been dealing tenderly with phyllon. all show that they are deeply impressed by the two knights. ensemnle.—slr ethais and sm pmrlloe (nudging each other). phyllon. with keen remorse we tell you penitentially, our lives are coarse and villainous essential y—- fallen fairies ; ok, but bred and born in pagan principality, we view with scorn our former immorality. etlzais. of blameless state we've hope infinitesimal (we calculate its value to a decimal), unless at once you give, experimentally, each wayward duncc a polish-up, parentally ! phyllon (to ethais). this humble pie ls but a tough comestible w'hich he and i find rather indigestible ! ethais (to selene). that's just his way— an ill-bred oriental man. forgive him, pray-— of course he's not a gentleman ! phyllon. my penitence perhaps is unconventional. ethais (to selene). don't take ofl’ence-— i’m sure it's unintentional. both. we both are bound for fairy course probational ; so pray expound your system educational l trio.-—darine, zayda, and loonum. oh, gentle knights, with joy elate, we’ll teach you to abjure all earthly dross, and cultivate the blameless and the pure ! be docile pupils in our school, while we, with earnest heart, of all that's good and beautiful the principles impart ! reci' ‘.-—selene. . if my obedient pupils you would be, ' you must avow your loyalty to me. no doubt you recognize some formula, word-wise, that binds your heart in solemn fealty? courlets.—sm etmus and selene. ethais. when homage to his queen a subject shows (a queen that’s duly crowned), he puts his arm around that monarch’s waist—like this, [doing so. and plants a very long and tender kiss the wicked world. ; sometimes upon her cheeks of creamy rose, but, preferably, just below the nose! ' chorus. there is some reason—s we must suppose— “lhy preferably, just below the nose? phyllon. a still more binding process i propose: for though no doubt it’s true ne formal kiss might do, administered like this, [kissing damur. on cheek. the pledge works more effectively, i wis, when several dozen kisses he bestows- placed preferably just below the nose! chorus. i hope he'll tell us all before he goes why preferably just below the nose ? dririne (aside to selesa). ' a simple kiss a simple friendship shows. ’tis an insipid thing that no delight can bring, placed on the brow—like this. . [kisses selene’s brow. yet on these gentle knights’ hypothesis some unexpected virtue ’twill disclose, placed preferably just below the nose! chorus. some explanation certainly he owes—- why preferably just below the nose? selene. our outlook widens as experience grows. that form is quite unknown in our ethereal zone- a kiss is but a kiss. yet if these knights be surely bound by this, there is no need to ask them to disclose why preferably just below the nose? chorus. still there’s some reason—s we must suppose—— why preferably just below the nose. selene. that form is not in vogue in fairyland. still, as it holds on earth, no doubt ’twill have far greater weight with you, poor sons of earth, than any formula we could impose. ethais. its weight is overpowering! [about to kiss her. selene. but stay—- we would not wrest this homage from you, sir. or give it willingly, or not at all. phyllon. most willingly, fair queen, we give to you! selene. good—then proceed. [sm ethais kisses salese. sm pnvllon kisses darine. fallen fa iries ; or, ethais. there—does it not convey a pleasant sense of influence? selene. it does. ( to darine.) some earthly forms seem rational enough! [sir ethais staggers as though about tofaivzt. why, ethais, what ails thee? _ et/zais. nothing grave— i’m weak from loss of blood. here, take this scarf, and bind it round my arm—so—have a care! there, that will do till i return to earth, then -lutin, who's a very skilful leech, shall doctor it. selene (amazed). didst thou say lutin? ethais. yes. darine. how strange. sir ethais has a lutin tool lutin has entered unobserved. ethais. yes, he’s my squire—a poor half-witted churl, who shudders at the rustling of a leaf. he hath a potion that will heal my wound, a draught whose power works instantaneously. were he here i should soon- [sees fairy lutin, who has entered unobserved. why, here he is! by all the gods, pranked out in masquerade! (to lutin.) give me the potion! latin (in amazement). give thee what? ethais (impatiently). the draught! dost thou not see my wound? lutin (contemptuously). i have no draught! ethais. thou scurvy rogue, bade thee never leave thy home without it! thy hide shall pay! lutin. who is this insolent ? a mortal here in fairyland ? locrine. yes—two ! lutin. who are these men? . selene. the mortal counterparts of ethais and phyllon. look at them! . . dost thou not love them? imtin (indignantly). n o! cora. how very strangel . why, we all loved them from the very first! the wicked world. lutin. is this indeed the truth? darine (demurely). it is indeed. obedient to our queen’s command, we have subdued our natural antipathies. [fondling phyllon. zayda (demurely). they are our guests, all odious though they be, and we must bid them welcome to our home, as though e’en now they were what they will be when they have seen what we shall be to them. [fondling phyllon. lutin. be warned in time and send these mortals hence! why, don’t you see that in each word they speak they breathe of love ? selene (enthusia-stically). they do ! lutin. why, love’s the germ of every sin that stalks upon the earth! sosa.-lurm. ‘ the warrior, girt in shining might, knows, as he bares his sword, that, should he murderously fight, and cut and thrust and slash and smite (no matter wrong, no matter right), love will be his reward. the footpad nerves his coward arm with draughts of mead and mull, and stupefies his s ul’s alarm, and all his stealthy dread of harm, by pondering on the tipsy charm of some poor tavern trull ! oh, love’s the source of every ill ! compounded with unholy skill, it proves, disguise it as you will, a gilded but a poisoned pill ! love instigates the brawler bold ; for love the lover lies ; the miser hoards ill-gotten gold to buy the prize, so lightly sold, that looks so warm yet burns so cold— the love of two bright eyes ! for lawless love the wife elopes, and blights her husband’s lot ; for love denied the moper mopes, 'l‘o toast his love the tnper topes, with heavy heart the hoper hopes for love that loves him not ! oh, love’s a poison foul and fleet, nor is its horror less complete because, with devil-born deceit, it looks so fair and tastes so sweet ! fallen fairies; or, rscitatrve. zayda (to ethais). nay, heed him not! a tale has reached our ears that man is infamous in high degree, and he believes it—so indeed did we, till we beheld you, gallant cavaliers! darine (to selene). send him to earth—then we can summon here l‘lis mortal counterpart! [selene looks at her reprovingly. darine changes .he- ton e. another reed no doubt who stands in very sorest need of virtuous counselling and guidance clear! selene. well said, dariue! thy words are words of worth. lutin, begone at once! ethais. return to earth! insolent varlet, get thee quickly hence! lutin. oh, mortal plague! oh, walking pestilence! listen and learn, oh, incarnation of uncleanliness! song.—lutin. hark ye, you sir ! on yonder ball you’ve kings and queens to whom you fall, and humbly cringe and creep and crawl, cast dust and ashes too your head upon, that they some civil word may say to you. well, sir, there's not a king on earth, there's not a prince of royal birth, who would not barter all he’s worth to lick the very dust i tread up n- and i’m the meanest here! good day to you ! [lutin goes up stage and prepares to descend. cnonus. good day, to you-- away, to you— that’s all we have to say to you. don’t stay, to you— delay, to you—- dcnn' hurry back, we pray to you. away, to you— good day to you.- away ! good day ! [lutin descends. the fairies then turn to sir: emma and sz pnyllon. the ivicked world. eesmmus. fumes. oh, gallant gentlemen, you see our plight ; take pity on us, then, and give us light ! our prayer—ah ! do not spurn—- this we beseech : we brought you here to learn—- stay ye to teach ! we foolish fairies thought your guides to be, but we are all untaught, as ye may see. oh, gallant gentlemen, you see our plight, take pity on us, then, and give us light! take pity on us, list to our appeal as humble suppliants at your feet we kneel ! oh, grant this prayer, all other prayers above : teach us, oh, gallant gentlemen, to love! erhars and pl-iyllon to each other. as "allant gentlemen, we see their plight ; we will take pity, then, and give them light! their p‘rayer we will not spurn, so t ey beseech : they brought us here to learn—- we'll stay to teach ! these foolish fairies thought our guides to be, but they are all untaught, as we may see. as gallant gentlemen, (to fairies) we seek your plight ; we will take pity, then, and give you light! in pity, then, we list to your appeal as humble suppliants at our feet you kneel ! we’ll grant your prayer, all other prayers above, and show how gallant gentlemen can love. [some of the fairies kneel at the feet of the knights, selene embracing sm ethus; darine, zayda, and loonama hanging on sm puyllo ' ’s neck. the remaining fairies are grouped in attitudes of ent-reaty at the feet of the two knights. act ii. same scene by moonlight. the fairies, all but selene and darine, are discovered dis- contentedly watching the entrance to selen c’s bower. cuonus. for many an hour within her bower with ethais philandering, our excellent queen no doubt has been in roseate dreams meandering» fallen fairies; ?, as a matter of fact a risky act, so obviously detectab e— so very unfit we must admit is anything but respectable ! a fairy queen who dares conventionality despise, to put it very mildly, is exceedingly unwise. here is an act to which we cannot close our eyes, and must excite our indignation and surprise. fleta (dialogue). locrine. zctyda. chorus. zag/da. chorus. still, still selene watches ethais! for six long hours has she detained the knight within the dark recesses of her bower, under pretence that his unhappy wound demands her unremitting watchfulness! this, fairies, is our queen—the sinless soul to whose immaculate pre-eminence we, pure and perfect maidens of the air, accord our voluntary reverence! she is unfit to rule us as our queen! her conduct is an outrage on her sex! was it for this that we proposed to her to bring these erring mortals to our land ? is this the way to teach a sinful man the moral beauties of a spotless life? surely this knight might well have learnt on earth such mortal truths as she is teaching him! soxg.—zayda. i never profess to make a guess—- that smacks of perspicacity-— prophetical flight, my dears, is quite a cut above my capacity ; but such a barefaced display of taste for military society, ' the veriest dunce would deem at once a horrible impropriety ! _ a horrible impropriety ! i always view the acts unwise my sisters do with kindly eyes. but, truth to tell, such conduct-—well, lt smacks of impropriety ! it smacks of impropriety ! the wicked worzp. zayda, chorus. zayda. zayda. chorus. zayda. chorus. zayda. chorus. zayda. fleta (aside). selene. though it seems odd, and may offend, to kiss the rod i don't intend. it wrong i call to kiss at all ! a capital rule of life, my friend! was it for this to realms of bliss we summoned such rascality? is this the way to teach him, pray, the truths of pure morality? with wiles demure his love she'll lure, caressing and beseeching him ! no need to journey here to learn such truths as she is teaching him ! such truths as she is teaching him though sure we are that every youth should travel far to learn the truth, iie might, with care, have learnt, down there, such truths as she is teaching him ! such truths as she is teaching him ! you do not think me too severe ? we should not wink at faults, it's clear- we should not wink at all, i think. a capital rule of life, my dear! enter selene from bower. at last she comes. (to selene.) we are relieved to find that after such a lengthy vigil thou canst tear thyself away from ethais ! yes, he is sleeping now, but all day long he tossed and raved in wild delirium, shouting for arms, and, as it seemed to me, fighting his fight with phyllon o'er again. i watched him through the long and troubled ho- fanning the fever from his throbbing brow till he awoke. at first he gazed on me in silent wonderment; then, suddenly, seizing my hand, he pressed it to his lips iv. fallen fairies ,- or, and vowed that i had saved him from the grave! mark that—the grave! i—i had saved his life! he told me that he loved me-—loved me well-— that i had holy angel-eyes that rained a gentle pity on his stubborn heart- that i was fairer in his worldly eyes than all the maids on earth or in the clouds! zayda (spitefnlly). could any words more eloquently show the reckless of his delirium ? selene (surprised). nay, he was conscious then. _ fleta (very sweetly). no doubt he was. but, sister, in thy triumph recollect he scarce had seen us. zayda. thou hast wisely done to keep us out of sight. cage thou thy bird or he may fly to fairer homes than thine! selene (amazed). what mean you, sisters ? nay, turn not away! what have i done ? locrine (spitefully). indeed we do not know; but, lest we should affect his love for thee, we will at once withdraw ! [emit loceine curtesying ironically. leila (politely). good night to you! emit curtesying. neodie. good night! emit curtesying. zayda. good night! remember, cage thy bird! [eaeeunt all curtesg/ing. selene. how strangely are my sisters changed tome! have i done wrong? no, no, i’m sure of that! the knight was sorely stricken—he had died but for my willing care! oh, earthly love, thou mighty monarch, holding in thy grasp the holiest balm and most enduring woe, is it for good or ill that thou art here ? ethais has entered unperceined from the bower. he is very pale and weak, and his arm is in a sling. ethais. selene, i am weak; give me thine hand. [she goes to him. selene. my love, thou shouldst not yet have left thy couch. come,‘ thou hast need of rest.- the wicked i/vorld. efliuis. no, let me stay. the air revives me; i am strong again. and so thou trustest me? selene. ' ‘ in truth i clo although i cannot tell thee whence proceeds this strange, irrational belief in thee—- thee, whom i hardly know ! ethais. i see no marvel! selene. nay, my love—reflect: ' i am a woman, and thou art a man. well, thou art coine y—so, in truth, am i. we meet and love each other—that’s to say, i am prepared to give up all i have, my home, my very fairyhood for thee- thou to surrender riches, honour, life, to please the fleeting fancies of my will. and why? because i see in thee, or thou in me, astounding virtue, brilliant intellect, great self-denial, venerable years, rare scholarship or shining godliness? n ! because, forsooth, we’re comely specimens, not of our own, but nature’s industry! ballan.—selens. thy features are fair and seemly- _ a god among mortal men: ’m beautiful, too, extremely— granting all this, what then? the cause is beyond my ken. i blindly thus reply: “ suppose we were fated to be separated, assuredly i should die ! " oh, thine is the giving of dying or living ! i w onder, wonder why ? selene and ethais. _ _ . the cause beyond our ken, etc. a being of radiance rarer is the sun in his golden noon ; beyond comparison fairer the sheen of the silver moon. each is a god-sent boon, fairer than you or i- but when they’ve departed i’m not broken-hearted, aallen fairies, or, i neither despair nor die | the act of their setting i see without fretting— i wonder, wonder why ! selene and ethais. the cause is beyond our ken, etc. ethais. i’ll satisfy thy wonder in a word: the face is the true index to the heart- a ready formula whereby to read the morals of a mortal at a glance. selene. then, ethais, is perfect comeliness always identified with moral worth? ethais. the comeliest man is the most virtuous. that's an unfailing rule. selene. then, ethais, there is no holier man on earth than thou! take thou this ring—it is a pledge of love— [giving him a ring. wear it until thy love fades from thy soul. ethais. 'twill never fade while thou art true to me. selene (amazed). are women ever false to such as thou? ethais. are women ever true?—well, not to me! selene. but these are earthly maidens, ethais. my love is purer than a mortal's love. ethais. thine is no mortal love if it be pure. selene (horrified). then, mortal ethais, what love is thine? ethais. (taken back). i spake of women—men are otherwise ! selene. man's love is pure invariably ? ethais. pure ? pure as thine own | selene, poor trusting, cheated souls | song.—sir ethais. when a knight loves ladye– (hey, but a maid is a sorry little jade ) he sighs and he sings lackadaydy- hey, lackadaydy, o! of a love life-long he'll sing a song- (hey, but a sorry little jade ) of a love supre. he dreams a adaydy, o! t he. {wicked world. phyllon. well, it’s annoying ! darine (anriously). it is annoying? phyllon. yes, it’s annoying ! ensemble. these eyes-they burn for ethais, &c. phyllon. the state of your emotions you delineate succinctly : but, come—what would you have me do? tell me the truth distinctly. darine. do? hurl thyself to yonder earth, with sorrow unabated, and end a life from hour of birth to bitter anguish fated ! phyllon. i see your point, but (pardon me) _ did all heart-broken youths agree in death to drown their miseree, the world within a week would be depopnlated ! darine. depopulated ? phyllon. depopnlated ! exsnrrntn. pr-ryllou. danms. undoubtedly; but (pardon me) his difficulty i can see ; did all heart-broken youths agree did all heart-broken youths agree in death to drown their miseree, in death to drown their miseree, the world within a week would be the world within a week would be depopulated l depopulated ! [emit phyllon. darine (looking of). here comes the miserable, mincing jade, with a fair speech upon her lying lips, to meet the sister whom her evil arts have robbed of more than life. oh, hypocrite! enter semcee. selene. darine! darine (changing her manner). y sister-—my beloved one ! why, thou art sad; thine eyes are dim with tears. say, what has brought thee grief ? selene (with joy). darine, my own! thou dost not shun me, then ? darine. shun thee, my sweet selene ? n , not i ! selene. bless thee for that ! i feared to meet thy face, for all my loved companions turned from me with scornful jest and bitter mockery; thou, thou, darine, alone arttrue to me! darine. true to selene while selene breathes ! come, tell me all thy woes.‘ fallen fairies ; or, selene. my ethais— he whom i love so fondly—he is ill, and i am powerless to heal his wound ! darine, my love may die! darine (wildly). what can be done ? oh, i would give my fairyhood to save the man thou lovest, oh, my dearly loved ! but stay—the counterpart of lutin is at once his henchman and his cunning leech: lutin has gone to earth—cast thou this flower and summon mortal lutin to his aid ; he hath a charm to heal thy lover’s wound! selene. kind heaven reward thee for thy ready wit! my sister, thou hast saved both him and me— my darling sister! [embracing her. darine (aside). oh, thou hypocrite! selene. fair rose, i name thee lutin—go to earth and hither send the mortal counterpart of him whose name thou hast, and may kind heaven prosper thy mission ! kiss me, dear darine, for thou hast saved my ethais for me! [kisses her and exit. darine. n , not for thee, good sister—for myself! [emit deann:. hurried music. enter mortal lutin over the edge of the cloud, staggering on to the stage as though violently impelled from below. lutin (bewildered).' help ! help ! help ! whatever has become of me? help ! help! help ! wherever am i now? help! help ! help ! who’s made a tee-to-tum of me? when came i here, why came i here, whence came i here, and how ? uprising with velocity this impolite atrocity excites my curiosity- but stay, i’m coming to-— but stay, i’m coming to—- but stay, i’m coming to-— i’ve gained my senses ! i've died a death deplorable, for ever unrestorable, and left my wife adorable to weep, and pay my fu- to weep, and pay my fu- to weep, and pay my fu- neral expenses ! ha ! ha ! ila !‘ whatever has become of me? m‘. the wicked world. during this the fairies have entered, led by zayda, locrine, neome, fleta, and others. they emamine him curiously and with much amusement. zayda. a freak of nature-—not of art ! ’tis lutin, without wing ! f leta. his likeness to his counterpart is most astonishing! leila. how beautifully formed is he-- how delicately quaint ! zara. i wonder will he prove to be a sinner or a saint ? chorulv. we wonder will he prove to be a sinner or a saint? we lay no stress on blamelessncss, but still we wait to speculate on this—will he turn out to be a sinner or a saint ? lvtm (who has been much impressed with the beauty of the fairies). though i’m no mussulman, it’s true, yet by some strange device my soul has found its way into mahomet’s paradise ! if this is all i have to pay for my career perverse, it might have been, i‘m bound to say, considerably worse ! considering, i’ve had my fling, ’tis very well ; for, truth to tell, from what i glean, it might have been considerably worse l chorus. considering he’s had his fling, ’tis very well ; for, truth to tell, from what we glean, it might have been considerably worse ! [emit zeyoa. locrine (entering). why, this is lutin’s mortal counterpart! how quaint! how picturesquely rugged ! leila yes! such character and such expression ! fallen fairies; or, all (admiring him). lutin (with conviction). neodie. lutin. neodie. lutin. locrine. lutin. neodie. lutin. yes! it’s paradise! mahomet’s paradise! i’m comfortably dead, and all is well! alas! this is not paradise, nor art thou dead, thou art in fairyland! these are the clouds, and th ere’s the earth from which we summoned thee. of course! i recollect it all ! a mist enveloped me and whirled me safely here just as my fair but able-bodied wife ’ began to lay my staff about my ears. that’s all i know. i’m much obliged to it ! oh, tell me, are there many men on earth as fair and pleasant to the eye as thou ? not many—though i have met one or two who run me pretty close ! . tell us their names. well, let me see—sir phyllon has been thought a personable man ; then ethais—- he’s fairly well. but these are handsome men. we love thee for thy rugged, homely face ; oh, we are sated with mere comeliness, .we have so much of that up here! i love a homely face! i quite agree with you! what do a dozen handsome men imply ? a dozen faces, cast in the same mould. a dozen months, all lip for lip the same, a dozen noses, all of equal length. but take twelve plain men, and the element of picturesque variety steps in. you get at once unlo ked for hill and dale, odd curves and unexpected points of light, pleasant surprises, quaintly broken lines— 'all very charming, whether seen upon the face of nature or the face of man. song.—lutrn. suppose you take, with open mind, twelve handsome men—what do you find ? twelve people, twenty-five years old, twelve shapes, in even series ; twelve faces, cast in classic mould (a type that quickly wearies) ; the wicked world. twelve heads—the same from crown to nape, in tedious iteration ; twelve noses—a l alike in shape, without a variation ; two dozen cyes—all large and bright ; two dozen lips—all modelled quits like cupid’s bow——and underneath somewhere about three hundred teeth, by average calculation. this is a principle you may disseminate: good-looking men are effete and effemincte. as for variety, they haven’t got any—- morbidly mild in their mawky monotony ! but take twelve plain men, and you find variety of every kind ! you've eyes that swivel—eyes that squint, and dribbling eyes, and dozy; and mottled cheeks of every tint, and hair that’s red and rosy; you’ve months that grin and months that gape ; large ears that don’t ofiend us; uneven teeth grotesque in shape, and noses, too—tremendous ! y u’ve noses flat and noses snub, gigantic noses, noses club; you've noses long and noses short, and some that snore and some that snort with energy stupendous ! whk we're unpopular passes the wit ' me ! eac of his kind is a comic epitome, teeming with humours of dissimilarity-— quite a museum of peculiarity ! enter zayda unobserved. locrine. but stay! thou shouldst be faint for lack of food-— neodie. nay, let me minister unto his needs- zayda (coming forward). then go, beloved sisters. gather fruits and bring them here to him. such frugal fare will have a daintier flavour than its own when served by such fair hands ! [exeimt locaine, n eome, and the others. zayda, (changing her manner). we are alone! one word of cauti n—shun my sisters all ! lutin. are all these lovely girls your sisters? zayda all! rejoice that they are not thine own. lutin. i do. i very much prefer them as they are! you’re a fine family. fallen fa iries ; or, zayda. fair to the eye, but take good heed-—they are not what they seem! locrine, the fair-—the beautiful locrine— is the embodiment of avarice; darine is vain beyond comparison ; n eodie is much older than she looks ; camilla hath defective intellect; maia’s a bitter shrew, colombe’s a thief; and, last and worst of all, i blush to own, our queen selene hath a tongue that stabs— a traitor tongue that serves no better end than wag a woman’s character away ! lutin. l’ve stumbled into pretty company! it seems you fairies have your faults. zayda. alas! all but myself. my soul is in my face; i, only ', am what i seem to be; i, only i, am worthy of esteem. if thou wilt love me, i will dower thee with wealth untold, long years and happy life, thou gallant churl, thou highly favoured boor, thou pleasant knave, thou strange epitome of all tht’’ rugged, quaint, and picturesque! [kissing him on the tip of his nose. lutin. you don’t take long in coming to the point! zayda. forgive my clumsy and ill-chosen words ; we gentle, simple fairies never loved until to-day. lutin. and when you do begin, you fairies make up for the time you’ve lost !' [twelve fairies enter with fruit and wine. he sits and they group round him as he eats and drinks. neodie. hast thou a wife ? lutin. well, yes—that is down there! up here, i am a bachelor—as yet. cora. and does she love thee? lutin. w ell—we do fall out. we did to-day. neodie. and how came that about? lutin. why thus, to tell the‘ truth, between ourselves— ( whispering.) there was a lady in the case! ' zayda (much shocked). hush, hush ! such stories are unfit for maiden’s ears. confine thyself to matters that relate he wicked world. i to thine own sex. thy master ethais, he fought with phyllon. what was that about? lutin. oh, it's the old, old story! locrine. tell it ! lutin. well, there was a lady in the case ! zayda (shocked). then stop- go on to something else. where wast thou born? lutin. why in bulgaria—some years ago! (whispering.) there was a lady in that case ! zayda (severely). it seems there is a lady, sir, in every case ! lutin. in all those cases they do interfere! [exit zayda, offended. song.—lutin. in yonder world, which devils strew with worry, grief, and pain in plenty, this maxim is accounted true with nemine dissentiente : a woman doth the mischief brew in nineteen cases out of twenty chorus. a woman doth the mischief brew, in nineteen cases out of twenty ! in all the woes that joy displace, in all the blows that bring disgrace on much enduring human race, there is a lady in the case ! yes, that's the fix we have to face— her whims and tricks throughout you trace. in all the woes that curse our race there is a lady in the case. "horus. yes, that's the fix they have to face, etc. if woman from great nature's scheme were utterly eliminated, unruffled peace would reign supreme, no quarrels would be propagated. but that is a utopian dream of mortals unsophisticated. but that is a utopian dream of mortals unsophisticated ! palleav fairies, or, it's true that foes might then embrace, and earthly woes dissolve apace. but where would be the human race with never a lady in the case? yes, that's the rub we have to face— it gives a snub that kills the case. what would become of all our race with never a lady in the case? chorus. yes, that's the rub - that kills their case, etc. enter darine, unobserved. locrine. and, lutin, is thy wife as fair as thou? lutin. i thought her pretty till i looked on thee. zayda. her hair— lutin. is bright, but not as bright as thine. locrine. her figure? lutin. neat and graceful of its kind, but lacks thy pleasant plumpness. then besides she has a long, loud tongue, and uses it; a stout and heavy hand, and uses that; and large expressive eyes, and uses them! zayda. and doth she know that thou art here with us? lutin. no, that's the joke! zayda. the joke? lutin. of course it is | zayda. what joke? lutin. . . what joke? why this: my lovely wife is just as full of devil-born jealousy as woman's soul can hold! a pretty girl who comes within a hundred yards of me runs a fair chance to lose both eyes and hair! if i address a well-proportioned maid, my bones will ache for it a month at least! only the crooked, the palsied, and the blear are held to be fit company for me, and even they must mind their p's and q's. this comes of being quaintly picturesque! neodie (sighing). i understand—i'm not at all surprised. i should be just the same were i thy wife! locrine. and how's the lady called? fallen fairies .’ on, with all the madcap torrent of a soul that love has never kindled till to-day! lutin (aghast). thou lovest ethais? great heaven and earth! is the girl mad? darine. she is! mad as the moon! hast thou no pity for a heart-wrung girl who pines for love that thou canst help her win? lutin. she must be mad! oh, my beloved darine! [throwing himself at her feet. don’t break my heart—don’t make my life a curse! i’ve been a faithful husband——m re or less! and when ’ve earned a hearty cudgelling as i have, now and then, i’ve borne it meekly! oh, darine, my love, do not forsake me. treat me as thou wilt, i will bear all. be thou but true to me, my masterful but well-beloved wife! [wee in . darine (astonished). p g i am thy wife? thy well-beloved wife ? lutin. of course! darine. oh monstrous! (suddenlg) stay! there has been mistake; some dreadful error! see, i’ve found the clue! her name’s darine. here, set thy mind at rest—- no doubt i am her fairy prototype ! lutin (sobbing). her prototype? and what’s a prototype? darine. why, all the mortals on that wicked world have prototypes up here, and i am hers- in face resembling her, and that is all. lutin. then you are not my wife? darine. not i indeed ! lutin. you’re sure of that ? darine. quite sure! lutin (embracing her rapturously). my darling girl! and i’m permitted to disport myself with these fair maids? darine. undoubtedly you are! latin. kiss me again ! [embracing her and giving her the phial. . here—take the phialf two spoonsful to the dose! i never was so happy in my life! [emit dabine triumphantly. the wicked world. song..—lutin. when husband supposes his wife is a jade, n o bed of red roses for husband is made ; but when he discovers, his fears about lovers so grimly abhorrent are quite without warrant, with utter contrition he sends to perdition all silly suspicion- his fears are allayed ; " he, (dancing.) free from anxiety, free from timidity, ladies’ society seeks with avidity-— pleasant variety, perfect sobriety, no impropriety or insipidity ! fairies (dancing). free from anxiety, free from timidity, etc. lutin. with keen satisfaction and sense of relief he feels a reaction from trouble and grief. his fears heavy-hearted have uickly departed. he see s in enjoyment congenial employment, surrenders politely to maidens so sprightly, they’re all very sightly, but this is the chief! (indicating locrine.) oh ! (dancing) pure informality marks their civility— lovely locality, gems of gentility— happy fatality ! that it’s finality seems, in reality, improbahility ! fairies (dancing). pure informality marks our civility, etc. [the fairies dance of with lrrrin. as they go of, darrse enters. iv. q aalleav fairies; or, song.—darine. triumphant i | here is the charm || now to devise a plan to gain my end: if i restore his strong sword arm, he will become my friend. but will it gain the love that i prize all above? that all-enthralling love which i would fain yield up my very fairyhood to gain! and how shall i attain that dream oh, god of impudence, lend me thine art ! i have bethought me of a scheme that should enchain his heart! no matter sin or shame so, i fulfil my aim— the dictates of the heart must be obeyed. so, god of impudence, lend me thine aid : enter ethais from bower. he is very weak and ill. darine (tenderly). how fares sir ethais? ethais. why grievously! i am no leech and cannot dress my wound. i'm sick and faint from pain and loss of blood | idarine (aside). now for my plan! (aloud) sir ethais, if phyllon's words be true, thy wound is but a scratch! ethais (indignantly). a scratch, forsooth ! the devil's claws could scarcely scratch as deep ! darine. he says—i don’t believe him—but he says that thou hast magnified its character because thou fearest to renew the fight! he says thou art a coward | ethais (furiously). by my blood he shall atone for this! oh, phyllon, coward! why, a dozen times we two have fought our battles side by side, and i’m to quail and blanch, forsooth, because we two at last are fighting face to face! black curses on this wound! were lutin here, my sword arm soon would be in gear again! darine, lutin is here! . ethais (amazed). her n > darine, behold! [shows phia?. i have obtained charm from him. now, knigh nettle ! . the wicked world. ethais (furiously). give it me! give me the flask | darine. one moment, ethais ! this flask is precious, and it hath a price! ethais. name thou thy price, and i will give it thee— take money, jewels, armour, all i have so that thou leavest me one trusty sword darine. nay, ethais, i do not want thy wealth; i want thy love—yes, ethais, thy love! that priceless love that thou hast lavished on my worthless sister ! ethais. on selene? darine. aye, thou lovest her, and dost thou think that i will save thy life for her? ethais. selene? bah! true, she is fair. well, thou art also fair. what does it matter, her fair face or thine? what matters either face, or hers or thine, when weighed against this outrage on my honour? darine. give me that ring, and thou shalt have the charm ethais. 'tis thine. [gives ring and receives phial. and now, sir phyllon, take good heed ! [swallows contents of phial and is at once restored to health and vigour. enter sir phyllon. phyllon. why, ethais— ethais (furiously). so i'm a cur, sir liar, and my wound is but a scratch that i have magnified that i might shun the terrors of thy sword! phyllon. hands off, thou drunken madman | set me free! i never said these things! ethais. thou craven cur! dost thou then fear to reap before my face the crop that thou hast sown behind my back? phyllon (contemptuously). i am not wont to weigh the words i speak to such as thou! no need to taint thine honour with a lie; why, ethais, the truth is black enough ! i know thee for a brawling tavern-bully, a hollow friend, a cruel unsparing foe, fallen fairies; or, a reckless perjurer, a reprobate, the curse of women and the scourge of men-— is not the truth enough, that i should grudge the one brute-virtue of thy satyr-soul- the instinct courage of a hungry dog? " r [ethars is about to fly at peyrmon, but checks himself and turns to darine. ethais. didst thou not tell me he had said these things ? darine. ’twas but an artifice to gain thy love! [turns to phyllon. forgive me, phyllon ! phyllon. bah! release my hand- thou shameless woman, i have done with thee! [emit phyllon. darine turns to ethais imploringly. enter selene. selene. darine! thou here alone with ethais ? no, n —i will not doubt! darine. doubt whom thou wilt, thou hypocrite! thou shameless hypocrite! thou craven victim of thine own designs! enter all the fairies. selene. darine, what dost thou mean ? darine. doubt all of us, for we are false to thee, as thou to us. i am as thou hast made me, hypocrite! selene. thou art to me as thou hast ever been, most dearly loved of all these dearly loved! darine. away! thou art the source of all our ill. zayda. oh, miserable woman, get thee hence! thou art no queen of ours! darine. away with her! down with the traitress queen! . sceru. darine. thou art the source of all the ill that blights our fairyland! zayda. thine is the impious hand that worked our misery, until the very air we breathe was made to reek and seethe wit the accursed ofience of plague and pestilence ! the wicated world. darine. bow thee unto the storm that lowers | away! thou art no queen of ours! all. away, thou art no queen of ours : give place to our darine ! bow thee unto the storm that lowers : down with the traitress queen zayda. 'tis true we counselled thee to call these mortals here from earth. 'twas but to test thy worth ! we knew too well that thou wouldst fall, as thou indeed hast done. thy subjects every one thine infamy has seen, thou sorry, sorry queen : darine, zayda, locrine, and neodie. thou hast abused thy royal powers : away! thou art no queen of ours : all. away! thou art no queen of ours! give place to our darine ! bow thee before the storm that lowers | down with the traitress queen selene. so let it be, for i have proved unfit ! - i had a trust—i have forsaken it ! all. down with the traitress queen selene. though my default was born of good intent, mine was the sin, be mine the punishment ! all. hail to our loved darine ! selene, bows in remorse the head that ye contemn. [taking off her crown and placing it on dabine. well loved darine, wear thou this diadem all. down with the traitress queen! selene. see, my beloved sister-maidens, how imperially it rests upon her brow ! all, hail to our loved darine ! thou art our queen, beloved darine ! in loyalty we bow to thee--- we bow to thee in loyalty, beloved darine, henceforth our queen [the fairies march round darine and make obeisance to her. darine. so may i fall if i forsake my trust ! thy punishment is just. thou wast a queen what art thou now 'elene. i have a kingdom yet! i have a kingdom here in ethais' heart. a kingdom? nay, a world—my world-my w. = fallen fairies ,' or, a world where all is pure and good and brave—- a world of noble thought and noble deed- a world of brave and gentle chivalry- a very goodly and right gallant world ! this is my kingdom, for i am its queen! [turning to etha s, who comes down. darine. thou art no queen of his, for he is mine; aye, by the token that thou gavest him, thou fond and foolish maiden! [showing ring. selene (looking at it). n , no, no ! it is a counterfeit! no, no, darine ! the punishments of heaven are merciful! [takes ethals’ hand to kiss it; she sees that the ring is not there. oh, ethais! is that the ring with which i plighted thee ? ethais (sullenly). aye, that’s the bauble. i have naught to say! selene (to darine>. it fell from him! where didst thou find it ? speak ! ethais. i sold it for a charm, that i might have an arm to flog a lying cur withal; a traitor devil, whose false breath had blurred my knightly honour—dearer to my heart than any love of woman, hers or thine! i had no choice, my honour was at stake! selene. thine honour ! thou dost well to speak of that! can devils take the ‘face and form of gods ? are truth and treachery so near akin that one can wear the other’s countenance ? are all such men as thou? or art thou not of thine accursed race the most accursed? why, honourable sir, thou art a knight who wars with womankind! thy panoply a goodly form, smooth tongue, and fair, false face; thy shield a lie, thy weapon an embrace. the emblem of thy skill a broken heart! thine is a gallant calling, ethais ! thou manly knight—this soul of chivalry—- thou most discreet and prudent warrior! [he approaches her. away, and touch me not! my nature’s gone! may heaven rain down her fury on thy soul! __. may every fibre in that perjured heart quiver with love for one who loves thee not! the wicked world. ethais. selene. ethais. selene. may thine untrammeled soul at last be caught and fixed and chained and riveted to one who, with the love of heaven upon her lips, carries the hate of hell within her heart! stay! hear me out. 'tis true i trifled with thy love, but then thy love is not as mortal woman’s love. i did not know that it would move thee thus! thou didst not know ! art thou so dull that thou canst understand no pain that is not wreaked upon thy frame? hast thou no knowledge of the form of woe that comes of cheated hopes and trampled hearts? nay, hear me. i have wronged thee bitterly; i will atone for all thou shalt atone. song.—selene. hark ye, sir knight. i'll yield my fairy state, that i may follow thee to yonder earth, and join the whispering band of hidden hate who feed on falsehood and who war with worth; the '' band who stab in secrecy; the blighting band within whose lips is hung the deadliest weapon of earth's armoury ! a woman's tongue—a woman's blighting tongue! the talisman i will so deftly wield to twist and turn and torture good to ill, that, were it in thy traitor heart to yield to holy deeds of peace and calm goodwill, those deeds should seem of holiness bereft, from every form of righteousness averse— thy peace a war—thy charity a theft— thy calm a fury and thy prayer a curse! [she throws herself on a bank exhausted. enter locrine. locrine. selene, see!. through the far distant air with rapid flight our absent brothers wing their way to us! these mortals must return to our own earth ! zayda and lutin and other fairies have entered. lutin (shaking them off). zayda now, by my head, but this is welcome news! (horrified). - return to earth? no, lutin, no—not yet! life without lutin, what can that be worth? falleiv fairies; or, luti‘w i cannot tell you, for i never tried. nay, seek not to detain me, i’ve reformed ! and had i not, i don’t think i could much enjoy myself in the distracting company of one who, if she’s not in point of fact my wife, [alluding to darine. ls so uncomfortably like my wife that she may be my wife for aught i know! enter phyllon. phyllon. come, ethais, lutin, come, to earth again! [pi-iyllon descends with lutin. selene. ethais is about to follow them, but , detained by selene. n , no! thou shalt not go—thou shalt not go! my hope—my shattered hope, but still my hope! my love—my blighted love, but still my love ! my life—my ruined life, but still my life! i’ll work and toil for thee—i’ll be thy slave-— thine humble, silent, and submissive slave! ( 'uri usly.) - nay, but i’ll hold thee back ! i have the strength of fifty women! see, thou canst not go! ( with passionate triumph.) ethais. [throws of selena. nay, but i’ll wrest thy love away from thee and fetter it in bondage to my heart! i will be one with thee; ’ l cling to thee and thou shalt take me to that world of thine ! take thee to earth ? i love the world too well to curse it with another termagant ! we have enough of them. release me, fool- away from me ! i go to that good world where women are not devils till they die! selene, who falls senseless. he leaps through the cloud and descends. as ethais dis- appears the fairies, who have grouped themselves about the stage in attitudes of despair, appear gradually to wake as from a dream. the moon has disappeared, heavy thunderclouds that have gradu- ally gathered during the preceding scene suddenly disperse, the stage grows light, and the music becomes soft and lzyrnn-like. where am i? zayda ! n eodie! darine! oh, sisters, i am waking from a dream_-<- the wicked world. zayda. selene. a fearful dream—a dream of evil thoughts, of mortal passion and of mortal hate ! i thought that.ethais and phyllon had gone to mid—earth— nay, it was no drezm— a sad and sorrowful reality! yes, we have suffered much, but, heaven be praised, these mortal men have gone to their own earth and taken with them the bad influence that spread like an infection through our ranks. see, we are as we were! embracing her. darine ! arine ! my well-beloved sister, speak to me! darine (shamefacedly). selene. i dare not speak to thee—i have no words—- i am ashamed! oh, sister, let that shame hang heavily on all, for all have sinned! oh, let us lay this lesson to our hearts ! let us achieve our work with humbled souls, free from the folly of self-righteousness. behold, is there so wide a gulf between the humbled wretch who, being tempted, falls, and that good man who rears an honoured head because temptation has not come to him? shall we, from our enforced security deal mercilessly with poor mortal man, who struggles, single-handed, to defend the demon-leaguered fortress of his soul ? shall we not rather, seeing how we fell, give double honour to the champion who throughout his mortal peril holds his own, e’en though his walls be somewhat battered in the fight? oh, let us lay this lesson to our hearts! enter luti n followed by etuzus and phyllon as fairies. lutin. selene. ithais. your brothers have returned ! my ethais ! selene-—sisters all-—rejoiee with us! \ve bear the promise of a priceless gift, a source of new and endless happiness! take every radiant blessing that adorns our happy land, and all will pale before fallen fairies; or the wicked world. the lustre of this precious privilege. it is—that we may love as mortals love selene. no, no—not that! no, ethais, not that ! it is a deadly snare—beware of it! such love is for mankind and not for us. no, ethais, we will not have this love chorus. pure as the air, sweet as the morning dew, reigneth our queen! bright in our eyes as heaven's ethereal blue, reigneth our queen! spirit of love as thou hast ever been, be to us evermore, oh, sister-queen unsullied source of tranquil joy, pursue thy course of pure employ– be thou as thou hast ever been, our all-beloved sister-queen | [darine removes the crown from her head and places it on selene. the fairies all kneel in adoration at selene's feet. curtain. the gentleman in black. a musical play. written by w. s. gilbert. composed by frederic clay, dramatis personae. the baron otto von schlacabnstein mr. danvers. grumpff, his steward •- •- ... mr. terrott. hans gopp, a villager - •- ... miss e. fowler. the gentleman in black •- ... mr. flockton. tintelstein, syndic of schlachenschloss ... mr. f. robson. schlipps, an innkeeper •- •- ... mr. herbert. bertha... - •- - - - - ... miss emmeline cole. the baroness won schlachenstein ... miss maxse. maria • *- ... miss dalton. al - - - gretchen } market airls. { • * * ... miss roberts, emma ... - - • *- •- .., miss wilson. act i. market place of a german willage. act ii. gates of castle schlachenschloss. time in representation: one hour and a half. costumes-date about , th e gentleman in black. act i. sceni .—lllarket place of a german village. the golden flagon inn at back of stage. the s /ndic’s house, r. chorus of market girls, assembled in honour o_/'bertha’s betrothal to heus. ornnmc cnonus. to-day young hans matures his plans, and pretty bertha gratifies his whim. some men prefer a girl like her, but girls should not endure a man like him. an ugly chap not worth a rep, he’s very far from bright; not over tall. my future spouse must have a house- a cow as well, and several pigs withal ! hans enters r. u. e. and is received by them with some ridicule. he is a heavy, simple, idiotic fellow, but good-looking and honest. maria. well, hans, so you are really going to be married at ast ? hans. we l, yes, it looks like it, don’t it? (c'huckles.) but i've had a great deal of trouble to get bertha to consent. first she would, and then she wouldn’t—and then she couldn’t—and then she shouldn't--and then she’d think of it—and then she thought of it, and then she seemed to like it—and then she thought of it again, and then she didn’t seem to like it—then she thought she might do worse, and then she was sure that the gentleman in black. she might do better—and when she found that no opportunity of doing better presented itself, why she closed with me, and here we are! . [c/zuckles. gretchen. ah, it was a sad day for us, hans, when bertha consented. what’s to become of us now, i should like to know? we shall all die old maids ! hans. well, i could only have prevented that in one case, if bertha hadn’t consented. that is to say, in one case at a time! maria. yes, but who knows but that that case might have been mine ? _ hans. no, it wouldn’t have been yours-—i’m sure it wouldn’t have been yours. i never liked you much. [chuckles . gretchen. mine, then? hans. no. you’re a very good girl, gretchen, but you’re not clever. come, you know you’re not clever. now my wife must be very clever. gretchen (angry). yes, she must have cleverness enough for two! hans. yes, or she’d never catch me! [chuckles . gretchen. if she were clever she wouldn’t want to catch ou. y hans. that carries out what i told you just now. you wanted to catch me. gretchen. i didn’t. hans. well, you said you did. gretchen.. ah, you mustn’t believe all i say. hans. so i’m told. gretchen. do you mean to say people tell you that i tell stories? hans. oh, no, not exactly stories, that’s not the word. gretchen. what is the word, then ? hans. lies! [c’huckles. gretchen. abominable! i’ll pay you out for this, hans. i’ll give a party on our wedding-day, and invite all the young men. bertha will be disconsolate. hans. oh, bertha won’t mind. she isn’t selfish, and she knows you want ’em more than she does. maria. there’s a good deal of truth in that. gretchen. is there? i disagree with you. maria. yes, dear; you’re like a strasburg sausage, you dis- agree with everybody. as for the truth, i don’t believe you know it when you hear it. gretchen. i don’t often get the chance in this village! maria. no, your t ngue’s always going! the geav 'lemaav iaw black. enter schlipps, from the golden flagon, in great terror. he shuts the door after him, and puts his back against it. theresa. what's the matter? schlipps. i’m a weak man and a good man, and there's a strong man and a bad man coming after me. emma. a strong man and a bad man? whom in the world do you mean? schlipps. a mysterious stranger ! a person who has no right up here, on earth, i know. he's a supernatural person, my dears, and he dines off iron pokers and lumps of coal. he called for his dinner just now, and i sent it up to him—a beautiful roast turkey stuffed with chestnuts—well, he never touched the turkey, but he eat all the knives and forks! emma. eat the knives and forks! schlipps. yes, all of 'em, and then called for more! and when i said i hadn't got any more, he tried to collar me, but i escaped, and here i am. i’ll go to the priest and the syndic, and between them they’ll make the place too hot to hold him. that is, if any place can be too hot to hold such a person. i believe the hotter it is, the better he likes it! (noise heard.) here he comes! help me to hold the door! [all the girls run to the inn, and assist schlipps in keeping the door shut. the gentleman in black walks quietly through the wall of the inn at a considerable distance from the door that the girls are barring. he is eating a fork. he walks quietly down the stage, and addresses schlipps, who is quite hemmed in by girls round the door. gentle. schlipps, i don’t think your wife would like that. [schlipps leans against the wall in great terror. hans (chuckling). he hasn’t got a wife! gentle. oh yes, he has. a tall, stout wife, with yellow hair and freckles. haven't you, schlipps? (girls all recoil from schlipps in great horror.) her name's martha, isn't it, schlipps? and she has a fine, strong arm, hasn't she, schlipps? and she uses it, don’t she, schlipps? schlipps. well, my wife's neither here nor there. gentle. yes, she is, she's there, [points off r, schlipps. where? - gentle. nuremberg. [schlipps runs off in the opposite direct "aria. how do you know that tle. i know everything. the ge./vtlemaiv in black. gretchen. i don’t believe you. gentle. why should you? nobody believes you. gretchen. how do you know that? i mean, how dare you say such a thing? theresa. gretchen may be a story-teller—but she has her good points for all that. she says so herself. gretchen. i never said so. maria. then it may be true. (to gentleman.) now tell me something about myself. gentle. very good. that’s not your own hair. [touching a long plait that hangs down her back. maria (in a great rage). it’s false! gentle. exactly. [it comes of in his hand; all laugh. thebesa,gret hen, and emma, quietly take of their plaits and put them in their pockets. maria (indignantly). give me that directly. (snatohes it away.) my hair always comes off in the autumn. gretchen. perhaps you have some remark to make about my hair. gentle. yes, beautiful hair, and all your own. (pulling end of long plait quietly out of gretonen’s pocket.) with a reserve, to be used in cases of emergency. gretchen. i won’t stand it. my mind’s made up! maria. so‘s your face! [garrtonen and maria retire up, quarrelling. emma. n ow tell us something that’s going to happen. gentle. very good. you’ve heard of the wicked baron otto von schlachenstein ? all. yes, yes. gentle. well, he’s going to happen! he’ll be here to-day on his way to his native castle, schlachenschloss—twenty miles from here. _ hans. and who’s baron otto von schlachenstein ? maria, the wickedest man in the whole world! gretchen. yes, but there’s something worse than that about him, he’s the ugliest man in the whole world! - emma. he’s the most dreadful rake in the whole world! maria. yes, they say that although he’s so wonderfully hideous, no woman can possibly resist him. it’s infamous that any man should possess such power. emma. disgracefull theresa. abominable! _ gretchen. yes, they say he only has to look at you, and there’s an end of you! the gentleman in black hans (simply). of me? gretchen. not of you, of course, of me—.(./ill laugh)—that is, of any woman. it’s abominable ! well, he’ll be here in half an hour! all the girls. oh, how nice ! [they check themselves and look demure. hans. oh, dear! oh, dear! [crying_ maria. what on eath is there to cry about? hans. suppose he takes a fancy to my bertha? do you think she would resist him? gretchen. i don’t know any girl with weaker powers of resist- ing temptation. enter bertha running, l. u. ., as _ f pursued. rncrnr vn. bertha. oh, my gracious ! all. what’s the matter ? bertha. how audacious ! all. what a clatter. bertha. such a monster! hans. oh, how frightful ! bertha. tried to kiss me. all. how delightful ! bertha. then he chased me. all. how audacious ! bertha. and embraced me. . all. yet how gracious ! maria. tell us, bertha, what befell you— ' bertha. gar.her round, and i will tell you. listen. (sees haes.) no! hans. bertha, what in the world is the matter ‘? who’s been hitting you? " bertha (coquettishly). i haven’t been hit, i’ve been struck ! hans. struck! bertha. very much struck ! hans. bertha, you’ve been flirting. bertha. no, i haven’t. (demurelg/.) i’ve been receiving attention from a gentleman. . hans. from what gentleman ? -- bertha. from—well, i shan’t tell you. [hans, in despair. air.-—berti-ia. on second thoughts, i don’t suppose it matters much to you- your conduct very plainly shows you do not think me true. v. the gentleman in black. why, i declare, you tear your hair, because he touched his hat! if noble strangers think me fair, i’m not to blame for that! chorus. if noble strangers think her fair, she's not to blame for that ! if my complexion shames the rose, i didn't put it there ! i don’t suppose i made my nose, although i “ did my hair.” if noble strangers choose to think i’m good for looking at- and feel themselves compelled to wink, am i to blame for that? chorus. if noble strangers choose to wink, she’s not to blame for that ! maria. did he only wink ? ' bertha. oh, he did more than that—he put his arm round my waist and kissed me. hans. but you resisted? bertha. i couldn’t resist! hans (sulkily). you can sometimes ! bertha. yes, but he’s much stronger than you. gretchen. is he handsome? bertha. he’s the ugliest man i ever saw. hans. then you've no excuse! bertha. his hair is a fiery red, and his nose is diabolical; he has little green eyes, and his face is covered with moles like little hat-pegs. hans. if she goes on like this with a man whose face is covered with moles like little hat-pegs, how far will she go with a man who hasn’t got any moles at all? bertha. some girls choose men as they choose old china—the uglier they are the better they like them. hans. i wish i was like old china. bertha. so you are in one respcct—you‘re very much cracked! but although he is so dreadfully ugly, there’s some- thing very striking about his head. hans. there shall be something very striking about his head before he’s half an hour older! why what’s the matter with the syndic ? enter tintelsrein, l. u. e. tintel. congratulate me, congratulate me. hans. we do—heartily. why ? tintel. at last i have an ofiicial duty to discharge. for the gentle./van in black’. three years i have been syndic of schlachenschloss, and until this moment my office has been a sinecure. not a nobleman has visited the village—not a quarrel has taken place between the villagers. my term of ofiice expires in a month, and but for a glorious and wholly unexpected event which has just taken place, posterity would never have heard of me! the baron otto von schlachenstein has just arrived on his way to his native castle, schlachenschloss. all. the baron otto von schlachenstein! bertha. that was his name. hans. whose ? bertha. the man who tried to kiss me! fly, fly, girls, or he may try to kiss you too, for pretty and ugly are alike to him. _ gretchen. fly? we’d scorn the action. if innocence is to be insulted, flying won’t do any good. maria. i should like to catch him trying to kiss me! tintel. well, from all accounts you’re very likely to have your whim gratified. but don’t talk of flying-—-— gretchen. we are not talking of flying. tintel. because so great a man must be received with cor‘- mony. i must go and put on my robes! when i took office i spent thirty thalers on those robes, and from that day to this i’ve never had an opportunity of wearing them. gretchen. and won’t you speak an address ? tlntel. an address? i should rather think so! listen, when the empress was expected to pass through this village three years since, shortly after the birth of her two s ns—twins —i prepared a speech and had it engrossed on vellum. well, the empress changed her mind and never came, so the address was never used. that speech shall be spoken now! with a little modification it will do admirably. here comes the baron, attended by his steward grumpff. receive him with the enthusiasm so great a man deserves-—i won’t be a minute! come along, hans, and help me with my robes. [erit into his house :., followed by hans. enter baron and gnumrrr, l. u. e. cnonus. we hail you—- regale you— the flagon shall not fail you ! amuse you, and booze you—- there‘s nought we can refuse you. the geavtleman in blaca. baron. grumpff. grumpff. my lord. baron. did you flog that postillion who had the audacity to faint on his horse ? grumpff. my lord, i flogged him till i couldn't stand. baron. my own grumpff! grumpff, i love you. you're a man after my own heart. grumpff. no, no, my lord. baron. but i say yes. grumpff. i say no! baron. potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal i shall say yes! - grumpff. hier sprich mann schloppenhausen teufelspitz, i say no! because—because—your lordship hasn’t a heart to "be after—ho, ho, ho! baron. ho, ho, ho! couplets. baron (to maria). how de do, miss | who are you? who are you? who are you? you who smile with wicked wile, how de do, miss! who are you? glad to see you—who are you? maria. my name's maria, i am she who shells the coy and bashful pea. supplies the priest, and syndic, too— happy to do the same for you! baron (to gretchen). how de do, miss! who are you? who are you? who are you? you with waist so tightly laced, how de do, miss! who are you? glad to see you—who are you? gretch. my name is gretchen; i'm the pride and boast of all the country side; i flirt all day—that's all i do— happy to do the same with you! baron (to theresa). how de do, miss! who are you? who are you? who are you ? - you with hair so long and f how de do, miss | who - glad to see you—who a theresa. my name's theresa grapes, and nuts, an well, the villagers i sel happy to do the ' he gentlemazv in black. : baron (to bertha). how de do, miss ! who are you ? who are you? who are you? you whose lips the rose eclipse-— how de do, miss ! who are you? glad to see you ? who are you ? bertha. my name is bertha, i’m the miss you complimented with a kiss. you gave me one—a good one, me—- happy to do the same to you ! enter tintelstein from house, r., with address. tintel. welcome, my lord! here is a small matter of an address, which i trust your lordship will condescend to hear. it is an address composed in honour of the expected visit of the empress immediately after the birth of her little twins, but the empress never came, and it’s on my hands. but it has never been used, my lord, and is as good as new, and if your lordship will make a slight allowance for the different circumstances under which the address is presented, i think you will find that it will answer every purpose. ahem ! (reads) “ much respected and ever to be worshipped madame ! ” baron. eh ? potz-tausend aimmels sackerment noch emmal! what’s that? tintel. that referred to the empress. “ we, the syndic of schlachenschloss, dazzled by the surpassing beauty of your angelic countenance—overwhelmed by the extraordinary lustre of those melting eyes? ” grumpfl’. that’s the empress’s eyes. baron. it applies equally to our own. proceed. tintel. it applies equally to his lordship’s. i proceed. “ those melting eyes, find ourselves quite unable to congratulate you, in fitting terms, on your happy recovery ” baron. recovery? tintel. that referred to an interesting event of a certain kind, which had recently occurred. but perhaps your lordship has been ill lately? baron. not at all-—never had a day’s illness in all my life. . _ _'intel. i’i very sorry to hear you say so, my lord, for as the particular kind of illness from which the empress was recovering isn’t specified,i was in hopes that it might have applied to you. but i’ll strike that out. i proceed. “ we are happy to think that the cares of maternity do not so monopolise your attention as to prevent your honouring us with a visit——- ” grumpfl. bah! . the gentleman in black baron. that’s all right. the cares of maternity do not monopolise our attention—it’s quite right. go on. tintel. exactly; in the empress’s case they did, and she never came. “and in the devout hope that these interesting little strangers may only be the earnest of many many more interesting little strangers to follow, we beg to subscribe our- selves, madame, your most obedient and very humble servant, tintelstein, syndic.” i composed that myself! baron. potz-tausend ! but it does you credit. tintel. allowing, your lordship, for the altered circumstances, i think? ' baron. exactly—get out. this is a pleasant village, grumpff ; i shall stop here a fortnight. . grumpfl’. your lordship might do worse. . baron. which is the prettiest girl in the village? gmmpfi’. this one, my lord. [indicating bertha. baron. good, grumpff! are you the prettiest girl in the village? bertha. i believe i am considered so, my lord. baron. what’s your name? bertha. bertha pompopplesdorf, my lord. hans. at present, my lord. baron. eh ? hans. to-morrow she changes it. _ baron. exactly—to-morrow she changes it-—syndic. tintel. my lord. baron. draw up a marriage contract between ‘bertha pom- popplesdorf and baron otto von schlachenstein. hans. here, i say—— tintel. but, my lord—-— _ baron (in a rage). potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal! am i to be thwarted ? hans. you are! baron. potz-tausend himmel sackerment ‘noch emmal! hans. she’s betrothed to me, and we’re to be married to- morrow. baron. how blind are these poor earthworms! they design, and lo, they think they have completed! potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal! bertha (aside). it will serve the jealous little donkey right to tease him for half an hour. (aloud) baron, it is true that i am betrothed to hans, in a sort of way—bl t—to be a baroness hans. to be a baroness! but look at his moles! you couldn’t marry a man with moles like hat-pegs! . the ge/vtle.ma v in black. bertha. one can but try, dear hans. if i find i can’t marry him, i will marry you with pleasure-—there! come, baron, and we will talk it over ! [repeat chorus, “ we hail you.” all emerunt l. u. e., emcept huts and the gentleman in black. hans. that girl’s going to throw me over! life without bertha, one long, long night ! gentle. (coming forward). and life with bertha? hans. one long, long day! gentle. you’d find one as monotonous as the other. but what is the matter? hans. matter? bertha has been and bolted bodily with a big, brutal, burly baron! 'i‘hat’s all. [s bln'ng. gentle. well? hans. that’s what it is to be a baron. rank is a fine thing! ugly as he is, i wish i was he ! gentle. do you mean that? hans. of course i mean that. gentle. good. are you aware that i have power of trans- ferring the soul of one man into the body of another at will. hans (terrified). no! gentle. it’s a fact,'though. i can accomplish that meta- morphosis whenever i please. at the end of the month your soul goes back to its proper body. hans. and who are you? gentle. the king of the gnomes. country orders executed with promptness and despatch. hans. and if my soul is transferred to the baron’s body, shall i become as wicked as the baron? gentle. that depends entirely upon youself ; you carry with you all your moral qualities, and, subject to them, you are a free agent. hans. and bertha won’t know anything about it? gentle. certainly not. she will notice a curious change in the baron’s voice and manner, and that’s all. hans. it will be a change for the better. (c/zuckles.) i agree. go it. gentle. go what? hans. change me. gentle. oh, but i must get the baron’s consent first. hans. why? gentle. why, if i- take your soul out of your body, without finding room for it in the baron’s, you will be what is called “ dead.” you may have heard the term ? hans. i think i have. the ge./vtleman in black gentle. good—then you know what i mean. ah, here he comes. enter baron, l. u. :. baron. potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal l she don’t care a bit for me! she loves that booby after all ! she only did it to tease him ! gentle. how do you do, baron? baron. who are you, sir, when you’re at home ? gentle. never mind who i am when i’m at h me—you’ll find out all about that some day. it is enough for you that i wish to be known as the gentleman in black. come, you have fallen desperately in love with bertha pompopplesdorf ; she flirted with you in order to excite her lover’s jealousy, and having done that she allowed you to see that she didn’t care a straw about you. you are at this moment wishing you were that lover—true ? baron (amazed). quite true! gentle. i have the power of transferring your soul into his body for one calendar month—at the end of the month your soul lievertps to its original tabernacle. what do you say ? shall i it. . ba/ron. for one month only. gentle. only for one month. this is the thirteemli august, , on the thirteenth september your souls will revert to their proper bodies. baron. agreed. go it. gentle. very good. behold—i go it! rncrtatrve. otto's body, grim and rlroll, shrine young hans’s simple soul ; otto’s soul, of moral shoddy, occupy young hans’s body ! [he makes passes, and flashes fire. hans immediately assumes the ferocious demeanour of the baron—the baron assumes the loutish demeanour of hans. . n.b.—for the salsa of convenience, hans’s body with — the bar n’s soul will be distinguished as the “ false hans,” the baron’s body with hans’s soul as the “real hans.” gentle. there, it’s done ! how do you like it? false hans. potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal ! this is a tight fit ! _ real hans (chuckles as hans did——l oking in mirror). what an ugly brute i am ! " the geivtleman ./v black. false ha/ns (indignantly). potz-tausend! what do you mean by that? you’re a devilish good-looking fellow, sir. look at me! here’s a sight ! and i’ve got to go about like this for a month—and in these clothes, to)! potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal! [pulls at cloth of his coat. real hans; i say, baron, don’t do that—that’s my best doublet, and it won’t stand trifling with. by the bye, where do you keep your pocket handkerchief? oh, i’ve got it (uses it—- a letter drops out of his pocket). hallo! what’s this? (reads) “ dearest otto———” false hans. give me that letter, sir, immediately. real hans. oh, no—excuse me. false hans. it’s from a lady, sir. potz-tausend! real hans. can’t help that. (ohuekies.) you should have emptied your pockets before you changed. . false hans (feeling in pocket, and producing bread and sausage). yvhat’s this? real hans. 'ha’hs my dinner—at least, your dinner. you have meat for dinner to-day to commemorate your betrothal. you’re in luck, baron! [ 'huekles. false hans. bread and sausage for a month ! (enter bnwrha.) potz-tauseud, but she's a lovely girl and i’ll bear with the inconveniences of my position for her sake! real hans. bertha ! [runs to embrace her. bertha. go away, you monster, i hate the sight of you. (to false hans.) hans, i’m very sorry i treated you so badly, but it was because you were so ridiculous as to be jealous of that extravagant scarecrow! as if any girl could love a monster with moles like hat-pegs. false hans. h’m ! his body isn’t so_ bad, bertha, but his moral qualities are contemptible. real hans. bah! i’m the ugliest beast on the face of the earth ! false hans. you’re not, sir! real hans. i am, sir! false hans. look at your nose, sir. 'l‘here’s a nose! there’s character in that nose, sir! there’s blood in that nose, sir! 'i‘here’s an eye, sir! there’s a sonnet in every look-—there’s a leg ! potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal ! real hans (feeling his legs). hallo! it’s padded. (c'huel.'.les.) here’s a lark ! oh, i say, he pads his legs! false hans. it’s all stuff ! bertha. well, well, don’t quarrel. it’s quite enough for you, dear hans (to false hans) that i think him repulsive. i’ve come to beg your pardon for flirting with such a monster and to the gentleman in black. tell you that a ready to marry you immediately, and be a good and faithful wife to the end of my days—there. (kisses him.) '.l‘here’s an earnest of what is to come! ‘ real hans. she never did that to me. ’ false hans. potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal! bertha. eh ? “lhat an extraordinary remark! he’s caught it from the baron! poor fellow, he thinks to please me by imitating the expressions of people of rank! real hans. bertha, listen to me : there’s a great change, that you know nothing about and that i can’t explain-— bertha. a great change? yes, i see there is a great change, but your hypocritical mildness will have no effect upon me. "t ' enter tmtelstein, maria, geetouen, emma, tneres.’ ., l. u. e. tintel. my lord, the baroness has arrived! real hans. very good, it’s no aflhir of mine. i t/intel. the baroness otto von schlachenstein, your wife. real hans. my wife? he, he, he l i like that! ttntel. she says you have deserted her, and she has come with her five children to claim protection. _' real hans. five children! this is beyond a joke. i don’t object to the wife—but five children-—— false hans. potz-tausend! but this is a narrow escape! all (to real haus). oh, you monster! bertha. and he tried to kiss me, and he’s a married man! maria. with five children! _ real hans. but, listen, i "am not the baron otto von schlachenstein, and i never had a child in my life. all. oh, oh! real hans. i’m not, indeed! that’s the baron. theresa. ihat? why that’s hans——- tintel. however, here she comes. enter the baroness with five little children, l. u. e. baroness (embracing real hans). baron! cruel, cruel, baron! _ tintel. (aside). here is an opportunity that may not occur again. ahem! (pulls out his address and begins to read.) “much respected and ever to be honoured madame, we, the syndic of schlachenschloss, dazzled by the surpassing beauty of your angelic countenance ” h baroness (pushing tnrrlestersr out qf the way). come ome. . the gentleman in black i eldest child. father, dear father, come home! [they cling round him. real hans. here, i say (to false hans). these are your children, you know -- baroness. baron! h real hans. that’s your husband, ma’am—take him and be sppy! baroness. that my husband? oh, otto, i never set eyes on the young man before! false hans. no, never! potz-tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal, she never set eyes on the young man before! baroness. and yet that exclamation! the baron’s favourite own l false hans. exclamations are common property, ma’am. you didn’t marry an oath, you married a man—a very good- looking one too. take him and be happy. real hans. it’s all a mistake. go away, you bold woman, and don’t kiss me like that. baroness. otto, come home! .. real hans. i don’t know who you are, but you’re a very brazen person. i’m a single man, and consequently i haven’t a family, and i must beg that you will remove these young per- sons directly. tintel. stop a bit, here’s a chance of recording a judgment at last! have you any proof that this gentleman is your husband ? baroness. proof ? i sent him a copy of my marriage certi- lficate a week ago—to prove that i could get another if i iked. ‘ real hans. eh ? [feels in his p cket—takes out letter. baroness. and there it is! see-—my own handwriting-—and here is more of it. [undoes his shirt collar, and reads marking on his shirt, “ tto, si"..” all. “ otto, six! ” t/lntel. it is indeed in her handwriting. , here is a strong priméfacie case. let both parties appear before me to-morrow morning, and this matter shall be investigated! baroness. i’ll go to the archduke, and compel you to receive me, or forfeit your estates. you know how strict he is in his own conduct. real hans. ma’am, the stricter he is in his own conduct, the less is he likely to approve your quartering yourself on a single gentleman. you’re quite at liberty to go to the archduke—or any other potentate you please. the gentleman v use/< concerted piece. baroness. monster, do you want to leave me? you who swore you’d never grieve me? of your love at once bereave me— oh, alack and well-a-day! ' baron. ma’am, i don’t know what your game is, quite unknown to me your name is- this dead set at me a shame is! naughty woman, go away ! bertha. oh, you monster unrelenting, listen to her loud lamenting— better be at once consenting— take her, baron—take her, pray ! ge-umpfi‘ (aside to barzounss). money of me try to borrow .till a verdict ends your sorrow (which will happen, ma’am, to-morrow) in the cottage you may stay ! gentle. this certificate i’m reading trumpets forth your evil breeding, for your conduct thus unheeding you will surely have to pay ! baroness. monster, do you mean to leave me? you who swore yoe’' never grieve me ? will you take me ? baron. no, i won’t, nm’am. baroness. don’t forsake me ? baron. no, i don’t, ma’am ! - baroness. don’t forsake me? baron. no, i don’t. phorus. monster, monster, monster, monster! hana. baron, you’re behaving sadly ! she adores you, fondly, madly— you will disappoint her sadly : seek her in her sad array ! bertha now she says she means to love you, and but it doesn't seem to grieve you grumpf. of her love she will bereave you oh alack and well-a-day ! baron. she’s no kind of wife of mine. ’tis for her (indicating bertha) i sigh and pine. bertha. you’ve been drinking too much wine such a thing to dare to say! chorus. baron, you’re behaving badly ! she adores you, fondly, madly- you will disappoint her sadly: seek her in her sad array ! baron. i've been drinking? why how dare you l bertha. don‘t be thinking i could bear you ! grumpf. for a linking, pray, prepare you ! hans. chains are clinking to ensnare you! gentle. stop your winking, she must share you ! all. baron, you’re behaving badly, etc. [at end of finale, basosess rushes of frantically l. u. e. leaving real hans surrounded by children. the gentle/van v bla ¢. : act ii. soene.—gastle gates of schlachenschloss. (the market boys and girls of act i. discovered.) they are engaged in preparing . triumphal arch for the arrival of the baron. chorus. in service, now, against our wills, compelled, alas, to stop ! we polish panes and window sills, and twirl the airy mop ! with every kind of mortal dread, we hear the baron's yoke, contrast it with the life we led as happy market folk l enter gnumrrr, l. u. e., at the end of chorus, cracking at long whip, and carrying aroll of calico. grunnpfl’. now, then, this won't do! this ain’t business, you know. come, the baron will be here in a minute, and the preparations for his welcome are not half finished. here is the scroll which is to surmount the arch. it’s my own composition. (unrolls scroll, “ welcome little stranger.’ ’) come, up with it. [cracks /whip-—they hang up scroll. maria. if you please, we can’t work if you crack your whip like that. grumpfl’. why not? [c'ra,ck¢'ng whip. maria. it makes us jump. grurnpfl’. ha! dou’t you complain as long as you only get the crack of it. theresa. why, you wouldn’t hit a woman. grumpf. wouldn’t ? why not ? gre°tchen. what, hit a woman who couldn’t hit you back avam . °grmnp_fl’. why you don’t suppose i’d be such a fool as to hit anybody who could ‘. gretchen. yes, i do. grumpfl’. then you don’t know me. no, no, the baron keeps me to flog the women and children. all the strong men are flogged by machinery. but don’t you abuse my whip : i’m very fond of my whip—i always have it about me. gretchen. you deserve to_have it about you! and if you’re so fond of it, don’t give it to us. we don’t like it. the gentleman in black grumpfi’ (furious). what’s that ? gretchen. nothing, i didn’t speak. grumpfil you said that i deserved to have it about e. gretchen. i don’t call that speaking, i call that thinking out loud. grurnpf. think to yourself then, or my whip will take to thinking out loud. and when it once begins it doesn’t leave ' in a hurry. sonc.-gru\ rr ~'. n o giddy flirt is this good whip: if once it holds you in its grip, of fickleness you can’t complain it comes again, again, again ! (cracking whip.) you can’t forget it—ii you do, be sure it will remember gou— its warm attentions will.not wane, ’twill come again, again, again! (cracking whip.) a heedless whip—it little reeks of beauty, figure, age or sex ; if once it holds you in its rein it comes again, again, again ! ’(cracluing whip.) a demoerat—prepared to strike ! the old, the sick, the weak alike! where once it’s been, it's always fain to come again, again, again ! (c'z'acklng whip.) [noise heard without, all come down hurriedly. maria. my dears, here’s the baron? how do i look ? gretchen. beautiful, dear—for you! oh, i'm in such a state of mind ! _ maria. if he touches me, i shall pinch him. grumpfl’. now, then, welcome his lordship—hurrah! the others (very faintly). hurrah! enter real hans, l. u. e., preceded by four servants bowing and walking backwards. he carries two of the children in his arms, the others are hanging about him. (he still retains all the outward appearance of the baron, with the manner of hans.) grurnpf. now then, take care, he’s going to begin! [all very frightened. real hans (looking at the arch). oh, how sweetly pretty! (holding up child.) look at it, tommy, ain’t it sweetly pretty! (grumrrr makes a preposterous bow .which frightens real hans very much.) now look here, don’t you hit me, i'm the baron, and you must be respectful. if you’re rude i shall be seriously annoyed. ' the gentlem./ v in black. ; grumpfi’. rude? my lord, i was making a bow. raeal hans. oh, i beg your pardon—but, may i ask who you are . grumpfl‘. ho, ho! that’s good! who am i ? his lordship’s joke! ho, ho, ho! (aside to servants.) he don’t often joke —so laugh, or you’ll catch it! servants. ho, ho, ho! real hans. look here, i don’t want to appear inquisitive, but i’m a stranger here, and i should like to know your name. - grumpfl’. i’ve been ten years in your lordship’s service, but if your lordship wishes me to mention my name, i’m delighted to humour your lordship’s joke. it’s grumpfi". . real hans. grnmpff, of course. ha, ha! (aside) i suppose i ought to have known that. grumpfi’. ha, ha! he’s been drinking. real hans. it’s my amusing way, my friends. (sees tnarussa.) hallo, theresa ! don’t you know me? theresa. n o, my lord—that is, i’ve seen you real hans. seen me, that’s a good ’un. (c'huekles.) why i’ve driven you up to market every day these twelve years. therea. driven me ? oh, dear no ! hans drives me always. grampfl’ (aside). he's been drinking a good deal. (aloud) my lord, i've organised the servants of the castle. i had to engage villagers for the purpose, but i’ve spent a fortnight in drilling them into their work. they’ve done pretty well, but i’ve several complaints to make. this girl, maria, burnt the toast last night. real hans (going up to maria, and taking her hand). ah, maria, i’m so glad to see you, my dear! i hope they’vo made you pretty comfortable. grumpfl’. i’ve ordered her seven days’ black-hole, and all her hair out off ! real hans. what! maria? grumpfl”. yes. she actually burnt the toast! real hans. oh, dear me, you shouldn’t have done that, grumpff. you mustn’t out off maria’s hair, you know. maria and i are very old friends, and i couldn’t hear of such a thing. grumpf. oh. he’s mad ! quite mad ! real hans. any more complaints ? grumpfl. lots! theresa has dry bread and water for a fortnight. real hans. theresa fed on dry bread! theresa, who had such an appetite, too? ho, ho! why what has she done? . the gentleman in black’. grumpfi. spilt the milk! a pint! real hans. oh dear, dear, you mustn’t punish theresa for spilling a pint of milk ! grumpfl’. not punish her ? real hans. not on any consideration. why how hungry she must be! now look here, grumpff, i’m sorry to trouble you, but you’ll oblige me very much if you’ll be so good as to fetch theresa two or three nice slices of galantine and a bottle of—- what would you like a bottle of, theresa ? theresa. hock. real hans. and a bottle of hock. will you be so good ? grumpfl’. eh? oh, of course, if your lordship wishes it! real hans. you don’t mind ? grunipf. oh dear no ! not at all. real hans. well, trot along, grumpfll mind—the best . hock! maria. why, he’s as mild as curds and whey ! and grumpff told us you were a devil ! real hans. the devil he did! grumpfi, did you tell these ladies i was a devil? _ grumpfi’ (aside). ladies ! (aloud.) yes, my lord, i did. and so you are! real hans. oh, grumpff, you shouldnn‘ have told ’em that. that 'was very unkind of you, grumpfil i wouldn’t have believed it of you, grumpff—i wouldn’t indeed! now, my dears, if you will be so good as to go into the hall, grumpff will see that you have everything of ' the best, won’t you, grumpff ? and if he doesn’t, let me know, my dears, and he shall be dis- charged. grumpfll it’s my belief i’m fast asleep and dreaming. (aloud.) my lord, i don’t know whether i’m asleep or awake-— will your lordship be good enough to pinch me? real hans. with pleasure, grumptf. where would you like to have it? grump_fi". in the calf of the leg, my lord, if you don’t mind? real hans. certainly, grumpff—here ? [finches his leg. grumpf (screaming). i’m awake! [emeunt grumrff and seevaets laughing, l. real hans (surrounded by children). this is bertha’s wedding day ! this morning she marries that fearful baron who’s at this moment occupying my body! and he’s a married man! and i can’t prevent it ! [baby cries. st child. papa, baby’s hungry. real hans. i hear him, my dear, but i don’t know what to the gentleman v black. ' : give him; i ain’t used to children, my dear—it’s very awkward. do you think he would like achop, and a glass of beer? would it like a chop, then—a pickley wickley wee? never did know anything about children. take it away to giunipff, my dear, and tell him to do all that’s necessary. (eldest h l takes baby, and all children go of.) poor little things ! it’s a dreadful responsibility. oh, bertha, bertha, what am i under- going on your account!’ enter br;a ‘ua, r. u. e. bertha. my lord! real hans. bertha! you here? i came away here to get away gem you. your lover probably awaits you. you’d better to im. - g bertha. yes, my lord, but as you’ve engaged all my friends as your servants, i’ve come to ask if you will be so kind as to give thglgl a holiday this evening to enable them to be present at my we ing. real hans. are you not afraid to present yourself before such a bloodthirsty vindictive villain as i am represented to be? bertha. oh, but everybody says you’ve changed so wonder- fully in the past fortnight, that you’re now just as mild and good-hegted asum(yi' po'{)r glans used to bc! real ans. se to e. bertha. yes. (crying) he’s so strangenow! he swears so dreadfully, and he gets tipsy every night—so tipsy! so—so- ti sy. ‘ plteal hans. the dissipated beast! bertha. and when i won't sit on his knee—which i won’t— i won’t—i wo.\i"t do—he pinches me! real hans. the brute. i’ll pay him out for this! bertha. oh,_ its all my fault; i was so unkind to him that it turned his bram. _ but_i’m determmed to make amends for my wlck ;id il , ailig if lovmg-kmdness can brmg h m round, he’ll soon e a rig agam. soiw .-bertr-ia. ah, once he loved me blindly, all other girls above ! i treated him unkindly and sported with his love: i smiled on others sweetly and would not tell him why : i broke his heart completely a wretched girl am i ! ah, me, a wretched girl am ! iv. s ' the gentle./wazv v bla cs: his head is turned with sorrow: . he hates his’dearest friends—-‘ . i’ll marry him to-morrow, _ and then i'll make amends ! the grief with which he's laden i’ l lighten all my life: a gentle little maiden‘, a loving little wife! ah me, i’ll try to makoamends l ah me, i’ll try to make amends! ‘ [emit bertha, l. real hans. poor little girl !----and to think that all that devotion, under difficulties, she lavishes on that senseless brute, is, in reality, my property! -l_t’s enough to make a fellow swear that he’ll stick to his own body for the rest of his life! false hans (without). potz.tausend himmel sackerment noch emmal! where’s your.master? ’ enter gauiurrr, e.folll‘q ll/‘ed’ by) fhlsir. h.‘ans, whom he is‘endeav¢ruring’to stop. '.; ' ' grnmpfl”. come, ‘come, ypung man,'this _won’t' do. _ _ false hans. young inanl. you; _know whom you’re addressing, grumpff? . __._ _ ‘ _ _ __ _‘ _ _ - j_ ‘ __ grumpf. grumpff ! he calls me gijumplf ! -here come out of this! '_ . .' ' ' . _ [collars him—'reai. ha me. hall. = act iii. ’ is scsne.-—same. the table l.c., should “be brought down level with the settee r.c., for this act. ‘ loan saxmundeam enters with mr. pimrit. ld. sam. (seated). the surrender of the estate, mr. parfit, can be made at once. par. (seated). this very day. the mortgagee, mr. cramp- ton, attended, as agreed at the rolls, made the usual affidavit, and applied for and obtained a final order of foreclosure. that order is the title deed shutting out your lordship’s equity to redeem. ld. sam. but the surrender—how is that to be effected ? par. that must be done, of course, by a deed under seal. as you are anxious to conclude this matter to-day, i will endorse a short deed on the mortgage, which your lordship and mr. crampton will execute. ld. sar. that is all you have to say ? par. as your legal adviser, that is all i have to say. but i think i am more than a legal adviser. i believe i am entitled to look upon myself as a friend. . ld. sam. most certainly, a friend. par. thank you. then speaking as a friend-—as a very true and devoted friend—let me implore you to consider whether you are acting reasonably in not making an eb'ort to preserve this old property? when mr. crampton is made acquainted with the circumstances, he will surely give time. moreover, there are a dozen of your friends who would gladly afford you every facility. even i myself, or my partner _ld. sax. mr. parfit, i will not hear you on this subject. brantinghame is mortgaged to the very crows’ nests. an appeal to mr. crampton’s consideration is absolutely out of the question: and if i were to borrow money to stave off the evil day, i should be staving it off--—th.at is all—and that with money for which i can ofler no adequate security. i have said enough. par. but the old place, in which nine generations of sax- mundhams have been born, and have lived, and died! ld. sam. mr. parfit, i protest that these considerations should not be submitted to me. these are points that i have . brantinghame hall. no right to consider. let me hear no more of this, i pray. nay, sir, i insist. par. as your lordship pleases. your lordship has made me feel that i have outstripped my duty. [rising to go. ld. sam. no, parfit, no, my dear old friend (taking parfit’s hand.) pardon me, if i spoke harshly, but i—i am much upset. i am an old man, and not strong—no, not strong. so you will pardon me, i know, and you will believe that all i would have said is, that i am resolved, and that i must not be gainsaid. i would have said this gently, parfit, but—'i am unstrung. par. pray say no more. it must be—that is certain; mr. crampton is due in ten minutes. i will get the papers together without delay. [emit parfit. ld. sam. (at fireplace). yes, it must be. oh, my old home, my old home! . enter lady saxmosnhan. lady sax. has mr. parfit gone ? ld. sam. (seated). yes, janet, mr. parfit has gone. lady sam. he can give us no hope ? ld. saw. there is no room for hope. with hope we have done. janet, the old hall in which three centuries of red- maynes have lived and died, must go! lady sam. (quietly). then i will make the necessary pre- parations. ld. sam. we shall be poor, janet. lady sam. that will matter but little, saxmundham. we must live quietly. ld. sam. very poor, janet. lady sam. well, we must live very quietly, my dear. that is all. ld. sam. janet, we are mined! [breaks down. lady sam. (going to him and sitting on his l.). my husband! my love of fifty years ago! my love, my cherished love of to- day! come, be brave. there is such a thing as ruin, but take heart, my dear, it has not come to us yet. ld. sam. why, janet, my girl, we have nothing left! lady sam. nay, we have much, for we have each other. ld. sam. yes, it is true. ‘i ask your pardon. we have much, for we have each other. lady sax. in this half century, we have seen many changes. children have been born to us, they have grown to manhood, and they have died in the very flower of their lives. friends brantjnghame hall. have fallen around us as leaves in autumn. our fortunes, that rose with the dawn of life have set'with its setting sun. but, throughout our changing fate, our love of long ago has been true to us-—it has never quitted us, even for one brief hour. let us thank god for this true and staunch friend, for through- out it has been our most precious possession, and we have it still. ld. sam. my own dear lady! . lady sam. in pain. sorrow and sickness, in the birth- chamber, in the death-chamber, have we not turned to one another for comfort, and have we ever turned in vain? ld. sam. no, no! never! never! (they rise.) as we were to one another in the sweet old days of courtship, when life was bright, and hope was young and strong, so are we now in the evening of our days—so shall we be, till the long night comes. for i am as i have ever been, your ladyship’s most devoted and most faithful lover! [kisses her hand with old'fashioned courtesy. enter alan_ c. alar. father, i hear that you want to speak to me. ld. sam. alaric, my dear boy, i have just broken some grievous news to your dear mother, and she has borne it superbly. it will affect you seriously, my boy. bear it as she has done alar. why, what has happened ? ld. sam. my dear child, a fortnight ago you told your mother of your attachment to the daughter of my old friend thursby. mabel will be rich—very rich, and i had good reason to believe that your own fortune would, in some measure, balance hers. but that is so no longer. i am a penniless old man, and you will have to make your own way. to do this, it will be necessary that you go to india for some years. under these circumstances, it is your duty, my dear fellow, to absolve mabel from her promise. [goes up. alar. absolve mabel from her promise! [crosses to lady saxmusnhaal lady s. (on sofa). oh, my poor boy! ld. sam. (coming down). for a time. you will have little, very little to live upon, and no son of mine would ever lay him- self open to the suspicion of being a fortune-hunter. so you will give me your promise not to take advantage of the regard that the child has for you, but to explain to her, frankly and honourably, the position in which you are placed. _ brantinghame hall. alma miss thursby, i am doing you a justice. i must go to india for some years, and i’ve promised my father that, in the meantime, i will abstain from communicating with you, except on the footing of a mere acquaintance. for, as he says very truly, you are not old‘ enough to judge for yourself. mab. (turning to alaric). that’s very rude of him. surely seventeen is the very prime of life ! alar. (bowing gravely). it would certainly seem so. mab. then we are to be mr. redmayne and miss thursby, i .suppose, in future. ala.r. yes; i believe that is what happens when an engage- 'ment is broken of. (takes her hand mechanically.) i beg your pardon. (releases it.) force of habit. mab (seated). then, mr. redmayne, i am greatly concerned to hear of your serious loss. alar. miss thursby, accept my sincere thanks for your sympathetic condolence. [alari sits on sofa. ll/fab. i presume that the loss of your fortune will not mate- rially affect your political principles, mr. redmayne ? alar. no, miss thursby. nothing has happened to shake my conviction that property should be equally divided. in fact, .i am more of that opinion than ever. may i trust that separa- tion from your political preceptor will not endanger the stability of your own convictions? mub. (rising, enthusiastically). no; i shall always be an out-and-out radical, in memory of the dear old days of poetry and sentiment ! it is a radical that i am, isn’t it, ric ? [crossing to alario. alar. yes, mab. oh, i forgot. jl/lab. so did i ! ‘ aim. accept, i beg, my sincere apologies, miss thursby. [rises. mab. mr. redmayne, we were both in fault. so you are going away for two years ? alar. yes, two or three years! mab. (sighing). it’s a long time to be separated from you, dear mr. redmayne! i suppose i may say, “dear mr. redmayne ? ” alma well, i don’t know. it’s rather strong, isn’t it, to a mere acquaintance ? " mab. \nhy, i should say that at the beginning of a letter to a mere acquaintance! alar. true, so you would. it’s a very good test. i think “ dear mr. redmayne ” may be conceded. mab. dear, dear mr. bedmayne ! [sighing. aaaawzzavga/ame halaz. alar. dear, dear miss thursby | [sighing. mab. then i suppose i may say that i am yours faithfully because that is what i should say at the end of a letter to a mere acquaintance. alar. true: you would say, “yours truly,” or “yours faithfully.” i think “yours faithfully” may be conceded. mab. then i am yours, ric—yours—yours—faithfully— oh, how faithfully always, always faithfully ! so faithfully | so faithfully | [sobs in his arms. alar. and i am yours—yours, mab—so truly, oh, so truly ever, ever, most truly yours | [embrace. mabel then withdraws herself demurely; goes towards door stops, turns and looks at alaric —they are about to rush into each other's arms, but they suddenly check themselves. mab. good morning, mr. redmayne ! alar. good morning, miss thursby ! (exit mabel.) how true it is a fellow never knows what he can do till he tries. if anyone had told me, an hour ago, that i could have schooled myself to address mabel upon a footing of the coldest and most ceremonious formality, i should have questioned his sanity ! [exit alaric. enter ralph crampton and mr. parfit. par. if you will take a seat, mr. crampton, his lordship will be with you directly. ralph (seated). good. i suppose i may take it mr. parfit, that lord saxmundham is much distressed at losing brantinghame? par. he is greatly, terribly distressed, mr. crampton, though he bears it with wonderful composure. ralph. ha! mr. parfit, i'm afraid you think me a very hard-hearted and vindictive creditor. par. sir, it is not form to comment on your action in this ' his lordship its that you are well within your rights. ralph. so i m. loubtedly am. now, mr. parfit, i mean to astonish ighteen months ago, arthur red- mayne, acting ation supplied by lord saxmundham, inflicted an o' n me that might well have constituted me the life of both. but i am not the altogether remorseles- ake me to be, and time has, in some sort, dulled the y resentment. i have had the satisfaction of show xmundham that i have him completely braav iavga/ame hall, and absolutely at my mercy. that mercy i am disposed to extend. par. mr. crampton, i find it difficult to express my sense of your generosity. ralph. it is not necessary. i have no desire to pose as a good angel, for i assure you i am nothing of the kind. par. if you will allow me, i will tell him the good news without delay. [going. ralph (rising). no, i wish to tell him myself. oblige me by saying no more than that i am here, and that i wish to speak to him. par. as you please, sir. be sure that i will lose no time. [exit parfit. ralph (seated on sofa). yes, saxmundham, the account may be said to be closed between us. i have set my heel upon your neck, and to such a man as you, that is punishment enough. it is well for you that i am rich. it is even better for you that i am disposed to remember that my quarrel is not so much with you, as with your dead son. [during this speech ruth crosses the gallery from l. to r., and comes down the stairs l. ruth. ralph crampton you here ? ralph (rising much agitated). mrs. redmayne ! this is a strange meeting : i did not know that you were in england. - [ruth pauses for a moment, then moves to leave the room. ralph (up stage). mrs. redmayne-–pray hear me ! ruth (down stage). i have no wish to hear you. i think of you with terror and shame. let me pass you. ralph. mrs. redmayne, go if you will; but you have greatly misjudged me. it is perhaps no fault of your own that you have done so, for i have been cruelly misrepresented to you. ruth. there is no need to say this. i judge you from my own knowledge of your wicked nature. ralph. of that nature you know nothing. i loved you deeply, | with an unspeakable devotion. it may be that i had no all you this, but i was carried beyond myself. i was und, like a madman, i spoke madly. that love has d me ever since. it has haunted me as a nightmare ecked my peace of mind. tell me to leave you, ; but, in common mercy, tell me in gentle words it is enough that you, who had a wife, dared to s to me. i care to know no more. [crosses l, yes, i had a wife—an unworthy wife, who left bra n tingiia me hall. her misconduct was a shame to me, and i hid my shame away. when i spoke to you, i had already taken steps to break the chain that bound me to her. i spoke with the certainty that in a few weeks i should be free. i have proofs of the truth of my words—you cannot refuse to hear them! ruth. i refuse utterly. ' it concerns me not to know. i think of you as one to be shunned, and as one would shun a sin. i am set against you. ralph. (with suppresed fur_ /). it is well. i am answered—- fully and finally answered. you do not know what you have done. i will tell you. i hold lord saxmundhaufs welfare in the hollow of my hand. it is in my power to ruin him—your dead husband’s father—by a stroke of the pen. you under- stand me? it is in my power to crush the light out of his life, and send him, a miserable pauper, to his grave. i came here to-day with some sort of pity in my heart for the broken old man—with the germ of that which, under fostering circum- stances, would have developed into mercy. but such an insult —such an atrocious insult—as you have placed upon me, it is not within man’s nature to endure. there is no room within me for mercy; so with mercyl have done. [turns away to l.(:. ruth. mr. crampton ralph. it is useless to appeal. you have spoken words that cannot be withdrawn. ruth. mr. crampton, i am not a woman who withdraws her words. i speak plainly, and my words tell you what is in my heart. still, it may be that you will not do this thing. you are my enemy, for the words that i have spoken. that is natural. but to strike at me through a helpless old man, who is dear to me—t stifle the mercy that had begun to plead for him, because i, who am nothing to him, have angered you, is the act of a coward; and it may well be, ralph crampton, that you are not a coward. [emit ruth. ralph. a curse on the ill -fortlme that caused you to cross my path at such an hour! you count on my love? yes, i love you, but take heed, ruth iledmayne, for there is a love that is more like hate than hate itself! . enter loan saxmundham and me. parrit. ld. sam. sir, i have come to hear what you have to say to me. mr. parfit is my solicitor, and i prefer that what takes place between us should take place in his presence. [pari'‘n' sits at table. ralph. lord saxmuudham, -i have little to say thatit will bra n t ingha me hall. please you to hear. i am here, as arranged, to take over your equity of redemption. pa/r. (rist'ng.) mr. crampton! sir! ld. sam. (seated). hush, ipray. (to ralrh.) sir you will understand that when i undertook that the mortgage debt and interest should be paid into court at a given day, i believed myself to be a man of wealth and substance. i—i have since been undeceived. i am advised that the surrender must be under seal, and mr. parfit is prepared to endorse such a deed on the mortgage. pm". mr. crampton !—nay, my lord, i will speak! sir, you have most cruelly misled me as to the object of your visit. you told me that you came to inform his lordship that you were disposed to be merciful ld. sam. (peremptorily). mr. parfit, i insist that you will not speak of mercy in relation to myself! on pain of my displeasure, sir! it is not a word that i am accustomed to introduce into my dealings with my creditors. the money is due, and cannot pay it. that is all. mr. parfit, you will be so obliging as to prepare the surrender without delay. . enter ruth and me. tmmsnv, hurriedly. . thurs. one moment, saxmundham ruth. stay, lord saxmundham. i must speak to you. ld. sam. this is an unaccountable interruption. thursby, what does it mean ? thurs. it means, saxmundham, that this poor great-hearted lady has just learnt that you are in grave trouble, and she insisted upon coming to you at once. i am ashamed to say that i did my best to prevent her, but, thank heaven,_ inetfectually ! ruth. yes, you must listen to me. i came to england to be a daughter to a bereaved iather—not to take an old man’s inheritance from him. if you will not take the wealth that was your son’s you cannot at least, prevent my paying this man his claim. ld. sam. madame, i thank you, but it is impossible for me to entertain such a proposal. thurs. (standing behind loan saxmundham). now, sax- mundham, don’t be quixotic. there will be no obligation on either side. reduced to its elements, mrs. redmayne, who is one of the shrewdest women of business i ever met, invests £ , at % per cent. on unimpeachable security! capital woman of business, mrs. redmayne ! bra n t ingha me hall. ruth. i have nothing to add to what i have already said. thu/ra. (ru¢y"uliy‘). well ma’am, then i suppose i’ve no right to oppose your intention to go. i dare say i ought to be glad to get rid of you. but i've grown to be very fond of you, ma’am—very fond indeed—and—and you’ve behaved abomin- ably—and—and—(enter mabel). now, mabel, my good girl, why do you invariably came in at highly inconvenient moments ? mab. papa, i’m very sorry. i did not know you were busy. [going. ruth (down). mr. thursby, i want very much to speak to mabel. (aside to 'i‘hursby.) i pray that you will not refuse me this. it is for the last time. i—i will do her no harm. t hm-s. well, i don’t know. i oughtn’t to, you know. but there—there’s a hat-fall of good in you, i verily believe—and its for the last time, poor soul. (crosses to poor soul! poor soul! [emit tnunsny r. mab: mrs. redmayne, what has distressed you? why have you been weeping? ruth (on sofa.) why have i been weeping, my dear? why, i bring you good news, and when we bring good news to those we love, our hearts swell, and you see that is why i weep. mab (sitting on her r.) you bring good news to me ? ruth. yes, great news. i have just left lord saxmundham. he was mistaken in believing that ruin had come upon him. he is rich and happy, and it should not be needful that alaric should leave you, and so a burden will be lifted from your own heart, and your father will be glad when he sees that his little daughter’s eyes are bright again! mub. alaric will not go away from me ! oh, mrs. redmayne, you have done this! [kneeling on rutn’s e. ruth. yes. do not ask me more. i have done this. _ mab. if there is any virtue in the prayers of two broken- hearted lovers, whom stern necessity has placed upon a footing of mere acquaintanceship, they are yours from the bottom of our hearts! [kisses her. ruth. and now, my child, i am going to make you sorry. a great trouble has befallen me, and it is needful that i return at once to australia. mftb. oh, mrs. redmayne, are you saying “ good-bye ” to me ? ruth. i have something more to say than _“good-bye.” i may never see you again, and i ask you to promise me, if ever you hear ill of me, not to believe it, but to believe that there is something kept back—something which, if it were known, would clear me of all blame. it will gladden me to know, m, vr vcz /ma hall. when i am far away, that there is one little heart in england into which my memory may creep for shelter, when the pitiless storm breaks upon it. mab. oh, i promise! i promise i never, never, never will i believe any one who says anything against you! oh, mrs. redmayrfe, tell them what it is, and look at them with those brave, steadfast, truthful eyes, and they will believe! ruth. it would be useless, mabel. (rising.) and now, good-bye, my dear! oh, my dear, good-bye! [embraces her—then turns towards the door— stops, trurns-—they rush into each other‘s arms. then emit uth. enter trwnsny. thurs. (_ to mabel, who is sobbing on the sofa). mabel, my girl ! come, come, you mustn’t cry like this ! mab. oh, she’s going—going from me, never to return ! °[sobs. thurs. well, yes, she certainly is going-—that is to say—oh, yes, she’s going. mab. but why is she going, and why don’t you stop her? thurs. why, she’s going because she—well, she has an appointment with her solicitor in australia—and she’s got some shopping to do in sydney. mab. (rising). i don’t believe a word of it. there’s some wicked plot to send her away. (thubsby interrupts her with attempts to emplain.) but ’ll find out what it is, if i die for it, you great, big, cruel, hard-hearted papa ! [emit mabel. thurs. now, why will women do things that can’t be explained to young girls? a woman ought always to argue thus : “can what i'm going to do be explained to young girls ? no, it cannot. then, dash my wig, if i do it !” enter parker. par. (announcing). mr. parfit. enter parrit. emit paam<:r. 'l'hurs. hallo, parfit! well, here’s a pretty kettle of fish! par. yes, mr. thursby; it certainly is extremely serious. . [sits on sofa. k thurs. there’s a thundering lot of good in that woman, you now . par. yes, i daresay there is. 'l‘here’s good in all of us, if we only knew it. but i suppose it is unnecessary to remind you brant vghame hall. that by uttering a forged will, to say nothing of the other docupments, she has brought herself within the pale of the law . thurs. well, what then ? you don’t expect me to prosecute her, i suppose? par. as you please, mr. tbursby. but it’s my duty to remind you, as one of the trustees under the will which this forgery was intended to set aside, that if you don’t prosecute her, you will be compounding a felony. thurs. felony, be hanged! it’s a family matter, entirely between ourselves. how is it to get about ? [crosses to r. . par. you forget mr. crampton. he is her declared and relentless enemy. if he should persist in prosecuting this unhappy woman, what would you do ? thurs. my dear parfit, what an absurd question. break every bone in his body, of course! the things obvious. par. (rising). well, mr. thursby, i’ve no wish to see this poor lady punished; but it was my duty to advise you, and i’ve done it. thurs. it was as you say, my dear parfit, your duty to advise me, and it was equally my duty to pitch your advice to the devil. very good; you've done your duty, and i’ve done mine. it’s a pleasant reflection. let’s shake hands on it. ralrh cramrton has entered during this speech. ralph (down l.c.). mr. thursby, i must ask you to hear me on this matter. thurs. mr. crampton, i prefer to have nothing to say to ou. y ralph. very likely, but you must and shall hear me! thurs. (with suppressed rage). mr. crampton! sir! i can guess the abominable motive which has prompted you to present yourself here. anticipating this interview, i have taken the precaution, as a magistrate, to bind myself over to keep the peace towards all her majesty’s subjects for the space of three calender months. that will give you a good start, sir! i advise you to make the most of it. ' ralph. mr. thursby, i have something of graver import to deal with than any terms of reproach you can frame. i have been witness, this afternoon, to an act of heroic devotion on the part of a most pure and blameless lady. it has moved me as i am not wont to be moved; the more so because my indefensible conduct is the cause of the inestimable sacrifice she has made. v. x bra./vtiivghame hal/.. ruth has entered unobserved. _ thurs. why, what do you mean, sir ? ralph. that mrs. redmayne, in denying her marriage, has uttered the noblest falsehood that ever fell from the lips of woman. i know mr. noel ross, and i had it from his own lips, after arthur redmayne’s departure, that he had solemnised this marriage. thurs. (turning to ruth). madam, is this true? ruth (up stage). it is true. [tnnnsnv grasps her hand. ralph. it is impossible for me to approach lord saxmundham on the subject, so have brought my repentance to you, in the belief that you will be willing to turn it to this blameless lady's advantage. i beg you most earnestly, in the name of common justice, to communicate with mr. noel ross, that my statement may be corroborated. thurs. now, if any one will show me how to treat an infernal rascal who has done an uncommonly fine thing, i shall be per- sonally indebted to him! [grosses to r. “ralph. i put forth no plea for consideration. i have most deeply wronged this lady, and i will leave nothing undone until i have atoned. [going l. ruth. mr. crampton—before you go, will you let me tell you that, from my heart, i pity and pardon you? it will, perhaps, comfort you in the days to come to remember this. ralph. mrs. redmayne, i believe there is no act of generosity of which you are not capable. from my very heart i thank you. [e:l;it_ralrh cramrton. thurs. now, there’s a fellow i should like to knock down with.one hand and pick up with the other ! (to ruth, taking her hand in his.) my dear young lady—my very dear young lady, i deserve to be kicked for having believed you. if you’re an average sample of australian produce, the sooner a ship-load of you is shot into london society the better! parfit, lord saxmundham is a sticklor for nobility. let us go and prove to him that heaven has blessed him with the noblest daughter in england! ‘ exeunt thubsby and parrit. ruth. ralph crampton, your eart was slow to turn; your eyes were closed. 'l‘o open them it needed that a woman should clothe herself with shame. that has been done; and now, you see! ~ _ ' enter parker with card. par. a gentleman wishes to seeyou, na’am. _ ruth. to see me ! who can wish to see me? [reads card. aramtinghame hall. rejoice the souls and brighten the lives of their fathers—and their mothers—and their children—and their loving, faithful, mourning wives ! ruth (who has become hysterical during the latter part of this speech). noel ross! noel ross ! why do you speak of mourning wives to me? [rising. ross (rising). now, my dear, be calm; bear this like a good and brave woman. ruth. tell me all ! you speak in parable ! you could not tell me of such things, unless—oh speak—speak! ross. my dear child, there is a happiness so overwhelming, that it calls for all our strength to bear it ! arthur redmayne rushes in, and folds ruth in his arms. ross crossing behind him. red. ruth, my own ruth ! ruth. my husband ! my husband ! oh, my husband red. ruth, my darling, look up—i am alive and well ! i have come to be with you, my own to love, to cherish, and to comfort you until death comes to us in very deed! look up, my darling, we will never part again! [puts her over to r.). [ruth shows symptoms of fainting—recovers—looks at her husband—then seems likely to faint again. she steadies herself with an effort, turns to nofl ross, and as she kneels, says, “let us pray!” creatures of impulse. a musical faia y tale - in one act. first performed at the royal court theatre (under the management of miss m. litton) on april nd, . creatures of’ impulse. scene.—emie ‘i r. of “ the three pigeons,” a country inn ; entrance to inn, r. ; entrance through gate, . j mooes and vrrmagens discovered. orening cnonus. did you ever know a lady so particularly shady, ' though a very nice old party she was thought to be ? i could see upon my honour, when i first set eyes upon her, that she wasn't any better than she ought to be. enter boomslehaent, l., with a very large bag of gold—they shake hands with him. boomblehardt. i give you good morning, ladies. i give you good morning, peter. jacques. what, for nothing? boom. yes, i don't charge for it. st villager. why, master boomblehardt, you’re getting liberal in your old age. boom. yes, my dear, yes—-he’s but a churl that keeps all his happiness to himself. it’s a lovely day! the very trees are waving their long arms in ecstasy at the bright blue sky above them, and the bright green fields below them; and the pretty little birds are oarolling a hymn of gratitude from their very topmost branches. it is indeed a good morning, and i give it you—i give it you! jacques. you've got some more happiness in that long bag of yours, if one may judge by the chink of it. can’t you spare some of that? ’ boom. ha, ha! do you know what that is? it’s go- - -old! nd v. all gold? boom. yes, my dear, all go- - -old! it’s my poor little rents that i’ve been collecting. . creatures or impulse. rd v. why, she’ll be starved! martha. no; she says she never felt better in her life. she says that food always disagrees with her! hpeter. it disagrees with me sometimes, but i take it for all t at! st v. why don’t you turn her out neck and crop? martha. turn out a woman who can live on nothing for three weeks ? why, she’s a fairy! she’d be in again through the keyhole in a twinkling ! peter. i know how to prevent that. martha. how ? peter. stuff up the key-hole. martha. peter, you’re a goose. enter p rettn, running from l. u. e. pipette. oh, aunt, aunt ! i've such news for you! (sees v l- laeees.) oh, i didn’t know anybody was here. oh, i beg your pardon! oh, gracious ! oh, how extremely awkward ! martha. why, what’s the matter with the girl? pipette. oh, i’m so confused! martha. why, what has confused you? pipette. oh, it’s all these people! oh, please go away! oh, i can’t bear people! boom. why, bless the girl, how shy she is! martha. shy! there isn’t a greater donkey in the country. why, there’s a portrait of her great grandfather in her bedroom, and she always turns its face to the wall before she does her hair. pipette. well, i’ve been properly brought up. a young girl can’t be too particular. peter. but what has happened ? pipette. oh, i can’t tell you before all these people! oh, please send them away ! lst v. oh, i’m sure, if we're in the way? [emit into inn. nd v. if it’s very improper, we wouldn’t hear it for the world. but i dare say mr. boomblehardt and peter won’t mind. [emit into inn. rd v. put it to them as delicately as you can, jenny. a young girl can’t be too particular. [emit into inn. boom. well, now that they’re gone, what is it? if it’s imperence, whisper! pipette. oh, if you please it’s a sergeant, and he’s coming here! martha. a sergeant! well, and what is there to blush at in that ? crea tures . of impulse. pipette. oh, but he’s such a long sergeant! you can’t think what a long sergeant he is! and oh, if you please, he’s got a moustache and all sorts of dreadful things. martha. a sergeant? it must be the famous sergeant klooque, who distinguished himself at johannesberg—he’s the bravest soldier in his majesty’s service. this is his native village, and he wrote to me to say that he would be here in the course of the week—on furlough. he’s going to make the three pigeons his headquarters. r pipette. a live sergeant coming to stop with us? martha. certainly. ‘ pipette. oh, then, if you please, and if it’s quite convenient, i should like to retire from the world and go into a monastery. lllartha. a monastery ? so should i. pipette. oh, if you please, i mean a nunnery. peter. a nunnery? so should i. martha. nonsense ; stop here and welcome the brave gentle- man, and if you don’t do it well you shall marry peter to- morrow. now, master boomblehardt, if you’ll step into the house we’ll see what we can do for you. boom. by all means. allow me to present you with—-— martha. with what, for gracious sake ? boom. my arm. exeunt boomnleearnt and martha into the house. pipette (crying). oh dear,-oh dear, what shall i do? i don’t know how to welcome a brave gentleman. peter. don’t welcome him. pipette. but if i don’t i shall have to marry you to-morrow. peter. never mind—it’ll serve me right. pipette. but i hate brave gentlemen. peter. but i am not a brave gentleman. pipette. you ? you’re the greatest coward between this and trent. peter. i am a coward. pipette. i hate a brave gentleman, but i detest a coward. peter. all men are cowards. pipette. what ? jacques bonpré, who gave you that thrash- ing at bontemps fair, and pierre pontois, who tied you on your horse wrong side before, for trotting over his turnips? and jean leroux, who dragged you through a horse pond for plundering his egg-roosts ? _ peter. all cowards ?—i’ve a theory about that. in danger, all men are equally frightened, but some men have the power of concealing their fears-—others haven’t. i’m one of those who creatures of impulse. haven’t. some men are afraid to own that they are frightened —other men are not. i’m one of those who are not. pipette. well, at all events sergeant klooque is a brave man, and i advise you to be civil to him. oh dear, oh dear, what shall i do ?—how i do hate a man! peter. so do i. pipette. oh, how iwish the world was full of women ! peter. so do i. _ . _ ' pipette. now, i’m not at all afraid of women. . peter. no more am i. . pipette. i like women. peter. so do i ! pipette. but men are so-—so-—soi- peter. oh, they are— — pipette. what? peter. so—so. very so—so. pipette. i mean they are so fond of staring at one, and putting their arms round one’s waist, and squeezing one‘s hand.‘ peter. yes, it’s their way; i’ve done it myself. pipette. they wink too. peter. yes, they would. pipette. now, women never winkat me. they let me alone. peter. they let me alone, too, worse.luck. pipette. you can say what you like to a woman—at least i mean i can. but i can’t even look at 'a man. peter. you can look at me. pipette. i don’t call you a man. peter. well, don’t call him a man, and then you can say what you like to him. he won’t mind it. pipette. that/s impudent. peter. it’s meant to be. pipette. if you want to be impudent, why don’t you be impudent to a man? peter. oh, i should be a fool! why, he’d box my ears! pipette. and you pretend to love me! peter. exaet y—i pretend to love you. that’s all. it. amuses you and gratifies me. (aside) i’ll show her that she’s not going to ride rough-shod over me! .(aloud.) _you’.ve got my snug little farm in your eye. pipette. peter! peter. well? pipette. peter, you’re a pig! peter. a pig ? pipette. a pig! _ peter. then you’ve got my snug little sty in your eye! crea tures ¢ impulse. enter sebgeant klooone. serg. young lady, i salute you! the hero of j ohannesberg salutes you ! pipette. oh, my goodness, he’s going to salute me! peter, if he salutes me, i’ll scream! serg. the young lady appears alarmed ? peter. the young lady is very shy. serg. shy ? peter. yes. you soldiers are such disreputable dogs. pipette. oh yes, if you please, sir, you soldiers are such disreputable dogs! oh, if you please, i didn't mean that ! oh, my ! what a dreadful thing to have said ! . serg. some soldiers are—but not the hussars of the king’s body guard. our colonel is extremely particular. serg. a soldier of the king’s hussars, although a gallant son of mars ; to no one may he be gallant, except his mother and his aunt ! all. except his mother and his aunt ! pipette. a very proper rule indeed, and one that surely should succeed. peter. but don’t you find it rather slow-— monotonous, in fact? serg. oh no ! each warrior who joins our corps, can count his mothers by the score ; and as for aunts—as i’m alive- each grenadier has thirty-five ! all. each grenadier has thirty-five. peter. i shonldn’t like to serve with him ; one's aunts are elderly and grim. pipette. ' one's mothers too, as facts will show, are always aged dames. serg. oh, no! the griinmest aunt in all our corps, is seventeen—or little more ; the oldest mother’s age may be, a little short of twenty-three! ensemnle. peter and pipette. oh, sergeant, i begin to take! i’m much afraid that you’re a rake ! serg. my meaning they begin to take, it’s pretty clear that ’m a rake ! enter martha from inn. martha. sergeant klooque, as i’i alive. serg. mistress martha ! i/vhy, how pretty you’re grown! creatures of impulse. martha. this is indeed a distinction you have conferred on us! pipette. oh! martha. well, what’s the matter with the girl ? pipette. oh, if you please, i was thinking that the sergeant has had so many distinctions conferred on him, that he can afford to spare us one. oh, if you please, i didn’t mean that! oh, dear, what have i said! martha. and what a big man you’ve grown! why, you were a little drummer boy when you left us, and now you’re a gigantic sergeant! serg. yes, i’ve risen in the service. peter. and some day, i suppose, you’ll be an officer ? serg. yes—but that will be a long time first. pipette. oh! all. well ? pipette. oh, if you please, i was thinking, if you’re six foot long as a sergeant, how long will you be before you’re a captain ? ()h, if you please, i didn’t mean that ! oh, my! i wish i hadn’t spoken. , martha. pipette, you’re a goose. (to snnonarrt.) but we’re very glad to see you, and i hope you’ll make the three pigeons your home as long as your furlough lasts. serg. with pleasure, martha. i’ve been roughing for the last six months, and it’s no little treat to look forward to six weeks’ holiday in a pretty inn, in a pretty village, with a pretty landlady to look after ne’s wants. [puts his arm round her waist. pipette. oh, if you please, aunt, perhaps your son would like to see his room. martha. my son ? pipette. your nephew, then i martha. my nephew ? pipette. oh, if you please, i thought he must be one or the other, as his colonel is very strict, and only allows his soldiers to kiss their mothers or their aunts. oh dear, i wish i hadn’t said that ! oh my! what a dreadful thing to have said! serg. when a soldier is on furlough, discipline is relaxed. (kisses martha.) but why are you sighing ? martha. i’m thinking of my old lady. she won’t pay my rent, and she’s eaten nothing and drunk nothing for a fortnight, and she looks as plump as .ever! (mystert'ously.) she’s a fairy . peter. bah! martha. eh ? creatures of impulse. peter. stufi ! i don’t believe it. ’ martha. and why ? _ " peter. fairies do everything with a wand, don’t they i martha. well? peter. well, she cleans her teeth with a toothbrush, l’ve seen her. ‘ martha. peter, you’re a goose! pipette. i say, peter. peter. well? pipette. it’ll be a bad look-out for you and me about michaelmas! serg. suppose we tackle the old lady by turns. martha. ah, but who’ll begin ? peter (boldly). i will. all. you. peter. i. she’s no more a fairy than i am—she’s an ugly old woman, and i’d rather tackle one ugly old woman than a dozen handsome men. afraid of an old woman! why, the older they are the less i fear ’em! emeu-nt ’n‘nt'rs, martha, and sergeant, to house, r. enter old lady, . peter. now for it. i say, old lady! . lady. well, young man ? peter. i’ve a bone to pick with you. . lady. can’t stop, my ’time’s valuable. peter. oh, but you must! . lady. must, eh ? peter. do you see that ? (showing his arm.) feel it. . lady. mercy, what a ridiculous little arm! peter (pointing to biceps). do you know what that is ? lady. well, i can guess ! - peter. what is it? . lady. i suppose it’s the bone you’re going to pick with me. w's may spare ourselves the trouble—there’s very little on it. ' ' ' peter (in a rage). i say, i’m not accustomed to stand that sort of thing from a woman of your age, you know. . lady. do you. know my age? peter. about eighty, i should say. (aside) 'that’ll put her back up! . lady. eighty! nonsense, i’m eight hundred and forty- two. peter. well, you don’t look it. . lady. peter, you’re a dangerous little man! creatures of impulse. peter. i am a dangerous little man as you’ll discover. now, look here, ma’am. . lady. i’m all attention, peter! peter. you’ve been here six weeks. . lady. true. peter. you’ve paid no rent. . lady. none. peter. you don’t mean to pay any. . lady. _not a penny. peter. you don’t eat anything. . lady. nothing. peter. you don’t drink anything. . lady. not a drop. peter. and if you did you wouldn’t pay for it. . lady. not a penny. peter. n ow hasn’t it occurred to you that on the whole you’re not a profitable customer ? . lady. yes, that reflection has occurred to me. but look at it from my point of view. if you could get all you wanted from a first-r-re inn without paying for it, how long would you stop there ? peter. i should stop there until somebody did to me what i’m going to do to you. ‘ ' . lady. what’s that ? peter. turn you out. c me—toddle—trundle—vanish! . [he squares up to her as if about to strike her. . lady. why, peter, would you strike an old woman ? peter. why not? you’re as big as i am. besides you’ve less to lose. you are very ugly, and no amount of thrashing would make you uglier than you are. now i am very beautiful, and a tap on the nose would play the very deuce with me ! come —toddle ! ‘ [squares up at her; . lady. very well, peter, you’re a coward to square up at an old woman, and as a punishment you will be so good as to go on squaring up to every one you meet and telling them to “ come on!” until further notice. peter. what, squaring up like this ? (squaring) come on! . lady. yes, just like that. peter. what, at everybody i eome across ? (s'quaring.) come on! . _ _ . lady. yes, at everybody you come across. peter. big and little! ( uaring.) come on! . lady. yes,_bi and litae. ‘ eter (howling). gut they won’t like it! (sguaring.) come on ! creatures of impulse. serg. what, like this? (du/cking.) don’t! . lady. yes, like that. d sery. but they’ll think i’m afraid of ’em ! (duckiny.) on’t . . lady. sure to ! serg. but ’m not afraid of any one ! don’t ! . lady. no, you are the bravest man in the army! serg. i shall lose my reputation! i shall be branded as a coward! don’t! enter pirette from inn; she stares at sengeawt in astonishment. pipette. oh, if you please, mistress marthais compliments, and have you been successful? serg. n , she won’t go! (ducking.) don’t! pipette. i wasn’t going to. oh! if you please, what’s the matter ? serg. oh, it’s nothing! it’ll pass . (dueh'ing.) don’t! pipette. wouldn’t you like to lie down? i’m not going to hurt you. serg. n , no, my dear, i’m quite well. (ducking.) don’t ! don’t ! pipette. it’s your fun, i suppose ? serg. exactly. it’s my fun! [ducking. . lady. he’s showing you how he fought the enemy at j ohannesberg. serg. no, my dear ! i’m showing you how the enemy fought us. this is the way they retreated. don’t! don’t ! don’t! [emit smzosazvt, ducking and barking. pipette. what a strange young man! . lady. he’s a very rude young man. pipette. rude ? . lady. yes. he put his arm round my waist. pipette. are you his mother ? . lady. no, my dear, i’m not. pipette. nor his aunt? . lady. no. pipette. then i'll tell his colonel, and he’ll be flogged l . lady. i should like to see him flogged. pipette. so should i ! oh my, what am i saying ? oh, dear, i didn’t mean that! . lady. well, my dear, and what do you want ? pipette. i want to ask you a great’——great favour. . lady. yes? ' ‘ v. y . creatures of iajpulse. . pipette. you’re'such a dear old lady, that i‘m sure you’ll grant it. . lady. yes, i’m a pleasant old person. . pipette. although you’re past your prime, you’ve such bright; eyes, and such"red cheeks, and such a happy expression of countenance, that you’re prettier than many z young girl i know. . lady. yes, pm attractive—attractive, nothing more. pipette. well, you’re such a dear old lady, and i’m so fond of you, and you’ve made yourself so pleasant and so agreeable, that what i want you to do is to—is to . lady. yes, is to—is to? pipette. is .to go. . lady.‘ go ? . pipette. go._ you see, they don’t appreciate you as much as do. i think you’re a dear old lady-—perhaps the dearest old lady i ever saw, but they don’t. . lady. oh, they don’t ? pipette. no, i can’t understand it, but it is so. now, i’m sure you’re too proud-—too noble—too high-spirited to remain where you’re not wanted. aren’t you, you dear—dear olrl lady ? (kisses her.) oh, i declare i could kiss those cherry cheeks all day long! . _ . lady. all day long ? pipette. all day long! [kisses her. . lady. very good——you’re telling stories, my dear, and must be punished. as a punishment you will be so good as to go about offering to kiss and fondle every one you meet, until further notice. pipette. what, like that? (makes ieissing noise.) kiss me! . lady. yes, like that! pipette. but people will think it so odd. kiss me! . lady. yes, they’ll be surprised at first. _ pipette. but i say—gentlemen and all? kiss me! . lady. yes, gentlemen and all. pipette. but they won’t like it! . lady. oh no, they won’t mind it. . pipette. but i’m so shy ! i can’t look at a gentleman without blushing. kiss e! , . lady. oh, you’ll get over your shyness after a year or two of that sort of thing. . . _ pipette. kiss me! oh dear, oh dear, i don’t know what . -people will say! kiss me! . lady.. do. they’ll say you quiet ones are always the worst. and so you are. ' ' creatures or impulse. enter boomnmearbt from inn. pipette. oh dear, here’s that disgusting old wretch, boomble- hardt. i hate the sight of him! (to boomblehabdt.) kiss me. boom. certainly, my dear. [kisses her. pipette. how dare you take such a liberty! you insolent old man! kiss me. boom. again! why, of course. [kisses her. pipette. oh, you disgusting old man! (bomes his ears.) i‘ll . tell my aunt, and she’ll turn you out of doors, and you shall be hooted through the village. kiss me. boom. (puzzled). thank you—no more this morning. pipette. thank you, i’m sure! oh dear, oh dear! what shall i do [emit crying into house. boom. what a very strange girl. . lady (seated). i am a very strange girl. boom. ah—i was not referring to you. but i want a word with you. i want to make a bargain with you. . lady. well, get on. boom. well, mistress martha has sent me to induce you to go; but i don’t want to do anything of the kind. .i want you to stay. so if you’ll fall in with my views, i’ll do all i can to prevent their turning you out. . lady. well, what are your views ? boom. you have the wonderful gift of living without food. . lady. yes—i have that gift. boom. for the last fifty years i’ve been trying to master that wonderful secret, but in vain. it’s true i’ve brought myself down to one hard-boiled egg and a tea-cup full of soup per diam, but i find even that a great drain on my resources. now, if you’ll teach me how to live oomfortably—i don’t say luxuriously, but comfortably—on nothing at all, l’ll give you—- yes, i’ll give you a guinea! . lady. you’ll give me a guinea? boom. yes—half down and half by a bill at six months. well, come—say a guinea down. there, look at it! a whole guinea! weigh it! taste it! look at the milling. oh, it’s a beautiful guinea! [she takes it and tests it. . lady. you’re a very mean old man, and you must be punished for it. you’ll have the goodness to go on ofiering guineas from your long bag to every one you meet until further notice. boom. what, like this—allow me to offer you a guinea? . lady. thank you. (takes it.) yes, like that. boom. to every one i meet? creatures or . . serg. hang the fellow, how shall i get rid of him? stop, here’? pipette—i have it! i’ll back from pipette on to him . enter prrette from house, sergean ‘ turns to her and backs from her on to boomslehasdt’s toes. -boom. here, i say, sir, look where you’re coming to! [seroeaet backs him the stage. serg. thank heaven he’e gone at lastl pipette (to serosarvr). kiss me! sery. eh? (ducking). don’tl pipette. i can’t help it. kiss me l serg. don’tl don’t! pipette. don’t be angry, sergeant, but it’s an irresistible impulse. kiss me! serg. i’m not angry—i like it. don’t, don't! enter peter, squaring. peter. hallo, jenny, kissing sergeant klooque! come on! pipette. please, peter, i can’t help it. it’s an irresistible impulse. kiss me! (to peter). peter. come on! come on! [squaring—he aqua/res at ser- geant who due/rs. pipette. oh dear, oh dear, they’re going to fight about me. my character will be gone in no time! . peter. come on! come on! serg. don’t, don’t! peter. please don’t be angry, sergeant, but i’m compelled to hit you. i am acting under an irresistible impulse. serg. and don’t you suppose i’m ducking and dodging because i’i afraid of you. i, too, am acting under an irresistible ' impulse. enter bc)omblehard'r. - boom. (to sergeant). allow me to offer you a guinea. serg. sir, i have great pleasure in taking it. _ [pztea hits boomel ehasnrr on the back. boom. (to patas). allow me to offer you a_ guinea. peter. a guinea ? thank you! come on ! boom. (to pirette). pipette, allow me to offer you a guinea. p'ipette. you’re a disreputable old scampl kiss me, kiss me . crea tl/res of impulse. enter martha and villagers from inn. martha (to vrllaoers, pushing them all away). go away! go away ! get out of this—get out of this ! serg. (ducking). why, martha, what’s the matter ? martha. don’t be frightened, sergeant—i don’t mean it. i tried with my three servants just now to make the old lady go, and she compels us to turn everybody out of my inn until further notice ! why i shall be ruined! go away-—get out of this! [to one and all in succession. boom. allow me, ma’am, to offer you a guinea. martha. certainly; thank you—goaway. boom. another. ' martha. thank y u—go away. (to the others.) go away- get out of this—go away. pipette (to sergeant). kiss me, kiss me! peter (to sebgeant). come on, come on! serg. don’t, don’t, don’t ! martha. go away ! go away—get out of this—go away ! boom. allow me to offer you a guinea. [to all in succession. enter old lady from inn—they all rush to her. martha (pushing her). go away—go away ! villagers. get out of this-—go away_l peter. ‘come on, come on! serg. (apart from the others). don’t, don’t l . pipette. kiss me ! kiss me! [trying to kiss old lady. boom. allow me to offer you a guinea. [they hustle her about the stage. . lady. stop! stop! stop! (they all desist.) i release you all. (all relapse.) i can manage you separately, but altogether you’re too many for me ! the spell is removed! martha. then you’ll go ? . lady (sulkily). yes--— ’ll go. pipette (to sergeant). then you’re not a coward ? serg. a coward ? no! and you don’t want to kiss every- body ? pipette. kiss everybody ? no ! (to peter.) and you’re not a brave man ? peter. a brave man? no! ( to martha.) and you don’t want to turn everybody out of your inn ? martha. out of my inn ? no ! ( lb boomnlehaent.) and you don’t want to give everybody a guinea ? i abo!om. give everybody a guinea? no, l’l be hanged if caaatures of impulsa. all. o. lady. all. finale. go away, ma'am, go away, ma'am, go away, ma'am, good day ! defeated and ill-treated, i'm vindictive as you'll find, so prepare you, for to spare you i am not at all inclined ! go away ma'am, &c. [they hustle her out of the gate. curtain. randall’s thumb. a n or/g/nal comedy in three acts. first performed at the opening of the royal court theatre, under the management of miss m litton, th january, . dramatis personze. dr. trotzvay mr. h. m \:i,l ~r. jon bangles . mn. edward r cmrofl randall, an adventurer mr. w. belford buckthorre, under his thumb mn. hermann vnzm mr. scantlenury, on his honeymoon mr. fmmx matt -ncws. mr. fumnoys, an old stager mr. astuzzy. cumming, a waiter ... . . mr. parry cumcn, a superintendent qf police... mn. jzmv s emma temrle, dr. trotway’s niece mlss kate bishor mas. scnvrliznunr mas. sn:r mus. mlss srnm ... m ss maggie brennan. mns. flamnoys miss eleanor burrou. act i. . gardens of beachington_ hotel. act ii. the clump rocks. act iii. gardens of beachington hotel. scenery by mr. bnnmwoon po' "rs and assistants. modern seaside d -esaes. randall’s dress rather seedy will pretentioua. ‘time in representation : two hours and a half. r./\nd’all’s thumb. act i. scene.—gardens of beachington hotel. entrance to hotel, l. ; garden table and two chairs, r. ; table and chair, l. ; gong at entrance to hotel; visitors’ book on r. table ,' entrance to hotel garden, . ; sea view. mr. and mes. flamnoys discovered sitting at table, r., but apart as if they had guarrelled—enter mn. bangles, from hotel. bangles. ha, flamboys! how d’ye do, mrs. flamboys? (aside) hallo, another rowl it’s a most extraordinary thing that these young people should quarrel as they do. flamboys is a capital fellow. mrs. flamboys is a pretty and agreeable woman. and they don’t speak half-a-dozen words a day. flamboys (yawning). oh dear! oh dear! it’s awfully slow here! say, bangles, don’t you find it awfully slow? bang. slow ? no! flamb. ah, you’re a single man, that makes all the difference at a watering place. bang. it does make a difference, no doubt, but it seems to me that the advantage is all on your side. (bowing to mes. flamboys.) flamb. unsophisticated soul! may that fond delusion never be disturbed. you’re a bachelor—takc an old stager’s advice and keep so. [mns. flamnoys rises, in a hulf, and retires up. bang. (crossing to flamboys). my boy, i don’t like to hear any man talk like that. it’s excusable in a half-fledged griff, with a pocket full of dangerous money and a body full of dangerous tastes, but a married man who speaks as you speak is a traitor to his order. you've taken the shilling—stick to ra ndall’.s‘ thumb. your colours like a man—and don’t damn the service because you don’t happen to hit it off with your commanding officer. flamb. my dear fellow, who does hit it off with his com- manding officer ? . bang. bosh! that’s the foolish fast sham-cynical cant of the day. i’ve heard many a youngster speak as you speak, and i’ve lived long enough to see nearly all of them happy husbands and happy fathers. those who stick to the professions of their youth are those whom no decent woman would have. mrs. flamboys. but it seems strange that so ardent an advocate of married life should have lived single so long. bang. it’s no fault of mine, mrs. flamboys-—i should have been married thirty years ago, if i’d had my way—to a lady twenty years older" than myself! perhaps it‘s as well that i didn’t. flamb. quite, i’m sure. bang. but i’ve turned the corner some time now, and l.’ n going down-hill pretty quickly, and i—l often wish, mrs. flamboys, that i had some one to put the skid on for me, and let me down easily. an old man feels the want of a wife more than a young one does, depend upon that. ll’s no joke to look forward to a solitary old age with death in apartments at the end of it; and the only symptom of regret, the demand made by your landlady on your executors for compensation on account of the house having got an ill name from your having died in it. _ __ ftamb. well, ‘if an old stager’s example can be of any service in inducing you to come to a practical conclusion‘ on the subject, you’re quite welcome to it! how longdo you propose to stay at" beachington '? . _ bang. stay? all the autumn—all the winter, perhaps. it’s a delightful place. by jove, sir, it suits me down to the ground. ‘ when i see a face i like, i want to speak to it; and at beachington one can do that without fear of a snub. i‘ve lived in london for the last three months, and i havcn’t made three acquaintances. i have been here three weeks and i’ve made thirty. i like most faces. by jove, i like yours-— though you do talk infernal nonsense. [shaking hands with fnnrnoys. mrs. '. (seated). strange taste! ‘ bang. and i like your wife’s. flamb. you’re easily satisfied. bang. i don’t dislike scantlebury’s face. mrs. f. and mrs. scantlebury’s? bang. well—yes, and mrs. scantlebury’s. rand/ ll’s thumb. mrs. f. take care, mr. bangles—she’s a bride! bang. oh, don’t misunderstand me—it’s purely aesthetic— purely msthetic. i admire mrs. scantlebury as i admire a‘ painting. mrs. f. oh, i see! if you look upon mrs. scantlebury as a work of art, i admit that there is some ground for your admiration. bang. ha, ha! you’re severe on the bride, mrs. *‘lamboys— but i say—how does she do it? mrs. f. indeed i don’t know—you had better ask mr. scantlebury. flamb. oh, he doesn’t know. he’s not been married long enough. husbands learn these things slowly and by degrees. mr. scantlebury has only been married a fortnight, and i suppose that at the present moment he’s at that stage of dis- covery which takes the form of a puzzled wonder why the deuce his wife will keep her dressing case locked. he’ll find out all about it some day. at least i did. mrs. f. mr. flamboys ! how dare you say such a thing? flmnb. well, and whom else do you admire? there’s trotway. ' bang. oh, jack trotway, of course. why, jack trotway is the oldest and dearest friend i have in the world. we were at school together—wa ked guy’s together—entered the service together as assistant surgeons—left it together as inspectors of hospitals. flamb. and miss temple, his niece? bung. edith temple ! yes, yes! god bless her—i like edith temple’s face. oh yes, i like edith’s face. mrs. f. well, then there’s miss spinn. _ bang. well, and l like—no, hang it, i do not like miss spinn. [takes stage, r. mrs. f. but that’s very ungrateful, mr. bangles, for i’m sure she likes you. why you are always together! bang. always together, iua’am ? we are siamese twins in everything but physical union! if we were physically united, a surgical operation might separate us; as it is, i’m not aware of any operation—surgical or otherwise—that will keep us asunder. that woman’s the pest of my life. flamb. i wonder you stand it. bang. stand it? confound it, you don’t want me to strangle the woman, do you ? flmnb. no, that would be an extreme measure. i shoulnln’l'. try that until all other means had failed. bang. all other means have failed. sir, the woman is too a aawda l’.s. z.a. uma. old a hand. she comes to attack me armed with an experience which i suppose is utterly unexampled. what is a simple- minded indian to do with a woman who in her time has been a governess, a lady's companion, a crimean nurse, a columbine, a missionary, a vivandière, a stewardess, and a bloomer ? enter miss spinn from hotel. miss s. talking about me, mr. bangles, as usual? (aside to bangles.) oh, you indiscreet man | bang. yes, ma'am i have been talking about you. i'm not aware there are any secrets between us. miss s. (aside to bangles). very judiciously passed off. (aloud.) secrets? certainly not... i haven’t a secret in the world! yes, mrs. flamboys, in my time, i’ve been everything, by turns flamb. except a wife. miss s. and nothing long. bang. except a spinster. mrs. f. (mischievously). do you know, miss spinn, i often wonder that, with your love of change, it has never entered your head to get married? mr. bangles was just saying so as you came in bang. i, ma'am . hang it, mrs. flamboys miss s. dear joe' (aside to bangles.) oh, you imprudent boy ! (aloud.) mrs. flamboys, i will tell you a secret. (confidentially.) it has entered my head to get married ! [exit bangles, unperceived. mrs. f. impossible ! miss s. but true. over and over again i have said to myself, “it is my duty to marry.” but whom? there's my difficulty. flamb. yes—i see your difficulty. miss s. he must be a good man—he must be a rich man— he must be a man of exquisite taste, and his admiration for me must be unbounded. now, it isn't easy to find this combination of qualities in one individual. flamb. that i can quite understand. miss s. exactly. above all, he must be furiously jealous in order to—to— mrs. f. to curb your love of change? miss s. exactly. when i find such a man, i will throw "f into his arms and i will say, “take me, and be happy!” * f. but, would not that be rather abrupt? s. what, the remark? oh, of course, as i put it; but suming that he has led up to it, aaazza/l’.s zzuma. flamb. but that's begging the question. miss s. oh, but that's often done. flamb. i believe it is. it was in my case. mrs. f. mr. flamboys! - flamb. ah! [sighs. mrs. f. ah! (sighs.) brute! miss s. um! pleasant people, these. (aloud.) but, mr. bangles—where's mr. bangles? flamb. gone. - miss s. gone? why, do you know, i came here on purpose to find him? - flamb. no! miss. s. i did, indeed. i’m organising a pic-nic to the clump rocks this day week, and i want mr. bangles to help me. mrs. f. well, miss spinn, mr. bangles went off very quietly, directly you came. miss s. very quietly? mrs. f. very. miss s. as if he didn't want to be observed? flamb. exactly. miss s. sly old gentleman—he meant me to follow him. silly fellow; as if there's anything to be ashamed of in our liking each other's society. but these indians are so sly. which way did he go? into the grove? thank you. good morning. exit miss spinn—mr. and mrs. flamboys rush to each other's arms. - flamb. my darling—now, at last, we are alone! [kisses her. re-enter miss spinn—they disengage. miss s. i beg your pardon—i forgot to ask if i might put your name down? flamb. oh, certainly. miss s. and mrs. flamboys? flamb. (brusquely). oh, she doesn’t want to go. she's got nothing to go in. besides, a pic-nic is no fun, when one's wife's there. mrs. f. indeed, but i shall go, if i have to wear my alpaca. put me down, if you please, miss spinn, as well as mr. flam- boys. (to flamboys.) brute! miss s. that's right. it will be delightful if we have a fine day. now for mr. bangles. [exit miss spinn. mrs. f. there now—she saw you kiss me ! it'll be all over the hotel! . rajvdalzjs thumb. flamb. but, my darling pet, you are my wife ! mrs. f. certainly, dear. but husbands don’t avail them- selves of every opportunity of kissing their wives after they have been married five years. it’s all very well at first, but people cool down. flamb. ah, it’s so difficult to remember the dreary fiction that we’ve been married five years, in face of the delightful fact that we’ve only been married three weeks. mrs. f. but you must try, my pet, you must indeed. only think, if it should be known in the hotel that we are on our honeymoon tour ! why we shouldn’t have a moie t’z peace ! flamb. it would be extremely awkward. well, l’ve done all i can. l’ve quarrelled with you over and over again in public. i’ve worn the oldest boots i could find. l’ve flirted with every woman i’ve come across. i’ve constantly referred to our numerous family, and i’ve never lost an opportunity of eating sake and onions. mrs. f. my pet, how good of you! (kissing him.) our numerous family! _ flamb. yes—four! both. ha, ha! mrs. f. now, mind— insist on your being extremely rude to me on all public occasions. you must say the unkindest things about my dress, and my complexion, and my hair—and you must snub me whenever you’ve an opportunity. flarnb. my love, i’ll be a perfect brute! mrs. f. i’m sure you will. think how much annoyance and observation we save ourselves by such a course. look at those two ridiculous old donkeys, the scantleburys, who are always advertising the fact that they are honeymooning, although she’s sixty, if she’s a day! look at them, with their arms round each oter’’ waists, as if they were two-and-twenty! it’s positively indelicate! fiumb. ah ! there are no fools like old ones ! enter mn. and mns. scan' ‘lebury,f ldli/zg. scant. now, my darling, i must insist on your wearing a shawl—it’s too cold to be out without one. ah, mrs. flam- boys ! assist me in persuading frederica that she will certainly catch cold, if she doesn’t wrap herself up. ' mrs. f. (seated). oh! i couldn’t presume to dictate to a lady of mrs. scantlebury’s age ! besides, it is not a cold day. flamb. not cold ?—it’s freezing! mr. scantlebury is quite right! it’s all very well for you to go about as you do- aaawdall’s thump. you're a mere girl! but when you're mrs. scantlebury's age you'll know better, won't she, scantlebury? scant. (aside). these persons are very insufferable ! mrs. f. and when mr. scantlebury has been married as long as we have, he will only trouble himself about one circumstance connected with mrs. scantlebury's toilette. scant. and that is—? mrs. f. that it is regulated with a due regard to economy. such, at least, is my experience. [looking savagely at flamboys. flam. there you are—at it again nag—nag—nag—all day long ! mrs. f. then you should give me something fit to wear ! will you believe me, mrs. scantlebury, when i tell you that he hasn’t give me a single dress since my marriage? i am positively wearing out my trousseau at this moment! scant. oh, flamboys! i'm ashamed of you! mrs. scant. oh, mr. flamboys, we're ashamed of you! flamb. ah! wait till you’ve been married five years! you are young at it just now, and you’re carried away by en- thusiasm. it's astonishing how that sort of thing dies out ! mrs. scant. horace, assure me that this sort of thing will not die out. tell me that you will always—always—always— love me as you do now ! scant. frederica, do you doubt me? mrs. scant. no-i cannot doubt those eyes! [gazing at him. scant. my own | mrs. scant. my love! flamb. (aside). old fools! (aloud.) ah! when i married, scantlebury, i believed in all that. mrs. f. so did i—but i have been bitterly undeceived ! oh, mrs. scantlebury it is a pleasant thing to dream that the honeymoon is to last for life!—but it is a terrible thing to awake and find that you have married an icicle ! [weeps. mrs. scant. horace, is it possible that you are an icicle in disguise ? scant. if i were, what would become of me before the blaze of those radiant eyes? mrs. scant. go, flatterer. scant. my own | mrs. scant. my love flamb. oh, this is intolerable ! scant. mr. flamboys, you must excuse us if we are a little effusive. this is the most interesting period of our existence. i dare say now that, under similar circumstances, you went on just as we do now? iv. z rand/ ll’.s' thumb. bandl of course you don’t—it’s a devilish serious position for you. but don’t you find it amuses your friends? scant. n o, sir, i do not find that it amuses my friends. rand. they must be dull dogs. scant. i believe there is nothing to be ashamed of in the fact that i am on my honeymoon ? rand. nothing at all. quite the reverse. it’s very credit- able to you at your time of life. scant. society, sir, i believe, could not be carried on without honeymoons. rand. quite out of the question. you’re a martyr in a good cause. soant. (aside). this fellow is laughing at me. he shall see that i’m not to be trifled with. (crosses to r.—then aloud.) good morning, sir. [eaz:it. rand. ha, ha! (refers to book.) “joseph bangles, m.d., late bengal army. dr. trotway and niece.” good. (aside) they are here. ba. (coming down). well, now that you’ve brought me all the way down to beachington, perhaps you’ll let me know what you want with me. band. i want you to help me to carry out a scheme by which i shall make a pot of money. buck. suppose i refuse ? rand. but you won’t refuse; you can’t help yourself. do you remember the night of the th of august, ‘. buck. i’m not likely to forget it. rand. probably not. we don’t commit murders every day. at least, i don’t. buck. it was no murder, and you know it. i was attacked by a stranger in the dark, at the edge of banton cliffe, and in self-defence istruck at him with a sword-stick. rand. you did. he fell over the cliff and was killed. at my suggestion you left england that night. the body was found, and your victim turned out to be a highly respectable commercial traveller named peters, and a coroner’s jury having the fact of the sword-thrust strongly before their eyes, returned a verdict of “ wilful murder” against some person or persons unknown. baa. in the sight of heaven i am innocent. rand. no doubt. but in the sight of the law you are guilty. a reward of three hundred pounds is offered for your apprehen- sion. i could earn that three hundred pounds this evening. i am extremely hard up. the letters you wrote to me from dijon, identifying you with the man who caused his randall thumb. ; death, are in my pocket, and the local police station is next door. buck. you know that i am innocent of any crime. rand. stop. w hat do you understand by the word “ crime ” ? buck. an offence against the law. rand. childish! a crime is that unfortunate combination of circumstances which induces a jury to return a verdict of guilty. believe me, i speak from experience. but don’t be afraid. i don’t intend to inform against you. i want you: you are very valuable to me. buck. you are very good. ra-rid. not at all. buck. well, perhaps not. rand. i am sure not. now for the work that i want you to do. buck. disagreeable, i suppose ' rand. very. there’s an extremely nice girl with thirty- eight thousand pounds, stopping in this hotel, and i want you to make love to her. buck. why don’t you do it yourself? rand. do you think i should be successful? buck. (looking at him coolly). n o. why am i to do this? rand. to explain that, i must go back to the history of my marriage. buck. i thought you were a bachelor? rand. so do a good many others—but i’m not. buck. heaven help your wife! rand. heaven has. she is no more. buck. was she pretty ? rand. very. buck. what did she die of? rand. old age. baa. you said she was pretty ? rand. she was—but that was long before i was born or thought of. i met her at beachington three years ago—she was then seventy-nine. she was a very afiectionate old lady; and, as i found that she had money, i proposed to her then and there, and then and there she accepted me. within three days we were married. buck. sharp work! rand. it was sharp. but when the bride is seventy-nine, time is of the essence of the contract. two hours after the ceremony, the tranquil joys of my honeymoon were inter- rupted by the information that i was wanted for felony. i bolted, it/l¢vdal.l’s thumb. enter de. trorrway, through . from .», smoking. (atoud.) i’m going round to the post-ofiice. i shall be back directly. have you a light? (crossing to l.—taking out cigar case). buck. n . you know i don’t smoke. trot. allow me to offer you one. [ fers lighted cigar. rand. thank you. eh! not dr. trotway ? trot. yes. should i know you ? rand. i had the pleasure of meeting you, many years ago, at your regimental mess in—in-—- trot. kurrachee ? rand. kurrachee. you sat vice, i remember. don’t remember me, i dare say. no! i had no whiskers then. this is my old chum, reggy buckthorpe—late th. we shall meet at dinner, i dare say. good morning ! _ [emit randall through gate, ., and of, l. trot. don’t know his face; don’t want to. friend seems a decent fellow. (aloud) th—el_ —mr. buckthorpe? knew them very well in the punjaub; but that’s before your time. back. yes, i joined in ’ —left in ’ . trot. half-pay? back" no. sold out. trot. (aside). bad! buck. hard up. trot. good! like a man who owns to that. enter enith. edith. uncle, this pic-nic promises to be a great success. buck. (astonished). edith! edith. mr. buckthorpel buck. how strange that we should meet thus ! trot. eh ? why, what’s this ? you are old friends ? edith. oh yes! i had the pleasure of knowing mr. buck- thorpe some years ago, before papa’s death. i then went to india, and we have never met since. i am very glad to see you. trot. so ami. i don’t know you, sir; but as a friend of my poor brother’s i am heartily glad to make your acquaint- ance. are you making a long stay ? back. well, yes—so ne weeks, i think. trot. 'l‘hat’s right! then we shall see something of each other. imust be off to join bangles. we are going to take shootings here, and we shall be delighted to give you a gun. randalds thumb. good morning, mr. buckthorpel you and edith can talk over. old times. [emit trotway, r. u. e. buck. this is a strange meeting, edith ! edith. it is, indeed, mr. buckthorpe! buck. mr. buckthorpe! edith. yes; we are merely friends now. buck. are—are you married ? edith. no. buck. are you engaged? edith. no. bitck. then you have quite ceased to love me ? edith. you have no right to ask me that. my poor father forbad me even to speak to you again. he is dead. buck. so i heard. he was very hard on me. edith. he was very just. buck; yes; but it is as hard to distinguish extreme justice from extreme injustice, as to distinguish extreme heat from extreme cold. i was a penniless spendthrift, and i suppose he was right; but it would have made a good man of me, if i had married you. edith. was he to know that ? buck. n ; but you knew it. edith. i believed it. i am sure i could have influenced on. y buck. why, from the first day i saw you, my life changed. during the six months that our acquaintance lasted i was an altered man. you loved me then—i know you did. was amazed—astounded when i learnt this; it opened out a pro- spect of a new and changed life to me; it had never entered my head that a good and pure woman could love such a man as i. i have known so few, edith; and those i have known have treated me as a hopeless outcast. edith. oh, mr. buckthorpe! buck. they have had good reason to do so. i had been left to my own ways all my life, to make what associates i pleased, and when i entered the service, i was banished to a foreign station where time hung heavily on my hands, and where the devil of mischief had full opportunity of working his worst with me. under different auspices i might have been a different man—i am sure of this, from the influence that association with so pure and good a woman as you had over me. oh, edith, i am a miserable fellow ! (sits at table.) edith. i—i am truly sorry to hear you say this. mr. buckthorpe, you pain me deeply. buck. after your father dismissed me from your presence, i r‘andall’s thumb. ; lived on in hope that ciroumstances—i knew not how-—might bring us together again. but he died, and you had to join your uncle in india, and the sun went down on the only bright day my miserable life had known! edith. mr. buckthorpe, it is not fair to tell me all this. i/vhen i told you that i loved you, i knew nothing of your past life—you seemed to me to be all thata man should be. i loved you, because you realised my dream of what a man should be; but when i learnt the circumstances of your past career, my eyes were opened to the folly of my dream, and if you had died on the day that i owned my love for you, i should not have suffered greater anguish. [sits. buck. but, edith, you could not say this to me if you had wholly ceased to love me. edith. mr. buckthorpe, do not mistake me; i love the memory of an ideal man. the man i love has no existence— he never lived. i loved the man whom i believed reginald buckthorpe to be. buck. i was a good man when we parted— may say so now; for i am good no longer. i look back on those six months in my life as on an episode in the life of another man. edith, have pity on me— give me another chance. edith. no ; i am bound by my father’s wishes. he is dead. buck. he is dead, and therefore cannot recall his words. he knew nothing, except that my career had been wild, reckless, extravagant. he attributed my altered life to interested hyp crisy—because you had wealth, and i was poor. but when he knew me, i was indeed a changed man. edith, you loved me. where is the man whose heart would not be purified by such love as yours ? [edith appears undecided how to act. enter randall from l. and through c. rand. (aside to buoktuoni>n). very good. buck. what do you mean ? rand. i mean very good. i mean that you’ve lost no time —you’ve been going it, you babe of nature ! buck. i don’t understand you. rand. don’t you ? i mean that you’ve lost no time in commencing operations. this is the young lady whose thirty- eight thousand pounds i claim. buck. edith temple ? rand. exactly. didn’t you know that ? introduce me. buvk. she is a lady. raivdalzys t h u/vb. rand. you‘d better do as i tell you. buck. (reluctantly). miss temple—mr. randall. [retires ujo. rand. miss temple, i had the pleasure of knowing your uncle, doctor trotway, in india, some years ago. edith. indeed ? rand. yes, we renewed our acquaintance this morning. (t buckthorre.) i had no idea that miss temple and you were acquainted. edith. yes, we are old friends, but we have not met for son_ e years. rand. (aside). this simplifies matters. young people who are old friends, and who haven't met for some years, generally get very confidential when they do meet. enter miss srinn and bangles. miss s. well, we’ve settled all preliminaries. there are three carriages, and a donkey cart, which i amgoing to drive. edith. how many names have you, miss spinn ? . ' mz'ss s. (referring to list). sixteen. [edith and buckthorre retire up. rand. (crossing to miss sr nn). have you really got sixteen names? fifteen of ’em aliases ! that beats me hollow. miss s. i really have! and i want one more to be com- plete. bang. (aside). i know you d —mine! but you won't get it. (aloud.) perhaps these gentlemen will join you ? rand. certain y—eh, buckthorpe ? miss s. oh, but that’s two, and it will throw out all my arrangements. never mind, mr. bangles, you and i will charter the donkey cart. bang. impossible! miss . why? bang. i don’t enjoy riding in donkey carts, besides we should never keep pace with the others, we should drop behind. ' miss s. (tenderly). a little, perhaps—half a mile or so-not more. that wouldn’t matter a bit! bang. it would spoil the whole thing, ma’am. it’s the essence of a thing of this kind that all should arrive at the same moment. miss s. then we two will start an hour before the others, and get everything ready-—there it’s quite settled, mr. bangles, that i take you in my trap. ra vdall’s t /mb. rand. (aside). egad, it looks like it! bang. no, no—it would be better if edith and i were to go together, eh—edith ?-—and—- miss s. wouldn’t do at all. it would never do to take the only young unmarried lady out of the party. besides, what would people think ? now two old fogies like us can do what we like ? bang. i wish we could. .miss s. mr. bangles, i’m shocked at you! there, that’s all settled, and if these gentlemen will give me their names— — rand. mr. randall—mr. buckthorpe. buck. excuse me, i can take no part in this excursion. i leave for london to-night. enter dr. teotway. edith. oh, buckthorpe ! buck. i leave for london to-night. [with deliberation. rand. (aside). are you mad? trot. what’s that? you told me you intended to remain some weeks. . buck. circumstances have occurred which render necessary my immediate presence in london. there is a chancery suit —involving my succession to a large fortune rand. but you knew of that this morning, my bloating lambkin, you knew of that this morning. edith (aside). is this on my account ? buck. it is. edith. then, on my account, stay. bacl. i eannot—y u don’t know all ! rand. i think on reflection you will see that this haste is unnecessary. (takes him aside.) if you attempt to leave this place until i give you permission, i will place your letters in the hands of the local poliee—you know me well. (aloud) ladies and gentlemen, i have the pleasure to inform you that i have convinced mr. buckthorpe that his intended departure is un- necessary. he will have much pleasure in joining your party ! . ibazvdallls‘ thuaib. act ii. scene.—t/ clump rocks. the entrance to a large cave occupies the foreground of stage, with seashore in the distance. the entrance from l. is over large loose rocks; the entrances, r., are open; the two large detached rocks in the centre should be sufiiciently flat on their surfaces to serve as tables, and they should be surrounded with rough ledges, about eighteen inches high, to serve as seats; the small detached rock, r., should be about twelve inches high; the stage is covered with other rock-work to mask the rising of the water. servai\" ‘s discovered arranging lunch, superintended by miss srini\'——bangles sitting moodily apart, endeavouring to turn out a jelly. miss s. well, mr. bangles, how are you getting on with that 'elly ? j bang. ma’ain, the confounded thing won’t come. miss s. put it back into the warm water. (coming down.) mr. bangles, i often think that i’m very like a jelly. a good and clever husband might melt me down and pour me into any mould he pleased. bang. ma’am, it’s a privilege of which he would be certain to avail himself at the earliest opportunity. but i don’t think you'd “turn out” well. jlliss . yes i should, dear. a little gentle warmth—such as i apply to this jelly. bang. gentle warmth ? nothing short of perpetual hot water would do it. ' miss s. (crossing to banoles). and would you try the hot water ? bang. i would, indeed, ma’am. miss s. (earnestly). perpetual hot water ? bang. perpetual hot water. miss is. hot water that would not cool down as time went on; water that would be always, always hot? bang. ma’am, it would be as hot as fire could make it.. a iss s. ardent soul! we will talk of this again. bang. really, miss spinn miss s. oh, joseph, i am so happy ! bang. hold up, ma’am, pray—this is extremely awkward. they are coming, ma'am, and we shall be caught ! miss s. you are right, we must be discreet—we must be very-—very prudent. i am not angry-—indeed i am not angry, . . ./vdall’s ihumb. you imprudent headstrong boy! there, hush, they are coming; we will speak of this again at a more convenient time. oh, joseph, i am so happy l enter dn. teotway and me. and mas. flamboys, over rocks. bang. miss spinn, i—that woman would extract a proposal of marriage from the pope of rome l [takes stage, r. trot. take care, mrs. flamboys, the rocks are very slippery. well, miss spinn, you have arranged everything, i see. bang. yes, miss spinn has arranged everything. trot. i always said she was a capital manager. bang. and i heartily endorse the observation ! mrs. f. here come the turtle-cloves. ah, i wonder how long it will last? [mr. and mus. i'‘l.u'uboys seat themselves in front of detached rock,’ .. enter mr. and mas. scantlebury, over the rocks. scant. come along, my angel. ladies and gentlemen, oblige me by looking the other way while mrs. scantlebury climbs over the rocks. (they do so.) n ow jump. mrs. scant. edward, if anybody is looking, i shall go and drown myself ! 'l‘here. [jumps. flamb. may we look now? scant. you may. [they stand in an attitude of embrace. all. beautiful! miss s. are we all here ? enter randall. rand. no, there's miss temple to come, and buckthorpe. i tell you what it is, i vote we don’t wait for them. trot. we won’t wait for them. it will serve them right. won’t it, bangles? miss s. oh, but that would be a pity. suppose, mr. bangles, you and i start off to meet them and hurry them on. trot. no, no, leave them alone. they must be taught that if they chose to separate themselves from the rest of the party, they must be prepared to take the consequences. (they seat thernselves—mr. and mas. scantlebury at lower rock, d z. trotway at higher 'r' ch‘—bangles on small rock, and miss srinn on hamper between bangles and mn. scantlebury— randall standing, e.) let them lunch together. rand. (aside). where shall i sit? (he makes one or two attempts to sit near mas. flamboys and mas. scantlebury, ra./vdall’s thumb. they close up to prevent his doing so.) somehow, i’ afraid i’m not z favourite here. there’s mrs. flamboys—she’s a nice little thing—black eyes, plump figure, and doesn’t get on with her husband. she’l do. (sits near mus. flamboys.) i know i’m not a pleasant person to look at, but my conversation is con- sidered sparkling. ’ll try and sparkle. (aloud) mrs. flamboys! mrs. f. yes. ‘ ' rand. (sentimentally). do you believe in first impressions ? mrs. f. sincerely. . rand. (taken aback). oh! but don’t you find that your first estimate of a man is sometimes a mistaken one? mrs. f. (with decision). never. (aside) i wish this person would go. . ifarzd. humph! cold shoulder! ' jllrs. f. mr. flamboys, if it’s not asking you too great a favour, i should like a little lobster salad. flamb. oh, hang it ! can’t you get it yourself? rand. wha_t an ill-bred boor it is. allow me, mrs. flamboys. [gives her salad. mrs. f. oh, thank you. (aside to flamboys.) i can’t touch it after that dreadful man; get me something _else— anything. ! flamb. my darling—there. [gives her c]n'c].'e'ri, mrs. f. ‘thank you, dearest. what are you eating? ' flamb. nothing. i live on love. mrs. f. my darling! flamb. my pet! trot. ha!—hem! flamb. (rudely). here, somebody give my wife somcthing-- she won’t touch anything i give her. jilrs. f. no, thank you; i’ve finished. ah, i had an appetite once! ‘ flamb. you had—enormous! mrs. f. brute! rand. (who has gone round to mrs. scantlebury). mrs.- scantlebury, do you believe in first impressions? [pathetically.- mrs. scant. (startled). bless and save the nan—what does he mean? rand. (reproachfully). ab, and you, too, give me the cold- shoulder! . mrs. scant. some cold shoulder for mr. randall. [turning away from him.- scant. certainly, randall. shall i put some mint sauce over it? ' . -* ;-'€...=__ ml raivdalds thumb. ‘ bafa . devilish odd; they don’t seem to like me at all. (aloud) thanks, i have some pigeon pie. trot. then ‘have some more. ' [gives him some. rand. is this pigeon ? trot. n , it’s rook. flamb. they go very well together, don’t they, randall? scant. it’s a great homburg dish, isn’t it, randall? trot. ‘rook and pigeon, with a good steak, is a dish you’re always glad to have a finger in, ain’t you, randall. mrs. scant. a finger? (to randall.) there’s no occasion to use your fingers, sir! allow me to hand you a fork. flamb. randall always prefers a spoon if he can get one; don’t you, randall? . scant. i can provide you with one. [ fers one. rand. i’m sure you can. thank you. scant. what do you mean by that, sir ? [rising. rand. you were born with a silver one in your mouth, were you not ? scant. well, sir, and if i was, sir-—and if i was, sir? rand. well, i meant that one. [goes round to miss srms. seant. (aside to mus. scantlebury). now, how the deuce did he know i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth. mrs. scant. he traced it in your conversation. scam‘. (angrily). frederica. mrs. scant. horace! scant. (recollecting himself). my own! mrs. scant. my love! ' flamb. scantlebury, leave your wife alone, do. mrs scant. sir! mr. seantlebury is not in the habit of letting his wife alone. if you are envious of mr. scautlebury’s happiness —- flamb. but i’m not. scant. you’re right, flamboys. mrs. scant. horace! [angrilg/. scant. frederica! mrs. scant. (recollecting herself). my love! scant. my own. . [they embrace. rand. miss spinn! [randall in the meantime has gone round to miss srnm, introducing himself between miss srnm and bangles. miss s. well? rand. do you believe in first impressions ? ' miss s. oh, i don’t believe in anything. rana’. i’m glad of that, it shows a sense beyond your years. randalds thumb. trot. young people joe—young people! we were young once, you know. bang. (sadly.) yes once. (aside) they’re always together—- on the beach, on the parade, on the pier—wherever she goes he’s sure to turn up with his confounded “miss temple, this is indeed an unexpected pleasure ! ” unexpected—bah! why, he knows her movements to a minute, and her plans for a week to come. trot. this is rather a critical moment in buckthorpe’s existence. he is expecting every minute to hear that a chan- cery suit has determined in his favour, and if it does, it will put him in possession of a considerable fortune. bang. the deuce it will! trot. yes. as edith and i were walking through beech- wood, yesterday, who should turn up of all people in the world but buckthorpe. “ dear me, miss temple,” said he, “ this is indeed an unexpected pleasure.” bang. bah ! trotway, do you ever go to the play ? trot. oh, yes; often. bang. very good. then here’s a little drama in two acts . and a moral that will interest you. act i—scene, the earth. time, sunrise. personage discovered: the astronomer-royal. the sun rises in the east. astronomer-royal speaks, “god bless my soul,” says he, “you rising in the east ? this is indeed an unexpected pleasure.” end of act . act —same scene. time, sunset. personages discovered: the astronomer- royal, and the sun about to set. astronomer-royal speaks, “god bless my soul,” says he, “you setting in the west? this is indeed an unexpected pleasure.” morn —the astro- nomer-royal’s a humbug. [emit bangles. trot. nonsense, joe, you’re hard on buckthorpe. it’s very odd that joe bangles who likes everybody should have taken such a dislike to young buckthorpe whom everybody else likes so much. i can’t account for it. enter enith and buckthosre over the rocks. trot. well, young lady, you’ve taken your time about it. we’ve lunched without you. edith. uncle, i was so tired, i was obliged to sit down. trot. well, we had to remove everything to the top of the cliff, as the tide is rising; so if you want any lunch you’d better come with me——come along buckthorpe. [exeunt tsotway and edith. as bockthoere -isfollowing them, randall enters. rand. stop-—i want to speak to you. iv. a c‘a vdall/s thumb. buck. well ? rand. well, you’ve been a week at work, and precious good running you’ve made in the time. buck. yes—pretty well. rand. nice girl, buck. yes. rand. pity she has to lose her money ? buck. it is a pity. rand. well, you’ve made good use of your time. i eouldn’t ‘ have got round her in a week as you have. buclr. oh, you’re too modest! rand. yes, i am modest. why, at this moment i know of half-a-dozen ladies—devilish fine women, too—who’d_ gi.ve a good deal to know where i am. ' buck. ladies ? rand. yes. buck. what kind of ladies i [ ontemptuously. band. landladies. don’t mistake me—it’s rent, not spoons. n o, no—jack randall is not the man to run away from that sort of thing. buds. no, he’s just the sort of man to run away with that sort of thing. . rand. what sort of thing ? buck. spoons. rand. my good friend, you don’t understand these things. i am not a strictly honest man, but i should no more think of sneaking down an area after a plate basket than you. would of sitting down to dinner with a dustman. damme, sir, pay some regard to social distinctions. if you are a swell, swindle; if you are a snob, sneak. always rob, according to your station in life. golden maxim. buck. then, by your own admission you’re a swindler. rand. i’ a chess-player. buck. but you cheat. rand. no—i finesse. buck. i don’t understand the distinction. rand. i’ll make it clear to you. . have a scheme to take your queen. to effect this, i arrange that my bishop shall occupy this square-—my knight that, my rock that,.and so forth. if you’re.a skilful player you detect my scheme and prepare to bafileit; if not, i gain my end. and because i don’t explain my tactics beforehand, you kick the board over. back. your games generally end that way, don.’t they ? ?¢md- generally. the art of losing with a good grace is an ii’/i n )al.l’s thu/p ’. accomplishment which is very generally neglected. i often wish it was otherwise. buck. no doubt. rand. but let’s get to business. what have you gathered from this girl about my lamented wife? buck. nothing. rand. not yet ? baa. no, not yet ? rand. then, as time’s getting on, and as i have very good reasons for not stopping here longer than is necessary, i think you’d better begin. buck. oh, you think that ? rand. yes, i do. look here, buckthorpe, i’m not going to stand any nonsense—i’ve got my fingers round your throat, and one squeeze will choke the life out of you. this eyening i must know all about this wife of mine—yo_u’ve got about an hour to do it in; you’d better begin at once. here comes the girl. i shall be within hearing, so you’d better be careful. buck. i would rather you did not listen. rand. no doubt; but i shall. [randall goes behind rock as enrth enters. edith. mr. buckthorpe, do you know where my uncle is ? buck. no; i have not seen him. edith. saw some one with you—— buck. yes—mr. randall. edith. oh! is mr. randall a great friend of yours ? [they sit—edith on lower rock with her back to randall, buckthorre on higher rock facing him. baa. no, he’s not a great friend of mine. edith. is he—you’ll think it a strange question—is he a very nice man ? buck. no, he’s not a very nice man. edith. he doesn’t look at all nic‘. buck. he is not at all' nice. (randall attempts to go.) it’s about two years since your aunt, miss brackenbury, died? [randall stays. edith. just two years, poor old lady. buck. so randall told me. edith. how in the world does he knowanything about her ? buck. he is a very well informed man. . edith. indeed ? he looks like a—a—you don’t mind my speaking openly about him ? buck. not at all. i like it. edith. he looks like a—.what do you call those people at fairs and races ? rand/lll’s ' ‘!!!/‘mb’. buck. punch and judy man ? edith. no, swell mob. surely he is not a gentleman ? buck. most surely not. edith. then how is it that you and he are so much together ? you are so entirely different. he is the worst looking man i ever saw. [randall going. buck. i’ll tell you all about that, some day. how old was your aunt when she died ? [randall stops. edith. seventy-nine. buck. so randall told me. edith. mr. randall seems to know a great deal about my aunt. buck. it is part of mr. randall’s profession to know a great deal about a great many people. edith. his profession ? is he at the bar ? buck. very often. he is a swindler-—a forger-—an adventurer—a low-bred thief, and an utterly unmitigated scoundrel l [emit raunall. buck. (rising). edith, that man has a terrible hold upon me. he has evidence which implicates me in a crime of which he knows me to be utterly innocent, and he threatens to make that evidence public if i withdraw from his society. edith (rising). a crime? buck. a crime of which, before heaven, i am utterly innocent! i have been weak, imprudent, selfish, dissipated, but my honour, as honour is esteemed by the world, is still unstained. edith. i am sure of it. quite, quite sure of it. but is there no prospect of your being able to shake off the influence of this fearful man i reginald— am—i am rich—forgive me for what i am going to say—i am rich, and my money is at your disposal. will you let me help you ? baa. edith, you have it in your power to help me as no other soul on earth can help me. there is a help that you can give me for which i, who do not often pray, will pray night and day—the help of your companionship—of sweet association with one as good and pure as you. edith, give me this hope—- tell me that, weak, wicked as i have been, i am not beyond the reach of your mercy ! . edith. who am i, reginald, that i should set myself up as a judge of your conduct ? i have been so hedged about from the very approach of temptation, that i can only guess at the meaning of the word. i have been jealously guarded through life, by strong, and wise, and loving counsellors. i have never had one wish thwarted. i have revelled in the happiest life ra./vdall’s thumb. that this world can bestow, and shall i sit in judgment upon you who have been left from boyhood to your own courses— turned adrift into the world without friends, without counsel, and without example—to fight the world unadvised, unaided, and alone ? oh, reginald, i am more just! buck. edith, your words give me new life—new hope. i have been an outcast so long, that i had almost given up the struggle with the world in despair. edith. still the world is a good world ; you were your worst enemy—— buck. yes; god help him of whom that may be said! a brave man can grapple with an outside foe—and if he falls, he falls with honour. but when one’s deadliest enemy is locked up in one’s own heart, ever present, and ever watchful to take advantage of weakness known only to itself—his case is desperate indeed ! yes; i was my worst enemy. i knew the strength of my weakness, and surrendered to it at discretion. edith. but there is yet time. you are young and strong and brave-—you have that within you, which, under due guidance, may yet place you high among your fellows. buck. and where shall i look for that guidance—to you ? edith. reginald, i am a poor, weak, inexperienced girl—a baby in the world—untempted and untried. i do not know myself, for i have been put to no proof. i am unfitted for so great a charge ! buck. (passionately). edith, in your hands i place my life—- do with it what you will. it is my last—my only hope ! tell me that you will take it into your keeping. edith (after a pause). if you think me worthy to under- take this great charge—yes. buck. bear in mind what i am—what i have been-—an adventurer—an outcast. edith. i think only of what you will be, when you have separated yourself from the evil influences that have hitherto surrounded you. it may be within my power to help you to do that ; if it is, i will help you with all my heart, with all my soul. reginald, i will be your guide. baa. for life ? editlt. for life. [they retire up, and go of. enter mas. scantlebury and flamnoys. lrs. scant. how delightful this is, mr. flamboys! how pure—how grand-—how calm! i don’t know whether i admire the ocean most under its present peaceful aspect, or when it is lashed into fury by the demon of the storm. razvdalijs thumb. flamb. i do. when it is lashed into fury by the demon of the storm, there’s no fish for breakfast next day. mrs. scant. i’m afraid you’ve no romance, mr. flamboys. flamb. not a grain; i had plenty of it when i was your age. mrs. scant. oh, mr. flamboys, you are surely younger than i! [ba.shfully. flamb. oh, muoh—in years—but i mean matrimonially speaking. i mean when i was first married. mrs. scant. oh! flamb. but mrs. flamboys soon knocked that out of me. mrs. svamt. indeed ? flamb. yes. mrs. flamboys has no romance. she is as matter-of-fact as the multiplication table, and quite as diflicult to master. now, when i married, my conversation was so metaphorical that no one understood me. in fact, mrs. flam- boys hooked me by placing a matter-of-fact interpretation upon a flowery invitation to dance. she married me through a metaphor, and fixed me witha figure of speech. and a pretty dance she’s led me ever since. mrs. scant. poor mr. flamboys! that was enough to cure you of romance. flamb. yes, but it didn’t. after my marriage, i surrounded myself with a mamelon of metaphor-—a palladium of poetry- a fortress of figure of speech—but it was of no good, mrs. flamboys battered it all down. mrs. scant. battered it all down ? what with ? flamb. babies. four of ’em’—george, thomas, william, and john. mrs. scant. and how old are they ? flmnb. oh, i don’t know! the youngest may be ten days. mrs. scant. ten days! [astom'shed. flamb. (confused) no, no—i mean ten years. mrs. scant. ten years! [h rrz_'fied. flamb. no, no—what am i saying ? ten months—months -—months! i know it’s ten something. (aside.) i wish this woman would go. mrs. scant. poor mr. flamboys! do you know, the more i see of mr. flamboys the more i pity you. flamb. the dcuce you do !—that is-—of course—thank you —thank you sincerely. (aside.) i wish scantlebury would come and fetch her away. mrs. scant. any one can see that you are not happily mated. it is a great pity, for you are young, and—and-—good-looking. fltlmb. e ? [frightened. rand/ ll’s thumb. edward still with that horrible woman—i’m sure he’s dying to get away from her. (aloud.) come, mr. scantlebury, you must take me to my husband. scant. (getting tipsy). your husband ? never! your husband’s a brute! mrs. f. well, never mind that. scant. he’s a brute, ma’am; he's not worthy of y u—is he worthy of you ? mrs. f. n , no—perhaps not—but still scant. but still you want to go to him ? it’s a beautiful trait in your character—a beautiful trait. (drinks.) yes, this is the cup i’ve heard of. it cheers, but it don’t inebriate. i'm quite cheerful now, ma’am. flamboys is a brute—he insults his wife, and beats his children. he beats his children, don’t he ? mrs. f. oh, yes, yes! [impatiently. scant. (indignantly). he beats his children. how many are there ? mrs. f. oh, four. scant. four! i'll drink all their healths. what are their names ? lllrs. f. oh, i don’t know. scant. don’t know? that’s nonsense. mrs. f. oh, jane, emma, mary, and kate. scant. jane, emma, mary, and kate! beautiful names! god bless ’em all. [drinks. mrs. f. now, mr. scantlebury, once for all, i must insist on your rejoining mrs. scantlebury. scant. never mind mrs. scantlebury. i’ve plenty of mrs. scantlebury at home. it’s astonishing how soon one gets sick of mrs. scantlebury. she’s a fine woman, but a very little of mrs. seantlebury goes a long way. i wish a great deal of mrs. scantlebury would go a long way—and stop there! mrs. f. mr. soantlebury! is this the way you speak of a wife to whom you haven’t been married three weeks ? scant. three weeks. thirty-five—(recollecting.) yes, three weeks ! she’s too good for me, mrs. flamboys. it’s too much happiness for one man! she’s a noble woman, ma’am, and l’ve much pleasure in drinking her health. take me to her! i’ll allow you to have the pleasure of taking me to her ! mrs. f. thank goodness, here she is. . enter mrs. soautlebury with flamboys, l. bis'c¢ znt. just as we were getting on so com-com-oomf, a y ' ra./vdalles thu/lib’. own just now! be off, and do your worst, for as there’s a heaven above us, i’ll do mine ! rand. buck thorpe, if i consulted my personal feeling towards you, i’d take you at your word to-night. if i spare you till to-morrow, it is because it is to my interest to give you one more chance. if you have not procured the information i want by twelve o’clock to-morrow, you’re a dead man. i give you this chance—not out of any consideration for you, whom i would gladly see dead at my feet—but because i prefer thirty- eight thousand to three hundred. and one or the other i will have. good evening. [emit itanoall. buck. what have i done? (makes a movement as if to call him back.) no, no! i mustn’t let him see that i feel his power over me. i’ve taken up my position, and i must stand or fall by it. no, no; i think i’m safe. 'l‘here’s a warrant out for his arrest on a charge of forgery. i might lay information against him, if i knew details of the charge; but then he would be brought to bay, and he’d turn upon me, and this miserable affair would come to light—and then, edith! no, i can’t do that—i can’t do that. entei" miss s ‘n~n~'. miss s. mr. buckthorpe, was that mr. randall who left you iust now ? buck. yes. miss s. humph. i don’t like mr. randall a bit. buck, indeed! miss s. no. he took me to see the caves, and he wanted to give half-a-crown to the woman who shows them. buck. well, there’s no harm in that. miss s. not a bit, only—he’d forgotten his purse. buck. i see; and he borrowed yours ? . miss s. no, he didn’t. fortunately, i had forgotten mine too. now, i don’t like other people who’ve forgotten their purses. buck. and how did you settle it? miss s. i promised to make it up to her in sandwiches; but she said she couldn’t drink sandwiches. “ well, but you couldn’t drink half-a-crown,” said i. “oh, couldn’t i !” said she. and i really believe she could! enter mb. bangles and edith. but:/-‘. edith! (going to her.) iea./vdall’s thumb. bang. that woman here ? how very annoying ! [sits on lower rock. miss s. mr. bangles, why, what in the world is the matter? (aside) oh, you foolish, you foolish, jealous boy! because he’s found me here alone with mr. buckthorpe! why, you silly child, mr. buckthorpe is dying for edith! see how glad they are to get together again. why, i came here to find you. bang. to find me ? miss s. yes; i began to think you had been punished enough. bang. so i have; too much! miss s. bless your heart, i only did it to tease you. [edith and bugkthorre are seated on high rook.— bangles and miss srins on low rock. bang. (looking at buckthoere). confound the fellow—how happy he seems! and how happy she seems too! . [during this conversation the tide has risen and sur- rounded both rocks. miss s. oh, mr. bangles! the water! we’re surrounded ! bang. eh? confound it, i thought we were above high- water mark. miss s. mr. bangles, this is a trick! bang. a trick, ma’am ? miss s. yes, i see it all. it’s a planned thing to get me alone. oh, mr. bangles, this is unmanly, unmanly! what will people say ? [pretends to weep. bang. absurd! what the deuce are we to do ? miss s. if i believed that this was a planned thing to enjoy my society alone, until the tide goes down, i’d never, never speak to you again! bang. you wouldn’t ? miss s. indeed, i wouldn’t. bang. you promise that ? miss s. i do! ba’ng. then l’l confess all. it was a planned thing. i settled it with buckthorpe an hour ago. there—now keep your promise. miss s. do you really mean to tell me this ? bang. certainly; no doubt about it. miss s. oh, joe, dear joe! bang. ma’am, you said you’d never speak to me again. miss s. but i didn’t mean it, joe. _bang. (aside). i must put an end to this. (aloud.) miss splnn, $ come to the point. it’s an awkward thing to ra vdall’s thumb. have to say to a lady, but i can’t close my eyes to the fact that you seem to think that i—in short that—i propose to marry you. miss s. you do ? . bang. (decidedly). idol miss s. you propose to marry me ? oh, joseph, how good you are to ne! bang. bang the woman ! (aloud) miss spinn, let me assure you that miss s. you may call me adelaide, joe. [shylg/. bang. miss spinn—-— miss s. i say you may call me adelaide. bang. well, then, adelaide, i am sorry if my manner has conveyed a false impression, but? miss s. no, j oseph—i knew that you were very'fond of me, but i hardly expected a formal declaration so soon; still, i am not angry—indeed, i am pleased—gratified—delighted! but, give me till to-morrow to decide before i take the final and irrevocable plunge! oh, the water-—the water! mr. bangles! we shall be drowned! miss temple—mr. buckthorpe! see- we are surrounded, and i shall be drowned !—and in my new silk! buck. hallo l (sees his situation) this is awkward !—but you are quite safe. the sea is as smooth as glass, and the tide is almost at its highest. at the very worst, you’ll only get a wetting. bang. edith, you will be drowned l buck. oh no—the water never covers this rock in calm weather, except at spring tides ; but as your rock will be a few inches under water, you had better signal for a boat. bang. but you—what will you do, edith ? buck. oh, we shall be all right. i’ll take care of miss temple till the tide goes down. miss s. oh !—i'm slipping, joseph! save me !—save me ! put your arm round me—like that—there—i’m better now. oh, what shall i do ! bang. if you’ll take my advice, ma/am, you’ll take off your shoes and stockings, and walk on shore. jfliss s. mr. bangles! bang. i won’t look, ma‘am—\ pon my honour! . randall enters in boat, in front of lower roc/c. buc .‘. here’s a boat. you’re quite safe, miss spinn. ra./v )all’s n /ms. miss s. saved-—saved! (aside) that man always turns up when he isn’t wanted. bang. come, buckthorpe. rand. the boat will only hold two. buckthorpe and miss temple are quite safe, as that rock is never covered. come along, bangles. [banales and miss srinn get into the boat. miss s. oh, mr. bangles ! bang. what ? miss s. if it had only been the other rock! [they are rowed of. e’lith. how slrange to be cut off so completely from the world ! buck. and how pleasant ! here we are on a little world of our own. edith. king and queen of a tiny kingdom. buck. with this advantage over other kings and queens- that we have no subjects. ' edith. but it’s such a very little kingdom. buck. it is large enough for our wants. edith. yes, for an hour or two. how shall we pass the time? shall i be robinson crusoe-—and will you be my man friday ? buck. yes. saved by you from enemies who would have destroyed me. edith. and true and faithful to me, in return, for ever after ? buck. for ever after ! edith..very well; that's settled. now, let me see—what happened when robinson rescued friday ? buck. friday kissed robinson. edith. are you sure ? " buck. quite! [kisses her. edith. i don’t remember that. well, then friday was taught to hunt for robinson’s dinner. hunt away ! ah, i’ve puzzled you now ! buck. no. he was taught to hunt for it. teach me. . edith. i can’t do that. however, in this case, robinson is not hungry. _ buck. in other words, robinson hauls down his colours ? edith. yes. surrenders at discretion. the analogy is im- perfect. let us try something else. buck. what shall we try ? i am a storm-tossed vessel, safely anchored in the haven of your love. edith. it’s a poor haven, reginald—‘a haven that will afford you little protection against the rude winds of the outer world. €a)vdall’s thumb. buck. it is a haven of peace and rest—a haven into which sorrow, care, and trouble can never enter. see—the sun is setting, and the sorrows of my life sink with it. from this hour i live a new life-—strong in your faith—faithful to my strength. who would not be strong in the certainty of such love as yours ? edith. my love is for you, reginald, for ever and for ever. baa. i have fretted sorely under the yoke that i have had to bear, but i would have borne it patiently had i known that those words were in store for me. would bear it all again to hear you speak them once more. edith. there is no need, reginald! buck. no need, edith, for my troubles are at an end. a good, grave, and earnest life is before me, and with your help and your counsel and your example, i will lead that life. edith, at last i am at peace ! enter randall, in boat. buck. (aside) randall l (aloud) why are you here ? rand. i have come to take you off. . buck. it is unnecessary. we are high and dry above high- water mark. rand. but the wind may rise. buck. the sea is calm enough now. rand. calm enough now! but don’t deceive yourself. there’s a storm brewing for you. if you want to escape it, you must do as i bid you. act iii. sci:ne—same as act i. mus. scantlebury seated imitting.—enter mus. flamboys from hotel with little basket. mrs. f. oh, mrs. scant ebury—i have such news ! mrs. scant. news, my dear ? mrs. f. yes; edith temple is engaged to mr. buckthorpe. ‘ [sits at table. mrs. scant. engaged ? how very indelicate ! mrs. f. indelicate? mrs. scant. certainly. why, they haven’t known each other a week! it’s very bad taste. randall’s thumb. lives are brief indeed-—but then you live through your short span at his lips. i declare i envy you the few moments during which each of you usurps my place ! enter flamboys. flamb. my love! mrs. f. theodore! flamb. what are these? mrs. f. cigarettes. pretty things with a pretty name. i declare i’m jealous of them. i wish cigarettes were not feminine. ' flamb. do you think i should let you roll them if they were masculine ? mrs. f. (earnestly) i hope not, dear; i hope you love me far—far too well. i’ve been at work at them all the morning, and i’ve made forty-two. flamb. what an industrious little woman. and whom are they for ? mrs. f. can’t you guess ? enter ba moms. flamb. can’t imagine. bang. (coming forward). perhaps they are for mr. flamboys. mrs. f. (contemptuously). mr. flamboys, indeed! bang. surely they are not for yourself. mrs. f. really, mr. bangles, i hope it’s not necessary to assure you that i don’t smoke. bang. well, let me see, they can’t be for trotway. (mus. flamboys shakes her head.) for randall, then? (mus. flamboys shakes her head.) why, they must be for me! mrs. e. (reluctantly.) why, of course they must. (aside) tiresome old man. (bangles takes them—mrs. f. to flam- roys.) theodore, get them away from him, they are for you. dearest theodore, he mustn’t have them. flamb. my love, what can i do? (al u.d—crossing to banales.) i say, bangles, take an old stager’s advice, don’t you smoke mrs. flamboy’s cigarettes—they’re beastly. bang. what am i to do? i don’t like amateur cigarettes as a rule, but she’ll be offended if i refuse them. flamb. no, no; i’ll square her. (aloud.) mrs. flamboys, call these cigarettes ?—ridiculous! come along with me, ma’am, and i’ll teach you how to roll cigarettes. here's a thing! look at it, ma’am; why, it's back's broken. examine iv. a ra./vdall’s thumb. it, ma’am; it’s a deformity. taste it, ma’am. (puts it in his mouth and lights it.) it’s—it’s—it’s—oh, it’s delicious ! [emeunt mn. and mas. flursoys. bang. strange people ! they little thought when they married, four years ago, that they were taking a yoke upon their shoulders that would gall them through life. well, i’ve steered clear of that sort of thing hitherto, and now i’m going on the rocks in my old age! i’m a wicked old scoundrel to fall in love with a girl of twenty! but she’ll never know it— she’ll never know it ! i’ve kept it to myself for two years, and i suppose it will die with me. it won’t die till then! (sits at table.) enter enitu. edith. why, you’re all alone—where’s miss spinn ? bang. (at table). washed out to sea, my dear, for anything i know or care. edith. do you know i’m very glad to hear you say that? because people think that—that ‘ bang. that i intend to marry her ? edith. no, that she intends to marry you—that’s worse. now, i can’t allow any one to marry you—because-— — bang. because i’m a confirmed old bachelor, eh, edith ? edith. oh, she told you what i said, did she ? yes, because you’re a confirmed old bachelor. i should be dreadfully jealous of any one you married. [sits on stool at his feet. bang. you would ? edith. certainly. what would become of me ? bang. of you ? edith. yes, of me! why, i’ve been your little wife since i was two years old, and do you think i’m going to allow any one else to light your cheroot, or warm your slippers, or nurse you when you are ill. why, what a wicked old man you must be to think of such a thing! bang. but i never did think of such a thing, and i never shall think of such a thing. edith. never? bang. never. edith. that’s all right. then you see you are a confirmed old bachelor after all. bomg. oh, i didn’t say that. edith. but do say it. promise me that you- will never, never marry. i can’t bear to think of you as a married man. besides you are married already. bang. indeed ? . ra./vdal,l’s thumb. i edith. yes, to me. bang. 'i‘hen—you will never marry ? edith. oh, i didn’t say that. that’s quite a different thing. bang. but if you are my wife ? edith. oh yes,—no doubt i am your wife—but then, you see, you are not my husband. bang. how do you make that out? edith. why, in the first place, a husband has black whiskers —n w yours are grey. " bang. they were black once. edith. dear me! well, i suppose they were. now, that's very odd, to think that you once had black whiskers. ' ‘hey’ve always been grey ever since i can remember, and i never associated them with any other colour. i believe i thought you were born with grey whiskers. it seems so strange to think that you were ever a young man—you are such 'a thorough old fogy ! bang. i am ! a thorough old fogy ! a growling, grumbling, discontented old fogy ! a bald old fogy ! a grey old fogy ! a gouty old fogy! i’ a nice sort of fellow to talk of getting married. married! and in ten years i shan’t have a tooth in my head. married ! with an outfit of flannel bandages, silver-gilt crutches, and a cellar of antimonial wine. no, no; joe bangles’ work is done. shelve hirn-—.superannuate him»- lay him up in avender—he’s only in the way. and if he wants to be a family man, let him go a-godfathering. it’s all he’s fit for now, god help him ! it’s all he’s fit for now! [sits and covers his face with his hands. edith (who has been laughing with mn. bangles through this speech, is alarmed at his emotion). oh! mr. baugles—i hope i haven’t vexed you. i can’t bear to see you look unhappy —and i am so happy, too ! bang. you? edith. yes—i have come to tell you some news. i—i think i am going to be married. bang. married—to—to edith. to mr. buckthorpe. oh, mr. bangles, i’m so happy! bang. (aside) then it’s over. (aloud.) god bless you, my love! i-i—hope and pray that you may be sincerely happy. edith. won’t you kiss me ? bang. (kisses her). bucktborpe is a good fe low—i’m sure of it. i—i—you may not think it, my dear, but i do believe i’m delighted to hear it! . raivdalj/s thumb. enter buckthorre. buck. thank you, mr. bangles—thank you heartily l edith speaks so kindly—so afl'ectionately—of you !—her heart is so full of the unvarying love you have borne her for eighteen years, that i am overjoyed to think so old and true a friend does not appear displeased at her engagement. [emit enitn into hotel. yes, mr. bangles, i’m going to be married to edith. and that’s not all—the vice-chancellor’s decision has just been telegraphed to me, and i’m owner in fee of ardleigh park, two- thirds of a coal-mine, and thirty-eight thousand pounds consols. b.ng. my boy, i don’t know much about you—i’ve only known you a week or so——but you come of a good stock, and i hope and believe you’re the hearty, straightforward, manly fellow i take you to be. buck. mr. bangles, i must be candid with you. if i’m a straightforward fellow, my straightforwardness is only a week old. bang. eh? back. when i came _down to beachington, i was an adventurer. . bang. confound it, sir! you don’t mean to say that that dear girl’s money brought you down here ? buck. no—i came down to beachington not knowing that edith was here; and when i learnt that she was here, i also learnt that she was penniless. ba.ng. penniless! confound it, sir! it’s all very well for a man with a park, a coal mine, and devil knows how many consols, to call edith penniless; but thirty-eight thousand pounds is a pretty sum, notwithstanding. your recent good luck has enlarged your views, mr. buckthorpe. buck. edith has not one penny she can call her own. she does not know this—but knew it all along. that thief randall secretly married her great-aunt after the date of the will, and he claims all that she left. there’s a warrant against him for forgery, and so he dares not declare himself. bang. the deuce there is! let me ask you, sir, if mr. randall is a forger, how do you and he come to be together ? buck. because i am under his thumb. mr. bangles, i’ll tell you all. twelve months ago, i killed a man in self-defence. randall holds evidence which makes my crime look like wilful murder. _ bang. do i understand you to say, sir, that you are an mfernal soouudrel ? bw_’k. i didn’t say that. i've been l i! prudent wunfortuuatc.— randalzjs thumb. dissipated; but i’ve done nothing to bring me within the grasp of the law. bang. hang it, sir, you confessed to having killed this miserable man ! buck. yes, under circumstances that would have justified an archbishop in killing him. bang. it may be so, sir, and it may not. does dr. trotway know that you killed this man ? buck. no! (abashed.) bang. does edith know it ? buck. no! bang. then, sir, i shall consider it my duty, sir, to place them in possession of all the facts. bang. i have no wish to deal hardly, sir, with a young man who, having fallen, through his own weakness, is struggling to right himself in the world’s opinion and his own. but in this charge that hangs over you the question of weakness does not arise. either you murdered this man, or you did not. and i tell you this frankly—if you murdered him, i’ll hang you ! buck. mr. bangles, let me tell you this—if this accusation reaches edith’s ears, whether i am guilty or whether i am innocent, i am lost beyond redemption. bang. come, sir, l’ll make a bargain with you. i’ll tackle this fellow randall myself. i think i know how to deal with him. if i see reason to be satisfied that his charge is a true one, i give you up to justice. if i have reason to believe it is false, i place no obstacle in the way of your marriage; and if you knew all that i could tell you, you would give me credit for some forbearance in making this promise. buck. but by what means bang. leave the means to me. i think i see my way to the end i propose to accomplish. if you are innocent your innocence will appear. buck. mr. bangles, will you shake hands with me ? bang. sir, i would rather postpone that ceremony until i have put my plan into operation. here comes that unspeakable scoundrel randall. be good enough to leave me to deal with him. (emit buckteoere). here’s a devil of a business. if i tell trotway, as i’m bound in honour and in duty to do, and the charge turns out to be false, it will appear as though i were taking a dastardly revenge on a man who has cut me out. if i let the matter rest, i allow edith to marry an admitted roué and a possible murderer! . randalijs thumb. enter randall from hotel. bang. now, sir. it appears by all accounts that you are an infernal villain. rand. you’re very good. [crosses to :. bang. i’ve just learnt from mr. buckthorpe that there is a warrant out for his apprehension on what he describes as a false charge of murder; and that you hold the means of bringing him to justice. rand. did he tell you that? bang. he did. now, sir, mr. buckthorpe may be guilty or he may be innocent. if he is guilty he ought to be hanged. if he is innocent you ought to be transported. now one or other of those events i propose to bring about. rand. you will take your own course, but what the deuce has it to do with you? bang. i’ll tell you what it has to do with me. you state that you know of your own knowledge that he is guilty ? rand. undoubtedly. bang. then if you don’t act upon that knowledge you are an accomplice after the fact. i shall detain you here while informa- tion is given to the police, and i shall give you both into their custody when they arrive. rand. what! (aside) devil take him; that won’t do. they’ll spot me as the rum customer directly. (aloud with much agitation.) mr. bangles, i am a man of the world. i don’t want to hang this poor devil, buckthorpe, if i can help it. he doesn’t deserve any pity, but i can’t help pitying him. i’m an infernal tender-hearted old lamb, i know; but still i can’t help it. but, look here, if you insist upon it, ’ l go and lay information myself—there ! [going. bang. stop! i shan’t let you leave this hotel. rand. by what right do you propose to stop me ? bang. by no right at all—by main force. rand. i’ll try that. [going. bang. stop! you see this gong? (going to gong at e_‘ntrance of hotel.) if you take one step further in that direc- tion, i’ll call every man in the house to my assistance, and i will denounce you as a murderer’s accomplice! now then, one step, and—— jfand. what do you want me to do ? . bang. write a note to the superintendent here, and send it by a pmater. yes or no ? come, one, two, three! [preparing to strike. randall’s . ; band. stop ! what am i to write? bang. this. (randall sits down to write at table.) “to the superintendent, beachington police station. - ir,—a notorious criminal, a warrant for whose arrest is out— — ” rand. but——- bang. ah, would you? (prepares to strike gong.) “is staying at this hotel. send a sergeant and two strong men, and i will give him into custody.” sign it. rand. wouldn’t it be better if you signed it ? bang. no, no—i wouldn’t deprive you of the three hundred pounds reward, on any account. (randall signs it.) “ post- script—let the two men be very strong.” rand._ i say bang. ah, would you? (about to strike gong--—randall finishes note—bangle takes note, and reads.) very good. now direct i!t to the superintendent. (randall does so.) good. waiter . enter commeo, from hotel. bang. take this note to the police station directly. [randall folds another piece of paper, aside. cu’mming. police station, sir? rand. immediately. there’s no answer. bang. oh, yes—there is. a sergeant and two strong men. bring them here with you. [cumming going. rand. stop! hadn’t i better direct it to the superintendent by name? i happen to know his name. [takes note back. bang. no doubt you do. [randall writes address on blank note, and hands it to cumming, retaining the note first written. rand. there—that’s better. " bang. (intercepting the note). allow me. (reads.) “ to mr. superintendent clench.” much better. ' rand. more regular, you know. bang. much more regular. ( pens it deliberately—rand.u.l very uneasy.) bless me ! how very odd ! the writing has disappeared! blank paper ! rand. dear me! that’s very strange. bang. very strange, indeed. rand. these mistakes will happen. bang. no doubt. ha, ha! rand. ha, ha! [uneasily. bang. come, mr. randall—in the confusion of the moment you changed the papers. oblige me with the original document. ra./vd. ll’s thumb. rand. exactly. in the hurry of business, i—that’s it. confound you! bang. thank you. (gives it to cumming—¢etmz"ning blank note to randall.) allow me. now, mr. randall, you are free to go. [emit cumming. rand. to go where i please? bang. to go where you please. rand. right away? bang. right away! rand. (aside). in ten minutes the express starts for london. i can pack in two, and reach the station in five. bangles, you're a muff ! [emit into hotel. enter bockthoare. bang. well, sir, i’ve done it. buck. done what? bang. laid information. mr. buckthorpe, i don't mind owning to you that my impression is that you’re a bit of a scamp, but that you’re not guilty of this murder. you told me there was a warrant out for randall’s arrest for forgery. i’ve made him write a note to the superintendent to the effect that a notorious criminal is staying here, but i haven’t said who the criminal is, or what he’s charged with. now, if he knows you to be guilty of this murder, he’ll give you into custody, and you’ll be hanged, and serve you right. if he knows you to be innocent, he’ll be off and away before the ofiicers arrive, for fear that he should be arrested on a charge of forgery. now, sir, you stand on your own deliverance ; and—hang it—which- ever way it goes, i shall be perfectly satisfied ! [em't. buck. (sin/rs into a chair). so, the end is at hand, and in a few minutes i shall know the worst. well, it is better that it should be so, than that i should drag on a miserable existence under the shadow of that cursed scoundrel’s ban! here he comes. enter randall, with portmanteau and travelling rug, from . hotel. he's going, and i am saved! (to randall, with forcerl calmness.) why, what’s this? you don’t mean to say you’re going to leave us? rand. yes. buck. this is rather sudden, isn’t it? rand. it is sudden. buck. pressing business ? randalds thumb. rand. very. buck. can i have a word or two with you before you go ? rand. no. back. must catch the express p rand. yes. [going. bac'c then you’ve thought better of your threat? rand. for the present. back. for the present? - rand. yes; until you’re married. then, look out! good morning‘. [going, enter waiter from hotel. waiter. beg pardon, sir. i took your cheque to master. he says—very sorry, sir, but he says he can’t take a cheque in payment of your bill. rand. why, he knows me. waiter, yes, sir—that’s it—he knows you. he says—beg pardon, sir—but he says he thinks there would be a difficulty at the bank. rand. nonsense—absurd. [going. waiter. beg pardon, sir, but i can’t let you go. rand. (violently). stand away, and let me pass. waiter. bless you, sir, i’m not afraid of you. my impression is you’re like your portmanteau. (taking it.) very. big to look at, but—(shaking it)—very little in you. [waiter sits on portmanteau at the back. rand. buckthorpe, if you’ll give me a cheque for three hundred pounds, and five pounds down, i’ll give up those letters. buck. the deuce you will? vi/'hy, you’ll get that sum from the home ofiice rand. yes, but i want to go. buck. but you’ve laid information against me—they’ll want your evidence. rand. no, i don’t want to be hard on you-—l’ll let you ' at cost price. buck. can’t you do it under that—for a friend, you know ? rand (aside). they’ll be here in five minutes, and i shall be nabbed. (aloud) say a hundred pounds and a fiver down, and the letters are yours. buck. suppose we say the fiver without the hundred pounds? rand (in desperation). done—here are the letters—give me the money. (looks at watch.) in the devil’s name, man, be quick, or it will be too late. they are right enough. ra_/vdall’s thumb. buck. one moment. i don’t doubt your word, but i would rather see that they are all here. [ pens them, and counts them very deliberately. rand. there are six of them—four from dijon, and two from st. valerie. look sharp! buck. quite right. . rand. come, the money. don’t put me in a hole—i’ve acted straightforwardly in this matter, at all events. baa. you have; i congratulate you. how do you feel after it ? rand. give me the money, man, in the devil’s name— — buck. there it is, mr. randall. (gives notes.) why, how your hand shakes. ba‘' (to cumumg). give that note to your master. [going. cumming. there’s ten shillings change, sir. rand. keep the change. poor devil, you look as if you wanted it! off at last! buck. don’t go, randall. rand. why not ? buck. because i’m going to detain you on a charge of forgery. rand. the devil you are! what do you know about that charge ? buck. nothing, except that you’re wanted for it. [holds mm. rand. and do you think i can’t break away from you ? buck. on the contrary, i think you can; but i don’t think you’ve the pluck to try. (randall much disconcerted.) yvhy, you haven’t! why, you trembling cur, you dare not move an inch when a man’s hand is on your throat. rand. don’t be a fool! you’ve got your letters—let me go. buck. let you go? you—who have held an unfounded charge over me for eighteen months ?—you, who have used that charge to wring from me the miserable remnant of my shattered fortune !—you, who have used that charge to foist your cursed company on me for eighteen months !—you, who have used that charge to pull me down when i was falling, and to keep me down when i might have risen! no, no, randall —my turn’s come! [randall struggles furiously to release himself—buck- thobre forces him into a chair, and places his hand on randali/s the-oat. buck. lie still, you our !—lie still !—or, by heaven, i’l choke the life out of you! -‘and. help, help! he’ll murder me! help, help! i’a vdall’s t h u/vb . enter bangles and tnotway from hotel—they seize randall. rand. here, bangles—trotway—take this fellow off! he’s a murderer! i denounce him !—seize him !—he has letters in his pocket at this moment that suffice to hang him half-a— dozen times over. don’t let him destroy them !—he will if he can. _ buck. i have no intention of destroying them. they are here. (places them in trotway’s hands.) dr. trotway, i might have destroyed those letters five minutes ago, but i have pre— served them, in order that you might know the full truth about this miserable business. trot. mr. buckthorpe, mr. bangles has told me all. i need not tell you that the truth of your story must be established before you are allowed to see my niece again. bang. (to buckthorre). i say, you sir! buck. yes. bang. when did this so-called murder take place ? buck. on the th august, . bang. you were attacked in the dark by a man in the prime of life, and you defended yourself with a swordstick ? buck. yes, yes! _ bang. (crossing to buckthorre.) you ran your adversary through the neck ? buck yes. _ bang. j ust-—just here ? [showing a scar on his neck. buck. yes. bang. and hang it, sir, do you mean to say that a coroner’s jury ever sat on me? all. on you ? bang. yes, on me, sir—on me! buck. but it was peters —a commercial traveller. k bang. peters be hanged, sir ! it was i. i think i ought to now. buck. then you didn’t die? bang. diel who the devil says i’m dead? do i look like a dead man ? did you ever see anybody look more like a live man? i’m good for a great many years yet, sir—a great many years yet ! trot. but the coroner’s jury bang (turning round suddenly.) coroner’s jury, sirl. no coroner’s jury ever sat on me ! (to buckthorre, in afurious rage.) why, confound you, sir—how dare you ? who the deuce are you, sir, that you consider yourself justified in spread- ing such a report? what do you mean by it ? hang it, sir, explain yourself ! . . randall’’s t h u/iib. buck. but randall told me that a jury had set on the body, and returned a verdict of wilful murder against some person or persons unknown. bang. oh! randall told you! do you mean to say you are spch an infernal fool as to believe a word that fellows tells you rand. let me tell you, sir—— bang. (crossing to randall.) let me tell you, sir, that you’re a miserable imposter! let me tell you, sir, that when you say my name’s peters, and that i’m a confounded bagman, you tell a group of lies, sir—a group of lies. and when you say that i’m dead, and that a coroner’s jury ever sat on me, you anticipate matters by a great many years, sir—a great many years . trot. but how did you escape ? bang. escape ? i tumbled over the cliff, and was caught- never mind how, sir—in a most ignominious manner, halfway down, sir—halfway down. i had attacked the wrong man. i mistook him for a fellow who had robbed me, and i got the worst of it, and serve me devilish well right ! i found out my mistake, and as i was all in the wrong, and as i had to sail for india next morning, and as the wound was only a flesh wound, why-—i plastered it up, and joined my ship. trot. buckthorpe, forgive me. my dear joe (to ban-gles) you have made us all extremely happy ! bang. made you all extremely happy ! i’ve made myself confoundedly miserable. if i had been killed right ofl‘. buckthorpe might have been tried for murder, and i might have married edith and been happy for the rest of my life! (to bnckthoere) now, sir, if you will allow me, i shall have a melancholy pleasure in shaking your hand. [he does . enter sergeam‘ and cumming. sergeant. (to randall). beg pardon, sir! are you the gent. that wrote this note ? rand. eh—yes! serg. well, here we are, sir. what can we do for you. i suppose your information’s along of bill burke, alias the rum cglgtomer. we’ve got information that he’s somewhere here- a uts. buck. burke! that’s an alias of randall’s! sergeant, that’s your man! serg. eh? oh, i see! (removes ram)all’s wig and beard.) lor’l so it isl william burke, i arrest you on raivd ll.’s thumb. scant. five years! we hadn’t so much as a squabble for the first fifteen. trot. fifteen! i thought you had only been married three weeks! scant. three weeks? nonsense—away, deception! thirty- five years. mrs. scant. it has seemed like three weeks, hasn’t it seamle- bury ? scant. my own! mrs. scant. my love! both. ugh! miss s. (coming forward with parcel). bless ! how very odd! all. what’s the matter ? miss s. (reads from the newspaper cover) “on the th instant, at trinity church, paddington, by the reverend reginald reredos, theodore flamboys, esq., to augusta, only daughter of caleb walker, of jamaica, west indies.” trot. why, you young rascal, i thought you had been married five years. flamb. (very much confused). it has seemed like five years, hasn’t it, augusta ! mrs. scant. then george, and thomas, and william, and john? scant. and jane, and emma, and mary, and kate flamb. (to scantlesoay.) some day. buck. (seated with enitu on bench at back of stage.) . so friday's enemies at last are gone, and friday owes his life to robinson. in gratitude to robinson he’ll bend true, faithful, and submissive to the end. edith. will friday always, always be the same? buck. even when robinson has changed her name ; the only change that we shall undergo. edith. no, you must change your name. buck. indeed ! how so? edith. from that day forth—that happy, happy high day, you shall be robinson and i' be friday ! dramatis personze. the dunc on dundee, an octogenarian peer. sm cuthn ':r ' jameson, a middle-aged baronet. manonrs de bnirvllle. vrcomrn armand de biu'rv lln, his son. l\i. lachaud, at french arnocat. mn. dudley coxn-coxn, on his travels. mn. barker, the duke's courier. mr. taylor, the duke’s valet. m. paillard, a french money-lender‘. mn. macquarrie, purser of p, and . ss. “ africa.” pollard, a detective. cartain munro, of the steam yacht “flying eagle." mn. mcfie, the duchess of dundee’s secrctarr/. quartermaster, p. and . as. “ africa." servants. tun duchess or dummrc, nee euphemia s. van zyl, if chieuyo. the marquise de breville, armand’s mother. diana .zvnmcl, an australian heiress. mas. dudley coxn-coxn, on her trauels. miss ‘somertof, passenger, p. and . ss. “af-rlea." miss bailey, the duchee.s's maid. 'passen_qez's, sailors, lascars, ifs. 'act i. port said. quarter-deck of p. and . as. “afr-ica.” twelve months elapse between acts i. and ii. act ii. paris. (vlcomte zle bréville's residence in the champs t'l_'/sees). eight months elapse between act; ii. and i !- act iii. \ monte carlo. l'ibrar_ / in the duchesshs villa. n 're.—by the rd article of the code olvile a frenchman who is . under the age of twenty-five cannot legally contract marriage unless he has obtained the consent of his parents if they be living. if, dispensing with this consent, he should go through the form of marriage, that marriage may be attacked by his parents or by himself. ‘it is open to his parent to give a post-nuptial consent to such a marriage, but he is not bound by such consent, and is entitled nevertheless to apply to the courts for a decree of nullity on his own responsibility. ' the fortune-hunter. act i. woo'd. scene.-quarter-deck of p. and o. ship “africa” (starboard side), looking aft. deck cabins l. bulwarks r. saloon skylight up l. awning overhead. the ship is at anchor at port said. chairs ranged on deck. afternoon. mr. and mrs. dudley coxe-coxe, miss somerton and other passengers discovered grouped in a semi-circle round sir. cuthbert jameson and the wicomte de brév ille, who are entertaining the group with a fencing bout. after a few passes, sir cuthbert hits de brăville over the heart. applause from passengers. de b. good! again you have pinked me! and precisely on the same spot! once more. - [they resume. after a few passes, sir. cuthbert hits de brévil le as before. de b. five times in succession! i give in. it is impossible to stand up to you. it is absolutely incomprehensible to me. i am not unskilled in fence, yet every time you hit me on exactly the same spot! - sir c. it's very simple—a mere trick. see? [they cross foils again, and with the same result. applause from spectators. - de b. a trick? yes! but when you hold all the trumps, tricks are easy to make. - - sir c. let's try again. “spot barred,” if you like. de b. no, no! enough for the moment. we frenchmen rather pride ourselves on our skill with the foils, but i must take off my mask to you, my dear cuthbert, i must indeed. (to spectators.) ladies and gentlemen, you see a vanquished frenchman | - [they both remove their masks. de bréville han. his mask and foil to sir. cuthbert, takes off hi. " fencing jacket, and puts on his coat. the for t u ve—li un t er. sir . (taking the mask and foil). i learnt the trick of jules j avot, maitre d’armes to the th cuirassiers, thirty years ago. poor fellow, he was knocked over in one of the battles round metz and his skull cracked with a drum-major’s staff. no one is skilled with all weapons. de b. ah! i was sure france had something to do with it. '( to spectators.) ladies and gentlemen, when you think lightly of the vicomte de bréville, remember drum-major jules javot. but, cuthbert, you must teach me the trick, some day. eh? will you not? sir c'. with pleasure, when we meet in england. the trick’s easy enough when you’ve got the hang of it. (bell.) ah! the dressing bell. you leave us to-night, but i shall see you before you go. ‘ [emit down companion, followed by all the passengers emcept mn. and mas. dudley coxls-coxe and miss somnrvrou. miss sam. never mind, m. de bréville. if sir cuthbert has the best of you with the foils, you beat him out and out with the rif"e. de b. yes, i believe i. have a little the best of hii with the rifle. . mrs. coace. is it true that you once saved his life when he was tiger shooting in india? de b. ah! pardon. it was the other way—he saved mine. a magnificent tiger held me under his claws when sir cuthbert dropped a bullet into his ear just as he was about to begin on my right arm. it was mv very narrowest escape! mrs. cooce. you must be a very brave man, m. de bréville, to care so little for tigers. de b. ah, but you mistake, mrs. coxe-coxe. i care a great deal for tigers! do you think that when i am face to face with a man-eater i am not frightened? my dear lady, i have killed twenty-three tigers, and each tiger has terrified me beyond expression. _ _ miss sam. but when one is terrified one runs away. de b. not from a tiger, for to run away from a tiger is death. frankly, i have not the courage to run away from a tiger. i prefer to stay and put a ball into him—not because i am brave, but because i a afraid to run away. mr. come. how did you come to take to tiger-shooting ? it's not the sort of fun that most frenchmen care about. de b. most frenchmen? no—nor most englishmen, my good mr. uoxe-coxe. it is an acquired taste, and one must have the chance to acquire it. but, given that chance, in the the for tune-hun' 'l'.' i’. desire not to be killed, your frenchman and your englishman are of one mind. so your frenchman and your englishman are equally disinclined to run away, when running away means certain death. by the way, have the duke and duchess of dundee come on board yet? mrs. come. n , but their luggage has. they are coming off in the harbour-master's launch. did you happen to meet the duchess when you were in the states? they say that she rose from nothing at all. de b. yes—when i was attaché at washington, i had the honour of meeting her grace many times. but she was not her grace then—she was miss euphemia s. van zyl, the charming millionaire orphan of absolutely self-made parents. her father, who was an aristocrat in pork, died, having made a vast fortune, every penny of which—ten millions of dollars—he bequeathed to her. little girl. ten millions of dollarsl if i had ten millions of dollars, i wonder what i would buy with it? de b. my dear child, if you werea grown-up young american lady, you would buy with it exactly what miss van zyl bought with it—you would buy an old, old english duke. little girl (puzzled). a doll-duke? de b. well, yes—a doll-duke. and you would nurse your poor old doll-duke as she nurses him—you would be kind to him, and you would be very careful not to break him—ancl when your poor old doll-duke fell to pieces you would renounce dolls for ever, for by that time you would be a very great lady, and very great ladies do not nurse dolls if they can help it. miss sam. and you are really leaving us to-day? de b. yes, alas! my luggage is already on board the “ cleo- patra,” and i sail for athens in an hour! jllrs. (lame. we shall miss you terribly, m. de bréville! de b. ah, mrs. coxe-coxe, you are so good! to me it will be like going from one planet to another, and this has been such a delightful planet. after you, miss somerton. [miss som:stou and dr: bnfivrlle go down companion. mn. and mns.!duolr:y coxa-coxs remain on deck.] mr. come. do you know, godiva, i’m quite glad that we are going to travel with a live duke and duchess. mz's. come. my dear dudley, what an extraordinary speech! what in the world are the duke and duchess to us? mr. come. absolutely nothing—except for the amusement they will indirectly aflord us. ,mrs. come. oh, from that point of view i admit they have their value. the for tune-hunter. pur. are you? well, you won’t have one this voyage-—- we’re full up. when do the duke and duchess come on board ? we get under weigh in half an hour. ‘ . bar. the launch is going back for them. i suppose you’ll be here to receive them ? pur. n —i don’t think that will be necessary. if the duke wants me he can send for me. i shall be in my ofifice. [e:z:it. bar. cool hands these merchant fellows, upon my honour! start in half an hour, do they? not before we come on board, i fancy. (arranging chairs.) whose chair’s this? (reads) mr. dudley coxe-coxe. now, who the deuce is mr. dudley coxe-coxe ? [coxe has strolled down. mr. come (with great deference). i beg your pardon—— bar. eh ? mr. come. you were good enough to mention my name, i think ? bar. oh, you’re mr. coxe. yes. i read it off your chair. you’ll be rather in our way here, i fancy. would it be troubling you too much to-- —- mr. come. oh, remove it at once-—pray permit me——quarter- master placed it there. (removing it.) charming weather. [barker throws away cigarette end. coxe picks it up, while barker is arranging rugs on chair, and puts it in his own oase.] bar. yes—smart breeze outside though. jllr. game. is there ? you yacht a good deal, i believe ? bar. yes—we usually winter in the mediterranean ; but this year we went up the nile to wady halfa. mr. coxe. indeed! how awfully good of you—i mean that must have been very pleasant. by the way, i trust my cigarette is not disagreeable to you ? if so, l’ll-—-— 'bar. not a bit. ’ll join you. may i ask you for one? i’ve mislaid my case. mr. gere (efusivelg). with the very greatest pleasure. pray permit me. [coxe ofers cigarette case. barker picks out cigarette end. bar. hallo! ]why, ijust threw this away! mr. coaee (confused). oh, i beg your pardon. i’m— ’m collecting cigarette ends ! bar. curious hobby ! come from far ? _ ]l'ir. come. calcutta. by the way, we travelled across india wizh the viceroy. bar. oh, elliston ? the foxzuvz- m vra‘ e. mr. come. yes, elliston. you know him, of course ? bar. know him? rather ! travelled all over europe with him a couple of years ago. quaint old fellow. ' mr. come. most quaint—most charming—most delightful. so frank and open-handed. bar. (doubtfully). humph! close-fisted old chap, i should say. mr. come. curiously close-fisted. never knew a more close- fisted man. he was travelling with the marquis of samborough. bar. ah ! good fellow, samborough. pretty daughters, to —espeoially lady arabella. sad business her marriage. mr. coxe. awful—frightful—deplorable. bar. turned out well, though, eventually. mr. come. turned out splendidl y—magnificentl y—eventuall y. you—you are bound for brindisi, i understand ? bar. yes—en route for monte carlo, where we spend a fort- night at our villa. wish we could make it longer, for i always pull off a pot of money at the tables. mr. ceace. really ! it’s all luck, i suppose ? bar. not altogether. if the tables are properly worked,luok simply influences the sum of the gains. mr. come. properly worked ? bar. yes—i mean worked on a scientific _system. mr. come. never found a system that was worth a da— (correcting himself) cent. bar. i’ve been more fortunate. i have a system that never failed me yet—but it wants a moderate hank. you can’t lose, and with average luck you double your capital every three- quarters of an hour. it may be two hours, but it averages about three-quarters. - mr. come. that sounds tremendous! (much interested.) bar. you see, zero’s the death of most systems, but in this case zero is all in your favour. the bank are mad about it— and it’s really hardly fair on them, for it’s playing on a certainty. . jllr. come. i can’t quite see that. 'l‘hey’d have no hesitation in rooking you on a certainty. bar. true-—true. mr. come. they’d have no qualms about it—s why should you? is it fair to ask—- bar. perfectly fair—but i’m sorry to say i mustn't reveal it. the fact is, it was confided to me by no less a swell than the apostate archimandritc poulos, on his deathbed in the carpathians, under a solemn promise never to reveal it. mr. come. i see. of course—a deathbed confidence . the f ‘ tune-hu./v e . bar. in the carpathians— — _ ’ mr. come. is sacred. i quite see that. . bar. as a man of honour my tongue is tied. i, now and then, play for a friend—but i never reveal the theory. mr. come. does it require a large capital? _ bar. you must be prepared to lose £ "at the outset. i don’t say you will lose it, but you must be prepared to do so. a couple of hundred is still better. ‘ . mr. gore. oh, that’s nothing! bar. nothing at all. mr. gome. now, i wonder whether—but, no-—hi.t’s asking too much—— ' ' - liar. .ah, i know what you were going to say. will i play with a couple of hundred on your behalf ? wasn’t that it ?_ hallie! ._ ' " ' mr. gere. well, really, that’s very remarkable. tliey are the very words i had on the tip of my tongue. can't imagine how you came to guess it. _ bar. my dear fellow, it’s quite simple. everybody i meet asks me the same question. yes, if you like to trust it to me: i’ve no objection. _ m'r. come. i can’t express my gratitude. if you'll allow me, i'll go to my state room and fetch the notes. bar. oh, any time will do. _ . . mr. come. well, we shall be under weigh in an hour, and when we’re under weigh my wife and i are under hatches, we’re such awfully bad sailors. so, as you leave the ship in three days, i’d better get the money now._ bar. as you please. by the way, where’s the bar? mr. come. forward of the saloon. bar. then let’s split a whisky-and-soda. come along-—after ou. . y mr. c' xe. i couldn’t think of it. really, it would be im- possible—quite out of the question. . " iar. as you please. . [emit barker down companion. mb. coxa-coxe about to follow him when de britiville, who has over- heard the latter part of the conversation from up stage, comes down. ' ' ‘ ‘. de b. ah, mr. coxe—one moment.’ ‘ . . - . mr. comc. can’t stop. ’m going to split a whisky-and: soda with the duke. ' ' "' . de b. the duke ? mr. come. yes, the duke of dundee. ' _ de b. ah, that was the duke you were speakingto ? the fortune-hunter. your nose is not long, and you can see no further than the tip of it. go—you are a good fellow, and i am a good fellow, and there are many on my side of the channel that are as good as you, and better—far better-—than i; but you do not per- ceive them because your nose is not long. sir c. well, i suppose it’s all confounded prejudice, but as a rule i certainly don't get on with frenchmen. but it’s different with you. you were brought up in england—went to eton and cambridge. you have all the good solid qualities of an englishman—you ride straight across leicestershire, you are conscientious with women, and there‘s no better hand at big game living. de b. ah, i kill things, and so you love me, big, bloodthirsty john bull that you are! well, i will go on killing, and you will love me more and more. tigers ? bah! tigers are nothing. when i come to england i will hire a slaughter-house, and poleaxe oxen until you are not able to contain yourself with joy! and then you will be merciful to my countrymen who shoot blackbirds, for the sake of your beloved armand, ' who swims in the blood of cattle ! sir . (laughing). my dear fellow, one such frenchman as you are redeems a whole department. i wish you’d complete the illusion by marrying an englishwoman. de b. (seriously). well, it may happen—who knows ? englishwomen make admirable wives. shall i confess ? it is the dream of my life to marry an englishwoman. sir . my dear fellow, i’m rejoiced to hear you say so. but a dream! why a dream? why not make it a matter of fact? to a man with your qualities there should be no difficulty in doing that. de b. ah, but i am not rich ; and although there are plenty of rich englishgirls, i am no fortune-hunter. i must first love—and if ichance to love a rich girl and to be beloved in return, it is well, and i shall marry her; but if she happened to be poor—well, i could not forego her on account of her poverty, nor could i marry her on account of mine. shall i tell you a secret which has been on the tip of my tongue for six weeks past? i once proposed to an enormously rich woman, and i confess that it was her wealth that fascinated me. it was the first time, and it shall be the last. sir c. an english girl ? . de b. not english, and no girl. an american, ten years older than i, but still sulficiently young. she accepted me—at least so it was understood. but it’s an old story. a better suitor presented himself, and i received my conga’, and it served the f ly lucky—lucky in being able to make up your mind to quit so charming a lady, and lucky to have. so charming a lady to return to when your holiday is at an end. frankly, if i were in your case, even the duchess of du.ndee—- (“ hush! ”from de barivnmn)-—would not lure me from her side. with me, the end of my holiday would be its beginning. de b. my good lachaud, it is easy to theorize about the married felicity of one’s friends. but theories have this failing —that they are apt to be fallacies. h ].a.ch. what do you mean? in madame de bréville you ave de b. in madame de bréville i have a beautiful and blame- less wife, of whom everyone would approve except the only people whose approval is important to us—my parents. l¢wh' is it possible that your parents have any fault to find . the fortowe'hulvter' with her? to know madame de bréville is to accept her as a miraculous incarnation of an impossible abstraction! de b. perhaps; but my parents do not know madame de bréville. more than that, they never will know her. lach. you astound me! but you were of age when you married. twenty-nine, were you not ? de b. no, twenty-four. lach. but, my dear friend, what you have just told me is very serious. you are, of course, aware that by our civil code before a man who is under twenty-five may marry he must obtain the consent of his father and mother, or his marriage is voidable at their pleasure. de b. or at his own. lash. or at his own. de b. my dear lachaud, i know it but too well. my parents, as you are aware, are aristocrats of the purest blood. they are poor, but their pride of lineage is superlative, and they would rather have seen their son lying dead before them than that he should marry a girl, english or french, whose people belonged to the merchant class. my only hope was to marry her and rely upon their accepting her as a daughter- in-law rather than place her in the position of a nullified wife. lach. but your father and mother will justify your con- fidence in them? they will not condemn this innocent lady to a life of unmerited ignominy ? de b. alas! my friend, in crediting them with such bour- geois emotions you do injustice their pride of birth. lach. but m. le marquis is the soul of honour. de b. he is, but his honour is not so much heroic as heraldic. the de brissacs, the de vincennes, the de gallifets, and the de contades have contributed his ingredients, and my mother is descended in a direct line from the bretignys of poitou. from the tone of my father’s reply to the letter in which announced my marriage to him i am convinced (though i have not yet broken it to my wife) that he intends to apply at once to the civil tribunal for a declaration of nullity. lach. surely—surely you misjudge him ! de b. ah, i know him well! and now, my dear lachaud. i am in this difficulty: i love my wife dearly—i love my parents dearly. in marrying her i deceived them, and in taking the steps which i feel sure they intend to take they are well within their rights. this question, then, naturally arises: am i, who wilfully deceived them, justified in allowing the odium of these proceedings to rest upon their aged shoulders? in the for]'u ve'huzvter¢ other words, if these proceedings must be taken, is it not rather my duty to initiate them myself? . [carefully watching the efect of his words on lachaud. lach. to initiate them yourself? (de bs.r’:vrlls nods.) to apply in your own name for a decree of nullity ? . de b. rather than impose that terrible necessity.upon the shoulders of my father. lach. but you are jesting! you are incapable of such an act of infamy towards the woman you have sworn to cherish for life! if i am deceived in this— - de b. lachaud, i have too much respect for the sentiment that inspires a burst of honest indignation to criticize too.closely the shape in which it presents itself. you have described my proposal as an act of infamy. it is a strong expression, but let it remain until i have convinced you that it is an act of justice. enter diana. di'. i beg your pardon, armand—l thought you _were alone. de b. this gentleman, whom you will permit me to present to you, is m. lachaud, who is to be my travelling companion. (aside to lachann.) not a word about the duchess! (aloud.) m. lachaud—the vicomtesse de bréville. lach. madame la vicomtesse, i am overjoyed at the honour that is conferred upon me. (aside) poor lady i poor lady ! dia. (with assumed gaiety). you have come to rob me of my husband, m. lachaud. this is not kind, for he has only been home a week. will you. not relent, and spare him to me a little longer ? . lacli. madame, it distresses me beyond measure that my presentation to you should be associated in your mindwith so deplorable a circumstance as m. de bréville’s departure. but pardon me, madame—i do not take him from you. did. true-—he goes willingly! lach. m. de bréville has, no doubt, some adieux to make which it would ill become me to interrupt. if madame will permit me to retire dia. it is unnecessary. m. de bréville is so well accustomed to take leave of me that our farewells are of a very business—like description. and we pait for so short a time—three months—- perhaps only two! de b. pardon me, my child, but if lachaud will permit me, i would gladly be alone with you for a few minutes. [lachaud bows, and dia. (surprised). armand! what can you have to say to me that m. lachaud should not hear ? . l . the fozervwe-h / v:'ask. de b. (with some emotion). i have only to say farewell, diana. it is a little word, but—sometimes it means much. only farewell! dia. why—armandl (looking into his eyes.) one—one would think you were sorry to go! - de b. i am. deeply sorry, diana. dia. (surprised at his emotion). are you—are you in earnest, armand ? de b. (sighing). yes, diana-—i anrin earnest! dia. (looking earnesliy at him). armand! why, this is music from heaven! months have passed since you spoke to me in this way! what can it mean ? de b. you know that i have a foolish unreasoning faith in presentiment. well, i have a foreboding that a calamity is in store for you—that grave sorrow may come upon you before long. you are in the habit of laughing at my forebodings, but they impress me, and i cannot shake them off. and so, diana, i am very sad at leaving you. dia. a calamity! (b'u,ddenly.) you have no quarrel on hand ? you are not in any danger ? de b. no-—i know of none. (diana relieved.) yet if a heavy blow should fall on you during my absence——- dia. do you mean if you should die? de !. put it in that way, if you will. if my foreboding should come true—if it should come to pass that" you find yourself husbandless—hardee your heart towards me, my child, and remember that i am one who is not worth weeping for- that i am a cold, cruel, self-seeking man, who has so poor an appreciation of wifely love that he has dared to repay your priceless devotion with coldness, indiflerence, and neglect. bah! such a man is not worth a tear. dia. armand, it is cruel—it is foolish to say these things to m_e! there is a quiver in your voice which gives them the lie. oh, forget my reproaches! when you hold me to you as you hold me now, i know that i have misjudged you, and my heart harks back to the days when your love was as the torrid sun, and i live once more the supreme life that i lived then. it is not that you have not loved me enough, but that i have loved you too well. oh, my god, can it be that the love i had i have again? it will abide with you, armand, while you are away—and it will come back with.you—it wil come back with you? [kneels, sobbing at his feet. de b. yes, yes. diana—surely»—surely! there, there-—be brave and strong! i am not worth such love. diana— et me go, or i shall break down! the fortu ve—hu./vter. dia. n o—stop there-—stop there—give me time to stamp this moment on my memory! there—i have it—go—i can bear it now! . de b. farewell, diana! there-—think of me at my worst, and waste no time on me! adieu! [emit de bruévrrmn hastily. dia. (staggers to a table, on which she rests). he is gone! this parting, that has brooded over me like a bird of evil omen during the past week, it is over, and—god help me !—it has left me happier than i have been for ‘months past! what in heaven’s name is the cause of this strange sense of calm relief, as if some wringing pain had been suddenly assuaged ? (sud— denly, as if a light had broken on her.) the man loves me! loves me! ah, god, it is that! it has all come back to me again! there has been a dark and sombre interval-—an interval of gloom and deadness—but the cloud has passed, and the glorious sun beams full upon me in all its torrid fervour—as of old—as of old! [enter servant, with card. serv. a gentleman desires to see madame la vicomtesse. dia. to see me! (takes card.) sir cuthbert jameson l show this gentleman in, at once! (erit servant.) sir cuthbert jameson, of all men! it is well that he comes at this moment ; it is well that he comes when i can tell him, frankly and truth- fully, that i am as happy as he could desire me to be! (enter servant, showing in sir cuthbert.) ah, sir cuthbert, this is indeed a most welcome and most delightful surprise! i cannot tell you how overjoyed i am to see you, my dear, dear old friend! sir c. thank you heartily for your kind reception. i should have given you notice of my intention to call upon you, but i started for paris at an hour’s notice, and i arrived only an hour . ago, and—well, lcouldn’t wait! and how is armand, and where is he? _ dia. how unfortunate! he has just left for monte carlo on his way to naples. . he will be very sorry when he learns that he has missed you. ten minutes sooner and you would have seen him. str c. that’s unlucky indeed, for i have a proposal to make to which his consent is indispensable. dia. a proposal? sir . yes. i don’t, as a rule, interfere in other people’s affairs, but i confess i am not quite happy about this marriage of yours—without the consent and approval of his parents. dim. but you know how we were situated. i wrote and told you all. the fortune-hunter. sir c. yes, yes! well, ‘we won’t discuss that. you know my views on the subject of concealment in such matters, and there’s no necessity to repeat them. the mischief’s done, and now the only question is—what is the best thing to do, and can i be of any service in helping you to do it? dia. you are very, very kind. sir c. not a bit. i’m a fidgety old fellow, whose mind is not at rest upon this matter, and in my own interests i want to quiet it—that’s all. now, in the first place, have your husband’s parents been informed of his marriage? dia. yes. armand wrote to them (they are at tours—his father is the general commanding the district), telling them everything. sir . come, that’s well. and they ? dia. they contented themselves with a cold acknowledgment of the receipt of his letter. sir c. that is all ? dia. that is all. _ sir . then, surely, if there ever was a case for an inter- mediary this is one. i will wire to de bréville for his sanction, and as soon as i get it i will start for tours, and the deuce is in it if [don’t bring them round. i can start to-morrow and be back again in a couple of days, and perhaps bring them with me. n w—what do you say ? dia. i say that you are a good, true, and tried friend, and that whatever you think it right to do will be the best thing that could be done. sir c. then i take that as consent. now, tell me about yourself. you are well and thoroughly happy? dia. quite well, and, but for the difficulty you have referred to, as happy as ever i was in my life. sir g. come, that’s good news indeed. and you don’t find it irksome to be chained down to one spot? dia. i must make the best of a necessity which, after all, is not so very terrible. of course, this is very unlike the life i intended to lead, but since the failure of the brisbane bank our resources have been much straitened, and when armand has to go abroad he cannot afford to take me with him. but you must not suppose that i am complaining. sir c. you are a brave lady, indeed. and so armand is on his way to monte carlo ? di‘. for a few days only—on his way to naples. sir ( . he will find an old friend at monte carlo or at naples —her grace of dundee. dia. (surprised). the duchess of dundee ? v. e f lz’ _'u ve—f](/nter. . sir c. yes—didn’t you know she was .there? dia. (agitated). no. no, i did not know it. sir c. oh, yes. the jolly widow is (in her expressive vernacular) simply making the place hum. she has bought a lovely chéteau—the villa bonaventura. she gives magnificent fr?tes——plays heavily—d esn’t care what. she loses—and alto- gether, as she says, does her best to make up the lee-way that she lost when tommy was more or less alive. she spends her time between monte carlo and naples, running backwards and forwards in her fifteen hundred ton steam yacht, the flying eagle. altogether, she’s the presiding genius of the place. dia. (aside). he did not tell me that that woman was there. he must have known it--—why did he keep it from me? he_ knows that i hate her-—hate her! ‘ ‘ sir c. (noticing her agitation). my dear lady, what in the world is the matter ‘. dia. n othing-—nothing— (after a pause, throws her.-gel/" sobbing on the s fa)—oh, i see it all now! oh, my god, i see it all—— i see it all ! . ' _ . sir o. come, come—-this won’t do !" surely there is nothing to distress you in the fact that the duchess happens to be at monte carlo ? . _ _ ' ' dia. sir cuthbert, i told you justnow thatl was as happy as i have ever been. when i spoke it was true, for my husband —cold, polite, insensible a_s_a rule-'-had displayed an emotion at leaving me which filled me _with a' joy to which i have been for months a stranger. but i have good reason to believe that this woman attracts him-—he concealed from me the fact that she is lthere—and he has gone to her. that’s all—he has gone to her sir c. my dearvicomtesse, you are surely torturing yourself with groundless suspicions. the duchess is . dia. the duchess is an old flame of his—he was onceengaged to marry her. when he went to london he stopped at her house in park lane. his letters to me were dated_ from the embassy, and only learnt the truth through the gossip of a society paper. now, although we are desperately pressed for money, he takes monte carlo on his road to naples—whither she is in the habit of going—in her steam yacht—_in her steam yacht sir . but all this is open to very obvious explanations dia. it is open to an explanation that might, perhaps, satisfy anybody but arjealous woman. but lam a jealous woman, and i am not prepared to accept miraculous coincidences. it is well that you should know the truth. when i was rich, he loved me after the manner of his kin(l—when i lost all, his affection, . ' the for tune-hua/‘tea’. may appear to be illibcral and narrow-minded. still it exists, and must therefore be reckoned with. sir c. well, sir, now that i know your views upon this point, i must admit that in keeping his intended marriage secret from you, your son was not as blameworthy as i supposed him to be. - marquis. and you will pardon me, sir cuthbert jameson, if i remind you that he is always blameworthy who defies the laws of his country. sir . how do you mean ? what law has he defied ? . marquis. he has broken the rd article of the civil code, which declares that before a‘ man who is under the_ age of twenty-f-ve may marry he must obtain the consent of his father and mother—or whichever of them may be living.‘ sir c. but how does this apply? your son is eight or nine and twenty. _ _ marquise. forgive me, sir—six months since, when he married, our son wanled four months of twenty-five. ' sir c. you amaze me beyond measure !' marquise. you will not tell me, sir, that our son has deceived you upon this point? ‘ ' sir c. i certainly cannot, at this moment, charge my memory with any direct statement of his to that effect, but the impression on my mind? marquis. still, sir, it is beyond all question that he was under legal age when he went through the form of marriage with this lady—consequently his act in marrying her without our consent is not only unpardonable—il: is illegal. forgive me, sir, if we appear to you to be unreasonable, but you are an englishman, and you do not understand these things. we have the honour to wish you ood-day. they are about to leave the room. enter diana, deadly pale and tremblring with agitation. she holds an open letter in her hand. dia. stay—do not go yet. something has happened, and you must hear it. i have just received a lctter—froin your son. it was written-—before he left-—and has been brought to me—by a commissionaire from the railway station. sir cuthbert—read it to them—i can’t—i can’t ! (sm c-uthbert takes the letter and reads.) sir . (reads). “ it pains me deeply to have to reveal to you, by means of a letter, a terrible catastrophe which, i frankly admit, i had not the courage to break to you, face to face. when we were married i was, unfortunately, still under legal age. this ‘the for ' ‘u/ve-h un ‘er. stateroom no. , next to c . and mrs. pogson e. bewilder. her grace wrote to him on her arrival, two days ago, to tell him she intended to take him back with her in her yacht, and he wires from ventimiglia to say he’ll be here this afternoon. capt. well, that’s prompt. young gentleman, i believe, this time ? mcfic. young? just a rideeculously raw boy! sax-aud- twenty, sir! sax-and-twenty ! capt. well, that's only fair—eighty-four and twenty-six-— average that, and it pans out fifty-five. business man ? mcfie. well, not exactly, but i should say he's gifted with a varra remarkable business instinct. he’s as poor as a rat, and he’s secured a duchess with £ , ) a year. capt. well, it does him credit. good clay, mr. mcfie. you can tell her grace that the yacht will be ready to weigh any time after ten on thursday morning. mcfie. l’ll mention it. good day, captain munro. (emit carvrain.) ah, it’s a peety—a verra great peety! amagni- ficent wumman—in the prime ’ life—not a day over forty- with her intellect matured, and all her physical faculties in the highest state of development, just squandering hersel’ on an incomplete frenchman of sax-and-twenty! why, the man won’t be finished for a quarter of a century yet! but a wumman’s just anither name for a fule !—take ’em when ye “gill and where ye will and how ye will, that’s a’ ye can make ’em. enter duoeess. duch. mr. mofie, when mr. de bréville arrives put him in the pink room, please. ’tain’t over big, but it’s only for two days, and it’s the only spare room left. jl/[cfie. certainly, your grace. duch. now about these two swinrlliug pcople—the dudley coxes. is the detective here? mclrlie. yes, your grace. he’s sent wurrd to say that he’s just arrived from london with a warrant for their arrest on a charge of endeavouring to obtain a sum of £ from his late grace’s estate on a false pretence. the detective will be here, i expect, in about ten minutes. duch. very well. when he comes show him into the ante- room and let me know. when is mr. dudley coxe to call? mcfie. well, he’s due now. duch. have you got his letters ? mcfie. here are two which he wrote to his grace asking him what had become of the £ which he entrusted to his grace . ' he f t u./v z‘-h un er. mr. code. well, really it was such an insignificant matter that—well, it was partly this :-—as you no doubt know, the poor duke had an infallible system at roulette-—givcn him by some archimandrite or other on his death-bed. duch. the duke’s death-bed ? mr. come. no-—the archimandrite’s; and when we met at port said i left a trifle with him?- duch. with the archimandrite ? mr. gare. no, with the duke—to be staked on my behalf, and my letters were merely to-ask if anything had been done with it—that’s all. duch. and you received no reply ? mr. come. well, no— ddly enough. duch. as an old friend that must have surprised you. mr. come. well, it did, because we were always on such very good terms-—and i can’t tell you how delighted i was to hear that his grace was dead, because that explained his silence so satisfactorily. . jlfrs. c' a;e (aside). dudley's tact is wonderful! duch. he gave you some acknowledgment, i guess ? mr. come. oh, no-—no—we—we never took receipts from each other! duch. just like poor tommy! but we must be more business-like. now it’s quite clear that this sum—whatever it was mr. come. what was it, godiva? mrs. c‘re. two hundred pounds, dear, you said. duch. must be due to you now, because the duke was con- fined to his room with gout during the whole time of his stay here, and certainly never showec his nose inside the casino anyhow. ‘ . ' mr. gore. indeed? then, ha! ha! if we are to take a strictly prosaic view of the situation, as your grace insists, it does look as though i had some sort of claim on his grace’s estate, though, to be perfectly frank with you, it never occurred to me to look at it in that light until you mentioned it. ' duch. some sort of claim! why, my dear mr. coxe (coxe . murmurs “ooxe-coxe”), by your own showing it’s a distinct _ debt, and i may as well write you a cheque at once ! [w"rites. .mrs. come (aside). dudley, you’re a genius! mr. come (aside). told you i'd manage it! . duc/r. there you are. i’ll take a receipt, please, because i shall have to claim againstthe executors. mr. come. most certainly. _ _ [writes. mrs. oome. ‘it’s really most kind of your grace. you can the _ for tune -if u vtls'l<‘. : for your arrest, duly backed by a bow street magistrate. (put- ting hamicufls on them.) and it’s my duty to caution you that any statement you may make will be used in evidence against you. ‘ mr. coate. but—— . mrs. come. oh, dudley, dudley, say something, unless you wish to see your wife a galley slave! mr. coxe. this-—this is most unwarrantab e—most disgrace- ful. (to docnsss.) you shall pay for this, m’am. this is not the united states—this is a free country—at least england is—and you commit this outrage at your peril. [during this mns. coxe-coxe, who is sobbing, has been unsuccessfully endeavouring to get her handkerchief out of her handbag, but is prevented by handcufs. mrs. coxe. dudley—(sm'fl)-—my_ handkerchief-—(sn ifl°). ]l[r. come. certainly, my love (takes it out of her hand-bag ‘and dubs her eyes and nose with it). . enter barker. ll bar. your grace wished to speak to me? mr. coxe (astonished). why, there is the very man ilent the money to ! . mrs. coxe. oh, sir, you will endorse my husband’s statement —the £ that be entrusted to you at port said. 'l‘hey’ve put these dreadful things. upon us because he claimed the money. _ bar. i don’t know what the lady means. duch. this person is my courier—mr. john barker. mr. come. courier! y on a confounded courier ? why, this low-bred scoundrel allowed me to believe that he was—a—- a . duch. your old and intimate friend ? ‘ mr. come. a—yes-—and took the £ . a courier, godiva, a damned courier ! bar. i don’t know what you mean, sir. i have never repre- sented that i am the duke of dundee, and i never saw you in my life before. enter de ba §v lle, as from a journey. de b. that statement is not true, mr. barker. duch. armand l _ _ . de b. you certainly entered into conversation with mr. coxe at port said, and i happen to know that he was under the impression that he was speaking to the duke of dundee. ;; ma for rum-zzawrasr. bar. it’s not my fault if mr. coxe mistook me for his grace. the money was employed as mr. coxe directed. i lost it in fair play. _ duch. very good—y u can go, and don’t come back. take you your books to mr. mefie—he will settle with you; be off ! [emit barker. mr. come. mr. de bréville, we are deeply indebted to you for your timely interposition. (both shaking hands with him.) excuse me-—it’s difficult in these things: i’m not used to them. de b. no apologies, mr. coxe, i beg. (to pollard.) you may remove these things. (pollard takes of handcufs from both.) duchess, these are merely two of nature’s noblepeople who have got themselves into difiiculties through an amiable desire to associate with their superiors in mere social rank. do not let us press hardly on them. after all, it was a tribute to _ the charm of his grace’s society. mr. cooce. let me tell you, sir—— de b. it is an excusable ambition, mr. coxe, which you share with many of your amiable countrymen and women. but, my good coxe (coxe shouts “coxe-coxe, sir! ”), permit me to give you a hint. if you are an amateur of blaoking, lick the boots of as many noblemen as will permit you to do so— ah, there areplenty !—but before you begin, make quite sure that the blacking has the proper aristocratic bouquet. the blacking of a courier is not nice. mr. covce. why, you infernal frenehman— . [going_ up t/rreatem'nygiy .to dr. bmtvirmn, who turns suddenly on him). de b. well, sir ? . mrs. couce. oh, do come away, dudley! he's not a gentle- man—he’ll call you out! _ mr. come. you’re right. he’s beneath my notice! and as for you, ma’am (to ducrmss), take your cheque, ma’am; (handing it to her.) mz‘s. come. oh, dudley! . . mr. come. take your cheque! i’ve not the advantage of knowing what the code of etiquette may be in chicago pork circles, but it may interest you to learn that in a civilized country no one has a right to hold his head higher than an english gentleman ! ‘ mrs. come. oh, dudley, don’t be too hard upon her! you are so trenchant! . afr. come. trenchant! she’s brought it on herself, and it serves her right! come away, godiva. the for tune-hunter. [de beiivrlle opens window for mr. coxs. coxr: goes up to him. mr. g_re. you—you’d feel uncommonly small if you knew the profound contempt i have for you-—you mrs. come. oh, do come away, dudley ! (drags him of back- wards). [pollarn erits into ante-room. ducmcss looks after them for a moment, and then sits down to write. de b. duchess, have you no welcome for me? duch. welcome? why, i’m just bubblin’ over with it- only let me get these people off my mind first and you’ll see, my dear! de b. what people? duch. these poor dudley coxes. de b. ah, never concern yourself about those snobs ! duch. well, coxe is a snob-there’s no two ways out of that. but, lord bless you, so am i! i’ve worked a bit harder and paid a bit dearer than he has to get into good society—and, after all, he was only claiming what he believed to be his own. (rings.) so there’s his cheque—and much good may it do him. (enter servant.) take that note to the hotel de paris —there’s no answer. (emit seltvai\"r.) and now, armand-— now for the welcome l it’s real smart of you to turn up just in time. the yacht’s laying off nice, and we up-anchor on friday. in a- fortnight we ought to rise sandy hook, and in a week or so after that you’ll—well, you’ll be about the richest frenchman ’tween this and dunkirk. why, gracious, de bréville, what’s wrong? you look as down on your luck as a damp eagle on the moultl de. b. duchess, there is much that is wrong, and i must tell you at once that i am the wrong-doer. duch. why, what on airth are you steering at ? ])e b. i have been guilty of a mean and miserable injustice, and i have come here to ask you, as the good and great-hearted woman i know you to be, to encourage me to repair it. duch. w.hy, yes—if dollars will do it it’s as good as done. but whom, in pity's name, have you been injusring? not a woman, de bréville-—don’t say it’s a woman ! de b. alas, it is a woman! duch. not a young one, de bréville—don’t say it’s a young one ! de b. a young, beautiful, and blameless woman. duch. (aside). oh, what’s coming—wbat’s coming! (aloud.) who—who is she? de b. she is, at present, my wife. lv, f . the for tune-hunter. duch. your what! !! do you mean to tell‘me that when you came messing around me in park lane you were a married man! ' de b. before i became of age i went through the form of marriave with a lady. i need not tell you how good and how beautifiil a lady, for you knew her on board the africa as diana caverel. " duch. (moaning). oh, i might have guessed it—i might have guessed it"! de ob. as i had designedly omitted to obtain my parents’ consent, that marriage is voidable, and, as matters stand, will be annulled in a f rtni< ht’s time. ' duch. and do youamean to tell me that you—great, big brawny tiger-shooter as you are—:leserted that unhappyyoung critter because your poppa and your mumma refused their con- sent' ‘ de b. i had not even that poor excuse, for my parents, in gheir riglhteous indighgtilon at ta/lie outragel had committed, took er to t eir hearts an isown me. dach. bully for them, anyhow! well, i ’spose i’ve deserved this, but it comes hard and heavy for all that—vurry hard and vurry heavy ! but there‘-—i’!l take it that i treated you real mean two (years since, and you’re payin’ me back in my own coin. tain’t han seine de bréville but anyhow i’m not the sort of woman to nail a bad dollar to, the counter, so go you right away afore i break up, please. i’m a stupid, middle-aged woman with a thumping big_ british title, and a niagara of dollars pouring, dayhafter day, mto her bankmg accgunt, ang ylioou reba frenchman wit nary cent to your name an more e ts t an you could reckon up ’tw'ixt this and ’f ’risco, and for all that, at present speaking, i don’t rightly know how i’m going to fix myself up wrtliout you. well, some good ll come of it anyhow, for, by- well, by the president of the united states, to put zt no higher -—i’ll get such a sickener of frenchmen out of this as’ll set my l;er'cept ons right end up for the rest of my natural life, thanks e. de now, duchess, bring your kind and generous heart into this conference, and let it decide the point at issue. it is m my mind to atone for my misdoing, as far as atonement is : ? "ffg‘-“%‘"° z"‘°i‘i*"’; a i in er e again. now, duchess, i iinililore you to help nie to do this. “i know _your generous nature ;‘ i know it so well that i count implicitly on your readily settmg aside the injury i have worked upon you that i may be at liberty to repair the incalculably '. fortune-hun’ z:‘ i’. enter lionwni lach. (coldly). i received your message, and i am here. what do you want with me ? ' de b. i want to tell you that which will, i hope, re-establish me in your goodwill. . lach. de bréville, i am bound to presume that you are acting in accordance with what you believe to be your duty. i do not share your views, but as they are justified by the code i cannot refuse to carry them forward. i bear you no ill-will. de b. thank you. you will, then, be pleased to hear that i have abandoned my intention to apply for a decree. we have still three days—you must arrest these proceedings at once. lach. three days ?_ say, rather, three hours! .de b. what do you mean ? ‘ _ _ lach. (producing telegram). i have just heard that the great case of dupin against the paris, lyon, and mediterranean was unexpectedly settled this morning. your application will come before the court this afternoon. my pirtner, martel, will be there to represent you. dc b. this afternoon ? lach. in all probability this afternoon. de b. you must stop it by telegram. quick,‘lachaud, there . is not a moment to lose. lach. impossible. a case of such importance cannot be withdrawn at the last‘ moment by telegram. all the afiidavits are before the court, and no earthly power can stop it now. de b. (significantly). you are wrong, lachaud—you are wrong. for instance, if i were to die lach. ah! if you were to die—— ‘ ' de b. the death of a plaintiff puts a stop to all personal actions. lach. no doubt, but ' [de bs :vn.le turns away from lachaud, and takes a small phial from his waistcoat ocket. lachaitd watches him closely. as dr. brevilij'‘. is about to take out the stopper, lachaud rushes at him, and in the struggle the phial falls, broken, to the ground. de b. (furiously, during struggle). devil take you, let me go! curse you! let go, i say! lach. you'll not leave this house in your present state of mind. "(struggling with de bm’;v lle.) come come, be reasonable! de b. i tell you i am resolved. lacb. and so am i. great heavens, man, do you think-i am . . zhe fortune-huv/ea. cuthbert lunges, de breville stands bolt upright throws up both arms, and receives sir. cuthbert's point in his breast. he staggers for a moment, and falls round into sir cuthbert's arms. sir c. my god, he has killed himself! lachaud—witness that he threw up his guard intentionally. lachaud—call a doctor—alarm the house! [exit lachaud, hurriedly. de b. (as sir. cuthbert lays him tenderly on a cushion). ah, sir cuthbert—my friend—ever my friend, and my truest friend now—of all the kindly offices you have done me, this last is the best and the kindliest ! sir c. but why, in heaven's name, have you forced me to this de b. there is no time for details—enough that it became necessary that i should efface myself, and to do so, i forced this quarrel upon you. as a dying man i tell you that i am sorry and ashamed. enter duchess, lachaud, servants, visitors, and lastly diana. duch. for pity's sake, sir cuthbert, what has happened? what does this mean de b. madame, i have been most gravely wounded by sir cuthbert in a fair and honourable encounter which i violently forced upon him. he had no alternative; lachaud will tell you so. diana! (she kneels by him and supports him.) i have most grievously wronged you, and i implore you to believe my dying words that i repent from my very heart. i—i entreat you to kiss me, for i die. (she kisses him.) cuthbert —my friend—my old friend-you will forgive me for causing you this pain? ah, it was the only way! sir c. my poor de bréville! (takes his hand.) de b. i thank you. i am grieved to give you so much trouble, duchess (duchess is weeping), but # was much in the way of everybody—and when one is in everybody's way it behoves one to withdraw. cuthbert—my old friend—you will take good care of diana–i know you will take good care. (dies.) - ("rtain. dramatis personae gods. jupiter • * * - - - ... mr. john maclean. apollo aged ... • * * - - - ... mr. f. sullivan. mars deities • * * • * * ... mr. wood. diana • * * ... mrs. h. leigh. mercury ... • * * - - - - ... miss e. farren. the spians. thespis •- - •- - - - ... mr. j. l. toole. sillimon ... - - - - ... mr. j. g. taylor. timidon • - - - - - - - - - ... mr. marshall. tipscion ... • * * - - - - - ... mr. robert soutar. preposteros • - - - - - ... mr. h. payne. stupidas ... - - - - -- ... mr. f. payne. sparkeion ... - - - - - - - ... mdlle. clary. nicemis - - - - - - - ... miss constance loseby. prettela ... - - - - - ... miss berend. daphne - -- - - ... miss annie tremaine. cymon - - • * * - ... miss l. wilson. act i. ruined temple on the summit of olympus. act ii. the same scene, with the ruins restored. time in representation: one hour and three-quarters. thespis ; or, the gods grown old. i’m the slave of the gods, neck and heels, and i'm bound to obey, though i rate at ‘em ; and i not only order their meals, _ but i cook ‘em, and serve ’em, and wait at ’em. then i make all their nectar-- do— (which is terrible liquor to rack us is) and whenever i mix thern a brew, why all the thanksgivings are bacchus's ! well, well, it’s the way of the world, &o. then reading and writing i teach, and spelling-books many i‘ve edited ! and for bringin those arts within reach, that donkey iinerva gets credited. then i scrape at the stars with a knife, and plate-powder the moon (on the days for it), and i hear all the world and his wife awardin diana the praise for it ! vell, well, it's the way of the world, &c. [after s ng—very loud and majestic mus't'c is heard. dia. and mer. (looking of). why, who’s this ? jupiter, by jove! enter juriter, an emtremely old man, very decrepit, with ve-- thin straggling white beard, he wears a long braidai dressing-gown, handsomely trimmed, and a silk m'ght—cap on his head. mercury falls back respectfully as he enters. jup. good day, diana—ah apollo—well, well, well, what’s the matter p what’s the matter ? dia. why, that young scamp mercury says that we do nothing, and leave all the duties of olympus to him ! will you believe it, he actually says that our influence on earth is dropping down to nil. . jup. well, well—don’t be hard on the lad—to tell you the truth, i'm not sure that he’s very far wrong. don’t let it go any further, but, between ourselves, the sacrifices and votive oilerings have fallen off terribly of late. why, i can remember the time when people offered us human sacrifices-—no mistake about it—hurnan sacrifices ! think of that! dia. ah! those good old days ! jnp. then it fell off to oxen, pigs, and sheep. ap. well, there are worse things than oxen, pigs, and sheep. jup. so i’ve found to my cost. my dear sir—between our- selves, it’s dropped oil‘ from one thing to another until it has positively dwindled down to preserved australian beef ! what do you think of that ? a ». i don’t like it at all. thespis, or, the gods growm ozd. enter sparkeion and nicemis climbing mountain at back. spark. here we are at last on the very summit, and we’ve left the others ever so far behind! why, what's this? nice. a ruined palace : a palace on the top of a mountain. i wonder who lives here? some mighty king, i dare say, with wealth beyond all counting, who came to live up here— sp. to avoid his creditors! it's a lovely situation for a country house, though it's very much out of repair. nice. very inconvenient situation sp. inconvenient p nice. yes—how are you to get butter, milk, and eggs up here ? no pigs—no poultry—no postman. why, i should go mad. sp. what a dear little practical mind it is ! what a wife you will make! nice. don’t be too sure—we are only partly married—the marriage ceremony lasts all day. sp. i’ve no doubt at all about it. we shall be as happy as a king and queen, though we are only a strolling actor and actress. nice. it's very kind of thespis to celebrate our marriage day by giving the company a pic-nic on this lovely mountain. sp. and still more kind to allow us to get so much ahead of all the others. discreet thespis! - [kissing her. nice. there now, get away, do! remember the marriage ceremony is not yet completed. sp. but it would be ungrateful to thespis's discretion not to take advantage of it by improving the opportunity. mice. certainly not; get away. sp. on second thoughts the opportunity’s so good it don't admit of improvement. there ! [kisses her. nice. how dare you kiss me before we are quite married? sp. attribute it to the intoxicating influence of the mountain alr. nice. then we had better go down again. it is not right to expose ourselves to luences over which we have no control. -sparkeion and nicemis. sp. refar away from all the world, dissension and derision, ith nature's wonders all unfurled to our delighted vision, yhespis; or, the god.s"_grow./v old. with no one here (at least in sight) to interfere with our delight, and two fond lovers sever, oh do not free, thine hand from mine, i swear to thee . my love is thine, . for ever and for ever ! n ice. on mountain top the air is keen, and most exhilarating, and we say things we do not mean in moments_ less elating. so lease to wait, or thoughts that crop, en teite-$ -téte, on mountain top, may not exactly tally with those that you may entertain, returning to the sober plain of.yon relaxing valley. sp. very well—if you won’t have anything to‘say to me, i know who will. . . nice. who will ? sp. daphne will. " nice. daphne would flirt with anybody. sp. anybody would flirt with daphne. she is quite as pretty as ou and has twice as much back-hair. nice. s e.has twice as much money, which may account for it. “ sp. at all events, she has appreciation. she likes good looks. nice. we all like what we haven’t got. sp. she keeps her eyes open. ‘ nice. yes—one of them. sp. which one ?' nice. the one she doesn’t wink with. sp. well, i was engaged to her for six months and if she still makes eyes at me, you must attribute it to force of habit. besides—remember—we are only half-married at present. nice. i suppose you mean that you are going to treat me as shamefully as you treated her. very well, break it off if you like. i shall not offer any objection. thespis used to be very attentive to me, and i’d just as soon be a manager’s wife as _a fifth-rate actors! "' ' yhespis; or, the gods grown old. chorus heard, at first below, then enter darhne, pretteia, pberosteeos, sturrdas, tirseion, cymon, and other members of teesrls’ company climbing over rocks at back. all carry small baskets. cnonus—(wizh dance).* climbing over rocky mountain, skipping rivulet and fountain, passmg where the willows quiver, by the ever rolling river, swollen with the summer rain. threading long and leafy mazes, dotted with unnumbered daisies, scaling rough and rugged passes, climb the hardy lads and lasses, till the mountain-top they gain. first voice. fill the cup and tread the measure, make the most of fleeting leisure, hail it as a true ally, though it perish bye and bye ! second voice. every moment brings a treasure of its own especial pleasure, though the moments quickly die, greet them gaily as they fly ! third voice. far away from grief and care, high up in the mountain air, let us live and reign alone, in a world that’s all our own. fourth voice. here enthroned in the sky, far away from mortal eye, we‘ll be gods and make decrees, those may honour them who lease. chorus. fill the cup and tre d '. e measure, etc. after ceoens and courlsrrs enter thesris climbing over rocks. thes. bless you, my people, bless you. let the revels com- mence. after all, for thorough, unconstrained unconventional enjoyment give me a pic-nic. prep. (very gloomily). give him a pic-nic somebody! thes. be quiet preposteros—d n’t interrupt. prep. ha ha! shut up again! but no matter. [sturidas endeavours, in pantomime, to reconcile him. throughout the scene prer. shows symptoms‘ of breaking out into a furious passion, and sturidas does all he can to pacify and restrain him. thes. the best of a pic-nic is that everybody contributes what he pleases, and nobody knows what anybody else has * afterwards tran.'fpenzan¢¢'," nznspzs,-tor, the cops arson/ v old. ;; brought till the last moment. now, unpack everybody, and let’s see what there is for everybody. nice. i have brought you—a bottle of soda water—for the claret-cup. daph. i have brought you—a lettuce for the lobster salad. sp. a piece of ice—for the claret-cup. prett. a bottle of vinegar—for the lobster-salad. cymon. a bunch of burrage for the claret-cup! tips. a hard-boiled egg-—for the lobster salad ! slup. one lump of sugar for the claret-cup! prep. he has brought one lump of sugar for the claret-cup ? ha! ha! ha! [laughing melodramatically. stup. well, preposteros, and what have you brought? prep. have brought two lumps of the very best salt for the lobster salad. thes. oh-—is that all? prep. all! ha! ha! he asks if it is all! [sturidas consoles him. thee. but, i say—this is capital so far as it goes—nothing could be better, but it doesn’t go far enough. the claret, for instance! i don’t insist on claret—or a obster—i don’t insist on lobster, but a lobster salad without a lobster, why, it isn’t lobster salad. here, tipseion ! tirseion (a very drunken bloated fellow, dressed, however, with scrupulous accuracy and wearing a large medal round his neck). my master? [falls on his knees to thes. and kisses his robe. thes. get up—don’t be a fool. where’s the claret? w arranged last week that you were to see to that ? tips. true, dear master. but then i was a drunkard! thes. you were. tips. you engaged me to play convivial parts on the strength of my personal appearance. thes. i did. tips. you then found that my habits interfered with my duties as low comedian. thes. true— — tips. you said yesterday that unless i took the pledge you would dismiss me from your company. thes. quite so. tips. good. i have taken it. it is all i have taken since yesterday. my preserver ! [embraces him. thes. yes, but where’s the wine? tips. i left it behind, that i might not be tempted to violate my pledge. rzzzspzs; on, the cops growmold. r " i‘. prep. minion ! " ' ' . [attempts to get at him, i- restrained by sturidas; thee. now, preposteros, what is the matter with you? ' prep. it is enough that i am down-trodden in; my pro-' fession. i will not submit to imposition out of _it. - lt'. is enough that as your heavy villain i get the worst of it every night in a combat of six. i will not submit to insult in the day time. i have come out, hal ha ! to enjoy myself! . ‘_ thes. but look here, you know—‘virtue only triumphs at night from seven to ten—vice gets the best of it during the other twenty-three hours. won’t that satisfy you ? _ _ "' [sturmas endeavours to paotfy him‘. prep. (irritated to stur.). ye are odious to‘ my sight! get outofit! ' — . " stup. (t great terror). what have i done? thes. now what is it, preposteros, what is‘ it ? _ prep. i a—hate him and would have his life! ' ' . ' ‘ - t/zes. (to stu >.). that’s it—he hates you and would have your life. now go and be merry. ‘ " ‘ ‘ ' " ‘ " stup. yes, but why does he hate me ? _ ‘ ' ‘ thes. oh—exactly. (to _’eer.)* why do yonihdte him? ' ' prep. because he isarninion!_' . ‘ = _ " ' tires. he hates you because you'r" jre.tii'ntlnlbn. »‘ 't'explhine itself. now go and enjoy yourselves. ha! hell "“'it‘is well'for those who can laugh—let themdo so—there is no extra charge. the light-hearted cup and the convivial jest‘ for them—but .for ine—what is there for me? . ' sillimon. there is some claret cup and lobstersalad. i . ' ‘ [handing some. thee. (taking it). thank you. " (reauming.) what is there for me but anxiety—ceaseless gnawing anxiety that tears at my very vitals and rends my peace of mind asunder? there is nothing whatever for me but anxiety of the nature i have just described. the charge of these thoughtless revellers is my unhappy lot. it is not a small charge, and"itis rightly termed a lot, because they are many. oh why’did the gods make me a manager? . - sill. (as guessinga riddle). why did the gods make him a manager? ' '- sp. why did the gods make him a manager? dap. why did the gods make him a manager ? prctt. why did the gods make him a manager ? thea. no-—no—what are you talking about? what do you mean ? ‘ ‘ ' dap. i’ve got it—don’t tell us——- i!{esp s,"o \’, ’ y{e gods grown old. all. no—no—because—because—- thcs. (annoyed). it isn't a conundrum—it’s a misanthropical question. why cannot i joinyou? [retires up centre. dap. (who is sitting with srarkeion to the annoyance of n roams who is crying alone). i’m sure i don’t know. we do not want you. don’t distress yourself on our account—we are getting on very comfortably-—_aren’t we, sparkeion ? spar. we are so happy that we don’t miss the lobster or the claret. what are lobster and claret compared with the society of those we love ? [embracing darnue. dap. why, nicemis, love, you are eating nothing. aren’t you happy, dear ? nice. (spitefnlly). you are quite welcome to my share of everything. i intend to console myself with the society of my manager. [takes tnnsris’ arm afectionately. thes. here i say—this wgn’t do, you know—i can’t allow it —at least before my company—besides, you are half married to sparkeion, sparkeion, here's your half-wife impairing my influence before my company. don’t you know the story of the gentleman who undermined his influence by associating with his inferiors ? all. yes, yes,—we know it. prep. (furiously). i do not know it! it’s ever thus l doomed to disappointment from my earliest years . [sturn)as endeavours to console him. thes. there—that's enough. preposteros—you shall hearit. . soxe.-trmsrrs. i once knew a chap who discharged a function on the north south east west diddlesex junction, he was conspicuous exceeding, for his affable ways and his easy breeding. although a chairman of directors, he was hand in glove with the ticket inspectors, he tipped the guards with bran-new fivers, and sang little songs to the engine drivers. ’twas told to me with great compunction, by one who had discharged with.unction, a chairman of directors function, on the north south east west diddlesex junction. fol diddle, lol diddle, lol lol lay. each christmas day he gave each stoker a silver shovel and a golden poker, he’d button-hole flowers for the ticket sorters, and rich bath-buns for the outside porters. thespis ; or, the gods; grown old. he’d mount the clerks on his first-class hunters, and he built little villas for the road-side shunters, and if any were fond of pigeon shooting. he'd ask them down to his place at tooting. ’twas told to me, etc. in course of time there spread a rumour that he did all this from a sense of humour, so instead of signalling and stoking, they gave themselves up to a course of joking. whenever they knew that he was riding, they shunted his train on lonely siding, or stopped all night in the middle of a tunnel, on the plea that the boiler was a-coming through the funnel. ‘twas told to me, etc. if he wished to go to perth or stirling, his train through several counties whirling, would set him down in a fit of lurking, at four a.m. in the wilds of barking. this pleased his whim and seemed to strike it, but the general public did not like it, the receipts fell, after a few repeatings, and he got it hot at the annual meetings, ‘twas told to me, etc. he followed out his whim with vigour, the shares went down to a nominal figure, these are the sad results proceeding from his affable ways and his easy breeding l the line, with its rails and guards and peelers, was sold for a song to marine store dealers, the shareholders are all in the work’us, and he sells pipe-lights in the regent circus. ’twas told to me with much compunction, by one who had discharged with unction a chairman of director's function, _ on the north south east west diddlesex junction, fol diddle lol diddle lol lol lay ! [after song. zes. it’s very hard. as a man i am naturally of an easy disposition. as a manager, i am compelled to hold myself aloof, that my influence may not be deteriorated. as a man, i am inclined to fraternize with the pauper—as a manager i am compelled to walk about like this: don’t know yah! don’t know yah! don’t know yah ! [strides haughtily about the stage. j uriter, mans and arollo, in full olympian costume appear on the three broken columns. thespians scream. jupiter, mars and apollo (in recit.). presumptuous mortal! thes. (same business). don’t know yah! don’t know yah! thespis ; , the cops grown old. jup. mars and apollo (seated on three broken pillars, still in recit.). presumptuous mortal! . thes. i do not know you, i do not know you. jup., mars and apollo (standing on ground, recit.) pre- sumptuous mortal! thes. (recit.). remove this person. [stur. and paar. seize aroll. and mars. jup. (speaking). stop, you evidently don’t know me. allow me to offer you my card. [throws flash paper. thes. ah yes, it’s very pretty, but we don’t want any at present. when we do our christmas piece i’ll let you know. (changing his manner.) look here, you know, this is a private party and we haven’t the pleasure of your acquaintance. there area good many other mountains about, if you must have ' a mountain all to yourself. don’t make me let myself down before my company. (_resuming.) don’t know yah! don’t know yah! jup. i am jupiter, the king of the gods. this is apollo. this is mars. [all kneel to them emcept thesris. thes. oh! then as i’m a respectable man, and rather par- ticular about the company i keep, i think i’ll go. jup. no-—no—stop a bit. we want to consult you on a matter of great importance. there! now we are alone. who are you ? thes. iam thespis of the thessalian theatres. jup. the very man we want. now as a judge of what the public likes, are you impressed with my appearance as the father of the gods? thes. well to be candid with you, i am not. in fact i’m disappointed. jup. disappointed? thes. yes, you see you’re so much out of repair. no, you don’t come up to my idea of the part. bless you, i’ve played you often. jup. you have! thes. to be sure i have. jup. and how have you dressed the part? thes. fine commanding party in the prime of life. thunder- bolt—ful beard—dignified manner—a good deal of this sort of thing “don’t know yah! don’t know yah! don’t know yah! " _ [imitating, crosses l. jup. (much afected). i—i’m very much obliged to you. it’s very good of you. i—i—i used to be like that. i can’t tell you how much i feel it. and do you find i’m an impressive character to play ? zzzespis, oa, zzzz go/ds growm o/ld. thes. well no, i can’t say you are. in fact we don't use you much out of burlesque. jup. burlesque ! [offended, walks up. thes. yes, it's a painful subject, drop it, drop it. the fact is, you are not the gods you were—you're behind your age. jup. well, but what are we to do? we feel that we ought to do something, but we don’t know what. thes. why don't you all go down to earth, incog, mingle with the world, hear and see what people think of you, and judge for yourselves as to the best means to take to restore your influence? jup. ah, but what's to become of olympus in the mean- time? thes. lor bless you, don't distress yourself about that. i’ve a very good company, used to take long "parts on the shortest notice. invest us with your powers and we'll fill your places till you return. jup. (aside). the offer is tempting. but suppose you fail? thes. fail! oh, we never fail in our profession. we’ve nothing but great successes ! - jup. then it's a bargain? thes. it's a bargain. [they shake hands on it. jup. and that you may not be entirely without assistance, we will leave you mercury, and whenever you find yourself in a difficulty you can consult him. enter mercury (trap c.) quartette. jup, so that's arranged—you take my place, my boy, while we make trial of a new existence. at length i shall be able to enjoy the pleasures i have envied from a distance. mer. compelled upon olympus here to stop, while other gods go down to play the hero, don't be surprised if on this mountain top you find your mere down at zero! ap. to earth away to nortal acts, and gather fre rials to write on, investigate mo several facts, that i for ave thrown some light on . dian. i, as them. with crescent bow, have a a light to nightly scandal, i musts ke to go below, and game is worth the candle ! - thespis, or, //e gods growm old. enter all the thespians, summoned by mercury. mer. here come your people ! thes. people better now ! air.—thespis. while mighty jove goes down below with all the other deities, i fill his place and wear his “clo,” the very part for me it is. to mother earth to make a track, they all are spurred and booted, too, and you will fill, till they come back, the parts you best are suited to. chorus. here's a pretty tale for future iliads and odyssies, mortals are about to personate the gods and goddesses. now to set the world in order, we will work in unity, jupiter's perplexity is thespis's opportunity. chorus. chorus, solo.—sparkeion. phoebus am i, with golden ray, the god of day, the god of day, when shadowy night has held her sway, i make the goddess fly. 'tis mine the task to wake the world, in slumber curled, in slumber curled, by me her charms are all unfurled, the god of day am i? the god of day, the god of day, that part shall our sparkeion play. ha! ha ! &c. the rarest funland rarest fare, that ever fell to mortal share ! ha! ha ! &c. solo.—nicemis. i am the moon, the lamp of night. i show a light—i show a light. with radiant sheen i put to flight the shadows of the sky. by my fair rays, as you're aware, gay lovers swear—gay lovers swear, while greybeards sleep away their care, the lamp of night am ii the lamp of night—the lamp of night, nicemis plays, to her delight. ha! ha ! ha i ha ! the rarest fun and rarest fare, that ever fell to mortal share. ha ha ! ha ! ha ! zaaspis, or, he gods grown old. act ii. scene.—the same scene as in act i., with the exception that in place of the ruins that filled the foreground of the stage, the interior of a magnificent temple is seen, showing the back- ground of the scene of act i, through the columns of the portico at the back. high throne l.u.e. low seats below it. all the substitue gods and goddesses (that is to say, thespians) are discovered grouped in picturesque attitudes about the stage, eating, drinking, and smoking, and singing the following verses — chorus. of all symposia, the best by half, upon olympus, here, await us, we eat ambrosia, and nectar quaff— it cheers but don't inebriate us. we know the fallacies of human food, so please to pass olympian rosy, we built up palaces, where ruins stood, and find them much more snug and cosy. solo—sillimon. to work and think, my dear, up here, would be, £ height of conscientious folly, so eat and drink, my dear, i like to see, young people gay-young people jolly. olympian food, my love, i'll lay long odds, will please your lips—those rosy portals, what is the good, my love of being gods, if we must work like common mortals? chorus. of all symposia, &c. [exeunt all but nicemis, who is dressed as dr. pretteia, who is dressed as venus. t. sillimon's arm and bring him down. thespis; or, the gods_ groi/vn old. sillimon. bless their little hearts, i can refuse them nothing. as the olympian stage-manager i ought to be strict with them and make them do their duty, but i can’t. bless their little hearts, when i see the prettylittle craft come sailing up to me with it wheedling smile on their pretty little figure-heads, i can’t turn my back on ’em. i'm all bow, though i’m sure i try to be stern ! p.rett. you certainly are a dear old thing! sill. she says i’m a dear old thing! deputy vcnus says i'm a dear old thing ! nice. it’s her'affectionate habit to describe everybody in those terms. i am more particular, but still even i am bound to admit that you are certainly a very dear old thing. sill. deputy venus says i’m a dear old thing, and deputy diana, who is much more particular, endorses it! who could be severe with such deputy divinities? . prett. do you know, i’m going to ask you a favour. sill. venus is going to ask me a favour ! prett. you see, i am venus. sill. n one who saw your face would doubt it. nice. (aside). no one who knew her character would. prett. well venus, you know, is married to mars. sill. to vulcan, my dear, to vulcan. the exact connubial relation of the different gods and goddesses is a point on which we must be extremely particular. prett. i beg your pardon—venus is married to mars. nice. if she isn’t married to mars, she ought to be. sill. then that decides it—call it married to mars. prett. married to vulcan or married to mars, what does it signify ? sill. my dear, it’s a matter on which i have no personal feeling whatever. prett. so that she is married to some one! ’ sill. exactly! so that she is married to some one. call it married to mars. prett. now here‘s my difficulty. presumptios takes the place of mars, and presumptios is my father! sill. then why object to vulcan? prett. because vulcan is my grandfather! sill. but, my dear, what an objection! you are playing a part till the real gods return. that‘s all! whether you are supposed to be married to your father—or your grandfather, what does it matter? this passion for realism is the curse of the stage! prett. that’s all very well, but i can’t throw myself into a thespis; or, the gods grown old. part that has already lasted a twelvemonth, when i have to make love to my father. it interferes with my conception of the characters. it spoils the part. sill. well, well, i‘ll see what can be done. (emit pretteia l.u.e.) that's always the way with beginners, they’ve no imaginative power. a true artist ought to be superior to such considerations. (nicemis comes down r.) well, nicemis—i should say diana—what’s wrong with you? don’t you like your part? nice. oh, immensely! it’s great fun. sill. don’t you find it lonely out by yourself all night? nice. oh, but i’m not alone all night! sill. but—i don’t want to ask any injudicious questions- but who accompanies you ? nice. who? why sparkeion, of course. sill. sparkeion? well, but sparkeion is phoebus apollo. (enter srmekaroe) ho’s the sun, you know. nice. of course he is; i should catch my death of cold, in the night air, if he didn’t accompany me. sp. my dear sillimon, it would never do for a young lady to be out alone all night. it wouldn't be respectable. sill.. there's a good deal of truth in that. but still—the sun-—at night—i don’t like the idea. the original diana always went out alone. nice. i hope the original diana is no rule for me. after all, what does it matter '? _ sill. to be sure—what does it matter? sp. the sun at night, or in the daytime! sill. so that he shines. ' ‘hat’s all that’s necessary. (e-xit nicemis r.u.e.) but poor daphne, what will she say to this? sp. oh, daphne can console herself; young ladies soon get over this sort of thing. did you never hear of the young lady who was engaged to cousin robin ? sill. never. sp. then i’ll sing it to you. so ~ o-srankaron. little maid of arcadee sat on cousin robin's knee, thought in form and face and limb, nobody could rival him. he was brave and she was fair. truth, they made a pretty pair. happy little maiden, she- happy maid of arcadee! thesp s; or, the gods grown old. moments fled as moments will happily enough, until, after, say, a month or two, robin did as robins do. weary of his lover’s play, jilted her and went away. wretched little maiden, she- wretched maid of arcadee l to her little home she crept, there she sat her down and wept, maiden wept as maidens will- grew so thin and pale—until cousin richard came to woo ! then again the roses grew! happy little maiden, she— happy maid of arcadee! [emit sraekerou. sill. well, mercury, my boy, you’ve had a year’s experience of us here. how do we do it? i think we’re rather an improve- ment on the original gods—don’t you ? mer. well, you see, there’s a good deal to be said on both sides of the question; you are certainly younger than the original gods, and, therefore, more active. they are certainly experience. £lh 'l s id - sono.—mnncunr. olympus is now in a terrible muddle, the deputy deities all are at fault ; they splutter and splash like a pig in a puddle, and dickens a one of ’em’s earning his salt. for thespis as jove is a terrible blunder, too nervous and timid-—too easy and weak— whenever he’s called on to lighten or thunder, the thought of it keeps him awake for a week ! then mighty mars hasn't the pluck of a parrot, when left in the dark he will quiver and quail ; and vulcan has arms that would snap like a carrot, before he could drive in a tenpenny nail ! then venus’s freckles are very repelling. and venus should not have a squint in her eyes ; the learned minerva is weak in her spelling, and scatters her 's all over the skies. then pluto, in kindhearted tenderness erring, can't make up his mind to let anyone die— the times has a paragraph ever recurring, “ remarkable instance of longevity.” on some it has come as a serious onus, t' others it’s quite an advantage-—in short, while ev’ry life office declares a big bonus, the poor undertakers are all in the court! on the other hand, older than you, and have, therefore, more on the whole i prefer you, because your mistakes thespis; or, the gods grown old. then cupid, the rascal, forgetting his trade is to make men and women impartially smart, will only shoot at pretty young ladies, and never takes aim at a bachelor's heart. the results of this freak—or whatever you term it — should cover the wicked young scamp with disgrace, while ev’r_v young mzn is as shy as a hermit, young ladies are popping all over the place ! this wouldn’t much matteréfor bashful and shy men, when skilfully handled, are certainjto fall, but, alas ! that determined young bachelor hymen refuses to wed anybody at all ! he swears that love’s flame is the vilest of arsons, and looks upon marriage as quite a mistake ; now, what in the world’s to become of the parsons, and what of the artist who sugars the cake? in short, you will see from the facts that i’m showing, the state of the case is exceedingly sad; ' if thespis’s people go on as they’re going, olympus will certainly go to the bad ! from jupiter downwards there isn't a dab in it, all of ’em uibble and sheff’e and shirk ; a premier in owning street, forming a cabinet, couldn't find people less fit for their work ! enter tuesris, l.u.e. thes. sillimon, you can retire. sill. sir, i— the:. don't pretend you can’t when i say you can. i’ve seen you do it—go! (emit sillimon bowing emtmvagantly, thesris imitates him.) well, mercury, i’ve been in power one year to-day. mer. one year to-day. how do you like ruling the world ? thee. like it ! why it’s as straightforward as possible. why there hasn’t been a hitch of any kind since we came up here. lor! the airs you gods and goddesses give yourselves are perfectly sickening. why it’s more child’s play l mer. very simple, isn’t it ? thes. simple? why i could do it on my head ? mer. ah—i daresay you will do it on your head very soon. t/ms. what do you mean by that, mercury? mer. i mean that when you’ve turned the world quite topsy- turvey you won’t know whether you’re standing on your head or your heels. thes. well, but, mercury, it’s all right at present. h --r- ;__,; -w,..__ thespis; r,‘t./{e gkotfilfivfitii‘ mer. oh yes—as far as we know. . . . -. . thes. well, but, you know, we know as much‘ as anybody knows; you know_, ibelieve, that"the worl_d’s still going on. zller. yes—as far as we can judge/—_n_ uch as usual. . thes. well, then, give the father of the drama his due, mercury. don’t be envious of the father of the drama. thes. well, but you see you leave so much to accident. mer. well, mercury, if i do, it’s my principle. i am an easy man, and i like to make things as pleasant as possible. \vhat did i do the day we took office ? why i called the company together and i said to them: “ here we are, you know, gods and goddesses, no mistake about it, the real thing. well, we have certain duties to discharge, let’s discharge them .intelligently. don’t let us be hampered by routine and red tape and pre- cedent, let’s set the original gods an example, and put a liberal interpretation on our duties. if it occurs to any one to try an experiment in hisown department, let him try it, if he fails there’s no harm done, if he succeeds it is a distinct gain to society. take it easy,” i said, “and at the same time, make experiments. don’t hurry your work, do it slowly, and do it well.” and here we are after atwelvemonth, and not a single complaint or a single petition has reached me. jller. no—not yet. _ thes. what do you mean by “ no, not yet” ? mer. well, you see, you don’t understand these things. all the petitions that are addressed by men to jupiter pass through my hands, and it’s my duty to collect them and present them once a year. . fllzes. oh, only once a year ? . jller. only once a year. thes. and the year is up+? ' mer. ' ‘o-day. _ thes. oh, then i suppose there are some complaints?- mer. yes, there are some. ' . ‘ thes. (disturbed). oh. perhaps there are a good many . mer. there are a good many. thes. oh. perhaps there are a thundering lot? mer. there are a thundering lot. thes. (very much. disturbed). oh .l . mer. you see you’ve been taking it so very easy—andi sir have most of your company. ‘ thes. oh, who has been taking it easy " mir. well, all except those who ‘have been trying experii men s. _ thes. well but i suppose the experiments are ingenious“?' thespis ; or, the gods grown old. mer. yes; they are ingenious, but on the whole ill-judged. but it’s time to go and summon your court. thes. what for? mer. to hear the complaints. in five minutes they will be here. [exit. thes. (very uneasy). i don’t know how it is, but there is something in that young man’s manner that suggests that the father of the gods has been taking it too easy. perhaps it would have been better if i hadn’t given my company so much scope. i wonder what they’ve been doing. i think i will curtail their discretion, though none of them appear to have much of the article. it seems a pity to deprive ’em of what little they have. . enter darhne, weeping. thes. now then, daphne, wha’’ the matter with you? daphne. well, you know how disgracefully sparkeion—- —- thes. (correcting her). apollo daphne. apollo, then—has treated me. he promised to marry me years ago, and now he’s married to nicemis. thes. now look here. i can’t go into that. you’re in olympus now and must behave accordingly. drop your daphne—assume your calliope. dap. quite so. that’s it! [mysteriously. thes. oh-—that is it? [puzzled dap. that is it, thespis. i am calliope, the muse of fame. very good. this morning i was in the olympian library, and i took down the only book there. here it is. thes. (taking it). lempriere’s classical dictionary. the olympian peerage. dap. open it at apollo. thes. (lppegis it). it is done. dap. a . thes. “apollo was several times married, among others to issa, boliua, coronis, chymene, cyrene, chione, acacallis, and calliope.” dap. and calliope. thes. (musing). ha ! i didn’t know he was married to them. dap. (severely). sir! this is the family edition. thes. quite so. dap. you couldn’t expect a lady to read any other ? thes. on no consideration. but in the original version—— dap. i go by the family edition. thes. then by the family edition, apollo is your husband. . '*rn— ‘c aj_';"- thespis; or, the gods grown old. enter nrcemis and smskeroe. ' nice. apollo your husband? he is my husband. dap. i-beg your pardon. he is my husband. nice. apollo is sparkeion, and he’s married to me. dap. sparkeion is apollo, and he’s married to me. nice. he’s my husband. dap he’s your brother. _ flies. look here, ‘apollo, whose husband are you? don’t let’s have any row about it; whose husband are you? sp. upon my honour i don’t know. i’m in a very delicate position, but i‘ll fall in with any arrangement thespis may propose. dap. i’ve just found out that he’s my husband, and yet he goes out every evening with that “thing” ! thes. perhaps he’s trying an experiment. dap. i don’t like my husband to make such experiments. the question is, who are we all and what is our relation to each other. _ quartettec sp. you’re diana, i’m apollo— and calliope is she. dap. he’s you’re brother. nice. you’re another. he has fairly married me, dap. by the rules of this fair spot i’m his wife, and you are not- sp. and dap. by the rules of this fair spot, : . } his wife, and you are not. nice. by this golden wedding ring, i’m his wife, and you‘re a “ thing." dap., nice, and sp. ey this golden wedding ring, stands} his wife, and you’re a “ thing.” all. please will some one kindly tell us, who are our respective kin? all of {slim } are very jealous, neither of { ghsem will give in. nice. he’s my husband i declare, i espoused him properlee. sp. that is true, for i was there, and i szw her marry me. dap. he’s you're brother-—i’m his wife, if we go by lempriére, sp. so she is, upon my life, _ really that seems very fair. n"-‘h you’re my husband and no other. thespis; on, the cons grown old. jup. what did we leave you behindfor ? mer. please sir that’s the question i asked for when you went away. jup. was it not that thespis might consult you whenever he was in a difficulty ? mer. well, here l’ve been, ready to be consulted, chockful of reliable information—running over with celestial maxims-— advice gratis ten to four—after twelve ring the night bell in cases of emergency. jup. and hasn’t he consulted you ? mer not he—he disagrees with me about everything. jup. he must have misunderstood me. i told him to consult you whenever he was in a fix. _ mer. he must have thought you said insult. why when- ever i opened my mouth he jumps down my throat. it isn’t pleasant to have a fellow constantly jumping down your throat —especially when he always disagrees with you. it’s just the sort of thing i can’t digest. jnp. (in a rage). send him here l’ll talk to him. enter teesris. he is much terrified. jup. (recit.). o monster! ap. (recit.). oh monster! jllars (recit.). oh monster! tnesris sings in great terror, which he endeavours to conceal. jug). well sir, the year is up to-day. ap. and a nice mess you’ve made of it. mars. you’ve deranged the whole scheme of society. thes. (aside) there’s going to be a row! (aloud and very familiarly.) my dear boy—i do assure you-—- jup. (in recit.). be respectful! ap. (in recit.). be respectful! mars (in recit.). be respectful! thes. i don’t know what you allude to. with the exception of getting our scene-painter to “run up” this temple, because we found the ruins draughty, we haven’t touched a thing. jup. (in recit.). oh story teller! ap. (in recit.). oh story teller! mars (in recit.). oh story teller! enter tnesrrass. i/zes. my dear fellows, you’re distressing yourselves unneces- sarily. the court of olympus is about to assemble to listen to the complaints of the year, if any. but there are none, or next to none. let the olympians assemble! thespis; on, the $ grown . . enter tmasruus. [tunsris la]..es chair. j ur., ar. and masa sit below him. thea. ladies and gentlemen. it seems that it is usual for the gods to assemble once a year to listen to mortal petitions. it doesn’t seem to me to be a good plan, as work is liable to accumulate; but as i’m particularly anxious not to interfere with olympian precedent, but to allow everything to go on as it has alway been accustomed to go—why, we’ll say no more about it. (aside) but how shall i account for your presence? jup. say we are gentlemen of the press. thea. that all our proceedings may be perfectly open and above-board i have communicated with the most influential members of the athenian press, and i beg to introduce to your notice three of its most distinguished members. they bear marks emblematic of the anonymous character of modern journalism. (business of introdewtiun. thesris very uneasy.) now then, if you’re all ready we will begin. mer. (brings tremendous bundles of petitions). here is the agenda. . t/res. what’s that. the petitions ? mer. some of them. ( pens one and reads.) ah, i thought- there’d be a row about it. thea. why, what’s wrong now ? mer. why, it’s been a foggy friday in november for the last six months and the athenians are tired of it. thes. there’s no pleasing some people. this craving for perpetual change is the curse of the country. friday’s .' very nice day. mer. so it is, but a friday six months long !—it gets monotonous. jnp., a . and mars (in recit. rising.) it’s perfectly ridiculous. ibes. (calling them). it shall be arranged. cymon ! cymon (as time with the usual attributes). sir! thes. (introducing him to three gods). allow me-—father time—rather young at present but even time must have a beginning. in course of time, time will grow older. now then,father time, what’s this about a wet friday in november for the last six months? cym. well, the fact is, l’ve been trying an experiment. seven days in the week is an awkward number. it can’t be halved. two’s into seven won’t go. thes. (tries it on his fingers). quite so—quite so. cym. so i abolished saturday. thl‘sp s; ?, the cops grown old. jup., a . and mars. oh but— — [rising tires. do be quiet. he’s a very intelligent young man and knows what he is about. so you abolished saturday. and how did you find it answer? gym. admirably. t/zes. you hear ? he found it answer admirably. gym. yes, only sunday refused to take its place. thes. sunday refused to take its place ? . cym. sunday comes after saturday—sunday won’t go on duty after friday, sunday’s principles are very strict. that’s where my experiment sticks. t hes. well, but why november ? come, why november? cym. december ean’t begin till november has finished. november can’t finish because he’s abolished saturday. there again my experiment sticks. thes. well, but why wet? come now, why wet? cym. ah, that is your fault. you turned on the rain six months ago, and you forgot to turn it off again. jup., mars and ap. (rvising-—radiative). oh this is monstrous! all. order, order. th.es. gentlemen, pray be seated. to the others.) the liberty of the press, one can’t help it. (tot c three gods.) it is easily settled. athens has had a wet friday in november for the last six months. let them have a blazing tuesday in july for the next twelve. jup., mars and a . but——- all. order, order. thes. now then, the next article. mer. here's a petition from the peace society. they com- plain that there are no more battles. _ mars (springing up). what! t/zes. quiet there ! good dog—soho; timidon ! tim (as mars). here. thes. what’s this about there being no battles ? tim. i’ve abolished battles; it’s an experiment. mars (spz"in_(]’i'r g up). oh come, i say ’i ws. quiet then! (to tim.) abolished battles? tim. yes, you told us on taking office to remember two things, to try experiments and to take it easy. i found i coulcn’t take it easy while there are any battles to attend to, soi tried the experiment and abolished battles. and then i took it easy. the peace society ought to be very much obliged to me. ' thes. obliged to you! why, confound it ! since battles have been abolished war is universal. . thespis; or, the gods grown old. tim. war universal? thes. to be sure it is! now that nations can't fight, no two of ’em are on speaking terms. the dread of fighting was the only thing that kept them civil to each other. let battles be restored and peace reign upreme. mer. (reads). here’s a petition from the associated wine merchants of mytilene. thes. well, what’s wrong with the associated wine merchants of mytilene ? are there no grapes this year? mer. plenty of grapes; more than usual. thes. (to the gods). you observe, there is no deception; there are more than usual. mer. there are plenty of grapes, only they are full of ginger beer. three gods. oh, come i say. [rising, they are put down by thesris. thes. eh? what. (much alarmed.) bacchus? tips. (as baocnos). here! thes. there seems to be something unusual with the grapes of mytilene; they only grow ginger beer. tips. and a very good thing too. thes. it’s very nice in it's way, but it is not what one looks for from grapes. tips. beloved master, a week before we came up here, you insisted on my taking the pledge. by so doing you rescued me from my otherwise inevitable misery. i cannot express my thanks. embrace me l [attempts to embrace him. thes. get out, don’t be a fool. look here, you know you’re the god of wine. tips. i am. thes. (very angry.) well, do you consider it consistent with your duty as the god of wine to make the grapes yield nothing but ginger beer? tips. do you consider it consistent with my duty as a total abstainer, to grow anything stronger than ginger beer? t/zes. but your duty as the god of wine— — tips. in every respect in which my duty as the god of wine can be discharged consistently with my duty as a total . abstainer, i will discharge it. but when the functions clash, everything must give way to the pledge. my preserver ! [attempts to embrace him. thes. don’t be a confounded fool! this can be arranged. we can’t give over the wine this year, but at least we can improve the ginger beer. let all the ginger beer be extracted from it imn ediately. tijespis; or, y'he gods grown old. jup., maw's., ap. (aside). we can’t stand this, we can’t stand this, it's much too strong, we can’t stand this. it would be wrong, extremely wrong, if we stood this, if we stand this, if we stand this, we can’t stand this. - dap., sparkx, nice. great jove, this interference, is more than we can stand ; of them make a clearance, with your majestic hand. jove. this cool audacity, it beats us hollow (removing mask) i’|n jupiter ! mars. i'm mars ! ap. i'm apollo! enter diana and all the other gods and goddesses. all. (kneeling with theirléoz-eheads on the ground). jupiter, are and apollo, have quilted the dwellings of men; the other gods quickly will follow, and what will become of us then. oh, pardon us, jove and apollo, pardon us, jupiter, mars; oh, see us in misery wallow, cursing our terrible stars. enter other gods. ~chor.us and ballet. all the thespians. let us remain, we beg of you pleadiugly ! three gods. let them remain, they beg of us pleadingly ! thea. life on olympus suits us exceedingly. gods. life on olympus suits them exceedingly. thea. let us remain, we pray in humility!- gods. let ’em remain, they pray in humility. thea. . if we have shown some little ability. gods. if they have shown som_e little ability. let us remain, etc. jupiter. enough, your reign is ended ; upon this sacred hill let him be apprehended, and learn our awful will. away to earth, contemptible comedians, and hear our curse, before we set you free ; you shall all be eminent tragedians, whom no one ever goes to see! all. we go to earth, contemptible comedians, we hear his curse before he sets us free, we shall all he eminent tragedians, whom no one ever ever goes to see ! - .! -‘li. . . . . . | ||||| |, b ||| º: |. º \º harvard u c o l l e ge l i b r a ry __ ! shakespeareps library: a collection of the romances, nowels, poem s, and histories, us ed by s h a k e s p e a r e as the foundation of his dramas. now first collected, and accurately reprinted from the or iginal editions. with introductory notices, by j. payne collier, esq. f.s.a. wol. i. london: thomas rodd, , great n e w p or t s t r eet. . . c! a (, , º, * london : compton and r chie, print ers, middle st reet, cloth fair. pr e fa c e. the following work supplies an important defi- ciency in our literature as regards shakespeare: it brings into one view all that has been recovered of the sources he employed, in various degrees, in the composition of such of his dramas as are not derived from grecian, roman, or english history, or were not formed upon some earlier play. the romances, novels, and poems, to which he resorted are scattered over many volumes, some of them of the rarest occurrence, existing only in our public libraries: these are included in the ensuing pages. we have ventured to call the work “shakespeare's library,” since our great dramatist, in all probability, must have possessed the books to which he was indebted, and some of which he applied so directly and minutely to his own purposes. until now the ordinary reader ii preface. of shakespeare's plays has enjoyed very imperfect means of judging how far, and in what respects, our most original poet was obliged to others, and what he owed only to the exhaustless resources of his own mind. he employed the materials supplied by some of his predecessors and contemporaries merely as a great painter uses what is called a lay-figure: he borrowed the position, but invested it himself with drapery, colour, character, and senti- ment. he exceeded all art, by communicating to it life and action. it is remarkable, after all that has been written and accumulated regarding shakespeare during the last century and a half, that it should have been left to us, and to our time, to perform this under- taking, so necessary to the formation of a just esti- mate of his productions. an unsatisfactory attempt of the kind was made about a century ago, and the commentators have here and there furnished ex- tracts from most of the pieces we have reprinted; but those extracts afford no adequate opportunity of judging of the works as a whole. preface. iii the editor has had time to do little more than to afford a general superintendence, and to prepare the introductory notices: the intelligent publisher, who has devoted so much time and study to shakespearian literature, has often saved him the trouble of searching for materials in public and private depositories, and of collating the re- prints with the originals. for this part of the task, therefore, mr. rodd is responsible; and in the per- formance of it he gladly, and thankfully, acknow- ledges the ready assistance he has received from the rev. dr. bandinel, of the bodleian library, oxford, and from the rev. mr. smith, of trinity college library, cambridge. kensington, july , . shakespeare's library. vol. i. contents. greene's pandosto, the story on which is founded the winter's tale. lodge's rosalynd, the novel on which is founded as you like it. the historie of hamblet, the history on which the tragedy of hamlet is constructed. apollonius, prince of tyre, from which the incidents of the play of pericles are derived. introduction to r. g r e e n e's p and ost o. the more we become acquainted with the sources from which shakespeare derived the plots of his dramas, the more room we find to wonder at the extent, power, and variety of his genius. we cannot justly estimate his excellence with- out the knowledge which this publication, and others of a like kind by which it will be followed, are intended to furnish. those who are best informed regarding the productions of his contemporaries and rivals are most ready to admit his immeasurable superiority to all of them. he seems greater by comparison than when judged of by his own positive and separate merits; and this position will be completely esta- blished by the instance before us. robert greene was a man who possessed all the advan- tages of education: he was a graduate of both universities— he was skilled in ancient learning and in modern languages— he had, besides, a prolific imagination, a lively and elegant fancy, and a grace of expression rarely exceeded; yet let any person well acquainted with the winter's tale read the novel of “pandosto,” upon which it was founded, and he will be struck at once with the vast pre-eminence of shake- speare, and with the admirable manner in which he has converted materials supplied by another to his own use. the bare outline of the story (with the exception of shake- speare's miraculous conclusion) is nearly the same in both ; but this is all they have in common, and shakspeare may be said to have scarcely adopted a single hint for his descriptions, . ii introduction. or a line for his dialogue"; while in point of passion and sentiment greene is cold, formal, and artificial: the very op- site of every thing in shakespeare. it is fair to observe, however, that greene ceased to write not long after shakespeare had commenced his career. greene died in september , and the plausible conjecture seems to be, that by this date shakespeare had not composed any of his great works, and had probably not written any thing original for the stage prior to the year or . all the known facts regarding the life of greene may be found in the preliminary matter to the rev. mr. dyce's excellent edition of greene's poetical works. he was certainly an author in , and perhaps before that date. it is a point not hitherto touched, that there was, perhaps, an earlier im- pression of “pandosto” than any yet discovered; but it depends not upon obvious facts or inferences, but upon minute circumstances not worth detailing, and upon a close observation of the errors of the press, which, in the edition of , appear to be those which would be made by a com- positor engaged rather upon a reprint than upon a manu- * some verbal resemblances and trifling obligations have been in- cidentally pointed out by the commentators in their notes to “the winter's tale.” one of the principal instances occurs in activ, sc. , where florizel says, “the gods themselves, humbling their deities to love, have taken the shapes of beasts upon them : jupiter became a bull and bellow'd; the green neptune a ram and bleated; and the fire-rob'd god, golden apollo, a poor humble swain, as i seem now. their transformations were never for a piece of beauty rarer, nor in a way so chaste.” - “this (says malone) is taken almost literally from the novel,” when, in fact, the resemblance merely consists in the adoption by shakespeare of part of the mythological knowledge supplied by greene. “the gods above disdaine not to love women beneath. phoebus liked daphne; jupiter io; and why not i then fawnia?”—wide p. . the resemblance is any thing but literal. g * ~ *, p. st j introduction. iii script." it is a well ascertained fact, that there must have been an earlier edition of one of the same author's pieces (a “quip for an upstart courtier”) than any that has come down to us. as the means of comparison, page by page, and scene by scene, are now for the first time afforded to the modern reader, it is not necessary to point out the particular instances in which shakespeare follows or differs from his original. the variation in the conclusion has already been mentioned: nothing can well be more lame, unsatisfactory, and even offensive than the winding up of greene's novel, where he makes pandosto first fall desperately and grossly in love with his own daughter, and then, without any adequate motive, commit suicide. here the genius of shakespeare triumphed over all competition: he saw at once how the preceding incidents might be converted to a great dramatic and moral purpose, the most pathetic and the most beautiful. in other places the skill and judgment of our great drama- tist are scarcely less conspicuous: as, for instance, in the very outset of his play, where he represents polixenes (the egistus of the novel) as previously prepared to take his departure in his ships, which had only, therefore, to weigh anchor; while in greene's novel the determination of the visitor to quit the kingdom of his royal friend is sudden, and all his vessels have to be got ready on the instant. the variation in the time of the disclosure of the decision of the oracle may also be noticed as a proof of the knowledge shakespeare pos- sessed of dramatic effect. it is, nevertheless, to be admitted, that a mere prose narrative and an acting drama would re- quire different treatment. steevens correctly stated (prel. rem. to the winter's * mr. dyce (greene's works, ii, ) prints from an edition of “pandosto,” as late as a “love-passion,” addressed by dorastus to fawnia, observing that he had met with it in no earlier impression. the poem is unquestionably old, and it may possibly have been taken from the earliest, and now lost, edition of “pandosto.” iv introduction. tale) that “the parts of antigonus, paulina, and autolicus, are of shakespeare's own invention;" but he ought to have added the shepherd's son to the list, and he committed a strange blunder (which shews that he had read greene's work with very little attention), when he asserted that the leontes of shakespeare is the egistus of the novel. pandosto is leontes, and egistus is polixenes. none of the other com- mentators corrected the error, or, perhaps, were able to do so, from not having taken the trouble to go through the incidents in the original story, and to compare them with those of the play. there is one circumstance that ought not to be passed over without observation; and it will serve to strengthen the position, that the tempest was produced anterior to the winter's tale. the rev. mr. hunter, if he have not es- tablished that the tempest was written in (“disqui- sition on the scene, origin, date, &c. of the tempest,” p. ), has at all events shewn that it was written earlier than , to which year malone assigns both it and the winter's tale. (shakespeare, by boswell, ii, ). now, the reason for the opinion, that the winter's tale was posterior in composition to the tempest is this—that, in his novel of “pandosto,” greene describes the turning adrift of fawnia (the perdita of shakespeare) at sea in a boat, very much in the same manner as prospero describes what had happened to himself and miranda under similar circumstances. shake- speare having already employed this species of incident in the tempest, was obliged to vary it in the winter's tale, or he would probably have followed greene's description, which is certainly one of the prettiest and most natural portions of his narrative. shakespeare, also, without any very apparent reason, reverses the scene: his play opens in sicily, and perdita is exposed on the coast of bohemia; while greene's novel begins in bohemia, and fawnia is found by the old shepherd on the coast of sicily. bohemia is, how- ever, over and over again spoken of by greene as a maritime introduction. v country, and shakespeare, supposing he knew better, did not think it worth while to disturb the popular notion. we have the evidence of taylor, the water-poet, in his “travels to prague,” that in it was not considered a piece of very unusual ignorance in an alderman of london not to be aware that “a fleet of ships” could not arrive at a port of bohemia. “pandosto" appears to have been extraordinarily popular, and mr. dyce enumerates twelve editions: to these at least two others are to be added, with which he was not acquainted, viz. in and . no doubt several more have been lost, as we do not find it to have been reprinted between and , a period during which it would probably have been most attractive. the only known copy of the edition of is in the british museum; but it is defec- tive in one place, and we have necessarily been compelled to complete our impression from a later copy. whether the story were the invention of greene, or whether, as was not unusual with him, he adopted it from a foreign language, cannot now be ascertained; but it is not known abroad in any other form than that in which it has been received from this country. it will not be out of place to take some notice here of a production by greene, which mr. dyce had never seen, con- taining a good deal of poetry which ought to have been in- cluded in his two volumes of greene's works. it is asserted by the bookseller to have come from the pen of that prolific author; but at all events he could have had nothing to do with the title-page, which runs thus:—“greenes vision: written at the instant of his death. conteyning a penitent passion for the folly of his pen. sero sed serio. imprinted at london for thomas newman, and are to be sould at his shop in fleetestreete, in saint dunstons churchyard.” it is in to, and in black letter, but without date, though we need not hesitate in assigning it to the close of . it is autobio- graphical, which renders the tract more interesting, and in * vi introduction. the address to the readers, greene expresses deep regret that his lighter pieces had ever been published, adding, “many things i have wrote to get money, which i could otherwise wish supprest: povertie is the father of innumerable infirmi- ties.” the first poem is called “greene's ode on the wa- nitie of wanton writings,” which after six introductory lines, thus speaks of himself under the name of tytirus:— “telling in his song how faire phillis eie-browes and her haire: how her face past all supposes for white lillies and red roses. though he sounded on the hils such fond passions as love wils, that all the swaines that foulded by flockt to heare his harmonie, and vowed by pan that tytirus did poet-like his loves discusse; that men might learne mickle good by the verdict of his mood; yet old menalcas, over-ag'd, that many winters there had wag'd, sitting by and hearing this, said their wordes were all amisse,” &c. the ode is followed by a prayer full of self-reproach, and afterwards the author represents himself as lying down upon his bed, and in a vision seeing chaucer and gower, both of whom he describes in verse. the portrait of chaucer runs thus:– “his stature was not very tall; leane he was, his legs were small, hosd within a stock of red; a buttond bonnet on his head, from under which did hang, iweene, silver haires both bright and sheene. his beard was white, trimmed round, his countenance blithe and merry found. a sleevelesse jacket, large and wide, with many pleights and skirts side, i introduction. vii of water chamlet did he weare. a whittell by his belt he beare. his shoes were corned, broad before ; his inckhorne at his side he wore, and in his hand he bore a booke: thus did this auntient poet looke.” the “description of john gower” may be found extracted in “farther particulars regarding shakespeare and his works,” p. . both are curious, as they were probably derived from some then existing painting or illumination, not now known. in the course of the tract greene acknow- ledges various works, but he especially repudiates “the cobbler of canterbury," which had been falsely attributed to him. he speaks of his “never too late,” printed in , and of his “mourning garment,” as if it were then in the press; but according to mr. dyce ( , cv.) it had been printed two years before. greene’s “repentance,” the title of which is also introduced, bears date in . chaucer and gower discuss the merits and vices of greene's productions, and king solomon is called in as an umpire, who exhorts greene to abandon folly and to seek wisdom. another tract by greene, with a copy of which mr. dyce could never meet, is entitled “the royal exchange,” printed in , and dedicated to the lord mayor of that year. it is a mere prose translation from the italian, and does not contain a line of poetry, nor a word to throw farther light upon greene's history. pandosto. the triumph of time. jwherein is discopered by a pleasant historie, that although by the meanes of sinister fortune, truth may be concealed yet by time in spight of fortune if is most manifestly reuealed. pleasant for age to auoyde drowsie thoughtes, profitable for youth to eschue other wanton pastimes, and bringing to both a de- sired content. temporis filia veritas. * by robert greene, maister of artes in cambridge. omne tulit punctum qui miscuit vtile dulci. imprinted at london by thomas orwin for thomas cadman, dwelling at the signe of the bible, neere wnto the north doore of paules, . to the gentlemen readers health. the paultring poet aphranius, being blamed for troublinge the emperor trajan with so many doting poems, adventured notwithstanding stil to present him with rude and homely verses, excusing himselfe with the courtesie of the emperour, which did as friendly accept, as he fondly offerd. so, gentle- men, if any condemne my rashnesse for troubling your eares with to many unlearned pamphlets, i will straight shroud my selfe under the shadowe of your courtesies, and with aphranius lay the blame on you, as well for frendly reading them, as on my selfe for fondly penning them. hoping, though fond, curious, or rather currish backbiters breathe out slaunderous speeches, yet the courteous readers (whom i feare to offend) will requite my travell at the least with silence : and in this hope i rest, wishing you health and happines. robert greene. to the right honorable george clifford, ea r i, e of cum ber land, robert greene wisheth increase of honour and vertue. the rascians (right honorable), when by long gazing against the sunne they become halfe blinde, recover their sightes by looking on the blacke loade-stone. unicornes, being glutted with brousing on roots of licquoris, sharpen their stomacks with crushing bitter grasse. alexander vouchsafed as well to smile at the croked pic- ture of vulcan, as to wonder at the curious counterfeite of venus. the minde is sometimes delighted as much with simall trifles as with sumptuous triumphs; and as wel pleased with hearing of pans homely fancies, as of hercules re- nowmed laboures. syllie baucis coulde not serve jupiter in a silver plate, but in a woodden dish. al that honour esculapius decke not his shrine with jewels. apollo gives oracles as wel to the poor man for his mite, as to the rich man for his treasure. the stone echites is not so much liked for the colour, as for vertue, and giftes are not to be measured by the worth, but by the will. mison, that unskilfull painter of greece, adven- tured to give unto darius the shielde of pallas, so roughlie shadowed, as he smiled more at the follie of the man, then at the imperfection of his arte. so i present unto your honour the triumph of time, so rudelic finished, as i feare your honour wil rather frowne at my impudencie, then laugh at my igno- a the epistle dedicatorie. rancie: but i hope my willing minde shal excuse my slender skill, and your honours curtesie shadowe my rashnes. they which feare the biting of vipers doe carie in their hands the plumes of a phoenix. phydias drewe vulcan sitting in a chaire of ivory. caesar's crow durst never cry, ave, but when she was pearked on the capitol. and i seeke to shroude this imperfect pamphlet under your honours patronage, doubting the dint of such invenomed vipers, as seeke with their slaunderous reproches to carpe at al, being oftentimes most unlearned of all; and assure myselfe, that your honours renowmed valure, and vertuous disposition shall be a sufficient defence to protect me from the poy- soned tongues of such scorning sycophants; hoping that as jupiter vouchsafed to lodge in philemons thatched cotage, and phillip of macedon to take a bunch of grapes of a country pesant, so i hope your honour, measuring my worke by my will, and wayghing more the mind than the matter, will, when you have cast a glaunce at this toy, with minerva, under your golden target cover a deformed owle. and in this hope i rest, wishing unto you, and the vertuous coun- tesse your wife, such happy successe as your honours can desire or i imagine. your lordships most duetifully to commaunde, robert greene. the historie of dorastus and fawnia. among al the passions where with humane mindes are perplexed, there is none that so galleth with restlesse de- spight as the infectious soare of jealousie; for all other griefes are eyther to bee appeased with sensible perswasions, to be cured with wholesome counsel, to be relieved in want, or by tract of time to be worne out, (jealousie only excepted) which is so sawsed with suspitious doubtes, and pinching mistrust, that whoso seekes by friendly counsaile to rase out this hellish passion, it foorthwith suspecteth that he geveth this advise to cover his owne guiltinesse. yea, who so is payned with this restlesse torment doubteth all, dystrusteth him-selfe, is alwayes frosen with feare and fired with sus- pition, having that wherein consisteth all his joy to be the breeder of his miserie. yea, it is such a heavy enemy to that holy estate of matrimony, sowing betweene the married couples such deadly seedes of secret hatred, as love being once rased out by spightful distrust, there oft ensueth bloudy revenge, as this ensuing hystorie manifestly prooveth; where- in pandosto (furiously incensed by causelesse jealousie) pro- cured the death of his most loving and loyall wife, and his owne endlesse sorrow and misery. in the countrey of bohemia, there raygned a king called pandosto, whose fortunate successe in warres against his foes, and bountifull curtesie towardes his friendes in peace, made him to be greatly feared and loved of all men. this pan- dosto had to wife a ladie called bellaria, by birth royall, the historie of [winter's learned by education, faire by nature, by vertues famous, so that it was hard to judge whether her beautie, fortune, or vertue wanne the greatest commendations. these two, lincked together in perfect love, led their lives with such fortunate content that their subjects greatly rejoyced to see their quiet disposition. they had not beene married long, but fortune (willing to increase their happines) lent them a sonne, so adorned with the gifts of nature, as the perfection of the childe greatly augmented the love of the parentes, and the joy of their commons; in so much that the bohemians, to shewe their inward joyes by outwarde actions, made bonefires and triumphs throughout all the kingdome, appointing justes and turneyes for the honour of their young prince : whether resorted not only his nobles, but also divers kings and princes which were his neighbours, willing to shewe their friendship they ought to pandosto, and to win fame and glory by their prowesse and valour. pandosto, whose minde was fraught with princely liberality, entertayned the kings, princes, and noble men with such submisse curtesie and magnifical bounty, that they all sawe how willing he was to gratifie their good wils, making a generall feast for subjects, which continued by the space of twentie dayes; all which time the justes and turneys were kept to the great content both of the lordes and ladies there present. this solemne tryumph being once ended, the assembly, taking their leave of pandosto and bel- laria, the young sonne (who was called garinter) was nursed up in the house to the great joy and content of the parents. fortune envious of such happy successe, willing to shewe some signe of her inconstancie, turned her wheele, and dark- ned their bright sunne of prosperitie with the mistie cloudes of mishap and misery. for it so happened that egistus, king of sycilia, who in his youth had bene brought up with pandosto, desirous to shewe that neither tracte of time, nor distance of place could diminish their former friendship, pro- vided a navie of ships and sayled into bohemia to visite his old friend and companion; who hearing of his arrivall, went tale.] dorastus and fawnia. himselfe in person, and his wife bellaria accompanied with a great traine of lords and ladies, to meete egistus; and espying him, alighted from his horse, embraced him very lovingly, protesting that nothing in the world could have happened more acceptable to him then his comming, wishing his wife to welcome his olde friend and acquaintance: who (to shewe how she liked him whom her husband loved) inter- tayned him with such familiar curtesie as egistus perceived himselfe to bee verie well welcome. after they had thus saluted and embraced eche other, they mounted againe on horsbacke and rode toward the citie, devising and recount- ing howe being children they had passed their youth in friendely pastimes: where by the meanes of the citizens egistus was receyved with triumphs and shewes, in such sort that he marvelled how on so small a warning they coulde make such preparation. passing the streetes thus with such rare sightes they rode on to the pallace, where pandosto entertained egistus and his sycilians with such banqueting and sumptuous cheare, so royally as they all had cause to commend his princely liberality; yea, the verie basest slave that was knowne to come from sycilia was used with such curtesie, that egistus might easily perceive how both he and his were honored for his friendes sake. bellaria (who in her time was the flower of curtesie), willing to shew how unfaynedly shee looved her husband by his friends intertainement, used him likewise so familiarly that her countenance bewraied how her minde was affected towardes him, oftentimes comming her selfe into his bed chamber to see that nothing should be amis to mislike him. this honest familiarity increased dayly more and more betwixt them; for bellaria, noting in egistus a princely and bountifull minde, adorned with sundrie and excellent qualities, and egistus, finding in her a vertuous and curteous disposition, there grew such a secret uniting of their affections, that the one could not well be without the company of the other : in so much, that when pandosto was tale.] dorastus and fawnia. meane time pandostoes minde was so farre charged with jea- lousy, that he did no longer doubt, but was assured, (as he thought) that his friend egistus had entered a wrong pointe in his tables, and so had played him false play : whereupon, desirous to revenge so great an injury, he thought best to dissemble the grudge with a faire and friendly countenance, and so under the shape of a friend to shew him the tricke of a foe. devising with himself a long time how he might best put away egistus without suspition of treacherous mur- der, hee concluded at last to poyson him; which opinion pleasing his humour he became resolute in his determination, and the better to bring the matter to passe he called unto him his cupbearer, with whom in secret he brake the matter, promising to him for the performance thereof to geve him a thousande crownes of yearely revenues. his cupbearer, eyther being of a good conscience or will- ing for fashion sake to deny such a bloudy request, began with great reasons to perswade pandosto from his deter- minate mischief, shewing him what an offence murther was to the gods; how such unnaturall actions did more displease the heavens than men, and that causelesse cruelty did sel- dome or never escape without revenge : he layd before his face that egistus was his friend, a king, and one that was come into his kingdome to confirme a league of perpetuall amitie betwixt them; that he had and did shew him a most friendly countenance; how egistus was not onely honoured of his owne people by obedience, but also loved of the bohe- inians for his curtesie, and that if he now should without any just or manifest cause poyson him, it would not onely be a great dishonour to his majestie, and a meanes to sow perpetuall enmity between the sycilians and the bohemians, but also his owne subjects would repine at such treacherous cruelty. these and such like perswasions of franion (for so was his cupbearer called) could no whit prevaile to dis- swade him from his divellish enterprize, but remaining reso- lute in his determination (his fury so fired with rage as it the historie of [winter's could not be appeased with reason), he began with bitter taunts to take up his man, and to lay before him two baites, preferment and death; saying that if he would poyson egis- tus, he would advance him to high dignities; if he refused to doe it of an obstinate minde, no torture should be too great to requite his disobedience. franion, seeing that to perswade pandosto any more was but to strive against the streame, consented as soone as an opportunity would give him leave to dispatch egistus: wherewith pandosto re- mained somewhat satisfied, hoping now he should be fully revenged of such mistrusted injuries, intending also as soon as egistus was dead to give his wife a sop of the same sawce, and so be rid of those which were the cause of his restles sorrow. while thus he lived in this hope, franion being secret in his chamber began to meditate with himselfe in these termes. ah, franion, treason is loved of many, but the traitor hated of all: unjust offences may for a time escape without danger, but never without revenge. thou art servant to a king and must obey at command; yet, franion, against law and con- science it is not good to resist a tyrant with armes, nor to please an unjust king with obedience. what shalt thou doe? folly refused gold, and frenzie preferment: wisdome seeketh after dignity, and counsell keepeth for gaine. egis- tus is a stranger to thee, and pandosto thy soveraigne: thou has little cause to respect the one, and oughtest to have great care to obey the other. thinke this, franion, that a pound of gold is worth a tunne of lead; great gifts are little gods; and preferment to a meane man is a whetstone to courage: there is nothing sweeter then promotion, nor lighter then report. care not then though most count thee a traitor, so all call thee rich. dignity (franion) advaunceth thy posteritie, and evill report can but hurt thy selfe. know this, where eagles builde falcons may prey; where lyons haunt, foxes may steale. kings are knowne to commaund, servants are blame- lesse to consent: feare not thou then to lift at egistus; pan- tale.] dorastus and fawnia. dosto shall beare the burthen. yea but, franion, conscience is a worme that ever biteth, but never ceaseth : that which is rubbed with the stone galactites will never be hot. flesh dipped in the sea aegeum will never bee sweete: the hearbe trigion beeing once bit with an aspis never groweth, and conscience, once stained with innocent blood, is alwaies tyed to a guiltie remorse. prefer thy content before riches, and a cleare minde before dignity; so beeing poore thou shalt have rich peace, or else rich, thou shalt enjoy disquiet. franion having muttered out these or such like words, seeing either he must die with a cleare minde, or live with a spotted conscience, he was so cumbred with divers cogita- tions that hee could take no rest, untill at last he deter- mined to breake the matter to egistus; but fearing that the king should eyther suspect or heare of such matters, he con- cealed the device till opportunitie would permit him to re- veale it. lingring thus in doubtfull feare, in an evening he went to egistus lodging, and desirous to breake with him of certaine affaires that touched the king, after all were com- maunded out of the chamber, franion made manifest the whole conspiracie which pandosto had devised against him, desiring egistus not to account him a traytor for bewraying his maisters counsaile, but to thinke that he did it for con- science: hoping that although his maister, inflamed with rage or incensed by some sinister reportes or slanderous speeches, had imagined such causelesse mischiefe, yet when time should pacifie his anger, and try those talebearers but flat- tering parasites, then he would count him as a faithfull ser- uant that with such care had kept his maisters credite. egis- tus had not fully heard franion tell forth his tale, but a quak- ing feare possessed all his limmes, thinking that there was some treason wrought, and that franion did but shaddow his craft with these false colours: wherefore he began to waxe in choller, and saide that he doubted not pandosto, sith he was his friend, and there had never as yet beene any breach of amity. he had not sought to invade his lands, to conspire with his enemies, to disswade his subjects from their allege- - the historie of [[pinter's ance; but in word and thought he rested his at all times: he knew not therefore any cause that should moove pan- dosto to seeke his death, but suspected it to be a compacted knavery of the bohemians to bring the king and him to oddes. franion staying him the middst of his talke, told him that to dally with princes was with the swannes to sing against their death, and that if the bohemians had intended any such mischiefe, it might have beene better brought to passe then by revealing the conspiracie : therefore his ma- jestie did ill to misconstrue of his good meaning, sith his intent was to hinder treason, not to become a traytor; and to confirme his promises, if it pleased his majestie to fly into sicilia for the safegarde of his life, hee would goe with him, and if then he found not such a practise to be pretended, let his imagined treacherie be repayed with most monstrous tor- ments. egistus, hearing the solemne protestation of franion, beganne to consider that in love and kingdomes neither faith nor lawe is to bee respected, doubting that pandosto thought by his death to destroy his men, and with speedy warre to invade sycilia. these and such doubtes throughly weyghed he gave great thankes to franion, promising if hee might with life returne to syracusa, that he would create him a duke in sycilia, craving his counsell how hee might es- cape out of the countrie. franion, who having some small skill in navigation was well acquainted with the ports and havens, and knew every daunger in the sea, joyning in coun- sell with the maister of egistus navie, rigged all their ships, and setting them a flote, let them lie at anchor to be in the more readines when time and winde should serve. fortune, although blind, yet by chaunce favouring this just cause, sent them within six dayes a good gale of winde ; which franion seeing fit for their purpose, to put pandosto out of suspition, the night before they should sayle he went to him, and promised that the next day he would put the device in practice, for he had got such a forcible poyson, as the very smell thereof wold procure suddain death. pan- tale.] dorastus and faw nia. : dosto was joyfull to heare this good newes, and thought every houre a day till he might be glutted with bloudy revenge; but his suit had but ill successe. for egistus, fearing that delay might breede danger, and willing that the grasse should not be cut from under his feete, taking bagge and baggage, by the helpe of franion conveied himselfe and his men out at a posterne gate of the cittie, so secretly and speedily that without any suspition they got to the sea shoare; where with many a bitter curse taking their leave of bohemia, they went aboord. weighing their anchors and hoisting sayle, they passed as fast as wind and sea would permit towards sycilia, egistus being a joyfull man that he had safely past such treacherous perils. but as they were quietly floating on the sea, so pandosto and his cittizens were in an oproare; for seeing that the sycilians without taking their leave were fled away by night, the bohemians feared some treason, and the king thought that without question his suspition was true, seeing the cup-bearer had bewrayed the sum of his secret pretence. whereupon he began to imagine that franion and his wife bellaria had conspired with egistus, and that the fervent affection shee bare him was the onely meanes of his secret departure; in so much that incensed with rage he commaundes that his wife should be carried straight to prison untill they heard further of his pleasure. the guarde, un- willing to lay their hands one such a vertuous princesse and yet fearing the kings fury, went very sorrowfull to fulfill their charge. comming to the queenes lodging they found her playing with her yong sonne garinter, unto whom with teares doing the message, bellaria, astonished at such a hard cen- sure and finding her cleere conscience a sure advocate to pleade in her cause, went to the prison most willingly, where with sighes and teares shee past away the time till she might come to her triall. but pandosto, whose reason was suppressed with rage and whose unbridled follie was incensed with fury, seeing franion had bewrayed his secrets, and that egistus might well be rayled on, but not revenged, determined to wreake the historie of [winter's all his wrath on poore bellaria. he therefore caused a generall proclamation to be made through all his realme that the queene and egistus had, by the helpe of franion, not onely committed most incestuous adultery, but also had conspired the kings death; whereupon the traitor franion was fled away with egistus, and bellaria was most justly imprisoned. this proclamation being once blazed through the country, although the vertuous disposition of the queene did halfe discredit the contents, yet the suddaine and speedy passage of egistus, and the secret departure of franion, in- duced them (the circumstances throughly considered) to thinke that both the proclamation was true, and the king greatly injured: yet they pittyed her case, as sorrowful that so good a lady should be crossed with such adverse fortune. but the king, whose restlesse rage would remit no pitty, thought that although he might sufficiently requite his wives falshood with the bitter plague of pinching penury, yet his minde should never be glutted with revenge till he might have fit time and opportunity to repay the trechery of egistus with a totall in- jury. but a curst cow hath oftentimes short hornes, and a willing minde but a weake arme; for pandosto, although he felt that revenge was a spurre to warre, and that envy alwaies proffereth steele, yet he saw that egistus was not onely of great puissance and prowesse to withstand him, but had also many kings of his alliance to ayde him, if neede should serve, for he married the emperours daughter of russia. these and the like considerations something daunted pandosto his courage, so that he was content rather to put up a manifest injurie with peace, then hunt after revenge, dis- honor and losse; determining, since egistus had escaped scot-free, that bellaria should pay for all at an unreasonable price. remayning thus resolute in his determination, bellaria continuing still in prison and hearing the contents of the proclamation, knowing that her minde was never touched with such affection, nor that egistus had ever offered her such discurtesie, would gladly have come to her answere, that both tale.] dorastus and faw nia. shee might have knowne her just accusers, and cleared her selfe of that guiltlesse crime. but pandosto was so inflamed with rage and infected with jelousie, as he would not vouchsafe to heare her, nor admit any just excuse; so that shee was faine to make a vertue of her neede and with patience to beare those heavie injuries. as thus shee lay crossed with calamities (a great cause to in- crease her griefe) she founde her selfe quicke with childe, which as soone as she felt stirre in her body she burst forth into bitter teares, exclayming against fortune in these termes. alas, bellaria, how infortunate art thou, because fortunate better thou hadst beene borne a beggar then a prince, so shouldest thou have bridled fortune with want, where now shee sporteth her selfe with thy plentie. ah happy life, where poore thoughts and meane desires live in secure con- tent, not fearing fortune because too low for fortune. thou seest now, bellaria, that care is a companion to honor, not to povertie; that high cedars are crushed with tempests, when low shrubs are not touched with the winde; pretious diamonds are cut with the file, when despised pibbles lye safe in the sand. delphos is sought to by princes, not beggers, and for- tunes altars smoke with kings presents, not with poore mens gifts. happie are such, bellaria, that curse fortune for con- tempt, not feare, and may wish they were, not sorrow they have beene. thou art a princesse, bellaria, and yet a pri- soner; borne to the one by descent, assigned to the other by dispite; accused without cause, and therefore oughtest to dye without care, for patience is a shield against fortune, and a guiltlesse minde yeeldeth not to sorrow. ah, but infamy galleth unto death, and liveth after death: report is plumed with times feathers, and envie oftentimes soundeth fames trumpet: the suspected adultery shall fly in the ayre, and thy knowne vertues shall lye hid in the earth; one moale staineth the whole face, and what is once spotted with infamy can hardly be worne out with time. die then, bellaria, bellaria die; for if the gods should say thou art guiltlesse, yet envie the historie of [ winter's would heare the gods, but never beleeve the gods. ah, haplesse wretch, cease these tearmes: desperate thoughts are fit for them that feare shame, not for such as hope for credite. pandosto hath darkened thy fame, but shall never discredite thy vertues. suspition may enter a false action, but proofe shall never put in his plea: care not then for envie, sith re- port hath a blister on her tongue, and let sorrow baite them which offend, not touch thee that art faultlesse. but alas, poor soule, how canst thou but sorrow ! thou art with childe, and by him that in steed of kinde pittie pincheth thee in cold prison. and with that, such gasping sighes so stopping her breath that shee could not utter more words, but wringing her hands, and gushing forth streames of teares, shee passed away the time with bitter complaints. the jaylor, pitying those her heavie passions, thinking that if the king knew she were with childe he would somewhat appease his fury and re- lease her from prison, went in al hast and certified pandosto what the effect of bellarias complaint was ; who no sooner heard the jaylor say she was with childe, but as one pos- sessed with a phrenzie he rose up in a rage, swearing that shee and the basterd brat she was [big] withall should die if the gods themselves said no; thinking that surely by computation of time that egistus and not he was the father to the childe. this suspitious thought galled a fresh this halfe healed sore, in so much as he could take no rest untill he might mittigate his choller with a just revenge, which happened presently after. for bellaria was brought to bed of a faire and beautifull daughter, which no sooner pandosto hearde, but he determined that both bellaria and the young infant should be burnt with fire. his nobles hearing of the kings cruell sentence sought by perswasions to divert him from his bloodie determination, laying before his face innocencie of the childe, and vertuous disposition how she had continually loved and honour derly that without due proofe he coul tale.] dorastus and fawnia. to appeach her of that crime. and if she had faulted, yet it were more honourable to pardon with mercy then to punish with extremity, and more kingly to be commended of pitty than accused of rigour: and as for the childe, if he should punish it for the mothers offence, it were to strive against nature and justice; and that unnatural actions doe more offend the gods then men; how causelesse cruelty, nor innocent blood never scapes without revenge. these and such like reasons could not appease his rage, but he rested resolute in this, that bellaria being an adultresse the childe was a bastard, and he would not suffer that such an infamous brat should call him father. yet at last (seeing his noble men were importunate upon him) he was content to spare the childes life, and yet to put it to a worse death. for he found out this devise, that seeing (as he thought) it came by fortune, so he would commit it to the charge of fortune, and therefore caused a little cock-boat to be provided, wherein he meant to put the babe, and then send it to the mercies of the seas and the destenies. from this his peeres in no wise could per- swade him, but that he sent presently two of his guard to fetch the childe: who being come to the prison, and with weeping teares recounting their maisters message, bellaria no sooner heard the rigorious resolution of her mercilesse husband, but she fell downe in a swound, so that all thought she had bin dead : yet at last being come to her selfe, shee cryed and screeched out in this wise. alas, sweete infortunate babe, scarce borne, before envied by fortune! would the day of thy birth had beene the terme of thy life; then shouldest thou have made an ende to care and prevented thy fathers rigour. thy faults cannot yet de- serve such hatefull revenge; thy dayes are too short for so sharpe a doome, but thy untimely death must pay thy mothers debts, and her guiltlesse crime must bee thy gastly curse. and shalt thou, sweete babe, be committed to fortune, when thou art already spited by fortune? shall the seas be thy har- bour and the hard boate thy cradle? shall thy tender mouth, b the historie of [winter's in steede of sweete kisses, be nipped with bitter stormes : shalt thou have the whistling windes for thy lullabie, and the salt sea fome in steede of sweete milke alas, what des- tinies would assigne such hard hap! what father would be so cruell, or what gods will not revenge such rigor? let me kisse thy lippes (sweete infant) and wet thy tender cheekes with my teares, and put this chayne about thy little necke, that if fortune save thee, it may helpe to succour thee. this, since thou must goe to surge in the gastfull seas, with a sorrowfull kisse i bid thee farewell, and i pray the gods thou maist fare well. such, and so great was her griefe, that her vitall spirits being suppressed with sorrow, she fell againe downe into a trance, having her sences so sotted with care that after shee was revived yet shee lost her memorie, and lay for a great time without moving, as one in a trance. the guard left her in this perplexitie, and carried the child to the king, who quite devoide of pity commanded that without delay it should bee put in the boat, having neither saile nor other to guid it, and so to be carried into the midst of the sea, and there left to the wind and wave as the destinies please to appoint. the very ship-men, seeing the sweete countenance of the yong babe, began to accuse the king of rigor, and to pity the childs hard fortune; but feare constrayned them to that which their nature did abhorre, so that they placed it in one of the ends of the boat, and with a few greene bows made a homely cabben to shrowd it as they could from wind and weather. having thus trimmed the boat they tied it to a ship and so haled it into the mayne sea, and then cut in sunder the coarde; which they had no sooner done, but there arose a mighty tempest, which tossed the little boate so vehemently in the waves that the shipmen thought it could not continue long without sincking; yea, the storme grewe so great, that with much labour and perill they got to the shoare. but leaving the childe to her fortunes, againe to pandosto, who not yet glutted with sufficient revenge devised which way tale.] dorastus and fawnia. he should best increase his wives calamitie. but first assem- bling his nobles and counsellors, hee called her for the more reproch into open court, where it was objected against her that she had committed adulterie with egistus, and conspired with franion to poyson pandosto her husband, but their pre- tence being partely spyed, she counselled them to flie away by night for their better safety. bellaria, who standing like a prisoner at the barre, feeling in her selfe a cleare conscience to withstand her false accusers, seeing that no lesse than death could pacifie her husbands wrath, waxed bolde and desired that she might have lawe and justice, for mercy shee neyther craved nor hoped for; and that those perjured wretches which had falsely accused her to the king might be brought before her face to give in evidence. but pandosto, whose rage and jealousie was such as no reason nor equitie could appease, tolde her, that for her accusers they were of such credite as their wordes were sufficient witnesse, and that the sodaine and secret flight of egistus and franion con- firmed that which they had confessed; and as for her, it was her parte to deny such a monstrous crime, and to be impu- dent in forswearing the fact, since shee had past all shame in committing the fault: but her stale countenaunce should stand for no coyne, for as the bastard which she bare was served, so she should with some cruell death be requited. bellaria, no whit dismayed with this rough reply, tolde her husband pandosto that he spake upon choller and not con- science, for her vertuous life had beene ever such as no spot of suspicion could ever staine. and if she had borne a frendly countenaunce to egistus, it was in respect he was his friende, and not for any lusting affection; therefore, if she were condemned without any further proofe it was rigour and not law. the noble men which sate in judgement said that bellaria spake reason, and intreated the king that the accusers might be openly examined and sworne, and if then the evidence were such as the jury might finde her guilty, (for seeing b the historie of [winter's she was a prince she ought to be tryed by her peeres) then let her have such punishment as the extremitie of the law will assigne to such malefactors. the king presently made answere that in this case he might and would dispence with the law, and that the jury being once panneld they should take his word for sufficient evidence, otherwise he would make the proudest of them repent it. the noble men seeing the king in choler were all whist; but bellaria, whose life then hung in the ballaunce, fearing more perpe- tuall infamie then momentarie death, tolde the king if his furie might stand for a law that it were vaine to have the jury yeeld their verdict; and therefore she fell downe upon her knees, and desired the king that for the love he bare to his young sonne garinter, whome she brought into the world, that hee woulde graunt her a request; which was this, that it would please his majestie to send sixe of his noble men whome he best trusted to the isle of delphos, there to en- quire of the oracle of apollo whether she had committed adultery with egistus, or conspired to poyson him with fra- nion? and if the god apollo, who by his devine essence knew al secrets, gave answere that she was guiltie, she were con- tent to suffer any torment were it never so terrible. the request was so reasonable that pandosto could not for shame deny it, unlesse he would bee counted of all his subjects more wilfull than wise: he therefore agreed that with as much speede as might be there should be certaine embassadores dispatched to the ile of delphos, and in the meane season he commanded that his wife should be kept in close prison. bellaria having obtained this graunt was now more carefull for her little babe that floated on the seas then sorrowful for her owne mishap, for of that she doubted: of her selfe shee was assured, knowing if apollo should give oracle according to the thoughts of the hart, yet the sentence should goe on her side, such was the clearenes of her minde in this case. but pandosto (whose suspitious head still remained in one song) chose out six of his nobility whom hee knew were scarse tale.] dorastus and fawnia. indifferent men in the queenes behalfe, and providing all things fit for their journey sent them to delphos: they willing to fulfill the kinges commaund, and desirous to see the situation and custome of the iland, dispatched their affaires with as much speede as might be, and embarked themselves to this voyage, which (the wind and weather serving fit for their purpose) was soone ended. for within three weekes they arrived at delphos, where they were no sooner set on lande but with great devotion they went to the temple of apollo, and there offring sacrifice to the god and giftes to the priest, as the custome was, they humbly craved an aunswere of their demaund. they had not long kneeled at the altar, but apollo with a loude voice saide: bohemians, what you finde behinde the altar take and depart. they forthwith obeying the oracle founde a scroule of parchment, wherein was written these words in letters of golde,- the oracle. su pition is no proofe: jealousie is an unequall judge: bellaria is chast; egistus blamelesse : franion a true subject; pan- dosto treacherous : his babe innocent, and the king shall live without an heire, if that which is lost be not founde. as soone as they had taken out this scroule the priest of the god commaunded them that they should not presume to read it before they came in the presence of pandosto, unlesse they would incurre the displeasure of apollo. the bohe- mian lords carefully obeying his commaund, taking their leave of the priest with great reverence, departed out of the temple, and went to their ships, and as soon as wind would permit them sailed toward bohemia, whither in short time they safely arrived; and with great tryumph issuing out of their ships went to the kinges pallace, whom they found in his chamber accompanied with other noble men. pandosto no sooner saw them but with a merrie countenaunce he wel- comed them home, asking what newes? they told his ma- the historie of [winter's jestie that they had received an aunswere of the god written in a scroule, but with this charge, that they should not reade the contents before they came in the presence of the king, and with that they delivered him the parchment: but his noble men entreated him that, sith therein was contayned either the safetie of his wives life and honesty or her death and perpetuall infamy, that he would have his nobles and commons assembled in the judgment hall, where the queene, brought in as prysoner, should heare the contents. if shee were found guilty by the oracle of the god, then all should have cause to thinke his rigour proceeded of due desert: if her grace were found faultlesse, then shee should bee cleared before all, sith she had been accused openly. this pleased the king so, that he appointed the day, and assembled al his lords and commons, and caused the queene to be brought in before the judgemente seate, commaunding that the indite- ment shoulde bee read wherein she was accused of adultery with egistus and of conspiracy with franion. bellaria hear- ing the contentes was no whit astonished, but made this chearefull aunswer:— if the devine powers bee privy to humane actions (as no doubt they are) i hope my patience shall make fortune blushe, and my unspotted life shall staine spightful discredit. for although lying report hath sought to appeach mine honor, and suspition hath intended to soyle my credit with infamie, yet where vertue keepeth the forte, report and suspition may assayle, but never sack: how i have led my life before egis- tus comming, i appeale, pandosto, to the gods and to thy con- science. what hath passed betwixt him and me, the gods onely know, and i hope will presently reveale: that i loved egistus i can not denie; that i honored him i shame not to confesse: to the one i was forced by his vertues, to the other for his dignities. but as touching lascivious lust, i say egis- tus is honest, and hope my selfe to be found without spot: for franion, i can neither accuse him nor excuse him, for i was tale.] dorastus and fawnia, not privie to his departure; and that this is true which i have heere rehearsed i referre myself to the devine oracle. bellaria had no sooner sayd but the king commaunded that one of his dukes should reade the contentes of the scroule, which after the commons had heard they gave a great showt rejoysing and clapping their hands that the queene was cleare of that false accusation. but the king, whose conscience was a witnesse against him of his witlesse furie and false sus- pected jealousie, was so ashamed of his rashe folly that he entreated his nobles to perswade bellaria to forgive and for- get these injuries; promising not onely to shew himselfe a loyall and loving husband, but also to reconcile himselfe to egistus and franion; revealing then before them all the cause of their secrete flighte, and how treacherously hee thought to have practised his death, if the good minde of his cupbearer had not prevented his purpose. as thus he was relating the whole matter, there was worde brought him that his young sonne garinter was sodainly dead, which newes so soone as bellaria heard, surcharged before with ex- treame joy and now suppressed with heavie sorrowe, her vitall spirites were so stopped that she fell downe presently dead, and could never be revived. this sodaine sight so appalled the kingessences, that he sanck from his seate in a sound, so as he was fayne to be carried by his nobles to his pallace, where hee lay by the space of three dayes without speache. his commons were, as men in dispaire, diversly distressed: there was nothing but mourning and lamentation to be heard throughout al bohemia: their young prince dead, their vertuous queene bereaved of her life, and their king and soveraigne in great hazard. this tragicall discourse of fortune so daunted them, as they went like shadowes, not men; yet somewhat to comfort their heavie hearts, they heard that pandosto was come to himselfe, and had recovered his speache, who as in a fury brayed out these bitter speaches: o miserable pandosto! what surer witnesse then conscience the historie of [winter's what thoughts more sower then suspition? what plague more bad then jealousie! unnaturall actions offend the gods more than men, and causelesse crueltie never scapes without re- venge. i have committed such a bloudy fact, as repent i may, but recall i cannot. ah, jealousie! a hell to the minde, and a horror to the conscience, suppressing reason, and inciting rage; a worse passion than phrensie, a greater plague than mad- nesse. are the gods just then let them revenge such brutishe crueltie. my innocent babe i have drowned in the seas; my loving wife i have slaine with slaunderous suspi- tion; my trusty friend i have sought to betray, and yet the gods are slack to plague such offences. ah, unjust apollo' pandosto is the man that hath committed the faulte, why should garinter, seely childe, abide the paine ! well, sith the gods meane to prolong my dayes to increase my dolour, i will offer my guiltie bloud a sacrifice to those sackles soules whose lives are lost by my rigorous folly. and with that he reached at a rapier to have murdered himselfe, but his peeres being present stayed him from such a bloudy acte, perswading him to think that the common- wealth consisted on his safetie, and that those sheepe could not but perish that wanted a sheepheard; wishing that if hee would not live for himselfe, yet he should have care of his sub- jects, and to put such fancies out of his minde, sith in sores past help salves doe not heale but hurt, and in thinges past cure, care is a corrosive. with these and such like per- swasions the kinge was overcome, and began somewhat to quiet his minde; so that as soone as he could goe abroad hee caused his wife to bee embalmed, and wrapt in lead with her young sonne garinter; erecting a rich and famous sepul- chre wherein hee intombed them both, making such solemme obsequies at her funeral as al bohemia might perceive he did greatly repent him of his forepassed folly; causing this epi- taph to be ingraven on her tombe in letters of golde — tale.] dorastus and faw nia. t the epitaph. here lyes entombde bellaria faire, falsly accu sed to be un chaste : cleared by apollos sacred doome, yet slaine by jealo usie at last. what ere thou be that pass est by, cursse him that causde this queene to die. this epitaph being ingraven, pandosto would once a day repaire to the tombe, and there with watry plaintes bewaile his misfortune, coveting no other companion but sorrowe, nor no other harmonie but repentance. but leaving him to his dolorous passions, at last let us come to shewe the tragicall discourse of the young infant. who beeing tossed with winde and wave floated two whole daies without succour, readie at every puffe to bee drowned in the sea, till at last the tempest ceassed and the little boate was driven with the tyde into the coast of sycilia, where sticking uppon the sandes it rested. fortune minding to be wanton, willing to shewe that as she hath wrinckles on her browes so shee hath dimples in her cheekes, thought after so many sower lookes to lend a fayned smile, and after a puffing storme to bring a pretty calme, shee began thus to dally. it fortuned a poore mercenary sheepheard that dwelled in sycilia, who got his living by other mens flockes, missed one of his sheepe, and thinking it had strayed into the co- vert that was hard by, sought very diligently to find that which he could not see, fearing either that the wolves or eagles had undone him (for he was so poore as a sheepe was halfe his substaunce), wandered downe toward the sea cliffes to see if perchaunce the sheepe was browsing on the sea ivy, whereon they greatly doe feede; but not finding her there, as he was ready to returne to his flocke hee heard a child crie, but knowing there was no house nere, he thought he had mistaken the sound and that it was the bleatyng of his sheepe. wherefore looking more narrowely, as he cast his eye to the sea he spyed a little boate, from whence, as he the historie of [winter's attentively listened, he might heare the cry to come. stand- ing a good while in a maze, at last he went to the shoare, and wading to the boate, as he looked in he saw the little babe lying al alone ready to die for hunger and colde, wrap- ped in a mantle of scarlet richely imbrodered with golde, and having a chayne about the necke. the sheepeheard, who before had never seene so faire a babe nor so riche jewels, thought assuredly that it was some little god, and began with great devocion to knock on his breast. the babe, who wrythed with the head to seeke for the pap, began againe to cry a fresh, whereby the poore man knew that it was a childe, which by some sinister meanes was driven thither by distresse of weather; marvailing how such a seely infant, which by the mantle and the chayne could not be but borne of noble parentage, should be so hardly crossed with deadly mishap. the poore sheepheard, perplex- ed thus with divers thoughts, tooke pitty of the childe, and determined with himselfe to carry it to the king, that there it might be brought up according to the worthinesse of.birth, for his ability could not afforde to foster it, though his good minde was willing to further it. taking therefore the chylde in his armes, as he foulded the mantle together the better to defende it from colde there fell downe at his foote a very faire and riche purse, wherein he founde a great summe of golde; which sight so revived the shepheard's spirits, as he was greatly ravished with joy and daunted with feare; joyful to see such a summe in his power, and feareful if it should be knowne that it might breede his further daunger. neces- sitie wisht him at the least to retaine the golde, though he would not keepe the childe: the simplicity of his conscience scared him from such deceiptfull briberie. thus was the poore manne perplexed with a doubtfull dilemma untill at last the covetousnesse of the coyne overcame him; for what will not the greedy desire of golde cause a man to doe! so that he was resolved in himselfe to foster the childe, and with the summe to relieve his want. resting thus resolute in this tale.] dorastus and fawnia. point he left seeking of his sheepe, and as covertly and secretly as he coulde, went by a by way to his house, least any of his neighbours should perceave his carriage. as soone as he was got home, entring in at the doore, the childe began to crie, which his wife hearing, and seeing her husband with a yong babe in his armes, began to bee somewhat jealousse, yet marveiling that her husband should be so wanton abroad sith he was so quiet at home: but as women are naturally given to beleeve the worste, so his wife, thinking it was some bastard, beganne to crow against her goodman, and taking up a cudgel (for the most maister went breechles) sware solemnly that she would make clubs trumps if hee brought any bastard brat within her dores. the goodman, seeing his wife in her majestie with her mace in her hand, thought it was time to bowe for feare of blowes, and desired her to be quiet, for there was non such matter; but if she could holde her peace they were made for ever: and with that he told her the whole matter, how he had found the child in a little boat, without any succour, wrapped in that costly mantle, and having that rich chaine about the neck. but at last, when he shewed her the purse full of gold, she began to simper something sweetely, and, taking her husband about the neck kissed him after her homely fashion, saying that she hoped god had seene their want and now ment to relieeve their poverty, and seeing they could get no chil- dren, had sent them this little babe to be their heire. take heed in any case, (quoth the shepherd) that you be secret, and blabbe it not out when you meete with your gossippes, for if you doe, we are like not only to loose the golde and jewels, but our other goodes and lives. tush (quoth his wife), profit is a good hatch before the doore: feare not, i have other thinges to talke of than this; but i pray you let us lay up the money surely, and the jewels, least by any mishap it be spied. after that they had set all things in order the shepheard went to his sheepe with a merry note, and the good wife learned to sing lullaby at home with her yong babe, wrap- the historie of [winter's ping it in a homely blanket in sted of a rich mantle; nourishing it so clenly and carefully as it began to bee a jolly girle, in so much that they began both of them to be very fond of it, seeing as it waxed in age so it increased in beauty. the shepheard every night at his comming home would sing and daunce it on his knee and prattle, that in a short time it began to speake, and call him dad, and her mam: at last when it grew to ripe yeeres that it was about seven yeares olde, the shepheard left keeping of other mens sheepe, and with the money he found in the purse he bought him the lease of a pretty farme, and got a smal flocke of sheepe, which when fawnia (for so they named the child) came to the age of ten yeres hee set her to keepe, and shee with such diligence performed her charge as the sheepe prospered marveilously under her hand. fawnia thought porrus had ben her father, and mopsa her mother, (for so was the shep- heard and his wife called) honoured and obeyed them with such reverence that all the neighbours praised the duetifull obedience of the child. porrus grewe in a short time to bee a man of some wealth and credite, for fortune so favoured him in having no charge but fawnia, that he began to pur- chase land, intending after his death to give it to his daughter, so that divers rich farmers sonnes came as wooers to his house. for fawnia was something clenly attired, being of such singular beautie and excellent witte, that whoso saw her would have thought shee had bene some heavenly nymph and not a mortal creature, in so much that when she came to the age of sixteene yeeres shee so increased with exquisite perfection both of body and minde, as her natural disposition did bewray that she was borne of some high parentage; but the people thinking she was daughter to the shephard porrus rested only amazed at her beauty and wit; yea, she won such favour and commendations in every mans eye, as her beautie was not onely praysed in the countrey, but also spoken of in the court; yet such was her submisse modestie, that although her praise daily increased, her minde was no whit puffed up with pride, but humbled her selfe as became tale.] dorastus and fawnia. a country mayde and the daughter of a poore sheepheard. every day she went forth with her sheepe to the field, keep- ing them with such care and diligence as al men thought she was verie painfull, defending her face from the heat of the sunne with no other vale but with a garland made of bowes and flowers, which attire became her so gallantly as shee seemed to bee the goddesse flora her selfe for beauty. fortune, who al this while had shewed a frendly face, began now to turne her back and to shew a lowring countenaunce, intending as she had given fawnia a slender checke, so she would give her a harder mate; to bring which to passe, she layd her traine on this wise. egistus had but one only son, called dorastus, about the age of twenty yeeres; a prince so decked and adorned with the gifts of nature, so fraught with beauty and vertuous qualities, as not onely his father joyed to have so good a sonne, and al his commons rejoyced that god had lent them such a noble prince to succeede in the kingdom. egistus placing al his joy in the perfection of his sonne, seeing that hee was now marriageable, sent embassadors to the king of denmarke to intreate a mariage betweene him and his daughter, who willingly consenting made answer that the next spring, if it please egistus with his sonne to come into denmarke, hee doubted not but they should agree upon reasonable conditions. egistus resting satisfied with this friendly answer thought convenient in the meane time to breake with his sonne: finding therefore on a day fit opportunity, he spake to him in these fatherly tearmes:— dorastus, thy youth warneth me to prevent the worst, and mine age to provide the best. oportunities neglected are signes of folly: actions measured by time are seldome bitten with repentance. thou art young, and i olde; age hath taught me that which thy youth cannot yet conceive. i therefore will counsell thee as a father, hoping thou wilt obey as a childe. thou seest my white hayres are blossomes for the grave, and thy freshe colour fruite for time and fortune, so that it behooveth me to thinke how to dye, and for thee to the historie of [winter's care how to live. my crowne i must leave by death, and thou enjoy my kingdome by succession, wherein i hope thy vertue and prowesse shall bee such, as though my subjectes want my person, yet they shall see in thee my perfection. that nothing either may faile to satisfie thy minde, or increase thy dignities, the onely care i have is to see thee well marryed before i die and thou become olde. dorastus, who from his infancy delighted rather to die with mars in the fielde then to dally with venus in the chamber, fearing to displease his father, and yet not willing to be wed, made him this reuerent answere. sir, there is no greater bond then duetie, nor no straiter law then nature: disobedience in youth is often galled with despight in age. the commaund of the father ought to be a constraint to the childe: so parentes willes are laws, so they passe not all laws. may it please your grace therefore to appoint whome i shall love, rather then by deniall i should be appeached of disobedience. i rest content to love, though it bee the only thing i hate. egistus hearing his sonne to flie so farre from the marke began to be somewhat chollericke, and therefore made him this hastie aunswere. * what, dorastus, canst thou not love? commeth this cynicall passion of prone desires or peevish frowardnesse what durst thou thinke thy selfe to good for all, or none good inough for thee! i tel thee, dorastus, there is nothing sweeter then youth, nor swifter decreasing while it is increasing. time past with folly may bee repented, but not recalled. if thou marrie in age, thy wives freshe couloures will breed in thee dead thoughtes and suspition, and thy white hayres her lothesom- nesse and sorrowe; for venus affections are not fed with kingdomes, or treasures, but with youthfull conceits and sweet amours. vulcan was allotted to shake the tree, but mars allowed to reape the fruit. yeelde, dorastus, to thy fathers perswasions, which may prevent thy perils. i have chosen thee a wife, faire by nature, royall by birth, by vertues famous, tale.] dorastus and fawnia. learned by education and rich by possessions, so that it is hard to judge whether her bounty or fortune, her beauty or vertue bee of greater force. i mean, dorastus, euphrania, daughter and heire to the king of denmarke. egistus pausing here a while, looking when his son should make him answere, and seeing that he stoode still as one in a trance, he shooke him up thus sharply. well, dorastus, take heede; the tree alpya wasteth not with fire, but withereth with the dewe: that which love nourisheth not, perisheth with hate. if thou like euphrania, thou breedest my content, and in loving her thou shalt have my love; otherwise and with that hee flung from his sonne in a rage, leaving him a sorrowfull man, in that he had by deniall displeased his father, and halfe angrie with him selfe that hee could not yeeld to that passion whereto both reason and his father perswaded him. but see how fortune is plumed with times feathers, and how shee can minister strange causes to breede straunge effectes. it happened not long after this that there was a meeting of all the farmers daughters in sycilia, whither fawnia was also bidden as the mistres of the feast, who having attired her selfe in her best garments, went among the rest of her companions to the merry meeting, there spending the day in such homely pastimes as shepheards use. as the evening grew on and their sportes ceased, ech taking their leave at other, fawnia, desiring one of her companions to beare her companie, went home by the flocke to see if they were well folded, and as they returned it fortuned that dorastus (who all that daye had bene hawking, and kilde store of game) incountred by the way these two mayds, and casting his eye sodenly on fawnia he was halfe afraid, fearing that with acteon he had seene diana; for he thought such exquisite per- ſection could not be founde in any mortall creature. as thus he stoode in a maze one of his pages told him that the maide with the garland on her head was fawnia, the faire shepheard whose beauty was so much talked of in the court, dorastus, the historie of [winter's desirous to see if nature had adorned her minde with any inward qualities, as she had decked her body with outward shape, began to question with her whose daughter she was, of what age, and how she had bin trained up ! who answered him with such modest reverence and sharpnesse of witte, that dorastus thought her outward beautie was but a counterfait to darken her inward qualities, wondring how so courtly beha- viour could be found in so simple a cottage, and cursing fortune that had shadowed wit and beauty with such hard fortune. as thus he held her a long while with chat, beauty seeing him at discovert thought not to lose the vantage, but strooke him so deepely with an invenomed shafte, as he wholy lost his libertie, and became a slave to love, which before con- temned love, glad now to gaze on a poore shepheard, who before refused the offer of a riche princesse; for the perfection of fawnia had so fired his fancie as he felt his minde greatly chaunged, and his affections altered, cursing love that had wrought such a chaunge, and blaming the basenesse of his mind that would make such a choice; but thinking that these were but passionat toies that might be thrust out at pleasure, to avoid the syren that inchaunted him he put spurs to his horse, and bad this faire shepheard farwell. fawnia (who all this while had marked the princely gesture of dorastus) seeing his face so wel featured, and each lim so perfectly framed, began greatly to praise his perfection, com- mending him so long till she found her selfe faultie, and per- ceived that if she waded but a little further she might slippe over her shooes: shee therefore, seeking to quench that fier which never was put out, went home and faining her selfe not well at ease got her to bed; where casting a thousand thoughts in her head she could take no rest: for if she waked, she began to call to minde his beautie, and thinking to beguile such thoughts with sleepe, she then dreamed of his perfection. pestered thus with these unacquainted passions, she passed the night as she could in short slumbers. dorastus (who all this while rode with a flea in his eare) tale.] dorastus and faw nia. could not by any meanes forget the sweete favour of fawnia, but rested so bewitched with her wit and beauty, as hee could take no rest. he felt fancy to give the assault, and his wounded mind readie to yeeld as vanquished: yet he began with divers considerations to suppresse this frantick affection, calling to minde that fawnia was a shepheard, one not worthy to be looked at of a prince, much lesse to bee loved of such a potentate; thinking what a discredite it were to himselfe, and what a griefe it would be to his father, blaming fortune and accusing his owne follie that should bee so fond as but once to cast a glaunce at such a country slut. as thus he was raging against him selfe, love fearing if she dallied long to loose her champion, stept more nigh, and gave him such a a fresh wounde as it pearst him at the heart, that he was faine to yeeld, maugre his face, and to forsake the companie and gette him to his chamber, where being solemnly set hee burst into these passionate tearmes. ah, dorastus, art thou alone " no not alone, while thou art tired with these unacquainted passions. yeld to fancy thou canst not by thy fathers counsaile, but in a frenzie thou art by just destinies. thy father were content if thou couldest love, and thou therefore discontent because thou doest love. o, devine love! feared of men because honoured of the gods, not to be suppressed by wisdome, because not to be compre- hended by reason; without lawe, and therefore above all law. how now, dorastus! why doest thou blaze that with praises, which thou hast cause to blaspheme with curses? yet why should they curse love that are in love? blush, dorastus, at thy fortune, thy choice, thy love: thy thoughts cannot be uttered without shame, nor thy affections without discredit. ah fawnia, sweete fawnia, thy beauty fawnia! shamest not thou, dorastus, to name one unfitte for thy birth, thy digni- ties, thy kingdomes? dye, dorastus, dorastus die. better hadst thou perish with high desires, then live in base thoughts. yea, but beautie must be obeyed because it is beauty, yet framed of the gods to feede the eye, not to fetter the heart. c the historie of [winter's ah, but he that striveth against love, shooteth with them of scyrum against the winde, and with the cockeatrice peck- eth against the steele. i will therefore obey, because i must obey. fawnia, yea fawnia shall be my fortune in spight of fortune. the gods above disdain not to love women beneath. phoebus liked sibilla, jupiter io, and why not i then fawnia? one something inferiour to these in birth, but farre superiour to them in beautie, borne to be a shepheard, but worthy to be a goddesse. ah, dorastus, wilt thou so forget thy selfe as to suffer affection to suppresse wisdome, and love to violate thine honour ! how sower will thy choice be to thy father, sorrowfull to thy subjects, to thy friends a griefe, most gladsome to thy foes! subdue then thy affections, and cease to love her whome thou couldst not love unlesse blinded with too much love. tushe, italke to the wind, and in seeking to prevent the causes i further the effectes. i will yet praise fawnia; honour, yea, and love fawnia, and at this day followe content, not counsaile. doo, dorastus: thou canst but repent. and with that his page came into the chamber, whereupon hee ceased from his complaints, hoping that time would weare out that which fortune had wrought. as thus he was pained, so poore fawnia was diversly perplexed; for the next morn- ing getting up very earely shee went to her sheepe, think- ing with hard labours to passe away her new conceived amours, beginning very busily to drive them to the field, and then to shifte the foldes. at last, (wearied with toile) she sate her down, where (poore soule) she was more tryed with fond affec- tions; for love beganne to assault her, in so much that as she sate upon the side of a hill she began to accuse her owne folly in these tearmes. infortunate fawnia, and therefore infortunate because fawnia! thy shepherds hooke sheweth thy poore state, thy proud desires an aspiring mind: the one declareth thy want, the other thy pride. no bastard hauke must soare so hie as the hobbie, no fowle gaze against the sunne but the eagle: actions wrought against nature reape despight, and thoughts tale.] dorastus and faw nia. above fortune disdaine. fawnia, thou art a shepheard, daughter to poore porrus: if thou rest content with this thou art like to stande; if thou climbe thou art sure to fal. the herb anita growing higher then sixe ynches becommeth a weede. nylus flowing more then twelve cubits procureth a dearth. daring affections that passe measure are cut shorte by time or fortune: suppresse then, fawnia, those thoughts which thou mayest shame to expresse. but ah, fawnia, love is a lord who will commaund by power, and constraine by force. dorastus, ah, dorastus is the man i love! the woorse is thy hap, and the lesse cause hast thou to hope. will eagles catch at flyes! will cedars stoupe to brambles, or mighty princes looke at such homely trulles! no, no; thinke this: dorastus disdaine is greater then thy desire; hee is a prince respecting his honour, thou a beggars brat forgetting thy calling. cease then not onely to say, but to thinke to love dorastus, and dis- semble thy love, fawnia; for better it were to dye with griefe, then to live with shame. yet in despight of love i will sigh, to see if i can sigh out love. fawnia somewhat appeasing her griefes with these pithie perswasions began, after her wonted maner, to walke about her sheepe, and to keepe them from straying into the corne, suppressing her affection with the due consideration of her base estate, and with the impossibilities of her love; thinking it were frenzy, not fancy, to covet that which the very destinies did deny her to obteine. but dorastus was more impatient in his passions, for love so fiercely assayled him, that neither companie nor musicke could mitigate his martirdome, but did rather far the more increase his maladie : shame would not let him crave counsaile in this case, nor feare of his fathers displeasure reveyle it to any secrete friend; but he was faine to make a secretarie of himselfe, and to participate his thoughtes with his owne troubled mind. lingring thus awhile in doubtfull suspence, at last stealing secretely from the court without either men or page, hee went to see if hee could espie fawnia walking c tale.] dorastus and fawnia. of pan and his cuntrey prankes, as ladies to tell of venus and her wanton toyes. our toyle is in shifting the fouldes and looking to the lambes, easie labours: oft singing and telling tales, homely pleasures: our greatest welth not to covet, our honor not to climbe, our quiet not to care. envie looketh not so lowe as shepheards: shepheards gaze not so high as ambition. we are rich in that we are poore with content, and proud only in this, that we have no cause to be proud. this wittie aunswer of fawnia so inflamed dorastus fancy, as he commended him selfe for making so good a choyce, think- ing if herbirth were aunswerable to her wit and beauty, that she were a fitte mate for the most famous prince in the worlde. he therefore beganne to siſte her more narrowely on this manner. fawnia, i see thou art content with country labours, because thou knowest not courtly pleasures. i commend thy wit, and pitty thy want; but wilt thou leave thy fathers cottage and serve a courtlie mistresse ! sir (quoth she) beggers ought not to strive against fortune, nor to gaze after honour, least either their fall be greater, or they become blinde. i am borne to toile for the court, not in the court, my nature unfit for their nurture: better live, then, in meane degree, than in high disdaine. well saide, fawnia (quoth dorastus): i gesse at thy thoughtes; thou art in love with some countrey shephearde. no, sir (quoth she): shepheards cannot love that are so simple, and maides may not love that are so young. nay, therefore (quoth dorastus) maides must love because they are young; for cupid is a child, and venus, though olde, is painted with fresh coloures. i graunt (quoth she) age may be painted with new shadowes, and youth may have imperfect affections; but what arte con- cealeth in one, ignorance revealeth in the other. dorastus seeing fawnia helde him so harde, thought it was vaine so long to beate about the bush; therefore he thought to have given her a fresh charge, but he was so prevented by certaine of his men, who missing their maister came poffing to seeke s the historie of | winter's him, seeing that he was gone foorth all alone: yet before they drewe so nie that they might heare their talke, he used these speeches. why, fawnia, perhappes i love thee, and then thou must needes yeelde, for thou knowest i can commaunde and con- straine. trueth, sir, (quoth she) but not to love; for con- strained love is force, not love: and know this, sir, mine honesty is such, as i hadde rather dye then be a concubine even to a king, and my birth is so base as i am unfitte to bee a wife to a poore farmer. why then (quoth he) thou canst not love dorastus. yes, saide fawnia, when dorastus becomes a shepheard. and with that the presence of his men broke off their parle, so that he wente with them to the palace and left fawnia sitting still on the hill side, who, seeing that the night drewe on, shifted her fouldes, and busied her selfe about other worke to drive away such fond fancies as began to trouble her braine. but all this could not prevaile; for the beautie of dorastus had made such a deepe impression in her heart, as it could not be worne out without cracking, so that she was forced to blame her owne folly in this wise. ah, fawnia, why doest thou gaze against the sunne, or catch at the winde starres are to be looked at with the eye, not reacht at with the hande: thoughts are to be measured by fortunes, not by desires: falles come not by sitting low, but by climing too hie. what then, shal al feare to fal because some happe to fall! no, lucke commeth by lot, and fortune windeth those threedes which the destinies spin. thou art favored, fawnia, of a prince, and yet thou art so fond to reject desired favours: thou hast deniall at thy tonges end, and desire at thy hearts bottome; a womans fault to spurne at that with her foote, which she greedily catcheth at with her hand. thou lovest dorastus, fawnia, and yet seemest to lower. take heede: if hee retire thou wilt repent; for unles hee love, thou canst but dye. dye then, fawnia, for dorastus doth but jest: the lyon never prayeth on the mouse, nor faul- cons stoupe not to dead stales. sit downe then in sorrow, tale.] dorastus and fawnia. ceasse to love and content thy selfe that dorastus will vouch- safe to flatter fawnia, though not to fancy fawnia. heigh ho! ah, foole, it were seemelier for thee to whistle as a shepheard, then to sigh as a lover. and with that she ceassed from these perplexed passions, folding her sheepe and hying home to her poore cottage. * but such was the incessant sorrow of dorastus to thinke on the witte and beautie of fawnia, and to see how fond hee was being a prince, and how forward she was being a beg- gar, that he began to loose his wonted appetite, to looke pale and wan; instead of mirth, to feede on melancholy, for courtly daunces to use cold dumpes; in so much that not onely his owne men, but his father and all the court began to mar- vaile at his sudden change, thinking that some lingring sick- nes had brought him into this state. wherefore he caused phisitions to come, but dorastus neither would let them mi- nister, nor so much as suffer them to see his urine; but remained stil so oppressed with these passions, as he feared in himselfe a farther inconvenience. his honor wished him to ceasse from such folly, but love forced him to follow fancy. yea, and in despight of honour, love wonne the conquest, so that his hot desires caused him to find new devises; for hee presently made himselfe a shepheards coate, that he might goe unknowne and with the lesse suspition to prattle with fawnia, and conveied it secretly into a thick grove hard joyning to the pallace, whether finding fit time and oportu- nity he went all alone, and putting off his princely apparel got on those shepheards roabes, and taking a great hooke in his hand (which he had also gotten) he went very anciently to finde out the mistres of his affection. but as he went by the way, seeing himselfe clad in such unseemely ragges, he began to smile at his owne folly and to reprove his fondnesse in these tearmes. well, said dorastus, thou keepest a right decorum; base desires and homely attires: thy thoughtes are fit for none but a shepheard, and thy apparell such as only becomes a shepheard. a strang change from a prince to a pesant! what, the historie of [winter's is it thy wretched fortune or thy wilful folly! is it thy cursed destinies, or thy crooked desires, that appointeth thee this penance ah, dorastus, thou canst but love; and unlesse thou love, thou art like to perish for love. yet, fond foole, choose flowers, not weedes; diamondes, not peables; ladies which may honor thee, not shepheards which may disgrace thee. venus is painted in silkes, not in ragges; and cupid treadeth on disdaine, when he reacheth at dignitie. and yet, dorastus, shame not at thy shepheards weede. the heavenly godes have sometime earthly thoughtes. neptune became a ram, jupiter a bul, apollo a shepheard : they gods, and yet in love; and thou a man appointed to love. devising thus with himselfe hee drew nigh to the place where fawnia was keeping her shepe, who casting her eye aside and seeing such a manerly shepheard, perfectly limmed and comming with so good a pace, she began halfe to forget dorastus and to favor this prety shepheard, whom she thought shee might both love and obtaine. but as shee was in these thoughts, she perceived then that it was the yong prince dorastus, wherefore she rose up and reverently sa- luted him. dorastus taking her by the hand repaied her curtesie with a sweete kisse, and praying her to sit downe by him, he began thus to lay the batterie. if thou marvell fawnia at my strange attyre, thou wouldest more muse at my unaccustomed thoughtes: the one disgraceth but my outward shape, the other disturbeth my inward sences. i love, fawnia, and therefore what love liketh i cannot mislike. fawnia, thou hast promised to love, and i hope thou wilt performe no lesse. i have fulfilled thy request, and now thou canst but graunt my desire. thou wert content to love dorastus when he ceast to be a prince and to become a shepheard, and see i have made the change, and therefore not to misse of my choice. trueth, quoth fawnia, but all that wear cooles are not monkes: painted eagles are pictures, not eagles. zeusis grapes were like grapes, yet shadowes: rich clothing make not princes, nor homely attyre beggers: shepheards are not tale.] dorastus and fawnia. called shepheardes because they were hookes and bagges, but that they are borne poore and live to keepe sheepe; so this attire hath not made dorastus a shepherd, but to seeme like a shepherd. well, fawnia, answered dorastus, were i a shepherd, i could not but like thee, and being a prince i am forst to love thee. take heed, fawnia: be not proud of beauties painting, for it is a flower that fadeth in the blossome. those which disdayne in youth are despised in age. beauties shadowes are tricked up with times colours, which being set to drie in the sunne are stained with the sunne, scarce pleasing the sight ere they beginne not to be worth the sight; not much unlike the herbe ephemeron, which flourisheth in the morning and is withered before the sunne setting. if my desire were against lawe, thou mightest justly deny me by reason; but i love thee, fawnia, not to misuse thee as a concubine, but to use thee as my wife. i can promise no more, and meane to performe no lesse. fawnia hearing this solemne protestation of dorastus could no longer withstand the assault, but yeelded up the forte in these friendly tearmes. ah, dorastus, i shame to expresse that thou forcest me with thy sugred speeche to confesse: my base birth causeth the one, and thy high dignities the other. beggars thoughts ought not to reach so far as kings, and yet my desires reach as high as princes. i dare not say, dorastus, i love thee, because i am a shepherd; but the gods know i have honored dorastus (pardon if i say amisse), yea, and loved dorastus with such dutiful affection as fawnia can performe, or do- rastus desire. i yeeld, not overcome with prayers but with love, resting dorastus handmaid ready to obey his wil, if no prejudice at all to his honour, nor to my credit. dorastus hearing this freendly conclusion of fawnia em- braced her in his armes, swearing that neither distance, time, nor adverse fortune, should diminish his affection; but that in despight of the destinies he would remaine loyall unto death. having thus plight their troath each to other, seeing the historie of [winter's they could not have the full fruition of their love in sycilia, for that egistus consent woulde never beegraunted to so meane a match, dorastus determined, as sone as time and oportunitie would give them leave, to provide a great masse of money, and many rich and costly jewels for the easier cariage, and then to transporte themselves and their treasure into italy, where they should leade a contented life, until such time as either he could be reconciled to his father, or els by suces- sion come to the kingdome. this devise was greatly praysed of fawnia, for she feared if the king his father should but heare of the contract, that his furie would be such as no lesse then death would stand for payment. she therefore tould him that delay bred daunger; that many mishaps did fall out be- tweene the cup and the lip; and that to avoid danger, it were best with as much speed as might be to passe out of sycilia, least fortune might prevent their pretence with some newe despight. dorastus, whom love pricked forward with desire, promised to dispatch his affaires with as great hast as either time or oportunitie would geve him leave, and so resting upon this point, after many imbracings and sweete kisses, they departed. dorastus having taken his leave of his best beloved fawnia went to the grove where hee had his rich apparel, and there uncasing himself as secretly as might be, hiding up his shepheards attire till occasion should serve againe to use it, he went to the pallace, shewing by his merrie coun- tenaunce that either the state of his body was amended, or the case of his minde greatly redressed. fawnia, poore sowle, was no lesse joyful, that being a shepheard, fortune had favoured her so as to reward her with the love of a prince, hoping in time to be advaunced from the daughter of a poore farmer to be the wife of a riche king; so that she thought every houre a yeere, till by their departure they might prevent danger, not ceasing still to goe every daye to her sheepe, not so much for the care of her flock, as for the desire she had to see her love and lord, dorastus, who often- times, when oportunitie would serve, repaired thither to feede tale.] dorastus and fawnia. his fancy with the sweet content of fawnias presence. and although he never went to visit her but in his shepheards ragges, yet his ofte repaire made him not onely suspected, but knowne to divers of their neighbours; who for the good will they bare to old porrus tould him secretly of the matter, wishing him to keepe his daughter at home, least she went so ofte to the field that shee brought him home a yong sonne, for they feared that fawnia, being so beautifull, the yong prince would allure her to folly. porrus was striken into a dump at these newes, so that thanking his neighboures for their good will, he hyed him home to his wife, and calling her aside, wringing his handes and shedding forth teares, he brake the matter to her in these tearmes. i am afraid, wife, that my daughter fawnia hath made her selfe so fine, that she will buy repentance too deare. i heare newes, which, if they be true, some will wish they had not proved true. it is tould me by my neighbours that dorastus, the kings sonne, begins to looke at oure daughter fawnia; which if it be so, i will not geve her a halfepeny for her honestie at the yeeres end. i tell thee, wife, now- adaies beautie is a great stale to trap young men, and faire wordes and sweete promises are two great enemies to a maydens honestie; and thou knowest, where poore men in- treate and cannot obtaine, there princes may commaund and wil obtaine. though kings sonnes daunce in nettes they may not be seene; but poore mens faultes are spied at a little hole. well, it is a hard case where kinges lustes are lawes, and that they should binde poore men to that which they themselves wilfully breake. peace husband (quoth his wife), take heede what you say: speake no more than you should, least you heare what you would not: great streames are to be stopped by sleight, not by force, and princes to be perswaded by submission, not by rigor. doe what you can, but no more than you may, least in saving fawnias mayden-head you loose your owne head. take heede, i say: it is ill jesting with edged tooles, and bad sporting with kinges. the wolfe had his skinne the historie of [winter's puld over his eares for but looking into the lions den. tush, wife, (quoth he) thou speakest like a foole: if the king should knowe that dorastus had begotten our daughter with childe (as i feare it will fall out little better) the kings furie would be such as, no doubt, we should both loose our goodes and lives. necessitie therefore hath no lawe, and i will prevent this mischiefe with a newe devise that is come into my head, which shall neither offend the king nor displease dorastus. i meane to take the chaine and the jewels that i found with fawnia, and carrie them to the king, letting him then to understand how she is none of my daughter, but that i founde her beaten up with the water, alone in a little boate wrapped in a riche mantle, wherein was inclosed this treasure. by this meanes i hope the king will take fawnia into his service, and we, whatsoever chaunceth, shal be blamelesse. this device pleased the good wife very well, so that they determined, assoone as they might know the king at leisure, to make him privie to this case. in the meane time dorastus was not slacke in his affaires, but applyed his matters with such diligence that he provided all thinges fitte for their journey. treasure and jewels he had gotten great store, thincking there was no better friend then money in a strange countrey: rich attire he had provided for fawnia, and, because he could not bring the matter to passe without the helpe and advice of some one, he made an old servant of his, called capnio, who had served him from his childhood, privie to his affaires; who seeing no perswasions could prevaile to divert him from his setled determination, gave his consent, and dealt so secretly in the cause that within short space hee had gotten a ship ready for their pas- sage. the mariners seeing a fitt gale of winde for their pur- pose wished capnio to make no delayes, least if they pre- termitted this good weather they might stay long ere they had such a fayre winde. capnio, fearing that his negligence should hinder the journey, in the night time conveyed the trunckes full of treasure into the shippe, and by secrete meanes let fawnia understand that the next morning they tale.] dorastus and fawnia. meant to depart. she upon this newes slept verie little that night, but gotte up very early, and wente to her sheepe, look- ing every minute when she should see dorastus, who taried not long for feare delay might breede daunger, but came as fast as he could gallop, and without any great circumstance tooke fawnia up behinde him and rode to the haven where the shippe lay, which was not three quarters of a mile dis- tant from that place. he no sooner came there but the marriners were readie with their cockboate to set them aboard, where being coucht together in a cabben they past away the time in recounting their old loves till their man capnio should come. porrus, who had heard that this morning the king would go abroade to take the ayre, called in haste to his wife to bring him his holyday hose and his best jacket, that he might goe like an honest substantiall man to tell his tale. his wife, a good cleanly wenche, brought him all things fitte, and spungd him up very handsomlie, giving him the chaines and jewels in a little boxe, which porrus for the more safety put in his bosom. having thus all his trinkets in a readi- nes, taking his staffe in his hand he bad his wife kisse him for good lucke, and so hee went towards the pallace. but as he was going, fortune (who meant to she we him a little false play) prevented his purpose in this wise. he met by chaunce in his way capnio, who trudging as fast as he could with a little coffer under his arme to the ship, and spying porrus, whome he knewe to be fawnias father, going towardes the pallace, being a wylie fellow, began to doubt the worst, and therefore crost him by the way, and askt him whither he was going so earely this morning ! porrus (who knew by his face that he was one of the court) meaning simply, told him that the kings son dorastus dealt hardly with him; for he had but one daughter who was a little beautifull, and that the neighboures told him the young prince had allured her to folly: he went therefore now to complaine to the king how greatly he was abused. capnio (who straight way smelt the whole matter) began to soth him in his talke, and said that dorastus dealt not the historie of [winter's like a prince to spoile any poore manes daughter in that sort: he therefore would doe the best for him he could, because he knew he was an honest man. but (quoth capnio) you lose your labour in going to the pallace, for the king meanes this day to take the aire of the sea and to goe aboord of a shippe that lies in the haven. i am going before, you see, to provide all things in redinesse, and if you wil follow my counsaile, turne back with me to the haven, where i will set you in such a fitte place as you may speake to the king at your pleasure. porrus giving credit to capnios smooth tale, gave him a thou- sand thanks for his friendly advise, and went with him to the haven, making all the way his complaintes of dorastus, yet concealing secretlie the chaine and the jewels. as soone as they were come to the sea side, the marriners seeing capnio came a land with their cock-boote, who still dissembling the matter demaunded of porrus if he would go see the ship? who, unwilling and fearing the worst because he was not well acquainted with capnio, made his excuse that he could not brooke the sea, therefore would not trouble him. capnio, seeing that by faire meanes hee could not get him aboord, comaunded the mariners that by violence they should carrie him into the shippe; who like sturdy knaves hoisted the poore shepheard on their backes, and bearing him to the boate launched from the land. porrus seeing himselfe so cunningly betraied durst not crie out, for hee sawe it would not prevaile, but began to intreate capnio and the marriners to be good to him, and to pittie his estate: hee was but a poore man that lived by his labour. they laughing to see the shepheard so afraide made as much haste as they could, and set him aboorde. porrus was no sooner in the shippe but he saw dorastus walking with fawnia; yet he scarse knew her, for she had attired her selfe in riche apparell, which so increased her beauty that shee resembled rather an angell then a mortall creature. dorastus and fawnia were halfe astonished to see the olde shepherd, marvailing greatly what wind had brought him thither, til capnio told him al the whole discourse; how tale.] dorastus and faw nia. porrus was going to make his complaint to the king, if by policie he had not prevented him, and therefore now, sith he was aboord, for the avoiding of further danger it were best to carrie him into italy. dorastus praised greatly his mans devise, and allowed of his counsaile; but fawnia (who stil feared porrus as her father) began to blush for shame, that by her meanes he should either incure daunger or displeasure. the old shephard hearing this hard sentence, that he should on such a sodaine be caried from his wife, his country, and kinsfolke, into a forraine lande amongst straungers, be- gan with bitter teares to make his complaint, and on his knees to intreate dorastus, that pardoning his unadvised folly he would give him leave to goe home; swearing that hee would keepe all thinges as secret as they could wish. but these protestations could not prevaile, although fawnia in- treated dorastus very earnestly; but the mariners hoisting their maine sailes waied ankers, and hailed into the deepe, where we leave them to the favour of the wind and seas, and returne to egistus. who having appointed this day to hunt in one of his forests called for his sonne dorastus to go sport himselfe, because hee saw that of late hee began to loure; but his men made answer that hee was gone abroade none knew whither, except he were gone to the grove to walke all alone, as his custome was to doe every day. the king willing to waken him out of his dumpes sent one of his men to goe seeke him, but in vaine, for at last he returned, but finde him he could not, so that the king went himselfe to goe see the sport; where passing away the day, returning at night from hunting, hee asked for his sonne, but hee could not be heard of, which drave the king into a great choler: where upon most of his noblemen and other courtiers poasted abroad to seek him, but they could not heare of him through all sicilia, onely they missed capnio his man, which againe made the king suspect that hee was not gone farre. the historie of [winter's two or three daies being passed, and no newes heard of dorastus, egistus began to feare that he was devoured with some wilde beastes, and upon that made out a greate troupe of men to go seeke him; who coasted through all the coun- trey, and searched in everie daungerous and secrete place, untill at last they mette with a fisherman that was mending his nettes when dorastus and fawnia tooke shipping; who being examined if he either knewe or heard where the kinges sonne was, without any secrecie at all revealed the whole matter, how he was sayled two dayes past, and had in his company his man capnio, portus and his faire daughter fawnia. this heavie newes was presently caryed to the king, who, halfe dead for sorrow commaunded porrus wife to bee sent for. she being come to the pallace, after due examination, confessed that her neighbours had oft told her that the kings sonne was too familier with fawnia, her daughter; whereuppon, her husband, fearing the worst, about two dayes past (hearing the king should goe an hunting) rose earely in the morning and went to make his complaint; but since she neither heard of him, nor saw him. egistus perceiving the womans unfeyned simplicity, let her depart without incurring further displeasure, conceiving such secret greeſe for his sonnes recklesse follie, that he had so forgotten his honour and parentage by so base a choise to dishonor his father and discredit himselfe, that with very care and thought he fel into a quartan fever, which was so unfit for his aged yeeres and complexion, that he became so weake as the phisitions would graunt him no life. but his sonne dorastus little regarded either father, coun- trie, or kingdome in respect of his lady fawnia; for fortune smyling on this young novice lent him so lucky a gale of winde for the space of a day and a night, that the maryners lay and slept upon the hatches; but on the next morning, about the breake of day the aire began to be overcast, the winds to rise, the seas to swel, yea, presently there arose such a fearfull tempest, as the ship was in danger to be swallowed tale.] dorastus and fawnia. up with every sea, the maine mast with the violence of the wind was thrown over boord, the sayles were torne, the tack- lings went in sunder, the storme raging still so furiously that poore fawnia was almost dead for feare, but that she was greatly comforted with the presence of dorastus. the tem- pest continued three dayes, at which time the mariners everie minute looked for death, and the aire was so darkned with cloudes that the maister could not tell by his compasse in what coast they were. but upon the fourth day, about ten of the clocke, the wind began to cease, the sea to wax calme, and the sky to be cleare, and the mariners descryed the coast of bohemia, shooting of their ordance for joy that they had escaped such a fearefull tempest. dorastus hearing that they were arrived at some harbour sweetly kissed fawnia, and bad her be of good cheare: when they tolde him that the port belonged unto the cheife cittie of bohemia, where pandosto kept his court, dorastus began to be sad, knowing that his father hated no man so much as pandosto, and that the king himself had sought secretly to betray egistus: this considered, he was halfe afraide to goe on land, but that capnio counselled him to chaunge his name and his countrey, until such time as they could get some other barke to transport them into italy. dorastus liking this devise made his case privy to the marriners, rewarding them bountifully for their paines, and charging them to saye that he was a gentleman of trapolonia called meleagrus. the shipmen, willing to shew what friendship they could to dorastus, promised to be as secret as they could, or hee might wish; and uppon this they landed in a little village a mile distant from the citie, where after they had rested a day, thinking to make provision for their mariage, the fame of fawnias beauty was spread throughout all the citie, so that it came to the eares of pandosto; who then being about the age of fifty had notwithstanding yong and freshe affections, so that he desired greatly to see fawnia; and to bring this matter the better to passe, hearing they had but one man, d the historie of [winter's and how they rested at a very homely house, he caused them to be apprehended as spies, and sent a dozen of his garde to take them: who being come to their lodging tolde them the kings message. dorastus no whit dismayed, ac- companied with fawnia and capnio, went to the court (for they left porrus to keepe the stuffe) who being admitted to the kings presence, dorastus and fawnia with humble obey- sance saluted his majestie. pandosto amazed at the singular perfection of fawnia stood halfe astonished, viewing her beauty, so that he had almost forgot himselfe what hee had to doe: at last with stearne countenance he demaunded their names, and of what countrey they were, and what caused them to land in bohe- mia sir (quoth dorastus) know that my name meleagrus is, a knight borne and brought up in trapolonia, and this gen- tlewoman, whom i meane to take to my wife, is an italian, borne in padua, from whence i have now brought her. the cause i have so small a trayne with me is for that her friends unwilling to consent, i intended secretly to convey her into trapolonia; whither as i was sailing, by distresse of weather i was driven into these coasts: thus have you heard my name, my country, and the cause of my voiage. pandosto, starting from his seat as one in choller, made this rough reply. meleagrus, i feare this smooth tale hath but small trueth, and that thou coverest a foule skin with faire paintings. no doubt this ladie by her grace and beauty is of her degree more meete for a mighty prince, then for a simple knight, and thou like a perjured traitour hath bereft her of her pa- rents, to their present griefe and her insuing sorrow. till therefore i heare more of her parentage and of thy calling i will stay you both here in bohemia. dorastus, in whome rested nothing but kingly valor, was not able to suffer the reproches of pandosto, but that he made him this answer. it is not meete for a king without due proofe to appeach any man of ill behaviour, nor upon suspition to inferre beleeſe: tale.] dorastus and fawn ia. straungers ought to bee entertained with courtesie not to bee intreated with crueltie, least being forced by want to put up injuries, the gods revenge their cause with rigor. pandosto hearing dorastus utter these wordes commaunded that he should straight be committed to prison untill such time as they heard further of his pleasure; but as for fawnia, he charged that she should be entertained in the court with such curtesie as belonged to a straunger and her calling. the rest of the shipmen he put into the dungeon. having thus hardly handled the supposed trapolonians, pandosto, contrarie to his aged yeares, began to be somwhat tickled with the beauty of fawnia, in so much that hee could take no rest, but cast in his old head a thousand new devises: at last he fell into these thoughtes. how art thou pestred, pandosto, with fresh affections, and unfitte fancies, wishing to possesse with an unwilling mynde, and a hot desire troubled with a could disdaine! shall thy mynde yeeld in age to that thou hast resisted in youth ! peace, pandosto: blabbe not out that which thou maiest be ashamed to reveale to thy self. ah, fawnia is beautifull, and it is not for thine honour (fond foole) to name her that is thy captive, and an other man's concubine. alas, i reach at that with my hand which my hart would faine refuse; playing like the bird ibys in egipt, which hateth serpents yet feed- eth on their egges. tush, hot desires turne oftentimes to colde disdaine: love is brittle, where appetite, not reason, beares the sway: kinges thoughtes ought not to climbe so high as the heavens, but to looke no lower then honour: bet- ter it is to pecke at the starres with the young eagles, then to pray on dead carkasses with the vulture: tis more honour- able for pandosto to dye by concealing love, than to enjoy such unfitte love. dooth pandosto then love? yea: whome a maide unknowne, yea, and perhapps immodest, stragled out of her owne countrie; beautifull, but not therefore chast; comely in bodie, but perhappes crooked in minde. cease then, pandosto, to looke at fawnia, much lesse to love the historie of [winter's her: be not overtaken with a womans beauty, whose eyes are framed by arte to inamour, whose hearte is framed by nature to inchaunt, whose false teares knowe their true times, and whose sweete wordes pearce deeper then sharpe swordes. here pandosto ceased from his talke, but not from his love : although he sought by reason and wisedome to suppresse this franticke affection, yet he could take no rest, the beauty of fawnia had made such a deepe impression in his heart. but on a day, walking abroad into a parke which was hard adjoining to his house, he sent by one of his servants for fawnia, unto whome he uttered these wordes. fawnia, i commend thy beauty and wit, and now pittie thy distresse and want; but if thou wilt forsake sir meleagrus, whose poverty, though a knight, is not able to maintaine an estate aunswerable to thy beauty, and yeld thy consent to pandosto, i wil both increase thee with dignities and riches. no, sir, answered fawnia; meleagrus is a knight that hath wonne me by love, and none but he shal weare me: his sinister mischance shall not diminish my affection, but rather increase my good will: thinke not, though your grace hath imprisoned him without cause, that feare shall make mee yeeld my consent: i had rather be meleagrus wife and a begger, then live in plenty and be pandostos concubine. pandosto hearing the assured aunswere of fawnia would, notwithstanding, prosecute his suite to the uttermost, seeking with faire words and great promises to scale the fort of her chastitie, swearing that if she would graunt to his desire meleagrus should not only be set at libertie, but honoured in his courte amongst his nobles. but these alluring baytes could not entise her minde from the love of her newe betrothed mate meleagrus; which pandosto seeing he left her alone for that time to consider more of the demaund. fawnia being alone by her selfe began to enter into these solitarie meditations. ah, infortunate fawnia! thou seest to desire above fortune tale.] dorastus and fawnia. is to strive against the gods, and fortune. who gazeth at the sunne weakeneth his sight: they which stare at the skie fall ofte into deepe pits: haddest thou rested content to have bene a shepheard, thou needest not to have feared mischaunce: better had it bene for thee by sitting lowe to have had quiet, then by climing high to have fallen into miserie. but alas, i feare not mine owne daunger, but dorastus displeasure. ah sweete dorastus, thou art a prince, but now a prisoner, by too much love procuring thine owne losse: haddest thou not loved fawnia thou haddest benefortunate: shall i then be false to him that hath forsaken kingdomes for my cause! no: would my death might deliver him, so mine honour might be pre- served with that, fetching a deepe sigh, she ceased from her complaints, and went againe to the pallace, injoying a libertie without content, and profered pleasure with smal joy. but poore dorastus lay all this while in close prison, being pinched with a hard restraint, and pained with the burden of colde and heavie irons, sorrowing sometimes that his fond affection had procured him this mishappe, that by the disobedience of his parentes he had wrought his owne despight: an other while cursing the gods and fortune, that they should crosse him with such sinister chaunce, uttering at last his passions in these words. ah, unfortunate wretch! borne to mishappe, now thy folly hath his desert: art thou not worthie for thy base minde to have bad fortune could the destinies favour thee, which hast forgot thine honor and dignities? wil not the gods plague him in despight that payneth his father with dis- obedience oh, gods ! if any favour or justice be left, plague me, but favour poore fawnia, and shrowd her from the tirannies of wretched pandosto; but let my death free her from mishap, and then welcome death. dorastus payned with these heavie passions sorrowed and sighed, but in vaine, for which he used the more patience. but againe to pandosto, who broyling at the heat of unlawfull lust, coulde take no rest, but still felt his minde disquieted with his new the historie of [winter's love, so that his nobles and subjectes marveyled greatly at this sudaine alteration, not being able to conjecture the cause of this his continued care. pandosto, thinking every hower a yeare til he had talked once againe with fawnia, sent for her secretly into his chamber, whither though fawnia un- willingly comming, pandosto entertained her very courte- ously, using these familiar speaches, which fawnia answered as shortly in this wise. pandosto. fawnia, are you become lesse wilfull and more wise to preferre the love of a king before the liking of a poore knight! i thinke ere this you thinke it is better to be favoured of a king then of a subject. fawnia. - pandosto, the body is subject to victories, but the minde not to be subdued by conquest: honesty is to be preferred before honour; and a dramme of faith weigheth downe a tunne of gold. i have promised to meleagrus to love, and will performe no lesse. pandosto. fawnia, i know thou art not so unwise in thy choice as to refuse the offer of a king, nor so ingrateful as to dispise a good turne. thou art now in that place where i may com- maunde, and yet thou seest i intreate : my power is such as i may compell by force, and yet i sue by prayers. yeelde, fawnia, thy love to him which burneth in thy love: melea- grus shall be set free, thy countrymen discharged, and thou both loved and honoured. fawnia. i see, pandosto, where lust ruleth it is a miserable thing to be a virgin; but know this, that i will alwaies preferre ſame before life, and rather choose death then dishonour. tale.] dorastus and fawnia. pandosto seeing that there was in fawnia a determinate courage to love meleagrus, and a resolution without feare to hate him, flong away from her in a rage, swearing if in shorte time she would not be wonne with reason, he would forget all courtesie, and compel her to graunt by rigour: but these threatning wordes no whit dismayed fawnia, but that she still both dispighted and dispised pandosto. while thus these two lovers strove, the one to winne love, the other to live in hate, egistus heard certaine newes by merchauntes of bohemia, that his sonne dorastus was imprisoned by pan- dosto, which made him feare greatly that his sonne should be but hardly entreated: yet considering that bellaria and hee was cleared by the oracle of apollo from that crime wherewith pandosto had unjustly charged them, he thought best to send with all speed to pandosto, that he should set free his sonne dorastus, and put to death fawnia and her father porrus. finding this by the advise of counsaile the speediest remedy to release his sonne, he caused presently too of his shippes to be rigged, and thoroughly furnished with provision of men and victuals, and sent divers of his nobles embassadoures into bohemia; who willing to obey their king, and receive their yong prince, made no delayes for feare of danger, but with as much speede as might be sailed towards bohemia. the winde and seas favored them greatly, which made them hope of some good happe, for within three daies they were landed; which pandosto no sooner heard of their arrivall, but he in person went to meete them, intreating them with such sumptuous and familiar courtesie, that they might well perceive how sory he was for the former injuries he had offered to their king, and how willing (if it might be) to make amendes. as pandosto made report to them, how one maleagrus, a knight of trapolonia, was lately arived with a lady called fawnia in his land, comming very suspitiously, accompanied onely with one servant and an olde shepheard, the embassa- dours perceived by the halfe, what the whole tale ment, and the historie of [winter's began to conjecture that it was dorastus, who for feare to bee knowne had chaunged his name; but dissembling the matter they shortly arrived at the court, where after they had bin verie solemnly and sumptuously feasted, the noble men of sicilia being gathered togither, they made reporte of their embassage, where they certified pandosto that me- leagrus was sonne and heire to the king egistus, and that his name was dorastus; how contrarie to the kings minde he had privilie convaied away that fawnia, intending to marrie her, being but daughter to that poore shepheard porrus : whereupon the kings request was that capnio, fawnia, and porrus, might be murthered and put to death, and that his sonne dorastus might be sent home in safetie. pandosto having attentively, and with great mervaile, heard their embassage, willing to reconcile himselfe to egistus and to shew him how greatlie he esteemed his labour, although love and fancy forbad him to hurt fawnia, yet in despight of love hee determined to execute egistus will without mercy; and therefore he presently sent for dorastus out of prison, who mervailing at this unlooked for curtesie, found at his comming to the kings presence that which he least doubted of, his fathers embassadours; who no sooner saw him, but with great reverence they honored him, and pandosto em- bracing dorastus set him by him very lovingly in a chaire of estate. dorastus, ashamed that his follie was bewraied, sate a long time as one in a muse, til pandosto told him the summe of his fathers embassage; which he had no sooner heard, but he was toucht at the quicke, for the cruell sen- tence that was pronounced against fawnia. but neither could his sorrow nor his perswasions prevaile, for pandosto commaunded that fawnia, porrus, and capnio, should bee brought to his presence; who were no sooner come, but pan- dosto, having his former love turned to a disdainful hate, began to rage against fawnia in these tearines. thou disdainfull vassal, thou currish kite, assigned by the destinies to base fortune, and yet with an aspiring minde tale.] dorastus and fawnia. gazing after honor, how durst thou presume, being a beggar, to match with a prince by thy alluring lookes to inchant the sonne of a king to leave his owne countrie to fulfill thy disordinate lusts o despightfull minde a proud heart in a beggar is not unlike to a great fire in a smal cottage, which warmeth not the house, but burneth it: assure thy selfe that thou shalt die. and thou, old doating foole, whose follie hath bene such as to suffer thy daughter to reach above thy for- tune, looke for no other meede but the like punishment. but capnio, thou which hast betrayed the king, and hast con- sented to the unlawfull lust of thy lord and maister, i know not how justly i may plague thee: death is too easie a pu- nishment for thy falsehood, and to live (if not in extreme miserie) were not to shew thee equitie. i therefore award that thou shall have thine eyes put out, and continually while thou diest, grinde in a mil like a brute beast. the feare of death brought a sorrowfull silence upon fawnia and capnio, but porrus seeing no hope of life burst forth into these speeches. pandosto, and ye noble embassadours of sicilia, seeing without cause i am condemned to die, i am yet glad i have opportunitie to disburden my conscience before my death. i will tel you as much as i know, and yet no more than is true. whereas i am accused that i have bene a supporter of fawnias pride, and shee disdained as a vilde begger, so it is, that i am neither father unto her, nor she daughter unto me. for so it happened, that i being a poore shepheard in si- cilia, living by keeping other mens flockes, one of my sheepe straying downe to the sea side, as i went to seeke her, i saw a little boat driven upon the shoare, wherein i found a babe of sixe daies olde, wrapped in a mantle of skarlet, having about the necke this chaine. i pittying the child, and de- sirous of the treasure, carried it home to my wife, who with great care nursed it up and set it to keepe sheepe. heere is the chaine and the jewels, and this fawnia is the childe whome i found in the boate. what shee is, or of what pa- e - the historie of [winter's rentage i knowe not, but this i am assured that shee is none of mine. - pandosto would scarce suffer him to tell out his tale, but that he enquired the time of the yeere, the manner of the boate and other circumstaunces; which when he found agree- ing to his count he sodainelie leapt from his seate and kissed fawnia, wetting her tender cheeks with his teares, and cry- ing, my daughter fawnia ah sweete fawnia i am thy father, fawnia. this sodaine passion of the king drave them all into a maze, especially fawnia and dorastus. but when the king had breathed himselfe a while in this newe joy, hee rehearsed before the embassadours the whole matter, how hee had entreated his wife bellaria for jealousie, and that this was the childe whome hee had sent to floate in the seas. fawnia was not more joyfull that she had found such a father, then dorastus was glad he should get such a wife. the embassadors rejoyced that their yong prince had made such a choice, that those kingdomes, which through enmitie had long time been dissevered, should now through perpetual amitie be united and reconciled. the citizens and subjects of bohemia (hearing that the king had found againe his daughter, which was supposed dead, joyfull that there was an heire apparent to his kingdome) made bonfires and showes throughout the cittie. the courtiers and knights appointed justs and turneis to signifie their willing mindes in gratifying the kings hap. eighteene daies being past in these princely sports, pan- dosto, willing to recompence old porrus, of a shepheard made him a knight; which done, providing a sufficient navie to receive him and his retinue, accompanied with dorastus, fawnia, and the sicilian embassadours, he sailed towards sicilia, where he was most princelie entertained by egistus; who hearing this most comicall event, rejoyced greatly at his sonnes good happe, and without delay (to the perpetuall joy of the two yong lovers) celebrated the marriage: which was tale.] dorastus and fawnia. no sooner ended, but pandosto (calling to mind how first he betraied his friend egistus, how his jealousie was the cause of bellarias death, that contrarie to the law of nature hee had lusted after his owne daughter) moved with these desperate thoughts, he fell into a melancholie fit, and to close up the comedie with a tragicall stratageme, hee slewe himselfe; whose death being many daies bewailed of fawnia, dorastus, and his deere friend egistus, dorastus, taking his leave of his father, went with his wife and the dead corps into bohemia, where after they were sumptuouslie intoombed, dorastus ended his daies in contented quiet. fin is. notes. page , line , “this, since thou must goe,” &c.; we ought to read “thus since,” &c. as it stands in some of the later editions. page , line , “having neither saile nor other to guid it,” &c.; we ought to read, “having neither saile nor rudder to guid it." the error is corrected in the impressions subsequent to that which is con- sidered the first. page , line , for “his babe innocent,” read, “his babe an inno- cent." page , line , “sackles" is guiltless; and in some of the later editions (as in that of ), the one word is substituted for the other. page , line , “thou seest my white hayres are blossomes for the grave,” &c. percy in his “reliques,” ii, , edit. , quotes the following as part of an old song on the story of the beggars daugh- ter of bethnall green:— “his reverend lockes in comelye curles did wave, and on his aged temples grewe the blossomes of the grave.” page , line , “we are rich in that we are poore with content.” so shakespeare, othello, act iii, scene :— “poor and content is rich, and rich enough." page , line , “starres are to be looked at with the eye, not reacht at with the hand.” so shakespeare, two gentlemen of verona, act iii, scene :— “wilt thou reach stars, because they shine on thee ?” page , line , “though kings sonnes daunce in nettes, they may not be seene.” alluding to the old story of the fisherman's daughter who was ordered to dance before a great lord, so that she might be seen, yet not seen, to effect which she covered herself with one of her father's nets. the italian fool and jester gonella for the same purpose is said to have put himself behind a sieve. page , line , “who willing to obey their king, and receive the yong prince,” &c. ought we not to read relieve instead of receire, though the old copies follow the edition of ° page , line , “and to shew him how greatlie he esteemed his labour." later editions read favour for labour, which is clearly right. rosalynd. eu phues’ golden legacie, found after his death in his c e l l a t s i l e x e d r a. &c. by thomas lodge, gent. upon which shakespeare founded his “as you like it.” reprinted from the edition of . london : thomas rodd, , great newport street. mdcccxli. introduction. steevens, speaking of the obligations of shakespeare to the novel we have here reprinted, says, that our great dra- matist followed it “more exactly than is his general custom, when he is indebted to such worthless originals.” let it be remembered, that this opinion as to the value of lodge's “rosalynd” was given by the commentator who asserted that the force of an act of parliament would not be sufficient to compel people to read shakespeare's sonnets, and who pro- nounced watson a more elegant writer than shakespeare in that department of poetry. comparing “rosalynd” with “as you like it,” the former may indeed be termed “worthless,” inasmuch as shakespeare's play is so immeasurably superior to it; but steevens spoke in the abstract of works of the kind of which shakespeare had availed himself; and placing lodge's novel by the side of other productions of the same class, we cannot hesitate to declare it a very amusing and varied composition, full of agreeable and graceful invention (for we are aware of no foreign authority for any of the incidents), and with much natural force and simplicity in the style of the narrative. that it is here and there disfigured by the faults of the time, by forced conceits, by lowness of allusion and expression, and sometimes by inconsistency and want of decorum in the characters, cannot be denied. these are errors which the judgment and genius of shakespeare taught him to avoid; but the admitted extent and nature of his general obligations to lodge afford a high tribute to the excellence of that “ori- ginal,” which steevens pronounced “worthless.” it may almost be doubted whether he had even taken the trouble to ii introduction. read carefully that performance upon which he delivered so dogmatical and definitive a condemnation. as in the case of greene's “dorastus and fawnia,” so in that of lodge’s “rosalynd,” the means of exact comparison between it and the play being now (for the first time) afforded to the modern reader, it would only be a waste of time and space for us to enter into any details on the point. the re- semblance throughout will be found rather general than par- ticular; and the characters of jaques, touchstone, and au- drey are entirely new in shakespeare. the names of the other personages engaged in the drama have also been changed, with the exception of those of the heroine, phoebe, adam, and charles the wrestler. the edition we have followed is that of , in to, b. l.; and by our notes it will be seen that we have carefully col- lated it with the impression of . “rosalynd” originally came out in ; but ritson was unacquainted with its ex- istence, and as no perfect copy of the first edition is known, we have necessarily adopted the text of the second. it was reprinted at least ten times before the breaking out of the civil wars—a sufficient evidence of the popularity of the story. on the title-page lodge tells us that it was “fetched from the canaries;” and in the dedication he informs lord hunsdon that he wrote the novel “to beguile the time” while he was on a voyage “to the islands of terceras and the canaries,” with captain clarke. he does not speak of it as a transla- tion (as he does of his “margarite of america,” printed in , and written in while lodge was at sea with ca- vendish), and there is no reason to suppose that it was not an original production. several of the poems interspersed in “rosalynd” were copied into “england's helicon,” to, . we have it on lodge's own evidence (see the dedication), that he was educated at oxford under sir edward hobby, and that he was contemporary there with two of the sons of lord hunsdon. in fact, he was entered at trinity college introduction. iii in , and, as anthony wood states, took “one degree in arts;” after which he went to london. there he joined a theatrical company, became an actor and a dramatic author, and about wrote a defence of stage-plays, in answer to stephen gosson’s “school of abuse,” which had been printed in the preceding year. lodge's defence was sup- pressed by the public authorities, and only two copies of it are now known, both of which have been mutilated, being without title-pages. his oldest production with a date is his “alarum against usurers,” to, , in which he mentions the fate of his answer to gosson. it seems likely that he en- tered the army soon afterwards, and accompanied captains clarke and cavendish on their several expeditions. at the close of his “rosalynd,” lodge promises a work which, as far as we know, was never printed, to be called “the sailor's calendar,” and it most likely had relation to his sea adventures. however, we find him again in connec- tion with the stage soon after ; and his tragedy called “the wounds of civil war” was published in . this is the only extant dramatic piece which he wrote alone, though he had joined robert greene in “a looking glass for london and england,” which must have been composed be- fore september , and was printed in the next year. if any other dramas came from his pen, we have no record of them either in print or in manuscript; but as he certainly wrote with much facility, it is likely that he produced several other plays for the association of actors with which philip hens- lowe was connected, and of which lodge was a member. as early as , we learn from the title-page of his “scilla's metamorphosis,” that he was a “student of lincoln's inn,” and he still styled himself “ of lincoln's inn, gentle- man,” when he published his “fig for momus,” in . how soon, and from what motive, he abandoned the study of the law and took up that of medicine, we have no infor- mation: probably it happened about the year , when he published his latest miscellaneous work, “wits miserie,” iv ntroduction. and dated it “from my house at low layton.” wood says that he took his degree in medicine at avignon; but we hear no more of him until , when he printed “a treatise on the plague,” which was then raging in london; and of which disorder he is supposed to have died in . in the interval he practised as a physician, and is mentioned by his contemporary dramatist and actor, thomas heywood, in his troja britannica, , in that capacity. lodge was the author of a translation of josephus, in , and of seneca in ; and in he obtained a passport from the privy council, that he might “travel into the arch duke's country,” to “recover debts,” said to be due to him, though circum- stances make it appear likely that it was to avoid his own creditors. it seems not improbable that our novelist and poet was in some way related to sir thomas lodge, who was lord mayor of london in , and regarding the necessity of supporting whose credit a letter from the lord treasurer is preserved among the lansdowne mss. in the british mu- seum (no. .) sir thomas lodge was one of the persons who fitted out the minion and primrose for the coast of guinea in (see hakluyt's voyages); and it is very possible that the author of “rosalynd” accompanied clarke and cavendish on their respective expeditions in conse- quence of his family connection with one of the promoters of previous naval adventures. he speaks of his “birth,” and of “the offspring from whence he came,” in his earliest dated production, and for aught that appears to the contrary, he might be the son of sir thomas lodge, who met with misfortunes both during and subsequent to his mayoralty. this, however, is a new point of speculation, not touched by any of those who have hitherto adverted to the particulars of the life of the author of the ensuing novel. | roſalynde. euphues golden legacie, found aſ- ter his death in his cell at sile- xedra. b e q v e a t h e d to ph i l a v t v s sonnes, nursed vp with their father in england. fetcht from the canaries by t. l. gent. l on do n printed by abel ieffes for t. g. and iohn bushi.e. . to the right honorable and his most es- teemed lord the lord of hunsdon, lord chamberlaine to her majesties houshold, and governor of her towne of barwicke : t. l. g. wisheth increase of all honourable vertues. such romanes (right honorable) as delighted in martiall exploites, attempted their actions in the honour of augustus, because he was a patron of souldiors : and virgil dignified him with his poems, as a maecenas of schollers; both joyntly advancing his royaltie, as a prince warlike and learned. such as sacrifice to pallas present her with bayes as she is wise, and with armour as she is valiant; observing heerein that excellent ro resrow, which dedicateth honours according to the perfection of the person. when i entred (right honora- ble) with a deepe insight into the consideration of these pre- misses, seeing your l. to be a patron of all martiall men, and a maecenas of such as apply themselves to studie, wearing with pallas both the launce and the bay, and aiming with augustus at the favour of all, by the honourable vertues of your minde, being myselfe first a student, and afterwards falling from bookes to armes, even vowed in all my thoughts dutifully to affect your lordshippe. having with captaine clarke made a voyage to the ilands of terceras and the canaries, to beguile the time with labour i writ this booke; rough, as hatcht in the stormes of the ocean, and feathered in the surges of many perillous seas. but as it is the woorke of a souldiour and a scholler, i presumed to shrowd it under your honors patronage, as one that is the fautor and favourer of all vertuous actions; and whose honorable loves, growne from the generall applause of the whole common-welth for your higher desertes, may keepe it from the mallice of every b the epistle dedicatorie. bitter toong. other reasons more particular (right honourable) chalenge in me a speciall affection to your lordshippe, as being a scholler with your two noble sonnes, maister edmund carew, and m. robert carew, (two siens worthy of so ho- norable a tree, and a tree glorious in such honourable fruite) as also being scholler in the universitie under that learned and vertuous knight sir edward hobby, when he was batcheler in artes, a man as well lettered as well borne, and, after the etymologie of his name, soaring as high as the winges of knowledge can mount him, happie every way, and the more fortunate, as blessed in the honor of so vertuous a lady. thus (right honourable) the duetie that i owe to the sonnes, chargeth me that all my affection be placed on the father; for where the braunches are so pretious, the tree of force must be most excellent. commaunded and imboldened thus, with the consideration of these forepassed reasons, to present my booke to your lordship, i humbly intreate your honour will vouch of my labours, and favour a souldiers and a schollers penne with your gratious acceptance, who an- sweres in affection what he wants in eloquence; so devoted to your honour, as his only desire is, to ende his life under the favour of so martiall and learned a patron. resting thus in hope of your lordships curtesie, in deyning the patronage of my worke, i cease, wishing you as many honorable for- tunes as your l. can desire or i imagine. your honors souldiour most humbly affectionate: thomas lodge. to the gentlemen readers. gentlemen, looke not heere to finde anie sprigs of pallas bay tree, nor to heare the humour of any amorous lawreat, nor the pleasing vaine of any eloquent orator: nolo allum sºpere, they bee matters above my capacitie: the coblers checke shal never light on my heade, ne su!or ultra crepi- dam, i will go no further than the latchet, and then all is wel. heere you may perhaps finde some leaves of venus mirtle, but hewen down by a souldier with his curtlaxe, not boght with the allurement of a filed tongue. to bee briefe, gentle- men, roome for a souldier and a sailer, that gives you the fruits of his labors that he wrote in the ocean, when everie line was wet with a surge, and every humorous passion countercheckt with a storme. if you like it, so; and yet i will bee yours in duetie, if you be mine in favour. but if momus or any squinteied asse, that hath mighty eares to con- ceive with midas, and yet little reason to judge, if he come abord our barke to find fault with the tackling, when hee knowes not the shrowds, ile downe into the hold, and fetch out a rustie pollax, that sawe no sunne this seaven yeare, and either well bebast him, or heave the cockescombe over boord to feed cods. but curteous gentlemen, that favour most, back- bite none, and pardon what is overslipt, let such come and welcome; ile into the stewards roome, and fetch them a kanne of our best bevradge. well, gentlemen, you have euphues legacie. i fetcht it as farre as the ilands of terceras, and therefore read it: censure with favour, and farewell. yours, t. l. the scedule annexed to eu phues testament, the tenour of his legacie, the token of his love. the vehemency of my sicknes (philautus) hath made mee doubtfull of life, yet must i die in counsailing thee like socrates, because i love thee. thou hast sons by camilla, as i heare, who being yong in yeres have green thoghts, and nobly born have great minds: bend them in their youth like the willow, least thou bewayle them in their age for their wilfulnes. i have bequeathed them a golden legacie, be- cause i greatly love thee. let them read it as archelaus did cassender, to profit by it; and in reading let them medi- tate, for i have approved it the best methode. they shall find love anatomized by euphues with as lively colours as in appelles table: roses to whip him when he is wanton, reasons to withstand him when he is wilie. here may they read that vertue is the king of labours, opinion the mistres of fooles; that vanitie is the pride of nature, and contention the overthrow of fa- milies: here is elleborus, bitter in taste, but beneficial in triall. i have nothing to sende thee and camilla but this counsel, that in stead of worldly goods you leave your sons vertue and glorie; for better were they to bee partakers of your honours then lords of your mannors. i feele death that summoneth me to my grave, and my soule desirous of his god. fare- well, philautus, and let the tenor of my counsaile be applyed to thy childrens comfort. euphues dying to live. if any man find this scrowle, send it to philautus in england. rosalynde. there dwelled adjoyning to the cittie of bordeaux a knight of most honourable parentage, whome fortune had graced with many favors, and nature honoured with sundry exquisite qualities, so beautified with the excellence of both, as it was a question whether fortune or nature were more prodigall in deciphering the riches of their bounties. wise he was, as holding in his head a supreme con- ceipt of pollicie, reaching with nestor into the depth of all civil governement; and to make his wise.dome more gratious, he had that salem ingenii, and pleasant eloquence that was so highly commended in ulisses: his valour was no lesse then his witte, nor the stroke of his launce no lesse forcible than the sweetnesse of his tongue was perswasive; for he was for his courage chosen the principall of all the knights of malta. this hardy knight thus enricht with vertue and honour, sur- named sir john of burdeux, having the prime of his youth in sundry battailes against the turkes, at last (as the date of time hath his course) grewe aged. his haires were silver hued, and the map of his age was figured on his forhead: honour sate in the furrowes of his face, and many yeares were pourtrayed in his wrinckled lineaments, that all men might perceive his glasse was runne, and that nature of necessitie chalenged her due. sir john (that with the phenix knewe the tearme of his life was now expired, and could, with the swan, discover his end by her songs) having three sonnes by his wife lynida, the very pride of all his forepassed yeares, thought now (seeing death by constraint would compel him to leave them) to bestow upon them such a legacie as might bewray his love, and increase their insuing amitie. calling therefore these yong gentlemen before him, in the presence of eu phues golden legacie. his fellow knights of malta, he resolved to leave them a me- morial of all his fatherly care in setting downe a methode of their brotherly dueties. having therefore death in his lookes to moove them to pittie, and teares in his eyes to paint out the depth of his passions, taking his eldest sonne by the hand, he began thus. sir john of burdeaux legacie he gave to his sonnes. oh my sons, you see that fate hath set a period of my years, and destenies have determined the final ende of my dayes: the palme tree waxeth away ward, for hee stoopeth in his height, and my plumes are ful of sicke feathers touched with age. i must to my grave that dischargeth all cares, and leave you to the world that increaseth many sorrowes: my silver haires conteineth great experience, and in the number of my yeares are pende downe the subtleties of fortune. therefore, as i leave you some fading pelfe to counterchecke povertie, so i will bequeath you infallible precepts that shall lead you unto vertue. first, therefore, unto thee saladyne, the eldest, and therefore the chiefest piller of my house, wherein should bee ingraved as wel the excellency of thy fathers qualities, as the essentiall fortune of his proportion, to thee i give foureteene ploughlands, with all my mannor houses and richest plate. next, unto fernandine i bequeath twelve ploughlands. but, unto rosader, the youngest, i give my horse, my armour, and my launce with sixteene plough- lands; for if the inwarde thoughts be discovered by outward shadows, rosader wil exceed you all in bountie and honour. thus (my sonnes) have i parted in your portions the substance of my wealth, wherein if you be as prodigall to spend as i have beene carefull to get, your friendes wil greeve to see you more wastfull then i was bountifull, and your foes smile that my fal did begin in your excesse. let mine honour be the glasse of your actions, and the fame of my vertues the loadstarre to direct the course of your pilgrimage. eu phues golden legacie. ayme your deedes by my honorable endevours, and shew yourselves siens worthy of so florishing a tree, least, as the birdes halcyones, which exceede in whitenesse, i hatch yong ones that exceed in blacknes. climb not, my sonnes: as- piring pride is a vapour that ascendeth hie, but soone turneth to a smoake; they which stare at the starres stumble upon the stones, and such as gaze at the sunne (unless they be eagle eyed) fal blinde. soare not with the hobbie, least you fal with the larke, nor attempt not with phaeton, least you drowne with icarus. fortune, when shee wils you to flye, tempers your plumes with waxe; and therefore eyther sit stil and make no wing, or else beware the sunne, and hold dedalus axiome authentical (medium tenuere tutissimum.) low shrubs have deepe rootes, and poore cottages great pa- tience. fortune looks ever upward, and envy aspireth to nestle with dignitie. take heed, my sonnes, the meane is sweetest melodie; where strings high stretch, eyther soone cracke, or quickly grow out of tune. let your countryes care be your hearts content, and thinke that you are not borne for your selves, but to levell your thoughts to be loyal to your prince, careful for the common-weale, and faythful to your friendes; so shal fraunce say, these men are as excellent in vertues as they be exquisite in features. oh my sons, a friend is a pretious jewell, within whose bosome you may unload your sorrowes, and unfold your secrets, and he eyther wil releeve with counsaile, or perswade with reason; but take heed in the choyce: the outward shew makes not the inwarde man, nor are the dimples in the face the calenders of truth. when the liquorice leafe looketh most dry, then it is most wet: when the shoares of lepanthus are most quiet, then they forepoint a storme. the baarran leafe the more fayre it lookes, the more infectious it is, and in the sweetest wordes is oft hid most trechery. therefore, my sonnes, chuse a friend as the hiperborei do the mettals, sever them from the ore with fire, and let them not bide the stampe before they be currant: so trie and then trust: let time be the touch- eu phues golden legacie. stone of friendship, and then frends faithful lay them up for jewels. be valiant, my sonnes, for cowardice is the enemy to honour; but not too rash, for that is extreme. fortitude is the meane, and that is limited within bonds, and prescribed with circumstance. but above al, and with that he fetcht a deep sigh, beware of love, for it is farre more perillous then pleasant, and yet, i tel you, it allureth as ill as the syrens. oh my sonnes, fancie is a fickle thing, and beauties paintings are trickt up with times colours, which, being set to drie in the sunne, perish with the same. venus is a wanton, and though her lawes pretend libertie, yet there is nothing but losse and glistering miserie. cupids wings are plumed with the feathers of vanitie, and his arrowes, where they pierce, inforce nothing but deadly destres: a womans eye, as it is pretious to behold, so is it prejudicial to gaze upon; for as it affoordeth delight, so it snareth unto death. trust not theyr fawning favours, for their loves are like the breath of a man uppon steele, which no sooner lighteth on but it leapeth off, and their passions are as momentary as the colours of a polipe, which changeth at the sight of every object. my breath waxeth short, and mine eyes waxeth dimme: the houre is come, and i must away; therefore let this suffice: women are wantons, and yet men cannot want one : and therefore, if you love, choose her that hath eyes of adamant, that wil turne onely to one poynt; her heart of a diamond, that will receive but one forme; her tongue of a sethin leafe, that never wagges, but with a south-east winde: and yet, my sonnes, if she have all these qualities, to be chast, obedient, and silent, yet for that she is a woman, shalt thou finde in her sufficient vanities to countervaile her vertues. oh now, my sonnes, even now take these my last wordes as my latest legacie, for my threed is spunne, and my foot is in the grave. keepe my precepts as memorials of your fathers counsailes, and let them bee lodged in the secrete of your hearts; for wise.dome is better than wealth, and a golden sentence worth a world of treasure. in my fal see and marke, my sonnes, eu phues golden legacie. the folly of man, that being dust climbeth with biares to reatch at the heavens, and ready every minute to dye, yet hopeth for an age of pleasures. oh, mans life is like lightning, that is but a flash, and the longest date of his yeares but as a bavens blaze. seeing then man is so mortal, be careful that thy life be vertuous, that thy death may bee ful of admirable honors: so shalt thou chalenge fame to be thy fautor, and put oblivion to exile with thine honorable actions. but, my sonnes, least you should forget your fathers axiomes, take this scroule, wherein reade what your father dying wils you to execute living. at this hee shrunke downe in his bed, and gave up the ghost. john of bourdeaux being thus dead was greatly lamented of his sonnes, and bewayled of his friends, especially of his fellow knights of malta, who attended on his funerals, which were performed with great solemnitie. his obsequies done, saladyne caused, next his epitaph, the contents of the scroule to bee pourtrayed out, which were to this effect. the contents of the scedule which sir john of bourdeaux gave to his sonnes. my sonnes, behold what portion i do give. i leave you goods, but they are quickly lost: i leave advise, to schoole you how to live : i leave you wit, but wonne with little cost: but keepe it well, for counsaile still is one, when father, friends, and worldly goods are gone. in choice of thrift let honour be your gaine, winne it by vertue and by manly might; in dooing good esteeme thy toyle no paine; protect the fatherlesse and widowes right: fight for thy faith, thy country, and thy king, for why? this thrift wil prove a blessed thing. in choise of wife, preferre the modest chast; lillies are faire in shew, but foule in smell. the sweetest lookes by age are soon defast; then choose thy wife by wit and living well. who brings thee wealth and many faults withall, presents the hony mixt with bitter gall. eu phues golden legaci e. in choise of friends, beware of light beliefe ; a painted tongue may shroud a subtill heart: the syrens teares doe threaten mickle griefe. foresee, my sonnes, for feare of sodaine smart: chuse in your wants, and he that friends you then, when richer growne, befriend you him again. learne with the ant in summer to provide ; drive with the bee the droane from out the hive: buyld lyke the swallow in the summer tyde; spare not too much (my sonnes) but sparing thrive: be poore in folly, rich in all but sinne, so by your death your glory shall beginne. saladyne having thus set up the scedule, and hangd about his fathers hearse many passionate poems, that france might suppose him to be passing sorrowful, hee clad himselfe and his brothers all in black, and in such sable sutes discoursed his griefe: but as the hiena when she mourns is then most guilefull, so saladine under this shewe of griefe shaddowed a heart ful of contented thoughts. the tyger, though he hide his claws, wil at last discover his rapine: the lions looks are not the maps of his meaning, nor a mans phismomie is not the display of his secrets. fire cannot be hid in the straw, nor the nature of man so concealed, but at last it will have his course: nurture and art may do much, but that natura natu- rans, which by propagation is ingrafted in the hart, will be at last perforce predominant according to the olde verse, naturam expellas furca licet, tamen usque recurret. so fares it with saladine, for after a months mourning was past, he fel to consideration of his fathers testament; how hee had bequeathed more to his yoonger brothers than himselfe, that rosader was his fathers darling, but now under his tui- tion, that as yet they were not come to yeares, and he being their gardian, might (if not defraud them of their due) yet make such havocke of theyr legacies and lands, as they should be a great deal the lighter: wherupon he began thus to meditate with himselfe. eu phues golden legacie. saladynes meditation with himselfe. saladyne, how art thou disquieted in thy thoughts, and perplexed with a world of restlesse passions, having thy minde troubled with the tenour of thy fathers testament, and thy heart fiered with the hope of present preferment! by the one thou art counsaild to content thee with thy fortunes, by the other, perswaded to aspire to higher wealth. riches (saladyne) is a great royaltie, and there is no sweeter phi- sick than store. avicen, like a foole, forgot in his apho- rismes to say that gold was the most precious restorative, and that treasure was the most excellent medecine of the minde. oh, saladyne, what, were thy fathers precepts breathed into the winde! hast thou so soone forgotten his prin- ciples' did he not warne thee from coveting without honor, and climing without vertue did he not forbid thee to ayme at any action that should not bee honourable! and what will bee more prejudiciall to thy credite, than the carelesse ruine of thy brothers prosperitie! and wilt thou become the subversion of their fortunes is there any sweeter thing than concord, or a more precious jewel then amitieſ are you not sonnes of one father, siens of one tree, birds of one neast, and wilt thou become so unnaturall as to robbe them, whom thou shouldest relieve " no, saladyne, intreat them with favours, and enter- taine them with love, so shalt thou have thy conscience cleare and thy renowne excellent. tush, what wordes are these ? base foole, farre unfit (if thou be wise) for thy humour. what though thy father at his death talked of many frivilous matters, as one that doted for age and raved in his sicknes, shal his words be axioms, and his talk be so authenticall, that thou wilt (to observe them) prejudice thy selfe! no no, sala- dyne, sicke mens willes, that are parole and have neither hand nor seale, are like the lawes of a cittie written in dust, which are broken with the blast of every winde. what, man, thy father is dead, and hee can neither helpe thy for- eu phues golden legaci e. tunes, nor measure thy actions; therfore bury his words with his carkasse, and be wise for thy selfe. what, tis not so olde as true, non sapit, qui sibi non sapit. thy brother is yoong, keepe him now in awe; make him not checke mate with thy selfe, for nimia familiaritas contemptum parit. let him know litle, so shall he not be able to execute much : suppresse his wittes with a base estate, and though hee be a gentleman by nature, yet forme him anew, and make him a peasant by nourture. so shalt thou keepe him as a slave, and raigne thy selfe sole lord over all thy fathers possessions. as for fernandyne, thy middle brother, he is a scholler and hath no minde but on aristotle: let him reade on galen while thou riflest with golde, and pore on his booke til thou doest purchase landes : witte is great wealth; if he have learning it is enough, and so let all rest, in this humour was saladyne, making his brother rosader his foote boy for the space of two or three yeares, keeping him in such servile subjection, as if he had been the sonne of any country vassal. the young gentleman bare all with patience, til on a day, walking in the garden by himselfe, he began to consider how he was the sonne of john of bour- deaux, a knight renownied for many victories, and a gentle- man famozed for his vertues; how, contrarie to the testament of his father, hee was not only kept from his land and in- treated as a servant, but smothered in such secret slaverie, as hee might not attaine to any honourable actions. as, quoth hee to himselfe (nature woorking these effectuall passions) why should i that am a gentleman borne, passe my time in such unnatural drudgery were it not better either in paris to become a scholler, or in the court a courtier, or in the field eu phufs golden legacie. a souldier, then to live a foote boy to my own brother na- ture hath lent me wit to conceive, but my brother denied mee art to contemplate: i have strength to performe any honor- able exployt, but no libertie to accomplish my vertuous in- devours: those good partes that god hath bestowed upon mee, the envy of my brother doth smother in obscuritie; the harder is my fortune, and the more his frowardnes. with that casting up his hand he felt haire on his face, and per- ceiving his beard to bud for choler hee began to blush, and swore to himselfe he would be no more subject to such slaverie. as thus he was ruminating of his melancholie passions in came saladyne with his men, and seeing his brother in a browne study, and to forget his wonted reverence, thought to shake him out of his dumps thus. sirha (quoth he) what is you heart on your halfepeny, or are you saying a dirge for your fathers soule what, is my dinner readie! at this ques- tion rosader, turning his head ascance, and bending his browes as if anger there had ploughed the furrowes of her wrath, with his eyes full of fire, hee made this replie. doest thou aske mee (saladyne) for thy cates! aske some of thy churles who are fit for suche an office: i am thine equal by nature, though not by birth, and though thou hast more cardes in the bunch, i have as many trumpes in my handes as thy selfe. let me question with thee, why thou hast feld my woods, spoyled my manner houses, and made havocke of suche utensalles as my father bequeathed unto meet i tell thee, saladyne, either answere mee as a brother, or i wil trouble thee as an enemie. at this replie of rosaders saladyne smiled, as laughing at his presumption, and frowned as checking his folly: he ther- fore tooke him up thus shortly : what, sirha, wel i see early pricks the tree that wil proove a thorne: hath my familiar conversing with you made you coy, or my good lookes drawne you to be thus contemptuous ! i can quickly remedie such a fault, and i wil bend the tree while it is a wand. in faith (sir boy) i have a snaffle for such a headstrong colt. eu phues golden legacie. you, sirs, lap holde on him and binde him, and then i wil give him a cooling carde for his choller. this made rosader halfe mad, that stepping to a great rake that stood in the garden, hee laide such loade uppon his brothers men that hee hurt some of them, and made the rest of them run away. saladyne seeing rosader so resolute, and with his resolution so valiant, thought his heeles his best safetie, and tooke him to a loaft adjoyning to the garden, whether rosader pursued him hotlie. saladine, afraide of his brothers furie, cried out to him thus: rosader, be not so rash: i am thy brother and thine elder, and if i have done thee wrong ile make thee amendes: revenge not anger in blood, for so shalt thou staine the vertue of old sir john bourdeaux; say wherein thou art discontent and thou shalt bee satisfied. brothers frownes ought not to be periodes of wrath: what, man, looke not so sowerly; i know we shalbe friendes, and better friends then we have been. for, amantium ira amoris redintegratio est. these wordes appeased the choller of rosader (for he was of a milde and curteous nature) so that hee layde downe his weapons, and upon the faith of a gentleman assured his bro- ther hee would offer him no prejudice: wherupon saladyne came down, and after a little parley they imbraced eache other and became friends; and saladyne promising rosader the restitution of all his lands, and what favour els (quoth he) any waies my ability or the nature of a brother may per- forme, upon these sugred reconciliations they went into the house arme in arme togither, to the great content of all the old servants of sir john of bourdeaux. thus continued the pad hidden in the strawe, til it chaunced that torismond, king of france, had appointed for his pleasure a day of wrastling and of tournament to busie his commons heades, least, being idle, their thoughts should runne uppon more serious matters, and call to remembrance their old banished king. a champion there was to stand against all commers, a norman, a man of tall stature and of great strength; so valiant, that in many such conflicts he alwaies bare away the victorie, not onely eu phues golden legacie. overthrowing them which hee incountred, but often with the weight of his bodie killing them outright. saladyne hearing of this, thinking now not to let the ball fal to the ground, but to take opportunitie by the forehead, first by secret meanes convented with the norman, and procured him with rich rewards to sweare, that if rosader came within his clawes hee would never more returne to quarrel with sala- dyne for his possessions. the norman desirous of pelfe, as (quis nisi mentis inops oblatum respuit aurum) taking great gifts for litle gods, tooke the crownes of saladyne to performe the stratagem. having thus the champion tied to his vilan- ous determination by oath, hee prosecuted the intent of his purpose thus:—he went to yoong rosader (who in all his thoughts reacht at honour, and gazed no lower then vertue commanded him), and began to tel him of this tournament and wrastling, how the king should bee there, and all the chiefe peeres of france, with all the beautiful damosels of the countrey. now, brother (quoth hee) for the honor of sir john of bourdeaux, our renowned father, to famous that house that never hath bin found without men approoved in chivalrie, shewe thy resolution to be peremptorie. for my- selfe thou knowest, though i am eldest by birth, yet never having attempted any deedes of armes, i am yongest to per- forme any martial exploytes, knowing better how to survey my lands then to charge my launce: my brother fernandyne hee is at paris poring on a fewe papers, having more insight into sophistrie and principles of philosophie, then anie war- lyke indeveurs; but thou, rosader, the youngest in yeares but the eldest in valour, art a man of strength, and darest doo what honour allowes thee. take thou my fathers launce, his sword, and his horse, and hye thee to the tournament, and either there valiantly cracke a speare, or trie with the nor- man for the palme of activitie. the words of saladyne were but spurres to a free horse, for hee had scarce uttered them, ere rosader tooke him in his armes, taking his proffer so kindly, that hee promised in what hee might to requite his c eu phues golden legacie. curtesie. the next morrow was the day of the tournament, and rosader was so desirous to shew his heroycal thoughts that he past the night with litle sleep; but assoone as phoebus had valled the curteine of the night, and made aurora blush with giving her the bezoles labres in her silver couch, he gat him up, and taking his leave of his brother, mounted himselfe towardes the place appoynted, thinking every mile ten leagues til he came there. but leaving him so desirous of the journey, to torismond, the king of france, who hav- ing by force banished gerismond, their lawful king that lived as an outlaw in the forest of arden, sought now by all meanes to keep the french busied with all sports that might breed their content. amongst the rest he had appointed this solemne turnament, wherunto hee in most solemne maner resorted, accompanied with the twelve peers of france, who, rather for fear then love, graced him with the shew of their dutiful favours. to feede their eyes, and to make the be- holders pleased with the sight of most rare and glistring ob- jects, he had appoynted his owne daughter alinda to be there, and the fair rosalynd, daughter unto gerismond, with al the beautifull dammoselles that were famous for their features in all france. thus in that place did love and war triumph in a simpa- thy; for such as were martial might use their launce to be renowned for the excellency of their chevalrie, and suche as were amorous might glut themselves with gazing on the beauties of most heavenly creatures. as every mans eye had his several survey, and fancie was partial in their lookes, yet all in general applauded the admirable riches that nature bestowed on the face of rosalynde; for uppon her cheekes there seemed a battaile betweene the graces, who should be- stow most favours to make her excellent. the blush that gloried luna, when she kist the shepheard on the hilles of latmos, was not tainted with such a pleasant dye, as the ver- milion flourisht on the silver hue of rosalyndes countenance: her eyes were lyke those lampes that make the wealthie euphues golden legacie. covert of the heavens more gorgious, sparkling favour and disdaine; courteous and yet coye, as if in them venus had placed all her amorets, and diana all her chastitie. the tra- melles of her hayre, foulded in a call of golde, so farre surpast the burnisht glister of the mettal, as the sunne doth the meanest starre in brightnesse: the tresses that foldes in the browes of apollo were not halfe so rich to the sight, for in her hayres it seemed love had laide herselfe in ambush, to intrappe the proudest eye that durst gaze uppon their excellence. what should i neede to decipher her particular beauties, when by the censure of all shee was the paragon of all earthly perfection? this rosalynd sat, i say, with alinda as a be- holder of these sportes, and made the cavaliers cracke their lances with more courage: many deedes of knighthood that day were performed, and many prizes were given according to their several desertes. at last when the tournament ceased, the wrastling beganne, and the norman presented himselfe as a chalenger against all commers, but hee looked lyke hercules when he advaunst himselfe agaynst achelotis, so that the furie of his countenaunce amazed all that durst at- tempte to incounter with him in any deed of activitie: til at last a lustie francklin of the country came with two tall men, that were his sonnes, of good lyniaments and comely personage: the eldest of these dooing his obeysance to the king entered the lyst, and presented himselfe to the norman, who straight coapt with him, and as a man that would tri- umph in the glorie of his strength, roused himselfe with such furie, that not onely hee gave him the fall, but killed him with the weight of his corpulent personage; which the yoonger brother seeing, lepte presently into the place, and thirstie after the revenge, assayled the norman with such valour, that at the first incounter hee brought him to his knees: which repulst so the norman, that recovering him- selfe, feare of disgrace doubling his strength, hee stept so stearnely to the yoong francklin, that taking him up in his armes hee threw him against the grounde so violently, that hee c eu phues golden legacie. broake his necke, and so ended his dayes with his brother. at this unlookt for massacre the people murmured, and were all in a deepe passion of pittie; but the franklin, father unto these, never chaunged his countenance, but as a man of a cou- ragious resolution tooke up the bodies of his sonnes without shewe of outward discontent. all this while stood rosader and sawe this tragedie; who, noting the undoubted vertue of the francklins minde, alight- ed of from his horse, and presently sat downe on the grasse, and commanded his boy to pul off his bootes, making him ready to try the strength of this champion. being furnished as he would, he clapt the francklin on the shoulder and said thus. bold yeoman, whose sonnes have ended the tearme of their yeares with honour, for that i see thou scornest fortune with patience, and thwartest the injury of fate with content in brooking the death of thy sonnes, stand awhile, and either see me make a third in their tragedie, or else revenge their fal with an honourable triumph. the francklin, seeing so goodly a gentleman to give him such curteous comfort, gave him hartie thankes, with promise to pray for his happy suc- cesse. with that rosader vailed bonnet to the king, and lightly leapt within the lists, where noting more the companie then the combatant, he cast his eye upon the troupe of ladies that glistered there lyke the starres of heaven; but at last love willing to make him as amourous as hee was valiant, presented him with the sight of rosalynd, whose admirable beautie so inveagled the eye of rosader, that forgetting him- selfe, hee stood and fedde his lookes on the favour of rosalyndes face; which shee perceiving, blusht, which was such a doubling of her beauteous excellence, that the bashful redde of aurora at the sight of unacquainted phaeton, was not halfe so glorious. the normane seeing this young gentleman fettered in the lookes of the ladyes drave him out of his memento with a shake by the shoulder. rosader looking backe with an an- grie frowne, as if hee had been wakened from some pleasaunt eu phues golden legacie. dreame, discovered to all by the furye of his countenance that hee was a man of some high thoughts: but when they all noted his youth, and the sweetnesse of his visage, with a general applause of favours, they grieved that so goodly a yoong man should venture in so base an action; but seeing it were to his dishonour to hinder him from his enterprise, they wisht him to bee graced with the palme of victorie. after rosader was thus called out of his memento by the norman, he roughly clapt to him with so fierce an incounter, that they both fel to the ground, and with the violence of the fal were forced to breathe : in which space the norman called to minde by all tokens, that this was hee whome saladyne had appoynted him to kil; which conjecture made him stretch every limbe, and try every sinew, that working his death hee might recover the golde which so bountifuly was promised him. on the contrary part, rosader while he breathed was not idle, but stil cast his eye upon rosalynde, who to in- courage him with a favour, lent him such an amorous looke, as might have made the most coward desperate: which glance of rosalynd so fiered the passionate desires of rosader, that turning to the noman hee ranne upon him and braved him with a strong encounter. the norman received him as valiantly, that there was a sore combat, hard to judge on whose side fortune would be prodigal. at last rosader, calling to minde the beautie of his new mistresse, the fame of his fathers honours, and the disgrace that should fal to his house by his misfortune, rowsed himselfe and threw the nor- man against the ground, falling uppon his chest with so will- ing a weight, that the norman yelded nature her due, and rosader the victorie. *- the death of this champion, as it highly contented the francklin, as a man satisfied with revenge, so it drue the king and all the peeres into a great admiration, that so yoong yeares and so beautiful a personage should contain such martiall excellence; but when they knew him to bee the yoongest sonne of sir john of bourdeaux, the king rose from eu phues golden legacie. his seat and imbraced him, and the peeres intreated him with all favourable curtesie, commending both his valour and his vertues, wishing him to go forward in such haughtie deeds, that hee might attaine to the glory of his fathers honour- able fortunes. as the king and lordes graced him with embracyng, so the ladyes favoured him with theyr lookes, especially rosalynd, whome the beautie and valour of rosader had already touched: but she accounted love a toye, and fancie a momen- tary passion, that as it was taken in with a gaze, might be shaken off with a winke, and therefore feared not to dally in the flame; and to make rosader know she affected him, tooke from her necke a jewel, and sent it by a page to the yong gentleman. the prize that venus gave to paris was not halfe so pleasing to the trojan as this jemme was to rosader; for if fortune had sworne to make himself sole monarke of the world, he would rather have refused such dignitie, then have lost the jewel sent him by rosalynd. to return hir with the like he was unfurnished, and yet that he might more than in his lookes discover his affections, hee stept into a tent, and taking pen and paper writ this fancie:— two sunnes at once from one faire heaven there shinde, ten braunches from two boughes tipt, all with roses, pure lockes more golden than is golde refinde, two pearled rowes that natures pride incloses; two mounts faire marble white, downe-soft and dainty, a snow died orbe, where love increast by pleasure full wofull makes my heart, and body faintie: hir faire (my woe) exceeds all thought and measure. in lines confusde my lucklesse harme appeareth, whom sorrow clowdes, whom pleasant smiling cleareth. this sonnet he sent to rosalynd, which when she read shee blusht, but with a sweet content in that she perceived love had alotted her so amorous a servant. leaving her to her intertained fancies, againe to rosader, who triumphing in the glorie of this conquest, accompanyed with a troupe of eu phues golden legacie. yoong gentlemen that were desirous to be his familiars, went home to his brother saladynes, who was walking before the gates, to heare what successe his brother rosader should have, assuring himself of his death, and devising how with dis- simuled sorrowe to celebrate his funerals. as he was in his thought, he cast up his eye, and sawe where rosader re- turned with the garland on his head, as having won the prize, accompanied with a crue of boon companions: greeved at this, he stepped in and shut the gate. rosader seeing this, and not looking for such unkind entertainment, blusht at the disgrace, and yet smothering his griefe with a smile, he turned to the gentlemen, and desired them to hold his brother excused, for he did not this upon any malitious intent or ni- gardize, but being brought up in the country, he absented himselfe as not finding his nature fit for such youthful com- pany. thus he sought to shadow abuses proffered him by his brother, but in vaine, for hee could by no meanes be suf- fered to enter: wherupon he ran his foot against the doore, and brake it open, drawing his sword, and entering boldly into the hall, where he found none (for all were fled) but one adam spencer, an english man, who had beene an old and trustie servant to sir john of bourdeaux. he for the love hee bare to his deceased maister, favored the part of rosader, and gave him and his such entertainment as he could. ro- sader gave him thanks, and looking about, seeing the hall empty, saide, gentlemen, you are welcome; frolike and be merry: you shall be sure to have wine enough, whatsoever your fare be. i telyou, cavaliers, my brother hath in his house five tunne of wine, and as long as that lasteth, ibeshrew him that spares his lyquor. with that he burst open the buttery doore, and with the helpe of adam spencer covered the tables, and set downe whatsoever he could find in the house; but what they wanted in meat, was supplyed with drinke, yet had they royall cheare, and withal such hartie welcome as would have made the coursest meats seeme delicates. after they had feasted and frolickt it twise or thrise with eu phues golden legacie. an upsey freeze, they all tooke leave of rosader and departed. assoone as they were gone, rosader growing impatient of the abuse, drewe his sword, and swore to be revenged on the discourteous saladyne; yet by the meanes of adam spencer, who sought to continue friendshippe and amity betwixt the brethren, and through the flattering submission of saladyne, they were once againe reconciled, and put up all forepassed injuries with a peaceable agreement, living together for a good space in such brotherly love, as did not onely rejoice the servantes, but made all the gentlemen and bordering neigh- bours glad of such friendly concord. saladyne, hiding fire in the straw, and concealing a poysoned hate in a peaceable countenance, yet deferring the intent of his wrath till fitter oportunity, he shewed himselfe a great favorer of his bro- thers vertuous endevors: where, leaving them in this happy league, let us returne to rosalynd. rosalynd returning home from the tryumph, after she waxed solitary love presented her with the idea of rosaders perfection, and taking her at discovert stroke her so deepe, as she felte her selfe grow passing passionate. shee began to cal to minde the comlinesse of his person, the honor of his parents, and the vertues that, excelling both, made him so gra- tious in the eies of every one. sucking in thus the hony of love by imprinting in her thoughts his rare qualities, shee began to surfet with the contemplation of his vertuous condi- tions; but when she cald to remembrance her present estate, and the hardnesse of her fortunes, desire began to shrink, and fancie to vale bonnet, that betweene a chaos of confused thoughts she began to debate with herselfe in this maner. rosalynds passion. infortunate rosalynde, whose misfortunes are more than thy yeares, and whose passions are greater then thy patience the blossoms of thy youth are mixt with the frosts of envy, and the hope of thy ensuing fruits perish in the bud. thy eu phues golden legacie. father is by torismond banisht from the crown, and thou, the unhappy daughter of a king detained captive, living as dis- quieted in thy thoughts, as thy father discontented in his exile. ah rosalynd, what cares wait upon a crown! what griefs are incident to dignity what sorrows haunt royal pallaces ! the greatest seas have the sorest stormes, the highest birth subject to the most bale, and of all trees the cedars soonest shake with the wind : smal currents are ever calme, lowe valleys not scorcht in any lightnings, nor base men tyed to anie baleful prejudice. fortune flies, and if she touch poverty it is with hir heele, rather disdaining their want with a frown, then envying their welth with disparagement. oh rosalynd, hadst thou beene born low, thou hadst not falne so high, and yet beeing great of blood thine honour is more, if thou brookest misfortune with patience. suppose i contrary fortune with content, yet fates unwilling to have me any waies happy, have forced love to set my thoughts on fire with fancie. love, rosalynd! becommeth it women in dis- tresse to thinke on love! tush, desire hath no respect of persons: cupid is blind and shooteth at random, assoone hitting a ragge as a robe, and piercing assoone the bosome of a captive, as the brest of a libertine. thou speakest it, poore rosalynd, by experience; for being every way distrest, sur- charged with cares, and overgrowne with sorrowes, yet amidst the heape of all these mishaps, love hath lodged in thy heart the perfection of yong rosader, a man every way absolute as wel for his inward life, as for his outward lynia- ments, able to content the eye with beauty, and the eare with the report of his vertue. but consider, rosalynde, his fortunes, and thy present estate: thou art poore and without patrymony, and yet the daughter of a prince; he a yonger brother, and voyd of such possessions as eyther might main- taine thy dignities or revenge thy fathers injuries. and hast thou not learned this of other ladies, that lovers cannot live by looks! that womens ears are sooner content with a pound of give me, then a dram of heare me ! that gold is eu phues golden legacie. sweeter than eloquence? that love is a fire, and wealth is the fewell that venus coffer should be ever ful! then, rosalynd, seeing rosader is poore, thinke him lesse beautiful, because hee is in want, and account his vertues but qualities of course, for that he is not indued with wealth. doth not horace tell thee what methode is to be used in love! querenda pecunia primum, post nummos virtus. tush, rosalynd, be not over rash: leape not before thou looke: either love such a one as may with his landes purchase thy libertie, or els love not at all. chuse not a faire face with an empty purse, but say as most women use to say, sinihil attuleris, ibis homere foras. why, rosalynd, can such base thoughts harbour in such high beauties? can the degree of a princesse, the daughter of gerismond harbour such servile conceites, as to prize gold more than honour, or to measure a gentleman by his wealth, not by his vertues no, rosalynd, blush at thy base resolu- tion, and say, if thou lovest, eyther rosader or none. and why? because rosader is both beautiful and vertuous. smiling to her selfe to thinke of her new intertained passions, taking up her lute that lay by her, she warbled out this dittie. rosalynds madrigall. love in my bosome like a bee doth sucke his sweete: now with his wings he playes with me, now with his feete. within mine eyes he makes his nest, his bed amidst my tender brest: my kisses are his dayly feast, and yet he robs me of my rest. ah, wanton, will ye? eu phues golden legacie. and if i sleepe, then pearcheth he with pretty flight, and makes his pillow of my knee the livelong night. strike i my lute, he tunes the string; he musicke playes if so i sing. he lends me every lovely thing, yet cruell he my heart doth sting: whist, wanton, still ye! else i with roses every day will whip you hence, and binde you, when you long to play, for your offence. ile shut mine eyes to keep you in, ile make you fast it for your sinne, ile count your power not worth a pinne. alas, what hereby shall i winne, if he gainsay me? what if i beate the wanton boy with many a rod? he wil repay me with annoy, because a god. then sit thou safely on my knee, and let thy bower my bosome be; lurke in mine eies, i like of thee, o cupid, so thou pittie me, spare not but play thee. scarce had rosalynde ended her madrigale, before toris- mond came in with his daughter alinda and many of the peers of france, who were enamoured of her beauty; which torismond perceiving, fearing least her perfection might be the beginning of his prejudice, and the hope of his fruit ende in the beginning of her blossomes, he thought to banish her from the court: for, quoth he to himselfe, her face is so ful of favour, that it pleads pittie in the eye of every man: her beauty is so heavenly and devine, that she wil prove to me as helen did to priam: some one of the peeres wil ayme at her love, end the marriage, and then in his wives right at- tempt the kingdome. to prevent therefore had i wist in eu phues golden legacie. all these actions, shee tarryes not about the court, but shall (as an exile) eyther wander to her father, or else seeke other fortunes. in this humour, with a sterne countenance ful of wrath, he breathed out this censure unto her before the peers, that charged her that that night shee were not seene about the court: for (quoth he) i have heard of thy aspiring speeches, and intended treasons. this doome was strange unto rosa- lynd, and presently covred with the shield of her innocence, she boldly brake out in reverent tearms to have cleared her- self; but torismond would admit of no reason, nor durst his lords plead for rosalynd, although her beauty had made some of them passionate, seeing the figure of wrath pourtrayed in his brow. standing thus all mute, and rosalynd amazed, alinda, who loved her more than herself, with grief in her hart and teares in her eyes, falling down on her knees, began to intreat her father thus. alindas oration to her father in defence of rosalynde. if (mighty torismond) i offend in pleading for my friend, let the law of amitie crave pardon for my boldnesse; for where there is depth of affection, there friendship alloweth a priviledge. rosalynd and i have beene fostered up from our infancies, and noursed under the harbour of our conversing togeather with such private familiarities, that custome had wrought an unyon of our nature, and the sympathie of our affections such a secret love, that we have two bodies and one soule. then marvell not (great torismond) if, seeing my friend distrest, i finde myselfe perplexed with a thousand sorrowes; for her vertuous and honourable thoughts (which are the glories that maketh women excellent) they be such as may challenge love, and race out suspition. her obedience to your majestie i referre to the censure of your owne eye, that since her fathers exile hath smothered al griefs with pa- tience, and in the absence of nature, hath honored you with all euphues golden legacie. dutie, as her owne father by nouriture, not in word uttering any discontent, nor in thought as (far as conjecture may reach) hammering on revenge; only in all her actions seeking to please you, and to win my favor. her wisdome, silence, chas- titie, and other such rich qualities, ineed not decypher; onely it rests for me to conclude in one word, that she is innocent. if then, fortune who tryumphs in variety of miseries, hath pre- sented some envious person (as minister of her intended stra- tagem) to tainte rosalynde with any surmise of treason, let him be brought to her face, and confirme his accusation by witnesses; which proved, let her die, and alinda wil execute the massacre. if none can avouch any confirmed relation of her intent, use justice, my lord, it is the glory of a king, and let her live in your wonted favour; for if you banish her, myselfe, as copartner of her harde fortunes, will participate in exile some part of her extremities. torismond (at this speech of alinda) covered his face with such a frown, as tyranny seemed to sit triumphant in his forhead, and checkt her up with such taunts, as made the lords (that only were hearers) to tremble. proud girle (quoth he) hath my looks made thee so light of toong, or my favours incouraged thee to bee so forward, that thou darest presume to preach after thy father hath not my yeares more experi- ence than thy youth, and the winter of mine age deeper in- sight into civil policie, than the prime of thy florishing dayes! the olde lion avoides the toyles, where the yoong one leapes into the nette: the care of age is provident and foresees much: suspition is a vertue, where a man holdes his enemie in his bosome. thou, fond girle, measurest all by present affection, and as thy heart loves, thy thoughts cen- sure; but if thou knowest that in liking rosalynd thou hatchest up a bird to pecke out thine owne eyes, thou wouldst intreat as much for hir absence as now thou delightest in her presence. but why doe i alleadge policie to thee! sit you downe, huswife, and fall to your needle: if idlenes make you so wanton, or libertie so malipert, i can quickly tye you to a eu phues golden legacie. sharper taske. and you (mayd) this night be packing, eyther into arden to your father, or whither best it shall content your humour, but in the court you shall not abide. this rigorous replie of torismond nothing amazed alinda, for stil she prosecuted her plea in the defence of rosalynd, wishing her father (if his censure might not be reverst) that he would appoynther partner of her exile; which if he refused, eyther she would by some secret meanes steale out and followe her, or else ende her dayes with some desperate kind of death. when torismond heard his daughter so resolute, his heart was so hardened against her, that he set down a definitive and peremptory sentence, that they should both be banished, which presently was done, the tyrant rather choosing to hazard the losse of his onely child than any wayes to put in question the state of his kingdome; so suspitious and fearfull is the conscience of an usurper. wel, although his lords perswaded him to retaine his owne daughter, yet his resolu- tion might not be reverst, but both of them must away from the court without eyther more company or delay. in hee went with great melancholy, and left these two ladyes alone. rosalynd waxed very sad, and sate downe and wept. alinda she smiled, and sitting by her friend began thus to comfort her. alindas comfort to perplexed rosalynd. why how now, rosalynd, dismayd with a frowne of con- trary fortune? have i not oft heard thee say, that hygh mindes were discovered in fortunes contempt, and heroycal seene in the depth of extremities? thou wert wont to tel others that complained of distresse, that the sweetest salve for misery was patience, and the onely medicine for want that pretious implaister of content. being such a good phisi- tion to others, wilt thou not minister receipts to thy selfe' but perchance thou wilt say, consulenti nunquam caput doluit. eu phues golden legacie. why then, if the patients that are sicke of this disease can finde in themselves neither reason to perswade, nor art to cure, yet (rosalynd) admit of the counsaile of a friend, and applie the salves that may appease thy passions. if thou grievest that being the daughter of a prince, and envy thwarteth thee with such hard exigents, thinke that royaltie is a faire marke, that crowns have crosses when mirth is in cottages; that the fairer the rose is, the sooner it is bitten with caterpillers; the more orient the pearle is, the more apt to take a blemish; and the greatest birth, as it hath most honour, so it hath much envy. if then fortune aymeth at the fairest, be patient rosalynd, for first by thine exile thou goest to thy father: nature is higher prised then wealth, and the love of ones parents ought to bee more pretious then all dignities. why then doth my rosalynd grieve at the frowne of torismond, who by offering her a prejudice proffers her a greater pleasure! and more (mad lasse) to be melancholy, when thou hast with thee alinda, a friend who wil be a faithful copartner of althy misfortunes; who hath left her father to follow thee, and chooseth rather to brooke al ex- tremities then to forsake thy presence. what, rosalynd, solamen miseris socios habuisse doloris. cheerly, woman: as wee have been bedfellowes in royaltie, we wil be felow mates in povertie: i wil ever be thy alinda, and thou shalt ever rest to me rosalynd; so shall the world canonize our friendship, and speake of rosalynd and alinda, as they did of pilades and orestes. and if ever fortune smile, and we returne to our former honour, then folding our selves in the sweete of our friendship, we shal merily say (calling to mind our forepassed miseries) olim haec meminisse juvabit. at this rosalynd began to comfort her, and after shee had wept a fewe kinde teares in the bosome of her alinda, shee eu phufs golden legacie. gave her heartie thankes, and then they sat them downe to consult how they should travel. alinda grieved at nothing but that they might have no man in their company, saying, it would bee their greatest prejudice in that two women went wandring without either guide or attendant. tush (quoth rosalynd) art thou a woman, and hast not a sodeine shift to prevent a misfortune i (thou seest) am of a tall stature, and would very wel become the person and apparel of a page: thou shalt bee my mistresse, and i wil play the man so properly, that (trust me) in what company so ever i come i wil not be discovered. i will buy me a suite, and have my rapier very handsomly at my side, and if any knave offer wrong, your page wil shew him the poynt of his weapon. at this alinda smiled, and upon this they agreed, and presently gathered up al their jewels, which they trussed up in a casket, and rosalynd in all hast pro- vided her of robes; and alinda being called aliena, and rosalynd ganimede, they traveiled along the vineyardes, and by many by-waies, at last got to the forrest side, where they traveiled by the space of two or three dayes without seeing anye creature, being often in danger of wilde beasts, and payned with many passionate sorrowes. now the black oxe began to tread on their feet, and alinda thought of her wonted royaltie; but when she cast her eyes on her rosalynd, she thought every daunger a step to honour. passing thus on along, about midday they came to a fountaine, compast with groave of cipresse trees, so cunningly and curiously planted, as if some goddesse had intreated nature in that place to make her an arbour. by this fountaine sat aliena and her ganimede, and forth they pulled such victuals as they had, and fedde as merely as if they had been in paris with all the kings delicates, aliena onely grieving that they could not so much as meete with a shepheard to discourse them the way to some place where they might make their abode. at last ganimede casting up his eye espied where on a tree was ingraven certaine verses; which assoone as he espied, eu phues golden legacie. he cryed out, be of good cheare, mistresse: i spie the figures of men; for heere in these trees bee ingraven certaine verses of shepheards, or some other swaines that inhabite here about. with that aliena start up joyful to hear these newes, and looked, where they found carved in the barke of a pine tree this passion. montanus passion. hadst thou been borne wher as perpetuall cold makes tanais hard, and mountaines silver old: had i complainde unto a marble stone, or to the flouds bewraide my bitter mone, i then could beare the burthen of my griefe : but even the pride of countries at thy birth, whilste heavens did smile, did new aray the earth with flowers chiefe; yet thou, the flower of beautie blessed borne, hast pretie lookes, but all attirde in scorne. had i the power to weep sweet mirrhas teares, or by my plaints to pearce repining eares: hadst thou the heart to smile at my complaint, to scorne the woes that doth my hart attaint, i then could beare the burthen of my griefe: but not my teares, but truth with thee prevailes, and seeming sowre my sorowes thee assailes: yet small releife; for if thou wilt thou art of marble hard, and if thou please my suite shall soone be heard. no doubt (quoth aliena) this poesie is the passion of some perplexed shepheard, that being enamoured of some faire and beautifull shepheardesse, suffered some sharpe repulse, and therfore complained of the crueltie of his mistresse. you may see (quoth ginimede) what mad cattel you women be, whose harts sometimes are made of adamant that wil touch with no impression, and sometime of wax that is fit for every forme: they delight to be courted, and then they glory d eu phues golden legacie. to seeme coy, and when they are most desired then they freese with disdaine: and this fault is so common to the sex, that you see it painted out in the shepheardes passions, who found his mistres as froward as he was enamoured. and i pray you (quoth aliena) if your robes were off, what mettal are you made of that you are so satyrical against women? is it not a foule bird defiles his own nest? beware (ganimede) that rosader heare you not, if hee doe, perchance you wil make him leape so farre from love, that he wil anger every vaine in your heart. thus (quoth ganimede) i keepe deco- rum: i speak now as i am aliena's page, not as i am geris- monds daughter; for put mee but into a peticoat, and i wil stand in defiance to the uttermost, that women are curteous, constant, vertuous, and what not. stay there (quoth aliena) and no more words, for yonder be caracters graven uppon the barke of the tall beech tree. let us see (quoth ganimede); and with that they read a fancy written to this effect. first shall the heavens want starry light, the seas be robbed of their waves, the day want sunne, and sunne want bright, the night want shade, the dead mens graves; the april flowers, and leafe, and tree, before i false my faith to thee. first shall the tops of highest hils by humble plaines be overpride; and poets scorne the muses quils, and fish forsake the water glide, and iris loose her coloured weed, before i faile thee at thy need. first direful hate shall turne to peace, and love relent in deepe disdaine, and poets scorne the muses quils, and fish forsake the water glide. and iris loose her coloured weed, before i faile thee at thy need. eu phues golden legacie. first direfull hate shall turn to peace, and love relent in deep disdain, and death his fatall stroake shall cease, and envy pitie every paine; and pleasure mourn and sorow smile, before i talke of any guile. first time shall stay his staylesse race, and winter blesse his browes with corne; and snow bemoysten julies face, and winter spring, and summer mourn, before my pen, by helpe of fame, cease to recite thy sacred name. mont anus. no doubt (quoth ganimede) this protestation grew from one full of passions. i am of that minde too (quoth aliena) but see, i pray, when poore women seeke to keepe themselves chaste, how men woo them with many fained promises; al- luring with sweet words as the syrens, and after prooving as trothlesse as aeneas. thus promised demophoon to his phillis, but who at last grew more false? the reason was (quoth ganimede) that they were womens sonnes, and tooke that fault of their mother, for if man had growne from man, as adam did from the earth, men had never been troubled with inconstancie. leave off (quoth aliena) to taunt thus bit- terly, or els ile pull off your pages apparell, and whip you (as venus doth her wantons) with nettles. so you will (quoth ganimede) perswade mee to flattery, and that needs not; but come (seeing we have found here by this fount the tract of shepheardes by their madrigalles and roundelaies) let us forwarde; for either wee shall finde some foldes, sheep- coates, or els some cottages wherin for a day or two to rest. content (quoth aliena) and with that they rose up, and marched forward till towards the even, and then comming into a faire valley (compassed with mountaines, whereon grew many pleasaunt shrubbes) they descrie where two flockes of sheepe did feed. then, looking about, they might perceive where an old shepheard sate (and with him a yoong swaine) d euphues golden legacie. / under a covert most pleasantly scituated. the ground where they sate was diapred with floras riches, as if she ment to wrap tellus in the glorie of her vestments: round about in the forme of an amphitheater were most curiously planted pine trees, interseamed with lymons and cytrons, which with the thicknesse of their boughes so shadowed the place, that phoebus could not prie into the secret of that arbour; so united were the tops with so thick a closure, that venus might there in her jollitie have dallied unseene with her deer- est paramour. fast by (to make the place more gorgious) was there a fount so christalline and cleare, that it seemed diana with her driades and hemadriades had that spring, as the secret of all their bathings. in this glorious arbour satte these two shepheardes (seeing their sheepe feede) play- ing on their pipes many pleasant tunes, and from musicke and melodie falling into much amorous chat. drawing more nigh we might descry the countenance of the one to be full of sorrow, his face to bee the very pourtraiture of discontent, and his eyes full of woes, that living he seemed to dye; we (to heare what these were) stole privily behinde the thicke, where we overheard this discourse. a pleasant eglog between montanus and coridon. ſr. coridon. say, shepheards boy, what makes thee greet so sore? why leaves thy pipe his pleasure and delight? yoong are thy yeares, thy cheeks with roses dight: then sing for joy (sweet swain) and sigh no more. this milk-white poppy, and this climbing pine both promise shade; then sit thee downe and sing, and make these woods with pleasant notes to ring, till phoebus daine all westward to decline. fu phu es golden legaci e. montanus. ah (coridon) unmeet is melody to him whom proud contempt hath overborn: slain are my joyes by phoebus bitter scorn; far hence my weale, and nere my jeopardy. loves burning brand is couched in my breast, making a phoenix of my faintfull hart: and though his fury doo inforce my smart, ay blyth am i to honour his behest. preparde to woes, since so my phoebe wils, my lookes dismaid, since phoebe will disdain; i banish blisse and welcome home my pain: so stream my teares as showers from alpine hils. in errors maske i blindfold judgements eye, i fetter reason in the snares of lust, i seeme secure, yet know not how to trust; i live by that which makes me living dye. devoyd of rest, companion of distresse, plague to myselfe, consumed by my thought, how may my voyce or pipe in tune be brought, since i am reft of solace and delight? coridon. ah, lorrell lad, what makes thee herry love? a sugred harme, a poyson full of pleasure, a painted shrine full-fild with rotten treasure; a heaven in shew, a hell to them that prove. a gaine in seeming, shadowed stil with want, a broken staffe which follie doth upholde, a flower that fades with everie frostie colde, an orient rose sprong from a withred plant. a minutes joy to gaine a world of griefe, a subtil net to snare the idle minde, a seeing scorpion, yet in seeming blinde, a poore rejoice, a plague without reliefe. eu phues golden legacie. for thy, montanus, follow mine arreede, (whom age hath taught the traines that fancy useth) leave foolish love, for beautie wit abuseth, and drownes (by folly) vertues springing seede. montanus. so blames the childe the flame, because it burnes, and bird the snare, because it doth intrap, and fooles true love, because of sorry hap, and saylers cursse the ship that overturnes. but would the childe forbeare to play with flame, and birds beware to trust the flowlers gin, and fooles foresee before they fall and sin, and maisters guide their ships in better frame; the childe would praise the fire, because it warmes, and birds rejoyce to see the fowler faile, and fooles prevent before their plagues prevaile, and saylers blesse the barke that saves from harmes. ah, coridon, though many be thy yeares, and crooked elde hath some experience left, yet is thy mind of judgement quite bereft, in view of love, whose power in me appeares. the ploughman litle wots to turn the pen, or bookeman skils to guide the ploughmans cart; nor can the cobler count the tearmes of art, nor base men judge the thoughts of mighty men. nor withered age (unmeet for beauties guide, uncapable of loves impression) discourse of that whose choyce possession may never to so base a man be tied. but i (whom nature makes of tender mold, and youth most pliant yeelds to fancies fire) do build my haven and heaven on sweet desire, on sweet desire, more deere to me than gold. thinke i of love, o, how my lines aspire how hast the muses to imbrace my browes, and hem my temples in with lawrell bowes, and fill my braines with chast and holy fire! eu phues golden legacie. then leave my lines their homely equipage, mounted beyond the circle of the sunne: amazed i read the stile when i have done, and herry love that sent that heavenly rage. of phoebe then, of phoebe then i sing, drawing the puritie of all the spheares, the pride of earth, or what in heaven appeares, her honoured face and fame to light to bring. in fluent numbers, and in pleasant vaines, i robbe both sea and earth of all their state, to praise her parts: i charme both time and fate, to bless the nymph that yeelds me love sicke paines. my sheepe are turnd to thoughts, whom froward will guydes in the restles laborynth of love; feare lends them pasture whereso ere they move, and by their death their life renueth still. my sheephooke is my pen, mine oaten reed my paper, where my many woes are written. thus silly swaine (with love and fancie bitten) i trace the plaines of paine in wofull weed. yet are my cares, my broken sleepes, my teares, my dreames, my doubts, for phoebe sweet to me: who wayteth heaven in sorrowes vale must be, and glory shines where daunger most appeares. then, coridon, although i blith me not, blame me not, man, since sorrow is my sweet : so willeth love, and phoebe thinkes it meet, and kind montanus liketh well his lot. coridon. oh, staylesse youth, by errour so misguided, where will proscribeth lawes to perfect wits, where reason mournes, and blame in triumph sits, and folly poysoneth all that time provided ! eu phues golden legacie. with wilfull blindnesse bleard, prepard to shame, prone to neglect occasion when she smiles: alas, that love, by fond and froward guiles, should make thee tract the path to endlesse blame! ah (my montanus) cursed is the charme, that hath bewitched so thy youthfull eyes. leave off in time to like these vanities, be forward to thy good, and fly thy harme. as many bees as hibla daily shields, as many frie as fleet on oceans face; as many heards as on the earth do trace, as many flowers as decke the fragrant fields: as many stars as glorious heaven contains, as many storms as wayward winter weepes, as many plagues as hell inclosed keepes, so many griefs in love, so many pains. suspitions, thoughts, desires, opinions, prayers, mislikes, misdeedes, fond joies, and fained peace, illusions, dreames, great paines, and small increase, vowes, hope, acceptance, scorns, and deepe despaires; truce, warre, and wo do wait at beauties gate; time lost, laments, reports, and privy grudge, and lust: fierce love is but a partiall judge, who yeelds for service shame, for friendship hate. montanus. all adder-like i stop mine eares (fond swaine) so charm no more, for i will never change. call home thy flocks betime that stragling range, for loe, the sunne declineth hence amaine. terentius. in amore haec insunt vitia: induciae, inimicitiae, bellum, pax rursum : incerta haec si tu postules, ratione certa fieri nihilo plus agas, quam fides operam, ut cum ratione insanias. eu phues golden legaci e. the shepheards having thus ended their eglogue, aliena stept with ganimede from behind the thicket; at whose sodayne sight the shepheards arose, and aliena saluted them thus: shepheards, all haile (for such wee deeme you by your flockes) and lovers, good lucke, (for such you seeme by your passions) our eyes being witnesse of the one, and our eares of the other. although not by love, yet by fortune, i am a dis- tressed gentlewoman, as sorrowfull as you are passionate, and as full of woes as you of perplexed thoughts. wandring this way in a forrest unknown, onely i and my page, wearied with travel, would faine have some place of rest. may you appoint us any place of quiet harbour (bee it never so meane) i shall bee thankfull to you, contented in my selfe, and gratefull to whosoever shall be mine host. coridon, hearing the gentle- woman spéake so courteously, returned her mildly and re- verently this answere. faire mistresse, wee returne you as hearty a welcome as you gave us a courteous salute. a shepheard i am, and this a lover, as watchful to please his wench as to feed his sheep: ful of fancies, and therefore, say i, full of follyes. exhort him i may, but perswade him i cannot; for love ad- mits neither of counsaile nor reason. but leaving him to his passions, if you be distrest, i am sorrowfull such a faire creature is crost with calamitie: pray for you i may, but releeve you i cannot. marry, if you want lodging, if you vouch to shrowd your selves in a shepheards cottage, my house for this night shall be your harbour. aliena thankt coridon greatly, and presently sate her downe and ganimede by hir, coridon looking earnestly upon her, and with a curious survey view- ing all her perfections applauded (in his thought) her excel- lence, and pitying her distresse was desirous to heare the cause of her misfortunes, began to question her thus. if i should not (faire damosell) occasionate offence, or renew your griefs by rubbing the scar, i would faine crave so much favour as to know the cause of your misfortunes, and why, and whither you wander with your page in so dan- eu phues golden legacie. gerous forest! aliena (that was as courteous as she was fayre) made this replie. shepheard, a friendly demaund ought never to be offensive, and questions of curtesie carry priviledged pardons in their forheads. know, therefore, to discover my fortunes were to renew my sorrowes, and i should, by discoursing my mishaps, but rake fire out of the cynders. therefore let this suffice, gentle shepheard: my dis- tress is as great as my travaile is dangerous, and i wander in this forrest to light on some cotage where i and my page may dwell: for i meane to buy some farme, and a flocke of sheepe, and so become a shepheardesse, meaning to live low, and content mee with a country life; for i have heard the swaines saye, that they drunke without suspition, and slept without care. marry, mistress, quoth coridon, if you meane so you came in good time, for my landlord intends to sell both the farme i tyll, and the flocke i keepe, and cheape you may have them for ready money: and for a shepheards life (oh mistres) did you but live a while in their content, you would say the court were rather a place of sorrow then of solace. here, mistresse, shal not fortune thwart you, but in mean misfortunes, as the losse of a few sheepe, which, as it breedes no beggery, so it can bee no extreame prejudice: the next yeare may mend all with a fresh increase. envy stirres not us, we covet not to climbe, our desires mount not above our degrees, nor our thoughts above our fortunes. care cannot harbour in our cottages, nor doe our homely couches know broken slumbers: as wee exceed not ill dyet, so we have inough to satisfie: and, mistresse, i have so much latin, satis est quod sufficit. by my trueth, shepheard (quoth aliena) thou makest mee in love with your countrey life, and therfore send for thy landlord, and i will buy thy farme and thy flocks, and thou shalt still under me bee overseer of them both : onely for pleasure sake i and my page will serve you, lead the flocks to the field, and folde them. thus will i live quiet, un- knowne, and contented. this newes so gladded the hart of eu phues golden legacie. coridon, that he should not be put out of his farme, that putting off his shepheards bonnet, he did hir all the reverence that he might. but all this while sate montanus in a muse, think- ing of the crueltie of his phoebe, whom he wooed long, but was in no hope to win. ganimede, who stil had the remem- brance of rosader in his thoughtes, tooke delight to see the poore shepheard passionate, laughing at love, that in all his actions was so imperious. at last, when she had noted his teares that stole down his cheeks, and his sighes that broke from the center of his heart, pittying his lament, she demanded of coridon why the yong shepheard looked so sorrowfull ah sir (quoth he) the boy is in love. why (quoth gani- mede) can shepheards love i (quoth montanus) and over- love, els shouldst not thou see me so pensive. love, i tell thee, is as pretious in a shepheards eye, as in the lookes of a king, and we cuntry swains intertaine fancie with as great delight as the proudest courtier doth affection. opportunity (that is the sweetest friend to venus) harboureth in our cot- tages, and loyaltie (the chiefest fealty that cupid requireth) is found more among shepheardes than higher degrees. then, aske not if suche silly swains can love what is the cause then, quoth ganimede, that love being so sweet to thee, thou lookest so sorrowfull ! because quoth montanus, the party beloved is froward, and having curtesie in her lookes, hold- eth disdaine in her tongues ende. what hath she, then, quoth aliena, in heart desire (i hope madame) quoth he, or else my hope lost: dispaire in love were death. as thus they chatted, the sunne being ready to set, and they not hav- ing folded their sheepe, coridon requested she would sit there with her page, till montanus and hee lodged theyr sheepe for that night. you shall goe quoth aliena, but first i will intreate montanus to sing some amorous sonnet that hee made when he hath beene deeply passionate. that i will quoth montanus, and with that he began thus. eu phues golden legacie. montanus sonnet. phoebe sate, sweet she sate, sweet sate phoebe when i saw her, white her brow, coy her eye: brow and eye how much you please me ! words i spent, sighes i sent; sighs and words could never draw hir. oh my love, thou art lost, since no sight could ever ease thee. phoebe sat by a fount, sitting by a fount i spide her: sweet hir touch, rare her voyce: touch and voyce what may distain you ? as she sung i did sigh, and by sighs whilst that i tride her, oh mine eyes! you did loose hir first sight whose want did pain you. phoebes flockes, white as wooll, yet were phoebes locks more whiter. phoebes eyes dovelike mild, dovelike eyes, both mild and cruell. montan sweares, in your lampes he will die for to delight her. phoebe yeeld, or i die. shall true hearts be fancies fuell? eu phues golden legacie. montanus had no sooner ended his sonnet, but coridon with a lowe curtesie rose up, and went with his fellow, and shut their sheepe in the folds; and after returning to aliena and ganimede, conducted them home weary to his poore cottage. by the waye there was much good chat with mon- tanus about his loves, hee resolving aliena that phoebe was the fairest shepherdice in al france, and that in his eye her beautie was equal with the nimphs. but, quoth he as of all stones the diamond is most cleerest, and yet most hard for the lapidorie to cut, as of all flowres the rose is the fairest, and yet guarded with the sharpest prickles: so of al our country lasses phoebe is the brightest, but the most coy of all to stoop unto desire. but let her take heed quoth he, i have heard of narcissus, who for his high disdain against love, perished in the folly of his owne love. with this they were at coridons cottage, where montanus parted from them, and they went in to rest. aliena and ganimede glad of so con- tented a shelter, made merry with the poore swaine; and though they had but countrey fare and course lodging, yet their welcome was so greate, and their cares so little, that they counted their diet delicate, and slept as soundly as if they had beene in the court of torismond. the next morne they lay long in bed, as wearyed with the toyle of unaccus- tomed travaile; but assoone as they got up, aliena resolved there to set up her rest, and by the helpe of coridon swapt a bargaine with his landslord, and so became mistres of the farme and the flocke, her selfe putting on the attyre of a shepherdesse, and ganimede of a yong swaine: everye day leading foorth her flockes, with such delight, that she held her exile happy, and thoght no content to the blisse of a countrey cottage. leaving her thus famous amongst the shep- heards of arden, againe to saladyne. when saladyne had a long while concealed a secrete reso- lution of revenge, and could no longer hide fire in the flax, nor oyle in the flame, (for envy is like lightning, that will appeare in the darkest fog) it chaunced on a morning very eu phues golden legacie early he cald up certain of his servants, and went with them to the chamber of rosader, which being open, hee entred with his crue, and surprised his brother when he was a sleepe, and bound him in fetters, and in the midst of his hall chained him to a post. rosader, amazed at this strange chaunce, began to reason with his brother about the cause of this so- daine extremity, wherin he had wrongd, and what fault he had committed worthy so sharpe a penance saladyne an- swered him onely with a look of disdain, and went his way, leaving poore rosader in a deepe perplexity; who, thus abused, fell into sundry passions, but no means of releefe could be had: wherupon for anger he grew into a discontented me- lancholy. in which humour he continued two or three daies without meat, insomuch that seeing his brother would give him no food, he fel into despaire of his life. which adam spencer, the old servant of sir john of bourdeaux, seeing, touched with the dutie and love hee ought to his olde maister, felt a remorse in his conscience of his sonnes mishap; and therefore, although saladyne had given a generall charge to his servants that none of them upon pain of death should give either meat or drink to rosader, yet adam spencer in the night rose se- cretly, and brought him such victuals as he could provide, and unlockt him, and set him at liberty. after rosader had well feasted himselfe, and felt he was loose, straight his thoughts aymed at revenge, and now (all being a sleepe) hee would have quit saladyne with the methode of his own mis- chiefe. but adam spencer did perswade him to the con- trary with these reasons. sir, quoth hee, be content, for this night go againe into your olde fetters, so shall you trie the faith of friends, and save the life of an old servant. tomorrow hath your brother invited al your kinred and allyes to a solempne breakefast, onely to see you, telling them all that you are mad, and faine to be tied to a poast. assoone as they come complain to them of the abuse proffered you by sala- dyne. if they redresse you, why so; but if they passe over your playntes sicco pede, and hold with the violence of your eu phues golden legacie. brother before your innocence, then thus: i will leave you unlockt that you may breake out at your pleasure, and at the ende of the hall shall you see stand a couple of good pollaxes, one for you and another for mee. when i give you a wincke, shake off your chaines, and let us plaie the men, and make havocke amongst them, drive them out of the house and maintaine possession by force of armes, till the king hath made a redresse of your abuses. these wordes of adam spencer so perswaded rosader, that he went to the place of his punishment, and stood there while the next morning. about the time appointed, came all the guestes bidden by saladyne, whom hee intreated with curteous and curious entertainment, as they all perceived their welcome to be great. the tables in the hall, where rosader was tyed, were covered, and saladyne bringing in his guests togither, shewed them where his brother was bound, and was inchainde as a man lunaticke. rosader made reply, and with some in- vectives made complaintes of the wrongs proffered him by saladyne, desiring they would in pitie seeke some meanes for his reliefe. but in vaine, they had stopt their eares with ulisses, that were his words never so forceable, he breathed onely his passions into the winde. they, carelesse, sat downe with saladyne to dinner, beeing very frolicke and pleasant, washing their heades well with wine. at last, when the fume of the grape had entered peale meale into their braines, they began in satyricall speeches to raile against rosader: which adam spencer no longer brooking, gave the signe, and rosader shaking off his chaines got a pollaxe in his hande, and flew amongst them with such violence and fury, that he hurt many, slew some, and drave his brother and the rest quite out of the house. seeing the coast cleare, he shut the doores, and being sore an hungred, and seeing such good victuals, he sat him downe with adam spencer, and such good fellowes as he knew were honest men, and there feasted themselves with such provision as saladyne had provided for his friends. eu phues golden legacie. after they had taken their repast, rosader rampierd up the house, least upon a sodeine his brother should raise some crew of his tennants, and surprise them unawares. but sala- dyne tooke a contrary course, and went to the sheriffe of the shire and made complaint of rosader, who giving credite to saladyne, in a determined resolution to revenge the gentle- mans wrongs, tooke with him five and twentie tall men, and made a vow, either to break into the house and take rosader, or else to coope him in till hee made him yeeld by famine. in this determination, gathering a crue togither, hee went forward to set saladyne in his former estate. newes of this was brought unto rosader, who smiling at the cowardize of his brother, brookt al the injuries of fortune with patience, expecting the comming of the sheriffe. as he walked upon the battlements of the house, he descryed where saladyne and he drew neare, with a troupe of lustie gallants. at this he smilde, and calde adam spencer, and shewed him the envious treacherie of his brother, and the folly of the sheriffe to bee so credulous. now, adam, quoth he, what shall i do? it rests for me either to yeeld up the house to my brother and seek a reconcilement, or els issue out, and break through the company with courage, for coopt in like a coward i will not bee. if i submit (ah adam') i dishonor my selfe, and that is worse then death, for by such open disgraces, the fame of men growes odious: if i issue out amongst them, fortune may favour mee, and i may escape with life; but suppose the worst: if i be slaine, then my death shall be honorable to me, and so inequall a revenge infamous to sala- dyne. why then, master, forward and feare not: out amongst them: they bee but faint hearted lozels, and for adam spencer, if hee die not at your foote, say he is a dastard. these words cheered up so the heart of yong rosader, that he thought himselfe sufficient for them al, and therefore prepared weapons for him and adam spencer, and were readie to en- tertaine the sheriffe; for no sooner came saladyne and he to -p eu phues golden legaci e. ward and fickle, delighting in the povertie of the lowest, and the overthrow of the highest! to decypher thy inconstancy thou standest upon a globe, and thy wings are plumed with times feathers, that thou maist ever be restlesse: thou art double faced like janus, carrying frownes in the one to threaten, and smiles in the other to betray. thou profferest an eele, and performest a scorpion, and wher thy greatest fa- vours be, there is the feare of the extreamest misfortunes, so variable are all thy actions. but why, adam, doest thou ex- claime against fortune she laughes at the plaintes of the distressed, and there is nothing more pleasing unto her, then to heare fooles boast in her fading allurements, or sorrowfull men to discover the sower of their passions. glut her not, adam, then with content, but thwart her with brooking all mishappes with patience. for there is no greater check to the pride of fortune, then with a resolute courage to passe over her crosses without care. thou art old, adam, and thy haires waxe white: the palme tree is alreadie full of bloomes, and in the furrowes of thy face appeares the kalenders of death: wert thou blessed by fortune thy yeares could not bee many, nor the date of thy life long : then sith nature must have her due, what is it for thee to resigne her debt a little before the day.—ah, it is not that which grieveth mee, nor do i care what mishaps fortune can wage against mee, but the sight of rosader that galleth unto the quicke. when i remember the worships of his house, the honour of his fathers, and the vertues of himselfe, then doo i say, that fortune and the fates are most injurious, to censure so hard extreames, against a youth of so great hope. oh, rosader, thou art in the flower of thine age, and in the pride of thy yeares, buxsome and full of may. nature hath prodigally inricht thee with her favours, and vertue made thee the myr- ror of her excellence; and now, through the decree of the unjust starres, to have all these good partes nipped in the blade, and blemisht by the inconstancie of fortune! ah, rosader, could i helpe thee, my griefe were the lesse, and eu phues golden legacie. happie should my death be, if it might bee the beginning of thy reliefe : but seeing we perish both in one extreame, it is a double sorrow. what shall i doo! prevent the sight of his further misfortune with a present dispatch of mine owne life? ah, despaire is a merciless sinne! as he was readie to go forward in his passion, he looked earnestly on rosader, and seeing him chaunge colour, hee rose up and went to him, and holding his temples, said, what cheere, maister though all faile, let not the heart faint: the courage of a man is shewed in the resolution of his death. at these wordes rosader liſted up his eye, and looking on adam spencer, began to weep. ah, adam, quoth he, i sorrow not to dye, but i grieve at the maner of my death. might i with my launce encounter the enemy, and so die in the field, it were honour, and content: might i (adam) com- bate with some wilde beast, and perish as his praie, i were satisfied; but to die with hunger, o, adam, it is the ex- treamest of all extreames! maister (quoth he) you see we are both in one predicament, and long i cannot live without meate; seeing therefore we can finde no foode, let the death of the one preserve the life of the other. i am old, and over- worne with age, you are yoong, and are the hope of many honours: let me then dye, i will presently cut my veynes, and, maister, with the warme blood relieve your fainting spi- rites: sucke on that till i ende, and you be comforted. with that adam spencer was ready to pull out his knife, when rosader full of courage (though verie faint) rose up, and wisht a. spencer to sit there til his returne; for my mind gives me, quoth he, i shall bring thee meate. with that, like a mad man, he rose up, and raunged up and downe the woods, seeking to encounter some wilde beast with his rapier, that either he might carry his friend adam food, or els pledge his life in pawn for his loyaltie. it chaunced that day, that gerismond, the lawfull king of france banished by toris- mond, who with a lustie crue of outlawes lived in that forest, that day in honour of his birth made a feast to all his bolde e eu phues golden liegaci f. yeomen, and frolickt it with store of wine and venison, sitting all at a long table under the shadow of lymon trees. to that place by chance fortune conducted rosader, who seeing such a crue of brave men, having store of that for want of which hee and adam perished, hee stept boldly to the boords end, and saluted the company thus:— whatsoever thou be that art maister of these lustie squiers, i salute thee as graciously as a man in extreame distresse may : know, that i and a fellow friend of mine are here fa- mished in the forrest for want of food: perish wee must, un- lesse relieved by thy favours. therefore, if thou be a gentle- man, give meate to men, and to such as are everie way woorthie of life. let the proudest squire that sits at thy table rise and incounter with mee in any honorable point of activitie whatso- ever, and if hee and thou proove me not a man, send me away comfortlesse. if thou refuse this, as a niggard of thy cates, i will have amongst you with my sword; for rather wil i dye valiantly, then perish with so cowardly an extreame. geris- mond, looking him earnestly in the face, and seeing so proper a gentleman in so bitter a passion, was mooved with so great pitie, that rising from the table, he tooke him by the hand and badde him welcome, willing him to sit downe in his place, and in his roome not onely to eat his fill, but the lord of the feast. gramercy, sir (quoth rosader) but i have a feeble friend that lyes hereby famished almost for food, aged and therefore lesse able to abide the extremitie of hunger then my selfe, and dishonour it were for me to taste one crumme, before i made him partner of my fortunes: therefore i will runne and fetch him, and then i wil gratefully accept of your proffer. away hies rosader to adam spencer, and tels him the newes, who was glad of so happie fortune, but so feeble he was that he could not go; wherupon rosader got him up on his backe, and brought him to the place. which when gerismond and his men saw, they greatly applauded their league of friendship; and rosader, having gerismonds place assigned him, would not sit there himselfe, but set downe ; eu phues golden legacie. adam spencer. well, to be short, those hungry squires fell to their victuals, and feasted themselves with good delicates, and great store of wine. assoone as they had taken their repast, gerismond (desirous to heare what hard fortune drave them into those bitter extreames) requested rosader to dis- course, (as it were not any way prejudicall unto him) the cause of his travell. rosader (desirous any way to satisfie the curtesie of his favourable host, first beginning his exordium with a volley of sighes, and a fewe luke warme teares) pro- secuted his discourse, and told him from point to point all his fortunes: how he was the yongest sonne of sir john of bour- deaux, his name rosader, how his brother sundry times had wronged him, and lastly, how for beating the sheriffe, and hurting his men, hee fled. and this old man (quoth he) whom i so much love and honour, is surnamed adam spencer, an old servant of my fathers, and one (that for his love) never fayled me in all my misfortunes. when gerismond heard this, he fell on the neck of rosader, and next discoursing unto him, how he was gerismond their lawfull king, exiled by torismond, what familiaritie had ever been betwixt his father, sir john of bourdeaux, and him, how faithfull a subject hee lived, and how honourably he dyed; promising (for his sake) to give both him and his friend such curteous entertainment as his present estate could minister; and upon this made him one of his forresters. rosader seeing it was the king, cravde pardon for his boldnesse, in that hee did not doo him due reverence, and humbly gave him thankes for his favourable curtesie. gerismond, not satisfied yet with newes, beganne to enquire if he had been lately in the court of torismond, and whether he had seene his daughter rosa- lynd, or no! at this, rosader fetcht a deep sigh, and shedding many teares, could not answere: yet at last, gathering his spirits togither, he revealed unto the king, how rosalynde was banished, and how there was such a simpathie of affec- tions betwixt alinda and her, that shee chose rather to be partaker of her exile, then to part fellowship: whereupone the eu phues golden legacie. unnaturall king banished them both; and now they are wan- dred none knowes whither, neither could any learne since their departure, the place of their abode. this newes drive the king into a great melancholy, that presently hee arose from all the company, and went into his privie chamber, so secrete as the harbour of the woods would allow him. the company was all dasht at these tydings, and rosader and adam spencer, having such opportunitie, went to take their rest. where we leave them, and returne againe to torismond. the flight of rosader came to the eares of torismond, who hearing that saladyne was sole heire of the landes of sir john of bourdeaux, desirous to possesse such faire revenewes, found just occasion to quarrell with saladyne about the wrongs he proffered to his brother; and therefore, dispatching a herehault, he sent for saladyne in all poast haste. who marveiling what the matter should be, began to examine his owne conscience, wherein hee had offended his highnesse; but imboldened with his innocence, he boldly went with the herehault unto the court; where, assoone as hee came, hee was not admitted into the presence of the king, but presently sent to prison. this greatly amazed saladyne, chiefly in that the jayler had a straight charge over him, to see that he should be close prisoner. many passionate thoughts came in his head, till at last he began to fall into consideration of his former follies, and to meditate with himselfe. leaning his head on his hand, and his elbow on his knee, full of sor- row, grief and disquieted passions, he resolved into these tearmes. saladynes complaint. unhappie saladyne! whome folly hath led to these misfor- tunes, and wanton desires wrapt within the laborinth of these calamities. are not the heavens doomers of mens deedes' and holdes not god a ballance in his fist, to reward with favour, and revenge with justice " oh, saladyne, the faults eu phues golden legacie. of thy youth, as they were fond, so were they foule, and not onely discovering little nourture, but blemishing the excellence of nature. whelpes of one litter are ever most loving, and brothers that are sonnes of one father should live in friendship without jarre. oh, saladyne, so it should bee; but thou hast with the deere fedde against the winde, with the crabbe strove against the streame, and sought to pervert nature by unkindnesse. rosaders wrongs, the wrongs of rosader (saladyne) cryes for revenge: his youth pleads to god to inflict some penaunce upon thee, his vertues are pleas that inforce writtes of displeasure to crosse thee: thou hast highly abused thy kynde and naturall brother, and the heavens cannot spare to quite thee with punishment. there is no sting to the worme of conscience, no hell to a minde toucht with guilt. every wrong i offred him (called now to remembrance) wringeth a drop of blood from my heart, every bad looke, every frowne pincheth me at the quicke, and saies, saladyne thou hast sinned against rosader. be penitent, and assigne thyselfe some pennance to discover thy sorrow, and pacifie his wrath. in the depth of his passion, hee was sent for to the king, who with a looke that threatened death entertained him, and demaunded of him where his brother was saladyne made answer, that upon some ryot made against the sheriffe of the shire, he was fled from bourdeaux, but he knew not whither. nay, villaine (quoth he) i have heard of the wronges thou hast proffered thy brother, since the death of thy father, and by thy means have i lost a most brave and resolute chevalier. therefore, in justice to punish thee, i spare thy life for thy fathers sake, but banish thee for ever from the court and countrey of france; and see thy departure be within tenne dayes, els trust me thou shalt loose thy head. and with that the king flew away in a rage, and left poore saladyne greatly perplexed; who grieving at his exile, yet determined to bear it with patience, and in penaunce of his former folies eu phues golden legacie. to travaile abroade in every coast till he had found out his brother rosader. with whom now i beginne. rosader, beeing thus preferred to the place of a forrester by gerismond, rooted out the remembrance of his brothers un- kindnes by continuall exercise, traversing the groves and wilde forrests, partly to heare the melody of the sweete birds which recorded, and partly to shew his diligent indea- vour in his masters behalfe. yet whatsoever he did, or how- soever he walked, the lively image of rosalynde remained in memorie: on her sweete perfections he fed his thoughts, proving himselfe like the eagle a true borne bird, since that the one is knowne by beholding the sunne, so was he by re- garding excellent beautie. one day among the rest, finding a fit opportunity and place convenient, desirous to discover his woes to the woodes, hee engraved with his knife on the bark of a mir tre, this pretye estimate of his mistres perfection. sonnetto. of all chast birdes the phoenix doth excell, of all strong beastes the lyon beares the bell, of all sweet flowers the rose doth sweetest smel, of all faire maydes my rosalynd is fairest. of all pure mettals gold is onely purest, of all high trees the pine hath highest crest, of all soft sweets i like my mistris brest, of all chast thoughts my mistris thoughts are rarest. of all proud birds the eagle pleaseth jove, of pretie fowles kind venus likes the dove, of trees minerva doth the olive love, of all sweet nimphs i honour rosalynd. of all her gifts her wisedome pleaseth most, of all her graces vertue she doth boast: for all these gifts my life and joy is lost, if rosalynde prove cruell and unkind. eu phues golden legacie. in these and such like passions rosader did every day eternize the name of his rosalynd; and this day especially when aliena and ganimede (inforced by the heat of the sun to seeke for shelter) by good fortune arrived in that place, where this amorous forrester registred his melancholy pas- sions. they saw the sodaine change of his looks, his folded armes, his passionate sighes: they heard him often abruptly cal on rosalynd, who (poore soule) was as hotly burned as himselfe, but that shee shrouded her paines in the cinders of honorable modesty. whereupon (gessing him to be in love, and according to the nature of their sexe being pittifull in that behalfe) they sodainly brake off his melancholy by theyr approach, and ganimede shooke him out of his dumps thus. what newes, forrester hast thou wounded some deere, and lost him in the fall ! care not man for so small a losse: thy fees was but the skinne, the shoulder, and the horns: tis hunters lucke to ayme faire and misse; and a woodmans fortune to strike and yet go without the game. thou art beyond the marke ganimede (quoth aliena): his passions are greater, and his sighs discovers more losse : perhaps in traversing these thickets, he hath seene some beautifull nimph, and is growne amorous. it may be so (quoth ganimede) for here he hath newly ingraven some sonnet: come, and see the discourse of the forresters poems. reading the sonnet over, and hearing him name rosalynde, aliena lookt on ganimede and laught, and ganimede looking backe on the forrester, and seeing it was rosader, blusht; yet thinking to shrowd all under her pages apparell, she boldly returned to rosader, and began thus. i pray thee tell me, forrester, what is this rosalynd for whom thou pinest away in such passions ! is shee some nymph that wayts upon dianaestraine, whose chastitie thou hast deciphred in such epethites? or is she some shep- herdesse that hants these playnes whose beautie hath so be- witched thy fancie, whose name thou shaddowest in covert eu phues golden legacie. under the figure of rosalynd, as ovid did julia under the name of corinna! or say mee forsooth, is it that rosalynde, of whome wee shepheards have heard talke, shee, forrester, that is the daughter of gerismond, that once was king, and now an outlawe in the forrest of arden? at this rosader fecht a deepe sigh, and sayde, it is she, o gentle swayne, it is she: that saint it is whom i serve, that goddesse at whose shrine i doe bend all my devotions: the most fayrest of all faires, the phenix of all the sexe, and the puritie of all earthly per- fection. and why (gentle forrester) if shee be so beautifull, and thou so amorous, is there such a disagreement in thy thoughts? happily she resembleth the rose, that is sweete, but full of prickles' or the serpent regius that hath scales as glorious as the sunne, and a breath as infectious as the aconi- tum is deadly so thy rosalynd may be most amiable, and yet unkind; full of favour and yet froward, coy without wit, and disdainfull without reason. oh, shepheard (quoth rosader) knewest thou her person- age, graced with the excellence of all perfection, beeing a harbour wherein the graces shrowd their vertues, thou wouldest not breath out such blasphemy against the beaute- ous rosalind. she is a diamond, bright, but not hard, yet of most chast operation: a pearle so orient, that it can be stained with no blemish: a rose without prickles, and a princesse absolute, as well in beauty as in vertue. but i, unhappy i, have let mine eye soare with the eagle against so bright a sun, that i am quite blind: i have with apollo enamoured myselfe of a daphne, not (as she) disdainful, but farre more chast than daphne: i have with ixion laide my love on juno, and shall (i feare) embrace nought but a clowde. ah, shepheard, i have reacht at a starre: my desires have mounted above my degree, and my thoughts above my for- tunes. i being a peasant, have ventured to gaze on a princesse, whose honors are too high to vouchsafe such base loves. why, forrester, quoth ganimede, comfort thy selfe: be blyth and frolike man. love sowseth as low as she soar- euphues golden legacie. eth high: cupid shootes at a ragge assoon as at a roabe; and venus eye that was so curious, sparkled favour on pole- footed vulcan. feare not, man, womens lookes are not tied to dignities feathers, nor make they curious esteeme where the stone is found, but what is the vertue. feare not, for- rester: faint heart never woone faire ladye. but where lives rosalynde now! at the court! oh no, quoth rosader, she lives i knowe not where, and that is my sorrow, banished by toresmond, and that is my hell: for might i but finde her sacred personage, and plead before the bar of her pitie the plaint of my passions, hope telles me shee would grace me with some favour, and that would suffice as a recompence of all my former miseries. much have i heard of thy mistres excellence, and i know, forrester, thou canst describe her at the full, as one that hast survaid all her parts with a curious eye; then doo that favour, to tell me what her perfections be. that i wil, quoth rosa- der, for i glorie to make all eares wonder at my mistres ex- cellence. and with that he pulde a paper foorth his bosome, wherein he read this. rosalyndes description. like to the cleere in highest spheare, where all imperiall glorie shines, of selfe same colour is her haire, whether unfolded, or in twines: heigh ho, faire rosalynde. her eyes are saphires set in snow, refining heaven by every wincke: the gods do feare when as they glow, and i doo tremble when i thinke : heigh ho, would she were mine. her chekes are lyke the blushing clowde that bewtifies auroraes face, or lyke the silver crimsin shrowde, that phoebus smiling lookes doth grace: heigh ho, faire rosalynd. eu phues golden legaci e. her lippes are like two budded roses, whome ranckes of lillies neighbour nie, within which bounds she balme incloses, apt to intice a deitie: heigh ho, would she were mine. her necke, like to a stately tower, when love himselfe imprisoned lies, to watch for glaunces every houre, from her devine and sacred eyes: heigh ho, faire rosalynde. her pappes are centers of delight, her pappes are orbes of heavenly frame, where nature molds the deaw of light, to feed perfection with the same: heigh ho, would she were mine. with orient pearle, with rubie red, with marble white, with saphire blew, her body every way is fed, yet soft in touch, and sweet in view: heigh ho, faire rosalynde. nature her selfe her shape admires, the gods are wounded in her sight, and love forsakes his heavenly fires, and at her eyes his brand doth light: heigh ho, would she were mine. then muse not, nymphes, though i bemone the absence of faire rosalynde, since for her faire there is fairer none, nor for her vertues so devine: heigh ho, faire rosalynde. heigh ho, my heart, would god that she were mine ! periit, quia deperibat. beleeve me (quoth ganimede) eyther the forrester is an exquisite painter, or rosalynde farre above wonder; so it makes me blush to heare how women should be so excellent, and pages so unperfect. rosader beholding her earnestly, answered thus. truly, gentle page, thou hast cause to complaine thee, wert thou the eu phues goldtn legacie. substance, but resembling the shadow, content thyselfe; for it is excellence inough to be like the excellence of nature. he hath aunswered you, ganimede, quoth aliena, it is enough for pages to wait on beautiful ladies, and not to be beautiful them- selves. oh, mistres, quoth ganimede, hold you your peace, for you are partiall: who knowes not, but that all women have desire to tye soveraintie to their petticotes, and ascribe beauty to themselves, wher, if boies might put on their gar- ments, perhaps they would prove as comely, if not as comely, as courteous. but tel me, forrester (and with that she turned to rosader) under whom maintainest thou thy walke gentle swaine, under the king of outlawes, said he ; the unfortunate gerismond, who having lost his kingdome, crowneth his thoughtes with content, accounting it better to governe among poore men in peace, then great men in danger. but hast thou not, said she, (having so melancholy opportunities as this forrest affoordeth thee) written more sonets in commendations of thy mistris i have, gentle swaine, quoth he, but they be not about me: to morrow by dawn of day, if your flocks feed in these pastures, i will bring them you; wherein you shall read my passions, whiles i feele them, judge my patience when you read it: til when i bid farewel. so giving both ganimede and aliena a gentle good night, he resorted to his lodge, leaving them to their prittle prattle. so ganimede (said aliena, the forrester being gone) you are mightily be- loved: men make ditties in your praise, spend sighs for your sake, make an idoll of your beauty: believe mee, it greeves mee not a little to see the poore man so pensive, and you so ah, aliena (quoth she) be not peremptory in your judg- ments. i heare rosalynde praisd as i am ganimede, but were i rosalynde, i could answere the forrester: if he mourne for love, there are medicines for love : rosalynde cannot be faire and unkind. and so, madame, you see it is time to fold our flocks, or else coridon will frown and say, you will never prove good huswife. with that they put ( eu phues golden legacie. their sheepe into the coates, and went home to her friend coridons cottage, aliena as merry as might bee that she was thus in the company of her rosalynde; but shee, poore soule, that had love her loadstarre, and her thoughtes set on fire with the flame of fancie, could take no rest, but being alone began to consider what passionate pennance poore rosader was en- joyned to by love and fortune, that at last shee fell into this humour with her selfe. rosalynde passionate alone. ah, rosalynd, how the fates have set down in theyr sinode to make thee unhappy: for when fortune hath done hir worst, then love comes in to begin a new tragedie : she seeks to lodge her sonne in thyne eyes, and to kindle her fires in thy bosome. beware, fond girle, he is an unruly guest to harbour: for entring in by intreats, he will not be thrust out by force, and her fires are fed with such fuell, as no water is able to quench. seest thou not how venus seekes to wrap thee in her laborynth, wherein is pleasure at the entrance, but within, sorrowes, cares, and discontent! she is a syren, stop thine eares to her melodie; she is a basiliscke, shutte thy eyes, and gaze not at her least thou perish. thou art now placed in the countrey content, where are heavenly thoughtes and meane desires: in those lawnes where thy flocks feed diana haunts: be as her nymphes chast, and enemie to love, for there is no greater honour to a mayd, than to account of fancie as a mortal foe to their sexe. daphne, that bonny wench, was not turned into a bay tree, as the poets fain, but for her chas- titie: her fame was immortall, resembling the lawrell that is ever greene. follow thou her steps, rosalynd, and the ra- ther, for that thou art an exile, and banished from the court; whose distresse, and it is appeased with patience, so it would be renewed with amorous passions. have minde on thy forepassed fortunes; feare the worst, and intangle not thy selfe with present fancies, least loving in hast, thou repent thee at . eu phues golden legacie. ( leisure. ah, but yet, rosalynd, it is rosader that courts thee: one who as he is beutifull, so hee is vertuous, and harboureth in his minde as manie good qualities as his face is shadowed with gratious favours; and therefore rosalynde stoope to love, least, beeing eyther too coy or too cruell, venus waxe wroth, and plague thee with the reward of disdaine. rosalynde thus passionate, was wakened from her dumpes by aliena, who sayd it was time to goe to bed. coridon swore that was true, for charls waine was risen in the north; wheruppon each taking leave of other, went to their rest, all but the poore rosalynde, who was so full of passions, that she could not possesse any content. well, leaving her to her broken slumbers, expect what was performed by them the next morning. the sunne was no sooner stept from the bed of aurora, but aliena was wakened by ganimede, who, restlesse all night, had tossed in her passions, saying it was then time to go to the field to unfold their sheepe. aliena (that spied where the hare was by the hounds, and could see day at a little hole) thought to be pleasaunt with her ganimede, and therefore replied thus: what, wanton; the sun is but new up, and as yet iris riches lies folded in the bosome of flora: phoebus hath not dried up the pearled dew, and so long coridon hath taught me it is not fitte to lead the sheepe abroad, least the deaw being unwholesome, they get the rot: but now see i the old proverbe true, he is in hast whom the devill drives, and where love prickes forward, there is no worse death then delay. ah, my good page, is there fancie in thine eye, and passions in thy heart? what, hast thou wrapt love in thy looks, and sette all thy thoughts on fire by affection i tell thee, it is a flame as harde to be quencht as that of aetna. but nature must have her course: womens eies have faculty attractive like the jeat, and retentive like the diamond : they dally in the delight of faire objects, til gazing on the panthers beautiful skin, repenting experience tel them he hath a de- vouring paunch. come on (quoth ganimede) this sermon of eu phues golden legacie. yours is but a subtiltie to lie stil a bed, because either you think the morning cold, or els i being gone, you would steale a nappe: this shift carries no paulme, and therefore up and away. and for love, let me alone: ile whip him away with nettles, and set disdaine as a charme to withstand his forces; and therefore looke you to your selfe: be not too bold, for venus can make you bend, nor. to coy, for cupid hath a piercing dart, that will make you crie peccavi. and that is it (quoth aliena) that hath raised you so earlie this morning. and with that she slipt on her peticoat, and start up; and assoone as she had made her ready, and taken her breakfast, away goe these two with their bagge and bottles to the field, in more pleasant content of mynd then ever they were in the court of torismond. they came no sooner nigh the foldes, but they might see where their discontented forrester was walking in his melancholy. assoone as aliena saw him, she smiled, and sayd to ganymede, wipe your eyes, sweeting, for yonder is your sweet heart this morning in deep prayers, no doubt, to venus, that she may make you as pitifull as hee is passionate. come on, ganimede, i pray thee, lets have a litle sport with him. content (quoth ganimede) and with that, to waken him out of his deep memento, he began thus: forrester, good fortune to thy thoughts, and ease to thy pas- sions. what makes you so early abroad this morne! in con- templation, no doubt, of your rosalynd. take heede, for- rester; step not too farre, the foord may be deep, and you slip over your shooes. i tell thee, flyes have their spleen, the antes choller, the least haires shadows, and the smallest loves great desires. tis good (forrester) to love, but not to overlove, least in loving her that likes not thee, thou fold thy selfe in an endlesse laborinth. rosader, seeing the faire shep- heardesse and her prettie swayne in whose company he felt the greatest ease of his care, hee returned them a salute on this maner. gentle shepheards, all haile, and as heathfull be your flocks as you happie in content. love is restlesse, and my bedde is eu phues golden legacie. but the cell of my bane, in that there i finde busie thoughtes and broken slumbers: heere (although every where passionate) yet i brooke love with more patience, in that everie object feedes mine eye with varietie of fancies. when i looke on floraes beauteous tapestrie, checkered with the pride of all her treasure, i call to minde the faire face of rosalynd, whose heavenly hue exceeds the rose and the lilly in their highest excellence: the brightnesse of phoebus shine puts mee in minde to think of the sparkeling flames that flew from her eyes, and set my heart first on fire: the sweet harmony of the birds, puts me in remembrance of the rare melody of her voyce, which lyke the syren enchaunteth the eares of the hearer. thus in contemplation i salve my sorrowes, which applying the perfection of every object to the excellencie of her qualities. she is much beholding unto you (quoth aliena) and so much, that i have oft wisht with my selfe, that if i should ever prove as amorous as oenone, i might finde as faithfull a paris as your selfe. how say you by this item, forrester! (quoth ganimede) the faire shepheardesse favours you, who is mistresse of so manye flockes. leave of, man, the supposition of rosalynds love, when as watching at her, you rove beyond the moone, and cast your lookes upon my mistresse, who no doubt is as faire though not so royall, one bird in the hand is worth two in the wood: better possesse the love of aliena, then catch furiously at the shadowe of rosalynd. ile tel thee boy (quoth rosader) so is my fancy fixed on my rosalynde, that were thy mistresse as faire as laeda or danae, whom jove courted in transformed shapes, mine eyes would not vouch to entertaine their beauties: and so hath love lockt me in her perfections, that i had rather onely contem- plate in her beauties, then absolutely possesse the excellence of any other. venus is too blame (forrester) if having so true a servant of you, shee reward you not with rosalynd, if rosalynd were more fairer than her self. f euphues golden legacie. but leaving this prattle, now ile put you in mynd of your promise about those sonnets, which you sayd were at home in your lodge. i have them about mee (quoth rosader) let us sit downe, and then you shall heare what a poeticall fury love will infuse into a man. with that they sate downe upon a greene banke, shadowed with figge trees, and rosader, fetching a deep sigh, read them this sonnet. rosaders sonnet. in sorowes cell i layd me downe to sleepe, but waking woes were jealous of mine eyes, they made them watch, and bend themselves to weepe, but weeping teares their want could not suffice: yet since for her they wept who guides my hart, they weeping smile, and triumph in their smart. of these my teares a fountaine fiercely springs, where venus baynes her selfe incenst with love, where cupid bowseth his faire feathred wings, but i behold what paines i must approve. care drinkes it drie ; but when on her i thinke, love makes me weepe it full unto the brinke. meane while my sighes yeeld truce unto my teares, by them the windes increast and fiercely blow: yet when i sigh the flame more plaine appeares, and by their force with greater power doth glow: amids these paines, all phoenix like i thrive since love, that yeelds me death, may life revive. rosader en esperance. now, surely, forrester (quoth aliena), when thou madest this sonnet, thou wert in some amorous quandarie, neither too fearfull, as dispairing of thy mistresse favours, nor too glee- some, as hoping in thy fortunes. i can smile (quoth gany- mede) at the sonettoes, canzones, madrigales, roundes and roundelaies, that these pensive patients powre out when their eyes are more full of wantonnesse, then their hearts of pas- s eu phues golden legacie. sions. then, as the fishers put the sweetest bayt to the fairest fish, so these ovidians (holding amo in their tongues, when their thoughtes come at hap hazard) write that they bee wrapt in an endlesse laborinth of sorrow, when walking in the large leas of libertie, they only have their humours in their inckpot. if they find women so fond, that they will with such painted lures come to their lust, then they triumph till they be full gorgde with pleasures; and then flye they away (like ramage kytes) to their own content, leaving the tame foole, their mistresse, full of fancie, yet without ever a feather. if they misse (as dealing with some wary wanton, that wants not such a one as themselves, but spies their subtiltie), they ende their amors with a few fained sighes; and so theyr excuse is, their mistresse is cruell, and they smoother passions with patience. such, gentle forrester, we may deeme you to be, that rather passe away the time heere in these woods with wryting amorets, then to be deeply enamoured (as you say) of your rosalynde. if you bee such a one, then i pray god, when you thinke your fortunes at the highest, and your desires to bee most excellent, then that you may with ixion embrace juno in a cloude, and have nothing but a marble mistresse to release your martyrdome; but if you be true and trustie, eye-paynd and heart sick, then ac- cursed be rosalynd if she proove cruel: for, forrester (i flatter not), thou art worthie of as faire as shee. aliena, spying the storme by the winde, smiled to see how gany- mede flew to the fist without any call; but rosader, who tooke him flat for a shepheards swayne, made him this an- swere. trust me, swayne (quoth rosader), but my canzon was written in no such humor; for mine eye and my heart are re- latives, the one drawing fancy by sight, the other entertein- ing her by sorrow. if thou sawest my rosalynd, with what beauties nature hath favoured her—with what perfection the heavens hath graced her—with what qualities the gods have endued her, then woulst thou say, there is none so fickle that f eu phues golden legacie. could be fleeting unto her. if she had been afneas, dido, had venus and juno both scolded him from carthage, yet her ex- cellence, despight of them, would have detained him at tyre. if phillis had been as beautious, or ariadne as vertuous, or both as honourable and excellent as she, neither had the philbert tree sorrowed in the death of dispairing phillis, nor the starres been graced with ariadne, but demophoon and theseus had been trustie to their paragons. i wil tel thee, swayne, if with a deep insight thou couldst pierce into the secrets of my loves, and see what deep impressions of her idea affection hath made in my heart, then wouldst thou con- fesse i were passing passionate, and no lesse indued with ad- mirable patience. why (quoth aliena) needs there pa- tience in love or else in nothing (quoth rosader); for it is a restlesse sore, that hath no ease; a cankar that still frets; a disease that taketh away all hope of sleepe. if then so many sorrowes, sodaine joyes, momentary pleasures, con- tinuall feares, daily griefes, and nightly woes be founde in love, then is not hee to bee accounted patient that smothers all these passions with silence thou speakest by expe- rience (quoth ganimede) and therefore we hold al thy wordes for axiomes. but is love such a lingring maladie' it is (quoth he) either extreame or meane, according to the minde of the partie that entertaines it; for, as the weedes grow longer untoucht then the prettie floures, and the flint lyes safe in the quarry, when the emerauld is suffering the lapidaries toole, so meane men are freed from venus injuries, when kings are environed with a laborinth of her cares. the whiter the lawne is, the deeper is the moale; the more purer the chrysolite, the sooner stained; and such as have their hearts ful of honour, have their loves ful of the greatest sorowes. but in whomsoever (quoth rosader) hee fixeth his dart, hee never leaveth to assault him, till either hee hath wonne him to folly or fancy; for as the moone never goes without the starre lunisequa, so a lover never goeth without the unrest of his thoughts. for proofe you shall ! -: i eu phues golden legacie. heare another fancy of my making. now doo, gentle for- rester (quoth ganimede); and with that he read over this sonetto. rosaders second sonetto. turne i my lookes unto the skies, love with his arrows wounds mine eies; if so i gaze upon the ground, love then [in] every floure is found. search i the shade to flie my paine, he meets me in the shade againe: wend i to walke in secret grove, even there i meet with sacred love. if so i bayne me in the spring, even on the brinke i heare him sing: if so i meditate alone, he will be partner of my mone. if so i mourn, he weeps with me, and where i am, there will he be. when, as i talke of rosalynd, the god from coynesse waxeth kind, and seems in self same flames to fry, because he loves as well as i. sweet rosalynd, for pitty rue; for why, then love i am more true: he, if he speed, will quickly flie, but in thy love i live and die. how like you this sonnet (quoth rosader)? marry (quoth ganimede), for the pen well, for the passion ill; for as i praise the one, i pitie the other, in that thou shouldest hunt after a cloude, and love either without reward or regard. tis neither frowardnesse (quoth rosader), but my hard for- tunes, whose destenies have crost me with her absence; for did shee feele my loves, she would not let me linger in these sorrowes. women, as they are faire, so they respect faith, and estimate more (if they be honourable) the wil than the wealth, having loyaltie the object wherat they ayme their eu phues golden legacie. fancies. but leaving off these interparleyes, you shall heare my last sonnetto, and then you have heard all my poetry; and with that he sight out this:– rosaders third sonnet. of vertuous love myself may boast alone, since no suspect my service may attaint : for perfect faire she is the only one whom i esteem for my beloved saint. thus, for my faith i only beare the bell, and for her faire she only doth excell. then let fond petrarch shrowd his lawraes praise, and tasso cease to publish his affect, since mine the faith confirmd at all assaies, and hers the faire, which all men do respect. my lines hir faire, hir faire my faith assures; thus i by love, and love by me indures. thus (quoth rosader), here is an ende of my poems, but for all this no release of my passions; so that i resemble him that, in the deapth of his distresse, hath none but the eccho to answere him. ganimede, pittying her rosader, thinking to drive him out of his amorous melancholy, said, that now the sunne was in his meridionall heat, and that it was high noone, therefore wee shepheards say, tis time to go to dinner; for the sunne and our stomackes are shepheards dials. there- fore, forrester, if thou wilt take such fare as comes out of our homely scrips, welcome shall answere whatsoever thou wantest in delicates. aliena tooke the entertainment by the ende, and tolde rosader hee should bee her guest. he thankt them heartily, and sat with them downe to dinner, where they had such cates as countrey state did allow them, sawst with such content, and such sweete prattle, as it seemed farre more sweet than all their courtly junkets. assoone as they had taken their repast, rosader, giving them thankes for his good cheare, would have been gone; but ganimede, that was loath to let him passe out of her | | l euphues golden legacie. presence, began thus: nay, forrester, quoth she, if thy busi- nes be not the greater, seeing thou saist thou art so deeply in love, let me see how thou canst wooe: i will represent rosalynde, and thou shalt bee as thou art, rosader. see in some amorous eglogue, how if rosalynd were present, how thou couldst court her; and while we sing of love, aliena shall tune her pipe and plaie us melodie. content (quoth rosader), and aliena, shee, to shew her willingnesse, drew forth a recorder, and began to winde it. then the lovyng forrester began thus. the wooing eglogue betwixt rosalynde and rosader. rosader. i pray thee, nymph, by all the working words, by all the teares and sighs that lovers know, or what our thoughts or faltring tongue affords, i crave for mine in ripping up my woe. sweet rosalynd, my love (would god, my love) my life (would god, my life), aye, pitie me! thy lips are kind, and humble like the dove, and but with beautie pitie wil not be. looke on mine eyes, made red with rufull teares, from whence the raine of true remorse descendeth, all pale in lookes, and i though yoong in yeares, and nought but love or death my dayes befriendeth. oh let no stormy rigour knit thy browes, which love appointed for his mercy seat: the tallest tree by boreas breath it bowes; the yron yeels with hammer, and to heat. oh, rosalynd, then be thou pittifull, for rosalynd is only beautifull. rosalynde. loves wantons arme their traitrous sutes with teares, with vows, with oaths, with lookes, with showers of gold; but when the fruit of their affects appeares, the simple heart by subtil sleights are sold. euphues golden legacie. thus sucks the yeelding eare the poysoned bait, thus feeds the hart upon his endles harmes, thus glut the thoughts themselves on self deceit, thus blind the eyes their sight by subtil charmes. the lovely lookes, the sighs that storme so sore, the deaw of deep dissembled doublenesse, these may attempt, but are of power no more where beauty leanes to wit and soothfastnesse. oh, rosader, then be thou wittifull, for rosalynd scorns foolish pitifull. rosader. i pray thee, rosalynd, by those sweet eyes that stain the sun in shine, the morne in cleare, by those sweet cheeks where love incamped lyes to kisse the roses of the springing yeare. i tempt thee, rosalynd, by ruthfull plaints, not seasoned with deceipt or fraudfull guile, but firm in payn, far more than toong depaints, sweet nymph, be kind, and grace me with a smile. so may the heavens preserve from hurtfull food thy harmless flockes; so may the summer yeeld the pride of all her riches and her good, to fat thy sheepe (the cittizens of field.) oh, leave to arme thy lovely browes with scorne: the birds their beake, the lyon hath his taile, and lovers nought but sighs and bitter mourne, the spotlesse fort of fancie to assaile. oh, rosalynde, then be thou pittifull, for rosalynde is onely beautifull. rosalynde. the hardned steele by fire is brought in frame. rosader. and rosalynde, my love, that any wooll more softer; and shall not sighes her tender hart inflame? rosalynde, were lovers true, maydes would beleeve them ofter. : eu phues golden legacie. (quoth rosader) and laught. content (quoth ganimede) and chaunged as red as a rose: and so with a smile and a blush, they made up this jesting match, that after proved to a mar- riage in earnest, rosader full little thinking hee had wooed and woonne his rosalynde. but all was well; hope is a sweet string to harpe on, and therfore let the forrester a while shape himselfe to his shadow, and tarrie fortunes leysure, till she may make a metamor- phosis fit for his purpose. i digresse; and therefore to aliena, who saide, the wedding was not worth a pinne, unless there were some cheare, nor that bargaine well made that was not striken up with a cuppe of wine: and therefore she wild gani- mede to set out such cates as they had, and to draw out her bottle, charging the forrester, as he had imagined his loves, so to conceipt these cates to be a most sumptuous banquet, and to take a mazer of wine and to drinke to his rosalynde; which rosader did, and so they passed awaye the day in many pleasant devices. till at last aliena perceyved time would tarry no man, and that the sun waxed very low, readie to set, which made her shorten their amorous prattle, and end the banquet with a fresh carrowse: which done, they all three arose, and aliena brake off thus. now, forrester, phoebus that all this while hath beene par- taker of our sports, seeing every woodman more fortunate in his loves than he in his fancies, seeing thou hast woon rosa- lynde, when he could not woo daphne, hides his head for shame, and bids us adiew in a clowd. our sheepe, they poore wantons, wander towards their foldes, as taught by nature their due times of rest, which tels us, forrester, we must de- part. marry, though there were a mariage, yet i must carry this night the bride with mee, and tomorrow morning if you meete us heere, ile promise to deliver you her as good a mayd as i find her. content (quoth rosader) tis enough for me in the night to dreame on love, that in the day am so fond to doate on love; and so till to morrowe you to your folds, and i will to my lodge. and thus the forrester and they parted. eu phues golden legacie. he was no sooner gone, but aliena and ganimede went and folded their flocks, and taking up their hookes, their bags, and their bottles, hyed homeward. by the way aliena (to make the time seeme short) began to prattle with ganimede thus. i have heard them say, that what the fates forepoint, that fortune pricketh downe with a period; that the starres are slicklers in venus court, and desire hangs at the heele of des- tenie: if it be so, then by all probable conjectures, this match will be a marriage: for if augurisme be authenticall, or the devines doomes principles, it cannot bee but such a shadow portends the issue of a substance, for to that ende did the gods force the conceit of this eglogue, that they might discover the ensuing consent of your affections: so that ere it bee long, i hope (in earnest) to daunce at your wedding. tush (quoth ganimede) all is not malte that is cast on the kill: there goes more wordes to a bargaine than one. love feeles no footing in the aire, and fancie holdes it slippery harbour to nestle in the tongue: the match is not yet so surely made, but hee may misse of his market; but if fortune be his friend, i will not be his foe: and so i pray you (gentle mistresse aliena) take it. i take all things well (quoth she) that is your content, and am glad rosader is yours; for now i hope your thoughts will bee at quiet: your eye that ever looked at love, will now lende a glaunce on your lambes, and then they will prove more buxsome, and you more blyth, for the eyes of the maister feedes the cattle. as thus they were in chat, they spyed olde coridon where he came plodding to meet them, who told them supper was ready, which news made them speed them home. where we will leave them to the next morrow, and returne to saladyne. all this while did poore saladyne (banished from bourdeux and the court of france by torismond) wander up and downe in the forrest of arden, thinking to get to lyons, and so travail through germany into italie; but the forrest beeing full of by pathes, and he unskilfull of the country coast, slipt out of the way, and chaunced up into the desart, not farre from the place eu phues golden legacie. where gerismond was, and his brother rosader. saladyne, wearie with wandring up and downe, and hungry with long fasting, finding a little cave by the side of a thicket, eating such fruite as the forest did affoord, and contenting himselfe with such drinke as nature had provided and thirst made de- licate, after his repast he fell in a dead sleepe. as thus he lay, a hungry lyon came hunting downe the edge of the grove for pray, and espying saladyne began to ceaze upon him: but seeing he lay still without any motion, he left to touch him, for that lyons hate to pray on dead carkasses; and yet de- sirous to have some foode, the lyon lay downe and watcht to see if he would stirre. while thus saladyne slept secure, fortune that was careful of her champion began to smile, and brought it so to passe, that rosader (having stricken a deere that but slightly hurt fled through the thicket) came pacing downe by the grove with a boare-speare in his hande in great haste. he spyed where a man lay a sleepe, and a lyon fast by him: amazed at this sight, as he stoode gazing, his nose on the sodaine bledde, which made him conjecture it was some friend of his. whereuppon drawing more nigh, he might easily discerne his visage, perceived by his phishomie that it was his brother saladyne, which drave rosader into a deepe passion, as a man perplexed at the sight of so unexpected a chance, marvelling what should drive his brother to traverse those secrete desarts, without any companie, in such distresse and forlorne sorte. but the present time craved no such doubting ambages, for he must eyther resolve to hazard his life for his reliefe, or else steale away, and leave him to the crueltie of the lyon. in which doubt hee thus briefly debated with himselfe. rosaders meditation. now, rosader, fortune that long hath whipt thee with net- tles, meanes to salve thee with roses, and having crost thee with many frownes, now she presents thee with the bright- euphues golden legacie. oh rosader, what though saladyne hath wronged thee, and made the live an exile in the forrest, shall thy nature bee so cruell, or thy nurture so crooked, or thy thoughts so savage, as to suffer so dismall a revenge what, to let him be de- voured by wilde beastes? non sapit, qui non sibi sapit is fondly spoken in such bitter extreames. loose not his life rosader, to win a worlde of treasure; for in having him thou hast a brother, and by hazarding for his life, thou gettest a friend, and reconcilest an enemie: and more honour shalt thou purchase by pleasuring a foe, than revenging a thousand in- juries. with that his brother began to stirre, and the lyon to rowse himselfe, whereupon rosader sodainly charged him with the boare speare, and wounded the lion very sore at the first stroke. the beast feeling himselfe to have a mortall hurt, leapt at rosader, and with his pawes gave him a sore pinch on the brest, that he had almost faln; yet as a man most valiant, in whom the sparks of sir john bourdeaux remained, he re- covered himselfe, and in short combat slew the lion, who at his death roared so lowd that saladyne awaked, and starting up, was amazed at the sudden sight of so monstrous a beast lying slaine by him, and so sweet a gentleman wounded. he presently (as he was of a ripe conceipt) began to conjecture that the gentleman had slaine him in his defence. where- upon (as a man in a traunce) he stood staring on them both a good while, not knowing his brother, being in that disguise: at last he burst into these tearmes. sir, whatsoever thou be (as full of honour thou must needes be, by the view of thy present valour) i perceive thou hast redressed my fortunes by thy courage, and saved my life with thine own losse, which tyes me to be thine in all humble service. thankes thou shalt have as thy due, and more thou canst not have, for my abilitie denies me to performe a deeper debt. but if any wayes it please thee to commaund me, use mee as farre as the power of a poore gentleman may stretch. rosader seeing hee was unknowne to his brother, woondered s eu phues golden legacie. to heare such courteous wordes come from his crabbed nature; but glad of such reformed nurture, he made this answere. i am, sir (whatsoever thou art) a forrester and ranger of these walkes, who, following my deere to the fall, was conducted hither by some assenting fate, that i might save thee, and disparage myselfe. for comming into this place, i saw thee a sleepe, and the lyon watching thy awake, that at thy rising hee might pray uppon thy carkasse. at the first sight i conjectured thee a gentleman (for all mens thoughts ought to bee favorable in imagination) and i counted it the part of a resolute man to purchase a strangers reliefe, though with the losse of his owne blood, which i have performed (thou seest) to mine owne prejudice. if therefore thou be a man of such worth as i value thee by thy exteriour liniaments, make dis- course unto me what is the cause of thy present misfortunes; for by the furrowes in thy face thou seemest to be crost with her frownes: but whatsoever, or howsoever, lett emee crave that favour, to heare the tragicke cause of thy estate. sala- dyne sitting downe, and fetching a deepe sigh, began thus. saladynes discourse to rosader unknowne. although the discourse of my fortunes be the renewing of of my sorrowes, and the rubbing of the scarre will open a fresh wound, yet that i may not proove ingratefull to so cour- teous a gentleman, i wil rather sitte downe and sigh out my estate, then give any offence by smothering my griefe with silence. knowe therefore (sir) that i am of bourdeaux, and the sonne and heyre of sir john of bourdeaux, a man for his vertues and valour so famous, that i cannot thinke but the fame of his honours hath reacht further than the knowledge of his personage. the infortunate sonne of so fortunate a knight am i, my name, saladine; who succeeding my father in possessions, but not in qualities, having two brethren com- mitted by my father at his death to my charge, with such golden principles of brotherly concorde, as might have pierst like the syrens melodie into any humane eare. but i (with eu phues golden legacie. ulisses became deafe against his philosophicall harmony, and made more value of profit than of vertue, esteeming gold suf- ficient honour, and wealth the fittest title for a gentlemans dignitie. i sette my middle brother to the universitie to bee a scholler, counting it enough if he might pore on a booke while i fed on his revenewes; and for the yoongest (which was my fathers joye) yoong rosader—and with that, naming of rosader, saladyne sate him downe and wept. nay, forward man (quoth the forrester) teares are the un- fittest salve that any man can apply for to cure sorrows, and therefore cease from such feminine follies, as should drop out of a womans eye to deceive, not out of a gentlemans looke to discover his thoughts, and forward with thy discourse. ah, sir (quoth saladyne) this rosader that wrings tears from my eyes, and blood from my heart, was like my father in exteriour personage and in inward qualities; for in the prime of his yeres he aymed all his acts at honor, and co- veted rather to die than to brooke any injury unworthy a gentlemans credite. i, whom envy had made blinde, and covetousnesse masked with the vayle of selfe-love, seeing the palme tree grow straight, thought to suppresse it, being a twig; but nature wil have her course, the cedar will be tall, the diamond bright, the carbuncle glistering, and vertue wil shine though it be never so much obscured. for i kept rosader as a slave, and used him as one of my servile hindes, until age grew on, and a secret insight of my abuse entred into his minde: insomuch, that he could not brooke it, but coveted to have what his father left him, and to live of himselfe. to be short, sir, i repined at his fortunes, and he counter- checkt me, not with abilitie but valour, until at last, by my friends, and ayde of such as folowed gold more than right or vertue, i banisht him from bourdeaux, and hee, poore gentle- man, lives no man knowes where, in some distressed discon- tent. the gods, not able to suffer such impietie unrevenged, so wrought, that the king pickt a causelesse quarrel against me, in hope to have my lands, and so hath exiled me out of g euphues golden legacie. france for ever. thus, thus, sir, am i the most miserable of al men, as having a blemish in my thoughts for the wrongs i profered rosader, and a touch in my estate to be throwne from my proper possessions by injustice. passionat thus with many griefs, in penance of my former follies i go thus pil- grime like to seeke out my brother, that i may reconcile my- selfe to him in all submission, and afterward wend to the holy land, to ende my yeares in as many vertues as i have spent my youth in wicked vanities. rosader, hearing the resolution of his brother saladyne, began to compassionate his sorrowes, and not able to smother the sparkes of nature with fained secrecie, he burst into these loving speeches. then know, saladyne, (quoth hee) that thou hast met with rosader, who grieves as much to see thy dis- tresse, as thy selfe to feele the burthen of thy misery. sala- dyne casting up his eye, and noting well the phismomy of the forrester, knew that it was his brother rosader, which made him so bash and blush at the first meeting, that rosa- der was faine to recomfort him, which he did in such sort, that hee shewed how highly he held revenge in scorne. much ado there was betweene these two brethren, saladyne in craving pardon, and rosader in forgiving and forgetting all former injuries; the one submisse, the other curteous; sala- dyne penitent and passionate, rosader kynd and loving, that at length nature working an union of their thoughts, they ear- nestly embraced, and fell from matters of unkindnesse, to talke of the country life, which rosader so highly commended, that his brother began to have a desire to taste of that homely content. in this humor rosader conducted him to gerismonds lodge, and presented his brother to the king, discoursing the whole matter how all had hapned betwixt them. the king looking upon saladyne, found him a man of a most beautifull personage, and saw in his face sufficient sparkes of ensuing honors, gave him great entertainment, and glad of their friendly reconcilement, promised such favour as the povertie of his estate might affoord, which saladyne gratefully accepted eu phues golden legacie. s and so gerismond fell to question torismonds life. saladyne briefly discourst unto him his injustice and tyrannies with such modestie (although hee had wronged him) that geris- mond greatly praised the sparing speech of the yoong gentle- illan. many questions past, but at last gerismond began with a deepe sigh to inquire if there were any newes of the welfare of alinda, or his daughter rosalynd! none, sir, quoth sala- dyne, for since their departure they were never heard of. injurious fortune (quoth the king) that to double the fathers miserie, wrongst the daughter with misfortunes! and with that (surcharged with sorrowes) he went into his cell, and left saladyne and rosader, whome rosader straight conducted to the sight of adam spencer. who, seeing saladyne in that estate, was in a browne study; but when he heard the whole matter, although hee grieved for the exile of his maister, yet he joyed that banishment had so reformed him, that from a lascivious youth he was proved a vertuous gentleman. look- ing alonger while, and seeing what familiaritie past betweene them, and what favours were interchanged with brotherly af- fection, he sayd thus. i marry, thus it should be: this was the concord that old sir john of bourdeaux wisht betwyxt you. now fulfil you those precepts hee breathed out at his death, and in observing them, looke to live fortunate and die honorable. well sayd, adam spencer (quoth rosader), but hast any victuals in store for us? a piece of a red deer (quoth he) and a bottle of wine. tis forresters fare, brother, quoth rosader: and so they sat downe and fel to their cates. assoone as they had taken their repast, and had wel dined, rosader tooke his brother saladyne by the hand, and shewed him the pleasures of the forrest, and what content they en- joyed in that mean estate. thus for two or three dayes he walked up and downe with his brother to shew him all the commodities that belonged to his walke. in which time hee was mist of his ganymede, who mused greatly (with aliena) what should become of their forester. some while they g euphues golden legacie. thought he had taken some word unkindly, and had taken the pet: then they imagined some new love had withdrawne his fancie, or happely that he was sicke, or detained by some great businesse of gerismonds; or that hee had made a reconcile- ment with his brother, and so returned to bourdeaux. these conjectures did they cast in their heades, but specially ganimede, who, havyng love in heart, prooved restlesse, and halfe without patience, that rosader wronged her with so long absence; for love measures every minute, and thinkes houres to bee dayes, and dayes to bee moneths, till they feede theyr eyes with the sight of theyr desired object. thus per- plexed lived poore ganimede, while on a day, sitting with aliena in a great dumpe, she cast up her eye, and saw where rosader came pacing towardes them with his forrest bill on his necke. at that sight her colour changde, and shee said to aliena, see, mistresse, where our jolly forrester comes. and you are not a little glad thereof (quoth aliena), your nose bewrayes what porredge you love: the winde cannot be tyed within his quarter, the sun shadowed with a vayle, oyle hidden in water, nor love kept out of a womans lookes: but no more of that, lupus est in fabula. assoone as rosader was come within the reach of her tongues ende, aliena began thus. why, how now, gentle forrester, what winde hath kept thee from hence! that being so newly marryed, you have no more care of your rosalynd, but to absent yourself so many dayes! are these the passions you painted out so in your sonnets and roundelaies! i see well hote love is soone cold, and that the fancy of men is like to a loose feather that wan- dreth in the ayre with the blast of every wynd. you are deceived, mistres, quoth rosader; 'twas a coppy of unkindnes that kept me hence, in that, i being married, you caried away the bride: but if i have given any occasion of offence by ab- senting my selfe these three daies, i humbly sue for pardon, which you must grant of course, in that the fault is so friendly confest with penance. but to telyou the truth (faire mistresse, and my good rosalynd) my eldest brother by the injury of eu phues golden legacie. torismond is banished from bourdeaux, and by chance hee and i met in the forrest. and heere rosader discourst unto them what had happened betwixt them, which reconcile- ment made them glad, especially ganimede. but aliena, hearing of the tyrannie of her father, grieved inwardly, and yet smothered all things with such secrecy, that the conceal- ing was more sorrow then the conceipt: yet that her estate might bee hyd stil, she made faire weather of it, and solet all passse. fortune that sawe how these parties valued not her deitie, but helde her power in scorne, thought to have about with them, and brought the matter to passe thus. certaine rascals that lived by prowling in the forest, who for feare of the provost marshall had caves in the groaves and thickets to shrowde themselves from his traines, hearing of the beautie of this faire shepheardesse, aliena, thought to steale her away, and to give her to the king for a present; hoping, because the king was a great leacher, by such a gift to purchase all their par- dons, and therefore came to take her and her page away. thus resolved, while aliena and ganimede were in sad talke, they came rushing in, and layd violent hands upon aliena and her page, which made them crye out to rosader; who having the valour of his father stamped in his hart, thought rather to die in defence of his friends, than any way bee toucht with the least blemish of dishonour, and therefore dealt such blowes amongst them with his weapon, as he did witnesse well upon their carkasses that hee was no coward. but as ne hercules quidem contra duos, so rosader could not resist a multitude, having none to backe him; so that hee was not onely rebatted, but sore wounded, and aliena and ganimede had been quite carryed away by these rascalles, had not fortune (that meant to turne her frowne into a favour) brought saladyne that way by chance, who wandring to find out his brothers walk, encountred this crue: and seeing not onely a shepheardesse and her boy forced, but his brother wounded, he heaved up a forrest bill he had on his neck, and eu phues golden legacie. the first he stroke had never after more need of the phisition; redoubling his blowes with such courage that the slaves were amazed at his valour. rosader, espying his brother so fortu- nately arrived, and seeing how valiantly he behaved himselfe, though sore wounded rushed amongst them, and layd on such loade, that some of the crue were slaine, and the rest fled, leaving aliena and ganimede in the possession of rosader and saladyne. aliena after shee had breathed awhile and was come to her selfe from this feare, lookt about her, and saw where gani- mede was busie dressyng up the woundes of the forrester: but shee cast her eye upon this curteous champion that had made so hotte a rescue, and that with such affection, that shee began to measure every part of him with favour, and in her selfe to commende his personage and his vertue, holding him for a resolute man, that durst assaile such a troupe of unbrydeled villaines. at last, gathering her spirits together, she returned him these thankes. gentle sir, whatsoever you bee that have adventured your flesh to relieve our fortunes, and to have as many hidden ver- tues as you have manifest resolutions. wee poore shep- heardes have no wealth but our flocks, and therefore can wee not make requitall with any great treasures; but our recom- pence is thankes, and our rewards to our friends without fain- ing. for rannsome therefore of this our rescue, you must content your selfe to take such a kinde gramercy as a poore shepheardesse and her page may give, with promise (in what wee may) never to proove ingratefull. for this gentleman that is hurt, yoong rosader, hee is our good neighbour and familiar acquaintance: weele pay him with smiles, and feed him with love-lookes; and though he be never the fatter at the yeares ende, yet weele so hamper him that he shall hold himselfe satisfied. saladyne, hearing this shepheardesse speake so wisely, began more narrowly to pry into her perfection, and to survey all her liniaments with a curious insight; so long dallying in euphues golden legacie. the flame of her beautie, that to his cost he found her to be most excellent. for love that lurked in all these broyles to have a blow or two, seeing the parties at the gaze, encoun- tered them both with such a veny, that the stroke pierst to the heart so deep as it could never after be raced out. at last, after hee had looked so long, till aliena waxtred, he re- turned her this answere. faire shepheardesse, if fortune graced me with such good hap as to doo you any favour, i hold my selfe as contented as if i had gotten a great conquest; for the reliefe of distress- ed women is the speciall point that gentlemen are tyed unto by honor: seeing then my hazard to rescue your harmes was rather duty than curtesie, thankes is more than belongs to the requitall of such a favour. but least i might seeme either too coy or too carelesse of a gentlewomans proffer, i will take your kinde gramercie for a recompence. all this while that he spake, ganimede lookt earnestly upon him, and sayd, truly, rosader, this gentleman favours you much in the feature of your face. no marvell (quoth he, gentle swayne) for tis my eldest brother saladyne. your brother, quoth aliena' (and with that she blusht) he is the more welcome, and i hold myselfe the more his debter: and for that he hath in my behalf done such a piece of service, if it please him to do me that honor, i will cal him servant, and he shall cal me mistresse. content, sweet mistresse, quoth saladyne, and when i forget to call you so, i will be unmindfull of mine owne selfe. away with these quirkes and quiddities of love, quoth rosader, and give me some drinke, for i am passyng thirstie, and then will i home, for my woundes bleed sore, and i will have them drest. ganimede had teares in her eyes, and passions in her heart to see her rosader so payned, and therefore stept hastily to the bottle, and filling out some wine in a mazer, she spiced it with such comfortable drugges as she had about her, and gave it him, which did comfort rosader, that rysing (with the helpe of his brother) hee tooke his leave of them, and went to his lodge. ganimede, assoone eu phues golden legacie. as they were out of sight, led his flocks downe to a vale, and there under the shadow of a beech tree sat downe, and began to mourne the misfortunes of her sweet heart. and aliena (as a woman passyng discontent) severing her- selfe from her ganimede, sitting under a lymon tree, began to sigh out the passions of her new love, and to meditate with hir selfe in this maner. alienaes meditation. aye me! now i see, and sorrowing sigh to see, that dianaes lawrels are harbours for venus doves; that there trace as well through the lawnes wantons as chast ones; that calisto, be she never so charie, wil cast one amorous eye at courting jove; that diana her selfe will chaunge her shape, but shee will honour love in a shaddow; that maydens eyes bee they as hard as diamonds, yet cupide hath drugs to make them more pliable than waxe. see, alinda, how fortune and love have interleagued themselves to be thy foes, and to make thee theyr subject, or els an abject, have inveigled thy sight with a most beautiful object. alate thou didst hold venus for a giglot, not a goddesse, and now thou shalt bee forst to sue suppliant to her deitie. cupide was a boy and blinde; but, alas, his eye had ayme inough to pierce thee to the hart. while i lived in the court i held love in contempt, and in high seats i had small desires. i knew not affection while i lived in dignitie, nor could venus counterchecke me, as long as my fortune was majestie, and my thoughtes honour: and shall i now bee high in desires, when i am made lowe by des- tinie! i have heard them say, that love lookes not at low cottages, that venus jettes in roabes not in ragges, that cupide flyes so high, that hee scornes to touch povertie with his heele. tush, alinda, these are but olde wives tales, and neither authenticall precepts, nor infallible principles; for experience tels thee, that peasauntes have theyr passions as well as princes, that swaynes as they have theyr labours, so euphues golden legacie. they have theyr amoures, and love lurkes assoone about a sheepcoate as a pallaice. ah, alinda, this day in avoyding a prejudice thou art fallen into a deeper mischiefe; being rescued from the robbers, thou art become captive to saladyne: and what then? women must love, or they must cease to live; and therefore did nature frame them faire, that they might be subject to fancy. but perhaps saladines eye is levelde upon a more seemlier saint. if it be so, beare thy passions with patience; say love hath wrongd thee, that hath not wroong him; and if he be proud in contempt, be thou rich in content, and rather dye than discover any desire: for there is nothing more pre- tious in a woman than to conceale love, and to die modest. he is the sonne and heire of sir john of bourdeaux, a youth comely enough. oh, alinda, too comely, elshadst not thou been thus discontent: valiant, and that fettered thine eye: wise, else hadst thou not been now wonne; and for all these vertues banished by thy father, and therefore if he know thy parent- age, he wil hate the fruit for the tree, and condemne the yoong sien for the old stock. well, howsoever, i must love, and, whomsoever i will; and, whatsoever betide, aliena will thinke wel of saladyne, suppose he of me as he please. and with that fetching a deep sigh, she rise up, and went to ganimede, who all this while sat in a great dumpe, fearing the imminent danger of her friend rosader: but now aliena began to comfort her, her selfe being over growne with sor- rowes, and to recall her from her melancholy with many pleasaunt perswasions. ganimede tooke all in the best part, and so they went home togither after they had folded their flocks, supping with old coridon, who had provided there cates. hee, after supper, to passe away the night while bed time, began a long discourse, how montanus the yoong shep- heard, that was in love with phoebe, could by no meanes ob- taine any favour at her hands, but still pained in restlesse passions remained a hopelesse and perplexed lover. i would i might (quoth aliena) once see that phoebe. is she so faire eu phues golden legacie. that she thinks no shepheard worthy of her beauty' or so froward that no love nor loyaltie will content her or so coy, that she requires a long time to be wooed or so foolish that she forgets, that like a fop she must have a large harvest for a little corne! i cannot distinguish (quoth coridon) of these nice qualities; but one of these dayes ile bring montanus and her downe, that you may both see their persons, and note their passions; and then where the blame is, there let it rest. but this i am sure, quoth coridon, if al maidens were of her mind, the world would grow to a mad passe; for there would be great store of wooing and litle wedding, many words and little worship, much folly and no faith. at this sad sentence of coridon, so solempnly brought forth, aliena smiled, and because it waxt late, she and her page went to bed, both of them having fleas in their eares to keep them awake, ganimede for the hurt of her rosader, and aliena for the affection she bore to saladyne. in this discontented humour they past away the time, till falling on sleepe, their sences at rest, love left them to their quiet slumbers, which were not long. for as soon as phoebus rose from his aurora, and began to mount him in the skie, summoning plough-swaines to their handy labour, aliena arose, and going to the couch where ganimede lay, awakened her page, and said the morning was farre spent, the deaw small, and time called them away to their foldes. ah, ah! quoth ganimede, is the wind in that doore then in fayth i perceive that there is no diamond so hard but will yeeld to the file, no cedar so strong but the wind will shake, nor any mind so chast but love will change. well, aliena, must saladyne be the man, and will it be a match! trust me, he is faire and valiant, the sonne of a worthy knight, whome if he imitate in perfection, as he represents him in proportion, he is worthy of no lesse than aliena. but he is an exile. what then? i hope my mistresse respectes the vertues not the wealth, and measures the qualities not the substance. those dames that are like danae, that like jove in no shape but in : f º ſ ! eu phues golden legacie. a shower of gold, i wish them husbands with much wealth and little witte, that the want of the one may blemish the abundance of the other. it should (my aliena) stayne the honour of a shepheards life to set the end of passions upon pelfe. loves eyes looks not so low as golde: there is no fees to be payd in cupids courtes, and in elder time (as coridon hath told me) the shepheardes love-gifts were apples and chest- nuts, and then their desires were loyall, and their thoughts constant. but now, quaerenda pecunia primum, post nummos virtus. and the time is grown to that which horace in his satyres wtote. on : omnis enim res virtus fama decus divina humanaque pulchris divitiis parent: quas qui constrinxerit ille clarus crit, fortis, justus, sapiens, etiam et rex et quicquid volet– but, aliena, lette it not be so with thee in thy fancies, but respect his faith and there an ende. aliena, hearing gani- mede thus forward to further saladyne in his affections, thought shee kist the child for the nurses sake, and woed for him that she might please rosader, made this reply. why, ganimede, whereof growes this perswasion! hast thou seene love in my lookes, or are mine eyes growne so amorous, that they discover some newe entertayned fancies! if thou mea- sured my thoughts by my countenance, thou maiest prove as ill a phisiognomer, as the lapidarie that aymes at the secret vertues of the topaze by the exterior shadow of the stone. the operation of the agate is not known by the strakes, nor the diamond prized by his brightnesse, but by his hardnesse. the carbuncle that shineth most is not ever the most pretious; and the apothecaries choose not flowers for their colours, but for their vertues. womens faces are not alwayes calenders of fancie, nor do their thoughts and their lookes ever agree; for when their eyes are fullest of favors, eu phues golden legacie. then are they oft most emptie of desire; and when they seeme to frowne at disdain, then are they most forward to affection. if i bee melancholie, then, ganimede, tis not a consequence that i am intangled with the perfection of saladyne. but seeing fire cannot be hid in the straw, nor love kept so covert but it will be spyed, what shoulde friends conceale fancies knowe, my ganimede, the heautie and valour, the wit and prowesse of saladyne hath fettered aliena so farre, as there is no object pleasing to her eyes but the sight of saladyne; and if love have done me justice to wrap his thoughts in the foldes of my face, and that he be as deeply enamoured as i am passionate, i tell thee, ganimede, there shall not be much wooing, for she is already wonne, and what needes a longer battery. i am glad, quoth ganimede, that it shall be thus proportioned, you to match with saladyne, and i with rosader: thus have the destenies favoured us with some pleasing aspect, that have made us as private in our loves, as familiar in our fortunes. with this ganimede start up, made her ready, and went into the fields with aliena, where unfolding their flockes, they sate them downe under an olive tree, both of them amorous, and yet diversly affected, aliena joying in the excellence of saladyne, and ganimede sorowing for the wounds of her rosader; not quiet in thought till shee might heare of his health. as thus both of them sate in their dumpes, they might espie where coridon came running towards them (almost out of breath with his hast). what newes with you (quoth aliena) that you come in such post! oh, mistres (quoth co- ridon) you have a long time desired to see phoebe, the faire shepheardesse whom montanus loves; so now if you please, you and ganimede, to walke with mee to yonder thicket, there shall you see montanus aud her sitting by a fountaine, he courting her with her countrey ditties, and she as coy as if she held love in disdaine. the newes were so welcome to the two lovers, that up they rose, and went with coridon. assoone as they drew nigh eu phues golden legacie. : the thicket, they might espie where phoebe sate (the fairest shepherdesse in all arden, and he the frolickst swaine in the whole forrest) she in a petticote of scarlet, covered with a green mantle, and to shrowd her from the sunne, a chaplet of roses, from under which appeared a face full of natures excel- lence, and two such eyes as might have amated a greater man than montanus. at gaze uppon this gorgeous nymph sate the shepheard, feeding his eyes with her favours, wooing with such piteous lookes, and courting with such deepe strained sighs, as would have made diana her selfe to have beene com- passionate: at last, fixing his lookes on the riches of her face, his head on his hande, and his elbow on his knee, hee sung this mournefull dittie. montanus sonnet. a turtle sate upon a leavelesse tree, mourning her absent pheare, with sad and sorry cheare: about her wondring stood the citizens of wood, and whilest her plumes she rents, and for her love laments, the stately trees complaine them, the birds with sorrow paine them. each one that doth her view, iier paine and sorrowes rue; but were the sorrowes knowne that me hath overthrowne, oh how would phoebe sigh, if shee did looke on me? the love sicke polypheme, that could not see, who on the barraine shore, his fortunes doth deplore, and melteth all in mone for galatea gone ; and with his piteous cries, afflicts both earth and skies, and to his woe betooke, doth breake both pipe and hooke; eu phues golden legacie. for whom complaines the morne, for whom the sea nymphs mourne: alas, his paine is nought; for were my woe but thought, oh how would phoebe sigh, if shee did looke on me? beyond compare my paine; yet glad am i, if gentle phoebe daine to see her montan die. after this, montanus felte his passions so extreame, that he fel into this exclamation against the injustice of love:- helas tirant, plein de rigueur, modere un peu ta violence: que te sert si grande dispense p c'est trop de flammes pour un cueur. esparguez en une estincelle, puis fayton effort d'esmovoir, la fiere qui ne veut point voir, en quel feu je brousle pour elle. execute, amour, ce dessein, et rabaisse un peu son audace: son cuer ne doit estre de glace, bien que elle ait deniege le sein. montanus ended his sonet with such a volley of sighs, and such a streame of teares, as might have moved any but phoebe to have granted him favor. but she, measuring all his passions with a coy disdaine, and triumphing in the poore shepheards patheticall humors, smiling at his martyrdome as though love had beene no maladie, scornfully warbled out this sonet. phoebes sonet, a replie to montanus passion. downe a downe, thus phyllis sung, by fancie once distressed: who so by foolish love are stung, are worthily oppressed. and so sing i. with a downe, downe, &c. euphues golden legacie. gratious looke my passions are many, my loves more, my thoughts loyaltie, and my fancie faith: al devoted in humble devoire to the service of phoebe; and shall i reape no reward for such fealties? the swaines dayly labours is quit with the evenings hire, the ploughmans toyle is eased with the hope of corne, what the oxe sweates out at the plough, he fatneth at the cribbe; but infortunate montanus hath no salve for his sorrowes, nor any hope of recompence for the hazard of his perplexed passions. if, phoebe, time maye plead the proofe of my truth, twise seaven winters have i loved faire phoebe: if constancie be a cause to further my sute, montanus thoughts have beene sealed in the sweete of phoebes excellence, as far from change as she from love: if outward passions may dis- cover inward affections, the furrows in my face may discover the sorrows of my heart, and the mappe of my looks the griefs of my mind. thou seest (phoebe) the teares of despayre have made my cheeks full of wrinckes, and my scalding sighes have made the ayre eccho her pittie conceived in my plaintes: philomele hearing my passions, hath left her mournfull tunes -to listen to the discourse of my miseries. i have pourtrayed in every tree the beauty of my mistres, and the despaire of my loves. what is it in the woods cannot witnes my woes! and who is it would not pittie my plaints! only phoebe. and why? because i am montanus, and she phoebe; i a worth- les swaine, and she the most excellent of all faires. beautifull phoebe! oh, might i say pittifull, then happy were i, though i tasted but one minute of that good hap. measure montanus, not by his fortunes, but by his loves, and ballance not his wealth, but his desires, and lende but one gratious looke to cure a heape of disquieted cares. if not, ah! if phoebe cannot love, let a storme of frownes end the discontent of my thoughts, and so let me perish in my desires, because they are above my deserts: onely at my death this favour cannot be denied me, that al shal say montanus died for love of hard hearted phoebe. at these wordes she fild her face full of frowns, and made him this short and sharpe reply. eu phues golden legacie. importunate shepheard, whose loves are lawlesse, because restlesse, are thy passions so extreame that thou canst not conceale them with patience? or art thou so folly-sicke, that thou must needes be fancie-sicke, and in thy affection tyed to such an exigent, as none serves but phoebe | well, sir, if your market can be made no where els, home againe, for your mart is at the fayrest. phoebe is no lettice for your lips, and her grapes hang so high, that gaze at them you may, but touch them you cannot. yet, montanus, i speake not this in pride, but in disdaine: not that i scorne thee, but that i hate love; for i count it as great honor to triumph over fancie as over fortune. rest thee content therfore, montanus: cease from thy loves, and bridle thy lookes, quench the sparkles before they grow to a further flame; for in loving mee thou shalt but live by losse, and what thou utterest in wordes are all written in the wind. wert thou (montanus) as faire as paris, as hardy as hector, as constant as troylus, as loving as leander, phoebe could not love, because she cannot love at all: and therefore if thou pursue me with phoebus, i must flie with daphne. ganimede, overhearing all these passions of montanus, could not brooke the crueltie of phoebe, but starting from be- hind the bush said: and if, damzell, you fled from mee, i would transforme you as daphne to a bay, and then in contempt trample your branches under my feet. phoebe at this so- daine replye was amazed, especially when shee saw so faire a swaine as ganimede; blushing therefore, she would have bene gone, but that he held her by the hand, and prosecuted his reply thus: what, shepheardesse, so faire and so cruell? disdaine beseemes not cottages, nor coynesse maids; for either they be condemned to be too proud, or too froward. take heed, faire nymph, that in despising love, you be not over-reacht with love, and in shaking off all, shape yourselfe to your owne shadow, and so with narcissus prove passionat and yet unpitied. oft have i heard, and sometime have i seene, high disdaine turnd to hot desires. because thou art h eu phues golden legacie. beautifull be not so coy: as there is nothing more fair, so there is nothing more fading; as momentary as the shad- dowes which growes from a clowdy sunne. such (my faire shepheardesse) as disdaine in youth desire in age, and then are they hated in the winter, that might have been loved in the prime. a wringled mayd is like to a parched rose, that is cast up in coffers to please the smell, not worne in the hand to content the eye. there is no folly in love to had i wist, and therefore be rulde by mee. love while thou art yoong, least thou be disdained when thou art olde. beautie nor time cannot be recalde, and if thou love, like of montanus; for if his desires are many, so his deserts are great. phoebe all this while gazed on the perfection of ganimede, as deeply enamored on his perfection as montanus inveigled with hers; for her eye made survey of his excellent feature, which she found so rare, that she thought the ghost of adonis had leapt from elizium in the shape of a swaine. when she blusht at her owne folly to looke so long on a stranger, she mildely made answere to ganimede thus. i cannot deny, sir, but i have heard of love, though i never felt love; and have read of such a goddesse as venus, though i never sawe any but her picture; and, perhaps, and with that shee waxed red and bashfull, and with all silent: which ganimede perceiv- ing, commended in her selfe the bashfulnesse of the mayd, and desired her to go forward. and perhaps, sir (quoth she), mine eye hath been more prodigal to day than ever before: and with that she stayd againe, as one greatly passionate and perplexed. aliena seeing the hare through the maze, bade her forward with her prattle, but in vaine; for at this abrupt period she broke off, and with her eyes full of teares, and her face covered with a vermillion die, she sat downe and sighed. whereupon aliena and ganimede, seeing the shepheardesse in such a straunge plight, left phoebe with her montanus, wishing hir friendly that she would be more pliant to love, least in penance venus joyned her to some sharpe repentance. phoebe made no reply, but fetcht such a sigh, that eccho made eu phues golden legacie. relation of hir plaint, giving ganimede such an adieu with a piercing glance, that the amorous girle-boy perceived phoebe was pincht by the heele. but leaving phoebe to the follies of her new fancie, and montanus to attend uppon her, to saladyne, who all this last night could not rest for the remembrance of aliena; inso- much that he framed a sweet conceited sonnet to content his humor, which hee put in his bosome, being requested by his brother rosader to go to aliena and ganimede, to signify unto them that his woundes were not dangerous. a more happy message could not happen to saladyne, that taking his forrest bill on his neck, he trudgeth in all haste towardes the plaines where alienaes flockes did feede, comming just to the place when they returned from montanus and phoebe. fortune so conducted this jolly forrester, that he encountred them and coridon, whom hee presently saluted in this maner. faire shepheardesse, and too faire, unless your beautie be tempred with curtesie, and the liniaments of the face graced with the lowlinesse of mynd, as many good fortunes to you and your page, as your selves can desire or imagine. my brother rosader (in the grief of his green wounds stil mynd- ful of his friends) hath sent me to you with a kynd salute, to shew that he brooks his paines with the more patience, in that he holds the parties precious in whose defence hee re- ceived the prejudice. the report of your welfare will be a great comfort to his distempered body and distressed thoughts, and therefore he sent me with a strickt charge to visite you. and you (quoth aliena) are the more welcome in that you are messenger from so kynd a gentleman, whose paines we compassionate with as great sorrow as he brookes them with griefe; and his wounds breeds in us as many passions as in him extremities, so that what disquiet he feeles in bodie, we partake in heart, wishing (if wee might) that your mishap might salve his malady. but seeing our wils yeelds him litle ease, our orizons are never idle to the gods for his re- covery. i pray, youth, (quoth ganimede with teares in his h eu phues golden legacie. eyes) when the surgion searcht him, held hee his woundes dangerous? dangerous (quoth saladyne) but, not mortall, and the sooner to be cured, in that his patient is not impa- tient of any paines: whereupon my brother hopes within these ten dayes to walke abroad and visite you himselfe. in the meane time (quoth ganimede) say his rosalynde com- mends her to him, and bids him be of good cheare. i know not (quoth saladyne) who that rosalynde is, but whatsoever shee is, her name is never out of his mouth, but amidst the deepest of his passions hee useth rosalynde as a charme to appease all sorrowes with patience; insomuch that i conjec- ture my brother is in love, and shee some paragon that holdes his heart perplexed, whose name he oft records with sighes, sometimes with teares, straight with joye, then with smiles; as if in one person love had lodged a chaos of confused pas- sions. wherin i have noted the variable disposition of fancy, that lyke the polype in colours, so it changeth into sundry humors, being as it should seeme, a combat myxt with disquiet, and a bitter pleasure wrapt in a sweet preju- dice, lyke to the sinople tree, whose blossomes delight the smell, and whose fruit infects the taste. by my fayth (quoth aliena) sir, you are deep read in love, or growes your insight into affection by experience howso- ever, you are a great philosopher in venus principles, els could you not discover our secret aphorismes. but, sir, our countrey amours are not lyke your courtly fancies, nor is our wooing lyke your suing; for pore shepheards never plaine them till love paine them, where the courtiers eyes is full of passions, when his heart is most free from affection: they court to discover their eloquence, wee wooe to ease our sor- rowes; every faire face with them must have a new fancy sealed with a fore-finger kisse, and a farre fetcht sigh: we heere love one, and live to that one, so long as life can main- taine love, using few ceremonies, because we know fewe subtilties, and litle eloquence, for that we lightly accompt of flattery: onely faith and troth, thats shepheards wooing; eu phues golden legacie. and, sir, how lyke you of this? so (quoth saladyne) as i could tie my self to such love. what, and looke so low as a shepheardesse, being the sonne of sir john of bourdeaux' such desires were a disgrace to your honors. and with that surveying exquisitely every part of him, as uttering all these wordes in a deepe passion, she espied the paper in his bosom; wherupon growing jealous that it was some amorous sonnet, she sodeinly snacht it out of his bosome, and asked if it were anye secret! she was bashfull, and saladyne blusht, which she preceiving, sayd: nay then, sir, if you waxe redde, my life for yours tis some love matter. i will see your mistresse name, her praises, and your passions: and with that she lookt on it, which was written to this effect. saladynes sonnet. if it be true, that heavens eternall course with restlesse sway and ceaseless turning glides; if aire inconstant be, and swelling sourse turne and returns with many fluent tides; if earth in winter summer pride estrange, and nature seemeth onely faire in change; if it be true, that our mmortall spright, derivde from heavenly pure, in wandring still in noveltie and strangenesse doth delight, and by discoverent power discerneth ill; and if the body for to worke his best doth with the seasons change his place of rest; whence comes it that (inforst by furious skies) i change both place and soyle, but not my hart, yet salve not in this change my maladies? whence growes it that each object workes my smart? alas, i see my faith procures my misse, and change in love against my nature is. et florida pungunt. aliena having read over his sonnet, began thus pleasantly to descant upon it. i see, saladyne (quoth she), that as the sun is no sun without his brightnesse, nor the diamond ac- euphues golden legacie, counted for precious unlesse it be hard, so men are not men unless they be in love; and their honors are measured by their amours, not their labors, counting it more commendable for a gentleman to be ful of fancy, than full of vertue. i had thought otia si tollas periere cupidinis arcus, contemptaeque jacent, & sine luce faces: but i see ovids axiome is not authenticall, for even labour hath her loves, and extremitie is no pumice stone to race out fancy. yourselfe exiled from your wealth, friendes, and country by torismond, (sorrowes inough to suppresse affec- tions) yet amidst the depth of these extremities, love will be lord, and shew his power to bee more predominant than for- tune. but i pray you, sir, (if without offence i may crave it) are they some new thoughts, or some olde desires? saladyne (that now saw opportunitie pleasant) thought to strike while the yron was hotte, and therefore taking aliena by the hand, sate downe by her; and ganimede, to give them leave to their loves, found her selfe busie about the foldes, whilest saladyne fell into this prattle with aliena. faire mistresse, if i be blunt in discovering my affections, and use little eloquence in levelling out my loves, i appeale for pardon to your owne principles, that say, shepheards use few ceremonies, for that they acquaint themselves with few subtilties. to frame my selfe therefore to your country fashion with much faith and little flattery, know, bewtifull shepheard- esse, that whylest i lived in the court i knew not loves comber, but i helde affection as a toy, not as a malady; using fancy as the hiperborei doo their flowers, which they weare in their bosome all day, and cast them in the fire for fuell at night. i lyked all, because i loved none, and who was most faire, on her i fed mine eye; but as charily as the bee, that assoone as shee hath suckthonny from the rose, flies straight to the next marigold. living thus at mine owne list, i wondred at such as were in love, and when i read their passions, i tooke them onely for poemes that flowed from the quicknesse euphues golden legacie. of the wyt, not the sorrowes of the heart. but now (faire nymph) since i became a forrester, love hath taught me such a lesson that i must confesse his deitie and dignitie, and saie as there is nothing so pretious as beuty, so there is nothing more piercing than fancy. for since first i arrived at this place, and mine eye tooke a curious survey of your excellence, i have been so fettered with your beautie and vertue, as (sweet aliena) saladyne without further circumstance loves aliena. i could paynt out my desires with long ambages; but seeing in many words lyes mistrust, and that truth is ever naked, let this suffice for a country wooing, saladyne loves aliena, and none but aliena. although these wordes were most heavenly harmony in the eares of the shepheardesse, yet to seeme coye at the first courting, and to disdaine love howsoever she desired love, she made this reply. ah, saladyne, though i seeme simple, yet i am more subtile than to swallow the hooke because it hath a painted bayt: as men are wily so women are wary, especially if they have that wyt by others harmes to beware. do we not know, sala- dyne, mens toongs are like mercuries pipe, that can inchant argus with an hundreth eyes! and their words are prejudiciall as the charmes of circes, that transforme men into monsters. if such syrens sing, we poore women had need stoppe our eares, least in hearing wee prove so foolish hardy as to believe them, and so perish in trusting much, and suspecting litle. saladyne, piscatorictus sapit, hee that hath been once poisoned, and afterwards fears not to bowse of every potion, is worthy to suffer double pennance. give mee leave then to mistrust, though i doo not condemne. saladyne is now in love with aliena, hee a gentleman of great parentage, shee a shep- hardesse of meane parents; he honorable, and shee poore: can love consist of contrarieties! wyll the fawlcon pearch with the kistresse, the lyon harbor with the woolfe? will venus joyne roabes and rags togither, or can there be a sym- pathie betweene a king and a begger ? then, saladyne, how eu phues golden legacie. yoong ganimede: first his locks, which being amber hued, passeth the wreath that phoebus puts on to make his front glorious: his browe of yorie was like the seate where love and majestie sits inthronde to enchaine fancy: his eyes as bright as the burnishing of the heaven, darting forth frowns with disdaine, and smiles with favour, lightning such lookes as would enflame desire, were she wrapt in the circle of the frozen zoane: in his cheekes the vermillion teinture of the rose florished upon naturall alabaster, the blushe of the morne and lunaes silver showe were so lively pourtrayed, that the troyan that filles out wine to jupiter was not halfe so bewti- full: his face was full of pleasance, and al the rest of his lini- aments proportioned with such excellence, as phoebe was fettred in the sweetnes of his feature. the idea of these per- fections tumbling in her mynde made the poore shepheardesse so perplexed, as feeling a pleasure tempred with intollerable paines, and yet a disquiet mixed with a content, shee rather wished to die than to live in this amorous anguish. but wishing is litle worth in such extreames, and therefore was she forst to pine in her malady, without any salve for her sor- rows. reveale it she durst not, as daring in such matters to make none her secretarie; and to conceale it, why, it doubled her griefe for as fire supprest growes to the greater flame, and the current stopt to the more violent streame, so love smothered wrings the hart with the deeper passions. perplexed thus with sundry agonies, her food began to faile, and the disquiet of her mind began to worke a distem- perature of her body, that, to be short, phoebe fell extreme sicke, and so sicke as there was almost left no recovery of health. her father, seeing his faire phoebe thus distrest, sent for his friends, who sought by medecine to cure, and by coun- saile to pacifie, but all in vaine; for although her body was feeble through long fasting, yet did shee magis agrotare animo quâm corpore. which her friends perceyved and sorrowed at, but salve it they could not. the newes of her sicknesse was bruted abroad though all eu phues golden legacie. the forrest, which no sooner came to montanus eare, but hee, like a mad man, came to visit phoebe. where sitting by her bed side he began his exordium with so many teares and sighes, that she, perceiving the extremitie of his sorrows, be- gan now as a lover to pittie them, although ganimede helde her from redressing them. montanus craved to know the cause of her sicknesse, tempred with secret plaints, but she answered him (as the rest) with silence, having still the forme of ganimede in her mind, and conjecturing how she might reveale her loves. to utter it in wordes she found her selfe too bashfull; to discourse by any friend shee would not trust any in her amours; to remain thus perplexed still, and conceale all, it was a double death. whereupon, for her last refuge, she resolved to write unto ganimede, and therfore desired montanus to absent himselfe a while, but not to de- part, for she would see if she could steale a nappe. hee was no sooner gone out of the chamber, but reaching to her standish, shee tooke penne and paper, and wrote a letter to this effect. phoebe to ganimede, wisheth what she wants her selfe. faire shepheard (and therefore is phoebe infortunate, be- cause thou art so faire), although hitherto mine eyes were adamants to resist love, yet i no sooner saw thy face, but they became amorous to intertaine love; more devoted to fancie, than before they were repugnant to affection, addicted to the one by nature, and drawn to the other by beauty: which being rare, and made the more excellent by many vertues, hath so snared the freedome of phoebe, as shee restes at thy mercie, either to bee made the most fortunate of all maydens, or the most miserable of all women. measure not, ganimede, my loves by my wealth, nor my desires by my degrees; but thinke my thoughts as full of faith, as thy face of amiable favors. then, as thou knowest thy selfe most beautifull, suppose me eu phues golden legacie. most constant. if thou deemest mee hard harted because i hated montanus, think i was forst to it by fate: if thou saist i am kind hearted, because so lightly i loved thee at the first looke, think i was driven to it by desteny, whose influence, as it is mighty, so is it not to be resisted. if my fortunes were any thing but infortunate love, i would strive with fortune: but he that wrests against the will of venus, seekes to quench fire with oyle, and to thrust out one thorn by putting in ano- ther. if then, ganimede, love enters at the eye, harbours in the heart, and wil neither be driven out with phisicke nor reason, pittie mee, as one whose malady hath no salve but from thy sweet self, whose griefe hath no ease but through thy grant; and think i am a virgin who is deeply wrongd when i am forst to woo, and conjecture love to be strong, that is more forceable then nature. thus distressed unless by thee eased, i expect either to lyve fortunate by thy favour, or die miserable by thy denyall. living in hope. farewell. she that must be thine, or not be at all, phoebe. to this letter she annexed this sonnet. sonnetto. my boate doth passe the straights of seas incenst with fire, filde with forgetfulnesse: amidst the winters night, a blind and carelesse boy (brought up by fond desire) doth guide me in the sea of sorrow and despight. for every oare he sets a ranke of foolish thoughts, and cuts (instead of wave) a hope without distresse: eu phues golden legacie. the winds of my deepe sighes (that thunder still for noughts) have split my sayles with feare, with care and heavinesse. a mightie storme of teares, a blacke and hideous cloude, a thousand fierce disdaines doe slacke the haleyards oft: till ignorance doe pull, and errour hale the shrowds, no starre for safetie shines, no phoebe from aloft. time hath subdued art, and joy is slave to woe: alas (loves guid) be kindl what, shall i perish so? this letter and the sonnet being ended, she could find no fit messenger to send it by, and therefore she called in montanus, and intreated him to carry it to ganimede. although poore montanus saw day at a little hole, and did perceive what passion pinched her, yet (that he might seeme dutifull to his mistresse in all service) he dissembled the matter, and became a willing messenger of his owne martyrdome. and so (taking the letter) went the next morne very earlie to the plaines where aliena fedde hir flocks, and there he found ganimede, sitting under a pomegranade tree, sorrowing for the hard for- tunes of her rosader. montanus saluted him, and according to his charge delivered ganimede the letters, which (he said) came from phoebe. at this the wanton blusht, as being abasht to thinke what news should come from an unknowne shepheardesse; but taking the letters, unript the seales, and read over the discourse of phoebes fancies. when she had read and over-read them ganimede beganne to smile, and looking on montanus, fell into a great laughter, and with that called aliena, to whome shee shewed the writinges. who, having perused them, conceipted them very pleasantly, and smiled to see how love had yokt her, who before would euphues golden legacie. not stoop to the lure. aliena whispering ganimede in the eare, and saying, knew phoebe what want there were in thee to performe her will, and how unfit thy kind is to be kind to her, she would be more wise, and lesse enamoured; but leav- ing that, i pray thee let us sport with this swaine. at that word ganimede, turning to montanus, began to glaunce at him thus. i pray thee, tell me, shepheard, by those sweet thoughts and pleasing sighes that grow from my mistresse favours, art thou in love with phoebe | oh, my youth, quoth montanus, were phoebe so farre in love with me, my flocks would be more fatte, and their maister more quiet; for through the sorrows of my discontent growes the leannesse of my sheepe. alas, poore swaine, quoth ganimede, are thy passions so extreame, or thy fancie so resolute, that no reason wil blemish the pride of thy affection, and race out that which thou strivest for with- out hope nothing can make me forget phoebe, while mon- tanus forget himselfe; for those characters which true love hath stamped, neither the envie of time nor fortune can wipe away. why but, montanus, quoth ganimede, enter with a deep insight into the despaire of thy fancies, and thou shalt see the depth of thine owne follies; for (poore man) thy pro- gresse in love is a regresse to losse, swimming again the streame with the crab, and flying with apis indica against wind and weather. thou seekest with phoebus to win daphne, and shee flies faster than thou canst follow: thy desires soare with the hobbie, but her disdain reacheth higher than thou canst make wing. i tell thee, montanus, in court- ing phoebe, thou barkest with the wolves of syria against the moone, and roavest at such a marke with thy thoughts, as is beyond the pitch of thy bow, praying to love, when love is pittilesse, and thy malady remedilesse. for proofe, mon- tanus, read these letters, wherein thou shalt see thy great follyes and little hope. with that montanus tooke them and perused them, but eu phues golden legacie. with such sorrow in his lookes, as they bewrayed a sourse of confused passions in his heart: at every line his colour changed, and every sentence was ended with a period of sighes. at last, noting phoebes extreame desire toward ganimede, and her disdaine towards him, giving ganimede the letter, the shepheard stood as though he had neyther won nor lost. which ganimede perceiving wakened him out of his dreame thus: now, montanus, doest thou see thou vowest great ser- vice and obtainest but little reward: but in lieu of thy loy- altie, she maketh thee, as bellephoron, carry thine owne bane. then drinke not willingly of that potion wherein thou know- est is poyson: creepe not to her that cares not for thee. what, montanus, there are many as faire as phoebe, but most of all more courteous than phoebe. i tell thee, shepheard, favour is loves fuell: then since thou canst not get that, lette the flame vanish into smoake, and rather sorrowe for a while then re- pent thee for ever. i tell thee, ganimede, (quoth montanus) as they which are stung with the scorpion, cannot be recovered but by the scor- pion, nor he that was wounded with achilles lance bee cured but with the same truncheon, so apollo was faine to cry out that love was onely eased with love, and fancy healed by no medicine but favour. phoebus had hearbs to heale all hurts but this passion: cyrces had charms for all chances but for affection, and mercurie subtill reasons to refell all griefs but love. perswasions are bootles, reason lends no remedy, coun- sell no comfort, to such whome fancie hath made resolute; and therefore though phoebe loves ganimede, yet montanus must honor none but phoebe. then, quoth ganimede, may i rightly tearme thee a de- spairing lover, that livest without joy, and lovest without hope. but what shal i do, montanus, to pleasure thee! shall i despise phoebe, as she disdaines thee! ah (quoth montanus), that were to renew my griefs, and double my sorrows: for the sight of her discontent were the censure of my death. alas, ganimede! though i perish in my thoughts, let not her die in eu phues golden legacie. her desires. of all passions, love is most impatient: then lette not so faire a creature as phoebe sinke under the burden of so deepe distresse. being love sicke, she is proved hart sicke, and all for the beautie of ganimede. thy proportion hath intangled her affections, and she is snared in the beauty of thy excellence. then, sith she loves thee so deare, mislike not her deadly. be thou paramour to such a paragon: she hath beauty to please thine eye, and flockes to enrich thy store. thou canst not wish for more than thou shalt win by her; for she is beautifull, vertuous and wealthy, three deepe perswasions to make love frolicke. aliena seeing montanus cut it against the haire, and pleade that ganimede ought to love phoebe, when his onely life was the love of phoebe, an- swered him thus. why, montanus, dost thou further this motion, seeing if ganimede marry phoebe thy market is cleane mard ah, mistres (q. he) so hath love taught me to honour phoebe, that i would prejudice my life to pleasure her, and die in despaire rather than shee should perish for want. it shall suffice me to see her contented, and to feed mine eye on her favour. if she marry, though it bee my martyrdome, yet if she be pleased i wil brooke it with patience, and tri- umph in mine owne stars to see her desires satisfied. there- fore, if ganimede be as courteous as he is beautifull, let him shew his vertues in redressing phoebes miseries. and this montanus pronounst with such an assured countenance, that it amazed both aliena and ganimede to see the resolution of his loves; so that they pitied his passions and commended his patience, devising how they might by any subtiltie get montanus the favour of phoebe. straight (as womens heads are full of wiles) ganimede had a fetch to force phoebe to fancie the shepheard, malgrado the resolution of her minde: he prosecuted his policie thus. montanus, quoth he, seeing phoebe is so forlorne, least i might be counted unkind in not saluting so faire a creature, i will goe with thee to phoebe, and there heare her selfe in word utter that which shee hath discourst with her pen; and then, as love wils mee, i will set fu phufs golden legacie downe my censure. i will home by our house, and send coridon to accompany aliena. montanus seemed glad of this determination, and away they goe towards the house of phoebe. when they drew nigh to the cottage, montanus rai. afore, and went in and told phoebe that ganimede was at the doore. this word ganimede sounding in the eares of phoebe, drave hir into such an extasie for joy, that rising up in her bed, she was halfe revived, and her wan colour began to waxe red: and with that came ganimede in, who saluted phoebe with such a courteous looke, that it was half a salve to her sorows. sitting him downe by hir bed side, he questioned about hir disease, and where the paine chiefly helde hir! phoebe looking as lovely as venus in her night gear, tainting her face with as ruddy a blus has clitia did when shee be- wrayed her loves to phoebus, taking ganimede by the hande began thus. faire shepheard, if love were not more strong than nature, or fancie the sharpest extreame, my immodesty were the more, and my vertues the les; for nature hath framed womens eyes bashfull, their harts full of feare, and theyr tongs ful of silence; but love, that imperious love, where his power is predominant, then he perverts all, and wrests the wealth of nature to his owne wil: an instance in my selfe, fayre ganimede, for such a fire hath he kindeled in my thoughts, that to finde ease for the flame, i was forced to passe the bounds of modesty, and seek a salve at thy hands for my harms. blame me not if i be over bold, for it is thy beauty, and if i bee too forward it is fancie, and the deepe insight into thy vertues that makes me thus fond; for let me say in a word what may be contained in a volume, phoebe loves ganimede. at this shee held downe her head and wept, and ganimede rose as one that would suffer no fish to hang on his fingers, made this reply. water not thy plants, phoebe, for i do pity thy plaints, nor seek not to discover thy loves in teares, for i conjecture thy truth by thy passions: sorrow is no salve for loves, nor sighs no remedy for affection. therefore frolick, phoebe; for if ganimede can cure thee, l eu phues golden legacie. doubt not of recovery. yet this let me say without offence, that it greeves me to thwart montanus in his fancies, seeing his desires have been so resolute, and his thoughts so loyall. but thou alledgest that thou art forst from him by fate: so i tell thee, phoebe, either some starre, or else some destenie, fittes my mind, rather with adonis to die in chase, than be counted a wanton on venus knee. although i pitie thy mar- tyrdome, yet i can grant no marriage; for though i held thee fair, yet mine eie is not fettred. love grows not, like the hearb spattanna, to his perfection in one night, but creeps with the snaile, and yet at last attaines to the top. festina lenter, especially in love, for momentary fancies are often- times the fruits of follies. if, phoebe, i should like thee as the hiperborei do theyr dates, which banket with them in the morning and throw them away at night, my folly should be great, and thy repentance more. therefore i wil have time to turn my thoghts, and my loves shall growe up as the water cresses, slowly, but with a deepe roote. thus, phoebe, thou maist see i disdaine not, though i desire not; remaining indifferent til time and love makes me resolute. therefore, phoebe, seek not to suppresse affection, and with the love of montanus quench the remembraunce of ganimede: strive thou to hate mee as i seeke to like of thee, and ever have the du- ties of montanus in thy minde, for i promise thee thou mayest have one more wealthy, but not more loyall. these wordes were corasives to the perplexed phoebe, that sobbing out sighes, and straining out teares, she blubbered out these words. and shall i then have no salve of ganimede but suspence, no hope but a doubtfull hazard, no comfort, but be posted off to the will of time! justly have the gods ballanst my fortunes, who, being cruel to montanus, found ganimede as unkind to my selfe: so in forcing him perish for love, i shall die my selfe with over-much love. i am glad, quoth ganimede, you looke into your own faults, and see where your shoo wrings you, measuring now the pains of montanus by your owne passions. truth, q. phoebe, and so deeply i repent me of my eu phues golden legacie. frowardnesse towards the shepheard, that could i cease to love ganimede, i would resolve to like montanus. what if i can with reason perswade phoebe to mislike of ganimede, wil she then favour montanus! when reason (quoth she) doth quench that love i owe to thee, then will i fancie him; conditionally, that if my love can bee supprest with no reason, as being without reason, ganimede will onely wed himselfe to phoebe. i graunt it, faire shepheardesse, quoth he ; and to feed thee with the sweetnesse of hope, this resolve on: i wil never marry my selfe to woman but unto thy selfe. and with that ganimede gave phoebe a fruitlesse kisse, and such wordes of comfort, that before ganimede departed shee arose out of her bed, and made him and montanus such cheare, as could bee founde in such a country cottage, gani- mede in the midst of their banket rehearsing the promises of either in montanus favour, which highly pleased the shep- heard. thus all three content, and soothed up in hope, gani- mede tooke his leave of phoebe and departed, leaving her a contented woman, and montanus highly pleased. but poore ganimede, who had her thoughtes on her rosader, when she cald to remembrance his wounds, fild her eies full of teares, and her heart full of sorrowes, plodded to finde aliena at the folds, thinking with her presence to drive away her passions. as she came on the plaines shee might espy where rosader and saladyne sat with aliena under the shade; which sight was a salve to her griefe, and such a cordiall unto her heart, that shee tript alongst the lawnes full of joy. at last coridon, who was with them, spied ganimede, and with that the clown rose, and, running to meet him, cried, oh sirha, a match, a match! our mistres shal be maried on sun- day. thus the poore peasant frolict it before ganimede, who comming to the crue saluted them all, and especially rosader, saying that he was glad to see him so wel recovered of his wounds. i had not gone abroad so soone, quoth rosader, but that i am bidden to a marriage, which, on sunday next, must bee solempnized betweene my brother and aliena. i i eu phues golden legacie. see well where love leads delay is loathsome, and that small wooing serves where both the parties are willing. truth, quoth ganimede; but a happy day should it be, if rosader that day might be married to rosalynd. ah, good ganimede (quoth he), by naming rosalynd, renue not my sorrowes; for the thought of her perfections is the thrall of my miseries. tush; bee of good cheare, man, quoth ganimede: i have a friend that is deeply experienst in negromancy and magicke; what art can do shall be acted for thine advantage. i wil cause him to bring in rosalynde, if either france or any bord- ring nation harbour her; and upon that take the faith of a yoong shepheard. aliena smilde to see how rosader frownd, thinking that ganimede had jested with him. but, breaking off from those matters, the page (somewhat pleasant) began to discourse unto them what had past between him and phoebe; which as they laught, so they wondered at, all confessyng that there is none so chast but love will change. thus they past away the day in chat, and when the sun began to set they tooke their leaves and departed; aliena providing for their marriage day such solemne cheare and handsome roabes as fitted their country estate, and yet somewhat the better, in that rosader had promised to bring gerismond thither as a guest. ganimede (who then ment to discover herselfe before her father) had made her a gowne of green, and a kirtle of the finest sendal, in such sort that she seemed some hea- venly nymph harboured in country attire. saladyne was not behind in care to set out the nuptials, nor rosader unmindfull to bid guests, who invited gerismond and all his folowers to the feast, who willingly granted, so that there was nothing but the day wanting to his marriage. in the mean while, phoebe being a bidden guest made her self as gorgious as might be to please the eye of ganimede; and montanus suted himself with the cost of many of his flocks to be gallant against the day, for then was ganimede to give phoebe an answer of her loves, and montanus either to heare the doome of his miserie, or the censure of his hap- s eu phues golden legacie. pinesse. but while this geare was a brewing, phoebe past not one day without visiting her ganimede, so far was she wrapt in the beauties of this lovely swaine. much prattle they had, and the discourse of many passions, phoebe wish- ing for the day (as she thought) of her welfare, and gani- mede smiling to thinke what unexpected events would fall out at the wedding. in these humors the weeke went away, that at last sunday came. - no sooner did phoebus hench-man appeare in the skie, to give warning that his maisters horses should be trapt in his glorious coach, but coridon, in his holiday sute marvellous seemely, in a russet jacket, welted with the same and faced with red worsted, having a paire of blew chamblet sleeves, bound at the wrests with foure yeolow laces, closed afore very richly with a dozen of pewter buttons; his hose was of gray karsie, with a large sloppe bard over thwart the pocket holes with three faire gards, stitcht of either side with red threed; his stock was of the owne, sewed close to his breech, and for to bewtifie his hose, he had trust himselfe round with a dozen of new thredden points in medley colour: his bonnet was greene, wheron stood a copper brooch with the picture of st. denis; and to want nothing that might make him amorous in his old dayes, hee had a faire shyrt band of fine lockeram, whipt over with coventry blew of no small cost. thus at- tired, coridon bestird himselfe as chiefe stickler in these ac- tions, and had strowed al the house with flowers, that it seemed rather some of floraes choyce bowers than any coun- try cottage. thether repaired phoebe with all the maides of the forrest, to set out the bride in the most seemliest sort that might bee; but howsoever shee helpt to prancke out aliena, yet her eye was still on ganimede, who was so neat in a sute of gray, that he seemed endymion when he won luna with his lookes, or paris when he playd the swain to get the bewtie of the nymph oenone. ganimede, like a prettie page, waited on his mistresse aliena, and overlookt that all was in a readines eu phues golden legacie. against the bridegroom shuld come, who, attired in a forres- ters sute, came accompanied with gerismond and his brother rosader early in the morning, where arrived, they were so- lemnly entertained by aliena and the rest of the country swains; gerismond very highly commending the fortunate choice of saladyne, in that he had chosen a shepheardesse, whose vertues appeared in her outward bewties, being no lesse faire than seeming modest. ganimede comming in, and seeing her father, began to blush, nature woorking affects by her secret effects. scarce could she abstain from teares to see her father in so low fortunes: he that was wont to sit in his royall pallaice, attended on by twelve noble peeres, now to be contented with a simple cottage, and a troupe of revelling woodmen for his traine. the consideration of his fall made ganimede full of sorrowes; yet, that she might triumph over fortune with patience, and not any way dash that merry day with her dumps, she smothered her melancholy with a sha- dow of mirth, and verie reverently welcommed the king, not according to his former degree, but to his present estate, with such dilligence as gerismond began to commend the page for his exquisit person and excellent qualities. as thus the king with his forresters frolickt it among the shepheards, coridon came in with a faire mazer full of sidar, and presented it to gerismond with such a clownish salute that he began to smile, and tooke it of the old shepheard very kindly, drinking to aliena and the rest of her faire maydes, amongst whom phoebe was the formost. aliena pledged the king, and drunk to rosader: so the carowse went rounde from him to phoebe, &c. as they were thus drinking and ready to goe to church, came in montanus, apparalled all in tawny, to signifie that he was forsaken: on his head hee wore a garland of willow, his bottle hanged by his side, whereon was painted dispaire, and on his sheephooke hung two sonnets, as lables of his loves and fortunes. thus attired came montanus in, with his face as full of griefe as his heart was of sorowes, shewing in his counte- s : eu phues golden legacie. nance the map of extremities. as soon as the shepheards saw him, they did him all the honor they could, as being the flower of all the swaines in arden; for a bonnier boy was there not seen since that wanton wag of troy that kept sheep in ida. he seeing the king, and gessyng it to be gerismond, did him all the reverence his country curtesie could afford; insomuch that the king wondring at his attire, began to question what he was. montanus overhearing him, made this reply:—i am, sir (quoth he), loves swaine, as ful of inward discontents as i seeme fraught with outward follies. mine eyes like bees delight in sweet flowers, but sucking their fill on the faire of beauty, they carry home to the hive of my heart farre more gaul than hony, and for one drop of pure deaw, a tun full of deadly aconiton. i hunt with the fly to pursue the eagle, that flying too nigh the sun, i perish with the sun : my thoughts are above my reach, and my desires more than my fortunes, yet neither greater than my loves. but daring with phaeton, i fal with icarus; and seeking to passe the mean, i die for being so mean: my night sleeps are waking slombers, as full of sorrowes as they be far from rest; and my dayes labors are fruitlesse amors, staring at a star and stombling at a straw, leaving reason to follow after repent- ance: yet every passion is a pleasure thogh it pinch, because love hides his wormeseed in figs, his poysons in sweet po- tions, and shadows prejudize with the maske of pleasure. the wisest counsellers are my deep discontents, and i hate that which should salve my harm, like the patient which stung with the tarantula loaths musick, and yet the disease incurable but by melody. thus (sir) restlesse i hold myselfe remediles, as loving without either reward or regard, and yet loving bicause there is none worthy to be loved but the mis- tresse of my thoughts. and that i am as full of passions as i have discourst in my plaintes, sir, if you please, see my sonnets, and by them censure of my sorrowes. these wordes of montanus brought the king into a great wonder, amazed as much at his wit as at his attire, insomuch eu phues golden legacie. that he tooke the papers off his hooke, and read them to this effect. montanus first sonnet. alas! how wander i amidst these woods, whereas no day bright shine doth finde accesse; but where the melancholy fleeting floods (dark as the night) my night of woes expresse. disarmde of reason, spoilde of natures goods, without redresse to salve my heavinesse i walke, whilest thought (too cruell to my harmes), with endles grief my heedles judgement charmes. my silent tongue assailde by secret feare, my traitrous eyes imprisºned in their joy, my fatall peace devourd in fained cheare, my heart inforst to harbour in annoy, my reason robde of power by yeelding eare, my fond opinions slave to every toy. oh, love! thou guide in my uncertaine way, woe to thy bow, thy fire, the cause of my decay. et florida pungunt. when the king had read this sonnet he highly commended the device of the shepheard, that could so wittily wrap his passions in a shaddow, and so covertly conceale that which bred his chiefest discontent; affirming, that as the least shrubs have their tops, the smallest haires their shaddowes, so the meanest swaines had their fancies, and in their kynde were as charie of love as a king. whetted on with this device, he tooke the second, and read it: the effects were these— montanus second sonnet. when a dog full of rage, with his irefull eyes | frownes amidst the skies, the shepheard to asswage eu phues golden legacie. the fury of the heat, himselfe doth fafely seat by a fount full of faire, where a gentle breath (mounting from beneath) tempreth the aire. there his flocks drinke their fill, and with ease repose, whilest sweet sleepe doth close eyes from toylsome ill; but i burne without rest, no defensive power shields from phoebes lower: sorrow is my best. gentle love, lowre no more: if thou wilt invade in the secret shade, labour not so sore. i my selfe and my flocks, they their love to please, i my selfe to ease, both leave the shadie oakes: content to burne in fire, sith love doth so desire. et florida pungunt. gerismond, seeing the pithy vaine of those sonets, began to make further enquiry what he was whereupon rosader discourst unto him the love of montanus to phoebe, his great loyaltie and her deep crueltie, and how in revenge the gods had made the curious nymph amorous of yoong ganimede. upon this discourse the king was desirous to see phoebe, who being broght before gerismond by rosader, shadowed the beauty of her face with such a vermilion teinture, that the kings eyes began to dazle at the puritie of her excellence. after gerismond had fed his lookes a while upon her faire, eu phues golden legacie. he questioned with her why she rewarded montanus love with so little regard, seeing his desertes were many, and his passions extreame? phoebe, to make reply to the kings de- maund, answered thus:—love (sir) is charitie in his lawes, and whatsoever hee sets downe for justice (bee it never so unjust), the sentence cannot be reverst: womens fancies lende favours not ever by desert, but as they are inforst by their desires; for fancy is tied to the wings of fate, and what the starres decree, stands for an infallible doome. i know mon- tanus is wise, and womens ears are greatly delighted with wit, as hardly escaping the charme of a pleasant toong, as ulisses the melody of the syrens. montanus is bewtifull, and womens eyes are snared in the excellence of objects, as desirous to feede their lookes with a faire face, as the bee to suck on a sweet floure. montanus is welthy, and an ounce of give me perswades a woman more than a pound of heare me. danae was won with a golden shower, when she could not be gotten with all the intreaties of jupiter. i tell you, sir, the string of a woman's heart reacheth to the pulse of her hand; and let a man rub that with gold, and tis hard but she wil proove his hearts gold. montanus is yoong, a great clause in fancies court: montanus is vertuous, the richest argument that love yeelds; and yet knowing all these perfections, i praise them, and wonder at them, loving the qualities, but not affecting the person, because the destenies have set downe a contrary censure. yet venus, to ad revenge, hath given me wine of the same grape, a sip of the same sauce, and firing me with the like passion, hath crost me with as ill a penance; for i am in love with a shepheards swaine, as coy to mee as i am cruel to montanus, as peremptory in disdain as i was perverse in desire; and that is (quoth she) alienaes page, yong ganimede. gerismond, desirous to prosecute the ende of these pas- sions, called in ganimede, who, knowing the case, came in graced with such a blush, as beautified the christall of his face with a ruddie brightnesse. the king noting well the phismomy of ganimede, began by his favours to cal to mind eu phues golden legacie. the face of his rosalynd, and with that fetcht a deepe sigh. rosader, that was passing familiar with gerismond, demanded of him why he sighed so sore? because, rosader (quoth hee), the favour of ganimede puts mee in minde of rosalynde. at this word rosader sight so deeply, as though his heart would have burst. and whats the matter (quoth gerismond) that you quite mee with such a sigh pardon me, sir (quoth rosader), because i love none but rosalynd. and upon that condition (quoth gerismond) that rosalynd were here, i would this day make up a marriage betwixt her and thee. at this aliena turnd her head and smilde upon ganimede, and shee could scarce keep countenance. yet shee salved all with secrecie; and gerismond, to drive away his dumpes, questioned with ganimede, what the reason was he regarded not phoebes love, seeing she was as faire as the wanton that brought troy to ruine ! ganimede mildly answered, if i shuld affect the faire phoebe, i should offer poore montanus great wrong to winne that from him in a moment, that hee hath labored for so many monthes. yet have i promised to the bewtiful shepheardesse to wed my selfe never to woman except unto her; but with this promise, that if i can by reason suppresse phoebes love towards me, she shall like of none but of montanus. to that, q. phoebe, i stand; for my love is so far beyond reason, as wil admit no persuasion of reason. for justice, q, he, i appeale to gerismond: and to his censure wil i stand, q. phoebe. and in your victory, q. montanus, stands the hazard of my fortunes; for if gani- mede go away with conquest, montanus is in conceit loves monarch: if phoebe winne, then am i in effect most miserable. we wil see this controversie, q. gerismond, and then we will to church: therefore, ganimede, let us heare your argu- ment. nay, pardon my absence a while (quoth shee), and you shall see one in store. in went ganimede and drest her self in womans attire, having on a gowne of greene, with kirtle of rich sandall, so quaint, that she seemed diana triumphing in the forrest: upon her head she wore a chaplet of roses, which gave her eu phues golden legaci e. such a grace that she looked like flora pearkt in the pride of all her floures. thus attired came rosalind in, and presented hir self at hir fathers feete, with her eyes full of teares, crav- ing his blessing, and discoursing unto him all her fortunes, how shee was banished by torismond, and how ever since she lived in that country disguised. gerismond, seeing his daughter, rose from his seat and fel upon her necke, uttering the passions of his joy in watry plaints, driven into such an extasie of content, that he could not utter one word. at this sight, if rosader was both amazed and joyfull, i refer my selfe to the judgement of such as have experience in love, seeing his rosalynd before his face whom so long and deeply he had affected. at last gerismond recovered his spirites, and in most fatherly tearmes entertained his daughter rosalynd, after many questions de- manding of her what had past betweene her and rosader? so much, sir (quoth she) as there wants nothing but your grace to make up the mariage. why, then (quoth gerismond) rosader take her: shee is thine, and let this day solemnize both thy brothers and thy nuptials. rosader beyond measure content, humbly thankt the king, and imbraced his rosalynde, who turning to phoebe, demanded if she had shewen sufficient reason to suppresse the force of her loves. yea, quoth phoebe, and so great a perswasive, that if it please you madame and aliena to give us leave, montanus and i will make this day the thirde couple in marriage. she had no sooner spake this word, but montanus threw away his garland of willow, his bottle, where was painted dispaire, and cast his sonnets in the fire, shewing himselfe as frolicke as paris when he han- seled his love with helena. at this gerismond and the rest smiled, and concluded that montanus and phoebe should keepe their wedding with the two brethren. aliena seeing saladyne stand in a dumpe, to wake him from his dreame began thus. why how now, my saladyne, all a mort! what melancholy, man, at the day of marriage! perchaunce thou art sorrowfull to thinke on thy brothers high fortunes, and thyne owne base desires to chuse so meane a shepheardize. cheare fu phufs golden legacie. up thy hart, man; for this day thou shalt bee married to the daughter of a king; for know, saladyne, i am not aliena, but alinda, the daughter of thy mortal enemie torismond. at this all the company was amazed, especially gerismond, who rising up, tooke alinda in his armes, and said to rosalynd, is this that faire alinda famous for so many vertues, that forsake her fathers court to live with thee exilde in the country! the same, q. rosalynde. then, quoth gerismond, turning to saladyne, jolly forrester be frolick, for thy fortunes are great, and thy desires excellent: thou hast got a princesse as famous for her perfection, as exceeding in proportion. and she hath with her beauty won (quoth saladyne) an humble servant, as full of faith as she of amiable favour. while every one was amazed with these comicall eventes, coridon came skipping in, and told them that the priest was at church, and tarried for their comming. with that gerismond led the way, and the rest followed; where to the admiration of all the countrey swains in arden their mariages were solemnly so- lemnized. as soone as the priest had finished, home they went with alinda, where coridon had made all things in readines. dinner was provided, and the tables being spread, and the brides set downe by gerismond, rosader, saladyne, and montanus that day were servitors: homely cheare they had, such as their country could affoord, but to mend their fare they had mickle good chat, and many discourses of their loves and fortunes. about mid dinner, to make them mery, coridon came in with an old crowd, and plaid them a fit of mirth, to which he sung this pleasant song. coridons song. a blyth and bonny country lasse, heigh ho, the bonny lasse! sate sighing on the tender grasse and weeping said, will none come woo me? a smicker boy, a lyther swaine, heigh ho, a smicker swaine! . that in his love was wanton faine, with smiling looks straight came unto her. eu phues golden legacie. when, as the wanton wench espied, heigh ho, when she espied' the meanes to make her selfe a bride, she simpred smooth like bonny bell: the swaine, that saw her squint eied kind, heigh ho, squint eyed kind! his armes about her body twind, and, faire lasse, how fare ye, well? the country kit said, well, forsooth, heigh ho, well forsooth ! but that i have a longing tooth, a longing tooth that makes me crie: alas! said he, what garres thy grief? heigh ho, what garres thy grief? a wound, quoth she, without reliefe, i fear a maid that i shall die. if that be all, the shepheard said, heigh ho, the shepheard said! he make thee wive it gentle mayd, and so recure thy maladie. hereon they kist with many a oath, heigh ho, with many a oath ! and fore god pan did plight their troath, and to the church they hied them fast. and god send every pretie peate, heigh ho, the pretie peateſ that feares to die of this conceate, so kind a friend to helpe at last. coridon having thus made them merry, as they were in the midst of their jollitie, word was brought in to saladyne and rosader that a brother of theirs, one fernandine, was arived, and desired to speake with them. gerismond over- hearing this newes, demaunded who it was . it is, sir (q. rosader) our middle brother, that lives a scholler in paris; but what fortune hath driven him to seek us out i know not. with that saladine went and met his brother, whom he welcommed with all curtesie, and rosader gave him no lesse frendly entertainment: brought he was by his two brothers into the parlour where they all sate at dinner. fernandine, eu phues golden legacie. as one that knew as many maners, as he could points of so- phistry, and was as wel brought up as well lettered, saluted them all. but when he espied gerismond, kneeling on his knee, he did him what reverence belonged to his estate, and with that burst forth into these speaches. although (right mighty prince) this day of my brothers marriage be a daye of mirth, yet time craves another course; and therefore from dantie cates rise to sharpe weapons. and you, the sonnes of sir john of bourdeaux, leave off your amors and fal to arms: change your loves into lances, and now this day shew your selves valiant, as hitherto you have been passionate. for know, gerismond, that harde by at the edge of this forrest the twelve peeres of france are up in arms to recover thy right; and torismond, troupt with a crue of desperate runnagates, is ready to bid them battaile. the armies are ready to joyne: therefore shewe thy selfe in the field to in- courage thy subjects. and you, saladyne and rosader, mount you, and shew your selves as hardy soldiers as you have been harty lovers: so shal you for the benefit of your country, dis- cover the idea of your fathers vertues to be stamped in your thoughts, and prove children worthy of so honorable a parent. at this alarum, given him by fernandine, gerismond leapt from the boord, and saladyne and rosader betooke them- selves to their weapons. nay (q. gerismond) go with me: i have horse and armor for us all, and then, being well mounted, let us shew that we carry revenge and honor at our fauchons points. thus they leave the brides full of sorrow, and especially alinda, who desired gerismond to be good to her father: hee, not returning a word because his hast was great, hied him home to his lodge, wher he delivered saladyne and rosader horse and armour, and himselfe armed royally led the way, not having ridden two leagues before they dis- covered where in a valley both the battailes were joyned. gerismond seeing the wing wherein the peeres fought, thrust in there, and cryed s. denis' laying on such load upon his enemies, that he shewed how highly he did estimate of a crowne. when the peeres perceived that their lawful king eu phues golden legacie. was there, they grew more eager; and saladyne and rosader so behaved themselves, that none durst stand in their way, nor abide the furie of their weapons. to be short, the peeres were conquerors, torismonds army put to flight, and himself slain in battaile. the peers then gathered themselves to- gether, and saluted their king, conducted him royally into paris, where he was received with great joy of all the citti- zens. assoone as all was quiet, and he had received againe the crowne, he sent for alinda and rosalynd to the court, alinda being very passionat for the death of her father, yet brooking it with the more patience, in that she was contented with the welfare of her saladyne. wel, assoone as they were come to paris, gerismond made a royal feast for the peeres and lords of his land, which continued thirtie dayes, in which time summoning a parliament, by the consent of his nobles, he created rosader heire apparant to the kingdome: hee restored saladyne to all his fathers land, and gave him the dukedome of nameurs: he made fernandine principall secretarie to himselfe; and that fortune might every way seeme frolicke, he made montanus lord over all the forrest of arden, adam spencer captaine of the kings gard, and coridon maister of alindas flocks. heere, gentlemen, may you seein euphues golden legacie, that such as neglect their fathers precepts, incur much preju- dice; that division in nature, as it is a blemish in nurture, so tis a breach of good fortunes; that vertue is not measured by birth but by action; that yonger brethren, though inferiour in yeares, yet may bee superiour to honors; that concord is the sweetest conclusion, and amity betwixt brothers more forceable than fortune. if you gather any fruits by this le- gacie, speake wel of euphues for writing it, and me for fetch- ing it. if you grace me with that favor, you incorage me to be more froward: and assoone as i have overlookt my labors, expect the sailers kalender. th. lodge. finis. notes. p. , l. , “the schedule annexed to euphues testament" is not in the edition of , but was first added to that of . it appears in all the subsequent impressions that have fallen under our notice. p. , l. , ought we not to read unitie for vanitie, as it stands in the old copies? p. , . , “having the prime,” &c. “having passed the prime,” &c. edit. . p. , . , “essential fortune of his proportion,” edit. , reads “essentiall forme,” which is no doubt right. p. , . , “the baarran leafe.” edit. reads “the baatan leafe.” p. , l. , the edit. reads “honour” for “humour,” which is, perhaps, right. p. , . , “as, quoth hee,” &c. the edit. of has it “alas, quoth hee,” which must be the true reading. p. , l. , “ lap holde on him:” the correct reading seems to be “lay holde on him,” and so it stands in the edit. . p. , l. , “the dead mens graves:” the edit. of reads “the dead men graves,” which seems right. p. , l. . this stanza is clearly surplusage, and is made up, by error of the printer, from parts of the preceding and succeeding stanzas. the poem is correctly given in the edit. of , consisting of only four stanzas. p. , l. , “greet so sore,” or “grede so sore,” is “cry so sore.” this pastoral has several other achaisms, as “lorell” for lost, “herry” for bless or praise, “for thy" for therefore, &c. and is obviously written in imitation of spenser. p. , l. , “as we exceed not ill dyet"—so both the edit. of and ; but ought we not to read “in dyet?” p. , l. , “it chaunced that day:" the edit. of reads “it hapued that day." p. , l. , “but the lord of the feast." the word be seems to have dropped out after but. p. , l. , “as it were:" the edit. of reads “if it were," which seems right. p. , l. , “this newes drive the king.” the edit. of has it “drace,” which, of course, is the correct reading. k notes. p. , l. . the edit. of reads still more corruptly “pale- footed;” but the true word is “polt-footed.” p. , l. , “when love himselfe:" the edit. of more correctly reads “where love himselfe.” p. , l. , “which applying:” the true reading is “with apply- ing,” and so it stands in the edit. . p. , l. . ought we not to read reaching instead of watching p. , l. , ganimede is misprinted for rosader in the editions of and . p. , l. . the edit. of properly reads is instead of “are sold,” as it stands in the copy of . p. , l. . we ought to read “than any wooll more softer.” p. , l. . the edit. of reads, no doubt correctly, mill for “ will.” p. , l. , for “touch in my estate,” the edit. of reads “couch in my estate." p. , l. . a word (perhaps seem) has evidently dropped out in this line, and it is not supplied by the old copies. p. , l. . perhaps this is the oldest instance of the use of the word fop in our language, although shakespeare has it in “king lear." it means a foolish fellow. the sentence in the text ought obviously to run thus, “ or so foolish that she forgets, like a fop, that she must have a large harvest for a little corne.” p. , l. . the edit. of reads “if thou measurest," which seems right. p. , l. . lodge appears to have been rather vain of his french compositions, and this is not the only instance in which he has intro- duced them, either in his own works or as laudatory of those of others. to put french verses into the mouth of montanus is a gross piece of indecorum as respects the preservation of character. p. , l. , “condemne mee for an abject” seems the true reading, and we have before had the same species of antithesis. p. , l. , for kistresse, as it is printed in the old editions, we ought to read kistrelle. p. , l. . the edit. of reads “in not salving so faire a creature.” p. , l. , “home to our house,” edit. . p. , . . the edit. of reads amongst for “alongst." p. , l. , “but what a happy day,” is the reading of edit. . p. , , . the edit. of reads, no doubt correctly, “when the dog,” &c. p. , . . ought we not rather to read “love (sir) is charie in his lawes,” though not supported by the old copies? the h is to r y of h a m l e t, prince of denmark; upon which shakespeare is supposed to have founded his tragedy. reprinted from the only known copy, published in . london : thomas rodd, , great newport street, midcccxli. introduction. the only known copy of the following novel is preserved among capell's books, at cambridge, and bears date in : it was printed by richard bradocke, for thomas pavier, a well-known stationer of that time. there can be little doubt that it had originally come from the press considerably before the commencement of the seventeenth century, although the multiplicity of readers of productions of the kind, and the carelessness with which such books were regarded after peru- sal, has led to the destruction, as far as can now be ascer- tained, of every earlier copy. that which we have used for our re-impression, of a considerably later date, has alone escaped. should any accident unluckily befall that interest- ing and valuable relic, the misfortune could never be repaired; and it seems almost a matter of duty, therefore, accurately to reprint such productions, that they may not at any future time be utterly lost. that a play upon the story of hamlet had been written some years before , we have every reason to believe. robert greene (according to mr. dyce, whom it is generally safe to follow, especially on questions of date) published his iv introduction. “menaphon” in , prefixing to it an epistle by thomas nash, in which he alludes to a tragedy of that name; and on the th june , henslowe registers in his ms. diary, preserved at dulwich college, that “hamlet” was performed by his company, while acting at newington butts, apparently, in conjunction with the association to which shakespeare belonged: it was then an old play, and produced him only eight shillings as his share of the receipts; though, when new pieces were represented, his proportion at the same period was usually more than three pounds. malone, who erred as to the date of greene's “menaphon" (shakesp. by boswell, ii, ) confidently, though conjecturally, assigned the “hamlet,” spoken of by nash and mentioned by henslowe, to thomas kyd : it is often alluded to by contemporaries, and there is not a moment's doubt that it was written and acted many years before shakespeare's tragedy of the same name was produced. it is most probable that kyd's play (sup- posing it to be his) was founded upon the novel under con- sideration, which, therefore, must have been originally printed before , and that, to a certain extent, our great dramatist availed himself both of the old drama and of the still older “history.” an earlier copy of shakespeare's “hamlet” than that with which malone was acquainted has turned up comparatively recently, and is now in the library of the duke of devon- shire; but it was not deposited among the extraordinary rarities of that now matchless dramatic collection, until, by permission of his grace, a reprint had been made of it, we believe under the superintendence of messrs. payne and foss, introduction. v of pall mall. it is one of the most faithful and accurate re- impressions ever completed, and a minute collation of it with the original only detected two or three trifling literal variations. this quarto bears date in , and it was printed by n. l. (nicholas ling), who was interested in the known quarto of , which, until this discovery was made, was looked upon as the first edition of shakespeare's “ham- let.” from a careful comparison of the two, it seems nearly certain that the copy of was printed from ms. taken down in short-hand from the players' mouths, as the dialogue was delivered on the stage; and the additional lines there found were, for some reason, omitted in the more authentic edition published in the succeeding year. we are well sa- tisfied that the “hamlet” of was not shakespeare's first draught of the tragedy, which he enlarged and improved as it appeared in . it will be found that the tragedy varies in many important particulars from the novel, especially towards the conclusion; that nearly the whole conduct of the story is different; that the catastrophe is totally dissimilar, and that the character of the hero in the prose narrative is utterly degraded below the rank he is entitled to take in the commencement. the murder of hamlet's father, the marriage of his mother with the murderer, hamlet's pretended madness, his interview with his mother, and his voyage to england, are nearly the only points in common. we thus are able to see how far shakespeare followed the “history;” but we shall probably never be able to ascertain to what extent he made use of the antecedent play. vi introduction. the prose narrative of is a bald, literal, and, in many respects, uncouth translation from the histoires tragiques of belleforest, who was himself by no means an elegant writer for the time in which he lived: he began publishing his series of novels in , and his story of “amleth" was professedly copied from an earlier author, whom he does not name, but who was either saxo grammaticus, or some writer, who had intermediately borrowed the incidents, and converted them to his own purposes. belleforest gives it the following title:– avec quelle ruse amleth, qui depuis fut roy de danne- march, vengea la mort de son pere horvuendile, occis par fengon, son frere, et autre occurrence de son histoire. the english translator, especially in the descriptive portion of his work, has multiplied all the faults of belleforest, including his lengthened and involved periods, and his frequent con- fusion of persons. it may be suspected that one or two of the longer speeches, and particularly the oration of hamlet, occupying nearly the whole of chapter vi, was by another and a better hand, who had a more complete knowledge of french, and a happier use of his own language. we need not have much hesitation in believing that the oldest copy (perhaps printed about the year ) was suf- ficiently corrupt in its readings; but the corruptions increased with the re-impressions, and a few portions of the edition of seem almost to defy correction. some passages might be rendered more intelligible, such as “distill a field of tears" (p. ), instead of “distill a flood of tears”—“deface his desire of revenge” (p. ), instead of “deferre his desire of revenge"—“she thought fit for no men but herself” (p. ), introduction. vii instead of “she thought fit for no one but herself”—“desired she to see" (p. ), instead of “desired her to see"—“with- out and any faithfull assurance” (p. ), instead of “ with- out any faithfull assurance,” &c.; but it was thought best to present the curious relic, as nearly as it could be done, in the shape and state in which it issued from the press not quite two centuries and a half ago. for this reason it has not been considered right to make the orthography of the name of the hero uniform: sometimes he is called hamblet (as, no doubt, it stood in the first impression), and at other times hamlet, as we have every reason to suppose it was altered in the old play, and as we find it in shakespeare. all the introductory matter to the ensuing pages is by belleforest, the translator having deemed it necessary to pre- serve the french “argument,” and to convert some prelimi- nary observations into what he terms a “preface.” the hy s to rie () f h a m b l e t. london : imprinted by richard bradocke, for thomas parier, and are to be sold at his shop in corne-hill, neere to the royall exchange. . the argument. it is not at this present, neither yet a small time since, the dou. of rule caus- that envy raigning in the worlde hath in such sort blinded ºn"...". men, that without respect of consanguinitie, friendship, or ; º: favour whatsoever, they forget themselves so much as that they spared not to defile their hands with the blood of those men, who by all law and right they ought chiefly to defend and cherish. for what other impression was it that entered into romulus heart, when, under pretence of i know not what lawe, he defiled his hands with the blood of his owne brother, but the abhominable vice of desire to raigne? which, if in all the accurrences, prosperities, and circumstances thereof, it were well wayed and considered, i know not any man that had not rather live at his ease, and privately without charge, then, being feared and honored of all men, to beare all the charge and burden upon his shoulders; to serve and please n ... the fantasies of the common people; to live continually in . .". feare, and to see himself exposed to a thousand occasions of hi. " danger, and most commonly assailed and spoiled when hee thinkes verily to hold fortune as slave to his fantasies and will, and yet buyes such and so great misery for the vaine and fraile pleasures of this world, with the losse of his owne soule; making so large a measure of his conscience, that it is not once mooved at any murther, treason, deceit, nor wicked- nes whatsoever he committed, so the way may be opened and made plaine unto him, whereby hee may attaine to that miser- a.m. able felicitie, to command and governe a multitude of men ... "... no cause, (as i said of romulus), who, by a most abhominable action, |... ." prepared himselfe a way to heaven (but not by vertue). the ambitious and seditious orator of rome supposed the xii argument. degrees and steps to heaven, and the wayes to vertue, to consist in the treasons, ravishments, and massacres committed by him that first layd the foundations of that citty. and not to leave the hystories of rome, what, i pray you, incited ancius martinus to massacre tarquin the elder, but the desire of raigning as a king, who before had bin the onely man to move and solicite the saide tarquinius to bereave the right heires and inheriters thereof." what caused tarquinius the proud traiterously to imbrue his hands in the blood of servius tullius, his father in law, but onely that fumish and un- bridled desire to be commander over the cittie of rome! which practise never ceased nor discontinued in the said prin- cipall cittie of the empire, as long as it was governed by the greatest and wisest personages chosen and elected by the people; for therein have been seen infinite numbers of sedi- tions, troubles, pledges, ransommings, confiscations and mas- sacres, onely proceeding from this ground and principle, which entereth into mens hearts, and maketh them covet and desirous to be heads and rulers of a whole common wealth. and after the people were deprived of that libertie of election, and that the empire became subject to the pleasure and fantasie of one man, commanding al the rest, i pray you peruse their bookes, and read diligently their hystories, and do but looke into the meanes used by the most part of their kings and em- perours to attaine to such power and authoritie, and you shall see how poysons, massacres, and secret murthers, were the meanes to push them forwards that durst not openly attempt it, or else could not compasse to make open warres. and for that the hystory (which i pretend to shew unto you) is chiefly grounded upon treason, committed by one brother against the other, i will not erre far out of the matter; thereby desiring to shew you, that it is and hath been a thing long since practised and put in use by men, to spill the blood of their neerest kinsmen and friends to attaine to the honour of being great and in authoritie; and that there hath bin some, that being impatient of staying till their just time of succes- argument. xiii sion, have hastened the death of their owne parents: as ab- ...” solon would have done to the holy king david, his father; iº" and as wee read of domitian, that poysoned his brother titus, the most curtious and liberall prince that ever swayed the empire of rome. and god knowes we have many the like examples in this our time, where the sonne conspired against the father; for that sultan zelin, emperour of turkes, was nº." so honest a man, that fearing baiazeth, his father, would die baiareth. of his naturall death, and that thereby he should have stayd too long for the empire, bereaved him of his life; and sultan soliman soliman, his successor, although he attempted not any thing tº ºr against his father, yet being mooved with a certaine feare to tºº,” “ bee deposed from his emperie, and bearing a hatred to mus- tapha, his son (incited therunto by rustain bassa, whom the jewes, enemies to the yong prince, had by gifts procured thereunto), caused him to be strangled with a bowe string, without hearing him (that never had offended his father) once speake to justifie his innocencie. butlet us leave the turkes, like barbarians as they are, whose throne is ordinarily esta- blished by the effusion of the blood of those that are neerest of kindred and consanguinitie to the empire, and consider what tragedies have bin plaid to the like effect in the me- morie of our ancestors, and with what charitie and love the neerest kindreds and friends among them have bin inter- tained. one of the other, if you had not the hystories extant a.º.". before you, if the memorie were not in a manner fresh, and age. known almost to every man, i would make a long discourse thereof; but things being so cleare and evident, the truth so much discovered, and the people almost, as it were, glutted with such treasons, i will omit them, and follow my matter, to shew you that, if the iniquitie of a brother caused his bro- ther to loose his life, yet that vengeance was not long after god staveth delayed; to the end that traitors may know, although the h. yet reveng- punishment of their trespasses committed be stayed for awhile, º, yet that they may assure themselves that, without all doubt, "...". they shal never escape the puisant and revenging hand of;..." xiv argument. god; who being slow to anger, yet in the ende doth not faile to shew some signes and evident tokens of his fearefull judge- ment upon such as, forgetting their duties, shed innocent blood, and betray their rulers, whom they ought chiefly to honour, serve, and reverence. the p. r. e. f. a. c. e. although in the beginning of this hystorie i had de- termined not to have troubled you with any other matter than a hystorie of our owne time, having sufficient tragicall matter to satisfie the minds of men; but because i cannot wel discourse thereof without touching many personages whom i would not willingly displease, and partly because the argument that i have in hand, seemed unto me a thing worthy to bee offered to our french nobilitie, for the great and gallant accurrences therein set downe, i have some- what strayed from my course, as touching the tragedies of this our age, and, starting out of france and over neither- landers countries, i have ventured to visit the hystories of denmarke, that it may serve for an example of vertue and contentment to our nation (whom i specially seeke to please), and for whose satisfaction i have not left any flower what- soever untasted, from whence i have not drawne the most perfect and delicate hony, thereby to bind them to my dili- gence herein; not caring for the ingratitude of the time pre- sent, that leaveth (as it were rejecteth) without recompence such as serve the common wealth, and by their travell and diligence honour their countrey, and illustrate the realme of france: so that oftentimes the fault proceedeth rather from xvi preface. them, then from the great personages that have other affaires which withdraw them from things that seeme of small con- sequence. withall, esteeming my selfe more than satisfied in this contentment and freedome which i now injoy, being loved of the nobilitie, for whom i travell without grudging, favoured of men of learning and knowledge, for admiring and reverencing them according to their worthinesse, and honoured of the common people, of whom, although i crave not their judgement, as not esteeming them of abilitie to eternize the name of a worthy man, yet i account my selfe sufficiently happy to have attained to this felicitie, that few or no men refuse, or disdaine to reade my workes, many ad- miring and wondering thereat; as there are some that, pro- voked by envie, blame and condemne it. to whom i con- fesse my selfe much bound and beholding, for that by their meanes i am the more vigelant, and so by my travell much more beloved and honored then ever i was; which to mee is the greatest pleasure that i can injoy, and the most abundant treasures in my coffers, wherewith i am more satisfied and contented then (if without comparison) i enjoyed the greatest treasures in all asia. now, returning to our matter, let us beginne to declare the hystorie. the hystorie of hamblet, prince of denmarke. c h a p. i. how horvendile and fengon were made governours of the province of ditmarse, and how horvendile marryed geruth, the daughter to roderick, chief k. of denmark, by whom he had hamblet: and how after his marriage his brother fengon slewe him trayterously, and marryed his brothers wife, and what followed. you must understand, that long time before the kingdome of denmark received the faith of jesus christ, and imbraced the danes the doctrin of the christians, that the common people in those ºut dayes were barbarous and uncivill, and their princes cruell, "" without faith or loyaltie, seeking nothing but murther, and de- posing (or at the least) offending each other, either in honours, "...". goods, or lives; not caring to ransome such as they tooke "*". prisoners, but rather sacrificing them to the cruell vengeance naturally imprinted in their hearts: in such sort, that if ther were sometime a good prince or king among them, who beeing adorned with the most perfect gifts of nature, would adict himselfe to vertue, and use courtesie, although the peo- ple held him in admiration (as vertue is admirable to the most wicked) yet the envie of his neighbors was so great, that they never ceased untill that vertuous man were dispatched out of the world. king rodericke, as then raigning in denmarke, º: after hee had appeased the troubles in the countrey, and driven marke. l the hystorie of hamblet, jutie at this time, called then dit- inarsse. h or vendile a king and a pirate. collere king of norway. horvendile slew collere. the sweathlanders and slaveans from thence, he divided the kingdom into divers provinces, placing governours therein; who after (as the like happened in france) bare the names of dukes, marqueses, and earls, giving the government of jutie (at this present called ditmarsse) lying upon the conntrey of the cimbrians, in the straight or narrow part of land that sheweth like a point or cape of ground upon the sea, which neithward bordereth upon the countrey of norway, two va- liant and warlike lords horvendile and fengon, sonnes to gervendile, who likewise had beene governour of that pro- vince. now the greatest honor that men of noble birth could at that time win and obtaine, was in exercising the art of piracie upon the seas, assayling their neighbours, and the countries bordering upon them; and how much the more they used to rob, pill, and spoyle other provinces, and ilands far adjacent, so much the more their honours and reputation in- creased and augmented: wherin horvendile obtained the highest place in his time, beeing the most renouned pirate that in those dayes scoured the seas and havens of the north parts: whose great ſame so mooved the heart of collere, king of norway, that he was much grieved to heare that horven- dile surmounting him in feates of armes, thereby obscuring the glorie by him alreadie obtained upon the seas: (honor more than covetousnesse of richer (in those dayes) being the reason that provoked those barbarian princes to overthrow and van- quish one the other, not caring to be slaine by the handes of a victorious person). this valiant and hardy king having challenged horvendile to fight with him body to body, the combate was by him accepted, with conditions, that hee which should be vanquished should loose all the riches he had in his ship, and that the vanquisher should cause the body of the vanquished (that should bee slaine in the combate) to be ho- nourably buried, death being the prise and reward of him that should loose the battaile; and to conclude, collere, king of norway (although a valiant, hardy, and couragious prince) was in the end vanquished and slaine by horvendile, who prince of den marke. presently caused a tombe to be erected, and therein (with all honorable obsequies fit for a prince) buried the body of king collere, according to their auncient manner and superstitions in these dayes, and the conditions of the combate, bereaving the kings shippes of all their riches; and having slaine the kings sister, a very brave and valiant warriour, and over runne all the coast of norway, and the northern ilands, re- turned home againe layden with much treasure, sending the most part thereof to his soveraigne, king rodericke, thereby to procure his good liking, and so to be accounted one of the greatest favourites about his majestie. the king, allured by those presents, and esteeming himselfe happy to have so valiant a subject, sought by a great favour and coutesie to make him become bounden unto him per- hamlet petually, giving him geruth his daughter to his wife, of whom someº. he knew horvendile to bee already much inamored. and the more to honor him, determined himselfe in person to conduct her into jutie, where the marriage was celebrated according to the ancient manner: and to be briefe, of this marriage pro- ceeded hamblet, of whom i intend to speake, and for his cause have chosen to renew this present hystorie. fengon, brother to this prince horvendile, who [not] onely fretting and despighting in his heart at the great honor and re- putation wonne by his brother in warlike affaires, but solicited his and provoked by a foolish jealousie to see him honored withi royall aliance, and fearing thereby to bee deposed from his part of the government, or rather desiring to be onely gover- nour, thereby to obscure the memorie of the victories and conquests of his brother horvendile, determined (whatsoever happened) to kill him; which hee effected in such sort, that no man once so much as suspected him, every man esteeming that from such and so firme a knot of alliance and consan- guinitie there could proceed no other issue then the full effects of vertue and courtesie: but (as i sayd before) the desire of bearing soveraigne rule and authoritie respecteth neither blood nor amitie, nor caring for vertue, as being vendile. fengon, conspira- against s brother. l the hystorie of hamblet, if a man be deceived by a woman, it is lis owne beastlinesse. easily support the crosses they endure, without complaining so often and so strangely, seeing it is their owne beastlinesse that overthrowes them. for if it be so, that a woman is so imperfect a creature as they make her to be, and that they know this beast to bee so hard to bee tamed as they affirme, why then are they so foolish to preserve them, and so dull and brutish as to trust their deceitfull and wanton imbrace- ings. but let us leave her in this extreamitie of lacivious- nesse, and proceed to shewe you in what sort the yong prince hamblet behaved himselfe, to escape the tyranny of his uncle. chap. ii. how hamblet counterfeited the mad man, to escape the tyrannie of his uncle, and how he was tempted by a woman (through his uncles procurement) who thereby thought to undermine the prince, and by that meanes to finde out whether he counterfeited madnesse or not : and how hamblet would by no meanes bee brought to consent unto her, and what followed. geruth having (as i sayd before) so much forgotten her- self, the prince hamblet perceiving himself to bee in dan- ger of his life, as beeing abandoned of his owne mother, and forsaken of all men, and assuring himselfe that fengon would not detract the time to send him the same way his father horvendile was gone, to beguile the tyrant in his sub- tilties (that esteemed him to bee of such a minde that if he once attained to mans estate he wold not long delay the time to revenge the death of his father) counterfeiting the mad man prince of denmarke. with such craft and subtill practises, that hee made shewe as if hee had utterly lost his wittes: and under that vayle hee covered his pretence, and defended his life from the treasons and practises of the tyrant his uncle. and all though hee had beene at the schoole of the romane prince, who, because hee counterfeited himselfe to bee a foole, was called brutus, yet hee imitated his fashions, and his wisedom. for every day beeing in the queenes palace, (who as then was more carefull to please her whoremaster, then ready to revenge the cruell death of her husband, or to restore her sonne to his inheritance), hee rent and tore his clothes, wallowing and lying in the durt and mire, his face all filthy and blacke, running through the streets like a man distraught, not speak- ing one worde, but such as seemed to proceede of madnesse and meere frenzie; all his actions and jestures beeng no other than the right countenances of a man wholly deprived of all reason and understanding, in such sort, that as then hee seemed fitte for nothing but to make sport to the pages and ruffling courtiers that attended in the court of his uncle and father-in-law. but the yong prince noted them well enough, minding one day to bee revenged in such manner, that the memorie thereof should remaine perpetually to the world. beholde, i pray you, a great point of a wise and brave spirite in a yong prince, by so great a shewe of imperfection in his person for advancement, and his owne imbasing and despising, to worke the meanes and to prepare the way for himselfe to bee one of the happiest kings in his age. in like sort, never any man was reputed by any of his actions more wise and prudent then brutus, dissembling a great alteration in his minde, for that the occasion of such his de- vise of foolishnesse proceeded onely of a good and mature counsell and deliberation, not onely to preserve his goods, and shunne the rage of the proude tyrant, but also to open a large way to procure the banishment and utter ruine of wicked tarquinius, and to infranchise the people (which were before brutus es- teemed wise, for counter- feiting the foole. read titus livius and halicar- tlassius. prince of den marke. ciall to their prince, saying, that under colour of such rudenes he shadowed a crafty pollicy, and by his devised simplicitye, he concealed a sharp and pregnant spirit: for which cause they counselled the king to try and know, if it were possible, how to discover the intent and meaning of the yong prince; and they could find no better nor more fit invention to intrap him, then to set some faire and beawtifull woman in a secret place, that with flattering speeches and all the craftiest meanes she could use, should purposely seek to allure his mind to have his pleasure of her: for the nature of all young men, (especi- ally such as are brought up wantonlie) is so transported with º: the desires of the flesh, and entreth so greedily into the plea- sures therof, that it is almost impossible to cover the foul af- fection, neither yet to dissemble or hyde the same by art or industry, much lesse to shunne it. what cunning or sub- tilty so ever they use to cloak theire pretence, seeing occa- sion offered, and that in secret, especially in the most inticing sinne that rayneth in man, they cannot chuse (being con- strayned by voluptuousnesse) but fall to naturall effect and subtilties working. to this end certaine courtiers were appointed to "...º.º. leade hamblet into a solitary place within the woods, whether “” they brought the woman, inciting him to take their pleasures together, and to imbrace one another, but the subtill practises used in these our daies, not to try if men of great account bee extract out of their wits, but rather to deprive them of strength, otº vertue and wisedome, by meanes of such devilish practi- º," tioners, and inteſernall spirits, their domestical servants, and º. ministers of corruption. and surely the poore prince at this assault had him in great danger, if a gentleman (that in horvendiles time had been nourished with him) had not showne himselfe more affectioned to the bringing up he had received with hamblet, then desirous to please the tirant, who by all meanes sought to intangle the sonne in the same nets wherein the father had ended his dayes. this gentle- man bare the courtyers (appointed as aforesaide of this treason) company, more desiring to give the prince instruc- the historie of hamblet, tion what he should do, then to intrap him, making full ac- count that the least showe of perfect sence and wisedome that hamblet should make would be sufficient to cause him to loose his life: and therefore by certain signes, he gave hamblet intelligence in what danger hee was like to fall, if by any meanes hee seemed to obaye, or once like the wanton toyes and vicious provocations of the gentlewoman sent thither by his uncle. which much abashed the prince, as then wholy beeing in affection to the lady, but by her he was likewise informed of the treason, as being one that from her infancy loved and favoured him, and would have been ex- ceeding sorrowfull for his misfortune, and much more to leave his companie withoutinjoying the pleasure of his body, whome shee loved more than herselfe. the prince in this sort having both deceived the courtiers, and the ladyes expectation, that affirmed and swore that hee never once offered to have his pleasure of the woman, although in subtilty hee affirmed the contrary, every man there upon assured themselves that without all doubt he was distraught of his sences, that his braynes were as then wholly void of force, and incapable of reasonable apprehension, so that as then fengons practise took no effect: but for al that he left not off, still seeking by al meanes to finde out hamblets subtilty, as in the next chapter you shall perceive. prince of denmarke. chap. iii. how fengon, uncle to hamblet, a second time to intrap him in his politick madnes, caused one of his counsellors to be secretly hidden in the queenes chamber, behind the arras, to heare what speeches passed between hamblet and the queen; and how hamblet killed him, and escaped that danger, and what followed. among the friends of fengon, there was one that above al the rest doubted of hamblets practises in counterfeiting the madman, who for that cause said, that it was impossible that so craftie a gallant as hamblet, that counterfeited the foole, another - - - subtilty used should be discovered with so common and unskilfull practises, ..." which might easily bee perceived, and that to finde out his po- hamblet. litique pretence it were necessary to invent some subtill and crafty meanes, more attractive, whereby the gallant might not have the leysure to use his accustomed dissimulation; which to effect he said he knewe a fit waie, and a most con- venient meane to effect the kings desire, and thereby to intrap hamblet in his subtilties, and cause him of his owne accord to fall into the net prepared for him, and thereby evidently shewe his secret meaning. his devise was thus, that king fengon should make as though he were to goe some long voyage concerning affaires of great importance, and that in the meane time hamblet should be shut up alone in a chamber with his mother, wherein some other should secretly be hidden behind the hangings, unknowne either to him or his mother, there to stand and heere their speeches, and the complots by them to bee taken concerning the accomplishment of the dis- sembling fooles pretence; assuring the king that if there were any point of wisedome and perfect sence in the gallants spirit, that without all doubte he would easily discover it to his mother, as being devoid of all feare that she would utter or , the hystorie of hamblet, hamblets subtilty. a cruell re- venge taken by hamblet upon him that would have betraid him. make knowne his secret intent, beeing the woman that had borne him in her bodie, and nourished him so carefully; and withall offered himselfe to be the man that should stand to harken and beare witnesse of hamblets speeches with his mother, that hee might not be esteemed a counsellor in such a case wherein he refused to be the executioner for the behooſe and service of his prince. this invention pleased the king exceeding well, esteeming it as the onelie and soveraigne remedie to heale the prince of his lunacie; and to that ende making a long voyage, issued out of his pallace, and road to hunt in the forrest. meane time the counsellor entred secretly into the queenes chamber, and there hid himselfe behind the arras, not long before the queene and hamblet came thither, who beeng craftie and pollitique, as soone as hee was within the chamber, doubting some treason, and fearing if he should speake severely and wisely to his mother touching his secret practises he should be understood, and by that meanes inter- cepted, used his ordinary manner of dissimulation, and began to come like a cocke beating with his armes, (in such man- ner as cockes use to strike with their wings) upon the hang- ings of the chamber: whereby, feeling something stirring under them, he cried, a rat, a rat! and presently drawing his sworde thrust it into the hangings, which done, pulled the counsellour (halfe dead) out by the heeles, made an end of killing him, and beeing slaine, cut his bodie in pieces, which he caused to be boyled, and then cast it into an open vaulte or privie, that so it mighte serve for foode to the hogges. by which meanes having discovered the ambushe, and given the inventer thereof his just rewarde, hee came againe to his mother, who in the meane time wepte and tormented her selfe to see all her hopes frustrate, for that what fault soever she had committed, yet was shee sore grieved to see her onely child made a meere mockery, every man reproaching her with his folly, one point whereof she had as then seene before her eyes, which was no small pricke to her conscience, esteeming that the gods sent her that punishment for joyning incestu- prince oe denmarke. ously in marriage with the tyrrannous murtherer of her hus- band, who like wise ceased not to invent all the means he could to bring his nephew to his ende, accusing his owne queene naturall indiscretion, as beeing the ordinary guide of those º: “. that so much desire the pleasures of the bodie, who shutting up the waie to all reason, respect not what maie ensue of of their lightnes and great inconstancy, and how a pleasure of small moment is sufficient to give them cause of repent- ance during their lives, and make them curse the daye and time that ever any such apprehensions entred into theire mindes, or that they closed their eies to reject the honestie requisite in ladies of her qualitie, and to despise the holy institution of those dames that had gone before her, both in nobilitie and vertue, calling to mind the great prayses and commendations given by the danes to rinde, daughter to king rothere, the chastest lady in her time, and withall so rinde a - - princes of an shameſast that she would never consent to marriage with any ...his prince or knight whatsoever; surpassing in vertue all the chastitie. ladyes of her time, as shee herselfe surmounted them in beawtie, good behaviour, and comelines. and while in this sort she sate tormenting herselfe, hamlet entred into the chamber, who having once againe searched every corner of the same, distrusting his mother as well as the rest, and perceiving him- selfe to bee alone, began in sober and discreet manner to speak unto her, saying, what treason is this, o most infamous woman! of all that ever prostrated themselves to the will of an abhominable whore monger, who, under the vail of a dissembling creature, covereth the most wicked and detestable crime that man could ever imagine, or was committed. now may i be assured to trust you, that like a vile wanton adultresse, altogether im- pudent and given over to her pleasure, runnes spreading forth her armes joyfully to imbrace the trayterous villanous tyrant that murthered my father, and most incestuously receivest the villain into the lawfull bed of your loyall spouse, imprudently entertaining him in steede of the deare father of your miser- prince of denmarke. whelpes; and birds that have beakes, claws, and wings, re- sist such as would ravish them of their yong ones; but you, to the contrary, expose and deliver mee to death, whereas ye should defend me. is not this as much as if you should be- tray me, when you knowing the perversenes of the tyrant and his intents, ful of deadly counsell as touching the race and image of his brother, have not once sought, nor desired to finde the meanes to save your child (and only son) by sending him into swethland, norway, or england, rather than to leave him as a pray to youre infamous adulterer? bee not offended, i praye you, madame, if transported with dolour and griefe, i speake so boldely unto you, and that i respect you lesse then duetie requireth: for you, having forgotten mee, and wholy rejected the memorye of the deceased k. my father, must not bee abashed if i also surpasse the bounds and limits of due consideration. beholde into what distresse i am now fallen, and to what mischiefe my fortune, and your over great light- nesse, and want of wisdome have induced mee, that i am con- strained to playe the madde man to save my life, in steed of using and practising armes, following adventures, and seeking all meanes to make my selfe knowne to bee the true and un- doubted heire of the valiant and vertuous king horvendile. it was not without cause, and juste occasion, that my ges- tures, countenances, and words, seeme all to proceed from a madman, and that i desire to have all men esteeme mee wholly deprived of sence and reasonable understanding, by- cause i am well assured, that he that hath made no conscience to kill his owne brother, (accustomed to murthers, and allured with desire of governement without controll in his treasons), will not spare, to save himselfe with the like crueltie, in the blood and flesh of the loyns of his brother by him massacred: and, therefore, it is better for me to ſayne madnesse, then to use my right sences as nature hath bestowed them upon me; the bright shining clearnes therof i am forced to hide under this shadow of dissimulation, as the sun doth hir beams under some great cloud, when the wether in sommer time overcast- eth. the face of a mad man serveth to cover my gallant the hystorie of hamblet, countenance, and the gestures of a fool are fit for me, to the end that guiding my self wisely therein, i may preserve my life for the danes, and the memory of my late deceased fa- ther; for the desire of revenging his death is so engraven in my heart, that if i dye not shortly, i hope to take such and so great vengeance, that these countryes shall for ever speake thereof. neverthelesse, i must stay the time, meanes, and oc- casion, lest by making over great hast, i be now the cause of we must mine owne sodaine ruine and overthrow, and by that meanes ..",". end before ibeginne to effect my hearts desire. hee that hath to person. doe with a wicked, disloyall, cruell, and discourteous man must use craft and politike inventions, such as a fine witte can best imagine, not to discover his interprise; for seeing that by force i cannot effect my desire, reason alloweth me by dissimulation, subtiltie, and secret practises to proceed therein. to conclude, weepe not (madame) to see my folly, but rather sigh and lament your owne offence, tormenting your conscience in regard of the infamie that hath so defiled the ancient re- ...ſº nowne and glorie that (in times past) honoured queene geruth; º", "... for wee are not to sorrowe and grieve at other mens vices, but "" for our owne misdeedes, and great folloyes. desiring you, for the surplus of my proceedings, above all things (as you love your owne life and welfare) that neither the king nor any other may by any meanes know mine intent; and let me alone with the rest, for i hope in the ende to bring my purpose to effect. although the queene perceived herselfe neerly touched, and that hamlet mooved her to the quicke, where she felt herselfe interested, neverthelesse shee forgot all dis- daine and wrath, which thereby she might as then have had, hearing her selfe so sharply chiden and reprooved, for the joy she then conceaved, to behold the gallant spirit of her sonne, and to thinke what she might hope, and the easier expect of his so great policie and wisdome. but on the one side she durst not lift up her eyes to beholde him, remembering her of fence, and on the other side she would gladly have imbraced her son, in regard of the wise admonitions by him given unto her, which as then quenched the flames of unbridled desire prince of denmarke. that before had moved her to affect k. fengon, to ingraff in her heart the vertuous actions of her lawfull spouse, whom in- wardly she much lamented, when she beheld the lively image and portraiture of his vertue and great wisedome in her childe, representing his fathers haughtie and valiant heart: and so, overcome and vanquished with this honest passion, and weep- ing most bitterly, having long time fixed her eyes upon ham- let, as beengravished into some great and deepe contempla- tion, and as it were wholy amazed, at the last imbracing him in her armes (with the like love that a vertuous mother may or can use to kisse and entertaine her owne childe), shee spake unto him in this manner. i know well (my sonne) that i have done thee great wrong in marrying with fengon, the cruell tyrant and murtherer of thy father, and my loyall spouse: but when thou shalt consider the small meanes of resistance, and the treason of the palace, with the little cause of confidence we are to expect or hope for of the courtiers, all wrought to his will, as also the power hee made ready, if i should have refused to like of him, thou wouldest rather excuse then accuse me of lascivious- nes or inconstancy, much lesse offer me that wrong to sus- pect that ever thy mother geruthe once consented to the death and murther of her husband: swearing unto thee (by the majestie of the gods) that if it had layne in my power to have resisted the tyrant, although it had beene with the losse of my blood, yea and my life, i would surely have saved the life of my lord and husband, with as good a will and desire as, since that time, i have often beene a meanes to hinder and impeach the shortning of thy life, which being taken away, i will no lomger live here upon earth. for seeing that thy sences are whole and sound, i am in hope to see an easie meanes invented for the revenging of thy fathers death. neverthelesse, mine owne sweet soone, if thou hast pittie of thy selfe, or care of the memorie of thy father (although thou wilt do nothing for her that deserveth not the name of a mother in this respect), i pray thee, carie thine affayres wisely: m the hystorie of hamblet, bee not hastie, nor over furious in thy interprises, neither yet advance thy selfe more then reason shall moove thee to effect thy purpose. thou seest there is not almost any man wherein thou mayest put thy trust, nor any woman to whom i dare utter the least part of my secrets, that would not pre- sently report it to thine adversarie, who, although in out- ward shew he dissembleth to love thee, the better to injoy his pleasures of me, yet hee distrusteth and feareth mee for thy sake, and is not so simple to be easily perswaded that thou art a foole or mad; so that if thou chance to doe any thing that seemeth to proceed of wisedome or policie (how secretly soever it be done) he will presently be informed thereof, and i am greatly afraide that the devils have shewed him what hath past at this present between us, (fortune so much pursueth and contrarieth our ease and welfare) or that this murther that now thou hast committed be not the cause of both our destructions, which i by no meanes will seeme to know, but will keepe secret both thy wisedome and hardy interprise; beseeching the gods (my good soone) that they, guiding thy heart, directing thy counsels, and prospering thy interprise, i may see thee possesse and injoy that which is thy right, and weare the crowne of denmarke, by the tyrant taken from thee; that i may rejoyce in thy prospe- ritie, and therewith content my self, seeing with what courage and boldnesse thou shalt take vengeance upon the murtherer of thy father, as also upon all those that have as- sisted and favoured him in his murtherous and bloody enter- prise. madame (sayd hamlet) i will put my trust in you, and from henceforth meane not to meddle further with your affayres, beseeching you (as you love your owne flesh and blood) that you will from hence foorth no more esteeme of the adulterer, mine enemie whom i wil surely kill, or cause to be put to death, in despite of all the devils in hel ; and have he never so manie flattering courtezans to defend him, yet will i bring him to his death, and they themselves also shall beare him company therein, as they have bin his perverse prince of denmarke. counsellors in the action of killing my father, and his com- panions in his treason, massacre and cruell enterprise. and reason requireth that, even as trayterously they then caused their prince to bee put to death, that with the like (nay well, much more) justice they should pay the interest of their fellonious actions. you know (madame) how hother your grandfather, and home. father to the good king roderick, having vanquished guimon, ºi. turn caused him to be burnt, for that the cruell vilain had done º'o": the like to his lord gevare, whom he betrayed in the night we must observe nei- time. and who knoweth not that traytors and perjured ...:”." persons deserve no faith nor loyaltie to be observed towardes . . them, and that conditions made with murtherers ought to parricides. bee esteemed as cobwebs, and accounted as if they were things never promised nor agreed upon : but if i lay handes upon fengon, it will neither be fellonie nor treason, hee being neither my king nor my lord, but i shall justly punish him as my subject, that hath disloyaly behaved himselfe against his lord and soveraigne prince. and seeing that glory is the rewarde of the vertuous, and the honour and praise of those that do service to their naturall prince, why should not blame and dishonour accompany traytors, and ignominious death althose that dare be so bold as to lay violent hands upon sacred kings, that are friends and companions of the gods, as representing their majestie and persons. to con- clude, glorie is the crown of vertue, and the price of con- stancie; and seeing that it never accompanieth with infelicitie, but shunneth cowardize and spirits of base and trayterous conditions, it must necessarily followe, that either a glorious death will be mine ende, or with my sword in hand, (laden with tryumph and victorie) i shall bereave them of their lives that made mine unfortunate, and darkened the beames of that vertue which i possessed from the blood and famous memory of my predecessors. for why should men desire to live, when shame and infamie are the executioners that tor- ment their consciences, and villany is the cause that with- m the hystorie of hamblet, holdeth the heart from valiant interprises, and diverteth the minde from honest desire of glorie and commendation, which indureth for ever ! i know it is foolishly done to gather fruit before it is ripe, and to seeke to enjoy a benefit, not knowing whither it belong to us of right; but i hope to effect it so well, and have so great confidence in my fortune (that hitherto hath guided the action of my life) that i shall not dye without revenging my selfe upon mine enemie, and that himselfe shall be the instrument of his owne decay, and to execute that which of my selfe i durst not have enter- prised. after this, fengon (as if hee had beene out some long journey) came to the court againe, and asked for him that had received the charge to play the intilligencer, to entrap ham- let in his dissembled wisedome, was abashed to heare neither newes nor tydings of him, and for that cause asked hamlet what was become of him, naming the man. the prince that never used lying, and who in all the answers that ever he made (during his counterfeit madnesse) never strayed from the trueth (as a generous minde is a mortal enemie to untruth) answered and sayd, that the counsellor he sought for was gone downe through the privie, where being choaked by the filthynesse of the place, the hogs meeting him had filled their bellyes. prince of denmarke. chap. iiii. how fengon the third time devised to send hamblet to the king of england, with secret letters to have him put to death: and how hamblet, when his companions slept, read the letters, and instead of them counterfeited others, willing the king of england to put the two messengers to death, and to marry his daughter to hamblet, which was ef- fected; and how hamblet escaped out of england. a man would have judged any thing, rather then that hamblet had committed that murther, nevertheless fengon could not content himselfe, but still his minde gave him that the foole would play him some tricke of liegerdemaine, and willingly would have killed him, but he feared king rodericke, his grandfather, and further durst not offend the queene, mother to the foole, whom she loved and much cherished, shewing great griefe and heavinesse to see him so transported out of his wits. and in that conceit, seeking to bee rid of him, determined to finde the meanes to doe it by the ayde of a stranger, making the king of england minister of his massa- creing resolution, choosing rather that his friende should de- file his renowne with so great a wickednesse, then himselfe to fall into perpetuall infamie by an exploit of so great cruel- tie, to whom hee purposed to send him, and by letters desire him to put him to death. hamblet, understanding that he should be sent into england, presently doubted the occasion of his voyage, and for that cause speaking to the queene, desired her not to make any shew of sorrow or griefe for his departure, but rather counterfeit a glad- nesse, as being rid of his presence; whom, although she loved, yet she dayly grieved to see him in so pittifull estate, deprived of all sence and reason: desiring her further, that she should the hystorie of hamblet, hamblets craft to save his life. hang the hall with tapestrie, and make it fast with nayles upon the walles, and keepe the brands for him which hee had sharpened at the points, then, when as he said he made arrowes to revenge the death of his father: lastly, he coun- selled her, that the yeere after his departure being accom- plished, she should celebrate his funerals; assuring her that at the same instant she should see him returne with great contentment and pleasure unto her for that his voyage. now, to beare him company were assigned two of fengons faithfull ministers, bearing letters ingraved in wood, that contained hamlets death, in such sort as he had advertised the king of england. but the subtile danish prince (beeing at sea) whilst his companions slept, having read the letters, and knowne his uncles great treason, with the wicked and villain- ous mindes of the two courtyers that led him to the slaughter, raced out the letters that concerned his death, and in stead thereof graved others, with commission to the king of england to hang his two companions; and not content to turne the death they had devised against him upon their owne neckes, wrote further, that king fengon willed him to give his daughter to hamlet in marriage. and so arriving in england, the messengers presented themselves to the king, giving him fengons letters; who having read the contents, sayd nothing as then, but stayed convenient time to effect fengons desire, meane time using the danes familiarly, doing them that honour to sit at his table (for that kings as then were not so curiously, nor solemnely served as in these our dayes) for in these dayes meane kings, and lords of small revenewe are as difficult and hard to bee seene, as in times past the monarches of persia used to bee: or as it is reported of the great king of aethy- opia, who will not permit any man to see his face, which or- dinarily hee covereth with a vaile. and as the messengers sate at the table with the king, subtile hamlet was so far from being merry with them, that he would not taste one bit of meate, bread, nor cup of beare whatsoever, as then set upon the table, not without great wondering of the company, abash- prince of denmarke. ed to see a yong man and a stranger not to esteeme of the delicate meates and pleasant drinkes served at the banquet, rejecting them as things filthy, evill of tast, and worse pre- pared. the king, who for that time dissembled what he thought, caused his ghests to be conveyed into their chamber, willing one of his secret servantes to hide himselfe therein, and so to certifie him what speeches past among the danes at their going to bed. now they were no sooner entred into the chamber, and those that were appointed to attend upon them gone out, but hamlets companions asked him, why he refused to eate and drinke of that which hee found upon the table, not honouring the banquet of so great a king, that entertained them in friendly sort, with such honour and courtesie as it deserved? saying further, that hee did not well, but dishonoured him that sent him, as if he sent men into england that feared to bee poysoned by so great a king. the prince, that had done nothing without reason and prudent consideration, answered them, and sayd : what, think you, that i wil eat bread dipt in humane blood, and defile my throate with the rust of yron, and use that meat that stinketh and savoureth of mans flesh, already putrified and corrupted, and that senteth like the sa- vour of a dead carryon, long since cast into a valt! and how woulde you have mee to respect the king, that hath the coun- tenance of a slave; and the queene, who in stead of great majestie, hath done three things more like a woman of base parentage, and fitter for a waiting gentlewoman then beseem- ing a lady of her qualitie and estate. and having sayd so, used many injurious and sharpe speeches as well against the king and queene, as others that had assisted at that banquet for the intertainment of the danish ambassadors; and therein hamblet said trueth, as hereafter you shall heare, for that in those dayes, the north parts of the worlde, living as then under sathans lawes, were full of inchanters, so that there was not any yong gentleman whatsoever that knew not something therein sufficient to serve his turne, if need required: as yet the hystorie of hamblet, in those dayes in gothland and biarmy, there are many that knew not what the christian religion permitteth, as by read- ing the histories of norway and gothland, you maie easilie perceive: and so hamlet, while his father lived, had bin in- structed in that devilish art, whereby the wicked spirite abuseth mankind, and advertiseth him (as he can) of things past. it toucheth not the matter herein to discover the parts of devination in man, and whether this prince, by reason of his over greatmelancholy, had received those impressions, de- vining that, which never any but himselfe had before de- clared, like the philosophers, who discoursing of divers deep points of philosophie, attribute the force of those divinations to such as are saturnists by complection, who oftentimes speake of things which, their fury ceasing, they then alreadye can hardly understand who are the pronouncers; and for that cause plato saith, many deviners and many poets, after the force and vigour of their fier beginneth to lessen, do hardly understand what they have written, although intreating of such things, while the spirite of devination continueth upon them, they doe in such sorte discourse thereof that the authors and inventers of the arts themselves by them alledged, commend their discourses and subtill disputations. likewise i mean not to relate that which divers men beleeve, that a reasonable soul becometh the habitation of a meaner sort of devels, by whom men learn the secrets of things natural; and much lesse do i account of the supposed governors of the world fained by magitians, by whose means they brag to effect mer- vailous things. it would seeme miraculous that hamlet shold divine in that sort, which after prooved so true (if as i said before) the devel had not knowledg of things past, but to grant it he knoweth things to come i hope you shall never finde me in so grose an error. you will compare and make equall derivation, and conjecture with those that are made by the spirit of god, and pronounced by the holy prophets, that tasted of that marvelous science, to whome onely was de- prince of denmarke. clared the secrets and wondrous workes of the almighty. yet there are some imposturious companions that impute so much devinitie to the devell, the father of lyes, that they at- tribute unto him the truth of the knowledge of thinges that shall happen unto men, alledging the conference of saul with the witch, although one example out of the holy scriptures, specially set downe for the condemnation of wicked man, is not of force to give a sufficient law to all the world; for they themselves confesse that they can devine, not according to the universal cause of things, but by signes borrowed from such like causes, which are all waies alike, and by those con- jectures they can give judgement of thinges to come, but all this beeing grounded upon a weake support, (which is a simple conjecture) and having so slender a foundation, as some foolish or late experience the fictions being voluntarie, it should be a great folly in a man of good judgment, specially one that imbraceth the preaching of the gospell, and seeketh after no other but the trueth thereof, to repose upon any of these likelihoods or writings full of deceipt. as touching magical operations, i will grant them somewhat therein, finding divers histories that write thereof, and that the bible maketh mention, and forbiddeth the use thereof: yea, the lawes of the gentiles and ordinances of emperors have bin made against it in such sort, that mahomet, the great hereticke and friend of the devell, by whose subtiltyes hee abused most part of the east countries, hath ordained great punishments for such as use and practise those unlawfull and damnable arts, which, for this time leaving of, let us returne to hamblet, brought up in these abuses, according to the man- ner of his country, whose companions hearing his answere reproached him of folly, saying that hee could by no meanes show a greater point of indiscretion, then in despising that which is lawfull, and rejecting that which all men receaved as a necessary thing, and that hee had not grossely so for- gotten himselfe as in that sort to accuse such and so excellent a man as the king of england, and to slander the queene, the hystorie of hamblet, being then as famous and wise a princes as any at that day raigning in theilands thereabouts, to cause him to be punished according to his deserts; but he, continuing in his dissimula- tion, mocked him, saying that hee had not done any thing that was not good and most true. on the other side, the king being advertised thereof by him that stood to heare the dis- course, judged presently that hamlet, speaking so ambigu- ously, was either a perfect foole, or else one of the wisest princes in his time, answering so sodainly, and so much to the purpose upon the demaund by his companions made touching his behaviour; and the better to find the trueth, caused the babler to be sent for, of whome inquiring in what place the corne grew whereof he made bread for his table, and whether in that ground there were not some signes or newes of a battaile fought, whereby humaine blood had therein been shed? the babler answered that not far from thence there lay a field ful of dead mens bones, in times past slaine in a battaile, as by the greate heapes of wounded sculles mighte well appeare, and for that the ground in that parte was become fertiler then other grounds, by reason of the fatte and humours of the dead bodies, that every yeer the farmers used there to have in the best wheat they could finde to serve his majesties house. the king perceiving it to be true, according to the yong princes wordes, asked where the hogs had bin fed that were killed to be served at his table? and answere was made him, that those hogs getting out of the said fielde wherein they were kepte, had found the bodie of a thiefe that had beene hanged for his demerits, and had eaten thereof: whereat the king of england beeing abashed, would needs know with what water the beer he used to drinke of had beene brued! which having knowne, he caused the river to bee digged somewhat deeper, and therin found great store of swords and rustie armours, that gave an ill savour to the drinke. it were good i should heere dilate somewhat of merlins prophesies, which are said to be spoken of him before he was fully one yeere old; but if you consider prince of denmarke. wel what hath al reddy been spoken, it is no hard matter to divine of things past, although the minister of sathan therein played his part, giving sodaine and prompt answeres to this yong prince, for that herein are nothing but natural things, such as were wel known to be true, and therefore not needfull to dreame of thinges to come. this knowne, the king, greatly moved with a certaine curiositie to knowe why the danish prince saide that he had the countenance of a slave, suspect- ing thereby that he reproached the basenes of his blood, and that he wold affirme that never any prince had bin his sire, wherin to satisfie himselfe he went to his mother, and lead- ing her into a secret chamber, which he shut as soone as they were entred, desired her of her honour to shewe him of whome he was ingendred in this world. the good lady, wel assured that never any man had bin acquainted with her love touch- ing any other man then her husband, sware that the king her husband onely was the man that had enjoyed the pleasures of her body; but the king her sonne, alreadie with the truth of the danish princes answers, threatned his mother to make her tell by force, if otherwise she would not confesse it, who for feare of death acknowledged that she had prostrated her body to a slave, and made him father to the king of england; whereat the king was abashed, and wholy ashamed. i give them leave to judge who esteeming themselves honester than theire neighbours, and supposing that there can be nothing amisse in their houses, make more enquirie then is requisite to know the which they would rather not have known. neverthelesse dissembling what he thought, and biting upon the bridle, rather then he would deprive himselfe by publishing the lasciviousnes of his mother, thought better to leave a great sin unpunished, then thereby to make himselfe con- temptible to his subjects, who peradventure would have re- jected him, as not desiring to have a bastard to raigne over so great a kingdome. but as he was sorry to hear his mothers confession, on the otherside he tooke great pleasure in the subtilty and quick the hystorie of hamblet, spirit of the yong prince, and for that causerwent unto him to aske him, why he had reproved three things in his queene convenient for a slave, and savouring more of basenes then of royaltie, and far unfit for the majesty of a great prince the king, not content to have receaved a great displeasure by knowing him selfe to be a bastard, and to have heard with what injuries he charged her whom hee loved best in all the world, would not content himself untill he also under- stood that which displeased him, as much as his owne proper disgrace, which was that his queen was the daughter of a chambermaid, and with all noted certaine foolish counte- nances she made, which not onely shewed of what parentage she came, but also that hir humors savored of the basenes and low degree of hir parents, whose mother, he assured the king, was as then yet holden in servitude. the king admiring the young prince, and behoulding in him some matter of greater respect then in the common sort of men, gave him his daughter in marriage, according to the counterfet letters by him de- vised, and the next day caused the two servants of fengon to be executed, to satisfie, as he thought, the king's desire. but hamlet, although the sport plesed him wel, and that the king of england could not have done him a greater favour, made as though he had been much offended, threatning the king to be revenged, but the king, to appease him, gave him a great sum of gold, which hamlet caused to be molten, and put into two staves, made hollow for the same purpose, to serve his tourne there with as neede should require; for of all other the kings treasures he took nothing with him into denmark but onely those two staves, and as soone as the yeere began to bee at an end, having somewhat before ob- tained licence of the king his father in law to depart, went for denmarke; then, with all the speed hee could to returne againe into england to marry his daughter, and so set sayle for denmarke. prince of denmarke. chap. v. how hamblet, having escaped out of england, ar- rived in denmarke the same day that the danes were celebrating his funerals, supposing him to be dead in england; and how he revenged his fathers death upon his uncle and the rest of the courtiers; and what followed. hamblet in that sort sayling into denmark, being arrived in the contry, entered into the pallace of his uncle the same day that they were celebrating his funeralls, and going into the hall, procured no small astonishment and wonder to them all, no man thinking other but that hee had beene deade: among the which many of them rejoyced not a little for the pleasure which they knew fengon would conceave for so pleasant a losse, and some were sadde, as remembering the honourable king horvendile, whose victories they could by no meanes forget, much lesse deface out of theire memories that which apperteined unto him, who as then greatly rejoyced to see a false report spread of hamlets death, and that the tyrant had not as yet obtained his will of the heire of jutie, but rather hoped god would restore him to his sences againe for the good and welfare of that province. their amazement at the last beeing tourned into laughter, all that as then were assistant at the funerall banquet of him whome they esteemed dead, mocked each at other, for having beene so simply deceived, and wondering at the prince, that in his so long a voyage he had not recovered any of his sences, asked what was become of them that had borne him company into greate brittain? to whome he made answere (shewing them the two hollow staves, wherein he had put his molten golde, that the king of eng- land had given him to appease his fury, concerning the mur- the hystorie of hamblet, ther of his two companions), and said, here they are both. whereat many that already knew his humours, presently conjectured that hee had plaide some tricke of legerdemane, ( and to deliver himselfe out of danger, had throwne them into the pitte prepared for him; so that fearing to follow after them and light upon some evil adventure, they went presently out of the court. and it was well for them that they didde so, con- sidering the tragedy acted by him the same daie, beeing ac- counted his funerall, but in trueth theire last daies, that as then rejoyced for their overthrow; for when every man busied himselfe to make good cheare, and hamlets arivall provoked them more to drinke and carouse, the prince himselfe at that time played the butler and a gentleman attending on the ta- bles, not suffering the pots nor goblets to bee empty, whereby hee gave the noble men such store of liquor, that all of them , rºº. being ful laden with wine and gorged with meate, were con- common in - - the north, strained to lay themselves downe in the same place where tº of the they had supt, so much their sences were dulled, and over- come with the fire of over great drinking (a vice common and familiar among the almaines, and other nations inhabiting the north parts of the world) which when hamlet perceiving, and finding so good opportunitie to effect his purpose and bee revenged of his enemies, and by the means to abandon the actions, gestures, and apparel of a mad man, occasion so fitly finding his turn, and as it were effecting it selfe, failed not to take hold therof, and seeing those drunken bodies, filled with wine, lying like hogs upon the ground, some sleeping, others vomiting the over great abundance of wine which without measure they had swallowed up, made the hangings about the hall to fall downe and cover them all over; which he nailed to the ground, being boorded, and at the ends thereof he stuck the brands, whereof i spake before, by him sharpned, which served for prickes, binding and tying the hangings in such sort, that what force soever they used to loose them- selves, it was unpossible to get from under them : and pre- sently he set fire in the foure corners of the hal, in such sort, prince of denmarke. that all that were as then therein not one escaped away, but were forced to purge their sins by fire, and dry up the great aboundance of liquor by them received into their bodies, all of them dying in the inevitable and mercilesse flames of the whot and burning fire: which the prince perceiving, became wise, and knowing that his uncle, before the end of the ban- quet, had withdrawn himselfe into his chamber, which stood apart from the place where the fire burnt, went thither, and a strange re- venge taken entring into the chamber, layd hand upon the sword of his by hamlet. fathers murtherer, leaving his own in the place, which while he was at the banket some of the courtiers had nailed fast into the scaberd, and going to fengon said: i wonder, disloyal king, how thou canst sleep heer at thine ease, and al thy pallace is burnt, the fire thereof having burnt the greatest part of thy courtiers and ministers of thy cruelty, and detestable tirannies; and which is more, i cannot imagin how thousholdst wel assure thy'self and thy estate, as now to take thy ease, seeing hamlet so neer thee armed with the shafts by him prepared long since, and at this present is redy to revenge the traiterous injury by thee done to his lord and father. fengon, as then knowing the truth of his nephews subtile practise, and hering him speak with stayed mind, and which is more, perceived a sword naked in his hand, which he already lifted up to deprive him of his life, leaped quickly out of the bed, taking holde of hamlets sworde, that was nayled into the scaberd, which as hee sought to pull out. hamlet gave him such a blowe upon the chine of the necke, that hee cut his head cleane from his shoulders, and as he fell to the ground sayd, this just and violent death is a just reward for such as thou art: now go thy wayes, and when thou commest in hell, see thou forget not to tell thy brother (whom thou trayterously slewest), that it was his sonne that sent thee thither with the message, to the ende that beeing comforted thereby, his soule may rest among the blessed spirits, and quit mee of the ob- ligation that bound me to pursue his vengeance upon mine owne blood, that seeing it was by thee that i lost the chiefe thing that tyed me to this aliance and consanguinitie. a a mockebut yet sharp and stinging, given hamlet to his uncle. the hystorie of hamblet, man (to say the trueth) hardie, couragious, and worthy of eternall comendation, who arming himself with a crafty, dis- sembling, and strange shew of beeng distract out of his wits, under that pretence deceived the wise, pollitike, and craftie, thereby not onely preserving his life from the treasons and wicked practises of the tyrant, but (which is more) by an new commenda and unexpected kinde of punishment, revenged his fathers, '''", death, many yeeres after the act committed: in no such sort ** that directing his courses with such prudence, and effecting his purposes with so great boldnes and constancie, he left a judgement to be decyded among men of wisdom, which was more commendable in him, his constancy or magnanimitie, or his wisdom in ordring his affaires, according to the preme- ditable determination he had conceaved. now just if vengeance ever seemed to have any shew of justice, it is . be then, when pietie and affection constraineth us to remember our fathers unjustly murdered, as the things wherby we are dispensed withal, and which seeke the means not to leave treason and murther unpunished: seeing david a holy and just king, and of nature simple, courteous, and debonaire, yet tº "... when he dyed he charged his soone salomon (that succeeded "tº him in his throane) not to suffer certaine men that had done venge him of , . - - - - - - * his him injurie to escape unpunished. not that this holy king (as then ready to dye, and to give account before god of all his actions) was carefull or desirous of revenge, but to leave this example unto us, that where the prince or countrey is in- teressed, the desire of revenge cannot by any meanes (how small soever) beare the title of condemnation, but is rather commendable and worthy of praise: for otherwise the good kings of juda, nor others had not pursued them to death, that had offended their predecessors, if god himself had not inspired and ingraven that desire within their hearts. hereof the athenian lawes beare witnesse, whose custome was to erect images in remembrance of those men that, revenging the injuries of the commonwealth, boldly massacred tyrants and such as troubled the peace and welfare of the citizens. hamblet, having in this manner revenged himselfe, durst prince of denmarke. not presently declare his action to the people, but to the con- trary determined to worke by policie, so to give them intel- ligence, what he had done, and the reason that drewe him thereunto: so that beeing accompanied with such of his fathers friends that then were rising, he stayed to see what the peo- ple would doe when they shoulde heare of that sodaine and fearefull action. the next morning the townes bordering there aboutes, desiring to know from whence the flames of fire proceeded the night before they had seene, came thither, and perceiving the kings pallace burnt to ashes, and many bodyes (most part consumed) lying among the ruines of the house, all of them were much abashed, nothing being left of the palace but the foundation. but they were much more amased to beholde the body of the king all bloody, and his head cut off lying hard by him; whereat some began to threaten revenge, yet not knowing against whom ; others be- holding so lamentable a spectacle, armed themselves, the rest rejoycing, yet not daring to make any shewe thereof; some detesting the crueltie, others lamenting the death of their prince, but the greatest part calling horvendiles murther to remembrance, acknowledging a just judgement from above, that had throwne downe the pride of the tyrant. and in this sort, the diversities of opinions among that multitude of people being many, yet every man ignorant what would be the issue of that tragedie, none stirred from thence, neither yet attempt- ed to move any tumult, every man fearing his owne skinne, and distrusting his neighbour, esteeming each other to bee consenting to the massacre. n prince of denmarke. king, but of an execrable tyrant, and a parricide most detesta- ble. oh danes! the spectacle was much more hydeous when horvendile your king was murthered by his brother. what should i say a brother nay, rather by the most abhominable executioner that ever beheld the same. it was you that saw horvendiles members massacred, and that with teares and lamentations accompanied him to the grave ; his body disfi- gured, hurt in a thousand places, and misused in ten times as many fashions. and who doubteth (seeing experience hath taught you) that the tyrant (in massacring your lawfull king) sought onely to infringe the ancient liberties of the common people ! and it was one hand onely, that murthering horven- dile, cruelly dispoyled him of life, and by the same meanes unjustly bereaved you of your ancient liberties, and delighted more in oppression then to embrace the plesant countenance of prosperous libertie without adventuring for the same. and what mad man is he that delighteth more in the tyrany of fengon then in the clemencie and renewed courtesie of horvendile? if it bee so, that by clemencie and affabilitie the hardest and stoutest hearts are molified and made tractable, and that evill and hard usage causeth subjects to be outragi- ous and unruly, why behold you not the debonair cariage of the first, to compare it with the cruelties and insolencies of the second, in every respect as cruell and barbarous as his bro- ther was gentle, meeke, and courteous! remember, o you danes, remember what love and amitie horvendile shewed unto you; with what equitie and justice he swayed the great affaires of this kingdome, and with what humanitie and cour- tisie he defended and cherished you, and then i am assured that the simplest man among you will both remember and acknowledge that he had a most peaceable, just, and righteous king taken from him, to place in his throane a tyrant and murtherer of his brother: one that hath perverted all right, abolished the auncient lawes of our fathers, contaminated the memories of our ancestors, and by his wickednesse polluted the integritie of this kingdome, upon the necke thereof having n the hystorie of hamblft, placed the troublesome yoak of heavie servitude, abolishing that libertie wherein horvendile used to maintaine you, and suffered you to live at your ease. and should you now bee sorrie to see the ende of your mischiefes, and that this miser- able wretch, pressed downe with the burthen of his offences, at this present payeth the usury of the particide committed upon the body of his brother, and would not himselfe be the revenger of the outrage done to me, whom he sought to de- prive of mine inheritance, taking from denmark a lawfull successor, to plant a wicked stranger, and bring into capti- vitie those that my father had infranchised and delivered out of misery and bondage? and what man is he, that having any sparke of wisdom, would esteem a good deed to be an injury, and account pleasures equal with wrongs and evident outrages it were then great folly and temerity in princes and valiant commanders in the wars to expose themselves to perils and hazards of their lives for the welfare of the com- mon people, if that for a recompence they should reape hatred and indignation of the multitude. to what end should hother have punished balder, if, in steed of recompence, the danes and swethlanders had banished him to receive and accept the successors of him that desired nought but his ruine and overthrowe ? what is hee that hath so small feeling of reason and equitie, that would be grieved to see treason rewarded with the like, and that an evill act is punished with just de- merit in the partie himselfe that was the occasion who was ever sorowfull to behold the murtherer of innocents brought to his end, or what man weepeth to see a just massacre done upon a tyrant, usurper, villaine, and bloody personage? i perceive you are attentive, and abashed for not knowing the author of your deliverance, and sorry that you cannot tell to whom you should bee thankefull for such and so great a benefit as the destruction of a tyrant, and the overthrow of the place that was the storehouse of his villanies, and the true receptacle of all the theeves and traytors in this kingdome: but beholde (here in your presence) him that brought so good prince of denmarke. an enterprise to effect. it is i (my good friends), it is i, that confesse i have taken vengeance for the violence done unto my lord and father, and for the subjection and servitude that i perceived in this countrey, whereof i am the just and law- full successor. it is i alone, that have done this piece of worke, whereunto you ought to have lent me your handes, and therein have ayded and assisted me. i have only ac- complished that which all of you might justly have effected, by good reason, without falling into any point of treason or fellonie. it is true that i hope so much of your good willes towards the deceased king horvendile, and that the remem- brances of his vertues is yet so fresh within your memories, that if i had required your aide herein, you would not have denied it, specially to your naturall prince. but it liked mee best to doe it my selfe alone, thinking it a good thing to punish the wicked without hazarding the lives of my friends and loyall subjects, not desiring to burthen other mens shoul- ders with this weight; for that i made account to effect it well inough without exposing any man into danger, and by publishing the same should cleane have overthrowne the de- vice, which at this present i have so happily brought to passe. i have burnt the bodyes of the courtiers to ashes, being companions in the mischiefs and treasons of the tyrant; but i have left fengon whole, that you might punish his dead carkasse (seeing that when hee lived you durst not lay hands upon him), to accomplish the full punishment and vengeance due unto him, and so satisfie your choller upon the bones of him that filled his greedy hands and coffers with your riches, and shed the blood of your brethren and friends. bee joy- full, then (my good friends); make ready the nosegay for this usurping king: burne his abhominable body, boyle his lascivious members, and cast the ashes of him that hath beene hurtfull to all the world into the ayre : drive from you the sparkes of pitie, to the end that neither silver, nor christall cup, nor sacred tombe may be the restfull habitation of the reliques and bones of so detestable a man: let not one trace the hystorie of hamblet, of a parricide be seene, nor your countrey defiled with the presence of the least member of this tyrant without pity, that your neighbors may not smell the contagion, nor our land the polluted infection of a body condemned for his wickednes. i have done my part to present him to you in this sort; now it belongs to you to make an end of the worke, and put to the last hand of dutie whereunto your severall functions call you; for in this sort you must honor abhominable princes, and such ought to be the funerall of a tyrant, parricide, and usurper, both of the bed and patrimony that no way belonged unto him, who having bereaved his countrey of liberty, it is fit that the land refuse to give him a place for the eternal rest of his bones. o my good friends, seeing you know the wrong that hath bin done unto mee, what my griefs are, and in what misery i have lived since the death of the king, my lord and father, and seeing that you have both known and tasted these things then, when as i could not conceive the outrage that i felt, what neede i recite it unto you? what benefit would it be to discover it before them that knowing it would burst (as it were with despight) to heare of my hard chance, and curse fortune for so much imbasing a royall prince, as to deprive him of his majesty, although not any of you durst so much as shew one sight of sorrow or sadnes? you know how my father in law conspired my death, and sought by divers meanes to take away my life; how i was forsaken of the queen my mother, mocked of my friends, and dispised of mine own subjects: hetherto i have lived laden with griefe, and wholy confounded in teares, my life still accompanied with fear and suspition, expecting the houre when the sharp sword would make an ende of my life and miserable an- guishes. how many times, counterfeiting the mad man, have i heard you pitty my distresse, and secretly lament to see me disinherited and yet no man sought to revenge the death of my father, nor to punish the treason of my incestuous uncle, full of murthers and massacres. this charitie ministred prince of denmarke. comfort, and your affectionate complaints made me evidently see your good wills, that you had in memorie the calamity of your prince, and within your harts ingraven the desire of vengeance for the death of him that deserved a long life. and what heart can bee so hard and untractable, or spirit so se- vere, cruel, and rigorous, that would not relent at the remem- brance of my extremities, and take pitty of an orphan child, so abandoned of the world? what eyes were so voyd of moysture but would distill a field of tears, to see a poore prince assaulted by his owne subjects, betrayed by his mother, pursued by his uncle, and so much oppressed that his friends durst not shew the effects of their charitie and good affection o(my good friends) shew pity to him whom you have nourished, and let your harts take some compassion upon the memory of my misfortunes! i speak to you that are innocent of al treason, and never defiled your hands, spirits, nor desires with the blud of the greate and vertuous king horvendile. take pity upon the queen, sometime your sove- raign lady, and my right honorable mother, forced by the tyrant, and rejoyce to see the end and extinguishing of the object of her dishonor, which constrained her to be lesse pitiful to her own blood, so far as to imbrace the murtherer of her own dear spouse, charging her selfe with a double burthen of infamy and incest, together wtth injuring and dis- annulling of her house, and the ruine of her race. this hath bin the occasion that made me counterfet folly, and cover my intents under availe of meer madnes, which hath wisdom and pollicy therby to inclose the fruit of this vengeance, which, that it hath attained to the ful point of efficacy and perfect ac- complishment, you yourselves shall bee judges; for touching this and other things concerning my profit, and the managing of great affairs, i refer my self to your counsels, and ther- unto am fully determined to yeeld, as being those that tram- ple under your feet the murtherers of my father, and despise the ashes of him that hath polluted and violated the spouse of his brother, by him massacred; that hath committed felony the hystorie of hamblet, leaste do his endeavour. this promise incited the barbarous king to massacre hamlet, but the alliance presenting it selfe before his eies, and beholding the one deade, although his friend, and the other alive, and husband to his daughter, made him deface his desire of revenge. but in the end, the conscience of his oath and promise obtained the upper hand, and secretly made him conclude the death of his sonne in law, which enterprise after that was cause of his own death, and overrunning of the whole country of england by the cruelty and despight conceived by the king of denmarke. i have purposely omitted the discourse of that battaile, as not much pertinent to our matter, as also, not to trouble you with too tedious a discourse, being content to shew you the end of this wise and valiant king hamlet, who revenging himselfe upon so many enemies, and discovering all the treasons prac- tised against his life, in the end served for a sport to fortune, and an example to all great personages that trust overmuch to the felicities of this world, that are of small moment, and lesse continuance. the king of england perceiving that hee could not easilie effect his desire upon the king, his son in lawe, as also not being willing to break the laws and rights of hospitality, determined to make a stranger the revenger of his injury, and so accomplish his oath made to fengon without defiling his handes with the blood of the husband of his daughter, and polluting his house by the traiterous massacring of his friend. in reading of this history, it seemeth, hamlet should resemble another hercules, sent into divers places of the world by euristheus (solicited by juno) where he knew any dangerous adventure, thereby to overthrow and destroy him; or else bellerophon sent to ariobatus to put him to death; or (leaving prophane histories) an other urias, by king david appointed to bee placed in the fore front of the battaile, and the man that should bee first slain by the bar- barians. for the king of englands wife being dead not long before (although he cared not for marrying an other prince of denmarke. woman) desired his sonne in lawe to make a voyage for him into scotland, flattering him in such sort, that he made him beleeve that his singular wisdome caused him to preferre him to that ambassage, assuring himselfe that it were impossible that hamlet, the subtillest and wisest prince in the worlde, should take any thing in the world in hand without effecting the same. now the queen of scots beeing a maid, and of a haughty courage, despised marriage with al men, as not esteeming any worthy to be her companion, in such manner that by reason of this arrogant opinion there never came any man to desire her love but she caused him to loose his life: but the danish kings fortune was so good, that hermetrude (for so was the queens name) hearing that hamlet was come thither to intreat a marriage between her and the king of england, forgot all her pride, and dispoiling herselfe of her sterne nature, being as then determined to make him (being the greatest prince as then living) her husband, and deprive the english princesse of her spouse, whome shee thought fit for no men but herself; and so this amazon without love, dis- daining cupid, by her free wil submitted her haughtie mind to her concupiscence. the dane arriving in her court, de- sired she to see the old king of englands letters, and mocking at his fond appetites, whose blood as then was half congealed, cast her eies upon the yong and plesant adonis of the north, esteeming her selfe happy to have such a pray fallen into her hands, wherof she made her ful account to have the posses- sion: and to conclude, she that never had been overcome by the grace, courtesie, valor, or riches of anie prince nor lord whatsoever, was as then vanquished with the onelie report of the subtilties of the dane; who knowing that he was already fianced to the daughter of the king of england, spake unto him and said: i never looked for so great a blisse, neither from the gods nor yet from fortune, as to behold in my countries the most compleate prince in the north, and he that hath made himselfe famous and renowned through all the nations of the the hystorie of hamblet, world, as well neighbours as strangers, for the only respect of his vertue, wisdom, and good fortune, serving him much in the pursuite and effect of divers thinges by him undertaken, and thinke myselfe much beholding to the king of england (although his malice seeketh neither my advancement nor the good of you, my lord) to do me so much honor as to send me so excellent a man to intreate of a marriage (he being olde, and a mortal enemy to me and mine) with mee that am such a one as every man seeth, is not desirous to couple with a man of so base quality as he, whom you have said to be the son of a slave. but on the other side, i marvel that the son of horvendile, and grand-child to king roderick, he that by his foolish wisedom and fained madnesse surmounted the forces and subtilties of fengon, and obtained the kingdom of his ad- versary, should so much imbase himselfe (having otherwise bin very wise and wel advised in all his actions) touching his bedfellow; and hee that for his excellency and valor surpass- eth humane capacity, should stoope so lowe as to take to wife her that, issuing from a servile race, hath only the name of a king for her father, for that the basenes of her blood will al- waies cause her to shewe what are the vertues and noble qua- lities of her ancestors. and you, my lord, said she, are you so ignorant as not to know that mariage should not bee measured by any foolish opinion of an outward beautie, but rather by vertues, and antiquitie of race, which maketh the wife to be honored for her prudence, and never degenerating from the in- tegritie of his ancestors: exterior beauty also is nothing, where perfection of the mind doth not accomplish and adorn that which is outwardly seen to be in the bodie, and is lost by an accident and occurrence of small moment: as also such toyes have deceived many men, and drawing them like entic- ing baits, have cast them headlong into the gulf of their ruine, dishonor, and utter overthrow. it was i to whom this advan- tage belonged, being a queen, and such a one as for nobility may compare my selfe with the greatest princes in europe, being nothing inferiour unto any of them, neither for antiqui- prince of denmarke. tie of blood, nobilitie of parents, nor abundance of riches; and i am not only a queene, but such a one as that, receiving whom i will for my companion in bed, can make him beare the title of a king, and with my body give him possession of a great kingdome, and goodly-province. think then, my lord, how much i account of your alliance, who being accus- tomed with the sword to pursue such as durst imbolden them- selves to win my love, it is to you only to whom i make a present both of my kisses, imbracings, scepter, and crown: what man is he, if he be not made of stone, that would refuse so precious a pawn as hermetrude, with the kingdome of scotland accept, sweete king, accepte this queene, who with so great love and amitie, desireth your so great profit, and can give you more contentment in one day then the princesse of england wold yeeld you pleasure during her life: although shee surpass me in beauty, her bloud beeing base it is fitter for such a king as you are to chuse her- metrude, lesse beautiful but noble and famous, rather then the english lady with great beawtie, but issuing from an un- known race, without any title of honor. now think if the dane, hearing such forcible resons and un- derstanding that by her which he half doubted, as also moved with choller for the treason of his father in law, that purposely sent him thether to loose his life, and being welcomed, kist, and playd withal by this queen, yong and reasonable fair, if he were not easie enough to be converted, and like to forget the affection of his first wife, with this to enjoy the realme of scotland, and so open the waie to become king of all greate britain: that, to conclude, he marryed her, and led her with him to the king of englands court, which moved the king from that time for- ward much more to seek the meanes to bereave him of his life; and had surely done it, if his daughter, hamlets other wife, more careful of him that had rejected her then of her fathers welfare, had not discovered the enterprise to hamlet, saying: i know well, my lord, that the allurements and per- swasions of a bold and altogether shameles woman, being the hystorie of hamblet, more lascivious then the chast imbracements of a lawful and modest wife, are of more force to intice and charm the sences of yong men; but for my part, i cannot take take this abuse for satisfaction, to leave mee in this sorte without all cause, reason, or precedent faulte once known in mee, your loyall spouse, and take more pleasure in the aliance of her who one day will be the cause of your ruine and overthrow. and al- though a just cause of jealousye and reasonable motion of anger, dispence with mee at this time to make no more account of you then you do of me, that am not worthy to be so scorn- fully rejected; yet matrimoniall charitie shal have more force and vigour in my hart, then the disdaine which i have justly conceived to see a concubine hold my place, and a strange woman before my face injoy the pleasures of my husband. this injury, my lord, although great and offensive, which to revenge divers ladies of great renown have in times past sought and procured the death of their husbands, cannot so much restrain my good wil, but that [i] may not chuse but ad- vertise you what treason is devised against you, beseeching you to stand upon your guard, for that my fathers onely seek- ing is to bereave you of your life, which if it happen, i shall not long live after you. manie reasons induce me to love and cherish you, and those of great consequence, but especially and above all the rest, i am and must bee carefull of you, when i feele your child stirring in my wombe; for which re- specte, without so much forgetting yourselfe, you ought to make more account of me then of your concubine, whome i will love because you love her, contenting my selfe that your sonne hateth her, in regard of the wrong she doth to his mother; for it is impossible that any passion or trouble of the mind whatsoever can quench those fierce passions of love that made me yours, neither that i shold forget your favours past, when loyallie you sought the love of the daughter of the king of england. neither is it in the power of that thiefe that hath stoln your heart, nor my fathers choller, to hinder me from seeking to preserve you from the cruelty of your dissembling prince of denmarke. friend (as heeretofore by counterfetting the madman, you pre- vented the practises and treasons of your uncle fengon), the complot being determined to be executed upon you and yours. without this advertisement, the dane had surely been slain, and the scots that came with him; for the king of england, inviting his son in law to a banquet, with greatest curtesies that a friend can use to him whom he loved as himself, had the means to intrap him, and cause him dance a pittiful gal- liard, in that sort to celebrate the marriage betweene him and his new lady. but hamlet went thither with armour under his clothes, and his men in like sort; by which means he and his escaped with little hurt, and so after that hapned the battaile before spoken of, wherein the king of england losing his life, his countrie was the third time sacked by the barbarians of the ilands and countrie of denmark. chap. viii. how hamblet, being in denmarke, was assailed by wiglerus his uncle, and after betrayed by his last wife, called hermetrude, and was slaine: after whose death she marryed his enemie, wiglerus. hamlet having obtained the victory against the king of england, and slaine him, laden with great treasures and ac- companied with his two wives, set forward to saile into den- marke, but by the way hee had intelligence that wiglere, his uncle, and sonne to rodericke, having taken the royall trea- sure from his sister geruth (mother to hamblet) had also seazed upon the kingdome, saying, that neither horvendile nor any of his helde it but by permission, and that it was in him (to whom the property belonged) to give the charge therof to whom he would. but hamblet, not desirous to the hystorie of hamblet, shake and overthrowe the naturall slipperie loyaltie of the variable steppes of women, wholy without and any faithfull assurance of love, or true unfained constancy: for as a woman is ready to promise, so is shee heavy and slowe to performe and effect that which she hath promised, as she that is without end or limit in her desires, flattring her selfe in the diversitie of her wanton delights, and taking pleasure in diversitie and change of newe things, which as soone shee doth forget and growe weary off: and, to conclude, such shee is in all her actions, she is rash, covetous, and unthankefull, whatsoever good or service can bee done unto her. but nowe i perceive i erre in my discourse, vomitting such things unworthy of this sects; but the vices of hermetrude have made mee say more then i meant to speake, as also the authour, from whence i take this hystorie, hath almost made mee hold this course, i find so great a sweetnesse and live- linesse in this kinde of argument; and the rather because it seemeth so much the truer, considering the miserable successe of poore king hamlet. such was the ende of hamlet, sonne to horvendile, prince of jutie; to whom, if his fortune had been equall with his inward and naturall giftes, i know not which of the auncient grecians and romans had been able to have compared with him for vertue and excellencie: but hard fortune following him in all his actions, and yet hee vanquishing the malice of his time with the vigour of constancy, hath left us a notable example of haughtie courage, worthy of a great prince, arm- ing himselfe with hope in things that were wholy without any colour or shewe thereof, and in all his honorable actions made himselfe worthy of perpetuall memorie, if one onely spotte had not blemished and darkened a good part of his prayses. for that the greatest victorie that a man can ob- taine is to make himselfe victorious and lord over his owne affections, and that restraineth the unbridled desires of his concupiscence; for if a man be never so princely, valiant, and wise, if the desires and inticements of his flesh prevaile, prince of den marke. lsl and have the upper hand, hee will imbase his credite, and, gasing after strange beauties, become a foole, and (as it were) incensed, dote on the presence of women. this fault was in the great hercules, sampson; and the wisest man that ever lived upon the earth, following this traine, therein impaired his wit; and the most noble, wise, valiant, and discreet per- sonages of our time, following the same course, have left us many notable examples of their worthy and notable ver- tues. but i beseech you that shall reade this hystorie not to resemble the spider, that feedeth of the corruption that shee findeth in the flowers and fruites that are in the gardens, whereas the bee gathereth her hony out of the best and fayrest flower shee can finde : for a man that is well brought up should reade the lives of whoremongers, drunkards, inces- tuous, violent, and bloody persons, not to follow their steps, and so to defile himselfe with such uncleannesse, but to shunne paliardize, abstain the superfluities and drunkennesse in banquets, and follow the modestie, courtesie, and conti- nencie that recommendeth hamlet in this discourse, who, while other made good cheare, continued sober; and where all men sought as much as they could to gather together riches and treasure, hee, simply accounting riches nothing comparable to honor, sought to gather a multitude of vertues, that might make him equall to those that by them were es- teemed as gods; having not as then received the lighte of the gospell, that men might see among the barbarians, and them that were farre from the knowledge of one onelye god, that nature was provoked to follow that which is good, and those forward to imbrace vertue, for that there was never any na- tion, how rude or barbarous soever, that tooke not some plea- sure to do that which seemed good, therby to win praise and commendations, which wee have said to be the reward of vertue and good life. i delight to speak of these strange histories, and of people that were unchristned, that the vertue of the rude people maie give more splendor to our nation, the hystorie of hamblet. who seeing them so compleat, wise, prudent, and well ad- vised in their actions, might strive not only to follow (imita- tion being a small matter), but to surmount them, as our religion surpasseth their superstition, and our age more purged, subtill, and gallant, then the season wherin they lived and made their vertues knowne. fl nis. of gtheratterne painefull ad- uentures : § § . containing the moſt excel- ; ślent, pleaſant and variable hi- ſtorie of the ſtrange accidents that be- p fell vnto prince apollonius, the lady lucina his wife, and tharſia his daughter. //herein the vncertaintie of this world,and the fickle ſtate of mans life are liue- ly deſcribed. gathered into engliſh by lavr e n c e tvvi ne gentleman. imprinted at london by va- lentine simmes for the widow newman. to the worshipfull master john donning, custo- mer and jurate of the towne of rie, in sussex. being diversly mooved in mind to signifie my good will and hartie love towardes you, gentle m. donning, i could not devise any meanes more effectual, then by presenting the same to you, which had cost me some small labor and travel. not seeming therby to acquite your manifold curtesies, to- wards me diversly extended, but rather to discharge me of the note of ingratitude, which otherwise i might seeme to incurre. wherefore in steede of a greater present to counter- vaile your friendlines, i am bold, in the setting foorth of this simple pamflet under your name, to make a proffer of my thankeful heart to you againe. wherin, though want of farther abilitie appeare, yet is there no let, but that a wel-wil- ling heart may be exprest, yea, in the smallest gift. now if haply the argument hereof appeare unto you other than you could much wish, or i well afford, yet have i no feare of any great misliking, considering your natural disposition, which is to be delighted with honest pleasure, and commendable re- creation, and not to lie evermore weltering, as it were, in dole- full dumpishnesse. which thing did put me in the greater hope, that this worke would be the welcommer unto you, especially considering the detectable varietie, and the often changes and chances contained in this present historie, which cannot but much stirre up the mind and sences unto sundry affections. what ever it be, take it, i beseech you, in good part, in stead of some better thing which i might well affoord, promising the same when occasion shall serve, not being at this present so well furnished as i could wish of god: to whose good grace i recommend you and yours, both nowe and evermore. your worships to use, laurence twine. vi the table. how pirats which stole away tharsia brought her to the citie machilenta, and sold her to a common bawd; and how she preserved her virginitie .................... chap. xiii. how tharsia withstood a second assault of her vir- ginitie, and by what meanes shee was preserved ..... chap. xiv. how apollonius, comming to tharsus, and not finding his daughter, lamented her supposed death, and taking ship againe, was driven by a tempest to ma- chilenta, where tharsia was .............................. chap. xv. how athanagoras, prince of machilenta, seeing the beautie of apollonius ship, went aboord of it, and did the best he could to comfort him .................... chap. xvi. how athanagoras sent for tharsia, to make her father apollonius merrie; and how, after long circumstance, they came into knowledge one of another .............. chap. xvii. how apollonius, leaving off mourning, came into the citie machilenta, where he commanded the bawd to be burned, and how tharsia was married unto prince athanagoras .................................................. chap. xviii. how apollonius, meaning to saile into his owne countrey by tharsus, was commanded by an angell in the night to goe to ephesus, and there to declare all his adventures in the church with a loud voice ... chap. xix. how apollonius came to the knowledge of his wife the ladie lucina; and how they rejoyced at the meeting of ech other .................................... .............. chap. xx. how apollonius departed from ephesus, and sailed, himselfe, and his wife, his sonne and daughter, unto antiochia, and then to tyrus, and from thence to thar- sus, where he revenged himselfe upon stranguilio and dionisiades ........................................... .. chap. xxi. how apollonius sayled from tharsus to visite his father in law, altistrates, king of pentapolis, who died not long after apollonius comming thither........ .... chap. xxii. how apollonius rewarded the fisherman that relieved him after he had suffered shipwracke; how he dealt also with old calamitus, and likewise with the pirates that stole away tharsia.................................... chap. xxiii. how apollonius had a yong sonne and heire by his wife lucina, likewise of apollonius age, and how hee died; with some other accidents thereunto incident chap. xxiv. finis. the patterne of painfull adventures. chap. i. howe antiochus committed incest with his owne daughter, and beheaded such as sued unto her for marriage, if they coulde not resolve his ques- tions. the most famous and mightie king antiochus, which builded the goodly citie of antiochia in syria, and called it after his own name, as the chiefest seat of all his dominions, and most principal place of his abode, begat upon his wife one daughter, a most excellent and beautifull yoong ladie; who in processe of yeeres growing up, as wel in ripenesse of age, as perfection of beautie, many princes and noblemen resorted unto her for intreaty of marriage, offering inestimable riches in jointure. howbeit the king, her father, evermore requiring deliberation upon whom rather than other to be- stow his daughter, perceived eftsoones an unlawfull concu- piscence to boyle within his breast, which he augmented with an outragious flame of crueltie sparkling in his heart, so that he began to burne with the love of his owne childe more then it was beseeming for a father. thus being wrapped in the toyle of blind desire, hee sustained within himselfe a fierce conflict, wherein madnesse put modestie to flight, and he wholly yeelded himselfe unto love. wherefore, not long after, on a certaine day hee came into his daughters chamber, p the patterne of [pericles. and bidding all that were there for to depart, as though he had had some secret matter to conferre with her, the furious rage of lust pricking him forward thereunto, he violently forced her, though, seely maiden, she withstood him long to her power, and threwe away all regard of his owne honestie, and unlosed the knot of her virginitie. now, when he was departed, and she, being alone, devised within herself what it were best for her to doe, sodainelie her nurse entred in, and perceiving her face al be blubbred with teares, what is the matter, deare childe and madam (quoth she), that you sit thus sorrowfully o, my beloved nurse, an- swered the ladie, even nowe two noble names were lost within this chamber. howe so! saide the nurse. because (quoth shee) before marriage, through wicked villanie i am most shamefully defiled. and when the nurse had heard these wordes, and looking about more diligently perceived indeede what was done, being inraged with sorrowe and anger, and almost distract of her wittes, alas! what wretch or rather in- fernal feend (quoth she) durst thus presumptuously defile the bed of a princesse? ungodlinesse hath done this doede (quoth the ladie). whie, then, doe you not tell it the king your father, saide the nurse ah, nurse, answered the ladie, where is my father ? for if you well understoode the matter, the name of father is lost in me, so that i can have no remedie now but death onely. but the nurse, nowe by a few wordes perceiving the whole tale, and weying that the yong lady gave inkling of remedie by death, which she much feared, beganne to assuage her griefe with comfortable wordes, and to withdrawe her minde from that mischievous purpose. wherein she prevailed so effectually in short time, that she appeased the fresh bleeding of the greene wound, howbeit the scarre continued long time, as deepely stroken within her tender heart, before it could be throughlie cured. in the meane season, while this wicked father sheweth the countenance of a loving sire abroad in the eies of al his people, notwithstanding, within doores, and in his minde he the patterne of [pericles. cause of his comming thither. then saide the yoong prince, sir, i require to have your daughter in marriage. the king hearing that which he was unwilling to heare, looking fiercely upon him, saide unto him, doest thou knowe the conditions of the marriage! yea, sir king, said apollonius, and i see it standing upon the gate. then the king, being sharply moved, and disdaining at him, said, heare then the question which thou must resolve, or else die: i am carried with mis- chiefe : i eate my mothers fleshe, i seeke my brother my mothers husband, and i cannot finde him. apollonius having received the question, withdrew himselfe a while out of the kinges presence, and being desirous to understand what it meant, he found out the solution thereof in short space ‘through the help of god, and returned againe to the king, saying; your grace proposed a question unto me: i pray you heare the solution thereof. and wheras you said in your probleme, i am carried with mischiefe, you have not lied, for looke unto your owne selfe. but whereas you say further, i eate my mothers flesh, looke upon your daughter. now the king, as soone as he perceived that apollonius had resolved his problems, fearing lest his wickednesse should be discovered, he looked upon him with a wrathfull counte- nance, saying; thou art farre wide from the solution of my demand, and hast hit no part of the meaning thereof: where- fore thou hast deserved to be beheaded. howbeit, i will shew thee this courtesie, as to give thee thirtie daies respite to bethinke thyselfe of this matter. wherefore returne home into thine owne countrey, and if thou canst find out the solu- tion of my probleme, thou shalt have my daughter to wife : if not, thou shalt be beheaded. then apollonius, being much troubled and molested in mind, accompanying himself with a sufficient train, tooke shipping, and returned into his owne countrey. but so soone as he was departed, antiochus called unto him his steward, named thaliarchus, to whom he spake in maner following. thaliarchus, the only faithfull and trustie minister of my pericles.] painfull adventures. secrets, understand that apollonius, prince of tirus, hath found out the solution of my question. wherefore, take shipping and followe him immediately, and if thou canst not overtake him upon the sea, seeke him out when thou commest to tirus, and slay him either with sword or poyson; and when thou returnest i will bountifully reward thee. taliarchus promised to accomplish his commandement with all diligence, and taking to him his shield, with monie sufficient for the journey, departed on his way, and shortly after arrived at the coast of tirus. but apollonius was come home unto his . owne pallace long time before, and withdrawing himselfe into his studie, perused all his bookes concerning the kings pro- bleame, finding none other solution than that which he had alreadie told the king. and thus he said within himselfe: surely, unlesse i be much deceived, antiochus burneth with disordinate love of his daughter: and discoursing further with himselfe upon that point, what sayest thou now, or what intendest thou to doe, appollonius ! said he to himselfe. thou hast resolved his probleme, and yet not received his daughter, and god hath therefore brought thee away that thou shouldest not die. then brake hee off in the midst of these cogitations, and immediately commanded his ships to be pre- pared, and to be laden with an hundred thousand bushels of wheate, and with great plentie of gold, silver, and rich ap- parell, and taking unto him a few of his most trustiest ser- vants, about midnight imbarked himself, and hoysing up his sails, committed himselfe to the wide sea. the day following his subjects, the citizens, came unto the pallace to have seene their prince; but when they found him not there, the whole citie was forthwith surprised with won- derfull sorrowe, everie man lamenting that so worthy a prince [was] so sodainly gone out of sight and knowledge, no man knew whether. great was the griefe, and wofull was the wayling which they made, every man lamenting his owne pri- vate estate and the common-wealths in generall, as it alwaies hapneth at the death or losse of a good prince; which the in- the patterne of [pericles. ... habitants of tirus tooke then so heavily, in respect of their great affection, that a long time after no barbers shops were opened, the common shews and plaies surceased, baines and hoat houses were shut up, taverns were not frequented, and no man repaired unto the churches: al thing was full of sor- row and heavinesse. what shall i say!—there was nothing but heavinesse. chap. iii. how taliarchus, not finding apollonius at tirus, departeth joyfully; and apollonius, arriving at tharsus, relieveth the citie with vittell. in the middes of this sorrowfull season taliarchus commeth to tirus to execute the cruell commandement of antiochus; where, finding al-thing shut up, and a generall shew of mourn- ing, meeting with a boy in the streete, tell me, said he, or i will slay thee, for what cause is al this citie thus drowned in heavines to whom the child answered: my friend, doest thou not know the cause, that thou askest it of me? this citie mourneth because the prince therof, apollonius, return- ing back from king antiochus, can no where be found or heard of. now, as soone as taliarchus heard these tidings, he returned joyfully unto his ships, and tooke his journey backe to antiochia, and, being landed, he hastened unto the king, and fell downe on his knees before him, saying: all haile, most mightie prince, rejoice and be glad; for apollonius, being in feare of your grace, is departed no man knoweth whether. then answered the king: he may well flie away from mee, but he shall never escape my handes. and im- mediately he made proclamation, that whosoever could take that contemner of the king, apollonius prince of tirus, and bring him alive unto the kinges presence, should have an pericles.] painfull adventures. hundred talents of golde for his labour; and whosoever coulde bring his head, should have fiftie talentes. which procla- mation beeing published, not onely apollonius ennemies, but also his friendes, made all haste possible to seeke him out, al- lured thereto with covetousnesse of the money. thus was that poore prince sought for about by sea and by land, through woodes and wilde deserts, but could not be found. then the king commanded a great navie of ships to be prepared to scoure the seas abroad, if haply they might meet with him; but for that every thing requireth a time ere it can be done, in the meane season apollonius arriveth at tharsus, where, walking along by the sea side, he was espied by one of his owne servauntes, named elinatus, who landed there not long before, and overtooke him as he was going; and coming neere unto him, with dutifull obeisance said unto him: god save you, prince apollonius. but he, being saluted, did even so as noble men and princes use to doe, set light by him. but elinatus taking that behaviour unkindly, saluted him againe, saying: god save you, prince apollonius; salute me againe, and despise not povertie beautified with honestie : and if you knewe that which i know, you would take good heed to your self. then answered apollonius: if you thinke good, i pray you tell me. elinatus answered, you are by proclamation commanded to be slaine. and who, said apollonius, dares commaund by pro- clamation the prince of a countrey to be slaine! antiochus, said, elinatus. antiochus! for what cause ! demanded apollonius. for that, said elinatus, thou wouldst be unto his daughter which he himselfe is. then demanded apollo- nius, for what summe of mony is my life sold by that pro- clamation! elinatus answered, whosoever can bring you alive unto the king shall have an hundred talents of gold in re- compence; but whoso bringeth your head shall have fiftie talents of gold for his labour: and therefore i advise you, my lord, to flie unto some place for your defence. and when he had so said, he tooke his leave and departed. but apol- lonius called him againe, and said that hee would give him an the patterne of [pericles. hundred talents of gold; for, said he, receive thus much now of my povertie, where nothing is now left unto me but flight, , and pining misery. thou hast deserved the reward: where- fore draw out thy sword, and cut off my head, and present it to the king, as the most joyful sight in the world. thus mayst thou win an hundred talents of gold, and remaine with- out all blame or note of ingratitude, since i my selfe have hyred thee, in the kinges behalfe, to gratefie him with so ac- ceptable a present. then answered elinatus: god forbid, my lord, that by anie such sinister means i should deserve a re- ward. in all my life i never consented to any such matter in my heart; and, my lord, if the deed were good, the love of vertue were sufficient force to allure any man thereunto. but since it respecteth your life, to whome in consideration of the cause no man may doe violence without villanie, i com- mit both you and your matter unto god, who no doubt will be your defender. and when he had thus said, he departed. but apollonius walked forth along upon the shoare, where he had not gone farre, but he descried a man farre off coming towardes him with heavie cheere and a sorrowfull counte- nance; and his name was stranguilio, a tharsian borne, and of good reputation in the citie. to whom saide apollonius, god save you, stranguilio: and he likewise resaluted him, saying, and you likewise, my good lord apollonius: i pray you tel me what is the cause that you walk in this place thus troubled with- in your minde apollonius answered: because, being pro- mised to have king antiochus daughter to my wife, if i told him the true meaning of his question, nowe that i have so done, i am notwithstanding restrained from her. wherefore i request you it may so be, that i may live secretly in your citie; for why, i stand moreover in some doubt of the kinges farther displeasure. stranguilio answered: my lord apol- lonius, our citie at this present is verie poore, and not able to sustaine the greatnesse of your dignitie: and even now we suffer great penurie and want of vittell, insomuch that there remaineth small hope of comfort unto our citizens, but that pericles ] painfull adventures. we shall all perish by extreme famine: and now certes there resteth nothing but the fearefull image of gastly death before our eies. when apollonius heard these wordes, he said unto him: then give thankes into god, who in my flight hath brought me a land into your costes; for i have brought great store of provision with me, and i will presently give unto your citie an hundreth thousand bushels of wheate, if you will onely conceale my comming hither. at these wordes stranguilio being strooken, as it were, into a sodaine amazednesse, as it happeneth when a man is overjoyed with some glad tidinges, fell downe prostrate before prince apol- lonius feete, and saide : my lord apollonius, if you coulde, and also if it might please of your great goodnesse, in such sort as you say, to succour this afflicted and famished citie, we wil not onely receive you gladly, and conceale your abode, but also, if neede so require, willingly spend our lives in your quarrell. which promise of mine, to the intent you may heare to be confirmed by the full consent of all the citizens, might it please your grace to enter into the citie, and i most willingly will attend upon you. apollonius agreed thereto, and when they came into the citie, he mounted up into the place of judgment, to the intent he might the better be heard, and, gathering al the people to- gither, thus hee spake unto the whole multitude : ye citizens of tharsus, whom penurie of vittell pincheth at this present, understand ye, that i, apollonius prince of tirus, am deter- mined presently to relieve you: in respect of which benefite, i trust ye will be so thankfull as to conceale mine arriving hither. and know ye, moreover, that not as being driven away through the malice of king antiochus, but sayling along by the seas, i am happily fallen into your haven. wherefore, i meane to utter unto you an hundred thousand bushels of wheate, paying no more than i bought it for in mine owne countrey, that is to say, eight peeces of brasse for everie bushell. when the citizens heard this, they gave a shout for joy, crying, god save my lord apollonius' promising to live the patterne of [pericles. and die in his quarrell; and they gave him wonderfull thankes, and the whole citie was replenished with joy, and they went forthwith unto the ships, and bought the corne. but apollo- nius, doubting lest by this deede he should seeme to put off the dignitie of a prince, and put on the countenance of a merchant rather than a giver, when he had received the price of the wheate, he restored it backe againe to the use and commo- ditie of the same citie. and when the citizens perceived the great benefites which he had bestowed upon their citie, they erected in the marked place a monument in the memoriall of him, his stature, made of brasse, standing in a charret, holding corne in his right hand, and spurning it with his left foot : and on the baser foot of the pillar whereon it stoode was ingraven in great letters this superscription,-apollonius, prince of tirus, gave a gift unto the city of tharsus, whereby hee delivered it from a cruell death. chap. iiii. how apollonius, departing from tharsus by the per- swasion of stranguilio and dionisiades his wife, committed shipwracke, and was relieved by alti- strates, king of pentapolis. thus had not apollonius aboden many daies in the citie of tharsus, but stranguilio, and dionisiades his wife, ear- nestly exhorted him, as seeming very carefull and tender of his welfare, rather to addresse himselfe unto pentapolis, or among the tirenians, as a place most fit for his securitie, where he might lie, and hide himselfe in greatest assurance and tranquilitie. wherefore hereunto he resolved himselfe, and with convenient expedition prepared al things necessarie for the journey. and when the day of his departure was come, he was brought with great honour by the citizens unto --- the patterne of [pericles. , almightie god that i have escaped thy greedie jawes. where shall i now finde comfort! or who will succour him in a strange place that is not knowen and whilest he spake these wordes, hee sawe a man comming towardes him, and he was a rough fisherman, with an hoode upon his head, and a filthie leatherne pelt upon his backe, unseemely clad, and homely to beholde. when hee drewe neare, apollonius, the present necessitie constraining him thereto, fell down prostrate at his feet, and powring forth a floud of teares he said unto him : who- soever thou art, take pitie upon a poore sea-wracked man, cast up nowe naked, and in simple state, yet borne of no base degree, but sprung foorth of noble parentage. and that thou maiest in helping me knowe whome thou succour- est, i am that apollonius, prince of tyrus, whome most part of the worlde knoweth, and i beseech thee to preserve my life by shewing mee thy friendly reliefe. when the fisher- man beheld the comlinesse and beautie of the yoong gentle- man, hee was mooved with compassion towardes him, and lifted him up from the ground, and lead him into his house, and feasted him with such fare as he presently had; and the more amplie to expresse his great affection towardes him, he disrobed himselfe of his poore and simple cloke, and, dividing it into two parts, gave the one halfe thereof unto apollonius, saying: take here at my handes such poore entertainment and furniture as i have, and goe into the citie, where perhappes thou shalt finde some of better abilitie, that will rue thine estate: and if thou doe not, returne then againe hither unto mee, and thou shalt not want what may be performed by the povertie of a poore fisherman. and in the meane time of this one thing onelie i put thee in mind, that when thou shalt be restored to thy former dignitie, thou doe not despise to thinke on the basenesse of the poore peece of garment. to which apollonius answered : if i remember not thee and it, i wish nothing else but that i may sustaine the like shipwracke. pericles.] painfull adventures. and when hee had saide so, he departed on the way which was taught him, and came unto the citie gates, whereinto he entred. and while he was thinking with himselfe which waie to seeke succor to sustaine his life, he saw a boy run- ning naked through the streete, girded only with a tuell about his middle, and his head annointed with oyle, crying aloude and saying: hearken all, as well citizens as stran- gers and servants, hearken: whosoever will be washed, let him come to the place of exercise. when apollonius heard this, he followed the boy, and comming unto the place cast off his cloake, and stripped him- selfe, and entred into the baine, and bathed himselfe with the liquour. and looking about for some companion with whome he might exercise himselfe, according unto the manner of the place and countrey, and finding none, sodainelie un- looked for entred in altistrates, king of the whole land, ac- companied with a great troupe of servitours. anone he . beganne to exercise himselfe at tennis with his men, which . when apollonius espied, he intruded himselfe amongst them into the kings presence, and stroke back the ball to the king, and served him in play with great swiftnes. but when the king perceived the great nimblenesse and cunning which was in him, surpassing the residue, stand aside (quoth he unto his men) for me thinkes this yong man is more cunning than i. when apollonius heard himselfe commended, hee stept foorth boldly into the middes of the tennis court, and, taking up a racket in his hand, he tossed the ball skilfully, and with wonderful agilitie. after play, he also washed the king very reverently in the baine, and when all was done, hee tooke his leave duetifully, and so departed. when apollonius was gone, the king said unto them that were about him, i sweare unto you of truth, as i am a prince, i was never exercised nor washed better then this day, and that by the diligence of a yong man i know not what he is. and, turning back, go, said he unto one of his servants, and know what that yong man is that hath with such duty the patterne of [pericles. and diligence taken pains with me. the servant going after apollonius, and seeing him clad in a filthy fishers cloke, re- turned againe to the king, saying, if it like your grace, the 'yongman is a sea-wracked man. how knowest thou that! said the king. the servant answered: though he told me not so himselfe, yet his apparel bewraieth his state. then said the king to his servant: go apace after him, & say unto him, that the king desireth him to sup with him this night. then the servant made haste after apollonius, & did the kings message to him, which so soone as he heard, he granted thereto, much thanking the kings majestie, & came back with the servant. when they were come to the gate, the servant went in first unto the king, saying: the sea-wracked man, for whom your grace sent me, is come, but is ashamed to come into your presence, by reason of his base aray: whome the king commanded immediatly to be clothed in seemely apparell, and to be brought in to supper, and placed him at the table with him, right over against himselfe. immediately the boorde was furnished with all kinde of princelie fare, the guests fed apace, every man on that which he liked; onelie apollonius sate still and eate nothing, but earnestlie behold- ing the golde, silver, and other kingly furniture, whereof there was great plentie, hee could not refraine from sheading teares. then saide one of the guests that sate at the table unto the king : this yoong man, i suppose, envieth at your graces prosperitie. no, not so, answered the king : you sup- pose amisse; but he is sorie to remember that he hath lost more wealth then this is: and looking upon apollonius with a smiling countenance, be mery, yong man, quoth he, and eate thy meate with us, and trust in god, who doubtlesse will send thee better fortune. pericles.] tainfull adventures. chap. w. how lucina, king altistrates daughter, desirous to heare apollonius adventures, fel in love with him. now, while they sate at meate, discoursing of this and such like matters at the boord, suddenlie came in the king's daugh- ter and onlie child, named lucina, a singular beautifull ladie, and a maiden now of ripe yeeres for marriage: and she ap- proached nigh, and kissed the king her father, and al the guests that sate with him at the table. and when she had so done, she returned unto her father, and saide : good father, i pray you, what yongman is this which sitteth in so honour- able a place over against you, so sorrowfull and heavie ' o, sweete daughter, answered the king, this yong man is a sea- wracked man, and hath done me great honour to day at the baines and place of exercise, for which cause i sent for him to sup with me; but i knowe not neither what, neither whence he is. if you be desirous to know these things, demaund of him, for you may understand all things; and peradventure when you shall knowe, you will be mooved with compassion towardes him. nowe, when the lady perceived hir fathers mind, she turned about unto apollonius, and saide, gentleman, whose grace and comlinesse sufficiently bewraieth the nobi- litie of your birth, if it be not grievous unto you, shew me your name, i beseech you, and your adventures. then an- swered apollonius: madam, if you aske my name, i have lost it in the sea: if you enquire of my nobilitie, i have left that at tyrus. sir, i beseech you, then said the lady lucina, tel me this more plainly, that i may understand. then apolonius, craving licence to speake, declared his name, his birth and nobilitie, and unripped the whole tragedie of his adventures, in order as is before rehearsed; and when he had made an end of speaking, he burst forth into most plentifull teares. which when the king beheld, he saide unto lucina: the patterne of [pericles. deere daughter, you have done evill in requiring to know the yong mans name, and his adventures, wherein you have renued his forepassed griefes. but since nowe you have understoode all the trueth of him, it is meete, as it becommeth the daughter of a king, you likewise extend your liberalitie towards him, and whatsoever you give him, i will see it be perfourmed. then lucina, having already in hir heart professed to doe him good, and nowe perceiving very luckily her fathers mind to be inclined to the desired purpose, she cast a friendly looke upon him, saying: apollonius, nowe lay sorrowe aside, for my father is determined to inrich you: and apollonius, according to the curtesie that was in him, with sighes and sobbes at remembrance of that whereof he had so lately spoken, yeeld- ed great thankes unto the faire ladie lucina. then saide the king unto his daughter: madame, i pray you take your harpe into your handes, and play us some musike to refresh our guests withall, for we have all too long hearkened unto sorrowful matters. and when she had called for her harpe, she beganne to play so sweetely, that all that were in companie highly commended her, saying that in all their lives they never heard pleasanter harmonie. thus whilst the guests, every man for his part, commended the ladies cunning, onely apollonius spake nothing. then saide the king unto him : you are too blame, apollonius, since all praise my daughter for her excellencie in musike, and you commend not her, or rather dispraise her by holding your peace. apollonius answered: my soveraigne and good lord, might it please you to pardon me, and i will say what i think: the lady lucina your daughter is pretily entred; but she is not yet come to perfection in musike. for proofe whereof, if it please your grace to command the harp to be delivered unto me, she shall well perceive, that she shal heare that which she doth not yet know. the king answered: i see well, apollonius, you have skill in all things, and is nothing to be wished in a gentleman, but you have perfectly learned it: wherefore, hold; i pray you take the harpe, and let us heare pericles.] painfull adventures. some part of your cunning. when apollonius had received the harp, he went forth, and put a garland of flowers upon his head, and fastned his raiment in comly manner about him, and entred into the parlour againe, playing before the king and the residue with such cunning and sweetnes, that he seemed rather to be apollo then apollonius, and the kings guests confessed that in al their lives they never heard the like before. but when lucina had heard and seene what was done, she felt hir selfe sodainely mooved within, and was sharpelie surprised with the love of apollonius, and, turning to her father: nowe suffer me, good father, saide she, to give unto this yoong gentleman some reward, according as i shall thinke convenient. i give you leave to do so, faire daughter, saide the king. then she, looking towards apollonius, my lord apollonius, saide she, receive heere of my fathers liberalitie two hundred talents of gold, foure hundred poundes of silver, store of raiment, twentie men servants, and tenne handmaidens, nowe therefore, said she unto the officers that stood by, bring hither all these things which i have here promised, and jay them downe in the parlour in the presence of our friends, and immediately they were all brought into their sight as she had commaunded. when this was done, the guests arose from the table, and, giving thankes unto the king and laulie lucina, tooke their leave and departed. and apollonius, thinking it likewise time for him to be gone, most gratious king altistrates (quoth he) thou which art a comforter of such as are in miserie; and thou also, renowned princesse, a favourer of philosophie, and lover of all good studies, i bid you now most heartily farewell. as for your great deserts toward me, i leave them to god to requite you with deserved recompence: and, looking unto his wervants which the ladie lucina had given him, sirs, take up this geere, quoth hee, which is given me, and bring it away, and let us go seeke some lodgings. when lucina heard those words she was sodainlie stroken into a dump, fearing that she shoulde have lost her newe q the patterne of [pericles. lover, before she had ever reaped anie fruit of his companie, and therefore, turning to her father, said: i beseech you, good father and gratious king, forasmuch as it has pleased you this day to inrich apolonius with many great gifts, you would not suffer him now to depart so late, lest he be by some naughtie persons spoiled of the things which you have given him. the king willingly granted the ladies request, and com- manded forthwith that there should be a faire lodging pre- pared for him and his, where he might lie honourably; and when he sawe convenient time he went to bed, and tooke his rest. c h a p. v. i. how apollonius is made schoolemaster to lucina, and how she preferreth the love of him above all the nobilitie of pentapolis. when night was come, and every one was at rest, lucina laie unquietly tumbling in her bed, alwaies thinking upon apollonius, and could not sleep; wherefore in the morn- ing she rose very early, and came into the king her fathers chamber; whom when her father saw, what is the matter, daughter lucina (quoth he) that contrary to custome you be stirring so earelie this morning ! deere father, quoth lucina, i could take no rest al this night, for the desire i have to learn musicke of apollonius; and therefore i pray you, good father, to put me unto him to be instructed in the art of musicke, and other good qualities wherein hee is skilfull. when altistrates heard his daughters talke, he smiled within himselfe, when hee perceived the warmed affection kindled within her breast, which with so seemely a pretence she had covered, as the desire to learne, and determined in part presently to satisfie her request: and when time served, pericles.] pa infull adventures. he sent a messenger for apollonius, and when he was come, he said unto him : apollonius, my daughter much desireth to be your scholler, and therefore i pray you take her to your governement, and instruct her the best you can, and i will reward you to your contentation. apollonius answered, gracious prince, i am moste willing to obey your commaunde- ment. so hee tooke the ladie, and instructed her in the best maner he coulde, even as himselfe had learned ; wherein she profited so well, that in short time she matched, or rather surpassed her maister. thus increased shee not onely in learning, but grew also daily in more fervent love of apollonius, as, whether stand- ing in doubt of her fathers resolute good wil if he were moved concerning marriage, or fearing the time woulde be deferred in respect whereof she was presently ready, in so much that she fell sicke and became weaker everie day than other. when the king perceived his daughters infirmitie to increase, hee sent immediatlie throughout all the dominions for the learnedst phisitions to search out her griefe and to cure it, who examining her urine, and feeling her pulse, coulde finde out no manifest cause or substance of her dis- ease. after a few dayes that this happened, three noble yong men of the same countrey, which had been suters a long time unto lucina for marriage, came unto the court, and being brought into the kinges presence saluted him duti- fully. to whom the king said, gentlemen, what is the cause of your comming! they answered, your grace hath often- times promised to bestow your daughter in marriage upon one of us, and this is the cause of our comming at this time. wee are your subjectes, wealthie, and descended of noble families; might it therefore please your grace to choose one among us three, to be your sonne in law. then answered the king: you are come unto me at an unseasonable time, for my daughter now applieth her studie, and lieth sicke for the desire of learning, and the time is much unmeet for marriage. but to the intent you shall not altogither loose your labour, q the patterne of [pericles. nor that i will not seeme to deferre you too long, write your names every one severally in a peece of paper, and what joynter you will make, and i will send the writinges to my daughter, that she may choose him whom she best liketh of. they did forthwith as the king had counselled them, and delivered the writings unto the king, which he read, and signed them, and delivered them unto apollonius, saying: take here these billes, and deliver them to your scholler; which apollonius received, and tooke them immediatly into the ladie lucina. now when she sawe her schoolemaister, whom she loved so entirely, she saide unto him: maister, what is the cause that you come alone into my chamber apollonius answered: madame, i have brought writings from the king your father, which he willeth you to reade. lucina then received the writinges, and brake them open, and when she had reade the names of the three noblemen, her suters, shee threw away the billes, and looking upon apollonius, said unto him: my welbeloved schoolemaister apollonius, doth it not greeve you that i shall be married unto another apollonius answered, no madame, it greeveth not me, for whatsoever shall be for your honour, shall be unto me profit- able. then said lucina, maister, if you loved me you woulde be sorie; and therewithall she called for inke and paper, and wrote an answere unto her father in forme following. gracious king and deare father, forasmuch as of your goodnesse you have given me free choice, and libertie to write my minde, these are to let you understand, that i would marry with the sea-wrecked man, and with none other: your humble daughter, lucina. and when she had sealed it, she delivered it unto apol- lonius, to be carried unto the king. when the king had received the letters, he perused them, wherein he perceived his daughters minde, not knowing whom she meant by the sea-wrecked man; and therefore, turning himselfe towardes the three noblemen, hee demanded of them which of them had suffered shipwracke! then one of them, named ardo- pericles.] painfull adventures. nius, answered, if it like your grace, i have suffred ship- wrack the other twaine, named munditius and carnillus, when they heard him say so, waxed wroth, and fel into termes of outrage against him, saying: sicknesse, and the fiends of hell consume thee, for thy foule and impudent lie. do not we, who are thy equals both of birth and age, know right well that thou never wentest almost out of this citie gates, and how couldest thou then suffer shipwracke? now when the king altistrates could not finde out which of them had suffered shipwrack, he looked towards apollonius, say- ing: take these letters and read them, for it may be that i doe not knowe him whom thou knowest, who was present. apollonius receiving the letters, perused them quickly, and perceiving himselfe to be loved, blushed wonderfully. then said the king to apollonius, hast thou found the sea-wrecked man? but apollonius answered little or nothing, wherein his wisedome the rather appeared according to the saying of the wise man, in many words there wanteth discretion; whereas contrariwise, many an indiscreet person might be accounted wise if hee had but this one point of wisdom, to hold his tongue. wherin indeed consisteth the whole triall, or rather insight of a man, as signified the most wise philo- sopher socrates. chap. vii. how apollonius was married to the ladie lucina, and hearing of king antiochus death, departeth with his wife towards his owne countrey of tyrus. but to returne againe to my storie, from which i have digressed. when king altistrates perceived that apollonius was the man whom his daughter lucina disposed in her heart to preferre in love, before anie of the other three noble pericles.] painfull adventures. childe and daughter to thine instruction. as these have caused mee to preferre thee, so have they made my daughter to love thee, so that i am as well contented with one, as i am well pleased with the other. and for thy part likewise, i hope, apollonius, that as thou hast been glad to be my client, thou wilt rejoyce as much to be my sonne in law. tell me thy minde out of hand, for i attend thine answere. then apollonius, much abashed at the kinges talke, falling downe upon his knees, answered: most gratious soveraigne, your wordes sound so strangely in mine eares, that i scarcely know how to give answer, and your goodnesse hath been so great towardes me, that i can wish for no more. but since it is your graces pleasure that i should not be indebted to many, but owe all thing unto you, as life, and wife, honour, and goods, and all, you shall not find me unthankful, how- soever god or fickle fortune deale with me, to remaine loyall and constant to you and your daughter, whom above all creatures, both for birth and beauty and good qualities, i love and honour most intirely. altistrates rejoiced much to heare so wise and conformable an answere, and embracing apol- lonius, called him by the name of deare beloved sonne. the next day morning the king addressed his messengers and pursevants, to assemble the nobliest of his subjects and frends out of the confederat cities and countries, and to shew them that he had certaine affaires to communicat unto them : and when they were come altogither unto pentapolis, after due greeting, and accustomable intertainments shewed as in the maner of great estates, he said thus unto them : my loving friends, and faithfull subjects, my meaning was to let you understand, that my daughter is desirous to marrie with her schoolemaster apollonius, and i am wel pleased therwith. wherfore, i beseech you all to rejoyce thereat, and be glad, for my daughter shal be matched to a wise man. and know you, moreover, that i appoint this day six weekes for the solemnization day of the marriage, at what time i desire you all to be here present, that like friends we may rejoyce, and pericles.] painfull adventures. ment, and thus went they forth togither, hand in hand, after whom, as is already declared, the lordes and ladies followed by three and three in a ranke. when the solemnities were done at the church, and the wordes spoken, and the princes joyned in marriage, they returned home and went to dinner. what shall i nowe speake of the noble cheare and princely provision for this feast ! and after dinner of the exquisite musicke, fine dauncing, heavenly singing, sweete devising, and pleasant communication among the estates? i may not discourse at large of the liberall challenges made and pro- claimed at the tilt, barriers, running at the ring, joco di can, managing fierce horses, running a foote, and daunsing in armour. and at night of the gorgeous plaies, shewes, dis-. guised speeches, masks and mummeries, with continuall har-, mony of all kindes of musicke, and banquetting in all deli- cacie. all these thinges i leave to the consideration of them which have seene the like in the courts, and at the weddinges of princes, where they have seene more than my simple pen is able to describle, or may be comprehended within the recital of so short an historie. when night was come, and revels were ended, the bride was brought to bed, and apol- lonius tarried not long from her, where hee accomplished the duties of marriage, and faire lucina conceived childe the same night. the next daie every man arose to feasting and jollitie for the wedding triumphes continued an whole moneth. this while lucinas bellie began to grow, and as it fortuned that the lord apollonius and his ladie on a day walked along the sea side for their disporte, hee sawe a faire shippe fleeting under saile, which hee knew well to be of his countrey, and he hallowed unto the maister, whose name was calamitus, and asked of him of whence his ship was the maister answered, of tyrus. thou thas named my country, said apollonius: art thou then of tyrus, said the maister? yea, answered apollonius. then, said the maister, knowest thou one apollonius, prince of that countrey ! if thou doe, or shalt heare of him heereafter, bid him now be glad and re- the patterne of [pericles. joyce, for king antiochus and his daughter are strooken dead with lightning from heaven; and the citie of antiochia with all the riches, and the whole kingdome are reserved for apollonius. with these words, the ship being under saile, departed, and apollonius being filled with gladnes, immedi- atly began to breake with his ladie to give him leave to go and receive his kingdom. but when faire lucina heard him beginne to moove words of departing, she burst out into teares, saying: my lorde, if you were nowe in some farre countrie, and heard say that i were neere my time to be de- livered, you ought to make haste home unto me. but since you be nowe with me, and know in what case i am, me thinks you should not now desire to depart from me. how- beit, if your pleasure be so, and tarriance breede danger, and kingdomes want not heirs long, as i would not perswade you to tarry, so doe i request you to take me with you. this discreete answere pleased apollonius well; wherefore he kissed his lady, and they agreed it should be so. and when they were returned from walking, lucina rejoycing came unto the king her father, saying, deare father, rejoice i be- seech you, and be glad with my lord apollonius and me, for the most cruell tyrant antiochus and his daughter are by the just judgement of god destroied with lightning from heaven; and the kingdome and riches are reserved for us to inherite. moreover, i pray you good father, let me have your goodwil to travel thither with my husband. the king rejoyced much at this tidings, and graunted her reasonable request, and also commaunded all things to be provided im- mediatly that were necessary for the journey. the shippes were strongly appointed and brought unto the shoare, and fraught with al things convenient, as golde, silver, apparell, bedding, vittells, and armour. moreover, whatsoever for- tune might befal, the king prepared to sail with them ligo- zides the nurse, and a midwife, and all things meet for the childe whensoever lucina should neede them: and with great honour himselfe accompanieth them unto the sea side, when pericles.] pa infull adventures. the time appointed for their departure was come; where with many teares, and great fatherly affection hee kissed his daughter, and embraced his sonne in law, and recommended them unto god, in whome hee did wish unto them a most prosperous journey, and so returned unto his pallace. chap. viii. how faire lucina died in travell of child upon the sea; and being throwen into the water, was cast on land at ephesus, and taken home by cerimon, a phisition. the marriners immediatly merrily hoissed saile and de- parted; and when they had sailed two dayes, the master of the shippe warned apollonius of a tempest approching, which nowe came on, and increased so fast, that all the companie was amazed, and lucina, what with sea-sicknes and feare of danger, fel in labor of child, wherewith she was [so] weakened, that there was no hope of recoverie, but she must now die; yet being first delivered of a faire daughter, insomuch that. now all tokens of life were gone, and she appeared none other: but to be dead. when apollonius beheld this heavie spec- tacle no heart was able to conceive his bitter grief, for like a mad man distracted, he tore his cloths, and rent his haire, and laying himself upon the carkas, he uttered these wordes with great affection. o, my deare lady and wife, the daugh- ter of king altistrates, what shall i now answer to thy father for thee! would god thou haddest remained with him at home; and if it had pleased god to have wrought this his pleasure in thee, it had rather chanced with thy loving father, in his quiet land, than with me thy woful husband upon the wild seas. the whole company also made great lamentation the patterne of [pericles. for her, bewailing the death of so noble and beautifull a ladie, and so curteous a gentlewoman. howbeit, in the hotest of the sorrowe the governour of the ship came unto apollonius, saying, my lord, plucke up your heart, and be of good cheere, and consider, i pray you, that the ship may not abide to carrie the dead carkas, and therefore command it to be cast into the sea, that we may the better escape. then answered apollonius: what saiest thou, varlet? wouldest thou have me cast this bodie into the sea, which received me into house and favour, when i was in miserie, and drenched in the water, wherein i lost ship, goods, and all ! but taking further consultation, and advising himselfe what were best to do, he called certaine of his men unto him, and thus he devised with them. my trusty servants, whome this common mischance grieveth as wel as me, since sorow- ing wil not help that which is chanced, assist me, good sirs, to provide for the present necessity. let us make forthwith a large chest, and bore the lid full of small holes, and we will seare it all over within with pitch and rosen molten together, whereinto we will put cunningly a sheete of lead, and in the same we will inclose the tender corps of the wife of me, of all other a most unfortunate husband. this was no sooner said, but it was almost likewise done with semblable celeritie. then tooke they the body of the faire lady lucina, and arraied her in princely apparel, and layd her into the chest, and apollonius placed a great summe of golde at her head, and a great treasure of silver at her feet, and he kissed her, letting fall a flood of salt teares on her face, and he wrote a bill, and put it in also, the tenor whereof was in forme as foloweth:—whosoever shal find this chest, i pray him to take ten pieces of gold for his paines, and to bestowe tenne pieces more upon the buriall of the corpes; for it hath left many teares to the parents and friends, with dolefull heaps of sorow and heavines. but whosoever shall doe otherwise than the present griefe requireth, let him die a shamefull death, and let there be none to bury his body.—and then pericles.] painfull adventures. closing all up verie safe, commaunded the chest to be lifted overboorde into the sea, and willed the childe to be nursed with all diligence, that if ever fortune should so fall, he might pre- sent unto good king altistrates a neece in steede of a daughter. now fleeted away the ship fast with the wind, and the coffin tumbled backeward with the tide, and apollonius could not keep his eie from the bodie whereon his heart rested, untill kenning failed, and the sea rose up with a banke between. there were two days passed, and the night was now at hand, when the next day morning the waves rolled foorth this chest to the land, and cast it ashore on the coast of ephesus. not farre from that place there dwelt a physition, whose name was cerimon, who by chaunce walking abroad upon the shore that day with his schollers, found the chest which the sea had cast up, and willed his servants to take it up, and diligently to cary it to the next towne, where hee dwelt; and they did so. when cerimon came home he opened the chest, marveling what should be therein, and found a lady arayed in princely apparell and ornaments, very faire and beautifull to beholde, whose excellencie in that respect as many as beheld were strangely affectioned thereat, perceiving such an incomparable gleame of beautie to be resident in her face, wherein nature had not committed the least errour that might be devised, saving that shee made her not immortall. the haire of her head was naturally as white as snowe, under which appear- ed her goodly forehead, faire and large, wherein was neither blemish nor wrinkle. her eies were like two starres turning about in their naturall course, not wantonly roving here and there, but modestly mooving as governed by reason, repre- senting the stabilitie of a setled mind. her eie brows decently commending the residue of her countenance. her nose straight, as in were drawen with a line, comely dividing her cherry cheeks asunder, not reaching foorth too long, nor cut off too short, but of a commendable proportion. hir necke was like the white alablaster, shining like the bright sunne beames, wonderfully delighting the mindes of the beholders. her the patterne of [pericles. bodie of comely stature, neither too high nor too lowe, not scregged with leanenesse, nor undecently corpulent, but in such equality consisting that no man woulde wish it otherwise. from her shoulders sprang foorth her armes, representing two branches growing out of a tree, beautified with a white hand, and fingers long and slender, surpassing to behold. to be short, such was the excellencie of her beutie in each respect, that it could suffer no deformitie to accompany it, whereby also may be discerned a singular perfection of her minde, created by god and infused into her bodie, whereby it was mooved, and those good qualities of hers expressed in opera- tion; so that all outward beautie of the bodie proceedeth from the inward beuty of the mind, from whence sprang up the olde and true saying of the wisest philosophers, that the sun- dry nature of the forme or soule, diversely disposeth the matter according unto its owne qualitie; as it expresly ap- peared in the beutiful countenaunce and stature of this ladies bodie, whereof cerimon stoode amazedly taking the view. chap. ix. how lucina was restored to life by one of cerimon the phisitions schollers; and howe cerimon adopted her to his daughter, and placed her in the temple of diana. the surpassing beauty of faire lucina being such as is before recited, no woonder it was though cerimon were mar- vellously ravished at the sight, whereby his affection in- forced him to breake out into these words. alas, good, beau- tiful gentlewoman, what unhappy and cruell chance hath thus made thee away, and caused thee to be so wofully forsaken' and as he spake those wordes, hee perceived the golde that pericles.] painfull adventures. lay at her head, and the silver that lay at her feet, with a scroll of paper written, the which hee tooke up and read, the tenor whereof was this:—whosoever shal finde this chest, i pray him for to take tenne pieces of golde for his paines, and to bestowe tenne peeces more on the buriall of the corps; for it hath left many teares to the parents and friends, with dole- full heapes of sorrowe and heavinesse. but whosoever shall doe otherwise than the present griefe requireth, let him die a shamefull death, and let there be none to burie his bodie.— and as soone as he had read over the writing, he said unto his servants, now let us perfourme unto the bodie that which the sorrowe requireth; and i sweare to you, by the hope which i have to live, that i wil bestow more money upon the accomplishing of the same, than the sorrowful scedul requireth. wherfore, according to the maner of the buriall which was at that time to burn to bodies of the dead, and to burie the ashes, gathered up and put into pottes, he commaunded a pile of wood to be erected, and upon the top thereof he caused the body to be layed. now, cerimon had a scholler in physicke, whose name was . machaon, very towardly in his profession, of yeres but yong, . but antient in wit and experience, who, comming in while these things were doing, and beholding so beautifull a corps layd upon the pile, he stoode still and wondered at it: which thing cerimon perceiving, thou art come in good time, said he to machaon, and i looked for thee about this time: take this flagon of pretious ointment, and powre it uppon the corps, being the last ceremonie of the sepulture. then came machaon unto the corps, and pulled the clothes from the ladies bosome, and poured foorth the ointment, and bestowing it abroad with his hand, perceived some warmth in her breast, and that there was life in the body. machaon stoode aston- ished, and hee felt her pulses, and layde his cheeke to her mouth, and examined all other tokens that he could devise, and he perceived how death strived with life within her, and that the conflict was dangerous and doubtfull, who should the patterne of [pericles. prevaile. then saide he unto the servants: set fire unto the wood at the foure corners of the pile, and cause it to burne moderatly, and bring me hither a bed, that i may take the body out of the chest, and lay it thereon. this being done, he chafed the body against the fire, untill the blood, which was congealed with colde, was wholly re- solved. then went machaon unto his master cerimon and saide: the woman whome thou thinkest to be dead is alive, and that you may the better beleeve my saying, i will plainely proove it to be so. and when he had so saide, he tooke the body reverently in his armes, and bare it into his owne chamber, and layed it upon his bed groveling upon the breast. then tooke he certaine hote and comfortable oyles, and warming them uppon the coales, he dipped faire wooll therein, and fomented all the bodie over therewith, until such time as the congealed blood and humours were throughly resolved, and the spirits eſtsoones recovered their wonted course, the veines waxed warme, the arteries beganne to beate, and the lungs drew in the fresh ayre againe, and she opened her eies and looked about, and being perfectly come to her— selfe, what art thou! said shee unto machaon: see thou touch me not otherwise than thou oughtest to do, for i am a kings daughter, and the wife of a king. when machaon heard her speak these words, he was exceeding glad, and he ran unto his master and saide: sir, the woman liveth, and speaketh perfectly. then answered cerimon: my welbeloved scholler machaon, i am glad of this fortunate chaunce, and i much commend thy wisedome, and praise thy learning, and cannot but extoll thy diligence. wherefore be not unthankfull to thy knowledge, but receive heere the reward which is due unto thee, namely, that which by the writing was appointed to be bestowed uppon her buriall; for thou hast restored her unto life, and shee hath brought with her great summes of mony. when he had so saide, they came unto her and saluted her, and caused her to be apparelled with wholsome and comfortable clothes, and to be refreshed with good meats. pericles.] painfull adventures. a few daies after, when she had fully recovered strength, and cerimon by communication knew that she came of the stocke of a king, he sent for many of his friends to come unto him, and he adopted her for his owne daughter: and she, with many teares, requiring that she might not be touched by any man, for that intent he placed her in the temple of diana, which was there at ephesus, to be preserved there inviolably among the religious women. chap. x. how apollonius, arriving at tharsus, delivereth his yong daughter tharsia unto stranguilio and dio- nisiades to be brought up; and how the nurce, , lying in her death-bed, declareth unto tharsia who were her parents. let us leave now a while the lady lucina among the holy nunnes in the temple of diana, at ephesus, and let us looke backe unto sorrowful apollonius, whose ship with for- tunate winde, and the good providence of god directing the same, arrived at the shoare of tharsus, where hee immedi- ately came forth of the ship, and entred into the house of stranguilio and dionisiades, whom he saluted, and told them the heavy chances that had befallen him, both of the great stormes and tempests on the sea which hee had endured, as also of the death of the good lady lucina, his wife : howbeit, said he, god be thanked, my daughter remaineth alive, for the which i am very glad; wherfore, deare friends stran- guilio and dionisiades, according to the trust which i have in you, i mean in some things to use your friendship, while i go about to recover the kingdome which is reserved for me. for i will not returne backe againe unto king altistrates, my r the patterne of [pericles. father-in-law, whose daughter, alas! i have lost in the sea; but meaning rather to exercise the trade of merchandize, i commit my daughter unto you, to bee nourished and brought up with your yoong daughter philomacia, and i will that my daughter be called tharsia. moreover, i wil leave my deare wife lu- cinas nurce here also, called ligozides, to tend the child, that she may be lesse troublesome unto you. and when hee had made an end of talking, he delivered the infant and the nurce unto stranguilio, and therewithal great store of gold, silver, and raiment; and hee sware a solemne othe, that he would not poule his head, clip his beard, nor pare his nailes, untill hee had married his daughter at ripe yeares. they wondred much at so strange an othe, promising faithfully to bring up his daughter with all diligence. when these things were ended according to his mind, apollonius tooke his leave, departed unto his ship, and sailed into far countries, and unto the uppermost parts of egypt. therewhile the yoong maiden, tharsia, sprang up in yeeres, and when she was about five yeares olde, being free borne, she was set to schoole with other free children, alwaies jointly accompanied with philomacia, being of the same age that she was of the time passed forth apace, and tharsia grew up so wel in learning as in yeers; untill comming to the age of fourteene yeeres, one day, when she returned from schoole, she found ligozides, her nurce, so- dainly falne sicke; and, sitting beside her upon the bed, de- manded of her the cause and maner of her sickenesse. then saide the nurce unto her, hearken unto my wordes, deare daughter tharsia, and lay them up in thine heart. whom thinkest thou to be thy father and thy mother, and in what countrey supposest thou wast thou borne | tharsia answered, why, nurce, why aske you me this question? stranguilio is my father, dionisiades my mother, and i was borne in thar- sus. then sighed the nurce, and saide, no, sweete tharsia, no; thou art deceived. but hearken unto me, and i will de- clare unto thee the beginning of thy birth, to the intent thou - the patterne of [pericles. chap. xi. how, after the death of ligozides, the murce, dioni- siades, envying at the beautie of tharsia, conspired her death, which should have been accomplished by a villaine of the countrey. tharsia much lamented the death of ligozides, her murce, and caused her bodie to be solemnly buried not farre of in a field without the walles of the citie, and mourned for her an whole yeere following. but when the yeare was expired, she put off her mourning atire, and put on other apparel, and frequented the schooles and the studie of liberall sciences, as before. and whensoever she returned from schoole, she would receive no meate before she had visited her nurces sepulchre, which she did daily, entring thereinto, and carrying a flagon of wine with her, where she used to abide a space, and to call uppon her father and mother. now, on a day it fortuned, that as she passed through the street with dioni- siades, and her companion philomacia, the people, beholding the beautie and comlinesse of tharsia, said, happy is that father that hath tharsia to his daughter, but her companion that goeth with her is foule and evill favoured. when dio- nisiades heard tharsia commended, and her owne daughter philomacia so dispraised, shee returned home wonderfull wroth, and, withdrawing herselfe into a solitary place, began thus secretly to discourse of the matter. it is now fourteen yeares since apollonius, this foolish girles father, departed from hence, and he never sendeth letters for her, nor any re- membrance unto her, whereby i conjecture that he is dead. ligozides, her nurce, is departed, and there is no bodie now of whom i should stand in feare, and therefore i will now slay her, and dresse up mine owne daughter in her apparell and jewels. when shee had thus resolved her selfe uppon this wicked purpose, in the meane while there came home one of the patterne of [pericles. princely ornaments. o, said the mayden, would to god he had not done so! but i pray thee, theophilus, since there is no hope for me to escape with life, give mee'licence to say my praiers before i die. i give thee licence, saide the villaine; and i take god to record that i am constrained to murther thee against my will. chap. xii. how certaine pyrats rescued tharsia when she should have been slaine, and carried her unto the citie machilenta to be sold among other bond- slaves. as fortune, or rather the providence of god served, while 'tharsia was devoutly making her praiers, certaine pyrats which were come aland, and stood under the side of an hill watching for some prey, beholding an armed man offering vio- lence unto a mayden, cried unto him, and said: thou cruel tyrant! that maiden is our prey and not thy victorie; and ther- fore hold thine hands from her, as thou lovest thy life. when the villain heard that, he ran away as fast as he could, and hid himselfe behind the sepulchre. then came the pyrats and rescued tharsia, and carried her away to their ships, and hoysed saile, and departed. and the villaine returned home to his mistres, and saide unto her : that which you commaunded me to doe is dispatched, and therefore now i thinke it good that you put on a mourning garment, and i also, and let us counterfeit great sorrowe and heavinesse in the sight of all the people, and say that shee died of some greevous disease. but stranguilio himselfe consented not to this treason, but so soone as hee heard of the foule mischaunce, beeng as it were a mopte, and mated with heavinesse and griefe, he clad himselfe in mourning aray, and lamented that wo- pericles.] painfull adventures. full case, saying, alas, in what a mischiefe am i wrapped what might i doe, or say herein the father of this mayden delivered this citie from the peril of death; for this cities sake he suffered shipwracke, lost his goodes, and endured penury, and now he is requited with evil for good. his daughter, which he committed unto me to be brought up, is now de- voured by a most cruell lionesse : thus i am deprived as it were of mine owne eies, & forced to bewaile the death of an innocent, and am utterly spoiled through the fierce biting of a moste venemous serpent. then casting his eies up towards heaven, o god, said hee, thou knowest that i am innocent from the bloud of silly tharsia, which thou hast to require at dionisiades handes: and there withall he looked towards his wife, saying, thou wicked woman! tell me, how hast thou made away prince apollonius daughter thou that livest both to the slaunder of god and man dionisiades answered in manie wordes, evermore excusing herselfe, and, moderating the wrath of stranguilio. shee counterfeited a fained sorrowe by attiring her selfe and her daughter in mourning apparell, and in dissembling teares before the people of the citie, to whom shee saide: dearly beloved friendes and citizens of tharsus, for this cause we doe weepe and mourne in your sight, because the joy of our eyes and staffe of our olde age, the mayden tharsia, is dead, leaving untous bitter teares and sorrowfull heartes. yet have we alreadie taken order for her funerals, and buried her according to her degree. these wordes were right greevous unto the people, and there was almost none that let not fall some teares for sor- rowe. and they went with one accord unto the market - place, whereas her fathers image stood, made of brasse, and erected also another unto her there with this inscription: unto the virgin tharsia, in liew of her fathers benefites, the citizens of tharsus have erected this monument. the patterne of [pericles. chap. xiii. how the pirats which stole away tharsia brought her to the citie machilenta, and solde her to a com- mon bawd; and how she preserved her virginitie. the meane time, while these troubles were at tharsus, the pirats being in their course upon the sea by benefite of happie winde arrived at machilenta, and came into the citie. nowe, had they taken manie mo men and women besides tharsia, whom all they brought a shoare, and set them to sell as slaves for money. then came there sundrie to buy such as they lacked for their purposes, amongst whom a moste vile man- bawd, beholding the beautie and tender yeeres of tharsia, offered money largely for her. howbeit, athanagoras, who was prince of the same citie, beholding likewise the noble countenance, and regarding the great discretion of the may- den in communication, out-bid the bawd, and offered for her ten sestercies of gold. but the bawd, being loth to loose so commodious a prey, offered twenty. and i wil give thirty, said athanagoras. nay, i wil give forty, said the bawd; and i fiftie, quoth athanagoras: and so they continued in outbid- ding one an other untill the bawd offered an hundred sester- cies of gold to be payed ready downe: and whosoever wil give more, saide he, i will yet give ten sestercies more than he. then prince athanagoras thus bethought him secretly in his minde: if i should contend with the bawd to buy her at so hie a price, i must needes sell other slaves to pay for her, which were both losse and shame unto me. wherefore i will suffer him to buy her; and when he setteth her to hire, i will be the first man that shall come unto her, and i will gather the floure of her virginitie, which shall stand mee in as great 'steade as if i had bought her. then the bawd payed the money, and tooke the maiden and departed home; and when he came into his house, he pericles.] painfull adventures. brought her into a certaine chappel, where stoode the idoll of priapus made of gold, and garnished with pearls and pretious stones. this idoll was made after the shape of a . man, with a mighty member unproportionable to the body, alwayes erected, whome bawds and leachers doe adore, mak- ing him their god, and worshipping him. before this filthy idoll he commaunded tharsia with reverence to fall downe. but she answered, god forbid, master, that i should wor- ship such an idoll. but (sir), said she, are you a lapsa- tenian why askeest thou ! said the bawd. i aske, quoth she, because the lapsatenians doe worship priapus: this spake she of simplicitie, not knowing what he was. ah, wretch! answered he, knowest thou not that thou arte come into the house of a covetous bawd ' when tharsia heard that, she fell downe at his feet and wept, saying: o master, take compassion upon my virginity, and do not hire out my body for so vile againe. the bawd answered: knowest thou not that neither bawd nor hangman do regard teares or prayers? then called he unto him a certaine villaine which was governour over his maids, and said unto him: let this maiden be decked in virgins apparell, pretious and costly, and write this title upon her, whosoever defloureth tharsia shal pay ten peeces of golde, and afterward she shall be com- mon unto the people for one peece at a time. the villaine fulfilled his masters commaundement, and the third day after that she was bought, shee was with great so- lemnitie conducted through the streete with musicke, the bawd himselfe with a great multitude going before, and so conveyed unto the brothell house. when shee was come thither, atha- anagoras, the prince, disguising his head and face because hee woulde not be knowen, came first in unto her; whome when tharsia sawe, she threw her selfe downe at his feete, and saide unto him : for the love of god, gentleman, take pitty on me! and by the name of god i adjure and charge you, that you do no violence unto me, but bridle your lust, and hearken unto my unhappye state, and consider diligently from whence the patterne of [pericles. i am sprung. my father was poore apollonius, prince of tyrus, whome force constrained to forsake his owne countrey. my mother was daughter to altistrates, king of pentapolis, who died in birth of me, poore wretch! upon the sea. my father also is dead, as was supposed, which caused dioni- siades, wife to stranguilio of tharsus, to whom my father committed me of special trust to be brought up, being but an infant, envying mine estate, and thirsting after my wealth, to seeke my death by the handes of a villaine; which had beene accomplished, and i would to god it had before i had seen this day, but that i was suddenly taken away by the pyrates which solde me unto this filthie bawd. with these or such like wordes declared shee her heavie fortune, eſtsoones sobbing and bursting out into streames of tears, that for ex- treme griefe she could scarsly speake. when she had in this manner uttered her sorow, the good prince, being astonied, and mooved with compassion, said unto her: be of good cheere, tharsia, for surely i rue thy case; and i myselfe have also a daughter at home, to whome i doubt that the like chances may befall. and when he had so said, he gave her twenty peeces of gold, saying: holde heere a greater price or reward for thy virginitie than thy master appointed; and say as much unto others that come unto thee as thou hast done to me, and thou shalt withstand them. then tharsia fell on her knees, and weeping saide unto him: sir, i give you most hartie thankes for your great compassion and curtesie, and most hartily i beseech you upon my knees, not to descry unto any that which i have saide unto you. no, surely, answered athanagoras, unlesse i tell it unto my daughter, that she may take heede when she commeth unto the like yeares, that she fall not into the like mishappe: and when he had so saide, he let fall a fewe teares, and departed. now, as he was going he met with another pilgrime that with like devotion came for to seeke the same saint, who demaunded of him howe hee liked of the maidens company. truly, answered athanagoras, [pericles. chap. xiiii. how tharsia withstoode a second assault of her virginitie, and by what meanes she was preserved. when night was come the master bawd used always to receive the money which his women had gotten by the use of their bodies the day before. and when it was demaunded of tharsia, she brought him the mony, as the price and hire of her virginitie. then said the bawd unto her: it is wel done, tharsia: use diligence henceforth, and see that you bring mee thus much mony every day. when the next day was past also, and the bawd understoode that she remained a virgin stil, he was offended, and called unto him the villaine that had charge over the maides, and said unto him: sirra, how chanceth it that tharsia remaineth a virgin still? take her unto thee, and spoile her of her maidenhead, or be sure thou shalt be whipped. then saide the villaine unto tharsia: tel me, art thou yet a virgin? she answered, i am, and shal be as long as god will suffer me. how then, said he, hast thou gotten all this mony ? she answered, with teares, falling downe upon her knees, i have declared mine estate, humbly requesting all men to take compassion on my vir- ginitie. and nowe likewise, falling then downe at his feete also, take pitty on me, good friend, which am a poore cap- tive, and the daughter of a king, and doe not defile me. the villaine answered: our master the bawd is very covetous and greedie of money, and therefore i see no meanes for thee to continue a virgin. whereunto tharsia replied: i am skilful in the liberal sciences, and well exercised in all studies, and no man singeth or playeth on instruments better than i: wherefore bring mee into the market place of the citie, that men may heare my cunning; or let the people pro- pound any maner of questions, and i will resolve them, and i doubt not but by this practise i shall get store of money the patterne of [pericles. master, and demaunded what it meant. the master aun- swered, we rejoyce, and be you glad also with us, my lorde, for this day we doe solemnize the feast of your birth. then apollonius sighed, and said himselfe: all keepe hollyday save i onely, and let it suffice unto my servants that i only remaine in sorrow and heavinesse: howbeit, i give unto them ten peeces of gold, to buy what they will to keepe holyday withall. but whosoever shall call me unto the feast, or goe about to provoke me unto mirth, i commaund that his thighes shall be broken. so the cater tooke the money, and went aland, and provided necessaries, and returned againe unto the ship. chap. xvi. how athanagoras, prince of machilenta, seeing the beautie of apollonius ship, went aboord of it, and did the best he could to comfort him. as fortune thereto served, and delight to take the fresh aire moved athanagoras, prince of the citie, to walk toward the sea side, he sawe apollonius ships riding at anker: at the view wherof he tooke great pleasure, especially at the admi- rall, which was a great ship, and a beautiful, wherin apollo- nius himself was carried, the like whereof haply he had not seene often before. this was that athanagoras that loved tharsia so tenderly; and he haled unto the marriners, and asked of whence that faire ship was! the marriners an- swered, that she came now from tharsus. truly, said atha- nagoras, it is a faire shippe, and well appointed, and of all that i have seene i like best of her. now, when the marri- ners heard their shippe so highly commended, they desired him to come aboord, whereunto he willingly graunted. and when he was come abord, he sate downe with them at meat, pericles.] pa infull adventures. and he drue his purse, and laid downe ten peeces of gold upon the table, saying, you shall not say that you have bidden an unthankfull person: take this small summe of money at my handes for a reward; and they thanked him. but when he was set downe, and beheld al that sate at the boord, hee demaunded who was owner of the ship, and where he was the maister answered, our owner is sicke, and weake with , sorrowe and taking thought, and needes will die. he lost his wife uppon the sea, and his daughter in a strange land. athanagoras said unto one of the servants called ardalius, i will give thee two peeces of gold, to go down and tell thy master that the prince of this citie desireth him to come up out of darknesse into light. the servaunt answered : i cannot buy new thighes for thy golde, and therefore get some man els to go on the errand, for he hath said that whosoever troubleth him, his thighes shall be broken. that law hath he made over you, said athanagoras, and not over mee, and therefore i will go downe unto him: but first tell me, i pray you, what you call his name they answered, apollonius: and when he heard that name, hee remembred in his minde that hee heard tharsia call her father so, and he went downe unto him where he lay, whom when hee beheld, having a long beard, and rough fligged haire, and long nailes on his fingers, he was somewhat astonied, and called unto him with a soft voice, saying: apollonius ! when apollonius heard himselfe named, thinking it had been some of his men that had called him, arose up sodainly with a fierce countenance, and seeing a stranger looking verie comely and honourably attired, he held his peace. then spake athanagoras: sir, i thinke you doe marvell, that i, being a stranger, am so bold as to come to trouble you. you shall understand that i am prince of this citie, and my name is athanagoras. i walked by chance unto the sea-side, where beholding thy ships, especially commending this wherin thou art, for beautie and strength, i was by thy men desired to come aboord, which i did, and have eaten with them. then s the patterne of [pericles. inquired i for the owner, and they told me thy name, and that thou remainest in great sorrow, and for that cause i am come downe unto thee to bring thee, if i may, out of dark- nesse into light, hoping that after this heavinesse god shal restore thee unto gladnesse. apollonius lifted up his eies, saying: i thanke thee, my lord, whosoever thou art, and i beseech thee not to trouble me longer, for i am not worthy to eate meat, or make good cheare, and i will live no longer. athanagoras much mused at this answere, and wondred at the wilfulnesse of the man, and came up uppon the decke and saide unto the servauntes: i cannot perswade your lord to come up out of that darke place into the light: what way therefore, were i best to devise to bring him from his purpose, and to preserve him from an obstinate death for it were great pitie that a notable gentleman should so consume away in hucker mucker, and die by a dishonourable death. chap. xvii. how athanagoras sent for tharsia to make her father apollonius merry; and how, after long cir- cumstance, they came into knowledge one of another. and as he was devising with himselfe, it came into his mind to send for the maiden tharsia, for which purpose he called unto him one of his men, and saide unto him : go unto the baud; desire him to send tharsia hither unto me, for she hath wisdom, and can move pleasant talke, and perhaps she may perswade him not to die thus wilfully. the messen- ger went speedily, and returned immediatly, bringing the maiden tharsia with him unto the ship. whom when athanagoras beheld, come hither unto me tharsia, quoth he, pericles.] painfull adventures, and shew now the uttermost of thy cunning and knowledge, in comforting the owner of the ship, which lieth in darknes and will receive no comfort, nor come abroad into the light, for the great sorrow that he taketh for his wife and his daughter. goe unto him, good tharsia, and prove if thou canst perswade him to come into the light; for it may be that god hath appointed by thy meanes to bring him from sorrowe into gladnesse. which thing if thou canst bring to . passe, as i am a gentleman, i will give thee thirtie sestercies of gold, and as many of silver, and i will redeeme thee from . the bawd for thirtie dayes. when tharsia heard this, she went boldly downe into the cabin unto him, and with a milde voice saluted him, saying, god save you, sir, whosoever you be, and be of good comfort, for an innocent virgin, whose life hath been distressed by shipwracke, and her chastitie by dishoneslie, and yet hath both preserved, saluteth thee. then began she to record in verses, and therewithall to sing so sweetly, that apollonius, notwithstanding his great sorrow, wondred at her. and these were the verses which she . soong so pleasantly unto the instrument:— - amongst the harlots foule i walke, yet harlot none am i: the rose amongst the thorns grows, and is not hurt thereby. the thiefe that stole me, sure i thinke, is slaine before this time: a bawd me bought, yet am i not defilde by fleshly crime. were nothing pleasanter to me, than parents mine to know : i am the issue of a king, my bloud from kings doth flow. i hope that god will mend my state, and send a better day. leave off your teares, plucke up your heart, and banish care a way. shew gladnesse in your countenance, cast up your cheerfull eyes : s the patterne of [pericles. that god remaines that once of nought created earth and skies. he will not let in care and thought you still to live, and all for nought. when apollonius heard her sing these verses, lifting up his eyes and sighing, he said: alas, poore wretch as i am! how long shall i strive with life, and abide this greevous con- flict? good maiden, i give hearty thanks both to your wise- dome and nobilitie, requiting you with this one thing, that whensoever, if ever such occasion doe chance, i shall have de- sire to be merrie, i will then thinke on you, or if ever i be restored unto my kingdome. and perhaps, as you say, you are descended of the race of kings, and indeed you doe well represent the nobilitie of your parentage. but nowe, i pray you, receive this reward at my handes, an hundred peeces of golde, and depart from me and trouble me no longer; for my present griefe is renued by your lamentable recitall, and i consume with continuall sorrowe. when the maid had re- ceived the reward, she was about to depart. then spake athanagoras: whither goest thou, tharsia, quoth heel hast thou taken paine without profite, and canst thou not worke a deed of charitie, and relieve the man that wil consume his life with mourning ! tharsia answered: i have done all that i may, and he hath given me an hundred peeces of gold, and desired me to depart. i wil give thee two hundred, said athanagoras, and goe downe unto him againe, and give him his money, and say unto him, i seeke thy health and not thy money. then went tharsia downe againe, and set her selfe downe by him, and saide unto him: sir, if you bee deter- mined to continue alwaies in this heavinesse, give mee leave, i pray you, to reason a little with you. and i meane to pro- pose certaine parables unto you, which if you can resolve, i will then depart, and restore your money. but apollonius, not willing to receive the money againe, but thankefully to accept whatsoever shee should utter, without discouraging of her, albeit in my troubles, quoth he, i have none other feli- citie but to weepe and lament, yet because i will not want the pericles.] painfull adventures. ornamentes of your wisdome, demaund of me whatsoever shall be your pleasure, and while i am aunswering you, par- don me, i pray you, if sometime i give libertie unto my teares, and shall not be able to speake for sobbing. sir, i wil beare with you somewhat in that respect said tharsia, and nowe if it please you i will begin : a certaine house on earth there is, that roomths hath large and wide: the house makes noise, the guests makes none, that therein doth abide ; but house and guest continually, togither forth doe slide. now, if indeed you be a prince, as your men say you are, it behooveth you to be wiser than a simple maiden, and to resolve my probleme. apollonius answered: maiden, to the intent you may not thinke you were tolde a lie, hearken now to the resolution. the house on the earth is the sea or every great water: the fish is the dumbe guest, which followeth the water whither soever it runne. sir, you have answered truely, said tharsia; and now i assaile you the second time: in length forth long i runne, faire daughter of the wood, accompanied with many a one, of foote and force as good, though many waies i walke, but steps appeare none where i stood. apollonius answered: if i might be so bold, and opportu- nitie served thereto, i could declare unto you many things that you doe not knowe, faire maiden; but not interrupting your questions whereunto i have to answere, wherein i much wonder at your yoong yeares, so plentifully fraught with excellent knowledge, but to come to the purpose: the daughter of the wood is the tree whereof is made the long ship, which is accompanied with many companions, and pericles.] painfull adventures. and take compassion uppon mee! i was borne among the waves and troublesome tempests of the sea. my mother died in pangues and paines of childbed, and buriall was denied her upon the earth, whom my father adorned with jewels, and laid twentie sestercies of gold at her head, and as much in silver at her feete, and inclosed her in a chest, and committed her to the sea. as for mee, unfortunate wretch, i was at tharsus committed to stranguilio and wicked dionisiades his wife, whom my father put in trust with me, with mony and princely furniture, and their servants were commanded to slay me. and when i desired time to pray, which was granted me, there came pyrates in the meane while, and carried me away, and brought me unto this wofull city, where i was solde to a most cruell bawd, and with much adoe have preserved my virginitie; and i see nothing ensu- ing but continuall sorrowe, whereof i feele both nowe and every day some part, and shall doe ever more and more, until it please god to restore me unto my father apollonius. apollonius gave good eare unto her words, and was strange- ly moved within himselfe, knowing that all these signes and tokens were most certaine that she was his daughter, and hee cried out with a mighty voice and saide: o mercifull god, which beholdest heaven, earth, and hell, and discoverest all the secretes therein, blessed bee thy most holy name for ever! and when he had said those words, he fell upon his daughter tharsias hecke, and kissed her, and for extreame joy wept bit- terly, saying: o my most sweete and onely daughter, the halſe part of my life, for the love of thee ilust not nowe to die, for i have found thee for whome i had desire to die onely. and therewithall he cryed out aloude, saying: come hither my ser- vants and frends, come ye al hither, and see now the end of all my sorrow, for i have found my deare daughter and onelie childe which i had lost. when the servants heard the noise, they came hastily togither, and with them prince athanagoras; and when they came downe under the hatches, they found apol- lonius weeping for joy, and leaning upon his daughters the patterne of [pericles. shoulders, and he said unto them: behold here my daughter, for whom i have mourned; beholde the one halfe of my life, for whose sake i nowe desire to live. and they al rejoyced and wept with him for company, and thanked god for that happy day. chap. xviii. howe apollonius, leaving off mourning, came into the citie machilenta, where he commaunded the bawd to be burned; and how tharsia was mar- ried unto prince athanagoras. tharsia, hearing her fathers words, fell down at his feet and kissed him, saying, o father, blessed be god that hath given me the grace to see you, and that i may die with you! but apollonius liſted up his heart, and cast away his mourning apparell, and put on other sweet and cleane raiment. and when athanagoras and the servants looked earnestly upon him, and upon his daughter, they wondred, saying, o my lord apollonius, how like in countenance is your daughter tharsia unto you ! that, if you had no other argument, this were sufficient proofe to shewe that she is your childe. apollonius thanked them, saying, that now he stoode not in any doubt thereof. then tharsia beganne to discourse unto her father, howe she was sold unto the bawd, and howe hee thrust her into the common brothell, and by what meanes she alwayes preserved her chastitie, and howe much she was bounden unto good prince athana- goras, there present. now, athanagoras was a widower, and a lusty yoong gentleman, and prince of the citie, as it is declared; who, fearing lest tharsia should be bestowed in marriage upon some other man, and using the benefite of the time, cast him selfe downe at apollonius feete, and besought pericles.] painfull adventures. him for her, saying, most noble prince, i beseech you for the living gods sake, which hath thus myraculously restored the father unto his daughter, bestowe not your daughter upon any other in marriage then me onely. i am prince of this citie, and through my meanes she hath continued a virgin, and by my procurement she is nowe come unto the knowledge of thee her father. apollonius courteously embracing him, answered : i thanke you most heartily, good prince athana- goras, for your friendly offer, which i may in no wise gain- say, both in respect of your owne woorthinesse and for the pleasure which you have shewed my daughter, and, there- fore you have my good will to be her husband. then, turning his face towards tharsia, how say you, my deare daughter? said he: are you contented to bee wife unto athanagoras? tharsia, with blushing cheeks, answered : yea forsooth, father; for since i came from stranguilioes house, i never found rest nor pleasure saving through his alonely curtesie. nowe, whether athanagoras rejoyced at this answere or not, i referre me to the judgement of those, who, being passionate with the same affection, would be well pleased with a joyntly grant of the like good wil. when these matters were thus concluded, apollonius mooved athanagoras concerning re- venge to be executed uppon the bawd. then athanagoras tooke his leave for awhile of apollonius, and departeth unto the citie, and, calling al the citizens togither to the market place, he spake thus unto them. my friends, and welbeloved. citizens, understand ye that apollonius, prince of tyrus, and father unto tharsia, is arrived in our coast with a great fleete of ships, wherein hee hath brought a mighty army of men to destroy our city for the bawds sake, who placed his daughter in a common brothell, to hire out the use of her body for monie. wherefore looke unto your selves, and advise your selves what you were best to doe, for it were pittie that the whole citie should perish for one wicked mans sake. when, as hee had made an ende of this speech, the whole the patterne of [pericles. multitude trembled and was sore afraide, and foorthwith de- termined that they would all, as well men, women, and children, goe foorth to see prince apollonius, and to crave pardon of him. not so, said athanagoras, but we will de- sire him to come peaceablie into our citie, and what he list to commaund shall be fulfilled. the people liked well of that counsel, and committed the matter unto his discretion wholly to provide for their safetie. then went he foorth unto apollonius, and desired him, in the peoples name, to come into the citie, where he should be most heartily wel- come. apollonius refused not that friendly offer, but imme- diately prepared himselfe to goe with him; and caused his head to be polled, and his beard to be trimmed, and his nailes to be pared, and put on a princely robe upon his backe, and a crowne of golde upon his head, and so passed foorth togither upon the way. and when they were come into the citie, the citizens sa- luted apollonius, and hee was placed in the highest seate whence the prince was wont to give judgement, and his daughter tharsia by his side, and he spake unto the people in this manner following: good people of the city of ma- chilenta, you see the virgine tharsia, whome i, her father, have found out this present day: hir hath the most filthie bawd, as much as in him lay, constrained to dishonest her body, to her utter destruction. from which his devillish purpose no intreatie could persuade him, no price could allure him. wherfore, my request unto you (good people) is, that i may have due revenge on him for the injury done unto my daughter. when the people heard his rea- sonable demaund, they cried out with one accord, saying: my lorde apollonius, we judge that he be burned alive, and his goods be given unto the maiden tharsia. the re- venge pleased apollonius well, and forthwith they appre- hended the bawd, and bound him hand and foot; and they made a great fire, and at apollonius commaundement cast him alive into it, and burnt him to ashes. then called pericles.] painfull adventures. tharsia for the villaine, and saide unto him: because by thy meanes, and all the citizens, i have hitherto remained a virgine even untill my fathers comming, my will is that thou be free; and, moreover, here i give unto thee two hundred peeces of gold for a reward. secondly, she called for all the women that were in the bawdes brothell, and saide unto them : good women, whose chances, perhaps, hath beene as greevous unto you as mine was unto me, i set you al at liberty; and whereas heretofore you have gained money by hiring foorth the use of your bodies, receive of mee here this rewarde, that you may live hereafter more in the feare of god, and practise some more commendable way to sus- taine necessitie: and therewithall she gave to everie one of them a rewarde, and so dismissed them. and when all these things were ended, apollonius, minding to depart, spake unto the people, saying: noble prince athanagoras, and beloved citizens of machilenta, i acknowledge my selfe much bounden to you, and i yeeld you hearty thanks for all your benefites bestowed uppon me and my daughter. and now, in recompence thereof, i give unto you fifty poundes weight of golde to be divided amongest you, that, when i am gone from you, you may be mindefull of me. the citizens thanked him, and bowed their heads in token of reverence; and they agreed together, and they erected two statues of brasse, one unto him, another to his daughter, in the market place of the citie, with these superscriptions written in their bases: unto apollonius, prince of tyrus, the preserver of our houses; and unto his vertuous daughter tharsia, a virgin, the mindefull citizens of machilenta have erected those monuments. but apollonius, remembring the great curtesie of athanagoras, and his promise made unto him concerning tharsia, appointed a short time for their mariage, against which there was great provision as might be at so smal warning. the solemnities, riches, braverie, cost, feasts, revelles, intertainement, and all things else appertain- ing thereunto, and requisite for so great personages, i shall pericles.] painfull adventures. an angell to turne my course unto ephesus; and there in the temple to declare aloud al my adventures that had befallen me, since my youth unto this present day, which hath hitherto guided me in all my troubles, will nowe send an happy end unto all mine afflictions. chap. xx. how apollonius came to the knowledge of his wife, the ladie lucina; and how they rejoyced at the meeting of ech other. the ladie lucina was not so busie in executing her office in the church, but that she gave also attentive eare unto her lord apollonius talke, whom at the first she knew not. but when shee heard the long discourse, whereby she knewe by all signes that hee was her husband, and shee was his wife, her heart burned within her, and she could scarce temper her affections untill hee had done talking. yet measuring her love with modestie, as nowe of long time having learned the true trade of pacience, shee gave him libertie to make an end, which done, shee ran hastily unto him, and embraced him hard in her armes, and woulde have kissed him. which thing, when apollonius sawe, hee was mooved with disdaine, and thrust her from him, as misliking such lightnesse in her, whose modestie and good grace hee had so lately before com- mended in his heart, and nothing at all suspecting that she had been his wife. then shee, pouring foorth teares aboun- dantly, o, my lord apollonius, said she, the one halfe of my life, why deale you thus ungently with me ! i am your wife, daughter unto altistrates, king of pentapolis, and my name is lucina. and you are apollonius, prince of tyrus, my lord and deare husband, and you are my schoolemaister, which taught mee musicke: and moreover you are the sea- the patterne of [pericles. wrecked man whom i especially loved above many, not for concupiscence sake, but for desire of wisedome. when apollonius heard these words, he was sodainly astonied; and as the strangenes of the chance appalled him much, so the great joy revived his spirites againe, and he cast his eies earnestly uppon her, and immediatly called her to remem- brance, and knewe her, and fell uppon her necke, and for exceeding joy brast out into teares; and then, lifting up his handes and eyes to heaven, hee saide : blessed be the moste mightie god of heaven, which sitteth above and beholdeth the state of men on earth, and dealeth with them according to his great mercie; who nowe also of his unspeakeable goodnesse hath restored unto mee my wife and my daughter. then did hee most lovingly embrace and kisse his ladie, whom he supposed long before to be dead; and shee like- wise requited him with the like fruites of good will and courtesie, whom she surely thought she should never have seene againe. and when they had continued a good space in intertaining the one another, o, my moste deare lord apollonius, saide the lady lucina, where is my childe whereof i was delivered apollonius aunswered: my best beloved ladie, it was a daughter, and she was named tharsia, and this is she and there withal he shewed her tharsia. then kissed and embraced she her daughter, and likewise her sonne in law athanagoras, and they greatly rejoyced one in another. and when report heereof was spread abroad, there was great joy throughout all the citie of ephesus; and the report has blowen about in everie place, how prince apollonius had found out his ladie and wife among the nunnes in the temple. then lucina discoursed unto her lord and husband, apollonius, of the strange accidents that happened unto her after his casting her forth into the sea; namely, howe her chest was cast on land at the coast of ephesus, and taken up by a phisition; and how she was revived and by him adopted, and, for preservation of her honestie, placed among the nunnes in the temple of diana, pericles.] painfull adventures. where hee then found her, accordingly as it appeareth before in the historie; wherefore they blessed the name of god, and yeelded most heartie thankes unto him, that hee had pre- served them hitherto, and graunted them so joyfull a meeting. chap. xxi. how apollonius departed from ephesus, and sailed himselfe, his wife, his sonne, and daughter, unto antiochia, and then to tyrus, and from thence to tharsus, where he revenged himselfe upon stran- guilio and dionisiades. apollonius and lucina his wife, and the residue of their traine, having rested themselves and made merrie sufficient time at ephesus, when the winde served, tooke leave of their friendes, and went aboord of their ships, and lanched from the shore, and departed unto antiochia; where, according as calamitus, the maister of the ship of tyrus, had tolde him before, the kingdome was reserved for him since the death of antiochus. but when the citizens heard that he was arrived, they were all exceeding glad, and put on their bravest apparell, and garlandes of bayes upon their heads, and went forth in procession to meet him, and brought him in triumph into the citie, and crowned him king with all joy and gladnesse. and when all the solemnities of the corona- tion, the feastes, triumphes, largesses, and pardons, were finished, hee abode with them certaine daies to dispose some matters in order that required redresse, and to establish certaine lawes for the due administration of justice. which being all accomplished according to his desire, he tooke his leave of the citizens, and with his wife, sonne, and daughter, departed to the sea, and sayled unto tyrus, his owne native t pericles.] painfull adventures departed this life. and as for hir grave, you have seene it, and also the monument of brasse erected by the whole citie in the memoriall of her, and, moreover, you have read the superscription. then apollonius commaunded his daughter to stand foorth in the presence of them all; and shee saide unto dionisiades: beholde, thou wicked woman, dead tharsia is come to greete thee, who, as thou diddest well hope, shoulde never have been forth comming to have bewrayed thy wick- ednesse. but when the miserable woman beheld tharsia, her heart quaked for feare, and shee fell to the ground in a swoond; and when shee recovered againe, shee cried out up- pon the just judgement of god, and cursed the time that shee was borne. and all the people ranne thronging about thar- sia, and wondered at her, thinking howe greatly they had been of long time abused by stranguilio and dionisiades; and they rejoyced much in her safetie, and all knewe by her coun- tenance that it was shee, and none other. o, now, who were able to declare the bitter griefe and intol- lerable care which eftsoones assaied the wearisome consciences of these twaine, the husband and the wife, when they sawe her living and in good liking before their faces, whose death they had so traiterously conspired? even hell it selfe is not comparable unto so heavie a burden, the unspeakable weight whereof all men ought to feare, and none can sufficiently de- scribe unlesse hee have been semblably plunged in the like gulfe of horrible desperation. then tharsia called for theo- philus, stranguilios villaine, and when he was come into her presence, shee saide unto him: theophilus, aunswere mee aloud, that all the people may heare, who sent thee forth to slay me! hee aunswered, dionisiades, my mistresse. what mooved her thereunto saide tharsia. none other thing, i suppose, saide the villaine, but to enjoy the money and orna- mentes, and also because thy beautie and comelinesse were commended above philomacias, her daughters. nowe, when the people heard this, they ranne uppon stranguilio and dioni- siades, and tooke them violently, and bound them, and drew the patterne of [pericles. time (god knowes) in smaller causes than at the death of husband, father, or mother. but as al things have their time, so have sorrowe and teares also, which are best dried up with the towell of continuance; which gave nowe just occa- sion unto apollonius to cast off drowsie sorrowe, and to pro- vide for the funeralles of his father-in-lawe, which he accom- plished with so seasonable expedition, and in so honourable a sort, as was seemely for so mighty a king and so vertuous a prince, whome hee buried among the auntient race of kings, his auncestours, in the temple within the citie of pentapolis. which beeng all finished, as it is also a worke of charitie to fulfill the will of the dead, he applied himselfe to execute his fathers testament, wherin he had given halfe his kingdome unto apollonius, and the other halfe to tharsia his neece, to have and to holde to them and to their heires for ever. chap. xxiii. how apollonius rewarded the fisherman that re- leeved him after hee had suffered shipwracke: howe hee dealt also with olde calamitus, and likewise with the pyrates that stole away tharsia. by this time, when all cares were banished, and apollonius injoyed his kingdome in quiet possession, he gave himselfe sometimes to delight, as other princes are wont to do. and it fortuned that on a day when he had dined, he walked foorth for recreation unto the sea side, with his wife and a fewe servants. and when hee came there, he sawe a small fisher boat fleeting under saile, which hee thought by all signes he should knowe well; for hee supposed it to be the fish- ermans boat which succoured him when he had suffered ship- al introduction. the hero, at the oldest date at which we hear of him in eng- lish, was called “kynge appolyn of thyre:" in , under this title, wynkyn de worde printed the romance, as it had been translated from the french by robert copland. this was its first appearance in our printed literature. who was the anthor of the french version used by copland we are without information; but it is more than probable that the foundation of it was the narrative in the gesta romanorum (printed late in the th century), to which belleforest was also to a certain extent indebted in his histoires, tragiques, the pub- lication of which was commenced in . belleforest, how- ever, claims to have gone to a distinct source, a manuscript having fallen in his way, which purported to be tiré du grec: in fact, it seems to have had its origin in that language, from which it was translated into latin, and subsequently into french, spanish, italian, and english. these different ver- sions are enumerated by mr. douce in the work we have al- ready referred to, but the anglo-saxon translation (not long since printed under the learned care of mr. thorpe) does not seem to have fallen in his way. latin mss. of it, as early as the tenth century, appear to be in existence. the prose romance, which occupies the principal part of the succeeding pages, was first published in , and how soon afterwards it was adapted to the stage in london can- not be decided. it professed originally to be “gathered into english" by lawrence twine, and it is singular that malone, steevens, and even douce, fell into the error of attributing the translation to thomas twine, “the continu- ator of phaer's virgil." lawrence twine was brother to thomas twine, and both were sons of john twine, lawrence being the eldest, and, as anthony wood says, “a fellow of all souls college, bachelor of civil law, and an ingenious poet of his time” (ath. oxon. vol. i., , edit. bliss). he left nothing behind him in verse, as far as we now know, but certain commendatory lines to books by his friends, and the song and riddles of tharsia hereafter inserted. how fre- introduction. iii quently, and at what intervals, lawrence twine's “patterne of painefull adventures, containing the most excellent, plea- sant, and variable historie, &c. of prince apollonius of tyre", was reprinted after , we have no exact informa- tion; but a new edition of it came out in , the very year before the play of “pericles,” as adapted to the stage by shakespeare, would seem to have been acted. our re-pub- lication of the romance is from an edition hitherto unknown, without date, but, as we may judge from the type and other circumstances, published before the opening of the seven- teenth century. the grounds for our opinion, that shakespeare's “peri- cles,” (as far as he may lay claim to its authorship) was first acted early in the year , are stated in detail in “farther particulars regarding shaskespeare and his works,” vo, . as only fifty copies of that tract were printed, it may be necessary to add here, that a narrative entitled “the painfull adventures of pericles, prince of tyre,” was pub- lished in , purporting to be “the true history of the play of pericles, as it was lately presented by the worthy and ancient poet john gower.” this “history” is derived directly from the play, as the play had been derived mainly from twine's translation of “prince apollonius, of tyre;” and it was printed in consequence of the great success that at- tended the performance of “pericles,” when it was brought out with shakespeare's additions and improvements. at the time the “farther particulars regarding shakespeare and his works” were collected and composed, the author was not aware of the evidence preserved in dulwich college, and re-. cently inserted in the “memoirs of edward alleyn,” of the existence of an earlier drama upon the same story, and under the same title as what we have been accustomed to call shakespeare's “pericles.” those who are in possession of the “farther particulars,” &c. will see that the author traces and compares, in curious detail, the parallel passages in the play and in the “history" founded upon it; and he may be iv introduction. said to have gone the length of establishing that certain ex- pressions, and even lines, originally recited by the players, have been omitted in the impression of “pericles,” as it has reached us. the reason why shakespeare, or his predecessor, introduced “ancient gower" to open the drama, and to deliver certain in- terlocutions in the course of it, will be sufficiently obvious to those who are aware that gower makes the whole story part of his confessio amantis ; a work full of variety and beauty, to which due justice has, perhaps, never been done, in conse- quence of the comparison which must be drawn between gower, as a poet, and his greater contemporary chaucer. lid- gate has laboured, in a degree, under the same disadvantage; but the publication last year of some of his “minor poems,” by the percy society, will tend to elevate him in the scale of our early poets. the confessio amantis was three times printed prior to the reign of elizabeth, viz. by caxton in , and by berthelet in and . we have appended gower's versified history of “appollinus, the prince of tyr” to our reprint of twine's prose version of the romance, because it is pretty evident, from particular ex- pressions, that shakespeare, or his dramatic precursor (al- ways supposing two separate writers to have been engaged on the subject) had reference to it when composing the play of “ pericles.” malone inferred this fact also from the circumstance that pericles is called “prince of tyre” in the play, and in gower's version, whereas, in copland's transla- tion, he is called “ring of tyre;” but the commentator omitted to remark that prince de thyr are the words of a french translation by corozet in ; and that the hero is spoken of as “prince apollonius” in twine's “patterne of painefull adventures,” which the play more immediately follows. our readers will be enabled to judge from what succeeds of the precise degree of obligation to the one or to the other. - for our text of gower's poetical narrative we have not re- introduction. v sorted to either of the three printed copies of the confessio amantis: we were anxious to give the story, with as much fidelity as possible, in the words of the old poet, and for this reason we have gone to a fine and nearly contemporary ms. upon vellum preserved in the british museum (harl. )*, corrected by another ms. in the same library (harl. ). it will be found, that the variations between this ms. and the printed copies are chiefly verbal, excepting in one or two instances, where a line has been omitted in the one or in the other: the divisions of the poem, with the latin headings, are differently arranged. generally speaking, the ms. has the advantage of the printed copies; but such is not always the case, as on p. , l. , where, in the ms., theophilus is designated “a fals clerke,” instead of “a fals cherle,” as it properly stands in the first edition by berthelet. we are not aware that it is necessary to say more by way of introduction to what follows, than to add that gower avowedly adopted his incidents from a metrical version in the pantheon, or universal chronicle of godfrey of viterbo, which was compiled at the latter end of the twelfth century, though not printed until . “of a cronique in daies gone, the wich is cleped panteon, in loves cause i rede thus," are gower's introductory lines; and he subsequently more than once refers to “the booke” to which he was indebted, much in the same way that ariosto professes his obligations to the narrative by bishop turpin, respecting the conquests of charlemaine and the atchievements of orlando. on one * for the following description of this ms. we are indebted to the kindness of j. holmes, esq. :—“at the foot of some of the pages are emblazoned various coats of arms, being those of reade, james, handlo, borstall, st. amand, de la pole, cottesmore, &c. in all pro- bability, therefore, the ms. belonged to (if indeed it were not written for him) sir william reade of borstall, co. bucks, living temp. henry vii. all the above were quartered by him." vi introduction. occasion, when gower breaks off from one part of his story in order to return to another, he opens a chapter as follows (p. ):- “bot nowe to my matere ayen, to telle as olde bokes seyne;" as if he had consulted more than one authority; but it is very evident that he had looked no farther than the work, the title of which we have already given, the pantheon of godfrey of viterbo. appollinus, the prince of tyr. * hic loduitur adhuc contra incestuosos amantum coitus; et narrat mi- rabile exemplum de magno rege antiocho, qui, uxore mortua, pro- priam filiam violavit, et quia filiae matrimonium penes alios impedire voluit, tale abeo exiit edictum, quod si quis eam in uxorem peteret, nisi quoddam problema questionis, quam ipse rex proposuerat, veraciter solveret, capitali sententia puniretur. super quo veniens tandem discretus juvenis, princeps tyri, appollinus, questionem solvit. nectamen filiam habere potuit, sed rex indignatus ipsum propter hoc in mortis odium recollegit. unde appollinus a facie regis fugiens quam plura, prout inferius intitulantur, propter amorem pericula passus est. * of a cronique in daies gon, the wich is cleped panteon, in loves cause i rede thus: howe that the grete antiochus, of whome that antioche tooke his ferst name, as seith the booke, was cowpled to a noble quene, and hadde a douhter hem by twene. bot such fortune came to honde, that deth, wich no kynde may withstonde, bot every liff it mote obeye, this worthi queene tooke aweye. the kynge wich made mochel moone, tho stode, as who seith, alle hym oone with oute wif: but natheles his douhter, wich was pereles of beaute, dwelte aboute hym stille: bot whan a man hath welthe at wille the flessh is frele, and falleth ofte; and that this maide, tendre and softe, wich in here faders chamber dwelte, within a tyme wiste and felte : for likyng of concupiscence, with oute insiht of conscience, x appollinus, the the fader so with lustes blente, that he caste alle his hole entente his owhne douhter for to spille. the kyng hath leyser att his wille, with strength, and whan he tyme seyhe, this yonge maidenn he forleyhe. and she was tendre and fulle of drede, she couthe not here maydenhede defende, and thus she hath for lore the floure wich she hath longe bore. it helpeth nouht alle thouh she wepe, for thei that sholde here body kepe of wommen were absent as thanne; and thus this maiden goth to manne. the wilde fader thus devoureth his owne flessh, wich non socoureth, and that was cause of mochel care. bot after this unkynde fare oute of the chamber goth the kyng, and she lay stille, and of this thyng within here selfe suche sorowe made, there was nouht that myht here glade, for fere of thilke horrible vice. with that came inne the norice, wich fro childhode here hadde kepte, and axeth if she hadde slepte, and with here chere was ungladde? bot she, wich haith ben over ladde of that she myht not be wreke, for shame couthe unethes speke : and natheles mercy she preide with wepynge ihe, and thus she seide:— helas, my suster, wayloway, that evere i sihe this ilke daye thyng, wich my body first be gate in to this worlde, only that prince of tyr. my worldes worshippe hath byreſte. with that she swoneth nowe and efte, and ever wissheth aftir the deth, so that welle nyhe hire lakketh breth. that othir, wich here worde herde, in confortyng of here answerde : to lette here faders foule desire she wiste noon recoverire. whan thinge is do, ther is no bote; , so suffren thei that suffren mote : ther was non othir wich it wiste. thus hath this kynge alle that hym liste of his likyng and his pleasauns, and laste in suche continuauns, and such delite he tooke ther inne, hym thouht that it was no synne, and she dorste hym no thinge withseye. bot fame, wich goth every weye to sundry regnes alle abowte, the grete beaute telleth oute of such a maide of hihe parage; so that, for love of mariage, the worthie princes come and sende, as thei the wiche alle honoure wende, and knewe no thinge howe that it stode. the fader, whanne he understode that thei his douhter thus bysouhte, with alle his wit he caste and souhte howe that he myht fynde a lette; and thus a statute than he sette, and in this wise his lawe he taxeth— that what man that his douhter axeth, but if he couth his questionn assoile, uponne suggestion of certen thinges that bifelle, the wich he wolde unto hym telle, x appollinus, the he sholde in certeyn lese his hede. and thus ther were many dede, here hedes stondyng on the gate, tille atte laste, longe and late, for lakke of answere in the wise, the remenaunt, that weren wise, escheweden to make assaie. * de adventu appollini in antiochiam, ubi ipse filiam regis antiochi in uxorem postulavit. tille it befelle upon a daie, appollinus, the prince of tyr, wich hath to love a grete desire, as he wich in his hihe mode was likyng of his hote blode, a yonge, a fressh, a lusty knyht, as he laye musynge on a nyht of the tidynges wich he herde, he thouht assaie howe that it ferde. he was with worthie compaignie araide, and with gode navie to shipp he goth; the wynde him dryveth, and saileth, tille that he ary veth saf in the porte of antioche. he londeth, and goth to aproche the kinges courte of his presence. of every naturel science, whiche eny clerke couth hym teche, he couthe inouh; and in his speche of wordes he was eloquent. and whan he sihe the kyng present he prayeth he moste his douhter have. the kynge a yen beganne to crave and tolde hym the condicionn, howe ferste unto his question prince of tyr. he mote answere, and faile nouht, or with his hedde it shal be bouht; and he him axeth, what it was. * questio regis antiochi: scelere vehor, materna carne vescor, quero patrem meum, matris meat virum, uxoris meae filium. " the kyng declareth hym the cas with sterne loke, and sturdy chere, to hym and seide in this manere: with felonie i am up bore, i ete, and have it nouht forbore, my moders flessh, whos husbonde my fader for to seche i fonde, wich is the sone of my wife. herof i am inquisitiff, and who that can my tale save, alle quyte he shalle my douhter have of his answere ; and if he faile he shal be dede with oute faile. for thie, my sone, quod the kyng, be welle avised of this thyng which hath thy liff in jupartie. responsio appollini. appollinus for his partie, whan he this questionn hath herde, unto the kyng he hath answerde, and hath rehersed oon and oon the poyntez, and seide theruppon. the questionn wich thou hast spoke, if thou wolt that it be unloke, it toucheth alle the pryvete bytwene thyn owne childe and the, and stant al hoole upponn yowe two. indignatio regis antiochi super responsione appollini. the kyng was wonder sory tho, appollinus, the and thouht, if that he seide it oute, than were he shamed alle aboute. with slie wordes and with felle, he seith : my sone i shalle the telle, thouh that thou be of litel wit, it is no grete merveile as yit, thynn age may it nouht suffice; bot loke welle thou nouht dispice thyn owne liff, for of my grace . of thritty dayes fulle a space i graunt the to ben avised. * de recessu appolini ab antioch. and thus, with leve and tyme assised, this yonge prince forthe he wente, and understode welle what he mente, within his herte, as he was lered ; that for to make him affered the king his tyme hath so delaied. wherof he dradde, and was amayed of treson that he deye sholde, for he the kyng his soth tolde: and sodenly the nyhtes tide, that more wolde he nott abide, alle prively his barge he hente, and home ayen to tyr he wente. and in his owne wit he seide, for drede if he the kynge bewreide, he knewe so welle the kynges herte, that deth ne sholde he not asterte, the kyng hym wolde so pursue. bot he that wolde his deth eschewe, and knew alle this to fore the honde, forsake he thouht his owne londe, that there wolde he not abide; for welle he knewe that on som side prince of tyr. howe that the prynce of tyre is fled, so was he come a yen unsped. the kynge was sory for a while, bot whan he seyh, that with no wile he myght a cheve his crualte, he stynte his wrath, and lete hym be. * qualiter appollinus in portu tharsis applicuit, ubi in hospitio cu- jusdam magni viri, nomine stranguilionis, hospitatus est. * bot over this nowe for to telle of aventures, that byfelle unto this prince of whome y tolde. he hath his riht cours forth holde by stoon and nedle, tille he came to tharse, and ther his londe he name. a burgeys rich of golde and fee was thilke tyme in that cite, wich cleped was stranguilio, his wiff was dionise also. this yonge prince, as seith the booke, with hym his herbergage toke; and it be felle that cite so, by fore tyme and thanne also, thurh stronge famyne, wich hem ladde, was none that eny whete hadde. appollinus, whan that he herde the myschef howe the cite ferde, alle frelych of his owne yifte, his whete a monge hem for to shifte, the wich be shippe he hadde brouht, he yaff, and tooke of hem riht nouht. bot sithen ferst the worlde be ganne, was never yit to such a man more joye made, than they hym made; for they were alle of hym so gladde, ° appollin us, the that they for ever in remembraunce made a figure in resemblaunce of hym, and in comonne place they sett it upp; so that his face miht every maner man by holde, so that the cite was by holde. it was of latonn over gilte; thus hath he not his yifte spilte. ºr qualiter helycanus, civis tyri, tharsim veniens, appollinum de insidiis antiochi praemunivit. * uppon a tyme with a route this lorde to pley goth hym oute, and in his weye of tyr he mette a man, wich on kneys hym grette, and helican by name he hihte; whiche preide his lorde to have in sihte upponn hym self, and saide hym thus: howe that the grete antiochus a waiteth, if that he myht hym spille. that othir thouht, and helde him stille, and thonked hym of his warnyng, and badde hym telle for no tidyng, whan he to tyr came home ayenn, that he in tharse hym had seynn. * qualiter appollinus portum tharsis relinquens, cum ipse per mare navigio securiorem requisivit, superveniente tempestate, navis cum omnibus, praeter ipsum solum, in eadem contentis, juxta penta- polim periclitabatur. "i fortune hath ever be muable, and may no while stonde stable; for nowe hit hiheth, nowe it loweth, nowe stante upriht, now overthroweth, prince of tyr. nowe fulle of blis, nowe fulle of bale, for as in tellyng of my tale here aftirwarde a man may lere, wich is grete routh for to here. t this lorde, wich wold don his beste, withinn hym self hath litel reste, and thouhte he wolde his place chaunge, and seche a contre more strange. of tharsiens his leve anon he toke, and is to shippe gon. his cours he name with seile updrawe where as fortune doth the lawe, and sheweth, as i shal reherse, howe she was to this lorde dyvers, the whiche upponn the see she ferketh. the wynde aros, the weder derketh, it blewe, and made such tempeste, noon anker may the shippe areste, wich hath to broken alle his gere. the shippmen stode in such a fere, was noon that myht hym selfe by stere, bot ever a wayte uppon the lere whan that thei sholde drynche at ones. there was inouh with inne wones of wepyng, and of sorowe tho. this yonge kyng maketh mochel wo so for to see the shippe travaile; bot alle that myht hym not availe. the maste to brake, the saile to roff, the shippe upponn the wawes droff, tille that they sihe a londes coste. tho made a vowe, the leest and moste, by so thei myht come to a londe. bot he wich hath the see on honde, neptunus, wolde nouht acorde, bot alle to brake cable and corde prince of tyr. if nyh were eny towne for hym he seide, ye, pentapolym, where bothe kynge and qwene dwellenn. whan he this tale herde tellen he gladeth hym, an gan byseche that he the wey hym wolde teche: and he hym tauht, and forth he wente, and preide god with goode entente to sende hym joye aftir his sorwe. it was not yit passed myddemorowe. * qualiter appollino pentapolim adveniente, ludus gymnasii per urbem publice proclamatus est. " than the derwarde his wey he name, where soone uponn the none he came. he ete such as he myht gete, and forth a non whan he hadde ete he goth to se the towne a boute; and came there as he fonde a route of yonge lusty men with alle, and as it shude tho by falle, that day was sette of such assise, that theisholde in the londes gyse, as he herde of the people seye, the comonne game thanne pleye : and cryed was, that theisholde come unto the game, alle and some of hem that ben delyvere and wiht, to do suche maistrye as thei myht. thei made hem naked as thei sholde, for so that ilke game wolde, and it was the custume and us, amonges hem was no refus. the floure of alle the towne was there, and of the courte also ther were, appollin us, the and that was in a large place, riht evene afore the kynges face, wich arcestrates hiht. the pley was pleide riht in his siht; and who moste worthi was of dede recey've he sholde a certeyn mede, and in the cite bere a prys. appollinus, wich war and wys of every game couthe an ende he thouht assay, how so it wende, * qualiter appollinus ludum gymnasii vincens, in aula regis ad coenam honorifice receptus est. and felle amonge hem in to game; and there he wan hym such a name so as the kynge hym self accompteth, • that he alle othir men surmounteth, and bar the prys above hem alle. the kynge bade that in to his halle at souper tyme he shalle be brouht, and he came than, and lefte it nouht with oute compaignie alone. was none so semely of persone, of visage, and of lymes bothe, if that he hadde what to clothe. at souper tyme natheles, the kyng a myddes alle the pres lete clepe him uppe amonge hem alle, and bade his marchall of his halle to setten hym in such degre that he uppon hym myht se. the kyng was sone sett and served, and he wich hath his prys deserved, aftir the kynges owne worde, was made by gynne a myddel borde, prince of tyr. whan that it was of hir opposed, with inne here herte hath welle supposed that he is of grete gentilesse: his dedes been therof wittenesse, forth with the wisdome of his lore it nedith not to sechen more. he myht not have such manere of gentile blode bot if he were. when he hath harped alle his fille the kynges heste to fulfille, awey goth dissh, away goth cuppe, downe goth the borde, the cloth was uppe, they rysen, and gon oute of halle. the kynge his chamberleynn lete calle, and bade that he by alle weye a chambre for this man purveye, whiche nyh his owne chambre be. it shall be do, my lorde, quod he. * qualitur appollinus cum rege pro filia sua erudienda retentus est. appollinus, of whome i mene, tho toke his leve of kyng and qweene, and of the worthi maide also, wich preide unto hire fader tho, that she myht of the yonge man of the science, wich he can, his lore have. and in this wys the kynge here graunteth his apprise, so that hym self therto assent. thus was accorded er they wente, that he with alle that ever he may, this yonge faire fressh may of that he couth sholde enforme. and fulle assented in this forme, thei token leve as for that nyht, y appollinus, the t qualiter filia regis appollinum ornato apparatu vestiri fecit. et ipse ad puellae doctrinam in quam pluribus familiariter intendebat, unde placata, puella in amorem appollini exardescens infirmabatur. " and whan it was a morowe liht, unto this yonge man of tyr of clothes and of good a tyr, with golde and silver to despende, this worthi yonge ladye sende: and thus she made hym welle attease, and he, with alle that he can please, her serveth welle and faire ayeyn. he tauht hire til she was certeyn of harpe, of citole, and of rote, with many a tune, and many a note uppon musique, upponn mesure, and of hire harpe the temprure • he tauht here eke, as he welle couth. bot as men seyn, that frele is youth ' with leiser and contynuans, this maide felle upon a chauns, that love hath made hym a querele ayeyn hire youth fressh and frele; that malgre where she wole or nouht, she mote with alle hire hertes thouht to love and to his lawe obeye, and that she shalle full sore abeie: for she wote never what it is, bot ever amonge she feleth this, touchynge upon this man of tyr hire hert is hote as eny fyre, and othirwhile it is a cale. nowe is she redde, nowe is she pale, ryht after the condicion of hire imaginacion. prince of tyr. and ever amonge here thouhtes alle she thouhte, what so may befalle, or that she lauh or that she wepe, she wolde here goode name kepe for fere of womannysshe shame. bot what in ernest and in game she stant for love in such a plitht, that she hath loste alle appetite of mete, of drynke, of nyhtes reste, as she note what is the beste. bot for to thenken alle hire fille, she helde hyr ofte tymes stille within here chambre, and goth not oute, the kynge was of hire liff in doute, wich wiste no thyng what it mente. * qualiter tres filii principum filiam regis sigillatim in uxorem suis tº supplicationibus postularunt. . …” bot felle a tyme, as he owt wente to walke, of prynces sones thre ther come, and felle to fore his kne, and eche of hem in sondrie wise by souht, and profreth his service, so that he myht his douhter have. the kynge, wich wolde his honour save, seith, she is seke; and of that speche tho was no tyme to by seche, bot eche of hem do make a bille he bade, and write his owne wille, his name, his fader, and his gode; and whanne she wiste howe that it stode, and hadde here billes overseynn, they sholden have answere ayenn. of this conceile thei weren gladde, and writen, as the kynge hem badde; y appollin us. the and every man his owhne booke into the kynges honde by toke; and he it to his douhter sende, and preide hire for to make an ende, and write ayen hire owne honde, riht as she in here herte fonde. ºf qualiter filia regis, omnibus aliis relictis, appollinum in maritum praeelegit. * the bylles were welle receyved, bot she hathe all here loves weyved; and thouhte tho was tyme and space to put here in here faders grace, and wrote ayen, and thus she seide. the shame wich is in a maide with speche dar not ben unloke, bot in writyng it may be spoke; so write i to yowe, fader, thus:– but ify have appollinus, of alle this worlde what so bytide, i wolle noon othir man abide : and certes if i of hym faile i wote riht welle, with outen faile, ye shull for me be douhterles. this lettir came, and ther was prees to fore the kyng, there as he stode; and whan that he it understode, he yaff hem answere by and by : bot that was do so pryvely, that noon of othir counceile wiste. thei toke here leve, and whan hem liste thei wente forth uppon here weye. the kyng newolde not bewreye the conceil for no maner hihe, bot suffreth tille he tyme sihe. prince of tyr. * qualiter rex et regina in maritagium filiae suae cum appollino con- sentierunt. and whan that he to chambre is come, he hath in to his conceile nome this man of tyr, and lete hym se this lettir, and alle the pryvete the wiche his douhter to hym sente. and he his knee to grounde bente, and thonketh hym and here also and er thei wente than a two, with gode herte, and with gode corage, of fulle love and fulle mariage the kynge and he been hole accorded and aftir, whan it was recorded unto the douhter howe it stode, the yifte of all the worldes gode ne sholde have made hir half so blithe. and for with alle the kynge as swyth, for he wolde have hire gode assent, hath for the queene hire moder sent. the qweene is come, and whanne she herde of this matere, how that it ferde, she sihe debat, she sihe disese, bot if she wolde hir douhter please, and is therto assented fulle: wich is a dede wonderfull, for no man knewe the soth cas bot he hym self, what man he was; and natheles, so as hem thouht, hise dedes to the soth wrouht, that he was come of gentile blode, hym lakketh nouht bot worldes gode. and as therof is no despeier, for she shal be hir faders heir, appollinus, the and he was able to governe. thus wolle they not the love werne of hym and here in noon wise; bot, alle accorded, thei devise * qualiter appolinus filiae regis nupsit, et prima nocte cum ea concu- biens ipsam impregnavit. the day and tyme of mariage. wher love is lorde of the corage him thenketh longe, er that he spede bot att the laste unto the dede. the tyme is come, and in here wyse, with grete offrynge and sacrifice, thei wedde, and make a rich feste, and every thynge was riht honeste. withinn howse, and eke with oute it was so doon, that alle a boute of grete worshippe, and grete noblesse, ther cryde many man largesse unto the lordes hihe and lowde. the knyhtes, that ben yonge and prowde, they jouste ferste, and aftir daunce. the day is go, the nyhtes chaunce hath derked alle the bryht sonne : this lorde, wich hath his love wonne, is go to bedde with his wyff, where as they ladde a lusty lyff: and that was aftir somdele sene, for as they pleiden hem betwene they gete a childe by twene hem two, to whome felle aftir mochel wo. prince of tyr. * qualiter ambassiatores a tyro in quadam navi pentapolim venientes, mortem regis antiochi appollino nunciaverunt. t now, have i tolde of the spousailes; bot for to speke of the merveiles whiche aftirwarde to hem byfelle, - it is a wonder for to telle. " it felle a daye they riden owte the kyng, and qweene, and alle the rowte, to pleyn hem upponne the stronde, where alle thei seen towarde the londe a shippe seilyng of great aray. to knowe what it mene may, til it be come thei abide : than thei stonde on every side, endlong the shipes borde, to shewe of penonceals a ryche rewe. thei axen, when the shippe is come ! fro tyr anon answered some. and over this theiseiden more, the cause whic thei come fore was for to seche, and for to fynde appollinus, wich is of kynde hire liege lorde: and he appereth, and of the tale wich he hereth he was right gladde; for thei hym tolde that for vengeaunce, as god it wolde, antiochus, as men may wete, with thonder and lihtenyng is sor smete. his douhter hath the same chaunce, so be thei bothe in o balance. for thi owre liege lorde we seie, in name of alle the londe, and prey, that lefte alle othir thyng to done, it like yow to come sone, appollinus, the and see youre owne liege men, with othir that be of youre kyn, that lyven in longyng and desire til ye be come ayen to tyr. this tale, aftir the kinge yt hadde, pentapolym alle over spradde, ther was no joye for to seche; for every man it hadde in speche, and seide alle of oonn accorde, a worthy kyng shalle ben oure lorde: that thouht us ferst an hevynesse is shape us nowe to grete gladnesse. * qualiter appollino cum uxore sua impregnata a pentapoli versus tyrum navigantibus contigit uxorem mortis articulo angustiatam, in navi filiam, quae postea taysis vocabatur, parere. thus goth this tydyng over alle, bot nede he mote that nede shalle. appollinus his leve tooke to god and alle the londe by toke, with alle the peple longe and brode, that he no lenger ther abode. " the kyng and qweene sorowe made, bot yit somdele they were glade of suche thyng as they herden tho: and thus by twene the wele and wo to shippe he goth, his wif with childe, the wich was ever meke and mylde, and wolde not departe hym fro, such love was be twene hem two. lychorida for hire office was take, wich was a norice, to wende with this yonge wifſ, to whome was shape a wofull lyf. withinn a tyme, as it be tidde, whan they were in the see a mydde, appollinus, the a thowsande sithes he here kyste, was never man that sihe ne wiste a sorwe unto his sorwe liche. was ever amonge uppon the liche he felle a swone, as he that souhte his owne deth, wich he by souhte unto the goddes alle above, with many a petous worde of love. bot such wordes as tho were yit herde never mannes ere bot only thilke wich he seide. the maister shippman came and preide, with othir such as be ther inne, and seyn, that he may no thyng wynne ayeyn the deth, bot they hym rede he be welle ware, and take hede. the se by wey of his nature recey've may no creature, with inne hym self as for to holde the wich is dede ; for thi thei wolde, as thei counsellen alle aboute, the dede body castyn oute : for bettir it is, theiseiden alle, that it of hire so by falle, than if theisholden alle spille. " the kyng wich understode here wille, and knewe here conceile that was trewe, byganne ayen to sorwe newe with pitous herte, and thus to seye: it is alle reason that ye pray. prince of tyr. riht as the corps was throwe on londe, there came walkyng upponn the stronde a worthy clerk, a surgyen, and eke a grete phisicien, of alle that londe the wisest oon, wich hiht maister cerymon: there were of his disciples somme. this maister to the cofre is come, and peyseth ther was sommewhat inne, and bade hem bere it to his inne, and goth hym self forth with alle. all that shall falle, falle shalle. thei comen home, and tarye nouht: this cofre in to chambre brouht, wich that thei fynde faste stoke, bot thei with crafte it have unloke. thei loken inne, where as thei founde a body ded, wich was i wounde in cloth of golde, as i seide er: the tresour eke they founden ther forth with the lettir, wich thei rede, and tho thei token bettir hede. unsowed was the body sone: as he that knewe what was to done, this noble clerke, with alle haste be ganne the veynes for to taste, and seih hire age was of youthe: and with the craftes wich he couthe, he souht and fonde a signe of liff. with that this worthi kynges wiff honestly thei token oute, and maden fires alle aboute. thei leide hire on a couche softe, and with a shete warmed ofte here colde breste be ganne to hete, here herte also to flakke and bete. prince of tyr. as fertorthly as she it wiste. and he here tolde howe in a kiste the see here threwe uppon the londe, and what tresoure with here he fonde, wich is alle redy att hire wille, as he that shope hym to fulfille with alle his myht what thynge he sholde. she thonketh hym, that he so wolde, and alle here herte she descloseth, and seith hym welle that she supposith here lorde be dreynt, hire childe also: so seih she nouht bot alle wo. wherof as to the worlde no more ne wole she torne, and preieth therfore, that in some temple in the cite, to kepe and holde here chastite she myht a monge the women dwelle. whanne he this tale here herde telle he was right gladde, and made hire knowenn that he a douhter of his owne hath, wich he wole unto hir yeve, to serve while thei bothe lyve, in stede of that, wich she hath loste: alle only alle att his owhne coste, she shalle be rendred forth with hire. she seith, graunte mercy, leve sire, god qwyte it yowe, ther i ne may. and thus thei dryve forth the daye, til tyme come, that she was hole : and tho thei taken here conceile hole to shape upon gode ordynaunce, and made a worthie purveaunce ayen the daie that theiben veiled. and thus whan that thei be conceiled, in blake clothes thei hem clothe, this lady and the douhter bothe, appollinus, the and yolde hem to religion. the feste, and the professionn, aftir the rule of that degre, was made with great solempnite, where as diana is seyntefied. thus stant this lady justified in ordre where she thenketh to dwelle. * bot nowe ayenwarde for to telle in what pliht that hire lorde stode inne. he seileth, tille he may wynne the havene of tharse, as i seide er. whan appolinus was arryved there, * qualiter appollinus tharsim navigans, filiam suam. thaysim strangu- lioni et dionysiae uxori suae educandam commendavit; et deinde tyrum adiit, ubi cum inestimabili gaudio a suis receptus est. tho yit was thurh the cite knowe, men myht se with inne a throwe as who seith alle the towne at ones, that come ayen hym for the nones to yeven hym the reverence, so gladde they were of his presence. and thouh he were in his corage dishesed, yit with glad visage he made hem chere; and to his inne, where he some tyme sojorned inne he goth hym strauht, and was recey'ved. and whan the pres of peple is weyved, he taketh his oste unto hym tho, and seith : my frende strangulio, lo thus, and thus it is by falle: and thou thi self arte oon of alle, forth with thy wiff, that i most triste: for thi if it yow both liste, my douhter thayse, by youre leve, i thenke shalle with yow bileve prince of tyr. - as for a tyme; and thus i pray that she be kepte by alle weye : and whan she hath of age more, that she be sette to bokes lore. and this avowe to god i make that i shal never for hire sake my berde for no lykyng shave, tille it befalle that i have, in covenable tyme of age, by sett hire unto mariage. thus thei accorde, and alle is welle, and for to resten hym somme delle, as for a while he there sojorneth, and thanne he taketh his leve, and torneth to ship, and goth hym home to tyr; where every man with grete desire awaiteth uppon his commyng. bot whan the shippe came in seilyng, and thei a parceyven it is he, was never yit in no cite suche joye made, as thei tho made. his herte also be gan to glade of that he sihe his people glade. lo thus fortune his happe hath ladde: in sondry wise he was travailed, but how so ever he be assailed his latter ende shal be gode. " and for to speke howe that it stode of tayse his douhter, where she dwellith in tharse, as the cronique telleth. she was welle kept, she was welle loked, she was welle tauht, she was welle boked; so welle she spedde hire in hire yowth that she of every wisdome kouth, that for to seche in every londe so wys an othir no man fonde, z prince of tyr. and lede here oute of alle siht where that no man hire helpe myht, upponn the stronde nyhe the see, and there he shalle this mayden slee. this cherles hert is in a trance, as he wich drad hym of vengeance whan tyme comith an othir day, bot yit durste he not sey nay; bot swore, and seide he shalle fulfille here hestes atte hire owne wille. * qualiter dionysia, thaysimut occideret, theophilo servo suo tra- didit, qui cum noctanter longius ab urbe ipsam prope litus maris interficere proposuerat, piratae ibidem latitantes thaysim de manu carnificiseripuerunt, ipsamgue usque civitatem mitelenam ducen: tes, cuidam leonino, scortorum ibidem magistro, vendiderunt. * the treson and the tyme is shape, so felle it that this cherlysch knape hath ladde this maiden where he wolde uppon the stronde, and what she sholde she was a dradde; and he oute braide a rusty swerde, and to here seide, thow shalt be ded: alas, quod she, whi shal i so lo thus, quod he, my lady dyonise hath bede thou shalt be mortherde in this stede. this maide tho for fere shrihte, and for the love of god alle myht she preyth, that for a litell stounde she myht knele upponn the grounde towarde the he vene, for to crave here wofulle sowle that she may save. and with this noise and with this crye owte of a barge faste by, wich hidde was there on scomerſare, men sterte owte, and weren ware z prince of tyr. clos in a chambre by hire self, • eche aftir othir ten or twelve of yong men to here in wente; bot such a grace god hire sente, that for the sorowe wich she made, was noon of hem wich power hade to don hire any vilenie. this leonyn lete evere aspie, and waiteth aftir grete byyete; bot alle for nouht: she was for lete that no man wolde there come. whan he therof hath hede nome, and knewe that she was yit a maide, unto his owhne man he saide, that with strenth ayen hire leve, tho sholde hire maidenhede by reve. this man goth in, but so it ferde, whan he here wofulle pleyntes herde, and he therof hath take kepe, hym luste bettir for to wepe than doon ouht elles to the game. and thus she kept hire self fro shame, and kneleth down to the erthe, and preyde unto this man, and thus she seide. if so be, that thi maister wolde that i his golde encrece sholde, it may nott falle by this weye; but soffre me to go my weye owte of this hous, where i am inne, and i shall make hym for to wynne in somme place elles of the towne, be so it be of religioun where that honest women dwelle. and thus thou myht thi maister telle that whanne i have a chambre there, let hym do crye ay wyde where prince of tyr. that she to leonyn hath wonne. and thus here name is so bygonne, of sondry thinges that she techeth, thatt alle the londe unto hire secheth of yonge women for to leere. * nowe lete we this maiden here, and speke of dyonyse ayen, and of theophile, the vileyn of wich i spake of nowe tofore, whan tayse sholde have be forlore. * qualiter theophilus ad dionysiam mane rediens affirmavit se thaysim occidisse; super quo dionysia una cum stranguilione marito suo dolorem in publico confingentes, exeguias et sepulturam honorifice quantum ad extra, subdola conjectatione fieri constituerunt. this fals clerke to this ladye, whan she came home alle pryvely, he seith: madame slayn i have this maide thaise, and is by grave in pryve place as ye me bede; for thi madame taketh hede, and kepe conceile howe so it stonde. this fende, wich this hath understonde, was gladde, and weneth it be soth: nowe herkene here aftir howe she doth. she wepeth, she soroweth, she compleyneth, and of sykenesse, wich she feigneth, she seith, that tayse sodeynly by myht is dede, as she and i to gedre leyn nyh my lorde. she was a woman of recorde, and alle is leved that she seith; and for to yeve a more feith here husbonde, and eke she, both in blake clothes they hem cloth. appollinus, the for she hym neweth ever amonge, and medeleth sorowe with his songe. bot sith it may no bettir be he thonketh god, and forth goth he seyling towarde tyrayeynn; bot sodeynly the wynde and reynn bygon uppon the see debate, so that he soffre mot algate, * qualiter navis appollini ventis agitata portum urbis mitelenae in die quo festa neptuni celebrari consueverunt, applicuit, sedipse prae dolore thaysis filiae suae quam mortuam reputabat, in fundo navis obscuro jacens lumen videre noluit. • the lawe, which neptune ordeyneth ‘wherof fulle ofte tyme he pleyneth, and helde hym welle the more esmayed of that he hath to fore assaied : so that for pure sorwe and care of that he seith his worlde so fare, the reste he lefte of his caban that for the conceile of no man, ayeyn therinne he nolde come, bot hath by neth his place nome, where he wepyng alone lay, there as he sihe no liht of day. and thus to fore the wynde they dryve tillonge and late thei aryve with grete distresse, as it was sene, upponn this towne of mitelene, wich was a noble cite tho. and hapneth thilke tyme so, the lordes bothe, and the comune the hihe feste of neptune, upponn the stronde attry vage, and as it was custume and usage, solemlich they by syhe. whan thei this strange vessel sihe prince of tyr. in many a subtile questioun; bot he for no suggestioun wich towarde hym she couthe stere, he wolde not o worde answere, bot as a madde man atte laste, his hed wepyng awey he caste, and half in wrath he bade here go: • bot yit she wolde nouht do so, and in the derke forth she goth 'til she hym towchith, and he wroth, and aftir hire with his honde he smote : and thus whan she hym fonde diseasyd, courtesly she seide avoy, my lorde, i am a mayde; and if ye wiste what i am, and owte of what lynage i cam, 'ye wolde not be so salvage. * qualiter, sicut deus destinavit, pater filiam inventam recognovit. with that he sobreth his corage, and put a wey his hevy chere. bot of hem two a man may lere what is to be so sybbe of blode, noon wiste of othir howe it stode, and yit the fader atte laste his herte upponn this maide caste, that he hire loveth kyndely; and yit he wiste never whic, bot all was knowe er that thei went; for god, wich wote here hole entent, here hertes both he desclosith. this kyng unto this maide opposeth, and axeth ferst, what is hire name, and where she lerned al this game, and of what kyn that she was come and she, that hath his wordes nome, appollinus, the answereth, and seith : my name is thaise that was some tyme welle at ayse. in tharse i was forth drawe and fed ther lerned i tille i was spedde, of that i can: my fader eke, i not where that i sholde hym seke: he was a kynge men tolde me. my moder dreynt was in the see. fropoynt to poynt alle she hym tolde that she hath longe in herte holde, and never dorste make hire mone but only to this lorde alle one, to whom hire herte can not hele, torne hit to wo, torne it to wele torne it to gode, torne it to harme. and he tho toke here in his arme; bot such a joye as he tho made was never seen : thus be thei glade that sory hadden be to forn. fro this day forth fortune hath sworne to sett hym upwarde on the whiel : so goth the worlde, now wo, now weel. * qualiter athenagoras appollinum de navi in hospitium honorifice recollegit, et thaysim patre consentiente, in uxorem duxit. * this kyng hath founde newe grace, so that oute of his derke place, he goth hym up into the liht; and with hym came that swete wint, his douhter tayse, and forth a noon thei bothe into the caban goon, wich was ordeyned for the kyng: and there he did of alle his thyng, and was arayed really, and owt he cam alle openly, where athenagoras he fonde, the wich was lorde of alle the londe, prince of tyr. and preyth the kynge to come and see his castell bothe, and his cite. and thus they goon forth alle in feere, this kyng, this lorde, this maiden dere. this lorde tho made hem riche feste, with every thyng wich was honeste to please with this worthie kynge. ther lacketh hym no maner thyng; bot yit for alle his noble araye, wyfles he was unto that day. as he that yit was of yonge age, so felle there in to his corage the lusty wo, the glade peyne of love, whiche no man restreygne yit never myht, as nowe to fore. this lorde thenketh alle his worlde for lore bot if the kynge wolde doonn hym grace, he waiteth tyme, he waiteth place, hym thouhte his herte wolle to breke tille he may to this maide speke, and to hire fader eke also for mariage: and it felle so that alle, was do riht as he thouht: his purpos to an ende he brouht, * she weddeth hym as for here lorde, ' thus be thei alle of oonn accorde. * qualiter appollinus, una cum filia et ejus marito, navem ingredientes a mitelena usque tharsim cursum proposuerunt, sed appollinus in somnis admonitus versus ephesim, ut ibidem in templo dianae sacrificavet, vela per mare divertit. * whan alle was do riht as thei wolde, the kynge unto his sone tolde of tharse thilke traiterie, and seide, howe in his compaignie prince of tyr. to shapyn hym in such a wise, that he may by the morowe arise and doon aftir the maundement of hym wich hath hym thider sent. and in the wise that he thouht, upponn the morowe he so wrouht: his douhter, and his sone he nome, and forth in to the temple he come, with a grete rowte in compaignie, his yeſtes for to sacrafie. the citezeyns tho herden seye of such a kyng, that came to preye unto dyane, the goddesse, and lefte alle othir besynesse: they comen the der for to se the kyng and the solempnite. * qualiter appollinus ephesim in templo diane sacrificans, uxorem suam ibidem velatam invenit, qua secum assumpta in navem versus tyrum regressus est. t with worthi knyhtes environed, the kynge hym self hath abandoned in to the temple in good entente. the dore is uppe, and in he wente, where as with gret devocioun of holy contemplacioun with inne his herte he made his shrifte, and aftir that a rich yeſte he offreth with grete reverence; and there in open audience of hem that stoden alle aboute he tolde hem, and declareth owte his happe, suche as hym is byfalle: ther was no thyng foryete of alle. his wifſ, as it was goddes grace, wich was professed in the place, a a prince of tyr. and token leve, and goon to shipe with alle the hole felashippe. * qualiter appollinus, una cum uxore sua et filia sua, tyrum applicuit. t this kyng, wich nowe hath his desir, he seih he wole holde his cours to tyr. thei hadde wynde at wille, tho, with topselle cole, and forth thei go, and stryken never tille thei come, to tyr, where as thei havene nome, and londen hem with mochel blisse. tho was there many a mouth to kysse, ech on welcometh othir home; bot whan the queene to londe come, and thayse hire douhter by hire side, the joye wich was thilke tyde ther may no mannes tunge telle. theiseiden alle, here cometh the welle of alle womannessh grace. the kyng hath take his real place: the queene is in to chambre go. there was grete feste arayed tho. whan tyme was thei gon to mete, all olde sorwes ben foryete, and gladen hem with joys newe, the discolourde pale hewe is nowe bycome a rody cheke : ther was no merthe for to seke; * qualiter appollinus athenagoram, cum thayse uxore sua, super tyrum coronari fecit. " bot every man hath that he wolde. the kyng, as he welle couth and sholde, maketh to his people riht goode chere, and aftir soone, as thou shalt here, prince of tyr. with strenth of men, and comen sone and as hem thouhtitt was to done. atteynt thei weren by the lawe, and demed for to honge, and drawe, and brent, and with the wynde to blowe, that alle the worlde it myht knowe. and upponn this condicioun the dome in execucionn was put anon with oute faile. and every man hath grete merveile wich herde tellenn of this chaunce, and thonketh goddes purveaunce, wich doth mercy forth with justice. * slayn is the mordrer, and mordrice thurh verey trouth of rihtwessnesse; and thurh mercy sauf is symplesse of hire, whome mercy preserveth. thus hath he welle, that welle deserveth. * qualiter artestrate pentapolim rege mortuo, ipsi de regno epistolas super hoc appollino direxerunt, unde appollinus una cum uxore sua ibidem advenientes, ad decus imperii cum magno gaudio coro- nati sunt. £ . " whan alle this thyng is doon and ended, this kynge, wich loved was and frended, a lettre hath, wich came to hym by shippe fro pentapolim; in wich the londe hath to hym write, that he wolde understonde and wite how in goode mynde and in goode pees, ded is the kyng artestrates; wherof thei alle of oon accorde hym preieden, as here liege lorde, that he the lettre wole conceyve, and come his regne to recey've wich god hath youe hym, and fortune. and thus bysouht the comoune, ; „ illustrated jr nr ncili. l/lb v; ki i: t'ur.'ur^r.'ur.^r.'ur.'ur.'ur.'urxur.'ur/jr.'ur.'un'ur ,t r. >.- harvard college library u ,-< r- * jt r n vfe * -j r, % ~jl r. % bought with the income of the t $ emily louise kissner ! $ book fund *t r i, • :x: / v^ =h v^-—• . ^' ,j* «^ jf' «^ @ s' <"• >*w v/^ chapter one fortable that i found them dismally stupid. nothing in that corner of oz interested me, but i believed that in other parts of the country i would find strange people and see new sights, and so i set out upon my wandering journey. i have been a wan- derer for nearly a full year, and now my wanderings have brought me to this splendid castle." "i suppose," said the tin woodman, "that in this year you have seen so much that you have become very wise." "no," replied woot, thoughtfully, "i am not at all wise, i beg to assure your majesty. the more i wander the less i find that i know, for in the land of oz much wisdom and many things may be learned." "to learn is simple. don't you ask questions?" inquired the scarecrow. "yes; i ask as many questions as i dare; but some people refuse to answer questions." "that is not kind of them," declared the tin wood- man. "if one does not ask for information he seldom receives it; so i, for my part, make it a rule to answer any civil question that is asked me." "so do i," added the scarecrow, nodding. "i am glad to hear this," said the wanderer, r chapter one the boy ate in silence for a time, being really hungry, but after his appetite was somewhat satis- fied, he said: "how happened your majesty to be made of tin, and still be alive?" "that," replied the tin man, "is a long story." "the longer the better," said the boy. "won't you please tell me the story?" "if you desire it," promised the tin woodman, leaning*- back in his tin throne and crossing his tin legs. "i haven't related my history in a long while, the tin woodman of oz because everyone here knows it nearly as well as i do. but you, being a stranger, are no doubt curious to learn how i became so beautiful and prosperous, so i will recite for your benefit my strange adven- tures." "thank you," said woot the wanderer, still eating. "i was not always made of tin," began the emperor, "for in the beginning i was a man of flesh and bone and blood and lived in the munchkin country of oz. there i was, by trade, a woodchop- per, and contributed my share to the comfort of the oz people by chopping up the trees of the forest to make firewood, with which the women would cook their meals while the children warmed themselves about the fires. for my home i had a little hut by the edge of the forest, and my life was one of much content until i fell in love with a beautiful munch- kin girl who lived not far away." "what was the munchkin girl's name?" asked woot. "nimmie amee. this girl, so fair that the sunsets blushed when their rays fell upon her, lived with a powerful witch who wore silver shoes and who had made the poor child her slave. nimmie amee was obliged to work from morning till night for the chapter one old witch of the east, scrubbing and sweeping her hut and cooking her meals and washing her dishes. she had to cut firewood, too, until i found her one day in the forest and fell in love with her. after that, i always brought plenty of firewood to nimmie amee and we became very friendly. finally i asked her to marry me, and she agreed to do so, but the witch happened to overhear our conversation and it made her very angry, for she did not wish her slave to be taken away from her. the witch commanded me never to come near nimmie amee again, but i told her i was my own master and would do as i pleased, not realizing that this was a careless way to speak to a witch. "the next day, as i was cutting wood in the for- est, the cruel witch enchanted my axe, so that it slipped and cut off my right leg." "how dreadful!" cried woot the wanderer. "yes, it was a seeming misfortune," agreed the tin man, "for a one-legged woodchopper is of little use in his trade. but i would not allow the witch to conquer me so easily. i knew a very skillful mechanic at the other side of the forest, who was my friend, so i hopped on one leg to him and asked him to help me. he soon made me a new leg out of tin the tin woodman of oz and fastened it cleverly to my meat body. it had joints at the knee and at the ankle and was almost as comfortable as the leg i had lost." "your friend must have been a wonderful work- man!" exclaimed woot. "he was, indeed," admitted the emperor. "he was a tinsmith by trade and could make anything out of tin. when i returned to nimmie amee, the girl was delighted and threw her arms around my neck and kissed me, declaring she was proud of me. the witch saw the kiss and was more angry than before. when i went to work in the forest, next day, my axe, being still enchanted, slipped and cut off my other leg. again i hopped — on my tin leg — to my friend the tinsmith, who kindly made me another tin leg and fastened it to my body. so i returned joyfully to nimmie amee, who was much pleased with my glittering legs and promised that when we were wed she would always keep them oiled and polished. but the witch was more furious than ever, and as soon as i raised my axe to chop, it twisted around and cut off one of my arms. the tinsmith made me a tin arm and i was not much worried, because nimmie amee declared she still loved me." the heart of the tin woodman tee chapter the emperor of the winkles paused in his story to reach for an oil-can, with which he carefully oiled the joints in his tin throat, for his voice had begun to squeak a little. woot the wanderer, having satisfied his hunger, watched this oiling process with much' curiosity, but begged the tin man to go on with his tale. chapter two more fear of the wicked witch, for she was powerless to injure me. nimmie amee said we must be married at once, for then she could come to my cottage and live with me and keep me bright and sparkling. "' i am sure, my dear nick,' said the brave and beautiful girl — my name w?js then nick chopper, you should be told —' that you will make the best husband any girl could have. i shall not be obliged to cook for you, for now you do not eat; i shall not have to make your bed, for tin does not tire or require sleep; when we go to a dance, you will not get weary before the music stops and say you want to go home. all day long, while you are chopping wood in the forest, i shall be able to amuse myself in my own way — a privilege few wives enjoy. there is no temper in your new head, so you will not get angry with me. finally, i shall take pride in being the wife of the only live tin woodman in all the world!' which shows that nimmie amee was as wise as she was brave and beautiful." "i think she was a very nice girl," said woot the wanderer. "but, tell me, please, why were you not killed when you were chopped to pieces?" "in the land of oz," replied the emperor, "no one can ever be killed. a. man with a wooden leg or a the tin woodman of oz tin leg is still the same man; and, as i lost parts of my meat body by degrees, i always remained the same person as in the beginning, even though in the end i was all tin and no meat." "i see," said the boy, thoughtfully. "and did you marry nimmie amee? t "no," answered the tin woodman, " i did not. she said she still loved me, but i found that i no longer loved her. my tin body contained no heart, and without a heart no one can love. so the wicked witch conquered in the end, and when i left the munchkin country of oz, the poor girl was still the slave of the witch and had to do her bidding day and night." "where did you go?" asked woot. "well, i first started out to find a heart, so i could love nimmie amee again; but hearts are more scarce than one would think. one day, in a big forest that was strange to me, my joints suddenly became rusted, because i had forgotten to oil them. there i stood, unable to move hand or foot. and there i continued to stand — while days came and went — until dor- othy and the scarecrow came along and rescued me. they oiled my joints and set me free, and i've taken good care never to rust again." chapter two "who .was this dorothy?" questioned the wan- derer. "a little girl who happened to be in a house when it was carried by; a cyclone all the way from kansas to the land of oz. when the house fell, in the munchkin country, it fortunately landed on the wicked witch and smashed her flat. it was a big house, and i think the witch is under it yet." "no," said the scarecrow, correcting him, "dor- othy says the witch turned to dust, and the wind scattered the dust in every direction." "well," continued the tin woodman, "after meet- ing the scarecrow and dorothy, i went with them to the emerald city, where the wizard of oz gave me a heart. but the wizard's stock of hearts was low, and he gave me a kind heart instead of a lov- ing heart, so that i could not love nimmie amee any more than i did when i was heartless." "couldn't the wizard give you a heart that was both kind and loving?" asked the boy. "no; that was what i asked for, but he said he was so short on hearts, just then, that there was but one in stock, and i could take that or none at all. so i accepted it, and i must say that for its kind it is a very good heart indeed." the tin woodman of oz "it seems to me," said woot, musingly, "that the wizard fooled you. it can't be a very kind heart, you know." "why not?" demanded the emperor. "because it was unkind of you to desert the girl who loved you, and who had been faithful and true to you when you were in trouble. had the heart the wizard gave you been a kind heart, you would have gone back home and made the beautiful munch- kin girl your wife, and then brought her here to be an empress and live in your splendid tin castle." the tin woodman was so surprised at this frank speech that for a time he did nothing but stare hard at the boy wanderer. but the scarecrow wagged his stuffed head and said in a positive tone: "this boy is right. i've often wondered, myself, why you didn't go back and find that poor munchkin girl." then the tin woodman stared hard at his friend the scarecrow. but finally he said in a serious tone of voice: "i must admit that never before have i thought of such a thing as finding mmmie amee and making her empress of the winkies. but it is surely not too late, even now, to do this, for the girl must still be chapter two living in the munchkin country. and, since this strange wanderer has reminded me of nimmie amee, i believe it is my duty to set out and find her. surely it is not the girl's fault that i no longer love her, and so, if i can make her happy, it is proper that i should do so, and in this way reward her for her faith- fulness." "quite right, my friend!" agreed the scarecrow. "will you accompany me on this errand?" asked the tin emperor. the tin woodman of oz "of course," said the scarecrow. "and will you take me along?" pleaded woot the wanderer in an eager voice. "to be sure," said the tin woodman, "if you care to join our party. it was you who first told me it was my duty to find and marry nimmie amee, and i'd like you to know that nick chopper, the tin emperor of the winkies, is a man who never shirks his duty, once it is pointed out to him." "it ought to be a pleasure, as well as a duty, if the girl is so beautiful," said woot, well pleased with the idea of the adventure. "beautiful things may be admired, if not loved," asserted the tin man. "flowers are beautiful, for instance, but we are not inclined to marry them. duty, on the contrary, is a bugle call to action, whether you are inclined to act, or not. in this case, i obey the bugle call of duty." "when shall we start?" inquired the scarecrow, who was always glad to embark upon a new adven- ture. "i don't hear any bugle, but when do we go?" "as soon as we can get ready," answered the emperor. "i'll call my servants at once and order them to make preparations for our journey." roundabout £cq = chapter woot the wanderer slept that night in the tin castle of the emperor of the winkies and found his tin bed quite comfortable. early the next morning he rose and took a walk through the gardens, where there were tin foun- tains and beds of curious tin flowers, and where tin birds perched upon the branches of » ii the tin woodman of oz tin trees and sang songs that sounded like the notes of tin whistles. all these wonders had been made by the clever winkie tinsmiths, who wound the birds up every morning so that they would move about and sing. after breakfast the boy went into the throne room, where the emperor was having his tin joints care- fully oiled by a servant, while other servants were stuffing sweet, fresh straw into the body of the scarecrow. woot watched this operation with much interest, for the scarecrow's body was only a suit of clothes filled with straw. the coat was buttoned tight to keep the packed straw from falling out and a rope was tied around the waist to hold it in shape and prevent the straw from sagging down. the scare- crow's head was a gunnysack filled with bran, on which the eyes, nose and mouth had been painted. his hands were white cotton gloves stuffed with fine straw. woot noticed that even when carefully stuffed and patted into shape, the straw man was awkward in his movements and decidedly wobbly on his feet, so the boy wondered if the scarecrow would be able to travel with them all the way to the forests of the munchkin country of oz. chapter three the preparations made for this important journey were very simple. a knapsack was filled with food and given woot the wanderer to carry upon his back, for the food was for his use alone. the tin woodman shouldered an axe which was sharp and brightly idont near anij bnqle polished, and the scarecrow put the emperor's oil- can in his pocket, that he might oil his friend's joints should they need it. "who will govern the winkie country during your absence?" asked the boy. the tin woodman of oz "why, the country will run itself," answered the emperor. "as a matter of fact, my people do not need an emperor, for ozma of oz watches over the welfare of all her subjects, including the winkies. like a good many kings and emperors, i have a grand title, but very little real power, which allows me time to amuse myself in my own way. the people of oz have but one law to obey, which is: * behave yourself,' so it is easy for them to abide by this law, and you'll notice they behave very well. but it is time for us to be off, and i am eager to start because i suppose that that poor munchkin girl is anxiously awaiting my coming." "she's waited a long time already, seems to me," remarked the scarecrow, as they left the grounds of the castle and followed a path that led eastward. "true," replied the tin woodman; "but i've noticed that the last end of a wait, however long it has been, is the hardest to endure; so i must try to make nimmie amee happy as soon as possible." "ah; that proves you have a kind heart," remarked the scarecrow, approvingly. "it's too bad he hasn't a loving heart," said woot. "this tin man is going to marry a nice girl through the tin woodman of oz for both of us. after i have found nimmie amee and she has managed to control her joy at our reunion, i shall take her to the emerald city and introduce her to ozma and dorothy, and to betsy bobbin and tiny trot, and all our other friends; but, if i remem- ber rightly, poor nimmie amee has a sharp tongue when angry, and she may be a trifle angry with me, at first, because i have been so long in coming to her." "i can understand that," said woot gravely. "but how can we get to that part of the munchkin country where you once lived without passing through the emerald city?" "why, that is easy," the tin man assured him. "i have a map of oz in my pocket," persisted the boy, "and it shows that the winkie country, where we now are, is at the west of oz, and the munchkin country at the east, while directly between them lies the emerald city." "true enough; but we shall go toward the north, first of all, into the gillikin country, and so pass around the emerald city," explained the tin wood- man. "that may prove a dangerous journey," replied the boy. "i used to live in one of the top corners of the gillikin country, near to oogaboo, and i have chapter three been told that in this northland country are many people whom it is not pleasant to meet. i was very careful to avoid them during my journey south." "a wanderer should have no fear," observed the scarecrow, who was wabbling along in a funny, hap- hazard manner, but keeping pace with his friends. "fear does not make one a coward," returned woot, growing a little red in the face, "but i believe it is more easy to avoid danger than to overcome it. the safest way is the best way, even for one who is brave and determined." the tin woodman of oz "do not worry, for we shall not go far to the north," said the emperor, "my one idea is to avoid the emerald city without going out of our way more than is necessary. once around the emerald city we will turn south into the munchkin country, where the scarecrow and i are well acquainted and have many friends." "i have traveled some in the gillikin country," remarked the scarecrow, "and while i must say i have met some strange people there at times, i have never yet been harmed by them." "well, it's all the same to me," said woot, with assumed carelessness. "dangers, when they cannot be avoided, are often quite interesting, and i am willing to go wherever you two venture to go." so they left the path they had been following and began to travel toward the northeast, and all that dag they were in the pleasant winkie country, and all the people they met saluted the emperor with great respect and wished him good luck on his jour- ney. at night they stopped at a house where they were well entertained and where woot was given a comfortable bed to sleep in. "were the scarecrow and i alone," said the tin woodman, "we would travel by night as well as chapter three by day; but with a meat person in our party, we must halt at night to permit him to rest." "meat tires, after a day's travel," added the scare- crow, "while straw and tin never tire at all. which proves," said he, "that we are somewhat superior to people made in the common way." woot could not deny that he was tired, and he slept soundly until morning, when he was given a good breakfast, smoking hot. "you two miss a great deal by not eating," he said to his companions. "it is true," responded the scarecrow. "we miss suffering from hunger, when food cannot be had, and we miss a stomach-ache, now and then." as he said this, the scarecrow glanced at the tin woodman, who nodded his assent. all that second day they traveled steadily, enter- taining one another the while with stories of adven- tures they had formerly met and listening to the scarecrow recite poetry. he had learned a great many poems from professor wogglebug and loved to repeat them whenever anybody would listen to him. of course woot and the tin woodman now listened, because they could not do otherwise — unless they rudely ran away from their stuffed comrade. the tin woodman of oz one of the scarecrow's recitations was like this: "what sound is so sweet as the straw from the wheat when it crunkles so tender and low? it is yellow and bright, so it gives me delight to crunkle wherever i go. "sweet, fresh, golden straw! there is surely no flaw in a stuffing so clean and compact. it creaks when i walk, and it thrills when i talk, and its fragrance is fine, for a fact. "to cut me don't hurt, for i've no blood to squirt, and i therefore can suffer no pain; the straw that i use doesn't lump up or bruise, though it's pounded again and again! "i know it is said that my beautiful head has brains of mixed wheat-straw and bran, but my thoughts are so good chapter three i'd not change, if i could, for the brains of a common meat man. "content with my lot, i'm glad that i'm not like others i meet day by day; if my insides get musty, or mussed-up, or dusty, i get newly stuffed right away." chapter four wild and uncultivated and there were no houses of any sort to be seen. but our friends kept on walking even after the sun went down, hoping to find a good place for woot the wanderer to sleep; but when it grew quite dark and the boy was weary with his long walk, they halted right in the middle of a field and allowed woot to get his supper from the food he carried in his knapsack. then the scarecrow laid himself down, so that woot could use his stuffed body as a pillow, and the tin woodman stood up beside them all night, so the dampness of the ground might not rust his joints or dull his brilliant polish. whenever the dew settled on his body he carefully wiped it off with a cloth, and so in the morning the emperor shone as brightly as ever in the rays of the rising sun. they wakened the boy at daybreak, the scarecrow saying to him: "we have discovered something queer, and there- fore we must counsel together what to do about it." "what have you discovered? " asked woot, rubbing the sleep from his eyes with his knuckles and giving three wide yawns to prove he was fully awake. "a sign," said the tin woodman. "a sign, and another path." chapter four "i'd like to see what loonville looks like," re- marked the tin woodman. "when one travels, it is foolish to miss any inter- esting sight," added the scarecrow. "but a warning means danger," protested woot the wanderer, "and i believe it sensible to keep out of danger whenever we can." they made no reply to this speech for a while. then said the scarecrow: "i have escaped so many dangers, during my life- time, that i am not much afraid of anything that can happen." "nor am l " exclaimed the tin woodman, swing- ing his glittering axe around his tin head, in a series of circles. "few things can injure tin, and my axe is a powerful weapon to use against a foe. but our boy friend," he continued, looking solemnly at woot, "might perhaps be injured if the people of loonville are really dangerous; so i propose he waits here while you and i, friend scarecrow, visit the forbidden city of loonville."