Apophthegmes new and old. Collected by the Right Honourable, Francis Lo. Verulam, Viscount St. Alban Bacon, Francis, 1561-1626. 1625 Approx. 104 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 155 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2003-01 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A01043 STC 1115 ESTC S113684 99848915 99848915 14037 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A01043) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 14037) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 617:08) Apophthegmes new and old. Collected by the Right Honourable, Francis Lo. Verulam, Viscount St. Alban Bacon, Francis, 1561-1626. [4], 307, [1] p. Printed [by J. Haviland] for Hanna Barret, and Richard Whittaker, and are to be sold at the Kings head in Pauls Chuch-yard, London : 1625. Printer's name from STC. The first leaf is blank. Reproduction of the original in the Cambridge University Library. Created by converting TCP files to TEI P5 using tcp2tei.xsl, TEI @ Oxford. Re-processed by University of Nebraska-Lincoln and Northwestern, with changes to facilitate morpho-syntactic tagging. Gap elements of known extent have been transformed into placeholder characters or elements to simplify the filling in of gaps by user contributors. EEBO-TCP is a partnership between the Universities of Michigan and Oxford and the publisher ProQuest to create accurately transcribed and encoded texts based on the image sets published by ProQuest via their Early English Books Online (EEBO) database (http://eebo.chadwyck.com). The general aim of EEBO-TCP is to encode one copy (usually the first edition) of every monographic English-language title published between 1473 and 1700 available in EEBO. EEBO-TCP aimed to produce large quantities of textual data within the usual project restraints of time and funding, and therefore chose to create diplomatic transcriptions (as opposed to critical editions) with light-touch, mainly structural encoding based on the Text Encoding Initiative (http://www.tei-c.org). The EEBO-TCP project was divided into two phases. The 25,363 texts created during Phase 1 of the project have been released into the public domain as of 1 January 2015. Anyone can now take and use these texts for their own purposes, but we respectfully request that due credit and attribution is given to their original source. Users should be aware of the process of creating the TCP texts, and therefore of any assumptions that can be made about the data. Text selection was based on the New Cambridge Bibliography of English Literature (NCBEL). If an author (or for an anonymous work, the title) appears in NCBEL, then their works are eligible for inclusion. Selection was intended to range over a wide variety of subject areas, to reflect the true nature of the print record of the period. In general, first editions of a works in English were prioritized, although there are a number of works in other languages, notably Latin and Welsh, included and sometimes a second or later edition of a work was chosen if there was a compelling reason to do so. Image sets were sent to external keying companies for transcription and basic encoding. Quality assurance was then carried out by editorial teams in Oxford and Michigan. 5% (or 5 pages, whichever is the greater) of each text was proofread for accuracy and those which did not meet QA standards were returned to the keyers to be redone. After proofreading, the encoding was enhanced and/or corrected and characters marked as illegible were corrected where possible up to a limit of 100 instances per text. Any remaining illegibles were encoded as s. Understanding these processes should make clear that, while the overall quality of TCP data is very good, some errors will remain and some readable characters will be marked as illegible. Users should bear in mind that in all likelihood such instances will never have been looked at by a TCP editor. The texts were encoded and linked to page images in accordance with level 4 of the TEI in Libraries guidelines. Copies of the texts have been issued variously as SGML (TCP schema; ASCII text with mnemonic sdata character entities); displayable XML (TCP schema; characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or text strings within braces); or lossless XML (TEI P5, characters represented either as UTF-8 Unicode or TEI g elements). Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Anecdotes -- Early works to 1800. Aphorisms and apothegms -- Early works to 1800. 2002-03 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2002-04 Apex CoVantage Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2002-05 TCP Staff (Oxford) Sampled and proofread 2002-07 Apex CoVantage Rekeyed and resubmitted 2002-08 Emma (Leeson) Huber Sampled and proofread 2002-08 Emma (Leeson) Huber Text and markup reviewed and edited 2002-10 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion Apophthegmes NEW AND OLD . COLLECTED BY THE RIGHT HONOVRABLE , Francis LO . VERVLAM , Viscount St. ALBAN . LONDON , Printed for Hanna Barret , and Richard Whittaker , and are to be sold at the Kings Head in Pauls Church-yard . 1625. Apophthegmes new and old . IVlius Caesar , did write a Collection of Apophthegmes , as appeares in an Epistle of Cicero . I need say no more , for the worth , of a Writing , of that nature . It is pitie his Booke is lost : for I imagine , they were collected , with Iudgement , and Choice : whereas that of Plutarch , and Stobaeus , and much more , the Moderne ones , draw much of the dregs . Certainly , they are of excellent vse . They are , Mucrones Verborum , Pointed Speeches . Cicero prettily cals them , Salinas , Salt pits ; that you may extract salt out of , and sprinkle it , where you will. They serue , to be interlaced , in continued Speech . They serue , to be recited , vpon occasiō of themselues . They serue , if you take out the kernell of them , and make them your owne . I haue , for my recreation , in my sicknesse , fann'd the Old ; Not omitting any , because they are vulgar ; ( for many vulgar ones are excellent good ; ) Nor for the meannesse of the Person ; but because they are dull , and flat : And added many New , that otherwise would haue died . 1. WHEN Queene Elizabeth had aduanced Ralegh , she was one day playing on the virginalls , and my Lo. of Oxford , & another Noble-man , stood by . It fell out so , that the Ledge , before the Iacks , was taken away , so as the Iacks were seene : My Lo. of Oxford , and the other Noble-man smiled , and a little whispered : The Queene marked it , and would needes know , What the matter was ? My Lo. of Oxford answered ; That they smiled , to see , that when Iacks went vp , Heads went downe . 2. Henrie the fourth of France , his Queene was great with Childe . Count Soi●…ons , that had his expectation vpon the Crowne ; when it was twice or thrice thought , that the Queene was with Childe before , said to fome of his Frends ; That it was but with a pillow . This had some wayes come to the Kings eare , who kept it til when the Queen waxed great ; call'd the Count of Soissons to him , and said , laying his hand vpon the Queenes belly ; Come Cousin , it is no pillow . Yes , Sir , ( answered the Count of Soissons ) it is a pillow , for all France to sleepe vpon . 3. There was a conference in Parliament , betweene the Vpper House , & the Lower , about a Bill of Accountants , which came downe , from the Lords , to the Commons : which Bill prayed , that the Lands of Accountants , whereof they were seized , when they entred vpon their Office , mought bee liable to their Arreares , to the Queene . But the Commons desired , that the Bill mought not looke backe , to Accountants that were alreadie , but extend onely to Accountanes hereafter . But the Lo. Threasurer said : Why , I pray , if you had lost your purse , by the waie , would you looke forwards , or would you looke backe ? The Queene hath lost her purse . 4. Queene Elizabeth , the morrow of her Coronation , went to the Chappell ; and in the great chamber , Sir Iohn Rainsford , set on by wiser Men , ( A Knight that had the libertie of a Buffone ) besought the Queene aloud ; That now , this good time , when prisoners were deliuered , foure prisoners , amongst the rest , mought likewise haue their libertie , who were like enough , to bee kept still in hold . The Queene asked ; Who they were ? And hee said ; Matthew , Mark , Luke , & Iohn ; who had long beene imprisoned , in the Latine tongue ; and now he defired , they mought goe abroad , among the people , in English . The Queene answered , with a graue countenance ; It were good ( Rainsford ) they were spoken with themselues , to know of them , whether they would be set at libertie ? 5. The Lo. Keeper , Sir Nicholas Bacon , was asked his opinion , by Queene Elizabeth , of one of these Monopoly Licences ; And hee answered ; Will you haue me speake truth , Madame ? Licentiâ omnes deteriores sumus . Wee are all the worse for a Licence . 6. Pace , the bitter Foole , was not suffered to come at the Queene , because of his bitter humor . Yet at one time , some perswaded the Queene , that hee should come to her , vndertaking for him , that hee should keepe compasse . So hee was brought to her , and the Queene said ; Come on Pace , now we shall beare of our faults . Saith Pace ; I doe not vse to talke of that , that all the Towne talkes of . 7. My Lo. of Essex , at the succor of Rhoan , made 24. Knights ; which at that time was a great matter . Diuerse of those Gentle-men , were of weake and small meanes ; which when Queene Elizabeth heard , shee said ; My Lo. mought haue done well , to haue built his Almes-House , before he made his Knights . 8. A great Officer in France , was in danger to haue lost his place . But his wife , by her suite , and means making , made his peace : whereupon a pleasant Fellow said ; That he had been crushed , but that he saued himselfe vpon his hornes . 9. Queene Anne Bullen , at the time , when she was led to bee beheaded , in the Tower , called one of the Kings Priuie Chamber to her , and said to him ; Commend mee to the King , and tell him , he is constant in his course of aduancing me . From a priuate Gentle-woman , he made me a Marquisse ; and from a Marquisse , a Queene ; and now he had left no higher degree of earthly honour , hee hath made me a Martyr . 10. Bishop Latimer said , in a Sermon , at Court ; That hee heard great speech , that the King was poore , and many waies were propounded to make him rich : For his part , he had thought of one way , which was ; That they should helpe the King to some good office , for all his Officers were rich . 11. Caesar Borgia , after long diuision , betweene him and the Lords of Romagna , fell to accord with them . In this accord , there was an Article , that hee should not call them , at any time , all together , in person : The meaning was , that knowing his dangerous nature If hee meant them treason , some one mought be free , to reuenge the rest . Neuerthelesse , hee did with such art , and faire vsage , win their confidence , that hee brought them all together to Counsell at Sinigalia , where hee mur●…her'd them all . This Act , when it was related vnto Pope Alexander his Father , by a Cardinall , as a thing happy , but verie persidious , the Pope said ; It was they , that had broke their Couenant first , in comming all together . 12. Pope Iulius the third , when hee was made Pope , gaue his Hat vnto a youth , a Fauourite of his , with great scandall . Wherupon , at one time a Cardinall , tha●… mought bee fre●… with him , said modestly to him ; What did your Holinesse see in that young man , to make him Cardinall ? Iulius answered , What did you see in mee , to make me Pope ? 13. The same Iulius , vpon like occasion of speech , why hee should beare so great affection to the same young Man , would say ; That he had found by Astrologie , that it was the youths Destinie , to be a Great Prelate ; which was impossible , except himselfe were Pope ; And therefore , that hee did raise him , as the Driuer on of his owne Fortune . 14 Sir Thomas Moore had onely Daughters , at the first ; And his Wife did euer pray for a Boy : At last hee had a Boy ; which after , at Mans yeeres , proued simple . Sir Thomas said to his Wife ; Thou prayedst so long for a Boy , that hee will bee a Boy , as long as he liues . 15. Sir Thomas Moore , the day he was beheaded , had a Barber sent to him , because his haire was long , which was thought , would make him more commiserable , with the people . The Barber came to him , and asked him ; Whether he would be pleased to bee trimm'd ? In good faith honest fellow , ( said Sir Thomas ) the King and I haue a suit for my Head , and till the Title be cleared , I will doe no cost vpon it . 16. Stephen Gardiner Bishop of Winchester , a great Champion of the Papists , was wont to say of the Protestants , who ground vpon the Scripture ; That they were like Poasts , that bring truth in their Letters , and lies in their Mouths . 17. The Lacedemonians were besieged by the Athenians , in the Fort of Peile ; which was won , and some slaine , and some taken . There was one said , to one of them that was taken , by way of scorne ; Wer●… not they braue men , tha●… lost their liues at th●… Fort of Peile ? He answered ; Certainely a Persian Arrow 〈◊〉 much to be set by , if it can chuse out a bra●… Man. 18. After the Defeat of Cyrus the younger , Falinus was sent , by the King , to the Grecians , ( who had , for their part , rather Victorie , than otherwise , ) to command them , to yeeld their Armes . Which when it was denied , Falinus said to Clearchus ; Well then , the King lets you know , that if you remoue from the place , where you are now encamped , it is warre ; if you stay , it is Truce ; What shall I say , you will doe ? Clearchus answered ; It pleaseth vs , as pleaseth the King. How is that ? saith Falinus . Saith Clearchus ; If we remoue , Warre ; if wee stay , Truce . And so would not disclose his purpose . 19. Clodius was acquit by a corrupt Iurie , that had palpably taken shares of money . Before they gaue vp their verdict , they prayed of the Senate a Guard , that they might doe their Consciences freely ; for Clodius was a verie seditious young Noble-man . Whereupon , all the world gaue him for condemn'd . But acquitted he was . Catulus the next day , seeing some of them , tha●… had acquitted him together , said to them ; What made yo●… to aske of vs a Guard Were you afraid you money should haue bee●… taken from you ? 20. At the same Iudgement , Cicero gaue i●… Euidence vpon oath And the Iurie ( which consisted of 57. ) passed against his Euidence . One day in the Senate , Cicero and Clodius being in altercation , Clodius vpbraided him , and said ; The Iurie gaue you no credit . Cicero answered ; Fiue and twentie gaue mee credit ; but there were two and thirtie , that gaue you no credit , for they had their money aforehand . 21. Many men , especially such as affect grauitie , haue a manner , after other mens speech , to shake their heads . Sir Lionell Cranfield would say ; That it was , as Men shake a Bottle , to see if there were any wit in their Head , or no. 22. Sir Thomas Moore , who was a man , in all his life time , that had an excellent ●…eine in jesting ) at ●…he verie instant of ●…s Death , hauing a ●…cttie long Beard , af●…er his Head was vpon the Blocke , lift it vp againe , and gently ●…rew his Beard aside , ●…nd said ; This hath ●…ot offended the King 23. Sir Thomas Moore had sent him , by a Suter in the Chancerie , two siluer Flagons . When they were presented by the Gentlemans seruant , he said to one of his Men ; Haue him to the Cellar and let him haue of my best wine . And turning to the Seruant said ; Tell thy Master Frend , if he like it , le●… him not spare it . 24. Diogenes hauing seene that the Kingdome of Macedon , which before was contemptible & low , began to come aloft , when hee died , was asked ; How he would be buried ? He answered ; With my face downeward ; for within a while , the world will bee turned vpside downe , and then I shall lie right . 25. Cato the Elder was wont to say ; That the Romans were like sheepe : A man were better driue a flocke of them , then one of them . 26. Themistocles , in his lower Fortune , was in loue with a young Gentle-man , who scorn'd him . When hee grew to his Greatnesse , which was soone after , hee sought to him : But Themistocles said ; Wee are both growne wise , but too late . 27. Demonax the Philosopher , when hee died , was asked touching his buriall . He answered , Neuer take care for burying mee , for stinke will burie me . He that askt him , said againe ; Why , would you haue your bodie left to Dogs and Rauens to feed vpon ? Demonax answered ; Why , what great hurt is it , if hauing sought to doe good , when I liued , to Men ; my bodie doe some good to beasts , when I am dead ? 28. Iack Roberts was desired by his Taylour , when the reckoning grew somewhat high , to haue a Bill of his hand . Roberts said ; I am content , but you must let no man know it . When the Taylor brought him the Bill , he tore●…t it , as in choller , and said to him ; You vse me not well ; you promised me no bodie should know it , and here you haue put in ; Be it knowne to all men by these presents . 29. When Lycurgus was to reforme and alter the state of Sparta , in the Consultation , one aduised , That it should bee reduced to an absolute Popular Equalitie . But Lycurgus said to him ; Sir , beginne it in your owne House . 30. Phocyon , the Athenian , ( a Man of great seueritie , and no wayes flexible to the will of the People ) one day , when hee spake to the People , in one part of his speech , was applauded : Whereupon , he turned to one of his Frends , and asked ; What haue I said amisse ? 31. Sir Walter Ralegh was wont to say , of the Ladies of Queene Elizabeths Priuie-Chamber , and Bed-Chamber ; That they were like Witches ; they could doe hurt , but they could doe no good . 32. Bion , that was an Atheist , was shewed in a Port-Citie , in a Temple of Neptune , many Tables or Pictures , of such , as had in tempests , made their vowes to Neptune , and were saued from shipwrack ; and was askt ; How say you now , doe you not acknowledge the power of the Gods ? But hee said ; Yes , but where are they painted , that haue beene drown'd after their vowes ? 33. Bias was sailing , and there fell out a great Tempest , and the Mariners , that were wicked and dissolute Fellowes , called vpon the Gods But Bias said to them ; Peace , let them not know yee are here . 34. Bion was wont to say ; That Socrates , of all the louers of Alcibiades , onely held him by the eares . 35. There was a Minister depriued for Inconformitie : who said to some of his Frends ; That if they depriued him , it should cost an hundred Mens liues . The Partie vnderstood it , as if , being a turbulent Fellow , hee would haue moued sedition , and complain'd of him . Whereupon , being conuented , and appo sed vpon that speech , he said ; His meaning was , that if hee lost his Benefice , hee would practise Physicke ; and then hee thought hee should kill an hundred Men , in time . 36. Michael Angelo , the famous Painter , painting in the Popes Chappell , the Portraiture of Hell , and damned Soules , made one of the damned Soules so like a Cardinall , that was his enemie , as euerie bodie , at first sight , knew it : Whereupon the Cardinall complained to Pope Clement , desiring it might be defaced ; who said to him ; Why , you know verie well , I haue power to deliuer a soule out of Purgatorie , but not out of Hell. 37. There was a Philosopher about Tiberius , that looking into the nature of Caius , said of him ; That hee was Mire mingled with Bloud . 38. Alcibiades came to Pericles , and stayed a while , ere hee was admitted . When he came in , Pericles ciuilly excused it , and said ; I was studying , how to giue my account . But Alcibiades said to him ; If you will be ruled by mee , studie rather , how to giue no account . 39. Cicero was at dinner , where there was an ancient Ladie , that spake of her yeeres , and said ; She was but fortie yeeres old . One that sate by Cicero , rounded him in the care , and said ; Shee talkes of fortie yeeres old , and shee is farre more , out of question Cicero answered him againe ; I must beleeue her , for I haue heard her say so , any time , these ten yeeres . 40. Pope Adrian the sixth wastalking with the Duke of Sesa , That Pasquill gaue great scandall , and that hee would haue him throwen into the riuer . But Sesa answered ; Doe it not ( holy Father ) for then hee will turne Frogge ; and whereas now hee chaunts but by day , hee will then chaunt both by day and night . 41. There was a Souldier , that vaunted before Iulius Caesar , of hurts he had receiued in his face . Iulius Caesar knowing him bee a Coward , told him ; You were best take beed , next time you r●…nne away , how you looke backe . 42. There was a Bishop , that was somewhat a delicate Person , and bathed twice a day . A Frend of his said to him ; My Lord , why doe you bath twice a day ? The Bishop answered ; Because I cannot conueniently bath thrice . 43. Mendoza , that was Vice-Roy of Peru , was wont to say ; That the Gouernment of Peru , was the best place that the King of Spaine gaue , saue that it was somewhat too neere Madrid . 44. Secretarie Bournes sonne kept a Gentlemans Wife in Shropshire , who liued from her Husband with him . When hee was wearie of her , he caused her Husband to be dealt with , to take her home , and offered him 500. pounds for reparation . The Gentle-man went to Sir Henry Sidney , to take his aduice vpon this offer ; telling him ; That his wife promised now a new life ; and to tell him truth , 500. pounds would come well with him ; and besides , that sometimes he wanted a woman in his bed . By my troth , ( said Sir Henry Sidney ) take her home , and take the money , and then , wheras other Cuckolds weare their hornes plaine , you may weare yours gilt . 45. There was a Gentle-man in Italy , that wrate to a great Frend of his , vpon his Aduancement to bee Cardinall ; That hee was verie glad of his aduancement , for the Cardinalls owne sake : but he was sorrie , that himselfe had lost so good a Frend. 46. When Rablais lay on his Death bed , and they gaue him the Extreme Vnction , a familiar Frend of his came to him afterwards , and asked him ; How hee did ? Rablais answered ; Euen going my journey , they haue greased my boots already . 47. There was a King of Hungarie tooke a Bishop in battell , and kept him prisoner . Whereupon the Pope writ a Monitorie to him , for that hee had brokē the Priuiledge of Holy Church , and taken his Sonne . The King sent an Embassage to him , and sen●… withall the Armour , wherein the Bishop was taken , and this onely in writing Vide , num haec sit vestis filij t●… ? 48. There was a Sutour to Vespasian , who to lay his Sute fairer , said ; It was for his Brother : whereas indeed it was for a peece of money . Some about Vespasian , to crosse him , told the Emperour , That the Partie , his Seruant spake for , was not his Brother , but that it was vpon a bargaine . Vespasian se●…t for the Partie interessed , and asked him ; Whether his Meane was his Brother , or no ? He durst not tell vntruth to the Emperour , and confessed ; That he●… was not his Brother Whereupon , the Emperour said ; This doe fetch me the money , and you shall haue your sut●… dispatched . Which h●… did . The Courtier which was the. Meane , sollicited Vespasian , soone after , about his Sute : Why ( saith Vespasian ) I gaue it , last day , to a Brother of mine . 49. When Vespasian passed from Iurie , to take vpon him the Empire , hee went by Alexandria , where remained two famous Philosophers , Apollonius , & Euphrates . The Emperour heard them discourse , touching matter of State , in the presence of many . And when hee was wearie of them , hee brake off , and in a secret derision , finding their Discourses but Speculatiue , and not to be●… put in practise , said ; Oh , that I might gouerne wise men , and wise men gouerne me . 50. Cardinall Ximenes , vpon a muster which was taken against the Moores , was spoken to by a Seruant of his , to stand a little out of the smoake of the Harquebuze : But he said againe ; That that was his Incense . 51. Vespasian askt of Apollonius ; What was the cause of Nero's ruine ? who answered ; Nero could tune the Harpe well ; but in Gouernment , hee did alwayes winde vp the strings too high , or let them downe too low . 52. Mr. Bromley Sollicitour , giuing in Euidence for a Deed which was impeached to bee fraudulent , was vrged by the Counsell on the other side , with this presumption : That in two former suites , when Title was made , that Deed was passed ouer in silence , and some other Conueyance stood vpon . Mr. Iustice Catyline , taking in with that side , asked the Sollicitour ; I pray thee , Mr. Sollicitour , let mee aske you a familiar question : I haue two Geldings in my stable , and I haue diuerse times businesse of importance , and still I send forth one of my Geldings , and not the other ; would you not thinke I set him aside for a Iade ? No , my Lord , ( saith Bromley ) I would thinke you spared him for your owne saddle . 53. Alonso Cartillio was informed by his Steward , of the greatnesse of his expence , being such as hee could not hold out with . The Bishop asked him ; Wherein it chiefly rose ? His Steward told him ; In the multitude of his seruants . The Bishop bade him make a note of those that were necessarie , and those that mought be put off . Which hee did . And the Bishop taking occasion to reade it , before most of his seruants , said to his Steward ; Well , let these remaine , because I need them ; and these other , because they need mee . 54. Queene Elizabeth was wont to say vpon the Commission of Sales ; That the Commissioners vsed her like strawberrie wiues , that laid two or threo great strawberries at the mouth of their pot , and all the rest were little ones : So they made her two or three good prices of the first particulars , but fell straight-wayes . 55. Queene Elizabeth was wont to say of her instructions to great Officers ; That they were like to garments , straight at the first putting on , but did by and by weare loose enough . 56. Mr. Marburie the Preacher would say ; That God was faine to deale with wicked men , as men do with frisking jades in a pasture , that cannot take them vp , till they get them at a gate : So wicked men will not bee taken vp , till the boure of death . 57. Thales , as he lookt vpon the starres , fell into the water : Whereupon , it was after said ; That if hee had lookt into the water , he might haue seene the starres ; but looking vp to the starres , hee could not see the water . 58. The Booke of Deposing Richard the second , and the comming in of Henrie the fourth , supposed to bee written by Dr. Hayward , who was committed to the Tower for it , had much incensed Q. Elizabeth . And she asked Mr. Bacon , being then of her learned Counsell ; Whether there were no treason contained in it ? Mr. Bacon intending to doe him a pleasure , and to take off the Queenes bitternesse with a jest , answered ; No Madam , for treason , I cannot deliuer opinion , that there is any , but verie much felonie . The Queene apprehending it gladly , asked ; How , and wherein ? Mr. Bacon answered ; Because he had stollen many of his sentences and conceits , out of Cornelius Tacitus . 59. Mr. Popham , when hee was Speaker , and the Lower House had sate long , and done in effect nothing ; comming one day to Queene Elizabeth , she said to him ; Now , Mr. Speaker , what hath passed in the Lower House ? He answered ; If it please your Maiestie , seuen weekes . 60. Pope Xystus the fifth , who was a pooremansson , & his fathers house ill-thatched , so that the Sunne came in , in many places , would sport with his ignobilitie , & say ; He was , Nato di Casa illustre : Sonne of an illustrious House . 61. When the King of Spaine conquered Portugall , hee gaue speciall charge to his Lieutenant , that the Souldiers should not spoile , lest hee should alienate the hearts of the people . The Armie also suffered much scarsitie of victuall . Whereupon , the Spanish Souldiers would afterwards say : That they had won the King a Kingdome , ●…s the Kingdome of Heauen vseth to bee wonne ; 〈◊〉 fasting , and abstainning from tha●… , that is another mans . 62. Cicero married his Daughter to Dolabella ; th●… hold Caesars pattie : Pompey had married Iulia , ●…at wa●… Caesars Daughter . After , whē Caesar and Pompey tooke Armes one against the other ; and Pompey had passed the seas , and Caesar possessed Italy , Cicero stay'd somewhat long in Italy , but at last sailed ouer to ioyne with Pompey : who when hee came vnto him , Pompey said ; You are welcome ; but where left you your Sonne in Law ? Cicero answered ; With your Father in law . 63. Nero was wont to say of his Master Seneca ; That his stile was like mortar of sand without lime . 64. Sir Henrie Wotton vsed to say ; That Critticks are like Brushers of Noble-mens cloaths . 65. Queene Elizabeth , being to resolue vpon a great Officer , and being by some , that canuassed for others , put in some doubt of that person , whō she meant to aduance , called for Mr. Bacon , and told him ; Shee was like one with a lanthorne , seeking a man : and seemed vnsarisfied , in the choyce she had of men for that place . Mr. Bacon answered her ; That hee had heard , that in old time , there was vsually painted on the Church walls , the Day of Doome , and God sitting in judgement , and Saint Michael by him , with apaire , of ballance , and the soule , and the good deeds in the one ballance , and the faults and the euill deeds in the other ; and the soules ballance went vp farre too light : Then was our Ladie painted with a great paire of beads , casting them into the light ballance , to make vp the weight : So ( hee said ) place and authoritie , which were in her hands to giue , were like our Ladies beads , which though Men , through diuerse imperfections , were too light before , yet when they were cast in , made weight competent . 66. Mr. Sauill was asked , by my Lo. of Essex , his opinion touching Poets ; who answered my Lo. He thought them the best writers , next to those that write prose . 67. Mr. Mason of Trinitie Colledge , sent his Pupill to another of the Fellowes , to borrow a booke of him : who told him ; I am loth to lend my bookes out of my chamber ; but if it please thy Tutour , to come and reade vpon it in my chamber , hee shall , as long as he will. It was Winter : and some dayes after , the same Fellow sent to Mr. ●…son , to borrow his bellowes . But Mr. Mason said to his Pupill ; I am loth to lend my bellowes out of my chamber ; but if thy Tutor would come , and blow the fire in my chamber , hee shall , as long as he will. 68. Nero did cut a youth , as if he would haue transformed him into a woman , & call'd him Wife . There was a Senator of Rome , that said secretly to his Frend ; It was pittie Nero's father had not such a wife . 69. Galba succeeded Nero , and his age being much despised , there was much licence and confusion in Rome . Whereupon , a Senatour said in full Senate ; It were better liue where nothing is lawfull , then where all things are lawfull . 70. In Flaunders , by accident , a Flemmish Tiler , fell from the top of a house vpon a Spaniard , and killed him , though he escaped himselfe . The next of the bloud prosecuted his death with great violence against the Tiler . And when hee was offered pecuniarie recompence , nothing would serue him , but Lex Talionis . Whereupon the Iudge said to him ; That if hee did vrge that kinde of sentence , it must bee , that hee should goe vp to the top of the house , and thence fall downe vpon the Tiler . 71. Queene Elizabeth was dilatorie enough in sutes , of her owne nature : And the Lo. Threasurer Burleigh , to feed her humour , would say to her ; Madam , you doe well to let Suters stay ; for I shall tell you , Bis dat , qui citò dat ; If you grant them speedily , they will come againe the sooner . 72. They faigne a tale of Sixtus Quintus , that after his death he went to Hell ; And the Porter of Hell said to him ; You haue some reason to offer your selfe to this place ; but yet I haue order not to receiue you : you haue a place of your owne , Purgatorie , you may goe thither . So he went away , & sought Purgatorie a great while , & could finde no such place . Vpon that hee tooke heart , and went to Heau●… and knocked , and 〈◊〉 Peter asked ; Who w●… there ? He said ; Sixtus Pope . Whereunto St. Peter said ; Why doe you knocke ? you haue the keyes . Sixtus answered ; It is true , but it is so long since they were giuen , as I doubt the wards of the locke be altred . 73. Charles King of Swede , a great enemie of the Iesuites , when hee tooke any of their Colledges , he would hang the old Iesuites , and put the young to his Mines , saying ; That since they wrought so hard aboue ground , he would trie how they could worke vnderground . 74. In Chancerie , one time , when the Counsell of the Parties set forth the Bundaries of the land in question , by the Plot : And the Counsell of oue part sayd ; Wee lie on this side , my Lo. And the Counsell on the other part said ; Wee lie on this side : The Lo. Chanceller Hatton stood vp , and said ; If you lie on both sides , whom will you haue mee to beleeue ? 75. Vespasian , and Titus his eldest Sonne , were both absent from Rome , when the Empire was cast vpon him . Domitian his younger Sonne was at Rome , who tooke vpon him the Affaires : And being of a turbulent spirit , made many changes , and displaced diuerse Officers , and Gouernours of Prouinces , sending them Successours : So when Vespasian came to Rome , and Domitian came into his presence , Vespasian said to him ; Sonne , I looked when you would haue sent me a Successour . 76. Sir Amice Pawlet , when hee saw too much haste made in any matter , was wont to say ; Stay a while , that wee may make an end the sooner . 77. The Deputies of the reformed Religion , after the Massacre , which was vpon St. Bartholomewes day , treated with the King and Queene-Mother , and some other of the Counsell , for a peace . Both sides were agreed vpon the Articles . The Question was , vpon the securitie of performance . After some particulars propounded and reiected , the Queene-Mother said ; Why , is not the word of a King sufficient securitie ? One of the Deputies answered ; No , by St. Bartholomew , Madam . 78. When the Arch-Duke did raise his siege from Graue , the then Secretarie came to Queene Elizabeth ; and the Queene hauing intelligence first , said to the Secretarie ; Wote you what ? The Arch-Duke is risen from the Graue . Hee answered ; What without the Trumpet of the Archangell ? The Queene replyed ; Yes , without sound of Trumpet . 79. Francis the first , vsed for his pleasure , sometimes to goe disguised . So walking one day , in the companie of the Cardinall of Borbon , neere Paris , hee met a Peasant , with a new paire of shooes vpon his arme . So hee call'd him to him , and said ; By our Ladie , these bee good shooes , what did they cost thee ? The Peasant said ; Guesse . The King said ; I thinke some fiue Souls . Saith the Peasant ; You haue lied but a Carolois . What Villaine ( saith the Cardinall of Burbon ) thou art dead : It is the King. The Peasant replyed ; The Deuill take him , of you and mee , that knew so much . 80. There was a conspiracie against the Emperour Claudius , by Scribonianus , examined in the Senate ; where Claudius sa●… in his chaire , and one of his Freed-Seruants stood at the backe of his chaire . In the examination , that Freed Seruant , who had much power with Claudius , verie saucily had almost all the words ; and amongst other things , he asked in scorne , one of the Examinats , who was likewise Freed Seruant of Scribonianus ; I pray , Sir , if Scribonianus had beene Emperour , what would you haue done ? Hee answered ; I would haue stood behinde his chaire , and held my peace . 81. Dionysius the Tyrant , after he was deposed , and brought to Corinth , kept a schoole . Many vsed to visit him , and amongst others , one , when hee came in , opened his mantle , and shooke his cloathes , thinking to giue Dionysius a gentle scorne ; because it was the manner to doe so , for them that came in to him , while he was Tyrant . But Dionysius said to him ; I pray thee doe so rather when thou goest out , that wee may see thou stealest nothing away . 82. Hannibal said of Fabius Maximus , and of Marcellus ( whereof the Former waited vpon him , that hee could make no progresse ; and the Latter had many sharpe fights with him ; ) That he feared Fabius , like a Tutour ; and Marcellus , like an Enemie . 83. Diogenes , one terrible frostie morning , came into the Market Place , and stood naked quaking , to shew his Tollerancie . Many of the people came about him , pittying him . Plato passing by , and knowing hee did it to be seene , said to the people , as hee went by ; If you pittie him indeed , leaue him alone . 84. Sackford , Master of the Requests to Queen Elizabeth , had diuerse times moued for audience , & been put off . At last hee came to the Queene in a progresse , and had on a new paire of boots . When hee came in , the Queene said to him ; Fie Slouen , thy new Boots stinke . Madam , ( said he ) it is not my new Boots that stinke , but it is the stale Bills that I haue kept so long . 85. One was saying ; That his great Grandfather , and Grand father , and Father , died at sea . Said another that heard him ; And I were as you , I would neuer come at Sea. Why ( saith hee ) where did your great Grand-father , & Grand-father , and Father die ? Hee answered ; Where , but in their Beds ? Saith the other ; And I were as you , I would ●…er come in Bed. 86. Arist ppus was 〈◊〉 Suiter to Dionysius , for somewhat , who would giue no eare to his Suit. Aristippus fell at his feet : Then Dionysius gra ted it . One that stood by , said afterwards to Aristippus ; You a Philosopher , and to bee sabase , as to throw your selfe at the Tyrants feet , to get a Suit ? Aristippus answered ; The fault is not mine , but the fault is in Dionysius , that carries his cares in his feet . 87. There was a young man in Rome , that was verie like Augustus Caesar Augustus tooke knowledge of it , and ●…enr for the Man , and asked him ; Was your Mother neuer at Rome ? Hee answered ; No , Sir , but my Father was . 88. A Physician aduised his Patient , that had sore eyes , that hee should abstaine from wine . But the Patient said ; I thinke rather , Sir , from wine and water ; for I haue aften marked it ; in bleare eyes , and I haue seene water come forth , but neuer wine . 89. When Sir Thomas Moore was Lo. Chanceller , hee did vse , at Masse , to sit in the Chancell ; and his Ladie in a Pew . And because the Pew stood out of sight , his Gentleman-Vsher , euer after Seruice , came to the Ladies Pew , and said ; Madam , my Lo. is gone . So when the Chancellers place was taken from him , the next time they went to Church , Sir Thomas himselfe came to his Ladies Pew , and said ; Madam , my Lo. is gone . 90. At an Act of the Commencement , the Answerer gaue for his Question ; That an Aristoaracie was better then a Monarchie . The Replyer , who was a dissolute Fellow , did tax him ; That being a priuate bred Man , bee would giue a Question of State. The Answerer said ; That the Replyer did much wrong the priuiledg●… of Seh●…ers ; who would bee much 〈◊〉 if they should giue Questions of nothing , but such things wherein they are practised . And added ; Wee haue heard your selfe dispute of vertue , which no man will say , you put much its practise . 91. There was a dispute , whether great heads or little heads had the better wit ? And one said ; It must needs be the little . For it is a Maxime : Omne maius continet in se minus . 92. Solon , when hee wept for his Sonnes death , and one said to him ; Weeping will not helpe : answered , A●…s , therfore I weepe , because weeping will not helpe . 93. Solon being asked ; Whether bee had giuen the Athenians the best Lawes ? answered ; Yes , the best of those that they would haue receiued . 94. One said to Aristippus ; It is a strange thing , why should men rather giue to the poore , then to Philosophers . Hee ansvvered ; Because , they thinke themselues may sooner come to bee poore , then to be Philosophers . 95. Alexander vsed to say of his two Frends , Craterus and Hephestion ; That Hephestion loued Alexander , and Craterus loued the King. 96. It fell out so , that as Liuia went abroad in Rome , there met her naked young Men , that were sporting in the streets : Which Augustus was about seuerely to punish in them : But Liuia spake for them , and said ; It was no more to chaste women , then so many Statua's . 97. Alonso of Aragon was wont to say , in commendation of Age , that Age appeared to be best in ●…oure things ; Old wood best to burne ; Old wine to drinke ; Old Frends to trust ; and Old Authors to reade . 98. It was said of Augustus , & afterwards the like was said of Septimius Seuerus : Both which did infinite mischiefe in their beginnings , and infinite good towards their ends ; That they should either neuer haue beene borne , or neuer died . 99. Queene Isabell of Spaine would say ; Whosoeuer hath a good presence , and a good fashion , carries Letters of Recommendation . 100. Traian would say of the vaine jelousie of Princes , that seeke to make away those that aspire to their Succession ; That there was neuer King , that did put to death his Successour . 101. When it was represented to Alexander , to the aduantage of Antipater , who vvas a sterne and imperious Man , that hee onely of all his Lieutenants , vvore no Purple , but kept the Macedonian Habit of Blacke , Alexander said ; Yes , but Antipater is all Purple within . 102. Constantine the Great , in a kinde of ●…nuie , himselfe being a great Builder , as Traian likewise was , would call Traian , Wall-flower , because his name was vpon so many walls . 103. Philip of Macedon was wished to banish one , for speaking ill of him : But Philip said ; Better he speake where wee are both knowne , then where we are both vnknowne . 104. A Grecian Captaine aduising the Confederares , that were vnited against the L●…demonians , touching their Enterprise , gaue opinion , that they should goe directly vpon Sparta , saying ; That the state of Sparta was like Riuers ; strong when they had runne a great way , and weake towards their Head. 105. Alonso of Aragon was wont to say of himselfe ; That he was a great Necromancer , for that he vsed to aske Counsell of the Dead : meaning Books . 106. I ●…llus entertained Pompey , in one of ●…is magnificent house : Pompey said ; This is a maruellous faire and stately house for the Summer , but , 〈◊〉 thinkes , it should be 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 for the Winters Lugullus answered ; Doe you not thinks me as wise as diuerse Fowle are , to remoue with the season ? 107. Plato entertained some of his Frends at a Dinner , and had in the Chamber , a Bed or Couch , nearly and costly furnished . Diogenes came in , and got vp vpon the Bed , and trampled vpon it , and said ; I trample vpon the pride of Plato . Plato mildly answered ; But with greater pride . 108. One was examined , vpon certaine scandalous words spoken against the King. He confessed them , and said ; It is true , I spake them , and if the wine had not failed , I had said much more . 109. Pompey being Commissioner , for sending graine to Rome , in time of Dearth , when hee came to the sea , hee found it verie tempestuous & dangerous ; Insomuch as those about him , aduised him by no meanes to embarque . But Pompey said ; It is of necessitie that I goe , not that I liue . 110. Traian would say , That the Kings Exchecquer was like the Spleene ; for when that did swell , the whole Bodie did pine . 111. Charles the Bauld allowed one , whose name was Scottus , to sit at the Table with him , for his pleasure Scottus sate on the other side of the Table . One time the King being merrie with him , said to him ; What is there betweene Scot and Sot ? Scottus answered ; The table onely . 112. Ethelwold , Bishop of Winchester , in a famine , sold all the rich Vessells and Ornaments of the Church , to releeue the poore with bread : and said ; There was no reason , that the dead Temples of God should be sumptuously furnished , and the liuing Temples suffer penurie . 113. There was a Marriage made betweene a Widow of great wealth , and a Gentleman of great House , that had no estate or meanes . Iack Roberts said ; That Marriage was like a blacke pudding ; the one brought Blo'd , and the other brought Sewet and Oatmcale . 114. Demosthenes was vpbraided by Aeschines , that his speeches did smell of the Lampe . But Demosthenes said ; Indeed there is a great difference , betweene that that you and I doe by Lampe-light . 115. Demades the Oratour , in his age was talkatiue , and would eat hard . An●…ipater would say of him ; That he was like a Sacrifice , that nothing was left of it , but the Tongue & the Paunch . 116. When King Edward the second was amongst his Torturers , who hurried him too and fro , that no man should know where hee was , they set him down vpon a Banke ; And one time the more to disguise his face , shaued him , and washed him , with cold water of a ditch by : The King sayd ; Well yet , I will haue warme water for my Beard . And so shed abundance of Teares . 117 The Turke made an Expedition into Persia , and because of the strait jawes of the Mountaines of Armenia , the Basha's consulted which way they should get in . Saies a naturall Foole that stood by : Here 's much adoe how you should get in , but I heare no Bodie take care , how you should get out . 118. Sir Thomas Moore , when the Counsell of the Partie pressed him for a longer day , said ; Take St. Barnabies day , which is the longest day in the yeere . Now St. Barnabies day was within few dayes following . 119. One of the Fathers saith ; That there is but this difference betweene the death of old men and young men ; that old men goe to death , and death comes to young Men. 120. Philo Iudaeus saith ; That the Sense is like the Sun : Far the Sun seales vp the Globe of Heauen , and opens the Globe of Earth : So the Sense doth obscure heauenly things , & reueale earthly things . 121. Cassius , after the defeat of Crassus , by the Parthians , whose weapons were chiefly Arrowes , , fled to the Citie of ●…rras , where he durst not stay any 〈◊〉 , doubting to be pursued , & besieged . 〈◊〉 had with him an Astrologer , who said to him ; Sir , I would not haue you goe hence , while the Moone is in the signe of Scorpic . Cassius answered ; I am more afraid , of that of Sagittarie . 122. Alexander , after the Battell of Gramcum , had very great Offers made him by Darius . Consulting with his Captaines , cōcerning them , Parmenio said ; Sure , I would accept of these offers , if I were as Alexander . Alexander answered ; So would I , if I were as Parmenio . 123. Alexander was wont to say ; Hee knew he was mortall by two things , Sleepe , and Lust. 124. Augustus Caesar was inuited to supper , by one of his old Frends , that had conuersed with him , in his lesse Fortunes , and had but ordinarie entertainment . Whereupon , at his going , he said ; I did not know , that you and I were so familiar . 125. Augustus Caesar would say ; That hee wondred , that Alexander feared hee should want worke , hauing no more to conquer : As if it were not as hard a matterto keep , as to conquer . 126. Antigonus , when it was told him , that the enemie had such volleyes of arrowes , that they did hide the Sunne , said ; That falls out well , for it is hot wether , and wee shall fight in the shade . 127. Augustus Caesar 〈◊〉 write to Liuia , who was ouer-sensible of some ill words that had been spoken of them both ; Let it not trouble you , my Liuia , if any man speake ill of vs , for wee haue enough , that no man can doe ill vnto vs. 128. Chilon said ; That Kings Frends and Fauourites were like Casting Counters , that sometimes stood for one , sometimes for ten , sometimes for a hundred . 129. Theodosius , when hee was pressed by a Sutour , and denied him , the Sutour said ; Why , Sir , you promised it . Hee answered ; I said it , but I did not promise it , if it be vniust . 130. Agathocles , after he had takē Syracusa , the men whereof , during the Siege , had in a brauerie , spoken of him all the villanie that mought be , sold the Syracusans for slaues , and said ; Now if you vse such words of mee , I will tell your Masters of you . 131. Dionysius the Elder , when he saw his Son , in many things 〈◊〉 inordinate , said to him ; Did you ever know mee 〈◊〉 such things 〈◊〉 His Sonn●… answered , No , but you had not a Tyrant to your Father : The Father replyed ; No , 〈◊〉 you , if you take these courses , will haue 〈◊〉 Tyrant to your Son. 132. Callisthenes the Philosopher , that followed Alexanders Court , and hated the King , was askt by one ; How one should 〈◊〉 the famousest 〈◊〉 in the world ? And answered ; By taking away him that is . 133. Sir Edward Coke was wont to say , when a great Man came to Dinner to him , and gaue him no knowledge of his comming ; Well , since you sent me no word of your comming , you shall dine with mee but if I had knowne of your cōming , I would haue dined with you . 134. The Romans , when they spake to the people , were wont to call them ; Yee Romans . When Commanders in War spake to their Armie , they , called them ; My Souldiers . There was a Mucinie in Caesars Armie , and somewhat the Souldiers would haue had , but they would not declare themselues in it : Onely they demanded , a Dimission or discharge , though with no intention it should bee granted : But knowing that Caesar had , at that time , great need of their seruice , thought by that meanes , to wrench him to their other desires . Whereupon , with one try , they asked Dimission . But Caesar , after silence made , said ; I , for my 〈◊〉 , yee Romans : which admitied thē 〈◊〉 bee dismissed : Which voice they had no sooner heard , but they mutined againe , 〈◊〉 would not suffer 〈◊〉 to goe on , vntill 〈◊〉 had called them by the name of Souldiers . And so , with 〈◊〉 word , 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 the 〈◊〉 . 135. Caesar would say of Sylla , for that hee did resigne his Dictatourship ; That hee was ignorant of letters , he could not dictate . 136. Seneca said of Caesar ; That he did quickly sheath the sword , but neuer laid it off . 137. Diogenes begging as diuerse Philosophers then vsed , did beg more of a prodi●…ll man , then of the test that were present : Whereupon one said 〈◊〉 him ; See your basenesse , that when you ●…de a liberall minde , you will take most of . No , ( said Diogenes ) but I meane to beg of the rest againe . 138. Iason the Thessalian was wont to say ; That some things must be done vniustly , that many things may bee done iustly . 139. Sir Nicholas Bacon being Keeper of the Seale , when Queene Elizabeth , in progresse , came to his house at Redgraue , and said to him ; My Lo. what a little house haue you gotten ? said , Madam , my house is well , but it is you that 〈◊〉 made me too great 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 house . 140. ●…mistocles , when 〈◊〉 Embassador from 〈◊〉 meane State did 〈◊〉 great matters , 〈◊〉 to him ; Frend , 〈◊〉 words would re●… a Citie . 141. Agesilaus , when one told him there was one did excellently counterfet a Nightingale , and would haue had him heare him , said ; Why , I haue heard the Nightingale her selfe . 142. A great Nobleman , vpon the complaint of a Seruant of his , layd a Citizen by the heeles , thinking to bend him to his Seruants desire . But the Fellow being stubborne , the Seruant came to his Lo. and told him ; Your ●…op. I know , hath gone as farre as well you may , but it workes not , for yonder Fellow is more peruerse then before . Said my Lo Let 's forget him a while , and then he will remember himselfe . 143. One came to a Cardinall in Rome , and told him ; That he had brought his Lop. a daintie white Palfrey , but he fell lame by the way . Saith the Cardinall to him ; ●…e tell thee what thou shalt doe ; Goe to such a Cardinall , and such a Cardinall , ( naming him some halfe a dozen Cardinalls ) and tell them as much ; And so , whereas by thy horse , if hee had beene found , thou couldst haue pleased but one , with thy lame borsethou maiest please halfe a dozen . 144. Iphicrates the Athenian , in a Treatie that he had with the Lacedemonians for peace , in which questiō was about securitie for obseruing the same , said ; The Athenians would not accept of any Securitie , except the Lacedemonians did yeeld vp vnto them those things , whereby it mought bee manifest , that they could not hurt them , if they would . 145. Euripides would say of persons that were beautifull , and yet in some yeeres ; In faire bodies , not onely the Spring is pleasant , but also the Autumne . 146. After a great fight , there came to the Campe of Consaluo the great Captaine , a Gentle-man proudly horsed and armed . Diego de Mendoza askt the great Captaine ; Who 's this ? Who answered ; It is St Ermin , that neuer appeares , but after a storme . 147. There was a Captaine sent to an Exploit by his Generall , with Forces that were not likely to atchieue the Enterprise . The Captaine said to him ; Sir , appoint but halfe so many . Why ? ( saith the Generall . ) The Captaine answered ; Because it is better fewer die then more . 148. They would say of the Duke of Guise Henrie , that had sold and oppignerated all his Patrimonie , to suffice the great Donan̄ues that hee had made ; That hee was the greatest Vsurer of France , because all his 〈◊〉 was in obligations . 149. Croesus said to Cambyses ; That Peace was better then warre ; because in peace the Sonnes did burie their Fathers , but in warres , the Fathers did burie their Sonnes . 150. There was an Harbinger had lodged a Gentle-man in a verie ill roome , who expostulated with him somewhat rudely ; But the Harbinger carelesly sayd ; You will take pleasure in it , when you are out of it . 151. There was a curst ●…age , that his Master ●…hipt naked : And when hee had beene ●…hipt , would not put on his Cloaths : And when his Master hade him , said to him ; ●…ake them you , for they are the Hangmans fees . 152. There was one that died greatly in debt . When it was reported in some companie , where diuerse of his Creditors were , that hee was dead , one began to say ; In good faith , then hee hath carried 500. Duckets of mine , with him , into the other world . And another of them said ; And 200. of mine . And some others spake of seuerall summes of theirs . Whereupon , one that was amongst them , said ; Well , I see how , that though a man ●…not carrie any of his ●…wne with him into the 〈◊〉 world , yet he may carrie other mens . 153. Francis Caruajall , that was the great Captaine of the Rebells of Peru , had often giuen the chace to Diego Centeno , a principall Commander of the Emperours partie . He was afterwards taken by the Emperours Licutenant Gasca , and committed to the custodie of Diego Centeno , who vsed him with all possible curtesie ; Insomuch as Caruajall askt him ; I pray , Sir , who are you , that vse mee with this curtefie ? Centeno said ; Doe you not know Diego Centeno ? ●…uajall answered ; 〈◊〉 good faith , Sir , I ●…ue beene so vsed to 〈◊〉 your backe , as I ●…ew not your face . 154. Caruajall , when he was drawne to exe●…tion , being foure●…ore and fiue yeeres old , and layd vpon the Hurdle , sayd ; What ? young in cradle , old in cradle ? 155. There is a Spanish Adage ; Loue without end , hath no end : Meaning , that if it were begun , not vpon particular ends , it would last . 156. Cato the Elder , being aged , buried his Wife , and married a young woman . His Sonne came to him , and said ; Sir , what haue I offended you , that you haue brought Step mother into your 〈◊〉 ? The old Man answered ; N●…y , quite ●…ntrarie , Sonne , thou ●…easest me so well , as I would be glad to haue more such . 157. Crassus the Oratour had a Fish , which the Romans call'd Murena , that hee had made verie tame , and fond of him . The Fish died , and Crassus wept for it . One day falling in contention with Domitius in the Senate , Domitius said ; Foolish Crassus , you wept for your Murena . Crassus replied ; That 's more then you did for both your wiues . 158. Philip , Alexanders Father , gaue Sentence against a Prisoner , what time hee was drowsie , and seemed 〈◊〉 giue small attenti●… ; The Prisoner , ●…er sentēce was pro●…unced , said ; I ap●…ale . The King somewhat stirred , sayd ; 〈◊〉 whom doe you ap●…ale ? The Prisoner answered ; From Philip when hee gaue no ●…are , to Philip when he shall giue care . 159. The same Philip maintained Argument with a Musician , in points of his Art , somewhat peremptorily . But the Musician said to him ; God forbid , Sir , your Fortune were so hard , that you should know these things better then I. 160. There was a Philosopher that disputed with Adrian the Emperour , and did it but weakely . One of his Frends that had beene by , after wards 〈◊〉 to him ; Mee thinkes you were no●… like your selfe , last day , in Argument with the Emperour , I could haue ●…swered better my selfe . Why , sayd the Philosopher , would you haue mee contend 〈◊〉 him that 161. Diogenes was asked in a kinde of scorne ; What was the matter , that Philosophers haunted rich men , and not rich men Philosophers ? He ansvvered ; Because the one knew what they wanted , the other did not . 162. Demetrius King of Macedon , had a petition offered him diucrse times by an old Woman , and still answered ; Hee had no ●…sure . Whereupon , the woman said aloud ; Why then giue ouer to be King. 163. The same Demetrius would , at times , r●…ro himselfe from businesse , and giue himselfe wholly to pleasures . One day of those his retirings , giuing out that he was sicke , his Father Antigonus came , on the suddaine , to visit him , and met a faire daintie youth comming out of his Chamber , When Antigonus came in , Demetrius said ; Sir , the feauer left me right now . Antigonus replyed ; I thinke it was hee that I met at the doore . 164. There was a Mer●… farre in debt that died . His goods 〈◊〉 houshold stuffe 〈◊〉 set forth to sale . 〈◊〉 was one that 〈◊〉 onely a pillow , and said ; This pillow sure is good to 〈◊〉 vpon , since bee could sleepe that owed 〈◊〉 many debts . 165. A Louer met his Lady in a close chaire , shee thinking to goe vnknowne . He came and spake to her . She askt him ; How did you know me ? He said ; Because my wounds bled afresh . Alluding to the commen tradition , That the wounds of a bodie slaine , in the presence of him that kill'd him , will bleed afresh . 166. A Gentle-man brought Musicke to his Ladies window , who hated him , and had warned him oft away : And when he persisted , shee threw stones at him . Whereupon , a Frend of his , that was in his companie , sayd to him ; What greater honour can you haue to your Musicke , then that stones come about you , as they did to Orpheus ? 167. Cato Maior would say . ; That wise men learned more by Fooles , then Fooles by wise men . 168. When it was sayd to Anaxagoras ; The Athenians haue condemned you to die . He said againe ; And Nature them . 169. Demosthenes , whē 〈◊〉 from the Bat●… , and that it wasre●…proached to him , 〈◊〉 ; That hee that 〈◊〉 mought fight againe . 170. Antalcidas , when an Athenian said to him ; Ye Spartans are ●…learned : said againe ; True , for wee , haue learned , no euill , nor vice , of you . 171. Alexander , when his Father wished him , to runne , for the prize of the Race , at the Olympiā Games , ( for hee was very swift ) said ; He would , if he might runne with Kings . 172. When Alexander passed into Asia , hee gaue large Donatiues , to his Captains , and other principall Men of Vertue : In 〈◊〉 much , as Parmenio 〈◊〉 him ; Sir , what doe you keepe , for your selfe ? Hee answered ; Hope . 173. Antigonus vsed oft ●…goe disguised , and listen at the Tents of his Souldiers : And at a time , heard some that spoke , very ill of him . Whereupon , he opened the Tent a little , and said to them If you will speake ill of mee , you should goe a little further off . 174. Vespasian set a Tribute vpon Vrine . Titus his Sonne , emboldned himselfe ; to speake to his Father of it ; and represented it , as a thing indigne , and sordid . Vespasian said nothing for the time ; but a while after , when it was forgotten , sent for a piece of Siluer , out of the Tribute Money , and called to his Sonne , ●…ding him smell to it ; and asked him ; Whether he found any offence ? Who said ; No. Why loe ( saith Vespasran againe ) and yet thir comes out of Vrine . 175. There were two Gentlemen , otherwise of equall degree , saue that the one , was of the ancienter house . The other , in curtesie , asked his Hand to kisse : which hee gaue him : And he kist it : But said withall , to right himselfe , by way of Friendship ; Well , I and you , against any two of them : Putting himselfe first . 176. Nerua the Empe●… , succeeded Do●… , who was ay●…nicall ; so as in his 〈◊〉 , many noble ●…ouses , were ouer●…rowne , by false Ac●…tions ; the Instru●…ents whereof , were ●…iefly , Marcellus and Regulus . The Emperour , one night , 〈◊〉 , 〈◊〉 , with some 〈◊〉 o●… seuen : Amongst which , there was one , that was a dangerous Man , and began to take , the like courses , as Marcellus , and Regulus had done . The Emperour fell into discourse , of the Iniustice , and Tyranny , of the former time , and by name , of the two Accusers , and said ; What should wee doe with them , if wee had them now ? One of them , that were at supper , and was a free spokē Senatour , said ; Marry , they should sup with vs. 177. There was one that found a great masse of money , digged vnder ground , in his Grand-fathers house . And being some what doubtfull of the case , signified it to the Emperour , that hee had found such Treasure . The Emperour made a Rescript thus ; Vse it . Hee writ backe againe , that the summe was greater then his Estate or Condition could vse . The Emperour writ a new Rescript , thus ; Abuse it . 178. A Spaniard was censuring to a French Gentleman , the want of deuotion amongst the French : In that , whereas in Spaine , when the Sacrament goes to the sicke , any that meets with it , turnes backe , & waits vpon it to the house whither it goes : But in France , they onely doe reuerence , and passe by . But the French Gentle-man answered him ; There is reason for it , for here with vs , Christ is secure amongst his Frends ; but in Spaine , there be so many Iewes and Marano's , that it is not amisse for him to haue a Conuoy . 179. Coranus the Spaniard , at a table at dinner , fell into an extolling of his owne Father , and sayd ; If he should haue wished of God , he could not haue chosen amongst men , a better Father . Sir Henrie Sauill sayd ; What , not Abraham ? Now Coranus was doubted to descend of a race of Iewes . 180. Consaluo would say ; The honour of a Souldier ought to be of a good strong webbe : Meaning , that it should not be so fine and curious , that euerie little disgrace should catch , and sticke in it . 181. One of the Seuen was wont to say ; That Lawes were like Copwebs ; where the small Flies were caught , and the great brake thorow . 182. Bias gaue in precept ; Loue , as if you should hereafter hate ; and hate , as if you should hereafter loue . 183. Aristippus being reprehended of Lu●…urie , by one that was not rich , for that he gaue six Crownes for a small Fish , answered ; Why , what would you haue giuen ? The other said ; Some twelue pence . Aristippus said againe ; And six Crownes is no more with me . 184. There was a French Gentleman speaking with an English , of the Law Salique ; That women were excluded to inherit the Crown of France . The English sayd ; Yes , but that was meant of the women themselues , not of such Males as claim'd by women . The French Gentleman sayd ; Where doe you finde that Glosse ? The English answered ; He tell you , Sir , looke on the backside of the Record of the Law Salique , and there you shall finde it endorsed . Meaning , there was no such thing at all , as the Law Salique , but that it was a Fiction . 185. There was a Frier in earnest dispute about the Law Salique , that would needs proue it by Scripture ; citing that verse of the Gospell ; Lilia agri non laborant , neque nent : Which is as much to say , ( saith he ) that the Flower de luces of France cannot descend , neither to Distaffe , nor Spade : that is , not to a woman , nor to a Peasant . 186. Iulius Caesar , as hee passed by , was by acclamation of some that were suborned , called King ; to trie how the people would take it . The People shewed great murmur and distaste at it . Caesar finding where the winde stood , slighted it , and said ; I am not King , but Caesar : As if they had mistooke his name : For Rex was a Surname amongst the Romans , as King is with vs. 187. When Croesus , for his glory , shewed Solon great Treasure of Gold , Solon sayd to him ; If another come , that hath better iron then you , hee will bee Master of all this Gold. 188. There was a Gentleman that came to the Tilt , all in Orenge tawnie , and ranne verie ill . The next day he came all in Green , and ranne worse There was one of the Lookers on askt another ; What 's the reason , that this Gentleman changeth his Colours ? The other answered ; Sure , because it may be reported , that the Gentleman in the Greene ranne worse then the Gentleman in the Orenge tawnie . 189. Aristippus sayd , That those that studied particular Sciences , & neglected Philosophie , were like Penelopes Wooers , that made loue to the waiting women . 190. Plato reproued seuerely a young man , for entring into a dissolute house . The young man sayd to him ; What , for so small a matter ? Plato replyed ; But Custome is no small matter . 191. There was a Law made by the Romans against the Briberie and Extortion of the Gouernours of Prouinces . Cicero saith , in a Speech of his to the People ; That hee thought the Prouinces would petition to the State of Rome , to haue that Law repealed . For ( saith hee ) before , the Gouernours did bribe and extort as much as was sufficient for themselues ; but now they bribe and extort as much as may be enough , not only for themselues , but for the Iudges , and Iurours , and Magistrates . 192. Archidamus King of Lacedemon , hauing receiued from Philip King of Macedon , after Philip had won the victorie of Cheronea vpon the Athenians , proud Letters , writ backe to him ; That if hee measured his owne shadow , hee should finde it no longer now , then it was before his victorie . 193. Pyrrhus , when his Frends congratulated to him his victorie ouer the Romans , vnder the conduct of Fabricius , but with great slaughter of his owne side , said to them againe ; Yes , but if we haue such another victorie , wee are vndone . 194. Cineas was an excellent Oratour and States-man , and principall Frend & Counsellour to Pyrrhus ; And falling in inward talke with him , and discerning the Kings endlesse ambition , Pyrrhus opened himselfe to him ; That he intended first a warre vpon Italy , and hoped to atchieue it . Cineas asked him ; Sir , what will you doe then ? Then ( saith he ) wee will attempt Sicily . Cineas said ; Well Sir , what then ? Then ( saith Pyrihus ) if the Gods fauour vs , we may conquer Asfrick and Carthage . What then , Sir ? saith Cineas . Nay then ( saith Pyrrhus ) wee may take our rest , and sacrifice , and feast euerie day , and make merry withour Frends . Alas Sir ( said Cineas ) may we not doe so now , without all this adoe ? 195. The Embassadours of Asia Minor came to Antonius , after hee had imposed vpon them a double taxe , and said plainely to him ; That if he would haue two Tributes in one yeere , he must giue them two S●…ed-times , and two Haruests . 196. Plato was wont to say of his Master Socrates ; That hee was like the Apothecaries Galley-pots , that had on the outside Apes , and Owles , and Satyres , but within precious drugs . 197. Lamia the Curtisan had all power with Demetrius King of Macedon : And by her instigation he did many vniust & cruell Acts. Wherupon Lysimachus said ; That it was the first time , that euer hee knew a Whore play in a Tragedie . 198. The mistocles would say of himselfe ; That hee was like a Plaine Tree , that in Tempests men fled to him , and in faire wether , men were euer cropping his leanes . 199. The mistocles said of Speech ; That it was like Arras , that spred abroad shewes faire Images , but contracted , is but like packs . 200. Brisquet , Iester to Francis the first of France , did keepe a Kalender of Fooles ; wherewith he did vse to make the King sport ; telling him euer the reason , why hee put euerie one into his Kalender . So when Charles the fifth passed , vpon confidence of the noble nature of Francis , thorow France , for the appeasing of the rebellion of Gaunt , Brisquet put him into his Kalender . The King asking the cause , he sayd ; Because you hauing suffered at the hands of Charles , the greatest bitternesse that euer Prince did from other , hee would trust his person into your hands . Why Brisquet , ( said the King ) what wilt thou say , if thou seest him passe in as great safetic , as if it were thorow the midst of Spaine ? Saith Brisquet , Why then I will put out him , and put in you . 201. Lewis the cleuenth of France , hauing much abated the greatnesse and power of the Peeres , Nobilitie , and Court of Parliament , would say ; That hee had brought the Crowne out of Ward . 202. Sir Fulke Greuill , in Parliament , when the Lower House , in a great Businesse of the Queenes , stood much vpon Presidents , said vnto them ; Why should you stand so much vpon Presidents ? the times hereafter will be good or bad : If good , Presidents will doe no harme ; if bad , Power will make a way where it findes none . 203. When Peace was renewed with the French in England , diuerse of the great Counsellours were presented from the French with Iewells . The Lo. Henrie Ho ward was omitted . Whereupon the King said to him ; My Lo. How hap's it that you haue not a Iewell , as well as the rest ? My Lo. Henrie answered againe , ( alluding to the Fable in Aesope ; ) Non sum Gallus , itaque non reperi Gemmam . 204. An Oratour of Athens said to Demosthenes ; The Athenians will kill you , if they wax mad . Demosthenes replyed ; And they will kill you , if they bee in good sense . 205. Alexander sent to Phocyon a great Present of money . Phocyon said to the Messenger ; Why doth the King send to me , and to none else ? The Messenger answered ; Because hee takes you to be the onely good Man in Athens . Phocyon replyed ; If he thinke so , pray let him suffer mee to be good still . 206. Cosmus Duke of Florence was wont to say of perfidious Frends ; That wee reade , that we ought to forgiue our Enemies ; but we doe not reade , that wee ought to forgiue our Frends . 207. Aeneas Syluius , that was Pius Secundus , was wont to say ; That the former Popes did wisely , to set the Lawyers on worke , to debate , whether the Donation of Constantine the Gr●…at to Syluester , were good and valid in Law , or no ? The better to skip ouer the matter in fact , whether there were any such thing at all , or no ? 208. At a Banquet , where those that were called the Seuen Wise Men of Greece , were inuited by the Embassadour of a Barbarous King , the Embassadour related ; That there was a Neighbour King , mightier then his Master , pickt quarrells with him , by making impossible demands , otherwise threatning warre : And now at that present had demanded of him , to drinke vp the Sea. Whereunto one of the Wise Men said ; I would haue him vndertake it . Why ( saith the Embassadour ) how shall he come off ? Thus ; ( saith the Wise Man ) Let that King first stop the Riuers that runne into the Sea , which are no part of the Bargaine , and then your Master will performe it . 209. At the same Banquet , the Embassadour desired the Seuen , and some other Wise Men , that were at the Banquet , to deliuer euerie one of them some Sentence or Parable , that hee mought report to his King the wisdome of Grecia . Which they did . Onely one was silent . Which the Embassadour perceiuing , sayd to him ; Sir , let it not displease you , why doe not you say somewhat , that I may report ? Hee answered ; Report to your Lo. that there are of the Grecians , that can hold their peace . 210. One of the Romans said to his Frend ; What thinke you of such an one , as was taken with the manner in adulterie ? The other answered ; Marrie , I thinke , hee was slow at dispatch . 211. Lycurgus would say of diuerse of the Heroes of the Heathen ; That hee wondred that men should mourne vpon their dayes , for them , as mortall men , and yet sacrifice to them as Gods. 212. A Papist being opposed by a Protestant , that they had no Scripture for Images , answered ; Yes , for you reade , that the People layd their ficke in the streets , that the shadow of St. Peter mought come vpon them : And that a shadow was an Image : And the obscurest of Images . 213. There is an Ecclesiasticall Writer of the Papists , to proue Antiquitie of Confessio , in the forme that it now is , doth note , that in very ancient times , euen in the Primitiue times , amongst other foule slanders spred against the Christians , one was ; That they did adore the Genitories of their Priests . Which ( he saith ) grew from the posture of the Confessant , and the Priest in Confession : which is , that the Confessant kneeles downe , before the Priest fitting in a raised chaire aboue him . 214. Epaminondas , whe his great Frend and Colleague in warre , was Sutour to him , to pardon an Offender , denied him . Afterwards , when a Concubine of his made the same sute , hee granted it to her : Which when Pelopidas seemed to take vnkindely , hee sayd ; Such sutes are to bee granted to whores , but not to Personages of worth . 215. The Lacedemonians had in custome to speake verie short . Which , being in Empire , they mought doe at pleasure . But after their Defeat at Leuctra , in an Assembly of the Grecians , they made a long Inuectiue against Epa●…ondas ; who stood vp , and said no more , but this ; I am glad we haue taught you to speake long , 216. Fabricius , in conference with Pyrrhus , was tempted to reuolt to him ; Pyrrhus telling him , that hee should bee Partner of his Fortunes , and second Person to him . But Fabricius answered , in a scorne , to such a motion ; Sir , that would not bee good for your selfe : For if the Epyrotes once know me , they will rather desire to bee gouerned by me , then by you . 217. Fabius Maximus being resolued to draw the warre in length , still waited vpon Hannibals progresse , to curbe him ; And for that purpose , hee encamped vpon the high Grounds . But Terentius his Collegue fought with Hannibal , and was in great perill of ouerthrow . But then Fabius came downe the high Grounds , & got the day : Whereupon Hannibal sayd ; That he did euer think , that that same Cloud that hanged vpon the Hills , would at one time or other , giue a Tempest . 218. There was a cowardly Spanish Souldier , that in a Defeat the Moores gaue , ran away with the foremost . Afterwards , when the Armie generally fled , this Souldier was missing Whereupon , it was sayd by some , that he was ●…saine . No sure , ( saith one ) he is aliue , for the Moores eat no ●…ares flesh . 219. Hanno the Carthaginian was sent Commissioner , by the ●…tate , after the second Carthaginian Warre , to Rome , to supplicate for peace , and in the end obtained it . Yet one of the sharper Senatours sayd ; You haue often broken with vs the Peaces , whereunto you haue beene sworne , I pray , by what Gods will you sweare ? Hanno answered ; By the same Gods , that haue punished the former periurie so seuerely . 220. Thales being asked , when a Man should marrie , sayd ; Young Men not yet , old Men not at all . 221. Thales sayd ; That ●…fe and Death were 〈◊〉 one . One that was ●…esent askt him ; Why doe not you die then ? Thales sayd againe ; Because they ●…e all one . 222. Caesar , after first he had possest Rome , Pompey being fled , offered to enter the sacred Treasurie , to take the Moneys that were there stored . Metellus , Tribune of the People , did forbid him . And when Metellus was violent in it , and would not desist , Caefar turned to him , and sayd ; Presume no further , or I will lay you dead . And when Metellus was with those words somewhat astonisht , Caesar added ; Young Man , it had beene easier ●…e to doe this , then 〈◊〉 speake it . 223. An Aegyptian Priest ●…uing conference with Solon , sayd to him ; You Grecians ●…e euer children ; you ●…e no Knowledge of ●…quitie , nor Antiqui●… of Knowledge . 224. The Counsell did make remonstrance to Queene Elizabeth , of the continuall Conspiracies against her Life : And namely , of a late one : And shewed her a Rapier , taken from a Conspiratour , that had a false chape , being of browne paper , but gilt ouer , as it could not be knowne from a chape of Mettall ; which was deuised , to the end , that without drawing , the Rapier mought giue a stab ; And , vpon this occasion , aduised her , that shee should goe lesse abroad to take the aire , weakly accompanied , as shee vsed . But the Queene answered ; That shee had rather be dead , then put in custodie . 225. Chilon would say ; That Gold was tried with the Touch-stone , and Men with Gold. 226. Zelim was the first of the Ottomans that did shaue his beard , whereas his Predecessours wore it long . One of his Basha's askt him ; Why be altred the custome of his Predecessours ? He answered ; Because , you Basha's , shall not leade me by the beard , as you did them . 227. Diogenes was one day in the Market-place , with a candle in his hand , And be●…ng askt ; What hee sought ? He sayd ; He sought a Man. 228. Bi●…s being asked ; How a Man should order his life answered ; As if a Man should liue long , or die quickly . 229. Queene Elizabeth was entertained , by my Lo. Burleigh at Theobalds : And at her going away , my Lo. obtained of the Queene , to make seuen Knights . They were Gentlemen of the Countrey , of my Lords Frends and Neighbours . They were placed in a rank , as the Queene should passe by the Hall ; And to winne Antiquitie of Knight hood , in order , as my Lo. fauoured ; though indeed the more principall Gentle-men were placed lowest . The Queene was told of it , and said nothing ; but when she went along , shee passed them all by , as far as the skreene , as if shee had forgot it : And when shee came to the skreene , she seemed to take herselfe with the maner , and sayd ; I had almost forgot what I promised . With that she turned backe , and knighted the lowest first , and so vpward Wherupon Mr. Stanhope of the Pri●… Chamber , a while after told her ; Your Maiestic was too fine for my Lo. B●…leigh . She answered ; I haue but fulfilled the Scrip●…re ; The first shall bee ●…st , and the last first . 230. Simonides being ●…sked of Hiero ; What hee thought of God ? ●…skt a Seuen-nights time , to consider of it . And at the Seuen-nights end , hee askt a Forthnights time . At the Forthnights end , 〈◊〉 Moneth . At which Hiero maruelling , Simonides answered ; That the longer hee thought on it , the more difficult he found it . 231. Anacharsis would say concerning the Popular Estates of Graecia ; That he wondred , how at Athens , Wise Men did propose , and Fooles did dispose . 232. Solon compared the People vnto the ●…ea , and Oratours to ●…he Windes ; For that ●…he Sea would be calme ●…nd quiet , if the Windes did not trouble it . 233. Socrates was pronounced by the Oracle of Delphos , to be the wisest Man of Greece ; which hee would put from himselfe , ironically saying ; There could bee nothing in him to verifie the Oracle , except this ; That he w●… not wise , and knew it ; and others were not wise , and knew it not . 234. Caro the Elder , what time many of the Romans had Statua's crected in their Honour , was askt by one in a kinde of wonder ; Why he had 〈◊〉 ? And answered ; ●…e had much rather , ●…en should aske , and ●…onder , why he had no 〈◊〉 , than why hee ●…ad a Statua . 235. Sir Fulke Greuill , had much and pri●…ate accesse , to Queen Elizabeth , which hee vsed honourably , & did many men good , yet he would say merrily of himselfe ; That hee was like Robin Goodfellow ; For when the Maides spilt the Milke-pans , or kept any racket , they would lay it vpon Robin : So what tales , the Ladies about the Queene , told her , or other bad offices , that they did , they would put it vpon him . 236. Socrates , when there was shewed him , the Booke of Heraclitus the Obscure , and was askt his opinion of it , answered ; Those things , that I vnderstood , were excellent , I imagine , so were those , that I vnderstood not : But they require a Diuer of Delos . 237. Bion askt an enuious Man , that was very fad ; What harme had befallen to him , or what good had be●…en to another Man ? 238. Stilpo , the Philosopher , when the people flocked about him , and that one said to him ; The people come wondring about you , as if it were , to see some strange Beast . No , ( saith he ) it is to see a Man , which Diogenes sought with his Lanthorne . 239. Antisthenes , being asked of one ; What Learning was most ne●…fary for Mans life ? answered ; To vnlearne that which is naught . 240. There was a politicke Sermon , that had no Diuinity in it , was preached before the King. The King , as he came forth , said to Bishop Andrewes ; Call you this a Sermon ? The Bishop answered ; And it please your Maiesty , by a charitable construction , it may be a Sermon . 241. Bishop Andrewes , was asked , at the first cōming ouer of the Bishop of Spalato ; Whether he were a Protestant , or no ? He answered Truly , I know not , but hee is a Detestant , ; of diuers Opinions of Rome . 242. Caius Marius , was Generall of the Romans , against the Cimbers , who came , with such a Sea of Multitude , vpon Italy . In the fight , there was a Band of the Cadurcians , of a Thousand , that did notable seruice . Whereupon , after the fight , Marius did Denison them all , for Cittizens of Rome , though there was no Law to warrant it . One of his Friends , did represent it vnto him , that hee had transgressed the Law , because that priuiledge , was not to be granted , but by the People , Whereto Marius answered ; That for the noyse of Armes , hee could not heare the Lawes . 243. Aeneas Syluius would say ; That the Christian Faith and Law , though it had not ●…eene confirmed by Miracles , yet was worthy to bee receiued , for the Honesty thereof . 244 Henry Noel would say ; That Courtiers were like Fasting Daies ; They were next the Holy-daies , but in themselues , they were the most meager Daies , of the weeke . 245. Mr. Bacon would say ; That it was in Businesse , as it is commonly in wayes ; That the next way is commonly the foulest , and that if a Man will goe the fairest way , hee must goe somewhat about . 246. Augustus Caesar , out of great indignation , against his two Daughters , and Post●…umus Agrippa , his Grand-child ; whereof the first two were infamous , and the last otherwise vnworthy , would fay ; That they were not his Seed , but some Impostumes , that ●…ad broken from him . 247. Catosaid ; The best way , to keepe good Acts in memory , was to refresh them with now . 248. Poni●…ey did consum●…e the warre against . Sertorius , When M●…ellus had brought the Enemi●… some what low . H●… did also consummat the w●… against the Fugitiues , whom Crassus had before defeated in a great B●…taile . So when Lu●…llus , had had great ●…nd glorious Victo●…ies , against Mithri●…ates , and Tigranes , ●…er Pompey , by ●…eanes his Friends ●…ade , was sent , to ●…ut an end , to that ●…arre . Whereupon Lucullus , taking indignation , as a disgrace offered to himselfe , said ; That Pompey was a carrion 〈◊〉 , that when others had strooken downe Bodies , he came to prey vpon them . 249. Diogenes , when Mice came about him , as he was eating , said ; I see , that euen Diogenes nourisheth Parafites . 250. Epictetus vsed to say ; That one of the vulgar , in any ill that happens to him , blames ●…hers : A Nouice in ●…hilosophy , blames himselfe : And a philo●…opher , blames neither the one , nor the other . 251. Hiero , visited by Pythagoras , askthim ; Of what condition he was ? Pythagoras answered ; Sir , I kno●… you haue beene at the Olympian Games . Yes , saith Hiero. Thither ( faith Pythagoras ) come some , to win the Prizes . Some come to sell their Merchandize , because it is a kinde of Mart of all Greece . Some come , to meet their Friends , and make merry , because of the great confluence of all sorts . Others come onely to looke on . I am one of them , that come to looke on . Meaning it of Philosophy , and the Contemplatiue Life . 252. Mr. Bettenham vsed to say ; That Riches were like Mucke : When it lay , vpon an heape , it gaue but a stench , and ill odour ; but when it was spread vpon the ground , then it was cause of much fruit . 253. The same Mr. Bettenham said ; That tuous Men , were like some Herbs , and Spices , that giue not their sweet smell , till they bee broken , and crushed . 254. There was a Painter , became a Physician . Whereupon , one said to him ; You haue done well ; For before , the faults of your work were seene , but now they are vnseene . 255. One of the Philosophers was askt ; What a wise Man differed from a Foole ? He answered ; Send them both naked , to those that know them not , and you shall perceiue . 256. Caesar , in his Booke , that he made against Cato , ( which is lost , ) did write , to shew the force of Opinion , and Reuerence , of a Man , that had once obtained , a popular reputation ; That there were some , that found Cato drunke , and they were ashamed , in stead of Cato . 257. Aristippus , sayling in a Tempest , shewed signes of Feare . One of the Sea-men said to him , in an insulting manner ; Wee that are Plebeians , are not troubled , you , that are a Philosopher , are afraid . Aristippus answered ; There is not the like wager vpon it , for me to perish , and you , 258. There was an Oratour , that defended a cause of Aristippus , and preuailed . Afterwards , he askt Aristippus ; Now , in your distresse , what did Socrates doe you good ? Aristippus answered ; Thus ; in making true , that good , which you said of me . 259. Aristippus said ; He tooke money of his Friends , not so much to vse it himselfe , as to teach them , how to bestow their money . 260. A Strumpet said to Aristippus ; That she was with child by him : Hee answered ; You know that no more , than , if you went through a Hedge of Thornes , you could say , This Thorne prickt me . 261. The La. Paget , that was very priuate with Queene Elizabeth , declared her selfe much , against her Match , with Monsieur . After Monsieurs Death , the Queene tooke extreame griefe ( at least as shee made shew ) And kept within her Bed-Chamber , and one Ante-Chamber , for 3. weekes space , in token of Mourning . At last , shee came forth , into her Priuy-Chamber , and admitted her Ladies , to haue accesse vnto her ; And amongst the rest , my La. Paget presented her selfe , and came to her , with a smiling countenace The Queene bent her browes , and seem'd to bee highly displeased , and said to her ; Madam , you are not ignorant , of my extreme griefe , and do you come to mee , with a countenance of ioy ? My Lady Paget answered ; Alas , and it please your Maiesty , it is impossible for me , to be absent from you 3 weekes , but that when I see you , I must looke cheerefully No , no , ( said the Queene , not forgetting her former auerlenesse from the Match ) You haue some other conceit in it ; Tell me plainely . My Lady answered ; I must obey you . It is this . I was thinking , how happy your Maiesty was , in that you married not Monsieur : For seeing , you take such thought , for his Death , being but your Friend , if he had beene your Husband , sure it would haue cost you your life . 262. Sir Edward Dyer , a graue and wise Gentleman , did much beleeue in Kelley the Alchymist ; That hee did indeed the worke , and made Gold : Insomuch , as hee went himselfe into Germany , where Kelly then was , to informe himselfe fully thereof . After his returne , he dined with my Lord of Canterbury , where , at that time , was at the Table , Dr. Browne the Phifician . They fell in talke of Kelley . Sir Edward Dyer , turning to the Archbishop , said ; I doe assure your Grace , that , that I shall tell you , is truth . I am an Eie-witnesse thereof , and if I had not seene it , I should not haue beleeued it . I saw Master Kelly put of the base Mettall into the Chrusible , and after it was set a little vpon the fire , and a verie small quantitie of the Medicine put in , and ●…tirr'd with a sticke of wood , it came forth in great proportion , perfect Gold , to the Touch , to the Hammer , to the Test. Said the Bishop ; You had need take heed , what you say , Sir Edward Dier , for heere is an Infidel at the Board . Sir Edward Dier said againe pleasantly ; I would haue lookt for in Infidell , sooner in any place , than at your Graces table . What say you Doctor Browne ? Saith the Bishop . Dr. Browne answered , after his blunt , and hudling manner ; The Gentleman hath spoken enough for me . Why , ( ●…aith the Bishop ) What hath hee said ? Marry , ( saith Doctor Browne ) he said , he would not haue beleeu'd it , except hee bad seene it ; And no more will I. 263. Democritus said ; That Truth did lie in profound pits , and when it was got , it needed much refining . 264. Dr. Iohnson said ; That in sicknesse there were three things , that were materiall : The Physician ; the Disease ; and the Patient . And if any two of these ioyned , then they haue the victorie : For , Ne Hercules quidem contra duos . If the Physician and the Patient ioyne , then downe goes the Disease ; for the Patient recouers . If the Physician and the Disease ioyne , then downe goes the Patient ; that is , where the Physician mistakes the cure . If the Patient and the Disease ioyne , then downe goes the Physician ; for hee is discredited . 265. Alexander visited Diogenes in his Tub. And when hee askt him ; What hee would desire of him ? Diogenes answered ; That you would stand a little aside , that the Sunne may come to me . 266. Diogenes said of a young Man that danced daintily , and wasmuch commended ; The better , the worse . 267. Diogenes called an ill Musician , Cocke . Why ? ( saith hee : ) Diogenes answered ; Because when you crow , Men vse to rise . 268. Heraclitus the Obscure sayd ; The drie Light was the best Soule . Meaning , when the Faculties Intellectuall are in vigour , not wet , nor , as it were , blouded by the Affections . 269. There was in Oxford a cowardly Fellow , that was a verie good Archer . Hee was abused grossely by another , and moaned himselfe to Walter Ralegh , then a Scholler , and askt his aduice ; What hee should doe to repaire the wrong had beene offred him ? Ralegh answered ; Why , challenge him at a match of ●…ting . 270. White head , a graue Diuine , was much esteemed by Queene Elizabeth , but not preferred , because hee was against the gouernment of Bishops . Hee was of a blunt Stoicall Nature . Hee came one day to the Queene , and the Queene happened to say to him ; I like thee the better , Whitehead , because thouliuest vnmarried . Hee answered againe ; In troth , Madam , I like you the worse for the same cause . 271. There was a Noble-man that was leane of visage , but immediately after his Marriage hee grew prettie plumpe & fat . One said to him ; Your Lop. doth contrarie to other married Men ; for they at the first wax leane , and you wax fat . Sir Walter Ralegh stood by , and sayd ; Why , there is no Beast , that if you take him from the Common , and put him into the Seuerall , but hee will wax fat . 272. Diogenes seeing one that was a Bastard , casting stones among the People , bade him take heed , He hit not his Father . 27 Dr. Lawd sayd ; That some Hypocrites , and seeming mortified men , that held downe their heads , were like little Images , that they place in the verie bowing of the vaults of Churches , that looke , as if they held vp the Church , but are but Puppets . 274. It was sayd among some of the graue Prelates of the Councell of Trent , in which the Schoole-Diuines bore the sway ; That the Schoole-men were like the Astronomers ; who , to saue the Phenomena , framed to their conceit Eccentricks , & Epicycles , and a wonderfull Engine of Orbes , though no such things were : So they , to saue the practise of the Church , had deuised a number of strange Positions . 275. It was also said by many , concerning the Canons of that Councell ; That wee are beholding to Aristotle for many Articles of our Faith. 276. The Lo. Henrie Howard , being Lo. Priuie Seale , was askt by the King openly at the Table , ( where commonly hee entertained the King ) vpon the sudden . My Lo , haue you not a desire to see Rome ? My Lo. Priuie Seale answered ; Yes indeed , Sir. The King sayd ; And why ? My Lo. answered ; Because , and it please your Maiestie , it was once the Seat of the greatest Monarchie : And the Seminarie of the brauest men in the world , amongst the Heathen : And then againe , because after it was the See of so many holy Bishops in the Primitiue Church , most of them Martyrs . The King would not giue it ouer , but sayd ; And for nothing else ? My Lo. answered ; Yes , and it please your Maiestie , for two things especially . The one , to see him , who they say hath such a power , to forgiue other mens sinnes , to confesse his owne sinnes vpon his knees , before a Chaplaine or Priest : And the other is , to heare Antichrist say his Creed . 277. There was a Noble-man sayd of a great Counsellour ; That hee would haue made the worst Farrier in the world , for he neuer shod horse , but hee cloyed him : so , he neuer commended any man to the King for seruice , or vpon occasion of sute , or otherwise , but that he would come in , in the end , with a But , and driue in a naile to his disaduantage . 278. There was a Ladie of the West Country , that gaue great Entertainment at her House to most of the gallant Gentlemen thereabout : And amongst others , Sir Walter Ralegh was one . This Lady , though otherwise a stately Dame , was a notable good Huswife ; and in the morning betimes , she called to one of her Maids , that lookt to the Swine , and askt ; Is the piggy serued ? Sir Walter Raleghs Chamber was fast by the Ladies , so as hee heard her . A little before dinner , the Ladie came downe , in great state , into the great chamber , which was full of Gentlemen : And as soone as Sir Walter Ralegh set eye vpon her ; Madam ( saith hee ) is the piggie serued ? The La. answered ; You know best , whether you haue had your Breakefast . 279. There was a Gentleman fell verie sicke , and a Frend of his said to him ; Surely you are in danger ; I pray send for a Physician . But the sicke man answered ; It is no matter , for if I die , I will die at leisure . 280. There was an Epicurean vaunted , that diuerse of other Sects of Philosophers , did after turne Epicureans , but there was neuer any Epicurean , that turned to any other Sect. Wherupon , a Philosopher , that was of another Sect , said ; The reason was plaine , for that Cocks may bee made Capons , but Capons could neuer be made Cocks . FINIS .