MFYE Integration 1 Lonergan 1 Professor Helm Moreau First Year Experience 15 October 2021 There’s Only Room to Grow I believe that I grow by being vulnerable. While being vulnerable is scary and intimidating, it’s important in order to truly be yourself and create comfortability in the world around you. As a first-year, I was so frightened about finding my place on campus. I was worried that I wouldn’t make friends, or that I’d feel alone in a place so vast and new. However, in openly being myself and lowering any pressures or expectations I had walking onto campus, I’ve been the most free and accepting of who I am than I ever have before. Being vulnerable doesn’t just equate to explicitly stating that you are going to be accepting of yourself, but instead acting on that notion. Personally, I was vulnerable in regards to friendships on campus. My first couple of weeks at school I texted a couple of girls that I had either met during Welcome Weekend, my classes, or mutual friends, and invited them to dinner or to simply hang out. All of the people currently in my friend group are people that I was originally vulnerable with because I put myself out there and asked them to hang out. While this might appear as a simple action, it’s one that requires a lot of vulnerability. With putting yourself out there comes the risk of rejection, which is the most painstaking part of life. Although, as soon as you accept yourself, you are able to live vulnerably without the fear that someone else can alter your perception of who you are inside. For example, Dr. Brené Brown explains, “There was only one variable that separated the people who had a strong sense of love and belonging, and really struggle for it, and that was that the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and Lonergan 2 belonging” (“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brené Brown - Moreau FYE Week One). The biggest obstacle between a person and their goal is themselves, which is emphasized here. In general, I think that everyone just wants to be loved and less-alone; however, we tend to desire those feelings while subconsciously hiding from ourselves. David Brooks emphasized this point by describing that in order to come to terms with the most genuine and vulnerable version of yourself, “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin, out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” ("Should You Live for Your Résumé or Your Eulogy?" by David Brooks - Moreau FYE Week Two). In acting certain ways to gain people’s approval, or placing barriers between ourselves and the world, we’re only putting ourselves at a disservice. In being vulnerable within, we are all able to grow into our best selves because we are able to push ourselves amidst the discomfort. I believe that I am searching for a place. With our Week Four lesson on life giving relationships, I realized how important it is to surround yourself with people that make you feel comfortable. Especially living independently for the first time in my entire life, I’ve realized that home is not a place, but instead the people you surround yourself with. While I used to hear that sentence frequently- and I always found it to be cliché- I’ve recently realized the truth in it. I haven’t been homesick once, but I’ve missed my parents and my little sister more than ever. The other day when I was walking around the lake talking to my parents, it struck me that while I miss my bed, my own room, and my shower, I don’t necessarily miss my home. I miss my mom’s hugs, my dad’s jokes, and my sister’s presence. As we discussed in our Week Six discussion, your environment shapes you to be the person you end up becoming. In drawing on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&feature=youtu.be https://youtu.be/MlLWTeApqIM Lonergan 3 George Ella Lyon’s Poem “Where I’m From”, she mentions, “I'm from the know-it-alls/and the pass-it-ons,/from Perk up! and Pipe down!” ("Where I'm From" by George Ella Lyon - Moreau FYE Week Six). Here the poet emphasizes that relationships, people, and things are where one is from- not a time or place. In distinguishing what truly shapes an individual, it’s important to note the impact of relationships on ourselves. With that in mind, the importance of relationships and the complexity of forging new ones during this period of my life is ever present. A comment from one source stated, “The best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” ("5 Signs You're In a Toxic Friendship" by Olivia T. Taylor - Moreau FYE Week Four). This sentence encapsulates the importance and value of relationships. I miss my family because they pushed me to be the best version of myself, and they loved me wholeheartedly. As I make new friends on campus, I think that I hope to find people who instill the same energy in me. I believe that I am made to help others. Knowledge is power, and that point is emphasized here on campus. Notre Dame’s mission is to not just create smart people, but good people. To me, there’s no point in learning if you’re not going to implement your knowledge into the world. With thousands of students coming to campus this year- all with different experiences, backgrounds, and stories- I think that it’s crucial to share our stories with each other. Especially in noting our lesson on pursuing truth amidst implicit biases, the idea that educating one another is crucial to the success of accomplishing equality was noted. One point that especially stook out to me was that “White applicants get about 50 percent more callbacks than Black applicants with the same resumes; college professors are 26 percent more likely to respond to a student’s email when it is signed by Brad rather than Lamar; and physicians recommend less pain medication for http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ Lonergan 4 Black patients than white patients with the same injury” ("How to Destroy Truth" by David Brooks - Moreau FYE Week Seven ). This was something that I was completely unaware of; however, in acknowledging racial bias and educating not only ourselves, but each other, we can then progress as a society. Additionally, in Week 5’s lesson, Carla Harris touched on the value in education in stating that, “The way to amplify your life is to use who you are, what you know, and who you know to help others, for that will take your life from success to significance” ("2021 Laetare Medalist Address" by Carla Harris - Moreau FYE Week Five). My mom has always said, “take something you like and take something you’re good at and make it your job”, which has a similar connotation to Harris’. With these points in mind, this semester I’ve attempted to use my love and passion for writing to help my community. I began writing for The Scholastic in order to use my knowledge to educate others about what’s happening on our campus so that people are equipped to be in touch with their environment. While it might appear as a minor service to the community, the impact is still important to note because each minor action has a reaction. I know that I’m made to help others, and this is one stepping stone to accomplishing that goal on campus. Additionally, on Notre Dame’s campus, I feel such a stronger connection to God. With the university highlighting the importance of faith, I’ve begun to realize how my faith is incorporated into all aspects of my life. As mentioned in Week Three, “Everything is sacrament, everything speaks of God, nothing is ordinary, no one is ordinary, God can come through every experience, every neighbor is the face of God, every joy and sorrow can become a prayer” ("Faith Brings Light to a Dark World" by Professor David Fagerberg - Moreau FYE Week Three). Everything we do, everything we see, and everything we are is a piece of God. Faith is the foundation of the Earth, and when you realize its presence, your perspective of the world can change, and people can become more equipped in helping each other. My goal for https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringSource=articleShare https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjSwjn-SyB4 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau Lonergan 5 myself the next half of this semester and onwards is to use my faith to help guide me towards assisting others. In general, I know that I’m made to help others, and I think that I can do that by unifying the ideas of communicating with my peers to understand their stories, utilizing my own education and experiences to benefit the world around me, and staying in touch with my faith so that I can make an impact.